#‘and nothing really rocks and nothing really rolls and nothing’s ever worth the cost’

[stainlesssteellocust]

So since the Custodes have canonical access to modern human cultural material it is in fact totally plausible for Bayezara to be playing whatever cheesy music is appropriate for riding a motorcycle down from space

Shield-Captain Valerian: So according to heretical M2 theologian Inmanuel Kant-

Shield-Captain Bayezara: I’M GONNA HIT HIGH ORBIT LIKE A BATTERING RAM ON A GOLDEN-BLACK ANTIGRAV BIKE

Valerian: In terms of the Categorical Imperative-

Baezara: CAUSE THE METAL IS HOT, AND THE ENGINE IS HUNGRY, AND YOU’RE ALL ABOUT TO SEE THE LIGHT

[walriding]

born to run and bat out of hell you will always be the most miles coded songs

[sswwmmpptthhnngg]

Bat Out of Hell

→ Pairings: Eddie x HendersonSister!Reader

✶ After five years, you are desperate to bury the past, burn the cards Hawkins dealt. You couldn’t wait to be through with that godforsaken town. To put it in your rearview and never return. You need closure from the fracturing loss of your Eddie. Will the five year memorial of his passing bring you healing or just more hurt?

Nothing ever grows in this rotting old hole And everything is stunted and lost And nothing really rocks and nothing really rolls And nothing's ever worth the cost ✶

→ Warnings: angst, anxiety, mental health, hurt/comfort, vignette style flashbacks, eventual smut, slow burn, drug/alcohol mention/use, 18+ minors dni

→ teaser

↳ chapter 01 / 02 (coming soon)

[merv606]

This is very long so I apologize.

Mercy Ch 28

It really speaks of how delusional Terry is because he both credits and blames Daniel for things that, in reality, actually have nothing to do with him.

There’s so much to unpack.

But - first and foremost - what kills me is: he thinks he’s not an addict. He refuses to call it for what it is —among so many other things, things we could spend years talking about and dissecting like: kidnapping, sexual assault/molestation, stalking, psychological warfare. He genuinely thinks he gets out of being a diagnosed addict because he was briefly able to abstain in ‘85.

He credits Daniel for that abstinence, when really his motivation for maintaining was he wanted to be clear enough to hurt him. To carry out his coke-fueled plan of revenge.

He also leaves out the part where that it was not only his addiction but his greed and his illegal activities are what cost him his business, half his fortune (because half a billion dollars is rock bottom?! Fucking rich people 🙄) and why Cobra Kai was banned.

Mike Barnes rethought his life after his karate ban. He lost his half of a fortune and his karate too. But he chose a different path.

So did Terry evidently. Too bad he went in the even more wrong direction.

And now Terry thinks Daniel is what makes all the bad things in his life worth having gone through.

He went through Viet Nam, PTSD, drug addiction, and Kreese. But that it all had to happen in order to meet Daniel.

But truly none of it had anything to do with meeting Daniel.

It’s not hard to see why he comes to this conclusion — he’s technically correct in that it lead to meeting Kreese, it lead to his involvement and creation of Cobra Kai, and it lead to the possibility of crossing paths with Daniel.

But really it came down to his choices.

Because even with all that going on, he still never should have crossed paths with Daniel.

What lead to that was his choice to target a teenager for a perceived wrongdoing. Even Kreese wasn’t looking for revenge, he was ready to roll over and die — the revenge was Terry’s idea.

It’s not that Daniel never would have met Terry if it weren’t for Viet Nam/Cobra Kai/Kreese… Hell even Johnny didn’t know who he was… it’s: he never would have met Terry if it weren’t for Terry.

His entitlement is why they met. He decided Daniel needed to be punished for something he didn’t do. For something he wasn’t responsible for. Somewhere he figured out Daniel couldn’t possibly have been responsible for Kreese’s bullshit. But his lack of ability to take any sort of blame or responsibility is why TKK3 happened and why his storyline in CK is happening. It’s why Mercy is happening.

He blames Daniel for things he didn’t do: you broke Kreese, you destroyed Cobra Kai, you need to be taught a lesson… you made me want you, it’s your fault I’m obsessed with you.

Then he credits him — But it was all worth it because I’m free now, your destruction of Kreese and CK is why I’m free and you’re what I needed.

It’s almost as if he wants to simultaneously thank and punish Daniel for his obsession with him.

He thinks Daniel gave him back his life. That he freed him from the lie he was living.

He way of thinking is so incredibly warped…

I’m getting serious Erotomanic vibes from Terry. He has got to be the most functional Erotomanic I’ve ever come across in the fandom world 😂

And poor poor Daniel will pay the price for his lunacy.

Excellent installment… I can’t praise you enough for your ability to capture the sheer insanity that is Terry Silver. I hope I survive long enough to read the rest because I continue to die for more 😂

☝🏻☝🏻

Thank you so much 😊

and you never need to apologize for lengthy commentary - or long asks in general!!

[eraserdude6226]

Watch "Meat Loaf - Bat Out of Hell (PCM Stereo)" on YouTube

October 28th, 1977 - that was the day my mind was blown!!

That was the day that Meatloaf blew my little teenage mind away!! Just having been released a week earlier by Cleveland Records and eager to get as much airplay for an epic rock anthem such as this, they played this video on a local sci-fi movie show called "Houlihan and Big Chuck" in Cleveland, Ohio. Seeing how this was before the whole MTV era, any airplay was good airplay, even on a show that was local and did not attract a lot of viewers!! My mind was FREAKING BLOWN AWAY!!

But Meatloaf's message still holds true today as it did then: "... because nothing really rocks and nothing really rolls and nothing's ever worth the cost!!"

When Meatloaf died a while ago, it was like one of the greatest voices of my age was silenced!! It was a very sad (week) for me!! But Meatloaf lives in everyone I pop a playlist of his in my computer and get taken back to those carefree days of my youth!!

Long live Meatloaf!!

[dancing-to-architecture]

10 of 1001

Today's album: Meatloaf - Bat Out of Hell (1977)

The Loaf arrives!

Now, here is an album cover that I've always thought looked cool as hell since i first saw it in my dad's milk crate full of LPs, but i never got around to actually listening to it (mostly because i was really into the Beatles at that point in time, specifically Sgt. Pepper, incidentally another one of the album covers of all time, and not long after my Beatles phase came the phase i call "the total collapse of my parents' marriage" which led to a distinct and immediate lack of access to any part of my dad's record collection from then on).

Okay, unnecessary family history corner is now over, time to start Loafing.

Right off the bat, before I've even hit play, i have to notice: 7 songs, 46+ minute runtime, which means that the average song length is over 6 minutes. Now, something like this can be as much a positive thing for me as a negative thing.

On the one hand, there's been The Doors' tiresome meandering and King Crimson's acid jazz (in that 'it's about the notes you don't play', and no notes were played for like 3 minutes), but on the other hand I'm also fairly into post-rock and i have, on multiple occasions, referred to a 20+ minute long song by Godspeed You! Black Emperor as "a banger". (Rockets Fall on Rocket Falls is a killer, fight me.) Then i remembered that this is Meatloaf, the King of the Power Ballad, and also that Paradise by the Dashboard Light is roughly 174 minutes long.

Bat Out of Hell-

This intro fucking rules! Goddamn, that piano player should be chained to a wall somewhere for pounding on those keys that hard.

Some really great lines here "nothing ever grows in this rotting old hole/

And everything is stunted and lost/

And nothing really rocks and nothing really rolls

And nothing's ever worth the cost." PREACH.

Man, so much happens in this one song. It's a love song, it's a one night stand song, it's got the sudden and violent death of the narrator/pov character in the opening song of what i was led to believe was a three-album rock opera-lite... Hell, I've written legitimate short stories where less plot happens than within this song.

You Took The Words Right Out Of My Mouth (Hot Summer Night)-

To know me is to know that I've offered my throat to much more dangerous things than the wolf with the red roses.

Kind of a repetitive chorus, but it's only 5 minutes long, how is *anybody* supposed to tell a story in that short of an amount of time? :V

Heaven Can Wait-

So i was *almost* in this play in high school and- oh, this is a different thing.

"And all i got is time until the end of time" is a great line.

Okay, for real, who was the pianist on this album? (Aside: Bat Out of Hell was composed by Jim Steinman, who has *one hell* of a Wikipedia page, and the piano played by Roy Bitten of the goddamned E STREET BAND. Wait, also mixed by Todd Rundgren? Hot damn, no wonder this is like the 6th best-selling album of all time.)

All Revved Up with No Place to Go-

Well that's some Springsteeny as FUCK horns there, huh?

And to be honest with you, Mr. Loaf? No, i don't really know what that's like. Most of the time I'm put into situations with little to no revving whatsoever, and it's infrequent that i really desire a place to go, especially if I'm already home.

The middle breakdown about drawing first blood just feels strange and kinda out of place to me, but i am Not a person who wrote three albums with combined 100 million units sold, so my opinion is just that.

The faster end right after that kicks some ass, though.

Two out of Three Ain't Bad-

Well the title is regarding what might be the most depressing sentiment i can think of.

And then the second verse starts and it stays sad, just in a dramatically different way. Sad in a "okay, yeesh, get over your old flame already, dude, you said it yourself, it's been YEARS" kind of way.

Like Stephen Stills said (7 years before this album came out): "if you can't be with the one you love, honey, love the one you're with", because this? just ain't it. Open up your heart a bit.

Paradise By the Dashboard Light- I've heard this song a number of times throughout my life, and i don't think i ever clocked just how insanely horny it is.

I guess i never really thought too hard about the lyrics, mostly because the last time i heard this song it was on the radio and i was still a kid. The baseball announcer part is kinda clever about it at least.

Ellen Foley CRUSHES her part of the duet. It's like the power-belting is a competition between her and Loaf, and she's gonna get that fuckin gold, come hell or high water.

Also just saying, ladies, if you ask someone if they love you, and they say "uhh, get back to me on that one, i gotta sleep on it"? They don't, and they won't. Don't waste your time.

But that last line is still pretty hilarious, all said and done.

For Crying Out Loud-

Okay, if this album and the two after, the trinity of bats into and out of hell, are all supposed to be like one continuous story throughout, then this song's placement right after Paradise is incredibly darkly funny.

Also, do we really need the image of meatloaf's turgid hog ripping through his jeans, twice? in one song?

(It's not so explicit, but you tell me what "can't you see my faded Levi's bursting apart?" is regarding, because while Meatloaf was a bigger dude, i really don't think he's talking about splitting the seam on the ass, and there are definitely other rhymes for "heart".)

Also, another false ending with 3 minutes left in the song. These songs wouldn't be so long if you stopped *trying* to end them and just ended them, man. (I'm being facetious here, but only kinda.)

Overall, a really good album. I can easily see why it sold so many copies, but i was honestly expecting it to be a bit heavier, given how hard that cover art goes.

Favorite Track: Bat Out of Hell! That intro, the economy of storytelling within (it's. so. much. plot!), the piano is on fire, all in all just one (bat out of) hell of an opening song.

Least Favorite Track: initially, i was gonna say You Took the Words, mostly for the repetition at the close of it, but actually sitting down and reading the lyrics to Two Out of Three Ain't Bad REALLY killed that song for me. It is bad, and you should feel shame.

[crystalelemental]

Unit Teambuilding - Leon

After two whole years, Leon finally gets rerun, and I just want to say that is nonsense.  I get that gachas are about limited availability and FOMO, but two years?  It may as well not even exist at that point.   Things need to be recurring for them to matter, guys.  This took way, way too long.  It's a serious problem.  Fix it.

General Overview I would describe Leon as “Anni Lillie-esque.”  Which is funny because he came first.  That’s what you get for taking so long to rerun.

Leon’s Inferno is high BP, but nothing remarkable by modern standards.  In fact, for having a pathetic 50 accuracy, it’s...fairly weak.  183BP for 50 accuracy is weaker than SC Emmet’s Megahorn (189), which has better accuracy (85).  I think it’s just wild to see how much DeNA tends to value status application as a secondary effect, because I legitimately don’t think it’s worth the trade.  But because of this tradeoff, Leon’s DPS barely breaks top five, slightly managing to outperform his eternal rival, Sygna Suit Red.  But he’s miles behind SS Hilda, SS May, SS Hilbert, and even SS Lysandre.

What allows Leon to compete, and even become best in show, is Super Preparation 4.  When he lands that Supereffective Up Next, he’s far and away the highest Fire-type DPS.  It is only a 50/50 to get it though, so the average of his typical damage is somewhere around SS May level power.  Which isn’t bad!  His Flying-type DPS, with Super Preparation active, is also highest in the type.  Ground...doesn’t even break top 5.  Ground got really competitive.  Cynthia’s up there twice because Slash apparently gets ridiculous too.  I love it.

To add into Leon’s success, they finally gave him Max Moves!  This means he’s got a sudden pop damage across all three of these types!  That’s really handy!  But for Gauntlet purposes, where you may not have any supereffective matchups, picking which one matters, and...look, it’s Flying.  His Fire-type move was translated as Fire Damage Field like Stealth Rock, and I have confirmed from my wife’s account that every single fight has Fire DF Resistance 9, so it deals nothing.  Shoulda been Trap.  Just saying.  So Flying is optimal, because +2 speed with his gauge costs is really nice.

All that said, Leon’s damage is his selling point, but his flaws are woefully apart.  Aside from the ever-present issue of needing to always roll Super Preparation 4 to sustain best DPS, his sync is atrocious.  Without SEUN, we’re talking on the level of Blarcanine.  With it, he’s closer to SS Hilda, but it’s a lot to ask.  And his setup is atrocious.  1MP move that gives +2 offenses and +1 crit, +1 sync cooldown, but then cuts defenses by -1.  The 1MP is what kills me.  MP Rekindle is supposed to be the saving throw, allowing him to be fully self-sufficient over time.  But there’s the rub.  Over time.  CS does not give you time.  You need to hit them right now.  And it’s kinda wild to me that Leon ever caught on, given that CS was the first mode.  This can be somewhat excused in Gauntlet, but CS is having none of it.  And this is an era before the Sp Atk/Crit buffers came along.

I think this accounts for how long SS Red remained the fan favorite.  Leon’s DPS was way better, but in a category where that improvement wasn’t necessary, and only under specific conditions.  And in absence of those conditions, he’s just like SS Red, but with infinitely worse self-setup.  And truth be told, this issue is not rectified.  Fire is an easy type to shop for, and Leon doesn’t exactly provide anything groundbreaking.  It’s fairly sad that the bigger selling point is almost his Flying DPS.  Really tells you something about Flying types.  But realistically, the self-setup remains his biggest problem.  Anni Lillie may not be top DPS anymore with SS Korrina, but her immaculate setup sets her apart.  Unless Leon receives similar boons, I imagine he’ll always kinda lag behind.

EX and Move Level? Neither is necessary.  Leon lives and dies by his base skills, and Inferno spam in particular.  You need nothing else.  His grid can offer a 30% multiplier to move damage and a 50% multiplier to sync when a foe is burned, but I don’t consider it strictly necessary.

Team 1: Leon, SS Morty, Lucian/Anni Raihan Just because SS Morty isn't ideal doesn't mean we can't make it work.  In fact, if you have 3/5 Morty and take the extra Team Gimme Five node on grid, Leon can cap out his offenses with one MP Burst, so it's possible.  All you add in is some special defense dropping.  Lucian is, as always, my ideal man, hitting AoE and boosting team speed.  Though Anni Raihan is very worth mentioning, with his own Fire-type Max move that actually does set sun, and potential for special defense debuffs on a trapped foe on his 3/5 grid.

Team 2: Leon, SS Brendan/P!Mallow, Blaine Thing is, I'm not really convinced this one works, but I'll try anything once.  Anti-Cobalion.  The main reason I bring this up in this particular structure is that SS Brendan can fix all of Leon's offensive needs instantly, and provides special defense drops alone.  Palentine's Mallow can also kinda do it, but is much slower about the whole thing, in exchange for better team defense.  Blaine just needs to add Sun for maximum Inferno damage.  The question is, can this one-shot Cobalion from half-HP?  And I'm gonna say no.  If it does, great, you've got yourself an answer.  But Cobalion becomes immune to burn halfway through Bar 2 unless you're evaporating it at once, so like...consider.  But hey, at least this answers Uxie?

Team 3: Leon, MU Torchic, Agatha Anti-Bulu. I mean, it's not like that's a particularly difficult thing to accomplish, but you know.  MU Torchic can buff Leon's offensive needs perfectly, while Agatha is your best sleep bot, capping her own speed and getting MGR9 on Hypnosis.  Leon’s Max Move can be used in Bar 3 to potentially just end a fight.

Final Thoughts I tried really hard, but couldn't figure out a team composition for Cresselia that didn't result in the same Haze/Snatch support that always gets used.  Piercing Gaze is supposed to be a big deal, but I don't think it does enough.

Ultimately, Leon's a pure Striker, with absolutely no frills.  He exists to spam his high DPS moves, and nothing else.  Which is all well and good.  But he's a Fire-type.  And Fire is the most saturated offensive typing you can imagine.  Like, did you pull SS Hilda?  Congrats, Leon is outright irrelevant.  She outdamages him, and has immediate turn 1 setup, with an actually good sync nuke.  SS May can get sync a whole turn early.  Anni N is having his rerun right now too, and has spread damage on his move, that also debuffs the foe each hit, AND he can get pep rally for better gauge control.  Leon's gauge control is awful.  Hell, Silver.  Silver may have bad DPS, but his sync nuke is unreasonably strong on-type and under Sun, and he's got reasonable self-setup now too.  What the hell do you need Leon for?

I know, initial Master Fair compared to more modern stuff, but I think it's wild that even on first release, the comparison to SS Red was not always favorable.  Sure his damage was higher, but so were his demands, and I feel like he's in a really awkward spot now.  Gigantamax could have, and should have, added a ton to him.  But instead of a really valuable trap effect, they gave him something that I doubt will add up to more than a couple hundred damage in a match.  He's...fine. Good enough to perform, but not good enough that I feel like he does much you can't do elsewhere.

[thelocalconstellation]

I'm gonna LOSE MY MIND why has my dash been littered with posts about terfs or infighting in the queer community again or people just generally being shitty to other people online.

I promise you. It costs nothing for you to not be an asshole. No. Come back. Listen to me. Here are the life rules I play by. You can follow em if you want to.

1) You cannot be angry forever. I suppose you can, actually, there's just very little point to it. Also it makes you generally unpleasant. Life is in fact much nicer if you can tone down the grudge.

2) you can't be afraid forever. Not everybody in the world is Out To Get You. I promise. Nobody ever said that the things that are worth it will be easy or not scary.

3) Is what they are doing actively infringing on your safety and general wellbeing? Is it going to? And I do not mean are you going to have to be in the vicinity of something uncomfortable for a little while I mean are you going to be injured/killed/traumatized by this? No. Not maybe. Not could. A very determined goose could break into a hospital and unplug all the life support equipment. That does not mean it is going to, and it does not mean we have to kill all the geese. Calm down.

If the answer to the questions posed in number 3 is no, fuckit. Let em do whatever. The fun of being a sentient being includes getting to play the daily game of fucking around and testing if we get to find out. Let em find out.

Rule three boils down to Do what you want, forever and ever (provided that you are ensuring that others are also answering no to the above questions.)

4) Take responsibility for your actions. As said in 3, fuck around, find out. It's how we learn! But y'know. If you play stupid games (fork in electrical outlet) you're going to win a stupid prize. (Explosion)

5) no, the world isn't fair. No, the world isn't nice. You don't need to be either. You should still be expected to play civil. It's known as the act of learning when to keep your mouth shut. No, you don't need to give the homeless guy spare change. It'd be nice, and you might be making the world a little more fair, but the least you can do is not harass them.

6) do not attribute to malice what could simply be stupidity. Every single person on this earth has a list of stupid shit they've done. Yes that includes you. If somebody does something that drives you up the wall, there are a few options that do not include it being an action they took Specifically to piss you off. I repeat. The rest of the world is not out to get you.

7) when shit does hit the fan, you are allowed to be upset about it. Doesn't mean you're allowed to be an asshole about it.

8) fuckit, we ball. Nobody knows what's going on at any given moment. There is no manual to adulting. There is no instruction booklet for life. If you don't know what's going on, fuckit, we ball. Roll with it for now, avoid any big rocks on the path, fuckit. More often than not, it's really kinda not worth the hassle.

9) life is too short to spend being an asshole. If you want to dedicate your life to being a little hater, feel free, but it's just sad dude.

As for an end note, I am consistently surprised by the point of being human constantly being used to say why the shitty systems we find ourselves in won't change. I dunno how to explain this but we have opposable thumbs, creativity, and resources. Wouldn't it be cool if we could stop fighting for a hot second and go to space instead. We can defy gravity and put a man on the moon, we can tap away on a funny little screen and instantly send a message to somebody across the world, we can backtrack so hard from putting a hole in the ozone layer. I am suggesting that next on our list of cool shit, we start calling people who are intent on keeping this discrimination circus going cowards. The only reason to deny human rights, to deny a fair wage, to deny people bodily autonomy, to fail to be at least a little more environmentally conscious is cowardice and pride. Like. What do they think is gonna happen if they don't buy a 73rd yacht and pay their employees fairly? Oooo noooo they're gonna buy a carton of eggs, god forbid they save up enough to pay rent?

Also the bible is a book written several hundred years ago and has been translated 70 million times. As far as I'm concerned, human bias is inescapable. If it's not the purest form of it capable of existing then you are not reading the word of god you're reading the word of a man with a shiny hat who had people whipped for wearing a colour beyond their social rank.

[ella-ashmore]

🎶

For that one ask game gimme a song bestie I wanna know more about your music taste

bat out of hell by meat loaf

"nothing ever grows in this rotting old hole / everything is stunted and lost / and nothing really rocks and nothing really rolls / and nothings ever worth the cost / and i know that im damned if i never get out / and maybe im damned if i do / but with every other beat ive got left in my heart / you know id rather be damned with you"

[romanoffsbish]

So Sorry

Natasha Romanoff(G!P) x Fem!Reader

•~~~~~~~~~~~~~•~~~~~~~~~~~~~• (Past)

———————————————— (Lyrics)

TW: Allusions to sex/mentions of body parts.

She Used to be Mine (Part 1)

Broken (Part 3)

Natasha had attempted to sleep, as her body genuinely ached from her mission, but between the distraught babies, her aching heart, and her racing thoughts she'd gotten maybe fifteen minutes.

———

Natasha was pretty certain she was being punished for all of her lifetimes worth of transgressions. After countless hours spent trying to calm the wailing infants, Natasha was at a loss; she found herself crying along with them, as no amount of cooing, or rocking was helping. It was obvious they missed their mommy, and she couldn't blame them because she was in the same boat, but they were distracting her from the only real solution—finding and saving you...

The babies cries were breaking her heart, as she wandered aimlessly around her apartment to find anything left behind by you to soothe them. She'd wandered into what used to be her office, halting at the sight of the completed nursery, and a steady flow of tears made their way down her cheeks.

•~~~~~~~~~~•~~~~~~~~~~•

"Natty..." You whine, as you dramatically thrash around in her bed.

She turned away from her paperwork on her desk to face you, face softening as she sees your adorably pouting face.

"Yes, detka?"

"You said if I came over to your apartment that we could cuddle..."

"I know, just give me five more minutes to finish this packet. Hill dropped it off right after I'd invited you over..."

She watched in slight amusement as your face contorted, pout deepening, as a hint of jealousy flashed across your eyes.

"Yeah, I'm sure she did." You huffed, then turned away from your girlfriend, not wanting her to see just how upset you'd gotten.

Natasha swiftly abandoned the paperwork in favor of quelling your obvious insecurities, feeling your obvious change in mood.

"Detka..." She whispers, as she crawls into the bed from behind you, and her heart twinges with guilt at the sound of a light sniffle.

"Oh sweet girl, you have to know you're the only one for me.." She coos, as she places a kiss to the nape of your neck, and wraps her arm around your waist.

"I'm not sure that I'm enough for you Natty..." You humorlessly chuckle out, while fiddling with her fingers that are draped over you, and silently cursing yourself for crying over something as trivial as her ex delivering her paperwork.

"Hey, little dove, please don't talk about my precious angel like that.. You're more than enough, far more than I'd ever deserved."

You rolled around to face her, shaking your head in dismissal of what she said, and she leaned down to kiss at your wetted cheeks.

"You make me want more than I've ever wanted with anyone else. They were all just lessons learned, stepping stones on my road to you."

"So cheesy..." You giggle out, and she smiles widely down at you, then pecks your lips.

"You, moya lyubov', you're all I want. With you, I see a future full of love."  She continues on, as her finger taps your chest for emphasis.

"Really?"

"Of course..."

"What all do you see?" You ask, shaking with anticipation.

She gently pushes you to your back, then moves her body atop of yours, and settles her head directly atop your chest, over your heart, and your arms wrap around her instinctually.

"Well, first, I see us getting engaged, in the cheesiest way possible. I'll make sure Lena's there so she can gag over it."

You chuckle, and your heart soars at the redheads apparent plans.

"Bold of you to assume I'd say yes." You playfully mumble, and she lifts her face to gaze at you with a quirked brow, then tucks back in.

"Anyways... Then comes the wedding, that I'll make Tony cover the costs for, because he owes me and I just want you to have nothing but the best. After the wedding, I'll take you to travel the world, then by the time we'd come back, our dream home will have been built. We'll live off the land, a few acres away from Clint, and then we'll start our family. Adopt a few fur friends, then spend all of our free time bumping nasties until we have a baby of our own."

"Bumping nasties? How romantic..." You groan in faux disgust, and she props her chin up on your chest to smirk up at you.

"Sorry, make love..." She playfully condescends, then crawls up to place a firm kiss to your lips, then pulls back to stare down at you with loving eyes as she finishes off her speech.

"I can see it now, you'll be waddling around the house, while I'm working to put the nursery together. I'll make Yelena and Clint help with the furniture, while Wanda and I paint the walls a neutral color and cover it in animals. There will be examples of our love all over, reminding our future babies just how coveted this family is. It'll be perfect detka, we just got to get through a few more years of Avenging and making espressos..."

"I'd love that..." You mutter through your tears, and she litters your face with kisses, until she eventually lands upon your lips for a brief moment.

She swiftly wraps her arms around you, flipping your bodies, pulling you into her chest, then pulling a blanket over your bodies.

"Let's nap lyubov'." She whispers, then places a kiss to your forehead.

•~~~~~~~~~~•~~~~~~~~~~•

After moving over the heartache at the sight, she'd started looking for anything to help her as the crying had ceased to stop.

"Mama's trying here, I'm so sorry..."

She eventually stumbled upon the swings in the closet, then she decided to clean the infants up. She placed them into one of the cribs, then collected a massive amount of products. She started by giving them a sponge bath on the changing table, one by one, before using the lavender lotion on them in an attempt to calm them.

"Hey there little guy..." She coos, as he stares up at her with wide eyes.

"I'm your mama, you didn't get to meet me yet because I'm a big old dummy, but I'm here now..."

She placed a kiss to his cheek, wiping his cheeks of residual tears, then swapped him out with his sister, as she repeated the process.

"You're a feisty one." Natasha chuckles as she stares down at her, she might look like her redheaded mother, but she’s definitely got your attitude.

Your daughters face never wavered as she glared up at Natasha, clearly taking after her in the field of trusting others. The middle of the night bedtime routine tore her walls down though, as her eyes began to droop with every move of Natasha's hands as she rubbed the lotion into her skin.

"I know you miss mommy, I do too... but I promise you I'll do everything I can to bring her back to us. We'll get to be a family."

Upon dressing both up in fluffy onesies, she'd taken them to the living room, and set their whining forms in the playpen while she warmed up some breast milk for them. After feeding, she had placed the twins into their swings that she brought out with her. They started to cry slightly, so she got the idea to lightly cover them in your unwashed tshirts, and that seemed to do the trick in finally getting them to calm down, and to eventually fall sleep.

Then she started a pot of coffee, and took a moment to revel in the silence. It didn't last long though, as she quickly moved to call in a team of reinforcements.

"Natasha? It is three in the morning, what could you possibly need? Shouldn't you be getting reacquainted with your future bride?" Yelena groans, then quips suggestively.

Natasha sighs, and Yelena tenses on the other line as she utters two words:

"Code Widow."

"I'll be there in five."

Natasha then texted Tony, and Wanda letting them know that she's in desperate need of cashing in her favors with them. Not shockingly, the both of them replied with no time to spare, it seems all the Avengers collectively suffered from insomnia, and more so, all of them loved you whenever you'd been around.

•~~~~~~~~~~•~~~~~~~~~~•

"Detka, are you ready?" She asked you, as the both of you stood before the Avengers tower.

"You mean to meet your family? The same family that also happens to be a badass team of superheroes that saves the world together? Yeah, of course, I'm totally ready, and not at all freaking out."

She chuckled, then spun you until your front was flush against hers, and leaned in to peck your lips.

"Sweet girl, you have nothing to worry about... They're quite literally just a group of goofballs, and Wanda, nothing intimidating about them at all."

"One of them literally turns into Shrek on steroids if you upset him, and you told me he'd had that crush on you..."

"Yeah, maybe don't call him that..." Natasha says through her laughter, then continues on.

"Also, that crush was surface level, it was over once he found out I didn't like men, and had a dick of my own." She boldly states, and you cringe at her crassness.

"What if they don't—."

"I'm going to stop you right there, they're going to absolutely love you detka. Now, let's go." She affirms, as she tightens her grip on you and pulls you towards the common room.

—

You'd all been enjoying a casual flow of conversation, as everyone took the time to get to know more about you, when Tony's face suddenly lit up with mischief.

"So, Y/N, what mind control did you use to make Natasha this happy? We could use someone with powers like yours on the team." Tony asks, taking a jab at the obvious difference in Natasha's behavior whenever you're around, or brought up, to when she's alone with them.

"Well, for starters, I'm not a pretentious billionaire, with a beard and mustache that barely connects, who for some apparent reason can't bother to wear a better cologne then a variant of Old Spice." You nonchalantly state, as the Captain chokes on his tea, and your girlfriends lips quirk into her signature smirk.

Tony gasps, as he playfully clutches at his chest, but before he could retaliate, you continue on.

"I'm also incredibly easy on the eyes and an amazing lay." You nonchalantly add, and the group of men's faces turn varying shades of crimson, and you smirk over the glass of lemonade Wanda had given you.

"That you are, and so much more." Natasha coos, then pulls you into her lap for a bruising kiss.

"Okay, ladies, we're still here..."

"Just because you can't manage to get any, doesn't mean you're allowed to cockblock Rogers..." Natasha grumbles against your lips, never once pulling away.

You giggle in response, and throw your face into her neck as they seemingly become uncontrollable. Said giggles subside rather quickly though as you move ever so slightly and you can feel her hardening beneath you.

"God, I love you two together so much! It's also so nice to have another girl around here." Wanda chuckles out, as she quickly hugs you both, then takes off towards the kitchen.

"I'm going to have to agree, Y/N, you seem rather fun. I can't wait for you to come to a Stark party." Thor boasts, as he also takes his leave, with a squeeze to your shoulder.

"Hurtful comments aside, I can already see us getting into quite some trouble together... Welcome to the family, kid." Tony mutters with a smirk and his gaze locked with the assassins.

"Back off, she's mine Stark." Natasha growls, and he winks your way, as he throws his arms up in surrender, and takes his leave with the quiet Bruce Banner following closely behind.

"It was lovely to finally meet you, I'm elated to know that Natasha's finally found someone that makes her this happy." Steve says, still blushing, as he holds his hand out for you to shake.

"See, I told you they'd love you..." She whispers against your ear, as she moves to place suggestive kisses along the side of your neck, while also tracing her fingers dangerously up your thigh.

"Yeah, I just had to put their leader in his place." You chuckle out, and she chuckles against you.

"Detka, Captain Spandex, and the retired Playboy might think they're in charge, but we both know who's really calling the shots." She playfully states, as she hungrily stares into your eyes.

"Yeah, who's that?" You whisper against her lips, as you've moved to straddle her lap, and slightly grind into her.

"Well, while they have their little battles over the title, mommy's usually the one actually getting shit done." She lowly growls, then slams her lips to yours, and grips you up by your thighs.

Running off towards her room with urgency, smirking to herself as you giggle against her shoulder—music to her ears.

•~~~~~~~~~~•~~~~~~~~~~•

After the news of the breakup spread about the tower, they'd all been relatively shocked, and with little information given, the guys decided to give you ample bouts of space. Wanda had been on the mission too, or else she would've probably been there every step of the way...

Clint, ever the retired archer—he'd talked to you a handful of times, but you'd clearly pulled one over on the man. Never once did you inform him you were with child, nor in mortal danger with her greatest enemies, and he never picked up on it. Natasha had entrusted him to keep in subtle contact with you, and his kids love for you was always an easy excuse for him to have a reason to call you.

"Hello?" Clint groggily mutters into his phone, with his eyes glued shut, having only known who was on the other line based on the ringtone.

"Clint..." She shakily gets out, having instantly lost her resolve at the sound of her best friends voice.

"Tash, what's wrong?"

"Dreykov's back from the dead… She's gone... You're an uncle..." She relays, pausing with each statement, as she tried to get herself together.

"Be there in a little over an hour..." He cooly states, then she hears as he stumbles out of bed to get dressed.

———————————————————

I'm sorry… Two words I always think… After you've gone

When I realize I was acting all wrong, so selfish.

Two words that could describe, oh actions of mine…

———————————————————

Natasha took a massive swig of her coffee, letting the bitterness consume her tastebuds, while she anxiously waited for all parties to emerge. She carefully listened for the stairs, wanting to avoid the disturbance of the exhausted infants.

Yelena, true to her word arrived within five minutes, since she only lived in the complex across the way. Natasha quietly swung the door open, with her finger to her mouth, just before she could slam it open herself.

Yelena initially thought the place was bugged, but upon entering she saw the tiny sleeping humans, and lightly gasped.

"Oh my gosh, did you shrink Tony and Wanda?" She whisper shouts, almost sounding serious, as she looks up to Nat with curious eyes.

"This is no time for jokes..."

"I wasn't—." Yelena shut up once her sister glared her way.

"So, dear sister, it appears that I got Y/N pregnant the night I regretfully left her, and then our collective past caught up to me while I was away, and now she's paying the ultimate price for it."

"I-I'm an auntie?" Yelena asks, with unshed tears in her eyes, as she stares at your peaceful infants as they sleep, and her heart all but shatters at the news of your whereabouts.

"Yeah..." Natasha confirms with her head hung low, tears once again falling down her face.

"My vernem yeye, obeshchayu." Yelena matter of factly states, as she pulls her sister into her embrace, allowing Natasha the fleeting moment to freely break down before the others arrive.

(We'll get her back, I promise. )

"My dolzhny." She mutters, as she stares over her sisters shoulder with a protective stare falling directly onto her niece and nephew.

(We have to)

•~~~~~~~~~~•~~~~~~~~~~•

"Detka, I'm home!" Yelena shouts, then you hear her groan, knowing that Natasha's "knocking some sense into her."

"Welcome home, dorogoy." You shout back, using one of the many pet names Natasha uses on you in an attempt to assist her in riling your lover up.

"What? I didn't even do anything that time?" Yelena grumbles, and you enter the room with your arms wide open, while laughing at the sight of the sisters wrestling on the floor.

Yelena jabs her sister in the stomach, then launches up into your embrace, wrapping her arms around you then spinning you both in circles. Natasha regathers her bearings, then keeps a neutral face at the sight, while internally her heart soars at the bond you share with her little sister.

"Okay, enough, put my girlfriend down." She commands, practically yanking your giggling form from Yelena's arms, and pulling you into hers instead.

"Oh, get your panties out of the bunch." Yelena playfully remarks, and you cringe at her incorrectly translated euphemism.

"I made lunch." You pipe up, interrupting their staring contest, as you wiggle out of Nat's embrace.

"Come get your mac and cheese while it's hot." You shout, laughter erupting from your chest as Yelena whizzes by you with her to go hot sauce in hand.

"Vykhodi za menya"

(Marry me)

"What was that?" You ask, while sliding her bowl in front of her.

"Repeat in English, and you'll no longer be able to speak again..." Nat rigidly relays, as she protectively pulls your backside flush against her, and you can only assume glares down at her sister.

"You two will be the death of me..." You chuckle out, and just turn in your lover's embrace, and lean into her warmth.

•~~~~~~~~~~•~~~~~~~~~~•

Yelena's leg bounces, while she sits on the couch and watches over the babies, as the anxiety that you'd been right all those years ago floods her mind. Natasha's taking a shower, while the others slowly trickle in, and she enters the living room to see her closest friends sat before her sleeping babies. Normally the sight would warm her heart, but she's moved into 'Black Widow' mode.

"They're absolutely gorgeous, Nat." Clint states, as he sadly smiles up at her, trying to cut through the tension.

"So, is Laura available to keep them while we storm the world in search of Y/N?"

"Nat.."

"No! We're going to save her, and I want it done yesterday." She angrily mutters, and Yelena reaches up to put a hand to her shoulder.

"Sestra, calm down, and try to think clearly. The red room is methodical, and we don't have the Melina-Alexei avenue anymore, so we have to be strategic."

Natasha knew she was right, but it didn't lessen the urgency thumping in her chest.

"Nat, I know you have to have a tracking device of sorts."

"Already checked, they're using something to interfere with it, as I doubt they removed it from her neck."

The group goes over plans to execute, and for now Natasha agreed to leave it to Tony, and Yelena to find you. Tony already transmitted all data available to Friday, and Yelena's contacted some of her contacts from when she'd worked for Valentina.

Wanda's offered to look into the twins memories to see if there's anything she can gather. Natasha was rather hesitant, but after some pushing she was in; she'll agree to just about anything to get you back to them. Plus, whenever Wanda's entered her mind—besides in the battle with Ultron, it's been nothing more than a tickle.

"The subconscious is a rather interesting place, since they're so young, it's even plausible we'll be able to hear their perspective from in utero." Tony pipes up, further solidifying Natasha's choice to allow it.

Wanda gets comfortable, sighing in an attempt to rid her body of anything remotely negative. Then she enters Nikolai's mind, Natasha freezes when his face twitches, but she instantly settles back into the couch when his face calms.

•~~~~~~~~~~•~~~~~~~~~~•

"Nice try, but I don't negotiate with the captives."

"Listen, if you want her to suffer, then you'll take only me. Allow me the next six months to have them, then after she returns from her year long mission, I'll leave them on her doorstep. The mere thought of knowing she could've had a family, had she not left, will be enough to break her. Then knowing that her plans to keep me safe also went out the door. Trust me, if you aim to crush her, then you'll do exactly as I said."

"Why should I trust you? You clearly love her, what's your motive here?"

"Well, Natalia broke me, left me behind to clean up the mess she made of my heart, and never once took my feelings into consideration. Then, there's the fact that without her I'm nothing, so if protecting these babies is the last thing I do, then so be it." You dejectedly mutter, watching as he walks away and directly out of the room with no response.

—

“Mommy’s precious girl, you look so much like your mama, it’s actually insane… You guys are going to be best friends, I can totally see it… Mama’s girl, and mommy’s boy…” You coo, as you sit before their tiny bodies, as you seem to he putting together a scrapbook.

“This is your auntie Lena, I’m sure you two will get into loads of trouble with her, I’m counting on you two to not drive your mama crazy though, because I won’t be there to keep her sane. Lena and Tasha have always been very reactive when they’re together.” You chuckle out, and they can see the tears you’re fighting back, as you are putting their individualized boxes together.

“I hope you two take after them, and always take care of each other. Protect each other from all the bad in the world, and love with all your hearts, but never be too trusting either. Your mommy will teach you all about how to have your guards up, but don’t let that same guard keep you from a life worth living.”

Your son started to pout, then your daughter empathized and copied him, so you’d placed everything aside, and moved to hover above them.

“Mommy loves you both so incredibly much, and if I am doomed to never see you again, I hope these videos fill whatever void I leave behind. No amount of time with you two will ever be enough for me though. You’ll be okay though, because your mama is going to love you so well, she’d always done so for me.” You shakily get out, before placing kisses to both of their cheeks, then scooping them up.

—

"Agent Y/L/N."

"Why are you at my place?"

"We noticed you're ridding this place of all your belongings, just wanted to make sure you're not stupid enough to run."

"Well, I'm obviously just cleaning up shop, now get the hell out of here, I still have two weeks before I've lost all my autonomy."

"That mouth of yours, lose it before your time with us comes, see you soon beautiful." The creepy man commands, as he drags his hand across your jaw.

•~~~~~~~~~~•~~~~~~~~~~•

Wanda can feel the disgust radiating off your body, as your son practically absorbs the energy. She didn't get anything of substance, but it at least allowed them some insight on what's been happening.

Natasha's jaw clenched as she heard it all, then it remains locked as she has to hear as Wanda described the anxiety your fetuses felt when Dreykov practically baited you with them.

The widows see right through him, knowing his goal from the start was to have just you, but he, ever the sadist, wanted you to plead for it to be that way. Your children were of no use to him, as they’d require far too much attention, as he waits for the young girls to be at least toddling before he collects them.

Your words cuts straight through Natasha's heart, practically splitting it in two, and even though she knows it was a tactic to protect the babies, she also knows it's true.

She vows to hold you close, and never let go again once you’re back in her arms. You two will move far away and start your life together…

———————————————————

When patience is in short supply

We don't need to say goodbye

We don't need to fight and cry

Oh we, we could hold each other tight tonight

We're so helpless. We're slaves to our impulses

We're afraid of our emotions

And no one knows where the shore is

We're divided by the ocean, and the only thing I know is

That the answer isn't for us… No the answer isn't for us

———————————————————

You're currently lying in the same bed, losing track of time, as you haven't exactly left the cell and have no access to the sun since you're submerged in a constant state of pitch black. Your one meal a day is the only way you’re really staying aware of time, as you scratch marks into the wall.

You’d expected Natasha to have already broken the doors down, but you’re starting to wonder if she’d moved on from you in the year you were separated.

Were those flowers and chocolates for a new girlfriend?

The thought breaks your heart further, and now you just imagine her mystery girlfriend holding your babies close as if they were hers. Your stomach turns at the thought, causing you to abruptly launch up, leaning over the bed, as you begin throwing up the contents of your stomach. Your throat burns as most of what came up was acid, your stomach aches at the empty feeling, and your heart follows suit.

Sobs somehow wrack your dehydrated body for the tenth day in a row, the hope of ever seeing your babies again slowly dwindling, your spark was slowly fading out, and your will to fight was nonexistent.

———————————————————

I'm sorry. Two words I always think. Oh after you've gone

When I realize I was acting all wrong

We don't need to say goodbye.

We don't need to fight and cry

We, we could hold each other tight tonight

Tonight, Tonight, Tonight...

———————————————————

Yelena had heard through the grapevine that they actually weren’t sure what they were doing with you yet. Locations were never ever disclosed, so she was at a loss for finding you. All she could do was to plead with the powers that be that you’re somehow doing okay, that you’re strong enough to withhold the torture just long enough until they find you.

Natasha was breaking more by the day, she’d attempted down avenues of her own, but they all ended with nothing. So instead, she came up with a open ended plan for what to do once she’d finally found you. Clint and Wanda stayed with her, helping with the babies, and being at the ready for whenever Tony’s technology found you.

Tony was quick to get to work, but it proved rather fruitless for awhile, and after a painfully long three weeks, he'd finally gotten a hit off of Natasha's failing tracking device.

They'd found you…

Budapest, the nightmarish hellhole of her past…

——————————————————————

4,580 Words

Taglist(Tagged all who commented)

@d14n4ol @wandaspov @inlovewithfaberry @fxckmiup @yeux-sur-la-lune @battleg03 @youralphawolf72 @erinheartmilfs @beenicejoy @lissaaaa145

Here you go, a part two with a cut off for an already being worked on third / final part.

—So Sorry—Feist—

[sirisuorionblack]

James the mother hen

James Potter x Hufflepuff!Reader

Requested - dude hi!! could you maybe do james potter x hufflepuff reader where the reader plays quidditch and gets hurt during a gryffindor v hufflepuff game and he feels really guilty about it and is really overbearing because he wants to help her feel better? or maybe just a sick day fic where james is helping her lol i’m just a sucker for mom friend worried james. thank you!!

Warning - Minor injuries

Authors Note - This is my first time writing in second POV so, sorry if its not great. Hope you like @riddikulusweasleys! 

“Hey, prongs, look who is coming,” Sirius dragged his syllables at the last word, looking at his best mate with a wide smirk on his face. 

James looked up from his single piece of toast - healthy breakfast before quidditch, he said when the rest three of them gawked at him - to Sirius, who was wiggling his eyebrows then across the great hall to spot you in your mustard quidditch robes, grinning as you walked toward him. 

Remus chuckled at his best friend whose hand immediately flew to his hair, making them even messier and adjusting his glasses, “Your drooling, mate,” 

“Well, I have every right to drool seeing she is my girlfriend,” James said cheekily, his focus slightly faltering from you towards his best friends rolling their eyes. 

“Hello, Mr Potter,” you greeted him, smirking.

“Hello, Ms (L/N),” he said, chuckling. 

“You two are weird,” Sirius muttered, looking between the two of you in disgust although his eyes held a shine.

“You're just jealous, pads,” Peter mumbled. 

“Hey!” Sirius glared at him and soon engaged in a nasty conversation that may or may not have cost the pumpkin juice. 

“You ready for the match?” you asked James, raising your eyebrows and smirking slightly.

James’ stomach suddenly churned anxiously. Now the matter is - he loved quidditch, he loved it more than anything but it was particularly hard for him to play against Hufflepuff ever since you became the captain of the quidditch team a year ago. You had always been a part of the reason why James loved quidditch, your moves and flexes made him much more drawn to you -smitten as Sirius would say- and one of the multiple reasons he finally mustered the courage to ask you out the start of the term.

You knew it, you knew how James felt playing against you, it was rather tough to play against...loved ones? Never have either of you actually muttered those three words to the other.

“Yeah,” James said, his voice cracking in between. 

You smiled softly, and winked, “Your gonna rock it,”

 The two of you after the conversation in the great hall only met at the quidditch pitch. 

“Shake your hands,” Madam Hooch said, motioning you and James to do so.

 A smile on both of your faces as your handshake was more than friendly compared to any other handshakes on the field. 

 The Hufflepuff and the Gryffindor teams were high up in the air, clenching the broom handles, waiting for the quaffle to release because this, after all, would determine the quidditch cup for the year.

Madam Hooch’s whistle echoed through the air as the quaffle was thrown to the players. The whistles and hollers of the crowd were so much that it almost made the players anxious. 

 “The Gryffindor captain first caught the quaffle. You're doing great Jamie boy!” The commentary was given by, of course, Sirius. He was appointed as the temporary commentator after the previous one had a major injury after very strict instructions given by Professor McGonagall. 

“Mr Black,” McGonagall warned. 

“Alright, alright. Minnie is getting mad,” he quickly added, “Oh, look at that. (L/N) has the quaffle, she is flying to the goal. Now, come on, let your boyfriend win, will you?”

You flipped him off with one hand as you flew through the forthcoming Gryffindor team players, diving and serving. 

“Woah! Hufflepuff scores one goal!” Sirius glanced at the parchment before him, “1-0, Hufflepuff to Gryffindor, very bad performance lions, I expected more,” he shook his head as though in pity.

“Mr Black, you're demotivating the players!” McGonagall warned.

“Sorry, Minnie,” Sirius apologized, not so apologetically, “Now, the quaffle is back with the Gryffindor chaser! Yay!”

You dashed to the chaser, circling around them and with one calculated, gentle push the waffle was back to your hands.

“Alright, ladies and gentleman can we give a big round of applause to my best friend’s one day, to be wife,” Sirius asked looking at the crowd expectantly and for his satisfaction, the crowd roared. 

Both James and you came to a halt on your brooms, a dark pink blush on your faces as the crowd roared even louder. But someone in the Gryffindor team had realised it was the best time to knock the quaffle out of your hold.

It was a great idea, you must give that to the red flash that passed by you but the way execution was worst. As the player swished past you, there was a harsh gush of wind and the player missed and had hit you on your elbow evidently knocking you out of your broom. Holding on the broom with one hand you dangled off it, trying to climb back on. 

As though it all were perfectly timed, a loose bulger was aimed at you by Merlin-knows-who and you lost the only balance you had that held you in the air.

The air around you felt colder as the blank spots danced dangerously before your eyes. Your boyfriend’s terrified face was what you saw last before losing your consciousness. 

 “Mr Potter, please stop fretting,” Madam Pomfrey said to James who paced before your bed nervously in the hospital wing, “Nothing is wrong with her,”

“Except?” He insisted.

“Except her ankle is broken,” She said calmly. 

“Broken!?” 

“Her ankle, Mr Potter!”

“It's still broken!”  

“Potter, if this continues I might ask you to leave the room,”

“When will she wake up?” James asked, ignoring Madam Pomfrey's threat. 

“‘M wake,” You mumbled and coughed. James rushed to your bed with some water. Madam Pomfrey sighed and left James to take care of you. 

“You alright?” James asked, taking your face in his hands and scanning every inch of them for him to admire and memorize your beauty with the reason as “checking for injuries”. 

“Yes, James, calm down,” You chuckled. 

“You scared me, did you know that?” James asked, sighing, "I'm sorry,"

"Why are your sorry?" You asked, placing your hands above his.

"I should have caught you or done something instead of Dumbledore at the final moment doing the spell," he looked down, pulling his hands out of your grip and holding your hands.

"James, you couldn't have done anything and it's okay. I am alright now, look," you pointed to your ankle that was heavily wrapped in gauze. 

You heard through your half consciousness Madam Pomfrey say to James that although Dumbledore had performed the charm to stay you afloat but you had hit the ground and broke your ankle.

James winced, "I'm going to ban whoever did that from the team,"

"James," you warned, "This is a game and that happens,"

He sighed, "I feel guilty, you know." He leaned towards the bedside table, fetching the blue potion Madam Pompfrey instructed him to give. 

“Mhm, figured it out,” you smirked.

“Drink,” James said, seriously and rolled his eyes.

You scrunched your nose in disgust looking at the blue semi-liquid potion, “No, that's-”  

“I don't need to hear it, just drink,” James said, looking at you pointedly. 

“Later?” You knew it wouldn't work but it was worth a try nonetheless.

“No,” he narrowed his eyes, “Come on, love, just gulp it,” 

With your nose still scrunched, you glanced at the potion warily. James sighed, moving closer to you and pressed his lips to yours, “Please,” he mumbled against your lips.

You huffed but obliged. Downing the nasty drink and trying not to distract yourself from the bitter taste, you pulled James once again into a kiss. 

After pulling away, James chuckled and blurted, “I love you,”

Both of your eyes widened in shock. You were the first one to regain your composure and grinned at him, “I love you too,”

“Well, it's about time!” They heard a voice very much like Sirius yell, crashes, grunts and then three people running. 

You chuckled, pulling James closer to you, “You're not gonna walk for another month with that broken ankle of yours,”

And true to his words, James carried a blushing yourself to the classes almost every day, you werent complaining though.

[mariocki]

Infinite list of favourite lyrics: 203/?

Meat Loaf - Bat Out of Hell (1977)

"I'm gonna hit the highway like a battering ram

On a silver-black Phantom bike.

Oh, when the metal is hot

And the engine is hungry

And we're all about to see the light.

Nothing ever grows in this rotting old hole

And everything is stunted and lost:

And nothing really rocks and nothing really rolls

And nothing's ever worth the cost!

And I know that I'm damned if I never get out

And baby I'm damned if I do,

But with every other beat I got left in my heart

You know I'd rather be damned with you.

Well, if I gotta be damned, you know I wanna be damned

Dancing through the night with you."

[spine-buster]

c a t c h i n g  t h e  l i g h t  |  elias pettersson

Summary: Eleven years into the future, Elias and Svea embark on their next adventure.  They have tackled everything together in life thus far with the other by their side.  Now, it’s time to add someone new.

Word Count: ~13k

A/N: I hope you all enjoy reading this epilogue to Elias and Svea’s story.  This style of small snippet scenes was so fun to write and I hope you like it.  This sort of acts as an update on Brock and Grace’s story 11 years into the future as well!  Regardless, I love these two so much.

CW: difficult birth

                                                             11 years later.                                                                        ___

“I’m ready,” Svea said one night when she and Elias were in the car alone, driving home from the Parkinson’s Foundation of British Columbia Gala that they’d been to every year for almost fifteen years now, hosted by Grace.  They were holding hands across the centre console.  

Elias knew he had to keep his eyes on the road since it was dark outside, but he made sure to look over at his wife.  It was so out of the blue that he knew exactly what she meant.  “You’re ready?” he asked, wanting to make sure he heard correctly.

She squeezed his hand gently as she nodded.  “I’m ready.”

>< >< >< >< ><

“So you guys are trying?” Grace asked as she sipped on her iced coffee in the quaint coffee shop in Yaletown.  She rocked Dukey in his stroller, now almost 18 months old and in his prime chubby glory, though he was already fast asleep and had been since the car ride in.  The kid could sleep, that was for sure.  It was a nice reprieve from all the sleepless nights he cost Grace and Brock at the beginning.

“Officially.  Yes,” Svea nodded her head.  She was already on special prenatal vitamins.  Already off her birth control.  Already monitoring her ovulation cycle.  Already had a checkup with her doctor to make sure everything was in order.  Already having sex with Elias nearly every moment of the day she could fit it in.  Not that either of them complained about that point.  Almost twelve years later of marriage and they were still insatiable for each other.  Elias still joked they had to make up for lost time.  “I’m not a fertile youngin’ like you were but I’m hoping it happens just as fast,” she commented.

Grace nodded her head.  “I’m just a baby-making machine at this point, so ask me any question you want.  You know nothing is off limits with me, or us.”

***

“Fill me up, Elias.  Fill me up with your cum.”

Elias groaned at Svea’s words.  He grabbed her hair and pulled her towards him so her back was flush against his chest, pounding into her at a different angle now as he felt close to his release too.  He licked and bit at the skin of her neck before dragging his lips up to her ear.  “You want my cum, pretty girl?”

“My pussy needs your hot cum, Elias.  Please.  Please.  Fuck me deep.  Fuck a baby into me.”

He snaked an arm around to her hot core and began rubbing at her clit, and after a few frenzied gasps and moans, Svea felt him explode inside of her, filling her up like she so craved and making her feel the greatest pleasure she had ever known.  Her orgasm coursed throughout her whole body and made her knees weak – literally – as they slipped further and further apart.  She would have almost fell back down face first onto the mattress if it wasn’t for Elias holding her up and letting her fall back onto his body instead.  As they lay on their bed catching their breaths, his cock was still inside her as it softened.  “Happy birthday, Elias,” she mumbled as she kissed him.  This was only round two, and they were planning to go all night.

***

“Are you serious?  You just went to the washroom like fifteen minutes ago,” Brock pestered Svea playfully as she stuck her tongue out at him, quickly walking into the washroom at the mall.

Elias was looking down at his phone.  Pregnancy symptoms, he’d googled.

Increased urination. You might find yourself urinating more often than usual. The amount of blood in your body increases during pregnancy, causing your kidneys to process extra fluid that ends up in your bladder.

***

“Svea, you love isterband!  You can’t get enough of it!” Elias protested.

“Did we get a bad batch?  It smells heinous.”

“It smells delicious!” he protested.  What she was saying was unbelievable to him.  Usually, she had to be told to stop eating the delicious Swedish style sausage, especially when they were back in Ånge or Sundsvall having it, and especially when it was a homemade variety.  But now she was making gagging noises.  

“I’m gonna go to our room until it’s done,” she said as she got up from her seat at the dining table.  Immediately, Stella got up and followed her.  “Call me when it’s ready.  Hopefully it will smell less heinous by then.”

Elias watched her and Stella walk away.  He took out his phone again and opened up the internet, still on the same tab from more than a week ago at the mall with Brock and Grace.

Food aversions. When you're pregnant, you might become more sensitive to certain odors and your sense of taste might change. Like most other symptoms of pregnancy, these food preferences can be chalked up to hormonal changes.

“Sveeeeeaaaaa!” he called out.

***

Svea was holding Elias.

She let him cry.  It was important to let him cry.  

His face was nestled onto her stomach, and had been there for at least fifteen minutes.  His arms were wrapped around her.  Every so often, she’d feel him move to kiss her bare skin, and she’d be able to feel the wetness from his tear-stained cheeks.  

“I’m so happy,” he mumbled.  He’d been saying that since they got home from the doctor’s office, but there was something about this time, right now, that made Svea’s heart swell a thousand times its size.  His tone, the softness, the tears, the position – everything was working in a way that made her so emotional.  “I’m so, so happy,” he repeated.

“Me too,” she whispered, running her fingers through his hair slightly.

“I’m going to be a dad,” he said.  He looked her in the eye.  “I’m going to be a dad and you’re going to be a mom.”

She nodded slowly.  

***

“So all the fucking worked, then,” Grace winked from the sink.

“You’re so crass,” Svea giggled as Dukey screamed at her for more food.  He already had a grape in each chubby hand and was eyeing the scrambled eggs on Svea’s spoon like it was a filet mignon.  She brought it towards him and he opened his mouth easily to eat it.  “But yes, it all worked.”

“I mean, you guys fuck all the time so I wouldn’t be surprised.  You guys still fuck like you’re in your twenties.”

“You’re really comfortable saying the f-word in front of your 18 month old.”

“He doesn’t understand words yet,” Grace dismissed her quickly, causing Svea to snort.

“And who are you to call me out?  Clearly you and Brock still fuck like you’re in your twenties too,” Svea whispered the word fuck, referring to Grace and Brock’s giant brood.  

“Are you guys going to find out what you’re having?” Grace asked.

Svea shook her head.  “We both want it to be a surprise.”

“It’s more fun that way,” Grace agreed.  “I’m betting on a boy.”

***

“Can you see it?” Svea asked as she looked at herself in the mirror, her body in a fitted dress.  She switched to a side profile to see if she could see her bump better.  It was small, and barely noticeable, but it was there.

“I can,” Elias nodded, coming up behind her.

“Do you think other people will see it?” she asked.  “I want to show it off.”

Elias smiled.  “Show it off?” he asked.  

Svea nodded.  “Grace said she think I’m going to be all belly – you know, like one of those women who just grows out instead of, like, around.  I waited so long to have one.  Now that I do, I want everyone to know.”

Elias’s smile overtook his face.  

***

“Look at you!” Grace winked as Svea approached her, her bump styled in a tight dress that showed off the small but noticeable curve forming.  “Work it, Svea!”  Svea danced a little bit, boogieing from side to side as Grace began to do the same.  Elias and Brock rolled their eyes at each other but smiled, too, their wives completely ignoring them at this point.  “I was right, too!  You’re all bump!” Grace exclaimed.

“For now,” Svea smiled.  “I feel wider.”

“You don’t look it, but it doesn’t matter.  Get as wide and as big as you want, woman.  You’re pregnant with a baby.”

“And ask Petey to go and get you cans of tuna in olive oil at 2:30 in the morning,” Brock quipped.  Grace shot him a look.  “Five times,” he added for dramatic effect.

***

“You want some, Elias?” Svea asked as she stuffed a spoonful of strawberry flavoured frozen yogurt into her mouth.

“I’m okay,” he shook his head, a small smile playing on his lips.  “You have what you want.”

“You sure?”

Elias nodded.  He looked over at the clock – 3:00 in the morning.  He had a practice tomorrow and she had work.  But she had to have some strawberry frozen yogurt.  She just had to.  She needed it.  Which is why Elias put on his winter jacket and a pair of shoes – but kept his pajama pants on – at 2:30 in the morning and made his way to their local 24-hour supermarket, buying her favourite frozen yogurt so she could eat it.  It was all worth it, now that she was digging into it – sitting cross-legged on the bed, belly showing through her pajama shirt, eyes rolling to the back of her head every time she ate a spoonful.  Now he realized what Brock meant.  “It’s okay, pretty girl.”

“Just one spoon,” she said, already scooping it.  She held it out to him and he smiled before he ate the spoonful.  “Is it good?” she asked.

He nodded.  “It’s better at three in the morning.”

She couldn’t help but giggle.  She had the best husband.  She wasn’t sure if others would have gone and gotten her frozen yogurt in the middle of the night.  “I love you, Elias.”

“I love you too.  Now give me another spoonful.”

***

“I love your cock so much Elias, fuck,” Svea sighed out.

He was much gentler these days.  They both were.  The doctor said it was completely safe and healthy but Elias was still…cautious.  But when Svea woke up that morning placing small kisses on his shoulder, and then reached over and slipped her hand down his pajama pants, he couldn’t help himself.  So he flipped around to face her, and they kissed, and kissed, and kissed, and he teased her already wet pussy with his fingers, and he hooked her leg over his torso and slipped into her easily, the both of them sighing, the both of them savouring the intimacy.

“Does it feel good?” he asked.  She nodded quietly.  “Does it feel different?”

“A little bit,” she nodded again, biting her bottom lip.  “But a good different.”

Elias thrust harder.  Svea let out a gasp.  “I could bury my cock in your pussy all day,” he huffed out.

That made Svea smirk.  “I’d let you.”

***

“You have to be patient.”

“I can’t be patient.”

“Well, you have to be.”

“You’ve been feeling them for a week now!  I haven’t!”

“Just.  Be.  Patient.”

“But Svea—”

“Elias—”

They both stopped the second they felt it.  It happened right where Elias’s hand rested on her growing belly.  He almost couldn’t believe it happened at first, because to him, the feeling was so new.  But when he realized what had just happened, and the magnitude of it, he looked up at Svea.  She was already smiling.  “Did you feel that?” he asked.

She nodded.  “Poke where they just kicked.  Trust me.”

Elias did as he was told.  He poked.  And poked again.  Then he placed his hand on the spot.

He felt another kick.

Svea could hear a sharp intake of breath.  When she looked at him next, he was already looking at her with tears welled in his eyes.  “Svea…” he managed to get out, his voice cracking.

“I know, Elias.  I know.”

A tear fell down his face.

***

“Svea, can I touch your belly?” Violet Boeser looked up at Svea, swaying her dress from side to side.

“Me too!” Rose Boeser joined in.

“Me three!” Lily Boeser pushed her sister to the side.  

“Me four!” Poppy Boeser squeezed her way in.  “Svea can I feel the baby?”

“Be gentle!” Grace called out from the picnic table.  In the distance, Brock and Elias were barbecuing the hamburgers and hot dogs.  Coolie, Milo, and Stella were all sunbathing near the barbecue.  “Svea isn’t a science experiment!”

Svea snorted.  “Yes girls, you can all feel the baby,” she smiled.  Immediately, each of the girls’ hands covered her bump.  Rose even put her head against her bump briefly.  “The baby isn’t kicking right now but they might soon now that they feel all your hands,” Svea said.

“Are you having a boy or a girl?” Violet asked.

“I don’t know yet, Violet!  It’s going to be a surprise.”

“Baaaaaaaa!” Dukey Boeser yelled from the picnic table.  Once Grace set him down, he ran over to Svea as well, not wanting to feel left out now that his four older sisters were doing something he wasn’t.  He put his tiny hands on top of Poppy’s and looked up at Svea.  “Baaaaaa!  Ba ba baby!”

“Yes!  There’s a baby!” Svea grinned.

“And I’m gonna babysit!” Violet said.

“Me too!” Rose followed.

“Me three!” Lily joined.

“Me four!” Poppy finished it out, like she always did.

***

“Your placenta is a bit low, but it’s nothing to worry about,” the doctor said as she looked at Svea.  “Have you been feeling any changes lately?”

“A lot more fatigue, to be honest,” Svea confessed.  “I push through it because I’m still working, but when I get home I, like, barely move.”

The doctor nodded his head.  “That’s normal.  Fatigue in the second trimester is common.  We’ll continue to monitor symptoms and monitor your placenta but it shouldn’t be a problem.  But if symptoms get any worse, we’ll put you on bedrest.”

“Bedrest?”

“Bedrest.  For your health.  And the health of the baby.”

***

“Should we start thinking about names?” Svea asked as she lay on the couch, her head in Elias’s lap as he ran his fingers through her hair.  Stella was sleeping in between her legs, letting out soft snores.  “Do we want super-Swedish or super…something else?”

“This is going to be the hardest part, I think,” Elias commented before offering any suggestions.  “I think something that translates well into both languages is best, don’t you think?”

Svea nodded her head.  Whereas Fanny and Emil chose pretty traditional Swedish sounding names for their three boys, she knew they’d have to go the “translatable” route because of their Canadian/Swedish lifestyle.  “Do you like Linnea?” she asked.

“I do, but I think it’s too popular in Sweden.  I want something nice but something that stands out.  There will be five other Linnea’s in her class,” Elias mused.

“So that’s Milo down the drain too, then…” Svea giggled slightly.  “What about Freya?”

“Too…mythological.”

“Ivar?”

“No.”

“What about Astrid?  I was going to be named Astrid, you know.”

Elias nodded.  “I like Astrid.  Astrid is good.  Do you like Oskar?”

Svea nodded.  “What about Erland, like your grandpa?”

“That’s a good middle name.”

***

Babysitting Violet, Rose, Lily, Poppy, and Dukey was good practice for Elias and Svea.  They’d been doing it, really, since Violet was born, and then when Rose was added, and Lily was added, and Poppy was added, and Dukey was added…well, it all just became routine.  The girls were great, and they put frilly headbands on Elias and did his makeup more times than they could count now.  His favourite look was the blue and green eyeshadow they’d created, stolen from mommy’s collection in her room.  The Canucks colours, obviously.  He’d even posted the finished product on Instagram.

The girls also never had any trouble with bedtime, even when they were much smaller.  But nowadays, Dukey did.  Entering his “terrible twos” was proving to be quite the interesting time.  But with the girls already in bed, it was easy for Elias and Svea to deal with him separately.  

After tiring him out, Elias tried rocking him to get him to fall asleep, but he was still fussy.  He kept reaching out to Svea.  So Elias transferred him over, and Svea held him in her arms.  “Whatsa matter?” she asked him in a sweet voice.  “Does Dukey want to fall asleep?”

He fussed around for a bit more before settling down, laying his head on Svea’s shoulder.  He was looking down, his face in a pout.  “Baby,” he said, pointing lazily down to her bump.  “Baby.”

“Yes, there’s a baby,” Svea cooed, rubbing his back.  His eyes almost immediately began to droop.  “But Dukey is a big boy now.”

“Yaaaaa.  Dukey big boy.”

Elias watched as she continued to rub his back and coo sweet words to him as Dukey fell asleep in her arms.  His hands were almost shaking, thinking about how in a few short months, they’d be doing the same thing for their own child.  

***

Midsommar.  Svea’s favourite time of year.

And now time for an impromptu baby shower.  

Elias’s family tradition of renting a big tent on the lake was still going strong, and now, with so many new cousins and family members, the party was bigger and better than ever.  Svea’s family and Elias’s family decided to incorporate a small celebration for the impending baby.

With her flower crown adorned on her head and some special gifts already opened, Elias sat down beside his wife and held her hand underneath the table.  “Remember when we were young?  What you did to me on the banks of the lake?”

She side eyed him.  “Don’t even think about it.”

***

“Give me your hands, Svea, fuck,” Elias moaned as he watched her rock back and forth on top of him.  She did as she was told, grabbing his hands to brace against so she could keep doing what she was doing.  As she rocked herself back and forth, getting closer and closer to her climax, she tightened her grip on his hands.  “Does it feel good, pretty girl?”

Svea nodded.  “D’you still like what you see?”

“Always Svea.  Always.”

***

Grace had gone all out.  She was the perfect person to host Svea’s Vancouver baby shower when she returned from Sweden almost double the size from when she left.  She’d invited the Canucks wives and girlfriends to her house.  She’d had her sunroom and backyard decorated in the most adorable Peter Rabbit themed décor.  Stella was dressed up with rabbit ears.  She’d even thought of the cutest, most perfect party favours – mini champagne bottles with “She’s About to Pop!” adorned on it.  And not the cheap champagne bottles, either.  This was Grace.

Too bad Svea couldn’t have any.

Svea usually didn’t like being the centre of attention, but she was having the best time being the centre of attention at her baby shower.  She opened her gifts, she played the games, she laughed her head off at the game where the girls had to measure her girth.  

After pictures with the guests, Svea sat down in her chair.  “This was the cutest baby shower,” Holly Horvat commented to her, nibbling on the last bit of her cupcake.  “But you know what?”

“What?”

“Remember that movie Bridesmaids?  Remember how they had puppies as the party favours?”

Svea giggled.  “Yeah.”

“Grace should have gotten us all cute little bunnies.”

***

“So the rumours are true.  You’re pregnant.”

Svea looked up from her phone to see Trevor waiting down the bar for his coffee, staring right at her as she finished telling the barista her order.  From behind her, one of her co-workers muttered an ‘Ew’ at the sight of him.  With good reason, since Trevor was Svea’s political arch-enemy.  They came up in the political world at the same time, got promotions around the same time, and were forced to work in conjunction with one another – but never actually together.  And they never got along, ever.

“Yes.  I am,” Svea nodded her head once.  “Fancy seeing you here, by the way.  Isn’t your office on the other side of town?”

“We travel all over the city,” he said.  His smarmy smile made her blood boil.  He grabbed his coffee and made his way towards her.  “Congratulations, by the way.  I wish Elias a lot of luck.  He’s going to need it.”

“Just like you after we decimated you in the election, I assume.”

His smarmy smile left his face.  

***

The Boeser girls got so excited by the flashing lights in the arena, the season opener in full swing.  They were clapping and screaming and jumping around on their jerseys as the announcer began to announce the team, knowing that their dad would be near the beginning because of his number six.

“At number six, Brrrrrroooock, Booooeeeseeerrr!” the announcer roared, the crowd roaring as well as the girls screamed at the top of their lungs for their dad.  Dukey was clapping too, balanced on Grace’s hip and in his own little jersey.  Svea couldn’t help but smile.  

Eventually, when they got to Elias, she knew the camera would pan to her.  A member of the press corps had seen her earlier.  And while she and Elias never made a formal announcement on Instagram or anywhere else in terms of her pregnancy, it was now out in the open – especially since that reporter asked about it during the media scrum earlier that day.  “Your wife Svea is pregnant now; is the focus at the beginning of this season for you on hockey or on the things happening at home?”  

The audacity of that question being asked made her head spin.

Lily had already wrapped her arms around Svea’s legs, and like clockwork, they were shown on the jumbotron clapping.  At that point, the 20,000-plus fans in the arena could see she was seven months pregnant.  The bump protruded through the jersey.  And when the fans realized, they got noticeably louder.  Like, louder louder.  Cheering, whistling, smiling – so much so it sent shivers down Svea’s spine.  

She smiled from ear to ear.

***

“Happy birthday, my beautiful wife,” Elias mumbled against Svea’s lips.  He’d been kissing her, slow and sensual, but also quick and fast – every type of kiss, really – for the last fifteen minutes.  He’d just made her a homemade dinner, and now he was ready for, uh, dessert.  

“This time next year I’ll be a mom to a ten-month-old,” she mused.

Elias smiled.  “It feels like just yesterday that we surprised Grace and Brock,” he said.  

“It’s been twelve years.”

“Still feels like yesterday,” Elias kissed her again.  “My moon, my stars, my Svea.”

***

“I think it’s cutting it too close,” Elias mused as they lay in bed together, Svea’s bump widening the distance between them.  

“Elias, I’m only thirty-six weeks,” Svea rationalized.  “My mom carried Sigrid to almost 42 weeks and me right to 40.  This baby isn’t coming out anytime soon.”

“But you’ve…grown so much in the last few weeks,” he said, laying a hand on the bump.  “And you’ve been so tired, and the doctor’s appointments have to be weekly because of that and I just don’t—”

“Elias—”

“It’s fifteen days, Svea.  I’ll just let them know it’s too close.”

“Elias,” Svea said sternly.  “You’re going to the East Coast and that’s that.  You’re going to get back and we’re going to celebrate your birthday and then we’re going to have this baby.  In that order.”

***

If you looked, if you really looked at the video, you could see Elias being called off the bench at the beginning of the third period.  

The announcers mentioned it after the fact.  And when play stopped about two minutes later, they were able to show the replay.  They went through some major points of his shift, spoke about how good it was, and then showed how he skated back to the bench and sat down.  About fifteen seconds later, someone came barreling through the tunnel and was screaming Elias’s name, waving him over to get off the bench.  Elias complied.  The analysts wondered – there was no hit, no scuffle, no trip, no high stick, no fall, seemingly no injury, no penalty at all or anything even worth a penalty during the play, and a perfectly healthy Elias Pettersson was being rushed off the bench?  What was going on?

The camera stayed on Elias speaking to the man in the tunnel.  Nobody could lip read but everybody could see Elias run down the tunnel once the man spoke.

“What’s wrong?  What’s going on?”

“You need to get back to Vancouver.  It’s Svea.  She’s been rushed to the hospital and she’s lost a lot of blood.”

He was a six hour flight away in Florida.  

***

There was blood everywhere.  All over their bed.  All over their sheets.  

Svea called an ambulance.  She called Grace screaming and wailing into the phone.  She called her mom in Sweden crying.  The pain was almost too much.  The contractions were too.  When the paramedics came, she was loaded into an ambulance and rushed to the hospital.  “My husband.  You need to call my husband.  He’s in Florida playing hockey.  He needs to be here.  He—He—the baby—the baby—the baby—”

***

It was the worst six hours of Elias’s life.  Eight hours really, from leaving the rink to getting off the plane and rushing to the hospital.  Grace called in the last minutes before the flight took off to update him.  Svea had placenta previa.  That’s why there was so much spontaneous blood loss.  The doctors had stopped the bleeding, but she’d needed a blood transfusion.  It went fine.  But now she was in labour.  At 37 weeks.

“It’ll have to be a c-section,” Grace explained.  “There was too much blood loss and too big a risk for more blood loss for a vaginal birth like Svea wanted.  And I don’t – Petey – she will probably need a hysterectomy.”

“Hysta-what?  What’s that?”

“They’re going to have to remove her uterus, Petey.  This baby is going to be your only baby.”

***

Elias rushed to put on the scrubs provided by the nurses.  He rushed to get back into the delivery room knowing that Svea had already had a blood transfusion.  He rushed to be in the room to watch the doctor operate – literally operate on his wife – so that Svea could deliver the baby safely and have her hysterectomy.

***

Margot Pettersson.

They named her Margot Pettersson.

After all the blood, the fear, the frantic phone calls, the six-hour flight, the surgery, the operation – Margot was here.  And she was healthy.  

It took everything within Elias not to break down crying as he held her in his arms and lay in the hospital bed with Svea, who was recovering well considering the trauma and how much blood she lost.  They couldn’t take their eyes off their daughter.  She was perfect in every way, from the blonde hair on her head to her tiny, tiny, tiny little toes.  

She was finally here.  

***

It was a few days later when Svea felt confident enough to be in a photo – she didn’t “look like death” anymore, as she put it.  Elias sent it to his teammates.  He was on some brief phone calls with the powers that be on the Canucks for a statement and for some time off.  

When he rejoined Svea in their hospital room as she fed Margot, he sat on the bed and wrapped an arm around his girls.  “The bed,” she said suddenly, looking at him.  “We have to buy a new bed.  I can’t sleep in that bed anymore.  All I’ll see is blood.”

“Grace and Brock already took care of it,” he said.  “Everything is going to be fine when we get back home.  I promise.”

***

The Vancouver Canucks organization would like to extend their congratulations to Elias and Svea Pettersson on the birth of their daughter, Margot.  Mrs. Pettersson continues to recover in the hospital.  Elias will be a healthy scratch for the next four games to ensure the health and well-being of his family.  

***

Svea was on bed rest in their new bed, Stella’s snout resting on her post-partum belly.  Elias never wanted to let go of Margot unless it was to put her back in Svea’s arms.  He couldn’t keep his eyes off of her, either.  Even when Svea was breastfeeding.  He found it to be the most beautiful thing in the world, watching his wife, who he loved so much, feeding and nourishing his daughter, who he loved so much.

He cuddled with them, snuggling into Svea’s side as he watched Margot.  The little sounds she was making brought a smile to his face.  He brought his hand up and caressed her head gently, the blonde hair atop her head perfectly combed.  

“I finally have boobs now,” Svea whispered.

Elias snorted and Svea had a cheeky smile on his face.  “I’ve always loved your boobs.  Big or small.”

“Hmm, don’t I know it,” she hummed, giving him another kiss.  She looked down at her daughter.  “She’s perfect, isn’t she?”

“In every way.”

***

Elias’s birthday was much quieter this year.  Well, quieter in the sense that there weren’t any friends in his house; quieter in the sense that he wasn’t at some hip restaurant downtown eating an incredibly expensive steak while sipping on an incredibly expensive glass of wine while he wore an incredibly expensive outfit and an incredibly expensive watch, watching his beautiful and sexy wife in an incredibly expensive dress sip sultrily on an incredibly expensive glass of wine as she eyed him up and grazed his leg with her heel under the table.  

But this was still his favourite birthday ever.

Sitting on the couch, a warm bottle of pumped breastmilk in his hands, feeding his eight-day-old daughter.

His life was perfect.

***

“She looks like Petey,” Brock said as he held a swaddled Margot in his arms.  

“They have to biologically, you know,” Grace jumped in.  “But my god you two, her eyes are so damn blue.  I mean I know that’s the Swedish thing and all, but they’re sooo blue.”

“I know,” Elias smiled.  “Even the doctor mentioned it during one of her checkups.  She’ll have a beautiful set of eyes, that’s for sure.  Just like her mom.”

Svea swooned.  She watched as Brock craned his neck down and placed a quick kiss atop Margot’s head.  “Getting baby fever again, Brock?” she winked at him.

“No no no, five is plenty,” he chuckled.  “I just love that newborn baby smell.”

Svea, Elias, and Grace let out the all-knowing “Oooooh” sound in agreement.  “You’re so right, babe,” Grace nodded.  “It’s the best smell in the world.”

***

“God, I missed this,” Svea said as she took a huge gulp of crisp, clean Vancouver air.  It was her first time outside with Stella in weeks, now that she was off bedrest and fully recovered from her c-section and hysterectomy.  Her doctor had okayed light physical activity, so she’d invited Grace and Dukey over for a short walk around the neighbourhood.  Grace had obviously agreed, and had brought Coolie and Milo along.  

“Me too.  You’ll be back running and doing yoga in no time,” Grace said, remembering some of their jaunts over the years where Grace would bring out Violet, or Rose, or Lily, or Poppy on walks or runs in their strollers too.  When she finished strapping Duke in, and made sure he had his snacks, she rose to her feet.  “You feel good?”

Svea nodded.  “We just have to go slow.  And I can do maximum half an hour.”

“I’ll go as slow as you want me to,” Grace said.  She peeked into Margot’s stroller and noticed she was already asleep.  Her son, on the other hand, was screaming about his grapes.  “Let’s hope Dukey’s grapes last the entire time.”

***

Did Elias and Svea go all out for Margot’s first Christmas?  Yes.

Did Svea dress her up in a red dress, green shoes, frilly headband, and reindeer antlers?  Yes.

Did Svea dress her up in an elf outfit, complete with curled shoes?  Yes.

Was there a portrait with the new family and Santa Claus?  Yes.

Did Elias and Svea send the pictures to their family members, co-workers, and every teammate?  Yes.

Did it get leaked to the media?  Yes.

***

“She’s gonna start her chubby phase soon,” Brock said as he held Margot in his arms, feeding her with a bottle, as Elias sautéed some mushrooms on a skillet as part of their lunch.  “She’s eighteen weeks now?”

“Yeah.”

“It’s the best,” Brock said.  “They got so chunky.  So squishy.  I swear I went crazy for every one of them.”

“Margot was born at 37 weeks though.  We might have to wait a little bit longer.”

“Well, call me the second you start noticing chunk,” Brock said.  “I’ll be over here in a heartbeat.”

***

“There was a lot of blood.”

Elias held Svea in his arms as they lay down in bed together after one of Margot’s middle-of-the-night feedings.  Margot had been really fussy and took a while to be put down and fall asleep again; Svea had been unable to go back to sleep herself once she was in bed, tossing and turning and not even being able to keep her eyes closed.  Even Elias’s cuddling wasn’t helping, which meant something was on her mind and keeping her restless.  So he’d asked her what was wrong.

And that’s what she responded with.

He knew immediately what she meant.  Ever since that day, when he was called off the bench and rushed back to Vancouver, he’d beaten himself up for not being there, as a husband should have been for his wife, as she went through such a traumatic event.  It traumatized him, but that didn’t even take into consideration how much it traumatized her.  That’s what really mattered here.  She still had to deal with it.  She still had to see it in her mind when she closed her eyes.  She had the memory, not him.  

It killed Elias inside knowing Svea had to carry that burden with her.  

“You were so strong, though.  And your strength gave us our daughter,” he said.

Svea nodded slightly before she looked at her husband.  “Were you scared?  When they told you, I mean.  When you were rushed off the bench.”

Elias nodded his head immediately.  “I was terrified.”

“Of what?”

“That I was going to lose you and the baby,” he admitted.  “Were you scared?”

“I was,” Svea said.  “Do you…are…are you angry we can only have one?”

“Why would I be angry?” he was beside himself at her question.

“I don’t know.  I just…are you angry we didn’t have a boy?  Or that we can’t have a son in the future?  Or another daughter?  Are you angry I wasn’t healthy enough to—”

“Stop it right now,” he ordered.  Tears were falling down his face at her words.  “You’ve given me everything I’ve ever wanted and needed in my life.  Do you understand me?  Everything.”

Svea was crying now too.  “You’ve just been so good to me, Elias.  I want to give you everything too, like you always give me.”

“You already have,” he whispered, kissing her, feeling her tear-stained cheeks on his.

***

“You want to hold the baby, Violet?” Svea asked quietly as the Boeser girls looked at tiny Margot resting in Svea’s arms.  Violet nodded her head desperately and outstretched her hands automatically.  “You have to sit on the couch, baby girl,” Svea said, and Violet did as she was told.

Svea extended her arms and passed Margot to her slowly.  “Put your arm up,” she said.  “You have to support her head.”  Violet nodded.  Margot fussed a little bit, but once she was in Violet’s arms, she stopped.

Violet smiled.  “Hello Margot,” she said in a soft voice, smiling.  

“Hello Margot,” Rose mimicked in the same voice.

“Hello Margot,” Lily mimicked in the same voice.

“Hello Margot,” Poppy mimicked in the same voice.

All at the same time, the girls leaned forward and placed light kisses onto Margot’s face.

Svea couldn’t help but smile from ear to ear.

***

“Look at my beautiful baby girl,” Elias cooed as he finished changing Margot’s diaper, buttoning up her little onesie as she wiggled on the change table, looking up at him with her big blue eyes.  “Hällo Margot!  Hällo!”

She gurgled happily.  Elias chuckled as he finished the last of the buttons, eventually scooping her up in his arms carefully and holding her against his chest.  She settled in quickly, calming herself down as Elias walked from her nursery to his bedroom.  Just as he walked in, Svea walked out of their ensuite bathroom with a robe on, drying her hair with a towel.  When she saw her husband and daughter, she smiled automatically.  

“Hello my loves,” she whispered, approaching them slowly.  At the sight of Svea, Margot gurgled happily again, even waving her arms up and down once excitedly.  “Hello Margot!  Hello my beautiful baby!”

“Beautiful baby had a stinky diaper this morning,” Elias griped jokingly.  

Svea laughed, placing a light kiss on top of Svea’s head.  “Making daddy change the stinky ones?  Good baby.”

***

Margot’s first game, after she got all of her appropriate vaccinations, was against the Toronto Maple Leafs.  Elias and Svea made sure to go to the arena early so that his teammates could see her before the game.  Even Elias’s friend William Nylander from the Leafs was able to pop over and congratulate the couple.  Svea appreciated the gesture, since she knew how busy he was.  

“Oh my Gooooooddddd,” Holly cooed as she saw Margot dressed up in a little Vancouver Canucks jersey.  “The baby jersey!  The baby jersey!  Can Gunnar be this small again?!”

Svea laughed as Holly clutched at her heart.  Bo smiled from ear to ear when he noticed, too.  “She’s adorable, Svea.”

“Thanks, Bo.”

“Bo, remember when Gunnar was that small?” Holly asked her husband.  She then wrapped her arms around his one arm, looking up at him sweetly.  “Can we have another one, Bo?  Please?”

“Holly.”

***

Svea hauled some of the grocery bags – the lighter ones, at least – inside the house.  She would leave the other ones for Elias.  He’d probably get angry that she brought in the light groceries, anyway.  He always brought things in – ever since her surgery, at least.  But she was feeling almost back to normal now, and she wanted to start contributing more again.

“Elias?” she called out.  No answer.  She set the grocery bags down in the laundry room and made her way into their house.  “Elias?” she called out again. 

It was only then when he heard loud, screaming giggles coming from the family room.  Following the giggles, Svea heard the sound of raspberries being blown against skin, and an orchestra of loud, happy giggles again, this time from both Margot and Elias.

She smiled to herself.  As she walked further into the house, turning a corner, she looked into the family room to find Elias on his knees in front of the couch, Margot on the cushion in between his arms in just a diaper, and him blowing raspberries on her tummy.  Margot was laughing and wiggling in pure happiness.  And when Svea’s presence caught Elias’s eye, he looked up.  “Hey baby,” he smiled, before diving in one more time to blow raspberries.

Svea’s heart swelled.

***

“You and Elias deserve a nice Valentine’s Day date,” Grace said before taking a sip of her water.  “How about Brock and I watch Margot for the night and you two go out for a nice dinner?”

Svea loved the idea, but she was still a bit apprehensive.  It would be the first night away from Margot.  And though she trusted Brock and Grace more than anyone else in Vancouver with Margot, it would still be a lot for her, at least mentally.  She assumed it would be the same for Elias.  “I’ll mention it to Elias, and we’ll think about it,” she said.

Grace eyed her.  “Don’t think about it, just do it.  I know it’s hard to think about, but time away from the baby will do you both some good.  It’s necessary.  It’s healthy.  It’s hard but it’s healthy.”

***

“This steak is delectable,” Svea commented as she forked another slice of her filet into her mouth.  

Elias nodded from across the table.  “The wine, too.  It was a good choice,” he said before he took a sip.  He looked lovingly at his wife and smiled before he set his wine glass down.  “D’you miss Margot like I do?”

Svea giggled and nodded her head.  “I do.  But I’m enjoying our Valentine’s Day date,” she said.  “I wouldn’t be anywhere else in the world.”

“Me neither,” he reached across the table to grab her hand.

***

Elias and Stella walked into the bedroom quietly, Elias holding mugs of tea in both hands.  He saw Svea sitting up, looking down peacefully at Margot whom she was breastfeeding.  Svea grabbed the mug from Elias and took a quick sip before setting it down on the nightstand.  Elias climbed into the bed, Stella following, and nestled in close with his two girls, gently stroking Margot’s blonde hair.  

“Thank you for the tea,” Svea said softly, looking at him before pursing her lips slightly, signaling she wanted a kiss.  

Elias gave her one easily.  His lips lingered on hers, giving her small, quick kisses.  “You’ve given me everything I’ve ever wanted,” he whispered huskily.  “The least I could do is bring you tea.”

“Hmmm,” Svea hummed happily.  “Can I suggest some other things you can do tonight?”

Elias smirked.

***

“Look here little Margot!  Look here!” the photographer cooed as her assistant jingled some bells to get the attention of the baby, dressed up in the cutest little dress and tights.  Margot babbled slightly and smiled at the noise.  Elias could hear the shutter of the camera go off like crazy.

“Her eyes are showing up spectacularly on camera,” the photographer commented.  “What a beautiful colour they are.”

Elias and Svea continued to smile throughout the photoshoot.  Then, when they had to take a break, they changed Margot into a different outfit and went outside to take some more pictures.  After a second break, they changed Margot into her last outfit before going to their bedroom and finishing the photoshoot.  

“The photos should be ready for you in a few weeks, after editing,” the photographer said as she packed away her equipment.  By this point, Margot was fast asleep on Elias’s shoulder, her chubby cheeks amplified.  “She’s a cutie, you guys.  I mean, just adorable.”

Elias smiled, placing a soft kiss atop Margot’s head.  “She’s my little princess.”

***

At a cute little café in Yaletown, Svea pushed her stroller back and forth to rock Margot to sleep.  Svea hadn’t gotten any sleep last night thanks to her daughter, and Elias being away on a road trip didn’t help matters.  Svea knew babies went through sleep regression – Margot had been a fantastic sleeper, save for the last two weeks – but she wondered how long this would last.  She was trying everything she could, but Margot wasn’t sleeping.

When Grace arrived without any of her kids in tow, looking especially stylish with a cute hat and thigh-high boots, Svea waved her down.  Grace waved back and waited in line to order her coffee.  

“You look like you haven’t slept,” Grace commented as she set her coffee down on the table and sat in the seat opposite Svea.

“That’s because I haven’t,” Svea admitted.  She hadn’t even bothered to put on makeup this morning.  “Margot kept me up all night.  She was so fussy, Grace.”

Grace furrowed her brows.  “Do you have milk with you?” she asked.

Svea nodded.  “Of course I do.  In the bag.”

Grace nodded, getting up from her seat.  “Come on.  We’re going home.”

“Wait—what—”

“We’re going back to my house, and you’re sleeping, and I’ll watch and feed Margot.”

Svea could cry.

***

“Look.  At.  The.  CHUNK!!!!!” Brock practically screamed as he looked over Elias’s shoulder as Elias finished putting a new diaper on Margot, who was wiggling happily and cooing at seeing Brock’s face over her dad’s shoulder.  “Look at you!  Look at your chunk!  Look at it!” Brock kept repeating.

“Brock—”

“What’re you gonna do with all these rolls?  What’re you gonna do with all these rolls?!”

“Brock—”

“You gonna open a bakery?  You gonna open up a bakery with all these rolls?”

“BROCK!”

“WHAT?!”

“Get me her blanket!”

Brock moved to the side and reached over to get the soft blanket he knew Elias wanted.  “You don’t have to be so mean,” he grumbled at his best friend.

***

“Look, Svea!  Look!  Look!” Elias’s voice was frantic as he called Svea over from the kitchen.  He could hear her footsteps as she rushed over to the family room.  “Look!”

Svea looked at Elias on his stomach on the floor, a few feet away from Margot who was also on her tummy.  She’d hit the traditional milestone of rolling over a bit early – four months in, instead of five – and now, at just over six months old, Svea watched as Margot started creeping along the floor, moving closer and closer to her dad as he kept wiggling further and further away.  

“Eeeeeeh!” she would cry out in complaint of her seemingly not getting closer to her dad.  “Eeeeeh!”

“Come on Margot!  Just a little bit more!” Elias smiled wide.

She creeped some more, and when she was finally close enough, Elias began peppering her face with kisses.  She giggled at the feeling and screeched with happiness when he picked her up and held her in his arms.  “Baby’s on the move,” he smiled at Svea.

She nodded her head.  “We’re not gonna be able to sit down anymore.”

***

“Where do you think you’re going, missy?” Svea asked playfully as she watched Margot crawl along the hardwood floor of the kitchen.  Her chunky rolls filled out her avocado-printed onesie she was wearing as she made a beeline for the sunlight coming through the sliding door.  

“Aaaaaeeeeeeee!” Margot squeaked at the sound of her mother’s voice, looking back.

“Where are you going?” Svea asked.  

“Eeeeeeeaaaaaaaaa!”

“Eeeeeeeaaaaaaaaa!” Svea mimicked, knowing she should be mimicking the sounds for Margot’s development.  She grabbed her phone off the counter and walked around her, crouching down on the floor and opening her camera for a video.  “Come on Margot!  Let’s show daddy how you can crawl!”

“Aaaaaaaadadada!!” she said, continuing her babbling and crawling as she made her way against the hardwood floor and towards the camera.  

Later, when Svea held Margot on hip as she fixed a quick bowl of raspberries as a snack, she sent the video to Elias.  His response was almost immediate.

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

***

“She’s cruising now,” Svea explained on the phone to Grace.  “Like, she can stand, but the second she takes a step she’s too wobbly and falls down.  But if she’s got the couch or the coffee table, she’s okay.”

“She’s going to be walking soon,” Grace said confidently.  “You guys think you weren’t able to sit down once she started crawling?  Well, good luck now,” she giggled.  

“I don’t know how you did this three times in a row while pregnant with the next,” Svea admitted.  “Crouching down, picking her up, over and over and over again…all that with a bump?  You’re superwoman, Grace.”

“I’m not superwoman, I’m just a mom,” Grace said.  “For going what you went through to deliver her, you’re superwoman too, you know.”

***

“Come to daddy, Margot.  Come to daddy,” Elias beckoned as he sat with his arms and legs outstretched about six feet away from Svea, who was holding Margot up by just her hands.  All of the videos Svea had sent him over the last road trip of Margot trying to walk and then falling made him want to practice once he got home.  He refused to see his daughter’s first steps over an iPhone video, and Svea understood that completely.

“Go to daddy,” Svea whispered in her daughter’s ear as she let go of her hands.

Margot wobbled a bit, took a cautionary first step, then a second, and at her parent’s excited voices, she smiled and continued with her steps, reaching Elias who was so elated with joy that he scooped her up in his arms and peppered her chubby face with kisses.  Svea could see tears escaping his eyes as he repositioned his daughter, holding her up again by her hands, and encouraging her to walk to Svea.  Some more wobbly steps and a mid-distance squat later, Margot was back in Svea’s arms, getting more kisses.

They had a walker.

***

“Your costumes are sooooo awesome, girls!” Svea cooed as she looked at Violet, Lily, Rose, and Poppy dressed up in their witch costumes as she entered the Boeser house.  “Are you girls ready to go trick-or-treating?”

The four girls nodded their heads excitedly.  “What’s Margot dressed up as?!” Violet asked.

“You’ll see when Elias brings her in,” Svea smiled, watching as Dukey, dressed up as Buzz Lightyear came running towards the door.  “Hi Dukey!”

“I Buzz Lightyear!” he screamed excitedly.  “Look!” he turned around to show off the wings of the costume.  He raised his hand in the air.  “Iffity and blonde!”

“To infinity and beyond!” Svea copied him.

Before they could go any further, Elias walked through the door with Margot in his arms and her diaper bag over his shoulder.  “Hello girls,” Elias greeted them.  “Nice costumes!  Look at Svea’s!”

The four girls cooed at her, admiring her in her cute little costume.  “Mooooooom!  Svea’s a strawberry!”

From inside the house, Elias and Svea could hear Grace scream in delight.

***

“Haaaaaappy Birthdaaayyyyy to you!  Haaaaaappy Birthdaaayyyyy to you!  Haaaaaappy Birthdaaayyyyy dear Maaaaarrrgggooooottt!  Haaaaaappy Birthdaaayyyyy to you!”

Margot was smiling from ear to ear as she giggled and clapped excitedly as everyone sang to her.  Her first birthday party was a hit – Irene and Torbjorn were able to come in from Sweden, Emil and Fanny were Zooming in with their kids, and practically the entire team and their kids were over the Pettersson house celebrating the big day.  

“Blow, Margot!  Blow!” Elias bent down so he was at the same eye-level as his daughter in her high chair.  He showed her how to do it before watching as she tried to mimic him.  “Blow!”

Instead, Margot made a loud fart noise with her mouth.

Everyone laughed hysterically.  Elias could hear Brock scream “I hope someone got that on video!”  Elias watched as Svea bent down to be at eye-level with Margot too.  “On three!  One, two three!  Blow!”

***

“Say mama.  Mama,” Elias said as he lay on his back on the couch and hat Margot sitting on his chest.  “Mama.  Mommy.”

“Dada.”

“No, no dada.  Mmmmmmmaaaammmmmmaaaaa,” he emphasized.  “Mama!”

“Dada!”

“MAMA!”

“DADA!”

“Elias!” Svea yelled from the kitchen.  “You can’t force her words.”

Elias grumbled.  “Mama,” he said, much quieter so Svea wouldn’t hear.  “Mama.”

“DADA!”

***

“Gröt,” Svea cooed as she spooned some more oatmeal into a spoon.  It was already all over Margot’s face and hands, Margot loving every spoonful.  Her big blue eyes looked at the spoon excitedly.  “This is gröt, Margot.  Gröt.”

“Do we really want Margot’s first Swedish word to be oatmeal?” Elias laughed as he joined his girls at the table, setting his mug of coffee down and placing Svea’s tea beside her on the table.  

“It’s at least a single syllable,” Svea mused.  She looked back at Margot, who had just swallowed the spoonful of oatmeal and was pointing at Elias taking a sip of his coffee.  “Gröt.  Gröt!” Svea repeated.  “Gröt!”

Margot pointed emphatically.  “Fika!” she said suddenly.  Svea’s and Elias’s jaws dropped.  “Fika!”

Elias snorted from behind Svea.  “Fika.  Of course her first Swedish world would be fika.”

***

“If I’m going to go back to work – I mean, I am, it’s not a question – we need to find a good daycare,” Svea said, eyes focused on her laptop screen as Margot was napping.  

“More important than the daycare, Svea, is if you’re ready,” Elias cautioned.  “Are you ready to go back to work?”

Svea had thought about it a lot – she really did.  Being at home with Margot was amazing, of course – it was the best thing ever, and she valued every millisecond – but she was ready to return to her career.  It wasn’t that she had a duty or an obligation to, or that she was feeling forced or pressured or put it on herself to be a do-it-all working mother.  She just…genuinely felt like it was the right thing to do for her.  Svea never saw herself as a stay-at-home-mother, even though she and Elias had boatloads full of money and she was told by co-workers, well-meaning-but-ultimately-offensive-friends, and random people that she didn’t need to work.  “I’m ready,” she nodded her head.  “I know it’s not going to be the same as it was before, that I won’t be working as hard, but that doesn’t matter to me.  I’ve already perfected my role.  I’ve already won an election for my party.  But I still…I still want to work.”

Elias nodded his head.  He knew Svea meant every word.  And who was he to say no?  There was no way.  He never held Svea back before, and he wasn’t going to start now.  “Then let’s look at daycares.”

***

“Every daycare we’ve been to, I haven’t gotten the best feeling,” Svea admitted to Grace as she was over her house for coffee.  Dukey and Margot were playing in their playpen in eyeshot as the women spoke about their lives.  “And it’s not me being…me.  I can’t picture Margot there.  I just can’t.  And it’s not me being picky either.  We even brought her to our favourite place to see if she’d like it and she was wailing the entire time.”

Grace was nodding in understanding, but the second Svea mentioned picturing Margot in a daycare, the lightbulb went off in her brain.  “Svea, why don’t I watch her every day?”

Svea was taken aback.  “W—What?”

“What if I watched her?  I’m already home with Dukey anyway.  And you know Margot is comfortable here at the house, and she knows me.  What if I watched her?”

Svea shook her head.  “Grace, no.  No.  I couldn’t do that to you—”

“You’re not doing it to me if I’m offering,” Grace said.  “You know how much I love kids.  It would be so fun for me!  And for Dukey!  And you know how much the girls adore her so when they get home from school you know they’ll be all about it too.  Will you promise me you’ll at least think about it?”

***

--- OFFICE OF THE PREMIER OFFICIAL PRESS RELEASE ---

The Office of the Premier would like to formally thank Mitchell Maloney for fulfilling his duties as the acting chief of staff for the past eighteen months.  The office would like to formally announce that Maloney will be assigned the role of Deputy Communications Director, effective two weeks from today, as he transfers out of his position.

The Office of the Premier would like to formally welcome back Svea Pettersson from her maternity leave.  Pettersson will continue to fulfill her duties as the Premier’s Chief of Staff moving forward.  

***

“Oooooooooohhhhh fuuuuuuck, Elias,” Svea moaned, looking over her shoulder at Elias who had just slipped into her from behind.  “Feels so good baby.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Svea nodded.  “I love it when you fuck me from behind.”

She could hear Elias let out a low chuckle.  He began moving in and out of her slowly, almost too slowly, because Svea groaned, and Elias watched as she grabbed at their bedsheets, making her knuckles white.  “Fuck me, Elias.”

“What’s that, pretty girl?” he asked mischievously.

“Fuck me, Elias.  Fuck me harder,” Svea begged.

Elias bent over, placing kisses along her shoulders before nestling his head in the crook of her neck so he could whisper in her ear.  “I fucking love it when you beg.”

***

“Can you say bye-bye to Mama?  Bye bye!” Grace cooed as she bent down to be at level with both Margot and Svea who was already bending down, having kissed her daughter for a solid two minutes, unable to leave just yet.  “Say bye-bye!”

“Bye bye Margot!  You be good for mommy!” Svea cooed, her voice cracking as she began waving her hand so Margot could mimic her.  “Bye bye!”

“Bah-bah!” Margot clasped her hand open and closed.  “Bah-bah!”

“Bye-bye!” Svea wiped a tear that had fallen from her eye.  She stood up, and Grace followed, picking up Margot and balancing her on her hip.  “Please call me if—”

“I will, I will,” Grace interrupted.  “Please don’t worry.  I’ve got it.  Enjoy your first day at work knowing your daughter is safe and having fun.”

“I’m definitely gonna try…can’t guarantee it’ll happen,” Svea tried to joke.

***

“Go like this Margot!  Like this!” Elias said as he was on his knees, clutching a mini-stick, trying to show Margot how to hit the ball into the little hockey net they purchased months ago, which inevitably became the one thing that helped Margot learn how to walk the most.

Margot watched intently as her dad gripped the mini stick and hit the ball into the net, fetching to get it before placing it in front of her.  “Shoot!  Shoot!” he encouraged, making a swooping motion with the stick.

Margot looked down at the ball, and in one swift movement, she brought her mini-stick down and hit it straight into the net.  Elias went wild.  He began screaming and clapping and raising his hands in the air, causing Margot to start screaming and clapping and raising her hands up in the air too.  He swooped her up in his arms and gave her raspberry-style kisses, causing her to shriek and giggle loudly and controllably.  “Margot wins the game!  Margot wins the game!” he screamed in between kisses.

Svea could hear them from upstairs as she read over some work documents for tomorrow.  She felt her heart swell with love.  

***

“Who knew when we were twenty and lame that we’d be surrounded by this many girls,” Brock mused, cracking open a can of beer for Elias.  Both men looked out onto Elias’s backyard to see Violet, Rose, Lily, Poppy, and Margot all playing together, blowing bubbles and trying to catch them without popping them.  Margot was always unsuccessful, but she was having the time of her life.

Elias nodded his head.  “We’re a pair of pretty lucky guys though,” he commented.

Brock nodded his head, looking at his four daughters.  “The luckiest guys in the world.”

Later in the afternoon, when Margot had to go down for her nap, Elias was rocking her back and forth as she fell asleep on his shoulder.  Rose was quiet as she stood with him in the room, keeping a watchful eye and making sure Svea was falling asleep.  When Elias laid Margot down on the bed, Rose finally spoke.  “Uncle Petey?”

“Yes Rosey?”

“Can Margot be my sister?”

Elias smiled.  “I think she already is.”

***

“I’m actually gonna sob.  She looks so cute,” Svea commented as Elias finished putting on Margot’s toddler skates.  Margot was bundled up in a blue jacket with green tights, the colour of the Canucks, and her helmet was already placed securely on her head.  “You excited, Margot?”

“Yaaa!” she squeaked out, smiling at her mom.  “Skate!”

“Yes!  We’re going skating!” Elias cooed, picking her up and placing her on his hip as he and Svea began their walk towards the ice.  

Svea made sure to get her phone ready on video mode, knowing she’d been taking tons and tons of videos.  Most of the Canucks and their families were already on the ice, but Margot had had a mini meltdown when the helmet was put on, which delayed them.  Elias stepped onto the ice, keeping Margot on his hip as he skated around quickly, making her laugh hysterically.  Eventually, he carefully set her down on the ice, crouching down slightly behind her.  She began moving her feet as if she was walking, with Elias holding her hands above her head.

“Look at mommy Margot!  Say hi to mommy!” Elias said as Svea followed them, skating backwards slowly, filming a video on her phone.

“Hiiiiiii!” Margot said, smiling through the wire.  “Hiiiiii!”

“Hi baby!  Look at you skating!” Svea cooed as she continued the video.  “Look at you go!”

Margot squealed excitedly, looking back up at her dad who was smiling down at her as well.  “Skate!  Skate!”

***

“Let’s hope she knows how to blow this time and doesn’t fart again,” Brock commented as he helped Elias light the candles on Margot’s 2nd birthday cake.

“We’ll see,” Elias giggled.  “We haven’t practiced.”

Brock carried the cake so Elias could be beside Margot and Svea.  Everybody began singing happy birthday, and when he placed the cake in front of Margot, she clapped and wiggled excitedly.  Once everyone finished singing, it was time to see.  “Blow, Margot!  Blow!” Grace called out.

She took a deep breath in.  She looked like she was going to do it on her own.  And then…

Fart noise.

Everybody burst out into hysterical laughter.  “Two-for-two!” Brock screamed.

***

“Margot…Margot, look here,” Svea said as she balanced her on her knee, reading her a book since she’d requested it.  “Look here,” she pointed at the words at the bottom of the page.

Margot reached her hands out and pulled the book closer to her eyes.  Svea noticed her squinting until she brought the book really close to her face.  She put her finger above her mom’s and pointed to the animal on the page.  “Monkey!” she said.

Svea felt worry pool in the pit of her stomach.  She pushed the book back to its original distance away from Margot and turned the page.  “What’s this, Margot?” she asked again.

Margot reached out again to bring the book close to her eyes.  “Monkey in tree!”

“Good job, baby,” Svea cooed, closely watching her daughter.  Maybe she was overreacting.  Maybe Margot was just tired.  But Svea knew she was going to mention it to Elias when he got home.  “You’re so smart, baby.”

***

They were pink, naturally, because Margot got to choose and she was all about anything pink.  Elias was worried they would bother her, or she wouldn’t like them, or put up a giant fit once they were finally on and she realized she had to wear them all the time.  He’d shed a tear or two about it, worried like any father would be.  But Margot was taking to them surprisingly well.

“Look, Margot!” Margot’s optometrist smiled as she held up a mirror for Margot to see herself.  “These are your new glasses!  They’re for you!”

“PINK!” Margot exclaimed, swinging her feet excitedly as she saw herself in the mirror.  

“Yes, they’re pink!”

Margot looked up at her dad; she was sitting on his lap, after all.  Her giant smile with her little teeth caused him to smile too.  “Pink, daddy!”

“What’s this, Margot?” the optometrist had already opened a book and held it open a way’s away from Margot.  “What’s this right here?” she pointed to Big Bird on the page.

“Big Bird!”

***

Elias groaned as he finally slipped his hard cock into Svea.  They had been spooning in bed for what felt like hours that morning, waking up well before Margot usually did.  Elias could hear Svea groan at his length filling her up from behind, and she savoured the feeling of him peppering kisses on the backs of her shoulder blades.  “Good morning, pretty girl,” Elias mumbled coarsely in her ear as he thrust in and out of her slowly.

“G’morning, baby,” Svea smiled.  She felt Elias’s hand snake up from her hip to her breast, cupping it in his hand.  “I could get used to waking up with your hard cock inside of me.”

“Mmm, be careful what you wish for, pretty girl.”

“I know exactly what I’m wishing for.”

Elias began moving his hips more, making sure he was getting exactly the right angle even though their movement were still slow and purposeful; when Svea began moaning, closing her eyes when they rolled to the back of her head, he knew what he was doing was exactly what she wanted and needed.  “I love you so fucking much,” she mumbled out, putting her hand over his that was still cupping her breast.

“I love you too,” he placed a tender kiss on her neck.  “Thank you for giving me everything I’ve ever needed.”

Svea smiled at that, biting down on her bottom lip.  “The pleasure’s been all mine.”

***

On a beautiful, hot, and sunny afternoon in Ånge, Elias couldn’t help but smile as he watched his dad hold Margot as they swam in the pool together at his parents’ house.  Margot was having the time of her life in the water – after the baby swimming classes Svea had signed her up for, Elias figured she’d be happy and in her element.  His dad couldn’t get enough of being a grandpa to a little girl, and neither could his mom.  They spoiled all of their grandchildren.  Törbjörn had even bought Margot a little bucket hat with the Swedish flag on it to wear while they were in the pool.  

“Gillar du att stänka vattnet?” his dad cooed as Margot splashed the water with her hands.  “Tänk om jag gjorde det här?” he asked again, throwing her up in the air and catching her low enough so she could splash in the water.  Margot shrieked in delight, and that was enough reason for Törbjörn to continue.  

Elias laughed along with his daughter.  She had the best grandpa.  

***

“Look at all the pretty flowers Margot,” Svea said as she held Margot against her hip, watching Elias as he crowned her with a beautiful flower crown that Fanny helped him make.  

“Woooowww,” Margot said, grabbing at it because she was so excited.  

“Gentle!” Elias warned softly.  He didn’t want it to break after Fanny worked so hard on it.  “Be gentle, Margot,” he repeated as he made sure it was on snugly and properly before pulling his hands away.

“My flower!  My crown!” she smiled.  “Daddy, you have flowers too?”

Elias eyed Svea with a smirk on his face.  Svea knew he’d already crumbled.  All it took was that question from Margot.  He hadn’t exactly planned on wearing a flower crown, but he knew exactly where this was headed now.  “You want daddy to wear flowers too?”

Margot nodded her head enthusiastically.  “Mommy, daddy, me match!”

What Margot wanted; Margot got.  

***

“It would be the first picture we’ve posted of her since the Christmas card photos leaked,” Elias mused as he looked at the picture on his Instagram, almost, almost ready to hit the elusive ‘post’ button.  

“We didn’t release those – they were posted without our consent,” Svea clarified.  She was right.  They had no control over that and were actually really upset about it.  To this day, they still don’t know who did it.  “This would be the first photo you post of her willingly.”

Elias looked over at his wife.  “Do you think I should do it?  It’s so fucking cute,” he looked back at his phone, admiring the picture one more time.  

In it, Margot was in her pink fluffy bathrobe, her wet hair combed back, and she was sitting on Elias’s chest as they were in bed together.  Elias was holding her, pursing his lips, and Margot was putting lip balm on his lips.  A classic “girl dad” photo, he thought.  And if he was going to send any message out into the world about his child and the relationship he had with her, it was going to be what was encapsulated in this picture.

Svea snuggled herself into Elias’s side, bringing her hand up and pressing ‘post’ for him.  “There,” she said, smiling.  “All done.”

***

“When she blows out the candles, she better fart again.”

“You’re gross.”

“She’s gotta go three-for-three, Petey, or else this party is a bust.”

“You have a boy – can’t you go make fart jokes with him?”

“I have a boy who has grown up with four older sisters.  He isn’t exactly one for fart jokes.”

Elias shook his head at Brock, but he couldn’t help the smirk that grew on his face.  “You finally get a boy after four girls and you can’t even make a fart joke with him,” he shook his head playfully.  “Just your luck, eh?”

Brock shook his head.  “I have five healthy, beautiful kids.  I’ll take whatever I get.”

When Elias carried the cake in and Brock began recording on his phone, everybody began singing happy birthday to Margot – a happy, energetic but cautious, giggly but quiet, exactly-like-both-her-parents’-temperaments-it-was-kind-of-scary-three year old, who every day was looking more and more like Elias’s double.  She adjusted her glasses as everyone sang to her, and clapped along too.  When it was time to blow, she did.

No fart noises.

“Noooooooo!” Brock groaned loudly.  Elias pretended like he was going to backslap him over the head.  “No fart noise!”

“It was fun while it lasted,” Svea winked at him.

***

“Will they be in my class, mommy?” Margot asked as she looked into the classroom sheepishly, a little shy now that she was in a new environment.  Elias and Svea had started to talk to her about school, and how – now that she was a big girl – she needed to start going to school to learn, just like how Violet, Rose, Lily, and Poppy went to school.  

“Can I go to Poppy’s school?” she asked nervously one day.

Elias and Svea decided to take her there, knowing that it would make her feel more comfortable.  Knowing that Violet, Rose, Lily, and Poppy went there too put her at ease.  When they saw all the girls in the junior kindergarten class in their green plaid dresses, they could tell Margot recognized them from seeing them on the Boeser girls.  

“These girls won’t be in your class, but new girls who are the same age as you will be,” Svea said.  “Do you like that?”

Margot hesitated slightly before nodding her head.  “I like new friends.”

***

“She is out cold,” Svea smiled as she lowered herself slowly and gently onto the couch, making sure not to disturb the peaceful image before her: Margot, after an exciting and fun day of shopping for her new school uniform, completely knocked out in Elias’s arms, sleeping soundly on his chest as he rubbed her back.

Svea cradled her body into Elias, too, snuggling up against him and admiring her daughter.  From the blonde hair on her head, to her pink glasses on her face, to her cute little toes Elias still loved to pretend to eat, she was perfect.  As Svea thought this, she felt Elias grab her hand between them and bring it up to his lips for a kiss, holding on to it as his thumb grazed over her skin.  “We did alright in the end, didn’t we?”

Svea smiled and nodded her head.  “We did.”

“She’s perfect.  She’s just perfect,” he said, placing the lightest of kisses atop Margot’s head.

“I was just thinking the same thing,” Svea admitted.

Elias looked over at her, craning his head down to give his wife a kiss.  “I love you more than I know how to explain.  Thank you for giving me the light in my life.”

***

“Then all around from far away across the world, he smelled good things to eat, so he gave up being king of where the wild things are,” Elias read to Margot as they cuddled together in the rocking chair in her room.  In her comfortable jammies and with her head on his chest, she was mouthing along to all the words of the book.  Elias could see her get progressively more tired as he flipped through the pages, though she kept trying to mouth along and kept trying to keep her eyes open.  

When they finished, Elias put the book on her bedside table as he cradled Margot in his arms and lay her down in bed, making sure to put the covers over her just how she liked.  Still struggling to keep her eyes open, he brushed some hair out of her face.  “Daddy?” she asked in her sweet voice.

“Yes baby?”

“I love you daddy.”

Elias smiled.  “I love you too, Margot.”

“Will you read to me always?” she asked.

Elias nodded his head automatically.  “Always.”

***

“Look at her go!” Grace exclaimed as she watched Margot zoom around the ice, chasing Poppy and Dukey around as they all giggled like maniacs.  “I mean, who am I kidding?  The daughter of Elias Pettersson?  Of course she’s gonna skate like that!”

“She’s definitely a natural,” Svea smiled as her eyes followed her daughter around the ice.  Brock and Elias both skated up behind their kids and scooped them up in their arms, giving them kisses before setting them back down on the ice together.  “Do you ever think about how far we’ve all come…based on where we started when we met each other in our early twenties?”

“All the time,” Grace nodded.  “We were so young!  We were kids!  Now there’s six kids between us!”

“A little skewed on your side, though,” Svea winked.

Grace elbowed her playfully.  “We did good.”

***

“Margot!  Margot!” Elias called out to his daughter who was already having fun with a new friend in her classroom as they played with a xylophone together.  Other parents were in the room doing the exact same thing as he and Svea: making sure everything was okay on the first day of school.  But the longer he and Svea stood there watching her, the more they realized she didn’t need them there; that she would thrive in the classroom and not have a meltdown about being in a new place.  

To her credit, Margot listened when she heard her dad call her name and got up from her seat to hop over to her parents.  “Mommy and daddy have to go now,” Elias said as he and Svea crouched down so they could by at eye-level with her.  She nodded her head in understanding.  “You listen to Mrs. Becker, okay?”

“I will.”

“Aunt Grace is going to come pick you up with Violet, Rose, Lily, and Poppy.  Remember?” Svea asked.

“Yes mommy.”

“And remember—” Svea choked up slightly, Elias putting her hand over hers.  “Mommy and daddy love you very much.”

“I love you too!” Margot said as she hugged her parents goodbye before skipping back to her friend and playing with the xylophone again.  

Elias and Svea said goodbye to Mrs. Becker and held hands as they left the school building and walked back together to their car in the parking lot, silent the entire time.  When Svea looked over at Elias once they were back in the privacy of their car, she could see tears streaming down his face.  “Now you’re going to make me cry,” she said, wiping a few tears that had fallen.

“She’s so good.  I’m so proud of her,” he said, wiping his own tears with the backs of his hands.  “No meltdowns!  Just walked right in there and started making friends.  She’s so good.”

“Don’t jinx it – she might have a meltdown tomorrow,” Svea joked, trying to lighten the mood.

It garnered a smile out of Elias.  He looked at his wife and placed his hand over hers tenderly.  “I love you so much,” he mumbled, bringing her hand up to kiss it before cradling it against his chest, above his heart.  All these years later, I’ve just grown to love you more, if that’s even possible.”

“I think it is, because I grew to love you more too,” Svea said softly.  “My Elias.  Always my Elias.

He kissed her hand again.  “My moon, my stars, my Svea.”

[theglassespredicament]

The sirens are screaming, and the fires are howling

Way down in the valley tonight

There's a man in the shadows with a gun in his eye

And a blade shining oh so bright

There's evil in the air and there's thunder in the sky

And a killer's on the bloodshot streets

And down in the tunnels where the deadly are rising

Oh, I swear I saw a young boy down in the gutter

He was starting to foam in the heat

Oh, baby you're the only thing in this whole world

That's pure and good and right

And wherever you are and wherever you go

There's always gonna be some light

But I gotta get out, I gotta break it out now

Before the final crack of dawn

So we gotta make the most of our one night together

When it's over, you know

We'll both be so alone

Like a bat out of hell, I'll be gone when the morning comes

When the night is over, like a bat out of hell

I'll be gone, gone, gone

Like a bat out of hell

I'll be gone when the morning comes

But when the day is done

And the sun goes down

And the moonlight's shining through

Then like a sinner before the gates of Heaven

I'll come crawling on back to you

I'm gonna hit the highway like a battering ram

On a silver-black phantom bike

When the metal is hot, and the engine is hungry

And we're all about to see the light

Nothing ever grows in this rotting old hole

And everything is stunted and lost

And nothing really rocks, and nothing really rolls

And nothing's ever worth the cost

Well I know that I'm damned if I never get out

And maybe I'm damned if I do

But with every other beat I've got left in my heart

You know I'd rather be damned with you

Well, if I gotta be damned, you know I want to be damned

Dancing through the night with you

Well, if I gotta be damned, you know I want to be damned

Gotta be damned, you know I want to be damned

Gotta be damned, you know I want to be damned

Dancing through the night

Dancing through the night

Dancing through the night with you

Oh, baby you're the only thing in this whole world

That's pure and good and right

And wherever you are and wherever you go

There's always gonna be some light

But I gotta get out, I gotta break it out now

Before the final crack of dawn

So we gotta make the most of our one night together

When it's over, you know

We'll both be so alone

Like a bat out of hell, I'll be gone when the morning comes

When the night is over, like a bat out of hell

I'll be gone, gone, gone

Like a bat out of hell, I'll be gone when the morning comes

But when the day is done

And the sun goes down

And the moonlight's shining through

Then like a sinner before the gates of Heaven

I'll come crawling on back to you

Then like a sinner before the gates of Heaven

I'll come crawling on back to you

Well, I can see myself tearing up the road, faster

Than any other boy has ever gone

And my skin is raw, but my soul is ripe

And no one's gonna stop me now, I'm gonna make my escape

But I can't stop thinking of you

And I never see the sudden curve 'til it's way too late

And I never see the sudden curve 'til it's way too late

Then I'm down at the bottom of a pit in the blazing sun

Torn and twisted at the foot of a burning bike

And I think somebody somewhere must be tolling a bell

And the last thing I see is my heart, still beating

Breaking out of my body and flying away

Like a bat out of hell

Then I'm down in the bottom of a pit in the blazing sun

Torn and twisted at the foot of a burning bike

And I think somebody somewhere must be tolling a bell

And the last thing I see is my heart

Still beating, still beating

Breaking out of my body and flying away

Like a bat out of hell

Oh, like a bat out of hell

Oh, like a bat out of hell

Oh, like a bat out of hell (I'll be gone when the morning comes)

Oh, like a bat out of hell (I'll be gone when the morning comes)

Oh, like a bat out of hell

<3 im bored <3

literally i hate u i hate u i hate u. you are the worst

[aelingalathyniusrailme]

If you find me on the edge, we’ll jump together.

Pirate au pt 4

azriel was so insanely close to sucker punching berdara. but unfortunately the bargain forbid him from hurting her until after they found the huge hall

he was heading towards his own ship when gwyneth stopped him. “pick your best men I can fit 5 maximum of you on my ship” 

“and why exactly are we taking your ship” 

“and why are you determined to be difficult” he nearly laughed at that, him difficult when she had spent the last 10 minutes toying with him at every chance. 

“I am determined to be fair, we’ll play for it” 

that peaked her interest as her eyes went wide “sword fighting, combat, cards, good old fashioned fists?!?” what was with this girl and fighting.

“uh no I was going to suggest rock paper scissors.” 

“who hurt you to make you so damn boring” 

“who made you a masochist” 

gwyneth didn’t falter for a second “wouldn’t you like to know” she said with a lazy grin

“so majesty are we going to play or not?” 

“best of three”

she put her fist up in answer. 

once again I’ll cut to the chase, after many rounds and accused cheatings azriel won 

“Oh fuck off” she grumbled while he smirked triumphantly 

“that’s not very nice gwyneth” obviously her response was to give him the finger

“bite me” 

“don’t give me any ideas” 

“do what you need to do we leave at dawn” 

“you’re going to be a delight on my ship aren’t you” 

“always am” with that they went back to their respective crews and ships to prepare. 

now that she had left to her own ship azriel thought over what had just happened. he wasn’t so much of a fool that he couldn’t admit she was  beautiful, with hair of flaming locks and a slightly insane look in her eye. there was something about her that despite being incredibly violent she radiated a certain amount of joy. every insult, every quip was said with a bright smile on her face. and she had pinned him with an alarming amount of ease but he wouldn’t let that happen a second time

and fucking hell he had made a bargain. well he knew for sure this journey was going to be something else alright 

on the shadowsinger azriel made an announcement to his crew “everyone sit your asses down and listen up. 5 ladies from the silver majesty are coming aboard our ship to assist us in our search for the huge hall. I am under bargain that no harm will come to any of them, so by affiliation every person aboard the shadowsinger is under the same bargain. you have any questions, take it up with rhys and cassian. I have shit to do in preparation for this voyage and to make sure our other ‘business partners’ stay up and running in our absence. do not bother me” 

about an hour later he was once again alone in his chambers with his first mate and quartermaster. 

“so you really believe they can lead us to it” cassian asked

“I believe that she made a bargain and knows the severity of a bargain.” 

“you bound yourself to the captain of our biggest rival, who you currently want to murder, captain I trust you with my life but I hope you know what you’ve gotten us into” rhys ever the strategist 

I hope so to he thought instead he said “I have thought over every possible outcome and we will come out of this with the huge hall and their heads strung up like trophies nailed to the wall.” 

————— gwyn’s pov at the same moment—————

alright crew fortunately the shadowsinger is on board, pun not intended, unfortunately I lost rock paper scissors and now I will be choosing 5 of us to join them in our hunt for the huge hall. so Em, archeron, VIv, and cressieda you guys are coming with me, bring only as many weapons as you can fit on your person. nuala cerridwen you guys are in charge. if everything is not in order by the time I get back I will start slitting throats. there are instructions in my chambers. so fuck, drink, steal, kill you guys know the drill.” 

gwyn sat with nesta and emerie strategizing 

“how do you see this playing out” nesta asked 

“oh we are going to walk away from this bleeding money with the shadowsinger kneeling at our feet” 

------------------------back to azriel’s pov------------------------

azriel watched as for the first time since he had become a pirate, there were women on his ship indefinitely. to gwyneth’s right stood a tall slender women, with her hair in a simple braid, she was assessing his ship with eyes that looked far too old for her age

to berdara’s left was a thin women with eyes that cut through him, they were sharp and very resentful. she was devastatingly beautiful with two katanas at her hips. behind them were two women with white hair but their differences lay in their skin tone. one had the fair skin of the winter court while the other had dark skin that contrasted her hair marking her as from the summer court. 

azriel looked over to his own crew. cassian was starring at the female with the swords practically drooling over himself while rhys looked indifferent. 

lucien was also starring at the women to gwyneth’s left but he looked at her like he recognized her rather then whatever the fuck cassian was doing 

the women noticed cassian and immediately threw a dagger at his head. it didn’t miss by much. 

“hey!” cassian shouted. “if you had chopped off my hair I swear to fucking god I will rip out your throat like its nothing” 

the girl looked him up and down and ignored him. “really you could have killed me”

so obviously she threw another one. it fell right between his arm and ribs

“berdara can I have a word please?”

“of course”

“rhys please make sure they don’t kill each other” 

“no promises” he replied not looking up

gwyn followed him into his room. 

“so shadowsinger, what do you want to talk about?” she gave him a light punch on the shoulder. he glared at her

“what do I want to talk about? hmm how about that girl just threw a dagger at my quartermaster. twice!”

“ok 1 that girls name is nesta and 2 if she wanted him dead he would be. so I consider that a great success” gwyn smiled earnestly. 

“are you forgetting the bargain we just made?”

“clearly threats were not taking off the table or have you forgotten ‘i will dump you in the river’ or ‘i’m going to shoot you in the head’ or ‘i will leave your guts across the 7 courts’ etc. hers was just a little more physical thats all.” 

“well can you try to control your crew” cheap shot but worth it, until gwyn broke out into a fit of laughter.

“me? control nesta? I thought you said you’ve heard the stories, you must have heard about the time she climbed 6 mountains in 5 different courts to find a man who ripped her off by 2 coppers. coppers! and I was all ‘that’s my girl’  because if there was one thing I’ve learned in this business it would be that men will take every single opportunity to tear you down but they can’t do that if they don’t have limbs.” 

“great so your entire crew is just as insane as you are”

“we maybe insane but at least we aren’t crying over every dagger that comes within an inch of our hearts.” 

“yes I’m sorry we would rather not fucking die”

“oh poor you, you must be a truly terrible pirate if death doesn’t stop at your door every once in a while.” 

“you know I am very much regretting working with you at this moment”

“wait you aren’t in love with me? shocker.” gwyn’s whole demeanor changed and she brightened as if some realization struck. “but that reminds me I was told I need your help to find the treasure and I certainly don’t need more man power so how will you be contributing?”

“I had thought about that and I was think about something you-”

“aww you think about me?” azriel rolled his eyes

“I was thinking about something you said and I would like you to elaborate on the blank map.”

“no please?”

“please” he forced out 

“well my informant who found me the map has never been wrong before and my witch says it reeks of magic.” 

“you think its spelled.” 

“I do”

“and you think I am going to help you uncover the magic?”

“indubitably” azriel was kind of impressed by her certainty

“aren’t you?”

“yes” he grumbled

“thought so, I’m smart like that.” 

“of course you are perfect in every way possible” 

“look any other day I would love for you to shower me in accurate compliments but we are kind of on a time crunch” 

“yes majesty”

“you know what its kind of growing on me, I too consider myself a queen” 

az ignored that and went to his closet. he opened the doors and unlocked the safe taking out the only thing in there. it was a small vile that contained a vibrant blue liquid. he gently carried it over to gwyn

“this is the last liquid fashioned by the last pheonix to ever exist”

“oh my fucking god you have pheonix piss” gwyn was practically jumping with glee. 

“I mean I wouldn’t exactly put it that way but yes, the liquid of the pheonix was said to act as a serum to reveal ones truth. it should be powerful enough to break through any ward or spell. and while mostly used on people it should work on objects too.”

“wait wait wait, that could get you millions and you’re going to use it on this??”

“who’s drooling now? yes it could but this hall could get me more and I’d prefer it not in the hands of certain people.”  

“alright I mean not really how I operate but it’s yours so you can do whatever you want with it.” “glad you approve, map?” gwyn cautiously pulled out the blank map and set it down on the table. 

he opened the vile and began to pour it over the map, praying that this would not be in vain. the vile had cost him greatly. he looked down and gwyn stole the words from his mouth “holy fucking shit.”

[callmearcturus]

I'm gonna hit the highway like a battering ram On a silver-black phantom bike When the metal is hot, and the engine is hungry And we're all about to see the light Nothing ever grows in this rotting old hole, And everything is stunted and lost And nothing really rocks, and nothing really rolls, And nothing's ever worth the cost Well I know that I'm damned if I never get out, And maybe I'm damned if I do, But with every other beat I've got left in my heart, You know I want to be damned with you

My mother's first album was Bat Out Of Hell. She imagines she's bought it about 7 times over her life, replacing it every time time she lost it. I grew up listening to Meat Loaf my entire childhood and adolescence.

Meat Loaf, 1947 - 2022