#+ it was nice but also just feel like a lot of annoying flippant jokes were made

[lesbiangracehanson]

~~~~~

[starshine583]

New Girl on the Block (14)

(I’m finally baaaaaaaaaaack!!! So sorry this took so long guys, my life’s been CRAZY lately! Hope you all enjoy the update anyway thought! As usual, there’s this series and then a mini series connected to this called Journal Entries. Go check that out too if you prefer!)

Ch. 1 / Ch. 13 / Ch. 15 (ao3)

Chapter 14: Geronimo!

Felix dangled his leg over the pool’s edge, feeling the warm water brush against his skin as he slowly swung it back and forth. His reflection stared back at him, distorted by the ripples that formed from his movement. He didn’t swim in pools often, but when he did, it tended to be soothing for him. The waves rolling back and forth across his body helped remind him to breathe and gave him a sense of presence for where he was in that moment. He could allow himself to get lost in his thoughts while staying present on earth at the same time. It was nice. 

However, while he did enjoy looking at the water, he didn’t quite fancy it being thrown onto him. 

“Watch it!” Felix scowled at Allan and Claude as he scooted back on the pavement. If they continued to splash water like that, not only would Felix get soaked, but the cement around them would as well. Someone could get seriously injured by slipping if they weren’t careful or weren’t paying attention, specifically a certain ravenette that was going to be joining them in a few minutes.

“Aw, come on, Fe.” Claude laughed, swimming towards the blond. Felix moved back a bit more to be safe. “You have a swimsuit on for a reason. Join us! The water feels great!”

“I’ll get in when I’m good and ready.” Felix replied with narrowed eyes.

Claude tisked and swam back towards the deep part of the pool. “Figures. You’re probably waiting on Marinette to get here.”

Felix rolled his eyes. Why would he wait for anyone to go swimming? The girls were taking a tad longer than them, but this wasn’t a formal event. There was no need to-

“Speaking of Marinette,” The brunette continued, “what do you think of Luka? It sounded like they were pretty close.”

Felix held back a sigh, slowly growing more annoyed towards Claude’s strange, incessant questions and comments. For example, why would he think about Luka in any way? None of them had met the guitarist, and the only thing they knew about him was the flippant mention that Marinette had made earlier. A quick mention of dear friend, which was something that they’ve all done before. He’d noted the name, of course, but that was only because he’d fallen into the habit of noting a lot of things when it came to Marinette. Other than that, it was hardly an extraordinary occurrence, yet Claude was acting as though Luka had just joined their group alongside Marinette.

“I don’t have any thoughts on him.” He said. “You can’t have an opinion on someone you haven’t met.”

Claude scoffed. “Oh, please. You have an opinion on everything, Felix.”

“Everything I’ve read about and experience personally.” Felix replied curtly. Why would it even matter if he did have an opinion on Luka?

“Fine, I’ll change the question. What are your thoughts on Marinette’s thoughts about Luka?”

Felix raised a brow. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, what are your thoughts? She was blushing a lot earlier. Do you think she has a crush on him?”

Felix paused. When he first saw her blushing and stuttering in the music room, his mind did turn to that possibility, but blushing and stuttering were two traits that she exhibited quite often. Unless she has a crush on their entire group, along with this Luka person, her becoming flustered towards their teasing shouldn’t mean anything. That did bear a new kind of question, though: What type of person would Marinette like? He’s already established that she had a personal connection to Adrien Agreste- or at least he’s quite sure of it -so that was one basis they could use for reference. What traits did Adrien possess that could be considered attractive to Marinette?

His first guess would be money, fame, and power, except Marinette wouldn’t be that shallow. Plus, she initiated the break up. Most people who were after a certain status wouldn’t break off their chances of getting it. That meant there had to be something else that Adrien possessed that “wooed” her. It could be looks, with Adrien being a model again, or his personality. Considering who they were talking about, Felix guessed the latter, or at least a mix of the two. Maybe she had a thing for blonds and Adrien tended to give her a world of attention. Or perhaps she enjoyed a pair of emerald green eyes and someone that would bring a positive energy to the room, the same energy she often brought herself. Granted, Adrien’s positive energy was mostly fake, but that could be the reason why they broke up in the first place. (If they were together, that is.) Felix had learned over the last few weeks that Marinette deeply appreciates honesty from others as well, which would make sense when one thinks about her struggles with anxiety.

She most likely didn’t have a boyfriend currently, since it hasn’t been mentioned in the month that they’ve known her, but if she did, Felix would probably guess that that person had to be thoughtful, honest, and loving, someone who could calm her worries and give her the stability in life she needed. It was the least she deserved.

As for Luka, though..

“I think you should ask her yourself if you’re so interested.” Felix finally answered.

Claude pulled a pout and sighed. “You’re no fun.”

“Oh, leave him alone.” Allan said, jokingly splashing Claude. “Can’t you let him be a buzzkill in peace?”

Claude laughed and pounced on Allan, splashing more water everywhere. Felix tisked, but before he could chastise them for spreading more water onto the concrete, another voice interrupted them.

“We’re here~!”

The boys stopped fighting, and Felix glanced over his shoulder towards Allegra, who had just entered the pool room. She was wearing her casual, purple bikini and had her hair tied up in a bun, her usual look when swimming. Behind her, Marinette was shuffling in as well, and no sooner did his eyes land on the ravenette than he felt himself freeze to his spot on the cement. 

Her hair had been pulled up into a ponytail, and a frilly, pink bikini adorned her figure. Of course, neither of those things would have groundbreaking.. had she not also been completely ripped.

“Dang!” Claude remarked, taking the words out of their collective mouths. Her entire body appeared to be packed with muscle. It was like she’d decided to get up and complete a series of extreme exercises three times in a row daily! Felix already knew that Marinette was strong, but he didn’t expect her to look like she was chiseled out of rock itself. 

“Marinette, why didn’t you tell us that you were jacked?”

“Is that a six pack?” Allan asked, his jaw falling slack.

A blush bloomed across Marinette’s cheeks, and a bashful expression painted her features as she crossed her arms over her chest. “O-Oh, um-”

“It sure is!” Allegra grinned, wrapping an arm around the girl’s shoulders. “Apparently, Marinette has the same addiction to exercise that you guys do.”

Allan gained enough sense to let out a short laugh. “I wouldn’t exactly call it an addiction-”

“And you didn’t tell us?!” Claude interrupted, betrayal clear in his tone.

Marinette faltered. “I- uh -didn’t think you would be.. interested?”

“Are you kidding?” Claude lifted himself out of the pool to show his own set of abs. “I love exercising! We could have been working out together this whole time!”

“Where do you exercise?” Allan inquired. “I wanna know what you use to get your muscles so defined.”

“Oh! Uh- well -You know..” Marinette looked ready to squirm now. “Just.. random workouts at the house.. I guess.”

Felix furrowed his eyebrows. He didn’t know much about workouts, but from what he overhead from Allan and Claude, they could be time consuming. How did she manage to fit that into her schedule? She seemed busy enough with homework, designs, and helping her parents at the bakery. He supposed she could always rearrange her schedule to make time, but where was the equipment? Surely one couldn’t get muscles like that without using professional equipment, and yet he didn’t see anything remotely close to a weight last time they went to her house. 

“Felix?”

Felix’s gaze flicked to Claude, and he almost groaned when he saw the brunette grinning like a fool again. What ludicrous thing was he going to say now?

“Care to share your thoughts with the class?” He joked. “You were staring at Marinette pretty hard.”

Felix’s eyes widened, then snapped to Marinette. Her blush was a touch darker now, and Allegra was snickering next to her. He hadn’t been paying attention to where he was looking when he zoned out. How long was he staring? Where was he staring?

“I-” He stopped, unsure of what to say. Were his cheeks supposed to feel this warm? “I’m so sorry. I wasn’t-.. I just got lost in thought. I didn’t mean to.. stare.”

Claude snorted behind him. “‘Lost in thought’. Yeah, right.”

Felix whipped around and splashed Claude in the face. Now was not the time for his quips.

“I-It’s fine!” Marinette assured before the boys could fight further. “You didn’t make me uncomfortable or anything. Well, I mean- I just wanted sure that you were- you know -okay..”

Felix glanced back up at her, but for some reason, holding eye contact felt worse. So he shifted on the concrete, resting his elbow against his knee and his mouth in his palm. “Thank you, but I’m fine.”

“Good.” 

Felix barely had time to register Allegra’s comment or her steps as she ran towards him before he was abruptly shoved into the pool. A gasp escaped him as he flailed his arms around to gain stability, and he looked up to glare at Allegra. She was already jumping into the pool after him, though, yelling “Cannonball!”

She resurfaced a second later and threw him a subtle wink as she muttered, “I guess Marinette’s not the only one who needs to cool down, huh?” 

Felix didn’t have a chance to snap back- he wasn’t staring at her that way. It was an honest mistake! -because Marinette plunged into the pool a second later. 

A giggle fell from the ravenette’s lips when she resurfaced. “This water is so warm!”

“That’s because it’s a heated pool.” Claude informed as he swam over to her.

Marinette mouthed a “wow” before saying aloud, “I’ve never been in a heated pool before.”

“Well, now that you have, what do you think?”

“Hm.. I’d say it’s probably better for winter than it would be for summer.”

Allan chuckled. “I can confirm that it is definitely better in the winter.”

“Especially since there aren’t any other pools to swim in during that time.” Allegra smirked. She then splashed them all by making a wide wave with her arm.

“Race you guys to the water slide!”

Everyone began clambering to get to the other side of the pool, while Felix stood there squinting his eyes to avoid getting water in them. Why did he decide to be with such rowdy people?

“You good?” Allan, who had strangely stayed behind, inquired.

Felix nodded. “Allegra didn’t push me hard, so I didn’t scrape the floor.”

A hint of a smile passed Allan’s lips. “I was talking about your little fever earlier. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you blush that hard.”

Felix grit his teeth, feeling the heat rush back to his cheeks, and began swimming away to hide it. “It’s only because you all made it such a big deal.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Allan laughed, swimming after him. “Were we supposed to ignore the fact that you were just staring at Marinette’s abs without saying anything?”

Despite the annoying remark, Felix couldn’t help feeling a tad relieved. At least it was only the abs.

“No, but you didn’t have to make it weird.”

“You’re the only one who made it weird, dude.”

Felix scoffed. “Then, just forget the whole thing! It was an accident, and I got lost in thought, alright? For my sake and Marinette’s, just let it go.”

“Okay, okay.” Allan smiled, briefly pausing in his swim to hold up his hands. “This is me letting it go.. But I can’t promise anything for Claude or Allegra.”

Felix bit back a groan. Great. He could trust Allan to let this pass, and maybe Allegra, but if it was up to Claude?

He was never going to live this down.

~~~~~~

Marinette sat on Allegra’s bed with a smile as she ran her hands over the furry, soft comforter. Allegra sat behind her, carefully pulling on Marinette’s hair to tie it into a braid. Once everyone had had their fill of swimming, they’d decided to take showers and change into pajamas for the evening. The boys went off to their bedroom, while the girls retreated to theirs, and when Marinette finished her shower around fifteen minutes later, Allegra eagerly insisted that they exchange hair styles.

“I’ll wear your pigtails, and you can wear a braid!” She’d said. “It’ll be fun!”

The request was a strange one, but Marinette figured it wouldn’t hurt anything to accept it. So she’d grabbed her ribbons for Allegra and got settled on the bed. Now, they were here, simply doing each other’s hair and waiting for the boys to come back. The silence in the room was palpable, but it wasn’t born from awkwardness, at least. Allegra was merely focused on the task at hand, and Marinette didn’t mind enjoying the quiet while it lasted. Spending time with the group on a constant basis, while fun, could be overbearing sometimes. They were always moving, always talking and laughing together, especially Claude. So the softer moments like this were a nice reprieve.

Actually, Claude’s absence was probably the reason for this new found silence. If she listened hard enough, she’d bet that she could hear him chattering all the way across the mansion. Perhaps she might even catch Felix telling him to pipe down too.

“So,” Allegra began, breaking the comfortable silence between them, “You’ve been attending Rosemary for a good month now. Do you think you’ve got a good handle on it yet?”

Marinette smiled, careful not to turn her head as she replied, “I like to think so. I know where all of my classes are, and I’m pretty sure I’ve memorized the teacher’s names.”

“Oh, good.” She could hear the satisfied smile in Allegra’s voice. “What about our group? Have you gotten sick of us yet?”

A laugh tumbled from Marinette’s lips. “No, of course not. I could never get sick of you guys.”

“Aw~.” The blonde cooed. “Even Felix? He’s a bit of a grump.”

Marinette snorted. “Oh, I don’t think he’s that bad. He just likes to have order in his life, ya know?”

“I do.” Allegra agreed. “But I also think he’s mellowed out a lot since you came around.”

Marinette’s eyes widened slightly, and she glanced to the left in an attempt to look at Allegra without moving. “You think so?”

Allegra hummed. “He’s not nearly as impertinent as he used to be. We had to drag him around everywhere we went with him pouting the entire way, but ever since you joined, he’s been coming to our hangouts without a single complaint. He’s been smiling more too.”

“Don’t get me wrong, we love Felix. He’s just a stay-at-home-and-isolate-yourself-from-all-human-existence type of person. That’s why it surprised us when he took such a shining to you.”

Heat rose to Marinette’s cheeks, and her fingers dug into the fur and feathers of Allegra’s blanket as she began fiddling with it a bit more. Had Felix really been smiling more and doing more things since she came around? Claude did mention Felix being ‘lenient’ with her a few times, but she’d thought he was just kidding. Or at least that Felix was more spiteful towards Claude since Claude was often pushy. Why would he take a shining to her specifically? Marinette didn’t remember doing anything special. Why not open up to the people who had been sticking by his side for two years?

“If he fought so hard against your get-togethers, why did you keep inviting him?” She found herself asking. She loved hanging out with Felix too, but if someone continued to reject her invitations and argue with her on every subject- as Allegra had implied -she probably would stop trying to hang out with that person after a while. 

“Well, it’s like you said,” Allegra shrugged. Or at least, Marinette was pretty sure she shrugged. The bed definitely shook slightly from whatever the blonde was doing. “Felix isn’t really that bad. He may act all tough and annoyed, but he still shows up to our hangouts on time and pays for the lunches when it’s his turn and helps us out when we ask him. We know he enjoys being around us, even if he won’t admit it. We just like giving him a hard time.”

Marinette let out a soft hum. That made sense. She could see the way he made time for the planned visits and study dates and how he’d subtly help out the others in any way he could. 

In other words, Felix didn’t truly need to be dragged around everywhere. He just had a habit of putting up a fuss.

“Plus,” Allegra continued, “we kind of deliberately push his buttons all the time. So I don’t really blame him for snapping at us. Maybe that’s why he warmed up to you faster than he did us.”

Marinette chuckled. Maybe it was. They did tend to tease him a lot. 

She wasn’t sure if Felix was actually more comfortable around her or not- though if anyone were to know it would probably be Allegra -but the fact that he might be brought her a certain sense of pride. Felix’s stone-cold demeanor was strong, and he rarely dropped it for anything. Her being able to help him relax would be a remarkable accomplishment, in her opinion.

“Alright, my turn!”

Marinette jumped at Allegra’s voice and reached up to touch the back of her hair. The braid was indeed finished, trailing all the way down to the top part of her back. It might look strange due to it being short, but she would only have it in for one night. Besides, if it makes Allegra happy, then who cares if she looks a tad silly?

Marinette moved back on the bed to allow Allegra to move up in front of her, and once the blonde got situated, Marinette began gathering up Allegra’s hair to pull it into two ponytails. It wasn’t until she started trying to brush through the hair, however, that she realized how hard the task may be.

“My goodness, Allegra!” Marinette blurted out. “How do you even have this much hair? You’re like a Disney princess!”

Allegra’s hair was not only long, flowing well past her lower back, but also thick. Marinette had a feeling that she could stick her whole hand inside and barely make it past the surface. How was Allegra’s neck not constantly aching from holding it all? Was this why she braided it so often? It had to be. If Allegra allowed her hair to flow freely as it was now, it would get caught on everything and anything in its way. 

Allegra laughed in front of her. “I’ll take that as a compliment, but if anyone were to be a Disney princess here, it would be Claude.”

The comment pulled a laugh from Marinette as well. “Why does that make sense?”

“I know right! He’s even practiced that crying flop thing that all of the princesses do.”

“Seriously?”

“Yes! I still have a picture of it. I’ve decided that he’d either be Aurora or Merida.”

Marinette snorted. “Why’s that?”

“Well-”

A knock on the bedroom door interrupted their conversation, and the girls paused to listen for whoever was on the other side.

“Hey. Can we come in?”

It was Claude, coincidentally the same person they had been talking about.

“Yeah, you’re good.” Marinette called back. “We’re just doing each other’s hair now.”

“And talking about how you’re a Disney Princess.” Allegra added with a grin.

Claude let out an incredulous laugh as he opened the door, revealing Allan and Felix to be behind him as well. “I’m a Disney princess?”

“Oh, yeah. Either Aurora or Merida. You pick.”

Claude scoffed jokingly. “Please. If I were a Disney princess, I would totally be Kuzco, because I’m fabulous and I may not be a princess, but I deserve a crown.”

Marinette burst into a fit of giggles, along with Allegra and Allan, but Felix rolled his eyes.

“Claude, you would be Kuzco because you’re both spoiled and overly dramatic about everything.”

Claude shot him a look. “You know we’re both spoiled right? But it’s fine. I don’t blame you for being jealous of me.”

Felix scoffed. “Jealous-”

“Anyway!” Claude cut him off, prancing over to Marinette. “Are you ready, Mari?”

Marinette's smile faltered. Ready? “Ready for what?”

“You and I are gonna arm wrestle.”

Her eyes bulged. “What?”

“If it’s alright with you.” Allan joined in. “We wanna see how strong you are.”

“Wait, so you all want to arm wrestle with me?”

“Not all of us.” Claude corrected. “Felix is too scared to challenge you.”

“I’m not scared.” Felix said, irritation lacing his tone. “I simply see no point in starting something I know I can’t win.”

“You won’t even try!”

“Why should I? I don’t work out on a regular basis like you do, and I’ve seen the things she can do. You two are going to get thrown across the room as it is. I don’t want to add myself to that list.”

Marinette pursed her lips, feeling another blush coming on. Did he honestly think that she was that strong? (Being Ladybug, she probably was, but-)

“Where are we going to do it?” She asked.

Claude perked up. “You mean you’ll really arm wrestle with us?”

“Sure, I don’t see why not. I just need to finish Allegra’s hair-”

“Oh, no.” Allegra interrupted with a grin. “I can finish the hair. You go arm wrestle.”

Marinette hesitated. “Are you sure?”

“Positive. I wanna see the boys get creamed.”

“Allegra!” Claude shouted indignantly.

“You know you’re gonna~.” She sang in response.

The brunette huffed as he sat on the carpeted floor. “Does no one have faith in us?”

“Honestly?” Allan sat down next to him. “I don’t think I’ll win either. I just want to see how bad I’m gonna lose.”

“Wow.. at least you’re honest.”

Marinette giggled and moved to the floor where she assumed the arm wrestle would take place. Behind her, Felix claimed her abandoned spot on the bed next to Allegra, and she felt their gazes on her back as she laid down in front of Claude, who already had an arm up and an eager smirk on his lips. 

Tentatively, Marinette grabbed his hand. She hadn’t been worried about winning at first, but now that everyone had voiced their belief towards her certain victory, the pressure was starting to weigh on her mind. Losing was much less humiliating when no one believed you would win in the first place. 

“Alright, I’m sure everyone knows the rules.” Allan began, acting as referee. “Elbows have to be touching the ground no matter what, and you can only use one hand. The first hand to touch the ground loses. I’ll count down from three.”

Marinette nodded and situated herself a bit more on the ground. Claude did the same. 

“No hard feelings, right?” The brunette asked lightheartedly.

“3..”

Marinette smirked. 

“2..”

“None whatsoever.”

“1..”

“Especially since you’re going to be the one losing.”

An incredulous laugh burst from Claude’s lips. “Oh!”

“Go!”

They both pushed against each other at the same time, but Marinette managed to put in a burst of speed that slammed Claude’s hand right into the floor. The round was over in the blink of an eye.

“OOOOOOOOH!!!” 

Allegra and Allan both cheered, and Claude looked like he would have fallen backwards from shock had he not been lying down. But nothing made Marinette happier than the proud smirk she caught on Felix’s lips.

“I wanna go again!” Claude announced eagerly.

“No way! It’s my turn to try!” Allan replied, shoving the brunette aside.

Marinette laughed and got situated again, and although Claude was disappointed, he quickly assumed the role of referee for her and Allan. There was another countdown from three, and when the word “Go” was shouted, the two pushed as hard as they could. Allan held up a tad longer since he was more prepared and focused, but in the end, the results were the same. Marinette slammed his hand into the floor with no sense of mercy, just as she had done with Claude. 

“Dude!” Allan laughed, rubbing his wrist. “You’re good at this!”

“How often do you play?” Claude asked.

Marinette tilted her head back and forth. She may or may not play multiple nights a week with Chat Noir when patrols were slow, but that wasn’t something she could tell any of them. 

“Only every now and then.” She decided to reply.

“What! That’s crazy!” Claude exclaimed. “Let’s do it again. I wanna try one more time.”

Marinette gladly obliged, and soon, one more time turned into six more times. Then ten more. The boys just kept shoving each other aside, insisting on playing again, only for her to beat them within a few seconds or so. Each round got admittedly harder for Marinette, but after two years of constantly finding new ways to beat Chat noir, arm wrestling with civilians almost felt too easy.

“Agh!” Claude groaned after getting beat for the twelfth time in a row. “I was so close that time!”

“Yeah.. no.” Allegra said from the bed. “Not even.”

“Do you see now why I didn’t care to try?” Felix remarked.

“Hey, I’m still having fun losing.” Allan smiled. “Move over, Claude, it’s my turn again.”

“Oh, give her a break.” Allegra scolded. “You’re gonna tire her out until your win is guaranteed.”

Marinette silently agreed. She could definitely go longer, but her arm was starting to feel tired, and she didn’t want to end up over-exerting herself, especially when she already did that on a weekly basis as Ladybug.

“Aw, I guess you’re right.” Claude relented, scooting back on the carpet. Allan also backed off, to which Allegra gave a satisfied nod.

“Besides, we have to figure out what we’re doing for next week before we forget.”

Marinette twisted on the floor to give Allegra a questioning look. “What’s happening next week?”

“Valentine’s Day!” The blonde said, as though it were obvious.

“We host a party for the school every year to celebrate it.” Allan explained.

“And now we need to figure out where we’re going to host it for this year.” Allegra finished.

“Oh..” Marinette muttered, trying not to sound too despondent. Ever since Adrien, she’d sort of been actively avoiding things that symbolized love or relationships.. if only to keep the blond out of her mind. “That sounds like a lot of fun.”

“It is!” Claude grinned. “We get a bunch of decorations and snacks and drinks, and then we’ll put on music for people to dance to! Sometimes we even make up fun games to play.”

“And you do this every year?”

“For the past four years.” Allegra confirmed. “Speaking of which, do you want to help us decorate?”

Marinette knew she shouldn’t be surprised towards the request, since they’d invited her to everything else under the sun, but she still couldn’t help raising her eyebrows. “Really? You want me to help?”

“Of course!” Claude smiled. “We’d love to have your artistic touch.”

A soft chuckle passed her lips. The group’s attachment to her had been made clear from all of the get-togethers they invited her to join, but she’d fallen under the impression that they were all still newly made friends. Therefore, being invited to something that sounded extremely personal, such as decorating for a party that they alone hosted, made her realize how highly the group thought of her. Or perhaps they would invite anyone who returned their smiles.

Either way, She felt extremely honored. 

“That’s sweet, but I’m a fashion designer. Not a party designer. They’re a bit different.”

“Yeah, but you like doing crafts, right?” Allan pointed out. “We make a lot of our decorations by hand. It helps the parties seem more personal and gives us a good excuse to hang out over winter break.”

“Not that we really need one.” Allegra added.

Marinette mouthed a ‘wow’ before saying, “You guys really go all out.”

“Yeah, we do.” Claude smirked. “Otherwise, who’d wanna come?”

“That’s why we need to get a reservation somewhere by tomorrow. So we have time to prepare.”

“Did you guys have a place in mind?”

“I have a few, actually.” Allegra replied. “My main preference is the Mandarin Oriental, but there’s also a few other options like Ritz Paris, Bateaux Parisiens, or Les Pavillons de Bercy.”

Marinette nodded thoughtfully, though she’d really only heard of one of those places. Was it bad that she didn’t know about the other three? 

“Have we done the Mandarin Oriental yet?” Allan asked.

“Not that I remember.”

“I don’t want to do Bateaux Parisiens.” Felix spoke up. “Being on a boat with that many people would be dreadful.”

“Aw, what?” Claude said. “Boats are awesome!”

“Not when they are packed to the brim with people. You’d barely be able to move an inch without running into somebody, and there would be no escape once you’re out on the water.”

“Well, fine, if you’re going to put it that way..”

“I say we do Mandarin Oriental.” Allan remarked. “I trust Allegra’s judgement on the setting.”

Allegra smiled at that, and the other two boys shrugged.

“I’m fine with it as long as I can get some air at some point.” Felix said.

“I guess I’m okay with it too.. But we should try to do a boat next year.”

Allegra shot Claude an indulgent smile. “I’ll see what I can do.”

“Who’s going to call and reserve the tables?”

“I can have Dad do it.” Allegra answered. “We want him to reserve it for two days so we have time to put the decorations in, right?”

“Yeah, like usual.”

“Alright. We can check out the room we’re reserving tomorrow to see which types of decorations we need.”

“Great!” Claude chirped. “Does that work for you, Mari?”

Marinette smiled. She may not be fond of love or romance at the moment, but if throwing a Valentine’s Day party meant spending more time with these wonderful people, she would absolutely do it. 

“Perfectly.”

“Awesome.” Allegra said, satisfied. “Now that that’s settled, we can go back to messing around. What do you guys want to do?”

“Besides arm wrestling?” Claude joked as he eyed Marinette.

“Besides arm wrestling.”

“Why don’t we play hide and seek?” Allan suggested. “We haven’t played that with Marinette yet.”

Marinette gasped. Playing hide and seek in a mansion as big as this one? How had she not considered that before! 

“Yeah, that’s a great idea!”

“Absolutely!”

“..I suppose.”

“What do you say, Mari?” Allegra smiled. “Wanna play?”

Marinette didn’t even have to think about her answer. “Yes, please!”

Allan chuckled and leaned back on his palms. “Great. Who’s going to be it?”

The group paused for a split second. Then, all at once, a chorus of ‘not it!’s rang out in the room.

“Claude, you were the last one!”

“What? No way! It was totally you!”

Allegra shot up from the bed. “Nope! It was you! Start counting to 150!”

“But let us turn off the lights first.” Allan added as he got up.

“Oh, no. I’m counting now.” Claude replied with a sinister grin. “So you better hurry to turn the lights off as you go.”

Felix was up now too, and Marinette, in her giddiness, shot up from the floor with a squeal to follow him.

“Claude Herolds, you better wait for us to-”

“One!” The brunette yelled over Allegra.

“Claude-”

“Two!”

When it was clear he didn’t intend on stopping, everyone scrambled to get out of the bedroom door. They got stuck for only a moment, pushing against each other to be the first one out, then they struggled free and scattered.

Marinette stopped at the top of the steps, her eyes darting around the parts of the mansion she could see. There were so many rooms, so many open spaces, and she still hadn’t memorized where everything was, let alone where good hiding places could be. Where should she even start?

A hand gently grabbed her arm.

“This way.” Felix said in a hushed tone, lightly tugging her down the stairs. “Downstairs is more open for when you need to move to a new hiding place.”

“That’s allowed?”

He nodded. “It’s why we turn the lights off. I’ll show you a good room to start.”

“That’s why it surprised us when he took such a shining to you.”

A smile tugged at the corner of Marinette’s lips. “Thanks.”

With the blond’s assured guidance, Marinette’s steps held a tad more confidence, and as Claude’s countdown lowered to 125, the two bolted for a room to hide.

tag list:  @artbyknigit @athena452 @nickristus-dreamer @throneoffirebreathingbitchqueen @arsaem @abrx2002 @neakco @pawsitivelymiraculous @too0bsessedformyowngood @nathleigh @lusicing @officiallydarkgeek @all-mights-asscheeks @tbehartoo @woe-is-me0 @raeuberprinzessin @lazuli-11 @miss-chaos27 @trippingovermyfeet @sadpotatoondrugs @ladybug-182 @jaggedheart11 @marinahrasauce @i-need-blog-ideas @thewheezingbubbledragon @crazylittlemunchkin @unabashedbookworm @moonystars14 @sunflowers-and-mooncakes @2confused-2doanything @magnificentcrapposts @moonnette @nickristus-dreamer @vixen-uchiha @casual-darkness @luxmorningstarr @jjmjjktth @kaithehero @itsme1598 @theymakeupfairies @xjaccyx @miraculous-ninja @miraculouspenta @swiftie-miraculer13 @justafanwarrior @all-mights-asscheeks @ira-sairain @lookatthestars1 @dahjokester @blissful-passing @solangelo252 @canivialemonsquints07

[amlovelies]

what desire will make foolish people do

@wayhavenmonthly​ Fall for Unit Bravo

Day 5: game

pairing: Mason/f!oc Serena Willis (not a detective)

warnings: not technically smut, but super suggestive also smoking and foul language

words: 2779

read on ao3

A/N: this is part of my Au and takes place before the scene I posted for day 2: Liability. I’ve posted parts of this before as “excerpts from a fic I’ll never write” guess I’m a liar. This is all pulled from different parts of the story because I liked the way I could use them to fit the theme, so there are some slightly awkward bits where I edited it to make more sense. 

Round 1

               The cool spring air outside the warehouse helps to clear my head. The last few weeks have been hard, and as much as I think I am adjusting to my new life and role here, there are still days when it’s harder. Days when I miss home and feel so out of my depth it’s almost a joke. I lean back against the door and close my eyes taking deep breaths.

               “Are you planning on blocking the door all night?”

               My eyes snap open at the growled question. Great, Mason. Of all the members of Unit Bravo I’ve been unable to really connect or understand him. He’s made it clear he thinks I’m useless and I’m surprised he bothered to waste a whole sentence on me rather than just grunting. I watch him pull out his damn near ubiquitous pack of cigarettes.

               “Can I have one?” I ask almost surprising myself. I haven’t smoked in years, but maybe it’ll take the edge off.

               “Sorry,” Mason says as he pulls a cigarette from the half full pack in his hands, “I’m all out”

               “So you’re the only one who gets to use self-destructive behaviors to make them feel better?” I ask in what I hope isn’t a petulant tone.

               “Isn’t self-destructive if I’m immortal. Besides, I’ve got something I can give you that’ll make you feel much better than a smoke would.”

               I’m glad it’s getting too dark so I don’t have to see the smirk on his face. It’s too bad it doesn’t affect his vision because I’m sure he can see the blush that paints my cheeks even as I’m rolling my eyes at his much too obvious come on. I’d heard rumors about Mason’s “charms,” but this is the first time he’s ever tried to use them on me. No matter what I think of his personality, he is a dangerously handsome man and I hate how flustered the comment makes me feel even if his flirting has more in common with a battering ram.

               “Or I could just go to the store and pick up my own pack. Sounds a lot more satisfying.” I say as I push off the door and make to walk past Mason. I don’t actually want a smoke that bad, but I also don’t want to back down in front of him.

               “Fine, don’t say I never did anything for ya.” Mason scoffs and I yelp as I’m hit in the chest with the pack. I eagerly pull one out and pass the pack back to him. I’m a little skeptical about his sudden altruism, maybe he really is trying to get me into bed.

               “Where’s your lighter?” I ask.

               “Never asked for a lighter, Sweetheart, and it seems I’ve lost mine.” He says, voice smug and mocking. So much for my victory. “Maybe you should pat me down, see if you can find it.” He adds opening his arms wide to give me access.

               “I think I’ll pass.”

               “Your loss.” He replies as he leans against the wall.

               I sit for a moment tapping the cigarette against my leg trying to figure out how to regain the upper hand. Or maybe not even the upper hand so much as just to stay in the game. Because this is some sort of game to him, and the last thing I was going to do was let Mason win this round of whatever the hell this is.

               A hazy memory resurfaces of younger wilder nights, and I start speaking before I lose my nerve.

               “Don’t worry, Sunshine.” That gets his attention and a scowl replaces the smirk he’d had only a moment before. “I know how to take care of myself. It’s not the first time I’ve had to get creative to get what I want.” I say in what I hope is a low and teasing tone, but I worry sounds like I have a head cold. I close the space between us.

               I raise my cigarette to my lips and wait until he begins to pull another drag from his. “All I need is for you to stay still.”

               I move forward on my tiptoes until the unlit end is pressed firmly against the glowing ember of Mason’s cigarette. We are so close and alarm bells start ringing in my head. His presence envelopes me. My senses are overwhelmed by him. The scent of smoke and sandalwood is heady and enticing, especially combined with the heat I can feel pouring off his body. God he’s good looking. I have to remind myself to breath, to inhale or otherwise this won’t work and I’ll just be trapped under the intense gaze of his grey eyes.

               To my relief, it ignites and I’m able to move away from him. I put some space between us, and take a thankful drag from the cig hoping it will ease my now rattled nerves. It doesn’t, and to be honest I’m not sure why I used to enjoy this so much. I steal a glance over to where Mason stands with a wry smile, his eyes studying me. I’m not sure what he’s looking for.

               “Well thanks for the smoke.” I say with an attempt at a flippant tone. I don’t wait for a response; I turn on my heel and walk off toward the fence. I can hear the door open and I breath a sigh of relief to find myself alone once more.

 Round two

               I guess I earned some sort of respect in Mason’s eyes after the cigarette incident. Oh, sure it was mostly him making innuendos and propositioning me, but it was a hell of a lot more than the monosyllabic grunts that I was used to.

               I tried not to read to much into the flirting. That he wanted to sleep with me I didn’t doubt. I also had heard enough rumors, and been subtly warned by Nate, that I knew it wasn’t really personal. Mason wanted to sleep with everyone. Besides I found myself enjoying our little verbal sparring matches. Considering the fact that he kept doing it he didn’t seem to mind or maybe he just viewed me as a challenge.

               Mason manages to corner me in one of the warehouse’s many labyrinthine hallways. I had been avoiding him all day. The night before I had woken up from vivid dreams that definitely didn’t involve the incredible annoying vampire in front of me. As much as I try to play unaffected by his seduction attempts, I know it’s a lie, and my subconscious did not come to play last night.

               “I don’t know if you’re aware of this, Sweetheart, but our bedrooms share a wall.” Mason leans forward closing the already small gap between us a wolfish smile on his face, “and my hearing is very good.”

               He pauses and I try not to be entranced by the sight of his tongue running over his top lip. I’m pretty sure I know where he is going with this and I wonder it is possible to die of embarrassment.

                “Not that there was much to hear last night. I’d be glad to show you how best to use your fingers,” he raises one hand to push his hair back drawing my attention to his well-shaped and surely dexterous hands.

               It takes all my self-control to hold his gaze and I’m secretly grateful for the solid wall pressed against my back. You could probably boil a pot of water with the heat pouring off my face. The thought that he had heard my clumsy fumbling last night is perhaps the most mortifying thing I could imagine. He probably couldn’t wait to use this against me. At least he doesn’t know I was thinking about him. After all everyone masturbates. The only part of this that is really getting to me it knowing that there is some part of me that wants to see exactly what those hands can do. Not the rational part obviously, but still I’d be foolish to continue to pretend it’s not there.

               At least he had waited for a moment when we were alone. I could only imagine the field day Farah would have with this, or maybe he was afraid of Nate’s disappointment. He looks so pleased with himself and I would give almost anything to wipe that smirk off his stupid handsome face. I have to think of something quick.

               “Listening at walls? Are you really getting that little action?” His smile drops and I know I’ve picked the right counterattack.

               “You know I don’t really think I should be the one you’re concerned with,” I smile and place a friendly hand on his shoulder. “Maybe Dinah can set you up on a bind date. I’m sure she knows some nice girl who is just frothing at the mouth to reform a bad boy and teach him the meaning of love” I gaze up with what I hope is an innocent expression.

               The angry growl that he response with is music to my ears. I try and keep the glee from my face, but as he stomps away, I can’t help but congratulate myself on another victory in what-ever-the-hell game it was that I somehow found myself playing with him.

 Round 3:

               “You suck at this.” Mason says as he once again knocks me on my ass. He isn’t even breaking a sweat while my gasping attempts to catch my breath seem to be echoing in the empty training room.

               I push away the hairs that are sticking to my sweat drenched face and give him a withering glare. He just laughs. How kind of him to make sure I want to hit him, not that I’ve managed to land one yet.

               “Always such a gentleman, Sunshine,” I say as I haul myself back to my feet. “Considering how charming you are it must be a miracle that I haven’t just fallen into bed with you yet.”

               He quirks a brow and gives me a look that I know well enough by now to know is trouble, “yet?”

               I inwardly curse my poor word choice or Freudian slip or whatever. Not that I’d found myself thinking about him late at night more and more, or appreciating the long lean lines of his body, or wondering if he actually had to skills to back up all his bravado.

               “Fuck off, Mason” I say as I roll my eyes and sink into a crouch ready to continue our sparring. It’s a petulant response, not at all keeping with the game we’ve been playing. A game which mostly consists of me trying to not let him unnerve me and find new and exciting ways to drag the very dangerous vampire who is has spent the last few hours kicking my ass.

               He circles me, his movements lazy and languid. When he moves it’s sudden and with a speed I can’t follow. Before I know what’s happening, he’s behind me, his breath ghosting over my neck, “I’d much rather fuck you.” He says with a laugh.

               Summoning ever bit of agility I possess, I turn and swing, but there’s nothing but empty air and his laughter. I overextend myself and have to stumble forward a few steps to avoid falling over. Once I’ve regained my balance, I flip him the bird.

               He just grins and lands a stinging hit to my right side. “Do you know what the problem is Sweetheart?”

               “Oh? Enlighten me.”

               He moves in a blur, and I find myself pressed up against him chest to chest. My arms are held secure behind my back. His face is only inches above mine, his well-shaped mouth curled in a taunting smirk. This close I can clearly see the freckles that dust his checks. He’s breathtaking, and I hope he attributed the rapid increase of my pulse to a fight or flight instinct of being trapped rather than his proximity.

               “Your body gives you away.” His voice is almost a whisper. A fierce blush erupts over my cheeks. Damn his stupid vampire super senses.  He’s so smug and enjoying this. I rack my brain for a way to turn this around, but it’s hard to think clearly when I can feel the lean lines of his body pressed against me, and I can’t help but wonder how far those freckles extend over his body. I have to act quick, maybe I can distract him.

               I tilt my head up to meet his gaze and moisten my lips. His eyes dart towards the action and I press forward against him. I’m playing with fire. This is a stupid idea, but that has never stopped me before.

               “What exactly is my body telling you now?” I ask my voice breathy, low, and inviting. Before he can answer I close the space between us and press my lips against his. I try not to think about the feel of his lips against mine.

               His hands on my arms loosen in surprise. I know that it’s now or never, but I hesitate. No small part of me what’s to stay in this moment surrounded and overwhelmed by him. But that would mean he wins. So, I pull my arm back and strike a weak jab to his right side. He moves back from me with a grunt

               . “Not afraid to fight dirty. Maybe there’s hope for you yet. “He says with a nod before turning and leaving me standing along in the center of the training room.

               I know I should be savoring my victory, but all I can taste is Mason on my lips.

  Match

               It’s a little after midnight and I’m standing in front of Mason’s door. I’ve spent the last few hours tossing and turning in a vain attempt to sleep. I keep replaying what happened in the training room: the feel of his body against mine, the brief taste of his lips, the feel of his breath ghosting over my neck. All these months of trading innuendos and hot tense moments seem to have come to a head and I feel consumed by wanting. It was a line I shouldn’t have crossed, even if it did let me land a punch, but now that I have, I feel like I’m falling towards the inevitable conclusion. And would it really be the worst thing? It’s been so long since I’ve been intimate with someone. Maybe it’s better to do it this way knowing that it’s just fun?                

               So now I’m standing in front of his door daring myself to knock. I mean he’ll probably be insufferable after this, but at least I’ll get laid? We both want this. It doesn’t have to be a big deal.

               In the end, he saves me from having to knock. I jump a little, startled out of my deliberations, when the door swings open. His shirt is off and my eyes trace over his form. Freckles dot his skin and a patch of hair curls over his well-defined chest. Fuck he’s hot.

               “Is it yet already?” He asks with a smirk his eyes tracking over my body. I’d only thrown on my bathrobe before following my libido to his door.

               I take a deep breath and swallow the snarky comment I want to make. “Guess it is,” I say as I push past him into the darkened room.

               He closes the door and turns to face me.

               “You sure about this?” he asks taking a step closer to me.

               I step closer as well only a foot or two separate us. If I wanted to, I could reach out and run my fingers over his chest tracing the line of dark hair to where it disappears under his skinny jeans. And god knows I want to.

                “I am. Are you? You’ve talked a big game. Afraid you won’t perform to expectations?” I ask with a smirk.

               His laugh is dark and low and confident and turns something within me molten. He closes the space between us, pulling my body flush against his. I’m intensely aware of the thin fabric of my robe as the only barrier between us.

               “Not even remotely.” His voice is velvet and sends a shiver through me.

               Then his lips are on mine and all I can sense is Mason: the smooth skin of his back under my hands, the wicked glint in his grey eyes, the heady scent of him-sandalwood and smoke, the taste of him on my lips, and the way he growls as nips his way down my exposed neck. He walks us backwards toward his bed and I know I am lost.

tagging: @morgans-ass-freckles @specialistagent-morgan @bionicgrapejuice and @agentnatesewell

[kingreywrites]

Veil

Words count: 3136

Eugene Appreciation Week Day Three: Angst

Summary: Stupid flower with its stupid spores that felt like an open flame on his face for a second, before making him think that it was over until he realised that his eyes were, in fact, open. Stupid sword that fell in the flower, stupid him for falling after it, stupid Cass for being annoying and stupid- well not stupid, his Sunshine could never be, but tiny bit annoying Rapunzel for forcing them to go search for food together, so they could have a bonding experience.

[Set at some point in season 2]

Note: Not too angsty overall but there are references to Eugene’s death in Tangled!

Read on ao3

@fishskiin

"But-"

"For the last time Fitzherbert, yes, your hair is fine," Cassandra growled, tugging more harshly at his arm and nearly sending both of them tumbling to the ground.

She muttered an unconvinced "sorry" and Eugene chuckled weakly, knowing that his attempts to lighten the situation up were not appreciated right now. Cassandra was a tough public to please, however today, it wasn't about her. It was about him, and himself only, or, more precisely, about not freaking out more than he already was. He stayed silent approximately two seconds and a half, before feeling like he might choke in the darkness.

"And my skin?" He asked breathlessly, trying very hard to sound flippant and failing miserably. "Is my skin still well-hydrated? I mean, I know my skincare routine is perfect but it needs some touch up during the day you know, these looks take work to-"

"One more word and you'll be mute too, I swear."

Eugene gulped and shut up. He knew that Cassandra didn't mean it like that - knew that she was harsh, because that's how she dealt with situations she didn't like, but that her face was probably creased in concern and worry. Well, he could only guess that part, since he couldn't see anything at all, but after years of her forced company, including nearly one on the road together, he felt like he knew her well.

Which is why he knew she wouldn't really make him mute. That didn't mean the possibility, or even the simple mention of it, didn't make him feel dread right in his bones.

He was blind. Not forever, he hoped, but for now, in broad daylight, he could only see darkness and he hated it. So maybe he had started to nag at Cass about the state of his clothes, his hair, or his skin, because egotistical and self-centered funny guy was an easy role to fall back on when he didn't know what to do with his emotions, but who could blame him? He was blind. And it wasn't even his fault. Or, not entirely.

"I told you that big flower was bad news," he sighed in exasperation, hoping that he was rolling his eyes like he felt he was, "but did you listen?"

"I'm sorry but who told you to stay back?" Cassandra snarked in answer, her hold tightening on his arm. "Yes, that flower was dangerous, but I knew how to get close enough and get my sword back without problems, you decided to fall right face first in it!"

"Well you shouldn't have lost your sword in the first place!"

"Are you kidding me? You threw my sword in the flower!"

"You attacked me with it!"

"I didn't attack you, I wanted you to shut up, I was threatening you nicely!"

"Threa-threatening me nicely?!" Eugene sputtered. "That doesn't mean anything!"

"It does!" "Does not!" "It does!" "Does not!"

Eugene's feet caught in a protruding root and he lost his balance, crashing into Cassandra and taking them both down with a yell. He was quite glad, for a second, to not be able to see the position they were in, because he really didn't want to see the glare she was probably throwing him as he laid on her. He could still feel his skin tingling, and he put it under the "Cassandra has psychic powers" box he kept in his head. (One day, he would have enough evidence to reveal the dragon lady for the terrifying creature she really was deep down.) He rolled to his side, his brain scrambling to reconcile the absolute darkness and his other senses' signals, but he felt Cassandra get up next to him.

He could hear her brush the dirt off her clothing in silence, the only other noises being the wind in the leaves and the random birds' chirping.

"Need help getting up?" she asked gruffly and Eugene nodded, lifting his hand up vaguely until she took it and pulled.

He felt like he should be brushing the dirt off his clothes too, but he couldn't see where it was needed because he couldn't see anything because he was blind. Stupid flower with its stupid spores that felt like an open flame on his face for a second, before making him think that it was over until he realised that his eyes were, in fact, open. Stupid sword that fell in the flower, stupid him for falling after it, stupid Cass for being annoying and stupid- well not stupid, his Sunshine could never be, but tiny bit annoying Rapunzel for forcing them to go search for food together, so they could have a bonding experience.

Their only bonding was made through teasing and making faces at each other like preschoolers, not hunting.

"Oh god," Cassandra breathed out suddenly, stopping in her tracks, "what are we going to say to Rapunzel?"

Eugene laughed, happy that she was the one who broke the silence this time. "Well, she's going to be worried enough about me that she'll forgive my participation in the accident. You however…"

"It's not my fault you go searching for trouble!" Cass protested. "The whole flower incident could have been avoided if you'd just been careful!"

The argument started up again, and they bickered the whole way towards the caravan. Eugene didn't notice, but Cassandra managed to distract him thoroughly from his current situation, their teasing and mean remarks a scenario he knew very well. That way, he didn't have to take too much notice about the careful way she guided him, or the fact that he kept stumbling around, or even the rebellious wick of hair that claimed its freedom as soon as he lost his sight. (Cassandra refused to be the one to tell him that though, for fear that he would ask her to style it back.)

"Here goes," Cassandra whispered, his only warning that they were back before Lance screeched "Oh my god are you holding hands?!"

They had a lot of explaining to do.

------

The situation positively sucked. Eugene hated being helpless, he hated being babied and the only person he ever wanted to be vulnerable with was Rapunzel - Lance too, possibly, and a case could be made for Cassandra, but certainly not Hookfoot or Shorty. For that only, this day had not been the greatest in his life; he was blind and sad, and the third Lance's surprise hug special nearly gave him a heart attack, and Cassandra nearly drowned him when they tried to wash his eyes thoroughly, and that was only part of what happened today.

There was one thing that was good, however and, as always in Eugene's life, it was Rapunzel.

She had took the whole thing way better than he thought she would. She had not panicked like the others, she had not questioned him as if he had any ideas of what was happening, she had just… been here. All day, right at his side, making jokes and soothing him when she felt him freaking out and, all in all, being the best human being on Earth - which Eugene knew she was, but every day, he fell a little more in love with her. Rapunzel knew exactly what he needed, probably better than even himself.

"Aren't you worried?" he asked at some point, when they were both left alone in the caravan and he was laying his head on her lap, while her fingers carded gently through his hair. It wasn't an accusation, really - but he was worried, he even felt sick to his stomach and she was just… so calm.

"I'm terrified, Eugene," she answered softly, her brute honestly surprising him, "but you're terrified too. I may not be able to do anything about your eyes, but I can help you feel better, so that what I'll do."

He hummed, and they fell back into comfortable silence, only interrupted but Rapunzel's scratching in her journal. He was so glad for her, she could probably never get how much; she had managed to take all the dread that inhabited him and turned it into warmth and love. If Eugene had to live his whole life blind, what would break his heart the most was to not be able to see her ever again. How could he live with only the memory of her smile, or the sparkle in her eyes, or the majesty she could exude as well as she did playfulness, or- or- He didn't need to see Rapunzel to love her, but he wanted to see each and every of her expression, he wanted to be able to map the freckles on her skin and to bear witness of every changes in her body. He wanted… He…

"You okay?" Rapunzel asked gently, and he could practically hear the worried smile on her lips.

"Yeah," he breathed out silently, not sure of what exactly she could be seeing in his face that made her worry. "I'm only tired."

It wasn't an excuse - he felt weary and exhausted, as if he had spent the whole day running. He thought that, maybe, being on high alert constantly had a way to make someone tired, but he wasn't sure. His head was also starting to ache, but he didn't want to worry Rapunzel more than she already was, so he only hoped it would go away on its own.

"Oh!" Rapunzel exclaimed, "Wait!"

She extracted herself from under him and, before he could protest, went over him and out of the bed. He could hear her move around and he wasn't sure of what she was doing, but he restrained himself from calling out to her - he was pretty sure she wouldn't leave like that. He tried to raise himself on his arms but it still felt very disorienting to only rely on his knowledge of the place, so he abandoned the endeavour and fell back. What must he look like, on his back on a bed, eyes open and unseeing as if he was a fish? And he couldn't even check his hair - though, with Rapunzel's carding, he had a pretty good idea of the disarray it must be in.

"I'm back!" Rapunzel said joyfully, startling him as she lightly pushed at him. "Come on, let's get you under the covers."

It was awkward, because he didn't really understand her cues, but they managed to get him tucked into bed. Then, as he had hoped, Rapunzel slipped to his side, automatically snuggling him.

"Oh, I like this," Eugene sighed, contempt.

"I like this too," Rapunzel murmured, kissing his ear sweetly.

Eugene wondered if it was as dark for Rapunzel as it was for him - he didn't even know if night had fallen. He didn't even know the time.

"Sunshine," he started, not sure where his sentence was going. His hand wandered blindly toward her, until it found her stomach and settled here. "What if-"

"Hey," she interrupted, her hand going over his, "if you really want to talk about this, we can but… Maybe we should sleep. You're clearly exhausted, I am too and… We can be worried tomorrow?"

He could hear the nervousness in her voice, as if she was worried she had crossed a line but, going by the relief he felt, she had once more guessed exactly what he needed right now. Taking a risk, he carefully went closer to her face and kissed her, his lips ending on her nose instead of her lips - good enough. She giggled, and put a hand on his neck to guide him to her, and their lips finally met.

God, he loved her. So much.

It didn't take him long to fall asleep when he was warm and safe inside the arms of his dream.

------

Eugene was cold. He was cold, and he couldn't see anything but the dark veil falling in front of his eyes, blocking Rapunzel from his sight while he tried desperately to get to her. She was talking, begging really, promising to go with the monster that called itself her mother is she could only save his life and- she couldn't. He called her name weakly, trying to crawl to her, ignoring the terrible pain in his side or the darkness, his mind only on her, on this girl that saved his life in a day, who liked Eugene more than Flynn, who was…

"Rapunzel," he coughed, feeling the metallic taste in his mouth and not caring about what it meant for him.

Then, before he realised, he was shackled to the stairs and bleeding out, the world dark except for her hair. Rapunzel was telling him that everything would be alright, but he knew it wouldn't, because it couldn't be when she was suffering. He tried to push her away, begged her to stop, but he couldn't see her, he could barely move and she escaped his attempts easily. His side was burning and his eyes were too, as he frantically searched for a piece of mirror to cut her hair off.

He didn't find it. He couldn't look for it, he couldn't do anything, because he was cold and blind and dying, and he needed to save Rapunzel but he couldn't. She gathered him in her arms, singing her damned song, and he called out to her again without success. If anything, the song only made him colder, only made the world darker, and he thought he would be swallowed whole by it, Gothel's laugh echoing sharply off the walls in his mind. He was losing Rapunzel, and he was dying again, but those two events shouldn't coexist and he knew it. He tried to scream her name, but his voice wasn't working, and he could only hear the healing incantation, and the desperation behind these words.

If only he could see her- if only he could tell that she didn't need to do that, that she was his dream, were his dream, but that she deserved to live free and find her true parents and- and-

"Eugene!" Rapunzel yelled and he startled awake with a gasp, his grip tightening around her waist before he realised he was crushing her. "It's okay, it was just a dream," she soothed, taking his hands in hers, but he didn't answer, he only tried to get his breathing under control.

He still couldn't see her. He could feel her hair brushing against his stomach as she was leaning over him, and he knew it was long and blond but Gothel's laugh was still ringing in his ears and he couldn't see her and- it was as dark as when he died. He had been cold and empty, swimming in shadows until he heard her voice and felt her light as she brought the sunshine back in his life. And now, he couldn't see her and…

"You need to breathe Eugene," Rapunzel instructed gently, her voice soft and controlled, even if he could still hear the tremors in it. One of her hands went to his hair, brushing a sweaty lock out of his forehead, as if it would hinder his vision, and Eugene let out a stressed laugh.

"Sorry, I- Sorry," he mumbled after some time, his eyes desperately trying to meet hers even when he couldn't see them.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," she whispered, still touching him gently. "You… Do you want to talk about it?"

Did he? Eugene wasn't sure. He still felt terrified and he knew it wasn't going to go away, especially not when he was still blind, but having Rapunzel near him had already calmed him down enough, didn't it? She was waiting patiently for his response and, once again, he wondered what she could be seeing on his face - and what he would be seeing on hers, if he could see it. She was probably concealing the worry in her voice much more than he realised.

"I… I was back at the tower," he admitted, surprising even himself. She breathed out his name with sorrow, but let him talk. "I was dying and… I couldn't see you. I couldn't see anything and- you were singing but you didn't realise that I was already- that I…"

He didn't finish his sentence. Rapunzel hugged him tight anyway, and he hold her back, both seeking comfort in each other. He didn't tell her about not finding the mirror fragment, because that was a "what if" he never managed to get over - he preferred not to think about the world in which it happened. Rapunzel was safe, and she had saved him too and, nightmares aside, they had left this behind. More or less.

"What time is it?" He whispered, face still pressed in the crook of her shoulder.

"Night," was the mumbled answer, punctuated by a yawn that made him chuckle lightly. "You still want to sleep?"

Honestly, Eugene wasn't sure, but he nodded anyway, because Rapunzel certainly needed it. They stayed like that, entangled with each other, and it wasn't long until he could hear her breathing deepen, her weight warm and heavy in his arms. He smiled, and prepared himself for a long sleepless night - before falling asleep again, exhausted and safe in their embrace.

For the umpteenth time in his weird life, he was woken up by a cold tongue in his ear and - quite frankly - shrieked, to the sound of Pascal and Rapunzel's laughs. She had gone out of bed at some point, but went to kiss him quickly, before returning to her journal.

"Good morning!"

"G'd m'rn'g" he mumbled, falling back pathetically, never the morning person that she was. "Wha-" he trailed off, eyes widening considerably as he took in his environment.

His blurry and still a little dark at the edges but very visible environment.

Eugene got up quickly, turning towards the blond blob that was currently Rapunzel and felt a grin spread on his lips almost against his wishes. She wasn't looking at him right now, so he took advantage of that and rushed to hug her, drawing a squeak and a delighted laugh as she realised that his vision was coming back.

It took two days for it to be completely back to normal, but blurry was better than nothing so Eugene got up to mischief for the time being. And, when his eyes were as good as before, and when he had kissed Rapunzel a lot and gazed into her eyes like the love-sick fool that he was, he wasn't that surprised to see her smile turn into her Princess' frown.

"Now, Eugene, we'll have to talk about not throwing ourselves at dangerous and unknown flowers for nothing," she announced sternly.

He grimaced and glared at a snickering Cassandra, promising himself that he'll get her back for that one day. After the lecture, though.

[blackcatanna]

Okita's Route Part 2: Still on Kyoto Winds because I didn't realise that I'd ramble so much

Predictably, I'm enjoying Okita's route a lot more than Kazama's. Also, I'm skipping a lot less than when I played Kazama and Iba's routes, which makes a lot of sense because Okita is actually in the Shinsengumi and, therefore, gets a lot of screen time. So far, he acts like an asshole but this isn't backed up by his actions. Apart from the casual child cruelty X_X

Chapter, uh, 3? I think...

I feel like Hijikata sticking up for Sanan is just making things worse X_X . Saying that he's not useless because he's a swordsman is just plain wrong. It makes it seem like he's just saying it out of pity. I'm sure that Sanan has plenty to contribute, besides slicing people up.

"Sanan is quite the beloved member here, isn't he? It's nice to see such a tight-knit group." -_- Itou is such a master of shade. Gently implying that they only keep Sanan around because of their relationship. You evil bitch X_X

"Ugh, who brought those bastards into the Shinsengumi?" RIGHT?! Glad to see that Okita's not blindly following Kondou's lead here.

"He is easily deceived by silver tongues, those who appear virtuous... but are real scumbags." As the great Roisin Conaty once said: "Charming is just lube for evil." However, this is kind of backing up what those asshole kids were saying earlier about Kondou being an idiot X_X

SNOOP SNOOP 👀

AH! OKITA CAUGHT ME TALKING TO MYSELF! AGAIN X_X

"Trying to run away behind our backs." -_- You know that's not true.

"Heh, I'm just messing with you." No shit. "I mean, unless you were escaping, then I'll slit your throat." -_- You just couldn't resist the opportunity to throw out another casual death threat, could you?

Is he worried about my safety? I KNOW YOU'RE TRYING TO BE FLIPPANT BUT I SEE THROUGH YOU.

"Good girl." -_-

"It sounded like something out of a fairy tale." Oooooooooh hooooooneeeey... Have you not been paying attention?!

Welp, Okita told me to scream so... AAAIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

Oh, apparently, not that... OKITAAAAA! Bet he loved that.

"Aaaaaaaaaaagh!" Everyone, please stop screaming.

Ngl, Sanan looks good with white hair.

Apparently, Okita likes hearing me screaming his name... Good to know...

"Don't worry your little head. It would be my pleasure to help you die." O_O ... Isn't that a little hasty!?!

"You're not serious, are you?" HONEY X_X

"It's really annoying, you know. You think you're part of the Shinsengumi?" </3 Ouch X_X You're the ones who took me prisoner, y'know? However, Chizuru does often act like she's the only one who cares about the Shinsengumi members, which must be annoying af.

"We only keep you alive because you're useful. You are NOT one of us." Uh... Thanks for calling me useful? But is that seriously your attitude? Anyone who's not useful to you should just die? -_-

"His words shattered my already breaking heart." Aw! </3 Poor Chizuru bae!

"Seriously... You can really be a pain, you know that?" RIGHT. BACK. AT. YOU.

"It'd be easier to just kill you," Broken record much?

"Had their last thoughts as men been hope they might survive the madness? It sounded horrible..." YUUUP.

"Sano! Make something up!" Definite DnD vibes again! When you make the low charisma character roll deception X_X

"You're a miserable actor. Keep your mouth shut." I'm sure that this exchange won't seem suspect at all X_X

"Oh, Sanan... Who cares what you are? You're alive!" Bless Kondou's pure and simple heart :')

"Yukimura, you go back to your room. I know you didn't sleep much." Why am I the only person in this game who requires sleep? -_- Just a trend I've noticed...

"*Cough* *Cough*" O_O OKITA, ARE YOU OKAY!??? O_O

"You owe us a lil' booze! Or maybe even, heh, a little... company?" WHERE'S OKITA'S MURDEROUS INSTINCT WHEN YOU NEED IT!?!?

"Suddenly I felt a hand on my arm." BWOOOOOOAAAARP!!! PHYSICAL CONTACT ALARM!!!

"Calm down, kid." ... NO. I HAVEN'T BEEN TOUCHED IN MONTHS.

"Hey hey hey! Looks like she's got the hots for you, Souji!" Oh Heisuke X_X

"No matter what, I won't buy Ishida Medical Powder." XD Got to admire Okita for staying true to his convictions :')

"I'm using the hell out of you" O_o Calm down, Hijikata X_X

Guess I'm going to have to put stalking Okita on hold for now...

Harada and Shiranui should just kiss already.

""Huh? Chizuru?" Okita looked up from cleaning his sword as I entered the hall." OH, HE WAS POLISHING HIS SWORD, EH? ;P YES, I AM TWELVE. Tbf, his face really does look like he's been caught in the act...

"Oh shut up, will you? It's all your fault. The medicine you gave me totally doesn't w..." >:( I'm hoping that the reason that sentence trails off is because I give him a verbal smack down!!

"*Cough* *Cough*" O_O WELL, I GUESS NOW I CAN'T CALL HIM A CUNT!

BLOOD O_O

"It's nothing." ... BOI!!

This game is totally a forcing-stubborn-men-to-rest simulator X_X

"I'd been given instructions to stay away" from the physical examinations but ho's gotta ho', amirite?!

"Oh my... So you WANT to see those savages? What peculiar taste..." Itou, don't call me out like this. Although, I still feel like we should respect their privacy X_X

"Oh! Oh..." ALRIGHT, YOU THIRSTY BITCH, CALM DOWN.

*Camera zooms in on Nagakura's tiddies* -_-

"Your body's fine, Shin." - Heisuke.

"Don't you wanna order a slice of this beef cake? I got two meaty servings on a plate, right here." Aaaaaagh! X_X My eeeeyyyeees.... Can't... un-read... sentence... please... fetch.... brain... bleach...

"A medical exam is for finding problems, not showing off. Now move." PREACH, SAITO!!!

"I feel like it's rude to intrude..." AND YET HERE WE ARE X_X

"It grants immortality" ??? Except for the part where you turn to ash???

"You're forcing your body in ways the eyes can't see." LISTEN TO THE DOCTOR, GUYS!!!

Everyone's just... RIPPING Takeda to shreds XD

"I'm scared shitless, believe me." :'( Poor Okita

No smart comments here... this is just really sad :'(

He's seen me? It's been nice knowing y'all...

Finally, Chizuru calls out Okita for threatening to kill her so much.

"Desist, you hooligans!" Sen is such a Queen! I want a Sen route!

Chizuru and Sen standing up to these arseholes is giving me LIFE! :') PREACH, GIRLS, PREACH!!!

"What were you going to do if they hurt you gravely?" Regenerate, biatch! >:)

"C'mon, was she that pretty?" UM, YES. But I think that she gives off too much of a domme vibe to be Okita's type :P

Chizuru is getting VERY distracted by Okita's hair. You know those scenes in movies where the woman takes down her hair and it's all slow motion and super sexy? This series has a lot of that. Plus when they get their Western makeovers :')

"That's funny... You don't LOOK like an especially nosy, hand-wringing version of my mother." XD I mean, -_- That totally wasn't hilarious.

"I grabbed his towel and began to scrub his head." ... We totally are his mother X_X

"I feel like I remember a time when you were nice and quiet..." NOT ANYMORE, BITCH! AND NOW, I'M ARMED WITH A TOWEL >:)

"You're really good with your hands." O_o ... What?

"You tied your hair up so quickly..." Why don't you show me what else you can do with them? ;)

Now he wants to know what I think of his hair? :/

OMG, HE'S TRYING TO COPY KONDOU'S HAIR XD I HAVE NO WORDS (for once)

Oh, you're surprised that I kept my promise? I'll have you know that I am an honourable woman, good sir! >:/

But Chizuru's claiming to only have done it out of fear of being sliced and diced? :/Uh, sure?

Chapter 4:

"They're small potatoes." This game has some excellent phrases in it X_X

Itou wanting to change the Shinsengumi uniform because it's not "fashionable" enough is the kind of genius that I'd expect from this game's most relatable character :') Although, I personally think that the blue uniforms are pretty <3

Awe, Chizuru thinks that Okita's joking about killing Itou :')

Kaoru just VERY BLATANTLY giving away that he was involved in the notice board incident X_X

:O I'm slightly jealous to discover that Okita's casual death threats aren't just reserved for me!

I get the sense that Okita knows that Kaoru's a boy but I'm sure that it wouldn't stop him if Kaoru was really a girl. Hooray for gender equality!

"I felt embarrassed for even doubting her for a second," O_e SERIOUSLY??!??

We're just going to let him go now!?!

Now Okita's having a coughing fit D: It was so stupid to run off and make him come after us :(

"What if she had accomplices nearby" GOOD. POINT. Chizuru would be so easy to lure into a trap X_X

"Without me around, you're just a useless kid." But I have a great personality! So, together, we almost make one complete, functioning adult :)

"Stop being so timid." I wish that I had that power :'(

"You can rely on us when you need to." Aweee! ^_^

"even compared to the weakest Shinsengumi foot soldier, I was pathetic." HEY. STOP THAT. WHAT DID I SAY? GREAT. PERSONALITY.

"Did you need something?" "Blood." O_O AH. Well, at least he doesn't beat about the bush! O_O

"What the hell? That's a little cold of you, having that pass for a good-bye, isn't it?" YEAH! :'( MIKI IS RIGHT! </3 :(

"Saburo. Watch your mouth." I'm sure that Miki is sad when Itou dies but 90% of their interactions are Itou telling Miki to shut up. X_X

"Is... Is that okay?" NO. IT IS NOT OKAY. SAITO AND HEISUKE ARE LEAVING, ALONG WITH LITTLE PIECES OF MY HEART. D'X

"would that mean I could never see them again?" *sobs*

"We're going to keep relations amicable between our two organisations." AHAHAHAHAHA HA.

"Okita...?" "... Hm? Damn." Uh, nice to see you, too?

"Next time we run into 'em, we'll probably have to kill each other." O_O Don't be so flippant, you ass :'(

"Swords don't think" damn, I didn't realise that you were sword-kin. Everyone thinks and has feelings. I'm sure that no power could convince Okita to kill Kondou.

"Takeda also left" and not one single fuck was given. :')

Just going to ignore Okita making fun of my "bed head" -_-

"I've come to take you" orly? ;)

"Look, lady, you're not part of the Shinsengumi, so I'd appreciate it if you could keep your nose out of our business." So, now that it's convenient for you, I'm part of the Shinsengumi? -_- I still haven't forgotten what you said before, asshole >:( Remember? HEART = BROKEN.

Sen knows that I'm a SLUT ^_^

"I can't tell if you have guts, or if you've got rocks for brains..." It must be the latter if I'm staying because of you XP

*Terrible decision immediately has lethal consequences*

LEMME GO! >:(

See Kazama post for my COLOURFUL feelings on this cunt >:(

Kondou can be so badass when he wants to be :')

Why... Hello there ;)

"Gotta admit, I didn't figure you for this type of girl." Then you haven't been paying attention ;P

Oh yeah: BWWWWWAAAAAAAARRRRP!!! PHYSICAL CONTACT ALARM!!! And then some X_X

"Didn't think I'd be getting pushed down into bed tonight, least of all by you." Oh yeah? Who else did you have in mind? Kondou? -_-

"Oh no! No no no!" Chizuru, we know you're thirsty and it's okay! Embrace the thot within! :')

"Tell me... How is it? On top of me. Does it feel good?" PLEASE SAY YES, PLEASE SAY YES, PLEASE SAY YES!

"I hadn't realised I was still on top of him." Uh-huh. Sure. And what a terrible shame that was.

"If I go out, Kondou will get mad at me." And then no more bum fun :( (me@me: WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!??! me: XD Sorry)

"Okita's eyes shone with admiration for Kondou." X_X The fanfiction writes itself...

Just to be clear, I think it's pretty gross to ship people with their guardians, even if they're both adults at the time, because that's called GROOMING.

"He isn't going to need the Water of Life. I'll make sure of that." ... How, Hijikata?! He's literally DYING of tuberculosis!

And now he's not eating :'(

"I just don't want to. Is that really a problem?" Yes, because you'll starve to death.

"Hm, you are a doctor's daughter... Maybe you just can't leave a sick guy alone?" Or maybe I just don't want YOU to die, ass >:'(

I WILL MAKE YOU WHATEVER YOU WANT, JUST EAT IT!!! Ooooooh! He's blushing :O

He doesn't like bitter stuff but wants me to put grated radish in his porridge? O_o Well, I'm glad that he's cooperating :D

"I'm only going to eat it if it's delicious." Well, if you don't like it, I'll try again! :D

"Don't think I've given up or something." Okay D': <3

EAT THE FOOD, OKITA >:D

"It makes me feel good..." Hooray ^_^

"Could you keep me company for a while?" :O Okey! :)

"What would I talk about?" HELLO DARKNESS MY OLD FRIEND...

"He wasn't afraid to die," um, weren't you eavesdropping on his conversation with the doctor? -_-

"I want to help... But I'm getting weaker every day." Of course you do :'( This is more heartbreaking than him saying that you're not part of the Shinsengumi and just annoying DX

Maybe tell him that everybody likes having him around and that the Shinsengumi is where he belongs? Or, we could just leave him to wallow in misery... I guess that works, too X_X

"I couldn't see someone like Okita succumbing to a mere disease." ... Why, exactly? Is he supposed to fight it off with his sword or persuade it to fuck off with the force of his personality?

"He'll be fine. Right...?" NOOOPE.

SAITO 😍 I mean, uh, whatever... Totally not bothered at all...

WAIT, HOLD ON: SPY-TO. Yes, thank you. I am a genius :3

Finally murdering Itou for realskies! :')

I get that Hijikata and everyone are trying to look out for Okita but he's terminally ill. Keeping him out of the action is only going to keep him miserable until his inevitable demise. :'(

"Saito'll be here for a few days, so you'll have someone to play with." -_- Bit patronising, Hijikata X_X

Kazama being his usual, charming self X_X

Let's go find Okita and... Tell him to go back to bed? Okay...

What the fuck!?!! Kaoru!?!!

Do we ever get a decent explanation for why Kaoru was sent to live with some abusive fucks?

Kaoru... Why are you so short? I bet you were malnourished X_X

Okita's just watching this unfold, chomping on imaginary popcorn...

"Do you just plan to use her, like Kazama does?" O_o... I fucking hope not, because that would be INCEST!!!

"... No," OH, THANK GOD.

"What would you have done if I'd said yes?" Ugh, you said no already! Can we please move this conversation in a less incestuous direction X_X

"... No. You're free to take her." OKITA!!! HE'S MY BROTHER X_X Not that I'm expecting you to leap to my defense but this conversation is WEIRD as FUCK.

:O The Ochimizu! Is Kaoru trying to help Okita?! Misguidedly, but still.

"But... if their plan is to simply use my dear sister as some sort of demonic broodmare... I can't allow that to happen." ... Kaoru... :'O That's... Actually really sweet XO This is the first time that someone who claims to be part of my family has actually looked out for me :')

Oh, so Kaoru wants to use Okita to protect me from Kazama! I have a feeling that he's going to be disappointed if he thinks that Okita will do what he tells him to but I appreciate the gesture :')

"Please don't do anything that would hurt Kondou so, Okita." Ugh, even as he lies dying, he's supposed to be worrying about upsetting other people? >:(

"Okita the Fury; Okita the beast." X_X Bit harsh but okay.

"He had traded away his soul." Um, since when? XD

"Happy now, Kaoru Naguno?" "Yes I am." ... Fair.

"... For falling into my trap." Wait, what?!? O_O

"I'm happy I got to make my sister suffer." Kaoru, why? D': WE COULD HAVE HAD IT AAAAAAAAAAAAAA-AAA-AAALLL!!! DX

I'm glad that Kaoru did away with the Nagumo fuckers >:( But still, why take it out on me?!

Even dressed as a boy, Kaoru still looks prettier than Chizuru...

*Sigh* looks like I'm being choked, as usual X_X

I feel like Kaoru could easily have given Okita something much worse than the Ochimizu if he REALLY wanted to make me suffer.

"I'd run out of things to say." X_X Again?!

"This was my decision and I don't regret it." That is good to know :)

"You shouldn't get involved with a guy like me." Oh, here we go X_X

"That came out of nowhere," Too right!

"No" uh, does that mean "no, I won't get involved with you" or "no, I won't do as you say"???

Uh, is he crying?! "Hey! You can't just act like you're sick when you want something!" XD What the actual fuck is happening right now???

"I'm dead" ... Uh... Really? Because... You seem very much alive...

"I don't think Kondou wants you around just because he wants you to do things for him." FINALLY, some sense!

Aaaand, apparently, it's earned me The Unblinking Stare of Doom >:(

"Do you mind not trying to speak for Kondou." Do you mind not assuming that he's so much of an asshole that he'd kick you out just because you're inactive during the day?! >:(

"It's not like you're capable of knowing exactly how Kondou truly feels." YES, YUKIMURA!!! GET HIM!! >:D

"Do you think Kondou would still need me... Even if I can't hold a sword anymore?" YES.

"You're right." I know :3

"I'm just jealous of you, Okita, that you have someone like Kondou by your side." Yeah. >:'( Fuck you, Kaoru, fuck you, Kodo :'(

"Oh yeah, huh... I totally forgot." Ffs, Okita XD

"They just happened to be there when you were born, you know?" Yeah! >:( And they can all go to hell!

"Somehow, my chin had acquired something of an arrogant tilt" yaaaas! You live your best life, girl! Let go of the haters, cut out the negativity! Stick it to 'em!

Chapter 5:

"How dangerous could foreign weapons be?" Oh, my sweet, Summer Sanan X_X

"Why are you going on night rounds with us?" ... Wait, what?! Why am I going on night rounds?

AS IF putting myself in danger is going to help Okita in any way X_X

DAMN, KONDOU... Nice, uh, blood you're accessorising with, there. O_O MEDIC!!!

"Lucky for us, they're idiots." Hooraaaay!

Okita's not going to be happy when he sees this...

Speak of the devil...

HIJIKATA, STOP BEATING ABOUT THE BUSH.

"I thought for a moment that Okita was going to grab Hijikata and shake him." :O :D Please yes!

Okita is suuuuuper keen to blame Hijikata for this -_-

"If he dies, it's your ass in the fire, Hijikata." Another excellent image but this pointless conversation has gone on for too long X_X

"I will find you, no matter where you may be, and I will kill you." O_O OKITA!! I THOUGHT THAT YOU SAID YOU WERE CALM!!! Bloody hell X_X

Oh no... What has Okita done now X_X

Killing spree, mad science, aggressive interrogation, Hijikata murder? The possibilities are endless with this stabby boi.

Where exactly am I running to? "I had finally found him." HOW?! With the power of love?! O_o

Looks like "Killing spree" it is X_X

"I'm about to murder you." Ffs Souji X_X

"I'm just doing my job." OH YEAH?!? THEN WHY DID YOU FEEL THE NEED TO GO BEHIND EVERYONE'S BACKS, HUH?!

"What's wrong with me doing what I'm doing?" Yeah, what's wrong with sadistically slaughtering a bunch of virtually defenceless men as they attempt to retreat?! -_-

"I just killed people, no matter who it was, as long as it was what Kondou wanted." *Sigh* Kondou's not going to be around for ever, you know? X_X Maybe TRY think about why your doing what you're doing. Maybe learn from Kondou's example?

"Do not ever act out and worry the chief like that again." XD You tell him, Saito!

"Idiots." XD Hijikata

"I didn't wake up until evening had arrived." Oh look, it's me :)

OH, FUCK. That looked like a Kaoru silhouette :O

Why do they keep saying that Kaoru "tricked" Okita into drinking the Water of Life?! Kaoru offered it and Okita drank it. No trickery here!

"They wanted to avenge Itou. You remember him? The man you deceived and murdered?" XD Can't argue with that :')

"shoot the weaker target first." UGH. Why do I always get SHOT!?!

"Call me what you want." Oh, I intend to 3:)

Omg, I didn't get shot! :O BECAUSE OKITA USED HIMSELF AS A HUMAN SHIELD O_O ... BUT WHY?!??

NO, DON'T CHECK UP ON ME! WE NEED TO MOVE BEFORE WE GET SHOT AT AGAIN!!!

Oh no! O_O Doesn't look like he'll be moving any time soon O_O

"Okita! Okitaaaaa!" O_O

"It kills me to see you hurt, just as much as it kills you to see Kondou hurt!" O: <3 :'(

"What an idiot.. " No, Kaoru! You're the idiot! Because you will never be happy while you continue down this sadistic, evil path, wasting your own life trying to destroy someone else's and refusing to let go of your spiteful jealousy >:( At least Okita's risking his life for something good.

"The more despair and anger you feel, the more you look like me." ... Silver linings! :)

D: Did they use silver bullets?! :O

Wait, when did Yamazaki get wounded?! :O

Bless Hijikata for letting me stay with my crush XD

Final Chapter:

Yamazaki is fine :D Hooray!

"They need men, so we need to go now..." Uh... Then why aren't you dressed? X_X

"... I want you to remain calm as I tell you this." That is... NOT AN ENCOURAGING WAY TO START A CONVERSATION O_O

D': Inoue has fallen. :'( It hurts every time DX

Aw, he looks really sad :'( and no wonder...

"as soon as we arrive, I'm gonna swing my sword at anyone and everyone." Uh... That's the spirit X_X

ONWARDS TO EDO

[unproduciblesmackdown]

it’s wild to me that there are such stubborn widespread concepts re: what jared’s like and what the nature of his relationship with evan is like, despite these concepts being like.......often almost directly contradicted by canon, especially since most of them stem from that “first day” exchange which is very brief so like, is it That difficult to reflect on it a moment? idk

like okay already there’s the idea that evan is always chasing after jared while jared evades him or brushes him off. literally jared’s first appearance is when he walks up to evan and initiates conversation. after that you’ve got evan presumably being the one videocalling jared, who is accepting these chats even though evidently he doesn’t even know Why evan’s calling him when he accepts.....i guess we can assume evan approached jared before sincerely me and to get him and alana in the same place during disappear, but then in act 2 right from the start we see how it’s jared who’s trying to make these overtures to hang out which evan is brushing off. i would not absorb all this info and come away from it with the idea that evan has been desperately pursuing jared and crushed by constant rejection all along

the idea that evan and jared’s interactions are just made up of jared constantly insulting evan and trying to beat him into the dust.....like yeah jared teases evan but he’s still always trying to connect with him, he’s not just showing up to emotionally wedgie him and shove him into his locker, which is a perfect segue into how william “helped develop the writing of the charcter” roland repeatedly says that jared is like a version of him who hadn’t learned to be nicer in early high school and that why he (will) was ruder to people was after being shoved in a locker and feeling the need to Reinvent himself to be un-shove-in-a-lockerable and that he teased people without much thought but didn’t even know it was coming off mean until adults in his life sat him down to talk about it..........segue back into how jared’s bluntness / honesty coming off insensitive sometimes or whatever isn’t the same as oh he’s just obviously cruel and hates evan like....c’mon

and like “jared never cared about evan” like, what. his whole entrance line about jerking off was really just about asking evan how his summer went lol......and then he does attentively listen to evan’s whole story, and doesn’t talk about himself until evan asks him........and like, people will act like it’s so mean of him to have been flippant about evan breaking his arm or whatever which like, yeah it sucks to break your arm but jared can hardly be expected to guess to Real Story there

where’s the idea that evan has just been under jared’s thumb this whole time being mercilessly pushed around by him and that if only he had the nerve to stand up to jared’s tyranny he could unfriend him..........if i’ve said it once i Will say it a thousand times more, jared is worse at standing up for himself or handling confrontation than anyone else in the show, including evan. there’s never any signs that evan is particularly intimidated by jared.......we see jared letting evan have his way up until jared tries to put his foot down during gfy way into act 2 and it doesn’t even work and jared just has to bail again b/c he’s too upset and canon doesn’t tell us they ever interacted in the next year and a half haha cool.....anyways and sincerely me is ENTIRELY about evan and jared and their relationship and what do you know it’s the most fun song that’s willing to not be completely solemn and evan and jared are both enjoying themselves by the end once they’ve developed their email rapport and it’s Just evan and jared and evan is clearly more comfortable than we ever otherwise see him and is just speaking his mind and giving jared a lil smack and asserting what he wants and jared is just rolling with it like. yeah no jared’s just got evan in a figurative headlock the whole time sure

the idea that jared and connor would always be at each other throat’s like uhhh??? we see them have One interaction, in which jared fires off with the same level of Teasing Observation he just threw at evan so like, for all we know that was jared’s version of a friendly overture. and when connor pointedly doesn’t React, we have jared neutrally explaining It Was A Joke? and all connor has to do is solidify his negative reaction and jared’s bailing b/c he wasn’t actually picking a fight and nothing about this suggests that he was trying / expecting to get a negative reaction from connor. i always take the way jared’s talking about Connor Is Off The Shits Remember When He Threw A Printer is that jared was probably especially wary of connor. and we see jared Never really assert himself / stand up for himself so why would he just be jumping at the chance to piss off this guy he’s probably especially intimidated by

the idea that jared is always rejecting evan’s Friendship when all we know of the matter is that, after jared’s the one to approach evan to talk, evan is all “we’re friends” and jared’s all “*family friends” as if that’s saying they’re Not friends at all.......and then later on we learn that evan apparently spent all of junior year saying that he had no friends, a year in which jared presumably existed, and then evan says “you don’t have any other friends” to jared which is meaner than anything jared does to him in the show and also implies that yes he does think that jared considers him a friend so like

the “jared always avoids evan b/c evan’s uncool and jared doesn’t wanna seem uncool by association” like uhhh again, jared approaches evan in the hallway, so that’s kind of the antithesis to “jared sprints away as evan walks towards him in the hope of a nice chat”............and frankly there’s like not much chance that jared even has to worry about who sees him as Popular or not like......he has no friends

or the idea that jared doesn’t take anything seriously just b/c he delivers things humorously like.......a lot of the time the Comic Relief that jared provides isn’t because what he said was even necessarily a joke, it’s just inherently Funny to swing from a completely seriously-toned dramatic scene right to jared’s reaction, or he Does deliver something lightly / casually but it’s not necessarily just like haha a punchline jared’s not actually thinking about any of this stuff......you even get the moment that evan says jared thinks “this is all a big joke, but it’s not, it’s important,” and jared gets more annoyed at suggesting that none of the stuff he’s been feeling/thinking has been Serious and so just slightly comes for evan’s life

yeah idk just these so-common Notions about jared are like, based on nothing, if not directly contradicted by canon and like. lord

[griffinsandpeacocks]

Loony Two Writing Challenge Bonus! I Feel Like Time’s Standing Still

Griffin sighs as he sees yet again, everything seems to have frozen. He get’s up from the cafe he’s at walks up to the counter and leaves a note over the cost of his order. He walks down the road and sighs looking around. At first he had thought he was the one doing this unintentionally. After several times he realized it wasn’t him but he seemed to be the only one unaffected by this. Eventually he manages to get to the bus and slides into the back and hides behind a book. He waits and hops off at a stop near the University and sighs. He’s always been an odd one out. The kids from other rich families disliked him because he not only payed to get it he tested and was begged to come. The kids that tested like him refused to believe he had tested as high and had paid his way in. So he was... Not too popular. He hums and goes to the dorm and steps in he had been clear, he didn’t have much he just asked they leave his bed desk and wardrobe alone. Which took up one wall. Thankfully they have so far.

He sits at his desk and starts working on his thesis. He keeps it on his laptop which he carries on him everywhere, though he also keeps it backed up in his email. He might be slightly paranoid. He’s been working on theoretical bio reading tech that can scan, register, and possibly even duplicate bio-signatures. In all reality he’d found though species tend to share a large portion of a bio-signature, there are specific quarks that make each unique. Like fingerprints but as of yet he hasn’t found a way to scrub and change bio-signatures. He’d made a prototype but all it does is register and record a single bio-signature. He’d created a locking mechanism that required to scan the little bracelet he’d made the bio-scanner into. He’d had to tweak it and had been tinkering when his roommate came back Griffin wasn’t fully comfortable with working on his tech but he was close to getting the lock to work he takes off his goggles and his gloves and rubs his eyes waving attempting to be nice. They nod and look at his lock and the bracelet. 

“What is that..?” Alec asks, his room mate was thankfully laid back and had slowly realized since a lot of their classes were together though rich Griffin wasn’t faking how smart he actually was. Then again no one cared to look up his last name and realize who his parents were. One was a leader in archaeology the other was a leader in sociology. One dug up ancient civilizations the other went through and worked out how that civilization functioned. The two of them often worked together and Griffin had grown up fascinated by the way ancient people interacted and what they could build even with primitive technology let alone limited resources.

“Um... Basically it’s a lock and scanner combination. It’s meant to scan a bio-signature and the lock and bracelet are meant to sync so only that specific bio-signature can open it. I’m trying to work out a few bugs that are making it kind of useless.” Griffin explains and Alec nods he was working in coding, in fact he was hoping to become a government sanctioned hacker. Griffin always found it odd that the government frowned on hacking but would gather up ‘White caps’ to help them. 

“Sounds complex.” Griffin shrugs and sighs rubbing at his eyes again.

“That’s half the problem. Besides nothing worth doing is ever easy. Or at least that’s what father likes to say. I wonder how their latest dig’s going...” Griffin mused and he sighs and packs up his project he’ll just go ask the engineering professor if he can see a way to stop the damn scanner from locking in the signature.

“Yeah, that sounds seriously complex and my brain isn’t weird like yours.” Alec jokes Griffin snorts as he stands stretching.

“Yeah might be a blessing, if you were more like me you’d be hopeless with those ones and zeros you love so much.” Griffin jokes and Alec laughs as Griffin walks away to go ask his professor some questions. He spend the next few days noticing the random freezes start to happen more frequently. It’s starting to annoy him as he can’t just go about his day if this keeps up. Especially if his classes keep getting interrupted. As he’s walking back to the dorm he sees time pause again and growls looking around as it’s the second time that day. He sees an albino skipping around moving people and cackling and Griffin freezes waiting for them to get closer. When they do Griffin sighs.

“This shit’s getting old quickly do you mind? I have classes I’d love to do without getting paused in the middle of drinking water. I don’t have time to pretend I don’t see odd shit happening!” Griffin shouts making the man jump and cough. He moves slowly back and then books it away Griffin keeps a firm hand on his bag to keep it from jostling too much and books it after him growling hating when time stops being frozen and he’s now dancing through a crowd to get after the stranger. He catches up in an alley. 

“Seriously asshole, explain! I thought I was doing it though I know I don’t have any crazy magic or any kind of mutation.” The man groans.

“Look I do this because it’s fun and I know how to not that I know how it works but eh, obviously however I can do this you have something similar that makes you immune to my effects.” He says and Griffin sighs.

“Can you just go screw with people away from Uni? I’d like to not look anymore out of place than I do.” Griffin whines. The man paused and raised a brow.

“Out of place you’d know how that feels?” He asks incredulous and Griffin glares. 

“Look asshat I might not be albino or have some odd social quirk but you try to be a rich background walking into a Uni with high IQ stats and see how long it takes for no one to like you. The people that tested in for merit hate me because I got in and they only see money, the rich hate me because half my way in was merit alone. I don’t need scholarships I didn’t ask for any I just paid like I could do and showed I have the smarts so everyone seems to hate me with a passion so fuck you yes I’m an outcast.” Griffin rants and the man leans back and nods.

“Alright I get your issue. I’ll leave the Uni area alone.” He says and Griffin sighs.

“Thank you. I’m just getting fed up with everyone hating me and I don’t want this on you of it. Though... Have any theories on why we can do the thing with stopping time?”  Griffin asks and the other shrugs.

“The most I can say is I know when I freeze an area it basically enters it’s own little bubble the moment I let go of the affect everything resumes back at the time I paused it. Like the area I pause basically loops back to the start point. That’s all I’ve really been able to see.” He says and Griffin nods having noticed it too.

“Well then... You go have fun I guess.” Griffin says walking away confused about the man’s flippant carefree personality. 

“We should get drinks some time, you’re interesting.” He calls and Griffin looks back.

“Sure, so long as it’s not in a time loop.” Griffin jokes walking away hearing the other laughing. He’s grinning as he walks away.

[murasaki-murasame]

Thoughts on Sarazanmai Episode 11 [Finale]: “I Want To Connect, So Sarazanmai”

Do you ever just watch an anime episode that’s So Much in so many different ways that it makes you immediately want to lay down and sleep for a hundred years, but in like a good and hopeful way?

Yeah.

It’s very fitting that the final episode title is technically self-referential nonsense that in practice makes complete emotional sense and leaves everything feeling neatly tied together. It just Works [tm].

Thoughts under the cut.

Even though they were in like 5% of this episode I just wanna immediately point out that Reo and Mabu are ALIVE and IN LOVE and my SKIN IS CLEARED. It didn’t exactly happen in the way I expected, but I was hoping that they’d get revived, and here we are. The finale gave absolutely no shits about actually explaining any of the lingering mysteries about them, but I can’t fault them for it when they gave them such an unambiguously happy ending together. And in practice it perfectly fit the dreamy, surreal, intensely emotionally-driven vibe of the whole finale. Seeing their connected rings morph into them flying through the air while holding hands and the sheer power of their gay love literally paving the way for the main trio to finally connect was one of those moments where you just gotta sit back and accept that Ikuhara’s throwing at you, lmao.

Realistically I thought they might get left off on a pretty bittersweet note like a lot of Ikuhara characters, but nah, they’re just straight up back to being alive and happy and they pretty much got to attend their daughter’s magical furry wedding, lmao. They didn’t even get their memories erased like I thought might happen, so the whole confession scene from ep10 is still perfectly intact and now that the whole otter thing’s dealt with, we can probably safely assume that the two of them made up and are back to being The Ultimate Couple. It also looks like the two of them and even Sara and Keppi are still hanging out in the human world, which is kinda unexpected. I thought that even in the best case scenario they’d all just head back to the kappa kingdom, but I guess since that doesn’t really exist anymore they’re just gonna stay in the human world. Reo and Mabu seem to be working as rickshaw drivers now, which makes it even more clear that they’re probably back to being more or less regular people and being part of regular human society, and they’ve probably given up their jobs as cops, which is nice.

None of this answers the still lingering question of ‘how the fuck does the manga even fit into the timeline aaaaaaa’, but I don’t care as much about finding out the answer to that after this finale, so it’s not a big deal. I guess we’re meant to think that it happened before the anime, though. My best guess is that Sara was intentionally sent into the human world as a baby to protect her from the kappa/otter war, or something, and then Reo and Mabu raised her, she magically turned into her teenage/adult self [in an instantaneous fairy tale-y kind of way], then she went back to the kappa kingdom for a bit, and I guess she arranged things with Keppi and had them get recruited into the kappa kingdom? I still think they’re humans that got roped into this like the main trio, so I think that makes sense to me.

Even more so than with the main trio, I think that those two getting a 100% happily ever after with no caveats or drawbacks really spells out how fundamentally optimistic and hopeful this series is, and how they were one way or another victims of a harsh system that didn’t deserve the shit they went through, and so they got given a happy ending. It’d be understandable if people feel upset that they got such a happy ending after having done undeniably awful things, but I don’t mind.

And on the topic of the main trio, hoo boy they sure were the main focus of this episode, lol. And by ‘them’ I mean ‘Toi’ because let’s be honest he was basically the actual main character of the show by the end, and the finale was like 99% focused on his character development specifically. Which isn’t a bad thing. Kazuki’s whole deal had already been more or less resolved by the end of ep6, so it makes sense that the second half in general focused more on Toi.

On the flip side, Enta kinda got the short end of the stick in terms of screen-time and development, and things end in a sorta wishy-washy way in regards to his feelings for Kazuki. It makes enough sense that his whole ending was about choosing not to drown himself in fruitless delusions, even if it feels kinda lame and disappointing compared to the more climactic and intense resolutions that Kazuki and Toi got.

Though tbh a big part of why I don’t feel too negatively about how Enta’s crush on Kazuki kinda fizzled into irrelevancy is because Reo and Mabu got their happy ending that preserved all of their character development, with the obvious implication that they’re back to being in a happy and stable romantic relationship. The fact that there’s at least one happy gay couple at the end of all this makes me much more willing to forgive Enta’s story being handled a bit differently. I mean, that’s part of the whole reason why diversity in storytelling is so important. When you include multiple different gay characters/relationships in your stories, you have the freedom to do different things with them, instead of having all the narrative burdens and expectations being placed on just one character/relationship. It’s annoying when the ONLY gay character in a show ends up having to repress and move on from their feelings, but it’s fine when there are other gay characters who get to have their own happy relationships.

Anyway, I really liked how Toi’s story wrapped up here. A lot of what actually happened in the finale was full on bizarre dream logic nonsense, but the emotional undercurrent of Toi being faced with the prospect of effectively committing suicide in order to free himself from the pain of human connection once and for all, and him coming to the realization on his own terms that he doesn’t want to let go of those connections, got through perfectly clearly. They actually went a lot further with his story than I expected. Literally further, in that we had a whole timeskip epilogue detailing how after the main story ended he went to juvie for a few years and then reunited with Kazuki and Enta when he returned. I’m going to assume that he turned himself in, since there shouldn’t have been any concrete evidence tying him to any of his crimes, except for maybe him shooting Reo [though even then, Reo’s corpse immediately transformed into one of those rings so I don’t think that counts as lasting forensic evidence, lmao]. It was definitely the most brushed-over part of the finale, but it didn’t need to be focused on that much, since the more important part was him reuniting with the other two afterward.

And in terms of timeskips and whatnot, I really loved the whole potential future flashforward sequence showing a what-if scenario of the three of them becoming professional soccer players and being slowly torn apart by interpersonal drama, while the different episode title cards are re-used in this new context to show how their emotional issues and hang-ups might lead to that sort of negative outcome. It did a really nice job of illustrating how they’re willing to face the possibility of future pain in order to hold onto their connections with each other. Which is what the entire show had been building up to, really. It was all about them becoming able to face the harsh realities of being known in order to lead fulfilling lives with meaningful personal relationships.

I do kinda wish their older selves looked a bit more distinct from their base designs, though. Aside from the difference in outfits you can barely tell that they’ve grown up, lol.

I was initially planning on rewatching episode 1 after this, but honestly after what actually happened I don’t really think I’d actually get anything new out of episode 1 now. The very first scene of the show is still a bit of a mystery, even though it’s obviously based around a lot of visual imagery and cinematography from the finale, and the whole deal with the ‘A’ signs is still up for interpretation. But I don’t really think it’s super important one way or another.

I’m actually very happy that the ending didn’t involve any sort of time travel, and that that’s not what the first scene of the show was hinting at. Especially with how this finale really hammered in the importance of living with the consequences of your actions and accepting the future for what it is, it would have felt very cheap if anything got reset in the end.

I guess it’s also worth noting that, at least with the main trio, there weren’t any romantic developments, which I think was fine. With how the story had been building up to this point I think it was fairly obvious that their ending was gonna be more about friendship alone. Which might disappoint some people [and the whole topic of Enta’s unrequited crush on Kazuki is it’s own whole thing], but at the very least, Reo and Mabu got their happy romantic ending together, so I don’t feel like I’m missing out, lol.

Part of me wants to be disappointed that we didn’t really learn anything new about Sara, and that she didn’t exactly, uh, DO anything even in this final episode, but honestly I feel like that’s kinda ‘the joke’. Like, she and Keppi come across as a super tongue in cheek joke about the fairy tale concept of princes and princesses. Sorta like how the Utena movie made the ‘prince’ into a complete joke, Sara and Keppi are just there to be funny plot devices, and their big ending is that they have a big fat furry wedding and that’s that. And honestly that’s fine by me. I feel like Ikuhara’s whole artistic career has involved him becoming more and more flippant and dismissive about the concepts of princes and princesses and how much importance is placed on them in fiction, and that’s valid. It reminds me a bit of how all of the actual major characters are all queer dudes and their relationships with each other are the actually important part of the narrative, whereas straight characters like Sara and Keppi and all the different faceless kappa zombie dudes are mostly just joke characters. There’s something both deeply amusing and deeply vindicating about how this show turns the tables like that, with how it frames different types of love and relationships.

The main trio’s story ended up being not super tied into what the show has to say about sexuality in general [and overall the show is less specifically ‘about’ that than Yuri Kuma Arashi was, from what I understand], but there was definitely a whole lot of social commentary about homophobia going on with Reo and Mabu, and thankfully that part of the narrative came to a satisfying and genuinely subversive ending, with them overcoming the death imposed upon them and regaining their happy lives together. 

Now I’m hoping that Ikuhara will ‘complete the set’, so to say, and have his next anime be about trans/non-binary characters, especially after how Kazuki’s whole cross-dressing thing ended up being kinda unimportant and not about gender identity to begin with. Which is still kinda disappointing to me, but oh well.

Overall, this ending was almost aggressively happy and optimistic compared to what I was bracing myself for, so thankfully it’s left me feeling warm and fuzzy and content. All in all, it was a surprisingly straightforward story in terms of it’s central messages, in spite of it’s over the top and abstract framing, and I think it really benefited from that inherent simplicity, especially in this finale, which was so singularly focused on it’s central trio [and mostly just Toi’s perspective alone]. I was a bit worried the finale might turn into one of those things where a deeply personal conflict gets blown up and tied into literally world-ending stakes, but thankfully they didn’t go unnecessarily far with it. Even the kappa/otter war resolution barely involved the main trio themselves.

At least in hindsight, I think the anime was very tightly woven and was paced surprisingly well for it’s short episode count, and it’s hard to imagine how they could have spent much more time on the main trio, but now that we have a better idea of the timeline of the series, I really think that episode 6 should have been followed up by an episode that basically adapted the ReoMabu manga, plus parts of the twitter account, and the short chapter from the first light novel volume about how they met. That way it would have ended up with a nice round 12-episode length, and I don’t think it would have ‘spoiled the surprise’ of the later reveals and developments with Reo and Mabu. I just think it would have been really good to actually cover that in the anime itself, especially since even in the finale, the whole fact that they literally raised Sara as a baby never got addressed, so it feels like anime-only viewers are missing out on a big chunk of their story. But it’s not a huge deal.

I guess at the end of the day my feelings about the finale boil down to ‘Reo and Mabu are alive and happy and that’s literally all that matters to me’, lol.

I was really worried about how I’d be left feeling after this, but I’m happy that I’ve been following this series ever since it was first announced. This is the only time I’ve watched an Ikuhara show as it’s come out, and oh boy has it been an emotional roller-coaster. The fact that it ended in a satisfying way makes it all feel worth it, though.

I probably won’t get to it immediately since I think my brain needs time to recover from this one, but sometime soon I want to finally get around to watching Penguindrum and then Yuri Kuma Arashi. I don’t think I’ll liveblog them like I’ve been doing with Sarazanmai, though, if only since I’ve already been spoiled on bits and pieces of what happens in them, but we’ll see how it goes.

[pseudowoodo]

when i get you you'll know

fandom: glee pairing: blaine/sebastian words: 1737 summary: Blaine finds Sebastian after the Gap Attack. A season 2 au set during 2x12. Seblaintine’s Day 2018

AO3 link

Blaine finds Sebastian sitting in one of the Dalton common rooms, frowning over a textbook. He’s alone, thank god, but Blaine still hovers at the doorway, watching him absentmindedly tapping his pen against the edge of the table. He has a sudden, visceral flashback to hovering behind a clothes rack at the Gap just a few hours earlier and cringes.

Taking a deep breath, he squares his shoulders and enters the room. This is already the most embarrassing day of his life, might as well keep the humiliation train rolling.

Sebastian doesn’t look up until he’s standing right over him and when he does it’s with the bored ‘Can I help you?’ look Blaine has only ever seen him use on other people. His heart sinks.

“Brought you some coffee,” he says, trying and failing to reach his usual level of cheer.

“Already got some,” Sebastian says, picking up the cup he has with him on the table and giving it an obnoxious little shake.

“It’s more of a peace offering.”

Sebastian raises his eyebrows and in a rush Blaine says, “I shouldn’t have gotten angry with you in the Warbler meeting. You were right.”

“Serenading someone at their place of work didn’t end well? I’m shocked.”

“Yes, you told me so. I’m sorry.” He works a plaintive note into his voice and gives Sebastian the best puppy eyes he can muster. It’s been a long day and he’s not above fighting dirty.

Sebastian sighs and takes proffered cup, gesturing for Blaine to sit. He takes a tentative sip and seems to find it satisfactory. He should; Blaine knows his coffee order. According to Kurt that’s significant, but Blaine’s not so sure.

He takes a sip of his own coffee, letting his victory go unremarked. He’s rewarded when Sebastian, with a shrug that’s a touch too deliberate, says, “I probably could have been less obnoxious about it.”

“Wow, that’s the closest I’ve ever heard you come to apologizing,” Blaine says with a grin that’s probably wider than the situation warrants.

“Don’t be so dramatic. I just think you’ve been punished enough.”

Blaine grimaces. “I take it you’ve heard all about it.” It’s funny to think he was so mad at Sebastian for refusing to take part in the Gap attack this morning when now the fact he wasn’t there to witness the tragedy first hand is the day’s one saving grace.

“In detail. This is going down in Warbler legend my friend.”

“And here I thought I’d be helping the Warbler’s track record for informal public performances. Which do you think will be remembered as worse, this or the literal plane crash?”

“Well, those Warblers got to die with dignity so...”

Blaine refuses to laugh. Sebastian already looks much too pleased with himself.

“Hey, at least you sounded good.”

“How would you know?” Blaine grumbles.

“You always sound good.”

Blaine smiles down into his coffee cup. “Yeah, I’m sure that’s what people will remember.” He sighs, slumping down in his chair. “I can’t believe I thought he liked me.”

“You’re better off. Trust me, he’s not worth it.”

It’s not an inherently suspicious statement; Kurt said much the same thing and Blaine had thought nothing of it. But Sebastian doesn’t do platitudes and he’s turned his attention rather pointedly back to his textbook. “Oh my god,” he says, straightening back up with a start. “You - he said he didn’t do high school!”

“Mmh, yeah, he did seem kinda freaked when he found out how old I was.”

“You could have warned me.”

“I very much did,” Sebastian points out.

Blaine groans and buries his head in his arms. “This day is the worst.”

“Relax. Odds are good you’ll never see that guy again. I haven’t.”

“It’s not even just that.” Blaine lifts his head off the table so he can deliver the news properly. “Kurt told me he thought he was the one I wanted to ask out.”

“Yikes. That’s embarrassing even for Hummel.”

“For him?” Blaine asks, furrowing his brow. “No, for me. I was completely blindsided.”

“You didn’t know Hummel was into you?” Sebastian looks genuinely surprised, a rarity for him.

“It was really that obvious?”

“Blaine, he literally transferred schools for you.”

“He did not,” Blaine says, exasperated. “He didn’t feel safe at his old school.”

Sebastian rolls his eyes. “Right, well whatever his reasons he’s been following you around like a horny puppy ever since he got here. Even Trent’s managed to maintain more dignity than that.”

Blaine’s all set to deliver the latest admonishment in his months long campaign to get Sebastian to be nicer to Kurt, but that throws him off. “Wait, what’s Trent got to do with this?”

“Nothing, just that he’s also pathetically in love with you.”

Blaine frowns. “No he’s not.”

Sebastian gives him a quizzical look, like he really wasn’t expecting pushback on this. “You’re joking right?”

“No?”

It’s almost funny watching Sebastian’s amused smile fade into disbelief. He leans forward, as if this conversation is only just now demanding his full attention. “Okay, but you know Adam from Trig has a crush on you, right?”

“Does he?” Blaine can’t help but get a little worried. He’s never seen Sebastian look so concerned before.

“What about that one you were lab partners with, Jeremy?”

Blaine shakes his head and keeps shaking it as Sebastian keeps listing names, watching his eyebrows rise steadily higher in disbelief at each one.

“The barista who keeps giving you free cookies? That blonde kid who’s always front row at our performances? Thad?”

“Thad’s straight,” Blaine says weakly.

“Oh my god.”

Evidently that was the last straw for Sebastian, who falls back against his chair. Blaine’s still half convinced he’s just teasing him, even though he knows what Sebastian’s teasing looks like and this isn’t it. It’s ridiculous, the thought of all those people liking him. But then, he’d completely failed to notice Kurt; who’s to say he hadn’t failed with others?

Still, “You definitely made a few of those up.”

“Blaine, you’re a pretty popular topic of conversation at this school; trust that I know what I’m talking about.”

“But, why?” It comes out as a bit of a whine. It’s hard to be flattered by all these supposed crushes when none of the guys he actually likes seem to care.

“Because you’re nice to them,” Sebastian says as though the concept is something he’s familiar with but doesn’t quite understand.

“Lots of people are nice!”

“Well, the whole bashful school boy thing doesn’t hurt either,” Sebastian teases and Blaine scoffs, ducking his head to hide his grin. This was more familiar territory. “You’re the teen dream heartthrob,” Sebastian continues, getting into it, “Then wind beneath our collective wings. Not to mention your truly terrific ass.” There’s a deliberate pause before he grins and says, “That was me hitting on you by the way. In case it was too subtle.”

Blaine rolls his eyes. “Okay, I’m not that oblivious. I know you like me.”

“And I know you like me,” he responds with an easiness that makes Blaine’s stomach twist. “So what’s the hold up here?”

It would be nice, Blaine thinks wistfully, if he actually meant it. “Who says I like you?”

“Don’t you? What does floppy haired Jeremiah have that I don’t?”

It’s standard Sebastian dismissiveness, but there’s something in his tone that gives Blaine pause, like he’s caught sight of a real person standing in a row of mannequins. His eyes widen. “Wait, were you jealous?”

Sebastian scoffs. “Yes Blaine, I’ve always wanted to be serenaded in a mall in Lima, Ohio.”

“That’s why you were such an asshole in the Warbler meeting!” Blaine says, ignoring his sarcasm.

“I’m always an asshole in the Warbler meetings.”

“Yeah, but not to me.” He can’t help the smile growing wide across his face. Sebastian looks so grumpy and Blaine is suddenly so sure. “You like me.”

“You literally just said you already knew that!”

“I knew you wanted to hook up with me, but that’s different. You hook up with lots of people. You don’t date.”

“I’d date you,” Sebastian says. He sounds so annoyed that Blaine bursts out laughing.

“You would?”

“Blaine, I’ve been hitting on you practically nonstop from the moment I got here. This should not be a surprise.”

“I didn’t think you were serious! I mean you’re so out of my league.”

It’s actually sweet how affronted Sebastian looks. “You actually know what you’re doing,” Blaine elaborates. “I just pretend to.”

It’s easier to admit to Sebastian than it was to Kurt. Kurt bought into the image of perfection he’d striven to create at Dalton, made it feel real, whereas Sebastian always seemed to think it was funny more than anything. Still, it’s hard enough that Blaine can’t quite manage to meet his eye.

He hears Sebastian push his chair back and tracks him as he gets up and walks around the table until he’s standing over Blaine. He rests his hand on the back of his chair and leans down until their faces are just inches apart and Blaine can’t help but look at him.

“Blaine,” he says, his gaze steady. “I like you and I want you to be my boyfriend. Clear?”

“That’s all you ever had to say.” He trying for flippant but his throat’s gone dry. Sebastian is so close.

His eyes flick down to Sebastian’s lips and just like that his mouth is on his. He tastes like coffee and courvoisier and Blaine automatically digs his fingers in the lapels of his blazer, holding him close as Sebastian deepens the kiss. He’s imagined this hundreds of times since Sebastian transferred at the start of the school year, how could he not with Sebastian constantly dangling the possibility in front of him, but now it’s real and so much better than he thought it’d be.

The break apart when Blaine grin becomes too wide for them to continue. Sebastian is smiling too, a real smile, the kind he only gets when he’s singing.

“Finally,” he says.

Blaine laughs. “I can’t believe you asked me out on Valentine’s Day.”

Sebastian wrinkles his nose. “Ugh. Neither can I.”

“No takes backs,” Blaine says, running his fingers down Sebastian’s lapels. “You know it’s my favorite holiday.”

“Really? Still?”

“Yeah,” Blaine says, running his fingers down Sebastian’s lapels. “All things considered I’ve had a pretty great day.”

[gawaine]

by popular demand: welcome to the saga of Fuckboy Supreme

*sigh* aka i’m dumb, what’s new

i’m going to try and keep this short bc ffs

Fuckboy Supreme (FS for short). Mr Popular of my cohort. hangs out at the back w/ the rest of the rugby boys. blonde, blue eyed... not my type.

i’d identified him as the FS of the year early on and Blonde Pop and I established that he, and my other friend Steffan, were probably the two best looking single guys in our course (not saying much). I heard that he was from money and was clearly trying to hide it (E much?) and I saw a lot of similarities. he was interesting to watch every now and then but I didn’t think we’d ever really cross paths.

except one day, we end up thrown together in clin. skills, alongside his best friend + housemate (Human Shield, for future reference. he becomes important later) and we kind of chat and lo and behold, he’s actually a pretty chill guy? nice enough to talk to. to the point where I tell my friends this (we all sit together down at the front) and I shock both FS and HS when I see them around and say hi (after HS and I spend a hospital shift together on NICU). more importantly, in that clin. skills session, me and HS are meant to “watch [FS] closely” to give feedback and I notice that this dude’s legs are absolutely insane, sculpted out of effing marble, and that same day, he’s happy to whip off his shirt (we’re doing resp. exams) and keep it off as he talks to someone. and I see he has a scar on his shoulder and ofc bc ME I’m like “omg sO PRETTY AND CLEAN” and he lets me basically play around with his weird af shoulder (old injury, post-surgery) as he chats to one of our tutors and I’m chatting to another tutor about the scarring. and he smells clean and he’s not super sculpted, as one would expect, but he’s lean in a natural, soft kinda way and i’m like okay, cool. and we chat a little and he’s nice about me not having a science background and w/e.

weeks go by, we say hi every now and then. then I slowly become obsessed with his legs.

it’s a slow process but the boy keeps walking into lectures, right by my seat to get to his, and he wears shorts and seriously... l e g s. but I’m wary of this so I’m happy to objectify him and for a time it works; idgaf if he notices (he doesn’t) and my friends find it hilarious, but I tell them I’m not interested in anything above the neck (or really, anything that isn’t thighs down) bc happy to stare and not know a thing about his personality thank you very much.

... I go out of my way to stand by that. and then, in a particularly shitty lecture one day, as I’m contemplating trying a psych shift, I realise the only person I know of who’s done what I’m interested in is... FS.

I decide fuck it, I’ll just message and ask - no being polite or friendly, straight to the point bc it’s work and I’m not there to open a door (even though, and I tell the girls this, by opening up messaging I feel like I am). this causes a non-stop 45min FB chat - I mean non-stop - and he’s hilarious. super hilarious. he’s also flirting w/ me and whilst I know this is all bc he’s FS (and I tell him so - he finds it v. funny), it’s a fun convo and it’s harmless and I reckon he’s just playing up bc we’re both bored.

... things escalate quickly.

we message back and forth a lot - he’s very quick and sharp, so he keeps up w/ me easily, but I’m treating him as I would anyone else. this lasts a while, but he keeps flirting and I keep telling him he’s a moron and eventually say if he keeps it up I’m just going to treat him like a psych experiment.

... I assume him continuing means he knows i’m being serious.

he becomes my psych experiment. lots of things being studied, including E and stuff from my dissertation etc etc and although at this point I know we’re embroiled in a weird power struggle, I stop giving a fucks because hey, he’s an experiment to me and i’m an unofficial therapist for him, right? win win. i don’t NEED to give a fuck about how it comes across.

2 weeks later, i’m sitting in the library while he’s at home, and we end up arguing over FB. he starts off polite but it quickly becomes i’m being intrusive, messaging him a lot, etc; why can’t I treat him like Aussie Essex (Blonde Pop’s housemate and my friend, as well as FS’) aka a normal friend and I’m like “lol but we’re not friends”, which we’ve both acknowledged before, but my stance is: I know things about him bc I asked specific things bc psychoanalysis. He doesn’t know anything about me. Friendship is mutual, that isn’t. basically I’m like “look, i’m sorry, have a nice life” in nicer words (bc I’m lost bc in my mind - I TOLD him he was a psych experiment??) and he’s all “what so you’re going to ignore me forever now haha” in not so many words and I’m like ???, but when he doesn’t respond, i’m like cool, we’re dead to each other, fine.

the girls notice how fucking ICE COLD we are w/ each other when we’re in the common room, though we wouldn’t normally talk, and Trout (not indicative of her face; a girl we both know, a member of the School - aka the group of girls who worship FS and his friends in my year, they have literally sat at FS’ feet before - who at this point, has been watching me and FS for a while) gets smug. bear in mind, after that first FB chat, I was throwing an event as co-president of the trauma society and was making the rounds around the common room to see who was coming and, after some initial back and forth, I commanded FS to come and he was like “fuck OKAY. okay? shit yes, okay” (he didn’t come and was meant to help me get numbers, but he fucked that too. idk if it was deliberate. it was a success anyway tho so w/e) and Trout was all ?!?!?! because she watches FS like a hawk and so he and I talking clearly confused her

but then a few days later he sees me sitting alone in lectures where I don’t usually sit and he’s like “morning Hannah” and, too shocked to do anything else, I auto-reply “morning [FS]” and just like that we’re okay again?

after the fight, I message him once - a silly message in a lecture by a 1st world Barbie - to test his reaction to the lecture more than anything else, but he doesn’t reply, which I suspected, but after that... no FB. I refuse to break that rule.

BUT I do grab him a couple of times when he walks by my seat in the break; I apologise face-to-face after he says hi and he apologises for the misunderstanding regarding the argument (he may have said hi after that?? idk) and he basically demands we’re friends and I’m like yeah whatever sure pal

but then he walks in one day wearing a beanie just like E’s and I. i just. it becomes a thing. i have a really cute bobble hat I wear every day bc our lecture theatre is colder than the Arctic fucking circle and so as I joke about him competing, I’m really freaking out bc that’s when I realise just how MUCH he reminds me of E. this hat becomes a Thing. I grab it one time and threaten to keep it hostage with Blonde Pop in front of all of his friends and they look at me like I’m insane, confused, lost at how I, a Front Row Person, dares to challenge FS. I’m literally in high school again.

aware of that, I die it down... and long story short, somehow, FS starts saying hi more and more in the morning and we have these mini chats (once the hat thing dies down), but it’s really tiny.

then I fuck up my wrist.

it pisses me off bc he’s clearly curious but doesn’t ask and I’m like “further proof we’re not friends” to myself but by this point, so much little shit has happened that all of my friends know what’s going on (lbr they did anyway) and his School are aware of me too - but OH - so there was this med school ball thing and we both went and that’s when I got more E vibes and I was like “fuck this” bc the more I avoided it the more it was happening and he was avoiding me and so AFTER that I was like “fuck this” and planned on ignoring him but that just... didn’t happen (I’m omitting so much of the finer details).

so yeah, he’s annoying me about my wrist bc he’s eavesdropping when I talk to my friend about it, but... nothing? so I’m like w/e fuck this dude and by this point, as an accidental by product of me being pissed with him at the ball (and myself), I’m dealing with some other male Situations and it’s pissing me off 

bUT then exam week arrives and we have a really lovely chat before anatomy and he’s being all sweet and friendly and the School is confused and HS is confused (HS is perpetually confused when it comes to me and FS, which is odd, bc otherwise we’re pretty chill w/ each other) but at this point something doesn’t feel right bc I’m good w/ body language, right? communication, esp non-verbal, is my thing. and he’s being weird.

then I come home for the weekend to get my wrist seen to and Blonde Pop goes out with everyone else to celebrate exams being over (I leave with 2 of my other friends right after) and FS sees Blonde Pop, who he’s spoken to bc of me enough times now, and he asks where I am - and that’s weird bc we NEVER have spoken in a social setting so I’m like??

we get back; he stops before lectures and comments on my temporary cast (fracture clinic appointment tomorrow guys, prayer circle) and says something like “oh, well it’s good it’s completely immobilised” (30mins later i realise why this bothered me; he’s quoted me directly from when he was eavesdropping on me and my friend discussing the injury accidentally, and I’m like aHA I KNEW IT) and I make a flippant comment about yeah, but it’s not great for getting dressed in the morning and he’s like “oh, I’ll help you get dressed” and I look at him like wtf bc lol he’s such a moron but also ??? but then he sees Kelly and bolts, though he was laughing too and trying to justify that comment (badly) and for perspective, I tell Kelly and she immediately picks up my phone to see it and I’m like no, this just happened in person and she’s like what the actual fUCK bc that is not the level FS and I are in person so it’s not just me ok

and then later I see him sitting with Aussie Essex and when I go to speak to AE he’s like “hi??” and me, not hearing him but seeing him watching me, am all flippantly like “oh hey” and carry on but it throws me tf off bc we’ve had our one convo of the day inside the lecture theatre and this is getting weird and i’m immediately like ?? did he sit with Aussie Essex knowing I’d say hi? wtf?

then it’s the end of term pub quiz collecting money for charity (I’m using so much ‘then’, it’s disgusting and u can see i’m not in writer mode) and my gut tells me to avoid FS bc he’s leaving after lectures the next day but everyone is like wtf no come, it’ll be chill, so I do, and it’s fine, and he’s there and right in my line of vision but i’m like w/e w/e and we kinda say hi but it’s in passing and at this point, I’m on good terms with like... the majority of the guys in his little gang (he lives with 4 of them, so I’m polite to all of them on some level) and so when HS is introducing me to his gf, it’s fine... until he’s like “oh btw I forgot to tell you - this is [FS’] girl”

??????????????????

things escalate quickly. first FS sends me hearts, I flip him off, then he starts talking and I can’t hear so I go over and that’s when I get fucking ambushed by his housemate, who I only have spoken to once or so but know his gf but will hereby be known as Buttface... about how they’ve all (FS’ friends) given every girl on each row a percentage of how much they think that girl fancies FS. I’ve scored one of the highest - 73%, alongside another girl with a slight reputation (no judgement) who has been all over FS the majority of the night so far.

the more I defend myself, the more Buttface claims that’s proof of it being true (as a lit grad, do you know how much that logic offends me???) and FS only repeats that he wasn’t a part of the convo, it was only about him so not to blame him. but he listens smugly. things escalate. i’m ashamed to admit i’m so thrown off that i am not my best and as things continue to escalate, i feel too blindsided to do what I want to (though I do half-slap FS once bc I can’t fully slap him in a room full of our course w/o Drama, and though I go to spill a drink on him twice, everyone stops me) and it’s a mess and once it’s over, i’m raging and have to leave. a lot of people stay out though, so half of the lecture is too hungover the next day... so I don’t see FS and that week, we broke off for Xmas break. but before i left, I nudged HS and was like “wtf so you and your house talk about me a lot...” (literally aLL OF FS’ housemates are familiar w/ the topic) and HS is like “nah, I reckon he fancies YOU” and I know HS is a shit stirrer so it pisses me off more

Blonde Pop is raging for me. Broski is like “meh, men”, though Percival takes offence at the shitty logic; but Deej and Cap (who I travelled with) are like lol what this is a victory. in the power struggle, you’re winning. he doesn’t think we know about all of this; but you’re clearly important enough for all of his housemates to know your name. Lulu and Dragon Jock see me the next day; I make Lulu give me a hug bc I’m like “am I giving off hoe vibes??” and Lulu, who is soft and smiley and a cinnamon roll, is all “nO IT’S LAD CULTURE AND IT’S RUBBISH” and it’s very cute and defensive of me and Dragon Jock is just like “lol i’ll hit ‘em”. which is nice.

general consensus is to ignore the fuck outta him come going back in 2 weeks but?? idk if I can? it’s not that simple bc we have the rest of the course together and I know that he’ll act like everything’s fine and if i say why i’m pissed, Buttface will use that as ‘proof’ (rather than me being horrified at their audacity, I mean CHRIST ON A STICK) and if I don’t, it’s still proof... Broski says this won’t go away anytime soon bc of that reason but that isn’t satisfactory either

and like i clearly try to blend into the bg to avoid drama and now i’m like? why bother?? when we all went for takeout in our last night in Swans before heading home, Cap was like “i find it hilarious how you have so much drama around you” and when I was all “i sit in my room and watch Netflix tho??”, he was like “... that’s why it’s hilarious” and tbh yes, but not in a funny way, in more of a dAMN IT way

fuck blending? it makes no difference? hence me accepting my femininity, bc... screw everyone else, I’ll do what the fuck I want 

but yeah. that’s the latest.

also, in slapping him, i felt his stubble and that was not the one.

berate me freely, go forth...

[lotus-tower]

on yamamoto and gokudera’s relationship

i’m two years late with this post and i’ve realized i can’t make nice, readable, presentable list posts i’m just going to copy crossy and Just Say Things when i feel like talking about them

okay so what absolutely baffles me about fanon characterization of their relationship is that people seem to think gokudera dislikes yamamoto just because he thinks he’s Dumb, whereas yamamoto is just ‘haha oh you’ and puts up with it indulgently because he loves gokudera and gokudera is his Good Friend.

while the last part isn’t completely off the mark, i feel like this interpretation of their relationship completely ignores one essential fact: both yamamoto and gokudera initially do not think much of the other, at all. gokudera thinks yam is dumb, yes, but mostly, there is absolutely nothing about yam that isn’t either incredibly threatening or incredibly abhorrent to him. gokudera doesn’t harass yam because he’s tsun, he harasses him because yamamoto being in the same space as him is deeply upsetting to him and constantly threatens the implicit Rules that govern his worldview. gokudera hates yamamoto because yamamoto is a carefree civilian who’s allowed to just join up for no reason (whereas he had to pass a fake ‘test’ of sorts), which is a Big Deal for a mafia brat who grew up on the streets of the underworld; because gokudera doesn’t understand yamamoto at ALL and thinks that yam isn’t taking any of this seriously, which infuriates gokudera because of the honour he accords the position of guardian and because of what he perceives as the sheer audacity of being that flippant with tsuna’s safety; and, most crucially, because despite all of this yamamoto is genuinely better at everything than he is. we all know gokudera has self-esteem and insecurity issues in SPADES, and interacting with yamamoto automatically sets those off at maximum intensity.

and yamamoto? is fully aware of this. he knows gokudera doesn’t like him and treats him pretty unfairly. he just didn’t know the extent of gokudera’s dislike until the gamma fight, because part of him was hopeful that since they were Teammates, gokudera had to like him at least a little bit, right? but like, this is half the reason yamamoto is initially... kind of condescending towards gokudera. he doesn’t show in his behaviour, because he’s a Good Boy and tries to be polite, but the thing is, yamamoto knows he‘s stronger than gokudera. he doesn’t make a big deal out of it because he’s not an asshole and doesn’t particularly care about things like that when it comes to Friendship, but heeeee’s definitely aware that gokudera... isn’t all that strong? or reliable? and gokudera’s behaviour towards him just makes him even more “haha ok.” he laughs it off because gokudera is so theatrical about it and yamamoto has no idea how relationships actually work. it’s kind of the only way he can continue to go unbothered by it (though as we see in the gamma fight, when he isn’t putting forth the effort to not take it seriously, he is Very Bothered--yamamoto isn’t all that honest with himself, ever). the slapstick dynamic we see with yamamoto’s attitude towards gokudera being essentially “sure jan” and gokudera spitting fire at him is funny because it’s a Joke but also in terms of characterization it means yamamoto definitely has to be at least somewhat dismissive of gokudera in order for this whole thing to be sustainable?

for example, after the gamma fight, gokudera gives a genuine and earnest apology to yamamoto, saying he was scared and unfairly took it out on yam, saying things he didn’t mean. yam, in return, says.... “i also said things i shouldn’t have.” aka yamamoto meant all those things he said to gokudera--this entire time, yamamoto thought gokudera was doing an extremely poor job of being a guardian and that he had no idea what he was doing. he just never said anything because, well. he’s yamamoto. he doesn’t say things! he doesn’t want to cause any friction in the team, so he usually just lets everything slide (partly due to fear of losing the only place where he can belong, and partly because he is deathly allergic to confrontation and internalizes everything instead of dealing with his issues). that’s why he’s  “easygoing”: he won’t disturb the status quo at all unless he has no choice (see: never bringing up reborn’s secret ever again because they forgot to ask him again), but uh, he’s extremely perceptive and in fact knows More Things Than People Think and has a lot of Opinions about things.

  yamamoto is also a little shit, and a large part of how he deals with gokudera’s behaviour is by......... winding him up on purpose, because yamamoto thinks it’s absolutely hilarious (it is). yam deals with a lot of things by turning them into a jokes! it’s just a Thing. maybe it’s not healthy but hey, Now It’s Funny, and funny things are good. yam KNOWS that gokudera takes his whole “mafia game” thing literally, but never bothers to correct him, because he thinks it’s fucking funny that gokudera is so baitable. obviously, this does NOT help gokudera be less annoyed by him. these boys are really dumb. 

yamamoto doesn’t DISLIKE gokudera, though. despite everything, he has high hopes of Being Friends with gokudera. he also can kind of guess where gokudera’s anger comes from? he can’t do anything about gokudera’s insecurities though (hell, he wouldn’t even know where to begin, or even how to formulate the thought--he’s a 14 year old jock he doesn’t know what the word insecurity means). he doesn’t really know where they stand, but he’s??? tentatively optimistic??? maybe??? he’s very attached to the fact that they are Teammates. a team ties people together, and yamamoto Knows teammates. he can do Teams. this is what he’s good at. the mafia is a Team Game and all his teammates are Extremely Important and he’s gonna win this you guys. he tries his very best to LIKE gokudera, which is why he’s always laughing and turning things into jokes, because gokudera is a lot more likeable if you turn him into a meme (this is applicable to all uptight or angry fictional characters): it’s a lot easier to get along with someone who’s always angry at you if you can go “oh you ahahahaha you’re always such a riot gokudera.” yamamoto actually really is strangely endeared by gokudera, probably because 1) gokudera is sometimes really Relatable 2) you will never understand a warrior’s bond 3) once yamamoto has successfully installed them into a Routine (which is partly why he never corrects gokudera on anything, so they always end up repeating the same arguments), gokudera and all his mannerisms become a familiar comfort instead of Attac 4) they hang out and stuff sometimes and it’s really chill?

just think of it this way: yamamoto is a dog that Loves gokudera, but doesn’t respect him in any shape or form. he is an EXTREMELY friendly dog, and so he will wag his tail and ask to play with him and lick his face, but only when he feels like it, and if gokudera tries to tell him to do anything.......

lol

this dynamic only really begins to change in the latter half of the future arc, after they’ve had their big fight! the frustrations they’ve had with each other ever since the beginning of the series finally bubble up to the surface and they blow up in an extravagant mess. they finally confront each other on their Feelings about each other, while also revealing other Emotions they’ve been experiencing that obviously neither acknowledged in the least up until then. (so. bad. at feelings and communication.) it’s at that moment that they finally start respecting each other, not only as people, but as fellow guardians! you’ll notice that in all subsequent arcs, gokudera is much less aggressive towards yamamoto, only griping for what seems to be the principle of it. it’s Routine now. (thanks yam) all this culminates in the peerless wonder that is the tandem bike scene. it’s a beautiful metaphor for how their relationship has evolved.

tl;dr-- yamamoto and gokudera’s relationship is actually extremely complex and fascinating, and it’s a crying shame that fandom simplifies it for the sake of tsundere gokudera and red-blue rivalship. gokudera is not tsun: he actually genuinely dislikes yamamoto in the beginning of the series. neither considers the other a worthy rival: gokudera thinks yamamoto isn’t qualified to even be a candidate in the mafia race by virtue of his character and background, whereas yamamoto doesn’t think gokudera is competent or strong enough to be on his level. they would both destroy each other in an instant for the position of tsuna’s right hand man. thankfully, they later become asshole friends and settle into a friendlier, heat-less version of their old dynamic.