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#. . . also I don't think I've ever drawn those two standing right next to each other
mewkwota · 4 months
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A Rare Moment
This is kind of a silly comic, but I ended up making it kinda cute at the same time. During my Harmony of Dissonance run I never found the Rare Ghost but by some crazy chance I happened to come across it once in Maxim Mode. I still haven't found it normally.
This was the only monster Juste couldn't find on his journey, so Maxim decided to lend a hand logging it in. How sweet of him, no? ^^
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cerridwen007 · 10 months
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The Two of Us.
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Pairing: Javier Peña x f!reader.
Word count: 1.3k
Summary: Third part to the Javi x f!reader situationship series. Follows the morning after reader and Javi fuck after being apart for a month. Reader lays out all her feelings on the table hoping Javier will too.
Inspired by the song "The Two of Us" by Omar Apollo.
Warnings/Notes: ANGST, FLUFF, Swearing, no use of y/n, bad Spanish.
A/N: It's finally here, the third part of the trilogy. I am pretty happy with how it turned out and am so thankful for all the feedback and love I've gotten on the series. This is the first series I've managed to complete and has definitely motivated me to finish and write more series. I was thinking of maybe adding some smut in here as well but decided to add a whole bunch of tooth rotting fluff instead. Also, I have an idea for an angsty prologue of the lead up to "She" that I might post in the next week or so once I finish writing and editing it, which I plan on having smut return in that. As always, comments, likes, and reposts are very much appreciated. I hope you enjoy it!
Part 1: She. Part 2: Her.
***********
Sunlight flutters through your curtains as you wake. You smile to yourself as you remember the warm passions of last night. The smile quickly fades when you realize Javier isn't in your bed. A tear threatens to escape the corner of your eye, but you don't let it. You weren't going to cry over a man this morning.
The threat of tears instantly disappears, when you walk into your kitchen and see Javier standing there shirtless making breakfast and coffee for you both. Your heart instantly melts and begins to flutter at the rare sight of domestic Javi before you. Before you even realize what you're doing, you come up behind him and hug his back tightly.
"Mmmh, good morning handsome." You coo while holding him closely.
He leans back into your touch and holds your hands in his.
"Good morning, mi amor....sleep well?"
"Great, thank you...and yourself?"
"The best sleep I've had in a while, actually."
You smile and plant soft kisses on his back, making Javier chuckle.
"Careful Hermosa, I might end up burning our breakfast if you carry on like that."
You giggle. "That wouldn't be the worst thing ever."
You both laugh, and he turns around to hug you and kiss your forehead. He holds you close and turns back around to stir the scrambled eggs. You hold each other close till Javier finishes cooking, and you help him bring your plates and glasses to the table.
You're both all smiles as you eat your breakfast till a sudden realization hits you. Is this just you doing what you had before, fuckbuddies and nothing more?
A tear wells at the corner of your eye as you look at the man before you, as much as you love your physical, sexual relationship you still wanted and needed more for him.
You wanted to be his forever and wanted him to be yours too. His eyebrows squeeze together as he looks at your thinly drawn mouth and watery eyes.
"Are you alright, sweetheart?"
As much as you try to stop the tears from escaping a single tear falls down your cheek. He reaches up to you and wipes it away gently with his hand, cupping your jaw.
"I.....I.. want you, Javier."
"Cariño... you have me. Here, right now."
"I meant I want you....I want this... I want us...forever... more than what we were before."
He looks uncomfortable as he clears his throat.
"And I know that you probably don't want that, but I don't think we can continue whatever this is, if you don't feel the same way.....I can't let myself fall in love with you more and more everyday...knowing that you won't ever love me back."
His mind becomes clouded with all the aspects of being in a relationship with you. Waking up to your beautiful smiling face every morning, kissing down your body, coercing those beautiful sounds out of you every night. Maybe even one day settling down on his dad's ranch with you, little Peñas running around.
But then his slight smile slips off his face when he thought about you two fighting, everyday when he comes home from work, him accidently taking his anger from his job home to you and the narcos finding where you lived and murdering you because of him.
He couldn't seem to form a proper sentence with all the thoughts getting mixed up in his head. You reached out and placed your hand on his across the table, rubbing it comfortingly.
"Javi, look at me."
He looks up at you, with those big, brown, baby cow eyes, making your heart melt.
"Tell me what you're thinking.”
His throat closes preventing all the words from spilling out.
“Tell me…do you..do you love me Javier?” You say, voice breaking.
His heart thunders away in his chest as his mouth goes dry. Another tear falls down your cheek, you bite your lip to stop it from quivering.
“I…I… love you, querida.”
Your heart skips a beat. Confusion and anger fill your veins, unconvinced of his admission.
“Don’t say that you love me if you don't Javi…Don’t fucken play with my feelings so you can keep fucking me!” You spit at him, getting up to leave the table.
He looks at you distraught. He gets up and grabs your wrist firmly.
You angrily stare at him as you try to pull away from his grip but he doesn't let go. He pulls you closer to him and firmly grabs your jaw with his other hand so you will look at him.
“Look at me Hermosa.”
He swallows deeply, while his eyes dart back and forth across your face. His voice trembles a little as he speaks, so unused to admitting his feelings. You bite your tongue to hold back the angry, sad tears that blur your vision.
“I- the reason that I didn't say I loved you back before was because I was afraid.”
Your expression softens his words.
“I have never loved anyone since Lorraine who I left at the altar and looking back I don't even know how much I loved her …..I left though cause I was afraid and I'm still afraid…for different reasons this time.”
He pauses a second to see your saddened expression focused on his lips.
“I'm afraid that you will get sick of me and leave me…I'm afraid that once you see all of me, the flaws and all you will hate me. I'm afraid that I won’t be a good partner, won't give you enough attention or love and that you will grow to hate me. I’m afraid that my job will get in between us, that I'll take my stress and anger out on you, that the narcos will hurt you to get to me….. I’m afraid that I'll lose you.”
He feels his eyes start to water, and to hide his vulnerable state, he lets go of his hold on you and turns away. Your heart begins to physically hurt seeing Javier hurt in front of you.
“Hey.” you softly tell him. “ I can't say that won’t ever lose me, cause we both know that’s not true, but I know that I'll still love you even with all your flaws and that I won't get sick of you.”
He turns around and looks into your eyes as you continue speaking.
“You’re a good man Javier, more than you know or think, I know you always do your best but I also know that you're too hard on yourself, that you beat yourself up too much over things out of your control.”
You close the gap between the two of you and hold his hand gently.
“Being in a relationship is hard - for anyone, and I'm sure that we could make it work by both putting in effort and talking to each other about what we need and want.”
You take a deep breat and close you eyes for a second, feeling the last of your anger dissipate.
“I can’t promise you that you won't lose me in one way or another, but I can promise that I'll love you for as long as I live. And I would rather spend a short life in your arms than a long life without you.”
He gulps hard and looks at you. You slowly pull him into a hug and rest your head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat. He shakily exhales as he wraps his arms around you and lets his head fall onto the top of your head, breathing in your hair.
You hold each other close, swaying softly and relishing in the warmth of each other. Before Javier breaks the silence, speaking softly.
“I really do love you. Mi amor, I love you more than you will ever know.”
You lift your head to look at him and plant a soft kiss to his lips.
“I love you too, Javier. I'm yours forever.”
You both smile softly before kissing each other gently. The comforting taste of each swapped onto your own tongues. Your hands holding each other tightly, almost afraid to let go.
You don't know what was to come from here but you were just happy to be in his arms. It was the start of a new chapter for you and Javi. One where you would get to experience him wholly, just as you needed to.
************
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okay so idk if i've mentioned it here yet, but for the last few weeks at least, someone has been stealing the stickers off my locker at school. okay, yes, by now they're self-drawn scraps of paper, but my point still stands.
now, we've been having some sort of fight. i put new stickers up. within the next week or so, they tear them off again.
at some point, i was absolutely fed up. i left challenging to angry and rude stickers specifically addressing the sticker thief.
now, yesterday, i found my "sticker thief fuck off" sticker ripped up and taped to my locker with some dark blue pencil handwriting on it. me and a couple others have all been trying to decipher it ("your [?] is in the bin sticker" or something? your annoying stickers are in the bin? your new [?] is in the bin sticker???? well the meaning got across). additionally, i found A Number of my stickers spread over various other lockers in the same hallways as mine, randomly, partially upside-down
since yesterday, since i got an answer and the thief had the fucking balls to spread my stickers around and throw some away AGAIN, STILL, this hasn't left me any peace. especially since today they were scattered again, and one on the fucking clock (my friend helped me get up there and put it back onto my locker).
i am past being livid. i am annoyed beyond comprehension. i will keep this up for my remaining time at this school and i have started mass producing some of my stickers to stash them in my locker and immediately replace those missing, but i'm tired of it, too. i don't fucking want to do this. who the fuck thinks this is funny and why don't they just get a fucking hobby.
driven by a growing unrest, despite no need to, i go to my locker during a shorter break.
guess what i hear.
"we have to put them higher up, she's small"
OKAAY I AM LISTENING. ever since yesterday i've been eyeing everyone around these lockers with great suspicion. i am tense and tired and fucking done.
"i put one on the switch back there", accompanied by giggling.
i go the few steps and whaddya know, my 161 sticker.
MOTHERFUCKERS. the sticker thieves have been identified--two girls, a few years younger than me. those. spoilt. brats. and i have more choice words for them. i'm the bigger person tho. i literally just want my stickers.
i am also wholly unprepared for a confrontation, though my next plan of action was to demand one. still, i'm absolutely garbage with faces and I JUST HEARD THEM i have to take this chance.
so i step right up and ask them if they're the ones who keep stealing my stickers. now, in the following conversation, i probably could have been more secure in myself or whatever but just the fact that i'm talking to them and i know seems to be intimidating. at least while i feel caught off guard, i do feel in the position of more power in this conversation, if not by much.
they pull the ol' "it was just a joke." well guess what. i don't think it's funny. keep your hands off other peoples' lockers. they started just talking with each other quietly and i glared and eventually left. i hope just the fact that a direct confrontation has happened is enough to keep them the fuck away.
if not, by god, i will search the entire goddamn school building until i recognise them and leave a nice big message on that one girls' locker with super glue. i know which one it is.
i won't do anything more if they let me be. i have enough problems going on. just this caught me on the wrong foot today and for some reason (we're gonna blame puberty and hormones) that had me scrambling for composure once i got away and i don't want to drag it out more than necessary.
but fuck those girls. seriously. i hope they get a fucking hobby and some bloody manners. and hurray to being at the right place at the right time and, hopefully, an end to this week-long fight over my stickers.
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ray-ray-writings · 3 years
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i don't really know how this thought came to me but consider a reader who's a pillager hybrid of their whole family are pillagers but the reader doesn't really... agree with their lifestyle so they run away and move to the Dream SMP and no one knows they're pillager origins until their family comes looking for them?? also i've been binging ur stuff, i love ur blog, this is my first time asking :)
I really really love this idea, I’m such a sucker for things like this hahahaha.
But yeah. So you’re born and raised in a Pillager tower, your mother was a human that your father fell in love with once he saw her being cruel to villagers. Growing up you were always taken on the raids when your parents would go on and you would watch as Villagers were slaughtered left and right with no mercy. It always made you feel sick to your stomach while many others were having the time of their lives. When the raid was over and won, you would go back to the tower and people would marvel in their victories, and you would pretend you were also excited, but those nights were always plagued with nightmares of the villagers’ screams and fire that destroyed the towns. As you grew up, you were able to make your own decisions. So you went on less raids, still going on some to please your parents, but the guilt grew more and more with each town destroyed. So when you finally turned 18, you decided to leave for good. You packed up everything that you could carry in your inventory and wrote a small note to your parents explaining that you had to leave, you couldn’t raid and pillage any longer. You left the note on your mother’s nightstand, pressing a small kiss to both of their foreheads before leaving the only place you’ve ever called home. 
You wander for the whole night, the mobs leaving you alone (after all, like kind recognizes like) and then for half the day once the sun comes up before you stumble into the SMP. From far off in the distance you can see multiple beacons of light coming from inside a really really big stone building. So like a moth, you’re drawn to the light and wander inside this castle. You stumble onto a wooden plank path that seems to go everywhere are the new town you have found. As you’re walking through the castle just looking around, you aren’t paying attention and you stumble, literally stumble, into someone. You catch yourself before you fall and you look to who you just ran into. You see a man with a green hoodie, a white smiley face mask with blonde tufts of hair poking out of the top. “Woah there… Who are you, I’ve never seen you before” he questions, his tone kind of harsh. You don’t blame him though, a complete stranger wandering into this new place uninvited, you’re honestly surprised you didn’t get an axe to the head. “Hi. Sorry, I’m Y/N. I’ve just… I’ve just left home and I saw this place. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude. I’ll leave now!” You rush out, attempting to turn around and run out of the castle, but a hand catches your wrist. “Hey wait a minute,” he commands softly, turning you back around. “It’s okay. You’re okay. I was just surprised… You said you just left home?” You give the man a shy nod, “Yeah, my people were… doing some things I didn’t approve of and so I left as soon as I was able to… I can leave now if you want” The man doesn’t let go of your wrist, “You said you just left home?” You nod in confirmation, “Well, if you want, you could live here. Well not here in the castle, but here in the SMP. I’m Dream and this is my SMP. There are a lot of people here that are actually very nice. You can build your house in the SMP and live here. But if you want to keep wandering, that’s okay too” the man called Dream offers. You think about it for a moment, “Do you think you could show me around before I make my decision?” Dream gives you a quick nod before letting go of your wrist, “Of course. Do you want to go now?” “Sure!” So Dream shows you around the SMP and introduces you to a few new people who all give you waves and friendly smiles and welcome you to the new land. All throughout the tour, Dream subtly asks you about where you're from, but you brush off his questions and for once in his life he doesn’t push it. “So what do you think? You want to stay here?” You give a quick look around and think about everyone you met, “Yeah, I would thank you!” 
And so you stay. You build your house, something with light wood that doesn’t resemble a tower at all. You also make friends with everyone else on the SMP. Somehow you reveal that you’re really good at combat with an axe and a crossbow, probably while sparring with someone, maybe Tommy because we all know he would definitely challenge a new person to duel him and then call you a coward so you would duel him and win and claim you cheated, but it makes everyone stare at you in wonder for a little bit and become just a little more afraid of you. You never tell anyone where you’re from or that you’re part pillager and that your family is made up of pillagers. You don’t think it’s important. That’s in your past and the SMP is your family now so now your family is made up of even more hybrids and more diverse people. Your past remains in your past… Until it comes knocking at your front door… 
You wake one morning to a pounding on your front door. You of course are very confused because you weren’t expecting anyone. But you get out of bed and answer the door and you find  a panicked Tommy and Tubbo standing there. “Boys, what can I-” “There are a bunch of pillagers here. They’re asking about you. They’re threatening to burn everything down if we don’t bring you.” Tubbo rambles. “We won’t let them take you and we were told to keep you here, but we just thought we should let you know.” Tommy chimes in. Your blood runs cold. Why? Why is this happening? You don’t answer the boys and you ignore their ‘keep you here bs’ before you reach over and grab your axe and crossbow and run out of the house. Tubbo and Tommy yell after you, share a look before, and run after you. You run up and find a few people, Dream, Techno, Wilbur, Philza, Sapnap, Punz, (Ya know, the best fighters… foreshadowing lol) and standing opposite of them your parents with a few other pillagers behind them. The sound of your footsteps caused all heads to snap to you. Everyone from the SMP seemed shocked to see you and stared past you and glared at the two boys. “You were supposed to keep them home” Dream hisses to the children. “They took off before we could stop them” Tubbo pants, trying to catch his breath. “Y/N go home” Techno demands, but you don’t listen. All of your attention is focused on those you used to call your family. “What are you doing?” You ask exasperated. Your father smirks at you, “Oh my dear child we’re here to bring you home of course.” And you can feel all eyes snap to you. A wave of disappointment flooded you, they all knew now. “They know” you’d think to yourself, “They know what a horrible person you are and what terrible past you come from.” You take a deep breath before speaking again, “I’m not coming home. This is my home now. Go away, leave us alone.” Laughter bubbles from the group in front of you, “Oh silly silly child. You are not home, home is back at the tower. Come now.” Your mother says, beckoning you forward. “No. I’m not going.” The smirks and smiles turn into angry stares, “No? Oh, I see how it is” your mother speaks up. “Too bad you are coming with us.” Your father barks before lunging forward for you and attempts to grab you. Before you can even react, you’re being pulled back and you’re now being protected. The two most powerful people on the server, Dream and Techno, have formed a wall in front of you with their weapons pointed at the pillagars. “Now,” Techno begins, his monotone voice two octaves deeper and threatening, “We can do this the easy way or the hard way.” Your father lunges forward once more, throwing his fist out, trying to punch Techno in the face. Techno simply caught your father’s wrist and smirked, “Alright, hard way it is” 
A full on brawl begins. 
Techno quickly takes your father while Dream takes your mother. Everyone else charges and begins fighting the rest of them. Fists are flying before arrows join the ranks in that as well. You begin fighting someone you barely recognize. Your whole energy and focus is on winning because you know if you lose it’s back to raiding and pillaging villages and you really don’t want to. You manage to down the person you’re fighting and you turn and see that all the other pillagers are either also downed or being fought by one of your friends. Your eyes catch Techno and Dream who were still fighting your father and mother respectively. You’re just about to approach when Techno gets your father in a chokehold and manages to completely debilitate him. “Call them off” Techno demands. Your father doesn’t say anything at first, his fingers desperately clawing at the arm around his throat. Techno squeezes tighter, “Did I hesitate? I said call them off” Finally your father comes to his senses, “Retreat!” He gasps out. Immediately all of the pillagers stop their fight and run back to where they were first gathered up. Techno lets go of your father and gives him a hard shove in the direction. Your father moves to stand next to your mother and all eyes fall on you again. “Leave. And never come back, or I won’t hesitate to let them kill you” your speak, your voice stone cold. You can tell your mother wants to protest, but your father catches her wrist and shakes his head no. Without another word, your father turns around and walks through the crowd and toward the direction of their tower. Confused and a little irritated all other pillagers turn too and follow your father back to where they came from. 
You and the rest stand there and watch them retreat until they are out of sight. And once again all eyes fall on you. You can’t help but look to the ground as tears form in your eyes. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know they would come for me… I understand if you want me to leave forever… Now that you know what I truly am… A monster” you spit out the words as if their poison. It is quiet for a moment and you figure that they’re all silently agreeing. You’re about to speak again when a pair of arms wrap tightly around you, and then another, and another, and another, until you’re pretty sure everyone there, even Techno, is in the group hug. The tears that had welled up in your eyes were now freely falling down your cheeks. “Y/N,” Dream begins, “We never want you to leave. Why would you think that?” A pathetic sob escapes your lips, “Because I’m part pillager because I raided and destroyed villages. I’m a monster, Dream. I don’t deserve you guys.” Everyone seems about to jump in, but through blurry eyes you see Philza give them all a look. All of the arms let you go, except for one pair that holds you even tighter, “Y/N, you’re not a monster. What you did today and what you have done in the past proves it. Today you refused to go with them, you ran away from them, you didn’t want to be a part of their lifestyle. You’re not a monster hun, you never were and you never will be” Philza comforts. His words hit your heart. You’re not a monster, no one thinks you’re a monster. More sobs escape your lips, this time they’re sobs of relief. They don’t want you to leave. You’re safe here. Philza lets you cry in his arms, he holds you for as long as you need. After a few moments you compose yourself and slowly pull out of the blonde man’s arms. “Sorry about that” you apologize, clearing your throat. “Didn’t mean to lose my cool there” Everyone around you laughs. “It’s okay Y/N. You’ve just had a big emotional thing happen, and you were pulled right of bed to experience it. It’s okay that you’re a little emotional.” Wilbur comforts, taking a step forward and resting a warm hand on your back. You completely pull away from Phil and give the tall boy a quick hug. “Hey are we doing individual hugs, because I want a hug too!” Sapnap chimes, marching forward and flinging his arms open. You can’t help but giggle and pull away from Wilbur, “We can do individual hugs if you want too” You claim, falling into his open arms. He lets out a triumphant lap and swings you around in joy. “Alright hog, let them go we want hugs too” Sapnap, still holding on to you, looks over his shoulder before picking you up and running away with you. “Hey selfish! Get back here!” And soon everyone is chasing you and Sapnap around demanding hugs. This wasn’t how you planned to tell everyone about your past, you’re not sure if you ever were going to, but you wouldn’t change it for the world.
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justoceanmyth · 2 years
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Hi!! What’s your most favorite but most hated atla character? Also what’s your idea on the most popular ships such as kataang/zutara etc and which ship would you like to see more of (if any)?
Thank you!
This is a spicy question!
Well, my most-hated favorite character is surprisingly easy to answer-- it's Wan Shi Tong. I think that he deserves so much better than he's gotten from the fandom. While there are definitely some other characters that could take this spot (Aang comes to mind), I think that the general distaste from even the casual fans of the show toward Wan Shi Tong makes him my most hated fav.
People should ask me more questions about Wan Shi Tong, I'd love to answer them. He's so much fun!
Alright, so in order to answer the next part of your question I jumped over to the ATLA ao3 fandom tag & grabbed the top three in order of popularity.
Katara/Zuko
In terms of the ship itself? Honestly it's just not my cup of tea. My favorite thing to do when it comes to shipping is to figure out how and why the characters would be drawn to each other, the themes of the relationship, how that resonates with the overall themes of the show, and what each person would be drawn to in the other. And I genuinely can't figure out how Katara would fall in love with Zuko. Like I just don't see anything in Zuko that would draw Katara to him, and without that spark I can't see anything happening. It's not even a "oh i ship it/i don't ship it" type of opinion-- those two opinions require that you can see some kind of chemistry between the two. And ultimately I'm not interested in the ship enough to try and wrap my head around it.
Which leads me into my next take-- because I find that my opinions on a ship are often colored by the fandom surrounding it. Part of the reason I'm uninterested in trying to ever wrap my head around Zuko/Katara is because it's just. So Very Big. ZK fandom is large, loud, and incredibly annoying. I find that a lot of their takes on the show are also… off-putting to say the least. I love some good fanon ships (though I do often like the canon pairing of a work as well), but the canon ship is never a threat. I've never found myself needing to construct large arguments about how one ship is bad in order to prove my ship's right to exist. That's kinda funky. I also can't stand the amount of Aang hate that comes from that area of the fandom.
Overall my take on ZK is: I'll pass. Thanks.
Sokka/Zuko
I just don't get them? I don't get the ship, I don't like the ship, it has all the problems that I had with ZK except Zuko and Sokka have literally two episodes where they interact with each other in a meaningful way, I just. Why is it popular? I don't get it.
Also the shippers are very annoying imo.
Overall my take on ZS is: I don't get it and I don't want to.
Aang/Katara
I love Aang/Katara It just happens to hit on all the things I like about ships-- there's so much depth to it in regards to why the characters might be drawn to each other, the themes of the relationship are rich and interesting to think about, they resonate strongly with the message of the show, and I can find numerous reasons that either character would be drawn to the other one. Overall there's so much to think about and work with in regards to their relationship and dynamic that I couldn't really sum up all my thoughts in this post.
I think when it comes to KA my biggest frustration is that fan content/fanon can feel stagnant sometimes-- where everything starts to feel like it coexists with canon peacefully, or fills in missing scenes, or has some duty to end in a way that allows for canon to pick up the story from the end. But there's so many interesting possible canon alterations and AUs that would lend interesting complications to the Aang/Katara dynamic, but I feel that people aren't always willing to let canon go for long enough to explore the alternatives. I'd love to see more non LoK/Comics compliant fan content that pairs Kataang together. I feel like there's often this thought that "we're fans of the canon ship, we need to keep as close to canon('s idea of their future) as possible" when it would be so much more interesting to-- idk, try and avoid using LoK or the comics at all!
It would be fun!
Overall take: I love the ship, the amount of potential in the ship, and the complexities that can exist in the dynamic!
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inessencedevided · 4 years
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The Untamed, episode 43 - watching notes
The sun is setting on this show for me and I'm not ready to say goodbye yet 😔
(As if I will! Ha. Imma blog about nothing else the next ... probably years)
Last time on Sophie watches the untamed: We're still in the restricted section. The twin love-struck idiots of lan and wwx found the Collection of turmoil and suspect Jin Guangyao of intentionally bringing about Nie Mingjue's qui deviation.
As much as I love the "hihi. Wwx is wearing his boyfriend's underrobe" aspect of this, I also like the visual incorporation of lwj's colour scheme into wwx's clothes. (Not just through the undertone, his black tone also has slight grey seam.) It's as if now that they are finally fully committed to each other, wwx is displaying it for all the world to see
Jin Guangyao tore out a page to hide the evidence. That's not how to do that!!!
My heart is breaking for Lan Xichen. He looks like a man standing on a train track and watching the light speed towards him in horror while he's unable to move away
Feels like exactly no one on this show is getting their happy ending
*thinks about yi city and cries forever*😭😭😭
"Wangji, Jin Guangyao,in my eyes, is a totally different person from how you and other people see him." And we all know that lwj knows exactly what that's like
PARALLELS! 😭
(Sorry, I have a thing for those)
And lwj looks so pained
Thinking about it, it's now the man lwj loves against the man lxc loves (in whatever way. I still ship them. Not sure if its "canonically" romantic though). They can't both be right, so ... one of them is going to get their heart broken
Great, first the Yunmeng brothers, now the lan brothers are breaking my heart 🥺
Lwj says he's visiting "Grand Master", that's Lan Qiren right? What happened to him anyway? Haven't seen him in ages
I love how, even though it is wwx's word against jgy's right now, lan Xichen is still genuinely kind towards wwx
The whipping scars! I hadn't even thought about those anymore 😳
I'm probably going to get my heart ripped out soon, but before that
"You are not qualified to talk to me."
Sickest. Burn. Ever.
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Also, no disrespect to the actor, but that's a backpfeifengesicht if I've ever seen one
(Backpfeifengesicht: "German compound word for a 'face that should be slapped'. Ex:. When GWB smirks on TV, my German friend Uwe tells me that he sees a 'Backpfeifengesicht'." Urban dictionary)
He went to burial mount after wwx was killed??? 🥺🥺🥺
I've noticed something with lwj. When he's distressed, he won't look people in the eye or not even at their faces, just in their very general direction. To me it seems like he almost... can't? Any thoughts on that? Cause I'm intrigued but I can't think about it too much right now cause I'm already writing half an essay in this commentary again 😅
Oh fuck YOU Jiggy!!!
Holy shit ... holy shit
Lan Wangji 🥺🥺🥺
He fought against everyone?
This is how he showed his grieve???
He went to the place wei Wuxian had called home and ... what? Protected or ot so they wouldn't desecrate it? To search for him? To ... what?
Oh god, Wangji! 😭
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That image... I'm speechless. It's so powerful
He's half-mad with grieve and kneeling in the ruins of his dead loves home, having fought himself to exhaustion and I'm... not okay 😭😭😭
He had to repent for THREE YEARS??
Oh no, you don't
Holy ...
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Holy shit
How can my heart break and be so full at the same time 💔🥺
Lan Wangji ... my love
I'm ... so proud of him and yet so sad
Here he is at his lowest, finally standing up to the orthodoxy he knows to be wrong
This is inhumane 😳
The corporal punishment of the lan sect always was but THIS
Fuck them
Or Lan Qiren specifically
That's his nephew. How can he even look at himself?
"Eradicate evil. Establish laws. Than goodness will be everlasting."
IT'S NOT THAT FUCKING EASY!!!
WHAT EVEN IS "GOODNESS"? WHOSE VERSION OF GOODNESS? DEVINE EVIL! HOW FAR REACHING INTO THE PRIVATE SVERE SHOULD THUSE LAWS BE? DOES IT STOP AT "DON'T STEAL FROM PEOPLE OR AT "DON'T PICK YOUR NOSE AT DINNER"?
what I'm saying is: there are about 200 ethical question ls being raised by this rule alone!
And now lan Wangji had 3 tears to contemplate them
Wwx asking "why would he bother ...?" BECAUSE YOU ARE LOVED YOU GODDAMN IDIOT!!
Ohhh! We're getting their parents' story 😱
Oh this IS a Lan episode 💙
So another Lan falling quickly and never looking back?
I'm sensing a pattern here 🤨
Wait what?
Let me get this straight:
Their father loved a woman who DID NOT love him back and then killed one of his teachers
(And I hope we find out why. That sounds like there is a REALLY interesting story there)
Then he takes her to cloud recess and DESPIT HER NOT LOVING HIM, marries her, fathers two children with her (um... how voluntary was that????) locks her up (as punishment for the murder?) then locks HIMSELF up and then fucks of and leaves his children with their uncle
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What kind of disaster human being was their dad????
Did he do the right thing WHEN HE MARRIED AND PROBABLY RAPED A WOMAN WHO DIDN'T LOVE HIM???
NO!!!
The fuck kinda question is that ??
If you have to marry her against her will and then lock her up, guess what? That's not love, that's wanting to possess someone
I hope that maybe the connotation is different in the og Chinese,but I'm not holding out much hope
That explains why Qiren is such a lovely character through 😒
But god, my heart breaks for lwj and lxc :'(
Little Lan Wangji!!! 🥺🥺🥺
Oh darling ...
Oh no ...
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Look at him look at his crooked little headband😭😭😭
He went there every month!!!
Oh Wangji 💔💔
Stubborn, steadfast, loving Wangji!
That seals it. I KNEW why he was my favourite character
He isn't so passive all the time, because he feels too little! He feels entirely too much!!! 😭😭😭
And that explains why lwj was so worried about wwx's demonic cultivation harming him!!! 😭
Oh god, it was such an old hurt for him. I had no idea 🥺🥺🥺
All of these characters need a therapist
Lxc playing the flute to what ... deal with his emotions? Express his grieve? Remeber their mother? (And god, do I want to know more about her!!) Either way, It's making me tear up 😥
"It's so difficult to determine others personalities depending on our perspective." Welcome to the human condition, my friend 💙
And that's love
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I ... wish I could show you my face right now
I'm smiling through tears right now
It's so utterly beautiful
He looks so vulnerable here! With his hair (almost) down
And given what we've just learned, that's remarkable!!!
He closed himself off became the immovable stone-faced second Jade of Lan and yet, somehow, wwx wormed his way into his heart and sure, both of them needed to overcome a lot, but here they are, vulnerable and open,not letting their parent's fate decide theirs
I'm... *sniff*
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I can never get enough of lwj with his hair like this!!
It's so domestic, so soft
And look at his face! 😭
And mister "alcohol is prohibited" is now serving it 😭
Oh my god this scene is so beautiful
I'm speechless
Was the second flute Jin Guangyao as well?
At this point I'm just expecting more plot-twists
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He looks so young! 🥺
Both of them are exhibiting so much growth in this episode!! Wwx realising that the fact that the cultivation world had always looked for a scapegoat and that he himself was just the most convenient target, that it's not to any personal failing of his, that's HUGE!
And I'm so proud of him :')
Lwj starting to play in the distance :')
This is so utterly peaceful
My heart is bursting 😭😭😭
The music, the scenery ...
Also, both thinking they have a clean conscious!!! 😭😭😭
Again, it's them holding the same morals that's important! I cannot tell you how happy that makes me!
(But wwx still cannot drink like a normal person :D)
The contrast to lxc sitting alone couldn't be starker 😔
Wait, why are there puppets at burial mounds again?
Are we going back to burial mounds? I'm weirdly excited 😅
Aaand Jin Guangyao just proved to them that he's lying. Poor Xichen
Yup, I'm pretty sure his heart just snapped in half
Little Apple!!! I've missed him 😁
Gosh, they're laying it on thick with the domestic husband bliss this episode and I'm here for it.
I love lwj's soft smile when he looks at bunnies so much!! 🥰
Bunnies, bunnies everywhere
It's the invasion of the bunnies
Who ever is the show runner *banging pots and pans together* IT'S GAY!! cab you all hear me? These two love each other! It's G - A - Y!!! Gay!!!
Probably
Lwj's shocked look when wwx says that he's not popular with little animals, as if to say "how dare they!" :D
Holy shit ... HOW MANY SCENES CAN THEY INCLUDE IN THIS EPISODE THAT MAKE THEM LOOK SO GODDAMN MARRIED???
Is wwx sitting side saddle?
Wwx plays wangxian :')
He finally remembers how lwj recognized him :')
Sneaky, show, very sneaky :D
Wwx about to casually steal some melons, lwj *wordlessly takes out money* ^^
MIANMIAN!!!! AAAAAAHHHHHH!
I'd given up hope that we'd see her again!!!
I'm so happy I could burst!!!
Lwj's little exasperated head-shake before he stands up from crouching behind some hay 😂
Aww, look at her family! 😍😍😍
She build her own live :')
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And look at this badass woman protecting the ones she loves!!!
ARE YOU KIDDING ME WEI WUXIAN??? You don't remember her???
You better remember my wife!!!
Aaand another freeze frame. But I'm willing to forgive it because THIS EPISODE WAS SO GODDAMN BRILLIANT!
It made me realise why I was so drawn to lan Wangji as a character. Of course he is mu favourite character! He ticks every single box
Let me explain. My favourite characters almost always share the following characteristics: seems either cold and distant or ethereal and aloof, as if they are above such puny human things like feelings™️(bonus if they're actually not human and their argument is "I'm [insert species]. We can't feel [insert emotion they are definetly feeling very strongly]"). then, over the course of the story, we (along with they themselves because they were in denial) discover that it's not that they feel too little, they feel entirely too much. They're a sea of emotions so deep that the surface is calm, but don't you dare be near them when the storm is coming because all hell will break loose. (extra bonus point if that storm involves them rebelling against the oppressive society they were born into and adhered to until then because they realise their consciousness won't allow it any longer.) afterwards they realise that making themselves vulnerable once in a while is actually a good thing and they proceed to fuck the Rebel™️ who they've secretly been in love with the entire time, a feeling they only now allow themselves to act on
The last part sadly isn't always canon, but who has ever had time for that?
You know what this episode made me realise most of all? The Lan sect are just as human as the rest of them. In fact, they seem to be especially prone to acting rashly on strong emotions. (I don't remember the exact story, but didn't the founder of the Lan sect also have some kind of tragic love story?) It should be obvious, but the impression you get is that they are so detached from their wants, so rigorous and disciplined in their righteousness, that they are almost super-human. But no. Thise 3000 and some rules? They weren't born out of some enlightened mind that had the secret of live figures out, they're a crutch. Abiding by them without question rids one of responsibility to make even the tiniest moral choice for oneself. But that won't work because a) they're bounty to contradict each other at some point and b) that's not how human beings work. They're messy and unpredictable and beautifully complicated. The way Lan Qiren choses to apply them, he completely disregards that. At that point, the rules aren't there anymore to grant a harmonious society, but simply for their own sake. (Or maybe as a wall to hide behind)
@sweetlittlevampire @fandom-glazed @elenirlachlagos @allhailthedramallama @luckymoony @kyrrahbird @i-love-him-on-purpose
I think this liveblog has been the longest so far. I'm sorry for going on so many tangents, but lwj's backstory hit me really hard. I hope you guys weren't too bored 💚
(I also apologise for the mountains of typos that probably accumulated in this post. I'm too tired to check.)
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The Trials of Emi
Pairing: A little Minho. A sprinkle of Frypan. Gally x Emi(OC)
Summary: Emi, her twin brother Thomas, and a small group of gladers had been rescued and taken to a safe haven. Or so it seemed. It doesn't take long for Thomas to realize something is wrong. What happens next is a true trial for all of them but Emi's trials began the moment she was ripped away from a dying Gally. Watching someone you love die right before your eyes truly takes a toll.
Finally meeting the right arm could have been the end but betrayal leads to even more chaos and loss. A new mission to rescue those taken from them leads them to a city. The last city. After Emi finally comes to terms with everything that's happened something unfolds that changes everything again. She will have to not only deal with helping her brother take down WCKD and save their friend but also deal with all the new problems in her head and her heart.
Rating: As of right now it’s at most PG13. Some strong language that’s about it but it could change.
(This is the 2nd part/book to my other story "The Maze trials: A Gally Fanfiction". This will cover the events of the scorch trails and the death cure.)
Chapter Twelve
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Six months. It took six long months for us to finally reach the place Vince had told us about. We immediately made the place our base. Vince and some others made the decision to see if they could get one of the old docked ships fixed up enough to use. We needed a way to the safe haven after all. If we had a ship we could get far away from WCKD but we had other things to get done first.
I was currently sitting next to Fry watching Jorge and Brenda argue over what was needed to fix one of the jeeps. Over the past six months, I had spent most of my free time with Fry. He’d been there for me on all my bad days and nights. He comforted me and made me laugh. I could feel the two of us growing closer but I was careful to keep the line drawn. As much as I adored Fry I couldn’t give him more than my friendship. Not yet anyway. He knew that and was incredibly good-hearted about it. He had his arm over the back of my chair as I leaned against him.
"We got it!" Thomas and Newt both shouted as they ran out of one of the old buildings.
I jumped at their sudden outburst. The two boys sat down in front of us looking excited and out of breath.
"We found them!" Thomas said excitedly.
The four of us shared a surprised look as we starred at Thomas. We'd completely lost WCKD for months. The trail was completely cold and now they suddenly knew where to find them?
"What did you find?" Jorge asked.
"We got a transmission. There's a train coming threw about an hour or two from here. It's hauling a bunch of the immunes to a new location." Newt said quickly.
"How do we find this train?" I asked them.
"We passed the track on our way here." Thomas smiled.
"So what's the plan?" Brenda asked.
"We'll need a few more hands. I'm thinking Harriet and Vince. Maybe a few more." Thomas said.
"I'll get Harriet," I told him.
He nodded.
"I'll get Vince. Fry and Newt see if you can get us a few more hands." Thomas ordered.
We each nodded then hopped up to do as he said. I found Harriet in one of the buildings going threw supplies.
"Hey H," I said to get her attention.
She looked up at me and smiled.
"Emi, what can I do for you?" She asked setting down the supplies in her hand.
"We found them," I told her simply.
Her smile grew even wider as she laughed.
"Where?" She asked quickly.
"On a train that's gonna pass close by," I informed her.
"What do you need?" She asked walking around the table she was standing at.
"Thomas has a plan but he said he needed a few extra hands. Thought we'd see if you were interested." I explained.
"Hell yea! Let's do it!" She cheered.
Harriet followed me out of the building then back up to where Jorge and Brenda were working on some of the trucks. Fry and Newt were there with about four others. Thomas hadn't made it back with Vince yet.
"Who are they?" I asked pointing at the newcomers.
"I'm Alex," one boy said with a charming smile as he extended his hand to me.
"I'm Emi," I told him as I shook his hand.
"You're Thomas' sister right?" He asked.
I nodded.
"It's amazing none of us realized it immediately. You two look like the same bloody person." Newt chuckled.
“That’s Ashley, Drake, and Eric,” Fry said pointing to the other three.
"Good you're all here," Thomas said from behind me.
I turned to see him and Vince with two other boys. They joined the group.
"Here's the plan. Jorge and Brenda will take one jeep. Vince and I will take another. Brenda and Jorge will be our distraction as Vince and I get on the train. Newt, you and Emi will be close by with torches to get the compartment loose. These two, Daniel and Greg, will be with Newt and Emi for added protection. Harriet, Fry, and the rest of you will be our hidden backup to jack the aircraft they will most likely send in for help. Brenda, you and Jorge will need to lead that aircraft to them. Once you take it you need to come back to the train to get the compartment and us." Thomas explained.
"When is this going down?" I asked him.
"In two days around midday. We will discuss more details once we have all the equipment we need." Thomas said.
We all nodded then went our separate ways to gather what was needed. Over the next day, we went over every small detail of the plan. It seemed we had every possible outcome thought up and dealt with. When the day finally arrived Brenda and Jorge took Fry, Alex, Ashley, Drake, Eric, and Harriet to where they needed to be while Thomas and Vince dropped me, Newt, Daniel, and Greg off to hide close to the tracks.
"Be careful out there," I told both Vince and Thomas as they climbed back in their jeep.
As they drove off Newt and I took cover behind a larger boulder. Daniel and Greg each hid behind their own boulder. Thomas would signal us when he needed us.
"How are things going with you two?" I asked Newt as we sat in the dirt.
He chuckled.
"Pretty great actually." He smiled.
"I'm glad things worked out for you two," I told him happily.
"Thanks Em" he chuckled.
"Are things getting better for you?" He asked.
I thought about it for a second. Things did seem better. I was sleeping threw the night and didn't feel like the weight of the world was on my shoulders. I felt like I'd finally made my peace.
"Yea, I'm good. It's been rough dealing with losing him but I've finally come to grips with it. I have enough memories of him to keep me going." I smiled at him.
"Maybe one of these days you can completely move on and give all that love you have to someone else. Maybe Fry.” Newt said softly.
I chuckled at that.
"I doubt it. I may have come to terms with Gally's death but I don't think any other guy, even Fry, will ever be able to make me feel like he did. If I happened to meet a guy who did then maybe but I don't think that will happen." I shrugged.
“What is going on with you and Fry then?” Newt asked.
“We are friends,” I said simply.
“Looks like a bit more than friends to me and Tommy.” Next chuckled softly.
“No, just friends. He’s been there for me while everyone else has been so busy. He did confess to me that he’d like to be more than a friend to me one day but he knows that’s a while down the road.” I explained.
“So he is your friend for now until you’re ready to completely move on?” Next asked with a smirk.
“Yea, sure” I chuckled softly.
A train whistled in the distance instantly gaining mine and Newt's attention. We righted ourselves to wait for the action to begin. We could hear the train getting closer and closer. It was traveling pretty fast from the sound of it. I barely peeked around the boulder to see the engine not far from us.
"Brenda and Jorge should already be close to it," I said aloud.
It didn't take long for the engine to reach us. I couldn't see the end of the train but I knew that was where Thomas and Vince were.
"They're on top," Newt said.
I could see two shadows running across the top of the train.
"They have company," Newt said worriedly.
On the opposite side of the train, coming from the engine, was four or five people running towards Thomas and Vince.
"What do we do?" I asked him trying not to panic.
"Nothing, we wait for Tommy's signal," Newt said slowly.
I watched as Thomas and Vince's figures dropped between the compartments. I could hear shots being fired in the distance then a loud explosion. The back half of the train came to a screeching halt. We stayed hidden until Thomas called for us.
A loud whistle rang out. Newt popped up to check it out.
"Newt!" Vince shouted.
"Let's go! Move!" Newt said gesturing for me and the other two boys to follow him.
We ran over to the train as fast as we could. I could hear Thomas on the other side shouting for Minho. The kids inside the compartment we're shouting back. Newt went to the side Thomas was on while I dropped down on the other side.
I pulled my goggles on over my eyes as I pulled out my torch. I got to work as quickly as I could to cut through the thick metal. Thomas and Vince climbed on top of the compartment to start hooking the ropes together. Daniel and Greg were standing on the ground trying to hold off the WCKD guards.
"Newt, how you doing?" Thomas asked loudly.
"Don't rush me!" I heard Newt shout.
"Emi" Thomas said coming to my side of the train.
"Working on it!" I shouted up to him.
Shots rang out in our directions making me jump. I kept my eyes on the torch but I could hear the bullets hitting the metal all around me.
"Newt! Emi! Get up here!" Thomas shouted.
Daniel and Greg were already climbing on top of the compartment.
"Almost done!" Newt shouted back at him.
"Newt! Go!" I heard Vince shout from the other side of the train.
"Emi get your ass up here now!" Thomas shouted down at me.
I finished cutting threw the metal then shoved the torch back in my bag. I slung my bag over my shoulder as I started to climb up the ladder. The boys were lying down and I was quick to join them as a bullet zipped right past me.
"Where the hell are they?" Newt questioned loudly.
"I don't know!" Thomas shouted back as he tried to shoot down some of our attackers.
The sound of a large aircraft had me and Newt rolling onto our backs as Thomas, Daniel, and Greg kept shooting. The aircraft hovered right above us then the bay door opened. I could see Brenda and Fry smiling down at us as they released the large hook. Thomas, Newt, and I jumped to our feet to grab it.
"Come on!" Thomas shouted as he tried to jump for the hook.
"Lower!" Newt shouted.
Thomas grabbed the hook. He and Newt tried to pull it down faster. When we could we quickly hooked all the ropes onto it.
"Go! Go!" Thomas shouted up to our friends inside the craft.
Slowly the ropes started to lift.
"Vince! Get up here!" Newt shouted.
The compartment started to lift off its frame.
"Now Vince!" Thomas shouted.
Vince jumped grabbing the bottom of the ladder. He climbed up quickly as we rose higher into the air.
"Yea!" Thomas shouted excitedly.
We did it. We actually did it. We just stole a whole damn train compartment full of immunes from WCKD. Damn this felt good.
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1dfangirls35 · 4 years
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Voir Dire (N.H.) A fake dating OU about contracts, soulmates and risking it all for love.
Masterlist // Tell Me What You Think!
twenty-eight
As the elevator ticked past each floor of the Capitol Records building, Niall began to wonder if this would be the last time he would ever step foot in this or any place related to music.
He still remembered the first time he stepped foot in the iconic building- fresh off the One Direction hiatus and unsure what he would be as an artist. His dreams for his solo career just within reach. He was a different person back then. A person that was willing to do whatever it took to make it in the music world and to make a name for himself. A person who believed that Capitol Records was the key to paving a career that fit his dreams perfectly. A person who still believed that the music industry wasn't all bad.
But today was the end of that. He would no longer give up his own relationships, hopes and dreams just because of an image that his label wanted him to portray. He would no longer be letting someone else dictate his life; what he sang, what he wore, who he loved. No today, for perhaps the first time in his career, Niall was going to take charge of his own destiny.
A part of Niall was still scared that something could go wrong. He'd asked Kelsey ten times last night whether she was sure she wanted to go through with this, knowing what might happen if their plan didn't quite go off without a hitch.
Each time he'd asked her, she'd nodded and smiled and told him there's nothing she'd ever been more sure about. Niall knew saying those words was hard for her. He also knew that the smile on her face was constructed with just as much fear as Niall had right now.  But he couldn't be happier to finally be at the place where he and Kelsey could have the life together he'd always dreamed of. Free of contracts and fake girlfriends and manipulation.
Niall didn't wait for Alan Michaels's secretary to greet him when he stepped off the elevator, or for her to notify Mr. Michaels that he had a visitor. Instead he headed full speed towards the double-glass doors of the Capitol executive's office and pushed them open, saying in his strongest, gutsiest voice "We need to talk."
Alan Michaels turned from his computer, snapping his head around to look at Niall with surprise. "Mr. Horan did we have a meeting today?"
"We do now." Niall said forcefully, taking a seat in the chair in front of the desk. He tried to ignore the light shake of his hands as he folded them in his lap, instead taking delight in the fact that Alan Michaels had no idea what was coming for him.
"And what can I do for you today Mr. Horan?" Mr. Michaels asked in a long drawn-out voice, shuffling a stack of papers around on his desktop.  
"Whatever you did to make Kelsey Benton break up with me- I want it nullified," Niall doesn't flinch as he says the words, staring straight into Mr. Michaels dark brown eyes as if they aren't the most intimidating pair he's ever seen.
Niall swears it takes five minutes before words leave Mr. Michaels mouth again, his heartbeat rapid in his ear.
"Excuse me?" Mr. Michaels said his face astonished. "I'm sorry Mr. Horan, I have no idea what you are talking about. Have you been in contact with Miss Benton?"
"Not at all." Niall said, his lips staying in a straight line. "And I've begun to realize that perhaps there is a reason why." Niall wondered if this small fib would be enough to convince Alan Michaels that Kelsey hadn't breeched the conditions of her contract, but even if Michaels suspected he did, there was no proof.
"I can assure you Mr. Horan, what Miss Benton chooses to do in her relationship is entirely under her control. Perhaps she simply decided you weren't the one for her," the lies slipped out of Mr. Michaels mouth with ease, and Niall can see why he has this job. He's good at it. The lying, the manipulating, the convincing. Niall wondered how many other artists have sat in this very spot and been convinced that the label was doing everything in their best interest. How many hearts had been broken, families changed, careers altered all under the power of Alan Michaels and his smug smile. That wouldn't be the case today.
Niall had not expected this to be a simple meeting. He knew Alan Michaels wouldn't admit to meddling in his relationship willingly, so Niall had come prepared with his own pretty little piece of blackmail.
"Let me make myself clear- ALAN," Niall's voice was strong. "I happen to know several journalists who are just a phone call away from releasing an interview with me about my fake relationship with Krystal. I'm sure it would be the talk of LA in a matter of minutes."
Niall watched as Mr. Michaels throat bobbed in a firm swallow, he had his attention now.
"You are under a contract Mr. Horan. These promotional tactics are not to be disclosed to the public."
"And if I chose to tell my fans the truth? That you've hired someone to be my girlfriend over the past year. That the dates, the music video, the "love" was entirely something of your own creation in order to help increase your record sales. That I was forced into this against my will? What would you do then?"
"Well we would have to terminate your contract with Capitol Records. You would no longer be one of our recording artists." The look on Alan Michaels face told Niall that he thought he had given the ultimate threat, but little did Alan Michaels know, that threat was exactly what Niall wanted him to say.
"I bet you'd hate to see that happen wouldn't you? I mean a number one album in 42 countries, a sold-out world tour, some of the most dedicated fans in the universe. There's a lot more where that came from," Niall was taunting him now, and the more Mr. Michaels smug grin transformed into a frown, the more fun Niall was having. He was getting to Alan Michaels, he could tell.
"We would hate to see one of Capitol's best artists leave the label, that's for certain," Mr. Michaels said, his voice now laced with nervousness instead of intimidation.
"So you see the dilemma here? Looks like you are going to have to choose between terminating whatever kind of threat you made with Miss Benton to ensure she didn't ruin your promotional plans or terminating your relationship with one of your most successful artists. I mean if it was me, Alan, I don't think I'd think twice about it. What's the girl to you?" Niall crossed his legs in the chair, staring Mr. Michaels with a soft grin on his face.
Mr. Michaels kept his hand folded. He didn't say anything, Niall thought he was considering it. He didn't even think he'd get this far. He assumed that Alan Michaels would be invincible to manipulation. But today was proof that if you play the right cards, the right threat can convince anyone to change their stance.
Alan Michaels took a deep breath. "Kelsey Benton's contract will be nullified."
"Now," Niall added firmly. He couldn't risk this not going through. Not with what he was about to do next. "You'll let her know now."
Mr. Michaels nodded, picking up his phone. "Samantha, can you get Kelsey Benton on the line for me please?" He hung up, looking Niall in the eyes. The two stare at each other, neither speaking. Until the phone rings again. Niall can only assume its Kelsey on the other line.
"Is this Miss Benton?" Mr. Michaels asked. Niall can't hear Kelsey on the other line, but he pictures her sitting on Niall's couch, still in her pajamas, smiling at the sound of Alan Michaels voice. The thought made a small smile break through Niall's otherwise serious expression.
"This is Alan Michaels with Capitol Records. We've decided to terminate the contract we've signed with you. All I need is your official signature and it's gone forever."
Mr. Michaels hung up the phone, turning to look at Niall expectantly, as if to say 'Happy now'.
"So that's official?" Niall asked, cautious to make any more moves before the pieces were set in place.
"Official as of my signature right now. Miss Benton's signature is mainly a formality. It's as if our agreement never existed."
"Good." Niall nodded, inhaling deeply before saying his next words. "Well now that that's taken care of. I'd like to notify you that I'm officially terminating my contract with Capitol Records."
"But..." Mr. Michaels protested.
"My lawyers have assured me that there is nothing in our current agreement limiting me from telling anyone about what went on here once our contract has been terminated. I'd get your PR team ready, Alan. My fans don't take too lightly to people messing with my life." He stood up, pulling down his charcoal suit jacket and reaching out a hand to shake. "Best of luck with everything."
"But Mr. Horan..." Mr. Michaels seemed to be at a loss for words. "We can work something out, we can come up with a new agreement. I promise you we will not hire anyone for your PR again..." Alan Michaels was stumbling through his words now, but Niall just smiled and made his way towards the office doors.
He walked past Mr. Michaels secretary, who has now stood up, looking towards the office and the still rambling Alan Michaels standing in his office doorway.
"You're going to regret this Mr. Horan!" Mr. Michaels yelled at him as Niall called the elevator.
As the elevator doors dinged open, Niall turned around, facing Alan Michaels one more time. "No Alan, I don't think I will." And with that he stepped inside the elevator, letting the doors close, literally and figuratively, on his time as a Capitol Records recording artist.
Tag List: @awomanindeniall @ihearthemcallingforyou​ , @niall-is-my-dream ,​  @stylishmuser​​​ , @thicksniall
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shawnpetermuffins · 5 years
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I Miss You
A/n: I hope this is good because I put this off for so long wanting to do it justice. And this is based very loosely off I Miss you.
Summary: you two broke up recently, and it's not sitting well with Shawn, even though he's the reason you broke up.
Requested by @it-isnt-in-myy-blood: Hi, I recently listened to the song 'I Miss you' (Clean Bandit, Julia Michaels). Maybe you could write a fic based on the song, angsty but with a fluff ending? Thank you... ❤️
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Kinda_yourname
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2,158 likes
Kinda_yourname Cabo sunsets >>>> anything else
It may have only been a week, but I'm missing it here! 😭
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I shut my phone off and toss it to the end of the bed. I should have been with her on that trip, but tour got in the way. I got in the way. It's crazy to think that if you asked me three weeks ago, I would have said that my girlfriend and I could overcome any obstacle thrown at us. But ask me again a week later, and I would tell you I was wrong. That being away from her for months at a time was too much for me and I broke it off because I thought it would be what was best for both of us in the end.
Now ask me if I still believe that.
I don't.
I haven't told anyone about us yet. I mean, everyone probably suspects because there haven't been Amy preshow FaceTime calls for good luck, and I'm not texting like a madman during dinner or when we're on our way to the venues. And I know she hasn't said anything to anyone either. How? Because for one, she hasn't blocked me on any social media - I know, I've checked at least ten times just within the last two hours. And two, she hasn't deleted the three pictures of us that she has on her Instagram. They're still there for everyone to see, me included.
Now my fingers are hovering over the keyboard and I'm staring at her name on my phone which is still My Love 😍, and I'll probably never change it. Because she is my love, and to strip her of that title because I'm an idiot just isn't fair.
Hey... I miss you
I type and backspace and type and backspace at least ten times. Because I want to text her. I want so badly to text her, but what if she doesn't want to hear from me? I wouldn't blame her if she didn't want to. I was the worst. Breaking up with her over the phone, no less because I was hurting being away from her. Never once did it occur to me that, yeah, she was hurting too. Or maybe she's with someone else. Maybe she's found somebody new. I want her happy, sure. But I selfishly still want to be the one that makes her happy.
Y/n I miss you.
I delete it one last time and open my photo gallery. I have an album saved for photos of us. Photos that I never got to post because she wanted to keep us as private as possible without being a secret. Which is why both of us only have 3 photos of each other on our Instagram. One for our six months, a year, and a year and a half. Two more months and we would have had a fourth picture.
I'm swiping through the photos landing on one I took of her when we were flying back to Canada after our first trip together. We're on a private jet because this was before we went public with our relationship. Andrew made sure that we weren't seen together in the airport or anything. She's sitting in the seat across the aisle from me, legs up to her chest, earphones in, head resting on her knees as she smiles brightly at me. There's another one of us curled up together on this tiny chair in a green room in the UK that Andrew sent me. She's literally curled into a ball on my lap, sleeping peacefully and my legs are spread in front of me, arms wrapped tightly around her body, head resting against the back of the seat.
The next one Brian took. We were at my place for a very impromptu new years party. It was just gonna be me and y/n, but she insisted we invite the guys over. And we did. It was one of the best nights of my life. We're watching the ball drop, with her in my lap, arm around my shoulder. I have one arm behind her back, the other on her thigh. I think Brian knew something was going to happen because at ten seconds to midnight he pulled his phone out and captured out first new years kiss. She's holding my face and I'm practically leaning her back against the couch. It looks like I'm seconds away from crawling on top of her, and it be honest, I probably was. She's just too perfect for me to resist.
Then there's one that Josiah took of us just a few months ago at the studio house. I had y/n on the kitchen counter, she was in these jean shorts that I loved her in and a button up that she'd stolen from my suitcase. Not that I was complaining. It looked far better on her than it did on me. I stood between her legs, my hands on her sides, slipping under the shirt a little bit, leaning her hips exposed. Not that either of u cared with her fingers threaded in my hair as casually as they were. My face is blocked by her figure, but there isn't a doubt in my mind that I was smiling entirely too wide standing between her legs.
The video that follows knocks the breath out of me. She giggling like crazy, but the camera isn't on her, it's on me. On my back, more specifically. She laughs even more when I wince at the feel of her fingers on my red, raw skin that is now home of her fingernail scratches.
"Baby? What happened to your back?" She asked, amused.
"Don't know," I said, turning to face her, my cheeks still holding a slight blush. "But I think the real question is, what happened to your neck, missy?" I pluck the phone from her hands and turn the camera to her where she's trying to cover her face. I manage, however, to take her hands in my free one and the camera focuses on the flourishing bruises that litter her beautiful neck, my favorite place to rest my head.
I close my eyes, the memory of that night filling my mind. Watching her come down from her high, my face still buried between her legs. The weight and cold touch of her hands as she pulled me up to her, into her, because she needed me closer. I can hear myself murmuring the words 'I love you' all over her skin, still remember the way her back arched when I hit the right spot again and again and her finger ran down my back over and over, once more and she probably would have drawn blood. And I may not be home, but I can smell her on the sheets, that constant aroma of warm vanilla penetrating my nostrils. God, do I miss her.
I'm only making it worse for myself by doing this, I know that. But I should feel bad. I lost the greatest thing in my life and I didn't need to. So I got back to our messages, but instead of going to type a new one, I scroll through, reading through our old texts. There's countless paragraphs of us professing our love for each other. Lots of random pictures sent, most from my side. There's conversations about getting a home together, and a dog. And her telling me how much she loves my family and me telling her how much they love her, how much they ask about her. It's all hitting me too hard right now.
And it doesn't help that im literally sobbing at 2 in the morning, in Paris. The city of love. The place she told me was her favorite trip to ever take with me. Where we stood atop the eiffle tower and I gave her a promise ring, a ring that said I would love her and keep her forever. A promise ring that was now probably in the ocean in Cabo because I tore us apart so easily.
I sit up suddenly, struggling to catch my breath. It takes a few minutes, but I'm able to pull myself out of this empty bed that would only be comfortable with y/n laying next to me. I'm scrambling through the room, picking up the pair of jeans I threw off my body earlier and slipping back into them. I find a torn work out shirt in the bottom of my back and push my head and arms through before throwing my youth hoodie over my already overheated upper body. My passport is sitting in my guitar case, and I grab both things without a second thought. My suitcase trailing behind me.
It's difficult booking a flight and carrying a suitcase and guitar all at once, but I get along just well enough and adjust myself in the lobby while I wait for a taxi. I don't text Andrew until I've made it to the airport and am in my seat on the plane, ready for take off.
Emergency... had to fly home. Promise to make it back in time for the Paris show.
And I turn my phone off before he can text or call me back. Because there isn't a damn thing that he could say that would keep me there in a city that's meant for lovers, when my lover is across the world instead of laying in my arms the way she should be.
I know I shouldn't be doing this. I know there is someone out there who is better for her. Someone who isn't constantly on the move. Someone who can come home to her every night and help her make dinner. Someone who can cuddle her until she falls asleep when she's having a particularly bad day. I know there's someone who can do those things.
But I also know that he won't love her the way I do. He won't know all the little things that I do. Like how she only uses a blue toothbrush. Always has. And he won't notice the tiny scar that she has on her right middle finger from when we tried to make dinner together one night and she cut herself. He probably won't know that she wakes up at 3:34 every single night, because she hasn't been able to sleep fully and soundly through the night since she was four years old. And he'll mess up the way she likes her tea, using tea bags instead of leaves. (She like the herbal taste that you get when you use the leaves. And she likes when you do two scoops of them, and two scoops of sugar, but just cane sugar, the rock sugar makes it too earthy. And of course, she drinks it on ice because she hates burning her tongue with hot drinks.)
I'm thinking way too much as I get off the plane, reluctantly turning my phone back on only to see texts from just about everyone I know. They're all asking where I am, but I ignore them, because what I'm about to do is far more important than anything they threaten me with. I have to make things right.
Standing in front of this door that I've stood in front of hundreds of times should make me feel at ease. Remembering all the times I had her pressed against the other side of the door because I just couldn't wait to have her all to myself. But if anything, it's making me more nervous. So nervous that my hands are shaking, palms sweating, my breathing is jagged and I know if I don't knock right now I might never get the chance again and I can't lose her for real this time. So without giving myself the chance to rethink, I knock on the door three times and I wait, handing in the pocket of my hoodie.
I wait a solid thirty seconds, which feel like an eternity, before the door finally opens and I see my beautiful girl. Her face is bare, hair only halfway straightened, and she's in those shorts I love and my old Led Zepplin t-shirt.
"Shawn," my name still sounds like heaven spilling from her lips. "What are you doing here?" She crosses and then uncrosses her arms, shifting her weight from one leg to the other before standing completely straight.
I didn't even realize I was crying until I sniffled and heard my voice crack with just three words, "I miss you."
"Shawn," she shook her head.
"I tried not to," I insisted, still standing like a fool on her door step. "I swear I did. But I couldn't stop. I looked through all our pictures and texts, and I couldn't stop myself from missing you. And I know I have no right to because I broke things off. But I was in Paris and I was miserable because Paris was your favorite place, and that was where I promised to love you forever, and I'm still keeping that promise. I was an idiot," I continue to ramble. "If there's a better word for that, then I'm that too, because I thought it would be easier if I broke things off. This tour was going to be so long and to go that long without each other, I was scared that it wouldn't be enough for you. But it's not what I wanted, y/n. It's not, and I just-"
"Shawn, stop."
I shut my mouth instantly, ready for her to tell me to leave. But what she does instead throws me completely off guard. She pulls me into the apartment and wraps her arms around my neck, burying her head deep in my chest.
"I miss you, too." She mumbles and I exhale slowly, only to inhale that scent that I love so much. The scent that is naturally her. She starts to pull away, and even though I don't want her to, I let her but she only leans back enough to take my face in her hands and before I even have time to blink, her soft lips are on mine and I'm whole again.
She's mine again and I'm never letting her go.
***
Tags: @curlyshawny @shawns-badreputation @anamariel2301 @bbellbagel
This took me longer to write than it should have, but I kinda really like it. I hope you enjoyed and I'll see you Wednesday for more content! 💙
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ottermoone · 5 years
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Tribute to Gwydion, Cat of cats
I lost my best friend two days ago. His name was Gwydion, and he was a few months shy of 12.
I was there the day he was born, in early 2007, when my neighbor knocked on our door and told us excitedly that her 2 cats were having kittens. I was 11 years old, in the 5th grade.
We hadn't initially expected to adopt a kitten, but the last litter of kittens had included a few white kittens, and my mother wanted another white cat, as we had lost an older white kitty who we'd both been very close to a couple years before. So we headed down and sat with a group of people, and watched the newborn kittens finally nuzzle up to their moms, a black cat named Hemy, and a tortoiseshell named Patches. Patches had a couple white kittens in her litter, and my mother asked the neighbor if we could adopt one of them when they were old enough.
5 or 6 weeks later, my mother came back up to our apartment with a small kitten. He was all white, except for his tail, which was orange and striped. I was told that he was only going to explore our apartment for a little bit before going back downstairs to his mom. I watched him run around excitedly, playing with my two other cats (Hercules and Persephone--both who hissed at him), and we laid out a shoebox filled with litter in case he needed to go, since he was so small we were afraid he'd get stuck in the regular litter box. He eventually used it, and squeezed out the tiniest and stinkiest poo I'd ever seen. I still remember it. My mother eventually took him back down to the neighbors', and a week or 2 later, he came to live with us permanently.
I didn't get to name him--my mother liked to give me the illusion of "choosing a name," which she'd then immediately reject before telling me what we were naming the animal. She initially told me we were going to name him Cernunnos, because she wanted a Celtic name for the cat, because of his coloring (white animals were considered sacred in Celtic mythology, apparently). She eventually rejected that name ("It sounds too much like 'Sir' ... Sir Lancelot, Sir Galahad...") and settled on Gwydion instead. It took me a full week before I was able to remember and pronounce his name (Gwid-ee-in).
My mother was an abusive hoarder, and we lived in poverty, so in the apartment we were living in at the time, we slept next to each other on a queen-sized memory foam mattress pad in the middle of the living room floor, surrounded by trash and clothes and other junk. So the first night we brought Gwydion home, he did what all kittens do and started pouncing on anything that moved underneath a blanket. Unfortunately, when we tried to sleep, that ended up being our toes. After a half hour of him pouncing on our toes, my mother got impatient and told me to lock him up in another room for the night.
He began crying almost immediately, and when I was sure my mother had fallen asleep (as I knew I'd get in trouble otherwise), I went back in and grabbed him, took him back to the mattress pad with me, and laid him on my chest. I pet him gently and constantly until he fell asleep there, and then finally fell asleep myself. When I woke up the next morning, he was still there, and we were inseparable forever after. Every night after that, he'd come and lay on my neck or my chest, purring and kneading.
Over the next year, he got more orange coloring in his fur, and my mother gave him less attention (I think because he wasn't the pure white cat she had wanted, and also because she was jealous of the bond we shared), until it was plainly obvious that he was my cat.
We both suffered extremely abusive and impoverished conditions together over the years that I won't delve into here. But throughout those years, wherever we were living, and whether he was mainly an indoor or outdoor cat at the time, every night, he'd come to where I was sleeping, cuddle up next to me or on my chest, and stay there until I fell asleep.
For several years, he and my other cat, Hercules, were forced by my mother to be locked in my tiny room, day in and day out, never being allowed out, unless they happened to slip out when the bedroom door opened, and then ran outside (as the front door was almost always open due to broken AC). In those years, he learned what crying meant, and eventually, when I'd start crying, he'd immediately be there, forcing his way into my arms or onto my chest, kneading and purring until I stopped crying and fell asleep.
There was a day where I had basically made up my mind to kill myself. I was almost 13, and had laid in bed all day, from the time I woke up until after night time, with blackout curtains drawn. I hadn't eaten anything, and it felt like time didn't exist. It was the emptiest I can ever remember feeling. I just lay there, feeling nothing. Eventually, after hours of thinking about the quickest and easiest way to die, my mind settled on drinking bleach. As I started to sit up, getting ready to walk out of my room, he was suddenly on my lap from out of nowhere, crawling up my chest, kneading and purring. As if he knew. Looking back now, I realize he had been laying next to me the entire time, but I had been so out of it that I hadn't noticed. At that moment, all feeling came rushing back, and I began crying, horrified at what I'd almost done. I hugged him and cried some more until I fell asleep.
We moved again after a few years, this time into government housing, and he was allowed to roam the apartment or go outside as often as he wanted. Still, every night without fail, when I laid down, he'd be there next to me.
A few days after my 18th birthday, I secretly brought all my important belongings to school with me, and moved in with my boyfriend. I hadn't been able to get Gwydion out because I hadn't wanted to raise my mother's suspicions before I left--we had stopped letting him outside as often because I didn't want him to get hurt. I had planned on it for weeks, though--my boyfriend had planned to show up that morning with a cat carrier as I quietly slipped him out the door and into my boyfriend's waiting car. But the night before, I realized my mother would notice if he were suddenly gone all day, and that it might hurt my chances of getting out, and if I couldn't get out, I couldn't ever get Gwydion out. So I let my boyfriend know not to come pick him up. It was one of the hardest decisions I ever made.
Those few months without him at night were rough, and I felt so guilty. But eventually, a few months later, my mother was evicted, and she asked me to take him and Hercules or they would be going to the pound. My boyfriend was super sweet and helped me pick them up, as well as necessary cat supplies, and thus began Gwydion's second life. He was 7 years old.
Gwydion had always been sweet to me, but he'd never been fixed, and he'd also been through abuse and lived outside part time, so he wasn't very sweet to other people. He also liked to spray. One of the first things we did was get him fixed and vaccinated. He immediately stopped spraying, and within a few short months, he was cuddling with my boyfriend as well.
For the first time, I was able to spoil him. He was able to walk and climb anywhere he wanted, he had multiple places to lay, he had access to a constant supply of food that never ran out, he had AC, he had a clean litter box, he had his best friend Hercules, he had two people doting on him, he didn't have fleas, and once every week, on Friday night, he'd get canned food. It took a little time, but eventually, he relaxed fully and began to enjoy himself, and he became an even more amazing cat, if that's even possible. He stopped laying on my chest every night, but that's mainly because he could come and lay on my chest or my boyfriend's chest at any time of the day he wanted. He would sometimes lay right on top of both of us at night though, which wasn't the most comfortable thing in the world, but it was still sweet.
Hercules was put to sleep a few years later, in November of 2016. Gwydion didn't eat for 3 days, and so I eventually took him to the vet, and they induced his appetite. Thankfully he ate after that, but he was very stand-offish for the next few months.
Around the same time, we got a new kitten from the nearby shelter, who we named Crono. At first, Gwydion cuddled with Crono, but after Hercules' passing, he began to growl and hiss at Crono, and eventually, Crono learned to leave him alone. Feeling bad that Crono had no one to play with, we eventually got a 3rd cat from the same shelter, an 8 month old kitten, who we named Noctis. Noctis and Crono became immediate best friends, and within a month, Gwydion began being his old self again too, grooming the other two and even playing with them at times.
We moved a few months later, this time into a bigger apartment with a backyard and multiple windows, and we got a cat tree. Gwydion had always loved sunbathing, and so he loved this apartment. He could walk almost anywhere in the apartment and have access to a window. He also continued playing with the other two for a little while, which meant he gained a little muscle and evened out to a healthy weight. He was so happy I swear he glowed.
Unfortunately, a few months ago, he started losing weight rapidly, even though he was eating more. For reasons I don't want to explain here, including the fact that he was no longer cleaning himself, I realized a few days ago that this was it, and to keep going just because I adored him would be selfish of me. In my teens, I had seen multiple animals die without the benefit of euthanasia. I couldn't bear the thought of him having to go through that, and I realized he was getting close. So I made the hardest decision I've ever made, and chose to help him go.
My boyfriend and I were able to get a vet to visit us, as he'd always hated car trips. He got to spend his last day sun bathing, getting his favorite canned food, and his favorite treats. He spent his last hour cuddling on my lap. He was too tired and weak to lay up on my chest. I pet him gently and constantly as he lay there, and he passed quietly as I stroked him and told him I loved him.
It still doesn't feel entirely real. The moments when it does, the pain cuts deeper than a hot knife. I will be honest--I don't believe in an afterlife. I wish I did. Because then I might get some solace from the "Rainbow Bridge" poem, or the multitude of pictures assuring me that he's in heaven now, watching over me. But I will never see him again. He is gone. He'll never come up to me again, kneading and purring and booping my face. I'll never hear his sassy little voice again. It's going to take a long time to fully process. But I do know this: if angels were real, he'd be one. I wouldn't be alive today if it weren't for him. I wouldn't know the meaning of unconditional love, and I wouldn't be who I am or where I am now without having had the honor of having him in my life. So no matter the pain that continues to come in waves as reality settles over me, I will never regret bringing that little kitten with the stinky poop, who pounced on my toes while I tried to sleep, home.
I love you so much, baby boy. I am glad you existed at the same time as I did. I will carry the memory of you with me for as long as I live.
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One of our first nights together.
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Stuck in my room together. One of the few times he wore a collar. He tore it off not long after this picture was taken.
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After he moved in with me and my boyfriend. Very relaxed and carefree
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Pretty boy ❤️
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Arm hugging and purring like crazy
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Gwydion and Hercules: best friends
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Part 2
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Cuddling with one of our rats, Rosa
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Cuddling with Crono when he was a kitten
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The last picture taken, a week ago: cuddling with Noctis.
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Rest in peace, baby kitty.
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