jay-avian

[jay-avian]

epic but it's clair obscur expedition 33

(version without the UI under the cut!)

[jay-avian]

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[jay-avian]

[jay-avian]

Clair Obscur: Thoughts about the Writers (Worldbuilding)

So my fiance has been playing this game recently and has told me about the story and how the worlds work, and I have been so intrigued by everything that I had to just offload my thoughts. There are a few spoilers, so I'm going to leave everything under the cut. Read at your discretion

In the game, there is the world within the painting and the real world. I'm mainly going to be talking about the real world because there's so much potential for "what if"s.

We know that in the Painting we're playing in, the characters have free will. Their whole goal, essentially, is to destroy their creator. Even the painting version of Verso wants to stop what's happening. Verso was created exactly how Aline remembers him, and yet she has no full control over him--only his personality. This leads me into my next main question: what about the Writers?

When writing, we dictate everything a character does, from how they act, to what they say, and even what they think and how they feel. When painting or making visual still art, there's only so much that can go into it. A painter can determine certain rules and what people look like and relatively how they're supposed to act. But ultimately, the characters' choices are their own. What would that look like in a written story? Would the characters find some ways to rebel against the story? If they did, would the words on the paper change? Or would the writer simply feel inclined to write a certain way based on what the characters want? Some of us on Tumblr already claim that "my character does what they want", "they direct the story". Would it be the same here?

And when the Writer goes into their story, is that added into the manuscript somehow? What does that look like in the real world?

What got me thinking about all this was the singular thought: this game could lead to some very self-aware fanfiction. We know from Painting Verso that he was written with his counterpart's memories. So what about fictional characters that already exist? Would they remember their original story? How things were supposed to go? Would they question this change of fate? If someone were to rewrite this story, how much would they know or even accept?

[jay-avian]

Behold!! I made a DS case by hand!

[jay-avian]

Hi zima

It's might get loud Friday, a thing i totally didn't make up, so please tell me your favorite (silly) ways to relieve stress/overstimulation/burnout.

This is actually kind of ironic considering my Thursday was quite overstimulating 😅 I have sensory issues and an anxiety disorder, so it was not a fun day

I don't really know the answer to this question, but I wish I did. Most of the time, I get some alone time and attempt to distract my feelings with stuff (which is usually watching YouTube videos or listening to music). Though I guess I ought to find more fun and actually helpful ways to go about it!

I do enjoy a good Floor Time™ and have many plushies I could spend it with. I also found I really like Pokemon, so I could probably start playing that more. Working with my hands is always nice too. Been working on hand sewing myself a DS case, and that's been pretty chill! Oh yeah, I love coloring too! Makes my brain very happy

[jay-avian]

An Updated Writeblr Intro

Hey! I'm Charles (he/him), though I'll answer to just about any variation of my name. I'm a 24 year old auDHD trans dude.

I write in a wide variety of genres, but most of my stories involve crime, found family, queer romance, and/or sci-fi or fantasy elements.

I love being tagged in tag games and am always happy to answers asks people send about my WIPs, though I'm not always the best at responding in a timely fashion.

Current WIPs:

The Magician and Ms. Psychic: A story about a young woman struggling to make a name for herself as a supervillain. (intro post)

The Snap That Changed Everything: A twisted Hallmark-esque romance about a mafia hitwoman who finds herself catching feelings for her target. (intro post)

Planet Oz: A sci-fi retelling of The Wonderful Wizard of Oz. (intro post coming soon)

[jay-avian]

[jay-avian]

Writecamp - Day 10

Finally getting to these prompts! The ones I picked today: the bellow of thunder, the ease of strength (from this list) Thank you @agirlandherquill for hosting the event and @willtheweaver and @theeccentricraven for tagging me!

Based this newly written snippet from my story Morgensturm. Harelan is a dragonborn (humanoid dragon for those who don't know) and Caspian is a human.

Harelan closed his eyes as he tried to channel his power. Whatever this gift was had been made possible by his aggression. So what was he angry at? Caspian—for taking him hostage and driving him like a slave. The world—for treating him so cruelly. His clan—for keeping him blind. For not believing in him and holding him back. For being scared of what happened, and what could happen. The thoughts swirled and formed like storm clouds. They circled, and soon they started to spark in his belly, and went up to his throat. It warmed Harelan's body. Sparks shone through his scales. He lowered his body to the ground, claws digging into the sand.

Whip, went the lightning. Thunder bellowed from his throat, sending sand flying from under him. The cliffs around him shook, too. The bolt struck the precipice in the distance. It cracked apart on impact. Rock after rock fell, until in a moment, a chunk of the precipice fell entirely. It fell to the water creating wave-sized ripples. Harelan stayed still, doing nothing but breathe. How effortless it had been. And yet he stared at his work of destruction as if the god of storms himself had come down in rage.

Caspian had been holding steady from the force. Once the air settled, he eased, and then smiled. "See?" he asked. "I knew you had it in you."

Tagging @fleurtygurl @equallyreal @sugar-phoenix @rickie-the-storyteller @lyra-brie @morganmaietto @mysticstarlightduck @thedogfromthatmitskisong and whoever else wants to join!

[jay-avian]

The Neurodivergent Writer’s Guide to Fun and Productivity

(Even when life beats you down)

Look, I’m a mom, I have ADHD, I’m a spoonie. To say that I don’t have heaps of energy to spare and I struggle with consistency is an understatement. For years, I tried to write consistently, but I couldn’t manage to keep up with habits I built and deadlines I set.

So fuck neurodivergent guides on building habits, fuck “eat the frog first”, fuck “it’s all in the grind”, and fuck “you just need time management”—here is how I manage to write often and a lot.

Focus on having fun, not on the outcome

This was the groundwork I had to lay before I could even start my streak. At an online writing conference, someone said: “If you push yourself and meet your goals, and you publish your book, but you haven’t enjoyed the process… What’s the point?” and hoo boy, that question hit me like a truck.

I was so caught up in the narrative of “You’ve got to show up for what’s important” and “Push through if you really want to get it done”. For a few years, I used to read all these productivity books about grinding your way to success, and along the way I started using the same language as they did. And I notice a lot of you do so, too.

But your brain doesn’t like to grind. No-one’s brain does, and especially no neurodivergent brain. If having to write gives you stress or if you put pressure on yourself for not writing (enough), your brain’s going to say: “Huh. Writing gives us stress, we’re going to try to avoid it in the future.”

So before I could even try to write regularly, I needed to teach my brain once again that writing is fun. I switched from countable goals like words or time to non-countable goals like “fun” and “flow”.

Rewire my brain: writing is fun and I’m good at it

I used everything I knew about neuroscience, psychology, and social sciences. These are some of the things I did before and during a writing session. Usually not all at once, and after a while I didn’t need these strategies anymore, although I sometimes go back to them when necessary.

I journalled all the negative thoughts I had around writing and try to reason them away, using arguments I knew in my heart were true. (The last part is the crux.) Imagine being supportive to a writer friend with crippling insecurities, only the friend is you.

Not setting any goals didn’t work for me—I still nurtured unwanted expectations. So I did set goals, but made them non-countable, like “have fun”, “get in the flow”, or “write”. Did I write? Yes. Success! Your brain doesn’t actually care about how high the goal is, it cares about meeting whatever goal you set.

I didn’t even track how many words I wrote. Not relevant.

I set an alarm for a short time (like 10 minutes) and forbade myself to exceed that time. The idea was that if I write until I run out of mojo, my brain learns that writing drains the mojo. If I write for 10 minutes and have fun, my brain learns that writing is fun and wants to do it again.

Reinforce the fact that writing makes you happy by rewarding your brain immediately afterwards. You know what works best for you: a walk, a golden sticker, chocolate, cuddle your dog, whatever makes you happy.

I conditioned myself to associate writing with specific stimuli: that album, that smell, that tea, that place. Any stimulus can work, so pick one you like. I consciously chose several stimuli so I could switch them up, and the conditioning stays active as long as I don’t muddle it with other associations.

Use a ritual to signal to your brain that Writing Time is about to begin to get into the zone easier and faster. I guess this is a kind of conditioning as well? Meditation, music, lighting a candle… Pick your stimulus and stick with it.

Specifically for rewiring my brain, I started a new WIP that had no emotional connotations attached to it, nor any pressure to get finished or, heaven forbid, meet quality norms. I don’t think these techniques above would have worked as well if I had applied them on writing my novel.

It wasn’t until I could confidently say I enjoyed writing again, that I could start building up a consistent habit. No more pushing myself.

I lowered my definition for success

When I say that nowadays I write every day, that’s literally it. I don’t set out to write 1,000 or 500 or 10 words every day (tried it, failed to keep up with it every time)—the only marker for success when it comes to my streak is to write at least one word, even on the days when my brain goes “naaahhh”. On those days, it suffices to send myself a text with a few keywords or a snippet. It’s not “success on a technicality (derogatory)”, because most of those snippets and ideas get used in actual stories later. And if they don’t, they don’t. It’s still writing. No writing is ever wasted.

A side note on high expectations, imposter syndrome, and perfectionism

Obviously, “Setting a ridiculously low goal” isn’t something I invented. I actually got it from those productivity books, only I never got it to work. I used to tell myself: “It’s okay if I don’t write for an hour, because my goal is to write for 20 minutes and if I happen to keep going for, say, an hour, that’s a bonus.” Right? So I set the goal for 20 minutes, wrote for 35 minutes, and instead of feeling like I exceeded my goal, I felt disappointed because apparently I was still hoping for the bonus scenario to happen. I didn’t know how to set a goal so low and believe it.

I think the trick to making it work this time lies more in the groundwork of training my brain to enjoy writing again than in the fact that my daily goal is ridiculously low. I believe I’m a writer, because I prove it to myself every day. Every success I hit reinforces the idea that I’m a writer. It’s an extra ward against imposter syndrome.

Knowing that I can still come up with a few lines of dialogue on the Really Bad Days—days when I struggle to brush my teeth, the day when I had a panic attack in the supermarket, or the day my kid got hit by a car—teaches me that I can write on the mere Bad-ish Days.

The more I do it, the more I do it

The irony is that setting a ridiculously low goal almost immediately led to writing more and more often. The most difficult step is to start a new habit. After just a few weeks, I noticed that I needed less time and energy to get into the zone. I no longer needed all the strategies I listed above.

Another perk I noticed, was an increased writing speed. After just a few months of writing every day, my average speed went from 600 words per hour to 1,500 wph, regularly exceeding 2,000 wph without any loss of quality.

Talking about quality: I could see myself becoming a better writer with every passing month. Writing better dialogue, interiority, chemistry, humour, descriptions, whatever: they all improved noticeably, and I wasn’t a bad writer to begin with.

The increased speed means I get more done with the same amount of energy spent. I used to write around 2,000-5,000 words per month, some months none at all. Nowadays I effortlessly write 30,000 words per month. I didn’t set out to write more, it’s just a nice perk.

Look, I’m not saying you should write every day if it doesn’t work for you. My point is: the more often you write, the easier it will be.

No pressure

Yes, I’m still working on my novel, but I’m not racing through it. I produce two or three chapters per month, and the rest of my time goes to short stories my brain keeps projecting on the inside of my eyelids when I’m trying to sleep. I might as well write them down, right?

These short stories started out as self-indulgence, and even now that I take them more seriously, they are still just for me. I don’t intend to ever publish them, no-one will ever read them, they can suck if they suck. The unintended consequence was that my short stories are some of my best writing, because there’s no pressure, it’s pure fun.

Does it make sense to spend, say, 90% of my output on stories no-one else will ever read? Wouldn’t it be better to spend all that creative energy and time on my novel? Well, yes. If you find the magic trick, let me know, because I haven’t found it yet. The short stories don’t cannibalize on the novel, because they require different mindsets. If I stopped writing the short stories, I wouldn’t produce more chapters. (I tried. Maybe in the future? Fingers crossed.)

Don’t wait for inspiration to hit

There’s a quote by Picasso: “Inspiration hits, but it has to find you working.” I strongly agree. Writing is not some mystical, muse-y gift, it’s a skill and inspiration does exist, but usually it’s brought on by doing the work. So just get started and inspiration will come to you.

Accountability and community

Having social factors in your toolbox is invaluable. I have an offline writing friend I take long walks with, I host a monthly writing club on Discord, and I have another group on Discord that holds me accountable every day. They all motivate me in different ways and it’s such a nice thing to share my successes with people who truly understand how hard it can be.

The productivity books taught me that if you want to make a big change in your life or attitude, surrounding yourself with people who already embody your ideal or your goal huuuugely helps. The fact that I have these productive people around me who also prioritize writing, makes it easier for me to stick to my own priorities.

Your toolbox

The idea is to have several techniques at your disposal to help you stay consistent. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket by focussing on just one technique. Keep all of them close, and if one stops working or doesn’t inspire you today, pivot and pick another one.

After a while, most “tools” run in the background once they are established. Things like surrounding myself with my writing friends, keeping up with my daily streak, and listening to the album I conditioned myself with don’t require any energy, and they still remain hugely beneficial.

Do you have any other techniques? I’d love to hear about them!

I hope this was useful. Happy writing!

[jay-avian]

While I lay in bed ailing from the after effects of an iron infusion, I would like to share this project that took me a few months (not consecutive) to do

I added the gold borders along my friend's dress. It was easy, but extremely tedious.

Anyways, I need a new project. I want to use up some of my patterned fabric before anything else, but I have a set of Mario-themed squares and some tropical print squares too. Any suggestions would be appreciated!

[jay-avian]

Domestic Pokemon Fic

1 - Blipbug

Timmy had been working on his homework all afternoon. After a week of learning multiplication tables, he still didn't get it. He sat at his desk thunking his pencil against his head. Maybe if he tapped it enough times, his brain would start working again. It didn't seem to be helping though.

"Timothy!" shouted his mother.

Timmy turned to his bedroom door. "What is it, momma?"

"Come do me a favor and get this bug out the house please!"

Timmy rushed out to the living room and saw his mother standing on the armchair. Her arms were tucked close to her body. She was holding a broom as tightly as she could. There wasn't a bug to be found on the floor near her, or anywhere on the floor for that matter.

"Where'd it go? I don't see nothing."

"I think it skittered behind the couch. I swept it away best I could, but it just came up right to me and hopped up on my broom!"

Timmy carefully tip-toed over to the couch and lowered himself to the floor. It was dark under there, but there was a small shape shivering a bunch. "Oh momma, you scared it!"

"It scared me first!" she shrieked. "It shouldn't of crawled across my feet!"

The boy thought for a moment. He got up and went to the kitchen. In the fruit bowl, there was an assortment of berries of all colors. Picking the tastiest looking one, he went back over to the couch and placed it on the floor. He layed on his stomach and waited. His mother eventually stepped down and sat in the armchair. The two of them stared at the berry for a few minutes. Then, the little bug stepped out from the shadows. It was a Blipbug! Timmy gasped and started kicking his legs in excitement. The Blipbug inched over to the berry, sniffing it first before taking a nibble.

"It's so cute!" Timmy whispered not so quietly.

"Oh no, you are not thinking about keeping that thing," his mother replied.

Timmy turned to her. "What if I just keep it in my room? I'll take good care of it, I promise!"

His mother sighed. "As long as you keep it away from me, that's fine. Just make sure to get it a little enclosure just in case too."

The boy gasped again. Turning back around, he saw the Blipbug ate quite a lot. The bug was swaying its head with as cheerful an expression a bug could have. Slowly, Timmy cupped his hands around it. The Blipbug stared at him with its big eyes. There wasn't much of an expression, just a pair of big, buggy eyes. He got up from the floor and walked the bug over to his room. He placed it on his desk next to his homework sheet.

"Alright, Mr. Buggy," the boy said as he sat down. "We're going to be doing multiplication tables." The Blipbug tilted its head as he talked. Timmy pointed to the top of the paper with his pencil. "See here? This is the example it gives. 3 × 2 equals 6. Now, there are little blocks on the paper to how many each number is."

As he talked, his older sister leaned in from the hallway. "Are you seriously teaching that thing math?"

"Hey, you never know," Timmy said. "I mean look at it, it's got a bowtie and everything. It must be smart."

"Tim, it's a bug Pokemon. First phase, too. There's no way that thing knows much of anything."

Meanwhile, the Blipbug was studying the tables carefully. It looked around the desk and found a broken piece of pencil lead. It grabbed the lead with its tiny legs.

"Just because it's a bug." Timmy said, "don't mean it can't know things. It knows how to jump on momma's broom."

"Yeah, I heard…"

The siblings then heard a faint, whistling sound coming from the desk. They looked to find the Blipbug jumping on the page. It had written some numbers next to one of the problems. "See?" Timmy exclaimed. "It does know things!"

His sister walked in and peered over the desk. She examined the math problem, then stared in disbelief. "Oh Arceus, there's no way it got it right…" she muttered.

Timmy picked up the Blipbug with adoration. "Professor Buggy."

[jay-avian]

Thinking about writing a fanfic series about domestic Pokemon because I think that concept is just so cool and Pokemon in general are so unique and special and I could gush about it forever but anyways. Gonna try to figure out some sort of plot for it and update y'all on it.

Was thinking maybe from the POV of this rescue center, or a breeder/pet store owner. OR maybe short stories about a day in the life of an owner (not trainer) and their Pokemon. No matter what, I think it'd be one chapter per Pokemon maybe? Though having some interactions between species would be interesting too. Will definitely be posting on my sideblog that I never use.

I'm also hoping this will help me find some structure in my day-to-day (life stuff happened and I'm in this weird limbo, but that's okay, I'm figuring stuff out kinda..) But yeah, hoping I can create a consistent schedule somehow. Wish me luck gang! (And prayers if you believe in that)

[jay-avian]

I need some opinions for a moment: if you wanted a ren fair outfit, cosplay piece, or just some clothing in general that had custom embroidery, which would you rather do? (Thinking about making a business out of this, but idk what the people want)

[jay-avian]

I don't know why Coconut came into my head first. My next thoughts were Oreo (basic I know), Biscuit, Freddie, or Michael. No, I don't know where those names came from. Someone with better name ideas please help

Guys idk what to name my son does anyone have suggestions he’s the best boy ever

[jay-avian]

I'd like to think this is what The Wastes looked like in Howl's Moving Castle. Or at least as you moved closer to the border, anyway

[jay-avian]

I need some opinions for a moment: if you wanted a ren fair outfit, cosplay piece, or just some clothing in general that had custom embroidery, which would you rather do? (Thinking about making a business out of this, but idk what the people want)