one-cheesy-atrocity

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

okay so Lady and the Tramp is being rebooted

normal brain: ahh yes another disney remake of an untouchable classic that is about as solicited as a penis on the internet in a cashgrab attempt to insist on its own dwindling corporate relevance. sigh

galaxy brain: but what poor d-list hollywood soul is gonna play the cgi meatball ????

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

when it’s 2am and a hot take thwaps you in the face that phineas and ferb is the same show as supergirl

In which the plot centrally revolves around an ambiguous government agency frantically covering up the double life and unlikely secret identity of an endearingly roguish adopted agent from their super angsty scientist soulmate and family. villainous inators are merely a cry for validation and love as a history of dubious filial abandonment has predisposed the troubled scientists to only recognise the superhero disguise by the laughably transparent trope of a physical accessory (glasses/bowler hat) bc of such deep rooted conviction that no one of such recognisably, quantitatively good character could ever associate w them. in this essay I will-

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

Re: news that supergirl’s earth is merging to earth 1

They’re gonna make me watch Kara lose another planet. They’re really gonna Do That and make Melissa cry again aren’t they ??? Gonna make me Feel Things aren’t they ???

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

Like, this was unprompted, peak Kendrick gay nonsense. she out there fucking obligerating this male. The international implications. The interSTELLAr implications. Her brain. That power.

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

I think the biggest lie your body can tell you is when you hold your chest and feel your heart beating when you know it isn’t.

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

The sequel: diff expression, just as little resolve to actually Talk To A Girl

Rewatching the L Word. The essentially closeted tennis player with no gaydar or game resonates with me somehow…

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

Rewatching the L Word. The essentially closeted tennis player with no gaydar or game resonates with me somehow...

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

Alexa play Bridget Jones’ baby and watch me try to protect my heart

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

Like all the great artists

My best work is post hummus

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

Not quite sure who gave Melissa Benoist permission to get bangs like that and end my life but fine

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

Some of you have never fallen in love with someone you shouldn’t have and intensely hated yourself everytime you gave another part of your ridiculous heart to them and it shows

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

A modern day unstoppable force meets immovable object:

my mum’s intense desire to appease my homophobic grandparents with old fashioned Christmas songs is at war with my sister’s equally forceful compulsion to point at me every time a lyric has the word gay in it

after all, as far as Beatrice is concerned, neither the Yuletide nor Hannah, are gay

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

Lena luthot is simultaneously the best thing I’ve typed all week and also the worst thing my eyes have ever seen

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

You know that wonderful moment when ur just minding ur own business and ur crush walks in and uuuuuuuh god she looks hot and fuck me why did she smile at me like thAT I didn’t run track at school my heart isn’t built for this - it’s the best lurching excruciating feeling and you kinda want to die but also phoahhhh and then gah I’m a stupid tangle of heart eyes, angst and the sound a grape makes when you step on it

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

I listened to you talk for three years and didn’t once request the return of my heart

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

It is the noble duty of the closeted lesbian to fall comprehensively and angstily in love with their best friend

[one-cheesy-atrocity]

You know you’re in trouble when she doodles something on your notes and you suddenly NEED it tattooed on your person somewhere