qwiinky

[qwiinky]

deez nuts

Sun Tzu, The Art of War

[qwiinky]

what

why are some men so goddamn attractive i want to be them as well as be absoloutely destroyed by them im so gay and transgener like boy you find as he’ll i wont you :lipbite:

[qwiinky]

"Oh, Kevin", you thought to yourself as you lustfully peered at Kevin's sexy, lanky purple body through his bedroom window. "What lengths I would go to swallow you whole!". Kevin was increasing his intellectual levels quietly and sexily, unknowing of the stalker at his window. As he continued to quietly study the human anatomy, you lost yourself in the gentle glow surrounding your beloved Kevin. That is, until he received an unfamiliar phone call. Your cheeks filled with blush as you obsessively watched his sexy, long body wriggle out of his small chair to grab the device that was ringing obnoxiously. So many unpleasant thoughts proceeded to fill your head, "Who is calling my beloved Kevin?!". You can only barely hear his hot, deep voice through the barrier of glass separating you from Kevin. "Hey babe!", your beloved says to the phone in joyful surprise. You've heard more than necessary, and decide it's time to make your move while that stupid lover of his can hear! "Y/N?!" Kevin gasps in shock as you break his annoying bedroom window. His face of horror triggering all the oxytocin chemicals that your body can take, you turn red and flash him a pretty smile. "H-hey, Kevin". You mumble as you bow down in front of your sexy beloved and hand him a love letter. Too frightened of you to move or disobey, he opens this letter, but what seemed to be an innocent letter containing those feelings of yours, was an explosive that killed everyone apon opening.

The end.

By my friend about his worm on a string.

[qwiinky]

it gets kicked, you feel it bend around the sides of your foot before it blasts off. when it lands it makes exactly the sound you think raw meat makes when it hits the ground. You run to it, making sure no one else was coming after it, and you kick it again, getting closer and closer to the goal. the meat makes squelch noises as it keeps on being kicked around before it flies into the goal, the fat pressing up against the net. Only then do you realise you're alone in an empty soccer field, no opponents, not team mates, but you still know that you have won, and you still celebrate, because this, is FIFA World Cup 2026. truly the finest victory, you think to yourself, going to pick up your precious fat orb not having realised it has practically welded itself to the net. looking at it you decide "its been a good run, friend" and to leave it. because there are no victories without some losses.

Rip chest orb fat FIFA World cup 2026, it lived a good life.

By me and my boyfriend (we are both trans) about tiddy fat

[qwiinky]

“Life. What is it? The definition is unclear and near impossible to find the answer to, yet people search having known this fact. That is a little something called determination, a lot of people find trouble finding the determination to do simple tasks. That’s why we’re here.” Person A sighed as he watched his best friend attempt to eat a chair.