spacepupislost

[spacepupislost]

Happens in mine all the time lol -☮️

i think the internal happenings between headmates of nearly any plural system would make a good sitcom. i mean, i think we've all had that experience where someone says/does the dumbest shit and an alter does that Look At The Camera thing out of the office.

-🥀

[spacepupislost]

friendly reminder to plurals that you don’t owe the world anything

be messy. be organized. be aesthetic. don’t give a fuck about the aesthetic. be simple. be complicated. be weird. take up space.

you’re allowed to be a person, too.

[spacepupislost]

I think... something I want singlets to understand is that switching, by and large, isn't inherently a bad thing. It can happen at inopportune times, or come with amnesia, or have any number of other complications, yes – but for many of us it's just part of being a system (any negative effects included). Switching is just something that happens, whether it's involuntary, voluntary, or some mixture of the two. You don't have to pity us for switching. You don't have to worry if we tell you that we feel like we're going to switch. It's just something that happens, and if we're telling you, it's because we trust you to know why we may be out of sorts for a bit before we find our footing with the new fronting situation. It's alright. It's just a part of life for most of us, so don't stress about it.

[spacepupislost]

Thin, Pretty, Passing

A girl walks into a room

She's gorgeous, enough to make heads turn

And one thing I notice, is that she is like me

We are one in the same despite being on opposing sides

Yet somehow, people accept her appearance more than mine

It makes sense, I suppose

She's thin

She's pretty

She's passing

Unlike me

A boy with rolls and mediocrity, body exposing my femininity

And there's a difference, between the feminine in my genes versus the feminine in my jeans

But people don't see it and so I lay quiet, not wanting to make a scene

I'm a boy, a boy, a boy

But I want to be pretty too

I want people to see me, the way they see you

They accept you because they expect you

You stand out in a way that's beautiful

But I, I get ignored and branded

With a label that has been handed to me since I was born

And no matter how much I scratch and scratch, this skin is never torn

I want to be pretty the way a boy can be, without people being blind to my identity

I want to be accepted, but I won't be, for I am unexpected

[spacepupislost]

100 likes!

Cool beans

[spacepupislost]

To be seen is not to be loved. But to be loved is to be seen and understood completely.

[spacepupislost]

Some of us just come pre-labeled idk man lol

[spacepupislost]

Maybe you don't remember your trauma, Maybe you're endogenic. You're still a system. You ARE evidence that you exist. The system community is your community.

[spacepupislost]

Shoutout to singlets that accept systems for who they are. Singlets who ask respectful questions and try to understand us. Singlets who do their best to accommodate different headmates and make them feel included. Singlets who listen to what systems have to say. You're so important. Please keep doing what you do.

[spacepupislost]

20 plurality lukewarm takes

(aka I don’t consider these to all be hot takes, because some of them are, in my opinion, warranting of a “well, duh”.)

Not every system has to be miserable to be valid

Endogenic systems are valid

Traumagenic but nondisordered systems are valid

Mixed origins systems are valid

Systems who have no fucking clue where their system came from are valid

Tiny systems are valid

Gigantic systems are valid

Systems that are all Brainmade are valid

Systems that are mostly introjects are valid

Introjects are not their source

Systems whose alters are different as night and day are valid

Systems whose alters are similar are valid

Anti-endos are ableist

Willogenics are not “roleplaying DID”

IT IS NOT FAKING A DISORDER IF YOU ARE NOT CLAIMING TO HAVE A DISORDER.

Plurality should be more informed about— it should be normalized to be accommodating of plurals

Final fusion is not a necessary step of the recovery process

Being a system can be hard. Being a system can be happy. The two can coexist.

You should always respect what different systems want to be called; some like alters. Some like parts. Some like headmates. Whatever their preference, respect it.

HEADMATES WHO SEE THEMSELVES AS PEOPLE ARE PEOPLE.

[spacepupislost]

Thinking about the fact that as a queer, fat, plural, transgender, autistic individual, back in many many ancient societies we would be considered divine. Magical, intertwined with the universe and nature and the gods. Some sort of preist or prophet or mystical being. That’s genuinely beautiful to me. I vote we bring back this energy

-🫅(Roman, he/she)

[spacepupislost]

Literally

[spacepupislost]

Rinse, Repeat

I'm tired constantly, but not in the way that can be fixed by sleep or what I eat

No matter what I do or how happy I seem that tiredness never leaves

My days feel like a 30 minute playlist on shuffle but on loop

Different days still feel the same, the same kind of energy drained

As in bed I lay, thinking

About what? Not a clue

Thoughts pass by like a freeway, yet somehow my mind doesn't feel free

I'm tired, so tired

My woes hang under my eyes like they're a thread, about to snap

My body is a vessel full of smoke that doesn't know how to be expelled

I'm carrying so much emotional baggage yet I'm not going anywhere

I am tired

The only break I'll ever get is during summer, but even that is short lived

Summer time is just a poisonous fruit where the middle is the only part I can enjoy, first half I'm still recovering from the stress of life then the last I'm worried of how my school year will continue

And I know things will only go down from here as coming into adulthood will beat me black blue

I feel like a child on monkey-bars, straining his hands as he's too afraid to move forward but too afraid to let go

Because he knows both options will hurt him

I am tired

So, so tired

Fatigued and lost, living with dwindling desire

...

[this poem is old, but I still felt like sharing it]

[spacepupislost]

Learn

Steel teeth and shattered bone; mud, stained red

Your freedom has become your chain,

Traitorous shackle tying you to the earth

What has the dust done to deserve your life?

Burning rage, screaming fear;

They say leave behind that which makes you weak

Gnaw at your bonds

pain is wisdom

It will not happen again

[spacepupislost]

Written in Blood

Drip, drop

Deep dark ink trails down to my hands

This is the product of me giving in to your command

Pain is my teacher, or so you told

Yet even as the A+ student, my effort was never sold

You've made my wrists grow worn and weary

By cuffs of red and your maternal tyranny

You've turned me into a prisoner

A slave meant to bend to your will with no pay but false praise

You're giving me pyrite and telling me it's gold, it's gold!

And even if your act is sold, I can see all the plotholes

You think I'm dumb, “retarded”, but then boast about how I'm a scholar

I'm not your fucking “daughter” I'm just another medal on your collar.

And the fact you birthed another one shows you just need more power

You're a 16 year old 45 year old girl, who's trapped in highschool, thinking she runs the fucking World

You're not shit but another civilian villain, cutting into my flesh with a hand-me-down knife

It's like this blade is a cursed heirloom, and with it I shall write

About all the sins you've done, and how the title “Mother” isn't your right.

While you're caught up in vain and vanity

Your two children are left grasping for their own sanity and validity

How dare you abuse the power of life as a sacrifice

A bandage for your marriage and the glue for your appearance

It was never about us, it was only for you and your relationships

My blood boils under my skin, heated beyond capacity from your blatant disrespect to the gift given from Gaia herself

May karma hand it to you well, and as you kiss

I'll tell – the world about how you've done me wrong and dirty

How you've made my wrists worn and weary

I'll make sure you feel guilty for your tyranny

I'll be damned if you think you'll leave this world remorse free

You put me in this world, you could've taken me out sooner isn't that what you offered

You've caused me great torment even I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy

And you're the one who taught me how to hate, so do know my hate is great

For you and I alike, we are demons from the same tree

So while you run around pretending to be a saint I'll be the one destined for change

For evolution and growth, while there you stay

Stunted, never changing, and basking in delusion

I'll make it so my revenge for the suffering you pulled into me, will be my own peace that I find within

I will use this drawn blood and turn it into something beautiful

For art represents the artist, and I am beautiful

If there is anything from you I will take, it will be your sense of pride

Despite you building blocks just to break them, you taught me to hold my head up high

And this time it won't be for your convenience, it'll be for mine

So yes, “Mother”, thank you for gracing me with life

And I'll have you know, the last thing sliced will be this vicious cycle rather than a child's dignity, and only then will it burn that wicked knife

[spacepupislost]

GUYANA REP RISE UP!!!! 🇬🇾

GUYANESE MIKU !!!!! by astrumnm

[spacepupislost]

🫰🏽

Here’s my metaphor for systemhood that I tell my singlet friends.

Imagine you’re playing a first person video game. You have the controller, you control your character. It’s a normal first person game. You are an alter, the character is the body. This is fronting.

Other people live with you. Sometimes, they come into the room and sit and watch while you play. They sometimes try to guide you, give you advice on what to do next. They don’t always agree, and they can argue with each other. Other times they scream at you that you’re doing everything wrong and you suck at this game. This is co-consciousness.

Imagine how distracting it would be for people around you to tell you what to do, or to scream at each other or at you, even if they have good intentions. It wouldn’t be easy to focus on your game, would it?

Then sometimes, something happens in the game that prompts you to hand off the controller to someone else so they can play and you get a break. This is (some types of) switching. This can be good.

Other times, someone rips the controller out of your hand or fights you for it. This is (other types of) switching. And sometimes, six other players hook up their controllers, but there’s only one character to play as. So all of you have your controllers, but you’re all trying to play the same character. This is cofronting.

Imagine how difficult that would be. Imagine how hard it would be to try and play a game while someone is trying to take the controller from you, or while six other people are trying to play too.

There are also times that nobody is playing, or you can’t decide who should play. What’s happening to the character in the game? What are they doing if no one is playing? This is dissociation. The character is doing nothing. They’re stuck.

This is the best metaphor I have come up with for being a system. It’s something a lot of people get because they’ve played games before.