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Oswald: Why are you like this??

Bane: I used too much "No More Tears" shampoo as a kid and I haven't felt a single emotion since.

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Joker: What if mayonnaise came in cans?

Harleen: Well, that would suck because you can't microwave metal.

Oswald: Good morning to everyone except these two people.

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Joker: Hey, Batsy! Did you know your my BFFLWYLION?

Batman: What the hell is that supposed to mean?

Joker: Best Friend For Life Whether You Like It Or Not.

Batman:

Batman: That’s one way to say it, I guess…

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Harleen: If I run and leap at Bane, they will most certainly catch me in their arms.

Harleen, running towards Bane: Coming in!

Bane: No! I’m holding coffee!

Bane: *Drops coffee and catches Harleen*

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Jonathan: I think I mostly want to see what happens when this whole place breaks apart.

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Drury: So according to the cease and desist order I got, apparently you can’t ‘legally’ be a lawyer if your license is ‘cut out of a cereal box’.

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Drury: Okay, so the plan here is-

Garfield: *picking up his flamethrower and blasting off with his jetpack* GARFIEEEEEEEEELD LYYYYYYYYNNS!

Drury: …

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Oswald: *traps a wasp under a cup*

Edward: *appears and sets down two more cups*

Oswald: No...

Edward: *starts to shuffle them*

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Victor: I’d like to live through a week that’s not a whole new verse of “We Didn’t Start the Fire.”

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Joker: If you put a milkshake in one yard and crack open a cold one in another yard, which yard would the boys go to?

Harleen: Schrödinger's boys.

Waylon: FUCK!

Bane: What about cracking open a cold milkshake?

Jonathan: As we all know, the milkshake brings the boys to the yard. The presence of the boys is a prerequisite for the cracking open of a cold one, but cold ones do not have any inherent boy-attracting abilities. Milkshakes, however, do.

Jonathan: All else being equal, the boys would proceed to the milkshake yard. While it is possible to announce the presence of cold ones in the hope of attracting some boys, the pull of the milkshake is much more powerful by comparison.

Joker: ...

Harley: ...

Waylon: ...

Bane: ...

Jonathan: Mind you, all of this nonsense hinges on whether or not the boys are back in town.

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Harleen: Hey, you want a tarot reading?

Edward: Those are Pokemon cards.

Harleen: You got a magikarp.

Edward: ...

Harleen: It means 'fuck you'.

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I think Edward fucked up in that one comic, Edward and Barbara would’ve been a fun nerd couple

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Selina: What are you writing?

Oswald: The government wants to know what kind of weapons we have in the house. I'm letting them know it's private information.

Bane, looking over Oswald's shoulder: This just says 'fuck around and find out' in calligraphy.

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Harleen: Hello, McDonald's, I would like to purchase 130 chicken nuggets. Prepare yourselves.

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Joker: So I can either do something dumb that could very well get me injured or I can listen to Jonathan and not do the thing,

Joker: Well there’s a clear right answer here.

Joker: *proceeds to throw five packs of mentos into a barrel full of diet coke*

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Oswald: Could you all at least try to see this from my perspective?

Selina: *crouches down*

Bane: *kneels down*

Waylon: *sits on the floor*

Oswald:

Oswald: I hate all of you.

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Edward: Unfortunately, due to several experiences in my youth, I cannot just 'walk up and join a circle of people talking', but it does sound lovely, thank you.