#<- that’s like my story tag for this now LOOOOL

[wavetomuse]

Claire/Gray - about unrequited love…

[the-cult-of-russo]

Such a Softer Sin (Part 9)

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader

Warnings: I’m not specifically tagging this one, if you’ve seen the show, nothing will shock you. Smut will happen eventually so minors DNI, thanks.

A/N: I’ve really been enjoying all of your comments and it's been fun seeing all of the theories people have been coming up with looool

Thank you all for your super kind words about this story so far! I really appreciate the support.

—--------

You couldn’t tear your eyes away from the moon as you all waited for Billy to speak to the Goddess. You’d never seen anything like it, the moon wasn't supposed to wane before it even got full and the implications scared the crap out of you. You were gnawing your lower lip raw as you stared at it, Kos and Frank quietly talking among themselves. You heard the sound of the castle gates opening and your head whipped over. When they opened, you were surprised to see Atticus strolling inside the grounds. Alone. You felt a conflicting mix of relief, happiness and anger and you started storming right over.

“Well look who decided to grace us with his presence. Your mate not with you?” you asked snidely as you got close enough. He blinked at you for a moment, a little frown etching his brows and he seemed to tense up as he shook his head.

“She’s stayed behind for now, she’s dealing with some things,” he said simply.

“Like what?” you asked, raising a brow and he shifted on his feet, unable to look at you.

“It’s personal, it’s not my place to say,” he frowned and you scoffed a mirthless laugh.

“Right, of course not,” you muttered and his frown deepened.

“You know all about trauma, Y/N. You know what that shit’s like,” he murmured and the look on his face made your mouth clamp shut. You felt a little bad then. You didn’t know this girl at all, no idea what the hell she'd been through. Maybe she’d been through similar horrors to you and Atti, maybe that’s why she behaved the way she did. You felt a little bad at how you’d been behaving. Maybe if you had the chance to bond with her, this wouldn't happen. You hoped to be able to connect with her at some point to suss her out, to really get to know her. 

“I’ll be going back in a few days, I don’t really want to be away from her,” he said quietly, a sheepish look on his face. Your jaw ticked as you looked away at the news but you bit back your snarky response.

“I know I’ve been absent and I’m sorry. I want to divide my time between you all equally, it's just hard. Having a mate… it's more overwhelming than I thought it would be. I didn’t expect to feel like this. The love, it’s just… it's so much. A love that would make you do anything. It’s… It’s intense and I don’t know how to deal with it. I’m struggling,” he admitted a slightly panicked edge to his voice that had guilt ramming right through you like a sword. He looked completely and utterly lost and you suddenly found yourself feeling like the worst friend in the world for only thinking about yourself here.

“It’s okay, Atti. I won’t pretend to know what it’s like, but I can imagine it’s a lot to deal with. And I haven't exactly been the most understanding friend. I’ve just been scared to lose you,” you confessed and he reached out, taking your hand and the gesture was so comforting that it made your chest feel like it imploded.

“You won’t lose me, I promise. I’m just trying to adjust,” he murmured and you nodded. You were just glad to finally see him, to finally talk to him and clear the air between you. 

“Have you noticed anything?” you asked with a wry smile tugging at your lips and he looked at you confused.

“No, what”? He asked warily. You gestured with your hand to the moon and he looked up, blinking at it as a perplexed look washed all over him.

“Is it… is it smaller?” he asked slowly before he looked back to you.

“Seems like it. The King's just trying to contact the Goddess Selene to figure out what’s going on,” you shrugged and the pair of you shared a worried glance before you started making your way back over to Kos and Frank. Kos greeted Atti a lot more amicably than you had done and your eyes kept darting up to the moon as you wondered what Billy might find out. You looked over at Frank and he frowned, a look on his face that once again let you know he was being mindlinked.

“The King wants us in the meeting room,” he muttered, looking at the three of you before he turned and made his way up the steps. You all followed him and up to the meeting room just as Karen, Micro and Curtis were arriving too. You walked inside the room and Billy was at the head of the table pacing and it made a knot form in your stomach. He looked worried and that made you worried. You moved to sit down between Kos and Atti, the others taking the other side of the table, all of you looking to the King for answers.

“I can’t reach my mother,” he bit out worriedly and a deafening silence overtook the room.

“That’s… that’s never happened before, somethin’ ain’t right,” he added, his frantic and wide eyes flitting to you then to Frank as he shook his head. The news was even more worrisome and made you think something incredibly nefarious was going on, not just the moon being funky. 

“Could the vampires be behind this? I mean, if the moon never gets full then the wolves can’t turn. It would weaken us over time,” you frowned with dread. Not being able to shift for an extended period of time was dangerous and in some cases, even deadly if it went on long enough. 

“I agree with Y/N. This has the undead freak’s stink all over it and if they’re tryin’ to weaken us, then they’re already plannin’ somethin’,” Frank muttered tensely, his cagey eyes boring into Billy who wiped a hand over his face with a nod.

“But how could the vampires mess with the moon like that?” Micro asked in confusion.

“Is it possible they have witches on their side?” you asked as your eyes cut to Karen across from you. Her eyes widened for a moment before a deep frown creased her brows.

“I mean… Some witches would definitely have the power to pull something like this off, but the witches have no loyalty to the vampires and they respect the laws of nature. They’d never do something like this willingly,” she shook her head.

“What about unwillingly?” Frank asked as he gave his mate a pointed look. “They could have taken some against their will and be forcin’ ‘em to do magic,” he added gravely and Karen’s face paled, fear shining behind her eyes.

“I need to go and speak to some of my girls, see if we can figure out if this is magic related or not,” she stood up and rushed out the room and Frank watched her forlornly at how upset she seemed. 

“Frank, I need you and Curt to get the guards ready, some warriors too. I want ‘em stationed outside around the castle and at the outposts. Micro, you need to contact all the local pack leaders, take some warriors to each pack to keep ‘em safe and tell them what’s goin’ on,” Billy started firmly and the three men nodded before leaving to complete their tasks. 

“Kosmos, I need you and Atticus to take point with some of my men outside the castle. I know you guys can handle it, we’ll be doin’ it in shifts,” he ordered.

“Of course, Your Majesty,” Kos nodded as he and Atti both stood. Atti shot you a look before they left you were left sitting there alone. If you were honest, you felt a little put out that you hadn’t been given a job to do. You were more than capable of handling it and you didn't understand why you weren’t with Kos or Atti. The idea of him thinking you weren’t up to task prickled at you.

“Can I do anything?” you asked, trying to keep the edge from your voice as you watched him run a hand through his hair and mess it up. He glanced at you before his eyes quickly looked away, rolling his shoulder as he nodded.

“I need you for somethin’ important, actually. Come on,” he muttered. He looked like a tightly wound coil and you got up as you followed him out of the room. You had no idea what this supposed important job was but you were just happy to be helping in some way. 

He led you down the main stairs and through a door just near them. You’d never been in here before and you were surprised to find more stairs going down. Even more surprised that instead of some kind of basement, you were walking into what looked to be some kind of temple. Wall to ceiling was made of the brightest white marble you’d ever seen with a large white marble altar in the middle. There were two huge gold wolf statues against either side of the back wall with a gold statue of the Goddess herself taking center of them. You were in awe as your eyes soaked it all in, it was breathtaking. He gave you little time to really bask in the place before he was talking to you.

“I need to visit my mother… I’ve never done it before, there’s a ritual to do it and I couldn't… but I need to try now. I don’t even know if it’ll work, but I gotta try,” he frowned and you hated how lost he looked. 

“Okay… Why do you need me for the ritual?” you asked curiously. 

“I just trust you, okay? This is… it’s urgent, there’s a lot on the line here. We just need to get there and find out what’s goin’ on,” he muttered and you nodded, not wanting to upset him further. Then his words hit you.

“Wait… we? As in we both are going to see her?” you asked in surprise and he nodded jerkily. You could see he was still tense, his body was almost rigid and you decided not to push your luck here. You were surprised you would be going there, getting to see the Goddess yourself like that. You weren’t sure if it was breaking some kind of rules but Billy was asking you to do it, so you hoped it would be okay. You still weren’t sure why it had to be you. While you were touched that he’d trust you with something of this magnitude, you didn’t know why he’d picked you out of everyone. But you told yourself that his men were busy with their other tasks so you were the only one he trusted left without a job. You knew what was at stake here. Not only was the moon being weird but he couldn't contact the Goddess. Nothing good was happening and it needed to be fixed as soon as possible. If that meant you helping him with whatever this ritual was then you’d do it. 

“Okay, I’ll do it,” you said with a smile, trying to ease this awful tenseness he had going on. He smiled at you, looking somewhat relieved but it didn't seem to help too much as he frowned once more. He looked at you for a long moment, his dark eyes shining with something you really couldn't decipher.

“Just remember, this is a ritual, alright?” he said slowly, raising both his brows at you. It confused you as you blinked at him but you nodded, wondering what the hell it would entail. After one more look at you, he grabbed his dagger that was strapped on his belt and you were sure he probably carried it around with him everywhere. 

He stepped a little closer to you, taking a shaky breath and all you could do was wait for what was about to happen. You could only hope the ritual wouldn't be him sacrificing you. He took one of your hands in his and you were surprised to find it trembling in your own as he lifted it up a little. You winced as he sliced the blade across it and he shot you an apologetic look as the blood started to pool in the cut. He let go but you kept it there so you didn’t drip your blood all over his pristine floor as he did the same to his own hand. His eyes shot to your face then, almost sheepishly before he took your bloodied hand in his own, mixing the blood together. But then he pulled you closer to him by your hand and you bumped into his chest a little.

“Ritual, remember,” he whispered and you wondered how bad it had to be for him to keep reminding you. But you nodded and then he was capturing your lips with his own. You were startled, flashes of the other kiss bursting behind your eyes and you felt yourself tense. But you remembered what he’d said, that this was a ritual and you forced yourself to relax. His hand still clutched your own tightly as you kissed him back and while this wasn’t what you thought would happen, you knew kissing him wasn't the worst thing the ritual could have called for so you were grateful. Feeling you kissing back, his other hand moved to grip the back of your neck as he deepened the kiss and you found yourself melting into him, allowing yourself this one moment to give into the urges you’d been feeling as there was a reason for it. He moaned softly into the kiss and it sent a jolt right through you as his tongue tangled with yours and you felt like you might pass out. It felt like you were glowing from the inside out. He broke away and you felt a pang of disappointment as you both panted and he rested his forehead on yours. Your head was spinning, heart going a mile a minute as you tried to push past what just happened as it didn't mean anything.

“Did it work?” you asked softly, a slightly dazed tone to your voice. He was just staring at you and you felt like you were getting lost in his almost black eyes until he pulled away completely, his hand letting go of yours. Now able to breathe, you both looked around and you were startled to see you were no longer in the temple at the castle. You were standing in the middle of a large field, trees scattered about either side of it. The colors were so much brighter than you were used to though and it caught you off guard. The green grass was greener, the color of the flowers more brighter than you’d ever seen and the night sky didn't look black like it did back where you were from, it looked the deepest blue you’d ever seen. It was beautiful.

“Where do we go?” you asked as your eyes landed on everything you could find as you marveled at the beauty of it.

“No idea, I’ve never been here before,” he replied and when you glanced at him, he seemed just as awed as you did. 

“Maybe we should start there,” he suggested, pointing off into the distance and you followed his line of sight. He was pointing to what seemed to be a large stone temple, torches burning on either side of the stairs. It was a little distance away but you could still see it clearly. 

“Feels like a good place to start,” you agreed, shooting him a smile when he looked at you. His face brightened, a somewhat bashful smile on his face as he nodded and you set off walking. You were trying to keep your mind off the kiss you’d shared and you knew it would take a while to scrub it clean from your mind. The first time had been easy enough to get over, you hadn't kissed him back. It had been no more than his lips pressed against yours for a brief moment but this time it had been a full blown kiss. The kind that made your toes curl and set your body on fire.

“Have you never met your mother?” you asked curiously, trying desperately to keep your mind focused on something else. He gave you a small smile that seemed a little sad as he shook his head.

“No, I wasn’t raised by her. I’ve only ever been able to talk to her in the temple but it's in my head, kinda like a mindlink, I guess,” he explained and you nodded. You felt a little bad for him, hearing the mild hurt in his voice when he said he wasn't raised by her. You knew the circumstance between your upbringings were wildly different but you knew what it was like to have no parents, you knew what that pain felt like. You weren’t really sure what to say to that and a strange silence settled over you both. You weren’t sure if it was the kiss that was making things feel so stilted. He’d been adamant in reminding you that it was for the ritual but you could hardly blame him after the way you’d reacted the last time he’d kissed you. He probably felt uncomfortable because he thought you felt uncomfortable.

It didn’t take as long as you thought it might to reach the temple and the pair of you climbed the big steps up and walked inside. The first thing you noticed before anything else was that while this was a temple, it almost looked like a home on the inside. And there lay on the bed was the Goddess herself. She was the most beautiful woman you’d ever laid eyes on and your knees wobbled in reverence to her, but what stood out more than that was how sickly and pale she looked. You looked to Billy quickly who was standing stock still beside you. His breathing was labored, eyes wide as he stared at his mother and you could practically feel the pain radiating from him. The Goddess glanced over, a small gasp leaving her lips before a wide smile split her face and she rushed to get up. She almost fell and Billy snapped out of his stupor as he hurried over to her, catching her quickly and helping her stand. 

“Oh, William, my beautiful boy!” she beamed, looking up at him as she placed a small hand on his cheek. He gave her a watery smile, leaning into her touch as he gazed down at her. 

“Mom… what’s wrong?” he asked worriedly, his eyes scanning her as you hovered uncertainly. You weren’t sure if you wanted to be noticed or not, not sure if you were really supposed to be here and it felt like a very private moment. To witness the King meeting his mother for the very first time and in not so great circumstances. He guided her to sit on the bed as he lingered near her as if he was scared she might fall again. 

“It’s magic tampering with the moon. The vampires have been kidnapping witches and forcing them into using their magic,” she explained weakly and she wobbled a little, causing Billy to reach a hand out to steady her. He frowned deeply at the news and it made dread curl low in your stomach. It had been your own theory but part of you hoped there had been another explanation for it because this meant an escalation in the war. 

“You need to save the witches, William. Not only because it's endangering the wolves, but the magic the witches are being forced to perform is killing them and the vampires plan to go through as many witches as it takes to keep the magic going,” she insisted as she stood. She was still a little shaky on her feet but she managed to stand on her own this time as she looked at him imploringly. 

“They’re being held at an outpost in the Winding Forest. You need to save them,” she repeated firmly and he nodded.

She turned her gaze to you then and your breathing hitched. She started to slowly make her way over, Billy watching you both warily and you dropped to your knees, bowing your head quickly. You really couldn't believe you were in the presence of the Goddess herself. 

“You can stand, Child. You need not kneel for me,” she smiled warmly and you blinked up at her carefully, eyeing the hand she held out for you. You took it with a shy smile and let her help you to your feet. You were taken aback when she cupped both of your cheeks in her warm soft hands and you had no idea what to say as your wide eyes stared at her.

“You’re a beautiful and brave warrior, Y/N. You have a fierce yet kind heart,” she murmured and you almost felt like you couldn't breathe. Her kind words felt like they touched your soul and you couldn't get your mouth to work to tell her thank you. She gave you another warm smile then, her thumbs brushing your cheeks before she stepped away and Billy came over. 

“Can you… Can you reconnect her to her wolf?” he asked hesitantly and your head whipped to him in shock. You were surprised he’d asked such a thing, even if it was his mother. There were far more important things going on right now. You’d be a liar though if you said you weren’t touched by his request as you knew you’d never have the courage to do it yourself. The Goddess’s face fell then as she looked back to you for a long moment before she dragged her eyes back to her son.

“I can’t, William,” she frowned and Billy’s jaw tensed as he rolled his shoulder. You were caught off guard by the anger on his face.

“Why?” he bit out. He and his mother shared a look and you felt like you were missing something at the hurt all over his face. You didn't understand why he was so upset over this. Yes, you were disappointed but it was what it was. After staring at each other for a long moment, she turned her eyes back to you and she looked upon you with sympathy. 

“I can’t help, not yet. It will happen when the time is right,” she affirmed with a smile and you felt a spark of hope bloom in your chest. You felt so much relief at knowing it would happen one day, you’d started to think it would never happen. You’d gladly wait as long as it took if it meant it actually happened.

“Thank you,” you murmured, your voice wavering and small to your own ears.

“Everything happens for a reason, you should know that, William,” she said with a pointed look thrown his way. He still looked hurt and he rolled his shoulder once again with a curt nod. You still didn't understand his reaction, not when she’d just told you it would happen one day. 

“You should both go and save the witches,” she insisted, backing away a little and Billy stepped closer to her.

“Can we come back?” he asked, a desperate edge to his voice now his anger seemed to evaporate. She gave him a sad smile.

“One day. You're not really supposed to be here, so use the ritual sparingly. You need not come and check in on me, I’ll connect with you when it’s done,” she assured and Billy’s face fell. You felt the urge to comfort him at the sadness that seemed to blanket him.

“Is there anythin’ else we should know? Anything that could help with the war?” he asked her hopefully and she shook her head once again with a sad smile.

“I can’t. It would tamper with fate and it’s bad enough what I have told you. I shouldn't be getting involved but I fear what would happen if this keeps going,” she explained regretfully and Billy nodded. You felt awful then as you watched Billy share a tearful goodbye with his mother. You tried not to watch such a private moment but you’d been unable to help it as she held him and stroked his hair as they said goodbyes. You could see how much he loved his mother and now he was once again going to part with her and he couldn't just come back when he wanted. You knew he missed her, that he found it hard being away from her. You could only assume it would hurt more now he’d met her finally in person. Once they parted, Billy sniffled and wiped his damp cheeks, giving you a somewhat embarrassed look as he walked to the door. You gave the Goddess a smile but before you could leave, she walked over to you once more. You hadn't expected her to give you a parting hug too.

“You're stronger than you think you are and worthy of more than you could imagine,” she whispered to you. She pulled away then, giving you a bright smile before she moved back over to her bed. You blinked at her for a long moment, once again stunned by her words and the fact that the Goddess had been the one to say them to you.

“Goodbye, Goddess,” you murmured, bowing your head in respect before you hurried outside to where Billy was waiting anxiously. The only word you could use to describe the look on his face was devastated and it made your chest ache as you got to the bottom of the steps. He seemed to be trying to hold himself together, not a word leaving his lips as you took off walking. Without thinking, you reached out and took his hand and his head snapped to you, eyes wide with shock. You gave him a tentative smile, hoping it would give him even the smallest of comforts to ease what it was he was feeling and you felt relieved when he smiled back. 

“I want to go with you and your men to save the witches,” you said firmly after a while of walking hand in hand. He looked at you, licking his lower lip before nodding and you were glad he didn't argue with you on it. You wanted to help.

“The Vampire King won’t be there, he’d know we might come for him so it’s probably just gonna be some of his men, maybe some rogues,” he mused and you nodded in agreement. A very big part of you was itching for a fight and knowing the vampire assholes were using the witches the way they were, that they were killing them like they meant nothing, infuriated you. The Goddess had tasked you all with saving the witches and you took it personally. When you got to the clearing you’d arrived in, you both stopped and Billy let go of your hand and grabbed his dagger once more. You’d almost forgotten about the kiss with everything that had happened and you hadn't really thought about the fact you’d have to do it again to get back. 

“You ready?” he asked and you nodded with a smile. He still seemed sad and you were both eager to get back to relay the news to the others and get going with the plan. He once again cut your hand and then his own, holding them together. His other hand came up and cradled your face as his dark eyes flit over your face in question. You gave him a firm nod, ready for it this time and then he leaned down, his lips connecting with yours. It didn't get intense the way the other one had, no doubt the heaviness settling over you both. Instead, his lips were soft against yours as he kissed you almost delicately and you kissed him back. This time, you felt the ground shift beneath your feet and it startled you, making you break apart and look to the floor. You were once again in the temple under the castle. You looked up at Billy and found him already watching you. He gave you a little smile before he let go of your hand and stepped backwards. You hoped the kisses wouldn't make things too awkward after you’d gotten your friendship with him back on track. These kisses had a purpose though and they’d served the purpose well. 

“I’m gonna go update my men. Would you go and let Kosmos and Atticus know?” he asked.

“Yeah,” you nodded softly, giving him a reassuring smile. You both walked back up the temple steps and into the main castle before you parted ways. Your head was spinning and not just from the kisses you'd shared with the King. Knowing the vampires were indeed behind this and that they were using witch slaves left you reeling. You left the castle gates, letting your nose guide you to wear Kos and Atti were stationed and they both smiled when they saw you. They’d had no idea of the adventure you’d just had and you told them everything, except maybe about the kisses because you knew what Atti would say and now wasn’t the time. You explained what the Goddess said about the witches and the vampires and that you’d need to go and save them. 

“I’m coming too. No way I’m sitting this one out,” Kos said firmly, fire dancing behind his eyes and it made you happy to know that he would fight by your side. You’d save the witches and at least take out some of the Vampire King’s men in the process. 

“I need to leave. Aurora shouldn't be without me with everything that's happening right now,” Atticus frowned deeply, worry painting his face. He didn't even wait for a reply before he was off and you watched him leave with a frown. You'd expected him to agree with Kos, to tell you he’d be coming and fighting along with you as he always did. You hadn’t expected him to just go running away like this, backing down from a fight. The three of you were a force to be reckoned with out on the battlefield. You knew he was worried though and told yourself to let it go. She was his mate and things were really about to go to hell, of course he’d want to be with her, to make sure she was protected. You felt anticipation starting to thrum through you at the prospect of a fight, especially one against the vampires and rogues. You knew though that once you went to save the witches, that was it. Everyone knew a war was coming, you’d been on the cusp for a while, but this would be the catalyst for the war, the thing that started it all for real. This would set everything in motion and you knew things were about to get rough. You were ready for it though, even if you did end up dying in battle. You’d go out on a blaze of glory helping your pack and the King and you’d do it with a fucking smile on your face.

Taglist: (if you’ve been asked to be tagged and aren’t here, it wouldn’t let me tag some people.)

@firexfate

@blanchedelioncourt

@on-ya

@sunshinedaisies-anddeath

@snowkestrel

@music-indie-tv

@idaofinfinity

@sweetserendipity65

@ramadiiiisme

@k-marzolf

@celestialams

@woowwwee

@noortsshift

@rainbowgoblinfan

@mysweetlittledesire

@promnightbinbaby

@intothesoul

[imustbenuts]

Kiran is luck itself Part 2. Brief analysis of the absent mechanics in FEH.

If you’ve read part 1, welcome back. If not, here’s a brief ramble about the Luck stat in FE and its absence in FEH anyway. Stat mechanics ramble.

Luck stat in FE outside of FEH is actually a gainable stat when characters level up, but is not present in FEH. And neither is the Dex stat, but I’ll talk about this later. 

Overall, luck is… not really an important stat, but it kind of is, too. It doesn’t give a unit a tremendous consistent edge enough to fuss over it, but it does mess with 4 things significantly. These 4 things are:

Hit rate

Critical hit rate (Receiving and inflicting)

Avoid (magical evasion)

Dodge (physical evasion)

Luck also affects certain skill’s % to trigger such as Miracle and Armsthrift. 

An example from FE: Three Houses

According to fandom.com, luck in most games will increase both hit and evasion by 1 point, and reduce enemy crits by 1. But if one looks closely at how the formulas work, stats like Atk/Mag/Spd are far more important in determining the ceiling of how hard a unit can hit, which thus determines how viable they can be in a playthrough. Having a high luck character with meh stats isn't great since they tend to fall behind a lot due to inconsistent RNG, or unreliability.

So overall Luck can be overall summed up as the most useless-useful stat. It's just… better to be there and not be abysmally low, basically.

Another important stat for this topic is the Dex stat. This stat affects hit rate and crits chance. This stat is named 技 (waza, Skill) in JP, which is very apt. No matter how lucky a person is, if they can’t even draw their bow they are not going to get very far.

So. That’s like 250 words to explain 2 stats which doesn’t exist in FEH. And I think I’m being Captain Obvious here, but that’s because… Having dex and luck is going to add a layer of complexity that ultimately wastes the player’s time for what amounts to a F2P predatory gacha game.

….

Oh wait that’s not it. Wrong script. (Who says that when they’re over analyzing a F2P gacha game anyway, looool)

I mean, for my analysis about Kiran’s luck, their luck here is clocking so high that things like hit rates, dodging, crits, and skill procs become consistent rather than random RNG. It's overwritten all units' luck. It’s so high that, while having proficiency and skill in the use of a weapon is ideal, it’s not critical for survival under the OoH’s banner. It’s so high that heroes can feasibly walk into a battlefield in swimsuits and floaties and yet beat the shit out of enemies and walk away with a ‘teehee’. 

It’s so high that the game doesn’t even bother with logging the stats for our use. That skills which might only proc once in someone’s playthrough can now be consistently proc’d in 4 hits. Or less with skills.

But that luck still has its limits. 0 damage is still 0 damage and no luck can salvage that. 

I think this is why the writing in FEH gives the braincells to Alfonse and not Kiran. Rather than the tactician going "let's go to the ancient temple for a mcguffin", it's the lord, Alfonse who does it. Kiran tags along like 3 lucky cats in a trenchcoat in stories, and seem to rarely do anything by themself, which may imply that they’re keeping their head low which helps hold back the effects of that luck. (And subsequently limit the fate breaking aspect of it all)

(There’s also a common Japanese saying of, “the nail that sticks out gets hammered down”, so there’s some degree of characterization possibly going on in the main story here, but that’s not the point of this analysis.)

In my part 1, I gave a very very brief overview about their luck being present in the story, but those points aren’t the entirety of it. I left out a lot of stuff to not inflate the words. I hope people apply this theory for funsies and see how deep this could potentially go. Bc it really goes.

Anway, that’s all for now. Thanks for reading!

[heytheredeann]

20 questions for fic writers

I was tagged by @cha-melodius, thank you! <3<3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

439! The plan is posting two more tonight so hopefull that will soon be 441 LOL.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

939,623! Almost a million yay!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

At the moment mostly TMFU, I have been getting into writing Banana Fish fic too, and I write for The Witcher, though less frequently than TMFU.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Stretch (Buck/Eddie+Christopher, 911, 3x02 AU)

Everywhere I'm looking now, I'm surrounded by your embrace (Harvey/Mike, Suits, soulmates AU)

I held your hand as you shook in the middle of the night (Geralt/Jaskier, The Witcher, 1x06 fix-it)

Leave it unspoken (Harvey/Mike, Suits, a serial killer on the loose AU looool I had forgotten about this one)

Concession (Geralt/Jaskier, The Witcher, Geralt likes being the little spoon fic)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yesssss, I'm like constantly behind and sometimes I answer months late, but I love answering because 1) comments make me so happy and I want the readers who took the time to let me know they enjoyed the fic to KNOW THAT, 2) talking about fics is SO much fun, I think that discussing things in the comments is the best part of posting.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

LOOOOOOOOOOOL filter for MCD on my Ao3 and take your pick. But I'd go with either Forever is the sweetest con (Napoleon/Illya/Gaby, TMFU) because the story is told backwards, so you start with post-MCD and end pre-MCD, so the ending is happy but. well. the happiness is gone already and you know it LOL, or maybe Meaner than my demons, colder than this home (Napoleon/Illya/Gaby, TMFU), purely because generally speaking when I play with MCD I kill just one of them off and leave the other two to pick up the pieces, but here there's just Napoleon left, so. probably worse than the others LOL.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Sooo, I tend to write one-shots, and I HAVE written fluffy fics, but I think I'll go with Something gets lost from a safe distance (Napoleon/Illya, TMFU) because it's part of a three-part series that's all emotional hurt/comfort, and then it ends with fluffy kissing so.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Eh, it has happened, I think it's inevitable if you have been doing this for long enough LOL.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Nope.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Not usually, I did write a TMFU/Supernatural crossover though LOL.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I’m aware of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yesss, more than once and it's always extremely flattering that someone would want to go through all that effort <3

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Right now I feel particularly strongly about the TMFU OT3 but like. I love so many.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I HAVE MULTIPLE LONGFICS SITTING IN MY DRAFTS DAMMIT. I just never want to post longfics unless I have either a first draft for every chapter or at the very least an extremely detailed outline for every chapter, which means that I end up always posting one-shots LOL. Two notable mentions among these longfics are a "Napoleon gets amnesia and bullshits his way through it to avoid telling anyone because he has trust issues" fic and an AU with Illya as a ghost that's a whole angsty mess. help me.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Eeeeeeeh the emotions I'd say. Or I HOPE so, since that's pretty much 80% of my writing loooool Also there a lot of lines of dialogue that I come up with that I unironically like.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Plots for one, I just tend to write snapshots with no real plot most of the time, and action. I don't LIKE writing it, which means I can never tell if it's boring or if I'm just projecting, and I tend to avoid it. ...also romance/attraction/getting-together. My aroace ass never knows what is believable romance and what are just tv show tropes that are not actually real LOL.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I generally don't do it and keep to the language of the narration, just clarifying "X says in German" if there's a change of language. I write limited third POV, so I just see it as "filtering" everything through the lens of the person that we are seeing the perspective of. If I'm writing from Gaby's POV, for instance (she's German but fluent in English), I feel like TECHNICALLY the narration should be in German, so by writing in English I have already chosen a filter that is not 100% accurate. But that's the filter I'm going with, so English is the language that Gaby is communicating to the reader in, so everything should be communicated through English lens: if she's talking to someone in English, I will just write the lines with no specifications, if she's talking in German I still write in English and write "in German" in the narration, and if someone speaks a language she doesn't know I don't write the actual dialogue because she doesn't understand it, so the reader doesn't get to see it either.

I hope this makes some sort of sense LOOOOOL, I don't really mind any way I've seen this done, but this is how I prefer to go about it.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

The Fallen book series. LOL.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Evil question, go directly to jail, do not collect 100$. This answer will absolutely change every five minutes, but right now I'm particularly feeling Souvenir from a life left behind (Napoleon/Illya, TMFU), just a tiny dissolution of UNCLE fic with Napoleon angsting.

.

Tagging: @imgoingtofreakoutnow @ikeepwatchinghelicopters @thetamehistorian @huggiebird @deducitetemporacarmen @set-phasers-to-whump @cherryjuicegf @geralt-of-vengerberg and anyone else who hasn't done this yet and wants to play <3

[voidcat-senket]

20 questions for fic writers

Tagged by @hxhhasmysoul and @subdee!! <3 <3 <3 who are both v lovely go like. look at their blogs. anyway

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

.161

2. What’s your total ao3 word count?

520,484 - 27% of that is one fic looool

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Right now just HxH and SW:Fallen Order series. Sherlock and Star Trek AOS were big ones too

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Closing the Space (Between Us) - again its 27% of my wordcount! It deserves it! the Hunter x Hunter Killugon Reunion fic of my dreams. I am SO PROUD of this one I have handed it to irl friends! On purpose! My partner got me a physical copy for Xmas 2021!

2. Crying Over Yuuri - a Kyou Kara Maou! fic, which is a fandom I am amazed is still being read. It's a Wolfram POV fic where he, you got it, cries over Yuuri. Pretty fluffy ending. I credit the numbers to the fact that not a lot of fic gets written for KKM anymore so it doesn't disappear under all the new stuff

3. Not Unusual - A ST:AO3 Academy Era McKirk. Bones gets a bunch of clues to something going on with Jim... he gets it a little wrong, Jim freaks out because this man has Issues, but it resolves in the end. I wrote this one as a pinch-hit for an exchange back when I was still RPing Jim Kirk @thewinningscenario

4. 5+1: Are They Or Aren't They? - Somehow my Mystrade (Sherlock BBC) still gets hits with fair regularity and I'll never understand why. It's definitely not my best work but it's cute! 5 times people weren't sure if Mycroft and Lestrade are dating, and the time they know (because they receive a wedding invitation!!)

5. One Flew East, One Flew West - a Killugon Modern AU in which Killua and Gon meet at a Psychiatric Recovery Center, with Kurapika as another patient and Leorio as a therapist. written for HxHBB2020. I'm very fond of this one. It makes me cry <3 I'm so happy there's so much fandom diversity in these! (The next 11 are all either HxH or Sherlock, l o l )

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I wish I could say I did! I mean to! Sometimes I am not in a good place so I mean to do it later and then I forget..... whoof. I am so thankful for each and every review, and I want to repay that!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I wrote a LOT of fics in my teens where people died (not all of them are on A03, it didn't exist at the time. I'm not giving you my ff.net ;) ) Surely, one of them! More recently, I wrote a Dragon Age: Inquisition Lavellan/Dorian in response to Dorian preemptively breaking up with me (rude!) that is Pretty Hecking Angsty. It's tagged "hurt no comfort"

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Closing the Space (Between Us) did so much work to get where it was, and they ended up with Everything! My boys <3 (And Alluka)

8. Do you get hate on fic?

Very rarely! I'm pretty lucky in life that I don't get hate generally. Maybe it's because I'm not Out There enough but- who cares! People are nice and sweet and lovely mostly, and I love writing fanfic for/with them :3

9. Do you write smut?

Sometimes it will appear in other fics. I don't really do PWPs, and smut itself is pretty rare because I don't include it unless it's... necessary? Kinda? Like if the story demands it. I personally only read smut in certain moods, so when smut's included I make it easy to skip, but it certainly exists

10. Do you write crossovers?

It depends! In my Sherlock days I had a Sherlock/Stargate Atlantis crossover series and a Sherlock in the HP universe series, but I haven't done any recently.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of! I heard people copy fics over to Wattpad sometimes but I've never looked. I'm not usually in MegaFandoms anyway, so I don't think I'm in any real danger.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

YES!! A few different Sherlock ones! (I guess I was pretty well known in the Mystrade sphere?? IDK that was back on livejournal. Anyone else miss KinkMemes?) I think one got translated to Russian and one to Chinese. Both reached out to me and asked for permission first, which I of course granted! It's very flattering <3

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Way way way back in my teen years I cowrote a few times- one in YuGiOh and one in Fruits Basket with a high school friend. Recently I am technically cowriting a fic with @spyscrapper atm- I say technically because its really an rp l o l (Star Wars: Jedi Survivor Canon Divergent Spyscrapper, it's pretty hecking cool! And painful! :D ) I once cowrote a fic where the other author just like. eliminated my plotline. so. It's not always good, but it's still fun to try!

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

I refuse to pick One. Killugon (HxH), McShep (Stargate Atlantis), Seishirou/Subaru (Tokyo Babylon & X/1999) and any combination of McSpirk (Star Trek) have probably had the most long-lasting impact on me. And

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but probably won’t?

I often feel like I should finish Pulling The Trigger because it's an interesting casefic and I like the thought of a mystery, but... it's 12 years old at this point, so...

16. What are your writing strengths?

Nature-themed metaphors and descriptions! And I feel like I have pretty strong character points of view! Oh, and angst. I'm good at angst. >:)

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Planning 🙃 oops what's that. And I use adverbs too much! (but it's fun so I'll keep doing it)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

It depends why! If a fic is from the POV of Character A and Character B is talking in a language they don't understand, for example, it's fine to use it (though please provide a translation for your reader!) The language switch has to be for a specific reason, and if the character understands it the reader should too. (In One Flew, Gon and Killua sometimes swap to Japanese to disguise their conversations from everyone else- I show that by changing their conversation to italics in most cases.) I definitely wrote a fic as a teen that had all Japanese because I was a weeb and... lol don't do that.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Yugioh, 2001!! It was probably two paragraphs long hahaha

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

Closing the Space (Between Us) for sure! God it's so good. I am begging people to read it. If you're going to read One Thing I have written in my entire life-so-far, please let it be that!!

"Tag 20 people:" that seems like a lot hahaha uuhh @spyscrapper @avtorsola @mmuffncakes @nightingalesighs @etoiline @iwishtocountthestars @unicorncoalition @shalnarkonice @missinkylace @thefledglingdm 10 is a reasonable number. but tbh if you wanna do it, do it, I wanna read ur response!

[onigiri-dorkk]

#onigirihusband reads SMUT for the first time!!

Omg today was such a busy day but I'm finally gonna sit down and let y'all know how my husband reacted to the Rivamika SMUT of Chapter 15!!

HAHA it has been long awaited and, mind you, my husband did not even KNOW what smut was, or that the concept of descriptively writing sex scenes in a sensory way was a thing LOL. (My story was tagged 'eventual smut' this whole time; he's read the tags but it went over his head bc that's literally how much he didn't know what Smut was LOL)

A big takeaway though? I think he actually ships Rivamika now officially 😂

Before he read, I gave him a heads up that everything I wrote was for the story, was for my audience, and to make things believable. He had a shocked af face and was like WHAT DOES THAT MEAN???? IS THERE A SEX SCENE??? In my head I was like oh honey.... it's not just sex, it's pure smut LOL

"WHAT IS IT? WHAT AM I ABOUT TO READ????"

I said "NO MATTER WHAT JUST KNOW I'M YOUR WIFE AND YOU'RE STUCK WITH ME"

"You don't have to read the full thing if you don't want to" "NO I'M READING ALL OF IT"

He began reading and had a huge grin on his face for minutes LMAO. He told me to stop looking at him cuz we kept laughing and he was getting too distracted

I watched him for any facial expressions for when he starts getting at the spicy parts (nakey Mika in the bathroom), to the escalation of the smut, but he knew I was watching his face so he threw a blanket over his face LOOOOL (eventually threw it off and said he was too hot)

I couldn't tell what part he was on (he's a slow reader too, so it was hard to guess) -- I kept thinking he hadn't reached the smut or anything yet....

Until he lowered his phone into his chest and said, "SPICY. THAT WAS SO SPICY." BAHHAHAHAH I was laughing SO hard and LITERALLY all he kept saying was SPICY SPICY SPICY. He said he was shocked, but impressed at how descriptive it was

I lol'd at the vein in his forehead protruding HAHAHHAHA I think it raised his blood pressure

We then talked about smut in general -- I told him it's a thing for some writers, and a lot of readers enjoy and want that in romances, so I delivered LOL. I asked him if he knew what smut was, and I was right that he did not know or expect it to exist, let alone me writing it (he knew there would be some sort of sex scene, he was just surprised at how detailed it was)

But he seemed to actually genuinely appreciate it!!! Like he said he's impressed at how I was able to write it and said he could see everything in detail LOL (he said EVERYTHING)

I said "but you see how it was for the story? their physical intimacy is symbolic of their emotional intimacy, and Levi being afraid of engaging in that with her is a sign of him being afraid of fully engaging emotionally too--" then he interrupted and said "no it was just because you wanted them to have sex" and I said "I MEAN YES BUT--" HAHAH

He pointed out Mikasa's "supple breasts" and it's now an inside joke we keep repeating now LOL

"So like... he finished... inside of her?? Are they gonna have a baby now?" LOOOOL

HE SAID "tell your Tumblr/twitter people that that was the most shocking part of it to me" LOOOL

"But realistically, I know they're exhausted from the Zeke scenes, but with their super strength and their muscles and all, they would probably actually have really amazing sex" (this is actually fun for him to say because I think it's the first thing he organically said that implies that he can finally see and feel Levi and Mikasa's chemistry)

HE SAID "....a lot of what you wrote between them sounded... familiar" LOOOOOOL I said well you have to write from experience right HAHAHHAHAHA shhhh

Then he went on to say "but now all your readers just read it and doesn't that give a lot of umm, insight" but I said it's not like that; that readers know that writers can and will write from even outside of their experience and that's the art of it.

So I think I successfully wrote it in a way where he um, put himself in the perspective because he was really comparing us BAHAAHHAH I guess that's a good thing right?!?! HAHAHA

He said "WHEN DID YOU EVEN WRITE THIS???" and I explained it's like in free time, etc. and he laughed so hard imagining me writing this stuff at Starbucks LOOOOOL I told him that's when I take the back corner seat so no one sees my laptop

I was dying though bc usually after the chapter he'll point out things from all throughout the chapter, but for this he couldn't stop talking about the smut

so I kinda teased and tried asking him what he remembers from the other parts of the chapter and he was FLUSTERED trying to remember non-smut things HAHA. He did, however, say he liked the "singing part" :') And that it revealed Mikasa had feelings for him all along

He also caught my Perks of Being a Wallflower reference in their dialogue, which was sweet because Perks is a very special story/movie to both of us

ALSO he said "you should draw fanart of that" as a joke AND I ALMOST BUST OUT LAUGHING because little does he know I already drew two NSFW Rivamika pieces but iono if I wanna show him HAHAHHAHA

All in all I'm thankful he read it, actually enjoyed it, didn't discourage me or treat me like I was weird, etc. He had great supportive reactions to it and it feels like a huge weight lifted off of my shoulder getting to be TOTALLY transparent with him. #onigirihusband passes the test!

There are other funny things that happened but I won't write about that LOOOL if you're curious I will vaguely and appropriately tell you through message BUT IT IS GOLD AND THE BIGGEST SIGN THAT HE ENJOYED HAHAHHHAHA

[staticl0ve]

FURIOUS that I’m late but. here✨✨✨

✨What's a fic you've posted you wish you could breathe life into again and have people talking about it? (or simply a fic you wish got more credit)

🌿how does creating make you feel?

🎈describe your style as a writer; is it fixed? does it change?

💞what's the most important part of a story for you? the plot, the characters, the worldbuilding, the technical stuff (grammar etc), the figurative language?

🍭why did you start writing?

kissing your glorious face and brain😌

I see your gesture and I raise you: licking your face and brain ✨👅✨

-

✨What's a fic you've posted you wish you could breathe life into again and have people talking about it? (or simply a fic you wish got more credit)

I’m realizing I skimmed this question so I’ll give you two answers cause I have this whole chunk typed out looool.

Oh my god, if I wouldn’t find it so tedious, maybe edit the first fic I ever wrote, Ex Animo. It’s sort of a half a retelling of the original plot and half self indulgence and I really meant for there to be this super dark and wicked crime mystery, very body snatcher and political within DBH post revolution, but I honestly fell out of love writing it cause I wanted to move on from it.

-

OKAY. Back on track:

Darkest of Hearts is a Nines/Reader and he’s just soaked in blood, she’s soaked in blood, they make out and it’s hot. It doesn’t have as much interest and it may be due to how many “omg there’s blood” tags. (It’s not even that bad but juuuust in case).

It was my first attempt at present tense too, so it’s a bit rocky in some scenes but I really liked the imagery of these two secret agents and the dark romance they have with each other.

🌿how does creating make you feel?

So good, heheh. It’s a great outlet. I’m always kinda thinking of ideas and it’s so fun having a place to write them down and even better if someone enjoys it.

🎈describe your style as a writer; is it fixed? does it change?

Overtime, my style’s changed a lot. I started off with a very reader POV focused style. Now though, how I tell a story varies depending on what I’d like to tell. The voice in Dollhouse is eerie and I try to add lots of suspense and tension in contrast to any of the TNDB stories where it’s just sunshine and bubblegum.

Overall, I think how I try to dig into a character has a bit of a recognizable pattern. In a good way, though! I can tell when I’m writing something that’s meant to be introspective for a character and that the pacing of their self discovery follows a similar beat to some of my other stories. Like we’ve hit an emotional plateau, cut to more action, k now more emotions.

💞what's the most important part of a story for you? the plot, the characters, the worldbuilding, the technical stuff (grammar etc), the figurative language

I love this question so much. It’s the smut. It’s always the smut.

Jk, but also not.

I enjoy good plot, which I think goes hand in hand with some world building (context for the plot). But I also just really adore character explorations, putting them in highly emotional circumstances and seeing how they can mirror our humanity.

🍭why did you start writing?

To be honest? Originally, just cause I really wanted to read the scenarios I was bugging other writers about and then the secondhand embarrassment of sending them so many prompts had me going: oh fine, I can try and see how it goes. 🤣💀

Now? I’m just so stoked to have a chance to put some ideas I have on paper cause I’m always imagining things and it used to go nowhere so now it can at least live somewhere in the internet ✨

-

Ty babe 💋💋✨

Ask me anything from this writer ask.

[madmadmilk]

#madreads | stuff i’ve been reading lately 👀

heyyo i’m just making a list of books i’ve been reading lately IRL. most are just swishy, feel-good, HEA romance stuff. I’ll update it periodically~ ✌🏼💛✨ enjoy, and feel free to recommend! 

“The Flat Share” by Beth O’Leary: sharing a flat with someone you’ve never met? Tiff needs a cheep & easy place to stay, and Leon works nights and needs the $$. Leon takes the bed in the day, Tiff at night.... they’re bound to meet sometime, right?

“The Hating Game” by Sally Thorne: easy-peasy office, enemies-to-lovers. Lucy and Josh share an office for 40 hours a week, PAs for a recently merged companies. constantly one-upping each other, and playing ‘games’ in vengeful silence with arbitrary, made-up rules–– but lucy will never let josh win. especially when there’s a promotion at stake. if she wins, she’ll be josh’s boss, and if she loses... she’ll resign. 

“Beach Read” by Emily Henry: Augustus is an acclaimed author of literary fiction, and january writes best selling romance. they’re opposites in every way.... right now the only thing they have in common is they’re neighbors and both struggling with writer’s block. they make a bet, augustus will write a bright happy romance while january tackles the “next Great American Novel.” of course they’ll take field trips of rom-com montage fame, and he’ll take her to interview backwoods death cult members (???) and absolutely no one will fall in love, lmao.

“Man Crush Monday” (and Stand-In Saturday) by Kristy Moseley. bruhh..... just read it. amy clark is a happy, peppy girl who works on the train... every monday her crush comes aboard, handsome and dorky. lool one day, they meet off the train, and love blossoms from there......

“The Billionaire’s Wake-Up-Call Girl” (and the entire series tbh) by Annika Martin: bruhh lol ya girl works at a company and tries to stay on her best behavior. so when she can’t find a “morning call service” to wake up her boss..... she takes it upon herself to make the call. so yeah, obviously she is the sweetest person ever at 4:30 AM–– oop. and soon enough, boss man is tearing down the city to find her.

“Come Back to Bed” by Kayley Loring: a grumpy lawyer dude moves in next door to an artist, and the only thing she can be sure of is that he’s hot hot hot and has the cutest lil dog ever. when they first meet, he recognizes her long-time and flailing crush on her artist boss..... sparks fly from there lmao

“Happy-Go-Lucky” by L.H. Cosway. Maisie works as a researching for a PI firm, and is nothing but kind to every one there. lol then at the christmas party, intimidating cameron grant shows up and out of the kindness of her heart, she sits by to talk to him. looool he tells her he despises everyone’s behavior at their workplace even her’s to a degree–- be deems her most tolerable. lol even jabbed, her lil office crush on him doesn’t waver. things become even more awkward when he takes her home.............

“Would Like to Meet” by Rachel Winters. evie has been a an assistant for 7 years, hanging on a thread for a promotion. too bad her job is in the hands of breakout-director ezra, for hollywood’s next rom com. lol but he’s suffering from writers block. in order not to lose her job, she collects data and stories from going on “meet-cute” dates and scenarios to “inspire” ezra lol and maybe find herself a real date along the way?

“The Unhoneymooners” by Christina Lauren. olive is ur typical unlucky gal–– constantly outdone by her perfect twin sister, who she still loves and adores. so ofc, on her sister’s wedding day she is paired with her worst enemy, ethan (who happens to be the best man). just 24 hours to get through, and things will be back to normal. lol too bad that everyone at the wedding gets food poisoning, leaving olive and ethan the only people unscathed. her sister refuses to let her honeymoon package go to waste so... she encourages olive and ethan to go... together. looool

And that’s all i can think of for right now!!! i haven’t been reading anything too serious, i just want these fluffy chick lit HEA romances to get me through the rest of the year.... like... just give me some serotonin pls. alright and lemme just say... getting a kindle (and kindle unlimited bleh) has changed my reading life.... it’s so much easier now lol 🥺💛✨

if you have any recommendations or notes to add, feel free to let us know! happy reading!!!!!!!!!!!!! ❣️

tagging: @rae-gar-targaryen​ and @ that one anon that asked hahaha

[dreamcatcherjiah]

writer’s ask game

HI 🙈🙈🙈 I was tagged by the lovely @alpacaparkaseok to answer some questions! thank you so much for tagging me, even if I am getting to this after days xD

which new trope would you like to try writing?

Namjoon!Professor au is living rent free in my mind right now, so (maybe take it as a warning :P) I would like to try my hand at it!

which trope do you want to write again?

Thanks to B, I am obsessed with soulmate aus now, and I have so many ideas for each member, my mind (and my notes app) are literally overflowing, so as soon as I have time, I plan to get to it hahaha

which draft are you most excited to post?

OOOOOFFFFF *sweats profusely* I,,, would say any of them, but I am pretty hyped for a namjoon + OT6 fluffy piece I’ve had unfinished for months lmao (yeah, I am a pro procrastinator and I write under pressure, meaning exam season, so I haven’t touched it since June last year lmaon’t)

is there any new genre you want to explore?

I really liked writing historical fiction for my JK au, so I would like to go back to it again, since I haven’t written much with it

do you have any favorite lines in any of your drafts up to now?

This is from an unnamed story (angsty, of course, who am I trying to kid?) so do with that as you will hahahaha

“Do not mistake me for the sentimental type. The day you walked out of my life was the day you died to me. I am no medium, so excuse me if I don’t vibe with the whole talking to the deceased trend.”

have you decided on any creative goals for 2021?

Become,,, creative,,, again,,,? LOOOOL

describe your journey on this blog last year in three words! and three more words for what you hope for 2021:

2020: amazing and rewarding

2021: a new beginning 

I’m gonna tag my friends @bangtan-madi @mabel-k3 and @minsugapie if you guys want to do it ♥️♥️♥️

[silver-wield]

Hi this is not Cloti related but do you have an analysis on Cloud's relationship with Jessie? Particularly during chapter 4 after the bike mini-game? Cloud looks worried

Sorry this took a while, Nonny, I get a bit done in from life lol

So Cloud and Jessie, the girl who absolutely has no issue throwing herself at our boi. It's pretty good for him because at least he gets used to girls being all over him and helps him make his mind up just who he wants to show attention to #cough# Tifa #cough#

Ok, spoiler warning for ppl who haven’t played – do I still need to do this? Eh ok, (I tag FF7R spoilers as final fantasy 7 remake spoilers) and it’s gonna be smol.

Also, this is one person’s interpretation of the scene, so if you disagree that’s cool and we’ll agree to disagree.

You’re also gonna have to excuse the janky quality on some of the screens, I’m grabbing them from Youtube and it’s frustrating af trying to get the exact moment I want.

Please check my master post to see if I've already covered your question, thanx

Let's mosey!

Recap time!

Chapter four and our reluctant hero has been roped into help the avalanche trio go topside. Problem is they missed the last train and have to take their bikes instead. Cue a few problems with security and a meeting with the master of extra, Roche. Once that's out of the way, Jessie rewards Cloud depending on your expertise.

This scene has 3 optional endings.

Quick aside, I find it hilarious that Cloud literally tells Jessie to shut up and get off the bike when she starts annoying him during the minigame.

Ok, ending one. The bad ending where Jessie's beyond disappointed with you. These are hard to pick apart because a lot of Cloud's attention is on the road, so the usual microexpressions are even harder to catch.

But look what I caught anyway! Check that brow quirking like “excuse you?” and it's accurate because he says he's a great driver in the next moment. I really love going over these scenes and spotting all these because they build such a clearer picture of Cloud is as a person. And clearly boi doesn't like his driving ability being questioned, especially seeing how Jessie didn't do squat to help him, aside from being annoying lol

Well, Cloud does seem a bit worried here if the frown is anything to go by. I'm guessing it's because this is the bad ending and as much as he's not into Jessie, he doesn't like people having a bad impression of him. He doesn't like the idea that he's not thought of as the big badass capable merc in all ways, so this could well be hints of that self-doubt coming through. 

Although, after watching the other two endings, this is the only time we see this typical cycle of expressions he does before concluding something. This is what I like to call a real!Cloud inner debate. Cloud often goes through a lot of quick expressions or his eyes dart around. Since they can’t do that here, we get the former. Judging from the frown at the end, he’s not impressed with his own performance and likely berating himself for not being good enough. Again. Someone call a therapist for Cloud, plz.

And moving onto the second ending, which you get if you did ok on the minigame. These are making me wonder which one's canon. I don't think it's the kiss and actually, it may well be the bad one since that's where we get the most facial expression and close ups from Cloud compared to the others where we see the back of his head or a mid range view.

For this scene we only get one close up of Cloud's face and it's pretty much SOLDIER!Cloud and then the next time he speaks you can't even see his face. This is the kind of thing that hints to me which optional scene is the one we're supposed to be getting for Cloud's narrative story (and that I actually forgot about for my playthrough as Cloud lol I got the middle one because I kinda suck at fighting Roche, but I try).

Yeah, so a lot of sighing from Cloud at Jessie, the annoyed kind. I mean, we know she kinda irritates him, but he likes her too, just not in a romantic way. You also don't see his reaction to her “I might be falling after all” line and only hear him say “hmm?” Then when his face is next in frame it's full on SOLDIER, so there's really nothing to pick apart.

And now the good ending where you get a kiss from Jessie! Ooh lala!!

CLOUD'S FACE HERE! OMG I'M DYING! He's such a boi in a man sometimes! Adorable af! Definitely never even had a kiss on the cheek before in his life and look at the ott reaction to it!

WAIT! Wait! I've seen that face before somewhere!

YES OMG I'M DYING! It's the same reaction as the one to Aerith's best dress! OMG!

I'm sorry, I genuinely need a minute....

Ok, so...looool ok....I can be sensible here....maybe loool erm, the unrealistic expression on Cloud's face shows that it's unlikely this is the outcome that happened. But, on the other hand if the red dress happened then so did this kiss, so choose your poison lol

omg I love the devs for this! I really do! This is hilarious! I can’t even look at these two pics without laughing!

Ok, sensible. Kinda. 

And last one where Cloud looks grim af as usual, but with a hint of “what do I do about this?” because Jessie kissed him and he's not interested and he has no clue what to do with women and likely wants to reject her, but still doesn't know what to do with women, so you can see the dilemma he's in lol

It doesn't help when Jessie tries calling him out on it and he has this tiny frown in response. His attention is split between trying to talk to her and driving, so it's no wonder he's not that talkative and abrupt. If I wanted to speculate I'd say if he actually had an interest in her as more than friends he'd have tried harder. He had his little chat with Marle already, so he's not opposed to putting himself out if he wants to. He doesn't here, but he's still trying to concentrate, so that could explain the lack of attention, but still, Jessie kissed him and he got scowly.

Conclusion.

Well, I for one didn't remember there were 3 of these endings – each with their own remix of Jessie's theme, just like another 3 optional scenes with a remixed theme lol the parallels are killing me!

The music for each should also hint at which one is the narrative canon – I'm useless with music analysis so bear with me. The first one does sound like it fits with the other girls' themes, so very simple, easy to listen to in the background and memorable in its way. The second is louder and has more techno notes in, making it seem less like a background piece and more in your face. The last one has vocalists and is a full on pop song! No way is that right lol

For two of the three of these we don't really get much in the way of Cloud's face. It could be put down to him driving, but we get a couple of very good close ups on the bad one with varied expressions, one of which definitely goes towards his personal motivation to be thought of as a hero. Having people point out his faults would cause that kind of reaction.

The second result really doesn't have much in the way of facial expression and Cloud's voice is brisk because he's driving, so I can't really say much about it one way or the other. It’s the one I get the most when I’m playing and it’s kinda blah. Like your standard minigame pass screen. That probably didn’t help.

The last one is hilarious! That's such an exaggerated expression! Do people really believe Cloud pulls that kind of pikachu face on the regular?! I legit needed to stop because I couldn't stop laughing! That's not Cloud or real!Cloud, that's just bloody funny! Also, Cloud doesn't seem too impressed by the result if that last minute frown is any indication. He doesn't want Jessie kissing him, even though it's probably the first time any girl has kissed him – poor sweet summer child lol

If I had to make a guess at the narrative canon I'd say number one, because we know for a fact that Cloud hasn't been driving for years. Boi gets motion sickness ffs! And when did he ever drive a motorcycle? I'd definitely buy that being one of the first times he's ever driven, which would explain why he did so poorly and why he has multiple varied expressions in that result.

[artificialqueens]

AQ author interview tag:

Pen Name: dartmouth420

Pronouns: she/her

How long have you been involved in the RPDR fandom?: oh boy i’ve been reading fics since 2016-ish but i’ve been watching the show since season 5 aired

And what got you started?: as with any new media i consume i did a cursory investigation of the fanfic just to see what people were up to… loved every minute of it (biadore pulled me in first lmao) and during a span of unemployment i decided i wanted more rajila lol and started writing

Favorite queens and/or ships to write: i generally write rajila, ravjila, rujubee, but there are many other queens i really enjoy as characters and there are some other rare-pairs i might explore down the line !

Favorite genres to to write: i mostly write lesbian AUs, angst, idiots-in-love, awkward sex scenes are my favourite thing in the world, i often dip into themes of mental illness and trauma, as well as unnecessarily dark stuff that i don’t post lol. i’ll read just about anything but i LOVE genre-specific AUs (shoutout to Veronica&Dane for galactica, MistressAQ for their star trek au <3)

Where you post: aq a little but mostly i post on a03! 

Most popular fic: Prepare to Use Force If Necessary got a fair amount of attention which really surprised me because it’s not shippy or smutty, it’s basically a very drawn-out adoption fic :)

Favorite story you’ve written so far: I don’t have a favourite, they all have aspects i like and dislike in equal measure!

Longest fic you’ve written (and word count if you want): Prepare to Use Force If Necessary is 66,963 words lmao it could use an edit down… 

Fic you were nervous to post: Nostalgia for sure, because it’s canon compliant m/m which was outside my comfort zone, and it centres around a low-key toxic friendship so i wasn’t sure how that would be met! also i challenged myself to write it as AS5 was airing so it left little time for editing (i usually sit on a fic for a while before posting)

Favorite comment you’ve ever gotten on your fic: pink-grapefruit-cafe once sent in a comment praising Nostalgia when i was posting that and it made me so happy!!! thank you!! also this one rando on a03 once commented “jesus” on my one-shot (Famous Blue Raincoat) and i don’t know what that meant but i think about it all the time lmao. hilariously on the same story i also received an excellent, resounding comment (thank you lemyanka from a03) so that was really nice too <3 i like the different reactions people have :)

Do you accept prompts?: i don’t accept prompts directly but i have certainly seen prompts posted here aq and been inspired by them!

How you choose your titles: with great frustration

Do you outline?: yes! when i commit to writing a fic i write down single lines describing loosely what’ll happen in each scene, i.e. [raja confronts manila with her suspicions, they argue then make out] it’s not always in the right order. i write random scenes and if i like a scene enough, i’ll build a story around it. for example, with PTUFIN the very first scene i wrote was manila’s nervous breakdown, and basically built the fic around it as the pivotal moment.

Number of completed fics: 6

Number of fics in progress: uhhhh 4? honestly there so many looool

Number of fics coming soon/not yet started posting: here’s what i’ve got up my sleeve right now: an art world au about navigating an open relationship, a catholic high school au, a fight club au, a canon-compliant(ish) near-future dystopian hunger games fic that’s too dark for my own good lol, a lesbian au where the main character has severe agoraphobia/ocd, low-key Marriage Story au where the main character is trying to raise her kid after recently separating from her long time partner… oh the list goes on. and i hope to finish Nostalgia sometime :)

Upcoming work that you’re most excited about: the art world open relationship au is SUCH a soap opera lmao, but it’s almost done, it’s like 50,000 words tho and reaaaaaaaal angsty/emotional/smutty

Anything else you want readers to know!!: every time i get a comment i ascend into the sky with joy, seriously. i love every single person who’s ever bothered to say anything nice to me <3 <3 <3 <3. i’ve never worked with a beta reader but i think that could be fun! also, i think about the infamous ‘rajila sex anon’ every day of my life ahahaha

[glowstickia]

Author Interview

tagged by @potatocrab :3 thank~

tagging: @achamocha, @allislaughter, @gentlydetecting, @thestarjar, @kineticallyanywhere, @saintdeanthomas, @ihopethismakessense @memaidraws AND THE PERSON READING THIS! YOU YES YOU IF YOU WANNA DO IT THEN JUST DO IT!

Name: Glow

Fandom(s): uuuuuh...Danny Phantom, The Adventure Zone (used to write for both), Fallout, and several others that I don’t write for lol

Where You Post: Tumblr and Ao3 (Glowstickia...its my brand)

Most Popular One-Shot: ...its...its the crossover ship fic I wrote years ago ain’t it. *checks* It motherfuckin is. I KNEW IT. Goddamn...2014 was a year... I don’t wanna talk about it lol

Most Popular Multi-Chapter Story: I mainly write one-shots. And its def something pnat related cause I have so many pnat fics oh my god. Several of which are like multi-chapter.

Favorite Story You Wrote: PTH tough...I got like 64 fics man XD Hm... Counterbalance. I may not be into pnat anymore...but hot damn I’m like still motherfuckin PROUD OF IT! The stars fuckin aligned for that fic...also its uuuuuh choose your own adventure lololol Otherwise...my current stuff (ie Fallout fics) I’m like “oh hell yea I’m happy with this”

How You Choose Your Titles: If its a one word title...typically that’s the prompt I had lol. I’m very fuckin partial to using song titles tho XD if I’m listening to a song while writing a fic on repeat...that song is gonna be tied to that fic/those characters involved.

Complete: I...know I have a bad track record with completing multi-chapter fics. It’s mostly cause of like, life getting in the way, or I lose interest cause like hardly anyone really leaves feedback on my stuff haha ah... I have adhd like baaaad. I’m also a motherfuckin slow writer. BUT! One-shots? I got dem for days man. I can complete the hell out of them!!! I’m just...real fuckin slow looool XD

Incomplete: This goes back to my bad track record with multi-chapter fics. Thankfully like...I fuckin learned about the [bracket] method so now I’m like...more likely to PUSH THROUGH things. I also am like constantly juggling like several wips at once haha

Do You Outline?: It’s typically vague af. “I want this to happen” and that’s basically it. If its longer...bit more in depth. But like brackets? HELP SO MUCH

Coming Soon/Not Yet Started: Well, many things. Ch2 of Sanctuary Hills...is making slow progress BUT PROGRESS! Work’s been kickin my ass lol. I did some edits and still need to write the last fuckin chuuuunk which isn’t much but I’m dragging my feet LOL Also, Rest & Rewind is sorta at a standstill mostly cause I like what I got, but I want to push a bit more cause like hey...bonding. There’s also the “mansion” fic I maybe blowing a bit out of proportion OOPS but I’m having fun coming up with more spooky shit haha. NOOOOT to mention like other things I have planned... :3c

Do You Accept Prompts?: Yes! But I’m like...really weird about them? I gotta hit a certain mindset for them. Also, being a slow writer, I just seriously need to take a step back and stop trying to make everything fuckin long XD I think I just need to try drabbles again. I do miss writing short af stuff lol STILL!!! Feel free to send! They’ll probs sit for a bit, but I’ll def hit them up! tumblr’s wonk and like...I’ll forget about asks sometimes too...oops

Upcoming Story You Are Most Excited To Write: That spooky mansion fic I mentioned ngl. I’m totes excited to write more spooky shit! Esp since it’ll be The END Squad (Echo, Nick, & Deacon ;3c ) But I’m also...excited for uh a few other things? Mostly, some uh super indulgent stuff I’m trying to push myself to do more. I’m a bit like “BUT PLOT”, but also...the indulgence...

[waywardfacegarden]

TAG GAME!

I was tagged by @mipadremadara !! Thank you so much??? I was so beyond words, so flattered, haha😅💕 Probably really dork-y, but I'm a total dork according to Sources, so.

Rules: tag 9 people you want to get to know better

Top 3 ships:

Now this is just plain cruel lol, how am I supposed to choose ONLY 3??!?!? Impossible. But well, I'm going to write three of my main:

1) Narusasu/Sasunaru (of course. like who do you take me for??? Lol. they'll always be my number 1 :'D They have such a special place in my heart. And I have nothing to add about them because if I start I'll never shut up.)

2) Todobaku because I'm utterly OBSESSED with them recently lol. They have so much potential!! And the ship just keeps getting more and more interesting, the chemistry is off the charts!! The potential angst! The dumbassery! Nothing better than two dumbasses being in love. Two socially awkward, emotional disasters boys falling deep in love without knowing?? Oof, what is better than that??

3) Now this one was HARD because I have so many ships!!! But finally, I set up for one that I recently got to know and it's totally the cutest thing ever?? I don't even know their ship name (and sadly, I think there's not EVEN one, the fandom is so small I guess???) but they're Endou and Yamai from Konbini-kun; they're the cutest, softest thing ever?? Just a pure gay boy scared of being gay for Reasons getting to know (and falling for) his same-age boy co-worker, deliquent-who's-not-a-deliquent-at-all-and-is-actually-the-sweetest-bean-slash-animal-lover???? Oof. I love them both. They're my kids. ENDOU IS M Y BOY AND IF ANYONE EVER HURTS HIM I'LL KILL THEM WITHOUT DOUBT. Also, Yamai is so freaking sweet????????!!! Should be a crime. He's an adorable, gentle, amazing good boy, I love him.

+ As a bonus:

Harold/Sam/Nobu from the Canis Series (The Speaker) are The OT3, thank you very much. Never in my life have I ever fell in love so deep with a poly ship (CANON. CANON POLY SHIP) with three broken boys that are currently the "villians" of the story. Heartbreaking, full of angst ship, yet so beautiful. (IF YOU EVER READ THIS. [WHICH I REC SM] BE WARNED THAT THE STORY IS DARK. THE FIRST PART NO, BUT THIS SPECIFIC PART [THE SECOND] IS FULL OF DARK SHIT. Amazingly well-written and heart-wrenching but. Yeah. It's dark and heavy. Idk to describe HOW much but it is.)

Andddd Yuiji/Yamato from Koimonogatari, bc even if they're not canon I'm so rooting for them??? I hope they get together bc they DESERVE each other. They're just so sweet and their relationship is SO real and natural idek how to describe this warm feeling that fills me every time I see them. (Just for a bit of context, Yamato is gay and likes Yuiji's best friend. But for reasons, Yuiji realizes this, tells Yamato, and after Yamato Panics Yuji assures him he's not going to tell anyone bc he actually Likes Him As A Person (quoting) and he doesn't want to hurt him. They become friends and then get closer and become Friends who trust each other way too much and it's just really sweet how fond Yuiji is of Yamato??? My heart swells. He just looks at him with the softest eyes and [I know I said this was going to be brief but you know me already, you really thought I was going to be brief????? Haha no sir] he's so understanding??? He's always listening to Yamato without judging, asking him if he's okay, worrying about him, CARING, and cheering him up, it's just???? Even if they don't get together, they're the purest friendship ever.

One of my top ten moments from them:

Yuiji to Yamato: You are totally pessimistic, too damn honest, a real pain in the ass, but... I like you. [...] Someday, I hope you come to love yourself as well.

Yeah I didn't even had to look it up, THAT'S how much I read the scene and painted in my mind lol.)

Carrying on to the next question after all my rambling...

Last movie you watched:

I just watched The Fundamentals of Caring yesterday. Paul Rudd is shining as always, of course. Kind of dark humor with a slice of romance and emotional shit that left me crying lol. It was really really good imo, perfect Teens Who Don't Give a Shit and Adopting a New Family vibes. Messy but really well-done imo. (I'm just rec and promoting every thing I watch/read/ship at this point huh...)

Reading:

I'm currently reading only mangas AAAA, hahaha. I'm with Koimonogatari (still on going), Owari no Seraph, Haikyuu!!, The Speaker, Red White and Royal Blue (first and only book on this list lol), Omamorishimasu Dokomademo (hope I wrote this correctly loool), Kimi wa Natsu no Naka and Blue Sky Complex :))

Next on my reading list:

Seven Days (bc I heard this manga is Gold), Origin (a manga I bought months ago and never read), L's light-novel (The Los Angeles BB Murder Cases), Himitsu, and Golden Days.

Also, I made a bow with myself to read every single last manga Hayakawa Nojiko has made because their art is the most stunning, poetic, alluring thing I've ever laid my eyes on. So simple yet so, so unbelievable pretty. Also, their mangas are so so so good and so so so sweet and well-written??? Best mangaka goes to Hayakawa-sensei.

And from books, "Last Night I sang to the Monster" has been on my I-need-to-read-this list since soooo long. Benjamín is my favorite author. I hope I can give me some time to read it later.

What food are you craving right now:

For some reallyyyy weird reason, sea-food??? Lmao I don't even know. My cravings have been varying from fried-chicken burger from KFC to That Strawberry Cheesecake from SAM's lmao. It's pretty weird. But right now???? Give me shrimps. Fish. I'm In Need. Looool.

I'm tagging (although you're not under Any Obligation to do it if you don't want to) @tatakaedrey @jackverglas @tetsuskitten and I don't know who else???? Ahh haha, whoever wants to do it, I guess??😅

THANK YOU SO MUCH AGAIN FOR TAGGING ME :')

[celacestial]

A reminder/A bit of wholesomeness...

I just wanted to post a little reminder now the ego art weeks are ‘over’ (perhaps, for now 🤔). There doesn’t have to be a specific event in order for you to create stuff. These events bring people together and certainly make it easier to get the creative juices flowing, sure, and I and others are beyond grateful to Seán for hosting the event, but that doesn’t have to end. Everything you make and post can, and will, still have value for someone.

Art: Art is important. I haven’t even been active on Tumblr for a year yet (a year at the end of the month) and I’ve only been active on Twitter for just under 18 months, but I’m already getting to recognise lots of your amazing art styles, and watching your amazing growth just in the short time I’ve been here has been amazing! I love seeing what new ideas you all come up with, new styles you’re all trying, new things you’re experimenting with. I also love seeing “new” artists pop up, and getting show love to and support their work.

GIFs: Recording memorable moments as GIFs? Hell yeah! Recording positive speeches and nuggets of advice? Hell Yeah! Getting quality reaction material? Hell Yeah! Animations, or edited GIFs from the original to make something even MORE creative? Hell damn yeah! I love a good GIF of all kinds and all “skill levels”. And the creative way you guys arrange some of them to make song lyrics, for example, colour patterns, all sorts of things, blows my mind.

Edits: I’ve used many amazing as wallpapers in my time (the ones that allow permission of course) and had a laugh or shed a tear at many awesome video edits, and you’re all SO talented! And again, just like art, I’m recognising some of your editing styles as well. The way you have all learned to use transitions and new filters is amazing! It is appreciated by everyone more than you probably know.

Stories: To my shame, I don’t interact much with a lot of fan fiction, but I often read when I see in the tag or it comes up in the tag. I sometimes feel bad for that though, because I know creators like Seán can’t interact very much with fanfiction in case them doing so means it is taken as canon lol. But DAMN are some of you fantastic with words! You know your ways around a pen/a keyboard better than I could ever hope to in a million years. And I’m sure that a lot of fanfiction has probably inspired a lot of other art and creative posts too. Keep doing what you’re doing writers everywhere!

Theories: Oh boy do I love reading these 😂 And often get scared by how much Seán may have seen and the ideas he may have got looool. It always keeps my mind racing at various times of the day, gets my own ideas pumping (if only I was creative enough to actually put some of them into fruition). One of my favourite things about theories as well is how they can get a dialogue going between community members which is always fun to see the back and forth of that, and coming to an eventual conclusion (or not!) Keep it up guys! 💚

Text Posts: Share your random thoughts gamers! Any little observations about videos, about creators, about life in general. Anything you’re doing with your day. A little story you think that the community might want to hear. I love seeing little random observations in the tag, or photos and posts from people’s real lives, all of which will help us to get to know you as a person better, and bring the community together, rather than seeing us all as a bunch of numbers or lines of code. Your opinions are creative, your life updates are of value.

Memes: Tempted to say memes make the world go round 😂 Want a laugh? Have a meme! Want a joke? Have a meme! Want to make a point but can’t think of the right words? Meme it! Yeah, they can get samey, but at the same time, many people love them and will appreciate them regardless. The beauty of memes is that they are evolving all the time and it’s always fun to watch you guys using your creativity to come up with new memes, or make new takes on old meme formats and long running community jokes.

What I have liked about these Egoartweeks is that it’s kind of shifted people’s thinking. People seemed to have realised that there was a disconnect between the types of content that people regularly interact with, and these weeks have kind of given people a renewed inspiration to create anything, and a renewed wish to see all kinds of posts, not just a certain kind, which is fantastic!

The message to come out of these few weeks, is that creating because you love creating, for the love of sharing your creations with others, is the most important thing. Whatever you can post contributes to this community, and could inspire others in their ideas and creative journeys too! But what’s also important to remember is that it’s not the type of post that’s important. It’s YOU that’s important. YOU are the thing that matters. Not your follower count. Not keeping up a consistent amount of notes on every single post, it’s okay if one doesn’t get as many. What matters is your enjoyment of what you do! Don’t think that your work is any less important than any other creator for any reason. If you are having fun creating it, if you put as much time and effort into creating it as you were able and you were happy enough with the results to post it, to me that is the MOST important thing, the fact that you are making something that you enjoy and want to share that with people, it is highly appreciated, by me, by others, and by Seán and any creator you may or may not be aiming the post at, if they happen to see it.

Keep posting and interacting with what you love for as long as you love making/seeing it. Know that there will always be someone out there who appreciates who you are and what you create, even if you haven’t found your audience yet. Keep creating for as long as you want to, and don’t let anyone or anything change your ideas. Because I seriously love you guys, I’m glad you’re all here, and I hope you know the immense value that you all bring to this community and to the world 💚 Established event or not

Okay back to the Seán induced flames now 🔥

[glassesandkim]

What has changed for me in the past 10 years?

Tagged by @schmico-ing !!

1. Have you moved? No, but we moved to a new house probably a year or two before 2010. Which means I’ve been in this house for 10+ years! 

2. Have you graduated? 2010 was when I graduated from high school and then I graduated from uni in 2015 or something. LOL! Can I remember when? No. 

3. Has your marital status changed? I used to believe I would get married at 24 to which I laugh at with the biggest cackle of the century. 

4. Has your parental status changed? Also used to think I’d have kids at 26-28 and I might as well run into the wall at this point because I won’t have much air left from all the laughing. 

(Basically, high school me thought I’d be all set up for life by now BUT ROOOOFL YOU WISH, 2010-CRISTA!!)

5. Has your hair color changed?  I had really bad ombre for a bit.

6. Has your job changed? 

I’ve probably worked 10+ jobs since 2010: sales at a home fabrication place, worked the phones at a cancer research non-profit, high school tutor, marketing at some sketch-ass company, pet care associate at PetSmart, temp receptionist at another non-profit, till/sales at a sports centre, photographer/editor, and now finally, working at a vet hospital. 

7. Has your OTP changed? I think I was either super into Smosh (Ianthony) or Drarry or Merthur. I’ll say my OTP is still Merthur because that shit hurts my soul. And it’s about to be Christmas Eve again...... CAN YOU BELIEVE THEY KILLED ARTHUR AND MADE MERLIN LIVE FOR 10,000 YEARS WITHOUT HIS OTHER HALF ON CHRISTMAS EVE?????

8. Has your pet status changed? I GOT A CAT!!!! 5 years ago! Plus I have a bunch of fishies. 

9. What new places did you visit? Japan, Florida, Southern California (LA, Santa Monica), and Portland.

10. What is an accomplishment you are proud of? Not really an accomplishment, but I’ve been through some heavy stuff these last couple years and while I’m not where I thought I would be according to 10-years-younger-Me, I’m still happy. Happy again after realizing happiness wasn’t what I was experiencing for a few months/a year. Trauma is a strange thing. And now those reading this might be wondering wtf happened to me??? Long story short: I was in a very abusive workplace - got yelled at, belittled - basically had to face verbal and emotional abuse everyday for 2 years. I felt trapped by obligation and loyalty because while the workplace was toxic AS FUCK, I loved the job. I genuinely loved it. I’m still trying to navigate my life post-hell (I really call it Hell). I can’t look or do certain things without feeling incredible sadness and I definitely have untreated PTSD and other issues like dissociating myself from things when it gets too hard. BUT DAMN AM I HAPPY. I didn’t know I was unhappy until I left. I got lots to work on but at least I’m not being choked and slowly killed everyday of my life. At least I don’t have panic attacks just walking into a goddamn building. Now I have time to do what I like and have hobbies and get to spend time with the important people in my life again. 

Anyway, sorry to leave this post on such a weird note. But now it’s time to tag people to do this. Except I’m just going to tag @orthoglasses LOOOOL 

[the-darklings]

—YOU GOT MAIL!!!

Hey, folks! So instead of absolutely slamming my followers with replies to your messages that I should have gotten to a week ago, I’m instead going to just put everything under the cut and in one place!

Thank you so much, everyone, for the love you’ve shown “unravelling” series/finale, especially people who are usually shy about commenting on things. I seriously appreciate your bravery! <33

I have plans for 5k celebration later (that may or may not involve you guys too 👀) and then we’ll be back to typical scheduling! Keep it awesome lads!

@the-kryomancer NIC I’M SO DAMN GLAD YOU LIKE IT?? I’M REALLY SORRY IT TOOK ME SO LONG TO RESPOND TOO BUT THIS GOT BURIED IN MY INBOX UGHH. MY HEART IS SOFT KNOWING YOU LIKE IT THO. LOVE YA!!! <33

Thank you, love! I really hope you liked the final part (if you’re still reading it) because I loved writing it. Thanks for the support! :D

AHHHHHH!!! THAT IS ACTUALLY REALLY STRANGE BECAUSE SAME??? I’VE NEVER MET ANYONE WITH MY BIRTHDAY EITHER?? THAT’S CRAZY AND REALLY COOL. *HIGH FIVES A FELLOW CANCER DARLING*

WOW! Thank you so much for saying this??? I admit I’m very particular about characterization and always try to work as hard possible on bringing out the absolute best out of my writing by getting these characters down as accurately as possible. Thank you for your kind words though. They mean a lot. <33

@winterierwriter HE’S A GARBAGE MAN BUT WE RELUCTANTLY STAN!!! THANK YOU FOR READING LOVE! 

@soul-eating-butterfly You’re amazing for being this kind and sending your support my way. Thank you so much, dear. I seriously appreciate it! 

@oceandsrtworld hey sweetie! Firstly, I’m SO SORRY it took me ages to get back to you. With how busy I’ve been this week this message got buried and I just saw it today sorting through everything. So, again, sorry if it took me ages to get back to you. As for your question: simple to navigate theme is a good start, tag everything, read and give feedback to other people and that way they’re more likely to check out your blog/writing and it’s way more fun having friends to gush with. I would suggest starting out with a bigger/active fandom to get you started and to get the initial following. Everyone loves good stories so if the fandom is bigger it’s more likely people will flock to you quickly. Don’t worry if you don’t explode right away, it usually takes time to build up a following. Good luck and if it’s a fandom familiar to me, please let me know! I will try and make some time to check your stuff out/give you a follow! Wishing you well x

IT IS LITERALLY THE BEST FEELING EVER AND I HAVE MISSED IT SO MUCHHHH AHHH THANK YOU, SWEETIE! :D

@mysterios-hoe THANK YOU SO MUCH <33

That’s a big compliment wow. Thank you, dear. Hope your friend liked it! 

@ghost-with-spaghetti-arms skskskskks thank you so much! It makes me so happy knowing that you like it??? I really appreciate your support. Thanks! 

LOVE YOU MORE!! 😭😭😭

THANK YOUUUUU. I’M GLAD YOU LIKE OUR BELOVED GARBAGE MAN!!! 

@coffeeandmusicinthemorning THANK YOU SO MUCH!! Love YA! <33

Not right now, sadly~~ BUUUUT keep an eye out, I’m going to be doing something special for the 5k celebration!

@starksrhodes AHHHH I LOVE YOU AND YOU POSITIVITY!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALWAYS BEING SO KIND AND LOVELY. IT’S SUPER SWEET AND I APPRECIATE IT SO MUCH SDHFSKDHF LOVE YA!!!

@walkingmajority LOOOOL THIS MADE ME LAUGH. IT’S REALLY JUST BE LIKE THAT MY FRIEND!! Thank you tho. I’m glad you’re enjoying more of the bastard fishbowl man!!

AHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH LOVE!!!! The fact that you keep rereading it warms my heart sdfndskfhsjkdfhskjnn

@buckybearsblog HI, hONeY~~ ahhh, honestly tho, thank you so much. Screaming is always the reaction I’m looking for hahaha. I’m so glad you enjoyed it! Thank you for reading, dear. <33

@eversonaive ahh, I’m so glad you liked it! Sadly, the last part was the finale, so it’s over for now. But I have more planned so keep your eye out! :D

@coffeeandmusicinthemorning FIRST, I HOPE YOU FEEL BETTER SOON! Second, I’m glad you liked it ;))

@off-to-elsewhere YOU’RE SO WELCOME!!! :D THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING AND BEING AMAZING THO! I REALLY APPRECIATE IT! LOVE YA LOTS! 

Oh, anon. I would love to. But please keep in mind that my inbox is a mess and my Tumblr is notorious for chewing up asks so I worry about losing messages. Feel free to DM me tho, I swear I’m nice just terrible at time management and may take a while to reply ahhh

@thatoneemosithlord thank you, dear! I agree we need more of him and I shall that burden onto my shoulders haha. Thank you so much for reading! I really appreciate it. 

I’m a nerd. That’s it. kjsdhfjksdhf no, truthfully if I get attached to a character, I immediately go into overdrive, trying to note all the details and ticks that make them tick e.g speech patterns, movement etc. Characterisation is about detail. Mostly it just comes down to that.  

WOW. While I have detached myself from DBH fandom due to personal reasons, I appreciate this so much?? Thank you. The idea of my work helping someone like this is heartwarming and beyond flattering. Thank you again, wonderful person! I wish you luck, friend! 

@acelacey Ahhh, this is such a lovely message, thank you! I’ll be honest, I have no idea how I managed to get 20k out in a little over a week but it happened and I’m so happy with it because I loved writing it. You and everyone else being so supportive and loving just added to it. Thank you for this message. Made me grin like an idiot. Hope you’re having a lovely day! :D