#➳❥ Rumour rants

[ruumirmir]

𝘐𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘔𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘘𝘶𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘗𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘣𝘰𝘺

ੈ♡˳ Author's note - I simply have too many unfiltered thoughts about them Sorry not Sorry. This is entirely self-indulgent and completely male-reader centered. Don't worry ladies,, If you're imaginative enough!! You too can self-insert into this yaoi!!! If any of these don't make sense to new readers Don'tttt worry about it :) Probably didn't make sense to ME either but the vibe matched. @eluxcastar my trusty co-pilot for this ship,, do you have any memes to add perchance 🎤🎤 I'd love to compile everything here.

If you think Pantalone isn't a possessive prick you're WRONG. Lucky for him some people are into that.

Being gorgeous and evil go hand-in-hand one cannot exist without the other

*Sighs dreamily* Dont we all

Synopsis of my first two Pantalone x Male reader requests everybody:

Im sorry but it would be fucking hilarious for the plot. Loverboy being soooooooo normal about the rumours going around that Dottolone are Such Close Business Partners,,

but actually dottolone fucking hate each other. Group projects tend to do that to people. Its the biomechanical malpractice doctor vs business unethics banker. And dottore getting a massive kick out of this one fatuu agent hating his guts . Idk Just a Thought :0

What being microwaved does to a man. Dont worry guys Pantalone can manipulate and gaslight me into a killing machine anyday bc he's hot <3

Hoyoverse canonizing Pantalone's anger-issues is the best thing that happened to me. you can never trust an anime snake with a (^‿^) face

One does not simply work in close proximity with a hot guy and Not think about getting boned atleast once.

Somebody save childe

Makes zero sense in hindsight but the lore is coming. trust 🙏 Something so delicious about finding your way back to the person that changed you forever.

Hes just a pathetic little guy your honor. Let us all enjoy his extreme sad boy demeanor and sopping wet meowmeowism before we put him through the HorrorsTM.

Synopsis of literally the most recent Loverboy one-shot by riri:

Something something blatant favoritism.

Reminder that Loverboy joins the Fatui as a part of mandated service right after graduating school at the fresh age of 18 and kills a guy roughly 3 years later :D

Peak dynamic btw. He can be your angle or yuor devil. As long as he's behind over your shoulder 👍

"I learned my passion in the Good Old Fashioned School of Loverboys"

Thankyou homoverse they made Pantalone a certified Yapper. Him and Loverboy are just the "Talks a lot" vs "Listens" ship

No caption. This was just funni

Hey guys can anyone tell that I love a good corruption arc.

Despite his increasingly worsening state of ethics, don't forget that deep down hes still going to be a sopping wet meowmeow💕

Idk blame @/eluxcastar riri they put the devil's temptation thoughts into my brain

[delicatereader]

I need you (stephen!hayden x reader)

• summary: Stephen is a little rusty in sex and needs some help

• warnings: well smut

• a/n: this is about hayden/stephen not the actual one. I didn't go deep with the smut bc I am just getting the hang of it so yea. enjoy! (btw I haven't proof read it so there are mistakes...

➽────────────────────────────❥

You've had an exhausting day at work, unfortunately you have to work overnight. All you want is a get away from this shit. There were only few others with you left. You peacefully working in your space, reading reports in your spinning chair when Stephen comes in.

He hastily grabs a chair and pulls it next to you to sit. You ignore him because you what was coming, he's gonna rant about how everyone thinks he's gay and no one likes him. You didn't think that way, you've had a cute crush on him for a while but didn't do anything because you worked with him and didn't have the time. You've always liked the way he talks and his glasses (you found them slutty and hot).

"What do you think of me?" he asks

"What do you mean?" you try to confirm, still reading the reports

"What do you think me?"

"You're kind, generous and hard-working!" you reply looking at him

"No like what do you think of me?" he repeats

You let out a harsh sigh annoyed.

"Like physically, do you find me attractive?" he blurts out

"What?" you respond in surprise

"Like am I attractive?" he asks again

"Yeah? why? did someone say anything to you?" you ask him concerned

"No..." he drags

"Spill" you demand

"Ok! It's been a while since you know..." he says

"What? I don't know"

"Since you know!" he looks at his pants and back up (twice)

"Sex?" you answer

"Shhhhh!" he silences you, making you giggle

"Someone will hear you! But yeah since I had sex" he continues

"So you want to start having sex again?" you ask

"Well yeah! It's been a long time" he admits

"How long?" you ask curiously

"Ummm...2 years?"

"What!? 2 years?! omg!" you yell whilst whispering

"I'm a bit rusty..." he says

You scoff as a response, "you will be"

"Oh shut up!" he responds

"Can't belive it! 2 years!" you laugh out loud

"Yep..." he says embarrassed, nodding his head

"Ok I won't laugh! I promise! you speak" you take a deep breath

"So everyone thinks I'm gay, I accidentally let people- no men stick their tongue down my throat and the girls I get run away when they hear the gay rumours" he explains his situation

"Well they just haven't seen your search history! trust me your straight!!" you confirm for him.

He leans back on the chair shocked

"How do you know my search history?"

"The other week you left early and forgot to log out. I did it for you" you smile at him proudly

"Anyways what am I supposed to do about this? I have some friends who might be interested..." you advise resting your head on you palms.

"No" he replies instantly

"Then?" you ask raising your eyebrows waiting for some details

"I need you" he mutters

"What?" you yell in shock

"You. I mean I don't know anyone else better. I'm close to you so it won't be that awkward!" he explains further

"What?! I can't!"

"Yes you can. Nat, Smith and Jade are leaving right now" he says placing a hand on your lap

"What?" as you respond you hear an elevator reach your floor seeing your colleagues leave

"It's just us! please!" he begs. You could see the desperation in his eyes.

"If I agree to this..." you drag

"I'll owe you a million" he offers

"Fine" you shrug even though you've wanted him for so long, you put on a act.

He instantly gets off the chair and kisses you

"Is that ok?" he asks

You nod in response

His kisses get more passionate and confident. His lips are awfully soft. His hands travel from your lap to your cheeks. He starts to kiss your neck, but whilst leaving a trail of kisses from behind your ear to you collarbone you get up and turn so he is in the chair. You're sat on his lap legs on both sides of him. He slips his around your waist and let's them travel your back and slip through your hair.

You pull his dark blonde curls, making him whimper. "You like that?"

The only response you got was a moan.

He starts to unbutton your shirt kissing your chest and around your bra. You follow his actions and pull his shirt off. He takes your bra off and kisses your breasts.

You slowly start to grind on him, making his head fall back in pleasure. "Fuck y/n!"

His breath starts to get heavier. He pulls his hand from your waist to tale off his glasses. Suddenly, you stop him.

"Whay are you doing?"

"Taking of my glasses?"

You lean against his mouth with a smirk

"The glasses stays on" you demand

"You have a thing for glasses?" He asks, locking his lips with a smile and carrying pire lust in his eyes.

"Shut up!" you say rolling your eyes at him whilst giggling

"We'll see who needs to shut up after this" he says with a mischievous smile leaning back in to kiss you

[ruumirmir]

─┉─¡! • !¡─┉─

Rumoured rants

𝘓𝘦𝘯𝘨𝘵𝘩𝘺 𝘙𝘢𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘮𝘺 𝘣𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴 :)

ੈ♡˳ Gojo Satoru delusional theorycrafting

ੈ♡˳ Zhongli x reader fic brainrot

ੈ♡˳ Genshin headcanon of fatui work environments Ft. Loverboy

ੈ♡˳ The Tsaritza's daughter

ੈ♡˳ Lore crafting for a Pantalone x m!reader

ੈ♡˳ Biblically accurate Genshin isekai

ੈ♡˳ Pantalone with a dragon!reader this time ੈ♡˳ Pantalone ft. sexy suits

ੈ♡˳ Loverboy’s hydro vision

ੈ♡˳ Regrator's personality crumbs

ੈ♡˳ Project Stuzha

ੈ♡˳ Boothill ft. Riri

ੈ♡˳ Flowers for the Harbingers

ੈ♡˳ Gossipposting behind the Harbinger's backs

ੈ♡˳ Big brother Scaramouche

ੈ♡˳ Penny for my thoughts about Loverboy's hydro vision

ੈ♡˳ Annotated notes for Loverboy one-shot

ੈ♡˳ Loverboy memes

ੈ♡˳ Kafka ask

ੈ♡˳ Pantalone nsfw

[ruumirmir]

Employee of the Month

really, i dont think half of this should be taken seriously, HOWEVER:

I think loverboy's peakest babygirl moment in all of his career should be singlehandedly getting pantalone to invent the concept of "employee of the month" for the sole reason of having a workplace excuse to spoil and praise him without raising suspicion. 👀 Which I'll set in the timeline Before pantalone becomes the harbinger, and is just a fairly high ranking official at present.

(theres like a whole backstory ive cooked up that my moot is currently writing now so this entire post might make a lot more sense after my requested fic is out lmao)

like yeah,, pantalone eventually does come to realize and notice that Hmmm! This one man is a particularly diligent worker! His excellent workplace charm and wet puppy eyes have captivated me !

Perhaps a little shy to praise.

(lil bro is actively trying to avoid the spotlight in such a line of work)

Celestia knows how many hundreds of fatui are trained and raised in the soldiers way 🙄 With the Tsaritza's mercy the organization will rarely happen upon a handful of sparkly-eyed new recruits that can actually be COMPETENT with the brunt of the logistics, diplomacy and theoretical PAPERWORK that keeps the fatui running.

God knows that harbingers like Pantalone, Pulcinella, and occasionally Arlecchino NEED subordinates behind desks rather than on the field.

So the idea comes to pantalone on a fine sunny day with a stroke of genius !

because the work environment under each harbinger is so Different, you could categorize pantalone to (relatively) have the safest, and most boring work imaginable.

Definitely in which case, job motivation is very..... low. Well not anymore apparently,, in comes loverboy, newly enrolled in the fatui

with a personal vendetta against risking his precious life on the field, who damn well MAKES SURE his work merits and skills direct him towards a cushy job with good pay. and that eventually catches pantalone's attention, whos like

Wow! I wonder how i can get myself to play favorites in my department in broad daylight without it being suspicious... Hmmm...

And then on the first day of the upcoming month, out goes a notice to every subordinate, manager, accountant, secretary and etc etc, about a brand new system set in place! and would you look at that:

Loverboy nearly digs a hole and buries himself on the spot out of embarrassment when he sees a nice framed photo of him hung up at the Northland bank's noticeboard with nice bold letters saying

"Fatuus of the Month"

followed by a nice motivational speech by pantalone that goes a little too into loverboy's personal quirks rather than his excellent contributions to the bank.

Really, it might've only been a little over 1.5 years into his mandated fatui service, but he's already been sent off with a neat bonus.... a small material gift that pantalone bought him, and a strong surge of interest from his fellow colleagues/comrades.

So much for trying to avoid the spotlight :P

also pspsppspsps @eluxcastar would you like some loverboy thoughtposting

[ruumirmir]

Anyone up for some Zhongli content?

So I’ve been thinking about writing a heavy angst-fluff oneshot scenario involving Zhongli x God of Mist! Reader

I had this idea of mine requested to @thesparklingwriter​ who did a wonderful job of writing it out btw! Zhongli enthusiasts are advised to perhaps go check out her blog!

And well, I haven't written any pieces in a long long time, but might as well get back into it.

This idea of mine is basically set during the time of the Archon war. Roughly about a 1500 years ago from present time.

I'll publish out a decently long story from it soon enough.

And although it's a reader fic (ambiguous gender), I've taken a couple liberties to add some personality. Not to mention that I've written it in a second person POV (you/your pronouns)

Reader is the God of Healing and Mists, one of the oldest friends of Zhongli. They're not one to be easily taken down, but alas, in a war of brutality, you can only escape death for so long.

Once upon a time, great many beasts of the sky and wind descended upon Liyue in hopes of challenging the celestial seat of the Geo Archon.

And the night ended with a scene of destruction at the hands of Morax, and a large gaping hole through the reader's torso.

What good is a shield if it cannot protect? What good is the ability to heal if you cannot protect yourself?

Unless... 👀

•

Perhaps reblog with your @? I'll be more than happy to make a tag list for anyone interested on reading when I finish writing it!

[ruumirmir]

Gojo Satoru, the man that you are, had me researching Buddhism and shit

///Jjk chap 236 leaks and spoilers pls begone thankuverymuch

I have never been more deranged in my life of living. And when I say deranged,, I hope everyone involved will enjoy my copium induced girl dinner rant that I cooked up 💥🔥

going through five stages of grief,, about to invent the 6th and 7th one. over Lines on Paper this is my life

Anyways,, so I came across a tweet which started my spiral after I read through these:

jujutsu kaisen

has the potential to create THE arc of all Time ever if,, BY GOING OFF OF SYMBOLISM,,, the plot NAILS this

bc the buddha imagery and symbolism of gojo is already the coldest shit ever when gege cooked with the "throughout heaven and earth, i alone am the honored one"

if this actually happens to some degree

we could have the biggest "WE'RE SO FUCKING BACK" moment in all of manga history

《Gautama Buddha died at the age of 80 in 483 BCE at a place called Kushinagara a town in UP》

thank god we still have 8 more decades left until gojo is FEASIBLY ALLOWED TO DIE AT A SUITABLE AGE AND AFTER A LONG HAPPY LIFE.

ok wait technically 5 more decades since hes close to pushing 30

Raggedy old man. Bros aging 💀

death of an anime man got me actually researching about Gautama Buddha with sincere interest now

《"Mara" is one of the earliest non-human beings to appear in Buddhist scriptures. He is a demon, sometimes called the Lord of Death, who plays a role in many stories of the Buddha and his monks.》

apparently this is the demon equivalent to reflect sukuna's character. hes mostly present in esoteric buddhism

the hand sign,, is same as sukuna's domain expansion here

《In East Asian and Buddhist mythology, Yama,, also known as King Yan/Yan Wang is the King of Hell and a dharmapala (wrathful god) said to judge the dead and preside over the Narakas and the cycle of afterlife saṃsāra.》

In Hinduism,, that's Lord Yama, god of the dead, similarly shown with a Bull as his familiar.

from chinese mythology:

《Yan is portrayed as a large man with a scowling red face, bulging eyes, and a long beard. He wears traditional robes and a judge's cap or a crown which bears the character for "king".》

This cant translate to sukuna's "true form"

Yknow,, the big fucking body with 4 arms and a wooden mask thing on the left side of his face. He definetely IS shown to wear traditional robes.

Now bear with me here, I'm derailing my sanity rn.

yes now THIS is interestinger:

《The spirits of the dead, on being judged by Yan, are supposed to either pass through a term of enjoyment in a region midway between the earth and the heaven of the gods.》

We LITERALLY. have a whole segment of gojo enjoying his time seeing suguru and his other friends who died in an afterlife-kinda setting. We also specifically get a panel of sukuna praising satoru,, passing his judgement,, that we've seen him do to other characters as well [jogo, although that's kinda debatable 💀 since Sukuna kind of. Trashed him]

《-or to undergo their measure of punishment in the nether world. Neither location is permanent and after a time, they return to Earth in new bodies.》

JUMPING UP AND FUCKING DOWN RN. Isnt Kusakabe on standby,, who cultivated an ability to act as a medium and swap/ conduct other people's souls with his own. As i said before,,, SURELYYYYYYY gege wouldnt do this shit without REASON

(it is the funniest shit in the world to type up "Indra god hand gesture" and for gojo fucking satoru's face to pop up in the image and ACTUALLY be linked to a legit discussion on his domain expansion hand sign being referenced from Indra)

ok so, in hinduism,, its "Indra", but in buddhism the same god is translated unto "Sakra"

yknow how it be. Different religions and practices share the same god and the beliefs overlap here and there.

so theres this

《When one Śakra dies, his place is taken by another deity who becomes the new Śakra.》

which is basically the jujutsu kaisen equivalent of people in the gojo clan being born. With the liberty taken of SixEyes + Limitless users taking hundreds of years to be born after deaths of the previous one.

Okay so

"then with his face to the north took seven strides while a white canopy was held over him" is the text referencing buddha's enlightening birth.

the white canopy held over his head is a symbol that he'll achieve nirvana.

《In Buddhism, "Nirvana" is the highest state that someone can attain, a state of enlightenment, meaning a person's individual desires and suffering go away. The origin of the word nirvana relates to religious enlightenment; it comes from the Sanskrit meaning "extinction, disappearance" of the individual to the universal.》

Since we've Already seen that gojo's achieved his state of enlightenment at his first death (by toji)

This can be the second stage where he achieves Nirvana at his second death,,

in the storyline,, gojo is Heavily only recognized and labeled by his powers and strength with the Limitless and the Six eyes that he possesses.

(Literally, it means “blowing out” or “becoming extinguished,” as when a flame is blown out or a fire burns out. nirvana.)

So if somehow,, we've all been theorizing,, if gojo erases that aspect of him. Destroys the aspect that defines him as Gojo Satoru, he'll technically be achieving Nirvana and being born (revived) anew.

which is also sweetening the conclusion of the age old question

"Are you the strongest because youre gojo satoru? Or are you gojo satoru because you're the strongest", that geto had ask him years ago.

Which ig, Also raises the question:

IF, gojo were to sacrifice his SixEyes and Limitless in his pact of revival (details to be pondered upon later), would this count as a Legitmate "death" with relevance to the world's balance being re-altered, and Also resetting the cycle for another user to be born?

Or idk maybe I'm just tripping balls <3

Goodnight everynyan. Let's awaken to a day where Satoru Gojo comes to live amongst us once again. 🕊

[ruumirmir]

uurrmmmm escuse me  so. how relevant are character X oc ships? b.  becaus e

Kaveh x Male Oc............. it is so wonderful and personal to me. (the male oc is literally the next best thing for me to self insert into because i would never disrespect alhaitham by selfinserting thru him. also bc the autism king is too far away from my perception to write properly. my apologies.) i would i would like to make. a fanfiction of Prince Kaveh and my Villain Archmage Oc. Would ya’ll read it 🥺👉👈? ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh im thinking  im thinking so hard. Im gonna write it. im gonna do it.