yuuta exhibits such previously abandoned, recently adopted dog behavior. incredibly anxious all the time, even though nobody’s out to get him or leave him behind. waits for you to return home or from school or from work excitedly, just to see you when you walk through the door. follows you around senselessly, hovering in your space just for the sake of companionship. initiates affection in prodding ways—starts off next to you, then a hand on your thigh, then deems it safe to lay all the way down, then slowly pushes his head into your lap. gets up whenever you need to get up, and resumes his position as soon as you’re ready. brings you gifts as a sign that he’s thinking of you, and maybe because he likes the affection it brings out in you, maybe because he likes the gentle affirming touches of a hand in his hair or a pinch to his cheek. rests his head on your stomach or his chin on your shoulder when he’s sleepy, stays there, immobile, and will not move unless absolutely necessary. sometimes he gets surprised when he hears you calling for him, there’s a moment of disbelief as he thinks “me? really? you need me?” but it’s very quickly overshadowed by this compulsive need to show up, to please, to do anything for you, which is why he always answers when you call. he doesn’t realize that he has puppygod eyes, especially when he’s excited or confused, but he does and it’s incredible endearing. very reluctant to share your space or attention after a while, considers that to be sacred and he won’t risk being let go or lost again, so as a safety precaution, he keeps himself right by you, waits for you always.
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you are too full of life and love to be half loved by someone. you deserve a love that feels satiating for your spirit. you deserve a love that makes you feel seen. you deserve a love that makes you feel heard. you deserve a love that listens and a love that is patient. you deserve a love that is kind and a love that feels warm. you deserve a love that makes your heart explode and a love that sends shivers down your spine. you deserve a love that takes the time to study you, that takes the time to understand your mind. you deserve a love that is patient and compassionate. you deserve a love that grows old. you deserve a love that doesn’t judge but instead accepts you wholeheartedly; flaws and all. you deserve a love that sends tingles through your whole body and leaves butterflies swarming in your stomach. you deserve a love that gives you 80 on the days that you can only give 20. you deserve a love that sends you into overdrive at the slightest thought of their touch. you deserve a love that lasts. you see how you simply read this, you deserve a love that is simple and extraordinary all in one. you deserve to be felt, you deserve to be loved. you deserve love.
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this image is so important to me…. idk who the artist is so if anyone knows, please oh please lmk so i can credit them :3
credit!: tesazombie (they're deactivated as of yet!, still important to credit them tho)
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i was rewatching episode 5 for edit purposes and i realised something.
here lydia is talking about the kiss, but it has a deeper meaning.
i can’t get out of my mind the fact that yes, she found cynthia annoying from the start, but it was the endearing kind of annoying. (or maybe that’s just my ship goggles.) because if you look back at episode 3, the first time they meet, and pay close attention to the expressions lydia makes in the background when the drama teacher is telling cynthia that she’s now a martian, there's no trace of hate or disgust.
like, hello?? that’s flirting. (or maybe i would just swoon if someone looked at me like that.) and what about their rivarly?
does this look like she’s angry at cynthia? to me, she seems mildly annoyed, but also interested. no one’s ever questioned her, and now this butch comes along and proves her wrong. but lydia doesn’t really understand how she feels about cynthia yet. she tries to re-establish her power in episode 4, but cynthia once again overthrows her.
and now yes, she is angry, and confused. ever since cynthia’s joined drama club she has brought nothing but chaos in the established hierarchy, and in lydia’s mind: why can’t she stop thinking about her?
is it hate, mere superficial attraction (see the “flirting” above), or something more?
she has to get it over with, quickly. “the quicker you get something over with, the less of a deal it becomes in your mind”. she needs to put a stop to these thoughts: what’s the quickest way to?
stage kisses are meaningless. she obviously isn’t crushing on cynthia, just like she felt nothing for all the people she kissed on stage. thus the straightforward scientific experiment: she’ll kiss cynthia, she’ll be sure she feels nothing, and all will go back to normal. she’ll stop obsessing over cynthia. right?
rehearsing romeo and juliet is the best excuse ever. because no one can convince me she didn’t follow cynthia in an empty room (where guests shouldn’t enter) to test her theory, and then jumped at the opportunity. (like why else would she follow them? if not to flirt? which to her means bullying them, because she’s a mean lesbian.)
but her plan backfired. and now she knows she’s got an actual crush. on cynthia.
while cynthia, sweet cynthia, thinks they just love acting.
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i might get some hate for this depending on where this post goes but i think lesboys are so valid and the discourse about them is so ridiculous. like you guys shouldn't have to deal with all that and it frustrates me that people throw hissy fits over an identity that literally does not affect them at all.
"but men cant be lesbians-" wrong. butch lesbians and trans men have a really closely connected history with each other that practically intersects and you should really do some research on that before you make blanket statements, not to mention that gender and sexuality is weird and wobbly and fluid and a very personal experience. it means a different thing to each person. being a man can be something completely different and saying stuff like this ignores people like demiboys, demigirls, genderfluid and genderflux people etc. these people will really preach "demolish the gender binary!! love is love!!" until someone's relationship with gender and sexuality is a little too freaky for them to handle and be challenged by lmaoo
"ohhh but what about the cishet men who say they're lesbians to prey on women-" YEAH WHAT ABOUT THEM????? THIS AIN'T ABOUT THEM BRO!!!!! this argument also REEKS of terfy "trans women are just predatory men!!!111!!1" rhetoric and it grosses me out. yeah some men are gross and do try to pull this but that does not negate someone's entire identity completely just because of a few bad actors, you know that right? actual black and white behaviour.
queer discourse is silly and i don't know why it's a thing. just let people exist. it isn't that hard. we have worse things to worry about than whether someone calls themselves a lesboy or not. i think we need to unplug our ears and yank our heads out of the sand and remember that the queer community is what it is because of our unique and amazing diversity. arguing over labels like school children isn't gonna help that. damn.
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Shuffle your favorite playlist and post the first five songs that come up. Then copy/paste this top ask your favorite mutuals. 💛
Tagged by @greypetrel <3
Thank you so much dear!! Hopefully the playlist I've chosen gets me diverse genres °-°''
"Unbroken (Hotel Baby)" by Monster Magnet
"Breaking Me Down" by Soil
"A Secret Place (2004 remastered)" by Megadeth
"Descent - Aftermath" from the DAI Descent DLC soundtrack
"Tooth Fairy" by Nanowar of Steel
...and it didn't. hahahah
I mean, except the Descent suite which is like, my favorite soundtrack throughout the games << at risk of being controversial, I prefer it to the Trespasser one. They're both gorgeous of course, but I can't really command my preferences
I'm tagging: @underneathestars @daggerbean @layalu @m-bj @n7viper and whoever feels like sharing some music u-u
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calling my character hyperfixations ‘blorbos’ isnt enough, i literally think i need to drag them out of their reality and link them and i up to a machine that allows us to encrypt and intertwine our dna and atoms together. i need to inhale their entire existence and keep them in the confines of my lungs for eternity.
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