#( its 2 am and i dunno what am i doing here but have a pic of a real precious hot prince) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

puppy-phum · 2 years

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https://at.tumblr.com/talays-portkey/bad-buddy-week-2022-day-1-favorite-character/yyuid20tgjuk

How'd you do this amazing gifset? Will you do a tutorial pretty please?

hi anon! sorry am quite late with this but i honestly didn’t know how to go about this ask. but am gonna try so here goes.

the set i am talking about is this one i made for the bad buddy week.

first of all, i wanted to note that this is not a gifset. these are still images and i do photo editing. which just happens to be so bc am too lazy and scared to try and figure out giffing. if you’re looking for gif tutorials, i can recommend the @/usergif blog where they post quite a few ^^ some of them have helped even me bc after you get the basics down you can kind of… morph the giffing tutorials into photo editing bc the main point is the same. but to the tutorial! or at least my attempt at such.

this post has five images and i’m not getting into every detail separately in each of them so i tried to make this tutorial into parts that have different themes! i hope this helps. i honestly have no idea what i'm doing here so feel free to ask more questions! (also sorry but my gimp is in finnish. i’ve tried my best to find the english terms tho)

I. Coloring

i’ve used four types of different coloring techniques in this set. all start with the basics: adjusting the curves by choosing colors > curves to make contrasts a bit stronger (bright parts brighter, shadowy parts darker). my initial plan for this set was to make the images darker than they were so i have also adjusted the curves accordingly (you can bring the upper part of the curve down quite a lot in this).

i don’t have a main setting or anything but i usually aim for an “eye pleasing curve”. i also usually brighten all the colors of the image by dragging up the red, green, and blue channel curves and then adjusting the colors > exposure (not brightness-contrast, do not touch that).

(i am using a random screenshot of patpran as an example in this so excuse me)

on the left i've only adjusted the main curve as seen above and on the right i've added some brightness/saturation by adjusting the blue, green, and red channels too. you can see how the colors pop a bit more. am usually quite moderate when it comes to coloring and colors in general and like subtle touches, but feel free to go wild if that’s what you like.

back to the edit itself then. the first coloring in this set is basic black and white. on gimp, i usually go with the desaturate (pienennä värikylläisyyttä) > desaturate (poista värit) > luma.

i dunno why i like luma so much as the setting but i think it has the best contrast? i like to adjust the contrast even more through exposure by dragging the brightness up a bit and then making the shadows darker and more intense. to show this in my example image:

this process applies to all the b&w images in this set which are parts of images 1, 2, and 5:

the second way of coloring happens through the gradient map (liukuvärikartta) or colorize (väritys). i like to switch between these two to see which one looks nicer. for this set, i think i used colorizing rather than the gradient map bc that’s usually easier.

to use this method, you just take the image you want, choose colors > colorize, and this colors the whole image with the color you choose. i like to usually play around with the settings to get something that looks the most natural. once again to show with my example pic:

the one on the left has a very saturated color that is quite dark. the one on the right has a lighter color with less saturation. if i wanted to adjust the colors further, i’d probably go with some colors > color balance to make final touches and to add in some subtle color variation so that the image doesn’t appear too flat to me.

in this set, i’ve only used this method in image 3 where i have made the right side part simply blue. i didn’t want too bright of a blue so the color is kind of toned down and rather light instead. the base color for its colorization i’ve chosen from one of the other images (most likely the first one).

the third way, which includes both types 3 and 4, happens with selecting certain parts of the image and then adjusting the colors outside of this area. this can be seen in images 1 and 4 but also in 3 and 5. i have merely selected pran’s face to be excluded from what my coloring affects.

i select by hand using the lasso/free select tool (bc am picky like that and hate myself). you can also use the select by color -tool or the fuzzy select (sumea valinta) if you want but they give you various results. choosing by hand has always been my safest bet bc i can control the area i’m selecting. you can try various ways and see what pleases you the most (or what you have the patience for).

in images 1 and 4 (the left side image) i’ve made my selection and then inverted it by right-clicking the image (select (valitse) > invert (käänteinen)) so i can only edit the colors around pran’s face and not affect his skin color.

after the selection is in its place, i click colors > hue-saturation (sävy-värikylläisyys) and play with the colors. you might have to do this several times bc sometimes you can only change certain color to a certain point.

on top of this, i usually use colors > color balance to kind of correct the colors bc changing individual colors separately doesn’t always look as nice. also, brighter spots are often left quite colorless so i might adjust the curves once more to drop the brightness a bit and then get more color to these parts by playing around with the color balance options.

in some cases, i use color balance first to kind of get some color(s) to pop so that it’s easier to change/affect them in hue-saturation. you learn to see this stuff as you go, just play around and try different things.

(for the pic on the left, i think i only used hue-saturation and color balance without ever selecting pran's face bc the background trees and the green in them managed to cooperate with me this time. so cheers to that.)

in images 4 (right) and 5 (left) i have once again selected pran’s face, inverted the selection, and then just used color > colorize. (in image 3 (left) i’ve selected pran’s shirt in the same way but stuck to this selection without inverting it so that i could only change the shirt’s color.)

using this way is a bit risky bc sometimes the selected area and its edges especially stand out. you gotta check how it looks and probably adjust the coloring with some color balance nonsense (be especially careful with shadowy areas while doing this. black is a safe place for an edge (i often use the hair) but if you change the dark part’s color you might be in trouble so don’t touch that). i always just hope that no one pays too much attention to certain lines that might look a bit weird.

with the colorize option you also gotta be careful not to make the colors too intense or bright and try to tone them down to match the original background color level. in image 4 (the middle one in the pic above) this was a bit of a challenge bc colorize was supposed to make the rather bright image darker but i couldn’t make it too dark bc pran’s still bright face started to look funny. but it is what it is i guess. just play around with settings and you’ll get there! exposure and curves are also your best friends.

(also, once you have some area selected, you can use “both sides” of this selection. i often do the outside coloring first, invert the selection back, and then very carefully do some adjustments inside the selection. in this set it would mean doing the main coloring first and then doing some subtle enhancing to pran’s skin color.)

II. Blending

for this edit, each image includes at least two different pictures blended together as the background of the image. mostly i use headshots of pran, tho for example image 2 has farther away shots with pran only as part of the image.

i personally like to do the coloring and blending simultaneously, usually starting with coloring both images close to what i want them to look like, and then blending them together before some final adjustments for the colors.

(also note that on gimp, everything that’s outside the picture frame aka what you can't see isn’t affected by any of your coloring, so be sure to place the pictures where you want them and stick to that placement or you might end up with unwelcome surprises!)

(i mean all this space you have outside your image. the layer edges, the yellow dotted line, can still appear here if the layer is bigger than your actual image!)

what i’ve noticed with blending (or layering) is that you just slowly start figuring out what works and what does not, what images to pick and which images can go together at all. but i am a stubborn mule when it comes to what scenes i wish to stick together, so i suffer continuously. not every result is as pretty as i hoped it would be.

but well, photo editing gives you that freedom. it gives you a lot more moving room than giffing, which i personally think is a huge plus. you can get down to the details and not think about how those details might appear once the image moves. yall making gifs are magicians who i can only bow down to. wish i had your power.

but yeah, my basic blending method is to use the other image as the “background” and then plaster the other on top of it as a screen. (i also add an all-black background under both images to help me once am actually doing the blending bc otherwise you will get holes into your images. use black to keep your actual colors! you can try with white instead to know what i mean.)

i cut the image set to normal to how i want it to appear and to the size i want it to be (in this set it’s a 1079x1079 square bc the height of the screenshots) and then bring in the other image and set it as screen.

with this, it’s easier to see how the two images might settle together. i apologize for not having the original screenshots to demonstrate this anymore but once one of the images is how you want them, you can easily drag the one set to screen around and figure out its placement. for this first image i wanted both prans to stick quite close to the center so that the colored one would kind of emerge from the black & white version’s hair. i guess you can see what i mean here:

(the result as seen on the set without the text layers)

for the actual blending i use layer masks and the gradient tool. add a layer mask to the image you wish to edit by right-clicking the layer (before doing this, make sure this layer is the same size as your image by doing this on the right-click menu of the layer:

this says “layer to image size”. this cuts everything outside the image border off of that layer or if the layer is smaller, adds see-through parts to fill it. if you don’t do this, you will get these very unfortunate lines while blending bc the gradient tool’s effect + the layer mask won’t reach outside the layer’s edges).

now choose the layer mask you created to be white (full opacity), and then choose edit layer mask (this is usually the main setting but you can check by right-clicking the layer again).

now choose the gradient tool, your colors being black and white. the shape of the gradient can be linear (lineaarinen) or radial (säteittäinen). i usually choose them depending on how much of the image i kind of need to “take away”. the linear shape is good for cases where you need half of the image to blend away or want a straighter line to your blending, radial works best for a bit more detailed blending and softer edges. i usually start with linear and then switch to radial if i feel like i need more of an abstract shape.

for the first image of the set, i think i’ve mostly used radial bc i didn't need to take away too much. in the above images, you can see the strongest blending happening in the b&w image around pran’s ear which i’ve made “disappear” so that the colored pran shows up better. technically, blending is just turning parts of your image black so that other images can show up better in those parts.

note that on gimp, you can only use the gradient tool once on a layer mask. at least this is how i’ve taken it works, anyone correct me if you know better. but bc of this, when you’re done with one gradient, right-click your layer and then choose apply layer mask (toteuta tasomaski).

this makes the gradient actually “happen”, and after this you’re editing your normal image again without the layer mask present. if you need to do more gradients, add another layer mask and edit that. repeat the cycle until you’re satisfied. (i also use the layer masks and gradient tool to make some of these images darker, especially from bright corners. this is where your total black backround comes in handy!)

in this set, my blending/layering also includes a color layer (i usually name it sävy which means hue) which in this one adds more blue to the image. it’s basically just a whole blue layer on top of the background images. it is set to screen and then blended out to look like this hazy color on top of the image.

in the image 1 this layer shows up on the left side edge (note the subtle blue). bc it’s sometimes hard to work with only one of these types of layers, i might add several. or if i want different colors then i need several of these too. i love them tbh and have been using them quite a lot in the past. i think in this set only image 4 doesn’t have a layer like this bc it was already so blue it didn’t need it.

another thing i’ve blended into the background images is the texture. images 1, 2, and 4 include textures (or at least what i like to call textures). for the first image it’s the windows/pillars, for the second one it’s the text, and for the fourth one the armor texture. these are just images added on top of the others. once again set to screen, then blended out to not cover too much of the main background. adjust the coloring to make them blend in better. i prefer making the textures black and white and then adjusting their brightness but you can try different ways.

if you wish to know more about how the gradient tool and the layer masks work, feel free to ask!

III. Typography

my favorite thing! really, it’s just up there. i love playing with the text and different fonts. in this tutorial, i will mostly focus on the gradient map effect i use for most of the main titles in this set. i see ppl using this technique a lot in gifs these days and tbqh, i think it also looks a bit better like that bc there’s the movement to help it stand out more. but it also works for still images if you make it right (which. am not sure i can do but i am trying my best). first of all, create your text layer and place it where you want it to be in the image. if you want it tilted or something, do that now too. then hide the layer.

next, you need a copy of your whole background image (or at least the parts of it you wish to show up in the text). for example, in image 4 i have not included the armor texture to this bc i thought it would look too messy (the text is quite small and the smaller details won’t show up so you might need to abandon some). you can create the copy by right-clicking the layers and choosing “new from visible” (uusi näkyvästä).

this should create a new layer that has all your visible layers stacked together as one.

then you need to pick your colors. i picked from the images i’ve used bc that guarantees that the colors fit. the front color needs to be bright and the back color dark/very saturated for this to work. you can adjust the gradient these colors create on the gradient editing page on the right. i usually like to bring the middle point a bit closer to the left so that the “shadows” get a starker line but this might also just be some kind of a placebo effect. i often end up editing the result a lot with other adjustments anyway so it doesn't really matter to me.

(am using my random screenshot as an example again bc it’s easier to work with)

now choose the layer with the copy of your background and click colors > map (määritä) > gradient map (liukuvärikartta).

this should create an image that has your chosen colors looking like the bright and shadowy parts got inverted. here to show it with my example image:

on the right image i’ve then played with the contrasts using curves and exposure. this is also the only point where i might use brightness-contrast. i usually like stark contrasts bc otherwise the differences and colors won’t show up as well in the text. note that adjusting the brightness at this point might also affect the hue (see how the pink has turned more red after i did some exposure adjustments).

now go to your text layer and by right-clicking it, make a selection out of the alpha.

choose the image layer you just did the gradient map on, still with the selection active. invert the selection and then hit delete. you should now have the text as this nice colored gradient that shows details of your image in it. you can adjust the colors even more now that you know how the text looks on top of your image.

another way to do this, which i’ve tried lately, is to create the gradient map image with black and white so you can easily adjust the contrasts, and then use colorize to get the color you want. i think this works well too, tho the result is a bit different bc the other color is always black (so this doesn’t allow you to use more than one color basically). you can try both ways and see which one looks the best.

(i guess the same result you get by making the gradient map out of your chosen color and black. i just like being difficult :’D)

some comparisons of the text results:

and how the text looks in the edit itself:

(this one is without the white “shadow” i’ve made out of the text layer that would otherwise stay hidden.)

IV. Additional Details

bc i’m a hoe for details i usually have a ton of these in my edits. i both hate and love them. i love how they look but making them is always a pain. most of the time in making these goes to the png hunting which doesn’t seem to get any easier even if i keep finding new sites and tools for it. if you need recs for where to find pngs and other resources, here’s one list. otherwise i just recommend googling and going around the world wide web.

the details am focusing on here are the statistics in image 2 plus the sword in image 4. both are quite simple to make but require a bit of patience (and trial and error which i’ve figured is a requirement for most editing).

beginning with the statistic boxes which i agonized over while making this set. my first plan was to create them myself by just making little boxes but i started thinking those wouldn’t look nice. so in the end i just ended up downloading the standard dnd character sheet you can find online as a pdf and then cut one of the statistic boxes from there. for this, i actually used the fuzzy selection tool so that i wouldn’t have to cut everything by hand. it worked quite nicely for such small details.

the dnd font you can find online and download for free. then i’ve just colored the borders of the boxes blue rather than black (using colorize i think) and made them a bit see-through (drop the layer opacity). i recommend duplicating the box layer only after this point so you can have the same coloring for each. then add the texts inside each and done. (as a side note, make a habit out of naming your layers appropriately. it might seem like a waste of time but trust me, you will thank yourself later when you have way too many layers and zero idea which is which.)

the sword was a bit more complicated. i created the sword-in-stone image myself by finding a png pic of a sword i could use for the handle and then just. drawing the stones with the brush by using straight lines (press shift while using the brush). i quite closely followed the image used in the insp post of this set, tho i wanted the sword in mine to be a bit bigger and have the images set differently. i struggled some but i think the result looks quite cool.

this is how the border looks. your goal is to manage to draw something like this for yourself which is the easiest once you have something to use as reference (the png).

the images used in the sword i’ve colored separately using the colorize method for the colored ones and the desaturate > luma for the b&w ones. adjust them with some curves/exposure. then i brought them onto the main image, made them smaller, and fit them inside the lines i’d drawn on a separate layer. be sure you always draw things on a separate layer (or so help me god).

these lines are also easy to use for cropping the images once you need to cut them into shape. i remember doing this by following the lines i’d drawn while using the lasso/free selection tool (you get straight lines automatically with this one so very easy). it takes some time but with straight lines, it’s not too much of a hassle. then just delete the parts you don’t want showing in the image.

(be careful tho while adjusting the image inside the lines so that you don’t get any empty corners etc. or you will break the shape!)

this is how the “sword” looks without the border:

(i’ve been very obsessed with such shapes made out of pieces lately so i will probably suffer with similar things in the future too while trying to figure out easier ways to do it. let’s see what happens.)

but this was basically it! if you need more details or want me to explain something again feel free to ask! i hope this helps you somewhat. thank you so much for asking, i love sharing my process even if it does sound very messy like this :’D i also like sharing more details about gimp bc i feel like i’m such a black sheep when it comes to using it.

have an amazing day!

#uuhh really dunno how to tag this #tutorial #???? idk man #can this be called that when this is a mess #but i had fun creating this!!#hoping this answered any of your questions #or was anything you hoped

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huwanachapaula · 2 years

Text

January 29, 2023

Dear Mr. Noel Cea,

I actually don't know how and why should I start this virtual letter I am about to send you. Dae ko na daw aram tanu HAHAHAHAH Well, I dunno when was the first time that you sent me a message and when ka nagreply sa stories ko sa facebook knowing that I am in Bora Hut that time. I am sorry, I used to delete conversation, sorry na gayod hahahaha I stalked you before bago taka i-confirm actually and from that I always noticed na papansinon ka sa sa stories ko kasi permi ka nagrereact and that moment sabi ko "papansinon dae man nagchachat" chariz HAHAHAHAHAH To tell you honestly,I really talk with couple of guys to see who is really serious or not, sabi nga collect and select, but I am wiser than what you think naman like what I said sa story ko dati saimu. lol Sorry na, at least I am being honest diba hahahaha but always keep in mind that no matter how many boys I have met before, di man ako ang typical girl na mabibisto mo, bako man po akong kaladkarin, aram ko man sain ako dapat mag-iba. Anyway, to make the story short, nagchat ka palan sa ig ko asking about what is the item that I am selling and asking if may t-shirt or sando pa na available haha papansin yan or naghahapot ka talaga about sa item? HAHAHAHHAHA CHAROT LANGS HAHAHA ASSUMING LANG AKO HAHAHAHA

Uya tabi ang proof na papansinun ka tabi HAHAHAHAHAHAH this was August 18, 2022 and yeah di ko sure if nagkahilingan na kita dyan kasi behh I am not really good with dates and numbers to tell you honestly. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

*Pero feeling ko papansinun ka lang sa part na yan hahahaha chariz

Why am I writing this nga ba noh? I actually don't know ehh habu ko man kaya na kiligun ka and baka mag explode na naman namamati mo hahays kasi arog ka kanio kapag kinikilig HAHAHAHAHAHA look at this, puruso ka permi hahays

See? kilig na yern dae pa ngane nasa introduction pa sana kita mayo pa sa climax HAHAHAHAHAHAHA Dae ko aram how to make this letter and to make you feel na maogma ako sa gabos na bagay na ginigibo mo for me, damn it. I actually don't know how to respond sa mga sweet things you do, kasi I am sweet din and iba palan kapag ika na mismo nakakamati kang sweetness ahahahah bahala ka dyan HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

See? hilinga na naman mukha mo naku hahaha well, arog kanio permi mukha ko kapag nagdududa HAHAHAHAHA I am always doubting all the people around me weather they are just being nice, friendly or what hahahaha I am a friendly person so baka ang isipon mo malandi ako haha char I actually do have some male friends just to make things clear ah HAHAHAHAHAHA Yieeee, dae ko na aram sasabihun ko dawa ganu man ako kadaldal beh ika kaya hahays Hilinga man daw pic mo here naols kaya Pogi hmmm pira na daw napahibi kanio ayy siguro mga lima or sampulo? dae ta sure hahahahaha baka nga paparauto mo lang ako hahaha pero oks lang bako man ako luge aahahaha ika man lang luge if ever HAHAHHAHAHA If you are going to cheat on me and or if this relationship won't work then its fine, I am getting used of the pain, so no need to worry. *Pero pogi ka sa mirror selfie yieee dyan ka lang tagilid ka na lang forever chariz

I dunno what is the main reason why you are into me (or assuming lang talaga ako HAHAHAHA) Pero feeling ko naging effective talaga si gayuma na tiglaag ko chariz hahaha I am hoping that the feelings you have showed me and the efforts you have exerted will still be consistent. Dae ta aram baka sa enot lang yan hahaha anyway, I am not expecting anything from you naman and I wanted you to prioritize your family always. Yan lang ang gusto ko, never put me as your TOP priority. Always keep on mind that Huwana should always be on the TOP 3 only ahhh kasi it should be as follows:

1. Your Family 2. Yourself 3. Huwanatot

Syeahhh talaga naman pogi yern, why u so serious kasi sa mga pic? Aram ko na hmmm dgdi kaya sa mga pic na nio dae mo pa ako bisto so mayo pa saimu nagpapangerit ahahays tama talaga ako chariz HAHAHAHAHAHA joke lang ahh baka magsabi ka totoo man kaya haha

One photo that I liked the most itong pic na ito (below) kasi look, pacuteton ka dyan beh hahahaha dae man bagay hahays ahhaaha anyway, cutiee ng eyebrow mo dyan ahahaha syeahhhh ngeririt ka na naman sa pic na yan ta aram mo na nagrereply na ako saimu hahaha chariz hhahahaha baliw na baliw ka na gayod sakuya hahays pero araw mo na yan na ang gusto ko yung ulol nna ulol sakin ahahaha itong tipong dae makakahangos kapag dae mo ako nakakaulay chariz lang HAHAHAHAHHAHA

Anyway, why I am writing this one?? I wanna make some expectations and to make things clear hahahaha diba parang naglelesson plan ako kingina hahahahah A+ for effort ako neto Noel, grabe na yan hahaha ito ayaw ko ehh nag-eefort na naman ako sa maling tao hahahaha chariz HAHAHAHAH bahala ka dyan hahaha I want you to know that Huwana is just simple and hindi naman sya high standards and di rin sya yung tipo ng babae na high maintenance. I don't demand too much kasi alam ko deserved ko and boyish type din ako so, yan hahahaha baka mabigla ka na mas lalaki pa ako saimu hahahaha I dunno but I am born this way, I can be a boy and a girl at the same time hahahaha pero one thing I can assure you is that Huwana is a soft-hearted person you will ever met haha char topakin nga lang HAHAHAHAHA

She is not perfect like what you have thought, she has lot of flaws and no one has appreciated it yet. She always doubts her capabilities most of the time and she never believed that she is indeed beautiful. She has a lot of insecurities and no one can take that away from her hahahaha

So ayun na nga, I want you to know na si Huwana is also a human na simple lang, habu ko man kaya na isipon mo na harayuon ako. Look at the photo above, yes magayon sya (charot lang) and she wears an elegant dress, pero I am telling you Huwana ang saro sa pinaka-kalog na mabibisto mong tao. I want you to remove the concept na si Huwana arog kanio, arog kanio. Gusto ko isipon mo ako as a tao na halos mayo kang idea about sako. Well, we have a lot time to know each other pa naman.

I wanna say na sana, you will help me grow as an individual. I want a relationship na healthy and will not make my life miserable. Expect me na I will not be controlling, I will let you do whatever you want kasi you have a life to live and that's okay, if magloko ka then its your choice, but then tell me honestly. Likewise naman katulad ng sabi ko if magloko ako then okay its my choice lol

Sana, we can achieve all the goals we have together hahaha damn sweet na naman ako hanep HAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOKO NA SA EARTH AHAHHAAH HUWANA IS TURNING INTO SOMETHING NA DAE MO INAAKALA HAHAHAHAHAHHAA naku Noel dae mo ako pagburbaran ta nyaaaa mahahanap mo hinahanap mo hahahaha Anyway, focus lang kita sa positive ahhh eheheheheh

Like what I have said naman before sayo, if tayo tayo diba? if hindi okay. But having a life time partner requires an effort for both side, it should always be reciprocated and not one sided love, coz that makes the relationship works and grow hmm sorry na haha madaldalun na naman ako.

Dito na tayo sa finale part, okay pinalaba laba ko na naman nag letter. I was about to send you love letters na hand written kaso panu naman? char hahahaha bahala ka man dyan. So ayan na nga po yung pinakahihintay ni Noel........

Yes, sinasagot na kita..... Huwag ka kiligin please ahahahahaha

I should make the ligawan for a year, but then maybe it would be a long process and you were just going to make things to impress me, siguro kapag kita na the idea will be real na mayong halong pa-impress. lol hahahaha I was planning to say this personally pero dae sya possible kasi nga pahali na din ako and both of us will work on board so yun. Saying yes immediately, doesn't necessarily mean that I am easy to get, it only means that I want to know you more and having a label is the best way para mabisto taka. Anyway, sana dae ka man magbago, I hope the consistency will still be there and the effort will be the same. Am I expecting too much? Well, if mademand ako bako sa material things, I would want to have the faithfulness and loyalty hahaha I could buy myself everything naman ehh chariz atang may entry na kuta ako sa trending song na "I can buy myself flowers" tapos bigla ka nagpadara ning flowers nawara lugod angas ko hahahaha sana hindi ito love bombing ahh sana genuine love namamati mo hahahaha

I started making this letter kang nakaaging January 25 pa hahaha I was about to send you this but then sabi ko sa 29 na lang para at least memorable ang number 29 ayieeeee kilig na naman yern hahahaha Time check 1:36 am na naman and mala mata pa ako.Sorry na pinuyatan ko kaya ang letter ko haha chariz hahaha dae na tabi kiligun ta nya baka dae ka makafocus sa work mo yiee ahahhaahaha

Thank you for always making me feel special and loved, sana totoo na nga nio ta kung dae kukutusan taka dyan hahahaha

Sige na ta grabe na namanm si Huwana sa namamati nya hahahaha

Byeeee..

See you soon love ayieeee

Love,

Huwanatot

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starkiller-009 · 3 years

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1, 15, 22 for your art ask meme!

15. any upcoming planned drawings OK SO SUPRISINGLY THERE IS A LOT. the pacific thing is a mysterious one for me since my level of productivity is kinda NOWHERE NEAR THE NORM. which is a good thing. im actually drawing something and FINISH STUFF? incredible.

there are 1 drawing with sledgefu that is almost finished and kinda too shugary lmao, 2 which i really like but they are not typical for me (happens when i get really inspired while reading some sergio toppi comics and wanna do something beautiful like that but u know. im howhere fucking near sergio, he is a God figure). around 8 sketches here and there waiting for they turn. Lots of Eugene since im Eugene kinny. lots of things just in thoughts - wanted to draw comfy sweety thing with eugene and his dog, a few fanarts for fics i liked (around 6?). one kinda symbolic one - i really liked one work and could not figure out how to draw something based on it since its very kinda.. not about pictures but about thoughts and inner being and well. i FIGURED OUT how to do this so now i must. also there are like 2 nsfw sketches and i am not sure that they are going to see the light lmao it feels kinda awkward to post dicks in public. people fucking. jesus christ. maybe later. Besides the pacific probably will draw something with band of brothers. and um Encanto? lmao. Sheriff Grayson from Arcane? She is not popular enough but DESERVES jesus christ the only character i enjoed as fuck. (i mean her voice COME ON) Spideys are in mind as well. maybe TWD, want to remember the old times. Borderlands too. basically i want a lot but sure only about the pacific ones for now tbh. if we talk about my personal stuff - i wanted to try to make some kind of.. historical illustrations? i have in mind some pictures with Amundsen, his journey to north pole. history related to polar regions and their explorers in general. Icebreakers and aircraft as well. idk when i put my hands to it. would be nice. 1. Favorite drawing from this year oh i guess my favorite is that one with eugene being sad? i dunno already tbh. I dont really like a texture there but in the whole its pretty nice and has its own mood and thats something i really fond of. I love the lightning and the pic has some harmony to it comparing with my other stuff so yeah. Love that one with sledgefu for getmeans fic too.

22. what are you best at drawing/doing (ex: youre good at lineart, or drawings hands, etc.) Um for now i guess its the mood? the atmosphere? (so i pay attention to the lightning and usually result is kinda nice?) i just want to evoke some feelings lmao. Convey it. Not just be pretty tho i love when its pretty too. It just has to.. have something in it more than. just lines. U know. this way i can be really proud of it and fond of. i get bored drawing things for them just to be beautiful (makes me sad tho and it also has to do with my lack of skill basically. i need an idea a story floating around to keep me going). So yeah thats it. A lots of thing to improve but there is no end to it in art anyway.

#ask meme

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dianaburnwood · 4 years

Text

HITMAN 3: First Impressions

This post is full of SPOILERS. Also, it is LONG, so.... yeah. Be prepared lol

HITMAN 3. Also known as: Diana’s Game.

Dear GOD I am in love.

I’m going to do my best to make this coherent. But. I am still freaking out. And I have SO much more to explore!!!! This won’t be very in-depth because I played each map exactly once so far. There’s so much left to see, conversations to overhear, opportunities to exploit - but, I DO have some first impressions, oh hell yes.

Menu:

That menu music!!! I was not expecting that at all. It was a mix of choral and classical with previous themes intertwined, and it reminded me of Blood Money. Speaking of Blood Money, this game is Blood Money.

Dubai:

Very, very beautiful. Kinda thought Grey made it all about himself lol of course he wanted to say “in your face” to the partners, but it was like 47 was just there to pull the trigger, like he’d not been hurt by them too. But, I really liked it. Trapping them in a room and watching them freak while Grey watched me kill them?? Helloo??? Popping off HARD from the start and I love it.

So - here’s the thing. I don’t get the timing. Diana tells them then that Edwards escaped. Did he escape just before the boys got to Dubai? Or were they unavailable to reach until then? It seems that the message Grey got at the end of HAVEN was after Olivia hacked the HAVEN servers, and then the boys were out of reach so after Diana discovered Edwards was gone, she couldn’t tell them until Dubai? And it was shown to us in a different order to leave us hanging? I dunno. Maybe? It seems weird.

THE CUTSCENE here omg - once again establishing that 47 and Diana are ride or die. “Diana will make it right, she always does” - BABE. BABE. SWEET BOY. His little face when Grey doesn’t trust Diana. OMGGG.

Dartmoor:

I went the murder mystery route, of course. I figured it was Emma from her conversation with her husband, but I got all the clues after just to be sure. Can’t believe Carlisle just handed 47 the file on Edwards and then went out alone on the balcony like I wasn’t gonna kill her??? Bitch????? do you forget who i am?????? Anyway, the murder mystery was SO much fun, but I can’t wait to infiltrate this manor in other ways. Lots of Beldingford vibes here.

THE CUTSCENE bdsfgafhlsjfah WAHT????? Ok so HOW did Edwards know where they were? And - ok, so it made for an amazing scene, but Grey is a badass. He is a mercenary genius that duped the ICA and brought Providence to its knees. How did he get himself surrounded in the woods by CICADA? But he did, and it was beautiful, and he literally only shot himself to save 47, and the LOOK in 47′s eyes on his balaclava face - I just bfjKSFasad. I can’t believe he died so early tho. I was very sure he’d die somehow, but SO early. WOW.

Berlin:

fucking hell. Berlin. fuck. fucckkkk.

I wanna shout out to Mini (not gonna tag you in case you’re avoiding spoilers) but hot damn girl if you’re reading you were BANG ON about 47 wearing Grey’s coat. I really didn’t think it was his. It was. It is such a beautiful way for 47 to express his emotions about this death without actually saying anything. Omg. It was perfection. I’m crying thinking about it.

BERLIN was where this game really upped its... game. Like WOW. 5 targets, and it’s the ICA. Clearly Edwards went to the ICA board at this stage and was like uhhhh so you need to take these ppl out. HOWEVER I am amazed that the ICA is like “oh, ok”. DO you not remember what happened in SOUTH DAKOTA.

But going after the ICA is a fucking trip and I love it. I love how 47 says each agent’s name to himself. I love how he listens in and the team handler realises it. I love how she pulls the rest of her team out once you get 5. I love that the ICA agents use disguises too!!! This is truly APEX PREDATOR and I love that they named it that. Y’all think you have the balls to go up against 47??? bitch?????

But the fact that you have to find the targets and none of them are marked is so fantastic. I found 6, but I have no idea how many are actually available - but I’m gonna find out!!! The club is HUGE as well, and lots of throwbacks to Contracts, especially with the biker gang. Amazing. Amazing level. I’m so excited to replay it.

Also they really addressed the elephant in the room with the ICA agents describing 47 as a caucasian male, bald, average height and ppl being like uh that’s every man here, and then he said yeah but he’s got this big tattoo lmao

Chongqing

ok this is where I started to think this game was my fanfiction. Inside the ICA? Showing off how truly international it is, and high tech. Hidden in plain sight. Ready to dismantle in 12 hours if needed. SO perfect. This lore builds on Absolution and Blood Money ICA lore in wonderful ways.

Also, I don’t know why the IOI and DK of the logo looked different in the trailer, they must have been just hard to make out. Cos in the game, the ICA logo is the same as all previous games.

Also, analysts do client vetting? Intrigue. Always assumed that was part of the handlers’ job. I take it all back Diana, you have never done anything wrong in your life, ever

I killed Royce by firing the ppl she recommended so she’d get trapped in the data core cleaning. I killed Hush (what a name I love it) as his patient.

Working with Olivia is really fun. I missed Diana, but Olivia brought a whole fresh perspective. I also really like how neither Grey nor Olivia are as good as Diana - they both fucked up while guiding 47 at least once.

47 saying “...I will leave you to prepare” to Olivia, I yelled fdagsfa

Also I love how 47 decided to expose the ICA exactly like Diana did in Absolution. Those two. One of a kind. My heart. And his desire to protect her. I love that the files showed their start together. Olivia saying “I can see why you...” and then she stopped herself. We all KNOW what she was gonna say.

AND AND AND AND

the cutscene - I screamed

“47 has one weakness. Me.”

I swear to fucking GOD, IO has seen into my soul. I’ve said all along that Diana is 47′s weakness, and he is hers. But to hear it said, aloud, by my girl? WHAT???!!!!!

Mendoza

Ok. OK. OKKKKKK. OK. I can’t even write about this one. This was where I was pretty sure I was hallucinating the entire level. This is my Diana and 47 dreams come true. This is insane. This is EVERYTHING.

So we have OUR MOMENT IN THE SUN. She puts her HAND on HIS HAND and he looks in fucking wonderment at it. ahugarhiewEG;FEJGHEFlejlhsgfes;gjrsgt. I can’t. I can barely get through writing about this.

Diana - the dress, the Jolie thigh slit, the jewellery, the hair (they finally fixed her fucking hair), SASS. “I have tango fever” omg.

How do these ppl not have a pic of 47 by now lol

I followed Diana and Vidal around cos I was entranced by my girl. Diana was fucking amazing each time. So much sass. Little did I know I interrupted them enough times for Vidal to say “ok son let’s talk”. I saw the tango and I was like omg imagine if I could dance with Diana.

well.

WELL.

Anyway, got to kill Vidal via her own setup for me, and that was amazing. I wasn’t expecting it at all. I snuck into the house to kill Yates, and overheard him calling Edwards’ voicemail. Also, it is April 2021?? So, yeah. My previous dates were way wrong lol.

And then, ALL MY DREAMS CAME TRUE. Diana and 47 fucking dancing the tango? I was pissed that I was in a security guard outfit, next time I play he will be in his tuxedo baby.

Diana’s comments to 47 when he’s in disguise tho, I was freaking. As security “you look like a true professional. I feel so much safer with you gentlemen around” aaahhhh

UH HE FELL TO THE GROUND COS OF POISON fngjfagfljgnsdfa

I am so glad I was right about my baby girl tho. She even told him “you didn’t have a choice” about her parents. Good. I’m so glad I was right about that. But omg it broke my heart to have 47 so, SO, SOOO sure of Diana all along, defending her to Grey and Olivia, knowing, KNOWING that she was on his side, and then, he eventually started to doubt it.

I was screaming at my screen - this is BLOOD MONEY! SHe is doing what she did in BLOOD MONEY!!!!

But, for a second, 47 wasn’t sure anymore. And Diana played her part well.

Carpathian Mountains

Ok, what I love most about Contracts was how it gave us an insight into 47′s psyche, and this game upped that tenfold. Him seeing all his targets surround him? Him imagining Diana and the Constant dancing together? Him imagining her say terrible things about him, things he’s thought about himself deep down, always, omg, but he finally snapped out of it. Ironic that thinking about Grey snapped him out of it, when in life Grey had not trusted Diana. But 47 came to the realisation on his own. Diana would never betray him.

opening that door and finding out you’re on a fucking train?????? I screamed.

I am a bit disappointed that it turned out Romania wasn’t significant, they just happened to be passing through. But omg the fact that you are “subject 47″ again. I freaked. This is 47′s worst nightmare.

I love that you have a free pass to kill everyone in this level. I did it in stealth anyway, cos it felt wonderfully tense to sneak through that train. But wow. This is another BIG risk that IO took. The train was straight out of Uncharted, and crafting a silencer for your pistol??? Hello The Last of Us????? But I don’t care. They used those elements super well.

I think some people will be angry at this game because parts of it (especially the last level) were a departure from how HITMAN and HITMAN 2 worked. But I love it. I love that they took risks to tell the story they wanted to tell, and those risks paid off.

47′s undying loyalty to Diana, omg. Telling Edwards bye bitch, I’ll never forget who I am again, and Diana thinks you suck. <3<3<3<3<3

ENDING

OH MY GOD. ONE YEAR LATER????? 47 obviously took some time off cos he fucking needed a break. But he’s back, baby. Ending on “it’s good to be back” was wonderful. The game ended where the 2015 trailer for HITMAN started, and I’m crying. He’s ready to continue with Diana, and not because it’s what he was made to do, not because he doesn’t know what else to do, but finally, because he CHOOSES to do that.

But one year later? What does that mean? Has Diana rebuilt the ICA like in Blood Money, or will she and 47 work together without anyone else? They’ll need the infrastructure that an organisation like the ICA has though. Diana said she would dismantle Providence from the top down once Edwards was gone, but how? Does that mean dismantling what’s left of the ICA? They were one and the same by the end of the game. All that didn’t just disappear. I’m left with so many questions.

I was disappointed Diana wasn’t in the cabin when 47 got there. And I wonder why she wasn’t. She knew he was coming, but they are clearly still on good terms. Maybe she wasn’t sure what to expect. But does that mean they hadn’t spoken in a year since??? But she didn’t sound surprised to hear him, and he had coordinates that he was following, so I think they arranged to meet. But her phone was in there when he arrived, and she wasn’t. Maybe he was tracking her phone? Did she come back there to him after?????

BUT BUT BUT BUT BUT BUT

the game

ended

with 47

smiling

And for that I will be forever grateful.

Ok bye, I need to play it again. RIP work tomorrow lol

#hitman 3 first impressions #hitman3spoilers

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baeklination · 4 years

Text

Ocean: the deep (2)

Pic: comma.

Date: 210114

Warnings/Contains: angst, abuse (ment./emot.), gen.explicit language

Pairing: au! Baekhyun x F. Reader

WC: 7,9k

NOTE: It’s not all angst, but describing it as fluff feels off. On sensitive/explicit topics.

Prologue Masterlist

¤¤

Alot of us tell ourselves “I’d know”, but chances are you wouldn’t. Not if they didn’t want you to. And if they did, showed you a sliver of the truth, would you be brave enough to see it instead of thinking up an excuse?

¤¤

“Are you okay?”, Beanie asks, putting the break on her stroller so you can sit down on the park bench.

“Me? Yeah, I’m fine. A little tired. Still getting used to drinking wine instead of mixed drinks I guess.”

“No, not you. I mean you guys, you and Baekhyun.”

“What do you mean? You saw him last night.” Doubt finding its way to your mind - she has after all known him for longer than you. “Did...Did he say something to you?”

“No, but I noticed…”, she turns to you, stalling. “Don’t get mad, alright?”

“Why would I get mad?”

“Just… I’m gonna say something and I don’t want you to get mad at me.”

“Okay, I won’t get mad, Bean. What?”

“I’ve been married to Minnie for a while now, so I see Baekhyun alot, and I’ve heard some things - rumours I guess - that maybe, you know…”

“Don’t say it, Bean. Please don’t say it.” Heart sinking, you brace yourself and ask her.

“That he sleeps around..?”

“No, not that. More that he’s maybe...not so...kind.”

“What..?”, you burst out.

“Like I said, it’s rumours, I never really hung out with his girlfriends before, so I wouldn’t know. But I…”

Beanie’s fidgeting makes your throat tighten.

“I feel like Baekhyun used to dote on you, but lately he’s been acting more like...your dad.”

“That’s ridiculous..!”, you say, swatting your hand in the air. “Besides, don’t dads dote on their kids, hm?”

“But you’re not his daughter”, she says bluntly, fixing her eyes on you.

“Are you talking about something specific that happened last night?”

¤¤

Hearing the lock turn you breathe a sigh of relief; having a dinner party at home without the owner of said home wasn’t your plan. Baekhyun stops in the living room to greet his guests and engage in the usual banter - as if he didn’t see half of them earlier in the day - before you hear his footsteps nearing the kitchen.

“Sorry I’m late, sweetie. I just couldn’t seem to get out..!”, he huffs.

Putting on your best Suzy Homemaker air (jokingly, of course), you turn around with your arms open.

“You’re just in time, Baekhyun. Honestly, I just took the lasagna out of the oven.”

“Wow, this looks great…”, Baekhyun says, taking the sight of your carefully planned dishes in before kissing you. “But…Are you wearing that?”, he says leaning back, his eyes slightly narrowing.

“Hm? You picked this dress. Don’t you remember?”, you say puzzled.

“Of course I remember. But it’s...more for me, isn’t it? Just me. Maybe put on something more modest?”

“Modest..?”, you laugh. “This isn’t worse than any of the other girls...”

“Well, you don’t have to be like them, do you? You’re my girl, aren’t you?”, he coos.

You know he’s being overly sensitive, but it won’t cost your ego much to change - not as much as this dinner ruined would, so you lift your hands up in defeat.

“Okay, you win”, you sigh.

His smile lights up not only his face, but your entire being. His hands on your cheeks is a promise of sweet touches to be given later on; his lips one of your name being whispered in love.

“I’ll set the table, sweetie.”

“You changed your dress?”, Beanie asks.

“Serves me right for not wearing an apron”, you chuckle as you sit down.

Baekhyun takes your hand and smiles.

“Please, everyone”, you gesture to the fully laden table “enjoy.”

¤¤

“No, I mean in general.”

“Well, in general, you’ve nothing to worry about. Sure, I don’t get flowers delivered every other day like before, but that’s because I practically live with him now. You know how it is”, you say, gesturing to her stroller. “The beginning is always a fairytale, and then it becomes something else. You don’t need all the trimmings when you realise you…”

“Love each other?”, Beanie says, leaning forward with big eyes.

“Yeah…”, you say, shrugging your shoulders.

“Baekhyun said the L word to you..!”

“A month ago. And every day since. God, why am I embarrassed to say it!? Stop laughing, Bean!”

“I’m sorry. This is great!”, Beanie replies, clapping her hands. “Now I feel bad for dragging him like that...”

“I won’t tell on you.” You sit quiet for a moment, then continue. “And when you say “dad”, if you mean how he sometimes suggests things for me to do, or wear, I dunno, it’s because I’ve asked him to. You know I’m not from around here, so sometimes when we go places, say for dinner, I want to know what cutlery to use, or what those goddamn french words mean, you know. It’s embarrassing - for me - to be so obviously misplaced…”

“Shit, don’t I know it…”, Beanie shakes her head. “What? You know I grew up on the other side. First time Minnie took me to a corporate event...he called it “a party”, so you know I rolled up in my shortest sequin number and my highest glitter heels… Shit, the looks I got!”, she wheezes.

“Those stiffs must’ve thought you were the entertainment!”

“Hey! But you’re right. I tell you, Minnie didn’t get any for a week.”

After wiping her tears Beanie gets serious again:

“I’m sorry, alright? Only looking out for you. But who knows...soon I might be looking for a maid of honour attire”, she smirks.

You cross your fingers and smile back.

¤¤

“I’ll be a happy man the day I don’t have to read the name Seung Inc. again”, Baekhyun sighs and slumps down on the couch, lifting your head to rest on his thigh.

“Settlement getting the better of you?”

“Their stupidity might”, he chuckles, giving you a kiss. “I’ll take Ga’ round the block before bed.”

“No, I can do it.”

“I could use some fresh air. And your overdramatic drama starts soon, doesn’t it?”

“It’s a perfectly lifelike show, Baekhyun. What, you mean your boss doesn’t slap you cross the face?”, you giggle, remembering his disbelief at the scene.

“No, but I might slap him one of these days. Come on Ga’”, he says, getting up and patting his thigh. “Gawa, come here.”

Gawa doesn’t move, so you nudge him off of the couch:

“Go!”

“Why do I always have to call that dog three times?”, Baekhyun shakes his head.

“What that dog thinks is anyone’s guess. He probably likes the way you say his name. Don’t forget-”

“Bags. I know.”

Feeling a little antsy you busy yourself with a bit of tidying up in the kitchen, emptying the dishwasher, wiping the counters and the like. There’s really no need, as you’ve already done it, but it’s something to do while waiting for Baekhyun to come back, for him to go to bed. “Take it easy. It’s just a search, what’s gonna happen? Nothing. It’s not true, so nothing.”

When he’s finally tucked in you bring in his water bottle - which he always forgets - and put it on the nightstand.

“Thanks.”

“All set?”

“Beyond all set…”

“Mm, I can see you won’t need a bedtime story to fall asleep”, you say, running your fingers through his hair.

“Depends…”, he says, seemingly half asleep. “Depends on the story”, he smiles, guiding your hand downwards.

You pull it away. When he doesn’t even bother opening his eyes you know he wasn’t serious anyway, so you turn off the light and say goodnight, closing the door behind you.

¤¤

Finishing your show you mute the TV and sit still for a while, making sure you can’t hear any sound except Gawa’s snoozing. “Let’s just do this.” You grab your computer and start reading. You’re relieved to find you can’t relate to most of the things you read, but once in a while the text makes you stop;

Patronizing; one month:

Going through your phone Baekhyun had laughed when you suggested he wouldn’t like finding you going through his. “Go ahead. But I doubt you’d be able to discern anything.”

“What, ‘cus I’m not a corporate lawyer suddenly I’m dumb..?”

“No...But put it this way. Since I am a lawyer I know certain things. But you know things I don’t, sweetie. Like scanning barcodes, or working a cash register. That’s more your thing”, he had smiled.

You had definitely felt some kind of way about the conversation. But seeing as he’d already said he wasn’t calling you dumb you didn’t find the words to approach it without it seeming like you were picking a fight.

“Joking”: Two months:

“Baekhyun, I don’t think this is my size. Why’d you cut the label off?”

“It was huge. I knew you’d do it anyway. Maybe you’ve gained weight…”, he said, chuckling at how the fabric cut into your waist.

You knew you hadn’t, and comparing it to your other trousers, the one he bought was definitely smaller.

Monitoring your whereabouts: three months:

Stacking condiments on the shelf at work you’d seen him coming down the aisle; a lovely surprise in the middle of a long shift. “Hi..! What are you doing here?”

“You weren’t answering your phone, just wanted to see you’re okay.”

“I don’t have it on me, you know that.”

“Okay, you got me. I was gonna pretend I wanted snacks, but really I missed you.”

You had found it adorable that he’d gotten into the car just to see you. But had he maybe done it to see if your text was true - if you were really covering a shift for a sick coworker?

“Sweetie…”

Drunk with sleep you rub your eyes. Baekhyun is kneeling next to the couch, the white light from your laptop making him an angelic figure in the otherwise dark room.

“Oh”, you scrunch your face. “I must’ve fallen asleep…”

“You must have”, he says, brushing your hair behind your ear. “Who’s being abused?”

You jerk, suddenly fully awake, and look at your screen: “Signs to look out for”. You scramble to sit up and close the web browser.

“No, Beanie just-”

“Minnie’s abusing Beanie?”

“No. Someone in her mom circle...she thought maybe. I don’t know…” You know it’s impossible Baekhyun doesn’t hear the lie, but he doesn’t let on. “I just thought I’d see if there’s anything she could look...out for, you know. She’s busy with the baby and all...”, you shrug your shoulders, trying to brush it off as nothing special.

“If she’s that busy maybe she shouldn’t put her nose in other people’s business”, he says, cocking his head.

There’s an almost undetectable smile on his lips which sends a shiver through your body.

“It’s not like that, she-”

“Come to bed”, he says getting up on his feet.

“I... Come on, Gawa.”

“No, he stays. I don’t want him in the room.”

There’s something distinctly different in how his shoulders look as he walks away. Something that makes you drag out your visit to the bathroom, hoping he’ll be asleep by the time you’re done. Tiptoeing into your room you breathe a sigh of relief, until you get into bed and he immediately rolls over to hug you. Any other day this would’ve been nothing less than what you expected - and wanted - but now all you can think of is how fast your heart is beating, and whether he can feel it or not. And Beanie…“What if he asks her? I can’t tell her to lie for me, then I’d have to explain why I did it in the first place…” But your thoughts are interrupted when Baekhyun exhales loudly into your neck and pulls your body closer, easing you out of your underwear.

¤¤

Cutting the alarm at 08.15 you sit up to find the bed empty. Well, empty of Baekhyun. He’d let the door stay open for Gawa to jump into bed, as he is now halfheartedly wagging his tail, looking at you. The fact that he’s not already in your face, vying for your attention means Baekhyun has both walked and fed him. And that means he’s not angry with you about last night.

“Ay, ay”, you sigh getting out of bed, tying your robe tightly. “Maybe I should cut back even more on my hours like he wants. Whaddya say, Ga’? Staying home watching dramas all day, wouldn’t that be something?”

Shuffling out to the kitchen you see a note on the counter: “I’m meeting Seung Inc.redible ass for dinner. Home early, call me if you want take out.” Baekhyun always ends his notes with a star. Never a heart, or a smiley, but a star. Today it makes you pause, mulling last night over in your head. Not so much thinking as feeling. “Sweetie…” Nothing had happened, yet deep down you know something had. But since it is deep down you swat it away with ease, going about your day as planned.

Coming back to your apartment to find half of your plants either dead or hanging on to life by a thread was the twig that broke the back of your dubble home lifestyle. The surfaces being covered in dust and your clothes smelling stuffy was just icing on said broken back.

“...and cleaning up feels like a waste since I’ll be gone and the same thing’s gonna happen..”, you complain over the phone to Baekhyun.

“Sweetie..? Are you asking me if you can move in with me..?”, Baekhyun says at the other end. You can tell he has a smile on his face.

“Wha-no… I’m not”, you laugh, suddenly realising that’s exactly what it sounds like. “I was just venting.”

“So you don’t wanna move in with me?”

If you say yes it will really seem as if you were fishing, so you just stare at the phone.

“You there…?”

“Yeah, I just… Are you really asking?”

“Yes…”

What you want to do is swing from your lamp like it’s a merry-go-round and scream, but you keep it cool, clearing your throat.

“Well, it’s a pretty big decision. Of course I’d say yes, but I have to confer with my associate.”

“This associate of yours, does it happen to be a big furry thing who is probably lying next to you, listening in..?”

“Maybe…”

“Mr. Gawa, I’m gonna make you an offer you can’t refuse.”

“Baekhyun! I’ve seen that movie - it’s not a good offer..!”, you holler.

“Okay, okay”, he laughs. “My offer is love. Good enough?”

You scrunch your face and smother a yelp of delight.

“Good enough, Baekhyun…”

“Great”, he huffs. “Typical Seung, calling to rain on my happy moment… You’ll come home tonight then?”

“My first night as the lady of the manor, wouldn’t miss it. Go easy on him..! Love you.”

“Love you. Bye.”

You sit in disbelief for a moment. Did an everyday phone call with Baekhyun just end in you moving in with him? A dozen unfinished thoughts goes through your mind; giving up the apartment seems daunting somehow; what do I do with all my stuff; does he have room for what I wanna bring..? But it is mostly happy thoughts painted in pink.

“Hope this puts an end to the tiffs we’ve had lately. Brings it back to how it was before”, you sigh. “Look alive, Gawa - you’re moving up in the world..!”, you say, wrestling with him for a bit.

¤¤

“Agh!”, you huff, kicking your shoes off in the hallway and dropping your bag on the floor.

Baekhyun, for once home earlier than you, gives you a curious look from the sofa.

“Rough day?”

“My car won’t start..!”

“How’d you get home?”

“It was fine, but when I turned the ignition off my headlights wouldn’t go out, so I was gonna do it again, but it wouldn’t start. I’ve been sitting in the parking lot for fifteen minutes revving the engine like Wacky Races..! I had to cut the battery ‘cus of the lights”, you complain, slumping down next to him with your head in his lap. “I was so angry I almost forgot Ga’ in the car. Ahh, that fucking car, Baekhyun..!”, you laugh desperately.

“You gonna leave it at the shop?”

“I can’t afford it right now. Not again.”

“Don’t be silly, I’ll pay for it.”

“I don’t want you to. I’ll take the bus.”

“What’s a bus?”, Baekhyun frowns, choking a smile.

You roll your eyes at him and shake your head, as if you don’t think him playing with high class manners is funny.

“Wait, I wanna lie down”, he says, stretching out on the couch with you as his blanket.

“I’ll give you money for the cab tomorrow”, he says, kissing your hand.

“There’s no cab. I’m taking the bus. But thank you.”

“Some start to being the lady of the manor… Speaking of which, did you give your… How many months is the notice...?”

“Three. No, I…”, you pause.

Baekhyun shakes his head a little, a question.

“I thought you might wanna talk it over.”

“We already did..? You having second thoughts?”

“Of course not..! It was just in case, since I was whining about it, maybe you asked...on the spur of the moment, kinda?”

His honeyed laughter rings in your ears.

“You think I’d ask you to move in on the spur of the moment?”

“Well, no...when you say it like that it sounds different..!”

“ Ah, what to do with you, sweetie”, he sighs. “You wanna have a party maybe?”

“A party?”

“Not a rave, but invite a few people, you know.”

“Hm...eh, I hadn’t...hm, okay.”

“We don’t have to.”

“No, I just hadn’t thought about it. It’ll be fun, let’s do it. Wait, I don’t even know - do you have a storage room in the building? If my stuff can fit there or whether I should rent something?”

“You’re bringing your things here, aren’t you?”

“I mean the big things, my furniture and…”

“You don’t need them anymore, just throw them out? Or are you planning on leaving me..?”, Baekhyun teases.

“Nooo. But I spent money on them, I don’t wanna just chuck ‘em out.”

“It’s stupid, but do as you wish”, he sighs.

“It’s not. Humour me. For a while at least.”

In these mundane things is where your heart is, feeling Baekhyun’s breathing and warmth through his thin t-shirt while he watches the news, lightly scratching the nape of your neck, but otherwise paying no particular attention to you.

¤¤

Even though you at first hadn’t a thought of having a moving-in party, the thought really grew on you, and you decided to throw something together. It was all rather ad-hoc: drinks, ramyun, games, a few shiny balloons you’d gotten from work and a dozen guests. Most of them were from Baekhyun’s office, but that didn’t matter, you knew and liked them well enough. Oddly enough, Beanie hadn’t gotten back to you today. You knew she was coming, she’d been too excited about the news not to, but you couldn’t get a hold of her now. You’d been checking your phone so often it was borderline rude, so you’d left it in the kitchen for some peace of mind, but now hearing your ringtone you excuse yourself and dash to get it. It’s not her.

“Hey, I forgot the code to the gate..?”

“Didn’t I send you a text with it?”

“Oh… I forgot that to..! Sorry, be right up.”

Without being unappreciative of the friends that are here you can’t help missing the one who isn’t. You could probably drink and laugh away the night with anyone of these people, but with Beanie it’s different. You don’t know if it’s because both of you are from “the other side of the tracks” and somehow ended up in fancy places, but you do know your connection with her was instant, like meeting your twin from another lifetime. You know her word is her bond and that’s why her silence unnerves you.

“Problem?”

A little startled, you spin around to see Baekhyun.

“Nah, just Katy asking for the code.”

“Really..?”, he frowns. “You seem a bit…”

“I thought it might be Bean…”, you shrug your shoulders. “Can you try Minnie, please?”

“He’s out of town on business”, Baekhyun replies casually.

“What?”

“He had to go, sweetie.”

“Had to go? Don’t you decide that?”

“What’s your point?”

“Well… Why didn’t you tell me?”

Baekhyun cocks his head to the side. It makes your chest tighten.

“You want me to ask you how to do my job?”

“Of course not”, you say, deflated. “I’m just disappointed.”

“Well, you have guests in the other room. Maybe you should think more about them instead of sitting in here having a tantrum over someone who doesn’t even answer your calls. Shouldn’t you?”

You don’t want to let Baekhyun off the hook for not telling you about Min, but you know it wouldn’t make a difference if you continued.

“I just don’t get why Beanie’s not picking up… What if something’s wrong?”

“She has a kid, she’s probably busy. And at this hour”, he says, looking at his watch “...she probably has her phone on mute. Come on now. I spent a lot of money on this, you don’t wanna ruin it for everyone, do you?”

Letting his words sink in, logic and guilt alike, you come to terms with the situation and realise that you really don’t want to ruin it for everyone, or yourself. You shake your head with a crooked smile.

“That’s my girl. No more pouting”, Baekhyun says, with a light poke on your nose.

Getting into bed you look through your phone one last time; check the call log and text messages, in case you’ve somehow clicked Beanie away, but there’s nothing there. Now, with not so little alcohol in your system you don’t worry about her being okay, but about your friendship. Had you done something wrong? Or rather, did she think you had; had she misunderstood something maybe? You try to put it out of your mind, but it sits like a little pebble in your gut, only given a break by Baekhyun.

“Thank god they’re gone..!”, he exclaims, dragging you on top of him.

“You talked the most, drank the most-”

“I was trying to scare them away”, he laughs between kisses. “Every fucking time you moved on the couch I imagined it was me under there… Now be a good girl and ride me, sweetie.”

¤¤

As you hadn’t been able to get a hold of Beanie the following couple of days you had made up your mind to go to her and Minnie’s home - one of these days. Deciding to do something and having the courage to do it can be two very different things, and it fell on divine intervention to push you forward.

Waiting for Baekhyun to pick you up from the mall you spot Minnie walking across the parking lot.

“Min..!”, you shout, zig-zagging your way through the parked cars.

He smiles when he spots you, but you detect a degree of discomfort in it.

“Oh, hi. What are you doing here?”

“I’ve been to lunch with my mom, just waiting for Baekhyun to pick me up.”

“Lunch date with mom, that’s nice. I haven’t seen you in a while, how are you?”, he asks, as he starts for his car again.

“I’m good. You?”

“I’m good, just came back from out of town-”

“Yeah”, you interrupt. “That’s actually what I wanted to ask you about… Is Beanie alright? She didn’t come to my party and I can’t get a hold of her.”

“Yeah, she’s fine. You know how it is, busy with the baby and all… She probably just forgot.”

Even with his face turned away as he’s putting his bags in the trunk you can tell he’s not being honest. You’re not sure if you want to know why though. You study his face as he rounds the car to the driver’s door - he’s clearly uncomfortable, trying to force a normal demeanour, so you press him on it.

“But I don’t think she’d forget about it. Or not get in touch on her own - we talk almost every day, Min.”

“Shit...”, he says, fidgeting with the keys. “I asked her not to go, okay. To keep a little distance for a while.”

“From me? Why? I thought we were-”

“No, it’s…”

They way he’s frowning and struggling with his words you know why.

“Baekhyun asked me to”, he finishes, holding his hands up in defeat.

“What, no. You must’ve misunderstood, Min”, you say, not wanting to let on what you’re really thinking. “Why would he?”

“He didn’t say, he just… Aeh, you know what? Maybe I did misunderstand him. Talk to him when you see him, it’s probably nothing”, he says, getting into the car.

“Yeah, I’ll tell him you ruined my party over nothing”, you chuckle. “Tell Bean to answer next time, alright?”

“Will do. See you around?”

“See ya”, you say, waving him off.

You spend the few minutes you have left to wait wondering - fearing - why Baekhyun would ask such a thing of Minnie. Actually, you’re not wondering at all - you know why. But if that’s the case what does it mean? Why wouldn’t he sit down with you and have a conversation about it like an adult? Why would he essentially order Min to keep her away? He must know what it looks like… And what would Beanie think it looks like? What the hell are you gonna tell her when you see her again? “If you see her, you mean? I will see her.” You promise yourself you won’t let Baekhyun get away with this, that you’re gonna have a proper talk about it. But your resolve gets a nick as soon as you get in the car, for a moment pretending that it might just be a misunderstanding…

“How’s your mom?”

“You know, same old, same old.”

“Nothing new on the westfront..?”, he smiles at you and takes your hand.

“Not much. But I saw Min. Bumped into him, I mean. Just now.”

You can’t tell if you sound casual. When Baekhyun tightens his grip on your hand you definitely feel less than casual.

“Hm. Beanie?”

“No, it was just him. He-”

“So what’d he say?”, he asks, keeping his eyes on the road.

This is your in, but you’re not as brave as you were five minutes ago. If you bring it up you can’t unsay it and everything that follows will be your doing; do you want to spend a wonderful evening with your man or do you want to walk around on glass shards?

“Beanie thinks you don’t like her…”

He spares you a quick glance with a furrowed brow.

“He said that?”

“Not exactly. He said, eh, I don’t wanna be a tattle tale...”

“What are you, ten years old?”, he scoffs. “We can talk about it when we get home”, he continues and lets go of your hand.

It’s sickening, the darkness that emanates from him. Even shifting in your seat to look out the window you feel like a bother to him. You don’t want to “talk about it”, you want to shout at him for trying to decide who your friends are, and for cutting you off. But you also wanna sweep it under the rug, beg his forgiveness with your saddest eyes and let him know he’s more important than anyone else.

¤¤

From the garage to the elevator to the hallway, every step feels like you're walking closer to springing a bear trap you set for yourself.

“You’re hovering...”, Baekhyun notes when you stand by the kitchen island, watching him scroll through his phone.

“Well, you said...we were gonna talk…”

“What’s there to talk about?”

You look at him, dumbfounded, until he puts away his phone and raises a questioning eyebrow.

“Minnie. Did you say anything to him about Beanie? I’m hoping it’s a misun-”

“That he should keep her away? Yeah.”

“Why would you do that? She’s my friend!”

“Don’t raise your voice at me.”

“Baekhyun…”

You try to find the right words as your eyes start burning, but end up throwing your hands up in defeat.

“She’s my friend…”

“Sweetie”, he says, coming up to you, looking down at you. “I’ve known her longer than you, I think I know what’s best.”

“I can take care of myself. Make my own decisions.”

“Sure you can. But I’m the one who moved you from a tiny apartment to a skyrise flat, no?”, he chuckles.

You know he sometimes has a tendency to poke fun at you, but this was different. Going from letting you know it doesn’t matter what your paycheck says to making sure you know it does - the audacity doesn’t make you angry, it hurts you.

“Why do you have to put me down? Like in the car, when you called me ten..”

“What am I supposed to do with you when you act like this then?” Pausing, seemingly drawing pleasure from your expression he continues in a softer tone, putting his arms around you “I was only kidding, you’re too sensitive, sweetie.”

“I guess I am...”, you whisper, knowing you can’t make him listen anyway. “I’m gonna take Ga’ out.”

Giving Baekhyun the silent treatment doesn’t work. He sees through it, thinks it’s childish and wants no part of it. Besides, he’s better at it than you are; making some calls, working in his home office, reading the paper while seemingly not noticing your silent rebellion. After a while the TV and Gawa can’t keep your fearful thoughts away, the ones where he decides you’re no fun anymore. The clock is creeping closer to dinner time and that’ll be make or break as you see it - making up and eating together or eating alone and making a bad situation worse. You don’t want to give up even more of your pride, but his silence won’t stop any other way. “And besides, a relationship is about diplomacy. Sometimes you have to let the other person win.. It’s normal.”

You walk past his study and the kitchen to find him lying in bed with his phone. Quiet as a mouse you sit down on your end, suddenly scared it won’t work, that he’ll brush away your attempt at reconciliation like so many bread crumbs from the mattress. “Do I beg?” A part of you is disgusted with yourself because you know he’s waiting for you to crawl back. He doesn’t look at you when you turn around to face him, but oh, he’s waiting alright. Shuffling up next to him you cautiously lower yourself down, hoping he’ll let you in. When he moves his arm for you to lay down, putting it around you when you have, the release you feel is immeasurable. Winning or losing isn’t so important. Baekhyun is. He runs his hand over your hair, eyes still fixed on the phone, you stretch your arm out, tucking your fingers beneath his shirt to feel his warm torso. That other stuff may be important, but not right now.

¤¤

“Dear Diary in my head… Why didn’t I say anything? I’m not afraid of him, so why was I afraid to? I was lazy ‘cus I didn’t wanna go on with the fight. But I’m not a fucking school girl wanting a boy’s approval, so I should’ve insisted. Now it sounds pathetic, “I should’ve insisted I be allowed to see Beanie”, like he’s my dad - shit, that’s what Beanie said… I AM allowed to see her, goddamn it, and I will, I don’t care. He’s the one being unreasonable - as if I love every single one of his friends..! If that article is what he's mad about it doesn't even make sense, ‘cus he’s not like that. But what if he is...like that rumour she was talking about… Jesus CHRIST, I’d know if he was! Now I’m just winding myself up ‘cus I’m irritated, stop it. I know how he is; hot headed in the moment, but forgets about it quickly. I mean what, he’s gonna hate on his colleagues wife forever? Ah-ah, he’ll get over it. And I need to stop being such a pushover when we argue, that’s for damn sure…”

¤¤

“How many times have you seen her?”, Baekhyun asks coldly, holding up your phone.

You hadn’t, as you first thought, forgot to take it with you to the bedroom last night - he’d taken it before you woke up. There’s no room for you to come up with a lie, white or other. Actually, this time there’s not even room for your dread as you immediately get pissed off at him for taking it.

“I didn’t opt out of having a password for you to go through my phone”, you say sternly, going to retrieve it from him. When he moves you fix your eyes on him “Baekhyun..!”

“How many times?”

“A few times. She’s my friend, and I missed her. I know y-”

“A few times?”

There’s a glint in his eye that makes you unsettled so you make like you’re starting breakfast, with him following you.

“What do you talk about?”

“Nothing. This and that…”

“For example..?”

“I don’t keep a log, do I?”, you mumble sarcastically, more to yourself than him.

Before you have time to react he's grabbed your arm, making your head bounce against the wall.

"What did you just say?", he spits in your face, but seeing how you cower, eyes locked on his hand hanging in the air, he remembers himself. "So fucking dumb", he hisses, releasing his grip on you with a shove to the side.

Toppling over, trying to compose yourself you see him snatching his blazer from his seat before leaving.

In an instant Baekhyun has made you so small you feel that the chairs, table and island are all towering up around you where you sit on the floor. Your eyes are fixed on the door, terrified you’re going to see the lock turn open. You won’t hear it through the piercing sound in your ears. “He was gonna hit me…” Understanding he’s not coming back you stand up, bracing yourself against the wall. What now? You look around aimlessly, not even realising you’re clutching your arm, until you see your phone on the counter. Like a bolt the obvious answer hits you: “You can’t stay.” Hurrying to the closet you grab one of Baekhyun’s overnight bags - he won’t miss it - and open the drawers, grabbing a handful of everything and stuffing them in it; tearing clothes off their racks, making the hangers fall to the floor with a clank and sweep toiletries in with one movement. Lacing up your shoes your heart threatens to break your chest in half. You repeatedly call Gawa, then remember your mom’s had him a few nights.

“Where’s my...” You look around for your jacket in a fever, unable to focus.

“Did he take my jacket? My keys...no...”, you think even though you’re certain you never saw him with it.

“Ah!”

Running to your room you breathe a sigh of relief when you see it hanging on a chair; putting it on you check your pockets to see everything’s there and *qo...*. You freeze. Was that the bolt sliding? Not hearing any other sounds you slide your phone open, ready to call whomever, leaving sweat marks over the screen, and inch your way out to the dining room.

“Baekhyun..?”

Your bag is right there. If he’s somehow managed to come in without you hearing it, he’s seen it, and with the open floor plan the only doors in the apartment are on the bathroom, office and walk-in closet - all situated round the entrance. You can’t lock yourself in. Your gut churns as you expect him to round the corner with his head to the side - the way it always is when he disapproves of something. Feeling like he’s toying with you, you give way to despondency, wiping your tears before you keep walking and turn the corner. But he’s not there. The door is locked. You sink down on wobbly legs, catching your breath. Grabbing your bag you hear that sound again, and realise it was just a glass bottle in the bag settling, knocking against another one.

“Fuck! Jesus Christ…”

Sitting down you start thinking about where to go. In the back of your head you’d assumed your mom’s place, but now you see there are only two ways that could go: you don’t tell her why, so she’ll invite Baekhyun in when he comes looking or you do tell her and she’ll insist you report him to the police. But what’s there to report? “He DIDN’T hit me. He grabbed your arm! Yeah, he grabbed my arm in a fight when he found out I’d been lying to him… They won’t do anything…”

“Why did I lie to him..! None of this would've happened if I’d been honest, just told him the first time I saw her. And if I hadn’t acted like that when he asked… Of course he'd be angry, anyone would. Being angry is one thing, punching someone is different. But he didn't… I mean, haven't I been so annoyed I've wanted to hit him? It's not the same thing! Why not? Because he happens to be stronger than me? It's still violence...You KNOW why it isn't… If he HAD, sure, I'd never let him near me again, but he didn’t. He wouldn’t… He wouldn’t.”

Going back and forth with yourself in your head was just a formality and a way to convince yourself you're the type of person that 1: won't tolerate being treated like shit, and 2: would give someone a second chance. “Everyone deserves a second chance. At least a chance to explain themselves.”

Putting your things back you make sure they are exactly as they had been, while ignoring the voice that asks why you’re worried he might be able to tell a difference. Now there’s nothing left to do but somehow pass the excruciatingly long hours until he gets off work...

¤¤

Not hearing from Baekhyun all day had you go from thinking he’d been wrong to fearing he’d still think you were.

If you can forgive him then surely he can forgive you, right? If he’s still angry, you’ll make an effort; if he doesn't say anything about it, neither will you. You’ll go on as usual, have a visit with your mom, be fine.

Standing in front of the mirror in your closet, trying to figure out what top to wear has a different feeling to it today; you're trying to cover up your arm. There isn't any bruising on it as far as you can tell, but you never know… When the lock turns your pulse goes up. You’ve been anxiety ridden all day, as well as longing for him to come home, so you can really put this thing past you and go back to normal.

He peeks in through the door with a gentle smile and presents a bouquet - yellow peonies.

"I think roses are the official flower of apology, but I know how you love these."

“He’s not mad, thank God, he’s not mad…”

"I don't know what came over me”, he starts, coming up to you. “It must be all the stress at work, with the buy-out and I… I would never hurt you! When I saw that look in your eyes I couldn’t believe what I was doing-”

“Why didn’t you call me all day?”, you ask, teary-eyed with relief.

“I wanted to, sweetie, but I...every time I picked up the phone I saw that look and I didn’t know what to say… I’ll never hurt you again, I swear.”

“You real...really scared me”, you manage to say through choppy breaths.

“I know. I’ll do whatever you want, give you anything you want”, he says, hugging you tightly “...just forgive me.”

You don’t take pleasure in seeing him distraught, but note that suddenly the roles are reversed - he’s the one pleading, and you have the power to lift him up.

“You have to promise me, Baekhyun.”

“I promise, sweetie. I promise..!”

He tips your head up by the chin:

“You believe me, right?"

With such sincerity in his eyes and tremble in his voice, how could you not?

“Good”, he says when you nod, giving you your long awaited kiss. “I’m so sorry…”

“Let’s...”, you exhale deeply, turning to the mirror again.“Let’s not talk about it anymore, okay?”

“Sure. What are you up to?”

“I'm just deciding what to wear. We have to be at my mum's in forty-five minutes, so if you're gonna shower before we go…”

Coming up to stand behind you in the mirror, the way he puts his hands on your shoulders makes you wince, if ever so slightly. But he doesn't notice.

"Do you really think it's a good idea for us to go over there today? I think we could really need this time for ourselves. Don't you agree?"

"But I've already told her we're coming over…"

"I know, but with everything that's been going on… Tell you what...You go put these in water and I'll give her a call, tell her I've got a migraine."

"I have to get Gawa, she's had him four days already", you say, happy to have found a good reason for going over.

"She won't mind will she?", he asks, spinning you around to look you in the eyes. "Aren't I as important as him? I've really missed you today, sweetie."

You don't want to upset him again, and you've really missed him too. So you give in.

Curled up on the sofa with your head on Baekhyun's chest, his fingers are playing with your hair.

"Sweetie? Have you thought about maybe letting your mum have Gawa?"

"Have him? Past tomorrow?"

"Keep him. For good, I mean."

"What? No, why?"

"Don't get upset", he says soothing you. "I don't mean he can't come over from time to time."

A sickening feeling creeps into your heart, but not wanting to risk another fight so soon you hold your tongue. Nonchalantly flipping through the channels on the TV he adds:

"We don't have to decide anything now. It's just...something to think about."

¤¤

Drying your hands after finishing up the dishes at your mom's you hear Baekhyun from the living room:

"... to have him full time."

Your stomach's in knots as you join them. Baekhyun smiles and grabs your hand.

"I was just telling your mom how we think she should keep Gawa - if you want to, of course", he adds thoughtfully, looking at your mom.

"But he's your everything, honey", your mom, correctly, points out. "Why would you ev-"

She cuts herself off with eyes growing wide.

"Are you pregnant..!? Oh, oh..!", she blurts out before you can stop her.

"No!"

Baekhyun bursts out laughing, pulling you to sit on his lap.

"Not yet, mother. But who knows, might not be too long before you hear the tapping of little feet around here…", he jokes.

At least you hope he is. Not feeling entirely comfortable with the turn the conversation has taken, you get up, calling Gawa to you.

"Well, I guess we should be going, mom. Come on, Baekhyun, Ga'."

There's a flicker in Baekhyun's eyes, but you know he won't make a scene in front of your mom.

"We'll give you some time to think about it", he says, hugging her goodbye.

You can feel the cold emanating from him like dry ice in the elevator.

"I'll drop you off at home before I head into the office", he says, clearing his throat.

"It's Saturday, you're off."

"I might as well get some work done if you don't want to be with me. If you choose that animal over me."

¤¤

Forty-eight hours ago you had been looking forward to the weekend; visiting your mom with your handsome, successful boyfriend and winding down with the love of your life - Gawa. But nothing had gone the way you had imagined. Even after the incident it was as if Baekhyun hadn't let go of your arm, keeping you under his eye and forcing you to prove your loyalty to him. But then again, you had just been through something big, however short it was. It was only natural he'd want a little more attention from you than normal, right? He probably didn't mean for you to give Gawa up for good, it was just bad wording. He loved seeing you happy, why else would he buy you flowers and jewellery, insist that you cut back your hours at work to be home more, call you every other hour to say hi?

Thinking about it in those terms made it simple - if not easy - for you to do what he wanted. Because he was what you wanted, wasn't he? So, not having told him you were returning Gawa to your mom the same day you were waiting for him to come back home. What had started as excitement about pleasing him had, as the hours passed, turned into a tremendously guilty conscience and now, lying in bed as he approaches, you can't even pretend to be happy.

"Why is it so dark in here?", he asks, throwing his blazer on the bed. "Where's Ga'? Gawa..!", he calls.

"He's not here", you answer him, your back still turned against him. "He's with mom…"

"Oh, sweetie", he sighs, laying down behind you, giving you a kiss on the neck. "I didn't mean for you to take him back today. Turn around, let me see that pretty face. That's better", he says, brushing the hair out of your eyes.

"My red eyes and runny nose is better?", you pout, partly fishing for a compliment.

"Mm-hm. Of course I don't like to see you sad, but I really appreciate what you've done. It shows that you respect me. That you really care about me."

Little by little his words push away your melancholy. The way he's looking at you now, with his gentle brown eyes and sweet smile, prickles your skin. This is the reaction you had wanted from him.

"And besides…", he continues, slipping his hand under your t-shirt "I've been thinking about what your mother said… About a baby."

"No. Baekhyun, that's insane. That’s…"

"Why? Too soon? Who decides that? Look...", he says, nudging your t-shirt up to show your stomach "...can't you imagine a little Baekhyun growing in here? Or my daughter? Walking in the park with the stroller, showing the baby to everyone at work… I’d show you off to everyone the minute I found out."

“Aeh..”, you swat your hand as he gets up, but when he’s out of the room you scrunch your face with delight at the thought of it. Somehow you can see it. But in your stomach isn't just the butterflies of an imagined little life - it’s the whispered knowledge that you've left the right love behind.

#baekhyun #baekhyun angst #baekhyun scenario

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mycelier · 4 years

Text

My name is Simone and I would like to tell you a tale!

I will not have access to my laptop for some days more and because writing on my phone is kind of painful (physically, because I am working on hand mobility now), this may end up in drafts and taking a while to post. I am going to share what has been happening the last 2 months because I feel like everything went from 0 to 100 in the span of a few weeks and its been really, really wild.

So!!! LETTUCE begin!

For roughly 5 years I've been struggling to get a diagnosis on an extremely painful area of my arm. There was literally nothing visible; no lump, discoloration or any other physical abnormality to indicate anything was wrong. I spent thousands on pretty much every kind of imaging you can do, and was told time and time again that there was nothing wrong and, perhaps, it was psychosomatic and I needed therapy or, more often than not, I was given a shrug and a vague "i dunno" response.

This year, something changed. I deal with chronic pain (my spine is congenitally fused in my neck and lower spine and I have baby bone spurs all over), and in the process of trying to work on that I brought up my arm again to a dr I no longer see. He'd told me my arm was SEVERAL things over the years I had been seeing him but this time said it was a fibromyalgia knot, something I had been told by a team of doctors some time before that. I said okay cool and was sent to a physical therapy rehab center where the dr worked with myofascial release and stretches to help with injuries. This amazing man fixed my plantar fasciitis and helped get my chronic headaches under control but NOTHING we did helped my arm pain. Within a month he was worried bc we had started to notice that there was a hardness to the spot that never changed with any exercise or massage.

Worried that there was a nerve being trapped or crushed (another diagnosis I'd gotten over the years), this amazing man sent me to a neurosurgeon who immediately frowned and said he didn't think my neck pain and my arm pain were connected. He ordered an MRI of my arm and despite it not being visible on an MRI 2 years before, he found something PHYSICALLY THERE where I said I had pain. He considered doing the surgery to remove it (despite being a neurosurgeon he was fascinated with this weird horribly painful spot) but eventually sent me a surgeon for an oncology center, assuring me it was because this new surgeon was one of the best in Texas for removing soft tissue tumors, not because there was any thought of cancer.

I met with the surgeon who gave me one more diagnosis of an AVM (arteriovenous malformation), snd said they were benign and not necessary to remove as well as the possibility that if removed it would likely return. Truly, at this point after 5 years of constant nauseating horric pain when someone brushed against me or if I gently brushed against ANYRHING, a pain so bad that it had basically made me stop using my right arm as much as possible (of course I'm right handed lol), I said GET THAT FUCKER OUT OF THERE MAN and my first surgery was scheduled.

Surgery one occurred Nov 5th and was an out patient event. I went home and passed out. At some point my mom said that while I'd been in recovery the dr said the thing in my arm hadn't looked like what he expected so he had sent it to pathology. I went back to work and was hanging out until the Tuesday before Thanksgiving when I went in for a super immediate meeting with a different doctor who told me that what had been in my arm was a synovial sarcoma, aka, cancer! He, this incredibly kind man I did not know, gently discussed chemo and told me I needed to have a CT scan immediately. Based on the CT, i was either in stage one or stage four if it has spread to lungs. The day before Thanksgiving I received the news that it was stage one, it had not spread, and i was so fucking happy.

Then it was time talk about next steps. My surgeon marked out a circle on my arm to indicate how much he was gonna remove in order to guarantee clear margins..but it was not enough of a meeting for me to grasp the surgery I was about to receive.

The day of my second surgery, dec 8th, came quickly and i met with the plastic surgeon, the kindest, most patient man. He moved my arm around and explained how he was going to hijack a vein from my forearm in order to keep the blood flow health to the flap he was gonna take from the donor site: My inner thigh.

It has been 11 days and I am living in an inpatient rehab facility, working on dealing with the nerve damage/pain, the EXTREME pain of my donor site, and the lost mobility that I am working on getting back, both in my leg and my hand. The majorities of my arm is numb...except where the nerve pain burns my wrist and forearm and makes it painful to wear my arm sling (I can't fully extend my arm, nor can I lift, push, pull or use my arm in any way that would stress out my new arm flap). Also may have a brand new urinary tract infection but as I write this I'm chugging water for a urine sample to hopefully get that treated. Below are some pictures I have taken/had taken of my arm! Im not ready to look at my leg outside of the bandages (which, since having the wound vac removed today, hell yeah, will need daily dressing changes).

EDIT: I tried posting pictures of my arm last night and my post disappeared immediately so I will try to make a new post with these photos in case the whole post was erased because of them. I will tag them as post surgery photos. I do not consider them gory or excessive but hey that's just me.

I intend to post more things as I keep healing and as I gain more mobility. I was given "independence" in my room yesterday which means I can officially get up without any assistance needed (using my badass new cane to help me lift my foot in and out of bed)!!!! Which also means I can get up whenever I want without the bed alarm going off. I have a badass cane that has been the best tool in helping me get around (and has inspired my mom and others to suggest and look into getting me a cane sword which makes me laugh REAL hard). See below me using the cane to move my foot in and out of bed!

Part of why I'm posting this is because I really needed to talk about it and while later posts may not be this long or expository but I wanted to have a base post to explain other ones related to this one!!!

I will update with some newer pics tomorrow night when my mom comes by to help me take newer pics. The arm flap looks super healthy (according to the drs), and when they changed my leg dressing they said its looking really good and healthy!

I......also really wanted to post my Amazon wishlist. Due to this stupid wild bad lottery ticket, I've been struggling to pay my bills and rent but!!! I have good insurance, thankfully (since I live in the US and my hospital stay and this rehab stay would have more than bankrupted me), and im hoping my disability checks will get here in time for rent!!! I'm putting up my wishlist bc I can't afford some of the "essentials" on there and, also, because I havent been able to have any kind of comfort during any of this. I never ask for anything for holidays because usually i...dont want to burden people with spending money on me since I know how hard money is, especially right now. And if I don't have enough for rent later I might have to create a go fund me...but right now everything looks good for rent and bills just...not for anything fun.

Thank you so much for your time!!! And happy holidays you wild bastards!!!

https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/36PG6BAYD18U7?ref_=wl_share

#tw for many things!#cancer mention #surgery mention #i tried to add photos of my arm post surgery and my post disappeared so I will try again in a separate post #everything relating to my cancer or recovery i will label as badass battlestar bc it makes me feel cool #badass battlestar

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briandthemoon · 5 years

Photo

~ Uploading this WIP here too! ~ {You can see both on my deviantArt too [same username], but with some of the original ideas and thoughts.} So uh, I did what I do best and shoved two things I love and have been hyperfocusing on for the last month together: Sanders Sides and RWBY.

I’ve been binging @thatsthat24 ‘s Sanders Sides videos and fan comics for the last month or so and by god, it’s really lifted my mood. I’m gonna work to get them all lined and coloured soon, but since I’ll be travelling in the next week, I’ll likely have paper sketches and such to upload if I’m lucky.

As for this AU, say hello to Team RNBO [Rainbow]! This is what I have so far in terms of character information; [putting it under a readmore, please do have a look!]

Roman De La Rosa:

- Semblance: "Picture This" - the ability to conjure an item proportional to the positive emotions he alone is feeling. So the happier and more creative he feels, the better.

- Weapons: “Armas Y Rosas“, a gauntlet-gun [armas] and a rosen rapier sword [rosas]. It’s literally just a Guns N Roses joke.

Virgil Nightshade:

- Black Cat Faunus. I didn’t realise til too late how similar to Blake he is but honestly, idc, I love him.

- Semblance: "Panic Room" - the ability to conjure a small isolated, soundproof space to trap someone in. Including himself in times of distress.

- Weapons: “Atropa�� and “Solanum”, two knives with dust vials that attach to the end to infuse the metal. He usually uses Gravity Dust because 1) aesthetic and 2) if you have gravity defying Dust? Thats a cool escape my guy.

Logan Blu-Berrie:

- Semblance: “Blu-Screen of Death” - the ability to perform computer-esque functions via summons, i.e. attacking someone with a text box he just conjured, or browsing data and memories on a summoned screen for accuracy.

- Weapon: “Crofter”, a staff-spear that uses projection similar to Velvet’s weapon to form blades when needed. I.E. turning the staff into an axe or hammer or even forming a fishing line. [Looking at this whole thing, Logan wound up giving me big Scottish vibes in this AU and I’m SO for it.]

Patton Opal:

- Labrador Faunus, best boy 1000/10, didn’t have to re-work his design at all, what a madlad

- Semblance: "New Trick" - the ability to mark a person and be able to find them via a boosted scent marker. So far Roman smells like strawberries and creme, Virgil smells like smokey wood, and Logan smells like jam. And yes, Patton has tried tracking himself. He smells of vanilla cookies.

Weapon: “Storge”, a shield - axe combo. Mostly used in the shield position unless he’s forced to be active in a fight. Tried to give this weapon BIG Rose Quartz Shield Vibes.

Remus Pepinillo:

- for those wondering, he threw out the De La Rosa name when he left the family to go eat deoderants without judgement. And to go cause havoc.

- Semblance: “Can’t Be Unseen” - Similar to Roman’s semblance, Remus can conjure items but instead based upon other people’s negative emotions directed at him. So things like disgust and fear directed at him make him stronger.

- Weapon: “Asqueroso”, a mace that can be wielded in pole form or as a chain flail. The name literally is just the spanish for “Disgusting”.

“Deceit“:

- Python faunus. Pretty obvious there. As for a name, I’ll work with whatever becomes canon, tbh. His hat snake isn’t real, it’s just a design, but he has named his hat “Monty”.

- Semblance: “Trust in Me” - Deceit can mimic someone else’s voice to the point of being hypnotic in some cases.

- Weapon: “Kaa”, a microphone that can amplify sounds to use as ammo, or can be combined with dust vials for other effects, such as fire breathing or ice breath. This is absolutely where Virgil got the idea for his knives.

~~ Little Things In Their Designs Collectively~~

- So mostly Roman and Virgil had a revamp and got added or changed details. I’m personally loving the rose decals for Roman, and the fact that Virgil has to keep sewing his hoodie pocket sides back up because he keeps knee-jerk whipping out his knives and catching them on the sides. Also freckles. I cannot stress enough how much I needed to give one of these cute lil guys freckles.

- Logan and Patton really didn’t change much; Patton came out perfect the first time, and Logan just needed some proportion adjustments. Later I went and added friendship bracelets to each design because I do not believe for a second that Patton wouldn’t make them team bracelets. The card suit beads was just an addition that I added because I am the artist and none of you can stop me from adding the tiniest of references to Homestuck Quadrants.

- For Roman and Remus, I wanted them to have similar poses but good god, it was still hard to draw Remus’s hands. They look so good in the end though so I’m good with ‘em. I also might give him a little top hat or something at some point and see how it looks, I dunno.

- As for Deceit, I had a bit of trouble trying to pin down his design at first, but once I rolled with the allusions to Kaa from Jungle Book, it went far easier. I quite like that I added the poisonous needles in the bottom of his boots as a “sting in the tail” kind of thing.

- Talking about inspirations and such, Roman, Virgil, and Patton are pretty much just colour based; Roman being red roses [his name literally being Roman of the Rose] as a symbol of romance of course, with Virgil’s whole motif being Edgey and thus going with nightshade purple as his colour, and finally with Patton, his name took me the longest to work out, but Opal seemed to fit really well, and considering it represents Love and Loyalty? Come on, I had to.

- As for Logan, Deceit, and Remus, they all got more story links worked in somehow without me really realising. Logan was really unexpected, but between the Crofters’ Jam link and the blue colours, he gave me sort of Little Boy Blue vibes, and also via the name Logan being Scottish in origin and yknow, everythign else I mentioned? Yeah. I will definitely be adding celtic flair to his design when its coloured. Deceit is more obvious; Kaa was a good choice in influence that I noticed halfway through and just buckled down on. For Remus, he bounced around a bit between Maleficent and Dr Facilier, but in the end, I figured the Shadow Man was a better fit. Also his surname is literally just the Spanish for “Pickle” or “Gherkin”.

- Final info, if people are wondering, they’d all be centred on Huntsman training at Beacon, but in terms of where they’re from;

Roman and Remus would be from Atlas, obviously. That place spits out rich kids with issues like it’s quickfire Uno.

Virgil would be from Mantle; it’s pretty obviously one of the more run down and hard to live in areas, plus that’d set up the in this universe initial animosity between Roman and Virgil.

Logan is from Vale, so he’s a Beacon native. I considered him being from Atlas because of their tech. However, Vale won me over with Logan’s european influences and such.

Patton would be from Vacuo. I know its a weird choice, but hey, it’s full of faunus and it just fit a bit better than Menagerie or Mistral.

Speaking of, Deceit is 100% Menagerie born, but Mistral bred. He often tells people different conflicting origin stories, and won’t even tell his name to ex-buddy Virgil or ‘best buddy’ Remus.

I think that’s everything so far!!

I dunno if everyone else is as hype to see what comes of all this as I am, but either way I’m going to have fun doing it. <3

_______ PLEASE DO NOT: - repost my art at all - you are not permitted to line or colour this art - you are not permitted to use this art as an icon or profile pic - do not steal these designs, I put a lot of work into them ;; _______ Sanders Sides (c) @thatsthat24 RWBY (c) Monty Oum & Rooster Teeth The sketches belong to me.

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roninhunt0987 · 3 years

Text

The Birth of Lil Geni The Fox

By: Roninhunt0987

X3 finally after posting a bunch of pics and etc I now have the time to do the fic of Lil Geni's birth... =3 this is her here btw if ya forgot: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/42450002/

anyway the last one I did with the 7 kiddos of Gen'ichi and Ninjara there was a 6 year time skip... O.o for this one will be a 3 year time skip meaning on that the 7 kiddos will be 9 while Lil Geni will be around 3 years old... O.o so yea... anyways sit back and enjoy the hilarity

Characters(C)belongs to their rightful owners

-Kato/Prower residence-

Ninjara: -in the bathroom doing a pregnancy test as she just woke up while the others are in the living room watching cartoons-

Gen'ichi: -relaxing with Suzuki-

Suzuki: -watching cartoons-

Ran, Rei, Reiko, Rika, Miwa, Nori and Gen'ichi Jr: -watching tom and jerry-

tv: -shows tom getting hurt as the iconic Tom screaming sfx is heard in the background-

Ran, Rei, Reiko, Rika, Miwa, Nori and Gen'ichi Jr: -laughs-

Suzuki: XD hehehe

Gen'ichi: XD heh

Raph: -in the kitchen making homemade pizza- hmmm

Mikey: -reading comics which are the IDW sonic comics which is issue 24 and winces because of reading the bit where whisper is crying- ohhh geeze

Whisper: -looks over Mikey's shoulder and winces a lil because of that pain of a memory she had to go through-

Tangle: -same- Mikey: -looks to them- O.o whats wrong??

Whisper: -breathes in and then out- this... well uhm

Tangle: believe it or not mikey this actually happened.... like years ago before sonic and co moved to Station square city to help with Dad and the others...

Mikey: oh geeze i'm sorry I never knew that

Whisper: mmhmm... about a year ago Tangle and I got adopted on the spot when we saw the comic issue for the very first time....

Jared: -walks on over- thankfully around issue 29 or so things got back to normal... or well least the start of it... sonic went missing and landed somewhere at the Sol islands... he later returned to the main land when blaze used her abilities to send sonic back to help... plus the fact I was told Omega was uhm... .w. busted up as he was only a head at the time

Mikey: you mean like Lopez from red vs blue

Jared: O_o wait what??

Mikey: ya not kidding -gets out issue 25 and shows the page where cream and whisper were having a chat while omega was yammering on and such-

Jared: -looks at it- O_O oh crap I did not notice that

Omega: -looks over and looks at it and facepalms because the fact he did behave like lopez when he was only a head which was detached from his body at the time-

Jared: -looks to him- O_o ya did notice and realized that did ya Omega: affirmative I was indeed behaving like that SP Vector: .w. well least ya didn't speak spanish like Lopez Omega: Derogatory insult: SHUT THE F**K UP YA STUPID CROCK OF S**T!!!

Jared: O_o;;;;;; uhhh... rouge

Rouge: -from the kitchen- Ya?? Jared: O_o since when Omega can swear

Rouge: -from the kitchen- uhhh I dunno couple weeks ago when he was looking at random youtube videos of the swear words and such as well as other stuff

Jared: O_o got it just checking -walks off- geeze louise now Omega can swear like a sailor now gawd

Mikey: O_o oooookay

Donnie: -walks in- O_o hey what happened I could of sworn I heard E-123 omega started swearing

Leo: -walks in from the kitchen- thats because he did cuz SP Vector said something stupid insulting to Omega

Donnie: O_o owch

Ninjara: -comes out of the restroom with the pregnancy test being positive and is behind Gen'ichi and shows him that she is pregnant again- ^///^ Gen'ichi: -notices- ^^ hehehe

Suzuki: hu??

Ninjara: X3 kids just so ya know ya mama is pregnant ya may expect a lil sibling to look after which makes ya as big siblings now

Ran, Rei, Reiko, Rika, Miwa, Nori and Gen'ichi Jr: X3 YAY!!! Suzuki: XP and another kiddo for me to spoil

Gen'ichi: ^^ yup

SP Vector: O_o oh no

-first 3 months-

Ninjara: -has music playing and has the earphones on her tummy so her child can hear it-

SP Vector: -about to say something stupid until he gets a Kunai to his head- oh s**t -drops dead- X_x

Ninjara: -relaxing-

-second 3 months-

Ninjara: -eating chicken Terraki with Peanut butter on it-

SP Vector: how are ya eating all that

Ninjara: -glares- rrrrrrrr

SP Vector: O_o geeze screw you too lady

Suzuki: -doing that same Alastor moment as she is smirking like him and has a chainsaw as she revs it-

SP Vector: oh s-

Censored screen: -CENSORED: DEAR GOD NOT AGAIN!!-

SP Vector: -screaming from behind the censored screaming in bloody murder as he is getting sawed up with a chainsaw- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

-final 3 months: the birth-

-Megaville City Hospital-

Ninjara: -squeezing Gen'ichi's hand-

Gen'ichi: .w. this is fine -from his mind: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!-

-at the waiting room-

everyone: -waiting and etc-

nurse: -wheeling Ninjara in with a lil girl 3-tailed fox girl-

Gen'ichi: -smiles-

Ninjara: -smiles-

Ran, Rei, Reiko, Rika, Miwa, Nori and Gen'ichi Jr: -gathers round looking to their lil sister for the first time- ohhhhh

Suzuki: X3 hehe

Nori: X3 whats her name mommy

Ninjara: X3 this is Geni

Donnie: O.O oh wow an albino... O.o pure white 3-tailed fox girl

Lil Geni: -opens her eyes for the first time to see she has red and blue eyes and the look of saying hu- ?

Suzuki: -smiles as she holds her for the first time- ^^ hehe hey there i'm ya aunt Suzuki

Lil Geni: mew -nuzzles-

Gen'ichi: X3 awwww

Lil Geni: -looks to Gen'ichi- X3 mew mew mew mew

Gen'ichi: -chuckles and gets her from Suzuki carefully- ^^ hehe

Lil Geni: -nuzzles on her daddy for the first time- mew

Raph: -chuckles- hehe

Lil Geni: -random sticks her tongue out at Raph- Blep

Raph: O_o uhhhhhhh

Mikey: -busts out laughing at Raph- XD hehehehehehe

Raph: >< WHY YOU- COME HERE!!! -chases Mikey- Mikey: OH GEEZE RUNNING TIME!!! -runs-

Raph: MIKEY!!! -chases him-

Frenchie: 3 years l-

Karl The Fox-bat: NOPE!!! -kicks Frenchie out of the way and clears throat-

Frenchie: -offscreen groaning in pain-

Karl The Fox Bat: :3 3 years later

Ran, Rei, Reiko, Rika, Miwa, Nori and Gen'ichi Jr: -all 7 of them are now 9 years old as its fathers day which also happens to be Lil Geni's third birthday-

Lil Geni: X3 hehe -eating her cake with her dad-

Suzuki: -smiles as she has something for Geni-

Lil Geni: -notices the old plush- O.o whats that Aunt Suzuki

Suzuki: ^^ well... this was an old plush I have when I was about your age... =3 her name is Scrub... X3 I am passing her to ya now kiddo its all yours take care of her always... X3 come to me if ya want me to maintain her oki

Lil Geni: X3 oki thank you -hugs Scrub the plush- ^^

Raph: -about ready to give her b-day punches which he is gonna do carefully and then gets a cake splatter on his face from SP Vector- ._.;;;;

SP Vector: -laughs like Nelson- HA HA!!! Raph: -glares as he gets the cake off his face- YOU ARE SO DEAD CROCFACE!!! COME HERE!!!

SP Vector: OH CRAP AHHHHHH!!!!!

Karl The Fox-bat: :3 2 hours of asswhooping later

SP Vector: -in a full body cast- oooooggghhh

Leo: .w. never splat cake in raph's face

SP Vector: -muffles- oh bite me

Leo: ._. -does a karate chop on SP Vector- WHAP!!!

SP Vector: -his body cast breaks in two and has the look of utter pain on his face and insert Mamaf**ker SFX: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=edry0kuy8bo– MAMAF**KER!! Stupid Mario: -offscreen and yells it also: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=edry0kuy8bo - MAMAF**KER THATS MY A LINE B***H!!! SP Vector: >< WHATEVER!!!

Scene: -does a small fart noise of blacking out-

TFS Nappa: .w. the end

-XD END XD-

-RH0987 PRODUCTIONS 2021-

@otakuneko-lotus

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indecisive-v · 3 years

Text

NINJAMUFFIN DOING ANOTHER AMA ON TWITTER, HERE'S MORE SHIT FOR YA! keep in mind i'm just sharing the funkin related stuff, though i am including WAAAAY more than what i shared before 👍 go check out ninja's twitter profile for questions about stuff like ritz! questions in blue, answers in orange. if yall don't wanna read everything i MIGHT make a version of this post where i replace the answers with my own summaries of em (and if the questions are long, those too)

and here's a link to the ama tweet itself! dunno if it's still goin

Q: I figure the answer will be yes but do you have more plans to implement more guest appearances from people in the newgrounds community into FNF? Or are you all gunna focus on OG lore and stuff going forward

A: for guest appearances, I think we have always seen it as getting a healthy mix of both. PERSONALLY I'd like to lean towards having more OG stuff than guest stuff, BUT it's all a matter of what other boys think of that as well. I'm not the sole person working on game!

Q: Are you gonna release the full FNF game or are you gonna be releasing week after week? Like, are you gonna release week 8 or are we gonna wait some years until The Full Ass Game comes out?

A: Release plan for FNF right now is a few more updates or whatev to the 'demo' we have out right now, and then a long silence of probably no updates whatsoever until the full game is done (which will likely be a few years). That's partly why we made kickstarter for game.

Q: Hey so like, how much will Fnf cost after it's finished? And when will you ask the supporters what they want the game on?

A: It's all subject to change, but right now it prob gonna be standard 15-25$ lil steam indie game.

We will ask Kickstarter pledgers and whatnot what they want the game on SUPER close to when its released, to keep options open if we get onto anything like a console people want.

Q: 1. how was your day

2. are you releasing a week 8 song early like week 7, or are you goin full lockdown

A: I am doing GOOD today, and I think recently I've been good in general.

up to the mood, but so far we doing good about not having anything leak or whatev, so I think it'd be fun to have update come out with people not knowing what to expect at all. Build dat intrigue

Q: Will fnf ever get official plushies?? Seems like an untapped market

A: FNF plushies will prob happen some point, we have a lot of current merch stuff on our plates already though! (Mostly kickstarter type stuff, shirts, pins, posters, and all the physical OST stuff) Its a lot to sort out, but in time more and more stuff will happen. We r jus 4 boys!

Q: did you ever expect your game to blow up as it did? what was your first reaction to seeing it become super popular

A: FNF never had a humble moment, literally day 1 before the prototype even came out, the vid on twitter had like 5K likes overnight. Then when ludum dare version came out, it got 5K likes again, like it wasnt just a fluke. Was crazy, and def felt like somethin was different wit FNF

Q: Do you plan on getting other people to come in to help with the music? That seems like a lot of work to dump on one person, what with the erect mode and whatnot.

I guess the question could apply to all aspects of development. Will you be bringing on more people to help?

A: We definitely are getting help from other people. We are always keeping an eye on people for various different things. In terms of programming, already I've gotten 2 people (MtH and Geokureli) to help with certain Week 7 stuff (charting/polish, and loading stuff). Shit like dat

Q: Oh, also, will the Steam version be Workshop compatible? That'd really help streamline the process of downloading mods.

A: Steam version of FNF will likely NOT be Steam workshop compatible, because we want all the mods to NOT be spread out through different places. There WILL be modding support that is as streamlined as Steam workshop though. Mainly for non-steam versions of the game!

Q: Are there any chances that the game will have a physical release? Also any updates on a switch port? I remember one of you guys talking/joking about it.

A: Not impossible for FNF to get a physical release. We would want to see how far we could go with it though. I think it'd be super easy to do something wit people like LimitedRun games or whatev, but I think stuff like that can only go so far. I wanna see Funkin in mf Walmart!!!!!!

not that LimitedRun isn't going to be an option! Just we consider and pursue many different things! FNF release is years away, so we have time to think about everything. Whole mindset can be different just a few months from now.

Q: Out of curiosity, how are you dealing with all the popularity? It blew up so fast id barely be able to handle it if I was in your shoes.

A: The only way I've been able to handle it is having the other boys on the crew and being able to talk to them about all the overwhelmingness.

Part of it feels very lonesome, feels like NO ONE can come close to comprehending exactly how I'm feeling, except them. also other PALS!!!

Q: Do you own any of the bootleg FNF merchandise? Like any bootleg plushies or anything?

A: i dont, i genuinely think they r a waste of money, and I know any bootleg shit that gets made, we can prob go about and make it, and make it 100x cooler because we actually put effort into shit. bootleg shit just in it for the coin, so they aint gettin that from me

Q: How did you go about getting in contact with sr pelo for skid and pumps vocals?

A: Pelo i think was familiar and pals wit PhantomArcade a bit thru various Newgrounds things and collabs and whatnot.

pelo retweeted the first OG FNF posts first ever, and brought a LOT of attention to it. to pay him back, we put skid and pump in game! ask dave for more info prob

Q: what's the plan for having the full ass game open source if it's gonna cost money? couldn't people just download the source and compile the game for free?

A: when FNF is fully released, the full source code will be released as well.

the game will be DRM free so it will be way easier for people to redistribute the released/offical .exe instead of compiling it, so that's not the issue anyways. people will pay for things if they like it

Q: What are the chances of it getting on consoles like switch or Playstation, ps5 would definitely be my preferred way to play

A: it'd be a matter of hiring someone to build out backend stuff for those specific consoles. someone who knows their way around all the wacky code stuff, AND knows console hardware stuff. Then its just a matter of hittin up those console manufacturers (Sony, Microsoft, or Nintendo)

the CLOSEST one is SWITCH. pretty much all of that backend is already made, so it just a matter of gettin all that access and shit.

i think in any case though, there's a lot of NDA stuff required, i dunno how much we'd be able to talk about it even IF we get that stuf sorted

Q: any ideas of releasing it on epic store or another platform?

A: Right now, the only thing that is 100% confirmed and WILL happen is a Steam version, itchio version, and mobile versions on respective app stores. Other storefronts aren't out of the picture though, but we don't want to spread ourselves too thin with it.

Q: Will you continue using HaxeFlixel to make the rest of FNF?

A: yes, because it is what I'm the most technically proficient in, and generally is VERY flexible. just a matter of ME becoming a better coder. It's ALL open source, so if I need something done a certain way, either I can do it, or we can hire someone to do it.

Q: have you seen game theory's videos on your game yet and if so, what do you think about them? (not talking about his predictions because i dont want spoilers. i like mystery)

A: it is always good silly fun to watch the Game Theory vids about Funkin with some pals, and see what matpat thinks of the game. i lov the vids, but wish he used my face less! Or at least used a cuter pic of me like this one!!

Q: Ok so: What does the future of FNF look like to you?

A: future of FNF is a rhythm game that not only exceeds every expectation that people have of it, but subverts most expectations and conventions as well.

Q: Do you plan on retouching on older weeks once the game is fully out? Like reanimating sprites, redoing some charting, updating the background, etc

A: retouching and probably overhauling certain aspects is almost definitely gonna happen. Everything is fluid and can be changed (and should be changed when necessary). i dont think anything should be too attached to, especially this early on in development

Q: I honestly do not care if the answer to this is vague as hell to keep surprises and shit lol but… Since Week 7 was the closest we’ll get to a playable girlfriend (still bf controlling tho), do you have plans to make girlfriend playable in spin-off things or just freeplay?

A: wouldnt be out of the picture for a playable GF, i don't think we've had some hard thing AGAINST it. just a matter of what we want out of the game, and what sort of story or whatev we could do with that concept

Q: How do BF and GF manage to meet famous newgrounds characters (such as pico, tankman and the others to come) like is this all in one universe/ timeline or are they being brought in?

A: i think they are all just there existing. i think there's a lot of wacky things in other media that try to justify crossovers, like MULTIVERSE bullshit or TIMELINE shit, but i dunno, its like subspace emissary. Captain Falcon and Olimar from Pikmin just hang out. Shit like dat

disclaimer that all lore shit is in phantomarcade head pretty much and maybe there is wacky dimensions or somethin

Q: Will the game have dlc?

A: its not too unlikely that we'd have expansions of some sort, but i mean right now we plan on packing in as much as we can into base game, and trying to make that as pure as possible.

if there is ANY dlc, i would personally want it to be 100% free updates

Q: How did you meet Phantom Arcade, Kawai Sprite, and EvilSker? And what do you think about the community and its controversies?

A: me and phantomarcade been fukin around NG for years so years and years ago we naturally crossed paths and became pals

about 2 years ago i found kawaisprites music on NG, and started talkin wit him, made Ritz wit him and we fell in lov

and evilsk8r i met cuz of FNF!!!

quik elaborate on evilsk8r, wanted artist for gamejam FNF was for (ludum dare), and OG person i asked wasnt available, so he referred me to evilsk8r, who I have never met or talked to before ever.

#friday night funkin #fnf #fridaynightfunkin

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the-a-j-universe · 4 years

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Alright, cool. I finally have a guaranteed length of time that should be long enough to go through all of these, so let’s do this. I know the plan was to have me address each ask one at a time but that didn’t work out lol so I’m just doing it all at once. I’m also turning it into a post so anyone who wants to can follow along with my journey.

I’m also gonna copy/paste the text of the other asks instead of screen capping them because copy/pasting is faster lol.

I’m gonna put a pic of each one here, give my thoughts, maybe a goofy rating (I dunno), and then pick my favorite. Just so y’all know.

* Tanawy's entry n.1 in the Dragon Quest monster showcase: the all-time classic Slime. When asked to design the Slime like the standard goop monster they usually were, Toriyama said "no" and a legend was born, now cute slimes are more popular than the disgusting goop depiction. Its cousins and variants are numerous and some are very different from one another so as a bonus here the criminally underutilized Mottle Slime and its evolution the Mottle King Slime.

See, I don’t even need to look this one up. Here it is:

But let’s be real, you guys didn’t need to see an image of this dude either. I love this thing. I never went through a period where I thought of the grosser oldschool slimes. This thing has always been what’s come to my mind when I here the word in an RPG context. Which, considering my zero experience with DQ, really speaks to this thing’s popularity. I am actually going to remove this one from consideration, though, for that reason. I just have too much of a bias towards it. I know it too well, and all variations seem to be equally great. It’s a 10/10, though. Truly iconic.

Get the rest after the cut!

* Tanawy's entry n.2: Originally a boss monster, here is the Golem. While not the sharpest tool in the shed, these brick-made guys can be quite loyal, with a child-like personality, downright adorable (I will never forget you Goldirox) but their strenght in battle must not be underestimated. And since St. Valentinus is around the corner here a Chocolate Golem variant as a gift. Friendship chocolate mind you, from a dude to another 😄

I like this guy. He reminds me of a couple oldschool Yugioh cards. They’re all bad cards, but I’m nostalgic for them so that help’s this guy’s chances. I don’t know that I buy him as a threatening boss, though. He seems more like he’d be your big stone pal.

The chocolate variant is absolutely adorable.

8.5/10 overall for both.

* Tanawy's entry n.3: Here are two members of the Machine Family, first the Killing Machine. These relentless hunters are merciless and they are constantly upgrading, so models with different modifications are plenty. They even come with garden sprinkles. Then there is the Mecha-mynah, who puts a different spin on the mechanical Cuckoo-bird motif. Careful these guys have razor-sharp wings and they selfdestruct when cornered.

Alright, not so much for the second one, but the Killing Machine also reminds me of, like, a half dozen Yugioh monsters. Did Kazuki Takahashi just like ripping this franchise off or something? Either way, these are both good designs, but they don’t really work for me that much. They’re a little...plain? I guess? I guess I like my machine creatures rougher and with more detail. 7/10.

* Tanawy's entry n.4: Next are my deepest fears (exaggeration) if they were real; the Waspion, half wasp half scorpion, and the Claw Hammer, Half hammerhead shark half metal scolopendra, all nightmare. Continuing with the caravan of creepiness, here is the Bona Constrictor, just get it away from me. This next one, when i saw it for the first time i yelled "WTF is That?!" here is the Ulcer, a walking awful pile of rotting flesh.

I am NOT a fan of the Ulcer. That thing’s ugly, and not even in a fun way. 0/10.

I like these other guys, though:

The Waspion is literally just Gligar from Pokemon, but aside from that I like animal/creature mash-ups. And the Claw Hammer is a pretty unique one. 9/10 for the whole lot.

* Tanawy's entry n.5: Beef or chicken? Why choose when you can have both? Here is a heavyweight of the Bird Family the taurine Bullfinch. But dont forget your vegetables, or else they might turn into these Plant family monsters, the eggplant Woebergine, the bellpeppers Capsichum and the cucumber Cruelcumber. Also, meet the Peahooter, these guys pelts their targets with arrows taking advantage of their higher ground.

Okay, we’ve got another mash-up creature here in the form of the Bullfinch, but I’m not feeling this one as much. It’s worth, like, a 6.5/10, maybe. The Woebergine and the Peahooter are both pretty interesting. The Peahooter is kinda cute in a weird way and the Woebergine is delightfully derpy. They both deserve approaching an 8/10. I’m not really feeling the Capsichum at all though. They get a 5 or a 6/10.

* Tanawy's entry n.6: Who doesn't like a good dog? Well maybe not these guys from the Beast family: the Chainine who will ensnare their preys with their collars, the Putrefido, who is no longer alive, the Abracadabrador, who will eat your bones, the Crocodog, a levitating (yes this thing floats in the air) dog-crocodile hybrid and finally the Jackal Ripper (long lost relative of Wolverine or just imitator? More at 11 on the news)

Hey now. That’s not really fair to the other entries. Every one of these dudes:

Is a very GOOD BOI. I think I like the Abracadabrador the least. He’s a little too un-dog-like compared to the others. 6.5/10. The Chainine and the Putrfido are both the perfect blend of cute and weird. I like them a lot. They get 7.5/10. Jackal Ripper is a badass 8/10. He’d be cooler if he was wearing jeans. I LOVE the Crocodog, though. 10/10. Perfect. He just looks like a friend, but he also looks like he could kill my enemies. Which is what I like in a monster.

* Tanawy's entry n.7: Here is a taste of Japan with the Boppin’ badger, the most Tanuki-like monster you will ever meet; Then these guys don't need consent to give everyone within their reach a smooch, here is the Lips. Also, beware of these horses of the underworld, the Equinox where they probably hangout with these other lovely fellows, the Hellspawn. Speaking of which here is the demon Teeny Sanguini. Cute eh? Not when it evolves in the Bloody Manguini. Thankfully not everyone of them does that.

Okay, you can’t fool me. That first one is just a regular animal.

Jokes aside, though, I’m not really feeling this bunch unfortunately. The Hellspawn just reminds me too much of mutant can Steven, the Lips is a little boring, and the Equinox, while I like the wordplay in its name, and while it’s cool in principal, is too busy. I’m just not feeling the designs of these guys overall. 4 or 5/10 for the whole lot. Though the Teeny Sanguini is closer to a 5 than a 4.

* Tanawy's entry n.8: There are two species of monsters, the Pips and their cousins the Conks, who constatly imitate the classic classes of the humans, like warriors or priests, but this time the little rascals have gone a little farther and here they are copying the DQ8 4 main heroes in the Trodainian Conklave, the DQ4 heroes in the Zenithian Conklave, the hero of DQ1 and the 3 heroes of DQ2 in the Alefgardian Conklave and the hero of DQ3 with 3 other companions in the Aliahanian Conklave. Cute.

Okay, I love the idea of these things. They’re cute, they fit right in with the general aesthetic of the franchise, and they have a ton of personality. I’m not gonna post pics of all of them because there’re so many, but they deserve ~9/10 collectively. They’re very good.

* Tanawy's entry n.9: Not enough dragons? So here's three: what do you get mixing a T-rex, a dragon and a vicious axeman? An Hacksaurus that's what! Then the Drakulard. Don't be fooled by their mole these portly fellows mean business. Another chubby dragon, the Jargon: dragonic masters of the clay containers, these guys URNed their right to use jar puns and they will make sure you remenber it, even if they have to crack your pot.

Okay now these are more what I was thinking when I heard the title Dragon Quest.

I like the Hacksaurus the best outta them. He just looks nice. They’re all good, though. They fit the art style perfectly, and resemble each other just enough that you buy them all being related creatures. 8/10 overall, though the Hacksaurus is a little above the others, with the Jargon being a barely at the bottom of the barrel. Or the jar I guess.

* Tanawy's entry n.10: The only story entry in this showcase, because just look at him, it's the only DQ big baddie (at least in english) to actually call themselves "the Demon Lord" It's Orgodemir, specifically it's true form which is the first photo you find in the gallery at almost end-page. Let me just tell you this, Orgodemir is a d*ck of the highest level. The brain it's actually an eyelid for a giant eye by the way. Happy Nightmares.

HAHAHAHA. I know there are other forms for this guy, and this is probably not the reaction that anyone who played the game would have, but I just can’t take this guy seriously. He looks like Edward Cullen with bat wings. HAHAHA. 8/10 ‘cause it made me laugh.

* Tanawy's entry n.11: And lastly, in a category i like to call "I can't belive these are real", its the Funky Ferret; yes he and his cousins do exactly what the image shows. And the almost copyright-infinging Owlbear, yes they did not even try to distance themself from D&D with this one (ok they have a variant but is not saying much). There were others in the last category, but since they REALLY did not age gracefully to the modern standards of "acceptable" i prefered not show them.

I love Owlbears, they’re just such iconic fantasy monsters at this point, so he gets a solid 8/10 rating by default. It’s a pretty original take, too, focusing on the cuteness potential of the creature over the badass potential. I like that.

The Funky Ferret, though...

With a name like that this guy coulda been so cool. But he’s just a pretty generic design blended with a fart joke. What a bummer. 3/10.

And there we have it. Probably not exactly what you were thinking but I hope you like it. I don’t hate any of these guys. Some are more boring than others, but there’s something neat about each of them. I like the ones that take badass ideas and make them cute while remaining intimidating best out of all of them, and I think the Crocodog does this best with the Hacksaurus as the runner up. Crocodog is definitely my favorite of these, though. He gets the Best Good Boi award of Bestness.

Orgodemir gets an award, too, though, the “made AJ spit out his rum and Coke laughing” award. It’s not the most coveted, but it’s something.

I know this is a long one, and y’all may not want to reblog, but what do any of my followers think of these funky dudes? Leave a comment on this post or reblog with your answer in the tags!

#long post #my dumb thoughts #dragon quest #monster showcase #trademark

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almaasi · 5 years

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I wanna watch Star trek but I don't know where to start! Is there a series that's most popular? Do I have to watch them in order?

OOH YES. it’s all on netflix so watching it is EASY PEASY

i’ll tell you about each of them, personal opinions included.

so!

there’s “star trek”, the original series, made in the 1960s, which is what my mama grew up watching. this is the one with kirk and spock and uhura etc. this is the fandom that kickstarted Fandom. it’s perhaps worth watching for the historical revolution aspect. i haven’t seen more than few episodes here and there (i found its pacing slow these days, yet adored the ones i saw as a kid, and would rewatch them over and over). you could watch “the trouble with tribbles” as a stand-alone. it’s 10/10 and hilarious. i intend to get back to watching the rest sometime. i’ve enjoyed this series mostly through tumblr gifsets and fanart. as far as i can tell, not watching all of it doesn’t really affect the watching of the rest… because…

imo, the 90s era of star trek shows were the best (the next generation, deep space nine, voyager…. and enterprise, which i haven’t seen yet). they’re mostly weird, cheerful, and upbeat. tng comes first, which gives some context to ds9, but besides a few crossover characters and storylines, you could watch either without the other. voyager occasionally has characters from the others but it’s pretty stand-alone (you could definitely watch this one with zero context).

show concepts (of the ones i’ve watched, sorry enterprise):

the next generation (tng): utopian adventure looking at space!! people trying to be perfect and being like ooooh aliens. ooh planets. this is the basic 90s trek. some bad stuff happens, but not a lot. mostly wacky spaceship antics/intrigue and people trying to do their jobs even when space shit hits the space fan. (season 6 of tng runs parallel with season 1 of ds9, and there’s one ds9/tng crossover episode in tng. the character of worf is developed here and is later introduced to ds9.) definitely a good one to start with!

deep space nine (ds9): everyone lives on a broken space station. this show is the edgy goth cousin, but the one with the heart and soul that i am so freaking in love with right now. my favourite star trek by far. the characters have SO MUCH DEPTH and i swear they’re all queer or autistic or both. this one gets plot-heavy as it goes on, but it maintains its underlying warmth and still has those ridiculous fun episodes that make everything okay again for 45 minutes. i love the characters so muh-hu-huuuch and the FOUND FAMILY vibe is literally out of this world. there’s only maybe 3 episodes out of 176 that i didn’t like, and they’re all one-off-romance episodes that squick me for personal reasons (compulsory heterosexuality, ableism?? ew ew ew, scrubbed forever from my personal canon). overall the writing is phenomenal. like maybe one of the consistently best-written shows i’ve ever seen, including modern stuff. plus i found another otp (garak/bashir) and that’s undoubtedly a big part of why i love this show so much. i am deeply compelled by character relationships, and this one has oodles of exactly that. you can ship anyone with anyone else and you’d be right.

voyager (voy): just a bunch of nerds tryna get home for 7 years straight. a lot of funky weirdness happens along the way. this is my second favourite after ds9. found family, but in a more professional way than ds9. i dunno if it’s just my opinion formed after not seeing this show for a few years, but i remember the writing of this one seemed kinda all over the place. always fun though, maybe because of its changeability. lady boss captain, hell yeah. (season 2 of ds9 runs parallel with season 1 of voy.)

then…

well, there’s the new shows, discovery (dsc) and picard (pic)

and i haven’t watched picard yet, but i’m getting the impression it has a similar vibe as discovery, and i just……. don’t like it. discovery is dark, violent, emotionally harrowing, and i guess there’s a time and place and audience for that, but it’s not me, or any time i want to watch something. it’s supposed to be ~reflecting the modern zeitgeist~ or whatever, but imo in these trying times i’d rather watch something soft and hopeful that makes me think about how to improve things, rather than something that hits a little too close to home and makes me think about oh god where are we headed if this keeps happening. i mean, it’s still going for the “help humanity improve” schtick of the 90s shows, but in a very different way.

and then there’s the modern jj abrams movies…….. eh, i guess they’re okay. lens flare and explosions, man. give me seven-season arcs with hundreds of ridiculous plot concepts any day.

tl;dr:

i conferred with my sister, and she gave some very good advice: start with tng, and if that doesn’t vibe with you, try voyager, and then ds9, since it’s good to get the context of how star trek deals with morality before ds9 knocks the entire concept on its ass.

but no, you don’t have to watch the series(es?) in the order they were made. background world-building storylines would make more sense if you did, but each show is generally unrelated. my family even found it kinda rewarding to watch them out of order (tng, voy, ds9) and piece together plot threads laid down in other shows.

but you can just pick one and go. c:

–

sister (@sweetdreamspootypie) adds which question each show attempts to ask and answer:

tng: how can we grow into the best of humanity? / what does it look like to be the best of humanity?

voy: what will we give up to stick to our principles?

dsc: what principles will we give up to stay alive?

ds9: capitalism, war, religion, diversity, real people just tryna live, leaning into the grey morality of Being Good. this isn’t a question. “how dare you infect me with morals!!”

#star trek #ishachan #ds9 #tng #voy #Elmie watches things #post of postiness #replies #long post

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subarashiet · 4 years

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lifes been weird and sad , got so much stuff i wanna say dont even know if thats the right subred to but here goes.i m 18 , from Greece , first year in Uni and life is not the way i want it to bei live on my own , rent is being paid by mom and her husband , month pocket money given by dad and by my part time jobat some point in high school i understood that our school years were our most carefree years , tho only now do i really understand itman this post is gonna cramp my fingers shouldve used the pcused to hang out a lot till 2nd year of high school then in 3rd year cause of me studying more i was hanging out less , used to have around 4groups of ppl to hang around then only one , cliche but i wasnt anyone special in school , gotta mention i went to a music middle-high school , only highlights i remember are in 2th-3rd grade trading blows with a girl (think she was 5th grade) ,3rd grade kissing a girl in her cheek then running away from the boy-horde coming after me , 4th grade trading blows with a 6th grader ,6th grade punching a guy for calling names my little sis (we good now see him out we talk he a nice dud) , 9th grade a girl i had a chance with but fucked it up big time , 9th grade breaking a cello almost getting expelled ,12th grade playing bass at a concert in Thessaloniki with a music group of my schooldidnt really have many close friends but there were some from school and other places you can call closer friends , but now even with them i ve started to fade away which i cannot bear but i m the type of giving up and not trying until i m lategot laboratory this morning and this is gonna take a while hope i can get some sleepfeels weird using reddit to express my thoughts i even find it a bit cringy talking to myself but oh welli wanted to visit a physiatrist because i ve been so mentally tired that i think i might have crippling sadness xD but i tried to arrange that back in July-August pre my 18th bday so she said a parent was required to be present so i just kept all the stuff to myselfi was learning classic guitar from 1st grade to 8th still play to this day , in music school i kinda learned h2p electric but didnt practice enough to be able to play good , also know some pianobeen listening to post rock and mostly fate music these past 10 monthssucker for good anime tho i ve been out of it lately havent even finished my summer ones , oregairu has a nice ending from what i got spoiled fromanyway thing is i am sad most of the time , i try not to show it cause i like the stereotype of being the strong guy that everyone can depend on and almost never see being emotional and also like the cool tempered guy type , tho lately i ve been craving a lot of attention that i drop the act of the calm n cool sometimesthings with my parents didnt go to well these past years , only now i can say that we ve finally kinda calmed down , mom and dad started falling out of it around 8th grade cause lots of fighting , big sis kindof took the role of mother while on her teen years , feels like she had it much worse than me10th grade sis leaves home to go elsewhere to start studies for uni , i m left with ma and lil sis back homethen i understand that i have to be there for my little sis which also got in my school that year (3kids-3years difference each) so i tried to assume the role of the big brother but she was closer to her older sister than me , i was closer to my older sister as well , feels like i was doing my lil sis wrong but i cpould relate more to big sis and could chat with her more about stufflil sis didnt open up to me a lot even to this day , she has been a lot more comfortable with me through the years i think cause she told me something important recently , kinda feelsbadman tho cause i wanted to be closer to her and i kinda tried but i think not hard enough cause she didnt seem to get any closer , cried once about it in front of my mother which was the absoluteliest worst cause i didnt want her to see me being fragile jesustho even now that i m not home i talk to her play some among us tried making her start xenoverse 2 that didnt go farhave some friends from school , we would only go all together at internet cafes , but mostly 4 of em would go out togetherin my school i had some friends from scouts tooi have an insta , used to post "cool" pics kinda stopped cause i like looking cool in front of others but i havent been in the mood to try in around a year nowused to be in some conservatory guitar groups with some other kids there , with one girl from there i used to be quite in touch until recently that i stopped seeing her for some reasons maybe i ll explain l8rwe had fun and i really mean it , we used to go on trips to play songs on different cities and stages , our group became kinda known the 2-3 good active years we were active , it still is but these years were the originals , now there are other peoplefucking christ its 2:27started playing in that group with the originals in 2017 till 2019 , we were kids from different ages going from 6th to 10th graders but i didnt understand the different in our ages until recently that i found one of the guys from the group in my cityanother closer friend is a guy from my school , met him in grade 7 still talk to him , used to sit together most of the years pretty neat guy , peculiar character but really interesting kind smart and hard workingman why couldnt my teen years be like shirou from fsn that would be awesomehad entrance exams 4-5 months ago , didnt really go as planned , shooted for Corfu didnt get in cause rather than 15 i got 10 in my last exam so i m still in my city , tho i live alone and go to my local uni insteadJuly 2019 i moved out of my old house moved in with ma and her husband with my sis , stayed there till september then till june-july 2020 i was living with my fathertbh i decided to write this post after watching a vid of Korone talking about Okayu thinking that i ve never been in an actual relationship and that i eould want to experience that but dont know where to start from , losing weight ? becoming outgoing again ? learn how to talk to girls ?i started watching anime back in 2015 on my 3ds i remember watching dubbed Inazuma Elevensince like 2 weeks ago i reached 201 anime completedok i ll stop here for tonight cause i got online uni classes tmrw i keep stimestamps for whenever i finally post this -Tuesday 3/11/2020 02:41used to be around 85-90kg in 12th grade , put on around 20-28 kilos since March 2020 , managed to lose 8-10 kilos in the summer but i m still around 30kilos up from the normal amount based on my height , got a subscription to a gym jan2019 but only managed to get into it for a short period on spring 2019 then autumn 2019 then lost motivation and let go , since March2020 i ve been doing some weights at home , tho when i look at myself in the mirror it doesnt really change how bad i feel about my body , i think my old motivation used to be a girl i used to have a crush on but not surethings with my parents werent all that great and i was mentally better when i would talk with them , they are openminded af and supportive too but puberty makes you see stuff differently like everyone is against you like the world is against you (last one might be true dunno yet) , living on my own now seems to be a bit better but as our Greek ancestors used to say theres no good without bad and the bad in this scenario is that its lonely as fuck , having lived for 18 years with my family it really hits a weird spot , everything feels lonelier now with the virus spreading around not being able to see others as much as we used to , uni doesnt feel nice , many people dont pay attention and its like the second half of 12th grade all over againgot my monthly money 4days ago , went from 200 to 9.28 quickly , when i have money i spend when i dont i m stingy , mostly like to build computers , watch lots of Linus , Paul , Kyle , Jay etc. most of my money goes to buying stuff about computers food , used to give lots of money to internet cafes when i used to hang out with the guys from school , not anymorewith the start of uni we all met new friends even i but i still feel like i am drifting apart day by day , stopped talking to my old girl friend cause i was kinda done with her attitude , called me some names i didnt appreciate because i put up with her attitude , most of the time in her own world , only would really pay attention and try to change herself when it was something she cared about , one of them wasnt her character , but to give the goods of her she was a good friend dont know if i can say she still is a friend or just someone i know , she helped me even with the girl i had a crush on , was really fun on trips with the guitar group , all in all a fun person , thing is i stopped texting her and telling her to go out cause it was 80% me trying and the other 20% her and i think that proved right when i stopped talking to her cause i thought she will see that i m not talking to her she ll think somethings wrong she ll message me to go out and have fun , send me a happy bday message posted some pics of me , didnt send me anything else after , stopped talking to her around the start of October , if i hadnt asked her something about her uni and if it wasnt my bday i dont think we wouldve talked in all of october . last saturday i was working in the area she lives in my city decided to call her sometimes didnt answer tried to suprise her and see how she is by going to her house , noone answered maybe they were on a trip idk , but it feels weird man , in the first half of the year me and a common friend of her and me went out one night , ended up being the bad guy to make her understand that she did something wrong that night , after she left i was left with our common friend talked about stuff and mostly her and i expressed myself , i knew that coming summer me and her would end up at different places so i wanted to tell her all the wrongs with her so that she could finally understand what i ve been putting up against and make her understand that she HAS to pay attention to people around her and that she will meet new people and that she ll have to be careful about her character , used to have a bit of crush on her back in 7th grade , can kinda understand why that went . On the other hand i didnt want to part ways with her with our last words being me ranting , one thing brought the other and she wont be going to her uni's city until early 2021 so i managed to go out with her some more in the summer and september . kinda feels bad to see that almost noone remembered my bday cause i remember in cram school when someone had their bday they would get a fucking cake , dont mistake me i got one , from my ma my two sisters and my moms husband , thing is i wanted to have something happen with friends , nothing happend , around 4 people remembered my bday and the others just send me some happy bday messages after seeing posts from the girl i m talking about .also heres a good song to listen to while reading stuff on reddit Sorrow from FSN by MN64 cant post links from what i understandgonna stop here for now might edit later -Tuesday 3/11/2020 15:15thing is reddit is not the right place to get help and i need a friend but it seems i cant get any from my friends , even my other friend the guy i used to sit with in all middle-high school he has drifted apart , talking more with other of his friends doing other stuff etc , that one time i needed to talk to him he said i ll call you in a while , waitied 1 and a half hour then asked him why he didnt call he said he forgot (i think) , feelsbadmananyway i dont think i m gonna keep editing this i ranted enough , gonna leave the post up for a day or so in case anyone wants to add anything then taking it down -Tuesday 3/11/2020 23:58

#personal rant #confession

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lokilickedme · 5 years

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Writing Update, 8/8

Haven’t done one of these in ages, I had to go searching for my old update art up there. Ugggh I’ve missed those boys, but it may be time to make a new one. Jake, Chief, and Loki perhaps? I forget I still have an open King fic too, I suppose I could leave him on there but maybe update his pic, since he’s not doing too many CEO things these days :)

Anyway -

THE DEPARTMENT: Chapter 6 is finished and ready for Sunday. More character and world building and Saint, yay. Chapter 7 is finished and ready for the Sunday after that. The llama and Ted! Yay! Chapter 8 is mostly done and so are bits of chapter 9. Chief needs some cardio and is gonna get it whether he wants it or not. Yay?

SHRINE OF YOUR LIES: I’ll update this randomly without doing a notification post each time, since it’s for a side fandom and not many of my regulars are into it. Probably it’ll have a new short chapter going up tomorrow and another a few days later. Most of the fic is complete. Lots and lots of mystical angst and eternal immortal love, that sort of rubbish. God I love that sort of rubbish.

HAMMER OF THE GODS: Chapter 23 is in my head. That doesn’t do us a lot of good, but at least I know what to write when I start writing it :) Tatertot and Jake are so not meant to be together, but that’s probably not going to stop them from doing one more stupid thing.

SUNFLOWER: I’ve currently got nothing here. Sorry. You know how shy Tommy and Chloe are...but Amy is hiding so there’s that at least.

AINGEAL ARD: Will hammer out chapter 16 when I have a little extra time and am in the mood to think like a drunk Scotsman. We’re getting closer and closer to the end of Sgaile Leannan here, and then I’ll decide if I want to attempt the absolute shrieking heartbreak that would be Samhach Mhiannan from King’s POV.

JACK MONTAGUE: Chapter 63 is about half written. Mentions of Doctor Strange, the Infinity stones, and Nicola Tesla. Are they getting out of the portal system yet? Who the hell knows, but I imagine somebody needs to pee pretty bad by now.

THE KING OF ALL THE REST: God I’d love to work on this one. But not yet. Loki’s on his way home though, and that’s going to be all kinds of noisy.

KIZ YAN KAPI: Ugh, Pasha and Kiran. Sorry to abandon you like this, kiddos. One of these days I’ll come back to you, I promise...I just gotta brush up on my Turkish again.

NON-AO3 WORKS:

THE MCCLARY CHRONICLES BOOK 4: Last I looked, it had an ending that’s likely to put everybody’s jaw on the floor. The middle is a bit disjointed and at the moment it’s more like a collection of stories being told by all the people around Molly and King, and I’m not sure that’s how I want it to be...I’ll decide later when I start working on it again. Get ready for grown-up Pod and a love story that rivals his mom and dad’s.

THE CARMICHAEL ADDENDUM BOOK 2 (The Magnussen Ultimatum): Oh god I love this trilogy so much. So so much. SO MUCH. I left Kaine and Aiden on a rooftop battling a mutant Lesser Harpy while Clarissa mocks their sloppy skills from the roof of a nearby building and refuses to help. Business as usual, you know how it goes. She’s mad at them both, which is pretty typical. And the only innocent person this time around is Fausto.

NOW AND THEN (Strada Book 2): I can’t even tell you how much I love writing this series. Baltho and Keene...my heart, crikey. My loins. My damn hormones. It’s maybe half finished and once I get over what just happened to Baltho I’ll get back on it. Death and destruction, baby.

TRICKSTER TALES: Well, this one is written, entirely, and has been for god knows how long. I just need to finish editing and formatting it and it’ll go to publishing. All Loki all the time, what’s better than that?

THE KING’S HEART: Same as above, sort of just waiting for the right time to send it out into the world.

EIDOS: Late 2020 for this one. Too much intense work to be done, including the art. Yeah, I’m doing in-book art for it. Will it work out? I dunno but I’m going to try it anyway, because why the hell not.

THE CHEMICAL PREHISTORIES: Just waiting its turn :)

#writing update #lokilickedme #my fics and books #Loki #Hiddleston

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acrobaticcatfeline · 5 years

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The Fear of the Dragonwitch (Triplets Rolorem AU) Chapter 2!!!

Word Count: 2738

TW: Remus, vague mentions of deceit, swearing, arguing, anxiety, self deprecation, that’s it I think, lmk if I missed anything!!!

Notes: Ok so we have a second chapter!!! First chapter here! I have a whole plot line planned out for this fic y’all don’t understand. This chapter is just family dynamics, but next chapter should have more interaction with the other characters. Hopefully I get to a bit of Logan centric things soon but who knows, I certainly don’t! I hope you like it, I really do!

Pairings: Vivian x Mimi (OCxOC), pining demus possibly more in the future!

Summary: “wait you can sing?” roman was just trying to tell his family about this lifechanging event, and no one is taking his concerns seriously! though, maybe a bit of confidence and encouragement from the right people might sooth his anxieties enough for him to actually be excited instead of dreading what was going to happen tomorrow.

“wait you can sing?”

While it was an expected outcome, Roman was in fact rather upset at how quickly his brother had brushed off the important part of his confession. yes, in fact, he can sing but that’s not the point! The point was that he was now being thrown headfirst into a leading role in a musical in front of way more people than he was comfortable with and he was expected to sing and dance as well? While he was catastrophizing Logan pulled up to the curb, stopping to let them get in the car. Unfortunately, while Roman was ready to just drop it and move on, Remus had other plans. As they strapped into the car Remus kept running his mouth.

“seriously though, I've literally never heard you sing how can you be lead role worthy when you’ve never sung in your life? I mean like congrats I guess but like, I dunno if your teachers all that-”

“Remus if I had brought this up so you could tell me how unqualified and bad I was in general I would have asked this morning. I mentioned it because I'm terrified of doing any of this and I can’t let down my teacher. Yes, I can sing, I do it often you just never pay attention to anything in the world other than your stupid bubble. I should have known better than to talk to you about this, of course this is how you'd respond.”

“what's this about?”

Oh yeah, Logan was there too. Well he should probably know too-

“Roman randomly sung in his drama class and got chosen to play the leading role in the schools musical for this quarter.”

Well then. Guess he didn’t need to explain himself. He turned around in his seat, giving a look of ‘what the fuck???’ towards Remus before settling again, ready to be interrogated. However, Logan simply smiled.

“so, your friends absolutely hate you for singing huh?”

“no… shut up!!!”

“hey, congrats ro. You deserve it.”

“no??? no I don’t???? Logan you don’t understand I didn’t even audition!!! He just gave me the part!!! Like firstly that’s unfair to the rest of the kids who actually want parts, and secondly, I don’t want the part?????? This isn’t a ‘congrats!’ occasion!!! This is an ‘oh shit you just got roped into complete life ruining changes because you're an anxious mess who is too afraid to disappoint your teacher’!!!”

“one is easy, the auditions were last week. He already heard all the other options and decided you were the best. You should feel good about that Ro. Two, also simple. I know how much of your free time you spend wishing you could be the one on stage, I see you humming and swaying around the house restraining yourself, you want to do this, you're just scared.”

“…”

“third, change isn’t going to ruin your life. he's not changing your classes, he's not taking you off the tech crew, not much is actually changing. You're using your teacher as extra justification to do something you’ve been dreaming of. You’ve let your anxiety blind you from knowing what you really want. You can’t let it control every aspect of your life.”

“… stop being ‘wise beyond your years’ with me its uncalled for and I'm feeling attacked.”

“listen what do you want from me, I have the knowledge what else am I supposed to do with it at this point?”

“stupid jerk prodigy brother… you stole all the brains from us I can promise.”

“I was by far the smallest of us, I did not absorb your brains.”

“pics or it didn’t happen.”

“insufferable”

As soon as they were home things flipped on their head. Remus had a call and suddenly he was having a breakdown. He wouldn’t even tell anyone what had happened he was just pacing back and forth with wide eyes filled with tears. He was half delirious and Logan was trying and failing to reason with him.

Re, you're walking a hole in the floor you need to calm down. I know you're having an anxiety attack but-”

“IM NOT HAVING AN ANXIETY ATTACK!!!”

“Remus stop yelling-”

“NO, YOU SHUT UP!!! IM NOT ROMAN I DON’T HAVE ANXIETY IM NOT EVEN STRESSED SEE I AM FINE JUST LEAVE ME BE!!! YOU HAVE THE WRONG BROTHER”

Roman and Logan sat in stunned silence as Remus ran off to his room. Roman gave Logan a look and Logan straightened his back and shook his head trying to be composed, though his steadily shaking hands sold him out. He turned away from where Remus had previously been standing and looked back at Roman, moving his offending hands behind his back.

“well it seems like he refuses to be reasoned with. I suppose we have to wait for mother to get home to fix whatever is bothering him.”

“its not your fault lo.”

“… yes. I- of course I know that why would you think I thought otherwise. It was clearly whatever stressor acting on him and not my involvement. I know that. Of course. It’s the only logical conclusion.”

And almost right after their mom walked in the door. She held a large satchel thrown crossbody and her hair was slicked back held in place with a little hairspray and a bunch of bobby pins. It was styled in a neat bun with her bangs framing her face perfectly. She had small black glasses and little silver earrings and had a simple matte red lipstick perfectly in place. She was wearing a light blue button up shirt and a black blazer with matching dress pants and flats. She looked perfectly put together as she tossed off her shoes and threw her bag onto the couch. She smiled at her kids and finally let herself slouch and look a little more like the mess she felt like.

“hi kids, how was school today?”

Roman shot a look at Logan before answering.

“well, um there was a lot, and though I want to tell you, Remus had a meltdown and we need help to get him back. Logan tried but he wouldn’t listen.”

“oh, geez ok um, Lo could you please grab my computer from my car? I have to finish something up later, and Ro could you pop the clam chowder on the stove? It was gonna go with dinner, but I know how much Rem loves it. Besides there should be plenty of the French mac that Mimi makes to feed us tonight. I’ll go work things out with him.”

“hey kiddo? Can I come in?”

Vivian Royale had a knack for pulling her kids out of their heads enough to actually fix problems, but her son Remus was usually rather self sufficient in that regard, while Logan and Roman both had anxiety and Roman had the rest stacked on top, Remus was rather neurotypical and usually had less issues that required her intervention. That was, until high school hit. His mental health took a rapid hit as soon as he had started high school, and no one quite knew what happened. She knocked on his door, waiting for his answer before stepping in.

“hey bud. What's wrong? I heard you had a bit of an outburst. Can you tell me what happened?”

Remus sat on his bed, a green octopus comforter laid on the bed and his Cthulhu plushie was in his grip. He hid his face in the toy as he mumbled something into it.

“Hun I'm gonna need you to speak up ok? We can’t fix anything if I don’t know what's wrong.”

“it’s dumb.”

“obviously its not to you. If it was it wouldn’t have affected you enough to cause you to yell at your brothers.”

“… I just- it’s so dumb I don’t wanna say it!”

“you're safe here Rem.”

“my friend got asked out by this lame dude in our class. And- and I think I have a crush on him. My friend I mean! And- and I don’t know what I'm supposed to do, I can’t tell him, what if he hates me? I just. I don’t know how to feel I just know it sucks.”

Vivian set a gentle hand on her sons’ shoulder and gave him a soft smile. She took his hand and gave it a squeeze.

“I understand Rem. That’s sort of how it felt when I realized I liked Mimi. I've known Mimi since we were kids and it wasn’t until after me and your dad broke up that I realized that I loved her. We were in our twenties and I had three newborns and my best friend jumped headfirst into that without hesitation. Is he actually going on the date?”

“no. he's not his type, I guess. That’s what he said at least.”

“then ask him out! He's not interested in them, and he called you to tell you. You obviously matter to each other, even if he doesn’t like you back, I don’t think it would change anything. Just go for it, what's the worst that could happen?”

“…you're right. I-I guess I’ll talk to him later.”

“atta boy!!! Now come on, Roman has clam chowder on the burner and Mimi should be home soon!”

The four of them sat down at the dining table eating and Logan and Remus recounted their day to their mom, Roman staying quiet for the time being, only wanting to say his announcement once. It was 15 minutes before Mimi got home in her fancy outfit. Her red hair was everywhere, curled and messy and absolutely her. She wore a black dress that had a cat head shape on it, with a pink bow at her waist and where the cats head didn’t cover was a see-through mesh. She had a light pink tank top under it and had a pink and white jacket about 2 sizes too big for her on around her shoulders. Her shoes were shiny pink stilettos that made a pretty click clack noise as she walked. She held a pretty black purse and she had little unicorn earrings that looked adorable with her pink lipstick and black to pink cat eye. She set her bag down on the table next to the door and slipped out of her shoes neatly setting them next to the door before slipping over to the table where everyone was sitting. She ruffled Roman and Remus’ hair before giving a big smile to them all.

“how are my boys doin? I see Viv pulled out the chowder, I hope everything is good!”

“I'm really gay!”

“me too Hun, what's new?”

They all let out a fit of giggles. Mimi went to serve herself a bowl of soup and Logan and Remus repeated their day back to her. When they had finished and Roman still hadn’t spoken, she leaned on her arm with a gentle smile and encouraged him to speak. He nodded and cleared his throat.

“um… it was pretty average all around, but this morning Mr. Sanders heard me singing and um, well he uh,”

Logan gave his hand a small squeeze from under the table. He swallowed and finally finished.

“he cast me as the lead in our coming musical.”

Mimi and his mom stopped mid bite of soup, staring at him intently and he wanted to melt through the floor. They swallowed their mouthfuls and looked at each other before turning back to him with wide smiles. Suddenly Logan and Roman clasped their hands over their ears as the two started squealing at the top of their lungs, Mimi jumping out of her seat, jumping up and down. when they finally stopped screaming, Mimi was still bouncing and had Vivian’s hand in hers.

“oh my god Roman!!! Our baby boy oh I'm so so proud of you!!!!!”

“Roman sweetheart, that’s incredible!!! Wait, but weren’t auditions last week?”

“yeah, um, he just had me sing and dance again and he gave me the part.”

“Roman that’s incredible!!!!!!!!! Oh, I knew it!!! Didn’t I tell you Vivi? Didn’t I tell you that Ro was gonna be an incredible performer? I remember, I remember when I first saw him when he was an itty-bitty peanut that I told you he was gonna be a star in the showbiz!!! Oh, he's our little star oh I'm so proud!!!!!!”

“yes, babe I remember, calm down you are going to make him explode! Roman I really am so proud of you honey.”

“oh, oh oh!!! Roman you should sing for us!!! You always stop singing whenever either of us enter the room, I want to hear you sing!!! If you're ok of course, no pressure”

Roman’s face was the shade of an apple. His stepmom was always over the top with support, but this was more than he expected. He was about to nod when he heard Logan make a confused noise.

“am I really the only person who has heard him sing? He never stops singing its like his default mode! He's always making music whether through his fidgets or humming or singing, I don’t know how you guys have missed it!”

“I mean, I do my best to keep people from hearing me but you're sorta the exception. You're calm and you won’t like, smother me.”

“… well then. I also vote for a song.”

“hold on, lets get dinner ready first and then we can fully focus on him”

They had sat down with their plates and Roman was playing with his ring to keep him calm as 4 pairs of eyes stared at him waiting to hear him sing. Logan gave him a small smile and that was enough to help him start.

As the smile fell from your face, I fell with it Our faces blue There's a heart stain on the carpet I left it, I left it with you Yeah, the truth is that I'm sorry Though I told you not to worry I'm just some dumb kid Trying to kid myself That I got my shit together So go, get to runnin', won't you hurry? While it's light out, while it's early Before I start to miss any part of this And change my mind, whatever

Logan’s smile widened as he recognized the song. Remus mom and Mimi sat still, with looks of… awe? He was too nervous to analyze their expressions while he was singing. He continued on.

I say I wanna settle down Build your hopes up like a tower I'm giving you the run around I'm just a lost boy Not ready to be found Not ready to be found I'm just a lost boy Not ready to be found

He let his eyes close and his body sway to the song playing along in his head. He didn’t see the looks his moms gave each other, he didn’t see Remus shove Logan with a jealous look screaming that he was bitter he hadn’t heard him sooner. He was absorbed in the song.

I don't care much for locks on the window To keep me at bay I'll leave you one last kiss on your pillow Before I fly away Yeah we knew from the beginning That this wasn't never ending Shouldn't stay too long Cause we're both too young To give into forever

So what are you waiting for? Cause someone could love you more I'm just a lost boy, lost boy So what are you waiting for? Cause someone could love you more I'm just a lost boy, lost boy So what are you waiting for? Cause someone could love you more I'm just a lost boy, lost boy So what are you waiting for? Cause someone could love you more I'm just a lost boy, lost boy

Roman quickly finished the song and hesitantly opened his eyes. The amazed faces that they all had completely floored him. Mimi got out of her seat and surrounded him in a hug, which was objectively adorable due to her barely reaching his collarbone. Remus had an odd look on his face with a mixture of awe and curiosity. Mom sat with a wide grin on her face that matched Logan’s. He felt happy and at ease and calm. And he felt much better about his new part in the musical seeing his family filled with some interesting type of pride.

Taglist: @fivebyfive-finebyfive @tacohippy56900 @analogical-mess @crookedlyoptimisticdestiny @angels-and-dreams @fandomloverangel @demented-dukey @karmels-stuff @demented-dukey (sorry if you didn’t want to be tagged, you seemed interested in it)

Let me know if you want to be tagged in my writing!!!

Thank you for reading I will see you later ladies lords and nonbinary royalty!!!

#roman sanders #logan sanders #duke remus #remus sanders #2 original characters mentioned #rolorem triplets au #familial creativitwins #familial logince #familial lomus #ocxoc #tw swearing #tw cursing #tw anxiety #tw argument #tw self deprecation #my writing #my fanfiction #chapter 2

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franeridart · 6 years

Note

what program/brushes do you use for your art? it's so damn pretty

Easy Paint tool SAI and the default pen/brush/marker tools, mostly! and thank you!!! ;^;

Anon said:When I was a kid I would've had a crush on Akane

HECK that’s such a compliment!! Thank you!!!

Anon said:Couldn't Akane technically Control/move Kiri's hair since it's dyed? I mean it's like his hair is stained meaning it's not alive! so Akane finally warms up to him and messes with him or plays with his hair?

She can and she did! I drew her doing just that both in the first and in the fourth thing I posted about her! :D

Anon said:okay i don't know if this is coming through but i have just looked through your entire blog(can only go 4 years back) and let me just say you are wonderful, I absoluty LOVE how you paint/draw like its sooo pretty??? like dnjwcfehbi i cant describe it, (part 1) || like you are wonderful, I absolutely LOVE how you paint/draw like it's so pretty??? like dnjwcfehbi I can't describe it like it's absolutely Fabulous, Stunning, Amazing, Lovely and it looks so smoooooth like what????how??But anyways love your art and love you keep being Amazing! (part 2)

AH GOD THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!! This is such a sweet ask to get TT^TT (and you can only go 4 years back because the blog is 4 years old! Can’t believe you actually went through it all!!)

Anon said:I really love your art style and your comics are so cute and I love how you draw older Bakugou and Kirishima!! It’s all so wonderful! Thank you for sharing it with everyone!

Oh man thank you!! ;;; I’m so happy yo know you like them!!!!!! TTOTT

Anon said:the level of FLUFF and KOOKIENESS and SOFT and MARSHMALLOW and MY HEART CAN'T TOOK THIS IS is so much I could die.

PLEASE DON’T DIE I LOVE YOU !!!!!

Anon said:I love everything about Akane's au. Her, her interactions with Bakugou, how she dislikes Kirishima but is beginning to warm up to him, the boys' aged-up designs. Everything. It's all amazing. Thank you for bringing it into my life!

Nggghhhhhhhh no anon thank you for liking her!!!!

Anon said:Currently procrastinating on my essay to go through your blog because it de-stresses me and I love your art so much like seriously h e l p

GAH THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! /////

Anon said:There's something I'm not understand in your AU children kiribaku. She adopted by bakugo or she is a kid bakugou have with someone. ( I'm really really sorry for my English )

Adopted!

Anon said:Your comics are so cute and funny! I'm loving the story with Akane, the last update was great! I really like the way you draw the characters, like your style is so nice. Thanks for making my day better with your art!

G o d thank you So Much!!!!!!

Anon said:Akane is adorable, and I absolutely love the comics that you upload of her, but also on top of that your mohawk Bakugo has cleared my skin, watered my crops, and brought me back from the dead at LEAST twice.

I’M REAL GLAD TO HEAR THAT because mohawk Bakugou owns my whole soul and it’s nice to know I’m not alone in that hahaha

Anon said:What are some ways Akane messes with Kiri (or used to) when he wears red clothes? Does she often do that? Does she do it when Baku's not home, or when he is so that she can hammer in just how much she dislikes Kiri? Has she ever done anything major that caused her to be really reprimanded by Baku, but being the best person in the world Kiri did not get angry?

She really only ever gets pissy (or used to! they’re starting to get along better !!!) at Kiri when she feels jealous for whatever reason, and that doesn’t happen as often as it seems through my doodles, so it’s not like she’s always antagonistic towards him! Mostly she just ignores him, so no, it doesn’t happen often at all! And she’s never gone further than messing his hair up or tugging a bit at his clothes, since she doesn’t have the strength to move Kiri all that much haha the only reason she managed to have him fall the first time was because he was balancing already, but generally Kiri weighs way too much for her to move him around or pull at the red stuff he’s wearing enough for him to notice it all that much

anyway, Baku never reprimended her for it - not more than he did in the first comic I posted with them, at least, specifically because the damage she can make is so minor that Kiri and Baku barely consider it something to tell her off for... if she were ever to act that way towards someone she might actually hurt (say, a kid her own age) then Baku might reprimend her more seriously, but as long as she’s just tugging at Kiri’s clothes they don’t see it as anything worth fighting her over :D

Anon said:Just sent an ask, so forgive me for this one, but I'd love to get this straight: in the Akane AU Kiri and Baku graduated and share an apartment, are madly into each other, but they neither has made a move on the other yet? Perhaps that should be sad, but it's 100% adorable.

I know I shouldn’t say this as I made the au myself, but I find the arrangement pretty dang adorable too haha they act like a married couple anyway, so it’s like... pining while the rest of the world already considers them an item? and the pining is mostly about stuff like ahhhh I wanna tell him I love him or ahhhhhh god I wanna kiss him, but then they’ll fall asleep on the couch together or hold hands just for the hell of it or cook for each other or make plans that always involve each other and all in all act as each other’s partner, so it’s mostly just like *Kaminari voice* “God these oblivious idiots” hahaha

Anon said:That latest Akane comic melted my heart like you often do. Though for a moment, I expected Eijirou to say "I don't want Katsuki to be my dad, I want him to be my daddy" XD Though that would not sound like him. Props for his adorable interactions with Scarlet Death Queen Witch.

Anon you don’t get it that’s exactly why I had him say “be his son” instead of “be my dad” LMAO it was like, a conscious wording decision hahaha thank you so much for liking my girl, btw!!!

Anon said:Fran! I was just wondering if you would be willing to post your Demon Kiri and Angel Baku art on Redbubble? I'd love to buy a print of it!! Totally understand if not. Also your newer Akane comics are killing me, they're so damn cute!! So yeah love you and your beautiful art! Hope you have an awesome year!!

I CAN TRY I think I did try last time I updated my rb? But the format of the pic made it hard to use it for a lot of things so I gave up??? I can try again tho!!! Thank you for being interested in buying it!!! And thank you for liking Akane too!!!!!

Anon said:is katsuki and kirishima not together in the adopted child comics or is there gonna be a plot to them getting together? 👀

I’m not really writing anything cohesive for it so I wouldn’t call it a plot point, but yeh they still aren’t together! And I wanna have them get to the point in which they are together!!! :D

Anon said:I'm gonna die why do you do this with your adorable art my god

PLEASE!!!!! DON’T DIE!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:Your Akane + KiriBaku comics are adorable and I love the relationships that exist between them. I can't wait to see more of them!

Thank you so much!!!!!!!!!!! I hope I won’t disappoint!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:I love your art so much!! Especially the little Akane au (so freaking cute!!!!). Random question: if you’ve ever seen Lucifer, who do you think would fit his character? Have an awesome day!

I haven’t seen it, sorry :((( but thank you for liking my girl!!!!!!

Anon said:I apologize if this has already been thought of but i feel as though when akane gets older and if she decides to be a hero, part of her costume could include useful red objects mayhaps?? Such as a shield or daggers or handcuffs so if there’s a lack of red around her she isn’t in a complete ditch. But i love your work sm ahhh💕💕

Yes!!! That’s the plan!!!!! I don’t think I’ll ever draw a teen version of her character but I MIGHT mention this idea in the current timeline, I like the idea so much TT^TT

Anon said:Hey there, I am absolutely obsessed with Akane like I love her so much wow but anyways I was wondering if you've ever drawn tododeku/ will in the future?

Thank you!!!! And I have drawn them in the past (under my tododeku tag!) and I might draw them again in the future, though currently I’m in a pretty big izu//ocha mood so I dunno when that will happen!

Anon said:I love your art so much like??? Help???

THANK YOU TTATT

Anon said:Y'know it could be gayer c'mon

This ask has been in my inbox for 17 days and I still don’t know what it means ??? but I laughed a lot when I got it so thank you anon and yes, definitely, everything could always be gayer that’s just how the world goes

Anon said:I swear you drew an older version of the krbk kids and it wasn't a fever dream I'm currently frantically searching through your blog rn help

I DID that post is CURSED anon, you can look it up through any of the tags I used to tag it and it won’t show up it won’t and I don’t know why!! I always lose it exactly because of this reason I have zero idea why it does this but??? okay I guess???????????

anyway if you still want it it’s here

Anon said:If Akane can control red things, does she low-key also have control over things that are pink and orange depending on how reddish in hue they are? I love her btw. Such a smol bean who could probably kick my ass!

What a good question you got there!! She has control over everything that has a color that falls in the red wavelength of the visible spectrum - that does include certain tones of pink and certain tones of orange, but there’s a point where orange gets too yellow or pink gets too white that her powers stop working. As long as the red in the color is more than any other hue, though, her powers work!

Anon said: im just imagining if baku takes akane with him when he is going to work and is there with kiri and akane help kiri with his hair bc she is suffering when he tries to style it himself

Once they start getting along better Akane and Kiri actually start helping each other with their hair! They’re both very particular about it so they understand each other as far as that topic goes haha

Anon said:Hi I just wanted to say I’m really enjoying what you are doing in your latest drawing. The contrast with the thick sketchy lines and the thinner crisp ones and the spaces that have no defined line! It’s cool to see you experiment with your line work while staying true to your natural style! Sorry if this came off weird but I love seeing talented artists try pushing the boundaries of their style it’s really visually/conceptually interesting! :)

AH MAN thank you so much I’m so happy to know you like that tool TT^TT it’s really super comfy to use, so it’s nice to know someone finds it visually appealing too!!! thank you!!!!!

Anon said:Is there any chance you could make a masterpost of the aus you do? It's a lot to scroll down to the beginning of a concept u have sometimes and it can be unclear when they start

They all have a tag they’re under, tho? If I’ve made more than one post about them! I have so many AUs going around that making a masterpost with all of them is a bit... mostly so since I don’t know for how many I’ll actually go back on! But if the tags don’t really work for you (generally the link is gonna look like https://franeridart.tumblr.com/tagged/[here goes the tag]/chrono to have it in chronological order) then I can try? I can’t promise I’ll find a comfortable way to do this, tho orz sorry!

Anon said:This might be an odd ask but does Akane like Jirou? I feel like they would get along really well. And how about her grandma Mitsuki? Since she takes after Katsu who takes after her, they could make an adorably angry trio

She hasn’t spent much time with Jirou yet so right now she’s mostly meh about her (though right now she only actually likes Bakugou, and she’s warming up to Kiri, but that’s about it). She doesn’t mind Mitsuki, but she hasn’t spent too long with her either! She yells a bit too much at her dad tho, which Akane isn’t particularly fond of (protective bean that she is, she doesn’t get that that’s just their way of communicating just yet), so out of her grandparents she prefers Masaru, after all~

#fran answers #a bunch of asks i had forgotten about after closing the inbox!!!#jesus im a disaster #i was sure i had a couple asks more in here but i can't find them so...???#ah well #either way i'm sorry these took so long my brain is seriously all over the place lately #go d s #anonymous

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