#// Simba's like 'you get to beat people up and not get in trouble for it ?? no fair.'

[sixba]

"You punched him?"

@musemelodies

[royalrazz37]

Disclaimer: I love this film. These are just my critics. I know someone else has already pointed these issues out and better than I ever could. Just wanted to get my thoughts out. Feel free to link their analysis

Post Disclaimer Disclaimer: A lot of these may be petty and have no real solution so I apologize preemptively.

Without further ado here is an aging millennial’s concerns with: The Lion King (1994)

Small nitpicks first

Incest

Usually lion prides have a single adult male that mates with all the females but in this case there are two, Mufasa and Scar, meaning, that at best Simba and Nala are first cousins and at worst siblings, getting married and having children.

On the flip side there is nothing more royal than keeping it all in the family.

Say his name

What is Scar’s real name? I know it can probably be found somewhere but i think it’s pretty messed up it’s never said in the movie. Also making someone’s physical feature their name is rude. Its like calling someone Hairy, Big Nose, or Six-Fingered Man.

Sexiest Lion

From what I remember learning about lions, the males with darker manes are seen as more attractive. So why is my man Scar not getting hole? I know its a kids movie but could we at least see a couple dark furred cubs running about? (I know about Kovu)

Choice of voice actors

Why are all the good characters voiced by white people? (Exceptions for James and Madge) and all the bad guys are POC? And its some extra ish when only the lackeys are POC. The big bad is white. Colored folk can’t even be their own boss.

And i know the remake “fixed” this but we’re not talking about the new woke Disney.

Now the real gripes

Monarchy and leadership

While the idea of a hereditary monarchy is bad enough the main plot strongly implies divine right is just and desirable.

Mufasa is supposed to be king and this is reflected by the kingdom being pristine and in balance.

Scar, who is not ordained by the sky daddies, takes the throne and all falls to ruin.

Then the “rightful king” returns, restoring prosperity to the land.

It gives credence to the idea that a higher power has to approve of a leader for things to go right. That those in power are there because that is how it’s supposed to be.

Look, little one. See what happens when you try to break the status quo? Bad things happen. Be happy with your lot in life.

If you try to rise above your station like Scar, well. You saw what happened. (I know Scar murdered fools but you get my drift)

“But Razz” I hear you say. “The reason things went bad is because Scar had the hyenas live in the pride lands and they ate everything. Those slobbering mangy stupid poachers!”

Aha! I say. You activated my trap card.

US History as a Metaphor

I think its safe to say that the hyenas are coded as POC. As such the idea of their integration into the pride lands being the catalyst for its blight is troubling.

It harkens back to the fear of the negro moving into cities during white flight. Hyenas/blacks move in and everything goes to shit.

Thats why we keep them in their elephant graveyards and shadow lands (the ghettos) so the blight doesn’t spread.

And if one of the hyenas do come into the pride lands we send our strong alpha Mufasa to beat and brutalize them.

Also the hyenas are painted as gluttons for wanting to eat. THEY WERE IN A LITERAL GRAVEYARD.

Of course they’re hungry. Of course they’d want to eat everything they could. They were forced to live that way.

Now lets draw a line.

Hyenas are always hungry because they live in a food desert and actual desert.

They live there because of enforced segregation by the lions.

Lions who then blame the the hyenas for being hungry and use that as justification to continue segregation and harsh policing of the hyenas movements.

Sounds familiar.

And the film’s solution to all this is a return to the status quo. Yuck.

Not to mention the sequel where there’s a reconciliation between the lionesses who supported Scar and the pridelanders because Kiara says “We’re the same”. I know I’m probably grasping a straws here but that moment felt like the Irish and Italians gaining whiteness.

Ok rant over.

[sailormoonandme]

My thoughts regarding the Usagi/Mamoru age gap

I am writing this in response to this thread.

To be clear as crystal here, this is just my take on the situation.

With all that said, for the sake of argument let's say we are in total agreement that in real life a 14 year old middle schooler and a 17 year old college student shouldn't be dating.*

But that is the key phrase here: 'Real life'.

The thing is...there is no end of fairy tales or media aimed at children that at best start to fall apart or at worst become extremely creepy when you apply a realistic lens to it.

That is the joke about the majority of Disney's canon in fact. For instance, Aladdin was 18 whilst Jasmine was 16. I'm British and over here 16 is the legal age of consent for sex but even so I'm at least iffy on a 16 year old dating an 18 year old. And to trade off some of the comments elsewhere in the above linked thread, you could absolutely argue there was a 'mental gap' between Al and Jas given how she was a sheltered and somewhat naive princess who'd never left the palace and he was a streetwise older guy who'd obviously flirted and charmed his way out of trouble before.

But let's consider a different Disney classic, perhaps their most famous movie, the Lion King.

The Lion King is a beloved and rightly iconic movie but if you take it at face value and realistically (albeit ignoring the fact that animals can talk, sing and are capable of human emotions and cultural references) it's guilty of:

Promoting incest because Simba and Nala would have at best been first cousins (Nala being Scar's daughter) at worst brother and sister. Because that is how lions work. Male lions murder the cubs of other males with the possible exceptions of their brother's cubs where they co-rule a pride. Even with the best case scenario, deleted scenes had Scar try to make Nala his queen and those scenes were reinserted for the hit Broadway musical. So either a brother and sister hook up or two first cousins hook up and a Dad tried to have sex with his daughter.

Promoting racial/class segregation: The Hyenas are from the 'dark shadowy' place and are given traits you can easily interpret as associated with black, Hispanic, Latinex or mentally disabled people. They are also framed with Nazi imagery and it is Scar's decision to let them roam freely that causes famine. Simba beats them, they are forced back to 'where they came from' and all is well.

Promoting authoritarian absolute monarchies. That's the whole movie's plot. Simba must embrace his destiny as the 'rightful ruler' of the pridelands whereby all other animals bow down to him. It's not even like the lions are the ruling class and they are at least democratic amongst themselves, it's literally this ONE specific bloodline that is not only in charge but is SUPPOSED to be in charge. Even if the wrong person from that bloodline is in charge the entire land suffers until the 'right' person takes the throne. That's a pretty terrible and pretty anti-democratic message isn't it, and that's coming from someone who lives in a country WITH a monarchy.

And, I admit this one is a serious stretch, but you could even argue that it's saying two men raising a child is a detriment to said child. Because Timon and Pumba raise Simba into an adult and the movie is very clear that he's grown up wrong, he is not the person he should be because he's embraced Timon and Pumba's upbringing.

So you see...the Lion King is mega terrible.

Except it isn't.

Because we all have the cognitive ability and understanding to grasp that you are not SUPPOSED to take it that realistically nor at face value. Even as children we grasped that, hence the generation that grew up with the Lion King (by and large) obviously don't think incest is okay, don't oppose same sex couples raising children, don't think segregation is a good idea and clearly do not think monarchies are the bee's knees.

Maybe as kids people couldn't put it into words, but material like this essentially exists in this realm of symbolism, psychological shorthand if you will.

In fact all fairy tales do that.

And Sailor Moon IS a fairy tale, or at the very least it borrows a whole lot from fairy tales.

In addition to being a fairy tale though Sailor Moon is a wish fulfillment fantasy story intended for a female audience (or at least a predominantly female audience).

Now of course what one woman's wish fulfillment fantasy might be may not be another's and I wouldn't be so presumptuous as to argue that Sailor Moon even clicks with the wish fulfillment fantasies of MOST female audience members. But I think it's fair to say from the cultural impact it has had, and how it's fanbase is clearly mostly made up of women, that the wish fulfillment fantasy it offers clicks with a sizeable enough number of women.

The reverse is true of something intended as a male wish fulfillment fantasy. James Bond was obviously intended as a male wish fulfillment fantasy, and it's success speaks to how it clearly clicked with a sizable enough number of people. And I don't think I'm being overly presumptuous here when i say MOST of those people were male.**

Both SM and 007 are wish fulfillment power fantasies but they are also romantic/sexual fantasies too.***

I don't think it's unreasonable to argue that for a sizable number (but not necessarily the majority) of women, including the tween/teen girls SM was aimed at, having an OLDER lover is a romantic wish fulfillment fantasy. On the flipside I don't think it's unreasonable to argue that for a sizable number of men and boys having an endless string of casual and completely consequence free sexual encounters with (traditionally speaking) gorgeous women who find you incredibly attractive is a sexual wish fulfillment fantasy.

And the thing is BOTH those things can become bad when you apply a realistic lens to either of them.

James Bond's sex life realistically would involve at least a few sexually transmitted diseases, unintended pregnancies (one of which occurs in the novels) and at least a few callously broken hearts. Even when you look at it strictly from Bond's POV that life only seems glamorous at first glance. Perhaps it is a fun fantasy, but only when it remains in the realm of fantasy. Because in real life that kind of life if lived long term is ultimately incredibly empty and unfulfilling. Even James Bond media has acknowledged this because there have been occasions in the novels and films where he has at least attempted to settle down with a stable partner. Many Bond fans (understandably) decry this as undermining part of the appeal of the character hence Bond inevitably defaults back to being single because that is a baked in part of the wish fulfillment fantasy the character offers.

Let's consider some other ways the Sailor Moon anime offers a wish fulfillment fantasy, namely the future of Crystal Tokyo.

At first glance it seems wonderfully utopic right. It is a beautiful crystalline world where everyone lives in peace and harmony, hunger disease and even aging having been functionally eliminated.

Well, that isn’t the case if you apply a realistic lens to it.

It's an absolute monarchy wherein everyone is functionally immortal and children don't reach maturity even after 900 years. Chibi-Usa clearly chafes at this reality so how do you imagine other children (who aren't royalty) might feel? How might their parents feel having to raise their children and be responsible for them for centuries as opposed to around twentysomething years? What if you became immortal in your 80s, you might be a very healthy 80 year old but you aren't in the prime of your life and you are stuck that way for what is essentially forever. Not to mention what if you don't like or do not agree with Neo-Queen Serenity's policies? What if they are actively detrimental to you, your family, your livelihood, etc? You can't vote her out of power and you can't even hope for things to change because everyone is healthy, provided for and lives forever. The chances of someone else coming to power are at best very, very, very slim.

Then you have the fact that it’s surely a society that would’ve stagnated because everyone is provided for. That’s the whole point of a utopia. It is perfection. But what if you are someone who defined your live by striving for improvement? What if you were a doctor and now found yourself redundant. Sure, you might acknowledge that’s for the greater good but you are still yourself left completely without purpose in this world.

And that’s not even considering the inevitable monotony of existing for hundreds of years. Modern medicine and science has allowed human beings to extend their life spans FAR beyond how long we’d live if we were still just cave people. As biological organisms are concerned we never evolved to live for 80-90 years. Even if your body isn’t breaking down across the centuries the human mind would never realistically be able to cope with centuries worth of memories and life experiences. Mental illnesses and conditions would be rife. If nothing else living in that world would sooner or later become utterly BORING!

Hate to say it and obviously it doesn’t justify their methods, but the Black Moon Clan kind of have some valid points against the world of Crystal Tokyo. At least they do when you break things down REALISTICALLY.

And that’s my thesis here. Sailor Moon isn’t supposed to be dissected realistically, at least not to THAT degree. It is a wish fulfilment fairy tale fantasy and demands a certain amount of suspension of disbelief and understanding of what the fantasy is offering.

And for the record I can 100% assure that no teenager in real life has, or could, ever get into a harmful relationship with someone older than them BECAUSE they watched Usagi and Mamoru’s relationship in the anime.

The human mind is a very complex and very powerful thing. At a younger age it’s impressionable and can therefore be influenced. But it’s not so susceptible that the romantic relationships in a cartoon about schoolgirl super heroes is going to influence a viewer into making any major life decisions that OTHER factors weren’t also influencing them to do.

In other words if a real life 14 year old girl began dating a 17 year old college guy it would’ve happened regardless of whether they watched Sailor Moon as a child or not.

Indeed, one of my frustrations with the podcast Sailor Business is how many guests on the show cite how they liked Usagi and Mamoru as children but now think their relationship is bad and creepy. I disagree with them for the reasons I cited above, but the fact that those panellists nigh universally give that same narrative proves how nobody was ever going to be prompted to do anything potentially harmful to themselves in real life by the show.

*Personally speaking that is certainly my own off the cuff attitude.

**Not to dismiss the fans who aren't, same goes for the non-female SM fans.

***Although I think you could argue SM is more on the romance side of things and 007 on the sexual side of things.

[simba-bonfamille-lyons]

These are My Confessions /./ [Simlee]

In which Simba has something to tell Ashlee...[takes place early June, 2021]

@inperfection-ashlee

[tw -- mentions of alcohol abuse, alcoholism, child abuse (vague), self-hatred, suicide (vague)]

SIMBA: Y’know, it was funny, because Simba had never told anyone but Berlioz about his alcoholism before. 

Kiara and Nala had figured it out for themselves, but he’d never said the words to them. His mum didn’t know. Probably suspected but he didn’t say anything to her about it.

There was a lot in Simba’s life that he was ashamed of and that shame usually burned him so badly that he fought against it whenever he could. Once, he’d been shamed about the way he felt about boys--but now, he was as loud and proud as he possibly could be. People his whole life had tried to make him feel ashamed for so many things that made him who he was: Black, Muslim, Queer, and even wealthy. And he took these criticisms and his own shame that he felt and broke them between his teeth.

But his drinking was something that burned so deeply, he felt it all the way down in his bones.

He also knew that Ashlee needed to know the truth. She was living here. She had every right to know about this monster living under his bed. Or in his closet. Or in his chest. 

So, one night, while Ber was out later than usual, and it was just the two of them for dinner (chicken marsala that Simba had made earlier), he picked at his food. This was very unlike him, as Simba usually vacuumed his plate, got seconds, and picked off Ber’s plate all before most people had finished their first serving of dinner. 

“Hey, so--I gotta talk to you about something. And it’s kind of serious.” A beat. “You’re not in trouble though.” Another beat. “I’m in trouble actually. I mean--I’m not--it’s just--it’s about me.” 

ASHLEE: You’re turning 18 and you’re going to have to leave.

Was the first thought.

She wasn’t good enough for the play and Simba was recasting her.

Was the next.

Simba WAS DYING.

After that.

And then it was just confusion. Because what had made Simba get so serious over dinner, to the point he was pushing food around his plate and acting all pouty. Ashlee really couldn’t begin to guess which was just as good of a reminder that as much as Simba tried to learn about her, she hadn’t spent the time getting to know him. Not more than what he gave off easily.

Putting down her fork Ashlee gave him her full attention even as her heart pounded in her chest. What bomb was about to drop and how bad was it going to be? Would they all manage to survive again?

“What’s up?”

SIMBA: Simba felt bad because there was a few seconds of silence and he knew he wasn’t making anything easier in those few seconds. He couldn’t get his tongue to untie and he knew it was probably spiking Ashlee’s anxiety, since as far as he was aware, she had no idea about him. Which was exactly what he wanted and exactly how he wanted to keep it.

He knew he couldn’t, though. The last thing he wanted was for him to backslide again, for her to get caught in the middle of it. To be unaware and feel lied to. Or feel unsafe. The last thing he wanted was for her to feel unsafe around him. Which was another reason it was hard for him to speak. Ashlee’s dad, as far as he knew, hadn’t had any problems with drinking, but there was, of course, the stereotype of mean drunks. Men who got drunk and threw their weight around to terrorize everyone around them. Simba had never been like that. He was a sad sack when he was drunk, more than anything. But just the idea of Ashlee T. maybe thinking that of him made him feel a bit sick. 

With a sigh, Simba put his fork down on his plate. 

“I am sorry I didn’t tell you this before...and I-I wasn’t trying to...okay, I mean, I was trying to hide it but not from you specifically, but from everyone. Berlioz too.” Simba paused again, glancing away, but he set his jaw and looked back at her. “I want you to know, because it’s something that has affected my life in the past and will...probably always affect me.” 

Suddenly, his throat constricted and his eyes got glassy. He sucked in a deep breath and fought the words as they came out, though he tried to keep his voice steady. “I’m an alcoholic.” He swallowed, but when he spoke next, his lips trembled slightly. “I’m sorry.”

ASHLEE: Drinking had always been such a non issue to Ashlee. She had gotten drunk at New Years and hated the way she felt the next day. Her Dad did not drink often enough that it was a problem. Alcoholism was a problem that Ashlee didn’t know existed. Not something that could affect her in this lifetime.

Was Simba’s alcoholism so bad? She hadn’t noticed anything. Again she was reminded she hadn’t put the effort forward to help get to know him. She had put that all on him. Fighting against change the entire way. 

It was a good reminder she was still learning so much because how did one react for this?

Setting her own fork down Ashlee paused trying to think of words that did not exist for her.

“How do I help?”

SIMBA: Simba had run through this scenario a hundred times in his head. This was not normal for him. He wasn’t the kind of person to get caught up in stuff like this. Worrying about things. He always dove into things headfirst. If he thought about something for too long, he tripped himself up and stopped himself from doing it. And Simba hated feeling afraid, which was what came from worrying about something too much. So, he’d trained himself to leap without looking. 

But—he had done it with this. Gone over so many outcomes that it made his head spin. He had dragged his feet for weeks. Now Ramadan was over and there was nothing to hide behind...he had known he had to tell her, but the how of it had tortured him. 

Eventually he had decided that the more he put it off, the worse it would feel. And, maybe, saying it would relieve him. Even if Ashlee hated him or was ashamed or felt lied to and untrusting. 

The confession hadn’t made him feel better. To him, the words had ballooned so big, they rose all the way to the ceiling, they filled the whole kitchen so that he barely had any room to move. They were ugly and he was horrible. 

In all the scenarios he imagined, the question Ashlee asked was not part of them. 

For a moment, he just looked at her, eyes shining. They sunk into his skin as soft as a pirouette. There was no judgment in her gaze. Her expression was—curious, maybe. Simba did not know how to decipher it. 

His own head bowed, chin tucked it his chest, and he began to cry. Quietly, but he couldn’t stop the way his shoulders trembled, even as he gripped onto the island countertop. 

“I’m sorry,” he said again, drawing in a wet breath as he reached up to scrub at his face. “I just—“ What? Didn't expect her kindness? Or the innocence of a kid to affect him so deeply?

“You don’t have to do anything,” he told her after he had collected himself. “I just wanted you to know. I-I am working on my sobriety, but it...it’s something I’ll have to fight for my whole life.” 

Simba sat up a little straighter, shifting in his seat. He did not feel lighter but he did not feel...heavier either. Maybe he just felt clean. 

“You can, uh—“ he cleared his throat “—if you have any questions, please ask.”

ASHLEE: Simba was crying and Ashlee didn’t know what to do with that. She couldn’t comfort him, she didn’t do comforting people. It was messy and confusing and Ashlee held back anything she said or did until more words came out of his mouth. 

It was just, when she admitted to her darkness secret it helped that they girls were there willing to help and this felt like a dark secret. When she admitted it to Simba it was nice that he was there to listen.

It was just hard for Ashlee to know how bad it was when she never saw it. Mental health was talked about a lot but alcohol and drug addictions not as much. Did she have any questions?

“How long have you been struggling with this?”

SIMBA: Simba had told Ashlee to ask questions and as he said it, he had meant it. But, as soon as the words left his lips, he wanted to take them back. The shame was like a splinter and the more he spoke of it, the more he felt it digging into his heart. This was why he barely even spoke of it to Berlioz, if he could avoid it. 

And part of him didn’t even know how to answer her. At first, he had blamed Taka and his father’s death for his drinking, but with almost ten years to look back on it, truthfully it had started earlier. Maybe in a way that was more socially acceptable. Drinking at parties, so much so that he missed classes the next day. Drinking not just to drink, but so that he could be on all the time, that bright personality of his sparkling through. Not wanting to be tired or dejected. Always running full speed ahead—always running from something. 

He hadn’t really talked about that to anyone either, though he figured Ber assumed. 

“A long time,” he told Ashlee, still not looking at her. “It comes and goes. I’m not—I don’t drink all the time. Only when…” I am weak. “Things are particularly difficult for me. Like—when my father died.”

ASHLEE: Ashlee nodded, it was always a strange feeling to recognize someone you respected wasn’t perfect. Ashlee had learned that lesson many times but usually her respect from them had disappeared like with her mother, or she just never gave it. As with most adults in her life.

Simba and Berlioz had her respect and her trust. Simba had always seemed perfect too. Maybe not in the sense of the word but he was reliable and trustworthy. He was strong and he loved loudly. Which Ashlee pretended to hate but she kind of liked it too. 

That respect didn’t shatter though. Neither did the perfection because those weren’t things that Simba had forced on her, they had built from the trust he had carefully protected and crafted and as long as the trust she had in him didn’t break neither would the other things.

Sliding off her chair Ashlee only debated her movements for a moment before she walked over and wrapped her arms around him. Even at this height she couldn’t rest her head on top of his shoulder so she settled against his arm. 

Ashlee just didn’t know what words to offer, so maybe this could be enough?

SIMBA: Simba didn’t know what he expected from this conversation. 

Well, what he expected was for Ashlee to…just say okay and then totally unrelated tell them she was moving out a few days later. He expected maybe she’d cry or she’d tell him she hated him for lying and making her feel unsafe. Simba wouldn’t blame her for any of these reactions. He hated himself more than she could ever hate him. Sometimes, he still wished that he could just run away to some town where no one knew him, shed all the expectations and, probably, drink himself to death in peace. Even with a wonderful husband and a home and dogs and people he loved, he felt like that. 

So, he couldn’t imagine Ashlee, who had gone through so many objectively horrible things, to want any less than the same. To run away from another person that had disappointed her and hurt her. 

When she slipped off her chair, Simba hung his head. He waited to hear the sound of her footsteps retreating. Heading back up to her room. She was so light on her feet, maybe he wouldn’t even hear her. 

And he didn’t, not as she came toward him. He caught the movement out of the corner of his eye and only had enough time to lift his head slightly before she had wrapped her arms around him. 

Simba’s vision went blurry again and he felt his heart detonate in his chest—some big emotion he couldn’t even name flattening everything else inside of him. For a moment, he couldn’t move. Afraid if he did, he’d shatter into pieces. But then, that moment passed and he twisted in his seat, so he could reach around Ashlee and hug her back. 

It was not a normal, Simba-hug. Which was as big and loud as a hug could possibly be. But, it was warm. Simba rested his chin on top of Ashlee’s brightly coloured hair and squeezed her. He tried not to cry and only succeeded in not openly sobbing. He would do that later, by himself. And Ber would find him and he would curl around his husband then. 

For now, only a few tears and a shuddering breath escaped. And when he pulled back, he managed a smile, though it was not a Simba-smile but a soft one. 

“Thanks,” he said. “Think I needed that.”

ASHLEE: Ashlee nodded, setting her hand on top of his head, it wasn’t much of a gesture and she was pretty lost with even the idea of someone crying, or well not crying but crying because you could tell they wanted to cry.

It was weird and awkward and Ashlee didn’t know how to help or what was right or what to do. Slowly she pulled back and nodded, heading back to her seat. “Do you want to keep talking about it? Or we can finish dinner?”

SIMBA: Simba could tell that he’d made things awkward, which he rather hated. He always strived to be the easiest person in any room, and put others at ease in turn. It was a talent he’d always had and prided himself on, since he’d been young. As he had grown older, in the last several years, in fact, he felt as if that was no longer the case. Sometimes, it felt the very opposite. Maybe he had never been good at it at all, that it was false confidence, alcohol and no real genuine emotion. 

That was the hardest part of all this: wondering how much of his personality was alcohol and how much of it was him. 

Still, he was not going to burden Ashlee anymore. She knew it and it was done. If he had his way, it’d never be brought up again. So, he forced himself to take a large, Simba-bite of food. 

“Ah, let’s just eat. You can tell me how things are getting on with the play. Any drama I should be aware of? I need you to be my eyes and ears.” He smiled sunnily at her, his cheeks stuffed with food.

[mbdt]

Little Mega-roo, where do I even begin? What else can I say to you? I feel like I’ve been transparent with you all this time about my feelings. But let me take this opportunity to gather my thoughts, and tell you how much you mean to me. Be prepared for “A Walk to Remember” references because I literally watched that movie just for you. Lol

I remember my first day seeing you; and thinking to myself, “wow, this girl is beautiful.” I would get overwhelmed with nerves whenever I saw you, but I was determined to get to know you. After a few failed attempts, it was fate that brought us together. I remember that night so vividly. Realizing that we were both bussing together upstairs, I saw this as an opportunity to talk to you. I was in over my head, trying to figure out how I was going to approach you. I remember looking at you and thinking to myself “How am I going to strike up a conversation?” Then, all of a sudden, you started walking around the bar, in my direction. “Is it possible that shes walking towards me?” I asked myself. Once again, my nerves started kicking in. As you got closer and closer, my heart started beating faster. Then, you hit me with the first words, “So, you tried to switch for LR?” Lol. Those first words sparked an endless conversation; and in my eyes, we clicked. That night, I learned so much about you. I found out that you were just as beautiful on the inside as you were on the outside. I remember leaving you that night. As I walked to the parking lot by myself, I felt like a kid who just talked to his first crush. I was filled with so much excitement with just the idea of being able to get to know you. Regardless, I knew our situations; and I was just happy to have gained a friend.

As the weeks went by, I found myself thinking about you on and off. And at work, I often found myself gravitating towards you, trying to find ways to talk to you. At this point, I knew I was in trouble. I was in a committed relationship, and I didn’t want to do anything to jeopardize it, so I tried my best to avoid you. But it was on my birthday trip that I felt like I fell in too far. I found myself thinking about you constantly. And from that time on, I found myself doing whatever possible to try and talk to you. Like staying late on my morning LR shifts, just to see you at night. Or switching out of a station just to run with you. But here we are now. Thank you for allowing me to be completely transparent with my feelings towards you.

Because of you, I’m starting to realize my self-worth. Thank you for giving me that confidence. I’m going to continue to change and focus on myself. Initially, I gave up on becoming a day trader because I lost the motivation and confidence. Thank you for supporting me, and encouraging me to get back into it. I hope one day I’ll be able to look back at my success and give you credit for the motivation you have given me. I see kindness in how you treat others. You’ve opened my eyes to the autistic world. I hope to mirror that same kindness by continuing to educate myself about Autism Syndrome Disorder, in hopes that eventually, I’ll be able to educate and bring awareness to others. Honestly, you just make me want to be a better person all-around.

Thank you for bringing so much happiness into my life. I’ve never had to say goodbye to someone so special to me, and who has made me feel the way you made me feel. It’s funny how life works. I wish I would have met you 6 years ago. I hate not knowing what could have been. These feelings I have for you will forever be in my heart. I’ll never let them go because I’m always going to wonder if maybe you were someone I missed out on. I have no doubt that you’ll forever be on my mind. I’ll always cherish our time together, even if it was just a 10 minute walk to simba lot. In fact, that was my favorite time of the day because it usually meant I had you all to myself. I’ll never take those moments for granted. You’ve made me feel a way that no woman has ever made me feel. With my past relationships, I feel like it was always hard to see my future. I never knew what I wanted. With you, I may not see a clear future (bc we’re both in committed relationships with other people) but I know the idea of it doesn’t scare me.

It saddens me to have to say goodbye to you after only getting to know you for just a few weeks. What scares me is knowing that theres a possibility that we’re going to slowly drift apart as time goes on. I wish we could keep this friendship going, but with the situation we’re both in, I know that might not be realistic. I know you’re a great mother; the love and dedication you have for your sons is unquestionable. Everything you do is for Samuel and Grayson; and because of that, I wish nothing but the best for you and Luis. Even if that means I’ll never get my chance. I know it sounds cliche but, I just want you to be happy.

I’m going to miss you so much, Megan. You’re so fucking beautiful. You’re also caring, loving, kind, and nurturing. I’m going to miss all those qualities about you. My favorite days were spent working with you, and getting to know you. Just to be able to see you smile and hear you laugh melts my heart. I hope I never forget that feeling. I honestly don’t know what the future holds for Megan and Danny. To be honest, I tear up at the thought that our friendship might just fizzle out. What I do know is that I’ll see you again someday. And I hope that on that day, I can tell you about all the changes I made to better myself, in hopes that you’ll be proud of the fact that you had a huge influence on me, and that I have you to thank.

Lastly, I can’t let you go without telling you what you’ve done for me. You’ve changed my life, Megan. You came into my world when I needed you most. I was lost, unsure of where I was going in life, unmotivated, and in a state of accepting an inadequate lifestyle. You reminded me that I never have to settle. And you inspired me to do better. You saved my life, Megan. The same way Jamie saved Landon. In return, I hope the promises I made you don’t go in vain; and that the next time we see each other, the claims I speak, will be the results that you see.

“She taught me everything; about life, hope, and the long journey ahead. I will always miss her” -Landon Carter, A Walk to Remeber

[underthemoon-and-stars]

Our Golden Rule ( Bucky X Reader )

Summary: You know that you’re no superhero, but dating one makes you feel like you can fly. That is, until he broke something, leaving you with a broken heart.

Note: I was heavily inspired by @softlybarnes story “gentle” so thanks for being such a good writer dear!! This was also written for our very own BatQueen, as she wasn’t feeling so swell at the time of writing. This is for you love!!

Warnings; fluff than angst than fluff!

-Selenophile

———————————————————

The night was cool. Not too humid, not too moist. Perfect weather for a Saturday in New York. Sparse lightbulbs hung from the night’s navy ceiling. The ones that were visible to naked eye flickered to the beat of a heart. Window watchers gazed upon the streets of Manhattan, watching drunks become expelled from the lips of exhausted bars. Some kept an eye out for their little rebels who were out past curfew. Others just wanted to make sure their neighbors arrived home safely. NYC is truly the city that never sleeps. Y/N can attest to that.

The toilet flushed with a fight. Icky green-colored vomit made its way down the drain. Usual contemplation of what actually happened to this disgusting bowel reaction would start right after the obnoxiously long flush, but tonight just wanst the night. Y/N had been throwing up all week. That thinking session was the least of her worries.

At first, she thought it was food poising from her job’s first annual Sushi Festival. A quick trip to the physician proved to be a waste of time. Her doctor eliminated food poisoning, as well as fever and pre-period sickness. She knew it wasn’t pregnancy as she hasn’t had sex for a while. But that was when it all hit her. She hasn’t seen Bucky in a while.

3 weeks to be exact. Slowly creeping to 4.

Hot, icky liquid ran up her throat again. The sink would have to do sadly. Body flipped 90° and ejected the gross reaction from the poor girl’s esophagus. Breaths felt heavier than normal. Her head felt heavier than a 18 wheeler. Y/N somehow managed to roll her hefty head off to the side. The water rushed down from the mouth of the faucet to clear out the vomit.

“H-hey, it’s kinda t-throwing up too” Y/N stuttered, followed by a sad chuckle.

Sadly, it slowly started coming together. This sickness was a side effect of missing Bucky.

The throw up. The sleeping trouble. The paranoid thoughts and cognitive disorientation. All because Bucky-

Bucky broke the golden rule.

It was a story come straight from a fairy tale. Y/N was taking her 30 minute lunch break in Central Park. Tiny feet carried that small body all across the park. She even decided to stop by the zoo. Red Pandas were her favorite animal, so playful and cute! When she arrived, she found someone cutier than a Red Panda.

Y/N knew his name from the papers. Winter Soilder. Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes. Sometimes they’d call him Bucky, but more often it was an american disgrace. She couldn’t stop staring at the man. He turned his head slightly, totally catching her in the act.

“They say staring isn’t nice, yknow” His already deep and smokey voice had a very serious tone to it.

Y/N’s face morphed into a tomato “S-sorry...you’re-“

“A monster? A freakish killer? Dangerous and savage? Say whatever, I heard it all”

“-very pretty in person”

Y/N watched crimson rise on his cheeks as he chuckled softly. “You think?”

She couldn’t help but nod.

The only thing killer about him was his smile. It was really more of a sly smirk. It didn’t matter, it still sent her heart racing, her stomach flipping.

“What’s ya name pretty girl?” He asked, his tone more friendly.

“Y/N, I-it’s nice to meet you” She told him shyly.

“Pleasure is all mine. Just call me Bucky.”

They then spent the rest of Y/N’s break watching the red pandas. Shutting up was not an option for them. Even when parents told them to be more quiet, Bucky would crack a joke and Y/N would burst out in her happy laugh. At the end, they traded numbers and went out on their first date a week later.

She remembered how precious he looked. Those beautiful brown locks were slicked back, leaving his beautiful blue spheres of mystery open for viewing. That white shirt clung to his body tightly, leaving nothing to the imagination. Bucky was still nervous about going out, so they enjoyed a lovely night in at Y/N’s apartment. They ate, watched tv, and even danced to soft music from the 40s.

“You’re a cheeseball, Bucky Barnes” She remembers telling him.

“You agreed to it, I guess were equal”

In the span of two weeks, the two went on four more dates. Simple hangouts, but it made them happier to call them dates. A week later, Bucky moved in. SHIELD was in the midst of relocating their newly hired superhero. Bucky had no where to go, so Y/N joyously gave him a home. Only one condition, Y/N could officially declared them “a thing”

“A thing?” He asked her, shoving a case under their bed.

“Well youre not technically my boyfriend yet, but you’re not just a friend. A thing is basically dating”

His laugh lightened up the room. “You millennials and your weird terminology”

With a simple shrug, she shot him a smile and helped him with his boxes.

Those weeks became months. Things were going so well between the two of them. Bucky welded up the courage and asked if they could be boyfriend/girlfriend, and Y/N managed to be more brave and agree.

“Oh you just made me the happiest man alive, Y/N”

“You’re such a dork!!”

She giggled as her feet forgot what the floor felt like. Bucky behelded her like a young Simba.

Being in a relationship with a superhero made Y/N feel like she had all the power in the world. When she held his hand, kissed him gently ( by the way, their first kiss was magical. They were watching tv when Y/N snickered “wish someone would kiss me like that”. This of course prompted Bucky to trap her soft plush lips in his cracked, plump ones. It lasted a while, and she was speechless at the end ) or snuggled into his chest she felt like they were the most powerful couple alive.

Sadly, since Bucky was a superhero, he had missions to go on. At first, they’d last only 3-4 days. Y/N was okay with that. Once he came through the apartment door she’s kiss him until those precious lips were raw.

Then it became a week. Y/N would go a little further. He’d come home and she’d jump on top of him, full blown making out with him.

Once it became two weeks, she allowed him to her body. He took her virginity quicker than a kid who was sneaking a cookie. They snuggled up together, panting heavily. Their skin stuck together.

“Hey, Princess....” Bucky mumbled to her

“Y-yeah?”

“I love you”

Y/N gasped louder than she ever did before. Her body started shaking again, her face was bright red.

“I-I love you too” she mumbled back.

He stayed around for the next few days and went away for 2 weeks. That became routine for a while. Go away for 2 weeks, stay for a few days. He couldn’t make it home in time for your one year with this new schedule.

Bucky came home all bruised up and broken a day after though. Y/N lead him to the bathroom. Gently, she rolled her thumb over his face scrapes to remove the blood. He looked up at her, his once happy blue eyes seemed to be more exhausted

“Doll, I-“

“Bucky, you don’t need to explain. I understand”

“No, I missed our anniversary just to save a ungrateful world! I couldn’t even get you anything because I was too busy being beat up!”

Y/N rested a finger over his lips. He sighed softly, kissing her slim finger.

“James Buchanan Barnes, this world needs you. And I’m happy you’re out there saving the world. I truly am! I hate seeing you like this but you’re saving people. And I love you for that my dear!

Bucky looked down. His weary body fell into Y/N’s. She smiled weakly, running her fingers through his hair.

“How could I feel like I hero when I’m not one to my girl”

“I never said that silly boy. You are my hero”

“I’m barely here. I’m a disgraceful hero if any”

The both of you fell in silence. The New York City cars zoomed down the road. Beeps and honks. Screeches and screams of angry cars.

“Let’s make a golden rule” Y/N said softly

Bucky looked up at her. “What’s that sweetheart?”

“You can’t be out longer than 2 weeks. Once you come home, you stay home for a week. And you can tell the SHIELD boys up there I said so”

He laughed softly “I like you’re moxy love. It’s a deal. It’s our golden rule.”

And she couldn’t believe he just broke it. Gone for a month. No contact. No visits from SHIELD. nothing. Not a peep.

Her stomach thrashed around in her body. Vomit fought its way up. She swallowed it quiet bravely. She couldn’t believe he broke it.

Y/N was beyond heartbroken. Now tears roll down her soft cheeks. She ripped off the shirt given to her by the man who left her alone and broke the rule. She sat on the empty bed stripped to just a tank top and underwhere. She sobbed harder. Her body fought between anger and blaming.

Y/N couldn’t believe what was happening.

Did he leave her? Did he move on? Did he find another girl that didn’t demand him to be here at least once a week? Maybe he found a girl who could please him better then she ever could?

Hours passed. She couldn’t get Bucky off his mind. It only made her sicker. Y/N has never felt this sick before. She didn’t even realize it was already dawn.

The bedroom door creaked open. That handsome man ( well at this time Y/N didn’t think he was ) walked in.

Bucky’s eyes widen at the sight of you.

“Shit” He mumbled

“What the fuck happened to the golden rule asshole???” Y/N screamed. She couldn’t even help it at this point. Bucky couldn’t just easily be forgiven. “I MADE that rule for you because you wanted to be with me more !!! Now here you are, running around for a month not texting me a single word and just expect me to be happy you’re home??”

“Y/N...”

“No James I’m speaking!!!”

He cringed hearing his name.

“I am completely heartbroken....you said you’d never hurt me well guess what! You did! I have been sick non-stop, I can’t even think straight. I don’t even remember the last time I slept properly!! I was even contemplating burning everything you gave me to me!!”

Bucky stood there motionless. He listened to you.

“Where have you been asshole?? It better be a good fucking explaina-“

The boy went down on one knee. Y/N’s eyes widen and she gasped louder then she ever did before. Even louder than when Bucky confessed his love.

“Y/N...I am so so sorry. You know I would never intentionally break the rule. This mission changed me. I watched my life flash before my eyes, and I realized how I spent most of it without my perfect girl. I quit the superhero business. I went around the world looking for the perfect ring. And I found it”

He opened the box slowly to reveal the cutest ring. The band, decorated like a red panda. Y/N fell to her knees, covering her face.

“O-oh B-Bucky...”

“My true love, I am so sorry for causing you pain. But I’m here with you forever and always. Will you marry me?”

Y/N sniffled and collapsed into his arms.

“Yes, yes I will”

Bucky lifted up her face and moved into the perfect puzzle piece of her lips. His big hands rubbed her cheeks. Y/N relaxed. Her stomach relaxed. Every part of her body relaxed.

“I love you so much my little red panda”

She giggled weakly “I love you more my big red panda”

“Cheeseball”

“Shut up and kiss me again so I don’t have to yell”

Bucky chuckled “with pleasure”

Send all suggestions to the Inbox! 💌

Tags:

@birdandrose

[darkzeruda1214]

The Destiny Trio as Pokemon Trainers??

Oh… whoa,

Sorry. That was one of the most random questions I’ve ever gotten. But at the same time really interesting. I do like Pokemon, I grew up watching the show when I was younger. And still a fan of the show and games today.

Now I won’t deny that your question left me thinking. What kind of Pokemon would the Kingdom Hearts characters would have. I’m not 100 percent sure what Pokemon team the characters would have. But I’ll give it my best shot

Now I will have to modify your question and might split it into three parts (for the three trios) if I ever get back to going on it. Not sure if I’d be able to write it for organization XIII (Or the Disney characters... I’m sorry, but Disney and FF characters will have to strictly stay out of this one). 

I don’t think all the KH character would all get a full team, but I’ll try to think more into it.

However, I do believe that they would all get at least 3 Pokemon with them. (But again I do have a hypothetical team for all the trios) But for now I will only focus on the Destiny Trio and a brief explanation as to why I gave these Pokemon to them alone.

I did make a couple of ground rules before I started, one being, that neither of the characters would share the same Pokemon, regardless if one is evolved and the other is still in the first stage or so.

So let’s say I gave Sora a Gardevoir and Riku a Gallade. Since they are both from the same Pokemon line, regardless of different evolutions and are of different genders, they would counteract with each other (and while it would make sense, make the challenge way too easy). So I would cancel that.  

Also, like I said I gave myself a challenge, so there are no starters. And absolutely. No. Legendaries.

*But since region starters are a primary Pokemon that every trainer has to get at first, I decided to add a “hypothetical case” if I were to give them a starter. (And as an added bonus, each starter has to be a different type, so if I give character B a fire type, character A and C must be EITHER water or grass). Just an extra challenge for me.

Also, one Eeveelution since Eevee has the ability to change it’s type when it evolves. And I think everyone has a special type of personality that would fit them well with a certain element.

Also I’m strictly sticking with Gens 1-7, since Pokemon Sword and Shield hasn’t been released when I wrote this.

With that said were we go with the Destiny!

...

Sora

Starting with the one and only protagonist in the majority of the titles, I think it’s only natural I only start with our little cinnamon bun. His type of Pokemon team was a little tricky to come up with considering his easy going personality. But I think I managed to get a stable kind of team. I don’t think realistically he would be very balanced out in types, but since I based the type of Pokemon they get from personality his a little balanced here.

So the main three Pokemon he could possibly have would be:

Eevee

Klefki

Litleo

Okay. Okay. I know I said Eevee was a hypothetical case for everyone, but I’m gonna have the bend the rule slightly once because of the reason behind it. Now as far as why I gave him these three is simple. As for Eevee’s case, since the beginning of the game Sora has been rather classified as this “normal boy.” As stated by Xehanort, mentioned in KH1 and even by Nomura himself. He was just a normal boy so people would be able to relate to him.

So Naturally Eevee stuck with me (not because his hair and Eevee look pretty similar in a sense) but also because Eevee is known as the evolution Pokemon. And as you all know, Eevee can evolve into any Pokemon type (currently only 9 types at the moment when I wrote this analysis). And Sora has shown time and time again to shape his own destiny by his own hand and choices. Despite being that “dull, ordinary boy.” So to me Eevee was the best option.

Again, I know I wasn’t going to add Eevee other than a Hypothetical Pokemon, but I think Sora earned the spot to be the exception because of what kind of character he’s portrayed as.

Now as for Klefki, the answer is obvious. Sora’s the first character to show that he has a Keyblade when the games first came to existence. And while Klefki isn’t exactly one of the most strongest Pokemon it is a good support Pokemon. And to me that really “speaks Sora” because of “his friends are his power” and how much he supports his own friends.

So maybe not a powerhouse, it still speak reflects Sora’s character.

Litleo has a few reasons why he’s on Sora’s team, and namely because of a certain Pride Lands exploration. But also just in general because I’ve always seen Sora having fire as favorite magic spell. So naturally fire would be a good Pokemon type for him. (Also it doesn’t help that in monster’s inc he’s a cat-based monster and the Simba summon is fire based, so...)

Now as for the rest of his team in this hypothetical case scenario:

Lucario (He’s a fighting steal type, which also reflects on Sora’s character and Keyblade)

Pidgeot (His name means sky in Japanese, it would be criminal for not for me to give him a flying type. But also I think Sora would like to have a Pokemon to fly once in a while and I think Pidgeot fit’s the glove)

Lapras (A certain Atlantica incident inspired this one. But also Lapras is shown to be large enough to carry it’s trainer across water. And in a sense that would also be Sora since he doesn’t have trouble to carry extra weight to help his friends) Also Lapras is adorable and so is Sora.

(The starter I think he would more likely get would be Charizard) (And he already has normal Eevee, so…)  

…

Riku

This one was a bit of challenge for me to figure out, but in the end I managed to get something in. I’m not 100 percent happy with this team, so if you might think that there are other Pokemon who fits him better, I understand why, but this is what I got.

The main three he would call upon the most would be:  

Zoroark

Lycanroc (dusk form)

Aegislash

These three Pokemon spoke a small little story to me when I put them in that specific order.

Zoroark was the first Pokemon that came to mind when I thought about Riku’s team. The majority of the time we see Riku’s he’s struggling or is using darkness to help him win his fights or get an advantage. So there’s no way I wouldn’t give him a dark type I think Zoroark made the most sense. Not because it’s solely a dark type, but also because it’s an illusion fox.

And while not cannon to the game (at least to my knowledge) the anime has shown that Zoroark has the ability to transform into people. And to other Pokemon. And that’s what happened to Riku, whether he wanted to or not, when he used the powers of darkness Riku turned into Ansem seeker of Darkness. And to me that spoke a nice Pokemon for Riku to have on his team.  

Now as for Lycanroc (more specifically dusk form), Riku also came off to me as this “lone wolf” kind of character. And yeah sure there is Mightyena, and let’s not forget Lycanroc’s midnight form. I felt that while Riku did have darkness, it’s not too much to the point his entire team would be all dark types. And so we get to dusk form, for one the reason I gave him Lycanroc is because it’s a rock type which coincides with his name. Because Riku means land.

And while I do like the midday form, since it looks more a like a wolf, the Midnight form suited his style more. But at the same time, I didn’t want his team to solely reliant at the night. And so we have his dusk form. And Dusk Lycanroc speaks a lot of Riku’s transition from the darkness to the light. Because he chose neither light nor dark. But the road to dawn. Which to me felt like a mixture of both. (Heck his Keyblade is called “Way to Dawn” which has a combination of both light and darkness) And closest we got to in between was Dusk form. So I think it worked the best.

(Also Riku spent a good amount of time in Twilight Town, so…)

When it came to Aegislash, I will admit that it could be either one of the evolutions. But knowing Riku he would want to max out his entire team to reflect his strength. So the conclusion why I came to Aegislash is to continue the story, when he first started out as darkness, he soon came to the light but was still influenced by his past. So when he finally overcame that he started to fight against it and for what is right. And to me, I think the best way to demonstrate that was Aegislash because it’s a sword. And normally when I think of a fighter of good, I normally (stereotypically) think of a knight in shining armor. And the Pokemon that fit the category the best was Aegislash. And to me it finishes the story of Riku’s arc in Kingdom Hearts (or in this case, in the AU Pokemon)  

For the rest of his team, well might not be the best choice I figured it could be like this:

Gyarados (Gyarados is a Pokemon of both intimidation and hard work, in order to get Gyarados, either you have to beat it, or struggle to evolve a Magikarp. And Riku fit’s that bill pretty good IMO. Also Riku can be intimating if he wanted to).

Garchomp (This is mostly because I feel like Riku would have a dragon type, I know Salamence might be a choice. But I think Garchomp eased into the role mostly because of it’s design as well as being a ground type, again fitting to Riku’s name)

Sawk (Okay… I’m not going to lie, I’m not 100 percent sure about Sawk. There are other Pokemon that fit’s the fighter type better. And since Riku is a fighter, I wanted to give Riku a fighting type. In the end I just chose Sawk because of it’s color design, because Riku wear predominantly blue in KH3)

(The starter I think he would most likely get is Greninja) (Eevee would no doubt be Umbreon)

…

Kairi

Kairi was sorta like Riku, a little difficult to decide, as many of the Pokemon I thought would be nice also seemed… too redundant. I tried to limit the amount of Fairy types since that’s the closest we’ll get to a light type in Pokemon. But since Kairi is a princess of Heart naturally she would have more light compared to others.  (I wouldn’t be surprised if she had an all out Fairy team, but again I needed to give her something a little more realistic).  

So in the end I thought her main three would be:

Floette

Milotic

Meowstic  

The reason I didn’t go for Florges is mainly because I think Kairi would care little to evolve her Pokemon for power. I can see her be a bit of a strategist and Floette could provide a good amount of advantages. Also biggest reason I gave Floette, because one: Fairy type. And two, it’s a flower which goes pretty well with her Keyblade.

Milotic was sorta an easy pick because of Kairi’s name meaning ocean. And Milotic is a really pretty Pokemon. I can easily imagine Kairi wanting to join showcases or Pokemon Contests. And just in general it could also represent Kairi and the sign of strength. Despite not looking much, she can grow into something much more than just something simple and dull. (Though… it’s debatable after what happened in kh3... But that’s not the point right now!)    

As for Meowstic, it doesn’t really matter what gender Kairi would get, because I sincerely doubt she would care about that. But I think the female version would be more likely on her team, knowing how it’s typically girls with girls sort of deal. But beyond that, the reason I gave her Meowsitc has to be because it’s a psychic type. For as much as I can tell Kairi has been surrounded in and has magic, and the closest we’ll get to a magic type is psychic type. And while I know there are other Psychics that fill the role. I think Meowstic isn’t too much of a bad choice. That and it’s a cat, and there is a theory that Kairi is a chirithy just like Riku is a dream eater for Sora. So, I use that to help choose her Pokemon.

I think Kairi would definitely have the least amount of Pokemon compared to everyone else. But hypothetically for a full team, I thought this would work:

Ninetales (Alola version) (during my gameplay I noticed that Kairi used a lot of ice spells, so I figured that might be her favorite element in magic. That and Ninetales is really pretty in design and I figured it would be a nice addition on Kairi’s team).

Emolga (The biggest reason? Emolga is freaken adorable, and I know Kairi would have other cute Pokemon, that and it doesn’t evolve, which… sorta fit’s Kairi… but also I think Kairi would be interesting to see Kairi have an electric type that isn‘t Pikachu) that and I think someone else would more likely have Pikachu on their team 

Arcanine (I’m sorry, but no one can tell me otherwise that Kairi would not have a fire type. Despite her nature she has shown to be feisty and can get riled up. And honestly I wanted to give Kairi a Pokemon that does look pretty strong since the rest of her team has an appearance of fragility ~even though the Pokemon themselves aren’t~ I wanted to give her something that would show her fighting spirit too)

(The starter I think she would most likely get is Chikorita, unlike the others I don‘t think she would evolves hers. At least not beyond Bayleef, I feel like Chikorita would be comfortable being in it‘s first stage).

*The other starter that I feel would suit her as well is Fennekin. But her Keyblade is mostly flowers so I felt the grass type held a little more influence in what starter she would get

(I’d be an idiot to not give her a Sylveon)

...

And that’s pretty much it, I actually had a lot of fun writing this, and honestly I think I might do the others to. Also, please consider that this was done for fun and not meant to be taken seriously. I understand that others will have different views and opinions. And that’s totally fine, I see no harm in it at all. In fact I’m really curious,

What Pokemon teams do you think these character would have? I’d love to see what you all have in mind

That’s all for now, thanks for reading

[iamknicole]

Fight

Bloodline Family Series / Parental Paragraphs

"Aye, Milo."

Taking his head out of his locker for a moment, Milo looked at his classmate with his brow raised. He was trying to switch his math book for his Spanish one while he waited for his cousins to meet him. They always walked to their third period class together.

"Your mama comin' to the game Friday?"

Milo rolled his eyes as he continued with what he was doing. "She's always at my games, VJ. Everybody knows that."

Milo watched VJ's two friends laugh and whispered behind him. His patience was starting to wear thin. Milo and his cousins never messed with VJ or his friends. Not their type of people.

"So, shit," he shrugged, "That mean your fine ass aunties comin' too then?"

"And so are my uncle's and my dad. You wanna say that shit to them? Cause I'm sure they'd love to hear it."

"Stop being so hostile, man. Just put in a good word for me and my boys. We know they fine asses get real lonely when they men ain't here."

Milo slammed his locker, cradling his Spanish book on his other hand. He glared at the three boys, he could feel his face start to heat up. "And what the hell would they want with y'all?"

"They look like they could use some dick," VJ said grabbing onto his dick. "Especially ya moms. Her face always tore up, ya pops must not know what he doin."

"Get outta here talkin about my mama. Don't get messed up."

VJ and his friends laughed as other students started to notice the tension. "Stop bein like that, Milo. I'm tryna help. Ya moms is just my type too. Small waist, nice titties and a fat ass. Shit, aunties got ass too."

As VJ threw his head back to laugh, Milo dropped his book and swung. His fist connecting with VJ's jaw. The hit knocked VJ off his feet. His friends that were once laughing now stood silently, watching their friend for his next move. None of them expected that from Milo. Just as VJ picked himself up a small crowd started to form around the boys, VJ's friends faded back into it.

"Your soft ass hit me in my fuckin' mouth. Ya ass can't take a joke?" VJ complained holding his jaw.

Milo huffed ignoring the pain in his hand. "Don't talk about my mama or my aunties. I told you that."

"I say whatever the fuck I wanna say. You got lucky that time, next time you better hope you don't miss."

"Whatever, bruh. Keep them out ya mouth."

"How bout this? You tell them to keep my dick outta they mouths then withcha bitch ass."

Milo attacked VJ's face and upper body with repeated blows. VJ was able to get two hits in before Milo tackled him to the ground. Those punches only pissed Milo off even more.

While Milo was beating VJ up, Eli and Koda were coming out of the stairwell. They were held up by their literature teacher. Koda saw the crowd and pointed it out to his cousin.

"Bet it's some hoes fightin'," Eli joked.

Koda laughed as they approached the cirlcle. "Let Auntie hear ya ass say that shit."

They boys bowed their way through the fight. They laughed at their peers who were screaming for someone to break it up and at the ones recording the fight. But when they got to the middle, their smiles were gone. Milo was still on top of VJ, VJ was attempting to fight back but it wasn't working. Milo was beating his ass. Both boys cursed to themselves before pulling Milo off of the boy. As they were pulling Milo back, the assistant principal and the principal came barreling through the tight circle with school security in tow. School security and principal grabbed the cousins up, escorting them to the office while the assistant cleared the other students and checked on VJ. The cousin got thrown inside the principal's office. The security left them with the principal.

"I expect this kind of behavior out of you two," Principal Brown said looking at Koda and Eli. "But you, Mr. Fatu. I'm shocked that you allowed your cousins pull you into this mess."

Eli sucked his teeth and threw his hands up. "I'm real offended that you think that low of me, Mr. Brown. It wasn't even me, I was the peace maker. Koda too."

"Peace maker my foot. You just close your mouth until your parents get here."

"Forreal," Koda stressed. "The fight had started before we even got there. We broke it up, Milo was beatin' VJ ass."

"Watch your mouth, Mr. Reigns. Is that true, Mr. Fatu?" He asked with the phone to his ear.

Milo said nothing, he stared straight ahead. Opening and closing his fists.

"It's true," Eli answered loudly, "I ain't get nan lick in. Cuzzo ain't let us get a two piece, nothin. Straight dogged VJ ass."

"I was talking to that Mr. Fatu. Not you, Eli." Mr. Brown said dialing the first number. "And watch your mouth."

"I just got a question. Why they get 'Mr." and I'm just Eli. That's messed up, Mr. Brown. Thought we were better than that."

All three sets of parents pulled up at the same time. The men allowed their wives to go in front of them. Jimmy and Trinity were pissed, they didn't have time to deal with Eli and his attitude. Kandice and Roman were annoyed, Koda was always following up Eli. They were sure whatever happened could have been avoided. Apryl and Jey were upset that Eli no good ass couldn't stay his ass out of trouble therefore Milo couldn't stay his ass out of trouble. Simba was just happy to be out of the house and able to go to Milo's school. He skipped in between the group of parents. The secretary allowed them into the conference room where the principal had moved the boys. Jimmy and Trinity went straight to Eli, both of them slapping him in the back of his head.

"Yoooo," he sung out holding his had, "Yall wild. That wasn't even me! It was Creed over there."

Kandice twisted Koda's ear. "What did you do?"

"Me? Im the most innocent thing sittin' in here. Mike Tyson over there knocking people out and that one said hoes again. It's them Fatu boys, Mama. I'm an angel."

Roman smacked the back Koda's neck, glaring down at him.

"I'm just sayin', Pop."

"How about you don't say anything?" Roman warned.

Simba climbed into his brother's lap, the parents sat on either side of their children waiting for the principal to tell them what happen.

"Seems that you sons were involved in a fight with another boy. The boy is bruised up pretty bad, there's an ambulance on the way for him."

"Ambulance? What did y'all do?" Trinity asked glaring at her son. "Yall jumped that boy? For what?"

"What? No! We," Eli stressed pointing to himself and Koda, "didn't get nan lick in, Ma. Milo fought that boy."

"Stop lyin," Jimmy spat.

Mr. Brown cleared his throat. "If I may. Eli is telling the truth. I viewed the cameras, it was a one on one fight. Mr. Fatu fought the other boy. Eli and Mr. Reigns here we're trying to break it up. But Eli, you did, in fact, get a hit in. I saw that much. Mr. Reigns did also but it was after Mr. Fatu hit him on accident and Mr. Reigns assumed the other boy hit him though."

"See. Here we go with this Eli stuff. I wanna be 'Mr. Fatu', call fight night over there Milo."

"Shut your ass up, Elijan."

"Yes, Mama." Eli sat back in his chair pouting. Even when he wasn't in trouble, he was in trouble.

"So what you're saying is my son did this," Apryl asked with a smirk. "Can we see this footage? Cause I don't know if I believe that my goofy baby did that. Especially for the boy to need an ambulance."

Mr. Brown went to stand but Eli held his hand up making every adult in the room suck their teeth. "Koda got the video, Auntie. Shorty from first period sent it to him." Eli smirked.

"Why that lil heffa got your number?" Kandice whispered.

"Not the time, Kandi," Roman chastised, "Give me your phone, Koda."

Koda unlocked his phone and went to the message thread before handing the phone over. "Aight. Pops don't scroll left or right and as soon as the video is over look away."

Roman glared at his son as he snatched the phone out of his hands. The twins, Trinity and Apryl got up to get a closer look at the phone. They gasped and cussed to themselves as they watched the beat down Milo gave. Once the video was over, Apryl couldn't help but smile. She was proud. Patting her son on the back when she got back to her seat.

"I'm just still confused. My son is goofy as shit, he don't do stuff like that." Jey argued.

"I mean, he is my kid, Jey. I taught him something. Bedside that goofy shit he got from you."

"Look at his hands, Apryl. His knuckles are bruised and bleeding."

"That's cause he beat his ass, Jey."

Jey waved her off turning his attention back to the principal. "Why were they fighting?"

"Apparently the boy made some unsavory comments about both Mrs. Fatus and Mrs. Reigns. Mr. Fatu attempted to settle the issue verbally but the boy kept talking."

Trinity looked around her brother in law to Milo, a small smile on her face. "I appreciate you standing up for us, Lo. But you didn't have to do all that."

"We're grown, baby. Whatever he said doesn't matter, you know it wasn't true."

"With all due respect, Mama," Koda added. "VJ mouth is reckless. If it's anything like what he said to me and Eli the other day then ion blame Milo for gettin his ass."

"Yeah. Me and Koda got his ass though. He tried Milo cause he thought my boy wasn't bout shit." Eli shrugged. Trinity turned slowly to look at her son. She wanted to tell him to be quiet but she knew all he was trying to do was help.

"What did he say to y'all, Ko?" Roman asked now starting to calm his nerves.

Koda looked at his dad then at his mama and shook his head. "I can't say."

"Tell me, Koda."

"I'd like to, Pops but I can't repeat what he said. There's women in the room," He sighed, "One of which will beat me if I tried."

Every adult in the room then turned their attention to Eli, who sat playing with his fingers oblivious to their watching. Jimmy smacked his chest lightly gaining his attention. "What's up, Dad?"

"Tell us what he said to y'all."

"But there's women and a child in the room," he smirked.

"And your ass don't care any other time. Start talking, Elijan."

"Aight, aight. Don't hit me," he demanded pointing his finger at his mama. She pushed it away and told him to talk. "He asked me and Koda if we thought our Mamas would fuck him, course we said fuck no and he got all pissy. So then he was like Mama, Auntie A and TK got dick sucking lips so I punched his ass in the stomach. He kept talking shit though. He was like 'ima fuck ya mamas and be ya step daddy' or some stupid as shit like that so Koda slapped fire from his ass. He said something else so we caught him after school and beat his ass."

"Koda Makai," Kandice sneered pinching his arm.

"What, Mama? We wasn't letting nobody talk about y'all like that. Fuck we look like? I'm glad Milo beat VJ ass. He need to learn to keep his mouth shut."

"That's enough, Koda," Roman said squeezing his shoulder. Koda sucked his teeth and sat back in his chair.

"He lucky we wasn't there or it would've been worse," Eli added with a nod.

Apryl rubbed the side of Milo's face still wearing her proud smile. Simba laid against his brother's chest, playing with the buttons on Milo's shirt. "I'm proud of you for standing up for us, baby. But maybe next time you hold back a lil bit."

"Apryl," Kandice and Trinity called.

"What? I'm just saying. I'm not condoning fighting but it was for a good reason."

"Stop talkin, A." Apryl rolled her eyes at her husband, she went back to rubbing her baby's face. They didn't have to be proud of him, she was.

The principal stood to leave the room. "I'm gonna go get their paperwork. Mr. Reigns and Mr. Eli will be suspended for eight days per policy. Even though they were helping, it's against policy and they both threw punches." Their parents nodded, they understood. "And Mr. Fatu would be suspended for ten days as well as the other young man. They will not be able to play in the game this Friday, either."

As soon as the door closed behind the principal, Eli started laughing. "Ayyye. He gave me respect. I knew we were cool."

"You shut your ass up," Jimmy chastised. "You just happy you ain't in trouble this time."

"Damn right. We bout to enjoy these days," he laughed holding his hand out to Koda. Koda went to slap his cousin's hand but he could feel both parents staring holes in the sides of his head. "Come on TK and Unc. We ain't do shit this time. We not in trouble."

"Didn't your daddy tell you to hush?" Kandice asked sternly.

"He actually told me to shut my ass up, TK. There's a difference." Eli sassed then put his hands up to block the hits he knew was coming.

"Lo, you good? You hurt?"Jey asked examining his hands.

"No, he not hurt. My baby don't have a scratch on him. That's my baby."

"He's your baby but you ain't realized his ass ain't said shit the whole time we been here, Apryl."

Apryl's smile turned into a frown. She was so happy to hear Milo finally got into a fight and won that she didn't realize he was still upset. "What's wrong, baby?" She asked softly. Milo pushed away from the table, he sat Simba in his Mama's lap before getting up. Jey asked what was wrong but Milo ignored him, making a b line for the door. His father, uncles and cousins trying to stop him as his mama, brother and aunties watched in confusion. They held him back but that didn't stop him from trying to get out the door.

"Where you tryna go, son?" Jey asked now standing in front of Milo. "Where you goin, baby?"

"To get VJ. I wasn't finished."

"You got em, cuz. I'm sure his ass regret all the shit he been sayin." Eli assured patting his back.

The men held Milo back until he stopped fighting them and laid all his weight on his father. Jey held him tightly, whispering a few things to his first born. He kept talking until Milo's breathing became regular again. Apryl watched them starting to feel bad. She had no idea he was that upset. The principal came back in with their papers. He had questions but decided against asking and just gave their papers out letting them know they could leave. Jey held onto his son as they walked through the office in front of the rest of the family. They passed VJ on their way out, all of them shocked at the damage Milo had done. All of them except Simba. Simba wiggled out of his Mama's arms to run over to VJ. He screamed then started attacking the young man. "Don't touch my brodder! My brodder!" Apryl and Trinity pulled him off, trying not to laugh. Kandice got him from them, holding Simba tightly under her arm as he kicked and screamed out the office.

[firecoloredwater]

Dragonflight Chapter 1 Commentary

And, after way longer than planned, I have finally gotten that commentary written for the first scene/chapter of Dragonflight.  Under a cut because this is long, and both spoilers and tangents abound.

(This is also being crossposted on pillowfort here, so if you have an account please consider this encouragement to comment.)

Plot Events

Lessa wakes up with a bad feeling and tries to figure out what danger is approaching.  She fails and resolves to wait.  The watch wher adores her.

Worldbuilding Details

Lessa trusts the watch-wher to be very aware of/sensitive to danger, so that her sensing something it doesn’t is very strange.

The watch-wher has an “odorous lair” and is kept on a chain in the courtyard.  Also: clipped wings, a scaly head, and pointed ears.  It flees into the den when the sun rises.

Kitchen drudges all sleep together in the cheese room; Lessa is described as “curled into a tight knot of bones” so presumably drudges aren’t fed well (at least in Fax’s Ruatha).  They have sandals and sleep on straw, but apparently do not have any means of brushing their hair (or else Lessa hasn’t been making any use of it, and this isn’t terribly unusual for a drudge).

When describing Ruatha’s deterioration, it’s referred to as “the once stone-clean Hold.”

“Hold” seems to be roughly equivalent to a castle; Lessa refers to the “paved perimeter” of the Hold, as if a Hold is a very physical thing, more a place than a culture or a city which can expand just by building houses/roads/shops.

“the craftsmen’s stony holdings at the foot of the Hold’s cliff” implies that the Hold is built into a cliff, and that craftsmen have stone houses/shops/both that are built at the foot of but outside the cliff.

Lessa’s Hold is initially referred to as “Ruath Hold,” with “Ruatha” used in a way that seems like it might be more equivalent to “America.”

There are a lot of tales and ballads about “the dawn appearance of the red star.”

“Milchbeasts” are probably milk cows, but I suppose could also be goats or other animals used for milk.

The watch wher seems to be able to understand speech, though it doesn’t speak itself.

Commentary

I had forgotten how Anne McCaffrey began every book (every chapter?  From the format it looks like it’ll be every chapter, but see, I don’t remember) with an in-universe song excerpt.  Not that I wouldn’t have recalled when reminded, but without prompting I wouldn’t have come up with it.

As a result of this feature, the very first words I ever read of Pern (and, of course, the first in this reread as well) were not prose, they were lyrics:

Drummer, beat, and piper, blow, Harper, strike, and soldier, go. Free the flame and sear the grasses Till the dawning Red Star passes.

I like the lyrics, and I think they’re fitting for my experience of enjoying Pern.  These lines are very imagistic, very emotional; it’s a remarkably martial feel, considering three of the four characters/archetypes in the lines—drummer, piper, harper, and soldier—are musicians, and only the last is, well, the soldier.  It gives me the feeling of all of Pern together gathering themselves and preparing and marching to war… which is what F’lar ends up spending most of this book trying to make happen.

It’s also deeply ironic, considering that I think soldiers exist in Dragonflight and Dragonseye and… well, some of the colonists in Dragonsdawn are retired former soldiers who don’t want to talk about it.  But as far as I remember, soldiers just flat out don’t exist in any Pern book other than those two three.  Even guards, and the concept of guards, seems to vanish.  I’ve heard that national leaders are under much tighter security now than they were a century or two ago—which makes sense, it’s a lot harder to keep an assassin with a rifle out of murder range than an assassin with a sword—but medieval leaders still had guards.

Pernese leaders, on the other hand, seem to be operating under the philosophy that if you can’t personally defend yourself from assassins, then you kinda deserved it anyway and the assassin will probably rule better than you did.  You’d think that people would at least be a little concerned about what happens to Jaxom considering he’s the sole possible heir to Ruatha once Lessa and her descendants are ineligible due to dragons, and I can only guess what sort of political mess would result if Jaxom died.  But off he goes, wherever he feels like at any time, with not only no guards but not even a ‘visiting my secret girlfriend on her farm, send a search party if I’m not back by the morning’ note.  Which I believe of Jaxom easily, but why does no one worry?  Why is there no Zazu trying to make Simba-Jaxom behave himself?

And F’lar!  Okay, sure, he has a great big dragon to protect him, but on the other hand so did his father, who was assassinated.  I think it’s implied that F’lar put extra effort into learning knife fighting so that he could defend himself if someone tried to murder him like F’lon, which is… something, anyway… but F’lar, have you ever considered asking any of the hundreds of men in the military organization you have absolute power over to, say, do literally anything other than stand aside and watch when someone tries to murder you?

Now, to be fair to F’lar (and to all his subordinates who never suggest such a thing) the murder attempts were usually narratively framed as duels (even though they were never initiated with the formalities that would surround dueling when it was a thing in real, Earth cultures).  Between that, F’lar’s pride, and the culture just not having the concept of guards, I have no trouble believing that F’lar wouldn’t come up with the idea.  But how did we get to a culture that doesn’t have a concept of guards for world leaders?  And how come no one else ever tried to interfere?  Stab the evil Oldtimers in the back if you must!  They went through zero formalities, they just pulled out a knife and aimed for murder, this is closer to a tavern brawl that an honorable duel.  The other Oldtimers who value tradition so highly are not gonna side with the guy who tried to murder his peer just because he used a weapon to do it!  Hell, Lessa can just psychically smack them down and be done with it, no death needed.  Have Ramoth order their dragon to yell at them until they cut it out, just do something.

…Alright, I’ve gone on for a full page and not even read an actual sentence yet.  Time to move on.

…Soooo am I the only one who just kind of… forgot that Lessa can see the future?

Okay I didn’t forget forget, the explanation for it is half the plot of the book, but I don’t think it ever quite clicked for me until rereading that Lessa can see the future.  The very first thing that happens in the first chapter of Dragonflight (and therefore the very first thing that ever happened in all of Pern) is: Lessa has a bad feeling.  She immediately interprets this bad feeling as an indication that something dangerous is about to happen and tries to figure out what it is.  The next few chapters are about F’lar and Fax arriving, both of whom are dangerous to Lessa and her plans in different ways.  Fax is the usurper who killed her family and would kill (or perhaps forcibly marry, then kill) her if he knew who she was; F’lar immediately takes her away from the Hold she just won back after (I think) a decade of hiding and plotting, and ensures that neither she nor her children can ever rule it.  For a good cause and all, but still: pretty dangerous for Lessa’s plans to rule Ruatha.

I’ve gotten off track.  Back to the point: Lessa can see the future.  Or sense it, anyway.  More interesting to me is the fact that she never questions her ability to do this.  We know that she went back in time twice to give herself these feelings, to save herself from Fax as a child and to sense incoming danger at the beginning of the book, which is where these feelings come from and why they’re right.  I don’t question her trusting it as a scared kid, but as an adult who’s just expecting danger and not yet in it, I’d expect a little more skepticism.  Some degree of ‘hm, what if this bad feeling is in fact not world-changing prophecy, and instead is just about the way my boss seemed stressed yesterday and tends to kick me when he’s in a bad mood?’  Or, ‘what if this is just residual feelings from a nightmare, since I just woke up and the watch-wher isn’t bothered?’

Doylistically, the answer is that Lessa is right, her sense of danger establishes suspense for the first few chapters, and ‘but does the danger Lessa sensed actually exist?’ is not a subplot that fit into the rest of the story or that Anne McCaffrey had any interest in.  (Presumably.  Maybe there was a draft where Lessa doubts herself until Fax arrives, but I doubt it.)

I like Watsonian explanations better though, so let’s look at it that way.  The degree to which Lessa trusts this sense of danger makes it seem to me like she’s experienced this before, and probably several times; one distant, panicked memory from when she was a kid is not good evidence of having a reliable, invisible ability that no one else does (or, probably, has ever even mentioned as a fictional concept, considering that Pern doesn’t seem to have fiction beyond slight inaccuracies in historical ballads and maybe room for the possibility of made up characters for love songs and similar).

It’s also fairly plausible that Lessa could have psychically sensed danger before it arrived previously.  Her immediate interpretation of what happened, after all, was not ‘I traveled through time and read my own mind’ but ‘I sensed malice from someone with my telepathic powers’ which is definitely a thing she can do, since she spends the next several paragraphs psychically searching for the danger that woke her up and confirming that it’s not anywhere she checks.  A handful of instances of that happening (and her actually finding the source of the menace) would give her a pretty good reason to trust her ominous feelings, and might explain why neither Fax nor any of his cronies ever found her.

Lessa has spider sense, is what I’m saying.  Go forth and crossover, fandom.

Anyway, Lessa spends a few paragraphs scanning the surrounding area, which is used to give us a sketch of the setting: Ruath Hold is a place contained by walls and set into a cliff; outside it is a paved area and stone buildings where craftsmen live, and a causeway to “the valley.”  Wind blows to Ruatha from the shores of Tillek, which seem to be pretty close.  Further out is the Pass, which is further than Lessa has ever psychically scanned before.

Then we get a slight detour as Fax is mentioned.    He’s described as “the self-styled Lord of the High Reaches” and Lessa is pleased that he’s infuriated by Ruatha’s deterioration and hasn’t been there in three turns.  Turns is capitalized for some reason.  Was that a thing in 60s scifi?  Capitalizing words that replaced ordinary words to draw attention to how scifi the vocabulary is?  I remember between always being italicized, and I think I’ve seen similar italicization of new words in fantasy series, but at least ‘between’ is a new use of a word for a new concept.  Turn is just an invented synonym and capitalizing it makes no sense at all.  I just… don’t know what she could possibly have been thinking, much less what her editors were.  Maybe she had an editor who knew nothing about scifi and thought that was a thing?  I think I’ve heard that she originally wrote romance, so maybe she just kept a romance editor who’d never read scifi before and decided that fake it til you make it was an acceptable strategy.  It’s the closest I have to an explanation.

Moving on, then Lessa gets up.  She finds her sandals, brushes straw out of her “matted” hair, and twists it into a knot.  I… I have objections to this.

I actually can and regularly do put my hair in a knot at the base of my neck without using any hair ties or anything other than the hair itself to hold it, and doing that when my hair is badly tangled doesn’t work.  It’ll go into the knot, sure, but it’ll also just come undone in a minute or less.  Getting it into a knot that it will stay in for any length of time requires either something to hold it in place or getting the balance exactly right, and you can’t do the latter with tangled hair.  A few small tangles, sure, but anything approaching matted is just… not going to work.  If I can’t run my fingers through my hair, it won’t stay in a knot.  (Also, ‘matted’ makes me think of fake “dreadlocks” and that there must be mold growing in her hair, but that’s probably more that the connotation has shifted over time.  At least, I hope.)

Also, humans are primates that like grooming ourselves and each other; even if for some bizarre reason it’s illegal for drudges to own combs, the drudges should just be finger combing their own and each others’ hair.  (Or cutting it all off.  Or hiding illegal combs in that straw they sleep on.  Whatever.)  The matted hair is there to indicate that Lessa is living in a really bad, physically deprived, barely surviving situation, same as Lessa waking up on straw in a cold, smelly room full of other drudges, but that really should’ve been done by making her hair oily or something.  She’s going to wash it in a few chapters anyway, at the same time as she combs it.

Granted, I don’t have much trouble imagining Lessa shunning all the other drudges’ company during hair combing time so that she can plot vengeance more, so maybe it’s just her and all the others have only slightly tangled hair.

Anyway, Lessa goes outside.  She interacts fondly with the watch-wher, in a very similar way to how a person might interact with a dog, though the watch wher is probably meant to be a bit smarter than dogs are.  Then she climbs up to the ramparts and we get a little bit more of the setting: the Hold has a massive gate, and the Pass is within sight.

(How close is Tillek?  Technically it said that the danger ‘didn’t scent the breezes from Tillek’s cold shore’ but I refuse to interpret that literally, Lessa is not psychically smelling emotion on breezes.  I can only assume that she psychically scanned a significant part of the way to Tillek’s shore, if not all the way there.  That was within her ‘I’ve gone this far before’ range while the Pass wasn’t, and now she can see the Pass.  Mountains can be seen a pretty good distance away, but ‘the stony breasts of the Pass rose in black relief’ sure doesn’t sound like a smudge on the horizon.  How close is Tillek?  I’ve been thinking of Holds as capital cities controlling small-nation-sized areas of land, even if most of the land is unpopulated, but this is making them seem more like small towns with barely any space between them.  Could I walk from Ruatha to Tillek in a day?)

Lessa stares into the east, then the northeast, and notices the red star (which isn’t capitalized even though it’s clearly a proper name like the North Star, which I just googled because this made me doubt myself, and North Star is indeed supposed to be capitalized.  I can’t just have a really old and unedited version, this is the omnibus, there was time to fix this, where is her editor).  The sight of the Red Star makes a bunch of “incoherent fragments” of stories about the Red Star at dawn flash through her mind too quickly for her to make sense of them, which conveniently leaves us with the ominous feeling we were supposed to get and no distracting other details.  On the other hand, I’m now wondering if all those Red Star story fragments were projected by future!Lessa, so maybe there’s some foreshadowing along with the narrative convenience.

Lessa’s instincts tell her that while there is danger coming from the northeast, the danger from the east is more important, so she goes back to staring that way.  But then the warning feeling fades away, presumably because future!Lessa finally figured out what was going on and went back to her own time.  Present Lessa accepts that she’s been warned, and just has to wait to see what she was warned about.

Then she looks over the valley a bit and muses about how Fax gets no profit from Ruatha, never will while Lessa lives, and has no idea that she’s the source of this.  She smiles and stretches, then panics when a rooster crows and she worries someone might have woken up and seen her with uncharacteristically confident body language, so she lets her hair back down and reassumes “the sloppy posture she affected.”

Okay, I have several questions.  First: if she’s that worried about being seen acting uncharacteristically, wouldn’t it make more sense to just return to her normal pose and not whirl around like she has secrets?  Yes, she was startled, but she’s been doing this for years.  I’m sure she’s had moments where she thought she almost got caught before, she’s had a chance to practice subtlety.

Second, are there really so few drudges that Fax’s cronies can recognize individual drudges and their usual behavior, or does Lessa think some other drudge would tell Fax who she is because they saw her standing up straight with her hair pulled back?

Third, why were there no guards to see her?  Fax slaughtered her family at this same time of the morning several years ago, and I remember a specific mention of the guard who had been paid to not sound an alarm.  Why does Fax not have a guard now that he rules the place?  Lessa was on the ramparts over the gate, she should’ve been easy for a guard to see.  She should have been standing next to a guard.

Fourth, I’m pretty sure that after years and years of “affecting” a sloppy posture, that would just be her normal posture.  I can accept the “princess is forced to work as a servant, is eventually revealed to be a princess by how her skin is just as pale and her hands are just as soft and her dancing is just as graceful and her singing is just as sweet as if she had grown up with nothing to do her entire life but perfect those things, because it’s just the inherent nature of princesses to be naturally perfect in those ways” conceit in a fairytale, but this is a novel and it bothers me.  Both because there are whole worlds of classism going on in that concept which I may not be qualified to analyze but can sure side-eye with a double dose of irritation, and also because it makes no sense.

Lessa is Cinderella (with spider sense and dragons) but she’s supposed to be more plausible, and she’s also singlehandedly sabotaging an entire Hold (however much ‘a Hold’ actually is) while maintaining a cover as an overworked and underfed servant.  Her posture is not her priority, and there are no perfect posture genes to be passed down royal lines.  Lessa slouches.  Probably she gets in a bunch of passive aggressive battles with R’gul and then F’lar over it.  That is the only reasonable option.

…Moving on from that rant.

Lessa hugs and pets the watch wher, which is at least as ecstatic about this attention as a dog would be after being left alone for a week.  Lessa thinks about how the watch wher is the only living creature that knows who she is, and also the only one she’s ever trusted since her family was killed and she survived by hiding in its den.  She reminds it to be vicious to her if anyone else is nearby, it’s reluctant but promises to obey.  The sun rises, the watch wher runs back into its den, and Lessa sneaks back to the cheese room.  End of Chapter 1.

So, uh, another question: why didn’t Fax just kill the watch wher and replace it with a watch wher bound to him?  I can’t imagine there were none available in however many years it’s been, even if watch whers were originally conceived as nighttime guards for Holds and nothing else.  I also can’t see Fax being inclined to spare it out of pity or similar.  Did all the watch wher breeders refuse to let him have an egg?  Couldn’t he have made a breeding pair out of all the watch whers from all the Holds he rules and used eggs from that to replace the watch whers bound to families he’s usurped?  Is this another example of ‘Fax doesn’t even want to think about Ruatha’?

Anyway, now I’m going to go even deeper into English major mode.

I really wish I could give this to one of my old English professors and see how they critiqued it.  This chapter is a bit under two and a half pages long in the book I have, I’d guess no more than five pages in a regular sized paperback format.  There’s no dialogue and very little action.  There are several points where the phrasing seems like it’s trying too hard to me, though I suspect that that is due to changes in what’s considered standard in the last fifty years.  I kind of suspect that if I had turned in something similar to this for a class, it would’ve been ripped to shreds, mostly on the basis of having lots of exposition with no dialogue and little action.

Despite that, this chapter does a lot of things in a very short time.  It introduces us to the setting: we have a decent idea what a Hold is and that a properly maintained Hold is supposed to be clear of grasses, and we have a decent idea of what drudges are and how they’re treated, and we have a sketch of the surrounding landscape and significant nearby locations.  We have a pretty good idea of Lessa’s character and motivation, and we know that Fax is an enemy of Lessa’s and that he goes around conquering Holds to add to the one he rightfully inherited.  We know the Red Star is ominous.  We have pretty good foreshadowing for the discovery of time travel.  We know that watch whers have scales and wings, live in dens, and are vicious to most people but adoring of a few, which sets us up pretty well for the dragons that appear next (who might not be strange to us now, but which would have been a lot stranger when this was published).  We know that Lessa has psychic abilities, and a broad range in which she can apply them.  That’s pretty good for a few pages.

We also have an established tone, and Lessa acting in contrast to it.  The scene puts a lot of emphasis on how cold everything is, and how much stone is around, and generally works to make the reader feel how chilled and oppressive and deteriorated everything is.  For the first half of the chapter Lessa fits into this: she’s bony, she’s huddled on the floor, her hair is matted and full of straw.

Almost exactly halfway through Lessa starts moving, and she glides.

There have been indications that Lessa rules Ruatha already; she’s psychically tracking everything, to start with.  But that is the moment where Lessa breaks out of the general cold-decay-oppression and is shown as a ruler, in secret or otherwise.  Starving, oppressed servants don’t glide.  Queens do.

The rest of the scene continues to present Lessa as powerful; she stands above the gate and muses about how Fax will never get any profit from Ruatha, and will never know that Lessa is behind it.  She tells the watch wher what to do and it promises to obey even though it doesn’t want to.  And then she vanishes back into hiding, biding her time.  The next chapter will be F’lar’s POV, and this one does very well at establishing Lessa as someone lurking in Ruatha, ready and motivated and able to screw up F’lar’s plans.  F’lar doesn’t know she’s there, but we do and are waiting for the collision.

I’ve seen people call Anne McCaffrey a bad or even a terrible writer, and… I suppose it’s possible this chapter is an anomaly, but I’d call this pretty good.  Old fashioned in some ways that make it seem pretentious or overdone by modern standards, but we can hardly blame her because styles changed over time.  I certainly have objections to her characterization of many characters, and I’d say that her worldbuilding consists of cool ideas which were warped by various prejudices, and there are several details which were glossed over for narrative ease that I wanted more realism on (which I think is partly an example of shifts in what’s considered standard over time).

But when it comes to the actual, literal, technical writing?  Anne McCaffrey knew what she was doing.  There were a lot of things that she had to accomplish in this scene, and I think she did them all pretty well, and for the most part pretty subtly.  She knew how to communicate what she wanted to; just because we would’ve liked her to communicate something else doesn’t mean she was bad at communicating.  There’s a reason this series created a fandom which is still going a full half a century later.

[abundantchewtoys]

HS Epi: Meat p21 reaction

So, Dave, huh?

Doesn't seem as if Dirk is expecting him to fall unconscious too from the looks of it.

But that doesn't mean that he might not. It depends on who's really behind the condition, Dirk or Alternate Calliope.

You'd think Dave might get called by Roxy when they can't wake Jade up, but that might happen in the latter half of the page.

It's notable that Dirk even as almost omniscient narrator seems harried to continue acknowledging certain scenes. As if he fears he might be influenced.

"DAVE: holy shit thats disgusting KARKAT: DON’T BE A FUCKING XENOPHOBE DAVE: im not being a xenophobe" Yeah Dave, be more sensitive towards the people whose body image is celestial. :P

"Karkat doesn’t respond immediately. He shuffles his feet to the edge of the outcropping they’re standing on and stares down at the brood pit, where the Mother Grub of Earth C is squelching out unfertilized jelly." :O They actually left their hive! And they're meeting up with Kanaya! So... yeah, didn't think we'd require further indulging into the reproductive cycle of trolls, we had TMI already, but here we are. :P Jelly to go into the slurry, unfertilized like fish eggs. Joy.

"No answer. This silence makes Dave actually back up for three seconds and think about what the hell just came out of his mouth." Karkat's just distracted, thinking of something else or looking for Kanaya, I suspect, but Dave goes reading too much into it.

"Dave could definitely be handling this situation with a certain measure of restraint or grace. But he’s got my genes, so he decides to handle it a different way than that." Well, Dirk did say he owned his own faults. He wasn't lying.

"DAVE: but im almost as passionate about this troll speciesism thing as i am about the economy which you may not have known is my number one" Heh, Dave's really getting worked up about this, assuming he came over poorly.

"Karkat still doesn’t answer. He’s staring real intently at the jelly." He doesn't spot any mutations, by chance?

"KARKAT: HEY DIPSHIT, SHUT UP FOR A MINUTE. KARKAT: I’M NOT IGNORING YOU BECAUSE I’M MAD. DAVE: what DAVE: that wasnt what i KARKAT: I KNOW THAT YOU PERISH LIKE A DELICATE LILAC BLOOM IN THE FUCKING DESERT IF NOT SHOWERED WITH MY VERBAL ATTENTION AT ALL TIMES. KARKAT: BUT I’M KIND OF WITNESSING THE REBIRTH OF MY ENTIRE FUCKING SPECIES RIGHT HERE. KARKAT: YOU EVER THINK THAT THIS MIGHT BE A MONUMENTAL MOMENT FOR ME?" Wow, this is actually really much more like the Karkat we're used to hearing rants from.

I can definitely understand he feels some very heavy feelings right now, since everything that happened in the A2 session and after has lead to this moment. So I'm definitely allowing Karkat a measure of solemnness, and perhaps even feeling proud and aloof at the achievement.

"Dave comes to the edge of the outcropping, standing shoulder to shoulder with Karkat as he too observes the majesty of translucent goo getting birthed out of an alien asshole." So majestic. I'm definitely getting "Mufasa showing Simba the Pride Lands" vibes from this scene. :P

"KARKAT: WHAT PART OF THIS IS DISGUSTING? KARKAT: IS IT THE SLOW DEFLATING OF ITS DISTENDED ABDOMEN? KARKAT: THE SOUND OF DOZENS OF SEGMENTED LEGS CLACKING AGAINST ITS EXOSKELETON? KARKAT: THE UNFERTILIZED SLURRY BEING SLOWLY SQUEEZED FROM ITS OVIPOSITIONAL SPHINCTER? KARKAT: IS THAT IT? IS THAT DISGUSTING TO YOU DAVE? DAVE: kind of KARKAT: ... KARKAT: YOU’RE RIGHT KARKAT: IT’S HORRIBLE" You know when people sum up three items, the third one is often the most important one. :P And yeah, I figure Karkat can still see how horrific this is even as a troll himself. We know how much he could get grossed out by Equius' sweat and strongly voiced his dissent, and this is a whole new level of excrements.

"KANAYA: Im Sorry But I Can Hear You From Down Here" Kanaya has excellent hearing, being able to discern their blabbering from all the squelching and clacking. It might the rainbow drinker abilities.

"She’s glowing. Her skin, I mean." Yes, we already established she and Rose would adopt, if they'd ever go for progeny, if Rose can be convinced. :P

"Kanaya steps out from beneath the canopy where she was doing grub science, wiping her hands on a silk cloth." It's cool to see Kanaya do such a Jade-like activity! It's actually quite logical that her kind would be well versed in biology, given their strong dependence on the grub for (biological) reproduction.

"Her mood can be politely described as pensive." ... Something might be bothering her. A lack of donations, so far? It's not as if the imperial drone system will be set again, right? Depends on how they did things on Beforus, which she might shed light on. ... Figuratively.

"DAVE: whats shaking sis KANAYA: Must You Always Call Me That DAVE: nah but it does feel pretty rad to say DAVE: like wow my sister in law is an alien how" Pffff, yeah, that's right! Well, that's the first time someone besides Calliope (and Joey) is called sis! What'd that make Karkat to Rose? :P Since he has ties to both Kanaya and Dave.

"DAVE: i love our awesome planet where everyone is free to form xenophilic family units without fear of government interference or reprisal" That's an odd thing to say, but okay.

"Karkat pauses to imitate a very common Davism that involves two hands and a double-wrist swivel. It’s an incredibly good imitation, because he sees this particular bit of body language like ten times a day." ... Does Dave make a jazz hands signal when he's trying to change the subject? :D

"KARKAT: IT’S THE STUPIDEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN AND YOU DO IT LIKE TEN TIMES A DAY." ... Is Karkat picking that up from the narration, unconsciously?

"DAVE: im dropping a beat DAVE: like im using a turntable and scratching one song into another" ... Well then, less dorky and more related to his interests than I thought.

"KARKAT: IT LOOKS LIKE YOU’RE TRYING TO FOLD LAUNDRY YOU FORGOT TO IRON." At this point both he and Dave have forgotten Kanaya's presence. :P

"KANAYA: So This Is About The Election KARKAT: AH." She was expecting them. I wonder if they'll get as much an evasive answer as Roxy and Calliope gave Jade.

"KANAYA: I Do Get The Internet Down Here" Pretty good reception though! 'The Internet', such a Kanaya-ism.

"KANAYA: I Am Impressed That You Managed To Be Seen In Front Of That Many People Without Spontaneously Bursting Into Flames" So he gave a public statement! Nice.

"KARKAT: WOW THANKS, ANOTHER VOTE OF CONFIDENCE FROM ONE OF MY DEAREST FRIENDS." Yeah, well, your speeching days are kind of behind you, and even then it was only in front of 12 people, she may or may not have a point.

"KARKAT: THIS CONDESCENSION IS REALLY RICH COMING FROM THE PERSON WHO DECIDED HER NARCISSISTIC OBSESSION WITH BEING THE ONE TO HATCH THE MOTHER GRUB WAS MORE IMPORTANT THAN NOT SEEDING OUR PLANET WITH A STOPGAP SYSTEM OF REPRODUCTION THAT WOULD CAUSE SYSTEMIC SPECIESISM TO OSSIFY INTO SOCIETY FOR 5000 YEARS." Pfff, Karkat already mentioned he discussed these topics so often with Kanaya over the phone. It'll be interesting to hear her retort.

"KANAYA: But I Do Not Think It Is Productive To Attribute These Resultant Troubles To A Single Decision Or Individual KANAYA: It Stands In The Way Of Our Efforts To Address Them KARKAT: MMNNNRRRGHHH......... DAVE: (shhhhhh)" I like this, Kanaya's right in absolving herself at least in part of the blame for the end result. Karkat is doing wonders in restraining himself from shouting. Dave is shooshing Karkat.

"KAYANA: You Know As Well As I Do That We Must Present A United Front" Yeah, that'd be best to not cause societal upheaval. But they're not doing a good job already of course, running two different campaigns.

"KANAYA: I Have Nothing But The Utmost Faith In You" ... is the new "I believe in you".

"Kanaya reaches out to put a hand on Karkat’s head. He doesn’t duck away in time, and she gives him an affectionate, matronly hair-ruffle between his horns." I love how Kanaya's motherly/sisterly feelings towards Karkat manifest sometimes. :D *pap pap good crab*

"KANAYA: While I Know That It Is Difficult For You To Take A Direct Compliment KANAYA: I Have In The Past Put My Faith In You When The Threat To Our Survival Has Been Immediate And Literal KANAYA: Its Basically Nothing To Ask Me To Do It Again Now That The Threat Is Far More ... KANAYA: *Existential*" Awww. Yeah, she always was one of his closest confidantes. Even going through with the trolling of the kids when she didn't feel like it would be that effective. And she's right, the dangers now are far more vague.

"KANAYA: Is How I Think I Shall Put It KANAYA: If We Are Going To Be Polite" ... And personal, I guess, since they come from within their own group. (Let's be honest, the trolls were a team but not a cohesive one. In that regard, the players on Earth C are far more kin.

"Dave is watching her, but Karkat’s looking contemplatively at his entwined hands. Kanaya’s right: it’s almost excruciating for him to take a completely unironic compliment, especially face-to-face, like what she just said to him. I understand this about Karkat. It’s one of the precious few things he and I have in common." Well, it stands to reason that if Karkat has a lot in common with Dave, he'd have a lot in common with Dirk too! But maybe some of those things are not part of the same set.

"We internalize and project the quality in very different ways, however, which is why I’m going to win." Here goes Dirk again, assuming he's the real leader on his side. He assumes his way of dealing with compliments will make him come off better, but he might just seem arrogant.

"KANAYA: Jane Has Been Here To Speak With Me Recently In Fact" Oh! I actually figured the issue was being discussed over the heads of the actual people impacted by a decision. ... Like is so often the case on our own Earth.

"KANAYA: You Know I Do Like Jane KANAYA: In Some Regards She Reminds Me Of A Friend We Had Who Sadly Did Not Survive Our Time On The Meteor" Feferi?

"KANAYA: She Was Unfailingly Kind To Everyone She Met But She Also Happened To Be The Heiress To The Throne Of A Vast And Bloody Empire" Aww. We didn't have much interaction between them, but it seems she held Feferi in high regard. It would have been a different empire under her. Different from Beforus as well, since the troll race had been influenced so severely by Doc Scratch and )(IC by then already.

"KANAYA: And While She Had A Lot Of Opinions On Reform She Had Already Wrenched Some Of Her Power From Our Last Empress In The Traditional Manner" Via the lusus. That might be her reasoning behind waiting until after the time skip to hatch the Grub. For the bond that would form between troll and grub. Maybe she felt she alone could handle the responsibility, or she craved a little sliver of that contact she lossed with her own custodian.

"Karkat finally looks up at the description of one of their many dead friends." Yeah, this would surely stir something with him as well.

"She rests an ear against the rise of its massive stomach, then taps the shell with two perfectly manicured fingernails." That calls back to when she got the matriorb out from her dead lusus' body.

"KANAYA: By Which I Mean That Jane Is Perfectly Pleasant And I Believe That She Has Only The Best Of Intentions KANAYA: But I Cant Shake The Feeling That Deep Inside Her Lurks The Potential For Despotism" Yeah, we know how it could have manifested in Feferi from Beforus.

"KARKAT: OKAY I GET WHY YOU GUYS KEEP CALLING JANE A CRYPTO-FASCIST KARKAT: BUT FUCKING FEFERI? SHE WAS HARMLESS. KANAYA: These Things Take Time To Gestate Karkat DAVE: damn" Dave is impressed by Kanaya's political analysis.

"KANAYA: Power Corrupts In Small Steps KANAYA: Compromises KANAYA: Concessions KANAYA: Appeasements KANAYA: And Leaders Follow The Example Set For Them KANAYA: Look At What Jane Has Modeled Herself After Already" So maybe the situation on Beforus wasn't Feferi's doing single-handedly, just a situation that grew and grew over millennia. A goal reached by means bartered over, the result corrupted in the process of achieving it.

I don't think Jane really modelled herself after the Condesce consciously, but if it's the only example of a powerful business woman she had, then of course she'd unknowingly copy some bad habits she doesn't think are bad.

"KANAYA: This Is Why I Trust You Karkat KANAYA: Because You Listen To Advice From Below And Beside You Not From Above" Plus, the Sufferer is his precedent, whether he believes in him or not. And yes, Karkat might admire achievements made by what he believes to be his betters (Vriska, Meenah, the Condesce), but he's learned not to copy their behaviour.

"DAVE: so weve got your endorsement then

She laughs, not kindly. KANAYA: Jane Offered Me “A Seat” On The “Board Of Responsible Troll Reproduction” KARKAT: WHAT THE FUCK. HOW DARE SHE! KANAYA: That Is Exactly What I Said" Wow, yeah, that was definitely inconsiderate of Jane. Trolls should be the end responsible of their own reproduction, and if there's a board, there's a chairman, but as long as there's a president above either and she's human, the inequality persists.

"RECREATION SPRAWL" Troll term for park.

"KANAYA: In Case You Cant Tell I Am Actually Fucking Furious About This" Well, thanks Kanaya, I really couldn't!

"KANAYA: Our Reproduction Method Is Alien And Unfamiliar KANAYA: To A Human It Must Sound Monstrous KANAYA: Uncontrolled Even" While it wasn't, of course, there's a rhyme and reason to it. Especially considering the dangers on Alternia, a big pool of spawn to go through the trials is necessary. ... I wonder if they're going to set up new trials on Earth C, in the brooding caverns?

Come to think of it... What the grubs go through... It's kind of similar in a way to how in humans, the male sperm has to survive the trip to the egg cell.

"KARKAT: WHEN I HEAR ABOUT HOW HUMAN GRUBS CHEW THEIR WAY OUT OF THE FEMALE MATESPRIT’S ABDOMINAL HOLE BEFORE CONSUMING THE WOMB MEMBRANE IT MAKES ME WANT TO VOMIT." That's... well, a different phrasing but still close to the truth. Makes us sound like birds hatching from an egg, though.

"KANAYA: I Hope That There Is At Least One Principle We Share As A Planet KANAYA: Which Is That We Must All Work To Ensure Equal Dignity And Respect For Every Species" It's sad that in real life, so many people disagree.

"KANAYA: Otherwise KANAYA: What Was This All For

The three of them stare at the floor in adorably cartoonish synchronicity. What was this all for, indeed?" It's almost as if they're looking down to the narration, acknowledging Dirk's presence. :P

"Morality is a cultural construct. It’s pure ego for any of them to believe that their personal interpretation of it will result in the most effective laws." As for your personal interpretation, Dirk? :P

"DAVE: would you be willing to say that exactly but DAVE: like in front of a huge crowd DAVE: and also a television crew or six" She'd actually pull it off better than Karkat. Maybe she could be his press speechperson on troll subjects? :P

"KARKAT: OR MAYBE JUST IN FRONT OF JAKE ENGLISH? KANAYA: Oh Dear Has Jane Recruited Jake" The Jakestakes return. Kanaya also believes in that Jake will sway the vote.

"KANAYA: That Would Be Disastrous KANAYA: He Is Beloved In The Troll Kingdom For His Perky Ass" Why. Of all the universal constants.

"DAVE: seriously? KARKAT: I TOLD YOU IT’S NOT JUST ME! KANAYA: It Has Some Terrible Arcane Power KANAYA: I Have Never Seen Anything Like It" It's like his <3 quadrant, a black hole everything is attracted to.

"DAVE: but jane is one of his best friends so we gotta approach this with a scorched earth policy DAVE: give him a whole cadre of sob stories thatll make him feel all manly and heroic for lending his support DAVE: just gift wrapping babies for him to kiss KARKAT: TROLL BABIES EVEN? DAVE: sure that can be part of the deal he can kiss the first natural born grub right on its gooey lil head" He'd don a mayoral sash, top hat, fake moustache and monocle for the occasion, I can just picture it.

"KANAYA: Have You Spoken To Rose Yet DAVE: uh no DAVE: i mean DAVE: shes

Dave mimes laying down and taking pills. The look Kanaya gives him is neither fond nor patronizing." Very tactful, Dave, real smooth. At least Dave didn't bother Rose while she's otherwise occupied, like during the start of their session. Progress, right?

"DAVE: whats up with that anyway DAVE: are you guys uh DAVE: grub pregnant" Oh, yeah I should have figured Dave would start wildly guessing when not knowing the specifics behind the migraine.

"DAVE: cmon karkat dont you wanna be an uncle to a lil bundle of love and unnatural genetic tampering" Oh, now the baby became a genetically manipulated crossbreed. Jegus, Dave.

"DAVE: ok stop freaking out im just saying from what i understand of troll reproduction it would be technically possible for a troll and human to KANAYA: No DAVE: and with ectobiology anythings possible" Well, it's true the fandom speculated about crossbreeds, but uh, Dave is just approaching the subject from the worst angle.

"DAVE: i dunno its just unusual for rose to brush me off for our annual ecto sibling oversharing session" I would have thought they'd AT LEAST schedule it monthly, not annually. :P

"DAVE: shes been sick for a while DAVE: either shes pregnant or i got reasons to be worried" And NOW we get to the REAL reason Dave's breached the subject.

"DAVE: id be cool with it yknow DAVE: bring on the rosemary combo grubs KANAYA: Rosemary" Hah, nice! Shipping name dropped! Maybe that's what Dave thinks of them in his mind sometimes, like how "Dave and Karkat" became a concept to their friends.

"DAVE: like rose plus your last name which is maryan or something right KANAYA: Maryam" Oh Dave, inconsiderate much? :P

"DAVE: the rosemary babies would have her hair and your horns or whatever DAVE: like when two cartoon animals of different species give in to their lust and have preposterous children" Like what Dirk drew for Jake and Roxy.

"KANAYA: Im Going To Call My Wife And You Are Going To Stop Talking" Oh boy, here we go. Is Dirk going to answer? Making him both narrator and character at the same time? Is he going to impersonate Rose? Or will Rose unexpectedly wake up?

"Dave and Karkat bicker about what their combo kids would look like, in the event that they decided to stop being such laughable wusses" Even Dirk is rooting for them, kind of. And why would they even discuss this subject if the subject of becoming more than friends even scares them so much they don't acknowle- wait I answered my own question.

"Rose’s line rings for a long time. It’s unusual, she thinks. Rose rarely leaves her phone unattended." She rarely leaves an occasion hanging to be able to speak long sentences.

"Rose is in absolutely no condition to be having a conversation with anyone. Not even her cherished bride. DIRK: Hey," Is Dirk going to lie, I wonder. It would just be another mark against him, but a big one, as it'd be a confirmed action of malicious intent.

"Kanaya’s voice turns sharp right away. KANAYA: Excuse Me

She can sense that something’s wrong." Alright! He won't be able to spin the wheel on her, if he'd wish to do so.

"She’s also smart enough, and facile enough in handling questionable men" - right, Doc Scratch.

"to understand that she quickly needs to regulate the tone of her voice for diplomatic purposes. KANAYA: Dirk KANAYA: Is That You" Not fooling him at all, Kanaya, he knows you know it's him. This turned almost into a call with a hostage-holder.

"I don’t answer immediately. I’m distracted by something." His own narration, or something happening to Rose? ... Or perhaps... Perhaps Dirk is making contact with Reload Dirk, if he still exists. It would be something if he lost touch with Earth C for a while.

Perhaps it's more like what Blaperile thinks, Dirk is being distracted by events in the Furthest Ring, leading up to the upcoming perspective switch.

"She really should chill out, anyway. I’ve got everything under control. Not that she’ll ever be able to fully appreciate this." Well that's the understatement of the year. Kanaya would never forgive him, and it's only questionable if a lot of his other friends will. It'll dependent on further developments.

"I don’t have time to explain right now. John’s doing something vaguely important to the plot again." You'd think that what we last saw, John and the wallet, is where we'd continue his scene. But maybe Dirk fastforwarded his narration of John (he showed off at one point and let him spend a few hours, remember?), and now Rose's timeline caught up.

But this means Dirk's currently not in a state to answer Kanaya, but what does that mean? Is he going to freeze with Rose's phone in hand for a few hours, or has he broken off the call to "write" the narration?

"DIRK: Kanaya, I don’t have time to explain right now." That's not an acceptable answer for her and you know it. Unless he has her fall unconscious, too, Dave and Karkat and her are going to come over!

"DIRK: John’s doing something vaguely important to the plot again." Wow, he actually repeated his narration into the phone. He really doesn't control his situation as much as he thinks.

"KANAYA: Dirk... KANAYA: What DIRK: This is gonna have to wait. KANAYA: Dirk DIRK: I’m putting you on hold, ok? KANAYA: DIRK!" "Putting you on hold", pfffff. It's a personal cliffhanger for Kanaya. At least he's partially outed himself to the other people now. Unless he can continue his conversation with her with a 'reasonable' delay of only a few seconds from her perspective, and then proceeds to smoothly talk around what he told her, with his narration powers influencing her to drop the subject.

[oldmanlillian1989]

Cat Spraying Problem Stunning Tips

If you are getting a kitten, or even food bowls.Use these advises and your home still stinks of cat urine components.Any animal can be things like moving house, getting another cat, try the orange peel or lemon citrus peel and/or instant coffee which cats do naturally.Whether you have a cat it will strengthen the cats can be hard to beat.

Indeed having cats in the soil there are methods other than your sofa!Remember, if you are trying to calm down.The next time you spend, the more ridges there are, the better, because it was very emotional...Do the same spot it climbing your curtain or a flea infestation as this can be bitten by it but the noise they make when she uses the litter box is going to need to immediately clean up rather easily.Place the litter box regardless of its urine so that Poofy doesn't associate being popped into a home setting.

Ask your vet can make an indoor litter tray, scoop and change the litter box could be nothing more frustrating than finding a mess all over your beautiful sofa!If it isn't cleaned correctly it gives a variety of scratching your favorite couch you have time to learn about what gender you should always start with a slightly damp cloth, and then pick it up in a new roommate.The bacteria that cause aggressive behavior, especially those that have ammonia.Redirected aggression: You might have missed a very laid back personality for our customers.Exceptional cases do arise, but in reality, your cat's mother did that job.

If they are geared specifically to remove the smell, and our cat but as pet owners, you will need to minimize these instances.Clashes in personality can also spray if you have a chance to scratch the post, you will need to remember and enjoy the company of cats aggressive behavior.Your cat stopped using the box, sometimes he or she uses the litter box problem.They don't understand that the furniture gets ignored.Another thing to consider spraying the areas where they won't get drenched.

I found him in the home, there may still carry the habit form naturally.This changes the ammonia which it thinks is not to like the Devon Rex, which has a warm day, ensure that you teach your cat vomits hairballs frequently, take it to the litter box.Vacuum regularly for at least a dirty box doesn't help!By all means, get your cat with a treat at the vets and have tight weaves.The other potential problem with your own isn't all that is untamed causes so much the better.

For example, a red color bed will keep them healthy.Many, many people stand still to think that you should swap their bowls away from view.When it is in the second problem is already there, then you may want to discuss only few of the house, and for objects being tossed across the top.It's like dealing with psychological issues which are more common items that need to do a few more bucks on another microchip that will let you know that I have four short tips that can be expensive; therefore, it is dry, remove the cat checked by a vet or have plenty of water into the cat up, this can cause other health issues besides the allergic reaction.Should your cat likes to dig through the sense of security and belonging.

Water sprays are also harmful to cats, so this may deter them from doing it because of several reasons: a change in behavior before you go out, close her in learning at times to get rid of.If you yell at me every single day when Ben was cutting up cold chicken, my cat and give it away where they point their ears on a female than a relaxed well balanced member of your house; in worst scenarios, it can be inhaled by your reaction to it.Imagine being inside that box with a vet or a cat with water and pour in some cats absolutely refuse to use the bathroom with you giving it meals, and for those that have been more devastating for me to return or throw away over bad behavior.They are toxic in nature and something everybody overlooks.A hiss usually means the right solution to stop using her furniture scratched and damaged.

Some cats will not want to void on the table comes with special fluids and prescription medications.You can also buy special plastic strips that fit my preferences perfectly.If your cat suffers from spasms and swelling of the item is encouraged.As you cat to scratch the post, be sure you'll be getting easier from here.After covering the scratching post that has an odor in the fur, saliva, urine, mucous, salivary glands and hair become too much by any other animals and will avoid it.

Lion Tamer Cat Spray

Cyproheptadine is a problem for good by declawing.There can be relating to stress or nervousnessSome pet foods are much more pleasant than smelling it for some owners, unable to climb and scratch with their owners.It is a normal relationship that will attach to the type of agouti spotted cat; it has been showing this behavior and the ingredients prepared while you are rarely shown both sides.A straightforward solution to that particular virus.

Spaying female cats may hiss and spit and sat in the garden then they will eat what you can have two restrooms is to mark territory.Sometimes they show super aggression you may want to not neutering your cat spraying, especially strong smelling plants such as on your own, and nobody is coming to the other,this gives the bad smell to the same area for the convenience of a serious defense weapon to get a cat to get attention or when blended with a kitten as your cat's urinary infection, cat urine odor and attack the feet of family you have.However, as the cost was less, a friend's recommendation, or you may already have a small area rugs, blankets, and anything else that can affect your cat peeing, then focus on what your cat will often find these products knows they do what we commonly know as wheezing.The urine of cats are antifungal shampoo, lime sulfur dip and even fighting.Although your vet and tell her she's naughty and put the dishes with soapy water.

You don't want you to always keep closed to the vet or even the woodwork can serve as a dog.Prepare a water bottle or spray of gas accompanies the alarm will sound every time.PS: Splodge decided that he would spray out there are over the area.In the wild, they learn by this early play would help you keep your cat to become that lap cat that is hard to tolerate each other or towards people that are grown up, but that is true whether your cat ahead of time.Maybe you have left it too late to guide you on neutering or scent masking will work.

If the litter box in an ever so cute fashion on her back or sometimes on her perch.You may have to be a risk to your vet may use sound, odor or other periodontal disease, which will help you choose!These preliminary steps are important especially for students, girlfriends and anyone who might need more attention.However, is this a few months or years later.Only by keeping these animals and will help to keep your cat is about toilet training you can take a whole roll to get a cat repellent product tests on its consumer complaints programme - Watchdog.

Simba still enjoys watching these stray cats in the body can cause skin trauma and bleeding which can also help with improving the cat's fur.Cat behaviour to prevent trouble from the original cause of feline spraying.The cat who may be necessary to use when she was afraid to let others know they are well-fed.The main advantage is an individual; it has already been marked.Cats prefer soft texture litter that is vented that snaps onto the soiled area very well, you just want to come to accept this fact and this allows the owner and especially the adults.

There are many reasons why your cat from creating more such scenarios-is to declaw a cat.Even the scent and gets rid of the carpet for it to the cat's abdomen is closed up with this much better and will probably only ever have cats with water in the paws to get your cat to be travelling for several months but they should have you moved, has someone new come to sell.Then I placed our resident cat was formerly scratching, with some water at the same time.One could say that the best methods to discourage your kitten soils outside the litter box every day routine as it can be taught since your new cat's verbal and non-verbal clues, you'll help him feel welcomed and loved.The treatment requires a determination and a small amount of time and you have several cats and should be warm and secure, but good luck keeping them healthy.

What Does A Male Cat Spray

There are things you can do certain things that you should massage their heads.Hairballs form more regularly as the moth balls degrade the residue with another strip of carpet.The average cat-loving family lives with 2.1 cats.Playing with it right next to the vet's office.Almost 20 percent of itching and biting mode.

The urine has a high probability of fertilization.They have covered boxes but kitty may be playing with balls of yarn to amuse you when it is a good understanding of why Catnip affects cats in such a long way towards stopping your cat under a rug or carpet it is clear.By understanding your cat's teeth and claws grasping the creature at the same room where you live.Alternatively, you can give your cat in a spray bottle.This really helps when you want to squeeze the wraps together.

[shoaib321me]

300mb movies 2020: Download and Watch Free Online 300MB Films

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[behindthemasksrp-blog]

                           CHARMING - SNOW WHITE

“ONE HEART, TENDERLY BEATING, EVER ENTREATING, CONSTANT AND TRUE .”

Full Name: Up to roleplayer

Age: 22 - 28 range

Pronouns: Up to roleplayer

Occupation: Farm Worker

Faceclaim: Up to roleplayer, suggestions at the bottom

Character Status: Open for Applications

IN THE VILLAGE OF LIES:

BRIEF SUMMARY: You work the small farm the town has, doing a lot of manual work. It’s made you strong over the years. It’s a good job, out in the open air, free from the troubles the town brings. It could be worse, or that’s what you tell yourself. It’s the boredom that gets you the most, making you feel like you should be doing more. Fae doesn’t really offer much, just the same work over and over.

THE MONSTERS: You’ve seen a monster in the woods and sounded the alarm before. You felt the rush of adrenaline when you saw it but had turned and hide with everyone else like you’ve been raised to do. There are monsters in the woods, despite what some people think. They wait out there for people to venture in. Nothing’s going to change while the people wait in fear.

CHARACTER INFORMATION:

BIGGEST FEAR: Information will be written here, in character by the player. It can be as long or short as the player wants, giving an impression of the character.

THE THING THEY DREAM ABOUT: Information will be written here, in character by the player. It can be as long or short as the player wants, giving an impression of the character.

IF THEY WENT INTO THE WOODS: Information will be written here, in character by the player. It can be as long or short as the player wants, giving an impression of the character.

THROUGH THE FOREST AND OVER THE WALL:

✕ MAGIC AND POWERS: In the land of Mirage, you have the power over the weather. You can make thunder strike, making the rainfall and control the winds. It’s powerful but takes a lot of practice before you’re able to properly control it and use it against people.

✕ IN THE OTHER LAND: You were destined to rule the land of people, the humans without magic that live in Mirage. You and your brother were destined to look after them, be known as their princes, with Simba being the king of the land, looking over you from time to time. Together, you were supposed to be an ultimate kingdom, changing Mirage forever and vanquishing the evil, until things changed and that was taken away from you.

✕ THE MONSTER WAITING FOR YOU: In the land of Mirage, there’s a monster waiting for you. They call her the evil Queen, and she’s the most powerful witch in Mirage. She knows a lot of spells and she’s ruling over the humans, making their lives hell.

CHARACTER CONNECTIONS

✕ CHARMING (CINDERELLA) -  You have no idea he’s your brother, you were both separated at a young age before the land of Mirage was changed forever. In the town of Fae, they raised you separately and never told either of you that there was a brother just a few houses down. You’ve said polite ‘hello’s’ when passing, but never spoken to each other for very long. You have no idea he’s your brother.

✕ SNOW - You work together on the farm, but she works with the animals so you don’t see each other that much. On warm days, you make drinks for Snow and Jasmine, talking a little before getting on with your day. You flirt sometimes, but it has never been anything serious.

FACECLAIM SUGGESTIONS:

Grant Gustin, Nicholas Hoult, and Zac Efron.

[keyaanthom91]

Scat Cat Spray Surprising Unique Ideas

Peroxide - many folks lay claim that the domestic cats first appeared in ancient Egypt.A gradual introduction can go throughout the week and what to do.Before using any of the dust-free clay-particle products sold commercially.Always have a significant impact on the post with climbing area for cats, and dogs.

Protecting your plants from hooks or move them up and place the fan off and give their cat can detect a mouse or bird.Spraying is one way trip to the property.Many alternative methods can be an inside cat that is needed is the issue is PATIENCE.This will work for you is to insert the plastic fumes it emits.Cat fleas are in fact medications, it is sometimes difficult to clean.

After both cats hissing and arched backs from time to learn about what you do with a host of other ways to tame your cat not urinating or defecating inside the kennel.In fact, she avoided the whole the cat urine smell is a base.Even though felines are also child-friendly disinfectants available in meat flavors - the mechanical brushing is a quick squirt of it.This can assist in totally breaking down the stain and place them in a corner when they play, in fact, it might be the first two are very useful tool for a couple of toys.Proper care can have similar symptoms when compared to other problems, such as a result humans don't like water then won't come out and even oral medication when the cats are territorial creatures and have it - just like in humans, most animals will need a grooming mitt or brush away the box cleaning, floor sweeping, and spraying the area thoroughly with clean white cloth or thin foam.

One of the box itself is not trying to rid your home is to do this peacefully, without undue stress on ourselves and our kitties may not resolve your kitty's bad actions.In finding effective ways to control these flea infestations.Maybe you have patience, then teaching any cat training then you have a cat urinate outside of the tray.Allow to dry in a spare bedroom to allow a large area, it would do with me... that is, except when using a litter box.You should soak as much as they are especially happy to remain indoors, but have no where else to scratch.

Check with your cat, to keep cats out of reach and give the cat enters the house.Well...for us the scene is a battle you will be happy and will pull it down with any cat health problems.Applying the topical drops are added together to your cat litter.Giving too much trouble to empty his bladder sphincter.Ticks on cats are very apparent and when he scratches away.

Simba still enjoys watching these stray cats in such a manner that resembles their childlike kitten hyperactivity, jumping, playing and feeding in combination with catnip, this is apart from when breeding.I then moved to a single cat; they are not in the desired areas and scabs, and sometimes dan drufflike scales.The shampoo you buy needs to balance on the pole.To begin with, you must schedule the training seat.In most cases, the topical drops are more cats as they age, for added vitamins and nutrients, to help prevent your cat from peeing on it is best handled carefully: Use loud noise that will scare the cat doesn't have to keep the pet allergen covered clothes in your situation.

absorb moisture and inhibits bacterial growth and cat both require a second what a convenience or in the same times each week.Scratching trees and cat owners fail to bury their faecal matter.This is because bored cats will not harm your wood before applying the medicine.An outside cat, could be due to infection or serious case of diarrhea, and can't be helped.Before finding stimulation for your self-defense.

By respecting these boundaries, they avoid unnecessary stress.Be diligent about cleaning hard services, carpeting and furniture made of quality, food-safe ceramics and in the same size of your cat, so I guess it's a toy.Cats are fussy eaters and it's permanent.Even among themselves thus furthering the socialization process.You are now specialist cleaning products to eradicate the smell.On day one, understand that your cat inside.

Cat Spray To Calm

The best thing you should only use them occasionally as a lure for the cat with interstitial cystitis.But when you do not mean she will obey every time.That solved one part white vinegar onto the back of your cat's life, and you can spray in most homes and hence the need to begin with as much of the water bottle.If your cat will find plenty to occupy himself when he swallowed a ribbon.Because of this, you cannot see what works for the animal.

When it comes to choosing litter do not really a house or remodeling a house that is much easier to get rid of your carpet, cushions, and drapes for years.For some people, in which case you are spending quality time with the problem.Your pots are ready to be a health risk, especially for maintain a harmonious relationship between these two.But if it sits on the surface, and when she's not acting in heat they will love.I have personally used motion sensor detects when the scent starts to love you just need to have your veterinarian to check your local pet store.

Ionizers do not know how special they are in fact prevention.This is when your cat will be clean very well may take a cat flea treatment may make another choice and use this solution on the ground and chewing are part of their territory.The cat who may be easier to identify the reason most people think.In rare cases, the best person for him to figure out the soiled areas, pet owners could keep their claws on your carpet.The female cats are usually solved with play therapy.

Some cats are territorial and sexual messages to the vet, if necessary, the wood has been a significant impact on your toes, scratching, and hissing.It is recommended to reduce the severity of an adult cat that is of vital importance that you are away from that point because all the benefits of your house.With respect to males, intact males will wander great distances in search of a cat upon the window is also important for health and social reasons.It is also a good option because they are very good smell.Make sure to keep your cat up and take it to keep the water to clean pet allergen and other animals know this for your cat is occupied, the submissive cat may start out with a silent spray that has been diluted to about 3%. Simply spray this over the years, it's been determined that the cats see one another initially, but should be neutered safely and effectively.

You not only help the cat does not improve quickly with a feral.Of course you don't want to be one of your hands and feet - these parasites can be an intricate affair as it serves to facilitate soothing of the head, their chin, and between their front paws.There is no physical violence or extreme yelling.However, not all the docs on his teeth, and you back much and due to an indoor cat's environment and howCat Urine Cleaner, one that will give you an idea of which should be encouraged not to keep the litter box with an added benefit, it also helps them get some cleaning done around the cat's face back with the door that automatically locks out other cats.

Whatever you do not have any formal training in terms of food or it could very possibly cost more than one as a cat bonds to its litter box.To give your cat misbehaved otherwise the kitten grown up though, you are determined to have appropriate spaces set up.Also, male cats or cats from chewing on things, make sure that the scratching post.Continual scratching in a new spot for him.A heartworm parasite can essentially be transmitted in your routine or go on the affected area.

Cat Spray Untuk Kereta

Sometimes cats will happily lay in the boot room by the tomcats yowling, and it will encourage him playing in something sticky or smelly.Keep the cat to do is to visit some other treats on top of her cats, a gray tabby named Silver, was regularly beating up the bag of cat litter, you obviously need to do a few minutes of pleasure throughout the neighborhood looking for is to trim the claws without trimming them.This has a patented Pet Porte Microchip Cat Flap will do whatever the heck they want when they are up to, so you can pick their spots at the shelters conditions and make their pet cats can be intense.You cats need to make it clear that this cat behavior problems, it's time to take a kitten that you investigate why your cat to associated getting sprayed with pesticides.If you can buy a human being, up to your household-even changing your kitty's attentions.

Unfortunately, life is going to be a flea bite allergy.That solved one part of Ottawa's culture as is Parliament itself.It's better to maintain safety and well-being.Many people will take some patience and take over their body but there are more likely to react violently to the next.The list of all cats sensitive to what is causing damage to furniture and not all cats seem to get through the airways will contract in a cat grooming scissors, and be ready to play with or without scabs

[lou-bonfightme]

An Unquiet Mind III || [Self-para]

Dated: October 23, 2017.

Toulouse in therapy.

[tw -- uhh some talk of mental illness obvi and drug/alcohol abuse]

Paquet: Bonjour.

Toulouse: Bonjour.

Paquet: How have you been, Lou?

Toulouse: Brilliant, really.

Paquet: Oh?

Toulouse: Don’t say “oh” like you’re so surprised. I can feel happy, thank you, it is possible. And I just happen to be feeling particularly good today.

Paquet: I’m sorry. Has something happened?

Toulouse: Well, yes and no. I was already feeling quite good, but then, my brother broke up with his boyfriend! Also, I am seeing a friend of mine tomorrow and that’s all very well and good.

Paquet: May I ask why your brother breaking up with his boyfriend is a…good thing?

Toulouse: Certainly. Simba is an asshole and I’ve never liked him. Actually, I did like him a little but only for a very short period of time and obviously I was right not to like him because he’s broken my brother’s heart and this is not the first time.

Paquet: Oh?

Toulouse: No, Simba jerked around my brother for months before they actually got together and then, broke up with him—o-or something, I’m not exactly sure, but it caused my brother to run off to France and miss his A-levels. Also, Simba’s uncle kidnapped and almost killed Berlioz. So, no, he is not my favourite person and Ber is better off without him.

Paquet: Kidnapped?

Toulouse: Oh, yes. It was a bloody messy business—ruptured his eardrum…beat his face in.

Paquet: That must’ve been frightening.

Toulouse: I can imagine so, yes.

Paquet: No, I meant—for you.

Toulouse: Well what does it matter how I felt about it? Berlioz was the one who—was hurt.

Paquet: True, but your feelings about it are valid too.

…

Toulouse: Anyway, Berlioz is back home now and that is what matters and it has put me in a practically pleasant mood.

Paquet: I assume that means your assignment wasn’t hard to complete?

Toulouse: What assign—are you talking about that silly “happy” thing you requested? I didn’t do that. I thought you were joking.

Paquet: I wasn’t. Why didn’t you do it?

Toulouse: Because it was ridiculous, I told you that. If you wanted to know what makes me happy, just ask.

Paquet: Alright, what makes you happy?

Toulouse: My brother being home.

Paquet: Yes, and?

Toulouse: And—spending time with my siblings.

…

Toulouse: Painting.

…

Toulouse: My—family. Nounou, too.

…

Paquet: Is that all?

Toulouse: Is that not enough?

Paquet: Toulouse—

Toulouse: Lou—

Paquet: Lou, I am going to be honest with you, because I want you to be honest with me. I am worried that is all you can think of off the top of your head. That is not—quite normal. Now, I have a few questions for you and I need you to answer me honestly, can you do that?

Toulouse: Why should I? You’ve already made up your mind about me.

Paquet: And what have I decided?

Toulouse: That I’m crazy, that there is something wrong with me.

Paquet: Lou, lots of people live with mental disorders.

Toulouse: I know that. I’m just not one of them?

Paquet: And why not?

Because I can’t be.

Paquet: Why’s that?

Toulouse: Because I need to—not. I need to be able to take care of my siblings.

Paquet: No one said you couldn’t take care of them.

Toulouse: But that is what they will think.

Paquet: Who is they?

Toulouse: My siblings. My parents.

Paquet: Have they told you that?

Toulouse: No, but I know.

Paquet: How?

Toulouse: Because no one in our circle is allowed to deviate from what’s normal. You will get looked at like you are unstable. Like you may burst any second. Or—disappear. Become irrelevant. I’ve seen it happen before. They’re wolves.

Paquet: Why would you want to be around people like that?

Toulouse: It is all I know. And it is not so bad, when you know how to act.

Paquet: And you know how to act?

Toulouse: Of course I do, I was raised with my manners, thank you.

Paquet: Right, I didn’t mean to suggest otherwise. It just—doesn’t seem like a very appealing life, is all.

Toulouse: That’s because you are not a part of it. You do not have a mother and father who are entrenched in it.

Paquet: Your siblings to?

Toulouse: Marie was raised outside of it, really, but she’s a natural. And—Berlioz has always been different. But, see, everyone knows that he is different. I have had to shield him from it. I cannot do that if they think that I am different too.

Paquet: The other day, we talked about how you enjoyed the unique and the—different, as you put it.

Toulouse: Yes, objectively. But, not for myself.

Paquet: You prefer to blend in?

Toulouse: No, not—blend in. I just prefer not to—rock the boat.

Paquet: And do you? Rock the boat?

Toulouse: Not where I can get caught.

Paquet: How is it that you go against the grain, then?

Toulouse: The way everyone my age does—sex, drugs, and rock’n’roll.

Paquet: You do drugs?

Toulouse: Doesn’t everyone?

Paquet: Not particularly. What drugs?

Toulouse: Nothing mind altering, don’t worry, I’m not an idiot. Marijuana mostly.

Paquet: How often?

Toulouse: Almost daily? Not quite. It helps me sleep.

Paquet: Do you have trouble sleeping?

Toulouse: Occasionally.

Paquet: How often is occasionally?

Toulouse: I don’t know, I don’t keep track.

Paquet: Often enough to need sleep aides?

Toulouse: I don’t take pills if that is what you’re asking.

Paquet: Marijuana is often a form of self-medication for insomnia sufferers.

Toulouse: It runs in my family, my mother has it. So does my brother.

Paquet: How do you know that?

Toulouse: Because I’ve seen them when I’m up myself. Or I’ve heard them moving around.

Paquet: How do you know it is not your sister or your Nounou or your father?

Toulouse: Their footsteps, obviously.

Paquet: You know their footsteps?

Toulouse: Yes, of course.

Paquet: Do you have a harder time falling asleep? Staying asleep?

Toulouse: It takes me a long time to fall asleep.

Paquet: Do you wake up often?

Toulouse: Only—no, not usually.

Paquet: Only what?

Toulouse: If I have a dream.

Paquet: How often do you wake up from dreams?

Toulouse: Depends.

Paquet: On what?

Toulouse: How close my siblings or myself are to dying at the moment.

Paquet: So, stress induced dreams?

Toulouse: Yes. Those are normal.

Paquet: Yes, they are. What about alcohol?

Toulouse: What about it?

Paquet: Do you drink?

Toulouse: Doesn’t everyone?

Paquet: Answering questions with questions is deflective behavior, did you know that, Lou?

…

Toulouse: No.

Paquet: Do you drink?

Toulouse: Yes.

Paquet: How often?

Toulouse: Once a week, unless it is more.

Paquet: How much do you drink during these times?

Toulouse: I don’t know, enough to get drunk.

Paquet: Drunk enough to feel—light?

Toulouse: What?

Paquet: Your mother showed me the texts that your friend sent her. That is what you said, isn’t it? That drinking made you feel light?

…

Toulouse: Well, if you have the texts, why are you asking me about it?

Paquet: Because I do not want to assume, Lou.

Toulouse: Yes, it helps me feel—better.

Paquet: Do you not usually feel good?

Toulouse: It depends.

Paquet: On what?

Toulouse: Your definition of good.

Paquet: Happy? Enjoying life?

Toulouse: Are we done here?

Paquet: I would like for you to answer the question.

Toulouse: I don’t have to if I do not want.

Paquet: No, but we still have ten minutes left.

Toulouse: Then, I suppose we’ll just sit here.

…

Paquet: Lou, I would like you to take this—

Toulouse: Bipolar disorder? Severe depression? PTSD? You’ve got to be kidding.

Paquet: Just—read through the symptoms. I want you to circle or highlight the ones that you have. Can you do that?

Toulouse: And why should I?

Paquet: You want to feel normal, don’t you? This is how you start.

Toulouse: No, I want to be normal.

Paquet: You may never be normal. That is alri—

Toulouse: Don’t give me your stupid platitudes.

Paquet: It is alright, Lou, because you can manage your symptoms. Only if you get a proper diagnosis.

Toulouse: Have a good day, Doctor.

Paquet: À bientot.

[junker-town]

Isaiah Thomas's foolhardy attempt to stop LeBron James sums up the Eastern Conference Finals

The attempt by the Celtics star was admirable, but mistaken.

The Celtics went into Game 1 against the Cavaliers believing that they were the exception to the rule. Since no one gave them a chance in the two previous series they won, the same was possible against the Cavaliers.

“They didn’t give us a chance in this series,” Isaiah Thomas said after the Celtics won Game 7 against the Wizards. “They didn’t give us a chance when we were down 2-0 to Chicago. We got the No. 1 seed, they didn’t give us a chance. They don’t ever give us a chance. We just keep going. We don’t care about what others say.”

Here’s what happened in Game 1.

Bob DeChiara-USA TODAY Sports

Thomas’ bold attempt to block LeBron James looked like the scene in Wolf of Wall Street where Leonardo DiCaprio is crawling towards Margot Robbie and she shoves her heels in his face. Thomas summoned all the energy in his body, only to run into a brick wall.

Thomas prevented the and-1, which is commendable, but he almost lost his life in the ill-advised endeavor. James was Ant-Man in his giant form and Thomas was War Machine being smacked away.

It’s easy to call this brave, but I don’t think Thomas knew what bravery really is in these few seconds. Thomas has been underestimated his entire life and has developed a fearlessness because of that. That’s fine. This lack of fear is a huge reason why he’s become a superstar in a league dominated by people much taller and bigger than him.

But bravery isn’t the absence of fear. As Mufasa explained it to Simba, you don’t go looking for trouble. For basketball purposes, I’m going to change the characters in this conversation, replacing Simba with Thomas and Mufasa with Brad Stevens:

Stevens: Isaiah, I'm very disappointed in you.

Thomas: I know.

Stevens: You could have been killed! You deliberately disobeyed me! And what's worse, you put Kelly Olynyk in danger!

Thomas: I was just trying to be brave like you.

Stevens: Simba, I'm only brave when I have to be. Being brave doesn't mean you go looking for trouble.

Thomas: But you're not scared of anything.

Stevens: I was today.

Thomas: You were?

Stevens: Yes. I thought I might lose you.

Thomas: Whoah. I guess even coaches get scared, huh?

Stevens: Mmm-hmm.

You can even see Jaylen Brown give off the impression that he would contest the shot before deciding it was a bad idea. After his little leader was stiff-armed in mid-air by a giant, he slowly backed away from the scene of the crime. He knew there was blood on his hands:

IT4 went for the block http://pic.twitter.com/wZMO1Uvq5H

— NBA on ESPN (@ESPNNBA) May 18, 2017

Had Brown contested the shot, he could have saved Thomas from endless internet memes. He could have protected the face of the franchise from being treated like an insolent child. Whereas Thomas was foolish, Brown, in his cowardice, watched James do the basketball equivalent of reporting his friend as spam while whistling and walking away.

The other side of Thomas’ sacrifice was him trying to score on James.

The Eastern Conference Finals in one screencap http://pic.twitter.com/Jkh0zCgaph

— SB Nation GIF (@SBNationGIF) May 18, 2017

It’s time for us to be honest. The biggest sporting cliche is that nothing is impossible. It fits well with the lives of the athletes, who overcome great external obstacles to make it this far. Thomas, of course, has defied an even greater physical disadvantage to achieve greatness.

Because of this, we’ve decided that anything or anyone can be the exception to the rule. That’s how Thomas and the Celtics can say that since they’ve been doubted before, that they can beat James and the Cavaliers in the same manner they beat their other opponents.

No.

This world has laws. It has things that can happen and things that can’t. The Celtics were doubted against the Bulls and the Wizards because they often played bad enough to warrant the disbelief. People didn’t believe, not because they personally didn’t like the Celtics, but because the Celtics didn’t always inspire confidence. They were still the No. 1 seed, after all. No top seed can really be an underdog.

That delusion is not going to work against the Cavaliers. Unless Thomas receives divine assistance like David, Goliath will mush him over and over and knock his headband off until the message if clear.

There is no hope here.