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#( i love that it started off with Otoya~
xxyumeno · 2 years
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I was going to be productive today with working on the new blog some more but... ... ... I saw that the Uta no Prince-sama Maji Love STARISH Tours now on HiDIVE. Bless~ I love this series so damn much, even though I don’t talk about it much~
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miyukisu · 24 days
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1 | Awaken, My Love .ᐟ
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❤︎ | Ever since you two got together, he discovered some of the things that he's actually really really into ╰ feat. various blue lock characters x afab! reader
tags - both sfw and ns/fw headcanons (under the cut), mostly vanilla stuff, tit fucking, dirty talk, pussy eating
minors do not interact
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You know that I love you // So let me into your heart
— movie nights Movies in general used to be boring for them. You sit down for 2 hours and then what? There were other forms of entertainment out there and they preferred that. However, once you invited them to watch a movie one night, they couldn't refuse. They sat down, albeit reluctantly, and found that the movie was only slightly interesting. But they did like how you cuddled with them under a blanket and how you would comment every minute on what was happening on screen. Movies are still unamusing, but you were more than enough to keep them awake.
Bachira, Barou, Otoya, Hiori, Sendou, Lorenzo, Nagi ❤︎
— public displays of affection It was cringey when they first thought about it. Wouldn't people judge you for being so touchy and lovey-dovey out in broad daylight? But then you started holding their arm while navigating through crowded places. It was fine; they wouldn't want you getting lost anyway. As time went on, they just found themselves reaching out to you on their own. They'll just surprise themselves one day that their arm's already around your waist or that they're already kissing your forehead when they see some other guy looking at you too much.
Barou, Chigiri, Rin, Sae, Karasu, Kaiser, Raichi, Kiyora ❤︎
— terms of endearment They found it a bit childish as if only younger couples were doing that. You had a name, they had a name—what's the point of coming up with something else to call out each other? As much as they tried, the petnames never rolled off their tongue well. It always left a weird aftertaste. But his whole outlook changed when he heard you utter it accidentally. As you apologized for the slip of the tongue, he was internally malfunctioning from how adorable and heartwarming it felt to be called by something other than their given name.
Nagi, Karasu, Barou, Ness, Kurona, Gagamaru, Niko ❤︎
Sleeping with the moon and the stars // I know where you've been
— tit fucking Sure, they understood the appeal. But why waste time on that when perfectly good pussy was right in front of them? Hell, even your mouth would do more wonders. But you like to surprise them—keep them on their toes and such. So after sucking him off, you thought it would be a great idea to put his aching cock between your breasts. He was annoyed by it at first, but soon as he felt the softness and silkiness of your flesh—he was smitten. It was a sensation never felt before and now... he craves for it.
Isagi, Kunigami, Rin, Oliver, Sae, Gagamaru, Raichi ❤︎
— dirty talk Truth be told, they're just really shy. They can't fathom the idea of spilling out such filthy words and hearing it for themselves. But there came a time when he couldn't help but blurt out the dirty thoughts running through his mind. It caused your pussy to wantonly clench down on him and it sent him to heaven. Maybe, just maybe, he'd consider throwing away his pride for a moment if it meant experiencing that feeling once more. Oh, but if you're doing the dirty talk, then he's all ears.
Isagi, Nagi, Reo, Karasu, Yukimiya, Hiori ❤︎
— pussy eating Before meeting you, they were fully convinced that they were a receiver through and through. Nothing beats a blowjob after a particularly stressful day. Or so they thought. But why was it oddly liberating to lap up your pussy like there was no tomorrow? They found it strange that this was somehow more arousing than receiving. They experience a reluctant change of heart. They're not ready to admit that maybe they're more of a giver... he'll settle on being a switch for now.
Bachira, Nagi, Rin, Otoya, Oliver, Kaiser, Lorenzo ❤︎
©kzyluvr do not repost/reupload/translate any of my works on other platforms
╰ author's note more headcanons for blue lock or a different fandom? hmmm...
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kvrokasaa · 4 months
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The Morning After
Includes: Isagi, Otoya, Reo, Chigiri, and Rin
Cw: Suggestive, Reo's mentions reader's hair being kinda long, not proofread. 1.4k words
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Yoichi wakes up to the soft glare of the sun filtering through the blinds. He blinks a few times, slowly becoming aware of his surroundings. The events of last night come rushing back to him - the laughter, the touches, the connection. He turns his head slightly and sees you lying next to him, still peacefully asleep.
A soft, almost inaudible chuckle leaves his lips while he takes in the serenity of the scene. Your hair is sprawled out on the pillow, your arms clutching the poor thing for dear life.
Cute.
Carefully, Isagi slips out of bed, trying not to wake you. He stretches, feeling the pleasant soreness from last night's activities. He moves quietly, deciding to make coffee and prepare a simple breakfast. As he waits for the coffee, he glances back towards the bedroom, his thoughts drifting. Last night felt different than any other one-night stand. It felt special. There was a connection between you both. It makes him feel both excited and nervous about what could come next.
You stir awake at the smell of coffee - the aroma drawing you out of your slumber. You stretch and sit up, the blanket slipping down to your waist.
You notice Isagi in the kitchen - with no shirt on - making breakfast and coffee. You could almost drool at the sight. "Morning," you say softly, your voice a bit raspy from all the moaning and screaming from the night before.
Isagi turns his face lighting at the sight of you in his shirt and nothing else. "Good morning," he replies, his voice gentle. "I made some coffee. Want a cup?"
You nod and reach out to grab the cup filled with coffee. Isagi speaks as you put in your desired creams and sugars. "Last night was amazing," he started, "I'd love to see where this can go." And of course, you have no other answer than yes.
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You wake up with a start, the early morning light filtering through the curtains. As the events from last night come rushing back, you feel a mix of exhilaration and anxiety. You turn your head to see Otoya still asleep beside you, his face relaxed and peaceful. For a moment, you just watch him, trying to sort through your tangled thoughts and feelings.
You've known Otoya since you were kids, but his reputation as a player makes your heart ache with uncertainty. Was last night just another fleeting moment for him? Does he have a girlfriend? The doubts gnaw at you, making it hard to breathe.
Carefully, you slip out of bed, trying not to wake him. You move quietly around the room, gathering your clothes and getting dressed as quickly and silently as possible. You hope to leave before he wakes up, to spare yourself any potential heartbreak.
Just as you reach the door, you hear a rustle behind you. You freeze, your heart pounding.
"Leaving so soon?" Otoya's voice is soft, but it startles you. You turn to see him standing behind you, his eyes half-open but focused on you. "I-I should go," you stammer, not meeting his eyes. "I'm sorry, I just..." You trail off.
"I'm scared. You have a reputation and I don't want to get hurt. What if you have another girl? What if last night didn't mean anything to you?" You voice your thoughts. It's a drawl, you think. Either your friendship is ruined forever, or you let him break your heart in silence.
He steps closer, his eyes searching yours. "I've known you since childhood, you think I'd use you like that?" His voice is soft, filled with seriousness you rarely hear from him. You don't respond. You know that he wouldn't do that, don't you?
"Last night wasn't just some fling. It meant everything to me. You mean everything to me. I love you." That got you to look up at him.
"But you've never said anything." "I just realized," he answers honestly. "I know that you probably don't believe me." His hand comes up to cup your cheek, "Just give me some time. Let's figure this out together."
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Reo woke up with a warm sensation spreading through his chest. He blinked sleepily, his gaze shifting to the figure beside him. You looked so peaceful, your hair cascading down over the pillow in gentle waves. A soft smile curved his lips against your neck, trailing kisses down to your collarbone. The touch was gentle, reverent almost, as if he couldn't get enough of you.
He felt a surge of affection, a deep longing that bordered on obsession. You stirred, a small sound escaping your lips, and he couldn't help but smile wider. Being this close to you, sharing these intimate moments, filled with a sense of contentment he hadn't known before.
Your bodies are entwined, fitting together like puzzle pieces. He traced patterns on your skin, each touch a silent declaration of his affection.
As you both exchanged whispered words and soft laughter, he couldn't help but marvel at the connection you both share. It's more than the physical attraction; it's a bond that transcends words, a silent understanding that you belong together.
Time seemed to stand still as you lost yourselves in each other, forgetting the outside world exists. In this moment, all that matters is the warmth from your skin, the rhythm of your breaths syncing in perfect harmony.
Reo knows he's falling deeper, that this isn't just a fleeting attraction. You've become his everything, a beacon of light in his dull world. And as you lay there, basking in the afterglow of your shared passion, he couldn't help but feel grateful for every moment with you.
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As the morning light filters through the curtains, Chigiri finds himself waking up next to you. The memories of last night flood back, filling him with a warm sense of contentment. He can't help but smile as he recalls how you finally confessed your feelings to him, through drunken words and moans.
Your peaceful sleeping face is a sight to behold, and he can't resist reaching out to gently brush a strand of your hair away. The way you sleepily smile makes his heart race with affection. It's moments like this that make him realize just how much he cares for you.
As he lies there, basking in the afterglow of your shared intimacy, he can't help but reflect on how far you've both come. From the first day you helped him with his leg injury to volunteering to monitor and do regular check-ups at Blue Lock, your bond has only grown stronger.
He knows this is just the beginning of something intimate between you two. With you by Chigiri's side, he feels like he can conquer anything. And as he watches you stir awake, a smile playing on your lips, he knows that he wouldn't want it any other way.
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As the morning sun filters through the curtains, you find yourself waking up beside Rin. The soft warmth of his body against yours reminds you of the night before, where passion and tenderness intertwined in a dance only lovers could understand.
Rin stirs beside you, his eyes fluttering to meet yours. There's a moment of hesitation, a silent acknowledgment of the unspoken emotions between you. Then, with a gentle smile, he reaches out to brush a strand of hair from your face.
"You're still here," he murmurs, his voice carrying a mix of surprise and relief.
You nod your head, not knowing if you should leave or not. "Yeah." Rin immediately notices your tone mixed with uncertainty and hesitation. "I know I said some things before...about you distracting me from soccer," he begins, his gaze searching yours for understanding.
Your eyes trail down to his hand, his fingers climbing onto your hand. "You're passionate about soccer, Rin. I know that. But you don't get to shut out everything else. We can find a balance."
He exhales slowly as if a weight has been lifted off his shoulders. "I want that, too." He admits, pulling you closer into a warm embrace.
The room is filled with a comfortable silence, broken only by the soft sound of your breathing and gentle rustles of movement as Rin lays his head on your chest. He hums in contentment when he hears the sound of your heartbeat. And with each shared whisper of love and longing, it becomes clear that despite his initial reluctance, he's fully committed to making things work between you.
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perrywrites · 11 months
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Absentmindedly murmuring that you want him inside of you during his practice;
NSFW 
Includes; Isagi, Hiori, Bachira
Part 2 (Chigiri, Reo) and part 3 (Kaiser, Barou) and part 4 (Nagi, Shidou, Kunigami) and part 5 (Sae, Rin, Karasu, Otoya, Yukimiya)
Isagi: it’s time for his break during practice, and he’s gulping down water, adam’s apple bobbing as he hydrates himself. He’s loosely aware of your dazed stare as you continue looking at him from the bench, after all you haven’t been very subtle in staring at him throughout practice - and although he could ignore it on field, not so much off of it. He’s still gulping down water, about to go towards you afterwards just for a quick chat, and to ask you why you’ve been staring at him so much, unusually quietly. Then you say something that makes him freeze up, setting fire to his face and nearly killing him in the process. “I want you inside of me…” you mumble that, sighing in a manner as if he had romanced you. The surprise proves near fatal, and he’s choking on his water, turning away from you as his ears burn up fiercely. What? What? Did you actually just say that? Or has he somehow actually gone crazy now? Some sort of brain fatigue? An answer to his unasked question comes in the form of your lighthearted giggle, as you apologize casually for letting your thoughts slip out. That doesn’t do anything to calm the fire heating up his skin, heart thundering throughout his body, especially not when your eyes are still just as dazed when you look up at him, all lovesick and opaque with longing. “You can’t just say that,” he says, voice quiet and strained, face still heavily flushed. You giggle, and tease him a bit more, before he goes back to practice. Except now he can’t focus on anything anymore. All he can think about are your sweet words, that lovesick gaze of yours, and the softness of your plush walls. His mind is failing, and you’ve proven to be a magnificent distraction. The only thing on his mind right now is how badly he wants to sink into you and fuck you hard for even daring to say that outloud. He wants to pin you down and have his way with you, make you so dumb on his cock, fill you up - and oh god. He’s clenching his hands, flexing any muscles in his body that he can, trying to divert the blood away from his cock, because his shorts were starting to feel a little too tight. Fuck, look at what you’ve done. Are you proud of yourself? You’re not going to be getting away with this, you know that, right? Why did you think it was a good idea to tease him like this during practice, make him want you so badly? Was last night not enough? Just wait until the end of practice. He’ll be pouncing on you with a growl, dragging you somewhere private he can pound some fucking sense into you. Don’t bother trying to run away, you know he’ll catch you.
Hiori: he finds himself raising an amused eyebrow as he walks towards you during his break, noting how you’re still looking at him, all dreamy and dazed, gaze thick with longing. He knows more than well enough the meaning of that stare, your expressions always give away far too much, but he doesn’t call you out on it. Instead, he asks you lightly if something’s wrong, taking sips of his water. He freezes before he can go in for a third sip, some water spilling out from the top of the bottle at his sudden pause. Did he hear you right? Did you actually just say that? He blinks, looking at you, and his eyes narrow darkly when he catches that spacey fuzzy look on your face. How do you manage to look so innocent and corruptible despite just saying such a perverse thing? He doesn’t understand it, no matter how many times he thinks about it, but what he does know is how that spaced out look on your face never fails to stir sinful desires within him, cock twitching in his pants as his body heats up. On the surface, he looks calm, as always, nothing amiss - but his eyes are clouded over deeply, and his jaw is tense. You love to test his self-restraint, don’t you? For some reason, when you two first started dating, you seemed to have the impression that he doesn’t yearn, doesn’t have a sexual appetite, and it was amusing for him to prove you wrong again and again, take you by surprise - because every time you’d be befuddled by the fact that he wants you, and that he wants you badly. That’s why you’re capable of saying something so inviting so carelessly, right? Even right now, you don’t know a single thing that’s running through his mind, do you? How he wants to watch your eyes turn all dewy, tears pooling as you whimper and sob out his name beneath him, face flushed and lips quivering, an expression only for him on your face, make you vulnerable and helpless underneath as he loves you to death. He wants to do all of those things and more, make you so weak and useless, cherish you and make you take him until you break. But, he doesn’t do any of that. Instead, he smiles impassively, walking over to you as he pats your head, but when he speaks, there’s something veiled in his controlled voice. “Don’t worry, ya only have to wait a little longer, okay?”
Bachira: throughout practice he catches your stare, noting your listless gaze as your eyes follow him run and score across the field. He’s not oblivious, though, he can tell well enough the simmering desire sitting heavy and darkly in your seemingly empty and unthinking eyes. “What’s with that look?” he asks, all toothy smirk and teasing eyes as he drinks from his bottle, eager to badger you during his small water break. But it seems like you’re a little too out of it, feeling a little too bold, because you respond bluntly, murmuring quietly that you were thinking about wanting him inside of you. He’s taken aback at your unintentional provocation, blinking away the shock as he smiles, amused. You really will be the death of him, won’t you? He tries lightheartedly teasing you, asking you what made you so impatient that you couldn’t even wait until you two were alone to tell him this, and when you say that neither of you would be able to resist right now if he got you alone, he damn near loses his mind. He can feel the heat spreading through his body, itching to do something to you as you continue looking up at him all dazed and yearning, and he tells you that exactly so, voice all husky. With a smile as normal as ever, except his eyes are glinting in a way that sends fire down your core. A whimper bubbles up your throat. “I want you to do something to me so badly, you have no clue,” you say, whimpery voice bursting out, and you’ve done it. His eyes darken needily, smile faltering, and he quickly ditches his towel and water bottle; practice be damned. Hand on your arm, he pulls you up and begins lightly dragging you somewhere else, somewhere isolated, somewhere he can fuck you and make you cry so hard on his cock you lose your voice. That’s what you get for tempting him. This is what you want, right? He’ll give it all to you, don’t worry. Just be good and submissive for him, spread those legs for him and leave your body all pliant under his hungry touch. He’ll fill you up, and he’ll keep filling you up until you’re satisfied - or rather, until he’s satisfied. Because you’ve lit a fire in him that you absolutely can’t handle - but don’t worry - he’ll hold you and love you even when you become a babbling mess on his cock, so let him break you apart right now. You’re the one that started it this time anyways, so he doesn’t have to hold back, right?
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okkotsuus · 2 months
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Hey, just requesting. How r u? Can I request... Barou Shouei, Karasu Tabito, Shidou Ryusei, Raichi Jingo x GN! Ahodere! Reader (Ahodere: Someone who's very friendly, kind-hearted, and high-spirited, but completely stupid when it comes to romance. They're super dense and usually mistake romantic gestures towards them as something else. Matter of fact, they can even be oblivious to their own feelings. They're like Bakaderes, but Bakaderes are more naive and childish.) Genre: crack, #Save[Various], Reader is as dumb as a rock when it comes to romance - [Various] gets encouraged by their friends (Any group of Blue Lockers of your choice) to finally make a move on Reader (or they encourage themselves with their friends watching). After practice, they finally flirt with Reader. Fairly easy right? Not when your crush is denser than a rock. It's honestly embarrassing to watch.
DENSITY (bllk) !
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features: barou shouei. karasu tabito. shidou ryusei.
contents: pining. very fluffy. crack. dense reader. 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂 karasu. i'm down bad for karasu. shidou is his own warning tbh.
notes: i'm good, how are you? i got lazy and didn't do raichi but i hope i did this the way you wanted, thank you for requesting :))
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barou shouei
it was no surprise that barou was incredibly hesitant when it came to romance. he was possibly just as dense as you when it came to the subject.
if it weren't for bachira noticing the way that his gaze would stick to you, how little he shouted in your direction: it would have gone unnoticed. all it took was just a week's worth of constant pestering from his teammates to make him nearly start clawing at the walls.
he was so pissed that they had something to hold over him, someone to torment him with. meanwhile, you were so easily unaffected, it made him question if you even held any affection for him.
but barou is not a doubting man, he doesn't get nervous over something as simple as the idea of being rejected. so, begrudgingly, he ends up walking your way after a long practice: wanting to just get it over with.
a few 'woops' and cheers sound behind him, likely bachira and isagi. he only flips them the birdo over his shoulder before stopping in front of you.
"hey, y/n. go out with me." his voice is slightly rough, eyes narrowed. he may never find himself getting nervous over the most simple things, but barou swears his heart speeds up just slightly.
your eyes widen as your head tilts to the side, brows pinching in confusion. "oh? i'd love to hang out some time! shall we invite the rest of the team and maybe go bowling?" the words nearly have him letting out a shout, eye twitching.
he sighs, gritting his teeth. barou can feel the entire team staring him down, too far away to actually hear the words but still watching. "no, not with those peasants. just us." the man grumbles, the slightest hue of pink rising to the tips of his ears as his eyes hurriedly look off to the side.
then, your eyes widened, a smile crossing your face. "am i getting a surprise for something??" you just sound so damn excited that he can't help but internally groan.
strong hands grab your shoulders, hauling you closer. barou's face is dangerously close, his brows are furrowed and a vein pops out of his forehead. "dammit you moron, i'm hitting on you..!"
"but you're only holding me, not hitting..?" he lets out a loud exasperated shout, turning and storming off while the team watches in awe.
it seems the barou will have to try again another day, he ran out of confidence patience.
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karasu tabito
karasu has never been one to have trouble with finding someone, much less with being able to attract them. he was a pretty boy, tall and lean, even had a talent to boot.
but you, you evaded his charms so easily. it made him feel like a damn fool. which leads to him ranting to otoya in the locker rooms after practice.
"i swear man, it's like they don't even see me as a man, ugh..." he trails off with a sigh, eyes closing as his head leans back against the lockers. sweat drips down his face before his eyes open to look back at his friend.
otoya lets out a wicked cackle, amused by his best friend's misery. "then ya gotta do somethin' real bold, make 'em remember!" he offers, smirking as karasu's eyes widen like he had an epiphany.
the taller boy jumps up, shouting a thanks as he rushes out of the locker room. he nearly tumbles over as he skids to a stop in front of you, chest heaving.
karasu backs you up against a wall, eyes narrowing as a smooth smirk splits his pretty pink lips. "wanna get out of here, angel..?" his voice is like honey, thick and sweet.
but you don't even flush, no sense of surprise or nervousness, just that same dumb smile. "are you getting tired of the facility? i'd love to show you around the town at the foot of the mountain!" your words are chipper, but there's no sense of truly understanding what he had actually meant in them.
he swears his heart stops for a moment, eye twitching as his mouth hangs open in shock. but he decides to double down, hands resting against your waist as he leans ever-closer.
"no, but i'm awfully tired of you playing coy..." there's a slight rumble to his voice, convinced you were playing hard-to-get. karasu didn't believe that someone could ever be this dense. especially not with how obvious he's made things.
but you just blink at him, lips parting into an 'o'. he feels his heart stop as he realized you really are just that dumb, he would have to literally spell it out for you.
"i want you, in every sense of the word."
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shidou ryusei
ryusei had never been one to falter when chasing the things he wanted. he has never backed down. for the longest time, all he'd desired had been soccer: scoring and winning. but that was until his eyes saw you.
like a predator he found himself observing your every moment, quieter than before. he lingered around you while in blue lock, as if someone would snatch you away.
every goal her scored has pink irises flitting in your directing, a wicked smirk parting his lips when he hears your praises. soccer had never felt so euphoric before.
he begins to crave the feeling, like an addict. ryusei scores goal after goal, getting hits from the little gasps of awe you give him so generously. he finds his cheeks flushed hot pink, eyes nearly rolling back into his head.
it's at that moment he decides he can't stand the thought of ever being without that sensation. so, after practice, only with a few wishes of his failure from rin, he decides to strike.
ryusei finds you easily, as if he was attuned to it. he doesn't introduce himself, just wraps his arms around you from behind, chin propping against your shoulder. "i have never wanted to score anything more than a goal, until you pranced so happily into my life..."
your head tilts back to look at him, a confused look on your face. you show no signs of fluster, expression completely neutral. "thank you?" your voice is perplexed, but still warm.
in that second ryusei realize how much he desires to see your facade crumble. how he wants to see you break and finally realize his intentions. he years to see your face painted in red with wide eyes locked on him: and only him.
and he never loses sight of his goals.
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okkotsuus 24
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unluckilyimnot · 5 months
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Hii love your writing sm! Can you write how would rin,sae,karasu and otoya react if them and the reader went on a date/stroll around the park and a lady who is selling roses approaches them and asks them if they woud buy one for the reader??
roses – rin, sae, karasu
m.list | rules
Note: hiii thank you for your request ! Here it is hihi for the fun fact, it happened to me once on a date with a guy (he didn’t say yes btw, it was like our second date something like that) sorry I couldn't think of eita's reaction ;-;
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Rin Itoshi
Rin blushed a little and if he could, he would’ve turned his face away for you not to see this. You patted his arm sweetly before locking your arm with his. You were sure that his nervous self would panics at this situation.
“Sorry ma’am, that’s maybe too soon for that –” but Rin cut you off.
“Here.” He handed cash to the lady and she let you choose one of them with a smile.
You let go off his arm while looking a little. Your eyes met with hers and she flashes you a big smile. “You find a good one here.” she said with a wink.
You could feel your cheeks heat up as well and wave her goodbye with your fresh flower in hand. It smells so good, you were kinda sure it was from her garden.
Looking up to Rin, you pushed it under his nose ass well. “It really smells good.”
Sniffing a little, Rin only nods, still not looking at you. You almost started to feel bad.
“Thank you.” you whispered, laying your head on his arm. It wasn’t early in the relationship in fact, you just knew Rin was uncomfortable with this type of things. You never expected him to say yes. That for sure made your heart flutter.
She was totally right, you had to keep him.
Sae Itoshi
As soon as the lady came closer, Sae turned her off with a strict gaze. He’s not into this kind of stuff anyway, and it’s not a flower that can reflect how much he loves you. It fades away at some point, and he wishes to offer you the best things in life, not something that dies anyway.
He was about to go on with his day and forget about it already when the lady spoke to you.
“If he doesn’t even consider it, maybe you should find someone better.”
“Maybe you’re right.” you added, giggling with her to tease him a little.
You forget for a little how Sae takes things seriously. If you think that you have to reconsider his love over a flower, he’ll make sure to prove you wrong. Mostly her, in fact.
Turning around on his heels, he looked dead in her eyes and said, without even thinking twice this time, “I’ll take them all.”
You gasped before laughing out loud this time, tears already showing in your eyes. You grabbed his arm, shaking your head.
“Come on Sae, I’m kidding it’s fine !”
“No. I take it.”
That’s how you end up with around fifty roses and you were already thinking about where to pt them around your place .
Tabito Karasu
The second Tabito saw the old lady, it clicked in his head. He just had to find something to keep you occupied for a few minutes. 
Bringing back the fact that you were hungry a while ago, he let you wait in the line for soame waffle and ice cream, faking that he had to call someone back quickly before he could come back. You didn’t ask anything about it, it happens quite often with his job. You understand that. 
Little did you know, he rushed to the old lady the second your eyes fell on your phone. She wasn’t expecting him, he could tell when he heard her gasp.
“Sorry I surprised you, but he would really like one for my s/o without them knowing,” he explained, eyes wide open enough to make her giggle. She nodded of course, handing him two flowers.
“The second is a gift, they’re very lucky to have you, young man.” Her tender smile, showing him how age marked her yet never touched her kindness, made him soft as he thanked her with a warm smile as well. He’ll make sure to let you know. 
You covered your mouth in shock when he tapped your shoulder before handing you the two roses. You didn’t expect him to find her himself for you.
“You didn’t have to !”
“One is from her, it’s a gift.” he chuckles, greatly appreciating the kiss you laid on his cheek to thank him.
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I hope you liked it !
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kenyummy · 4 months
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LOOKING OUT FOR YOU — KARASU TABITO
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SYNOPSIS: karasu tabito has always looked out for you. when you meet his best friend, otoya, that fact still does not change.
note: lol sorry guys i felt a little silly
wc ;; 2.5k
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You have known Karasu Tabito since you have been in diapers.
It's always been a known fact. Your mothers met each other at the hospital, became friends, and eventually, you two met. That fateful day, you met Karasu Tabito and your life has never been void of him since.
At age three, you two went out to a waterpark and that was the first time he kissed you.
(It wasn't really a kiss—you accidentally fell on top of him after sliding down a waterslide, he promised he'd catch you, and he did—his mouth just happened to land on yours). You were so disgusted you started to cry—he gagged and ran away.
At age five and a half, you both had your first sleepover. He had a big scary dog that was almost as big as you were and scared you half to death. You were so terrified of the thing you refused to let go of the bottom of his stupid purple Megatron shirt.
You spent the entire night sleeping by his side, and he never once softened his grip on you—it was the only thing that lulled you to sleep. Your mom still had photos of you clinging onto him like it was life or death.
At age twelve, you two entered middle school together. You've never spent a day without him—so it was quite strange when you were forced to enter a strange, new class—and even weirder when your female classmates gave you both googly eyes and always giggled whenever you were around. You never really understood what they meant by this—and to this day, you still don't.
You and Karasu Tabito have known each other since you two were able to walk, and because of this fact, you've never once noticed the way he looks at you.
The soft stares, small smiles (not those stupid, cocky smirks that he holds when he's out on the field—but rather, a grin that curls up on his lips and makes his cheeks grow pink), and the thoughtful, almost unnoticeable actions he takes only for you.
You've never seen it—not now, not never, is what he's hoping. If there is one thing Karasu Tabito shall never do, is tell you what he's done. He'll wait, maybe for a day he will see you stare at him with just as much fondness, or when your touch will linger on his upper arm for a minute too long.
He's always been good at analyzing people—and when he's known you for so long, you've surely become no exception. It was a habit you hated so much, but one he never seemed to be able to get rid of—only able to hide, for the sake of your wellbeing. He's grown soft, he thinks, every single night after he's lying alone in his bed and staring blankly up at the ceiling. He has grown soft for you, his best friend since childhood. But that isn't so much of a bad thing, he thinks again.
He doesn't mind all that much. 
The crow, once wild and rowdy, is content with the preening it receives from its owner—and learns to love its life trapped inside the golden cage. He will wait, patiently, for the day you would fall for him—at least, that is what he was originally planning to do.
At age eighteen, he introduced you to his best friend, Otoya Eita. A notorious football player, playboy, and womanizer. There is a good reason Karasu had waited so long to introduce his two closest friends together, and that is because Otoya had quite a history with all of Karasu's female friends. 
He's told him to quit it, to stop—but it's never been as serious as it is now.
"Seriously man, don't with her." Karasu sits beside his friend with narrowed eyes and a frown. Otoya's expression is nonchalant as ever, except with a singular brow raised in question.
"What's got you so pissed? I didn't even say anything."
"I know you. Don't, dude. She's different, okay? I don't care about whatever happened with the others, but you seriously need to lay off."
Otoya raises his hands in mock defence, half-lidded eyes widening ever-so-slightly. "Alright. Promise. I won't do anything."
Karasu raises a brow, staring at his whistling buddy from the corner of his eye—he couldn't help but doubt him. Still, he was his closest friend from Blue Lock, and he should do well to trust that said friend—even if Karasu Tabito should know better.
He really should've known better.
As soon as Otoya caught sight of you—he slid next to you, ever so casually—with his phone stuck out and a small smile playing on his lips—asking for your number. You were shocked, of course, and Tabito had no shortage of criticism regarding his green-striped friend to speak to you—still, he was pretty cute, and pretty charming, with that grin.
So, despite your better judgement, and to Karasu's horror—you momentarily forget his words and nod—still in shocked silence—and pass him your phone. 
Karasu doesn't think he's ever seen Otoya that happy. Still, you don't look uncomfortable—even with that gross, stupid man pressed right to your side—so Karasu holds his tongue and simply chews down, hard, on the inside of his cheek to stop himself from cursing his friend out.
The crow introduces the both of you together, and it does not take long at all before, he, who was sitting on the opposite side of the table from you two, becomes the so-called third wheel.
Karasu Tabito could only stare in silence as you and Otoya, surprisingly, held a decent conversation.
Tabito nearly socked Eita in the face when he slid his arm around you and winked—a cheesy, stupid action that could make even the most romantic author gag in horror.
Even so, you smile—and Tabito's heart drops to his stomach.
...
Karasu had mostly forgotten about this moment for a good week—choosing to just enjoy your presence after that. However, after that week of peace, he was rudely reminded just how persistent Otoya could be with girls.
"Otoya... is a nice guy." You point at your phone, showing it to your best friend with a smile. Your cheeks are flushed pink as you type back a response to his message—but it's half-written and unsent when Karasu snatches the device out of your hands.
He's never seen something so disgusting. It's vile. It's horrible. It's so gross.
"What the fuck?" He curses absentmindedly, eyes wide with disgusted shock as he reads over your conversations. At first, it was about Karasu and both your friendships with him—but those conversations soon turned into deeper, personal talks that you'd never shared with anybody but him. 
You try and grab at your device—he pulls that stupid move where he holds it up higher than you can reach—you practically fall into his arms trying to grab the phone, "Tabito!! Give it back!!"
"Are you serious?" He looks down at you with furrowed brows and lips pulled taut downwards. He steadies you with a hand on your shoulder, eyes narrowed sharply. "I told you not to fall for this. Didn't I tell you about what he does to girls? I told you not to talk to him!"
Before this, you've never gotten truly angry at him. Sure, you'd fight—but not even an hour later, either one of you would come back and apologise for whatever petty thing had transpired in the fight. That was just how your friendship was, and he never thought it would change.
Not until now, that is.
You look up at him with a deep frown and an angry stare—not the kittenish one that makes him laugh and ruffle your hair, but a different type of stare—where you are trying to dig knives into his skull and he thinks all the breath has been stolen from his lungs, "Why do you always do this? You always act like this whenever I try and talk to a guy—but this time, you're really acting like a fool! He's your friend, shouldn't you approve more than the past, oh I don't know, seven?!"
His wide-eyed shock is an opening for you to grab your phone back—so you do, and take a good few steps back.
I'm just... trying to look out for you... However, his thoughts go unspoken in his stupor.
Your voice is quieter now—arms folded underneath your chest and clearly avoiding his gaze, "I think you should go... Tabito. I'll talk to you later."
You murmur and walk away—with each step you take, he thinks he hears his heart shatter a little more inside his chest.
...
He slumps down on his desk with his head in his hands. He doesn't know what to do. He feels so stupid. He hadn't even realised it himself—had he really been so disapproving of all those guys that you'd stopped talking to them completely? And he didn't even know?
He feels more selfish than ever.
He feels sick, actually.
"Hey."
This voice is not one he'd like to hear right now. The source of his problems and pain—Otoya. Karasu groans and doesn't raise his gaze—his chest starts to hurt. "Go away."
He doesn't hear footsteps, so Karasu assumes he does not follow his demand. His thoughts are proven correct when Otoya speaks again, "She told me about whatever happened before."
Karasu clenches his jaw hard to stop himself from speaking. He feels like even more of a piece of shit. He just had to bring it up, didn't he? If he didn't introduce you two, this wouldn't have even happened, anyway. Maybe he should keep his lives separate next time—in whatever life he would live next.
"I know she's your friend and all, and you're super worried about her because of that—but I promise I won't do anything."
Those words make Karasu lift his gaze—tired eyes from the lack of sleep he got last night make his despair abundantly obvious. Still, Otoya's nonchalant expression that he always has plastered on his face does not budge an inch. "I promise you before, too. I won't do anything. I swear. I really like her. Like a lot. I swear, I won't hurt her. If I do, you can beat my ass, and I'll take it. So don't be petty like this, okay?"
The words don't soothe the ache in his chest.
Those words he spoke before, just before Otoya had met you—Karasu was worried about this exact scenario happening. But thinking back on it now—was he even worried about you?
He finds himself doubting it. In fact, it feels so much more natural to say that he was worried about himself. That he'd get hurt like this if this happened.
The lack of response from Karasu gives Otoya the answer he was looking for—the last thing he hears as Otoya walks away is an annoyed sigh.
Karasu is, once again, left alone in his room. 
He really wants to collapse and just never wake up. He hates this.
Karasu Tabito really is a selfish man. He wants you all to himself yet never tells you—he truly is the worst man alive.
I... just want you.
That's all. That's all he knows.
His chest aches even more and he thinks his heart may just go beating out of his chest. He grits his teeth, hard, and clenches his fists over his face. 
The crow in the golden cage is afraid to let go—so in such an act of desperation, it grabs onto its owner's arm—clinging and screeching before they can possibly move away.
He is selfish. You're all his heart has ever known—and you are all he wants. He thought he could wait and everything would turn out fine—but now, he sees that he was so, so wrong.
...
He'd made up his mind. He couldn't wait any longer. He had to tell you. Otherwise, these feelings would rot away in the back of his mind forever and whatever was left after that—and Karasu would die, simply unfulfilled and empty, lacking the love that is you.
The lingering stares, the small touches a bit too close to be friends, the words whispered into your ears late at night when you come to him in tears—all of that can't be for naught. 
This couldn't all be for nothing.
He has to tell you. It's now, or never. 
He finds himself running down the street in low-hanging pyjama pants and a black tank top—it's cold, really cold on his tanned skin—but he can hardly feel the snow pricking at his skin as his slippers make contact with the damp concrete ground.
He has to tell you.
He has to tell you.
Otherwise—
He looks around frantically for the spare key your parents keep outside your house. Underneath the potted plant. Right.
He effortlessly lifts the giant pot of aloe vera, and cracks open your door, silently—the first thing he hears is the loud blasting of corny Christmas music, and the sound of your voice laughing along to a song sung by the Whoville residents.
He has to tell you.
His breathing picks up, and he runs forward—however, Tabito is stopped in his tracks, by another voice.
It is Otoya.
If this is truly what heartbreak feels like, then Karasu Tabito is not sure why humans even bother to fall in love. Maybe it is a primal, instinctual reaction that has no logical explanation or meaning to look into—it is simply a blessing, or curse, of nature that cannot be stopped or ignored.
Love is an unexplainable thing. 
It makes you feel so many strange things. Foreign, unnatural, and most of all—weird. Love is really, really weird.
It makes you wish to cry, then smile as far as you possible can. It makes your stomach twist with butterflies and makes you have the inexplicable urge to press your lips together with another person. An act of love only shown by humans. An act of love that the crow could never have.
Love makes you selfish, soft, and weak.
But love can also make you giving, tough, and strong.
Love makes Karasu Tabito walk away.
Love makes Karasu Tabito leave you, with the words silent and dead in his mouth.
Even as the cold winter air nips at his nose and he feels like his stomach is trying to collapse in on itself, Karasu Tabito still feels love. This sort of love is so inexplicably strong and all-consuming—a love that he has always felt for you.
The kind of love that will set you free.
Perhaps the crow had dug his talons too deep into its owner—and now, it was left, stuck alone in that golden cage with blood shining on its claws and silent.
Now, it must fly away.
Karasu's always looked out for you—this time, he thinks, maybe, this is the best for both of you.
You looked so happy. You've never looked that happy with him. The thought makes his heart ache and his thoughts jumble up. He stands in the snow—his loose, ungelled hair falls down his neck and snowflakes look like glitter in his deep purple hair.
He really does love you, and that's why he lets you go.
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© ILIVERAEE 2024
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sanaexus · 18 days
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short n' sweet- prologue
after winning the U20 vs Bluelock match 28th January 2019, 11:48pm __________________
rin was pissed, beyond pissed, he was frustrated, angry but mainly disappointed. he failed to get sae to recognize him. again. he was shaken out of his thought when you ran up to him hugging him.
"rin!! you won. bro said nah he'd win and actually won!" you arms were wrapped around him what was this sudden feeling in his chest? it felt...comforting? your giggles were ringing through his ears and your perfume was so sweet. why was this hug different? he's hugged so many times, why was this time any different?
"rin? rinrin? with this treasure i summon the" you pulled away looking up at his face, it looked sad and angry but confused? you wondered what was going on behind those gorgeous eyes. wait what? gorgeous eyes? when did you start feeling that way about him?
your voice snapped him out of his thoughts, "yeah, we won" he sounded uninterested and bored.
"oh come on! cheer up a little you just won one of the most important matches of your career so far, you could be a little happy you know.." you tried you best to comfort him but you doubted it would work
"happy for what? that isagi was the one chosen by sae? that isagi is the hope of japanese football? is that was you want me to be happy about?" shit. he didn't mean to snap, he really didn't but it just came out he wanted to apologize but before he could you cut him off.
"okay why the fuck are you taking out your anger on me? i came all the way from madrid just for you and that's how you wanna talk to me? fuck off" fuck he messed up didn't he?
while walking away you bumped into this guy with a weird haircut who you recognized was bachira, rin had mentioned him before, he was the guy who had a monster right?
"oh sorry i didn't mean oh wait you're uhh bachira right? amazing plays man! you were so cool out there!" you complimented the taller male which made him blush, he was cute that was no doubt.
"yeahh thank youu WAIT YOU'RE Y/N RIGHT? LIKE THE STREAMER Y/N? HOLY FUCKING SHIT IM A HUGE FAN!"
"y-yeah, please quite down a little i'm y/n i don't wanna attract any unwanted attention"
"oh oops sorry i got a bit silly, can i have your number?" he was smiling like a small kid it was hard to not melt, but you only met this guy, but he looked harmless what's the worst that could happen?
"yeah sure it's xxx-xxx-xxx"
"cool thank you! you're rin's friend right?"
"yeah, good friends i've known him since i was in diapers so i guess so, wait how'd you know?"
"i saw you talking to him, is everything alright by the way? you look a bit off"
"just a small argument with rin it's nothing"
"he's a silly little fella he'll come around he's just on his periods probably"
that made you giggle, "yeah probably" bachira was really nice a bit odd but he was a really sweet guy, you were questioning why rin called him weird but rin thinks everyone is weird right?
"anyways i'll text you i need to go catch up with my team it was really nice meeting you though!"
"you too bachira, i'll see you around"
walking away you got a notification on your phone you have been added to "lvl 100 rizzlers"
oh what the fuck?
lvl 100 rizzlers
xxx-xxxx-xxx recognize this number mr edgelord
rinrin oh you fucker
xxx-xxxx-xxx who the fuck is that baxhira?
xxx-xxxx-xxx is it a female? FCUKIGN FINALLY
xxx-xxxx-xxx challenge: otoya try to stop being horny (NIT CLOCKBAUT GONE WRONG😱😱)
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"oh so are they in love or they not in love?"  -bachira
will rin accept his feelings for you? or will he keep denying it? will you realise that maybe your feelings aren't one sided? only time, situations and his " friends" will tell.
the text from now on will be image wise and not actually typed out (?) if that makes sense
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theholypeanut · 11 months
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♪ You Belong with Me ♪
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Characters: Bachira Meguru, Isagi Yoichi, Kunigami Rensuke
Cw: stalking, fake dating or is it?, fluff and a tiny lil angst, mention of Barou not getting bitches (pov he goes to the same school as Isagi) , mention of Otoya being a horny perv (Otoya slander as always love u Eita)
Plot: Being a football star is not an easy task, being popular can really get on your nerves when someone goes too far. That’s why he asks you to pretend to be his girlfriend to make all of this unwanted attention to go away highschool au, fake dating trope, afab!reader, ~800 words each
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Bachira Meguru
Bachira was never very popular with girls, so when he started getting anonymous love letters, he was excited. Someone is crushing on him? However, as time passed, it seemed like this person was more obsessed than in love - writing about how cute Megu looks under the shower (how do they know?) and thirsty messages about how amazing he smells - it got very uncomfortable, especially when you don’t know who is sending you all of this. So he asked you if you could pretend to be his partner, just so the stalker would leave him alone. 
Fake dating Bachira was actually a lot of fun. Since you were close friends, so you essentially did the same things, except his hand was wandering on your back a lot, around your waist, in your hair. He started to call you Bumblebee in front of others, making you blush with his affectionate behaviour. To be clear, he was clingy before, but now Bachira Meguru was just a menace. However, it didn’t take you long to get used to wearing his sweatshirt when it was cold, and holding hands around his teammates “because you’ll never know if the stalker is seeing or not, so we have to be like this all the time”. But as time went on Bachira started to be more bold. At first, he kissed your hand occasionally while you walked home, and eventually, he moved on to kissing your forehead goodbye. He didn’t care if it was around people or not anymore. You couldn’t control the butterflies in your stomach every time you felt his lips on your skin. 
Obviously the creepy stalker sent some nasty stuff to Bachira about being heartbroken, however after two weeks you got a familiar envelope in your shoe shelf. Scared that it might be some threat, you opened the letter with shaky hands.
“Take care of him well. I can see how much he loves you”
It caught you off guard, but without a second to think about it, you felt familiar hands around your waist. “Good morning baby” Bachira’s face was right next to your ear as he planted little kiss on your cheek. And just as you looked at him you thought: god, I really don’t want this to end.
He saw the envelope in your hands and got angry at the spot. “I really hope they don’t even try to mess with my-” you shook your head and showed him the letter. “It’s good. You are good” You stopped for a second with a sad look on your face. “I guess if it worked we don’t have to-” the bell starting classes stopped you from ending the sentence. But Bachira knew what you wanted to say and he hated it.
You spent morning classes thinking about Meguru way more than usual. The silence on his part was frightening you, because what if for him it was really just an act? What if he doesn’t mind to come back to things as they were?
On the lunch break you felt your phone vibrating.
Megu: Can we talk? Come behind the gym
Without answering you just stood up and went feeling anxiety taking over your body. When you arrived and saw a familiar silhouette, your heart skipped a bit. Meguru came closer and pushed you gently against the wall and put his forehead on the crook of your neck. Feeling his breathe so close to your skin make you shiver.
“You are right, you don’t have to pretend anymore” he said, and your throat got dry as you felt like tearing up any moment.
“But if we stop pretending, and do it for real, does that mean I can kiss your lips too?”
Isagi Yoichi
Isagi was your best friend since childhood, the best neighbour, an amazing companion to play board games with. And of course, you were always the loudest fan cheering on all of his matches.
Isagi got very popular when he became one of the best players in his high school and girls and boys finally saw the side of him you saw all along: a very athletic, nice and cute boy. And a very, very handsome one.
At first it flattered him that so many girls came to see him play; however, the louder they screamed, and they squeaked every time he looked in their direction, the more annoying it was to him and distracted him from the game. “Isagi, control your fun club” he heard from angry Barou.
But to be fair, he had no idea what he could do with this issue. He was simply too kind to snap at them, and too shy to stand up to them either.
“Maybe they’ll stop if you date someone?” Bachira mentioned in the locker room after practice. Then he whispered right to Yoichi’s ear: “You have someone who you want to date for some time already, right, Isagi?”
Isagi blushed. Of course there is only one person he would even consider to date: you. But how could he ask you to date him because of something so stupid? He couldn’t do that for years now, so how will he grow a pair now?
“Maybe just get a fake girlfriend” he heard Aiku speaking. “If you are such a virgin you can’t actually get one.”
So obviously, when he asked you, if you could pretend to be his partner to get rid of unwanted attention, how could you say no?
And that’s how you two ended in this situation: holding hands with your childhood friend while going back home together. His hands were so warm, and big, and for the entire route you felt hyper aware of his presence.
“So… how was the practice?” You asked to fill the silence. Normally you’d talk for hours and joke all the way home, but apparently Isagi is also not used to holding hands.
“It was very good… I think the fan club might get more and more discouraged” Yoichi barely could make a full sentence, that’s how much he focused on the way your hand felt. If he knew he could hold your hand everyday, he would ask you to pretend to be his girlfriend years ago.
Pretend. Yeah.
However is it still pretending if you are doing that on your way home with no one around?
“So… what are your plans for the weekend?” He asked trying to get himself together. His team didn’t have to play any matches this week, which was a rare occurrence. And gave him some time for himself.
“Well, I don’t have any particular plans” you started holding his hand tighter. He blushed. “I was thinking maybe I’d study some, watch a movie… on my own”
Oh?
“Do you maybe…” he started while looking away, so you won’t notice his embarrassment. “Want to watch it together? Or… or study together?”
You looked on the ground. Isagi started to regret his boldness - what if you don’t actually like him this way? What if you are actually embarrassed to hold hands with him and it makes you uncomfortable, and you only let it happen because you are a good friend? With growing silence he started overthinking everything and started taking his hand back, just to not make you feel more uncomfortable.
But you held it tighter and raised your brow.
“And what do you think you are doing, huh?”
“I’m sorry, that was very stupid” he started. “I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable, you are already spending so much time with me because of this whole situation, just tell me and I’ll stop bothering you so much”
For a football star he was really insecure, but what could he say? He crumbled under the idea that you might be annoyed with his touch or by his presence. Even if he’d have to keep his feelings for you forever, he’ll do it if that mean he gets to keep you as his friend.
“Yoichi” you started quietly. “You don’t make me uncomfortable. You could never bother me, you know? I actually…” you felt the feelings stuck in your throat. “Missed you a lot, since you are so busy with your football career. I missed spending time with you. Just us”
Isagi felt adrenaline was rushing through his veins just like before he was about to shoot a goal. This was an occasion he was waiting for so long.
“Do you maybe want to go on a date together?” He said without hesitation. You blinked a little surprised.
“You mean like, a fake date?”
“No. A real date. Just us. We can go to cinema, or maybe for a picnic, or we can just study together too…” he held your hand so tightly his fingers turned white. You smiled.
“Yeah, I’d love that”
Kunigami Rensuke
Saying that you and Kunigami were very good friends would be an overstatement. You were a manager of his football team for a year now, and you had a massive crush on him, but you never really talked regularly.
Kunigami was always a very polite guy, thanking you for every towel, every water bottle, always helping you with tasks that require strength, but he wasn’t very talkative, so you just assumed he was doing it out of simple generosity - he was a truly decent person. No wonder so many girls were swooning whenever he was on the field, it was always like this. His physique, handsome face, manners - you sometimes felt jealous over girls who could just openly state their feelings for Kunigami, because in your position it would be inappropriate. So you kept it nice and hidden.
Until you regretted it deeply.
There was this one particular fangirl who was on every match, cheering the loudest, always bringing Kunigami food “with lots of protein just as you like”, made herself a shirt that looks just like his football jersey. She was indeed very annoying and most of the team would either find her unbearable, or, as Otoya, were always staring at her ass in this very short skirt she was wearing.
And then you heard one day as you just arrived to school, that Kunigami has a girlfriend. It was like time stopped for a second. Till now you never expected your crush to date someone else, so in split seconds your heart was aching. Was this that girl? Did she finally succeed in her obnoxious tries?
The whole day at school felt like a fever dream. “Would’ve, should’ve, could’ve” was all over your brain. Maybe you should’ve confessed? Be more aggressive in your tries for his heart? Could you even have any chances?
You took your lunch out and tried to find a quiet place to eat, so you can spiral into your teenage depression a little more. But while going around school you passed the girl’s bathroom, just to hear The Short Skirt crying to her friends. You stopped right behind the door.
“He said that he has a girlfriend… and that I should stop coming on the matches… because it’s not okay towards her…” she took breaks to sniffle.
“You shouldn’t cry about it, we know you are way better than this half-ass girlfriend! There’s no way he got someone better than you!” - her friends were seriously doing their best.
Your brain was working fast. So it wasn’t her? You never saw Kunigami talking to any girl outside of you and her. Does he have a girlfriend outside of the school? Actually, Kunigami gives this vibe “neighbours to lovers” or “childhood friends to lovers”, so it wouldn’t be that far off.
You went to think about it in silence to one of the quieter wings of the school, and was just about to eat your sashimi, when someone aggressively entered the room.
“Oh, good. I found you.” you could see Kunigami was running just seconds ago. He was breathing just as he just ended a marathon. Was he that desperate to tell you that your presence bothers his girlfriend too? “Can I sit with you?”
“Sure” you only let out. He took a place meter away from you and didn’t say anything for a while. It started to get a little awkward, so you brought your bento closer to him.
“Do you have any lunch? Want some sashimi?” you went into your manager mode. If your players don’t eat well, how can they play well? Kunigami considered your offer for a split second.
“No, thank you” As always, you thought, Man of few words.
“So…” he started, while looking at the wall. “I don’t know if you heard the rumours yet”
You tried your best to keep your composure. “Yeah. You have a girlfriend? Congratulations” probably the lack of enthusiasm sold you away. At worst you can always pretend that you are just worried that he will play worse if he’d date, right? Because he is a valuable player.
“Yeah this one. So I kinda wanted to talk to you first, before you hear it, but…” he rubbed the back of his neck with embarrassment. “Yeah I should have told you yesterday. Sorry”
Oh? You frowned your brows. It’s not like you are such good friends that you would be the first person he’d say that he dates someone? Again you barely talk outside of practice. “Yeah I don’t think you owe me anything. Again good for you, Kunigami-kun”
“No, I don’t think you understand what I mean” he said quickly, like he was afraid you’d leave. “I don’t have a girlfriend.” You felt a little lost now.
“Actually…” he started, still not looking directly at you. “When I told this cheerleader girl that I have a girlfriend, I did it just so she would stop acting like this. It’s not true”
Oooooh. You blinked. Well, now the day started to get a little brighter. “And you wanted to tell me that… why?”
If you sit closer, you’d see how Kunigami’s ears were bright red. “So Bachira said, that maybe I should ask you to pretend to be my girlfriend for a while, so we would be sure that it looks realistic” he paused and finally looked at you. You never saw him looking so vulnerable. “Of course you don’t have to do anything. I was thinking that maybe I would walk you home, and we would eat lunch together, and we should exchange phone numbers…” With every word he looked more and more red. Could he be any more adorable than in this moment?
You smiled, and then dramatically sighed.
“I don’t know, Kunigami-kun. That is a lot of heat I am taking on myself - you have quite an aggressive funclub” you could feel how he freezes in fear, afraid of where are you going with this. Just like a scared puppy. “I think lunch and walking home are not enough. You owe me at least one date per week, where we go to the cinema, or to the arcade…” you thought for a while. “Honestly if you will not after every goal look at me and obnoxiously scream THIS ONE IS FOR YOU BABY, I don’t know if this is worth it. If I’m gonna get murdered by this witches, at least I wanna know you embarrassed yourself enough to compete with Shidou’s cringe. ”
You could feel how all of the stress just disappeared from his shoulders. He really had all of his little speech prepared.
“Okay” he said smiling. “But I’m not saying anything sexual, some things Shidou screams during the matches are seriously nightmare’s material.”
“Ah shoot, no INTO THE WOMB?” You decided to tease him some more, as he is technically now your boyfriend.
“Please stop”
“Then we go to the arcade twice per week”
“If you skip the embarrassing screaming, I can even win you plushies on every outing”
And just like that, you kinda wished The Short Skirt will never be fully convinced about you two, so you can spend time like this for long enough, so it will just become real.
And so did Kunigami.
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By slowlyholypeanut please give credit don’t translate and don’t steal love u
Bachira is the best wingman for both Isagi and Kunigami 🫶 (and for himself) what an icon
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t-r99 · 5 months
Text
Dreamlike
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Karasu Tabito x reader
Caw Caw Bitch has a voice fetish:)
warning: suggestive (tiny bit of smut at the end)
wc: 570
You have the voice of an angel.
Karasu loves your voice more than anything in existence, so much so that the first time he heard you speak his heart skipped a beat, or a few, and he started blushing.
He may or may not have smacked a hand against Otoya's mouth to keep him from mentioning it. Karasu could feel his face heat up, he did not need stupid ninja making fun of him for it on top of everything.
The best thing about your voice is when you sit in his lap and your lips are right by his ear, just as you're doing right now.
Your hands are on his stomach, feeling his muscles through his thin t shirt and torturing him. Karasu wishes you would just lift the stupid thing up so he can feel your skin against his own.
"What's wrong, baby?" You murmur by his ear, voice low and smooth.
He's starting to regret ever letting you tie his hands behind his back and blindfold him. All he wants to do right now is get on top of you and make you scream his name.
"Why're you shaking?" You whisper, moving your hands up agonizingly slowly to his shoulders where you start to massage.
"Nnnh . . ."
Your voice is heavenly. Only he gets to hear it like this. Karasu is the only one in the world who gets to hear your smooth, dreamlike voice coo down at him soothingly and whisper by his ear.
"Tabito,"
Oh, fuck.
It's not fair that you're naked while he's still fully clothed. He wants to hear your sweet moans and he wants your voice to echo and bounce off the walls of your shared bedroom. "Please . . ." Karasu begs.
You laugh at that, deep and low, and you shift so you can switch sides and move down to the other side of his face.
Your soft lips brush against the shell of his ear and you let out a soft moan that almost has him crumbling.
Honestly, you're just being mean at this point with how you're grinding gently against him and panting a bit now. "Please what?" You smile and bite your bottom lip with a moan. "This?"
"Baby, please . . ." He pleads again, and his breath hitches when you reach your hands down to undo the button on his jeans. "F- Fuck-"
"I thought I was supposed to be the loud one here." You laugh quietly.
Karasu is sure he's dying now. He is dying and your sweet voice is guiding him to the afterlife.
He's finally getting what he wanted, and shit, his brain is melting from it all.
Your movements are slow and, oh, so good, gliding up and down on his throbbing cock while whining with need into his ear with your arms now around his neck.
Karasu is fine with his hands still being tied and his eyes being blindfolded because he gets to be deep inside you and hear those soft moans in your dreamlike voice that only exists for him.
"T- Tabito, you're so deep . . ."
"'m g'na cum, fuck." Karasu is losing it. "Let me hear, let me hear." He begs.
He doesn't last long. How could he with you whining and begging for his cum in your angel like voice like that?
God, he loves your voice.
There really is nothing sweeter than hearing you cry his name as he fills you up.
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milaisreading · 1 year
Note
If are requests are open then... 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️
Blue Lock men having an 'unbiased' ranking on which player will be the best to worst bf (based on their opinion which makes it worse lol) for dear y/n :p <33
🌱🩷: Thanks for the request! Hope u like this one
Warnings: Reader uses she/her. In the story the boys will be using he/him when addressing Yn. Requests for this series are open.
⚽️Blue Lock belongs to Muneyuki Kaneshiro and Yusuke Nomura⚽️
Masterlist to this series
"You?! Don't make me laught, Otoya!" The Blue Lock members looked away from their food or their conversations, and looked at the table Yukimiya, Karasu and Otoya were occupying. On further inspection, they noted the nasty glares Yukimiya and Karasu were sending a smug-looking Otoya.
"This isn't a comedy, Karasu. I am the best fit boyfriend for our dear striker. And (Y/n) would definitely vouch for me."
At the mention of the word boyfriend, attached to (Y/n)'s name, the room fell silent for a moment. Nobody spoke as they looked in disbelief at Otoya, but it quickly got broken by Reo.
"You?! What makes you think (Y/n) would go out with someone like you?! He has standards!" The purple-haired heir yelled in anger as Nagi stared at them in resentment.
"Easy, I am funny, charismatic, can be caring, and (Y/n)'s humor mashes well with mine. We are a match made in heaven-"
"Shut up, Otoya! You two are not! If anything, I am the perfect boyfriend for (Y/n). We are both handsome, could pass as models, and we both share a love for sweets. I even take him out to get mochi when we have a day off-"
"What?! Yukimiya, since when are you so close to the Lukewarm?" It was now Rin's turn to yell as everyone else glare at the model.
"Ever since the 3rd selected. If you weren't such a stuck up narcissist, Rin, you would know how it is like being so close to him." Yukimiya snickered, earning a glare from the captain.
"Well, I believe I am the best one for him. (Y/n) and were in the same team during the 3rd selection and we both worked pretty well together. My more extroverted persona goes well with his calmer, introverted one. I think I am the better match-"
"Hold it, Karasu. You are not fit standing next to (Y/n), let alone be his boyfriend." Hiori interrupted the crow-boy, who sent him a side-glare.
"What did you say?"
"All I am saying is that (Y/n) needs someone who will treat him kindly and gently, which isn't something you would do. But, me? I am a different story-"
"So am I then, Hiori. Besides, (Y/n) and I have known each other ever since the 1st selection started. We even trained together." Hiori turned to glare at Isagi, who was sitting next to a gloomy Bachira.
"And also, we talk about a lot of things. He is very comfortable around me." Isagi smiled at the last part, which irked Barou.
"Hold it, if we are going by that, then I am the perfect boyfriend for (Y/n). After all, we have been partners since the beginning. I know everything there is to know about him. And besides, he likes my cooking more."
"What?! When did he try your food, King?" Chigiri asked, irritated with the satisfied look on Barou's face.
"The last time we had a week off, I invited him for a dinner with my family."
"Cheater! Wait, so you are the reason he couldn't play video games with me?!" Nagi got up from his seat, the sight of the enraged albino was the last thing anyone expected to ever witness.
"Nagi, that is not the point. The point is, I would make a better boyfriend. I am funny, respectful and pretty, anything someone like (Y/n) could want." Chigiri smiled smuggly.
"Hold it there, Chigiri. I might not be the most emotionally open one, but I could treat (Y/n) way better. I am strong and reliable, after all." Kunigami started, earning an eyeroll from Bachira.
"Strength isn't everything." The bicolored boy started.
"After all, I am funny, considered, and affectionate! Perfect for someone like (Y/n)-"
"Bachira, you have no sense of personal space." Kurona spoke up in a monotone voice as he sat next to Niko.
"Excuse me. Did you say something, Kurona?" Bachira asked with a slight edge to his tone.
"I said you don't know personal space. I might not be the most talkative, but (Y/n) is definitely the most comfortable with me. We always eat lunch together and spend times watching YouTube when one of us has a phone." Kurona sighed dreamily, attracting Gagamaru's attention.
"Well... I think he would be a good match with me too. He doesn't mind that I eat with my hands, and we both live eating. He even said we can go to a taste test in Kanagawa." The goalkeeper blushed a little.
"Tsk. Tsk. None of you are stylish enough for someone as elegant and caring as (Y/n). Now, I on the other hand am a perfect match."
"What was that?" Reo warned Aryu, who just flipped his hair and smirked at him.
"I am just saying that (Y/n) and I both enjoy skin care and hair care a lot. He is also very adaptable to any of my conversations."
"(Y-Y/n).... uh...he is very kind and caring..." Tokimitsu started nervously as everyone turned to look at him.
"He always helps me calm down, and even gave me advices during the 2nd and 3rd selection... I think we might be cute, too." Tokimitsu laughed nervously as he played with his hands.
"Quiet! All of you don't deserve that mediocre striker." The team turned to look at an enraged Rin.
"Did you just call (Y/n) mediocre?!"
"Also, who deserves him then, Rinnie?" Isagi and Otoya exclaimed.
"Me, of course. I am the best player around, and someone (Y/n) can always relax with. I am calm and collected, perfect for him."
"That's stupid. If anything, Reo and I are the perfect match for (Y/n). We have known him for waay longer." Nagi said, earning a few glares.
"Aren't you two the ones who ostracized him? We might not agree on who is the best pick for (Y/n), but we all know you two are the last ones on the list." Niko commented, causing the two boys to speak up again.
"We made up!"
"Besides, I think my intelligence is what (Y/n) would want above any of the qualities any of you have." Niko finished.
"Why you-"
Yukimiya git interrupted as Ego's voice boomed through the room.
"Why are you guys still here? Go back to training. (Y/n) and Shidou are waiting for you to form teams."
There was a short silence as everyone registered the last sentence.
"Shidou? (Y/n) and Shidou are together?" Gagamaru asked carefully as the room's temperature dropped.
"Yeah, an hour ago Shidou pulled him away from the cafeteria so that they could practice-"
Before Ego could finish, Rin, Barou, Isagi, and Kunigami already rushed out of the room. The rest followed soon after.
"Shidou, can you get off of me?" (Y/n) groaned as the boy leaned his whole weight on her.
'So heavy...' She thought to herself, jumping as the blonde-pink haired boy moved his face closer to her ear.
"I like it like this more. You are very warm~" Shidou smirked, tightening his Hold around her waist.
"H-hey!" She blushed a bright red from all the attention, and Shidou laughed a little. But before he could speak, the door to the training room got opened.
"Shidou, you piece of shit! Get off of (Y/n)!" Rin yelled, seeing red from how close they were.
"Red card! Red card!" Bachira's yell came next.
(Y/n) sighed in defeat as she heard Shidou chuckle again and pull her closer to him.
"Calm down,  (Y/n) and I are just bonding~"
'Kill me.'
416 notes · View notes
ph4ngz · 1 year
Note
Hello lovely!! I love your concept of „how the bllk men fuck“
Any thoughts on how Niko, Ness and Otoya would fuck ?
*happy noises* tysm!!
Ikki Niko fucks you with a dirty trick up his sleeve. He'll start off all "y-yeah, feels amazing~", with passionate thrusts and lovely long kisses, keeping your legs up or offering to do all the work if you get tired. Then, around 5-6 minutes in? The guy's revelling in your cute little face of surprise. He's holding you in a position that you had no idea existed, let alone been in before. And when it feels good, it feels good. "Hnnngh, can you keep this position? Yeah? Too much? Too bad, huh..." he'll be panting, clawing at your body whilst you cry out his name as he's forcing your form to take him in his favoured position.
Niko likes to make a scene when it's time for you both to cum, because it's like screaming to the world: 'I did that! I made her cum with my hidden technique!'. He'll groan louder than necessary and keeps thrusting into your sore, cum-coated pussy, nice and smoothly while you're reaching out to his chest in a futile attempt to slow him down. "Oh— Ohhhhh... ssshhhhhit!"
Alexis Ness fucks you with complete trust. He's borderline addicted to your body, he knows it never lies. You'll be trying to hide the way your face contorts with ecstasy, hearing him breathe out an amused giggle even when he's balls fucking deep, "N'awh, dont be silly. You think you can hide how great you feel?". His fingers are so cruel to you, pinching and pulling at your nipples or slapping your ass to feel you clench just because he wants to be the one to bring out your true reactions. Just because he wants to let you know that 'I'm yours, I'll always be yours and you'll never find anyone that can keep you more truthful than me!'.
"I knowww," he'll pout to imitate you, "trust me, I know baby." You'll sometimes have the heart to argue back to him as he's above you, smiling and moaning breathily, claiming that he's way too confident. "I don't buy it, princess... n-nngh! All I have to do is ask your body, s-see?" Ness will grin, bright eyed and alert of your body language before lightly sliding his hand back and forth over your clit so you literally squirt on his command. He'll be able to see from a mile away that you're about to cum, so just let go won't you?
Eita Otoya fucks you with...
Oops... hasn't he told you yet? He fucks you with unreliability. Otoya will keep you on your toes, downright wary of him during sex. You'll never know when he's about to switch positions, change pace or— "F-Fuck, sorry babe..." bottom out... He'll never warn you, part of you thinks he forgets? But part of you thinks he does it on purpose due to those laidback, shitty excuses for apologies that make you think he's a scumbag. "You're so tight, you're so good~" he'll repeat from behind you, slamming into your sopping wet cunt one second and softly thrusting whilst caressing your hips the next. Unpredictable isn't even the word... He just seems to refuse letting you become accustomed to his cock, as if he's making sure you don't get too attached to him. Now if you actually knew the real reason why he'd be doing that... nah, you'd probably still beg for his cock even if he did think a relationship with you would be tiresome. He's too good.
Otoya doesn't even tell you when he's about to cum... thank god for birth control. You'll be screaming his name into your pillow as the headboard is making the wall crack, then suddenly: "tch! Ah~ yeahhh..." as his dick fills you with his loving, he calls it.
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1K notes · View notes
kvrokasaa · 8 months
Text
Please, Don't Leave Me
Karasu x reader
cw: Gn!pronouns but afab!reader, reader has female genitalia, implied cunnilingus, and sex, suggestive themes at the end, angst-ish, fluff, kinda forced plot ngl, Karasu's accent might be off, not proofread, Otoya being respectful to a woman 😨, Isagi and Bachira are mentioned once.
2.5k words
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Today felt off. Well, more specifically, the past week has felt off. You don’t know if you’re the only one feeling this way. But it’s like the shift in your relationship has turned.
Every time you try and get attention from your boyfriend, he waves you off. Literally. He waves his hand, acting as if you’re a fly pestering him.
You don’t know what started this behavior. Just two weeks ago you both were fine. Visiting your family and having a nice time. You know it wasn’t anything your family said, they don’t pry into your relationships. But you can’t seem to figure it out for the life of you.
Just last night when you came over to his place, you tried to ask if he wanted to watch a movie with you. It was movie night, every week you both dedicate a night to watching movies, whatever happens, happens. But Karasu simply shrugged and said, “ ’s late and I have early practice tomorrow.”
Karasu never shrugs off movie night.
As to get some clarification for why this is happening, you decide to show up at his practice. And it wasn’t early morning, which made you even more confused.
So much questions and so little answers.
As you make your way to the field, they stopped playing for minute to catch their breaths and drink some water, you pass by a few of his teammates. They all give you confused glances.
You’ve never once showed up to his practices. Only to his games. It’s not because you didn’t want to, he just never asked and you didn’t want to intrude.
You carry a little bag in your hand. He forgot his lunch and, being a good s/o, you decided to bring it with you.
“Hey baby,” the words come out as you rest your head on his back. “You forgot your lunch, here.”
You hand him the bag. It’s already past noon, but you’re guessing he didn’t have anything to eat unless his friends offered some of their food.
He only grunted in response and took the bag from your hand, rather forcefully too. “Thanks.” His response was curt.
He made his way to the benches and set the bag down.
“Why have you been ignoring me,” you’re not sure ignoring was the right word, but it was among the similarities of the traits he’s been showing you this past week. “I’m not ignoring ya.” His voice was laced with malice. You don’t know why, but your body reacted before your brain as it flinched a little.
His words, even the mean ones, never seemed to startle you. But after the agonizing thoughts every night, which caused less and less sleep, you couldn’t think straight. Which resulted in your body moving before you could think to stop it.
If he was concerned or remorseful about his attitude, he didn’t show it. His face was hardened and still, as if it was sculpted.
“It doesn’t feel like that. You’ve been putting me off all week. Not even a good morning text. What’s…” Your voice died off as you saw him turn around and glare at you. He’s acting like you broke one of his million dollar vases, which he does own unironically.
“Is that what ya want? A ‘good morning’ text, a ‘how was your day?’ text? I’m working my ass off all day to provide for me and you and yer complaining that I don’t show enough love? Just be grateful for once in our fucking relationship.”
You wanted to bite back, to tell him that you work too. Sure your job doesn’t pay as well as his does, but he also has the inheritance from his family to back him up. You don’t. You get up every morning and work, you don’t complain either. Sure, what you’re doing now can be classified as complaining, but you rarely ever open your mouth to complain. And you are grateful, you don’t know how many times you’ve been grateful in your relationship with him. It’s not a chore for you, but he’s acting like you’ve never said, ‘thank you,’ to him once.
But you bite your tongue when he opens his mouth again. “I don’t think ya understand, Y/n. I play soccer for me; this is the only chance I get to be away from you. But now you show up and have to ruin everything. Get it through yer thick skull, I don’t want you around unless it’s necessary.”
Your eyes widen at his last sentence. Did he think you were a chore to be around? Did he only want you around when he felt it was convenient? Did he ever think of you as his s/o?
You aren’t one to cry in public places, sometimes you even hold back your tears in your own bedroom. You don’t like the feeling of tears sliding down your cheeks. You hate the feeling of pain and failure. You’ve never even cried in front of your own boyfriend and you have been together for six months now.
But you can’t stop the tear from falling down your cheek and onto the grassy field. You manage to stop the next one, and the one after that. You sniffle and nod your head. You have nothing left to say to him, if he wants space, then you’ll give him space. This is just him setting his boundaries, right?
Right.
“Okay.” You don’t know how, but you manage to hold your head up and keep your tears at bay, along with your voice neutral. “If you really feel that way, then I’ll leave.”
There were many implications behind your words. You could mean the relationship or just the field where you stand in now. You honestly don’t know which one of them you meant. But you let your legs take you away from his one happy place.
He chose his career over you, and you’re fine with that. But you being fine with that doesn’t mean you will settle into this little routine.
You’ll dip your feet into the water, see how much of an impact his words leave in your relationship. If you don’t like the ripples in the water, then you’ll just leave.
He hears scoffs and snorts from his team as he snaps back to reality. “What the fuck dude? All they did was ask you a simple question.” Isagi chimes in. “Yeah man. You did not need to blow up that like.”
Otoya looks over at Isagi and nods his head, “I’m going with Isagi on this one.”
Karasu scoffs. “Shut it, fuckboy. You-” “Don’t tell me what to do moron. You made them fucking cry.”
He made you cry? You’ve never cried before, at least not in front of him. Was he so lost in thought that he didn’t even see your tears? Did his words hurt you that much?
“You gotta fix this before it’s too late~.” Bachira voiced Karasu's thoughts.
...
Your house seems bare and lonely without the smile on your face, or the warm touches from him. Your plants seem to reflect your emotions, droopy and sad.
You make your way to your bedroom, ready to sulk in bed for the rest of the day. Thanks to it being a weekend, you have the day off. Which means you could sulk for as long as you want.
You pull the weighted blanket onto your body and sigh contentedly at the comfort. This is the only comfort you need right now, a stupid rom-com, some junk food, and a good amount of weight.
Your phone goes off before you can delve into the movie too much. You sigh, already knowing who it’s from. You picked it up and just as you guessed, Karasu.
He had a written a whole paragraph about how sorry he is and that he would be glad to make it up to you. You opted to just text him back with:
It’s alright. I know you didn’t mean it haha, it’s late so I’ll talk in the morning. Goodnight!
You already know that he’s going to think something’s up. Let him, he deserves the cold shoulder, an insidious voice sang in the back of your mind. As much as you want to brush the voice away, you know that it’s true. He does deserve the cold shoulder. You’ve been nothing but good to him and he treats you like this?
You let your thoughts run wild and finally determine that you'll respect his words for a bit. If he wants you to leave him alone, you'll leave him alone. You won't go to his practices and games or make him his lunches anymore.
A few hours passed by as you dwelled in your bed. You should probably text some of your friends and ask for a night out. But honestly, you just wanted to stay in and eat all the junk you can.
You've watched at least three rom-com movies; some made you laugh and some made you cry. You want to say that you mainly cringed, but what you mainly did was wish Karasu could act like some of the male leads.
Yeah, he remembers your favorite food and gets you as many things as you want. But you wish he would put away his pride and apologize.
Before you knew it, your eyes drifted off while your mind rambled about Karasu.
...
The smell of pancakes and eggs woke you from your slumber. You yawned and stretched your muscles as you made your way out of bed. You weren't too shocked to see Karasu in your kitchen with the 'kiss the cook' apron you gifted him as a joke on his birthday.
When you two had an argument, he would always cook you food, buy you things, and spend the entire day with you. But those things are meaningless after the argument you had the other day.
But you still let him try.
He smiles when he sees your sleepy face. But his smile turned into a pout when he saw your runny mascara and puffy/red eyes. He did that. He made you cry. Karasu walks up to you and brings you into his arms.
"I'm sorry pretty baby," he kissed your forehead. "I don't deserve you."
You snort at that; there's something you both can agree on. He smiles when he hears your snort. Step one: make you laugh: check.
You both sit at the table and eat the delicious food he made. Contrary to popular opinion, Karasu is actually a good cook. The food was gone in minutes.
"I have a game tomorrow," he says as he chews the last bite on his plate. "I can reserve a front-row seat for you, like always."
You give him a kind smile; you want to say no but his puppy eyes are too tempting. "Okay." Your response was curt, you didn't mean anything by it. But Karasu took it as you giving the same attitude he gave you yesterday. He pouted and grabbed your hand, smoothing his thumb over your knuckles. "I wanna hear ya cheering f'me, okay?" You nodded your head and he smiled at that, bringing your hand up and kissing it. "That's my pretty baby."
You two spent the whole day talking and shopping. You got the things you needed and wanted, and even more things that Karasu thought would look good on you.
The gifts made you smile, but they held most of the weight behind your fake smile. You didn't want to speak out that you didn't need these meaningless things, you just wanted him to hug you and tell you that he loves you. You know that you just have to speak up about these things, but you don't want to start another argument.
Your tongue was bit through the entire day and night with him.
...
You woke up a bit later than intended, but the sleep was welcomed and needed. You felt like the pain and memories of the past few days have been erased.
You felt like you were forgetting something. You yawned and turned on your phone, then it hit you.
Karasu's soccer game. It's 1:30 in the afternoon, you're sure the game is already halfway through. And it's a thirty-minute drive to the stadium. Which means when you get there, it'll be almost over. So, there's no point in going. So you opted to just grab something to eat and turn on Netflix. Yeah, you feel bad, but honestly, Karasu deserves this. Maybe he'll remember not to catch an attitude with you for no reason.
Karasu on the other hand, is distraught. He doesn't remember how many times he's looked over at the stands.
He thought that you were over the other day. He apologized and made it up to you. He took you shopping and to your favorite restaurant.
His mind was elsewhere and he couldn't get into the flow of the game. His kicks weren't on point and his precision was flawed. The coach called him in and swapped for another player.
"Get your shit together or leave."
Karasu took the latter; he needs to see you.
The drive was long originally, but his thoughts made it longer. Every second he wasn't with you, he felt that it was another second you could up and leave his life.
He finally got there and quickly unlocked your door with the spare key. No boxes, nothing packed, nothing is gone. Air came back into his lungs, and he could finally breathe again.
He rushed to your room, his pout getting deeper as he saw you on your bed watching Netflix.
Your eyes widened as he rushed into your room. You swear this man will give you cardiac arrest one of these days. "What..What are you doing here?" Your eyes followed him as he stalked to your side of the bed where you were lying. "Your game, it hasn't even ended yet." He grabbed your hands before he answered, bringing them up to his cheeks.
"Baby, I'm sorry for being a dickhead, but doncha think it's rude to not come when I asked ya to?" He almost whined out. You pouted as you rubbed his cheeks with your thumbs, "I'm sorry," you cooed out. "My handsome boy, I didn't mean to."
He shook his head, "No, don't apologize baby. I shouldn't have yelled at ya. Forgive me, yeah? Just please, don't leave me." He pouted, "I don't think I can go any longer without yer kisses and hugs." He doesn't remember when he got so romantic and cheesy. He used to laugh at people who were obsessed with their s/o and used to call them mediocre. But now here he is, so fucking obsessed with you. He feels like he can't breathe when you don't give him your love. He lives off it.
"I love ya so much, my pretty baby." He brought one of your hands to his lips, peppering kisses all of it as he looked into your eyes. "Ya don't gotta say it back, jus want ya to know."
And you did know, especially through his actions. The way he kisses you, the way he dotes on you, and the way he went down on you for hours. No amount of whines and pleads for him to stop, no amount of " 's too much," were enough to stop him. His tongue and his groans against you made you feel both pain and pleasure. Karasu loves you so much and proved that while he fucked you all night.
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a/n: His accent, his smile, him <3333 Karasu is just ahbsdjsdhsdje. I'm acting up for this man
199 notes · View notes
perrywrites · 10 months
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Part 4 of murmuring u want them inside u with karasu, otoya and yukimiya?? (the trio💪)
LOVE UR WORKS❤️💋
Hope ur well (•̀ᴗ•́)و
Byebye!
The trio comin' in piping hot WHOOP
Absentmindedly murmuring that you want him inside of you during practice part 5;
NSFW 
Includes; Sae, Rin, Karasu, Otoya, Yukimiya
Part 1 (Isagi, Hiori, Bachira) and part 2 (Chigiri, Reo) and part 3 (Kaiser, Barou) and part 4 (Nagi, Shidou, Kunigami)
The demand for Sae and Rin in the requests is CRAZYYY 👀 I see you guys, I hear y’all, I finally found the time (and inspo) to write, so here’s five of the remaining bllk crew 🤭🤭🤭 FYI Sae’s the roughest one to start with here SJGDJHSGSD the others are a bit milder/romantic
Sae: he raises an eyebrow the moment he catches your simmering gaze. You have an interesting way of causing him trouble. But nonetheless, he chooses to focus on his practice, effectively ignoring your amorous expression - he’s too good at playing aloof, but on the inside he’s less than calm; it messes with him more than you and even he himself realizes. But that aloof facade doesn’t falter even as he’s walking towards you during his break, expression as indifferent as always, though there’s a teasing note in his voice as he says, “You’re unusually brazen today, are you asking for more?” His question refers to how he had you last night, making you whimper beneath him as he pushed your head down into the mattress, fucking into you. Just referring to that would usually make you so flustered you’d immediately blush, avoiding his eyes as you half-heartedly scolded him - but right now… Instead of reacting shyly, you let out a deep romantic sigh, eyes hooded and dreamy as you murmur something about wanting him inside of you. Eyebrows shooting up, he stares at you for a moment for your bold and unabashed request, wondering for a quick moment if he misheard you. But your wanton gaze dispels that doubt instantly, and he scoffs at your shamelessness. ‘Seems like I broke your brain’ he wants to say, but the words don’t leave him, dying down in his throat as he stares at you for a moment longer, heat building up inside him as he catches the way your eyelashes flutter, and the way your pouty lips part. Oh, you’re definitely asking for more, alright. Asking for him to pin you down and shove his cock in deep, bite down on your shoulders to make you cry out as he roughly thrusts into you. He’ll keep pounding away into you, a bruising grip on your hips as he grunts in your ear, mocking you and asking you if this is what you wanted. All of your sounds, he’ll soak them in, tug on your hair to hear you yelp as he pulls you into a messy kiss - pulling apart only when he’s buried deep inside of you, hips stuttering as he releases and fills you up. His fantasy is broken when he realizes what kind of heated gaze he’s sending you - and no way in hell is going to be caught by someone with a half-decent camera looking at his girlfriend like he wants to bend her over - so he looks away and gulps down his water, wiping his mouth. “... If you want me that badly, then be a good girl and stop causing me trouble,” he says, without elucidating what he even meant by something as arbitrary as ‘good girl’ and causing him trouble - but maybe that’s the point. Because both of you know whether you’re ‘good’ or ‘bad’ he’s going to fuck you - the only difference being how much rougher he is when you’ve been bad. After that, practice doesn’t go as well for him as it should, to the point that the coach decides to dismiss him early (him, in particular), kindly patting him on the shoulder as he tells him to ‘relax’ and not ‘worry’ about the upcoming match. Classic Sae, he shoves his hand off, telling him to shut the fuck up with his assumptions, and makes his way over to the showerrooms. After that humiliating experience, don’t think you’re going to get away without some discipline.  
Rin: there is always a hint of pride blooming knowing you’re right there, watching him, supporting him, though he would never say it to you. He makes sure to not be distracted, but after every goal he still looks your way as you cheer loudly, calling his name with that kind of cheery glee that always makes his heart flutter - except this time you’re silent. It takes him a moment of sweeping his gaze over to find you for this reason, and when he finds you, his heart stops for another reason… What’s up with those eyes? Those dreamy, dazed eyes, face sat in your hands as you languidly watch him, were you even really there? Dammit, don’t just sit there like that, wanting him - but then what else were you supposed to do? It’s not like he wants you to stop… wanting him… or to go away… But still, dammit. This kind of frenzied panic only happens for a moment, though, before he sweeps his gaze away and goes back to practise like his heart isn’t thundering from your stupid audacity. Stupid, lukewarm idiot. When it’s his break and he’s walking over to you, there is a vexed crease between his eyebrows as he glares down at you - but it’s so obvious he’s anything but mad when the tips of his ears are burning up like that, his lips downturned in what can only be read as a flustered frown. “What the hell are you doing?” Stop looking like you want to be taken, dammit. You hum in response, a small, pining sound, soft like cotton and all things blissful. “I want you inside of me, Rin…” Pretty eyes widening and pupils dilating, his mouth parts open slightly in complete shock - you - you - what? What? It takes him a moment to regain himself, heart pulsing wildly right beneath his skin as he observes your dazed, adoring eyes as you look up at him, expression nothing but lovesick and yearnful, and fucking hell he loses his mind. You have no clue, do you? How much he dreams of you looking at him like that, like he’s your whole world, your entire universe, like you’re so taken in by him. It makes his heart constrict, antsy to do something - to you - because that’s the only thing that can calm this desperate need, dammit. He wants to give you the whole world, keep you trapped on his bed under his large frame as he makes love to you over and over again - until his name is the only thing you can cry out, sobbing, as he fills you up repeatedly, making you take him. He wants to see you ruined by him, all vulnerable and weak beneath him, helpless to his neverending affection. Oh, yeah, he’ll give it all to you, every piece of bliss possible. But… Not right now. Your timing is horrible. Beyond horrible. And the fact that he can’t fuck you right now pisses him off beyond anything, so as the shock leaves his expression, instead it morphs into a deep frown with an unforgettable blush. “... You better keep that energy by the time I’m done with practice, fucking freak.” Or else he’ll make you regret putting him through this dilemma right inbetween practice. Don’t play with him, dammit.
Karasu: he usually tells you to not bother trying to hide it, because he can always tell when you’re wanting him, yearning for him. But this time it seems like he has no need to tell you something like that; you’re making no attempt to hide your completely apparent and obvious neediness, glassy eyes showcasing your wanton stupor, and the way that you’re flushed… Yeah, he’s absolutely sure he knows exactly what’s going on in your mind. He pretends not to, though, as he continues on with practice - the way he can control his expressions and mannerisms down to the subtlest details is never not impressive. And he continues on with the whimsical charade as he saunters over to you, though he’s itching to tease you - nah, he’ll save it for later, when he can tease you all you he wants and then take his time having you… “Ya okay? Seems like ya have no energy, didn’t finish yer breakfast again, eh? I’ll take ya out for lunch later, how about it?” He plays oblivious, seemingly genuinely concerned, like he doesn’t know exactly what your deal is. That sentiment is immediately shattered into non-existence, and even he can’t control the way his eyes widen when you whisper that lewd sentence. Oh…? You want him inside, huh…? Need him that badly, hm? Expression falling under his control within a moment, he looks away from you for a moment as he chuckles to himself, but he can’t deny the shiver that had wrecked through him the moment your low seductive whisper had assailed his senses. “A little desperate there, aren’t ya?” You have no clue how good you sound, what you do to him when you talk in that breathy voice, do you? Oh god, it kills him. And now here he was, head full with lewd fantasies of how he was going to ruin you on his cock, make you cry out for him, turn your voice all hoarse, throat sore as you soar on the height of each prolonged orgasm he’ll put you through. You sound so good then, after all, the way your voice turns all sharp and whiny and blissful when he brings you to that euphoric high after teasing you for far too long. He loves the way your exhausted face melts into shaky satisfaction, especially when your trembling thighs jolt when he takes a few moments too long before pulling out, a soft overstimulated whimper leaving your lips. He won’t deny it, hearing that sweet sound leave your lips makes his cock twitch each time, makes him want to fuck into you again and again, if only to hear that whimper of yours over and over again. And it’s so unfortunate he can’t indulge in that desire right now - but Karasu is fully capable of being patient, very patient… Especially when he knows what kind of reward he’s going to take for himself at the end of this gruelling wait. He flicks your forehead. “... Well, since yer being so cute and eager, I won’t make ya wait too long,” he says, in a low, raspy tone, and he delights in the way you instantly react, shivering. That’s his girl.
Otoya: he has a sort of sixth sense when it comes to these kind of things, especially when it comes to you. Do you think he wouldn’t know what his cute girlfriend is thinking? He doesn’t have to look at you to know - he just does. So honestly, he’s not very surprised by your passionate gaze, eyes glassy and needy. That doesn’t mean he’s not delighting in your erotic expression, though, because oh god he’s enjoying this so much. He’s still walking over to you when he starts contemplating on bailing out on practice just for your sweet, sweet invitation. Pity, the only thing stopping him right now is your inevitable rejection, because you’re proper and controlled enough to suggest he remain in practice, he knows it. Soon, he’s next to you, sitting close to you, his thigh pressed right against yours as he keeps his eyes on you. “Yo, what’s up? You seem needy. Wanna get out of here?” He thought you’d fight him on this, insist he stay for practice, and he’ll have to sigh and accept being blue balled, drag his ass back to the field when all he really wants now is to sink deep into your plush walls. To his surprise, the look in your eyes doesn’t change, still heady and dark and wanting when you whisper what you do - and despite himself, his eyes widen for a second, his thigh twitching once. Outside of those two miniscule reactions, he doesn’t let anything else tell of his shock - and more importantly, the blood that just rushed down to his cock. Oh, you’ve effectively turned him on like a lightbulb. Because oh boy, if only you knew how badly he wants to rail you now for saying that lewd sentence. He wants to feel up your entire body, trail his hands all over and claim you, kissing you everywhere he can, drink in your mewls as his lips keep finding yours again and again. He wants to let loose on your body, take over and possess every inch, make your body sing with his touch, skin tingle with the ghost of his touch even after he’s done. And more than anything, he wants to pound into you, be inside you like you asked, his cock moving in and out of you faster and faster until he spills himself into you - yeah, he decides, you guys have been dating long enough for him to ditch the condoms (plural, because you don’t think he’ll go just once, do you?). He’ll go get you plan B afterwards, but for now, he has to spill his load inside of you, especially after you’ve said such a dirty thing to him. So that’s why, he’s getting up, grabbing your wrist and pulling you up as well. “You want me to be inside of you, hm? Okay, sure. But don’t complain when I finish inside of you.” 
Yukimiya: honestly, Yukimiya has no clue what kind of needy gaze you’re directing towards him, his entire focus is on soccer - he’s just elated and honoured to know you’re there watching him at all. This, obviously, changes when he walks over to you when it’s time for his break - immediately he can tell something is up with you… The way you’re cravingly looking at him, pupils dilated and hazy, makes him burn up to the tips of his ears, a very noticeable blush overtaking his face. He clears his throat as he comes up to you, wanting to say something about your… ardent state… but unable to, so after a moment he simply distracts himself by drinking his water, trying to ignore the eager appetite of your infatuated gaze. And within the span of a few moments, Yukimiya finds himself hunched over, violently choking. What? Did you really just say what he thinks you just did? Something like… like… that? However, as bluntly… lewd… as he found your words to be, he couldn’t help the sudden rush in his bloodstream, the way his heart pounds in his ears. The idea that you need him so intimately, that you said something like that to him, a dreamy tilt to your voice… It drives him crazy with an obsession to turn you submissive and pliant under his ministrations, to worship you and fill you up with exactly what you wished for. Languidly stretch you out with a slow passion, keenly watch your expressions thaw into pleasure and twist into need as you moan and whimper for more of him. And he’ll give you everything you’ll ask for, leisurely dragging his hips, trying to drag out this moment between the two of you for as long as possible, because gosh, he could just feel eternity at the ends of his fingertips right then and there. But alas, eternity is nothing if not humanity’s fantasy, and he’ll start speeding up as you start chanting his name. You’ll hold him close like a promise, and he’ll fall apart inside of you like a heathen turned believer, groaning your name softly as he finishes inside the warmth of your heaven. His throat still burns from all the coughing, and although you’re by his side, looking worried as you voice your concern, he can’t meet your eyes at all as he keeps turning away, unwilling and unable to make eye-contact. He can’t, not when his mind is still filled with such lewd fantasies of having you - it makes him feel like he’ll pounce if he turns and looks into your eyes as you look at him with genuine concern. So he mumbles something about going back to practice, jogging away from you, effectively escaping the situation. But the human mind is a tricky thing, and his proves to be a prison. A prison full of erotic visuals and thoughts about you. A horny jail, as you’d probably say, right? Did he use that one right…? He doesn’t know, but any attempts in distracting himself fail, and as his practice comes to an end, he comes to a clear conclusion; he needs to take you home and have you, right now. 
PHEW, I finished up five charas for this over two days… And with that, this series has officially come to an end as well! Kekeke! I hope you guys enjoyed this one as well! I certainly had a lot of fun with maaaaany of these the reactions are too funny 🤭🤭🤭
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waffledforbreakfast · 1 month
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Receiving Love Letters - [MUTI! BLLK X F!READER] (pt2)
(SEPARATE)
Staring: ness, otoya, karasu, Reo
pt1: rin, sae, shidou, niko, kaiser
[ BLLK Scenario Masterlist ]
TW: heavy ooc, bad grammar, bad spelling, bad formatting, cringe, scuff, etc.
>Ness
Ness had put a bit too much effort into his letter, spending every hour of every day working on it
Kaiser had to drag him out of his room if he wanted to go anywhere
And finally came the day that Ness finished it, now it was time to deliver it to you
But he started doubting himself, and was about to turn back around to redo it, worried that it wasn’t good enough for you
But Kaiser pushed him into you, giving Ness a semi-encouraging smile (but really he was thinking smt like “cmon Ness, just get it over with…”)
Poor Ness could not stop stuttering, with every second his face grew hotter
“I- HERE.” he bowed before shoving the letter in your face and running off
He basically melted once he was out of your line of sight
“ahhhHHHHH KAISER I DID ITT. DO YOU THINK SHE THINKS IM WEIRD?? AGHARG”
“Ness, stop freaking out, it’s literally over-”
“Kaiserrrr, what if she hate’s meeeeeeee ;n; ”
“...cHILL-”
You opened the letter, interested by what he’d write
“Mein Engel, I love you so so much, much more then you could ever believe, I’d do anything for you ♡ Please go out with me? I beg you, I’ll even get on my knees if you ask, please please go out with me. It’ll make me the happiest guy in the world, I’ll be so lucky if you do. I find it hard to believe you like me at all, but I promise I’ll be perfect for you ♡♡♡ Please, just one chance?”
You giggled as you put the paper away, looking forwards to hanging out w/him more
>Otoya
Otoya didn’t see the point in beating around the bush, so he approached you after school one day
“Hey, so you do like me, I was right!” He smirked with a smug face as he put his hands in his pockets
You hesitated, you should’ve expected that he’d be so direct and cocky. “If you’re just here to make fun of me you can go…” you mumbled, slightly embarrassed, and regretted sending the letter
He laughed “No no that’s not what i’m here for. I actually came to ask you out.” Otoya smiled, it seemed genuine, but who knows
“...Huh-?? You fr??” you were understandably skeptical, this man plays around with every girl
“Yea, 100%. I even stopped talking to other girls just for you, so you better accept.” 
“Wait you what-??”
“WHAT I’M TRYING TO SAY- is that I like you and we should go out.” He said, smiling, but his face was starting to flush
You notice this and found it quite amusing, “Alright alright, I’ll go out with you, Mr. F2ck Boy” you teased
He laughed, and gave you a quick kiss on the cheek, “Great, I’ll dm you the details” and with that, he left
Internally he was so happy, you actually agreed! He smiled to himself, looking like an idiot
Meanwhile, Karasu, Yukimiya, and Hiori watched from afar, silently laughing at him
>Karasu
In typical Karasu fashion, he felt the need to one up you. So he encrypted his letter as well, challenging you to decode it
He put the letter in front of you, and sat down on the other side of the table.
He had asked to meet with you, so you weren’t that surprised. You looked at the letter then back at him, “You sure you want me to read this in front of you?” you questioned
“Go ahead and try, this is the hardest one yet.” he sounded proud of himself for coming up with such a complex code
“Alright” you shrugged and picked up the paper.
You glanced through the paper, comparing the patterns and symbols. Karasu may’ve been proud, but this type of cipher was actually incredible common 
“Got it.” You looked up at him, only having stared at it for a few seconds 
Karasu’s jaw dropped “No you don’t- there’s no way you figured it out that quickly!”
You laughed “This is one of the most famous codes used in WWII, you know that right?”
“...”
You gave him an amused look, before reading his letter aloud to him “Dear [Y/N], I actually really like you too-”
“AHHIUSHEFLIUAGE;F- SHUT IT-” he stood up suddenly, embarrassed
You burst out laughing, “What’s wrong? Thought you were okay with me reading it in front of you?”
“YEA BUT NOT ALOUD-!!”
You continued to laugh, before gathering yourself as you read the letter while Karasu sat back down, burying his red face into his arms
You finished reading the letter with a smile, and tapped him on his head
He looked up at you, face still flushed, “So, whatcha say?” Karasu asked, barely louder than a whisper
“Sure, I’d love to” you responded, smiling
>Reo
“Reo, you should really try to focus more…. And i’m saying that-” Nagi commented. 
Reo had been spacing out for all of practice, and would occasionally groan or cry in embarrassment. He and Nagi were dropping off his love letter earlier that day, and you had caught them in the action. Reo froze up for a few seconds, as Nagi just watched, eventually having to drag him away and run
“ahHHHH NAGII IM SO STUPID” Reo cried, falling to his knees
“Yea I know, but seriously chill out…” 
“ :((( “
“...”
You were just about to grab your things from your locker to go home when you saw Reo sliding the envelope through the slits in the door. You just watched him, slightly shocked as he continued. 
Finally he stood up and turned around, making eye contact with you. 
Reo’s eyes shot open, his mouth slightly agape. He did NOT plan for you to see this- 
You both stood there for a second, before Nagi dragged Reo away, leaving you there to process what just happened.
You shook it off, and opened you locker, then the letter
“[Y/N], I love you, thank you so much for giving me a chance. I promise I’ll be the best man for you, would you like to join me for dinner?”
Despite the actual letter being pretty short, he had a whole speech on how much he loved you, prepared for when you two went out. He had also slipped a few $100 dollar bills in there, just for good measure ;)
Please go out with him, he’s gonna go emo if you don’t :( 
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A/N: Im not sure if i should be putting pt2 in the title, but maybe it helps with navigation so ill try it
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m1ckeyb3rry · 1 month
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Synopsis: Tabito Karasu has been in love with you for almost as long as he can remember. Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem like you have any intentions of reciprocating, considering you’ve only ever seen him as a child — and, more importantly, as your best friend’s little brother.
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BLLK Masterlist | Part Two | Otoya Version
Pairing: Karasu x Reader
Total Word Count: 41.6k
Content Warnings: reader is older than karasu (by like two years so it’s nbd but it exists), no blue lock au, bratty baby karasu, jealous karasu, slow burn, childhood friends, i have no idea how to write kids just deal w it, karasu’s older sister is given a name (look at that word count LMAO i’m not calling her ‘karasu’s older sister’ the entire time), reader gets drunk at one point, karasu the goat of pining, yukimiya and otoya mentions ⁉️
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A/N: yes this is inspired by the song “best friend’s brother” from victorious but has barely anything to do with it. yes this is probably the longest karasu fic you will ever read as of its publishing date (word count is not a typo it fr is that long). yes reader and karasu are fuck ass little kids for half of the fic. i have nothing to say for myself except that i love karasu so much and i cannot be stopped…also tumblr is an opp so i had to split this into two parts EEK i’m sorry!!
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In a sea of bright, patterned umbrellas, only one was dark and plain. It was wide, the practical sort, all but dwarfing the girl who held it as she hurried along to the covered entrance of the school, her shoulders hunched against the wind and her steps brisk. You thought that she seemed small for your age, like a particularly strong breeze might blow her away entirely, and strangely gloomy, though this might’ve been an effect of the weather and not her personality.
Your own umbrella was cheery, a pink-striped thing that announced its presence in a most domineering way and clashed with the shades of orange and teal and green around it. You had found it pretty when your parents had given it to you, but now you were much more taken with the sole matte black one that wove in and out of the crowd, the clear raindrops resting on it like diamonds.
By the time you were past the cherry trees lining the parking lot, you had lost the girl and her black umbrella alike. It should’ve been impossible, considering what an anomaly it was, but then again that color was like a shadow, blending in unless one looked for it very carefully, and sometimes even then.
You would’ve worried, but you had bigger problems to be preoccupied with — namely, it was your first day of elementary school, and you had no idea what to expect. Setting the girl out of your mind, you used your free hand to fiddle with the name tag on your breast pocket, ducking under the roof before closing your umbrella and shaking the excess water off of it. Then you scurried after an older student who seemed like they knew where they were going, following them until you found yourself in a corridor you recognized from the tour you had taken with your parents prior to the start of the year.
In the classroom, there was a shelf where you could put your wet umbrellas in neat rows. You didn’t see any rhyme or reason to how they had been arranged, except that everyone had avoided putting theirs beside the dull, dark umbrella that you had admired. Glancing around at the rest of your classmates, who had already grouped themselves into loose clusters based on their seats, you set your umbrella beside the black one. For some reason, the pink stripes at that angle resembled frowns; you found it suitable, then, that those two were the only ones on that shelf. They seemed to go together, depressed and angry in turn.
Although you had not seen the girl’s face, you recognized her immediately. She sat apart from everyone else, her spindly limbs held close to her body, her heart-shaped face dominated by a pair of sapphire eyes, hair like an oil spill pulled into a high ponytail that cascaded down her back like tail-feathers. At first glance, she was unassuming, and at second she was entirely off-putting, but you were contrarian enough to take a third, and it was only then that you realized she was actually magnetic in a way, her lips pulled into a serene smile, her irises lively and brows high with interest.
“Hello,” you said, taking the seat beside her. “I’m Y/N L/N.”
It was the radical thing, what you had done in willingly isolating yourself from the others, but you found that you had no interest in those shallow peers of yours, who had not bothered to look at a person three times and see the truth of their being. This girl, with her black umbrella and her keen gaze and her bird-like countenance, was the only one in the entire room you wanted to befriend.
“Are you talking to me?” she said. Her accent was more pronounced than yours, which resembled the one of your Tokyo-born parents’ far more than it did the rougher cadences that most people in the region spoke with. The boisterousness of her voice contrasted sharply with her frail appearance, though to charming effect, and it warmed you to her even more.
“Uh-huh,” you said. “It’s nice to meet you. What’s your name?”
“Karasu,” she said. “Yayoi Karasu. Good to meet you, too, L/N.”
Karasu. She was a crow, and as pretty and sharp as one, too. It was more fitting of a name than it ought to be, and you nodded, because your childish mind liked when things made sense, could be categorized into labeled boxes. Black umbrella. Blue eyes. Crow-wing hair. Yayoi Karasu.
“Let’s be friends,” you said, and maybe it was a blunt, straightforward request, but she did not seem to mind it.
“You want to be friends with me?” she said.
“Why wouldn’t I?” you said. She shrugged, bony shoulders brushing against her earlobes from the jerky motion.
“Don’t know. Just doesn’t seem like the others want to,” she said.
“The others are stupid. They’ll feel bad about it later, but by then we won’t need them,” you said.
“Okay,” she said. “Let’s be friends, L/N.”
“If we’re friends, then you can call me Y/N,” you said.
She grinned, wide and gleaming. “Only if you call me Yayoi. Just Yayoi.”
When you got home that night, the first thing you did was race to the living room, where your mother was sitting, knitting needles stationary in her hands as she watched a drama.
“Mama!” you said, jumping onto the sofa beside her, tugging on her sleeve until she paused her show and looked at you. “Mama, I made a friend today.”
“Did you? How exciting! What’s their name?” she said.
“Yayoi Karasu, but she said I can just say Yayoi ’cause we’re friends,” you said.
“That’s wonderful,” your mother said. “Do you want to have Yayoi over sometime?”
“Hm, yes, I think so,” you said, already envisioning how fun it would be to play with her outside of school. You supposed you didn’t know much about what she liked to do, but you doubted it was anything you wouldn’t also enjoy, so there wouldn’t be a problem. There couldn’t be — the two of you were friends, and there were never problems between friends.
Within two weeks came an invitation, made before you could extend your own. The Karasu family wanted you to come over, and though your parents wished they had asked first, they did not mind that you were going, especially considering how elated you were when you relayed the news.
It was a short walk to Yayoi’s house, or perhaps it was that you were so excited which shortened the distance; either way, it hardly took any time at all before you and your mother were at their doorstep. You hid behind her leg when she knocked, suddenly timid, although you had no reason to be.
The woman who answered the door resembled Yayoi greatly, though she was fuller and taller and exuded an air of great confidence. She could only be Yayoi’s mother, and you wondered if this was the kind of person Yayoi would grow up to be.
“Are you Mrs. Karasu?” your mother said. The woman nodded, gesturing you into the home invitingly.
“Yes! You must be Mrs. L/N — Y/N’s mother?” she said.
“That’s right. Y/N, please say hello to Mrs. Karasu,” your mother said.
“Hello, Mrs. Karasu,” you said, your voice catching in the back of your throat. She had the same voice as Yayoi, the same exuberance to her words and geniality to her tone, but coming from her, it was almost intimidating.
“Yayoi should be in the playroom — down that hallway, the first door on your left. I’m surprised she didn’t come to the door to greet you; your visit is all she’s been able to talk about for the entire week,” Mrs. Karasu said.
“Y/N, too,” your mother said affectionately. You left them to speak in the kitchen, darting in the direction Mrs. Karasu had indicated, ducking into an appealingly decorated playroom.
The walls were painted pale yellow, and there were colorful bins stacked in the corners, labels written on them in black marker which detailed what their contents were. There was no sign of Yayoi, but in the center of the room, surrounded by a rainbow of blocks, was a little boy holding a model train in his hands.
He had the same hair as Yayoi, though while hers was sleek and flat, his stuck up every which way, a bitter warning to those who might’ve tried to tame it. His cheeks were rounder than hers, and his eyes were darker, the same deep shade as mulberry stains, but there was undeniably a resemblance between the two.
Though he was quite taken by the train he was playing with, he looked up when you opened the door to the room, and then he cocked his head, thick eyebrows drawing together in confusion.
“Do you know where Yayoi is?” you tried, hoping he could understand you. He was obviously younger than you and Yayoi, though you were unsure by how much — a year? Two?
“Ya-yi?” he repeated, stumbling over her name endearingly.
“Yes, Yayoi,” you said. “Where is she?”
He hummed in a whimsical way which clearly meant he had no clue, and then he raised his hand with the toy in it, beaming at you.
“D’you like my train?” he said.
“Yeah, it’s a cool color,” you said, not wanting to hurt his feelings. As an only child, this sort of interaction was out of your realm of expertise, but for some reason, you had an urge to try your best.
“My favorite,” he said. “Light blue.”
“That’s a good favorite,” you said. “So. Are you Yayoi’s little brother?”
“Yes,” he said enthusiastically. “I’m Tabito. Who are you? Ya-yi’s friend?”
“I’m Y/N,” you said. “Yayoi’s friend from school.”
“Y/N!” he said, like your name was the greatest word he had ever learned. “Let’s play trains! Can you play trains with me? Can we please play trains?”
You frowned. You needed to find Yayoi, but it wasn’t like you could wander around their house aimlessly, and Mrs. Karasu knew you were in the playroom, so your best course of action was staying put until your friend found you. Then, if that was the case, there was really no harm in obliging him, even if you weren’t an avid train enthusiast.
“Sure, alright,” you said, sitting down across from him and holding your hand out. “Give me one.”
He blinked at you. “Get your own.”
“I don’t know where you keep them, so I can’t,” you said.
“Then, um, then you can build, okay?” he said, piling blocks into your waiting hands. “Make a bridge. Do you know what a bridge is?”
“Yes?” you said. He seemed delighted by this, his entire face glowing from the simple affirmation; eager to keep his spirits high, you pointed at a point on the carpet. “Can I build it here?”
“Um…okay,” he said. It didn’t seem like he was particularly keen on the notion, but you were out of ideas at that point, so you just shrugged and began to stack the blocks into something resembling the bridges you had driven past on trips to your grandparents’ respective homes in Tokyo.
Tabito was too busy rolling the trains around the playroom to supervise your attempts at construction, so you were left to your own devices, designing it in the way you saw fit. Right when you had deemed the structure finished and turned to ask him if he liked it, the door to the playroom slammed open and Yayoi bounced in, hugging a hamper to her chest.
“Y/N! I’m sorry, I went to get all of my toys from my room, but then I had to go to the bathroom, so that’s why I’m late,” she said.
“It’s okay,” you said.
“Ya-yi!” Tabito said. “You’re playing with your upstairs toys? Can I also?”
“No way!” Yayoi said, hiding the hamper behind her. “Go somewhere else and leave Y/N and I alone!”
His lower lip trembled, and then, though he had been so happy only moments earlier, he broke into wailing sobs, causing Yayoi to groan and face-palm. Within seconds, Mrs. Karasu had burst into the room, looking around and only calming when she realized you were all alright, or at the least uninjured.
“What’s the matter?” she said.
“I told Tabito to leave Y/N and I alone and he just started crying!” Yayoi said.
“You should be nicer to your younger brother,” her mother reprimanded her, hands on her hips. “He’s still little. It’s up to you to be the bigger person in these kinds of disagreements.”
“I don’t wanna! He’s annoying! Can’t you take him away? We want to play with our toys now!” Yayoi said.
Tabito cried harder at this, hiccuping as Mrs. Karasu swept him into her arms with a sigh.
“Now, now, Tabito, don’t be upset,” she said, using her sleeve to wipe his teary cheeks. “Let’s go watch TV and let your sister play with her friend.”
“Okay!” he said, the tantrum dissipating as quickly as it had come. He rested his chin on his mother’s shoulder, waving a small hand at you as he and Mrs. Karasu rounded the corner, leaving you and Yayoi to play on your own.
“Finally,” Yayoi said. “Little brothers are the worst.”
“He made me build a bridge for his trains,” you said, pointing at your attempt at architecture. Yayoi giggled.
“That looks nothing like a bridge,” she said.
“I did my best,” you said. “How old is he?”
“He’s four,” she said. “And a total pain.”
“Really?” you said. Setting aside the fit he had had when Yayoi had demanded he leave, he hadn’t seemed like anything but a typical and cute little kid.
“You don’t get it because you don’t have to live with him, but he’s the worst,” she said. “And my mom always takes his side, too! It’s super unfair.”
“I’m sorry,” you said.
“Don’t you have any siblings?” she said.
“No, I’m an only child,” you said.
“Ah, that makes sense,” she said. “Anyways. Sorry you had to play with him.”
“It wasn’t that bad,” you said. “I didn’t mind.”
“Huh. Whatever; do you want to see my favorite stuffed animals?” she said.
“Sure!” you said. She dumped the contents of the hamper on the floor, and thus began your playdate, which mostly consisted of her introducing her toys to you and you clapping appropriately.
You were fairly certain Yayoi was a good friend — in fact, you supposed you could even call her your best friend, though you didn’t have many others who could’ve taken the position, so it was as much by default as it was out of any perceived loyalty. Even still, it was true that she was someone you were genuinely fond of, and who was genuinely fond of you in return, so the title was earned and not just awarded at random.
It was nice being with Yayoi. As you came to learn, she was more practical than gloomy and more shy than off-putting. Once those initial guards came down, she was as affable as anyone, or maybe even more so. Your prediction came true in another sense; now that your classmates, too, saw the truth of yours and Yayoi’s personalities, they began to seek you out in droves, trying to befriend you both, to bring you into their folds and mix you into their exclusive groups.
The two of you entertained these attempts, of course — neither of you were loners at heart, and indeed felt quite at ease amidst throngs of people — but in the end, you never strayed far from each other. It was a known fact that you and her were best friends, that where one of you went, the other would not be far behind, and so your peers quickly decided to go for a sort of joint-befriending strategy.
“L/N, Karasu, do you guys want to come to the park with us this weekend? My mom’s bringing snacks and stuff,” one of your classmates asked you. You had advanced a grade since you had all met for the first time, so in theory all of you had known one another for at least a year at this point, but all you could recall of the short, stocky boy was that his name was something like Akamine or Arakawa.
Typically, Yayoi would glance at you for confirmation, but today she rapidly nodded her head at the boy. Akamine? Arakawa? You wished that he would introduce himself so you were spared the embarrassment of asking.
“We’d love to, Aoyama. Thank you for inviting us,” she said. Aoyama. You had been astoundingly off the mark; silently thanking Yayoi, who had no doubt picked up on your struggle if not your distaste, you grunted.
“Sure,” you said. You had no great desire to go, not when this Saturday was supposed to be the first fair day after a week of rain. You’d rather spend it doing something of your own choosing, not playing in a park with people you hardly knew. But Yayoi was going, so you would, too, dutifully and without much complaint. “Though we’ll have to ask our parents first.”
It was just a formality. Neither Yayoi’s parents nor yours ever denied you from frolicking about with your school-friends, as long as you had done everything you needed to at home. In Yayoi’s case, it was that they were happy that she was coming out of her shell so rapidly, and for you, it was because your parents found it difficult to say no to you when you were their only and most beloved child.
As your mother’s weather app had predicted, there was sunlight on Saturday — gray and watery, to be sure, but it held fast in its patch of sky, its small corner of periwinkle which contrasted with the silvery lavender of the looming thunderheads threatening another storm in the near future.
You arrived at the park before Yayoi, and so you pretended to be famished, looking through the snacks that Aoyama’s mother had brought while you waited for her to come.
When she did, it was with an expression not too dissimilar to the clouds on the horizon on her face and a set of small fingers squeezed in between hers, their owner struggling to keep up with her furious, stomping pace.
“You brought Tabito?” you said when she reached where you were waiting. Her younger brother stood at her side, wearing a dark blue raincoat and a pair of black mittens, though it wasn’t that cold out. Someone — you could only assume his mother — had attempted to comb his hair back into something resembling a neat style, but they had mostly been unsuccessful, for it had not been tamed any.
“It wasn’t my choice,” Yayoi said, shooting the oblivious boy a dark glare. “My mom made me. According to her, it’s good for siblings to play together.”
“Look, Y/N,” Tabito said, pulling on your sleeve to get your attention and then opening his mouth wide, revealing a gaping hole in the row of his pearly upper teeth. “I lost my first tooth!”
“Did you throw it in the air?” you said.
“Of course,” he said, very self-importantly and more than a little derisively, as if you had been a fool to suggest otherwise.
“Good job,” you said. He was in his last year of kindergarten, and so he would soon join you and Yayoi at your school, which meant he was eager to learn everything he could from you in order to prepare for the momentous leap. This meant that there was not a person in the world who was a better listener than him; given, of course, that one was prepared to entertain his multitude of questions and did not find the curiosity to be a nuisance.
“Yayoi, can we go on the swings?” he said. He had, in the time you had known the two of them, accustomed himself to saying her name properly, though this was only a small consolation to the irritable Yayoi, who would rather he not say her name at all.
“Maybe later,” she said. “Right now, Y/N and I are going to play with our friends, but after that, we can go on the swings, okay? You just sit here and don’t get into trouble for a bit.”
For a moment, it seemed like he would argue, but around Tabito, Yayoi became a much bossier and more tyrannical version of herself, a version whose commands were impossible to deny, and so he only nodded.
“Come back quickly so we can swing,” he said beseechingly. Yayoi ruffled his hair, undoing her mother’s efforts entirely, and then she jutted her chin out in the direction of your classmates.
“We’ll be back before you know it,” she said.
“Do you think he’ll be okay if we just leave him there?” you said as you both walked towards where everyone was gathering on the slides.
“Yes, it’s not an issue,” she said. “He’ll be mopey for a bit, but that’s just the way of things. It’s his fault for getting upset when I said he couldn’t come with me and involving our mom in it! If he wanted to swing, he should’ve just waited until tomorrow when I said the two of us could go by ourselves instead of insisting he wanted to come today and see all of my friends.”
“Aw,” you said. “It’s kind of sweet that he wanted to meet your friends.”
“Try stupid,” she said. “Do you think any of them, besides you, will really be nice to him? It would’ve been better if he just stayed at home, but I didn’t want my mom to get mad at me.”
“That’s true,” you said. “Well, you would know better, so don’t take me too seriously.”
“I wish we could swap places,” she said. “I’d love to be an only child, and obviously you want a younger brother, so it would make everyone happy if we could trade roles, don’t you think?”
“You’d be sad if you didn’t have a sibling,” you said. “It’s a little bit lonely sometimes.”
“Seriously, you can have Tabito if you want,” she scoffed. “You’ll change your mind soon enough.”
She got carried away in a conversation with Aoyama after that. He was only too happy to oblige, although a needling sensation on the back of your neck alerted you to the fact that he was gazing at you all the while. You paid him no mind, though, preferring to observe everyone as they mingled about, waiting to see if anyone you could manage to tolerate would manifest.
Aoyama and his ilk were the sort of boneheaded future sports players that you least preferred. Normally, you were more outgoing than this, but in a group where you were so glaringly out of place, you withdrew into yourself, shrinking like a violet away from their brashness, which lacked a necessary amiability that would’ve made them far more approachable.
At one point, in an attempt to avoid Aoyama and his frequent stares, you glanced over your shoulder, pretending like you were checking on Tabito out of some sisterly duty. As an extension of Yayoi, it only made sense that you’d feel that same protective instinct for him, so no one questioned it when you muttered a quick farewell and made a beeline for where he was sitting.
Somehow, he had managed to stay in one place on the bench, his hands folded in his lap and his legs kicking in the air as he looked out at Yayoi forlornly. For some reason, he reminded you of a kitten which had been abandoned by its owner, so you stopped before him and poked him on the forehead to get his attention.
“Tabito,” you said. “Do you still want to go on the swings?”
“Yeah,” he said. “Is Yayoi coming?”
“Not yet,” you said. “But we can go together if you want.”
“You don’t want to play with your friends?” he said, hopping down from the bench and following you towards the swings anyways.
“Not really,” you said. “I’m only close with Yayoi anyways, and she’s busy with Aoyama at the moment.”
“Oh,” he said. It was an utterance filled with wisdom, or maybe that was just the impression he was trying to give off. Yet you earnestly believed at that moment that, despite his age, he understood what you meant when you said that, so you chose to think that it was the former.
“Do you need help getting on the swing?” you said when you reached the swing set.
“No, I can do it!” he said. “Watch, watch!”
He executed an inexplicable series of maneuvers that you could neither replicate nor even fathom, but somehow it ended up with him sitting squarely on the swing, his pale-knuckled hands gripping the chains tightly.
“Wow,” you said. “That was cool. Are you ready?”
“Yup!” he said. You pushed his back lightly, sending him soaring into the air, and the two of you continued in that manner for a while. It was meditative in a way; your mind was blank and the world was silent, save for the whistling of the wind. You didn’t have to care about what your annoying classmates would say next, or whether they were named Akamine or Arakawa or Aoyama or whatever.
If Tabito was your little brother, you’d take him to the playground every single day, and you’d push him on the swing for as long as he wanted. You were overcome with a sickening wave of jealousy for Yayoi, who could’ve done that but never did, and you wondered if this was how she felt towards you. Was it really that no one could ever just be satisfied with what they had? If you had been born with a sibling, would you have detested them as surely as Yayoi did Tabito?
There was another roll of thunder, louder and nearer this time than the last. A fat droplet of rain landed on your nose, and when Tabito next came closer to you, you caught him so that he would stop.
“What happened?” he said. “I want to keep swinging.”
“It looks like it’s about to start raining earlier than we thought,” you said. There was another droplet of rain, and then another, and another, in quicker and quicker succession until there was a verifiable deluge coming down. Tabito slid off of the swing, his left hand in your right as he pulled the hood of his raincoat up.
“Tabito!” It was Yayoi, running towards you and shouting frantically. “Y/N!”
“Yayoi, we should go!” you said as she skidded to a stop in the mulch bed of the swing set. She nodded, her eyelashes already clumping together, water trickling down her forehead. Grabbing Tabito’s other hand, she used her arm to cover her head, and you mirrored her actions, though it didn’t do much in the way of keeping you dry.
“My house is closer!” she shouted over another crack of thunder. All of you took off at a sprint, splashing through rapidly forming puddles without abandon as you raced towards her house, dragging Tabito along with you.
There was a sort of euphoria to it, and indeed you were all laughing as you went, despite the terror you felt with every new stroke of lightning. Tabito made sure to bring down his feet extra hard in the puddles, much to yours and Yayoi’s collective chagrin, as you were continuously sprayed with mud from his actions, but it was hard to tell him to stop when he was enjoying himself so thoroughly.
The three of you collapsed in the Karasus’ foyer right before the drumming beat of the rain increased even more, locking the door behind you and gasping for breath as you recovered from the exhausting run, Tabito sprawled atop Yayoi and your head leaning against her shoulder.
“I’m glad we’re all alright,” Yayoi said, hugging her brother tightly. He squirmed in her embrace, which only prompted her to squeeze him tighter until he yelled in protest.
“You three are a mess!” Mrs. Karasu said. Either the shutting of the door or Tabito’s shout had summoned her; regardless, she looked down at the set of you in fond disapproval, tugging you all to your feet. “By the time I’m done calling Y/N’s parents and letting them know where she is, I expect all of you to be washed up and in fresh clothes!”
You all exchanged glances before running up the stairs, shoving each other out of the way as you went, none of you wanting to be the last one to follow her directives, leaving behind wet footprints on the carpet wherever you stepped.
The next year, Tabito started primary school. For the most part, he walked to and from the building with you and Yayoi, holding onto his sister’s hand and listening to your conversations, frequently peppering his own interjections in. Every Wednesday, though, Yayoi had badminton club meetings, and you had art club, so he was left to walk by himself. Conversely, on Thursdays, he had soccer club — he was one of the youngest members, but he had been playing for two years at that point and could not fathom not joining the school team — which meant that you and Yayoi could dawdle as you wanted, walking at your own paces instead of the erratic one that Tabito often set.
That Wednesday, you were approached by Aoyama, who was a fellow member of the art club. He had neither the skill nor the aptitude for it, his paintings messy, the strokes of his calligraphy thick and runny, but no one could say he wasn’t determined. More than anyone in the entire club, he really tried his hardest, which was likely the sole reason he hadn’t yet been kicked out.
“Hey, L/N,” he said, jamming himself in between you and Yayoi as you walked to your afternoon classes. You sighed, having never found him agreeable despite how persistent he was. Yayoi gave him a dirty look; whatever friendliness she had had for him last year had long since vanished, replaced with the same disdain you held.
“Yes, Aoyama?” you said.
“Did you see art club’s canceled today?” he said.
“No, I didn’t. I haven’t had the chance to check the bulletin board. Did it say why?” you said.
“The teacher’s sick,” he said.
“I hope she gets better soon,” you said.
“Me, too,” he said. “I love the art club.”
“You sure do,” Yayoi said under her breath, earning an appreciative snicker from you and a perplexed look from Aoyama. She was privy to everything that happened in the art club courtesy of you; in exchange, she kept you updated about the goings-on of the badminton club, though these stories were decidedly less amusing, owing to the fact that most of the badminton club members were too dedicated to the sport to waste time with anything foolish enough to be entertaining.
Aoyama was bad at telling when he was unwanted, but even he could not deny that his presence was not required, and furthermore was an active impediment to your day. With a mumbled goodbye, he sped up so that he could reach your classroom before you and Yayoi, finally leaving you be once more.
“He’s so weird,” you said.
“Right?” Yayoi said. “Totally crazy. At least he was kind of helpful this time and only let you know that you don’t have art club today.”
“True, I was kind of scared he’d try to invite us to hang out with him again,” you said with a shudder. The corners of her eyes crinkled in sympathy.
“I think his birthday’s coming up. Do you think we’ll get invited to the party?” she said.
“I don’t know. Probably not. Girls and boys don’t go to each other’s birthday parties,” you said. “He might, though. It seems like he thinks we’re friends.”
“I guess we’ll see,” she said. “Are you just going to go home after school, then?”
“Yeah, it’s not like I have anything else to do,” you said. “Want me to walk with Tabito?”
“He’ll be alright if you don’t, but if you want to go that way, then it wouldn’t hurt,” she said. There were two routes you could take to get home from the school; one passed by the Karasu house, and the other was slightly shorter but in a different direction. Technically, you could’ve taken the second route today, but you didn’t mind walking for an extra minute or so to help out.
“Sure, I can do that. Do you think he’ll wait in the usual spot?” you said.
“Probably not. It’s not like he knows your meeting was canceled,” she reasoned. “But you should be able to catch up to him pretty quickly. He’s kind of distractible.”
It was true. Though he was a quick walker, Tabito was prone to stopping and staring at things which only he noticed, so it was hard to actually get to places in a reasonable time with him. That fact, combined with your comparatively longer strides, meant that even if he didn’t explicitly wait for you, you’d almost surely be able to walk most of the way home with him.
Students rolled out like an orderly tide the moment the bell rang, a veritable ocean of pressed shirts and dark shoes and jostling bags. Without an agreed-upon meeting point, it was impossible to find a person in the throng, and indeed you did not even attempt it, merely weaving through until the crowd began to thin as everyone dispersed, heading in different directions towards their respective homes and after-school activities.
It took you longer than you expected to find Tabito. He was standing in a patch of grass along the side of the road, his chin tilted up as he stared at a bird in wonder; it was so quintessentially him that you did not realize at first that something was wrong.
“Tabito!” you said cheerfully, tapping on his shoulder to get his attention. “My art club meeting got canceled, so we can walk back — did something happen?”
The jewel-like shade of his irises threw the rosy rims around his eyes into further relief. His dark lashes were bunched together with wetness, and his cheeks were puffy. Though he fought it, his lower lip trembled, and he sniffed when he noticed you frowning.
“No,” he said.
“Obviously, something did,” you said matter-of-factly. “Why are you crying?”
“I’m not crying,” he mumbled.
“You can tell me what’s bothering you. I won’t make fun of you or anything,” you said. He shrugged stubbornly, shifting from foot to foot, gripping the straps of his backpack in his fists. You tried to think of what could’ve upset him. “Did you get yelled at in class?”
“No,” he said.
“Did you get in a fight with one of your friends?” you said.
“No,” he said.
“Hm. Has someone been messing with you?” you said. He was silent, but you knew you must’ve hit the mark because his cool facade — which was already terribly maintained in the first place — crumbled away entirely, his face falling and a small hiccup escaping him. “Oh, I see. You should’ve said something to Yayoi and I. Who is it? I'll yell at them.”
“It won’t help if you do,” he said quietly. “It’s better to just ignore them. I mean, it’s an average problem, so don’t make a big deal about it. They’ll probably go away after a while.”
“But it isn’t fair for you to have to deal with that on your own,” you said. “It’s not like it’s your fault. People like that just pick on whoever they have the chance to pick on. There’s those kinds of kids in my grade, too. Like you said, it’s common, but that doesn’t mean you have to accept it.”
“If you say something, it’ll just be worse the next time,” he said. “They’ll go away if I don’t pay attention to them. It’s not like I even care what they say. It doesn’t matter to me.”
When you pretended to look at the road, he brought up his forearm, rubbing his sleeve against his eyes in the moment where there was no one to notice. You saw it, but you did not bring it up, recognizing that it was something he’d rather not discuss.
“Alright,” you said as you set out towards his house. “If that’s what you want.”
“Yeah,” he said.
“But if you change your mind, or if you’re ever having another problem, I hope you know I don’t mind helping,” you said. “Think of me as another Yayoi.”
“You’re not like Yayoi,” he said.
“Well, no, of course not,” you said. “I can be like an older sister for you, though, the way she is. Do you get it now?”
“I don’t want you to be an older sister for me,” he said crossly, kicking a piece of stray gravel across the road. “And I won’t have any other problems.”
The only way to tame his unruly hair was with wax, which made it as stiff as a board and completely impossible for you and Yayoi to ruffle it the way you used to. You had to settle for poking him in the cheek; considering it irritated him no less, it was a worthy substitute.
“Are you trying to be all grown up just because you’re in elementary school now? You’re still a little kid, so no need to act tough,” you said.
“I’m not a little kid!” he whined.
“Sure,” you said.
“I’m not! I’m only two years younger than you, it’s not a lot!” he insisted. You grinned at him.
“It is a lot. You just started elementary school, and this is my third year here. That means I’m way more experienced than you, so you should look up to me,” you said.
He folded his arms across his chest, grumbling something to himself that he wouldn’t dare vocalize to you, all thoughts of whoever had been bothering him earlier vanished. Maybe it wasn’t the best method of cheering him up, but though his mood had not improved, at least it had changed. That was the best you could do, so as he held onto your hand while you crossed the street, you congratulated yourself on the small victory.
As Tabito continued through primary school, two things became evident: one, he was uncannily smart, his eerily observant nature lending itself to a genuine academic prowess that one could consider exceptional, and two, because of his pride in this ability, he refused to ask anyone for assistance, no matter how hard he was struggling.
“It’s so dumb,” Yayoi told you one day at recess, scrubbing at a graphite stain that someone else had left on her desk. “He’s totally lost with long division, but whenever my parents or I offer to help him, he gets super mad at us. Even my grandma tried! Although she doesn’t really remember much about mathematics, so I don’t know what the point was there…”
“He’s always been the independent type, though,” you said. “It’s not a surprise.”
“It’ll be a surprise when he does terribly on his next test,” she said. “Considering how things have been going as of late and how badly he’s been doing on his homework assignments.”
You swept stray eraser bits littering the floor into a neat pile and then gathered them in a dustpan, pouring them into the trashcan Yayoi had dragged over for your convenience, thinking this over.
“I can try helping him,” you said. “You have badminton club today, right? So it’ll just be us two walking home. I can ask him if he wants me to explain it.”
Unlike the previous year, when both of your clubs had met on the same day, Yayoi’s badminton club meetings were now held on Thursdays. This was because the previous club supervisor had stepped down, and the sole teacher willing to fill the vacancy was only free on that day.
“Good luck with that,” Yayoi said.
“Tabito’s my buddy,” you said. “I’m sure he’ll be okay with it.”
Likely due to your closeness with Yayoi — you had been each other’s best friends for going on four years now, after all — you had built up some kind of relationship with her little brother, who was usually present whenever you went to see her. Most of the time it felt like he was your sibling, too, and certainly he was one of the few kids his age that you could tolerate without looking down on too much.
“Yayoi mentioned you’ve been having some trouble with long division,” you said that afternoon. It was a pleasant day, the vast blue of the sky unmarred by clouds, except for a few which were so fleecy and eggshell-pale that almost no one could be offended by them. The season was spring, and soon it would be unbearably hot, but for now, it was lovely and breezy and you were content with things as they were.
“She’s making it up,” Tabito said.
“Really? That’s great,” you said. “I always found long division super difficult. I had to have my parents explain it to me a few times before I got it.”
He eyed you warily. “You did? I thought you were good at school. Yayoi always says you’re the smartest person in your class.”
“I don’t know about being the smartest person in the class or anything, but I’m pretty good at school, yeah,” you said. “I mean, I always get full marks on my exams, don’t I? That’s because I don’t feel shy about asking for help when I need it. Isn’t it better to deal with problems when they first happen? Because if you wait too long, you’ll only get more and more lost; then, you’ll need even more help than if you had just gotten it out of the way at the start.”
“That’s true,” he said.
“If you don’t want Yayoi or your parents to help you, then I don’t mind doing it. We finished cleaning early in recess, so we got our homework done then, and my parents won’t mind if I stay at your house for a little bit,” you said.
“Okay!” he said eagerly. You were taken aback; you had fully believed that he’d take more convincing than just that, but here he was, as excited as anything, all but rejuvenated at the prospect. Perhaps it really was that relieving to be given the permission to ask for help as well as a method to receive it. “After you help me, can we play together?”
You didn’t necessarily want to play with him, but he said it with such wide, shimmery eyes that you could not help nodding in agreement. You weren’t quite sure what playing with him entailed, but you doubted it would be anything difficult, and you supposed you didn’t have much else to do that afternoon, so it wasn’t as if it was some great sacrifice.
Tabito and Yayoi’s grandmother was the only other one who was home at that time, so you and Tabito spread out your things on the dining table without worry, taking out pencils and graph paper so that you could discuss the issue at hand.
“What part are you having difficulty with?” you said.
“Um,” he said. You waited, but he only twirled his pencil in one hand, training his gaze on the blank sheet of paper.
“If you don’t tell me, I can’t explain it,” you said. “I won’t make fun of you.”
“You promise?” he said.
“Yes, I promise,” you said.
“All of it,” he said. “The teacher explained it too quickly.”
“That’s okay,” you said kindly. “There’s nothing to be ashamed of. Here, I’ll show you, and if it’s too fast, then tell me so I know to slow down.”
Thankfully, he was quick on the uptake, and within a few minutes, he was able to complete the practice problems on his homework without any hassle or intervention from you. You were glad to see the ease with which he approached the things he had been struggling with only moments previously, finding that his success was also yours, in a way.
He continued working until his entire sheet was filled out, and then he snapped the book shut and shoved it back in his bag. You did the same, clearing the table of the mess you had made and packing your own bag with your supplies.
“You didn’t forget that you’re going to play with me, right?” he said. You put your folder into the back pocket of your backpack and shook your head.
“No, but I don’t want the table to be disorderly if your parents come back from work early or if your grandmother needs it for something,” you said. He seemed suspicious, snatching your bag from you once he could tell that you were finished putting everything into it.
“I’ll put it with mine,” he informed you. “You can take it once we’re done playing.”
“Uh, okay,” you said, bemused. He ran up the stairs, a backpack hanging off of each arm, and returned with the same speed he had left with, a net in his hands. You gave him a confused look at the odd choice in toys. “What’s that for?”
“It’s springtime, so we can catch bugs,” he said, unlatching the back door. You made a face, having no interest in bugs, but you had said that you’d play with him already, so with a sigh, you traipsed out into the Karasus’ backyard with him.
Fortunately, Tabito was pretty flexible with his definition of playing. He wandered around, capturing bugs and bringing them to you so you could see, but for the most part he left you to sit under one of their flowering trees, leaning against the trunk and closing your eyes in something that was not quite sleep but was very close to it.
The blossoms perfumed the air so that it was sweet and fresh, and the shadows of the tree-boughs were lacy and delicate on your face. Petals fell into your hair and against your skin, and a soft wind murmured through the grass, swearing a million hushed things to you, things that you could only decipher at this edge of consciousness.
You realized dreamily that it had been quite some time since you had been jostled awake by Tabito, who up until that point had been quite steadily displaying his catches — which were mostly of the mundane, garden variety — to you with great flourish. Wondering what he was doing, you fluttered your eyes open, only to find him standing a few steps in front of you, his net loose at his side, wearing an expression of awe the likes of which you had never seen on anyone before, least of all him. When you opened your mouth to ask him what he was doing, he shook his head rapidly.
“Shh,” he said, voice barely above a whisper. “You’ll scare it.”
“What?” you said. “Scare what?”
“Oh, no,” he said as his statement came true, the butterfly which had been resting on your nose taking wing at the sound of your voice. You gasped, for you had thought the brush of its legs to be nothing but flowers shaken loose from their branches, and your hand flew to your face, fingers grazing over where it had been sitting only moments previously.
The butterfly had wings the same blue-violet color as Tabito’s eyes, framed with black and interspersed with pale spots. It floated away lazily and easily, dipping back towards you once before disappearing into the sky for good, flying somewhere far out of your reach. You both watched it go in silence — for some reason, it didn’t feel right to speak in that moment, as if you would interrupt something very sacred and precious if you did.
“That was a great purple emperor,” he said after a while. “Sasakia Charonda. It’s the national butterfly of Japan.”
“I’ve never seen one before,” you said, your heart racing, though you had no clue why.
“They usually stay up high,” he said. “That’s what the book Yayoi gave me said. Apparently, they only come down if they’re looking for food.”
“What do they like to eat?” you said. Insects were his interest at the moment; he jumped from topic to topic, reading as much as he could about one subject and then moving on to another when he grew bored. Yayoi found it frustrating when he began to talk about whatever he was fixated on at the moment, but you liked to indulge him when you could. After all, you would give anything to have someone who would listen to you, but if you could not have that, then you would at least like to be that person for another. For him.
“Sap and nectar and fruit juice, I think,” he said. “They prefer sweet things.”
You smiled. “It must have found me sweet, then, for it to have stayed there for so long.”
You couldn’t understand why, but his cheeks turned pink like the flowers blooming overhead, and then he spun on his heel and stormed inside without further response, leaving you to look back up at the sky and wonder if you’d ever see that butterfly again.
At twelve years old, you and Yayoi graduated elementary school alongside the rest of your peers. It was the biggest moment of your lives up until that point, a cause of terror as much as celebration. Junior high would be an entirely different experience than the one you had grown accustomed to, and the only consolation was that you both were attending the same one, so you would have each other’s company through the transition and beyond.
The graduation ceremony was short, with the principal giving a speech and then leading the parents in a round of applause for your achievements. Your mother and father sat beside Yayoi’s; Tabito was there, too, in between his grandmother and a man who bore a resemblance to your classmate Aoyama.
Tabito was ten now, and he was entirely contrary, doing the exact opposite of whatever he was told. It was especially so when the one telling him to do something was a person he was related to — namely, Yayoi, who frequently gave up and begged you to boss him around for her instead. He was less reluctant to follow your commands, though this might’ve been because you phrased them more as requests than anything.
He had not mentioned it outright, but given his amenability as of late, you sensed that he’d miss you and Yayoi once you began to attend junior high. It’d mean he was left alone, after all, left alone where once he had had you two as his companions. He was old enough now that you did not worry as much — if anyone tried to bother him the way they had when he was younger, you were assured that he’d manage them without breaking a sweat, but still, just because he did not need you and did not acknowledge it did not mean that he did not want you there.
His bored expression vanished when he met your eyes, the corners of his mouth lifting as he raised his hand in a shy wave. You could not wave back, not when you were supposed to maintain your composure onstage, but you dipped your chin ever-so-slightly in acknowledgement, scrunching your nose at him when you were sure your teacher was not looking.
As soon as the ceremony was completed, you filed off of the stage to meet your families outside. The moment your principal dismissed you, you took off towards your parents, leaping into your mother’s arms with a squeal.
“You did it!” she said.
“Congratulations, Y/N,” your father said, the lines of his face deepening from the force of his grin. “We’re so proud of you.”
“I can’t believe it,” you said. “Yayoi and I are going to go to middle school next year.”
“Both of you are going to do amazing,” your mother said.
“That’s for certain,” your father agreed. “Did you want to go talk to the Karasus? I’m sure that boy of theirs wants to say hi.”
They exchanged one of those looks that you were frustratingly aware of but could never interpret, and then they ushered you towards where Yayoi was standing with her family.
“Y/N!” Mrs. Karasu said when she noticed you. “Wonderful job, honey. We’re all so happy that you and Yayoi are going to continue to go to school together!”
“It’s true, we were just talking about it,” Mr. Karasu said. “It’s a lucky thing.”
“Isn’t it? And lucky for us, too, I’d say,” your father said. Mr. Karasu chuckled, slapping your father on the back in agreement. Thanks to you and Yayoi, your parents had become close, and indeed your fathers often claimed that they were each other’s ‘only friends.’ They were as glad as you were that you would not be split apart. After all, you doubted they could handle meeting new people and befriending them after so long together.
Your parents began to reminisce over the days when you and Yayoi were younger, and when you looked for Yayoi, you saw that she was talking to her grandmother, who she had always been close with. This left you to glance around in search of someone else to speak with yourself, though unfortunately, you soon came to the realization that there were not so many options.
“Y/N.” It was Tabito standing in front of you, his hands clasped behind his back. He scuffed the toe of his shoe against the pavement periodically, far more interested in the plumes of dust it created than anything, his head inclined towards his feet instead of at you. “Good job.”
“Thanks!” you said, glad to have a conversation partner. “It’ll be you, soon. Just two years! Are you excited?”
“Yeah, I guess so,” he said. “I don’t know if I’ll be able to go to the same junior high school as you, though.”
“That’s okay,” you said. “Even if you did, it would only be for one year, and then we’d be graduating again. You should make the choice based on what’s right for you, not where Yayoi and I are.”
“What happens if you and Yayoi don’t go to high school together?” he said.
“Why are you already thinking about us going to high school? That’s so far away,” you said.
“I just wanna know,” he said. “Will you stop being friends with her?”
“I don’t think so,” you said. “I’d have no reason to. Besides, if that happens, we’ll already have been friends for over nine years. It’s hard to abandon someone you’ve known for that long. Why do you ask? Are you worried that you’ll lose your friends when you graduate? You shouldn’t be.”
“I don’t want you to stop being friends with Yayoi,” he said. You raised your eyebrows at him.
“You try to act all cool, but you’re actually a really caring little brother, you know,” you said. “It’s sweet of you to worry about her, but it’ll take a lot more than attending different schools to break us apart, and even if something like that happens, she’ll easily make more friends, so it’s no cause to stress.”
“That’s not—”
“L/N, hey!”
Whatever Tabito was going to say was cut off by the arrival of your fellow art club member, Aoyama. He grabbed you in a hug before you could react, squeezing you in a vice grip that was impossible to escape from. You patted him on the back awkwardly until he let you go, though his fingers remained on your upper arms and he stayed leaning close to you.
“Hey, Aoyama,” you said. “Congrats on graduating.”
“You, too,” he said. “Oh, who’s this?”
“Yayoi’s little brother,” you said. Aoyama squinted at Tabito before nodding.
“I can see it — there’s definitely a resemblance. Hi, little Karasu! I’m Aoyama. I’ve been in the same class as your older sister and L/N here for the past few years,” he said. The way he introduced himself made it seem as if the three of you were particularly close, but indeed, other than your weekly art club meetings, neither you nor Yayoi had interacted much with the boy in the past couple of years.
“Hi,” Tabito said stiffly.
“He’s two years younger than us,” you added, in an attempt to smooth over Tabito’s surliness.
“That’s it?” Aoyama said. “He looks so small.”
“I’m not small!” Tabito said, but considering how much shorter he was than you and Aoyama, it wasn’t that convincing. He must’ve realized this, as his face grew red and his shoulders dropped, his lips drawing into a childish pout.
“Maybe it runs in the family,” Aoyama said. “Yayoi’s pretty tiny, too.”
“Well, it was good to see you, Aoyama,” you said, sensing that the conversation might take a turn for the worse very soon. “We should probably get back to our families, so…”
“No problem! See you next year?” he said.
You had forgotten that Aoyama, too, would be attending the same junior high as you and Yayoi, along with a handful of your other classmates. Nodding slightly and placing a hand on Tabito’s shoulder to steer him towards Yayoi, you waved at Aoyama.
“See you next year! Let’s go, Tabito,” you said.
There was a sullen quality to the stomp of his feet, but until Aoyama was out of earshot, he did not say anything to explain it. The moment the boy was gone, though, Tabito was whirling to face you, looking up at you plaintively.
“Do you think I’m small?” he demanded. It seemed his pride, which he guarded so fiercely, had been wounded by Aoyama’s comment. Even if you found it silly, it wasn’t unreasonable when you thought about it, so you did not make fun of him.
“Of course, right now you are,” you said. “It’s only natural. Eventually, you’ll grow, and then you won’t be.”
“I’ll be super tall when I’m an adult,” he said. “Taller than that guy.”
“Aoyama?” you said.
“Whatever his name is,” he said. “I’ll be taller than him, and — and — and better at soccer, too!”
“He doesn’t play soccer, so you’re already better than him at it,” you said. “Even if he did, though, I bet you wouldn’t have to try to beat him. You’re really good.”
He grunted. “Thanks.”
Though he tried to disguise it, it was obvious that he was pleased by the compliment. There was a spring to his step and a sparkle to his eyes as you rejoined your families, and you knew that you had once again succeeded in cheering him up, as you often took it upon yourself to do.
During your next summer term break, Yayoi insisted on going to the pool with you. She had heard that the next unit in your Physical Education class was going to be swimming, so even though you had not been assigned the practice as a requirement, she wanted to take advantage of your natural aptitude at the activity and get some time in so that she wasn’t behind.
“What’s your secret?” she nagged you as you, she, and Tabito walked towards your junior high school’s main building. Because of the swimming club, the pool was left open year-round, and even outside of practices, members of the student body were allowed to utilize the pool for their own reasons. Tabito wasn’t a student, but since he was with you and Yayoi, there was a high likelihood that nobody would even notice; besides, hardly anyone ever used the pool at this hour, so all in all there wouldn’t be any issues.
“Secret to what?” you said.
“Being so good at swimming! I can’t believe you didn’t join the club,” she said.
“It’s just something I like doing for fun. If I had to do it for the school club, I’d probably end up hating it,” you said. “Anyways, I don’t know. There’s no secret to it. I just get in the water and do what the teachers tell us to.”
Even in elementary school, you had been given rudimentary swim lessons as a part of your Physical Education class, but middle school would take those lessons to a far more brutal extent, at least according to Yayoi’s sources from the badminton club. You weren’t worried, but whatever information she had heard from her upperclassmen had terrified her enough that she was convinced you needed to spend every spare minute you had in the water.
“That’s what I do, but it looks so much easier when you do it,” she said, scanning her student card and motioning for you and Tabito to follow her through the open door.
“I don’t know. Things always look easier when you’re watching another person do them,” you said. “I’m sure it’s just as hard for me as it is for you.”
“Maybe,” she said.
“Do you like swimming, Tabito?” you said, taking off your shirt and pants, adjusting the straps of your bathing suit, which had twisted on the way to the pool. He had remained oddly quiet the entire time that you and Yayoi had been talking, which was out of character, considering he had been the one to insist on coming with you two.
“It’s okay,” he said. “I haven’t done it much before, so I don’t know.”
“Tabito’s afraid of the water,” Yayoi said. “He always cries when we go to the beach.”
“I don’t! Stop making things up, Yayoi,” he said. She snickered, already halfway down the stairs leading to the shallow end, the water licking around her thighs as she flopped backwards into the pool. As you had predicted, there was no one else there, so you had the entire area to yourselves, allowing you to be less focused in your efforts. Yayoi floated down the lane on her back, not even bothering to kick, her dark hair fanning out in a curtain around her waist, looking akin to a pair of unfurled wings fluttering in the wind.
“You so do,” she said. “I don’t know why you begged to come with us. I bet you won’t even go in the water, you chicken.”
“I am not a chicken!” he snapped, trailing after you like a shadow as you made your way over to the deep end.
“You definitely are,” Yayoi said. “Chicken, chicken!”
“Come on, Yayoi, that’s enough,” you said, stretching your arms and preparing to dive in. “It’s okay. He doesn’t have to swim if he doesn’t want to. There’s nothing wrong with being afraid of the water, especially not given that he’s still in primary school.”
Tabito puffed his cheeks out. “I’m not scared of the water. Only babies are, and I’m not a baby. I’m gonna swim just like you.”
“How about we do it together, then?” you bargained. Although Yayoi liked to tease Tabito, she would not lie or make things up solely to bully him, which meant that he really was frightened of the water. And if that was the case, then it’d be foolish of you to leave him alone, especially if he couldn’t even swim, the way she had been hinting he could not.
“That sounds good,” he said. You took his hand in between yours, interlocking your fingers with his tightly, so there was no chance that he’d accidentally let go, and then you leapt into the pool, pulling him after you. He let out a shriek at the suddenness, but then you hit the water and he was cut off by the cold temperature and the tangy, burning taste of chlorine.
A rush of bubbles surrounded you, the coruscating clear-blue obscuring your vision, but even before they could burst away into nothingness, you were pushing off the pool floor, dragging Tabito behind you until you reached the surface and he could gasp for breath.
His legs wrapped around your waist as your own churned the water, treading it to keep the both of you afloat, and his fingers clawed at your shoulders, digging them into your skin hard enough to bruise. When he tucked his cheek to your pulse, you noticed that his breaths were coming in harsh, short pants, his entire frame trembling against yours.
“Tabito,” you said gently. “You’ll have to let go so I can swim to the shallow end.”
“I can’t,” he said. “If I let go, I’ll drown.”
“If you don’t let go, we’ll both drown,” you said. “I’m not strong enough to keep treading water forever, and I don’t think Yayoi could save us both if it came to it.”
You weren’t worried yet, but it was true that at some point, you’d get tired, and then you’d be in trouble. Yet you also knew you had to be soft, for it seemed his fear was far more paralyzing than you had anticipated, and if he began to genuinely panic, then he might accidentally drown you both.
“Y/N,” he whispered, his face hidden in the hollow of your collarbone. “I am scared.”
“I know,” you said, using one hand to stroke along his bony spine, the other swishing back and forth to assist your efforts in staying above the surface. “But sometimes, you still have to do things, even when you’re afraid.”
“I can’t do it, though,” he sniffed. “I can’t at all.”
“Is everything okay?” Yayoi shouted from the shallow end.
“It’s fine!” you called back, knowing that Tabito might rather drown than let her know of this weakness. “Tabito, listen, I’m not going to let you go. Even if you let go of me, I won’t do the same. Do you trust me when I say that?”
“Yes,” he said immediately.
“Then prove it and leave me,” you said.
Slowly, almost painstakingly, he removed his arms from around you and drew his legs back. For the briefest moment, he was floating by himself, but before he could begin to flail around out of fear, you grabbed his arm, taking him along beside you as you swam to the shallow end where Yayoi was waiting.
As soon as he was able to stand, Tabito sprinted out of the pool, splashing up the stairs, shivering as he made a beeline for where his towel was waiting. You and Yayoi watched as he flopped into one of the chairs, curling up and draping the towel over his shoulders.
“Well, I guess he spent more time in the water than I expected,” Yayoi allowed. “That was a surprise.”
You exhaled, rolling your shoulders, which had tightened from the burden you had carried along the length of the pool. “He’s braver than you give him credit for.”
“Maybe around you,” Yayoi said. “I think he just wants to impress you, since you’re older and cooler.”
“It could be,” you said. “Though I doubt it. He’s known me for too long to think of me as worthy of impressing. It’s probably just because I’m nicer to him than you.”
“That’s just because you don’t see him every day. Trust me, if you did, you’d be even meaner than me. I’m told I’m quite patient,” she said. You flicked water at her.
“Our resident saint, Yayoi Karasu,” you said. She flicked water back at you with a mock-scowl.
“Oh, shut up,” she said, and then it was an all out war as the two of you endeavored to soak the other, forgetting about anything more important than the newfound game and the happiness it brought you.
When it finally came time for Tabito to graduate elementary school, there was a sort of melancholy in the air, though by all rights it should’ve been an exciting time. You had been asked to come to the ceremony by Yayoi, though she had confessed that it had been her brother who had actually wanted you there but was too shy to ask directly, and almost as soon as you sat down, you were aware of that feeling settled over all of the Karasus, even Tabito himself, though he was so far away on the stage.
Perhaps for their parents and grandmother, it was because their youngest was at this milestone. Never again would they have a child in elementary school; now, both of the siblings were older, nearer to adulthood than anything, but you doubted that that fact was congruent with the images they held of them as helpless infants. Even for you, it was peculiar to see Tabito standing on that stage when you still at times thought of him as that four year old boy who played with trains, so you assumed the effect was tenfold for his parents and grandmother, who had raised him since birth.
You weren’t so sure that it was the same for Yayoi, who had a different sort of glumness about her. She was sad for another reason, and as the principal droned on about the class’s achievements, you leaned over to whisper in her ear.
“What’s got you down?” you said.
“I’m not down,” she muttered. She would’ve fooled any other person, but you were not any other person, so you only elbowed her in the side.
“Yayoi,” you said under your breath in a sing-song voice. “Are you sad about Tabito graduating?”
“Why would I be sad about that?” she said.
“You tell me,” you said.
“It’s just hard to wrap my head around,” she said. “I always complain about him following me around and bothering me, but it’s just hitting me now that he probably won’t do that very much anymore. He’s going to go to a different middle school and make friends and want nothing to do with me.”
“I don’t think he’d do that,” you reassured her. “He’ll be less annoying about it, but he won’t just abandon you, at least not before you do the same to him. He’s bad at letting go of things unless you force him to.”
“I’d never abandon him,” she said.
“It’s not that you’d abandon him, but just think about it. In four years we’ll be headed to university, and he’ll still be in high school. Isn’t that kind of like you leaving him first?” you said.
“I don’t want to think about that,” she said after a minute.
“I get it,” you said. “It’s weird for me as well. Not him, but what if you and I don’t go to the same high school or university? What will I do without you?”
The changing of the seasons was what weighed on Yayoi, and consequently, on you. Tabito’s graduation was a reminder that the years did not stop for anyone, that you were all growing older with every passing day, and that one day things would not be so simple, the way they were right now. Of course, that day was far away, but then again, there had been a time when the day that Tabito left primary school, too, had been far away, and yet here you were, arriving upon it so soon.
The end of the ceremony was familiar to you, but this time you were on the opposite side, standing amongst the parents as they waited for their children to join them. You stood on your tiptoes, peering over Mr. Karasu’s shoulder in an attempt to spot Tabito when he came out. There wasn’t anyone else in his class who you knew; you had gone solely for him, and so it was only he who you searched for, counting the heads until he appeared.
He was one of the last ones to come out, talking to a few of his friends, though they all peeled off in different directions as they grew closer to you. Finally, by the time he reached the area where you, his parents, grandmother, and Yayoi were waiting, he was by himself, his hands shoved in his pockets as he braced himself for your reactions.
“Come here, Tabito,” his grandmother said, embracing him as tightly as she could given her frail body. “You’ve worked so hard, my grandson. You deserve everything good that’s bound to come your way.”
“Thank you, grandmother,” he said. There was this one thing about him — no matter how he acted around his peers, no one could ever say that he disrespected his elders, which was not always the case with those his age.
“How do you feel? You’re officially a middle schooler now!” Mr. Karasu said once his grandmother had let him go.
“Good,” he said. He was obviously squirmy and embarrassed at everyone’s attention being focused on him, so his mother only kissed him atop the head before releasing him to speak with you and Yayoi.
“Good going, Tabito,” Yayoi said, offering him her hand. He shook it firmly, much more at ease now that it was just the three of you. It was so typical as to be normal, despite the less-than-ordinary circumstances of the meeting, so it was impossible for any of you to be awkward.
“Thanks, Yayoi,” he said. She scoffed, making a big show of wiping her hand against her pants, which Tabito only rolled his eyes at.
“Whatever. Don’t forget that I’m going to a better junior high school than you, okay?” she said.
“It’s not my fault that your school’s soccer club sucks!” he said. “I’d have gone there if I could’ve.”
“More like you couldn’t get in,” she said. “Because you’re super stupid. I can’t believe you even managed to graduate in the first place. In fact, I only even congratulated you because I was so surprised by that fact.”
“Stupid? You’re the stupid one!” Tabito said.
“Nuh-uh, you didn’t even understand long division until Y/N explained it to you!” Yayoi said.
“That’s the only thing I was ever confused by, and I understood it as soon as she told me how to!” he said.
“Well, that just means Y/N’s a good teacher. It has nothing to do with how smart you are,” she said. You laughed.
“To be sure, I’m a good teacher, but that doesn’t mean he’s stupid. It’s his graduation, so we should be nice to him for today, don’t you think, Yayoi?” you said. She pouted.
“Just for today, I guess,” she said. “Fine. You’re not that stupid, Tabito.”
“You’re not that stupid, either,” he said. Coming from them, this was actually a stunning declaration of fraternal love, and you were taken aback that you had inspired it. However, upon further consideration, you supposed everyone was feeling sentimental by that point, so it wasn’t too hard to tease out.
“How far is your new school?” you asked him in an attempt to change the subject.
“Pretty far,” he said. “They have the best soccer club in the area, though, so it only makes sense for me to go there.”
“Are you going to have to try out?” you said.
“Of course. It’s not a guarantee I’ll get to play at all, especially in my first year, but just the fact that the chance is there is enough,” he said.
“That’s intense,” you said. You had stayed with the art club all throughout middle school, and though it was conducted with the same stringency as the sports clubs, there wasn’t as much of a competitive aspect to it. Anyone who wanted to join was allowed to, as long as they abided by the rules and regulations of the club, and such concepts as ‘trying-out’ were foreign to you outside of the stories Yayoi told you about her misadventures with badminton.
“It’s how it is in all sports clubs,” he said.
“True,” Yayoi said. “Remember my first year in the badminton club? It’ll be like that, only to a greater extent, since his school is known for soccer, so the club will be way more popular.”
“I don’t know how you guys do it. I could never; having to try out and possibly being denied the chance to do something I love would stress me out way too much,” you said. “But hey, Tabito, when you do get in — because I’m sure you will — invite us to your games so we can cheer you on, alright?”
“You’d really want to watch me?” he said.
“Why not?” you said. “I’m sure it’d be fun.”
“Eh,” Yayoi said. “Don’t be too sure. The games are kinda boring, to tell you the truth.”
“Nobody said you had to come!” Tabito said, crossing his arms and glaring at her.
“It’s not like I’d leave Y/N to suffer on her own just because she wants to be a supportive older-sister-figure. Obviously, I’d go,” she said.
“Aw, you’re the best, Yayoi,” you said.
“I try,” she said.
“Although, it’s kind of crazy that you’d go to support me but not him, when he’s the one actually related to you,” you pointed out.
“That’s because I like you more,” she said. “Not too crazy.”
“What happened to being nice to him on his graduation day?” you reminded her.
“Sorry,” she said automatically. “It had to be said, though.”
“Whatever,” Tabito said. “I don’t care if you’re there or not.”
“Wow, I see how it is,” she said.
“Just keep me posted,” you said. “As long as I’m not busy, I’ll go for sure.”
“I’ll tell you the moment I make the team. You’ll be the first person to know,” he said.
“Not even our parents?” Yayoi said.
“Obviously I wasn’t counting them!”
Either he was more talented than he let on, or more determined than the rest of his classmates, but regardless, mere months after the next school year began, you picked up a phone call that came from Yayoi’s phone but was made by another person entirely.
“Hello?” you said.
“Hello, Y/N? It’s Tabito. I’m using Yayoi’s phone to call you because I don’t have one of my own,” he said.
“Hi, Tabito. What’s up?” you said, holding the phone between your ear and shoulder as you filled out a worksheet for your science class.
“I made it onto the soccer team,” he said. The tone was casual, but there was energy brimming behind it, so you knew he was likely rocking back and forth on his heels in excitement.
“No way! As just a first year?” you said.
“Yeah, I’m the youngest member of the team. The others are all second and third years,” he said.
“That’s amazing! I knew you could do it,” you said.
“I was pretty nervous, but I just did the best I could at tryouts, and I guess they thought I fit in well with the team,” he said.
“Of course you do,” you said.
“So,” he said. “Our first game is in two weeks. On Saturday. Are you busy that day?”
“I don’t think so. I’m usually free on Saturdays, especially if I’m good about doing my homework on time,” you said.
“Will you come?” he said, spitting it out like it was something boiling and acidic on his tongue.
“To your game? Yeah, I already promised I would, didn’t I? Just send me the address and I’ll be there,” you said.
“Okay,” he said.
“Okay,” you said. “See you later. And seriously, you should be proud of yourself. Getting into the club at your age is awesome.”
“Thanks,” he said. “I’ll have Yayoi send you the address so you can meet her there. Um, but only if you want to.”
“I do want to,” you assured him. “Promise. Bye, Tabito.”
The day of the game was brisk and windy, almost like winter but not quite as punishing — the kind of weather where you could still just as easily grow too hot as too cold. All of the trees lining the street were bursting with colors other than the typical viridian, their leaves glimmering in the afternoon sunlight like ruby-studded crowns of gold which cascaded through the air with every passing breeze. There was a hint of loneliness in the piles of browning foliage littering the sidewalk, which meant that, in short, it was Tabito’s favorite kind of day. You hoped that it was a good omen for his first game.
Yayoi was waiting for you by the bottom of the bleachers, playing with the frayed ends of the pale blue scarf wrapped around her neck. She was wearing a cable-knit sweater, a pair of jeans that were loose around her ankles, and once-white shoes which had long ago been ruined by purple ink and too much free time.
“Sorry I’m late,” you said. She glanced up at you and then smiled slightly in greeting.
“No worries, you’re not late at all. I just came early because I walked with Tabito and he had to be here in time to warm up,” she said.
“If you get here so early every time, then I can see why you get bored of watching his games,” you said.
“I guess maybe that’s on me,” she allowed. “Where do you want to sit? If we’re closer to the field, we can see better, but there’s a greater chance we’ll get hit by a stray ball.”
“How about three rows back? That should be enough of a buffer that we don’t get hurt, but we’ll be able to see everything that happens,” you said.
“Sounds like a plan,” she said.
The metal benches were icy when you first sat on them, and you pulled your cardigan tighter around you to ward away the chill which seeped through your entire body from the point of contact. Yayoi, who was nearly as observant as her brother, offered you her scarf when she noticed, but you shook your head in a silent rejection.
The two of you talked about random, mindless things while you waited for the game to begin — how your classes were going, the latest gossip at your school, which high schools you were planning to apply for, and other such topics. They were the same subjects you went over every time you hung out, and for a moment you forgot that you had another purpose for meeting beyond just enjoying one another’s company.
Then the referee blew the whistle, effectively cutting off your conversation and bringing the impending game back to your collective attention. The gathered spectators, who were mostly parents and other students that attended Tabito’s junior high school, broke into applause as the teams took the field for the kickoff. You did the same, though both you and Yayoi made sure to applaud extra hard when Tabito jogged up with the others.
“Do you know what position he plays?” you said.
“Back in elementary school, he was the striker, but I doubt they’d give that role to a first year,” she said. “He’ll have to work up to it, I’m sure. He’s probably in the midfield for now.”
“I don’t really know what that means,” you admittedly sheepishly.
“I guess you could think of midfielders as the in-between men? Before, he was on pure offense, so his job was to stay up and score whenever possible, and then of course there’s players who prefer to be on defense, which means they aim to stop the opposite team from making goals. Midfielders have to be fluid, though, since they’re responsible for the middle portion of the field — ah, hence the name. Depending on who has the ball, they have to either go on offense or stay back on defense, which means they need to be equally as skilled at both,” she said.
“But then why would they put an inexperienced player in such a spot?” you said.
“It’s a pretty forgiving position, surprisingly. If you mess up as a midfielder, you have a buffer of offensive and defensive players on either side of you, so it’s likely that someone will be able to recover for the error, but if you’re up on top at offense or near the goal on defense, then there’s no one beyond you, so mistakes are more costly,” she explained.
“I get it now,” you said. “Sorry if that was a dumb thing to be asking so many questions about.”
“Not at all,” she said. “It can be confusing, especially when you don’t know much about the game. You should ask Tabito to explain everything to you if you plan on becoming a soccer fan; he can go on and on about it. My knowledge is pretty surface level and also entirely dependent on whatever he’s told me.”
“I’ll keep that in mind,” you said.
“Ooh, look, they’re starting!” Yayoi said, pointing at the field, where indeed the game had exploded into action, players darting back and forth, shoving one another aside as they reached for the ball. As she had predicted, Tabito stayed towards the middle of the field, surveying the players fighting over the ball, and though he wasn’t anywhere near the thick of things, you found yourself far more interested in him than the others.
What did he see when he was on the field? It was something you’d never really get to understand. What was it like in the heat of a match, where every single movement was the difference between win or lose — in essence, between life or death? You wondered what kind of person he became when he played soccer, if it was the sort of experience that changed one’s character or if you were just ascribing fantastical aspects to it because you couldn’t live through it yourself.
The game went on at a breakneck speed, and frequently, by the time you asked Yayoi what was happening, the play had ended and a new strategy had already been implemented. It was difficult to keep up with but no less exciting for your lack of comprehension, and at least it was easy to keep track of the score, for the goals needed no explanation.
By the time that the second half was all but over, the score was tied. You thought about asking Yayoi what’d happen if it ended like that, but based on the way she was leaning forward in her seat and biting her nails, you doubted it was anything good.
Entirely by chance or perhaps by choice, the ball rolled to a stop at Tabito’s feet. For the entire game, he had been flitting around the action, never cutting in despite how he must’ve ached to, and now he was being given a chance to prove himself, a chance to change the course of the match entirely. Your heart pounded, though nowhere near as fiercely as his own must’ve, and somehow your hand sought out Yayoi’s, the racing pulse in your wrist crushing against hers, which was equally as quick.
In the moment that the side of Tabito’s foot brushed against the ball, there was a rebirth which occurred. He came alive in an instant, like a hawk which had finally swooped upon its prey, talons digging into a tender neck and rending through the soft flesh, wings spreading in an ominous shadow over the unassuming creature that he was bound to devour.
The other team did not stand a chance. He cut through them in a way that almost felt mocking, slamming his hands against their chests to push them away, keeping them at an arm’s length as he flew past, his eyes constantly scanning the area around him, trusting his feet to take care of the ball, which stayed by him with the loyalty of a hound. It was a terrible and yet beautiful thing to take in, the cruelty of his play-style; you could not reconcile it with the sweet boy you knew, yet neither could you tear your eyes away from that sly, vicious force as it darkened the field.
His goal was punctuated with the whistle of the game’s end. For a moment, he stood there alone, staring at the ball rolling out of the net, sending up sprays of turf when it bounced against the ground, and then he was tackled by his teammates, all of whom were shouting praises as they piled atop him.
“I can’t believe he scored the winning goal!” Yayoi said, tugging you to your feet. “Come on, let’s go congratulate him!”
“Are we allowed to?” you said.
“Mm, not if this was an actual game, but considering it was just a practice match between two middle schools, no one will care,” she said, vaulting over the short fence separating the field from the seating area and helping you do the same.
“If you say so,” you said.
All of the players were congregated by their coach, who was delivering an inspirational speech about their teamwork and how wonderful they were, so you and Yayoi hung back until they were dismissed. After that, you snuck up on Tabito, who was taking off his cleats, and Yayoi thumped him on the back.
“Boo!” she said. He squealed, and it was a high-pitched, girlish sound which had Yayoi cackling with laughter as she squished his cheeks together in one hand.
“Yayoi!” he said, though his voice was muffled, his mouth resembling a fish’s. “Let go of me!”
“I can’t bear to! My baby brother, the hero of the match,” Yayoi said. “It’s unbelievable. As exciting as if I was the one to score the winning goal.”
“Yeah, but you weren’t,” he said, using his shoulder to get her off of him so he could tie the laces of his sneakers.
“Wow, way to take away from my fun,” she said. “And here I was, trying to be proud of you.”
“Whatever,” he said. “What did you think, Y/N?”
Before you could answer, two of Tabito’s older teammates, one of whom was wearing a captain’s armband, appeared behind him. They were probably your age, towering over little Tabito, with handsome faces and the beginnings of sleek muscles swelling in their arms and legs.
“Hi,” the captain said to you. “You’re super pretty.”
You had never been approached so boldly, and certainly not by anyone so good-looking. Your cheeks warmed, and you fought back a smile.
“Hi,” you said. “Thanks. You played really well.”
You couldn’t quite remember how he had played, actually, for you had spent most of the game looking at Tabito, but you assumed it wouldn’t hurt for you to compliment him back, and mentioning the game was a safe enough way to do so. He seemed to appreciate it, laughing loudly, though you hadn’t said anything particularly funny.
“I’m glad you thought so!” he said. “We tried out a new strategy, and we weren’t sure it’d work, but thanks to Tabito here, it ended up for the best.”
“That’s great,” you said, directing your words to both of them, though the other teammate, who seemed to be less outgoing than his captain, was too busy staring at Yayoi to notice.
“How d’you know this shrimp, anyways?” the captain said, throwing an arm around the disgruntled Tabito’s shoulders. Tabito’s expression, which had already soured with the captain’s arrival, only warped more at the friendly display, his lip curling like he had tasted spoiled milk.
“He’s my little brother, and she’s my best friend,” Yayoi offered, tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear.
“We came to support him at his first game!” you said. “He’s been super excited about getting the chance to play, so there was no way we couldn’t come.”
“As far as first years go, he’s definitely one of the best. I’m confident he’ll be taking my spot once he’s old enough for it,” the captain said. “I can’t name a single kid his age who’s as talented or hardworking.”
“He gets it from his older sister,” Yayoi joked. The captain grinned at her.
“I’m sure he does,” he said. “Look, I’m going to be plain with you: my friend and I were wondering if we could get your numbers and maybe—”
“We have to go now,” Tabito said, cutting off the captain, who gave him a surprised look. Slinging his bag over his shoulder, he crossed his arms at you and Yayoi. “My mom will get mad at us if we’re late.”
“No, she won’t,” Yayoi said, furrowing her brow. “Since when has she cared about how late we are getting home?”
“Yes, she will!” he insisted. “She told me before we left that we have to be back before sunset or else we’ll be in big trouble.”
The captain raised his hands in the air. “No worries. Come to another game and we can catch up then, alright? There’s no point in risking getting in trouble.”
“Sure, that sounds cool,” you said.
“Nice meeting you,” he said.
“Yeah, nice meeting you,” the other teammate echoed, speaking for the first time, his face immediately turning bright red when Yayoi glanced at him.
“See you around,” she said. You thought that you heard the boy squeak, but you couldn’t quite tell. “Alright, Tabito, let’s go, then. Since apparently we’ll be in such big trouble if we’re not on time. Whatever that means.”
She didn’t roll her eyes, but it was implied in the rise and fall of her voice. Tabito ignored her, trotting off towards the exit, forcing you both to follow after him without further delay.
Once you were all on the road towards the Karasu household, Yayoi pulled out her phone, holding it out to her younger brother threateningly.
“I’m going to call mom, and if it turns out you were lying, I’m — I’m — I’m going to be really upset! You made us miss out on a chance to get dates, so if you were just making stuff up, then I’ll kill you for sure!” she said, speeding ahead of you so she could talk uninterrupted. Tabito shifted closer to you, a small frown on his face, not bothering to respond to Yayoi’s threat. You waited for him to say something; he confided in you often, expressing things to you which he dared not discuss with his sister, and you did not doubt that he would take advantage of the moment of solitude to speak his mind to you.
“You didn’t tell me,” he said after a moment of walking at your side.
“Tell you what?” you said.
“What you thought,” he said. “You told the captain he played well, but what about me?”
“I assumed it would be a given,” you said. “Of course, naturally I thought you were wonderful, Tabito. You were the best player out there.”
“Better than the captain?” he said. You beckoned him closer, cupping your hands around his ear.
“Can I tell you a secret?” you whispered. He nodded eagerly. “I don’t really know how the captain played. I just said that he was good to be nice to him, as he was nice to me, but the truth is that even when you didn’t have the ball, I couldn’t help but watch you the entire time.”
“Really?” he said.
“Really,” you said, nodding at him quite seriously. “I came to support you, didn’t I? Why would I bother with the other players?”
Any traces of his earlier vexation vanished in an instant. As you had suspected, he had been upset that you and Yayoi had ignored him in favor of the charming older players when he had been the one to invite you in the first place. Thankfully, he was easy to read and easier to placate, and anyways he never held grudges for very long, so he quickly cheered as if he had never been angry at all.
“Y/N, can I ask you one more thing before Yayoi comes back?” he said, looking over at his sister, who was speaking quite furiously to who you could only imagine was their mother.
“You can always ask me anything,” you said. “Go ahead.”
“Your phone number,” he said.
“What about it?” you said, puzzled. He avoided your eyes, kicking apart a pile of leaves and gazing at them as they plumed into the air.
“I want it,” he said. You gave him an amused look.
“You don’t even have a phone, Tabito. What would you do with my number?” you said.
“I’ll remember it,” he said, picking up a leaf and tearing it apart into many small pieces.
“Is that so?” you said. It was a ridiculous request, and you doubted he’d be able to follow through on that kind of promise, but you figured there was no harm in telling him. So you listed off the digits of your phone number, slowly and carefully, as he nodded along and told you he really would never forget them.
“Tabito!” Yayoi shrieked, sprinting towards you two at full pace. Tabito yelped and hid behind you as his sister, who was hardly ever so intimidating, came closer and closer, her countenance dark and a malevolent aura rolling off of her in waves. “Explain yourself, punk! Why’d mom tell me she said nothing like the crap you were spouting earlier? What’s the big idea, huh?”
“Oh, it’s alright, Yayoi,” you said. “I’m sure it was weird for him to watch his own teammates flirting with his older sister and her friend. That has to be some kind of murky territory or something. What if it didn’t work out and then they bullied him because of that? I don’t blame him for trying to get out of the situation.”
She huffed. “You’re lucky Y/N’s here. One day she won’t be there to defend you, and then you’ll really be sorry!”
Tabito stood on his tiptoes to peek over your shoulder and stuck his tongue out at her. Scowling, she returned the gesture in kind, blowing a raspberry at him before grabbing your hand and yanking you away with her.
“Come on,” she said. “Let’s leave this loser to walk by himself.”
You chuckled and freed your hand from her grasp, which was a Herculean feat given that she had a grip made of iron, and then you looped your arm through her own.
“Alright, Yayoi,” you said. “Let’s do that.”
Later that night, as you wrapped up the last of your homework for the weekend, your cell phone lit up with an incoming call. Setting down your pencil, you picked up the phone and saw it was from the Karasus’ home phone — which was odd, because ever since Yayoi had gotten a cellphone of her own, she had called you from that, so it had been quite some time since you had seen that particular contact pop up.
“Hi, Yayoi,” you said. “Did your phone die or something?”
There was a pause. Then: “This isn’t Yayoi. It’s Tabito. I told you I’d remember your number.”
“Tabito?” you said. “Well, good job with that.”
“I wrote it down as soon as I got home,” he said. “Once I get my own phone, I’ll make you my first contact.”
“Me? Not your parents or Yayoi? Or one of your other friends from school?” you said, snickering. “Why is that?”
“I don’t know,” he said. “But I want it to be you.”
“I appreciate it,” you said. Maybe in some way, your friendship with Yayoi had transferred to him; after all, you had been the first number she inputted once she got a new phone, and you were also the first person she gave her personal number to, so maybe that kind of tradition had stayed with him and, in a typical sibling manner, became something he wanted to replicate. “You do that, then. And you can text me directly when you have games so I can come to them.”
“Actually, I also wanted to tell you that you don’t have to watch any more games where I’m not doing anything. When I’m in high school and I’m the captain of a really good team, then you can come,” he said.
“I don’t mind if you’re not doing much. The game today was fun. I got to hang out with Yayoi and meet your teammates,” you said.
“I don’t want you there anymore, so don’t come!” he said.
“Goodness. I won’t, then,” you said. “But that means you really have to work hard, because even if you invite me, I’ll only attend if you’re the captain of the team.”
“Good,” he said. “I’ll be a way better captain than the one I have right now.”
“Sure,” you said.
“Okay,” he said. “Bye, Y/N.”
“Bye,” you said, hanging up, finding a great humor in his competitive mindset, which even reared its head against his own captain, who he was meant to respect above all else.
Somehow, by chance or by fate, both you and Yayoi had the same top high school, and furthermore, you both received offers of admission despite how selective it was. The only other person from your middle school who was accepted was Aoyama, which you only knew because he told you one day during art club.
Both his artistic skills and his appearance had improved markedly since the two of you had first met; though he had never managed to master calligraphy or watercolor painting, he had discovered a talent for making scenes come alive with the use of a simple pencil. It was admirable, that with solely shades of gray he was able elicit images of color, and as he had grown older, he had also mellowed into someone you did not mind speaking to, so when you discovered that he was going to high school with you and Yayoi, you were surprised to find that you were actually a little happy about that fact.
Despite his obvious aptitude for sports — he was tall and sturdily built, with long limbs and a wide torso — he had denied every athletic club which attempted to recruit him, staying loyal to the art club despite how hard he had to work at keeping up with the rest of you. And because you and he had been in the same club for years upon years and the same school for longer, you supposed that it was inevitable for some kind of relationship to blossom between the two of you, which was why it was all but a foregone conclusion when he asked you out, the winter of your first year of high school.
It wasn’t the most romantic proposal. In fact, it was rushed and harried and fumbling, altogether messy and unplanned, but endearing in a way. You had been walking home from an art club meeting when you passed by the park where he had had a birthday party, so many years ago, and then he was pulling you over to the slides and sitting you down at the foot of one. You were motionless as he paced back and forth, trying to muster up the courage and the words to say to you, and then finally he just spat it out, all in a jumble. Will you go out with me?
You saw no reason to say no, so you said yes. He pressed a kiss to your cheek, and his lips were cold like the weather, but you did not complain, because he could not help it. And then he sprinted off and left you sitting there, at the edge of the red plastic slide in that desolate playground, the wind pushing the empty swings the way you had once pushed Tabito.
Aoyama was a fine boyfriend, or at least you thought he was; you had no experience with any others, so of course you could not say for certain, but in your opinion, he did as well of a job as he could be expected to. He held your hand when you walked together and took you on dates and kissed you in private — never in public, though, because you hated the idea, even if he would’ve liked to very much.
“I don’t get what your problem is,” you said, pressing a button on your controller to send a red shell flying. It connected with Yayoi’s character, and your own avatar, Princess Daisy, pumped her fist in celebration as you shot past the dismayed Rosalina.
“Don’t have one,” she said, shaking her remote in a futile effort to reawaken Rosalina. The character remained stunned for a second more before rejoining the race.
“Every time I bring up Aoyama, you stop talking and get all standoffish,” you said. “You obviously do have a problem. Is it because I keep talking about my boyfriend? I’m sorry if I’ve been doing that. I don’t want to be one of those people.”
“You don’t talk about him a ton,” she said, using a power up to speed through a shortcut, ramming your character out of the way to snag first place at the last minute.
“Okay, but something about him annoys you. What is it? I can’t fix a problem if I don’t even know it exists,” you said.
There was a set of thudding footsteps, and then Tabito, freshly showered from a game, peeked his head into the living room, batting his eyelashes at you in an attempt to seem sweet and innocent.
“Are you guys playing Mario Kart?” he said.
“What’s it to you?” Yayoi said.
“I want to, too,” he said. “Can I?”
“We were kind of talking about something,” you said. You weren’t sure if Yayoi would discuss the subject in front of her little brother, but it had been bothering you for long enough that you wanted to get things out in the open once and for all.
“It’s fine,” Yayoi said. “You can play with us. Just don’t be a pain.”
This was an absolute role reversal, and Tabito must’ve picked up on that, but he did not mention it, only plodding over to the TV and connecting his own set of controllers before settling on the floor in front of you, leaning back on your legs instead of attempting to squish between his sister and the armrest of the small couch.
“Are you seriously going to be Waluigi again?” you asked him with some disdain, wrinkling your nose as he selected his typical character.
“He’s my favorite,” he said.
“Gross,” you said. “But back to the original topic, Yayoi, don’t think you’re getting out of things just because Tabito’s here. You still have to explain what’s up.”
“Did something happen?” Tabito said as you selected a cup at random and the first race began.
“No,” Yayoi said.
“Yes,” you said, at exactly the same time.
“…Okay, then,” Tabito said.
“It’s about Aoyama,” Yayoi said. “Her boyfriend.”
“Oh,” he said.
“It feels like Yayoi has some issues with him, but she won’t tell me what those issues are, exactly,” you said.
“Is he a bad boyfriend?” Tabito said.
“I don’t think so,” you said. “No, he’s perfectly alright.”
“Look, I don’t have anything against Aoyama. I liked him, all of the way back in first grade, so obviously I don’t have a problem with him,” she said.
“Is that it?” you said. “I didn’t even realize you had a crush on him at all.”
“No, why would I care about a crush from when I was so young? To be honest, I just don’t think he deserves you,” she said.
“Why not?” you said.
“That’s my duty as your best friend,” she said. “To me, you’re the most amazing person ever, so how could someone like Aoyama ever be worthy of dating you? Besides, it doesn’t seem like you like him very much.”
“What are you talking about? Obviously, I like him, or I wouldn’t be going out with him,” you said.
“You should break up with him if you don’t like him,” Tabito suggested.
“I do like him, and I’m not breaking up with him,” you said. “Yayoi, why would you say something like that?”
“Dunno,” she said. “Forget about it. Maybe I was just seeing things. If you say that you like him, then you definitely do.”
“Right,” you said.
“What’s so great about him, anyways?” Tabito said, shifting so that he could be more comfortable. “For you to want to date him. Why do you like him? Does he even do anything of note?”
You snorted. “Not everyone’s a soccer ace like you, Tabito. Aoyama could’ve been an athlete, but he’s stayed in the art club with me since elementary school. That’s a long time; it would’ve been impossible for me not to grow fond of him over the years, and by the time he worked up the nerve to ask me out officially, I suppose I was fond enough to say yes.”
“That’s stupid,” Tabito said. For emphasis, he released a blue shell, which hit you right before you crossed the finish line. “Anyone could join the art club, and you’ve known other people longer than you’ve known him. That’s not enough of a reason to date somebody.”
“Rude,” you said, kneeing him in the head playfully, for you had come in fourth due to his intervention. “You know, you don’t really need a reason to date someone. You can date them just because. Maybe it’s true that hanging out with you two is more fun than being with Aoyama, but isn’t it normal to get along better with your friends? And especially when the relationship is so fresh. We’re still getting to know one another right now.”
“That’s fair,” Yayoi said. “Don’t expect me to be outright hospitable with him or anything, but for your sake, I’ll be polite. As long as he knows that I’ll make sure he regrets hurting you, if ever he does.”
“I’ll pass the message along,” you said.
“And you have to like me — us more,” Tabito added. “You’ve known us longer, so you have to like us better.”
“I’ll always like you better,” you said, reaching down to pinch his cheek. Already, his face was losing that round quality from his youth; you expected it’d be entirely gone soon, and you mourned the imminent loss of his doll-like appearance, vowing to adore it for as long as it remained.
Surprisingly, he did not slap your hand away. He only hummed in pleased agreement, and that was that. The conversation was finished, and it was the last any of you spoke about the matter for quite some time.
High school flew by faster than you had anticipated, certainly far faster than middle school had, though they were the exact same length. You divided your time between your club activities, studying for exams, hanging out with Yayoi as well as your other friends, and going on dates with Aoyama, so you hardly had a moment in which you could be bored. You almost missed the feeling of lethargy and inertia you had at least experienced once or twice in junior high, but yet you could not bear to give any of those aspects of your life up, so you managed the demanding schedule as best as you could and somehow made it work.
As he had attended a different middle school than you and Yayoi, so, too, did Tabito attend a separate high school. He chose it because their soccer club was well-known, but when he was in his first year, he was scouted to join the youth team of the prestigious J1 League football club Bambi Osaka, so it ended up mattering little. When he had reached such a point, why would he concern himself with school soccer clubs? There was no higher peak that he could reach with them than the one he already had achieved, especially not at his age.
It was rare for someone so young to consistently give such excellent performances. After all, he had been chosen as a starter for his junior high team as only a first year, albeit as a midfielder instead of his preferred position as a striker, and now, at the beginning of his high school career, he had already been selected to play for Bambi Osaka. Even Yayoi had to admit that her little brother had something to him — she claimed it to be an intrinsic talent, for that meant she had a chance at inheriting it as well, but Tabito was far more modest than she and always countered these declarations, arguing that it was nothing more than constant practice.
“Don’t tell anyone this, but I’m not that good,” he told you one day, when you were watching one of Yayoi’s badminton matches together. You were sitting on his black camping chair; he had offered to you and sat on the ground instead of making you do so, though you had never complained about it.
“There’s no way you’re not,” you said. “Ask anyone, and they’ll agree with me.”
“It’s true,” he said, shrugging like it was a fact he had accepted long ago and which consequently did not bother him anymore. “Some people are handed everything, but I’m not like that. I’m not a prodigy in any sense of the word. It’s easy to seem talented when you only pick on a person’s weak spots.”
You rested your hand on his shoulder. He was taller now, and growing more by the day, so you no longer had to lean down very far to do so, though he was on the ground and you were not. Exhaling through his nose, he bent his neck so his cheek could rest on your fingers, which were perpetually cold and must’ve felt nice in the summery heat of the midafternoon.
“If you seem like you’re talented, then you really must be,” you said. “I don’t think faking things like that is as simple as you believe it to be.”
“It’s simpler than you think,” he said. “Anyways, please don’t bring it up again. I just wanted one person to know the truth of who I am.”
“And it had to be me?” you said. You couldn’t see him smile, but you felt his cheeks grow fuller as his mouth curved into the wry smirk he donned more often than not nowadays.
“Of course, it had to be you,” he affirmed. “Who else would it be?”
Who, indeed? In some ways, you were as close with her little brother as you were with Yayoi herself, though it was a different kind of relationship there. As an only child, you supposed that all-consuming affection must’ve been what one felt for a younger sibling, so you put it down to that. After all, you had known Tabito for long enough that he could probably be considered your brother as well as Yayoi’s, so what else would it be? And the way he treated you was how he would’ve treated Yayoi if she were gentler with him, so although it was definitely preferential, you never saw anything wrong with it nor felt any need to correct his loving behavior.
The end of entrance exams, which was the culmination of the many months of hellish work that you had all put in, came with bittersweet news. For the first time, you, Yayoi, and Aoyama would split ways, each of you accepted to different universities. Those two, whose steady presences at your side you took all but for granted, had paths which diverged from yours, and you wondered if ever they would converge again.
Your path took you to Tokyo, to the exact university that your parents had met at. They wept when they found out, for though they loved where they were now, their hearts still beat for the bustling city where they had spent so much of their lives.
Your only consolation was that Yayoi, too, was going to the capital city. She would attend a different school, and thus would live in a different part of the megalopolis than you would, so the distance between you would not be small, exactly, but at least it was manageable. At least your paths would not be so separate. The same could not be said for Aoyama, who was going to Kyoto for university. You would be hours apart, and as the date of your graduation grew ever nearer, this took a toll on your relationship.
The ceremony itself was beautiful, exactly the kind of celebration that was shown in movies. The choir sang your school’s anthem and the president of the school board personally handed you each your diplomas; everyone was dressed in their best clothes, and the click-clack of heels against wood echoed around the hall as students and parents alike bustled about, congratulating one another and wiping away tears at another milestone crossed.
As always, as ever, your parents were sitting with the Karasus. You knew because you sought them out when it was your turn to receive your diploma. At first, they were impossible to find in the crowd, but then, like a miracle, you saw Tabito in the back, towards the left entrance, his pensive expression vanishing the moment he realized you were looking at him. Just as he had when you had graduated elementary school, he grinned at you, and then he waved, but unlike back then, he wasn’t at all shy about it. Also unlike then, you beamed at him with no care for propriety, cameras flashing in your eyes as you clutched your diploma in front of you with one hand and used the other to wave enthusiastically back.
“What a sweet photo,” your father said when all of you rendezvoused after the official ceremony, showing you his phone. The picture was of you on stage, your face radiant with delight, your arm raised mid-wave, the gold lettering on your diploma legible thanks to the power of the zoom on his camera. “You’re so beautiful, dear. I can’t believe you’re so grown up already.”
“She’ll always be our baby,” your mother said, not even attempting to disguise the tears wetting the shadows under her eyes.
“Can we get a picture with our two graduates?” Mrs. Karasu said.
“That’s a great idea,” your father said. “It’s so special that the two of you started school together, and now you’ve graduated side by side.”
“It only happens in the movies,” Mr. Karasu said, taking a pack of tissues out of his pocket and blowing his nose with a great honk. “And yet we have an example right here in front of us. Go on, girls, get together.”
You and Yayoi did not need to be told twice, pressing your shoulders together, so close that they rose and fell in tandem. You fancied that if one was to listen to your heartbeats at that moment, they would’ve been keeping the same rhythm, for you had lived more of your lives together than not, and so even your most basic systems were familiar with one another.
“How about one of Yayoi and Tabito?” Mr. Karasu said. “Let the L/Ns take a couple with Y/N, too.”
Your parents took turns posing with you and taking photos before your father flagged down a random classmate of yours, entreating the confused boy to take a picture of the three of you together. You could already envision exactly where they were going to hang that particular shot — in the living room, framed by something gaudy and likely near the vase of false, ever-blooming flowers your mother kept on one of the tables.
The Karasus were still taking family photos, for there were quite a few more of them than there were of you, so you decided to take the moment to look for Aoyama, who had been separated from you and Yayoi in the rush of people leaving the ceremony hall. It would be nice to take a picture or two with him, too, after all.
It was not hard to find him, not given how tall he was — in the crowd, there were few who were taller, and of those few, only the lanky Tabito was one you recognized. His mother greeted you exuberantly; she had always loved you, perhaps even more than her son did, and she immediately pushed the two of you together so that she could take a million photographs which she promised she would send to you at the earliest possible convenience.
“Do you ever think that this might be the last time we’re like this?” Aoyama said, his hand resting on your hip, a politician’s grin on his square face. You hummed in agreement.
“It is the last time we’ll be like this,” you said. “You’ll be off to Kyoto soon, and I’ll go to Tokyo sooner.”
“That’s true,” he said. “We should savor it, then. While we can.”
You knew what he was hinting at, but now was not the time to consider it. Now, you were meant to be happy, so you mirrored that smile of his and posed with him as if nothing was wrong, unsure of whether, in two weeks’ time, you’d be able to look at those particular photos at all.
At some point while you were you were with Aoyama, Tabito appeared, his arms crossed over his chest. He stood a respectful distance away from Aoyama’s mother, and it was only when you stepped away from your boyfriend and left him to his family that he hesitantly approached you.
“Hi,” he said.
“Hi, yourself,” you said. “How’d you manage to find me? There’s so much going on.”
“You’re pretty hard to miss,” he said. You weren’t sure what he meant by that, but he didn’t bother with explaining himself. “You’re probably all photographed-out, but if you don’t mind…can we also take one? I don’t want you to forget that I came, too.”
“You only came for Yayoi,” you teased him. “It’ll hurt my feelings less if I don’t remember you were here at all.”
“I came for you, too!” he said earnestly, showing you both of his hands to prove he wasn’t crossing his fingers behind his back. “Really, I did.”
“So you would’ve come even if Yayoi wasn’t graduating, too?” you said.
“If you invited me, I would’ve,” he said. “I’d even skip soccer practice for it.”
“Wow, you hold me in higher regard than soccer practice? I feel like you’ve bestowed some great honor upon me,” you said. “That’s worthy of a picture, I’d say.”
You handed your phone to a nearby classmate of yours, a pretty girl who you had sat by in your Maths class. She understood quickly what you were asking of her, accepting the phone and waiting for you to get in position.
“Say, L/N, I thought you were dating Aoyama?” she said as Tabito wrapped an arm around your waist and you leaned against his side.
“I am?” you said, confused at why she had brought it up. She furrowed her brow, taking a couple of photos before giving you your phone back to ensure you approved of them.
“Who’s this, then?” she said, nodding towards Tabito. “He’s awfully cute.”
“Huh? Oh, he’s just Yayoi’s brother, it’s not like that!” you said. “But he is so cute, isn’t he? He reminds me of a baby version of Yayoi. It makes me nostalgic sometimes.”
“Yayoi…ah, Karasu! I had Modern Literature with her,” she said, snapping her fingers in recognition. “Wow. I didn’t realize she had a brother. Sorry for making a weird assumption about the two of you! I guess you’ve known one another for a while, so it makes sense that you’d be close.”
“Exactly,” you said, confused about how she had even arrived at such a conclusion in the first place when there was nothing between the two of you to hint at a relationship that was anything but platonic or familial. “Hey, thanks so much! These are awesome.”
“Anytime!” she said. “So, Karasu’s little brother. How old are you, exactly?”
“Um…” Tabito glanced over at you for help, creeping imperceptibly closer as if you were some last line of defense between him and the curious girl.
“He just finished his first year,” you said, taking pity on him and answering. The girl wrinkled her nose.
“So you’re barely a second year? Ah, that’s a bit young for me at the moment. Maybe in a little while, yeah? Call me once you’re in college and then we can talk,” she said, winking at him and fluttering her fingers in a wave before vanishing in the crowd.
You tried very hard not to laugh, but when you turned and saw Tabito’s bewildered expression, you could not help it. When he realized you were laughing at him, he turned a vermillion shade that only he was capable of becoming.
“I’m — I’m sorry she said that. I wouldn’t have agreed with her if I knew she was calling you cute in that way,” you gasped out. “Oh, my poor Tabito. I really didn’t expect that at all, or I would’ve asked Aoyama to stay and take our photos instead.”
“It’s okay,” he said. “I’d like it — um, I’d like it better if you thought of me as cute like that instead of like a baby.”
“But you are a baby,” you cooed.
“I am not!” he said. It was another rendition of the same argument you both had had in the past, and though calling this particular example an argument was certainly a stretch, you did not want to sully the night with even a joking disagreement. So instead of refuting his childish rebuttal, you embraced him tightly.
“Thank you for coming tonight,” you said. “You know I have no siblings of my own, but unlike most with that affliction, I am lucky enough to have met Yayoi, and through her gained a brother of my own.”
He shoved you off of him with a grumble. “I’m not your brother, either.”
“Alright,” you said, raising your hands in the air. “You’re not a baby, and you’re not my brother. Anything else?”
“No,” he said. “Let’s go back to our families. Your parents were looking for you. I think they all want to get dinner together.”
“Lead the way, then,” you said. “I call sitting next to you.”
He glanced at you shyly. “Okay. I don’t think you’ll have much competition there, though, so you don’t have to call it.”
“I just want to be certain. These are the final few weeks I’ll get to see you, aren’t they? I’ll miss you while I’m gone, so I have to stick to you like glue for as long as we have left,” you said, throwing a companionable arm around his shoulders for emphasis.
“Yes,” he said, bending his elbow so he could intertwine his fingers with yours, which dangled loosely by his collarbone. “Stick to me. Until the day you have to leave for good, stay by my side.”
The month in between graduation and the beginning of university was a whirlwind of receiving congratulations from random relatives, packing to move into your new apartment, and visiting your friends from high school, who you might not see for many months or perhaps ever again, now that you were all going in your separate directions.
More than anywhere else, you spent your hours at the Karasu residence. You never did anything particularly special, and neither did you bring up the ever-nearing date of yours and Yayoi’s departures; when the three of you were together — for Tabito insisted on accompanying you no matter how much Yayoi protested — you pretended like it was a normal break, like at the beginning of April you’d all once again return to your respective high schools and things would be exactly as they always had been.
You’d go to your favorite restaurants or run to ice cream shops late at night, laughing and teasing another as you licked at your cones and wandered around the streets. Sometimes you’d all go to the playground and pretend like you were children, sliding down slides that were only twice the length of your bodies and climbing across monkey bars with your feet brushing against the mulch. You’d sit on the swings and make Tabito push you as payback for the many times you had done so for him when he was younger, though he never viewed it as a punishment, and Yayoi would build castles in the sandpit, the grains digging into her skin and standing out in bright red patterns against her pale knees. Other days, if it was raining or any of you were particularly tired, you’d play video games, Tabito laying against your legs as he always did and Yayoi perched on the armrest like a gargoyle.
It was simple and wonderful and easy, but the same could not be said for your relationship with Aoyama. There was a tension between you both which had never been there before, and though he had claimed at graduation that he wanted to savor the last few weeks of your time together, you found yourself thinking more and more frequently that you wished you had ended things when you were still happy with one another.
You fought with him about random things, so irritable were you with one another. He accused you of spending all of your time with Yayoi, even though you’d be so close to her once the next year began, and ignoring him completely. You bit back with ten times the force, telling him plainly that you loved her first, and that even though you’d be nearer to her than him, the two of you would still be apart in a way you never had been, not since you both were six years old. And what of Tabito? What of the boy you had known since he was so young, that boy you had grown up alongside? You would leave him behind for good, and you could not bear the thought.
But in turn, this only angered him further. You like him, Aoyama accused you. You like him more than you like me. You weren’t sure how to respond to this. Of course you liked Tabito more than you liked Aoyama. You liked him more than you liked just about anybody, excepting his sister. Yet when Aoyama said it, it didn’t seem as innocuous as you knew it to be. It was the same thing that that girl from your math class had brought up, that there was something else between you and Tabito. You found it so distasteful that your words turned to poison.
You can’t say that, you’d snap, over and over, however fruitless it always was. He’s a kid. You can’t say that.
Aoyama would laugh bitterly, burying his face in his hands. Sometimes, he’d seem so tired and hollow and sick of it all that you’d regret it, regret whatever had happened between you two that had made you end up like this, but then he’d look up at you again and you’d know that this was the inevitable outcome.
It’s only two years. He’d remind you of that fact every time, and what could you say? It was the truth, and the same thing Tabito always insisted to your deaf ears. Two years or maybe less. 
It’s different, you’d huff when you could not think of anything else. Aoyama would sigh and then one of you would apologize: sometimes you, sometimes him. After that you’d kiss, and things would settle into a distorted version of your old comfort, but each time you ran through that fight or one that was similar, it became a little more difficult and your relationship fractured a little more.
There was no one great mistake. You couldn’t pick out a single moment when everything went wrong, when one of you committed a grave and unforgivable sin. It was just the accumulation of many small grievances, the stress of both of your impending moves as well as the knowledge that the end for you both was near, that blew up into an enormous fight, the kind of confrontation that was only frightening when it was finally over.
You both shouted about everything and yet nothing. The relationship, in its best days, had never had anything worth complaining about, and so it was difficult to find something to genuinely be upset over. He insisted you were cheating on him, or that, if you were not already, you soon would. You spat insults at him that you were not proud of, calling him controlling and cruel and stupid, even if he wasn’t really any of these things, and definitely not in the great quantity you insinuated he was.
I joined the art club for you. That was the last thing he said, when it was officially over and your fist was clenched around the doorknob. I could’ve been a national champion at any sport. Soccer or basketball or baseball or whatever. I could’ve been great, but I stayed in the goddamn art club because I wanted to be with you.
You glanced at him over your shoulder, stepping onto his doorstep, the rage leaving you in a minute, replaced by a deep sense of shame, but also, peculiarly, of freedom. Do you wish you had made a different choice now? Now that it’s come to this, I mean.
He laughed bitterly. Nah. Somehow, I can’t seem to regret it.
A lump formed in your throat, but bravely and surely, you swallowed it back. If you cried now, then you were afraid you’d never leave him. I see. Well, good luck in Kyoto.
Good luck with wherever your life takes you, he said. Tell Yayoi I said the same to her. 
I will, you promised.
Tell that brother of hers, too, he said. And tell him you love him while you’re at it.
There was no merit in responding to that final statement, which was as much an assertion of his perceived correctness as it was a heartfelt attempt at reconciliation. So you turned around, allowing your tears to fall when you heard the door shut behind you, the streetlights guiding your way home as you cried silently to yourself.
You never did see him again. It was probably for the best, anyways. A few days later, you were off to Tokyo, with an entire life ahead of you — a life that had no longer had a place for the dalliances of your past.
You and Yayoi, as well as your parents, took the train to Tokyo together. Tabito stayed at home with his grandmother, though he bemoaned the turn of events; he was about to start his second year of high school, though, so how could he justify tagging along? He did come to the station, however, pretending to be nonchalant and ever-so-cool, like he didn’t care one bit that you and Yayoi were leaving for good.
“I hope you’re not considering a career in the film industry, Tabito,” you said. The three of you were sitting on a bench together, yours and Yayoi’s suitcases at your feet, your parents waiting in line at the window to receive your tickets.
“Why not?” he said stiffly.
“You’re horrible at acting,” you said, your arms going around his firm bicep, your forehead pressing to the curve of his shoulder. “It’s okay for you to be sad.”
“I’m not sad,” he said, his voice a dull, trained monotone.
“I am,” you said. “We’re not going to be like this again for a while. Not ever, in one sense of the word. I think it’s natural to be sad about that.”
“Hmph,” Yayoi said, from Tabito’s other side. She was like her brother, but with marginally more of an aptitude at theatrics. Still, there was a curious sheen to her eyes, a dampness to the typically fiery irises. “That’s not true.”
“It is,” you said. “Things will be different no matter what. I don’t think it’s a bad development, but it’s a true one. We’ll — we’ll be apart, Yayoi, and we’ll have to take taxis to visit each other instead of being close enough to walk.”
“You’ll still be able to visit each other,” Tabito said, his face stoic but his voice trembling. “I won’t even get that. I’ll be hours away and all alone.”
“You have your friends and your soccer team,” you said.
“They’re not you,” he said. You weren’t sure if he meant it for the both of you or you alone. Selfishly, you wished for it to be the latter, though you could not say why and had no claim to him for it to be the case. “Nobody could ever be you.”
“If our mom got pregnant again, someone could be like us,” Yayoi offered with a wavering, half-hearted laugh. “You’ll have another sister then. Name her Ya-Y/N and it’ll be like we never left.”
“I’ll be older than her,” Tabito said. “She’ll be a crying, whiny baby.”
“Sounds like you’ll get along well, then,” Yayoi said. He scoffed and smacked her on the arm. She yelped in dismay and rubbed the sore spot, glaring at him all the while, which did inject some levity into the atmosphere.
Your spirits immediately plummeted once again when the train arrived with a rushing, roaring wind, coasting to a stop, the doors heaving open with a sigh. There was a looming emptiness in every car, mirroring the pit in your stomach and the jagged, frayed tears in your heart, which widened with every step you took towards the edge of the platform.
“See you around, bro,” Yayoi said, doing an elaborate handshake with Tabito. “Good luck with soccer. Call me if our parents are being annoying; I’ll talk to them. You can count on it.”
“Thanks, bro,” he said. “Stay safe in Tokyo. Maybe try to get a boyfriend or something, if you can manage it.”
“Shut up, you little twerp. I definitely can! I’m going to end up dating a model, just you wait and watch!” she said, punching him in the arm lightheartedly and then leaping onto the train without a backwards glance, leaving you and Tabito alone. Your parents were waiting inside with your luggage, and you knew Yayoi would probably be confused about why you hadn’t followed her, but for some reason, you found yourself hesitating.
“You’ll be able to get home from the station by yourself okay?” you fretted.
“Yes, of course,” he said, the corners of his mouth curving up in amusement. “Despite what you and Yayoi seem to believe, I’m not a baby, and besides, my house isn’t that far from here. It won’t be a long walk. I’ll be okay — I’ve had to do worse exercise in practice.”
“Okay, but just be careful,” you said, shifting from foot to foot uneasily, playing with your fingers. “You have people who can help you if something happens and we’re not there, right?”
“I do,” he said.
“And — and stay away from pools,” you instructed him firmly. “Because you suck at swimming and I won’t be there to look out for you anymore.”
“I would’ve done that even if you didn’t tell me to,” he said. “Quit nagging me, Y/N. It’s seriously annoying. Don’t you have to go? You’ll miss the train if you don’t hurry up.”
On cue, the train let out a warning whistle. You swallowed and then nodded, but you didn’t move. You didn’t want to leave him. That was what you realized in that very moment: it wasn’t your entire life that you cared about abandoning. There wasn’t anything much you’d miss about your hometown, and certainly nothing you’d miss more than him. Tabito, your Tabito — because he was yours in a way you were loath to share with even Yayoi, who was his actual sister, and you were suddenly so certain that it had always been so and you had just never discerned it.
“Go on,” he said after a second, nudging you towards the train. “Really, you’ll be in trouble soon.”
You thought that you should tell him, but there were not words enough to describe it, so you did not. You could not. You only forced a smile and then stepped onto the train, clutching the metal bar and facing the platform so that you could gaze at him one final time. The train whistled again, and then Tabito’s expression changed into something strict and determined as he raced forward, skidding to a stop on the painted yellow border right in front of you.
“Did something happen?” you said. He shook his head, motioning for you to come closer. Still holding onto the metal bar for balance, you brought your face to his, thinking he might want to whisper one final secret in your ear before he no longer could. Yet he did not; instead, he pressed his lips to your cheek, one of his hands holding the other carefully, so gentle despite the roughness of his calloused palms.
“Bye, Y/N,” he said. “Don’t forget me while you’re in Tokyo.”
The doors closed and the train shot off as you took a step back, too stunned to shout out a final farewell until it was too late and all you could do was watch as his waving form receded into the distance.
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