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#(I know why but I get on my own nerves)
lillotte17 · 2 months
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#not gonna make a real post but i gotta vent a little#there was that one poll abt which DA man has the most annoying fans#which i did not vote in bc as someone who values my own sanity i don't hang out in tags of characters that get on my nerves#but i'm just dumb enough to have looked in the notes and apparently solas was sweeping i guess#which by itself is whatever#but then the tags were just dozens of ppl complaining that solas fans were annoying bc they *checks notes*#post about solas a lot???#and 'flood the lavellan tag'? you know...the only character you can romance him with w/o a mod???#and they hate that we're 'acting like DA4 is going to only be abt him'...you know. the game originally called 'dreadwolf'#idk my guys i get that if someone jumps on your post and makes it abt a character u hate that's annoying#but it sure sounds like ur just bitching abt ppl having fun in their own fandom space#this sounds very much like a YOU issue#like i remember someone literally made a post like 'UGH why do Solavellans even like him?!' that ended up on my dash#and I answered in good faith not feeling like i was being mean or aggressive#and i promptly got yelled at for 'not staying in my lane'#my brother in Christ YOU asked MY part of the fandom a question#Not saying there aren't Solas fans w/ Rancid Takes but i swear half the complaints i see are people just mad that we're having a good time#curate your own online experience guys it's not that hard#i waited 10 years for closure with this dumpster fire man#and no one is going to spoil my fun about it#block me to the moon and back idc
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kylos-starlight · 5 months
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lol I get really really annoyed by the fucking K.y.lo fans because a lot of the time it would be a different movie (Like 65 for example) and they would be "Oh it's just ben solo! He didn't die!" or "this is kylocoded etc" They do shit like that with Jude, Mills, Phillip, and Charlie (probably AD other characters too) and can you just fucking not? NONE OF THEM ARE THE SAME PERSONALITY WISE, like NONE of them!!!!
Just because it's the same actor it isn't the same fucking character, they're all very very different characters and it just makes me sad and irritated if I'm being honest..
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hey hey when Paul (or whoever that was writing the book of Hebrews) tells us not to complain or God might strike us dead, how do we separate that from toxic positivity
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skitskatdacat63 · 8 months
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Every boy king painting is just like: hey guys fo you wanna see the same idea rehashed over and over again?
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seraphonfire · 9 months
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i should probably get that checked
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swordmaid · 11 months
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for me… FOR ME..!!! and for shri’iia specifically the lock in for astarion’s romance is his graveyard scene in act 3.
i think it is too quick for shri’iia to be moving on to another relationship considering her previous one was with her mistress who essentially groomed and isolated her for like … more than hundred years. learning to chase her own desires and not moulding herself to what anyone wants her to be is something so new to her…!!! and something that she’s still learning how to be comfortable with….
and what I like abt romancing astarion with her is that I usually go for the dialogue path in his act 2 confession scene where you can ask him:
- what do YOU want to do?
and he goes like honestly idk what we’re doing but /this/ is nice. it just feels like two people exploring the option to love for the first time and taking things in their own pace rather than jumping straight into the relationship. they’re going at a snails pace… they don’t know what they’re doing but they like this feeling and the vibe and they want to more of it but they’re not ready to commit to anything yet and it’s fine for them …!! and they’re only committing by the end in the graveyard scene where significant time has passed and they’ve learnt a little more about themselves and they’re both more confident about their own desires and also how they want to be loved.
like it is so fitting I think… and sweet… not to mention astarion being a high elf & a vampire and shri’iia being a drow, they have all the time of the world for themselves so I def think they would want to take their time. except if shri’iia turns into a mindflayer or drider by the end then that plan is out the window lol
#now I’m thinking who else I can romance with her .. maybe lae’zel ??#since the thing with her is that she doesn’t get vulnerable in act 1 so the scenes where the romances#are kind of heart to hearts like shadowheart’s or karlach’s (😭😭😭) is out of the question since it doesn’t fit her …#like she’d rather sleep with someone first than actually get to know them 😭 hence astarion and lae’zel …#gale and wyll… I am hmmm about it on one hand her approval with wyll in act 1 is not even high enough 😭😭#and I don’t think she can be sweet enough to chase after him in the party .. she was kind of like ok fine whatever when he said he’s not in#the mood … gale I think can be a contender .. I actually don’t know how his route goes so I’m not sure abt that …#but the thing is … she gets vulnerable LATER ..!! and why astarion’s romance work for her is i hc after their act 2 scene#they’re just in a situationship rather than actual relationship … like they’re dating (yes!) but also dating (hmmmm)#and it’s only in his last scene where they both lock in bc I think that’s enough time for her to process her OWN trauma and also for her#own character development … like she has to learn how to trust (ack!!!!) which is the thing that you don’t do when you’re raised in lolth’s#cult …. and her mistress manipulated her trust too so it’s even more nerve wracking for her bc she doesn’t want someone to have that power#over her again .. but now she has to learn how to give it away freely … without being scared … bites my hand …!!!!#and astarion graveyard scene where he wants to live again vs shri’iia learning how to trust again and trying to live without the fear of#someone betraying you and using you and the paranoia that comes with it … urck urgh goughhhhhh critical hit …#also I have a hc that she actually is quite good at making poisons since her mother sold alchemy herbs and components#and she gives him poison as a courting gift lol .. also like a way to protect him 🤭 but she won’t admit that … she’s like if you want it#take it if you don’t idc 🤷‍♀️ (she does..) i hc that she gets flustered at sincerity actually#their relationship for me is like they’re both two little shits and a general menace to society (both charlatans)#but if they had to hold hands she’d get too flustered too and he’s like honestly what are you a child? (smug face making fun of her)#I have this little comic idea for them when they held hands for the first time and she’s like ouggghhh 😳😮‍💨 flustered and sweating and he’s#like hihi 🤭😎 but then their hands starts to get sweaty and then he’s like ew that’s disgusting and she’s like ok if u hate it let go then#and he’s like no YOU let go 🙄 but they don’t let go now they have to suffer through the sweaty hand holding alas such is fate …
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miscreantahead · 4 months
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thinking about when i forgot my phone the other day so i couldn't play spotify in my car and switched to the radio and immediately creepy celebrity gossip
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badolmen · 6 months
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So funny how trauma will just kick you in the fucking teeth with the most random triggers.
#ra speaks#personal#watched the most recent quintin reviews vid which like yeah I went in with expectations of the content#and it’s not like I actively avoid stuff that depicts/discusses abuse I’ve been going to therapy long enough to know my most sensitive#triggers and stuff. but…idk something abt when he got to the drake bell section just set me off something fierce.#I’m all nerves and stress and self loathing/misplaced guilt from my own past bullshit#like brain can we please cool it we’ve been over this for years why you freaking the fuck out now? (I mean. logically. I know why#and how trauma works and that I’m just having emotional flashbacks but still. ugh.)#brain please be real niceys to me I have a meeting in an hour we cannot be having a panic attack.#you’re safe you’re good it wasn’t your fault etc etc can we please go back to being an adult more than a decade past all that? please???#survived my meeting so I’m gonna vent abt this a bit more bc. let’s be real.#I don’t rememember a solid 3 years of my adolescence and it fucks w me sometimes.#I remember things before 4th grade. I remember 4th grade. then bam I’m in 8th going to high school. and like#I know logistically what happened. I know emotionally I hated/was so fucking scared of [redacted] until I finally left that fucking school.#it’s just. frustrating bc if I remembered maybe I’d feel more justified letting myself get upset abt it. but I don’t so suck it up buttercup#it probably wasn’t even that bad if you don’t actually remember it so pull it together.#hell for all you know it had nothing to do with [redacted] and you were just on bad meds/depressed and forgot three solid years of your life#after meeting [redacted] <- I am not convincing myself unfortunately.
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hauntingsofhouses · 6 months
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hi, it's me. the fic writer that uses culturally-specific idioms in a very different cultural time setting and keeps confusing words like reign and rein. this is my story.
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gifti3 · 6 months
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Im cursing [REDACTED] right NOW
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#god i better never have contact with this guy again or i might flip out on him#im about to ramble about my past “dating" adventures (we were casual but sheesh cant even be friends with this guy tbh)#im realizing months later how much this guy i used to talk to sucked#like DUDE be a better or stay single FOREVER (ΘдΘ)#and by that i mean learn how to better handle approaching others feelings!#god the way he would just shutdown others ppls feelings and it was just an endless loop of “that doesnt make sense” or “thats dumb”#sure emotions can be irrational but if someone is desperately TRYING to explain why they feel a way (even if theyre struggling to be clear)#maybe dont be so dismissive#like literally one time i was annoyed cause talking to him was grating on my nerves#and i was like ik it doesnt make sense so let me step away cause im annoyed#and hes like trying to logic me out of my annoyance???#like worstie im literally walking away so i can cool off#leave it be!#god looking back on all this....#i hope to god whoever hes talking to (if hes talking to anyone) isnt dealing with similar things#ppl can change so ill just hope for that#or maybe he'll meet his match#someone who reflects the same energy he has!#tho im not sure if hed like that haha#the guy seemed to have a lot of relationship problems in general (romantic and platonic) and i wanted to have the benefit of the doubt#but now im thinking maybe his personality was also just clashing with everyone elses#which isnt necessarily a bad thing on its own#gotta get context for everything u know#but in this case....naur#like im a pretty anxious person so how ppl i care about will react to what im doing or saying is constantly at the back of my mind!#so ppl who just come off as flippant about my fee fees annoy me fr#im like “ahh what if i upset so and so” constantly#trying to make sure not to make things harder for them#and they cant even spare me a single thought before doing something and dismiss me when i get upset#but also they wanna come to me when theyre feeling sad about something???
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the-trans-dragon · 1 year
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I need a doctor who has the patience, experience, humor, and directness to listen to whatever new treatment ideas I've concocted, and then either say "Alex, that's a stupid fucking idea, let me explain why," or "The risks are acceptable in my professional opinion. Let's go over pros and cons and then you can think about it and decide what to do."
I just think it would be fun. For me. And I wish I could find a doctor who would also find that fun. I already came up with one fun Treatment for an Illness and have been successfully using it to treat The Illness for almost a YEAR, and all the side effects are awesome so like...I am certainly full of hubris at this point.
#i dont wanna say what i take or what im treating bc its like...well...zero doctors recommended it lol. and two doctors said “that might work#but uhhhhh i dont think im the right doctor for that.“ wait. three doctors said that. but i asked the third doctor ”pwease. youre the third#doctor to tell me to go to a different doctor. i need help.“ (i was fucking desperate. i was missing so many days of work that i basically#lost an entire paycheck's worth of money in two months and like. i had also SPENT that much on the doctors who inevitably ran out of their#own ideas and then recommended i go elsewwhwre to try my idea WHICH IS FAIR but also all 3 doctors did agree it was worth a shot so like....#i kinda needed ONE of them to actually. try it. it just took 6 months for the first one to run out of ideas and then another two or three#months to get in to see my genderal physician and then see a doctor he recommended who then recommended i go elsewhere and thats the doctor#who i was like “youre the third doctor to say that...i dont know who else to try.” goodness im glad she helped. my medicine is like $15 a#month (it was $10 when i had insurance) and i am in love with every single “side effect” and!!!! yea it has given me a large sum of hubris.#anyways.) i wanna do that again but with my other Significantly Disabling Illness. like why not lol. im already on 3 medicines that are#recommended to *not* take together (none of which are the medicine i chose to take aldjskds) so like.............seems like we#are at a “just try shit out and see what happens” stage. doctors should send me resumes and ill pick the one that looks most fun and then#we will do fun science together on my nerves system :) itll be fine lol. am i serious or kidding? i have no idea.#sorenhoots
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kuhatoarchive · 2 years
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tifa jumps off the train first btw. always, always.
#it's not about girlbossery it's about asserting her conviction as an established avalanche member#it's about courage as an act of being afraid yet doing smth regardless#the og handles the scene so well.. tifa calling the situation scary‚ cloud questioning if she really has the nerve &#asking why she came in the first place#which prompts her to get out of her own head. all it takes is a question‚ a nudge#at the end of the day‚ by participating she Consents to the fact unforeseen events can always happen during a mission#glimpses of tifa's mixed feelings shouldn't come at the expense of weakening her resolve to /push/ past her fear. squenix are u DUMB#that is arguably one of her most defining character traits in the ENTIRE narrative??!?!#otherwise it leaves the player thinking‚ 'what if cloud hadnt been there?' which..girl. She Has Been Doing This Well Before He Came Back#or worse‚ 'why did she agree to avalanche‚ again?' and not in the character-examination way#which is Such a rich question under the right lense..#yes‚ she wishes she didn't have to do this. even if it's not her first mission it still makes her nervous. she's allowed to‚ she's human#but shinra is so oppressive and she holds so‚ so much Hatred that it manifests in unpalatable ways#and she's Willing to do all this morally dubious shit‚ not to mention RISKY#jumping off a damn moving train is not the exception!!!!!!!!#um. this was supposed to be a simple 'tifa jumps first‚ the remake skinship moment is‚ characterization wise‚ a let down' post#but it got out of my hands JGFJFG#just.. know that i don't really acknowledge it on my remake verse. the implications r not worth the fanservice#chara study.
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tyrannuspitch · 1 year
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i hate performance anxiety why is having hobbies SCARY!!! i am literally just a creature trying to live!!!
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consolecadet · 2 years
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Man, I remember being like 16 and thinking "my trauma history is already so long and queer that most therapists are not going to get it without a lot of tedious and upsetting explanation. This sucks" and now so much absurd shit has happened to me, trauma and otherwise, that it seems silly even to try
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explode-this · 4 months
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this-doesnt-endd · 5 months
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Anyways ive been having a lot more headaches and like yeah its kinda the territory w having major head trauma and epilepsy but ive gotten quiet a lot in the past few weeks way more than the past few months and they get debilitating and if it happens out and about it sucks cause they last incredibly long and im essentially hostage to the whim of it and if itll go away or if my meds for it will help or not and itll ruin what im doing and i cant help it or fix it
#and like ill have to stop and sit or leave and they get bad and i cant think and itll rub my eyes or my head and im getting flustered#and my face gets itchy and sometimes im in near tears cause it hurt and i look miserable and i hate it if im in public cause it feels like#look at this girl having a near meltdown how rude and inconsiderate if im with people#and like i said its debilitaing i cant think i feel awful sometimes i can bearly get words out so it seems like im getting mad or short#with people and its like no sorry my head is abt to explode im not trying to be mean or snobby but i feel like it comes across that way#but i simply dont know what to do and im so tense and it hurts and i could probably snap a brick im half and like sometimes its like just#like a hazard like ill be tripping over my own feet or my instinct is to close my eyes and like the other night when i went rollerskating it#came on and i just shut my eyes and i couldnt get myself to skate straight and i felt like i lost my sense of orientation in space and thats#just straight up unsafe for everyone which is why im kinda like avoiding learning to drive as well#idk im gonna bring it up with my neurologist it just sucks in general but also sucks cause im so young w at times very serious neuro issues#and nerve issues and like i know people have it worse or other things just as bad or worse and i feel like sometimes i complain abt it#too much and i shouldnt or that i shouldnt be upset with it but it makes me very upset
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