julyshewrites

[julyshewrites]

What makes a love story really great? Here’s what I’ve learned so far...

It’s all in the Proof of Love!

I’ve been really diving more into studying the structure of stories, especially love stories. It’s my favorite genre – not just as a stand alone, but because you see it paired with other genres all the time. My favorite story guru, Steven Pressfield’s editor Shawn Coyne (author of The Story Grid), says that if you had to pick one genre to learn how to write, choose Romance, for this exact reason. Romance is not limited to the women’s section in the bookstore. Romance is EVERYWHERE.

So… what makes a love story so good that it fills your daydreams, puts your heart to flutter, or as we call it, gives us “the feels”?

Well, to start, a love story typically has 3 pillars:

1- The Lovers Meet (Inciting Incident of your plot) 2- The Lovers Breakup (Midpoint) 3- The Lovers Reunite (Resolution)

Sounds simple, but I’ve read (and written) plenty of romances that follow these pillars, yet still fall short of being anything close to a good love story. They feel cliche and melodramatic.

Love stories like these fall flat because they lack a crucial element in between the the breakup and the ending that if nailed right, drives that cupid’s arrow right in our heart and gives us the satisfaction we crave.

This crucial element is called the Proof of Love scene.

Really then, when writing your story, you should have 4 elements:

1- The Lovers Meet (Inciting Incident) 2- The Lovers Breakup (Midpoint) 3- Proof of Love (Climax) 4- The Lovers Reunite (Resolution)

What then is a “Proof of Love” scene?

Well, it is simply what it says – it’s when one of the lovers proves their love to the other. When we think of typical romances, it’s the “run through the airport to profess your love” scene. But those can be cliche, right? 

The romances that really get us are the ones that have a proof of love that is so powerful, we know that the couple is truly, deeply in love and committed. 

I think of two examples. First, the classic Pride and Prejudice. The ultimate proof of love is when Elizabeth finds out that Mr. Darcy orchestrated her sister’s marriage to his enemy, and by doing so rescues Elizabeth (and her family) from being tainted by the scandal her sister created by running away with a rogue. There were other things Mr. Darcy did along the way that started to soften Elizabeth towards him (which I’ll discuss here later), but that event was the clincher – where she realizes that Mr. Darcy absolutely loves her, and she loves him just as much.

Another example is from The Notebook. It’s at the end, where we see that Noah tells Allie their love story day after day, year after year, only to gain a few seconds of her remembering him. Even when she forgets again and pushes him away, he is there by her side. We understand that no matter how many times Allie forgets Noah, he will never forget, and will return the next day and tell her the story again, even till the very end of their lives. Sniff

Why are these proof of loves scenes so powerful? How can we emulate them?

In order to have a powerful proof of love scene there are a couple ingredients you need:

1- A breakup scene where it’s almost impossible for the lovers to reunite 2- A sacrifice made without any expectation of return of affection

Let’s talk about the second ingredient first – SACRIFICE. 

Loving someone without any expectation is Unconditional Love.

This is someone loving us because they love us, without any selfish motives. It is what we all truly crave in life, and why love stories are so powerful. Don’t we all just wish that someone would see us and love us for who we are? That we don’t have to do anything to be worthy of that love other than being our true selves, flaws and all?

This is what Darcy does for Elizabeth. He really doesn’t think that Elizabeth will ever talk to him again, much less like him, but he goes out of his way to help her. He does it at the cost of his dignity, having to work with his enemy Mr. Wickham, whom he hoped to never have to deal with in his life ever again. He bends over backwards to fix the situation. And, he does all of it as anonymously as he can, making Elizabeth’s uncle take the credit, and asking that her aunt and uncle keep his role from Elizabeth. Now, that is proof of love!

Noah’s proof of love to Allie, although different in its expression, still has that same ingredient of sacrifice without expectation. He has gone to live with her in the nursing home, even though he is perfectly able to take care of himself. He doesn’t know when, or if, Allie will ever remember him. Now, he has hope, but that is different from expectation. Hope is still unsure. Expectation is demanding. But for Noah, no matter if Allie remembers him or not, he shows his children (and us), that that doesn’t matter. He will be by her side regardless. He loves her so much, and she doesn’t even remember him. What a powerful statement about unconditional love!

Now, let’s go back to the first ingredient – the BREAKUP!

No proof of love scene can work without first having a gut-wrenching, how-will-they-ever-get-back-together breakup scene.

The lovers must breakup, and not just temporarily. They must be so broken up that we can’t see how they could possibly repair their relationship and reunite.

This is a hard one, and also something that we as writers often don’t push far enough (myself included!). Here are some ways the breakup scene falls flat:

– The lovers breakup, but only for a short time (I’m looking at you 50 Shades of Gray/50 Shades Darker – 3 days?? Really??).  – Or they break up, but it’s all just a simple misunderstanding, that can be solved with a conversation. This one can work when that misunderstanding is done like in Pride and Prejudice (I’ll talk more on that in a second), but often its done where the misunderstanding is pretty simple.  – Or, they break up because of circumstances, but those circumstances are easily overcome. 

These are just a few examples, but you have probably seen more yourself. There’s just that meh feeling when it comes to the breakup. 

In other words, you really can’t go half-ass on your breakup.

Let’s talk about the Pride and Prejudice breakup. Their’s is a doozy. Their’s is based on misunderstanding, but oh what misunderstandings abound! Their misunderstandings stem from deep personal flaws, rooted also in their positions in society. Their misunderstandings comes from being on two complete sides of the spectrum. Plus, their personal flaws prevent them from even wanting to understand the other side and thinking they each are 100% right in their own views. We can almost see this clash coming, because we know they have been building their own views all along, so that argument they have is the culmination for all that. It’s not just that they’ve gotten along the whole time, and one simple situation created a misunderstanding that can easily be cleared up with a conversation. No, this misunderstanding is rooted deep in their souls.

And when they have their blow-up argument, Darcy has a lot to account for – treating Elizabeth and all her friends and family like dirt and even preventing her sister from marrying someone she loves because he feels it’s beneath his friend. What a jerk! I wouldn’t want to marry him either. Of course, Elizabeth is no angel herself. Although her family’s poor, it’s not that so much that as their terrible behavior in public, and Elizabeth’s fairly blind eye to admitting it. It’s her own haughtiness at thinking that she’s better than those snobby rich people, and her tendency to also judge people right away. With all that between them, and now their real feelings out in the open to each other, how on earth will they overcome that?

Well, they do, slowly but surely, but it takes some real work. Darcy’s proof of love culminates in the service he does to help Elizabeth’s sister marry Wickham, but it begins to build by the other changes he makes. Darcy tries to show he’s really a nice guy. Not just fake show it, but really be it. He even helps Jane get back with Bingley, and admits he was wrong. The proof of his love is in the pudding of action (and remember actions develop character).

The Notebook is a little trickier. We have a really good breakup scene in the middle of the movie (can you figure out why it’s a powerful breakup?). But, we also have that true, how-will-they-ever-get-back-together scene coupled with the proof of love. It’s because Allie has Alzheimers. How do you overcome that? You can’t, really. The only way Noah can try is to be a consistent presence in Allie’s life, and the last comfort of being in each other’s arms as they die. Okay, here’s my heart now. <X3 ;;o;;

So, to make your love story really great, let’s focus on these 3 pillars instead:

1- The Lovers Meet 2- The Lovers Breakup (and make it a good one!) 3- The Proof of Love (knowing the Lovers Reunite will fall naturally out of that)

If you can nail those you’ll be giving your readers “the feels” right and left! It’s something I’m slowly but surely working on myself. 

Whew! So that’s a lot to cover I know, but my hope is that by diving deep into these concepts our stories will be better for it. Romance it up!

[julyshewrites]

Midpoint vs. All is Lost vs. Dark Night of the Soul — beats of story

As I’ve been studying the structure of story I’ve really been struggling with each of these concepts.

Here’s what I’ve learned.

Midpoint

**The actual middle of the story. **Everything to this point has been a bit out of the protagonist’s control. They’ve had things thrown at them, and it’s like they’ve just been trying not to get pounded by the bullets of the plot. 

Then the midpoint happens. It’s sometimes called the Mirror Moment. The point of reflection. Of realization. 

It can be a positive realization, such as in Bridget Jones Diary, when she decides to get her life together and quit her job, leave Daniel Cleaver for good, and do better. 

It can also be a negative realization, like in War for the Planet of the Apes, when Ceasar realizes his actions have caused his entire ape tribe to be captured. (Go ahead, watch the movie, put your cursor directly on the center mark -- he literally says, “What have I done?”) 

Either way, it is when the protagonist realizes that something must change in order to overcome the villain (internal or external), but they haven’t done anything other than have that realization. No changes have been made yet. 

But the protagonist is a bit more in control. They go from reacting to acting.

They are trying. It’s messy. It’s probably futile. It probably will overwhelm them. That leads to the ALL IS LOST moment.

All Is Lost

Here is where all the protagonist’s hard work is thrown for the ultimate loop.

It’s when the villain almost overtakes the protagonist. 

It’s the moment of hopelessness. 

And if forces the protagonist to make a choice. This moment of reflection is the DARK NIGHT OF THE SOUL.

Dark Night of the Soul

This moment results from the All is Lost moment. It is the moment that the protagonist must decide, _Do I give up in defeat? _or Do I rise up and make the changes necessary to triumph?

This is the moment that the character arc culminates in (or if it’s a plot-driven story, like an action story, it’s the culmination of the plot actions). This is where everything we’ve been reading leads to. 

What will the decision be? Everything after this point is a result of that decision.

Alrighty, I hope that helps. I’m still figuring all of this out. Keep learning and writing all!

[julyshewrites]

Behind the scenes, Lovefools Chapter 14 — All is Lost (spoilers)

What a wild ride Chapter 14 was! (Read it here.) 

Okay, let’s all take a breath together... That’s it. We are all going to make it.

I have to say, writing is a funny thing sometimes. It’s still new to me, learning how to write a full-length story like this. Especially trying to make a story that works, and that hits all the right beats. That has a beginning, middle, and end. When I write each chapter I focus on the scene itself. Does it move forward, does it show a change in the characters? What comes up that forces them to make decisions? How is it moving the story forward instead of just being an event that happens without any consequences?

But all of this analytical stuff can go out the window when the muse hits. It’s then that I find that characters say things I didn’t expect. 

For this story, in particular, Yuri and JJ seem to be telling me this story instead of the other way around. There are lots of really fun, sexy, moving Pliroy stories out there. I love reading this ship. But... this is the story they want me to tell.

So... I had a chapter written. It was pretty much Yuri’s fantasy. He wanted to go have coffee with JJ. It progressed to him reaching -- literally -- for JJ and holding his hand. He asked JJ to dinner. JJ said yes.

Yuri had a scene intention. 

He knew, at least a little, of how he wanted that coffee date to go. But what moves a story forward? What forces a character to make decisions (which shows their “character”)? And what forces a character to make changes?

Complications. 

And JJ is just one big complication.

As we’ve all seen throughout this story, he does things, says things that are always throwing Yuri (and let’s face it, all of us) for a loop. That’s how it goes with people though, right? They never act how we expect them to.

So, instead of going along with this little fantasy date, JJ’s voice came to me and confessed he was in love with Yuri. 

And JJ being JJ, he just dropped that bomb right before I had to go to work, so I couldn’t really deal with it. 

I was pretty mad at him because I had to change the scene completely.

Now I had to pick up the pieces of that truth bomb. 

How was I going to do that?

Other than really working on creating scenes that work, my main focus is on JJ’s and Yuri’s essential actions. That is, how would they naturally act and react. This stems from some of their emotional wounds that I’m centering their character arcs around. 

Yuri’s emotional wound is fear of abandonment. He thinks that everyone will just leave him, and it is why he’s been clingy with Beka and even JJ -- refusing to abandon JJ. On the flip side, it’s also why he has such a prickly exterior. Everyone will eventually leave me, so if I make it hard to be around I’m just proving I’m right. Everyone leaves me.

This is the story he tells himself subconsciously, and he unconsciously creates circumstances in his life that reaffirm this belief. Even when those things work against what he thinks he wants. 

But, Yuri is starting to wake up to that behavioral pattern in himself. In Chapter 10, Understanding he realized “It’s me. I’m the one that drives people away.” This is the first step of change -- we have to be made aware of what needs to change. To change our story. To take ahold of our destiny.

Then we have JJ. JJ is really struggling with being traumatized by the stalker. He’s very skittish about opening up. And so he stays with someone who is not good for him, but familiar. It’s frustrating as hell to watch, but we’ve all known people who do that, don’t we?

This is also because JJ is very insecure underneath the cocky “JJ Style” attitude. We saw that in the show, when he messes up, but the fans still cheer him on. He says, “I don’t deserve your applause.” So additionally, he doesn’t think that he deserves Yuri’s love, and doesn’t really believe that Yuri could ever love him. Which means that his assumptions are just reflecting what he believes about himself. He can’t see another perspective. This is his story he tells himself, just like Yuri has his story. The difference is that JJ hasn’t woken up to that fact that he is creating this story by his own subconscious behavior.

So... we saw all that clashing in this chapter. JJ confessing his love, but in a way that dismissed Yuri’s feelings. And Yuri feeling completely abandoned by JJ, even though he’s been loyal to his feelings for JJ all this time.

Of course, Yuri has been trying to make changes, to grow, to overcome this fear he has. It hasn’t been easy for him, and he’s stumbling through it, but here he has his ALL IS LOST moment. He realizes that JJ just isn’t in the emotional space to have a relationship with him. This culminates in a quick DARK NIGHT OF THE SOUL moment, where he decides that he needs to let go of trying to make JJ be with him and move on. 

(For more about the difference between the ALL IS LOST and the DARK NIGHT OF THE SOUL moments, see my post here.)

(This is also the breakup I talked about in another post. We really don’t see how the couple will get back together. And there has to be a breakup to set up a Proof of Love moment.)

The good thing though now that Yuri has had his AIL moment and DNOTS moment, we will see that the changes he’s been trying to make really become an integrated part of himself. It’s going to be good, I promise!

Now, JJ hasn’t had his AIL moment yet, which means he hasn’t had his DNOTS, which means he’s not ready to make a real change. Yuri made a choice to really change at this point, but JJ hasn’t. That’s why they can’t be together yet. And both parties have to make changes in a Love Story in order for them to really, truly, be together. (But JJ’s AIL moment is just on the horizon.)

Okay, so that’s all my rambling about my process behind this chapter. It will get better I promise! Hang in there with me!!!

[julyshewrites]

So here's a little question from a newbie tumblr writer... what IS a writblr anyway? I read your great post about the pros and cons of one, but am still learning about how to connect and use tumblr as a writer. Thx!

Ok, first off, welcome!

A writeblr is a blog that you talk about your writing stuff on. Sometimes also use their writeblr as a personal blog, but personally I prefer to follow writeblrs that are just about writing, because that’s the content I want to see on my dash! Some people also make a sideblog as a writeblr, but I suggest making a main blog because you can follow other writers and have them find you more easily!

On a writeblr, I think it’s important to have certain things:

An about you page! I don’t want to follow some nameless entity.

INFO ABOUT YOUR WIPS. (Aka works-in-progess, aka whatever you’re writing right now!) This is so, so important. You’ll see that on my blog (at least on desktop — I need to work on my mobile navigation), I have three main wips right on my sidebar! And from there you can go to full pages, tags, etc.

Links to where I can find your writing!

Here are some of the things you can reasonably expect to see on a writeblr:

Writing!

Posts about your writing

Posts about writing in general

Funny writing memes

Tag games

Writing ask games

Moodboards

Playlists

Really, all sorts of fun writing-related things! You can scroll through my blog to get a better idea, or look at some other writeblrs, like the lovely people I reblog from frequently! And if you have any questions (how does one make a moodboard, what’s a tag game, etc), feel free to shoot me an ask or a message ;) Good luck!

[julyshewrites]

theAwkwardYeti.com

[julyshewrites]

Behind the scenes of Lovefools, Chapter 7 — “The Breakup” (spoilers)

Read the chapter here.

Well folks, I thought that chapter 6 contained the midpoint of my story, but surprise! Nope, it’s in this chapter. 

Last chapter I thought that Yuri had his “Mirror Moment” (based on the book Write Your Novel from the Middle, by James Scott Bell), where Yuri realizes that he likes JJ. Since JJ had completely different ideas on what his character was feeling, however, Yuri’s “Mirror Moment” ended up being his question to Yuuri -- “Why does no one want to be with me?” But more on that in a bit.

JJ!!! Why oh why, JJ? Why did you do this to Yuri???

Okay, here’s the deal. JJ for all his bravado is really insecure underneath. And he really, REALLY likes Yuri. Has for years. Now that Yuri is actually within his reach though? It freaks him the hell out, and subconsciously he believes, “Why would Yuri ever like me?” So, he thinks inevitably Yuri will break up with him. And subconsciously, JJ thinks best to do it first, before he really gets his heart involved in the one person he wants more than anything to be involved with. 

Sometimes when we get close to achieving our heart’s desire, fear completely takes over and sabotages it for us. I know I’ve had this happen more than just a few times, and with relationships as well. I feel for JJ in this chapter, because I’ve been him. 

Funny thing is, I’ve also been Yuri — a relationship that seems to be moving along swimmingly suddenly stops and the other person out of the blue breaks up. Over time I’ve learned that these sudden shifts have much more to do with things the other person is dealing with, than with anything I specifically.

A note on Victor: I feel that by this time, Victor has really grown up and matured. It’s been seven years, so he’s in his thirties now. He’s been married and a coach for that time, and has learned a lot. He’s learned a lot through his relationship with Yuuri. He is a better coach — enough so that even Yakov trusted him to continue with Yuri’s training. And despite it all, Yuri really looks up to him.

Back to Yuri’s “Mirror Moment” — this is the point of self-reflection, even if it’s subconscious. It’s here where transformation can really begin. Before Yuri (the protagonist) has just been tossed about by circumstance. But now? Now he can make some choices to direct his journey. But there’s still a lot of growth that needs to happen, and he will not want to make all the changes he should because change is still uncomfortable.

Now moving forward, Yuri will need to figure out what to do with himself and with JJ. How do you support and show you care when the other person doesn’t even give you a chance? Do you move on? Do you push your way into their life anyway? These are the things that Yuri needs to discover.

With that said, I’m working now on the next chapter, so stay tuned! And let me know what you thought of this chapter, and of this behind the scenes. The more feedback I get from all you lovely readers just helps me write better stories for you!

[julyshewrites]

[julyshewrites]

fanfic writer moods

the thrill of posting something

you’ve got comments emails

existential crisis’s over getting views but no feedback

24 hour high of getting a long ass comment

the inclination to Stop

the addiction to keep going overtaking that

‘when’s the next update?’ lol, wish I knew friend

[julyshewrites]

Writing is the only thing that when I do it, I don’t feel I should be doing something else.

Gloria Steinem (via bucketsiler)

[julyshewrites]

No need to carry that around.

The Awkward Yeti

[julyshewrites]

Plot vs Character — which should I focus on??

How about BOTH!

For years I’ve struggled the same as many writers with this question. Luckily, I came across a book (which also has an accompanying podcast) called Story Grid, that helped me understand I didn’t have to choose. I could do both!

But how on Earth can I do both? I hear you ask me through your screen. 

It really comes down to something very simple: How your characters react to the plot reveals their true nature. 

In essence, plot develops character.

We, as people think we know what type of person we are. And we may, to a point. But, but, it is our ACTIONS that show others and ourselves our true nature. Life happens. We may say we value our friends and family above all others, but when we work late instead of spending time with them, we really show what we value.

Think of Harry Potter. In the entire series, there is an overarching story, and we all want to know what happens next. But at the same time, we also really get to know Harry as a person in the story just as much. He’s proud, and a bit impetuous. Loyal, and brave. He has a bit of a temper, but tries his best. He feels isolated, and doesn’t always let people help him. He has a sense of humor. 

But we didn’t learn that because JK Rowling told us. “Harry was the type of friend who was loyal.” “Harry sometimes could get so mad, but deep down it was because he was lonely.” No, she showed us. We saw when Harry stood up for unpopular Ron against Draco and his cronies. We saw the times Harry acted before thinking, especially with Voldemort, and how others had to come to his aid. We saw when he and Ron would get into fights. 

Here’s the thing. Sometimes characters influence plot as well.

Again, back to Harry Potter. How many times did Harry’s actions create consequences in the plot? More than a few, that’s for sure. And those consequences led Harry to react again, creating new consequences and so forth.

Sometimes things in life (or your plot) happen that the character can’t control. But more often than not, we (and your characters) create much of the good and bad things that happen in our lives.

Now, I talk a good game here, but I’m still learning this as well. In my latest chapter of my Yuri!!! On Ice fanfic I’m writing, I’m trying to show more of Yuuri’s and Victor’s relationship. In this chapter I used the announcement of Yuuri’s skating season to act as a catalyst for some tensions. It’s far from perfect, but using plot points to help show these characters’ true natures, and then using plot to show how those natures change, helps me to create characters that I care about, along with wondering what will happen next in the plot.

So give it a try! See if you can get deeper into revealing your characters as three-dimensional people by using your plot as a tool.

Check out my Dreams On Ice chapter here.

[julyshewrites]

*Very* helpful resource! hehe!

[julyshewrites]

Artists, don’t sell yourself short (from an art director)

To all you wonderful artists and writers and creators out there, I’m an Art Director that has worked in advertising and marketing for over 20 years. Will you let me tell you a few things?

Your art is worth what you charge. In fact, it’s probably worth more.

Your time is valuable. Projects take time and those who don’t get that or think you can just “whip something up” are not your clients.

They will never understand the value of art. Don’t waste your time trying to convince them.

Art is NOT an exchange of time for money. It is the creation of the idea and the skills to execute it. That is why people buy art.

You are not a window water. You are an artist.

If someone thinks ideas and skills just happen, then they can try creating something on their own.

People who truly value your art will pay you what it is worth. Please believe that.

Trust that those who value art will find you. PLEASE, believe your work has worth and your efforts are valuable. You are all amazing.

[julyshewrites]

deep sigh

[julyshewrites]

Not sure how to move your scene forward? I struggle too!

So, try setting an intention!

Now, I have a hard time from keeping my scenes from meandering. I know I want certain things/events to happen in my plot. I also want to show character development. But how can I really keep a scene on track? How do I keep it from wandering (and my readers from wandering as well)?

The best way I’ve found so far is to answer this question:

What is my character’s intention for this scene? What do they want to have happen?

This leads to some really great character and plot development, because it really gets them interacting with each other. Perhaps events are happening in your plot that you want. But what about your character? What do they want? 

How do you find that out? Usually, what your character wants has to do with the previous scene. What happened to your character in that scene? Now that those events took place, what do they want going forward?

Here’s a tip: Most characters want the same thing, no matter the story, at least in the first half. Really?? Oh, yes…

Your characters DO NOT want to change. In fact, they want everything to go back to the way it was, and they are trying everything in their power to achieve that. They are FIGHTING the plot.

For example, in the first book/movie of the LOTR, Fellowship of the Rings, for the beginning half of the story, Frodo does everything in his power to get that damn ring to the Elf city of Rivendale. But he’s only doing it for one reason. So he can just drop it off so someone else can deal with it, so he can go home. And  that’s really his intention throughout the entire trilogy. It’s not until the end that he realizes how much the journey changed him – even when he does go back home. He understands he can never really go back.

In The Hunger Games too, everything Katniss does to try to win the games is to try to go back. Even after she wins the games, she just wants everything to go back to normal. But just like Frodo, she eventually realizes she can’t. 

(And that point is when your characters make their true core change, but more on that another time!)

For me, this is really what I’m working on right now. I just wrote a scene in my fanfic where a pretty big rift happened with my main characters, and I’ve been struggling to know how to transition to the next major plot event. But really, I have the answer – my main character just wants things to go back to normal between him and the other character. Back to the rapport they had before. 

So if you’re stuck like me, try looking at what your character’s want (to go back to the way things were), and then see the actions they take to try to achieve that.

[julyshewrites]

The best words you will ever write … are hiding behind crappy words you haven’t written yet.

Writing Excuses Podcast (Season 12, Episode 44)

[julyshewrites]

Soooo, I’ve been reading a lot of great fanfics and I’m really feeling like this today. I know I’m at the beginning of my writing journey, so I can’t compare myself to those who’ve been writing longer than me. But that doesn’t mean I don’t get discouraged just the same.

The only way I know how to combat this feeling though is to just keep going. Not to give up, but to realize, yeah, I am jealous – but really I can flip it to being inspired. I aspire to be like those writers.

If any of you feel this way too, down in the trenches trying to make a go of our dreams – we can do it! Just keep practicing! Keep writing! I went through this with learning to design and play piano. It sucks at first, and you feel like you suck too, but we can’t equate the rough process of learning with our worth as aspiring creatives.

We will improve if we just continue through the rough and tumble!