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[shadowsingersmate]

Okey so I had to say this because it’s starting to piss me off. Im tired of seeing fanfics about characters with hashtags about other characters.

Like WHY THE FUCK does cassian x reader has Azriel, rhysand and gavriel fics? Or why does Azriel x reader has casssian and rhysand gics like COME ON people.

I know it’s a way to get more recognition but it’s kinda annoying when you’re trying to read a story about your comfort character and you cannot find one.

I’m not trying to hate or anything just letting y’all know :)

[shadowsingersmate]

Angst azriel x reader request

i just thought, what if the one mate could feel it when the other would cheat on them? azriel cheating on y/n and she doesn't tell him that she knows, she keeps it to herself until one day she's had enough because she over hears him telling someone in the ic that he loves y/n and would never hurt her and they start to fight. she tells him the truth and she just leaves him all togehter. overtime az tries to talk to y/n but she doesn't budge they end up not getting back together and stuff if you wanna change some things thats fine

Okey I’ve been vv inactive but it’s because I’m just not okey but I LIVED THIS IDEA so here we go.

Also I have about three or four requests draft that I gave up in the middle so I’ll try to finish those as well .

I didn’t proof read so…. Yeah I hope you like it :)

The black blanket had fallen over the sky signing the arrival of the night.

You were sitting on the couch, reading a romance book that nesta had recommended you couple of days ago, it was alright you guessed. It was particularly hard to concentrate to the main characters love life as yours was already falling apart.

Azriel hadn’t been at home a lot lately. He had a lot of work and you knew, you could understand but it was all too much. You had missed his touch, his company, the endless talks that you two would have at the nights were you both couldn’t sleep.

You close the book as you sighted and went over the kitchen to make some tea, maybe that would help calm you a bit, maybe that would help to get your sleeping schedule back to normal. You had gotten used to Azriel holding you that you found it hard to sleep when he wasn’t there.

Once the tea was brewed you went into your bedroom and sat on the bed, admiring the view from the window, the stars were beautiful! You smiled as you remembered how Azriel would take you out on late night dates, just you two staring at the night sky.

It hadn’t been long before you fell asleep, the sleeping tea madja had recommended was truly doing wonders when it came to sleep diprivation.

-

Azriel’s scarred hands were grazing her naked body as his lips found hers. The passion was clear, both of them fighting for dominance, their sent of arousal filled the air making you gag.

“Azriel…” you choked but he didn’t listen, he didn’t even spare you a glance.

You felt his emotion, the longing, the want, the lust. You felt everything. You shook your head taking small steps back as tears escaped freely. You could hear their moans, you could see everything.

“Azriel!!!” You shouted again and closed your eyes, but when you opened them again you weren’t in the room were Azriel and the girl had been but your own shared bedroom. You were sweating, weeping.

A dream you realized but them you felt a wave of pleasure running through your body and then another. You felt longing and want but no, those weren’t your feeling they were azriels.

It wasn’t a dream it was a moment, a moment of azriels long nights working. He had lied, he was cheating on you.

You just stayed there frozen, waiting for the emotions to stop and they did, then you felt his regret and you closed the bond shut forming a thick brick wall between your and his mind.

You rushed to the bathroom, you knew Azriel was coming home, he would be there in a couple of minuite sand you weren’t ready to face him.

You cried and cried trying to remember anything you had done that led to this moment.

You couldn’t really blame him, the girl was beatiful, blonde hair and blue eyes eyes, her breasts were much fuller than yours and her curves were perfect, unlike you, you looked like a child compared to her.

It was your fault, you should have taken better care of yourself maybe then Azriel wouldn’t feel the need to seek something more mature, someone better.

You heard the door click from downstairs and hurriedly you wiped your cheeks and stalked over the bed.

“What are you doing awake love?” love? Seriously?

“Good, how was work?” You asked

You expected from him to look regretful or maybe tell you the truth, but he didn’t instead he said a quiet “fine” and went to the bathroom to get ready for the night.

Once he laid on your bed you had seriously contemplated to tell him, yo let him know that you knew what he had done but you decided that it would be bette rig you just stayed quiet.

-

Months had past with you being silent. Everyday he would come home and you expected him to break and reveal the truth but he didn’t.

Meanwhile you felt anger building up, you felt like you were suffocating. You no longer trusted him, you found yourself thinking thrice before you believe anything he said.

He was taking you on more dates than before and he was being at home for longer which made things harder.

You tried to better yourself by working out longer hours and eating healthier, you no longer felt comfortable with him seeing you without make up.

Azriel had realized obviously and you knew, that was something. Maybe now you could be enough for him.

It wasn’t until a couple of weeks when you were passing rhysands office when you heard the three brothers talking.

“I don’t know what’s happening to her, she barely even let me see her in the morning” Azriel exclaimed “she doesn’t even touch sugar, you all know how much she used to live sweets”

“Have you tried to talk to her?” Rhysand asked.

“Yeah, I’ve tried once or twice but she just change the conversation completely, I don’t know what going on” Azriel said worriedly “I’m trying to think of anything I may have done to hurt her but I would never do anything that would cause her the littlest bit of pain you know that right?”

You laughed out loud and the males stopped talking, after a few minutes cassian opened the door and his eyes softened at your presence.

“Y/n what are you doing here?” Azriel asked.

“I was just passing by when I heard your little speech do how much you love me and care about me” you scoffed voice dripping venom.

Azriel flinched at your words. “Love? What’s going on?” He asked perfectly calm.

“What’s going on? You must be kidding me Azriel. You really must think I’m stupid” you chuckled darkly.

“What are you saying?” Cassian interrupted.

“Oh I’m just talking about the passionate night Azriel had with a stranger not to long ago. Do you remember love?” You said mockingly.

Azriel’s eyes widened and he started shaking. “What? I-“

At this point both Cassian and rhysand had turned their attention to their brother both shocked. “Azriel is this true?” Cassian asked clearly angry.

Cassian was your best friend and his anger was clear.

“I-“ Azriel stuttered.

“You what? You went and slept with someone and I blamed myself for it. I though okey maybe Azriel wants something more someone better. So you know what I did Azriel? I tried to become better” you practically shouted “and now” you laughed “and now you’re what? You decided that you love me? You decided that you worry about me?”

“Y/n let me explain please I- you are perfect I just-“ he was panicking.

“No, you know what? You had your chance to explain, I gave you two months for you to tell me, to be honest with me and explain how I don’t want to hear it” you spit before you turned and left.

-

Months after the hurt was still there buried deep, the void of losing someone you loved so dearly was there but you couldn’t ignore the weight that lifted off your shoulders.

Azriel had tried to talk to you for months after that but you refused to listen, you left the inner circle but still held your relationships with the rest of the inner circl. You’d till went shopping with mor, you still spent hours taking with Cassian, you still read with amren and nesta, you still went to Rita’s with them when azriel didn’t go.

You were happy that you had succeeded in keeping your relationships, however sometimes you still had thoughts of what would happen if you decided to talk to azriel, what would happen if you’d let him explain and maybe try again fresh. But that wasn’t possible, he had lost your trust, even if you wanted you could never trust him, you would never be like you were before.

Sometimes you liked to look forward to the future and see what would happen if you and Azriel made up and become friends, maybe you could rejoin the inner circle but he was your mate.

You sighted, he was your mate and he had hurt u deeply and just like that the pain blossomed again before you pushed everything down and wore the blank expression again as you realized that nothing would be the same again, you would never find happiness again.

,

[shadowsingersmate]

I’m obsessed I love this way too much cannot wait for part 8

My Little Fire

Chapter 7

First < Previous > Next

“Yes, we all have the same features. Dark skin, dark hair and, usually, brown eyes, and sure, the wings. We are the only species with membranous wings.”

“You are fighters, aren’t you?” I asked.

“Yes, we are. We start training very little and never stop.”

That explained the size of his muscles under the clothes. His arms were thicker than my thighs.

I let the silence reign in the room while I trailed in my thoughts about the male at my left.

“And how is Feyre?” Elain’s voice brought me back to the table. She got her fear aside to ask a question.

I had been so concentrated on Azriel that I forgot to ask about my sister at all. Shame squeezed my heart, but it left with his answer.

“She’s doing fine, I think. I haven’t stayed at the Night Court for long this week, but when I saw her she was alright, and Rhysand would have told me if she wasn’t. She missed you, the tree of you. She was happy to see you again.”

My heart warmed to hear that. I had missed her dearly. I wish I could send her letters at least. Maybe Azriel could help. I would have to ask him later.

“You have been staying here to collect information about the queens, haven’t you?” I asked.

He looked at me, his features becoming relaxed and lovingly.

“As always, you are right.”

I blushed and resumed eating my food, to at least try to hide the red on my face.

“What is it like in the Night Court?” I was curious about the place where the sky reflected on its High Lord's eyes, like the stars.

“It's beautiful. During the day the sun shines high, making the snow capped mountains shine. But it’s even better during the night. The stars and the moon are bright, illuminating every piece of land and reflecting on the rivers and the ocean. When you fly over all that excellence there’s nothing more you can want, only the peacefulness that moment offers.”

Maybe only somebody to share it with you, he didn’t have to complete it, it was written in his eyes. I shivered at the thought of how our minds were connected and smiled sympathetically at him.

It looked like a real paradise, even in my imagination. It was perfect. I could imagine Azriel flying with me in his arms like that day. Hovering above snowy forests with the stars above us. I could see him smiling and laughing as if I was there now. With him. I couldn’t imagine it without him.

I only noticed we were staring at each other when Nesta coughed. Taking us out of our little world. We finished eating in silence.

Nesta didn’t say anything before leaving the room, and Elain gave us a small shy smile before following her. I hit my head on the table, where, thanks to Azriel, my plate wasn’t anymore. And sighed.

“I’m sorry about them.” I said without moving.

Azriel chuckled beside me.

“It’s alright, it’s not your fault. They dislike my presence, and I can understand that. I’m not the best of the companies either.”

I lifted my head then, furring my browns. How could he think that? He was a gentleman towards my sisters, but they treated him like he didn’t even exist.

“No Azriel. Don’t say that. Their unmanned behavior was unacceptable. You didn’t do anything for them to treat you like that, the opposite actually, you were respectful. It’s not fair. And I think you are a very pleasant company.”

I could see the red that strained his cheeks and had to hide my smirk behind the back of my hand. Not even the dark shade of his skin covered it and his wings retreated a little more when he noticed that I was trying to hide my amusement.

He was really cute when embarrassed, I’d make it happen more times just to see his reaction.

I stood up and he followed me. We grabbed the plates from the table, since my sisters couldn’t even do that, and took them back to the kitchen. I started washing it and Azriel got back to the dining room to take the stool he had used. He sat at the same corner as before, watching me work.

“Do you want some help?” He offered as soon as he saw what I was doing.

“No need, thanks though. You are a visitor, I shouldn’t force you to do the dishes.”

“You are not forcing me, I’m offering.” He said already standing by my side.

“There are no problems, you can sit, you may be tir—“

Parei de falar quando senti algo gelado na ponta do meu nariz. Ele tinha passado um punhado de espuma no meu rosto. Olhei para ele com fúria e ele gargalhou pondo as mãos no estômago com a força da risada. Mas isso não ia ficar barato. Fiz formato de concha com as mãos as enchendo de água e joguei nele, que não viu o ataque, pois estava de olhos fechados.

I was cut short as I felt something cold hitting the point of my nose. He had splattered a handful of foam on my face.

I looked up at him with furious eyes and he laughed. His hands were on his stomach as he laughed hard.

But it wouldn’t be cheap. I moved my hand in the shape of a shell and filled it up with water from the sink. I threw it at his face, thanks to his closed eyes not seeing my attack.

He glared at me with his dripping hair and it was my turn to laugh. I was so distracted that I didn’t notice when he approached me. He held my hands, stepping closer until my back hit the sink bench. I had already stopped laughing and was fixed on his serious eyes.

Azriel lifted my hands above my head, fixing them on the cupboard with one of his scarred hands, so I couldn’t escape.

“Do you think it’s funny?” He asked and I gulped.

Our faces were mere inches apart. A distance he shortened stepping even closer. I could feel the warmth emanating from his body. He lowered his head until his nose touched my neck and his breath made me shiver.

“Won’t laugh now?” He asked with a low voice and I could feel my center crunching. My breathing was uneven and my heart hammered on my ears.

He breathed in on my skin.

But then I felt something cold running down my spine. I whined and he laughed, stepping back. He had poured water on my back making it run inside my dress. It was freezing and it left an uncomfortable feeling. I squirmed trying to dry it a little. Useless. I was soaking already.

“You will pay bat boy.” It only made him laugh louder.

“Bat boy?” He asked incredulously. “I’m 537 years old, I think I’m not a boy any more, haven’t been for some centuries actually.”

“You may not be a boy anymore, but for sure still act like one.” I said laughing.

It was easy to make jokes with him, everything was easier actually.

“If I’m a boy, then Cassian is…? He asked, arching one brow.

I laughed. Cassian was, for sure, the kid.

“Yeah, he’s the kid. Especially with pancakes involved.”

He chuckled and we decided to clean the mess we’ve made. Seriously now.

It was late already and Azriel would have to leave some time, unfortunately.

“Have you three been friends for a long time?” I asked, curious about their friendship.

“Since I was 12, Cass was 11 and Rhys 10. We are more like brothers actually. We’ve known each other for so long that I can’t imagine living without one of them. They are my family, the only that I ever had.”

My eyes fell with sorrow when I saw his expression. I placed a hand above his and saw him flinch as if he was disgusted by the touch. So I squeezed it, trying to express my support, but also saying that I would be there for him. He looked at our hands then. Mine and his, covered with scars. He seemed to notice that I didn’t care about them, since his shoulders fell as if there was a weight on them before. He nodded, telling me that he had understood the meaning. I smiled sadly trying to comfort him.

We kept silent until we had finished. I knew he was thinking about what we'd talked. And I felt guilty for making him feel sad.

“”I’m sorry, Azriel. I shouldn’t have brought up the topic. I didn’t want you to feel bad.” I said drying my hands.

“Is alright, Aideen. My cloudy thoughts weren’t your fault. You only made a question.” I smiled slightly, thankful but yet embarrassed.

I finished putting away the plates and turned to him.

“Azriel, is there any way for me to send letters to my sister?”

He stopped to think for a second and then started. “Directly, like here in the human helm, no. But Cass and I are coming every few days, we could take them for you.” I smiled openly at the kindness. “By the way, the queens haven’t answered our letter yet, have they?”

“No, not yet. Sorry for the useful trip”

He shrugged. “It was worth it for me.” He smiled then.

“But you’ve spent most of the time answering my questions. I must be really boring to be with.” I flinched and he laughed.

“Not at all. I enjoy answering your questions.”

“Be careful. Otherwise I won’t give you any peace.”

“I really don’t mind. Your curiosity is adorable.”

I might have blushed like he did before, if his laughter was any sign. I couldn’t answer. Didn’t trust my own voice. So I just nodded.

“I think it’s better if I leave now. It’s late already.” He said, still chuckling a little.

I tried not to become sad, but I couldn’t hide it. It was funnier with him around.

“Okay.” I said with a weak voice.

And he noticed.

“I’ll be back in a few days.” He said calmly and with gentle eyes. Trying not to make me sadder.

I smiled weakly at him. “Come on, I’ll go outside with you.”

We exited through the back door, at the kitchen.

And face to face he looked inside my eyes deeply.

“If you want, you can write to your sister. Cass will come the day after tomorrow and take it to her.” He whispered. “Thank you. For the food ano for the kindness.”

My heat squeezed, full of sympathy and angry by the way that my sisters treated him.

“It was nothing. I’ll give the letter to Cassian then. Thanks for helping.”

He nodded, saying that it was nothing.

“Until a few days, Aideen.” He said as sweet as honey and his shadows entangled themselves all around my body, as if they didn’t want to leave.

“See you, Azriel.”

And just like that he inclined his upper body to press a kiss to my cheek. I closed my eyes enjoying the feeling. And when I opened them he was already in the air.

A beautiful angel with dark wings.

[shadowsingersmate]

I kinda want to start writing smut.

What do you think? Should I?

[shadowsingersmate]

Not requested but I’ve come across a lot of fica where azriel is being distant and doesn’t communicate with the reader (which I absolutely love cause I’m a drama and angst enthusiast) BUT! I wanted to make a fic where the reader actually tries to talk to azriel and he listens and tries to help them. So without farther adue hope you enjoy!

Warnings: depressive thought, mention of suicide, self desperation.

It was happening again. You thought you had gotten better, you thought that after ten years with the love of your life, your mate -Azriel- you would get better. But that was not the case at all, not only you didn’t found peace but your mind started battling with you harder, the force of your depressive thoughts would never fail to crush every bit of confidence and happiness you had worked so hard to built.

You knew you had to talk to someone, no matter how hard it was, you knew you had to open up. It was hard, especially as bottling up your emotion had become a habit. However, if you ever wanted to get better you had to talk to someone and you had decided that the only person you trusted with this piece of information was Azriel.

He was currently in his office doing some paperwork, you stalked right outside the door and stayed there, hesitating. Maybe he was busy, maybe you shouldn’t talk to him right now.

𝑀𝑎𝑦𝑏𝑒 𝑎𝑓𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑡𝑒𝑙𝑙 ℎ𝑖𝑚 ℎ𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑟𝑒𝑞𝑙𝑖𝑧𝑒 ℎ𝑜𝑤 𝑝𝑎𝑡𝑏𝑤𝑡𝑖𝑐 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑑 ℎ𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑓𝑖𝑛𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢. 𝑊ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑎𝑓𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑙𝑙? 𝑌𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑒 𝑗𝑢𝑠𝑡 𝑎 𝑤𝑜𝑒𝑡ℎ𝑙𝑒𝑠𝑠 𝑝𝑖𝑒𝑐𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑎ℎ𝑖𝑡, 𝑛𝑜𝑏𝑜𝑑𝑦 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝑙𝑖𝑘𝑒𝑠 𝑦𝑜𝑢. 𝑌𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑒 𝑗𝑢𝑠𝑡 𝑎 𝑏𝑢𝑟𝑑𝑒𝑛, 𝑎 𝑤𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑠𝑝𝑎𝑐𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑜𝑥𝑦𝑔𝑒𝑛. 𝑌𝑜𝑢 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑚𝑖𝑠𝑒𝑟𝑎𝑏𝑙𝑒, 𝑔𝑢 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑎𝑧𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑙 𝑚𝑖𝑠𝑒𝑟𝑎𝑏𝑙𝑒. 𝐷𝑖𝑒. 𝐷𝑖𝑒. 𝐷𝑖𝑒

You clawed at the skin in your palm as an attempt to shut down that malicious part of your brain. You raised your fist, you were ready. You were….

𝐴𝑛𝑑 𝑤ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑎𝑟𝑤 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑔𝑜𝑛𝑛𝑎 𝑠𝑎𝑦 𝑒𝑥𝑎𝑐𝑡𝑙𝑦? 𝑇ℎ𝑎𝑡 ℎ𝑒 𝑓𝑎𝑖𝑙𝑒𝑑 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢 ℎ𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑦? 𝑇ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑢𝑛𝑔𝑟𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑓𝑢𝑙𝑙?

You suddenly lost every bit of nerve and lowered your fist. He would think you were ungrateful.

You were just about to leave when the door opened suddenly revealing your mate. He looked tired, but not as exhausted as he usually looked.

“What’s wrong love?” He asked. You could see from he look on his face that he knew something was up.

You were about to wave his question off with your usual ‘I’m fine’ and a weak smile but you had made a promise to yourself. You needed help and this was your one chance.

“Actually. Can- can I bother you for a bit? It won’t take long” you could feel the anxiety creeping “of course, come in” his eyebrows furrowed worryingly

You took a couple of deep breaths or at least you tried too. He gestured for you to sit down but you shook your head and he nodded sitting on his chair. You could feel his eyes burning your figure and your hands started shaking uncontrollably.

“What happened?” He asked and without taking a single second to rethink you decision you lashed out. “Lately I’ve been having this problem. Actually is not really lately. I- I’ve been dealing with this since before I met you, since I can remember and I- I thought it was getting better and that I could deal with this on my own but I’m kinda struggling so” at his point you were pacing, fidgeting with your hands, your voice breaking with each word. For a moment you contemplating glancing down at your seated mate but you knew that if you so much as tried to look at him you would completely lost your nerve, so you continued.

“I don’t want you to think that you are not enough for me, or that you ever did anything to make me sad, or rethink my worth and everything, it’s really not your fault and I really don’t want to wasn’t your time and bother you but I- I think I really need help Azriel” you took a deep breath.

Azriel listened to you, pure shock and sadness washing though him. He couldn’t stand it, you looked so nervous to talk. For a moment he really though he did something to make you not to trust him. “Love, what kind of problem?” He had some ideas himself but he wasn’t sure and he wanted to be sure about what you were dealing with, he wanted to help you with everything he had.

You sighted “it’s that, my mind sometimes can be a little too loud. Umhh it- I will just hear this voice - which I know it sounds crazy- but it keeps telling my that” tears started blurring your vision but you went on “I don’t- that- I-I” you couldn’t utter the words, you really couldn’t.

You took another deep breath, then another, trying to calm yourself, trying to avoid the panick attach you could feel to starting getting too close. “It keeps telling me that I’m worthless, that I don’t deserve anything, that I have no one and that I’m alone and that nobody really cares or will ever care cause I don’t deserve it and I- I know it’s partially true but I-“ and then it hit you, everything just slumped to you and your sobs got louder.

You unconsciously moved your hand to cover your mouth to muffle the sounds (as you always did when azriel was home). In a matter of seconds Azriel was besides you, his arms wrapping a round you, his hand stroking your back gently, whispering sweet nothings into your hair.

“Baby please. I know what is like. You sound perfectly reasonable” that was all he could say for now. He was devastated, the only thing that kept him from tearing up was the urge to be strong for you, to be strong enough to help you.

You stood like this for a while, he had let you cry and let your emotions out for as long as you whised. When he realized that you were calm enough he slid his hand under you chin pushing it upwards “look at me, you are 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦𝑡ℎ𝑢𝑛𝑔 to me, you are everything I could ever wish for and more. I love you, I’m by your side, I will always be by your side. Please, just please believe me. I love you, you’re not worthless you have helped me, you’re ere the one to bring light into my life when I was at my lowest please” he couldn’t help it, he was crying.

You buried you head into his chest again, not being able to say anything. You felt a shift in the room and when you looked up you realized that Azriel had winnowed you to your shared bedroom.

“I love you, there’s nothing that I could ever want more than you” he said stroking your hair softly.

“Thank you Azriel. I- I just want you to know that this is not your fault at all. You are everything I could ever wish for as well and I love you” you said between sobs. Azriel nodded in response before tightening his grip.

Right there and then you both had realized that no matter what you had each other. That you had someone to turn to, that you would never be alone ever again because you had each other.

[shadowsingersmate]

Not requested but I wanted to do a one shot about azriel taking care of his mate during her cycle. I just feel like he would be THE best and THE most caring and understanding person to walk on the earth. Hope you enjoy :)

Warnings: none just fluff.

A/n: I didn’t proof read so there will be some mistakes, I’m sorry.

It hurted so bad.

You could not focus anywhere but the piercing pain on your lower stomach.

Yes, both, Feyre and mor had warned you, they told you about how painful your cycle would be. At first you thought it was just an exaggeration, but when Mor said that there were days where she couldn’t even stand up or even sleep from the pain you couldn’t help the terror that washed through you.

You knew it was just your hormones but you couldn’t help but feel a bit disappointed when azriel hadn’t came home, your cycle had started a couple of hours ago, Azriel had already left and you didn’t feel like distracting him from work. You also knew that Azriel’s guilt would eat him alive if he came home and saw you in this state. He always knew when your cycle was on its way, when you asked him he said something about his shadows noticing the change in your body temperature.

When you realize that Azriel had about two more hours of work before coming home your brushed a uncomfortable pained feeling through the bond hoping that he would realize.

You were curled up on the couch, unable to stand up and walk to yours and your mates shared bedroom when you heard the front door open and close. At first you were confused, it was too early for azriel to be home and the only person who had keys for your apartment was Feyre - the only person you trusted to respect your privacy- but you doubted Feyre would come.

“Love, I’m back” a too soft voice said and you glanced towards the door, only to see your mates hulking figure walking towards where you were currently laid. “Why didn’t you tell me earlier? How do you feel?”

“Hey. you were busy” you murmured softly, the sound barely audible.

“Oh love” he sighted and sat on the edge of the couch, his hand sliding on your lower stomach, staying there. “I brought you pastries”

“Really?” You widened your eyes excitedly. He chuckled “yeah, really”. He helped you sit properly on the couch and opened the bag, revealing a strawberry pastry (your favourite).

“I’m gonna go and run you bath, okey?” You nodded and he kissed your temple stroking your head lightly.

Once you ate, Azriel was back, he picked you up and carried you to the bathroom. Once you both bathed together he helped you dress up and laid you on the bed “I’ll be back soon okey?” He said.

He left the room only to come back five minutes later with tea and a book, the book you were currently reading. “Drink” he urged as you picked the mug and took a sip. “It will help with the pain, I travelled to the day court a couple of months ago and a healer there told me that this would helped, it’s specifically for your cycle, it will help ease the pain” you smiled softly “thank you”

While you drunk the tea, he read you the book. You couldn’t help but smile at how caring he was being- not that it was the first time- but it never failed to make you smile.

Once you finished, Azriel decide that it would be better if you slept. He closed the book and gathered you in his arms “thank you Azriel, for everything” you murmured as you buried your head deeper on his chest. “I love you” he said before kissing the top of your head.

[shadowsingersmate]

Hiii can you do a really angsty azriel×reader where they have a huge fight about him not opening up to her but with a happy ending so they make up at the end?

Hey! I have a lot of request atm and I should probably be doing them by chronological order but I LOVED this idea so here it is.

Tw: cursing, slight mention of sex :)

Hope you enjoy this!

You and Azriel had been friendsfor what you’d say a long period of time. You knew each other for four years now and it was safe for you to say that you had left yourself open for him to see. Especially after you two had gotten together, no you weren’t mated but he still was a huge part of your life. You didn’t hesitate once, you told him 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔, around him you were yourself. You wanted him to know every single part of you. You trusted him that much.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t the same for him. Although you two had known each other for so many years he’d still be too close to himself. He’d never talk about his feeling, about his day. cauldron! He’d never talk to you about anything important, the only way for you to know a somewhat small part of him and his life would be cassian.

But you’ve had enough of that, enough of this bullshit behavior. You trusted him more than anyone and although you couldn’t and didn’t 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑡 to force him to tell you. No, he was a grown male and he could do whatever he wanted but you wanted some answers, you wanted to know why he was so secretive, why he didn’t trust you.

-

It was a normal day, nothing special really. You had just came home from a meeting with rhysand (as you, yourself was a part of the high lords court). Azriel came back to your shared apartment briefly after, the skin under those beautiful captivating hazel eyes bruised, his own gaze hiding pure rage. You would admit, he did do a good effort trying to hide his anger but you’d see under those eyes.

“Hey” you smiled. But your smile quickly faded as he dismissed you with a small ‘hey’ , barely audible in the quiet, empty room.

“You okey?” Such a simple question, but his next words meant so much to you.

Silence....

“You wanna talk about it?” You tried again.

“No” he retorted abruptly. You seriously didn’t know why would you get your hopes up. It was more than obvious that he simply didn’t want to talk to you.

“Are you hungry? I could make dinner” you tried again.

No answer.

“Azriel”

No answer

“Azriel,‘I’m talking to you. Are you okey?”

No answer.

At this point you had stood up walking towards him. He was just standing there, he was gazing at the window, at this point you didn’t even know if he actually heard you.

“Azriel!” You raised your voice.

“Can you please be quiet!” He shouted loud enough for you to flinch. “I don’t 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑡 to talk about it” he said pure venom dripping of his voice.

You’d never see him this mad over something you had said, and you, for sure, didn’t expect for him to be this mad over such a small question.

“You see that the thing Azriel, you 𝑛𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟 seem to want to talk about it” you snapped. No, you’ve had enough, this was the last straw. “I’m here, I’ve been by your side for years, I’m trying so hard. I’m always trying to make you happy however I can. I’m trying to help you, I’m trying... Cauldron boil me I’m trying so hard” your voice broke slightly at the end “what can I do for you to trust me? To open up to me for once? What do you want me to do?” You raised your voice

Now it was his turn to flinch, he just stayed quiet, his eyes burning yours. His lips forming a thin line, almost as if he was restraining himself from saying something.

You soon realized what he was trying so hard to hide, it had 𝑐𝑙𝑖𝑐𝑘𝑒𝑑, the mating bond had just clicked. You watched him carefully, his look was enough for you to realize that he had know about the bond.

“The bond, you knew about the bond?” Of course that was what he was trying to hide.

No answer, just a guilty look sprained across his face.

“How long?” You questioned. “Y/n please just hear me out”

“That was what all of this were about,Right?” You laughed bitterly “you didn’t once see me as something important, just some stupid female you could keep around so you could use whenever your wanted a quick release, right?” You watched him, he was completely out of words. What could he say really?

“And to think that I was worried about you not trusting me, now it all make sense” you said more for yourself to hear “you barely talked to me, you barely had time for me except only when you wanted to fuck” you sobbed.

“No, y/n please just let me explain I- I“ he lookd shuttered. His gaze was a mixture of pure regret and guilt.

“No- dont! I won’t tolerate this anymore Azriel, I’m tired. You want a quick lay out? I don’t care anymore use your hands, go to a pleasure hall cause I don’t give a fuck anymore Azriel. Because you clearly don’t want 𝑚𝑒“ you turned to leave but something stopped you midway “just answer this one question” you fiddled with your fingers, afraid of his answer. “Did you really wanted to hide the bond so badly? Is really being my mate so tragic?” You immediately regretted your questions “actually don’t- don’t answer, goodbye” you said before you ran away, you needed space- lots of it.

-

It had been a week since you last talked. You’d be so desperate to find a way to get him out of your mind, to forget him that you had asked Rhysand for more work, a whole lot more work.

You’d barely sleep, barely eat. You’d wake up train, work, work, work and then, 𝑖𝑓 you felt too tired you might have actually gotten some sleep.

You’d also bought a new apartment for yourself, you couldn’t bare staying there and also you didn’t want to kick out azriel so you did the next best thing. You’d spent a small amount of money for something small, just enough till you found something better cause your decision was final. You weren’t going back to him, never.

Of course the inner circle had started to get worried, you wouldn’t even attend the family dinners anymore, you just disappeared. You had hidden the location of your new apartment for a couple of weeks before mor and cassian appeared at your doorway desperate for a talk.

Cassian was like a brother to you, mor was your sister. You talked to them, you trusted them but this, this was different. What would you say? They would probably tell you to talk to azriel. That he couldn’t bare being alone or some shit like that, he was their family after all.

It wasn’t that you were being ungrateful, the inner circle never once made you feel out of place, they all welcomed you and treated you like family but that didn’t mean that would last long enough after you and Azriel brake up.

“Hey” mor said quietly.

You muttered a small ‘hey’ in response before moving out of the way sot hey would come in.

“We’re have you been y/n? We were worried” cassian started, he didn’t do it on purpose. Cassian would always jump in questions, he cared deeply for you and you knew that. Mor on the other hand shot he a glare before starting, hereself asking questions “do you want to talk about it? I could ask the baby to leave if you want to” she said.

You let out an agitated sight, blinking back the tears that were mere second from breaking away as you remembered ℎ𝑖𝑚 “There’s nothing to talk about”. You would never imagine how much a heartbreak would hurt. It felt like you had lost a whole part of yourself, a part that would never come back.

“It was never meant to last anyway” you said finally, hoping that they would just drop the subject. It was true, you knew that this relationship would work out, couldn’t work out. He was, well he could have whoever he wanted, what special did you have? Well certainly not whatever he wanted.

-

A month, it had been a month. A whole month with tiring days and endless, sleepless nights. Your under eyes were bruised and your body had changed. The work was swallowing you whole but it did wonders when it came to forgetting him.

Mor, cassian, rhysand, Feyre, even amren and nesta would come to talk to you and make sure that you were okey. You had also realized that Azriel, himself was trying get you to talk to him.

He’d do some hopeless tries. He’d tell Azriel to convince you to join the dinners and start coming on the inner circle gathering more often, mor had told you. But you just knew that whoever Azriel had wanted instead of you just didn’t feel the same way so he tried to found you again.

As you were drowning in you thought a knock was heard, weird. Nobody and told you anything about any visit today. You stood up and made your way towards the door, it was probably cassian and he probably had forgotten to tell you that he would visit.

But you weren’t ready for the person that was standing right outside your doorway. Muscular, tall Illyrian, wings tucked in tightly, grazed eyes scanning you whole. Look filled with guilt. 𝐴𝑧𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑙.!

“Hey” he gave you a soft smile, but it did nothing to hide the pained expression that lingered on his eyes.

You averted your gaze as you clenched your jaw. For a moment you contemplated shutting the door in front of his face, scream at him, or even launch yourself at him.

He had lied to you, he had hurt you, he never trusted you and you didn’t know what was worse the fact that he never saw you seriously or the fact that you believed in this relationship- you believed in him….

“What do you want?” You fought with everything you’ve got for your expression to remain neutral.

“I want yo talk, I- I know what I did was wrong and I know that I hurt you, deeply, but” he paused taking a deep breath as if to calm himself.

“But what?” You snapped venomously and he flinched, he actually flinched “You come here trying to what? Apologize?” You started pacing “I am your mate, and I can understand and accept the fact that you don’t want the bond, that you don’t want something more intimate between us but not telling me? That’s was beyond cruel, because you knew, you 𝑘𝑛𝑒𝑤 that I wanted to find my mate, you knew that I wanted you to be my mate and you didn’t care”

Azriel’s eyes widened in disbelief as he heard you talking. You laughed bitterly “you’ve been dragging me besides you for years and for what Azriel? For what? To dump me when you’ve found someone better? Someone that you actually want?” You blinked furiously trying to restrain your tears.

“Y/n please, I- I do have feeling for yo-“ Azriel tried but you were quick to interrupt him once again. “You think that I’m mad because you don’t have feelings for me? You’re unbelievable! I angry because you hid something like this from me, you humiliated me”

“No!” His voice rose slightly “I never said that, just please let me talk” you snorted but let him go on “I- I love you, all this years weren’t a waste for me. I knew you were my mate from them moment I first saw you. I hid it and it was wrong of me, yes. But I did it because I didn’t want you to feel obliged to accept the bond, I wanted you to see me, I wanted the best for you and still am and I know that I’m not the one that can make you happy y/n” his eyes shone, tears threatening to escape.

“I love you so, so much and the fact that I cannot be the one to make you happy… it kills me. I do t deserve you, I never did and I never will do yes I’m sorrry that I hurt you, I’ll never forgive myself for this but I don’t regret not telling you about the bond from the start, because I know- mother burn me, I know that I’m not the best for you” he was crying, the legendary shadow singer 𝑤𝑎𝑠 crying in front of you.

Your heart broke at the sight of him, at the sight of someone you cared abott it so deeply being so vulnerable in front of you. “Azriel I- I had no idea” you couldn’t restarting your own tears. “I- you, you are amazing you deserve 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 this world can give you, you are everything I could ever wish for and even more. If someone does not deserve this relationship is me. I’m sorry. I- I love you”

His lowered head rose as you uttered the last words, his lips twitched slightly, but the smile didn’t last long as he continued talkibg “It’s not that I don’t trust you, I do trust you, it’s just hard for me to share my feelings and sometimes I need some time before I am ready to talk about some things. But I swear I’ll try, I’ll try so hard to be everything you want me to be. You are my everything”

It was your turn to smile “I love you, I love you, I love you” you repeated again and again as this head lowered, his lips met yours and the room erupted. The kiss was filled with all the love you two had for each other.

“I love you more” he whispered as he pulled you in for a hug.

[shadowsingersmate]

Hi! Firat of all I hope you're doing well and safe. And second I saw that you take requests and I love azriel dearly 💖😅 So may I request for newly mated azriel×fem reader headcanons of just like jelous Azriel one shot 🥺 thank you so much!

Hey! Yeap I’m good now that school ended, I hope you’re doing good as well.

I really hope this is what you had in mind while sending me the request :)

Warnings: none

Azriel thought today would be a nice, relaxing night out for him, the inner circle and his mate, his 𝑛𝑒𝑤 mate.

It had been only a month since they both accepted the bond and azriels instincts had been going crazy ever since.

His mind would scream to “protect” her at all costs.

He would go crazy every single time some pathetic male would flirt with her, hoping to get an invitation to her bed.

He would have little 𝑠𝑒𝑐𝑟𝑒𝑡 talks with every single one of those males.

She was his, he was hers. No one had the right to flirt with her.

But he couldn’t blame them, she was... well stunning would be an understatement. Her body figure, her big innocent eyes, plump red lips and rosy cheeks. He swore she was every males dream. Which made everything worse for him and his Illyrian insticts.

Tonight there was this Illyrian male, he was sitting besides her at the bar, cracking jokes. But this males intentions were more than obvious to azriel.

He watched every single one of his movements carefully. He watched how he sifted his legs, how he raised his glass, how his eyes gazed lower and lower every time she averted her gaze, how his hands tried to get closer and closer.

He had had enough, had enough of This males hunger.

He started walking towards them, blood boiling, wings slightly flaring outwards in a protective stance.

She was laughing at something he said when azriel stood behind her, an arm wrapping around her dainty shoulders.

“Oh hey” she said with a too innocent smile. Azriel couldn’t be mad at her, not when he knew that she had no idea that this male was trying to get with her.

He game her a nod and a slight smile before he averted his gaze tot he male “Is there a problem?” Azriel asked the male, his eyes sparkling with a warning look.

The male stepped back slightly. He just moved his eyes from her to azriel. “No, why?” He said a bit too proudly for azriels liking.

Azriel smirked at the males bold tone. That male had either literally no idea to whom he was talking to or he was just that much of a fool.

“Azriel, what’s going on?” She asked sweetly, her head tilted to the side, eyebrows furrowing.

“Nothing love” he said as he watched the males mouth taking the shape of an “O” before stepping backwards again.

Azriel smirked. “I’m sorry I didn’t know” he said. “Thought so” Azriel retorted while giving the male a feral look.

“I’m sorry sir” he said again before living.

Azriel watched him disappear into the crowd, his shadows following the male, making sure he wouldn’t try anything else. As terrified as this male seemed when he left, azriel knew more about these female hungry Illyrian males and he wouldn’t risk it.

“Azriel?” She was beyond confused “it was nothing sweetheart” his too soft voice said as he kissed her temple squeezing her into his arms.

[shadowsingersmate]

Okey just a theory but hear me out.

We all know that writers like to have some draft chapters to help with the whole book plot and everything.

We all know wing and embers which is a “deleted” scene from acomaf, in which nesta and cassian talk and we get to know more about their relationship etc.

Then the next book happened to be about nesta and cassian.

Now we have a “deleted” scene about azriel in which we see more about azriel and GWYN. So my theory is that azriels me GWYN will be an endgame. I mean it makes sense. Maybe Sarah j mass made this scene to help build the relationship between azriel and GWYN.

What do you think?

[shadowsingersmate]

~MASTERLIST ~

Acotar:

-cassian:

-Azriel

Headcannons:

Fanfics:

[shadowsingersmate]

Hi, are you still taking requests? If so, could you please write one in which the reader is Azriel's sister and she has a nightmare? Maybe one of them comes running in and comforts her? I'm in need for more acotar one shots!

Okey so I really liked this idea, I feel like azriels sister would be an Illyrian and as a female she’d not have the best childhood.

This is kind of both Azriel and cassian one-shot but I felt like cassian would care deeply about azriels sister. I feel like he would feel like she was his sister as well so that what i wrote.

Warnings: nightmares, ptsd, death.

𝐼𝑡 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑟𝑖𝑓𝑦𝑖𝑛𝑔. 𝑆ℎ𝑒 𝑤𝑎𝑎 𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑐𝑒𝑑 𝑜𝑛 ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑘𝑛𝑒𝑒𝑠, 𝑚𝑢𝑠𝑐𝑢𝑙𝑎𝑟 𝑖𝑙𝑙𝑦𝑟𝑖𝑎𝑛𝑠 𝑠𝑢𝑟𝑟𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑑𝑒𝑑 ℎ𝑒𝑟. 𝐻𝑒𝑟 𝑓𝑎𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑝𝑚𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑏𝑜𝑡ℎ 𝑔𝑎𝑧𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑡 ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑠𝑢𝑏𝑚𝑖𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑣𝑒 𝑙𝑜𝑜𝑘𝑠.

“𝑔𝑒𝑡 𝑜𝑣𝑒𝑟 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑖𝑡“ ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑓𝑎𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑜𝑟𝑑𝑒𝑟𝑒𝑑.

“𝑛𝑜!“ 𝑠ℎ𝑒 𝑠𝑐𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑚𝑒𝑑 𝑎𝑠 𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑖𝑙𝑙𝑦𝑟𝑖𝑎𝑛𝑠 𝑟𝑎𝑖𝑠𝑒𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑖𝑟 𝑠𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑑 “𝑛𝑜! 𝐷𝑜𝑛𝑡! 𝑃𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑒“ 𝑠ℎ𝑒 𝑡𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑑 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑜𝑣𝑒, 𝑡𝑜 𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑣𝑒, 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑖𝑙𝑙𝑦𝑟𝑖𝑎𝑛𝑠 ℎ𝑜𝑙𝑑 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑡𝑜𝑜 𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑜𝑛𝑔.

𝑆ℎ𝑒 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑𝑛𝑡 𝑏𝑒𝑙𝑖𝑣𝑒 𝑖𝑡, ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑤𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠 𝑤𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑏𝑒 𝑐𝑢𝑡 𝑜𝑓𝑓, ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑝𝑟𝑒𝑐𝑖𝑜𝑢𝑠 𝑤𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠. 𝑆ℎ𝑒 ℎ𝑎𝑑𝑛𝑡 𝑓𝑙𝑒𝑤 𝑦𝑒𝑡, 𝑠ℎ𝑒 ℎ𝑎𝑑𝑛𝑡 𝑦𝑒𝑡 𝑓𝑒𝑙𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑓𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑑𝑜𝑚 𝑜𝑓 𝑓𝑙𝑦𝑖𝑛𝑔.

𝐻𝑒𝑟 𝑓𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑑𝑜𝑚, 𝑎 ℎ𝑢𝑔𝑒 𝑝𝑎𝑟𝑡 𝑜𝑓 ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑤𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑏𝑒 𝑡𝑎𝑘𝑒𝑛 𝑎𝑤𝑎𝑦 𝑓𝑟𝑜𝑚 ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑡 ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑠𝑒𝑛𝑡. 𝐵𝑢𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑤𝑎𝑠 ℎ𝑜𝑤 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠 𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑒.

“𝑛𝑜! 𝑆𝑇𝑂𝑃!“ 𝑠ℎ𝑒 𝑠𝑐𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑚𝑒𝑑 𝑎𝑔𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑎𝑔𝑎𝑖𝑛. 𝑃𝑟𝑎𝑦𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑔 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑤𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑛, 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑤𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑠𝑎𝑣𝑒 ℎ𝑒𝑟. 𝑆ℎ𝑒 𝑠𝑐𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑚𝑒𝑑 𝑓𝑜𝑟 ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑏𝑟𝑜𝑡𝑏𝑒𝑟, ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑚𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟, ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑝𝑏𝑟𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑠, 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑜𝑛𝑒, 𝑎𝑛𝑦𝑜𝑛𝑒....

“𝑁𝑂!“ 𝑆ℎ𝑒 𝑦𝑒𝑙𝑙𝑒𝑑 𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑙𝑎𝑠𝑡 𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒 𝑏𝑒𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑠𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑑 𝑐𝑎𝑚𝑒 𝑑𝑜𝑤𝑛 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑎 𝑙𝑜𝑢𝑑 𝑐𝑙𝑎𝑝 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝑝𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑠𝑜𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑑 𝑎𝑡 ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑏𝑎𝑐𝑘.

𝑆ℎ𝑒 𝑠𝑐𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑚𝑒𝑑, 𝑠𝑜 𝑙𝑜𝑢𝑑, 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑝𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑢𝑛𝑏𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑎𝑏𝑙𝑒. 𝑆ℎ𝑒 𝑓𝑒𝑙𝑙 𝑡𝑜 ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑠𝑖𝑑𝑒, ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑒𝑦𝑒𝑠 𝑡ℎ𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑛𝑖𝑏𝑔 𝑡𝑜 𝑐𝑙𝑜𝑠𝑒. 𝑇ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑖𝑡 𝑖𝑡 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑜𝑣𝑒𝑟.

-

Azriel was awakened by his sisters horrifying screams. He didn’t think twice before grabbing the truth teller and rushing out of his room. He met with Cassian, his brother ready to face the threat- like a warrior.

They both rushed in her room and stilled at the sight of her.She was twisting around on her bed, yelling words such as “NO” and “DONT” .

“Hey, wake up, wake up” he gently shook her shoulders. Once cassian realized that azriels gentle words wouldn’t do much to wake the female he shouted, loudly “WAKE UP”

Azriel shoot him a warning look which cassian dismissed.

She jumped forward screaming.

“No,no,no” she kept repeating as she tried to touched her wings. She soon realized that they weren’t there.

After he found out that his sisters wings were cut off so soon he was infuriated. He hunted down his father, killed him. Same with his stepmother and stepbrothers. He’d found her crying “it’s over” she’d repeat over and over as Azriel had his arms wrapped around her, hoping to ease her pain. He’d never forgive himself, he’d never get over the fact that he wasn’t there, he wasn’t there to protect his only family- his sister. He was angry with himself, angry with his father, his stepfamily, with the five illyrians who helped clipped her wings (all five of the found dead and brutally tortured)

Cassian was no better, azriels sister was his sister. He helped Azriel on killing those illyrians. She was too damn young and she had just lived such a traumatizing experience. He remember her not being able to walk correctly afterwards cause of the pain, her avoiding her reflection- afraid to see her figure without her wings.

“It’s over Azriel, my wings, it’s over” she sobbed quietly.

Azriel just stared at her “I’m sorry” he said before taking he into his arms “I should have been there” he said. The nightmare must have been too vivid.

“Azriel I cannot fly. Why? Why?” She raised her voice. “Why would they do this?” She cried “why?”

Azriel didn’t know what to say. He really didn’t know why. He hated the illyrians, for hurting him, his mother, his sister, his two brothers. He hated them.

“I’m really sorry” he repeated.

“Not your fault Azriel” she sobbed again. But Azriel couldn’t help but feel the guilt. What would happen if he payed more attention? What would happen if he had killed his father earlier?

Cassian just stood there watching them “at least wearing clothes is easier for you” he tried to joke. Azriel immediately shoot him the deadliest look.

Azriel felt her shaking and soon after a joyful sound escaped her lips. She was laughing, she was actually laughing. Cassian smirked victoriously and raised his brows at Azriel who just furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

Cassian sat besides her on the bed “get ready” he said.

Her laugh paused, she gave him a staunched look before he answered with a smirk “I’m flying you around velaris” he said before leaving the room so he, himself could get ready.

Azriel watched her carefully, waiting for her reaction, she just smiled and stood up walking to her closet.

Azriel himself stood up “are you okey?” He questioned.

“I don’t think I’ll ever be okey Azriel. I doubt I’ll ever come to terms with my not having wings, but at least I’m able to experience how flying would actually be, even if it is through cassian or you”

Azriel nodded before leaving the room.

She was delighted, cassian would offer offer to fly her around velaris which made the pain ease, even if it only were for a few hours. She was lucky to have both his and his brother in her life. He’d always make her feel better.

“Ready?” He observed the hulking sized Illyrian standing at her door.She nodded before following him outside of the house. Cassian scooped her up and with a loud thundering noise of his wings, he set of. And she felt free, she forgot about that day, she felt as if flying, she felt free.

[shadowsingersmate]

Hey bestiess! First of all HAPPY PRIDE month, I hope you all have an a AMZING month and i wish you all the best. Be proud of who you are cause nobody else is like you, you are unique and amazing!

School just ended (finally) so from now and on I’ll be a whole lot more active which is exciting. I deeply love writing and school restrained me from doing it so now that such a weight lifted off my shoulders I’ll focus more on this acc.

I have a lot of requests so I’ll be focusing on them for now. I’ll also be writing some of my ideas. EVERY SINGLE ONE of the requests will be answered soon enough (I hope).

Don’t forget to leave your requests.

I write fanfics about

-Azriel

-Cassian

Head cannons for

- azriel

- Cassian

- mor

- amren

- Lucien

- Helion

- nesta

Thank you to everyone who liked my posts and followed me!

[shadowsingersmate]

𝗥𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁: 𝗔𝘇𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗹 𝘅 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘁 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗼𝗽 𝘀𝗶𝗰𝗸 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗮𝘇𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗹 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗵𝗲𝗿

𝗪𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: 𝗻𝗼𝗻𝗲

𝗪𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁: 𝟱𝟳𝟳

You and Azriel had been a couple for the good amount of two years. You first realized about your mating bond six months ago and when you accepted it everything felt to lighten up.

Yes, he was always protective and caring, but after the mating bond the protectiveness went to an another level. Maybe it was the fact that you were human or maybe it was just how it was.

You had been staying in your bed for a whole week, but the sickness didn't seem to back down the headaches got worse and worse by the day and your inability to do simple tasks had started to get under your skin.

Azriel- of course- hadn't left your side for a mere moment since you got sick. "I have more important matters right now, Rhys" he said.

You obviously intended on him continuing his work but he didn't listen.

"Are you hungry? Do you want to take a bath? Are your headaches getting worse? Want me to call Madja?" He paused for a second before he left the room.

You wanted to asnwer, tell him that you were more than fine. It was the ninth day of you being sick and you finally started feeling a little more yourself, more alive.

Not a minuite had passed when the door opened only to reaveal a very worried Azriel and Madja.

Madja sat besides you and started examining you- you as confused as you were about the situation tried to object.

"Don't talk" Madja said softly. Once her hands were back on her side she wore a equally confused expresssion and glanced at Azriel.

"What was the problem you said again?" She asked.

"I don't know, that's why i called you, is she okey?" His brows were furrowed with worry and concern.

Madja sighted sending you and apologetic smile, which You returned. "There's not hung wrong, my lord, she is fine- a lot better actually" she smiled.

Azriel, on the other hand didn't return the smile, he just stared at you. "Oh" was the only thing he said "I'm sorry then I just-" he tried to explain himself.

Madja only huffed a laugh "don't worry my lord, she is okey I can totally understand your concern for the girl" she said before she left the room.

You glanced at him with a look filled with anger and irritation "what was that for?"

"You -I thought that something was wrong" he retorted.

"Azriel I don't need a babysitter you can go do your job and I most certainly can handle myself alone, it's just a sickness"

Azriel lowered his gaze, a sight "I know, I know. It's just, I don't want you getting hurt or being in pain if that matters. Can you blame me for taking care of my mate?"

"No, I don't blame you, but you should relax I'm fine"

Azriel gave an agitated nod before he layed besides you on the bed. His arms were open, inviting you in his embrace.

You didn't think second time, you immediately buried your head in his chest, his scent filling your nostrils.

"Azriel? Does that mean that you will start working tomorrow?" You asked a little too quiet.

"No, not yet love. Go to sleep, rest a bit, ya?" He said before he kissed the top of your head, squishing you in his strong arms.

[shadowsingersmate]

Saw you were taking requests and I’m a slut for any ACOTAR x Reader fluff. Maybe a sweet early morning bit with Cassian with a shy/insecure reader who worries she may not be good enough to be with someone as powerful as him? 🥰

Okey so I’m new with this so I’m gonna try my best, hope you enjoy!

𝗪𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴: 𝗯𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗱, 𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳- 𝗱𝗼𝘂𝗯𝘁, 𝗻𝗲𝗴𝗮𝘁𝘂𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀

𝗙𝗮𝗻𝗮𝗿𝘁: 𝗶 𝗰𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻 𝘄𝗵𝗼 𝗺𝗮𝗱𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝗻𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗱𝗶𝗯𝗹𝗲 𝗳𝗮𝗻𝗮𝗿𝘁, 𝘀𝗼 𝗶𝗳 𝗮𝗻𝘆 𝗼𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝗽𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝗺𝗲 :)

You were always insecure, questioning yourself and your worth had become a daily habit. Maybe it was because your family had always made sure that you’ll feel the worse about yourself, think the worse about yourself.

Thankfully, you had escaped that miserable place. Now you were with your mate- the love of your life, cassian.

You met cassian at Rita’s, his bold self and incontrollable cockiness and loudness captured your interest immediately. He was the one who approached you first. He asked your name and complemented you y/e/c eyes, he said it was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Well, at that time he was dead drunk, swinging around in the bar, laughing at his own sloppiness but you just couldn’t help but feel special, worthy.

It had been two months till you found out that you were mates. You, as happy as you were with the news, couldn’t help but feel that the cauldron might had made a mistake, a 𝑏𝑖𝑔 one. You’d feel like he was too good for you, that you were unworthy of his love and attention. Maybe he knew it too, maybe that’s why he never said that he loved you.

You never shared your thoughts though so they just kept creeping in your mind still. Well, of course you tried to hide those feelings and thoughts from cassian by keeping them as far away from the mating bond.

Today was different. You woke up, the broad sunlight hitting your face. You grunted, Cassian was still asleep you shifted so that you face him and stared at him, admired his intimidating, warriors features, his hair. How peaceful he looked asleep. But then the thoughts that haunted you crept in.

𝗪𝗵𝘆 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗵𝗶𝗺? 𝗛𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝘁𝗼𝗼 𝗴𝗼𝗼𝗱.𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗵𝘁𝘆 𝗼𝗳 𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗼𝗿 𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗼𝗻𝗹𝘆 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗵𝗶𝗺 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗲𝘆 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲. 𝗛𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘂𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝘁𝗶𝗿𝗲𝗱 𝗼𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂.

It was all too much. You loved that male, with every fiber in your body you loved him- you loved him enough to know that you didn’t deserve him, not in the slightest bit. You had made a mistake, he was too good, too kind, too strong, too caring and you were just a quiet insecure girl.

You tried your best to hold back the tears that were threatening to escape, when you heard Cassian’s hoarse voice “morning beautiful” he said. You smiled at him- no, you most definitely did not deserve him.

“Good morning cass” . Cassian smiled at you.

You couldnt take it, laying besides that male, you felt less...

“im gonna go and make breakfast“ you said quietly before you left the bed.

You knew thaf cassian would question the abruptness, you were the kind of person who would stay in the bed, usually cuddle with him and laugh at his jokes but not today.

You headed to the kitchen, you were angry at yourself.

You started chopping fruits.

𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗶𝗯𝗴 𝗵𝗶𝗺 𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝗽𝗽𝘆, 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗼 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗱𝗲𝘀𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗲 𝗵𝗶𝗺, 𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗼𝗲𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂, 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻 𝗶𝗳 𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗶𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗼 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗱𝗲𝘀𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗲 𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲.

More of those malicious thoughts found the way in your head.

Cassian indeed did not deserve you, he deserved something more. Someone like nesta to match his boldness, someone more talkative, someone sure of herself.

You felt the tears breaking free, you couldn’t stop it.

Your attention was captured by your self doubt so much that you only connected to the real world when you felt a pinching pain on your finger.

Looking down you saw blood- lots of it. You cried harder as you grabbed a towel, trying to stop the flooding.

“you okey? I smelled blood“ Cassian’s worried voice echoed in the room.

“Oh yeah I’m fine” you said as steadily as you could.

“Cauldron, how did you do that to yourself? Let me take care of it” he said as he picked you up placing you carefully on the counter.

“Does it hurt?” You shook your head as a record.

He watched you skeptically. “Then why are you crying? Does it has to do with me? Did I upset you?”

You couldn’t hear him, couldn’t stand it. Hearing him so worried of hurting you.

You pushed him away and stood up. You could sense his stillness, his confusion.

“I- darling? What hap-“

“How do you know that the cauldron hadn’t made a mistake back then?” You cut him off “how do we know that we are perfect for each other? That we match? That we deserve each other” the last words were a little less than a whisper.

“Y/n? What are you saying, do you not want this?” You could see the hurt in his expression.

“Of course I do, I do want this more than anything but let’s be honest here cassian, I don’t deserve you, I never did and I never will”

He flinched but he didn’t miss a second. He rushed to you cupping your face with his massive hands “what are those ridiculous things y/n?” He said, his voice as soft as it could get.

“You really thing that I don’t deserve 𝘆𝗼𝘂?” He continued “you’re my mate, my equal, the person the mother chose for me, that 𝗶 𝗰𝗵𝗼𝘀𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗺𝗲. I don’t want better and I could not do better”

“But what if it was-“ he knew what you were about to say, and he didn’t want to hear a lick of it.

“I love you y/n and even if the cauldron has made a mistake I could not be more greatfull for bringing you into my life. You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me” he finished and you swore his eyes were watery.

You couldn’t help but cry harder.

“What’s that about? Did I/“

“No! No, you didn’t say anything bad, I love you too cassian”

[shadowsingersmate]

Hey! I really want to start writing acotar one shots, imagines and some headcanons so if you have any requests live them here!