loststoic

[loststoic]

Why We Can't Unlove

You left me knowing that it would hurt. I lived every day fighting the thought of killing myself, trying to answer the questions which have no answers. I lived every day carrying the insecurity, pain, regret, grief, and remorse for a long time. I still carry some of it. But even though I was going through all of this, I chose to love you. So I think that's why I would cut my hands if they ever try to reach you.

[loststoic]

Mujhe to nahi mila mauka,

Tumhari khushiyon mein tumhare saath jeene ka

Tumhare acchhe samay mein tumhare paas hone ka

Mujhe to nahi mila mauka,

Sabke saamne tumhari tafseeron par like comment karne ka

Tumhare unchaaiyon par hote hue tumhe apna bulaane ka

Maine to dekhi hain wo raatein

Jinmein roi ho tum aur thaama hai maine tumhe

Har ek baar, har ek din

Main to saath tha tumhara jab duniya ne daraaya tha tumhe

Main to lata tha tofey tumhare chehre ki muskaan ke liye

Aaj sabki ho tum, par mujhe to nahi mila mauka tumhe apna kehne ka

Main to kho gaya samay ki dararon mein

Aanjan sa, jaise aaya tha, jaise saalon bitaaye tumhare saath

Main to kho gaya usi gumnami mein

Mere hisse ka haq to kisi aur ko mila

Mujhe to nahi mila mauka

[loststoic]

Maybe that's what love is all about

When I was figuring things out, I kept questioning my feelings, but every time, I realized my love for you was the real deal. It wasn't about flashy stuff or just some fleeting desire-it was more.

I loved the way you looked at me, the way you walked and talked, even the sleepy and sleeping looks. I wanted to be your go-to person, your shoulder to lean on, especially when you weren't feeling great.

Cooking for you wasn't just about food; it filled me up too.

Buying stuff you liked to eat felt like hitting the jackpot because it gave me everything I didn't know I needed. But now, when there's this void, I try to fill it with random things, and they just don't cut it. I aimed to be your protector, always there when you needed me.

I did my best to create a safe spot for you, to be present wherever you needed me.

You were my world my everything. I didn't want to know anything beyond you. Your smile was my daily pick-me-up, and just having you around was like being surrounded by flowers.

I didn't want much but just to be there. But life threw a curveball, and you left. Surprisingly, I'm not bitter about it. You're still with me in a weird way, even though you're not physically here. Maybe that's what love's all about, huh? .

[loststoic]

What I have seen is that there is a lot to explore! A whole big world to look into. But many of us are occupied by very mere things, very little, some of the common things, which everyone has, we have too. But we should really look beyond things. There's a lot to know, on the internet and in the real world; you just have to look where no one else is looking.

[loststoic]

“Very little is needed to make a happy life: it is all within yourself in your way of thinking.”

— Marcus Aurelius