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Abortion & Poverty

Whatever else abortion may be, it's not "simple." There's nothing simple about it. Not the act, nor why it happens. I find both "pro-life" and "pro-choice" to be oversimplified platforms.

A data-driven approach shows sex-ed, low cost birth control, & the economic empowerment of women are the best ways to lower abortion rates. 75% of abortions occur due to economic concerns. Low-income single women face a perceived choice: abort or starve. Poverty drives abortion.

Want to protect a women's rights and the unborn? Attack poverty. Make it a national concern. We can piddle around in philosophic morality, or we can be pragmatic and look at data. That data is damning: poor women have no choice.

You aren't pro-choice unless you address poverty. And you aren't pro-life unless you address poverty.

I'm convinced our two parties want this issue to remain in tension to manipulate voting blocks. If we actually care about the rights of women and the unborn, we'd wage a national war on poverty.

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Trust That I AM; Be Not Afraid

In Matthew 14, Jesus says this:

"But straightway Jesus spoke unto them, saying, Trust that I AM; be not afraid."

I wonder if lately we're all too afraid.

We're afraid that God as abandoned America because same sex marriage is the law of the land, or we're afraid that half the country is never going to "get it."

We're afraid because black churches keep burning, and black people keep dying at the hands of our police. Or, we're afraid that our police will fall victim to hate crimes in a pressure cooker race culture.

We're afraid of climate change, or we're afraid the lie of climate change will crush a fragile economy. We're afraid that our military actions abroad will come home to hurt us, or that we're weakening our military too much for it to handle the threats to our security.

Fear. It's the most powerful human emotion. When fear lights up in our brains, our ability to reason or love goes out the window. It's the great motivator. Our leaders know this, and so does our media. Fear fills voting booths, sells newspapers and 24-hour cable news. Fear deepens divisions by sewing mistrust. Fear says it's black or white, gay or straight, us or them.

But Jesus, the broken God, says do not be afraid. Trust that I AM.

Do we trust that? Are we willing to cast of fear, to lay down our protective armor, and reach out to the world in love?

That is the road to healing. That is the work of the cross: to speak for the voiceless, to stand for the broken, to find strength in weakness.

Whenever I am afraid, I remind myself that I am not God. I remember I don't have all the answers.

When that makes me feel powerless, I remember that I can love my God and my neighbor today, right now. I remember that I have been invited to participate in the healing of this world.

And I am not afraid anymore.

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Where I Find God

"God has to be more to you than just where science has yet to tread."  -- Neil DeGrasse Tyson

I find God in the unknown and the known, in the far and the near, in today and tomorrow, and yesterday as well. I find God in physics and in scripture, and at the end of the day, when my daughters climb up into my lap. God is everywhere I look: up in the night sky and the noonday sun; in the wind that caresses the trees, and all that teeming life, competing to survive. Most remarkable, I find God when I look into my own heart; in the miraculous spark that makes me move and breathe and wonder how I can.

photo credit: Soul's Window via photopin (license)

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God has to be more to you than just where science has yet to tread.

Neil DeGrasse Tyson

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This Pew Forum survey is setting my inbox on fire, so a few thoughts: This data validates predictions by many social scientists, namely that the decline of organized religion in America is a long term trend. That's not new. Likewise, social scientists have been predicting for a few years that the conservative and evangelical congregations would not continue to grow, and will start to face declines like those seen in the mainline and Catholic churches. This years data is potentially the beginning of very worrying trends for Evangelicals–including non-denominational churches. The social stigma against secularism or personal spirituality is falling away, even in the Southeast. This takes away some of the most toxic, abusive levers of religion to manipulate people. That's a good thing. It's getting very difficult to use social pressures to bully people into religion. This trend leads to a lot of anxiety in the Church. Christianity's decline is most precipitous among the young, and so there is a dialog happening across denominations about how to reach young people. Some say it's an embrace of liturgy, and the ancient mystery of faith. Others say it's a return to the Bible's authority, and the fundamentals of faith. Still others say that the only way to reach young people is social action and real work in the world. They are all wrong. There is no one way to reach Millennials. Stop trying to find one. Some Millennials grew up in Evangelical traditions, but now find solace in Eucharist and liturgy after a season of deconstruction. Other Millennials find certainty and structure in the Evangelical tradition that was missing in the faith of their childhood. Still others meet Jesus through Matthew 25. Theirs is a gospel of action, of sick visited and hungry fed. Some are all of the above, or something else entirely. Some are done, and they don't want to talk about it. The future of the church is not a better marketing plan, or a move toward liturgical worship, or a better presentation of the plan of salvation. The future of the church is people finding a new life each day in Jesus. I reach thousands of millennials, but it's not because I have answers, or the best methods. It's because I'm honest about my attempts to walk the road of my teacher, and how I stumble along the way. Many are attracted to that. Of course, others millennials think I'm nuts, and go to a big Evangelical church in town. They find Christ there. My smaller, woman-pastored congregation would seem like an alien landscape to them. But both are growing in a time when Christianity in the country is not. What they have in common is an honest approach; a comfortability with who they are and who they are not. Neither of these communities can reach everyone. If you want to save the church, let your faith make you a new person each day. Love, forgive, bless, and serve. Do those things that against which there are no laws. And don't worry. As my friend Rachel says, God is in the resurrection business.

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When the Past Hurts

I was sitting in therapy once and found something in my soul I never knew was there. It was as if I was taking a guest on a tour of my home and noticed a door in the hallway I'd never seen before–it was that unexpected. It was a door that I wouldn't be able to open for weeks.

It wasn't that long ago. I was still a part of the Baptist church, but I'd become a black sheep for talking about marriage equality and evolution. It felt like getting divorced–one of the most painful things I'd ever endured. So, I started going to see a therapist once a week.

We were talking about my childhood–my therapist insisted on it. Therapists are always getting you to talk about parts of your life you don't want to talk about. The funny thing is I could talk about what happened when I was a kid, and I could explain what other kids had done to me when I was bullied so much. It didn't bother me, and I told my therapist that I was over all that.

But then she asked me how I felt when those things happened to me. She asked me how I felt when kids would throw softballs at me, or push me over when we were running laps.

I don't want to sound melodramatic, but it was that moment that I saw the unexpected door for the first time. And when I touched the doorknob, it scalded me. It was if that once unseen door was the Gates of Hell itself, and evil emanated from it–an oppressive, terrifying radiation that is not seen, but felt.

I couldn't tell my therapist how I felt. Even thinking about it made my heart pound like a bass drum, while filling me with some awful terror. It confused and disoriented me.

I mean, here I was in a safe place and I was terrified just because a kind, smart woman asked me how I felt about something that happened decades ago. It split my consciousness for a few seconds–part of me was afraid, and part of me was wearing a lab coat, studying that fear.

That was a rough day. I was shaken for the rest of the afternoon, uncomfortable in my own thoughts. Just as uneasy as I'd be at home with a mysterious door to Hell, a few feet from my favorite couch.

Week after week, my therapist would keep guiding me toward that door. I told her why I wasn't able to cry, about how I'd learned to make myself not cry via biofeedback so well that it was automatic these days. I'd become a person who could sob once, before I'd reflexively relax my core muscles and slow my breathing.

And then, one week, my friend Bradley asked me what I would tell the 7 year old me if he was sitting across from me, and the door opened.

A river of grief came out. Grief is a briny river for sure, but somehow it leaves you feeling clean.

After that, I could cry in therapy. We had to talk about some of my childhood feelings over and over. I still felt panicky and afraid when we'd move through what it was like to be a fat, ginger kid who loved computers and science.

The craziest thing was that the more I opened that door, the less it scared me. And each time, the flow of grief was a little smaller, until at last it was just another door.

Don't get me wrong, that's not the part of my soul where I want to watch TV or have a party. But, I don't mind going in there anymore, especially if I can grab a story that will help someone else face their own grief over past trauma, loss, or hurt.

Here's the thing: when you bury the pain of the past it can warp you. On the one hand, my bullies gave me a gift. I have a profound sense of independence and I'm not too worried about the approval of a crowd. On the other hand, I have an acute fear or rejection, and intense doubt when people tell me they like me.

By suppressing all those feelings of rejection from my childhood, I set the stage from some pretty toxic behaviors later in life. It's where I get my love of being in front of crowds, entertaining them, but also controlling the interaction. It also lead me to seek acceptance and validation in some unhealthy romantic relationships.

I was able to drop a lot of those behaviors and live a healthier life when I finally forgive the people who'd hurt me as a child. They were children, after all. The first step in redeeming the wounds of our past if forgiving the ones who wounded us. It's the only way forward.

But it's just the beginning of the healing process. After forgiveness comes grief. You have to mourn the loss that came from that wound. Western people have a profound talent for avoiding grief, and Americans are exceptional at it even by the standards of the West.

This is all rooted in our brains, of course. When you recall events and people from the past, different parts of your brain light up. For traumatic memories, your amygdala will get hyped up just as powerfully as if am imminent, physical threat was present. The power of the human brain in recreating the past means our painful memories have exquisite power.

Why wouldn't you bury something like that? Who would chose to wander into such pain? It's awful.

Awful, but essential. Because every time you recall a memory, your brain changes that memory a little bit. That's how conditioning works. Pavlov's insights apply to people just as much as dogs. I salivate when the microwave dings. It's positive reinforcement. But if someone hit me with a rock every time the microwave did it's thing, I'd probably break into a sweat every time someone reached for a frozen dinner. That's why grief and therapy work so well.

When we recall the painful past in as safe environment, we weaken that memories association with the parts of our brain that drive fear and anger. We rewire our brains to take the punch out of those wounds, and finally allow them to heal.

I think that's why people who've been hurt have to return to their stories over and over. They have an instinctive drive to share once they feel safe. As long as that doesn't become an obsession, it's healthy.

I've found that forgiveness and grief are helpful in living a whole, healthy life.

I'd love to hear your insights about coping with past traumas in the comments below.

photo credit: via photopin (license)

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Broken Family

I keep hearing "We are two different religions" over the LGBT debate in the church. By that standard, we're more like 40,000. We are one Church. Christ is the head. Now, we may have MPD, and our arms occasionally punch each other. Still, one body.

Christians who are against LGBT marriage are not my enemies. They are brothers and sisters, who I believe are deeply misguided. But I can't forget that I once held that view, and that it wasn't a flash of brilliance that changed my mind. Someone was patient with me.

I can both fight for the right of LGBT persons to wed, and affirm the dignity and worth of Christians who do not. If the views of others frustrate me, I find it helpful to remember I'm wrong about at least one important issue right now.

There's a secret to healthy relationships and conflict: communicate honestly, without hostility.

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The Restrained Pedophile

My email box has become a wild place, full of new, exotic creatures. This influx of new email organisms comes courtesy of my podcast, Ask Science Mike. People send me all sorts of questions, and in doing so bare their inner life to a stranger. My show is about facilitating an open, honest conversation about science, faith, and life with thousands of other people.

A lot of these questions are very similar to one another. I get over one hundred questions a week about masturbation, for example. The similarity of many questions is not monotonous. Quite the contrary–I find it comforting that some many of us share the same secret fears and Things We Want To Ask But Are Afraid.

Among the herds of similar questions though, rarer sights can be found. The Unique Questions are often startling, and one of my favorite things about the show. There is no better gift you can offer someone who loves to teach than a brand new question.

I take great joy in turning information that took me months to research into a 5 minutes answer. I take even greater joy in offering solidarity to people who think they are alone. This comes at a cost. Sometimes the questions are dark in a way I'm not prepared for.

One such question floored me on this week's show. The return email address was fake–a truly anonymous message. It read:

Hi Mike,

I was sexual abused by multiple family members during childhood. This has caused a lot of problems in my life, but one is worse than the others. I am attracted to children. I have never molested a child, but I have sometimes searched the Internet for images of children. I am always filled with disgust when I do this, and I hate myself for what I am.

I know you’ll tell me I should get help, but how can I do that? If anyone knew this, I wouldn’t be able to keep a job, or have friends. I am so scared. Most of the time I want to die, and I have considered suicide.

What can I do?

There is a hysteria around pedophilia, and I am no exception to it. There are questions I get nervous about answering on the program, and no episodes are more nerve wracking for me than my "After Dark" shows. On the first, we talked about marijuana from a Christian perspective, the science of monogamy, and that crowd favorite–masturbation.

I was already planning to cover a question about polyamory on this episode. Polyamory is a pretty inflammatory subject, even among progressive thinkers. But polyamory is a product of consenting adults. Pedophilia is a predatory act on the most innocent among us.

My first instinct was to delete the email, and I almost did. But then I remembered a story I read a few months ago about a teenage who was sexually attracted to children but had never acted on it.  I remembered that the young man (and it is most often men) wanted help, wanted to change, before he did anything, but he couldn't find it.

You see, we have a blindspot in our view on pedophilia. We don't know what to do with people who are attracted to children, but have never acted on it. We don't know how to help those who know they need help, and are responsible enough to avoid acting on their impulses.

For someone who accepts the mantle "Science Mike," I had a hard time finding good science on pedophilia. Research is sparse, and contradictory on possible root causes. Online resources about possible treatment all echo one theme: seek help. But anyone who seeks help for treatment of pedophilia from a mental health worker may run into mandatory reporting laws.

They can be reported, not for doing anything, but for having the potential to do something. They could end up attached to a crime they didn't commit.

I asked my Twitter followers if anyone knew of options for people who struggle with sexual attraction towards children. My followers are a helpful, knowledgeable bunch, but in this case, all I got was references to a fascinating episode of The American Life.

But one reader in particular sent me a note that inspired me to write this blog.

Hey, Science Mike. My name's Stefan. I tweeted to you earlier about the idea "crowdsourcing" help for the man who keeps his attraction to children in check. Something really got to me about that segment. It wasn't merely the horrifying scenario of the afflicted man. It was rather the obvious pain in your voice at receiving the question and not feeling like you could help that particular individual. It hurt hearing you talk about it, because I hadn't heard that note of hopelessness in your voice before; as if it echoed the pain of him being abandoned to his nightmare by everyone in his life; possibly coupled with the guilt over the involuntary disdain for someone with his described predilections.

I think everyone who listened to that segment could feel the same thing.

It strikes me how deeply christian the themes of this particular dilemma are. It parallels the whole drive to want to be able to lend "grace to the tarnished"; it mirrors the example of Jesus healing the lepers - i.e. the deeply unfortunate, and universally reviled and shunned.

Apart from praying for the individual, I suspect that taking the opportunity to show this person that there are potentially thousands of compassionate listeners of your podcast that are deeply concerned with his wellbeing; and in fact that there are a lot of people that admire his struggle, and specifically the nobility of his restraint, could in and of itself be a salve to this wounded individual. If there ever was a salient description of hell; that man is definitely experiencing it.

Think of what it would mean to a person like that, (and probably thousands with similar stories), to know that not only is he being prayed for, but that he, in a quite real and christian sense, is LOVED. Imagine the fortitude it must take to withstand this undeniable darkness that was essentially put into him: Leprosy of the Soul, or the closest non-supernatural equivalent of "demonic possession".

Just imagine how much a person like that, especially if he's nominally christian, would experience the knowledge that he actually can be loved. That his struggle isn't just a shameful one, but one that many people could actually find in their hearts to ADMIRE him for. There is True Grace in that. There is healing power in grace; it is a bulwark, a buoy.

There is truly a ministry in this; in following the example of Christ, granting grace to the leper, the "unclean". There is beauty and light to be wrested from even such horrible, unfathomable circumstances as this. It is christian in the deepest possible sense.

And, if this in the end turns out to be some kind of dishonest troll, it doesn't actually matter. These people exist. Their souls are wracked with pain. There are probably hundreds, if not thousands of people like this; pedophiles that somehow keep true evil, true darkness, in check. And they do it alone, all the time living with the nightmare, and the deep, deep shame, and intimate knowledge and conviction that they are Unclean; that they are "spiritual lepers" that no one even wants to see, much less help, and to an even lesser extent, love.

They can be anonymous. But they don't have to be "alone".

He doesn't have to be alone.

 /Stefan (@Qirronis)

In an average month, my blog is read by 10 times as many people than follow me on Twitter. So, I'm asking you, yes you, to help. If you know of any support groups or treatment options for people who wrestle with demons the rest of us can only image to leave it in a comment below this post. Likewise, if you can offer a word of encouragement or grace to those people who are attracted to children, but resist that attraction because they understand the consequences of such actions, please do so.

This isn't a hypothetical exercise. Real people struggling with this will read this post. Any help you can provide may not only help someone, but in doing so may protect a child, too.

photo credit: Guilt and shame via photopin (license)

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This is my personal, jazz-ish arrangement of Lorde’s song Royals, featuring the musical skills of my sister’s band Awktopus.

In a perfect world, I would have performed this using an upright bass with saxophones and trumpets and poetic finger snaps. But unfortunately, my limited resources stuck me with the lonely sound of the low E on my acoustic. Lucky for me though, my sister and her boyfriend were in town and they helped me spruce it up with some great shaker and bongo action.

Their band is still pretty new, and they’ve only done one video together. But if you thought they were fantastic, check them out and encourage them to make more stuff by commenting and subscribing! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NUK8GNaof6I

In the mean time, please feel free to do them same here. :) Subscribe and comment with a song suggestion and I’ll try to make it happen. :D

Also big shout out to my hubs, David for helping me edit this!!

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As You Love Yourself

I've got this incredibly talented friend. She writes music, and sings like an angel. She paints, and has really flawless taste. She's kind, compassionate, and thoughtful. She's breathtakingly beautiful. She's incredibly gifted. And she has very little sense of self worth. How can this be? This is a pattern I've seen in so many quality people. It's as if their eyes are blind to what makes them special. They often struggle with low self-esteem, and are genuinely incredulous when people say kind things about them or their work. I know successful business people who feel like frauds and best selling authors who only believe the tweets that mock their ideas. I know musicians who question their talents, but believe their harshest critics–even though they sell enough records to make a living. How can this be? What do you think about yourself? Do you like you? Would you want to be your friend if you were someone else? What do you think about your body? How do you feel when you see pictures or videos of yourself? Or when you hear a recording of your voice? How do you feel when you stand before a mirror, naked and exposed? I think most people don't like themselves very much, and as a result are unkind to themselves in a way they would never be to another person. I hear this voice anytime someone expresses disgust at a photograph of their own face, or revulsion at the sound of their voice. I've noticed people use the word "hate" most often toward themselves. This self-hate comes from a couple of wells, both deep and powerful. The first is shame from the past. Every time we shared some part of our personality or creativity as a child and were ignored, rebuffed, or rejected it left a mark. When a parent didn't pay attention, or a class mate mocked, our brains store that experience as trauma. We developed as a social species, and our brains spend considerable energy constantly estimating our social standing. We want to present our best self to others so we have the best possible social standing. This helps us secure a place in our community (we once called them tribes) and secure the best possible mate (our DNA really wants to link up with another set of DNA to replicate). The second is fear of pride. Religions tend to link shame with sin–it's a powerful way to create an emotional response. Religions also tend to minimize ego, often for good reason, but this can go too far. We can become terrified of being prideful to the point that we obsessively check our motives, and preemptively pull the sprouts of self-worth from our hearts. We value humility. But humility isn't thinking less of yourself. Humility is thinking of yourself less. Ironically, constantly worrying about pride is anything but humble–it's an obsession with self. Here's the deal: some of you was a gift, a set of propensities and predispositions that emerged from the unique genetic and epigenetic information that created a template for you, as well as the environment that shaped you. But the you that looks back in a mirror is also the product of thousands of choices you made, like what to eat, or how to respond to the telemarketer that got you up from dinner. You are in a constant state of reinvention, and unstable equilibrium between nature and nurture. Your template plus your choices creates all kinds of advantages and disadvantages. Maybe you are tall, but shy. Or very short with an incredible singing voice. Whatever you are, you have amazing strengths and weaknesses. And both are vital parts of who you are. Our shame makes us pretend we don't have weaknesses, to ourselves and to others. Pretending you don't have weaknesses leads to arrogance. Our quest for humility makes us pretend we don't have strengths. Pretending you don't have strengths leads to low self-worth, and doesn't actually help us be humble. Here's how this works in practice: I'm a great public speaker–I can dazzle a crowd with words. I write well. I'm a good husband and father. I'm an empathetic, affectionate friend. I work hard. I am a man with many strengths. I'm really absent minded and forgetful–I lock myself out of my house all the time and I can go months without remembering to call friends I care about. I've got a flabby belly. When I'm tired or excited, I mumble or mess up the tenses of words. I have absolutely no ability to resist hot pizza. I am a man with many weaknesses. Some reading my strengths may be shocked at my bravado to admit those things, but that's their own shame talking. I'm grateful for my strengths, but I know they aren't something I made. But, I have worked hard to grow and develop those strengths over my life. Saying those things doesn't make my chest swell, or make me feel superior to anyone else. They are just parts of me. Others will read my weaknesses and think I don't like myself–that I'm ashamed, but again, that's their shame talking. My weaknesses are also things that I didn't create, and in some cases I've nurtured them just as much as my strengths. They are just as much a part of me as my strengths, and in some cases they are even a result of my strengths. I'm absented minded because I have a phenomenal gift for mental focus. I forget the keys because I'm contemplating the implications of modern Cosmology on our ideas about God and how that can help other people. Part of why I'm an interesting speaker is the unique, quirky pattern of my speech. You see, embracing both your strengths and weaknesses leads to health, grace, and humility. I am self aware, but I don't think about myself nearly as much as I did when I was obsessed with humility. I am who I am, and I can change who I am over time. This awareness and acceptance is key. It is the beginning of the abundant life Jesus spoke about and the renewed mind Paul wrote about. You are strong, and you are weak. Both are beautiful. Accept it. Love yourself. You'll never be able to truly love your neighbor until you do.

photo credit: 021/365: Made up. via photopin (license)

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Book Review - Searching for Sunday

The Church is dying, and you know that because every pulpit, Christian blog, skeptic's website, and news media in America delivers that message like a skipping record. The church is tearing itself apart over the authority of science, patterns of abuse, and the "gay issue." Mention any of these issues on Facebook, and dozens of people will be happy to tell you what "Jesus really meant," or why "religion is harmful and headed for extinction." Rachel Held Evans dives head first into these waters in her latest book, Searching for Sunday. I should mention that this is no unbiased review–I'm both a fan of Rachel's work and fond of her as a human being. This is a vital book: a vision for a church that rises to face this era, and it's by far the most powerful writing that Rachel has done. That's saying something, as Rachel's skill with prose is something I envy almost every day. Rachel's voice is often associated with two very different streams in the world of Christianity: Evangelical and Progressive. For many Evangelicals, Rachel is often a thorn in their side, a voice shouting over the fray that undercuts some uncomfortable issues. For this same reason, she's a rally point for Progressives. Rachel gives a lot of disenfranchised people hope. And yet, I've seen scores of my conservative, evangelical friends express interest in Searching for Sunday. That attention is well deserved because Searching for Sunday is a beautifully written, much needed work for a Church in the middle of Civil War. It's a reminder of what following Jesus together can look like. It's a thoughtful examination of how an entire generation of people longs for Jesus, but have trouble with His Church. Centered around seven sacraments, Searching for Sunday tells stories from different traditions within Christianity, along with Rachel's journey from her Evangelical roots, to a small church plant, and finally an embrace of the mainline Church. Most encouraging is the way Rachel incorporates the presence of all these movements into her faith. Don't expect to find the tenets of the One True Christianity here. Instead, you'll find the story of a large, half-dysfunctional family made up of Baptists, Methodists, Catholics, Orthodox, Episcopalians, Pentecostals, Emergents, and I-Just-Can't-Do-This-Anymore people who are all obsessed with Jesus Christ. I mean that literally, Rachel describes the church as a family living in a house together, and it's a beautiful metaphor for how denominations are a gift as much as a curse. I used my camera phone to take note of the passages I wanted to highlight when I wrote a review of Searching for Sunday. I took over 40 pictures, mainly when I found myself laughing or weeping. I'm a big hearted guy, but that's an uncommon level of emotional engagement even for me. Chapter 10, What We Have Done, is stunning in its power as it describes both the ancient and modern atrocities of our faith, as well as the saints who stood for justice and peace. That's because Rachel never casts anyone as the hero or the villain. She spends plenty of time mourning with those who mourn, but she doesn't point the finger at anyone. Rachel highlights our shared brokenness and our shared hope. She talks about doubt, and the infuriating ways that Christians "help" the doubting. In one story, Rachel is teaching at a youth retreat, while unsure what she believes. At the climax of the event, she's asked to be one of the communion servers. Rachel writes this about the experience: “As I stood at the front of the rustic camp meeting room, holding a loaf of bread in one hand and tearing off a piece at a time with the other, hundreds of people approached, one at a time, with their hands held out, ready to receive. 'This is Christ's body, broken for you,' I said. I said it over and over again, to each person who came to the table–to the back-row boys who avoided my gaze, to the girls whose mascara rivered down their cheeks, to the kids who giggle in line with their friends, to the ones who came all alone. This is Christ's body, broken for you.” Rachel goes on to describe the transformative experience of serving communion for the broken from a place of brokenness and the insights she gained from the experience. So often we search for answers to life's most difficult questions in ideas and beliefs, but the Gospel only takes on life in flesh and blood. When our questions turn into actions that meaning is found, and Rachel illustrates that beautifully in Searching for Sunday. So what of a dying church, tearing itself apart? This was the most powerful message of Searching for Sunday. Empires fear death, but the Church is in the resurrection business. Christianity has died over and over throughout history, and each time it's been resurrected with a new voice and a new body that speaks to a new time. Perhaps it's time to stop lamenting this death, and instead become a part of new life. As Rachel says in a chapter titled Easter Doubt, “And sometimes, just showing up, burial spice in hand, is all it takes to witness a miracle.” Searching for Sunday will be available everywhere on April 14, but you can preorder it now.

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Interviews Everywhere

I do a lot of interviews, but I've had several recently that I especially enjoyed. I'm posting them here for any of you who may be interested in what we discussed--they all cover topics I frequently get emailed about.

I talked about the philosophical and practical implications that science has for Christianity with the folks over at Theologies.com. This was a really nerdy talk, and more theological/philosophic than my usual fare. For those of you who've asked me about those kinds of discussions, this one is for you.

My friend Lanny Donoho and I sat down to talk about the science of prayer and meditation, as well as practical tips to try mindfulness. That conversation wandered into faith, doubt, and how the church and best help those who are working out what they believe.

At the End of the Day Podcast asked me about the science of gender and orientation in the light of LGBT equality and the modern church. I really learned a lot from the hosts of the show, and I think it's a great listen for anyone who wants to dig deeper into the science of attraction and what it means for people of faith.

Of course, there's a brand new Ask Science Mike today (The Apocrypha, Death, and The Day The Sun Stood Still), and The Liturgists Podcast just released a really popular episode on The End of the World.

photo credit: podcast via photopin (license)

[mikemchargue]

Axioms About Faith

This post is going to be nerdy, but it's been widely requested. I can't put it off any longer without starting a riot among my most loyal listeners and readers. It probably won't be interesting if you don't need it, but I've found that people who need these ideas find them fascinating–even refreshing. These are my axioms of faith. An axiom is a premise so evident as to be accepted as true without controversy (according to Wikipedia). To that note, everything on this list is something I can support with mainstream science. This is a form of faith for empiricists and skeptics–the people who need evidence to support any belief. Some of these are more developed than others. My axiom for God is an example of one I can defend well. My axiom for sin on the other hand, could reasonably be disputed by a philosopher. It's reasonable, but far from perfect. This system isn't perfect, but when the way you know God is crumbling (or already dust), this can be a scaffold that supports you as you build a new model for the Divine. Even in my case, these axioms don't incorporate all I believe. I'm leaning towards an Eastern Orthodox view of salvation these days, but I can't back that empirically. It's a matter of faith. The Axioms of Faith are a ladder. The starting point is complete religious and spiritual unbelief. Each step moves you toward some form of Christian belief and practice–but never an orthodox Christian faith. There's nothing in these axioms about Christ as an exclusive means of salvation, for example. Nor is there anything about heaven or hell–the afterlife is unfalsifiable at this point. For me, these were a fence against my most intense doubt. My ability to deconstruct and analyze every experience led me to doubt the nature of my encounter with God in the weeks after it happened. So did new insights or learnings from science, and new arguments against belief in God. This list is my search for answers in the face of The Mystery–all those things we don't know about how we got here and the why behind it all (if there is any "why" at all).

Faith is AT LEAST a way to contextualize the human need for spirituality and find meaning in the face of mortality. EVEN IF this is all faith is, spiritual practice can be beneficial to cognition, emotional states, and culture. God is AT LEAST the natural forces that created and sustain the Universe as experienced via a psychosocial model in human brains that naturally emerges from innate biases. EVEN IF that is a comprehensive definition for God, the pursuit of this personal, subjective experience can provide meaning, peace, and empathy for others. Prayer is AT LEAST a form of meditation that encourages the development of healthy brain tissue, lowers stress, and can connect us to God. EVEN IF that is a comprehensive definition of prayer, the health and psychological benefits of prayer justify the discipline. Sin is AT LEAST volitional action or inaction that violates one's own understanding of what is moral. Sin comes from the divergent impulses between our lower and higher brain functions and our evolution-driven tendency to do things that serve ourselves and our tribe. EVEN IF this is all sin is, it is destructive and threatens human flourishing. The afterlife is AT LEAST the persistence of our physical matter in the ongoing life cycle on Earth, the memes we pass on to others with our lives, and the model of our unique neurological signature in the brains of those who knew us. EVEN IF this is all the afterlife is, the consequences of our actions persist beyond our death and our ethical considerations must consider a timeline beyond our death. Salvation is AT LEAST the means by which humanity overcomes sin to produce human flourishing. EVEN IF this is all salvation is, spiritual and religious actions and beliefs that promote salvation are good for humankind. Jesus is AT LEAST a man so connected to God that he was called the Son of God and the largest religious movement in human history is centered around his teachings. EVEN IF this is all Jesus is, following his teachings can promote peace, empathy, and genuine morality. The Holy Spirit is AT LEAST the psychological and neurological components of God that allow God to be experienced as a personal force or agent. EVEN IF this is all the Holy Spirit is, God is more relatable and neurologically actionable when experienced this way. The Church is AT LEAST the global community of people who choose to follow the teachings of Jesus Christ. EVEN IF this is all the church is, the Church is still the largest body of spiritual scholarship, community, and faith practice in the world. The Bible is AT LEAST a collection of books assembled by the Church that chronicle a people group's experiences with, and understanding of, God over thousands of years. EVEN IF that is a comprehensive definition of God, study of scripture is warranted to understand our culture and the way in which people come to know God.

May this scaffold support you as it supported me.  

photo credit: Sun Setting on the Workers Day via photopin (license)

[mikemchargue]

[mikemchargue]

Do the Work

Lately, people think I've got a plan. They believe I'm executing a carefully crafted playbook. I host two podcasts. I write a blog. I do a lot of interviews and speak at a lot of events. I'm working on a book.

I have no idea what I'm doing.

No one is more surprised by the traction my work is getting than I am. So, when people ask me "How do you find blog readers," or "How can I get more podcast listeners," I don't know what to say. It's as much a mystery to me today as it's ever been.

I don't think anybody knows what they're doing. All the people we think of as successful or influential, as far as I can tell, are mystified at how their work finds an audience.

This mystery is not absolute, because I can track the changes in my life to some specific changes in behavior, and I've noticed these behaviors are common to everyone I know whose work has scale.

1. What you do today beats what you might do tomorrow.

We humans are natural dreamers, and we like to plan out a path that will give us the most reward for the least effort. We work on and refine ideas in our heads endlessly. We imagine our book, or our podcast, or our hit record.

Stop doing that.

There's nothing wrong with dreaming, but people can't hear your dreams. You have to wrestle your dreams from the ether and into form. You have to sit down and type, or record, or sculpt.

You'll hate a lot of what you make. The first fruits will look and smell funny. That's ok. Your failure to produce something you like is exactly what teaches you to make something that you do like.

So dream, dream big, but work on turning those dreams into a work every single day. Don't talk about writing, or read about writing. Write.

2. Make what you need.

Despite all the myriad media options today, there is something you wish existed that does not. Some different sound in music, or some discussion or story. You want to read a story about two computers that fall in love but can't have babies. You want to hear a song that features an accordion/banjo backing tracks.

On a deeper level than taste, what's missing in the world? What story is untold? What downtrodden community needs a hand?

Congratulations, it's your job to make the thing you want. No one else will. You may find that when you build a daily discipline of making things, more ideas come to you. Write them down–you may miss them later.

3. Talk about what you love and what breaks your heart.

Forget marketability. Don't look at the trends. What makes you tick? What wakes you up? What turns you on?

That's what your work should be about. The more specific the better. I love neuroscience and Jesus, so I talk about those things a lot. I like the poetry of cosmology. It doesn't matter how weird it is–the more I love it the more people respond to it.

One of the most popular episodes of The Liturgists Podcast is about an obscure theory of human consciousness. That episode gets passed around like candy, and I've met some amazing people because of it.

4. Give it all you've got.

This is the big one. You have to want it–and I don't mean acclaim, or popularity. You have to need this work to come to life. It has to be life or death. It has to be on your mind as you fall asleep and there when you wake up.

Everyone wants to make an impact, but few are willing to pay the price. I constantly turn down invitations from good friends to do fun things. I don't watch television. I get up early and stay up late.

I do the work. Every day.

That means I miss out on a lot. I have a full time job, and I'm married with kids. So, that means I have to cut almost everything in my life that isn't The Work. I am part of community, and that community fills me with the essential essence I need to keep going.

But, I am 100% committed to The Work. If you call me and want to hang out, I usually can't. I have work to do. I can't relax until I've done the work that day. I give myself the seventh day to rest, but otherwise it's go time.

That doesn't mean I'm busy. Quite the contrary, I've cut almost all the “busy work” from my life. When it's time to work, I unplug. Texts, calls, and emails can wait. Many don't require a response at all. Others need a response: “no.” Getting more done, ironically, actually means doing less. I'm not talking about working yourself into exhaustion, or doing it all. I'm talking about letting go of everything you have to in order to have the time and energy to do the work that matters.

Guess what? There is no more peaceful sleep than the sleep that comes with getting it done. When you know you wrestled ideas from the ether and put them into form, that you are singing your part on the great chorus of life, you sleep like an old dog in front of a fire.

Are you ready to put it out there? To make what you need? To tell the world about what you love, and what breaks your heart? Can you do the work today, and not put it off to tomorrow? Are you willing to give up whatever it takes to make your ideas into real work?

The audience will show up the day you stop caring if they do. Make the work you have to make, and then it will work for you.

If you'd like to get started, read The War of Art. More than anything else, this book taught me how to get the work done.

photo credit: Artist via photopin (license)

[mikemchargue]

Addicted to the Infinite Validation Machine

I had one of the first Blackberrys. I don't mean the Blackberry phone–I mean the two way pager. The only other person I knew who had one was my boss. We used to email each other saying things like, "I'm at a red light!"

I also had a cell phone, and a beeper. I wore them all on my belt in holsters, creating a nerdy version of Batman's utility belt. The ability to connect to anyone, anytime was empowering. Freeing even. I never had to fear missing out.

I had no idea the impact this technology would have on our culture. After a few years of constant connection, of constant pings, rings, and dings, I started to fray. My mind was overheating, and I couldn't relax.

My job requires that people can reach me–and for good reason. Important machines sometimes need my attention. But, the never ending barrage was killing me. I've always been a deep sleeper, but I found myself waking to every buzz of my "silent" devices.

I set up a series of disciplines that let me be available in the ways I needed to be, but also gave me the ability to focus and rest. I beat digital addiction and distraction. My life improved.

At least I did until I became Science Mike. Suddenly my phone rings, dings, and pings more than ever. However, now it isn't machines asking to be fixed, but people telling me they like my work. I'm part of this incredible community online of people who see the world much like I do, or at least walk a journey like mine.

So almost every ping brings good news.

Someone liked that post! Someone retweeted that tweet! Someone hearted that Instagram! A bunch of people downloaded that Podcast and now it's in the Top 20! Someone wants to book you to speak! Someone whose work you've admired for years wants to talk on the phone! EVERYTHING WONDERFUL IS HAPPENING ONLINE!!!

Meanwhile, my amazing wife and children see me stare into glowing screens a lot. I don't just mean the necessary stuff–the recording of podcasts or the writing of articles and books. I mean the Addict has returned, and his drug is all that affirmation.

I set up all those boundaries years ago to protect me from stress. Now, I know that's not the only tug. Good things can addict you too.

This pull has dark roots. Fear.

I'm afraid a lot. I'm afraid if I don't reply to your tweets or comments you'll move on and stop supporting my work. I'm scared if some successful industry person gets my voicemail, they'll write me off. I'm scared if I'm not quick on the draw with potential events, they'll slip away.

I know this is nutty in my higher brain. But that Ancient Wolf in the limbic system doesn't trust so easily. It's kill or be killed. It's hunt or starve.

I've stopped practicing what I preach. I am not fully present in many conversations because I'm fascinated with the seemingly sudden success of my public persona.

I'm going to try these tips 2012 me came up with in the coming weeks. If you also wrestle with digital distraction addiction, try them with me.

Delay connectivity when you wake up. One of the worst things you can do is start your day with email and texting. It's much better to wake up, eat breakfast and get dressed before diving into the digital demands of the day. This is critically important for making a plan of attack for your day instead of turning into an email-firefighter. If you like to read the news on something digital before or during breakfast, feel free. Just stay off social networks, email and SMS.

Plan working blocks with limited connectivity. When I am working on large projects, I typically silence my cell phone. If I am working on my iPad, I'll often use Airplane mode to stop all distractions. When I am working on my Mac, I will keep email closed and only check it once per hour.

Put the phone away at meals & meetings. If you are eating alone, avoid the temptation to socialize virtually. If you are eating with friends or coworkers, pretend you don't have a phone at all. This will actually benefit your employer! When you don't allow your mind to disengage a problem during lunch, you often prevent yourself from gaining enough distance and perspective to solve it.

Make 30 minutes before bed a "no media" zone. If you want good sleep, you have to change your media habits. Social media and email speed up your thoughts, and prevent restful sleep. Television is not a good idea either. The best pre-bed activities are conversation and reading. Keep in mind that reading from a glowing screen is counter productive as you convince your brain it is midday based on lighting.

It was precisely when I felt most confident that I'd beaten smartphone addiction that I fell victim to it once again. This is a common cycle in humans, falling down when we stand most tall, and even our awareness doesn't always prevent it.

If you've got ideas on how to beat the Digital Itch, share them in the comments below.

photo credit: oh brother, via photopin (license)

[mikemchargue]

Round Table: Genesis and the Origins of the Universe

I was invited to participate in an inter-denominational discussion of the relationship between Genesis and how our Universe came to be. I'm linking to it from my blog in case any of my readers may be interested–there are some really thoughtful contributions.

You can read it at Conciliar Post.