#2. and I’ve been paying for stuff on behalf of other people AND SOME have just not paid me at all ASSUMING I just got it for them

[nomadmilk]

😒 really

Heads up. If you don’t wanna’ see venting on your dash. Block #🐄imdone

[sl-newsie]

Spelled (Carlos de Vil x Sanderson Daughter) Descendants 2- Ch. 1: Letting Go

It’s been 2 months since I’ve left Auradon Prep. Part of me says it’s saddening to be left alone with 2 cats in the middle of the woods. But on the other hand it’s been so liberating! I’ve finally mastered the difficult draughts and elixirs in mother’s spellbook, as well as being able to move objects with my mind.

The empathy path between me and Carlos has helped keep me updated on how things are back at school, letting me know that my true love has been feeling content and happy. Which is… nice? Is it selfish of me to be jealous that Carlos is doing fine without me? Does he miss me as much as I miss him?

“Magica! I have returned!”

I keep stirring my moonlight elixir and pay the black cat little attention. “Greetings, Binx. Sorry if I’m a bit vague but I’m feeling dragged down today. Did you bring the ginger root I require?”

He hops up on a nearby stack of books. “Um… actually I brought something better-”

“Knock knock, trixie!”

My jaw drops. “No!” I open the door to find the 4 VKs standing on my doorstep and a wide grin sets on my face. “Goodness gracious! Hey, guys! Come on in!”

They’re just as I remember them! It seems longer than 2 months since I’ve seen them, and in the short time I can already see they’ve changed a bit. Most noticeable is that Carlos has grown his hair out a bit.

Evie looks ecstatic as she examines my newly-colored hair. “I must say, your new look is stunning! Why purple?”

“Yeah, well… I kinda got inspiration from Mal. This year purple is the new pink!”

They all give me one big hug and then start taking a look around my small dwelling.

“Wow. You’ve really gotten hooked on this witch stuff,” Jay gawks when he sees my overflowing shelves of books and potion vials. “Hey Binx- think fast!” He tosses the black cat a ball of twine, which Binx bats away at like a madman- er, madcat.

“Sorry I didn’t tidy up, but in my defense it isn’t often I get visitors. Once in a while FG drops by to see how I’m doing, but other than that the only conversation I get is with Binx.”

“That sounds lonely,” Carlos frowns.

I shrug. “It took some getting used to but I actually enjoy it. So, why the pop-in?”

“We wanted to stop by to invite you to Ben and my Cotillion next week,” Mal says as she examines my herbs. Meanwhile Evie keeps taking sneak peaks in my closet and mentally judging the wrinkled clothes.

“Is that… like a dance or something? Also yes, Evie, I know my clothes aren’t the best. But when you live in the woods you lower your expectations!”

She pouts and crosses her arms. “Fine. But when you come to cotillion I’m making you a proper gown!”

I frown. “Who says I’m going?”

“We do, because we miss you!” Carlos pulls me in for a hug and my heart does a flip.

“Aw, you’re too kind, Freckles. Oh! Evie, how’s the fashion business going?”

The blue-haired VK’s eyes light up. “I’m already booked with dress orders! Doug’s been helping me set up a real designer business!”

Ooh, I bet Doug’s loved that! I really hope they stay together.

“So what should I do for Cotillion? I’m a weird scary witch, remember? I haven’t spent 2 months alone in the woods for nothing!”

“You’ll be an honorary guest on behalf of Ben and me.” Mal takes my hand and gives me a stern look. “If people have a problem with that, they take it up with us.”

“We actually came here for another reason…” Jay eyes Mal, who snickers.

“We need your help to brew a catastrophe draught for a school prank. I’ve got a spell from my book that’ll heighten its power, then we’re-”

“We’re going to dip some apples in it and give them to the other students!” Jay laughs. “It’s gonna be hilarious!”

Evie smiles. “And we know your mom’s spell book would have the best recipe, since your aunt’s into crazy potions and all.”

My mouth twists into a lopsided grin. “Gonna make ‘em all dance, huh? Sounds familiar.”

Carlos nudges me playfully. “Thought we’d take a page out of your book. So will ya help us out?”

I look around at the VKs’ hopeful faces and smirk. “And waste a moment to make Audrey look like a complete fool? Definitely!”

“Um, actually she’s been away visiting family for summer vacation.”

I rethink. “Then we’ll make Chad look like a complete fool! Let’s get started.”

After emptying my moonlight elixir I start scurrying around and preparing the proper ingredients for the catastrophe draught while the others pull out a bag of apples and find the spell in Mal’s book.

“Think FG will suspect I’m involved?”

Jay shakes his head and keeps playing catch with Binx. “Nah. You’re all she talks about in goodness class. Always going on about how ‘evil triumphs over good!’ and your whole spiel about ‘don’t let your heritage define your future.’ All that nice stuff.” 

“Let’s give Auradon a taste of evil…” Mal says smugly as she tosses some apples into my cauldron.

“Well, this’ll do the trick! With my mom’s magic brew and your spellbook bewitchment this’ll turn the whole school into a gang of hooligans! I wish I could see it.”

Out of the corner of my eye I see Jay give Carlos a nudge.

“You could come back, you know.” The freckled VK gets closer and I try to ignore my racing heartbeat. Don’t get your hopes up, Magica.

I keep stirring the draught and shake my head. “I’m sorry, Carlos. But it’s best if I stay in hiding until I can make my appearance at the cotillion.”

By now the brew starts glowing an aqua green and is ready for Mal’s spell.

“Wicked ways beneath the skin, let all who taste it now join in!”

We pluck the apples from the draught and they turn a bright red, causing Mal to nod in approval.

“Perfect.” She gathers them into a bag and turns to head off for the door, motioning for the others to follow.

“You’ll be at cotillion, right?” Evie asks in a hopeful voice.

At first I’m against it, but the thought of spending another two months alone here makes me cave.

“Oh, alright! Count me in!”

Jay gives me a thumbs-up and Carlos tugs me in for one last hug.

“See you soon, trixie!”

“Maybe try to stop by before cotillion?” Carlos asks after planting a quick kiss on my lips.

My smile falters but I keep a steady head. “I… might pop in for a visit.”

The VKs give a wave before shutting the door and leaving me with a very worn-out Binx.

“Had fun? You could have informed me you were bringing guests, Binx.”

“And spoil that face you had when you opened the door? Never!”

I finish cleaning up my workstation and sweep the dirt from the floor outside. “It’s just that I’d like more of a warning. There’s some magic I’ve learned that I’m not exactly fond of sharing at the moment.”

The truth is, I’ve been practicing more magic from mother’s book than I’ve let on to Fairy Godmother. She sent some approved spellbooks and potion manuals, but doesn’t know about my spellbook. I’ve found and used many useful spells, none of the dark ones. Just enough knowledge to know when to draw the line. In doing so, my usual pink magic has turned into a deep purple. I feel that if I reveal just how much I’ve read into then I’ll be grounded to learning only pocket spells again. I am no mere child to be monitored- I am a Sanderson witch.

Carlos’ POV

We get back to school and head off to start handing out the bewitched apples. I find Dude waiting for me in the gardens with an expectant look on his face.

“Sorry, bud. She’s not coming. At least for now.” 

It really tore me up when I had to leave Magica alone again, but at least this time I have an idea of when I’ll see her again.

Before I pass around my helping of apples, Jay nudges me over to a corner.

“Real quick before the fun begins, I gotta say something about trixie. Sorry to say this Carlos, but you might wanna start thinking about finding another girlfriend? One who’s… actually around?”

He thinks I- what?

My jaw drops. “How can you say that? You know I love her, Carlos! Magica’s one of the only people I completely trust. Just ask Dude!”

My canine friend joins my side and gives a loud bark as he hops up and down at the sound of Magica’s name.

But Jay’s still looking doubtful. “She says she wants to be left alone. I’d say that’s a fair turning point for any relationship you guys have.”

She- she- But she only wanted to be alone because she thought she was dangerous! Because she doesn’t like people… Isolation, being excluded… Is that a sign that she doesn’t want to be in my life? After all, every time I’ve asked her to hang out with us she’s refused and acted distant. If that’s truly what she wants…

“But you know how much she’s had to go through! If I consider this then it’ll tear her apart.”

Jay takes out an apple and tosses it between his hands. “I know, I know. But some good things aren’t meant to be. She’d say something if she wanted to be with you. Sometimes you need to let things go.”

He goes off to start spreading mischief and leaves me with Dude, who lets out a whine.

“I know, buddy. I miss her too.”

Maybe it is time to start letting things go...

[we-have-bangtan]

I summoned you

Random one-shot #3

Pairing: demons!OT7 x witch!reader

Genre: fluff, fluff and more fluff, poly au

warning: swearing, its hella longggggg. <33

Part 2

Synopsis: The seven most powerful demons in the world were summoned for the first time in over a hundred years only to find out that their summoner is a little witch who was being hunted by witch hunters. She seeks protection from them but at what cost?

“Who the fuck summoned us?” Hoseok groaned feeling the familiar pain of transformation go through his body, “I don’t know but it better be worth it, I’m getting too old for this shit” Seokjin groaned as pain shot through his veins, black, bat-like wings erupting from his back as he fell to the ground in pain, the scars on his body burning up.

          Namjoon wasn’t much better either, biting into a pillow as burning pain took over his head, his horns and fangs coming out for the occasion, it had been over a hundred years since they had last been summoned and they were bearing the pain of not transforming in all there years, Jungkook hissed as he felt his tailbone extend out of his body, piercing through his skin to form a tail.

Jimin and Tae held each other as each of their left eyes glowed bright, screaming as they changed from black to red, “I hope it isn’t an accident again or I’ll eat them alive” Jungkook groaned as he pulled himself off the ground grimacing at the pain that shot through his body.

Yoongi was the only one not in pain because he had been living in his demon form for a few years now, he didn’t have to transform.

“The spell was lost, I don’t know how someone is summoning us” he informed as Seokjin opened the portal to the mortal world, the portal would take them to where ever they were being summoned.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

 Y/n anxiously stared at the pentagram she had drawn on her cottage floor, she’d be over if this spell didn’t work. She could hear the villagers approaching, could see the glow of their torches from her window. They were climbing up the hill, coming for her life, this spell was her only way of living.

She didn't know why the villagers had turned on her so easily when she had never done anything to them. She had kept her witchcraft confined to her cottage and its surroundings, but they seemed to have found out, she would blame the church people for that, because they were at the beginning of the uprising egging the villagers on.

They had almost caught her an hour ago when she had gone down for supplies, her arms were bruised from their assault but she had managed to escape from them, but she could run anywhere except her cottage.

She couldn't run anymore, there was no where to run now, she either had to stand and fight, which she was too weak for, or she had to perish, which she was too stubborn for so she had taken to the last resort, the demon spell.

Her magic wouldn't be enough to Wipeout all the people who were marching up the hill to her cottage, they'd burn her on the stake if they caught a hold of her, it would be a death with no pride or honor.

She felt the air shift around her, the salt grains blowing here and there and the candles flickering, the wind picked up speed outside as a portal opened directly above the pentagram and a demon fell out, falling to the ground with a thud and a groan. She moved to help him up but quickly stopped as a scream came from inside the portal before six other demons fell on the first one. Chaos ensured as each of them yelled at the other to get off their wings or tails or any other body part, she loudly cleared her throat to grab their attention making seven pairs of eyes snap to her.

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"Did you summon us little girl?" Namjoon asked as he took in her condition, she was awfully malnourished, her arms bruised and frail, she was a timid little thing who he assumed wasn't much younger than Jungkook before he had been changed into a demon. The girl nodded, holding a wand in her hand, a witch, Seokjin realized before he focused on her arms, “How did you summon us little witch” he asked, he was pretty sure the spell to summon them was a 21+ spell and she barely looked 18+ to him.

           “with the spell of course although I didn’t know it would summon seven of them, I would have drawn a lager circle had i known” she mumbled making Yoongi gawk at her statement, “HOW THE FUCK DO YOU CAST A SUMMONING SPELL WITHOUT KNOWING HOW MANY DEMONS IT WOULD SUMMON?? WE COULD HAVE RIPPED YOUR THROAT OUT THE MOMENT WE SHOWED UP HERE” Hoseok barked, snapping his fangs at her.

 “I know, no need to be an arse about it” she retorted as Hoseok stared at her in disbelief, “well then why did you summon us little witch?” Taehyung intervened, “I need help,” she stated plainly. This piqued Jimin’s interest, they all were clearly thinking the same thigh judging from the look in their eyes, they were mates, he knew how they thought, “Are you sure you can pay the price for our services darling” Seokjin remarked sweeping his eyes over the mostly bare cottage. 

            This girl was clearly living alone, a cauldron with coals under it sat in one corner of the house and a winding staircase lead up to attic which he assumed was her bedroom. Clothes hung to dry near the fire place in another corner of the house, her cupboards were mostly empty other than a loaf of bread and a tin of something he couldn’t recognize. She clearly didn’t have much to give.

“What is your price?” She asked, Yoongi admired her guts, she was clearly working hard on trying to seem unafraid, although she failed miserably, at least she tried. The seven of them thought for a while when they head a loud bang on the door. The girls eyes widened in fear, “they’re here” she cursed as she cast a colloportus spell on the door, “hurry up please” she pleaded, “what’s going on? what help do you need?” Jungkook asked as Seokjin place a shield over the door blocking the people from coming in for a short while.

                “They’re hunting me and i want them gone” she revealed, the boys looked up at her, “how sure are you that we won’t rip your throat once you set us free from this circle” Yoongi asked, “I don’t have anything to lose if you kill me the moment i let you free, I don’t have much to live for anyway” she answered, “we’ll discuss the price once we’re done” Namjoon warned as she cast the aqua eructo spell, a stream of water sprouting from the tip of her wand, wiping the circle of salt away just as a window shattered, glass spilling everywhere.

               “Jimin, get her somewhere safe” Namjoon commanded his mate, the younger demon nodded dutifully before stepping forward and wrapping an arm around her waist, positioning his wings, “hold on tight” he warned as he too to the air, going out through the back door of the cottage, taking her to the roof of the cottage, “stay here while we sort that stuff out” he told her, taking off to join the others.

        They possessed the humans, making them kill each other or they’d simply burn them to a crisp, she had expected them to be strong and powerful, but not this powerful, powerful to wipe out all the people who had come to attack her. She didn’t pay much heed to the humans who ran into the forests, she didn’t care where they went as long as they didn’t come near her or her cow, Morphus, who was currently in the shed, a little away from the clearing she lived at. 

  She noticed one of the church men trying to climb the roof to get to her but she quickly jinxed him, making him fall off the roof. Half way through the battle, Yoongi called in quits because the boys could deal with it without him, he joined Y/n on the roof top, folding his wings carefully to not hurt her, “Why don’t you just move from here, go fin some other forest to live in” he asked, leaning back on his hands, looking up at the sky, “there’s no where else to go, I’ve been running for too long” she answered and with that all conversation subsided as they both watched the others fight, Yoongi noticed a few people running for the forests and jerked up to go after them only to be stopped by Y/n, “let them be,” she said and he obey’d.

_____________________________________

_____________________________________

It didn’t take the demons long to finish everyone, they all gathered in her kitchen, Jin and Taehyung were hurt, but nothing big, just minor wounds according to the two demons but she insisted on tending to their injuries with a warm cloth and some potions, “this will scar” she told Jin, feeling guilty all of a sudden, “one of a million, don’t worry” he smiled as she wrapped his almost fully healed hand up.

“what is this?” Jungkook asked as he peered down the mug on Y/n’s table, “banana milk” she answered as she turned to Taehyung to wrap his wound up too, Jungkook took a sip of the milk before downing the whole mug, “do you have more?” he asked, looking like a child who wants an extra treat, she nodded, getting up to pull out a jar full of it from her cupboard, handing it to the boy, she didn’t seem the least bothered that a demon boy was drinking up all her banana milk. 

“so what is the price I have to pay? if you’ll hurry up, I have cleaning to do” she said looking at the dead bodies scattered all around her house, some even on tree branches. The boys looked at each other, “We’ll need some time to discuss” Namjoon said on behalf of them all, “you do that and I’ll clean that up” she said, grabbing her wand and leaving the house.

“So, what now?” Namjoon asked once he made sure she was far away from them, “I don’t think she can really give much, she barely has anything herself” Hoseok said, scanning the room again, “This place is nice tho, although she could use some more things in it” Seokjin admitted, looking around the peaceful cottage, it was clean, and would look beautiful if it wasn’t so bare, “it is” Namjoon admitted when Jimin’s piped up, “I don’t like the fact that she lives like this, she could die any moment and no one would notice, maybe we can come here more often” he suggested, already planning all the things he’d bring here from the underworld, Namjoon nodded, “it has been way too long since I’ve actually seen the sky, donno why mortals have to have all the good things when they die so easily” he huffed as he looked out of the window, looking down at the valley in which the village nestled.

        “I have an idea hyung, why don’t we use her place as a sort of abode, she can offer her house to us when ever we want in exchange for our services” Taehyung offered and Namjoon and Seokjin agreed, it would be nice to come to the mortal world often, “is everyone fine with that?” he asked the others, none of them rejected the idea and soon enough, Y/n was called back in.

   They explained what they wanted and she just stared at them, dumbfound, “why would you want to come here when you can live luxuriously in the demon world?” she asked, “the demon world is not all its cooked up to be” Jimin answered.

It took a little convincing (threatening) to get her to agree but she did.

________________________________

________________________________

The boys were common visitors to her little cottage, each of them would show up on their own accord and timing with their own reasons, often in their human form, she had been surprised to see how much more handsome the seven of them were in their human forms and she had told them so.

             They would show up with little things that she would need around the house, sometimes unnoticeable and sometimes ridiculous, they’d bring her small fancy plates and saucers, fabrics and potion ingredients and even a new wand once before they progressed to bringing bigger things like vases and pillows and rugs despite her protesting.

Namjoon was the first to show up at her door with a book in hand to see books about the seven of them scattered on her table. They had stopped popping up directly inside the house after Y/n had yelled at them for freaking her out, “reading up on us I see” he commented as he dragged a chair to sit, “I’ll have to because i literally don’t know anything about the seven of you” she mumbled as she read on. They both read their books in silence before Y/n offered him tea which he accepted gratefully.

  Seokjin and Jungkook were the next one’s to show up because they were hungry, she served them with honey bread and maple syrup. Seokjin showed a keen interest in cooking, offering to help her out while she cooked for the three of them, since then, he’d show up during meal times to eat with her and cook with her, it became something the two of them got used to and one of the greatest things Seokjin would miss once she had passed.

   Jungkook and her bonded over banana milk, the boy couldn’t get enough of it, even taking some back to the demon realm only to come back for more the next day. They both would wander the forest in search of bananas and maple trees and make the banana milk together, he was the most frequent visitor that even Morphus had started to recognize Jungkook who would sit next to Y/n when she milked the cow every morning.

Tae and Jimin would often come together just to mess with her and to make a fool out of the villagers down in the valley. They went herb searching together in the forests. They’d pick flowers for the house and they even dug up a well for the little cottage to use.

Hoseok would also come by often just to gossip with her, telling her about all the events in the demon world, they both would talk over tea and little cakes about Namjoon’s snoring and Seokjin’s new obsession with bad jokes. On days which were not too hot or too cold they’d set up a table outside and just bask in each others company.

Yoongi was the last to visit her, and even when he did visit, he decided to take a nap only to get back up complaining about how bumpy the mattress was before vanishing off and coming back with a new mattress. They’d nap together on days Y/n didn’t have anything to do, and had been found wrapped up with each other by the other quiet often. 

They’d all come together once every few days to have lunch and dinner and to talk and play, enjoying the sun and grass and flowers before they had to go back to the demon world.   

It was funny to see the seven strongest demons be so gentle and ind to a little human girl, weaving flower crowns for her and laying their head in her lap, taking cat naps together.

_____________________________

_____________________________

They seven boys got quiet attached to the little witch, trying to meet her as often as possible and be as gentle as possible to her. Imagine their surprise when Namjoon walked in on a sorcerer sitting on one of the chairs as Y/n made him a cup of tea. 

“A demon!” the sorcerer shrieked as Namjoon came inside the house, Y/n slowly turned around to see Namjoon standing st the door, greeting him with a smile and a kiss to his cheek, “Namjoon-ah meet my mentor, the great Sorcerer Potter” she introduced as Namjoon felt a green knot form in his chest, he was sure the rest of his mates felt it too because a portal opened not soon after, tossing the 6 other boys into the mortal world, all of them looking eerily calm, “why is he here y/n? he questioned, “he just came to visit” she explained, “then why is his smell all over you?” Jungkook demanded, grabbing her wrist to get a scent of her.

“get lost” Yoongi hissed at the sorcerer, the powerful man shrieked as he apparated to who knows where. “Y/n,” Hoseok said, taking her hands in his, “did he touch you” he asked, his voice low, she shook her head, no, no one had touched her, thank the demons, Jimin thought as he enveloped her in his arms, overpowering the sorcerer’s smell with his own. “good, don’t let anyone touch you except for us little witch” Seokjin mumbled as he placed a kiss on her forehead, she hummed in agreement as they all bundled up in her cozy cottage, now a lot more comfortable and colorful than before.

They loved her but they couldn’t have her because demons didn’t deserve happiness, it was a curse on them, they weren’t meant to love, only hate and kill because even if they loved y/n they’d inevitably end up with a part of their heart hollow because demons couldn’t love little witches because demons were immortal while witches would meet their end soon enough.

None of them laid with their little witch because it was forbidden but they did caress her, they held her close and made her feel warm and loved by each of them, they were tender and careful with her, trying to spend every moment with her and while that might seem like too much for a mortal, it was a mere few moments for immortals and they tried to carve her memory into their hearts and minds so they would never forget her despite how much time passed by.

___________________________________

___________________________________

The eight of them spent 86 years together, Y/n passed due to illness at the ripe age of a hundred and twelve years with a smile and her seven demons surrounding her when she too her last breath.

The demons wished she’d reincarnate bu they didn’t keep much hope in that because demons wishes were never fulfilled. But they lived on with the memory of the little witch who had summoned them and had carved herself into their cold, dark hearts.

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Y/n's cottage

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First try, how was it? let me know!!!!

[icycoolslushie]

THG Thomastair AU

“I wish we could find sanctuary,” Thomas said. “You know, with shelter and such.”

“But Thomas,” Alastair said, “you are my sanctuary.”

TW/CW: If you're reading this, you've probably read The Hunger Games books or watched the movies so this has the same stuff as in them!

Idea // OG post // Ask

Disclaimers: This has headcanons along with snippets. Hopefully it's not OOC. Any Persian is what my Iranian friend told me. I like to headcanon that all the districts have their own language. Warning: The plot might be non-existent. Also, if you see any kind of mistakes (grammar, spelling, etc.) please let me know! Kinda long :)

Thomas is from District 7

Alastair is from District 11

The president is Josiah Wayland

The Head Gamemaker is Maurice Bridgestock

Eugenia is part of a group to overthrow the Capitol

Barbara and Oliver died in a previous Hunger Games

It was like it was in the books

Alastair used to be in a relationship with Charles Fairchild, son of the mayor of District 11, Charlotte Fairchild

Risa is Sona’s sister so Alastair’s aunt

Alastair volunteers for Cordelia

Cordelia struggles with him and finally says in “I love you” in Persian (dooset daram) before Alastair goes on the train

Cordelia is like Prim

Alastair’s mentor is Ragnor Fell

They be sassy together

Thomas’s mentor is Charlotte

Alastair’s stylist tells him Alastair should dye his hair back to black

In the opening ceremony, Thomas dresses as a tree and Alastair thinks how Thomas makes “a boring costume look beautiful”

Alastair has a suit on with leaves embroidered on it which Thomas later tells him “it was like nature blessed you”

Jem may or may not be an Avox Jem is Alastair’s Avox

Thomas Tanner is Thomas’s Avox

For training Alastair throws spears and pulls a 8

Thomas uses a broadsword in training and pulls an 8 as well

Thomas gets a compass rose tattoo from his stylist for the interview

The arena has a structure that looks like the Eiffel Tower at one end

The arena is covered in forests, except for the Cornucopia

When the canon sounds, Alastair runs toward the Cornucopia and escapes with a dagger to the forest

Thomas runs straight (ha!) into the forest

9 children die in the initial bloodbath

Alastair and Thomas both spend the night in trees about ten minutes away from each other

In the morning, Alastair hears rustling and eventually confronts Thomas

They first try to kill each other, but then they hear someone else and work together to fight the District 9 male tribute

Alastair puts his dagger at the tribute’s throat and stabs him there

Alastair doesn’t want to partner up and vice versa

“Alastair—I think you’d be a great person to team up with, but I . . . I don’t want to team up with you. I don’t want to team up with anyone. We—we might survive till the end, and then—” “No, Thomas, I understand. We’ll pretend this never happened. We’ll go our separate ways.” Thomas nodded, a sinking feeling in his stomach. Part of him had been hoping Alastair would disagree with him, even when it was reasonable. He ignored it and set about laying the food they’d gathered.

But they gather food and decide they’ll have a meal together and then go their separate ways

They make a meal of some fruits they find on trees and on the ground

Thomas just cannot eat the celery

They part ways

By the second night, fourteen people in total are dead

Thomas goes to the Eiffel Tower structure the next day

He climbs onto the first level and greets Alastair

Alastair’s leg is wounded

Alastair explains that the Careers fought him

The Careers include Augustus Pounceby and Clive Cartwright

“Tell me. Tell me who hurt you. I’ll kill them.” Alastair had never seen anyone so angry on his behalf that it unnerved him. “It doesn’t matter, it was the Capitol—” “Don’t,” Thomas said quietly. “Don’t try to downplay it. I want to make them pay.” Alastair paused. After a minute he said, “It was the Careers. The District 1 and 2 tribute. Augustus and Clive. They climbed onto here and started fighting me. I gave Augustus a good cut on the arm and Clive a nice scar on his cheek but they overpowered me. Augustus stabbed my leg. They left laughing.” “They didn’t finish you off?” Alastair shook his head. “I think they . . . wanted me to suffer. It isn’t like I can go anywhere, and I have no allies, so probably wanted to come back tomorrow and then finish me off. But it’s not like I’m going to last that long.” The last sentence caught Thomas off guard. “What?” “Aren’t you going to kill me?” Thomas thought about the District 1 tribute, Augustus, who had been saying that Barbara was weak before the Opening Ceremony. That Barbara, who had gotten him out of a scuffle with a Peacekeeper, was weak. That Barbara, who had volunteered for her cousin in the Reaping, was weak. He thought about the hate he had felt for the Career. Then he thought about graceful, elegant, bleeding Alastair in front of him, the way he had hugged his sister, the way he guarded himself, and decided. “No,” he said. “I’m not going to kill you.”

Thomas bandages Alastair’s wound

“Alastair, you’re hurt. Please let me wrap your leg in leaves and vines.” “Thomas, you don’t understand. I’ve always bandaged my own wounds. It’s not going to change now.” “Sometimes,” Thomas said, “it’s better to let others take care of you. They do a better job than you realize. Alastair, please. You’re bleeding. Let me help.” Alastair saw something in Thomas’s eyes: truth. He thought back to how many people would want to help him: his father, his mother, his aunt Risa . . . when he was young. As he grew up, all of them faced the same cruel system and all of them were expected to take care of their own wounds. Now, here was someone willing to help him when he should be killing him. It gave Alastair such a feeling of care and belonging that he nodded. It wouldn’t hurt to let someone take care of him for once.

They eventually decide to team up

Thomas makes a meal out of things he finds in the forest

He and Alastair eat it

Alastair heals from his wound

By that night, nineteen people are dead

Augustus, Clive, and the District 8 female tribute are still alive along with them

Alastair takes first watch during the night, Thomas takes the second

Alastair gently moved his fingers across the compass rose tattoo that Thomas had gotten from his stylist. He felt Thomas’s pulse. He promised himself that that pulse would go on even when his own didn’t.

The next day Alastair and Thomas set off (Alastair’s leg is healed)

Augustus and Clive are waiting for them

Thomas kills Augustus, attacking with A LOT of force

Clive gets a good hit on Thomas with a sword on his left arm

Alastair and Clive fight, Clive flees finally while he’s bleeding from a dozen cuts

Alastair bandages Thomas’s wound with leaves and vines

“I love it when you say my name. Say it again.” “Thomas—Thomas, you’ve lost too much blood. You’re going delirious.” Thomas sighed softly. “I would go delirious if that meant I could hear you say my name one more time.”

They get a sponsor gift: a whole meal of steak and sides, which they finish that day

When Alastair bites into an apple, Thomas wants to kiss him

Both of them fall asleep at night

When they wake up, they’re in a prison; a Capitol prison

They were in prison. But even if they were in hell, Alastair wouldn’t have minded. They were together.

They lie in each other’s arms, seeking warmth

“Why are we in prison? What did we do?” Alastair demanded, getting up as Josiah Wayland stuck his ugly face in front of the bars. President Wayland’s lip curled. “It isn’t you that did something, it’s your family.” Thomas gasped sharply. “Eugenia.” The president smiled cruelly. “So you do know her crime.” Thomas swallowed. Alastair put his hand in Thomas’s. “What did my family do?” Alastair asked, trying to change the topic. “Why, your sister did the same thing,” Josiah Wayland said. This time Alastair gave a sharp gasp. Thomas squeezed his hand, and Alastair drew a bit of comfort from him. But his mind was on Cordelia, his little sister, what would happen to her— Wayland, the monster he was, smiled wider as he saw Alastair and Thomas despairing their sisters’ fate.

Cordelia joined the same rebel group Eugenia was in

“But why are we here? What did they do that you had to take us out of the Games?” Thomas demanded when he had finally calmed down. It seemed that all the Lightwood siblings would all die in their youth. “As soon as they are in our custody, they will be executed. In front of you two. Everyone thinks the two of you killed each other. After they’re dead, both of you will be executed.” Thomas swallowed. “Why? Why will you execute us?” “Your sisters should have thought about your safety before they did what they did. At least you’ll be able to tell them goodbye. If the executioners give you the chance,” President Wayland added before he gave another cruel smile and left.

Thomas and Alastair despair over their and their sisters’ fates

“We’ll fight them. I don’t care. We’ll fight the Capitol. We’ll make them pay for what they did to Barbara and Oliver and Jem and Will and Tessa and my mom and every single person they hurt. We’ll make them pay, Alastair.”

Thomas sighed. “If only we had hope.” “I don’t think about hope, Thomas. I think about you. You’re my hope.” And now I’m going to lose you, Alastair wanted to add, but he didn’t. And then I won’t have any hope left.

“The odds were never in our favour, Thomas,” Alastair whispered, closing his eyes. Then he added softly, “And they never will be.”

Letter addressed to Alastair Carstairs, District 11 male tribute of the 56th Hunger Games, from Charles Fairchild, son of the mayor of District 11, found crumpled in a trash bin of the Training Center floor 11

Taglist: @della-vacker-supremacy @themadhatter999 @writeforjordelia @theenchanteddreamer Also tagging @jurdan-my-beloved who originally requested the headcanons and @youngreckless Lmk if you wanna be added or removed!

[mamahersh]

The Road to Hell (is Paved with Good Intentions)

“Season 8 was well underway, and the server’s first conflict is bubbling just under the surface. But BDoubleO can’t worry about that right now because he has an Etho to find so they can work on the Horse Course together. However when Xisuma calls a surprise server meeting on behalf of EvilXisuma, BDubs gets his answers about where Etho’s been in the worst way possible.”

(CW: angst, blood, gore) <--- later chapters, this one’s clean.

Welcome to my first attempt at Ethoslab angst! I wanted an nHo-centric fic with a heavy dose of Etho angst. I have nowhere else to post this, and fair warning I am terrible at characterizations, so everyone will probably be a bit OOC to some extent; but for sure EvilX will be very OOC in how evil he is in this one. The Rating for the later chapters is a solid M, so be warned about that. If y’all have suggestions or feedback, feel free to come and say hi! P.S. I got my inspiration for this fic from this fic over here! Give them some love too.

Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4 / Chapter 5 / Chapter 6 / Chapter 7

Chapter 1 (below the cut)

BDoubleO was worried. 

Now, it wasn’t often he worried, particularly about Etho. Especially after the shenanigans from Season 5 with the nHo, and their many years of collaboration after that, he was well aware that Etho had a habit of disappearing for weeks on end. Even when he was supposed to be helping with a bit of collaboration work like the Horse Course, he was infamous for suddenly disappearing for a week, and coming back acting like nothing had happened. But even still, Etho usually left a note, or told someone about where he was going so they at least knew when to approximately expect him to show back up. This time though, Etho hadn’t even left Iskall a note, and so far this season he had made sure to at least leave a note for Iskall since they were sharing a base. (BDoubleO had asked Iskall 3 days after the last time he had seen Etho to ask if he knew where Etho was. Iskall didn’t know, though he had seen him 2 days previously puttering around their shared base as normal.) He had asked around the other Hermits, seeing if anyone had heard anything. The only one that had seen anything was Beef, who had said he had seen Etho lurking on the edges of his territory heading toward the top of BDubs’ mountain with a spyglass about a day and a half ago. Doc had mentioned that while he hadn’t seen Etho recently, he had heard that Etho had been busy in talks with Xisuma and Evil Xisuma over something. However, when BDubs questioned Xisuma, he said he hadn’t seen Etho since the last major server meeting. (It was always disconcerting when Hermits’ stories didn’t match up, as that usually meant there were shenanigans afoot. But BDubs couldn’t figure out why there would be shenanigans afoot, because this was just Etho.)

A whinny from Lulu beneath him startled BDubs out of his worries. Looking around he realized that they were already staring up at Xisuma’s lighthouse and general base area. Why were they there you might ask? (A theoretical from a theoretical, truly meta of him, aha) WELL, Xisuma had sent out a message to the server that everyone should come and gather at his base for an important something. BDubs was confused, and very concerned, that Xisuma was insisting on the meeting being in person. After all, any news could be dispensed through the Server messages, and all their bases were known, so boards could be placed at bases for Hermits to see as they came in and out. Meeting in person was never technically necessary, though it made it generally easier to talk with each other since they didn’t have to type everything out. The point stood however, that unless it was an emergency, Xisuma never called a general Hermit assembly outside of their regularly scheduled monthly meetings. 

Looking around, BDubs was able to see that Beef was already there, along with most of the Boatem Crew, and surprisingly enough, the Horsehead Farms guys were there as well. Of course, Doc was on his way, and last he heard, the Big Eye crew was following up behind him since they both had been busy when the announcement had gone out. The rest of the server would be on their way because of how far out they were. (Part of BDubs wondered if those who were coming in later were the lucky ones. The rest of him wondered why he was so filled with anxiety and so certain this meeting was only going to be terrible.) Deciding nothing good would come of dwelling on the negatives, he made his way over to where Beef (who was looking more unrecognizable by the day as the alien contamination overtook him) was standing alone, seemingly keeping his eye out for someone or something.

“Hey Beef!” BDubs called out, smiling and waving as he approached. Beef looked over at the sudden shouting of his name, and instantly relaxed as he saw BDubs approaching. “Hey BDubs!” he called back, something alien layered under his normal voice. (It spoke of void and distant stars, though Tango had recently been saying it reminded him more of sulfur and brimstone). “You know anything about why Xisuma’s called this meetup?” asked Beef before BDubs could ask the question himself.

“Not a clue,” BDubs replied, allowing his concern to show through as he stood ill-at-ease beside his friend. “He just announced he had something he wanted to show or talk to us about I guess, though I can’t imagine what it could be about.” Well, BDubs had a guess or two, but none of them were generally pleasant topics of conversation, outside of some surprise announcement for the next server update to 1.18.

“Darn, I was hoping you would have heard something…” said Beef, his own unease easy to read. BDubs shrugged, looking around at the other groups of players standing outside the Lighthouse. It looked like even in the short time they had been greeting each other, the other Big Eyed Crew had arrived on his tailwind. An awkward pause settled between the two of them, both having been so tied up in their own shenanigans to really know what the other had been up to. BDubs debated bringing up the obvious, but it seemed like one of those things you don’t necessarily bring up. But then again… 

“Yo Beef,” said BDubs, turning to look at Beef again. Beef startled out of his momentary reverie. “You’ve been looking pretty, uh… green recently. How’s that been treating you?”

For a moment Beef looked almost confused, before he seemed to connect the dots and snorted. “Oh yeah, it’s been treating me great, as you can see.” They both chuckled a bit at his sarcasm before he continued. “But in all seriousness, I hadn’t really been noticing it. I mean, I definitely notice that people have been giving me a wider berth this season, which hasn’t been great for business since I have a great idea for selling specialty cat food I can make on my alien ship. I haven’t personally noticed too many changes outside my appearance thus far however.” After a moment Beef said, “So how about you? How have Keralis and Tango been treating you this season?”

BDubs chuckled. “Would you believe it if I told you it’s been going great? I have a mountain already, and we have a small bay town we’re building up to serve as a shopping district for our Big Eye Crew. Plus, we got Tango to actually make his eyes big, so it’s a win all around! Though I’ve been noticing more Derpcoin sneaking into our shops…” 

“Hey now, what’s wrong with Derpcoin?!” exclaimed Beef, looking vaguely offended. BDubs was startled by this, completely not expecting such an outburst from Beef of all people.

“I mean, there’s nothing necessarily wrong with it, it’s just I have no idea what the conversion rate is on the stuff, so I don’t know what people are paying in my shop for the items they’re buying,” replied BDubs. “Plus, there’s nowhere to use it.”

“But there is a place to use it! You could use it at EX’s Evil Emporium. Plus, with more people signing up for Derpcoin, it seems like a lucrative market to sell in,” countered Beef, a strange gleam in his eyes. “EX was nice enough to give me an in into his Derpcoin shopping district, so I’ll have a storefront through the Evil Emporium.” 

"Evil Emporium huh?" BDubs made a considering noise. "Heard a little bit about it back when EX was doing a little sales pitch in our neck of the woods. Seems pretty fishy to me, but if you think it's a trustworthy establishment, I'll definitely give it a second look."

"Attention everyone!" called out Xisuma, suddenly standing in the center of the gathered Hermits. "Your attention please!" BDubs looked over to where X was waving everyone over. He noticed that X seemed abnormally forward, though that could be attributed to his paranoia. Afterall, X wasn’t one to cause problems! Sure he had been trying to get people on board with this Evil Emporium thing pretty hard, but X couldn’t hurt a fly even on a good day, so BDubs wondered if this wasn’t about Derpcoin.

He had been hearing from the other Big-Eyed crew that tensions between Boatem and the Derpcoin empire had been slowly escalating over the last week or so. Plus he had been hearing about more of the unaffiliated Hermits beginning to create close ties with EX’s brand, embracing Derpcoin as their main currency even! On the other hand, he’d been hearing from some of the Boatem people about how they were getting sick and tired of finding Derpcoin in their shops, and seemingly some people were beginning to refuse to pay for items with diamonds… There was a mess brewing for sure in the background this season, it just seemed like an issue that could wait till the next monthly meeting is all.

With a jolt, BDubs was brought back to the present as Doc bumped him in the shoulder. “How are you doing BDubs? Looking pretty lost in thought there, big guy.” 

“Well, doing pretty good if you must ask!” BDubs puffed up with the compliment on his height, despite knowing it was more than likely meant in a sarcastic manner. Between Doc and Etho, BDubs never really could catch a break. “You just get here then?”

Doc let out a rumbly hum in agreement. “Yesss, though I have no idea why Xisuma called the meeting. Know anything?”

BDubs and Beef both shook their heads. “We’re in the dark as much as you are, it seems,” replied Beef, moving towards the other Hermits to try and get their little group to walk and talk.

“I have a theory though!” continued BDubs, leaning in to act somewhat more conspiratorially. Doc leaned in a bit more than he needed to, getting a friendly bump on the head from Beef. “See, I’m sure you’ve both heard a bit more than I have about Boatem vs the Evil Emporium. I think things might be heating up enough between the two that X might be forced to intervene soon.” BDubs rubbed the back of his neck. “Admittedly, it still seems like the kind of thing that he would bring up in the monthly meeting instead of an impromptu meeting like this.”

“Looks like we don’t have to wait long to find out in any case.” Beef gestured at the surrounding Hermits and Xisuma himself still standing at the center looking official as usual. (Though BDubs thought he looked a little dazed, but he shoved the thought aside.)

“Thank you everyone for taking time out for this meeting!” called out Xisuma, his face still disconcertingly empty. “I’ve called you together today because EX had a stream he wanted us all to watch, and I agree it is most imperative we all watch it together.”

BDubs did not like the sound of this one bit. “What’s the stream about?” called Joe from the opposite side of the crowd.

“Yeah, why’s it so important we all have to watch it?” asked Cleo from beside him. BDubs realized that those two had had to travel across the entire continent to come to the meeting, and Joe was still renouncing wings, so taking long trips was a distinct hassle. At the very least, it was far more time consuming than everyone else’s trips had been, minus potentially XB and Hypno’s trip.

Xisuma seemed to stand there taking it silently, which was not necessarily outside of the usual, but his response certainly was. “With that out of the way, I’ll get the screen set up, and then we can watch EX’s stream!” ‘That was strange,’ thought BDubs as he looked around the circle of bewildered Hermits. Normally X would try to answer questions, or at least let them know things precisely before he did them. It was incredibly out of character that he would just ignore Joe and Cleo like that… Particularly Joe and Cleo if BDubs was to be brutally honest. Those three had been closer than three peas in a pod since Season 2, and Joe and X had known each other pretty well since almost the start of Season 1. To have those two brushed off by Xisuma struck a wrong chord.

BDubs was pulled back to the present as Xisuma rapidly typed into his communicator, and a holographic screen projected just beyond the circle of Hermits behind where Cub was standing. Almost as one, the Hermits turned to look at it, curiosity overpowering any potential feelings of lingering confusion and discomfort.

Xisuma’s expression was blank as the large screen buzzed to life in front of them. However, BDubs’ watched as he seemed to come back to himself just as the static on the screen cleared and the assembled hermits gasped in disbelief and horror.

‘Well,’ thought BDubs to himself, dread rising like a wave about to swallow him whole. ‘Now we know where Etho went.’ For there on the screen, looking the worst BDubs had ever seen him, was a restrained Etho beside a seemingly gleeful EvilXisuma.

[xxdragonwriterxx]

🔥Wings of Freedom (Part 2)🔥

A/N: Finally got part 2 done! Thank you for your patience with this mini series, I’ve been so busy with school lately and I still have so many drafts that I’ve been trying to publish them evenly so I don’t keep you guys waiting for anything too long. Thank you so much for your support, I love all of you so much and I can’t wait to show you the other stuff I have  planned for this blog. I have a few requests on the way, so stay tuned for that, but for now, here is the sequel to Wings of Freedom (finally)!

Part 1 is here if you haven’t read it yet!

🐉Song Recommendation: “Machine” By: MisterWives 🐉

Word Count: ~3.9k

~~~

Levi felt like he was experiencing deja vu as he glanced around the courtroom from where he stood beside Erwin, waiting for Hanji to come back. Only, he felt a lot more nervous. The first time, he had felt nothing but an impatience to get the event started, his eyes hard and cold as he had looked down at an immature, green-eyed brat who could turn into a titan, waiting for his future to be decided as either a useful tool for humanity, or a human experiment to be tortured in a lab. Now, his insides were doing their best impression of a pretzel, churning and twisting until he felt sick with worry. This wasn’t going to be a meeting about some random brat from the streets, this was concerning the fate of the love of his life.

The night she had come back had been bittersweet for both of them. They had spent the night wrapped up together, (Y/N)’s wings out for the first time around Levi, the warm membranes curled around him protectively so he could feel her heartbeat thrumming through his entire body. They had been cuddled close, holding each other like it was the last time they would be able to do so, unsure of what events would unfold the next morning. Both Levi and (Y/N) knew everything was about to change, knew (Y/N)’s fate would be challenged and decided the next day, but it didn’t stop the anxiety from rolling around in his gut, making his stomach give another violent lurch.

“Hey,” Erwin said lowly, placing a hand on Levi’s shoulder when he noticed his friend’s queasy expression, “She’s going to be alright. We will fight for her with everything we’ve got.”

Levi managed a stiff nod in Erwin’s direction, his heart warming at his friend’s support. Although Levi had never doubted his friends, he had been surprised by how supportive and accommodating they had been when Levi had announced (Y/N)’s initial reappearance. They had both expressed their immense relief at her safe return while Hanji worked to heal her bullet wound, keeping her enthusiastic questioning to a minimum at Levi’s insistence.

Levi’s thoughts were cut short by the appearance of said energetic scientist, the tall brunette carefully picking her way through the rows of gathered officers and moving to stand on the other side of Erwin.

“She’s doing okay,” Hanji said before Levi could even open his mouth. “She’s a little nervous but that’s normal. Everything else is going smoothly so far, so she will be brought out in a few minutes.”

Levi nodded, not trusting himself to speak. He was trying his hardest to stay calm, to keep from lunging at Premier Zackley and strangling him until he promised to let (Y/N) go, but it was starting to strain on him. His skin broke out in a sweat as he forced himself to take deep breaths. He could do this. For (Y/N), he could do this.

He immediately looked up at the sound of the large wooden doors opening with a loud creak, his attention settling on the (h/c) haired woman handcuffed between two guards, her head down so her hair curtained her expression from others. His eyes narrowed and a low growl slipped from between his lips at the sight of the bruises on her arms and legs from the chains and cuffs she had been wearing in her cell. His blood was roaring in his ears as he fought every instinct he had to swoop down and bring her back into his arms. He had almost lost her once, he wouldn’t lose her again, no matter the cost.

Her wings were hidden, the huge black membranes tucked safely in the slits of her back, away from the prying eyes of the assembled soldiers. That at least gave Levi some relief, the knowledge that the extra sensitive appendages were kept from harm or unwanted touch.

The dull chatter in the courtroom hushed as (Y/N) was brought to the center of the room, pushed into a kneeling position on the same platform Eren had been placed on just a few years prior. One of the guards holding her leaned down and clapped her manacles to the sturdy metal post behind her, double checking that she was secure before backing away, moving with the other guard to stand on either side of Premier Zackley, guns at the ready.

The room was so quiet you could’ve heard a pin drop. The people in the room barely breathed as they waited impatiently for Zackley to finish preparing his notes, eager to see if they rumors were true. The Premier cleared his throat, shuffling the papers in front of him as he peered down at the woman on the platform from over the top of his glasses.

“(Y/N) (L/N)?”

(Y/N) looked up when her name was called, her eyes hard as she stared up at the older man. 

“Yes.”

“Member of the Survey Corps. Age (#). Cadet under the command of Squad Leader Hanji Zoe,” Zackley read off, glancing at her after every sentence for her quick nod of confirmation. “It looks like you have no criminal record, but your place and date of birth are unknown, so that technically can not be confirmed nor denied outside of the information gathered during your time as a soldier.”

(Y/N) swallowed hard but did not respond, waiting, just as Hanji had told her to do, for the Premier to make his point. She took a deep breath, forcing herself to be patient, knowing that if she rushed this, if she wasn’t careful, she could easily be thrown to the wolves.

“It looks like, based on these reports, that you are a loyal soldier who has a clean background, a solid record, and a hard working personality, since it is labeled here that you are about to be promoted to Squad Leader,” the Premier leaned forward, “that means, we are here for a different reason entirely. Tell me, do you know why you are here?”

“Yes,” (Y/N) answered clearly.

“Very good. Now, without further ado, this court is now in session.”

As soon as Zackley opened the floor, a man from the Military Police stood, a smug grin on his face as he glanced at the annoyed scowls of the Survey Corps officers who were watching him.

“Premier Zackley, thank you for that wonderful introduction,” the man started off, making Levi roll his eyes so hard they hurt. “I would like to start off on behalf of the Military Police and say that this woman should be placed in our custody.”

The Survey Corps officers exchanged glances at that. They had been expecting the man to rant on and on about how she should be tortured, experimented on, or killed, not taken in by another branch of the military. The one closest to the King, no less.

“Interesting, state your case,” Zackley said, folding his hands in front of his face.

“We believe she could be of great use with us, sir. She could be a viable source of protection for our current ruling monarch, and we could use her to increase funding for our resources and supplies. Nobles would come from miles around to see her, it’s something we can use to better the lives of all of the soldiers in the military! Instead of groveling for money at their feet, we could charge them to come see her, within the safety of the walls, perfectly ready to display for anyone who is willing to pay.”

(Y/N) had to fight to keep from grimacing in disgust at the thought of being constantly gawked at like some kind of freak, put out for people to see as if she were some sort of entertainment for them, rather than a human being trying to fight for humanity.

“What use is earning money from her like some kind of exotic beast if our soldiers keep dying?” Erwin cut in, making (Y/N)’s eyes soften at the sound of her friend’s hard voice trying to make others see reason. “She is needed in the Survey Corps with us, it’s what she was made for. She can continue to fight against the titans with us, allowing us to give her the proper protection as she uses her gifts to make fighting these man-eating monsters a hell of a lot easier. She would waste away if she was stuck within the walls with the Military Police.”

“Well, as I see it, Commander Erwin, she can’t be trusted outside of the walls with you. She hid this for how long? How many years now has she let her comrades die over and over again, never stepping in to save them? According to her reports, she didn’t try to assist any of you during your missions other than with the normal efforts displayed by every soldier, at least, until she apparently saved Captain Levi. And rumor has it, those two are sexually involved with one another, which would make for that incident to be purely based on bias rather than a change of heart. If she really was meant to be a helpful tool for humanity, she would’ve become that by now.”

Erwin shook his head, his hand reaching out slightly to touch Levi’s forearm when the shorter raven-haired man opened his mouth to retort. “She has already explained to us her reasoning behind that. If she had shown herself on base, she would’ve risked getting hunted or killed, or getting those around her injured if someone decided to use her friends and comrades as blackmail for her capture. If she had shown herself on the field, she would’ve risked sending her comrades into shock, making it difficult, if not impossible, for them to concentrate on the mission, running the risk of twice the number of soldiers dying. She has tried to find the right time to reveal her gift to us, but it’s been nearly impossible for her, something that was proven by the men of the Garrison out on the field when she finally did reveal herself, only to get shot and chased.”

“So you are saying that she was justified in letting the hundreds of lives she could’ve saved die? Because she couldn’t find the right timing?” The Military Police pig said incredulously, his every word like a punch to (Y/N)’s gut. “I was unaware the soldiers of the Survey Corps were so selfish, cared so little about their men in battle. If this doesn’t further bolster my claims, I don’t know what would.”

“That’s not what I said,” Erwin said, his voice cold. “I said-”

“And you brought up the men from the Garrison,” the MP cut off Erwin, smiling wider at the glares thrown his way. “I have actually brought them today as witnesses. They would like to say a few words, if that is alright?”

The Premier thought for moment before giving a slow nod.

As soon as the all clear was given, the MP motioned for two of the Garrison soldiers who had fought beside the Survey Corps that day to come forward. (Y/N) growled low in her throat at the sight of the men, especially the bigger of the two, the one that had shot her. She noticed Levi tense out of the corner of her eye, knowing he remembered just as well. She threw him a quick reassuring glance just as Hanji placed a hand on his shoulder, imploring him not to react. Levi managed to calm himself, crossing his arms over his chest, but she could tell it was taking every ounce of effort from him not to kill the man.

“Names?” The Premier asked.

“Louis Bordgenson.”

“Graham Pickett.” 

“Bordgenson, Pickett, could you please explain why you are here? Why do you believe (Y/N) (L/N) should be placed under Military Police custody?”

“We were two of the few to witness what happened when (L/N) saved Captain Levi from the titans, sir,” Graham said. “We are here to support the Military Police in their decision of taking (L/N) into their custody because we believe that what we saw on the field is a perfect example of the Survey Corps’ shortcomings as a branch. They need to be improved, restored with proper management and leadership. And it all starts with weeding out the soldiers that need to be corrected, allowing them to reevaluate their life choices in a place that won’t get others killed. Out on that field, we were attacked by all of the Survey Corps officers when I shot at (L/N) for my own defense, without even pausing for a moment to consider the situation. That woman attacked me, nearly knocked me right into a titan’s mouth with her wings, and flew off, leaving her comrades for dead, even as they still fought for her in the end.”

Louis nodded along with what Graham was saying before opening his mouth to add on. “Exactly. And when we got back from beyond the walls, we were arrested for attacking a Survey Corps officer. We were called lunatics, psychotics, for claiming to have seen a winged woman, and yet, here she is. We were right all along and none of the Survey Corps officers stepped forward to say it was wrong. To top it all off, when she came back, they sheltered her! Hid her with them and tried to pass everything off as normal.”

“From what I saw, (Y/N) (L/N) did not attack either of you,” Erwin said, cutting the two younger men off from continuing with their ranting diatribe. His tone was sharpened ice and his voice was filled with venom, waiting to strike like a snake in the shadows with barely suppressed fury. (Y/N) felt a conflicting wave of pride, gratitude, and apprehension wash through her. She loved Erwin, he was a close friend of hers, but that sometimes made her forget how god damn scary he could be when upset.

“You boys seem to have forgotten that you two were not the only ones on the field that day. From what everyone else saw, (Y/N) performed a great service to save a comrade, exposing herself in the most vulnerable way possible to try to help us escape. To help you, escape. She never singled you out, never tried to approach you in any manner other than one of friendly disposition. She did knock you over with the power of her wings as you mentioned, but she only did that because you were standing too close to her in your attempt to capture her for yourself. She was just trying to fly away peacefully, and would not have left us on that battlefield if you had not ordered your men to charge and fire. Your imprisonment was valid, and your accusations are dramatized and inaccurate.”

(Y/N) closed her eyes as Erwin’s last word rang out. Her stomach was churning and she felt lightheaded, her heart conflicted with so many differing emotions at once. She was grateful for Erwin and the Survey Corps, her friends who were fighting for her, fighting for her future, but she couldn’t help but feel as if she didn’t deserve them and their efforts. While she hated to admit it, the men from the Garrison weren’t wrong. She had spent years hiding her wings away, failing to save her comrades because of her fear, watching as they were devoured when the faster speed of her wings possibly could’ve saved them. Her head drooped a little as the men in front of her fought. Could she even call herself a soldier? A scout? Did she deserve to fight alongside them? Did she deserve… Levi?

She sucked in a shuddering breath, willing the tears to stay back. Maybe she did deserve to be nothing more than an animal to be viewed in a cage. Something to be gawked at and displayed like some kind of trophy. Could she even be considered human? She was so abnormal, so fucked up, mentally and physically. How could she possibly be considered safe enough to be around those she cared about?

Just as she was about to succumb to the notion of her worthlessness, a sharp, deep voice made her eyes snap open and glance to her left where her lover was standing steadfast beside his commander, his silver eyes burning like molten iron.

“Now listen here, all of the claims you have made so far have been either disproven or provided with solutions. (Y/N) has been nothing but the most amazing soldier, dutifully working to take care of everyone around her and constantly fighting for a better world. Just because you fuckwads can’t get your heads out of your asses long enough to see it, doesn’t mean it’s not true. (Y/N) was faced with an incredibly tough decision in her life, and she’s been forced to deal with it ever since she was born. She is just human. Simply, wonderfully, human, and there is nothing wrong with the choices she made,” Levi said, making (Y/N)’s eyes water with the love she felt for the raven-haired man.

“I know she will continue to be a necessary asset for the Survey Corps, where she can keep doing what she knows how to do best. If we lock her up in some manor to be cooed at by nobles, we will be lost. For god’s sake we have to deal with Jaeger every day and she’s significantly less of a threat than he is, but has twice the amount of usefulness to us.”

“Oh, as if that little experiment is going so well,” the MP said with a sneer. “The Survey Corps got custody of that one and look what’s happened? Cities destroyed, people lost. Captain Levi, your own squad got brutally murdered by an abnormal on an expedition because that titan shifter was too useless to do anything to help you. If we let you take custody of this one as well, we fear that the odds of humanity winning this war will shift further downwards. The fate of every human within these walls is in the hands of the Survey Corps soldiers. The last thing your branch needs is another distraction, or in better terms, a mistake.”

(Y/N) winced at the insult, her body flooding with icy fear as murmurs of agreement floated through the crowd. She knew she should’ve expected this possibility, had even reminded herself of the fact when Erwin left to tell the Premier about her existence earlier that week. She had known from the moment she had agreed to reveal herself publicly and use her gifts in battle to fight the titans and save her friends that this could happen. She could be turned against, experimented on, taken back to a cage and locked up, just as she had spent most of her early life. But even knowing about it didn’t stop the anger, the fear from filling her from head to toe, making her shift nervously on the wooden platform. She wanted to speak, wanted to say something to counteract what the Military Police were claiming, but she kept her mouth shut, knowing it was for the best. If she started talking now, fueled by her emotions, after spending the entire time staying quiet, it would look as if she was becoming desperate, trying to hide something. And with how hard Levi and Erwin were fighting for her, the last thing she wanted to do was ruin everything by opening her stupid mouth.

Levi and Erwin were about to retort when the Premier held up his hand, his eyes closed as he waited for the room to settle down again. The room quickly hushed. (Y/N) waited, her entire body tense as she stared up at the Premier, her heart thumping so loudly she was surprised he couldn’t hear it.

Everything will be fine.

“Based on the claims made by both parties, I have come to a decision on where the defendant shall be placed until further notice,” Zackley said.

I won’t let them take you away from me.

“While both parties have put forth compelling arguments, I can not determine whether or not bias or deceit is at play here on either side. It is because of this that I have decided to put you in the place that I believe would be the safest for humanity should things take a turn for the worst.”

No matter what, we are in this together, wings and all.

“(Y/N) (L/N), I am officially placing you under the custody of the Military Police, where you will be kept and cared for until I can find the proper evidence to prove your innocence.”

I love you.

(Y/N) felt her world shift. She heard Levi’s roar of fury, Erwin’s sharp voice ringing out into the hall as he tried to reason with the Premier, Hanji’s screech of shock and anger, but no words registered. The Military Police. Anything but the Military Police. She wanted to struggle against her binds, wanted to roar and scream and snap, wanted to stretch her wings and fly away, far away, just her and Levi together. But she couldn’t do that. She hung her head, unable to hold back the tidal wave of tears this time as they slid down her cheeks in clear rivers, running down her soft skin to splatter on the floor beneath her.

She could practically hear the smirk in the MP’s voice as he thanked the Premier and barked orders at his assembled soldiers to grab her. She wanted nothing more than to slap that smug grin off his face but she knew she couldn’t. She forced herself to take deep breaths as she felt hands rain down on her, touching her, dragging her, chaining her.

When she was finally unhooked from the steel post in the center of the room, the Military Police soldiers holding her tightly between them, dragging her towards the door, (Y/N) managed to look up. She caught Levi’s eye from where he was being held back by both Erwin and Hanji, the sorrow and desperation in those stunning gunmetal hues making her heart shatter. She didn’t know when she’d see him again, if she ever would see him again. And even if she was granted the opportunity to see him, she knew she wouldn’t be able to hold him, kiss him, love him like she always did.

Even though her heart was being ripped to shreds, (Y/N) managed a watery smile in his direction, her lips moving to mouth the words, “I will see you again, I promise,” to him. She saw him stand a little straighter, a glint in his eye as he took her words to heart. She just knew that he was going to do everything in his power to make that happen.

No matter what, we are in this together, wings and all.

(Y/N) kept her eyes on him as she was led back through the large wooden doors of the courtroom, refusing to look away from her lover until the doors had completely shut behind her, officially separating her from the love of her life.

[fandumbstuff]

The Star Wars Saga, ranked best to worst.

1. The Empire Strikes Back Directed by Irvin Kershner

Upon close consideration, I’ve come to the shocking conclusion that Empire is the best Star Wars film. There’s a wealth of world-building and character development here that in many ways makes Star Wars the living breathing universe it is now. A richly complex melodrama lies at the heart of Empire, giving a whole new meaning to the term “space opera”. The performances here are some of the strongest in the entire franchise. Mark Hamill not only fleshes out Luke’s character, but in his training with Yoda and his duel with Vader he establishes the profound nature of the force, and how every future character interacts with it. As Han and Leia, Harrison Ford and Carrie Fisher create authenticity to their characters’ relationship. Often misinterpreted as playfully hostile or sassy, there’s a real and endearing sense of affection between them, particularly in the infamous “I love you”/”I know” line- shedding their previously petty flirtation and affirming their true feelings. The emotional crux of Empire lies not in the most memorable twist, but in the moments immediately following it - In Luke and Leia reaching out to each other, reconnecting a relationship that was lost, rekindling hope in the force after we thought it was lost.

2. A New Hope  Directed by George Lucas

I’ll be the first in line to make fun of dorky George Lucas and his woeful attempts at writing dialogue or romance. However, it’s pretty damn impossible to ignore what he achieved with Star Wars in 1977. The sheer audacity of his vision and his determination in executing it despite the naysaying from producers and supposed friends. Lucas had the bold idea of using cinema for it’s absolute worth- more than just a storytelling medium but a theatrical one. A cacaphony of sight and sound that could draw mass audiences and create a lasting impression. It’s a formula that every Hollywood and Bollywood blockbuster strives and more often than not fails to follow. It’s hard to dissociate A New Hope from the cultural phenomenon it helped create, but when you do, it stands as an impressive film on it’s own. Groundbreaking in terms of it’s visual effects and nostalgic in the simplicity of it’s sci-fi serial story, Star Wars ticked all the right boxes for so many people. If I was to boil Star Wars down to an essence, i think it lies in 2 scenes: Luke looking out at the binary sunset on Tattooine, and Han Solo yahooing after the Falcon saves Luke in the Death Star trenches. Those two scenes, Wistfulness and Exuberance, are the two sides of one concept- Adventure. Star Wars ignited those emotions in every child’s imagination, and it’s a flame that’s likely to never go out. 

3. Rogue One: A Star Wars Story Directed by Gareth Evans

Hard to believe this is a Disney movie. While the house of mouse may have a reputation for emotional gut punches in kids movies, it’s never felt quite so... permanent. Rogue One is an unrelenting emotional journey barelling towards surefire tragedy. We spend moments with characters that seem to be carrying the weight of the world on their shoulders. The sense of desperation that permeates the movie almost overpowers any sense of heroism. It’s so unlike anything we’ve seen in a Star Wars movie. Their courage comes from a place that is wholly genuine and believable. We see the rebellion for the despondent group that they are. Sorely outnumbered by the Empire, their actions in this movie show a reckless, darker side to them and makes the morality of Star Wars so much more complex. The first time we meet Cassian Andor- the stand out performace of the film by Diego Luna- we see him kill another rebel to protect their secrets. It’s a movie that reframes the original Star Wars trilogy, making it a richer, complex universe and more intriguing as a result. Also, the last five minutes might be the best five minutes in any Star Wars movie.

4. Return of the Jedi Directed by Richard Marquand

The one sore spot in the original trilogy for me are the Ewoks. I realise it's ridiculous for me to complain about kid-friendly creatures in a kid's movie, but Star Wars has done this a lot more tolerably in the form of Porgs and Baby Yoda. Just something about these furry, Tibetan speaking monsters who somehow have the wherewithal to defeat an elite and well equipped empire rubs me the long way. Anyway, other than that, the movie's pretty fantastic. The culmination of Luke's journey comes to a head in an extremely emotional and effective climax. John Williams score crescendos to operatic heights and Mark Hamill's stellar performance sells Luke’s torment. It’s also worth noting that in those final moments of moral dilemma, Darth Vader is silent- it’s David Prowse’s performance entirely that sells this. His incredible presence throughout the trilogy builds to this moment and you can feel the weight of it in those closeups on Vader. Every other cast member rounds the story out perfectly- from Lando and Han’s playful rapport to Leia’s more militaristic side in planning the rebellions final moves. I still bemoan the fact that they changed the final song- an opinion that I’m apparently a minority on- but it’s a pretty incredible ending altogether and wonderfully cathartic to watch over and over again.

5. The Last Jedi Directed by Rian Johnson

With Last Jedi, Rian Johnson analyzed the universe Star Wars inhabits, and what drives it’s characters. The characters that we love are pushed to their limits, struggle against insurmountable odds and their own innate flaws. And we see all of them fail in turn. It is remarkably bleak, but not without purpose. It is out of this failure that the Resistance needs to recoup and come back stronger. The performances here, are arguably the best you’ll find in the entire franchise. Daisy Ridley has to break down Rey’s naivete and find a deeper sense of self actualization. Adam Driver hands in some of his best work, by swerving the audience into believing Kylo Ren and then creating a desperate plea in THAT throne room scene, and eventually turning him into a snivelling villain, all in the same movie. Mark Hamill’s performance here is heartbreaking- revealing the bleakest version of Luke, and struggling to find his redemption. Last Jedi is a bold deconstuction of these characters, of what they stand for, and what makes Star Wars beautiful.

6. The Force Awakens Directed by J. J. Abrams

In many ways, a safe movie to announce the return of Star Wars. But it’s hard to fault this. Disney’s decision making was shrewd here, bringing on J. J. Abrams to pay homage to George Lucas’ original vision, returning the franchise to it’s roots of practical effects and shooting on film. There was something truly special about experiencing this film in theatres, so much so that I did it eleven times. It captured a sense of wonder for fans new and old- hearing the scream of Tie Fighters, John Williams herald the return of the Millenium Falcon, and the look of awe on Rey’s face as she clutches her destiny in her hand. I’ll be honest, the film loses some of this magic without the shared experience of an audience, and it’s flaws are more noticeable. But being swept up in the excitement of adventure felt so darn good in 2015, and that’s so key to this franchise.

7. Revenge of the Sith Directed by George Lucas

This movie has risen so much in my opinion, entirely due to the animated Clone Wars series. Revenge of the Sith depicts the overwhelming tragedy that frames the original Star Wars. Watching Clone Wars explains explicitly what makes this film so tragic. But it’s more than that- it’s a catastrophic failure on behalf of the Jedi Order. Ignorance and pride allow evil to fester and grow. George Lucas took the simplicity of the moral struggle he established in 1977 and tried to give it depth and complexity with the prequels, and it pays off in Revenge of the Sith. It leads into the original trilogy quite brilliantly, with a promise of hope and resilience.

8. The Phantom Menace Directed by George Lucas

It has not aged well. While the advent of CGI I’m sure felt exciting at the time, and you almost can’t fault George Lucas for his insistence on staying at the forefront of VFX innovation as he has always done, it’s his reliance on so much of it that fails horribly. Like a kid in a candy store, Lucas stuffs the pockets of this film with so many bizarre effects for absolutely no reason. That sea monster scene is one of the worst displays I’ve ever seen and it’s absurd that it sits in a Star Wars film. Add to that the boring political plotline and ridiculous midichlorian dilemma and there’s very little redemptive about this film. However, it does have podracing, and Duel of the Fates, and it’s remarkable how much that salves the wound.

9. The Rise of Skywalker Directed by J. J. Abrams

Alright, well obviously this film has been problematic. However, I’m not about to bemoan the idea that Disney has ruined Star Wars and I have nothing left to live for. So let’s all just calm down. Ultimately J. J. Abrams was faced with the impossible task of wrapping up the Skywalker saga, with very few Skywalkers to work with. I firmly believe this would have been a very different film if Carrie Fisher was around to complete her performance. But left with nothing but the new cast, Abrams is caught between summing up the past while also looking to the future. It forces an awkward plotline with Palpatine- despite Ian McDiarmid's solid performance, the writing here seems wildly derivative of the franchise. There are some truly beautiful scenes, most notably the chemistry that Adam Driver gets to share with Harrison Ford, and Joonas Suotamo’s critically emotional outburst as Chewbacca. Some of the production design and score is so entirely different from the rest of the franchise it's inherently intriguing. But there’s very little here to save some of the poorer choices the film makes: the open plot hole with Finn, the derailing of Rey’s character development, and most crucially, the deeply perturbing culmination of Rey and Kylo’s relationship. The audience literally went “ew”.

10. Solo: A Star Wars Story Directed by Ron Howard

The biggest problem with Solo is that it operates under the presumption that people will be enamoured and invested in it. Not just in one movie, but in an entire series of movies. Solo clearly operates as a setup for further sequels. As a result, many plot lines remain unresolved, and Qi’ra winds up being a completely under-baked character. Her motivations make no sense, and a twist ending that I assume was supposed to be exciting is instead downright confusing. There’s a lot of unnecessary exposition into Han’s past too. As an origin story, I don’t need to know every aspect of Han’s past- especially not cute winks at inane things like “Why’s he called Solo?”. All this being said, The movie features some solid performances- Donald Glover is expectedly phenomenal as Lando, and Alden Ehrenreich excels as Solo, adding some welcome flavour to the character- particularly his friendship with Chewbacca, and a brilliantly executed final scene between him and Woody Harrelson’s Beckett.

11. Attack of the Clones Directed by George Lucas

How in the world this film made it all the way to production and into filming, with no one pulling Lucas aside and saying “Hey George, those kids have no chemistry” is beyond me. And I’m not going to blame Hayden Christensen or Natalie Portman on this one, because the whole damn love story makes no sense. Maybe falling for a dude who admits he murdered women and children isn’t such a great idea? Then there’s the increasingly convoluted political climate set up in Phantom Menace, and the machinations of the dark side that would take the entire Clone Wars series to fully explain. All this being said, Temuera Morrison, Samuel L. Jackson, Ewan MacGregor AND Christopher Lee are all in this movie. And they’re pretty damn fantastic.

12. The Clone Wars Directed by Dave Filoni

It’s inexplicable that Dave Filoni would go on to have a hand in some of the best Star Wars content ever made in Clone Wars, Rebels and the Mandalorian. And yet he got his start in the franchise by putting up this piece of junk. And junk is being a little generous. The humour is so juvenile it’s insulting to even the youngest of audiences it’s intended for. The plotline feels way to thin to warrant a feature film, and if this was in fact intended as a pilot for the TV series, they sure picked to most uninteresting story to pique our interest. Skip the movie, watch the show. 

[benedictsvestcollection]

Ever Ever After- A Whiskey x reader Modern Cinderella fic

Rating: T for some swearing mostly!

Warnings: Ummmm.... Mentions of death, fluff, sweetness and stepmom being a bitch. 

Word count: 2.3K

A/N: Tomorrow is @absurdthirst‘s birthday so this chapter is dedicated to you my darling! Happy early birthday!

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

As soon as Jack and Ginger were in the back of the towncar and away from prying eyes, Jack heaved a heavy sigh. “I do not like that woman.” He growled as Ginger began typing away an email to Champ. 

He hadn’t stopped thinking about the way Miranda had spoken to you, her own step-daughter. The entire day, he had witnessed you being treated with such disdain and rudeness. 

“Your dentist is going to hate you when they find out you’ve been grinding your teeth so much today.” Ginger teased him, spying the way Jack clenched his jaw so much. Mad on your behalf. A woman, he barely knew but already felt innately protective of. 

“Who the hell talks to their family like that?” He asked her. “She was nothing but sweet and hardworking all day and they just… Spoke to her like that.” 

“Terrible people. They’re terrible people Jack.” Ginger told him simply, knowing he had asked a rhetorical question. But answering him nonetheless. 

Jack sighed, knowing she was right. “Do we have anything on the daughters?” He asked her, changing the subject. 

Ginger shook her head. “As far as I can tell, they’re just spoiled bitches.” She muttered. “But not aware of what their mom is up to.” 

“Like mother, like daughters.” Jack muttered out with a huff. 

“You like her.” Ginger stated matter of factly. “And not just in a ‘what a sweet girl’, or ‘she’s part of the mission’ kind of way.” She teased him. 

He merely grunted in response and shifted in his seat, readjusting his suit jacket. Glaring at Ginger while she smirked from her phone. She was right and he hated that she was. 

“I like her too. Just maybe not in the same way you do.” She continued on, smirk still on her face.

“You done Ging?” He muttered at her grumpily. “We have work to do.” 

~~~~~~~~~

You sighed in contentment inhaling your french toast, bacon, eggs and coffee at your favorite diner. You had cleverly booked your stepmother and sisters for a spa weekend. But in reality, it had been for you. A peaceful weekend to yourself with no work to do. So now, you were treating yourself to brunch at your favorite New York diner. 

“Well, well, well… Isn’t this a welcome sight for sore eyes.” Came a southern drawl over you. Warm like bourbon and comforting like a worn in fall sweater. 

You looked up to see warm brown eyes and a mustache smirk looking down at you in your booth. 

“Oh… Hello Mr. Daniels.” You stammered out at him, suddenly even more relieved that your stepmom and sisters weren’t around, let alone didn’t hang out in your area or they’d accuse you of ruining things by simply talking to him. 

“Oh please darlin’. Call me Jack. Mr. Daniels makes me feel old.” He grinned at you and slid into the booth across from you and ordered a coffee.

“I um… This doesn’t seem like the kind of place you would come to.” You told him nervously. 

“Why? Because I’m the CEO of a distillery?” He teased you. “Darlin’ I was born in Kentucky and went to school in Texas. I’m a cowboy through and through. A diner don’t scare me.” 

You blushed. Why was he here? If word got back to your stepmom and sisters… You didn’t want to think about what they’d do. 

“I need to go.” 

Jack’s hand flashed out and gently took yours. “You have to work on a weekend?” He asked you worried, almost. Like he somehow knew that you worked too much or something. 

“No actually, I just… I don’t get weekends usually so I have stuff I wanted to get done is all.” You shrugged. It wasn’t a total lie, you did have things you wanted to do. Laundry, cleaning your apartment and grocery shopping. But mostly, you were afraid you were going to get caught with Jack Daniels and you didn’t need that drama in your life. You had enough with your family. 

Jack nodded at you. “I understand, can I at least walk you home?” He asked you as he stood with you.

“I-” You were cut off by your phone vibrating in your jeans pocket. “Son of a bitch… Sorry.” You muttered at him as you scowled at the screen. Seeing your stepmother’s name demanding you answer. 

“Yes?” You sighed as you reluctantly answered the phone. Trying to ignore the way Jack was staring at and studying you intently. 

“I need you to go upstate and buy pumpkins.” She responded on the other end of the phone. 

“Pumpkins? Why?” You asked her with a huff.

“Because it’s fall and I want the offices decorated.” You could practically hear her rolling her eyes at what she thought was a stupid question.

“Okay…” You sighed at her once more. “How many do you want me to get?” You asked her. 

“Fifty. I want the office completely decorated for the season.” She told you. “Oh also, maybe get some hay bales too.” 

“Fifty?!” You asked her, jaw dropping in shock. Where in the hell were you supposed to put them? Being New York, you didn’t even have a car. 

“Stop repeating everything I say and just get there and do it.” She snapped and hung up on you.

“Yes ma’am.” You muttered at your phone sarcastically and then tossed it into your purse aggressively. “Well now I do have to work Mr. Daniels.” You grumbled. 

“Kind of difficult to not overhear that conversation.” He admitted softly, almost like he felt sorry for you. “You okay?” He asked you gently. 

“Yeah, I’m great. I have to give up my Saturday, somehow get upstate. Buy fifty pumpkins in various sizes and some bales of hay and get them all back to the office.” You muttered. “Guess I’m renting a car for the day.” 

“Well, she’ll pay for that won’t she?” He asked you, deep down already knowing the answer but wanting to hear you confirm it. 

You snorted. “Yeah right. I practically run the company and I’m living in a shitty studio apartment.” 

Jack frowned at that. “Well then darlin’. I wouldn’t be a southern gentleman if I didn’t offer to help you. I’ve got my Bronco out front and the day off.” He rumbled in your ear. “And don’t you worry, they won’t find out you were helped.” He promised you as he led you outside to his truck. 

“Mr. Daniels I can’t… Ask you to do that.” You insisted as you chewed your bottom lip anxiously. 

“You didn’t ask. I offered. And please… Call me Jack.” He reminded you as he opened the passenger door for you. “Please, I want to help.” 

Honestly, the idea of spending any kind of time with this handsome and charming man was appealing. Plus, you really didn’t feel like spending any of your hard earned money on a rental for a day when you had a truck being offered to you. 

“Okay. Thank you… Jack.” You finally relented with a small, shy smile at him as you climbed up into the passenger seat of his truck. 

He released his gentle hold on your elbow and smiled at you. “You’re welcome darlin’.” He smiled at you as he moved to the driver’s side and started it up.

An hour later, Jack parked his truck in the gravel parking lot. 

“Damn, pumpkin patches sure have changed since I was a kid.” You muttered, taking in the expanse of acreage. An actual pumpkin patch, gift shop, a moonbounce, pony rides and a hay ride. 

Jack let out a whistle and casually tossed his arm over your shoulder. “You said it darlin’.” He agreed and led you to the patch. 

“Haven’t done this since I was a kid with my dad.” You murmured wistfully. 

Jack paused for a split second when you said that. “I’m so sorry.” He rubbed your arm gently. 

You shrugged. “It’s okay.” 

“How uh… How did he die?” He asked gently. 

You wiped a tear from your eye. “Got sick suddenly. Doctor’s couldn’t really explain it. First they thought it was the flu because I got sick too. But he uh… Didn’t make it.” 

“You both got the flu at the same time?” He asked you, brows furrowed in thought. 

“Wasn’t the flu. The only explanation the doctors had was food poisoning.” You mumbled as you both began wandering the patch together. 

“But he… Didn’t make it.” He finished the thought you were internalizing. 

“And I did.” You mused bitterly. 

“Hey now… I won’t have you thinkin’ that way. It ain’t your fault that you both got sick and you didn’t die. I, for one am glad you’re here.” 

Tears were falling down your cheeks now. “He was my best friend and now he’s just… Gone.” 

Quickly, Jack pulled you over to a set of hay bales and faced you. “Loss is never easy to deal with darlin’. But you don’t have to grieve alone.” He reassured you, thumbs gently rubbing the inside of your wrists. 

“You’ve met my stepmom and sisters… Right?” You asked him with a garbled laugh. 

“Look at you, makin’ jokes.” He grinned at you before he instinctively leaned forward to kiss your temple. 

You froze at the sweet gesture, surrounded by his overwhelming scent before you gave in and sank into his arms. For the first time in over a year, you felt safe with someone. Actually cared for. “Thank you… Jack.” You mumbled into his chest.

“Anytime darlin’.” He promised you. “Now… I do believe that we have pumpkins and hay bales to blow on, your stepmother’s money.” He teased you. 

You laughed again and nodded at him. “Yeah… Okay.” 

“Now, you dry your eyes. I’ll go get a wagon for all these pumpkins we have to buy.” 

You nodded and started to browse the pumpkins as Jack went to get a wagon to tote around. 

“Ginger, I need you to look into the medical records or her and her father. Somethin’s off here.” Jack said over the phone. 

“It is awfully convenient that they both got sick and in the hospital. While the father died.” She admitted on the other end of the phone. 

“Not to mention that the stepmom took control of the empire after he died and she was deathly ill in the hospital.” He growled out. 

“Easy there cowboy. Now that we’re here we’ll make sure this doesn’t happen again.” Ginger soothed him. “Now go back to your pumpkin date. I’ll look into this.” 

“Sorry about that darlin’. Was just informin’ Ginger that I wouldn’t be available the rest of the day.” He told you with a smile. 

“It’s okay.” You told him with a shy smile and placed two pumpkins in the wagon. 

The rest of the day proceeded with Jack dutifully toting the wagon around for you. Emptying it into his truck as it got full and they were paid. You bought hay bales, a scarecrow for the reception area and a bushel of apples. 

“You sure do love fall darlin’.” He teased you as you hopped into his truck and sighed. 

“I just... Figured since I was here, the apples are for baking and a couple of pumpkins for my place.” You blushed and shrugged.

It was after nine by the time Jack finally pulled back in front of your building. They had dropped off most of the supplies at the office. 

“Let me help you get this upstairs.” He insisted. “Otherwise you’re going to have to make two trips with this basket of apples and both your pumpkins.” 

“Jack I-” You started, not wanting him to do more for you than he already had. 

“Please… There’s somethin’ I feel like I need to tell you.” He explained to you gently. “Preferably upstairs and not on a New York street.” 

“Tell me… What?” You asked him anxiously. 

“It’s alright. Let’s just get upstairs.” He soothed you.

Nervously, you led the way into your small apartment and set your pumpkins down on your kitchen counter. “What… Uh… What’s going on?” You asked him.

Jack set the basket of apples down next to your pumpkins and placed his hand on your back. “Let’s sit down.” He suggested. 

“Jack I… What’s wrong?” You asked him, hands twisting together anxiously. 

“I’m not exactly the CEO of the Statesman distillery.” He told you simply, staring at you. 

“You’re… What?” You asked him, face scrunched up in confusion.

“Statesman is an independent intelligence agency and I work for them.” He explained to you. “I’m a spy.” 

“You’re a what?” You repeated to him. 

“I know this is difficult to absorb.” He explained to you. “I’m investigatin’ your stepmom’s dealin’ with the company.” 

“Oh so… You were spending time with me for a… Mission?” You asked him. 

“It started off like that, but… You’re very sweet and I’m lookin’ out for you.” He explained. “I’m tryin’ to help you. But I need your help too, if you’re willin’ to help me.” 

“Help you how?” You asked softly.

Jack moved closer to you. “I need someone inside the company, and you’re perfect.” 

You knew he meant for helping him but, him calling you perfect made you blush. “Perfect how?”

“Look, I don’t wanna pressure you into doin’ somethin’ without you thinkin’ or sleepin’ on it.” He explained softly, as he rubbed your wrists softly. “Why don’t you sleep on it and you call me tomorrow.” 

“Yeah, that might be best. I uh… Don’t want my family to find out about this.” You explained nervously. 

“I completely understand darlin’. You think on it, and let me know. Alright? No pressure, I promise.” 

You practically melted as he ran his knuckles gently along your cheekbone. You nodded at him and smiled shyly at him. “Okay.”

“Good night darlin’.” He murmured in your ear. 

“Good night Jack.” You returned as he finally departed your apartment and you considered his news and offer to you.

Tag list:

@absurdthirst, @spacegayofficial, @lilangeldevil006, @manda-but-not-lorian, @emmymarierivia, @din-djarin-protection-squad, @nope-itsnopi, @gothgirl1362-blog, @deafspaceperson, @auty-ren, @luminescentlily, @ahopelessromanticwritersworld, @babe-dont, @dreamgirl-6781-blog, @katialvi, @zoe-rachel-crisp, @cryptkeepersoul, @jaa1682-27, @katheriner1999, @promiscuoussatan, @paintballkid711, @marvelranger, @owljumper, @girlwithanewplan, @iellarenuodolorian, @lost-girl-inc, @f0rever15elf, @mrschiltoncat, @hillarymurray4, @seejayyou 

Sorry some of my tags aren’t fully working! XOXO

[dustofbrokenheart]

The Lost Boys: Día de los Muertos

GIF not mine! 

Dwayne x Reader 

Word Count: 2,810

Summary: Now that Halloween is over, it’s time for Day of the Dead. Dwayne celebrates with the reader and their family. In honor of the brown, mostly likely Latinx, people of Santa Carla as shown in the opening title sequence. 

It was a cool California night, the air carrying just a hint of ocean salt.

You had split from the other boys earlier to enjoy some time alone together, something that could be hard to come by given how close the four of them were. Once the two of you had slipped away, Dwayne brought you to a section of the beach that had trees, an area where soil converted to, and mixed with, sand.

Gracefully scaling the tree, Dwayne bent down, extending his hands so you he could pull you up. He settled back against the tree trunk and seated you in his lap, facing him with his hands resting on your bottom.

At this point in the fall there weren’t many beach goers who came out after dark. The temperatures were too cold for the locals and the tourist season was winding down.

Dwayne and you were the type to not mind sitting together in comfortable silence. You were a little drowsy this late into the night so you snuggled into his chest and rested your eyes for a bit. You could feel Dwayne stroking your hair which turned your muscles to liquid. The moment was so peaceful, it was hard to tell whether twenty minutes or twenty hours had passed.

“Love you,” he murmured quietly.

Those three words had you suddenly wide awake and you pressed a soft kiss to his jaw.

“I love you, too.”

You couldn’t stop the big smile from lighting up your face. It’s not that you didn’t know that he loved you; after all, you two had been a long-term item. He showed it every day through his gentle touches and supportive actions. It’s just that he didn’t often convey it with words. When he did it made you extra giddy.

And on that particular night, it gave you the courage to bring up something you had been meaning to ask him. “Hey Dwayne?”

“Yeah?”

You scooted backwards so you could talk to him properly. “Do you want to do Día de los Muertos with me this year? I mean, don’t feel obligated. The whole family will be there, and it’s right after Halloween but—”

He silenced your rambling with a kiss. “Of course. Besides, I love your parent. Your brother on the other hand…”

You wrapped him in your arms and squeezed tight.

“Don’t worry,” you grinned. “I’ll protect you.”

Dwayne snorted. As an immortal creature of the night, he could handle himself just fine. In fact, you were the one the needed protecting more often than not seeing as how you were the fleshy, fragile human.

So he was more than capable of physically handling your brother. It’s just that your brother was really hard on anyone who dated any of his younger siblings and he had had his fair share of arguments with your boyfriend. In his eyes no one was good enough for any of you. But you doubted that he’d be stupid enough to start something during a holiday celebration lest he risk facing your mom’s wrath.

Dwayne planned to meet you and the family at the graveyard off of 2nd Street first to help with the duties there before continuing the festivities at the house.

Speaking of home, you must have fell asleep because the next thing you knew, Dwayne was silently creeping up the stairs to take you to your bedroom. He tucked you in and the last thing you remembered in your mostly unconscious state was him kissing you goodnight. Then he disappeared and you drifted off to sleep

 _______________

Dwayne rolled into the cemetery a little before nine o’clock, like you guys had agreed, looking a little more modest for the occasion. Well, modest for him. His dark hair was still loose and wild, his ivory earring present. Black Chuck Taylors covered his feet and his jeans were ripped at the knees. But he was wearing a clean white shirt and he had switched his normal jaguar jacket for a solid leather one.

“Mijo!” your mom cried when she saw him. She enveloped him in a tight hug and the size difference between the two of them was as comical as it always was. Parting with a couple hard pats against his back, she yelled at everyone to come say hello to your boyfriend.

Dwayne knew your dad and siblings and was introduced to the extended family as they lined up to greet him. Your mom acted as the middle person.

“This is my mother… these are my sisters and their families… my brother, his wife, and their kids… my uncle and his daughter, my cousin and his wife…”

Dwayne shook all of the hands and accepted their hugs like a champ. At this point in the relationship he was no longer awkward with all the hugging, but he was good at remembering names which had always impressed your family given how many of you there were.

Finally, you interjected on his behalf so you could have time with him. You shooed them way and they went back to their assigned jobs.

“Y/N,” your mom directed. “Show Dwayne what to do.”

“Guess that means you’re stuck with me,” you joked.

“Perfect,” he said draping his arm around your shoulders.

You took him to the two graves that you were in charge of. All the graves that belonged to your family were split up and assigned to the living members. Your mom’s side had been in Santa Carla for four generations, meaning there were plenty of graves to clean up.

Your dad was the first in his family to live in Satna Carla so there wasn’t any work to do for that side.

You had been given your great-grandparents on that Día de los Muertos, so that’s where you and Dwayne headed. Luckily, those graves were a little further apart from the others which gave you more privacy with him.

You explained to him every year your family descended upon the graveyard to pay respect and spruce up the family graves.

“Not that the groundskeepers don’t do a good job, but it’s tradition that we clean up their graves on Day of the Dead to show that we still care for them.

Dwayne took the rake to remove some of the dead foliage and you wiped down the headstones with a rag and bucket. The water turned a murky brown color when you rung the rag out, which wasn’t pleasant, but you were satisfied that the grime was coming out.

You finished by placing a bouquet in front of both graves, barely-there-wisps of smoke from small candles curling upwards into the night air.

“How come we’re not doing the alters here at the cemetery?” Dwayne asked.

You looked at him, surprised that he caught that.

“I’ve seen it done before, you know. Just never done it myself is all,” he said defensively.

“Careful. Your inner old man is peaking out,” you teased.

He suddenly tackled you to the ground, extremely careful not to injure you or disturb anything in the vicinity. You were very aware of the way his toned body pressed into yours. He raised one of his eyebrows. Definitely not an old man, you gulped.

“Um, the alter thing. We call them ofrendas. We stopped doing it out here a while back because people complained.”

He looked at you, asking you without words to elaborate.

“The fact that a bunch of Latinos were hanging out in a cemetery, after dark, to essentially throw a party rubbed other people in town the wrong way.”

You rolled your head to the side to glance at the other tombstones from your position under Dwayne. “Now we just come here to clean up.  The fun stuff still happens though, we just do it at the house instead.”

“Bigots,” he grumbled. “I can take care of anyone who complains, you know? It’ll be a win-win for you and for me.”

He sat up and pulled you with so that you were upright too. You laughed at his proposal knowing that his proposal was entirely serious. Dwayne was such a protective boy.

“Thanks, amor, but that would require killing more people than you think. I promise we’re doing just fine this way.”

He huffed but let it go. You both looked at the graves you had finished with, satisfied that you had done a good job. The ancestors should be pleased.

“Come on,” you prompted, “Let’s go see if anyone else needs help.”

The efforts of the gathered small army, aka the family, meant that the work was finished quickly and it was soon time to take the party elsewhere. You told your parents that you were riding with Dwayne, which your brother overheard and didn’t like.

Dwayne gave him his most intimidating stare and you prepared to go on the defensive, but he didn’t get in one whole sentence before your mom there, slapping the back of his head. “Ay mijo,” she chastised.

She gave you a quick blessing and sent you on your way. You stuck your tongue out at your brother for good measure then climbed onto Dwayne’s bike. He patted your thigh twice in quick succession before squealing off a little louder than normal and you knew exactly who that was for.

Dwayne was an excellent driver and you were perfectly safe with him, however, that didn’t mean he drove slowly. He easily beat back everyone else in your family. You decided to start getting thing ready, knowing that you would be judged for sitting around when there was stuff to be do.

The pan was already done, having been baked earlier that day so you only had to arrange them on a platter. Dwayne helped fill coolers with ice and then added beer and pop. That’s all that there was time to do before the others started trickling in, which you took as your cue to hand the reigns over to the more qualified adults.

Excited to show Dwayne the ofrenda set-up in the living room, you noticed that he wasn’t in the kitchen where you left him. After a short search, you found him in the backyard sipping beer with your dad and some of the tíos.

You tried your best to sneak up on him, tickling him on his sides. You pouted when he wasn’t even phased and merely placed his hands on top of yours. His vampire scenes tended to see your surprises coming from a mile away, but still you never gave up trying.

“Come on, let’s go look at the ofrenda.”

Slipping back inside the house, one of your tías immediately pushed food into Dwayne’s hands as he passed by. He accepted it with the same politeness that had won your parents over when you first started dating. He took a small bite while you led him to the living room and hummed in delight.

“This is good.”

The ofrenda was impossible to miss once you entered the room. A large table covered in a yellow table cloth was set up against a wall, a large assortment of marigold blooms, candles, food, and other decorations spread out all around. In the middle, wooden racks where stacked up on one another and contained framed photographs of deceased family members.

Directly behind the table hung colorful paper cutouts, or papel picados, on cords which were tapped on the wall. Near by wall shelves were also filled with candles and some painted skulls.

“I see beer,” Dwayne said, pointing to the unopened glass bottles that were present in the display.

“You would point out that part.”

Bringing him closer to the ofrenda, you explained what was what. “The beer and the food are for the dead to enjoy since their spirits are here with us tonight.”

Dwayne nodded, intrigued. “This kind of marigold is called cempasúchil. It’s a traditional flower we use for Día de Muertos because it’s bright and will attract spirits. The candles and skulls are also common.”

One of the skulls in particular caught his attention and he carefully picked it up and turned it over in his hand. He smiled. “You painted this one.”

Your face felt like it was burning. That was your skull.

“I can tell,” he continued. “The yellow polka dots and purple flowers gave you away.”

Those were indeed your go-to designs and colors when drawing. And even though his keen observation skills shouldn’t surprise you anymore, you were still amazed at how he picked yours out without hesitation.

Clearing your throat to get yourself back on track, you point to a grainy black and white photo. “These are my maternal great-grandparents sitting with some of their kids. They’re the ones whose grave we did.”

“Actually, I think I knew them.”

Your mouth dropped. It was only after a minute that his lip started to twitch and you figured out he was playing with you. His ability to hold a straight face was maddening at times.

“Just because I’m old, doesn’t mean I know everyone from here,” he reminded you.

“Point taken. But you really did meet my grandpa back in the day.”

When Dwayne had first been invited to family dinner back when you had first started dating, it was hard for him not to look at all of the family pictures hanging on the walls. Later on, when you were outside hugging him good-bye he dropped that bomb on you.

He had noticed a picture of your grandpa and recognized him because he had worked on Dwayne’s motorcycle twice during the 1920s. You were incredulous. Your grandpa had recently died so it was surreal to hear that your boyfriend had not only met him, but met him before you were born.

Dwayne doubted your grandpa would have identified him had he still been alive since their interaction had been so brief.

Dwayne only remembered him because he was one of the few mechanics that took appointments after dark and he was pretty accepting, something that hadn’t always been true for the tan vampire at all points in the past.

Certain periods were worse than others, so when he did open up and speak about his memories you tried to be empathetic.

“I’m glad he was good to you,” you said in the present. You squeezed his hand and he squeezed back.

You went through the other relatives, introducing them to Dwayne photo by photo, sharing stories about them that had been shared with your over the years. He held you in his arms, content to listen to everything you were telling him.

Eventually you wandered to the couch to sit down. Everything was so lively and joyful.

Other conversations carried on around you as your family laughed and reminisced. An aging radio that sat in the kitchen played tunes in Spanish, unseen but heard. The younger kids would periodically run by, shouting and chasing each other.

Time passed quickly as it tended to do during parties and soon enough Dwayne was trying to leave as the festivities wound down. Trying being the operative word. He had been held up at the front door for nearly fifteen minutes while still there everyone said their good-byes.

“Here you go, Dwayne.” Your mom shoved a bag into his arms that was filled with several containers of tamales, rice, and sweets. “Give some to your friends, too. Boys need a lot of food and you all looked skinny when I saw them last time.”

He face betrayed nothing but there was a shine in his eyes that let you know he found the familiar ‘food’ spiel entertaining.

“Alright, I’m walking him to his bike,” you said with finality. You slammed the door shut, cutting off the voices behind you. “Sorry about them.”

“I’ve told you many times that I like them. Don’t be embarrassed. They remind me of… my family.”

He didn’t have to specify which family he meant. You could tell that he was referring to his human one. As rare as talking about past memories was, talking about memories of his family was even more rare.

“So, don’t apologize for them. Please.”

He opened his arms and you walked into them. He placed his hand on the back of your head and, trying to be sneaky about it, you put your hand into one his jacket pockets. You weren’t sure if he honestly didn’t feel it, or if he was letting you have your moment, but he didn’t stop you.

When he arrived back at the cave after leaving you with sweet parting kisses, he remained seated on his bike and pulled out your gift. A small black skull and some marigold blooms. He unfolded the note and read it to himself.

For the ones you’ve lost.

He turned the skull painted with red and yellow designs over in his hands and smiled.

_______________

Thanks for checking this out. I hope it was a good read! I also realized I may have outed myself by calling it pop instead of soda, but oh well.

[cheri-translates]

[CN] Idle Chat with Kiro

🍒 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for a feature which has not been released in English servers! 🍒

The CN server was recently graced with a new feature called 随便聊聊 (“Idle Chat”), where you can select a mood and talk to the love interests about work, life, and studies :>

Idle Chat with: Gavin / Lucien / Shaw / Victor

[ WORK - Topic 1: Overtime ]

1. Mood: Happy

MC: We can visit that dessert shop today! Because I. Don’t! Have! To! Work! Overtime!

Kiro: Although we’re separated by the screen, I can sense Miss Chip’s happiness~

Kiro: Since this is the case, our challenge today will be to--

Kiro: Wipe! The! Dessert! Shop! Clean!

-

2. Mood: Upset

MC: Went to work feeling muddle-headed today, which left me with a stack of incomplete work. Sigh, I might have to work overtime today.

Kiro: Did you spend too much time watching dramas last night?

Kiro: Next time, you have to stick to a regular sleeping timing.

Kiro: Also, isn’t the male lead by your side?

-

3. Mood: Angry

MC: The market hasn’t been good lately, so the income I received has also gone down. I feel like I’ve left everyone down...

Kiro: Back then, MC went through such difficult times.

Kiro: I think these little twists and turns don’t account for much!

Kiro: Because you’re always producing miracles!

-

[ WORK - Topic 2: Income ]

1. Mood: Happy

MC: I’ve received my pay~ I even have a bonus this month! Aren’t I incredible?

Kiro: As expected of Miss Chips!

Kiro: As a reward, I’ll give you a present.

Kiro: Want to know what it is?

-

2. Mood: Upset

MC: I have no idea why, but I haven’t been interested in anything I do. Could it be because it’s a long time till payday?

Kiro: Mm... want to consider changing occupations and becoming my assistant?

Kiro: You’ll be paid daily.

Kiro: Also, there will be an additional, exclusive Kiro hug every day.

-

3. Mood: Angry

MC: Working overtime again and again and again and again! There’s even a rainstorm outside! The most enraging thing is that I didn’t bring an umbrella!

Kiro: I checked the weather forecast beforehand

Kiro: So I knew there’d be a rainstorm

Kiro: Give me five minutes - I’ll be there soon!

-

[ WORK - Topic 3: Program Progress ]

1. Mood: Happy

MC: Do you still remember the collaborative program I mentioned before? We plan to invite a mystery guest. Want to guess who he is?

Kiro: I’m guessing he is -- Kiro!

Kiro: If Miss Chips doesn’t invite me,

Kiro: I’ll be very hurt.

-

2. Mood: Upset

MC: The reaction from the other party regarding this collaborative program seems bland. Actually, I also find the content a little boring. I have no inspiration at all...

Kiro: In my eyes, everything Miss Chips does is very interesting.

Kiro: But if you really have no inspiration,

Kiro: Need me to help you grab it back?

-

3. Mood: Angry

MC: I’ve already made over thirty amendments to the proposal for this collaborative program. What more does the other party want?! What do they mean by a “vibrant black”??

Kiro: Oo... a vibrant black...

Kiro: It does sound like a difficult operation.

Kiro: Maybe it’s the same thing as how Apple Box’s jet-black eyes are bright even at night?

-

[ WORK - Topic 4: Program Results ]

1. Mood: Happy

MC: The program I’ve been working on for months has finally gotten approved! If I were to continue doing it, I’d probably have gone bald... Should I place an order for hair-growth shampoo?

Kiro: Instead of hair-growth shampoo, I think what you need more is sufficient sleep.

Kiro: Or a limited-edition Kiro hug?

Kiro: I’ll decide on both of them on your behalf~

-

2. Mood: Upset

MC: My daily self-reflection -- Has the program been approved? Not yet :(

Kiro: My daily self-reflection -- Do I think about Miss Chips?

Kiro: Always. 

Kiro: Miss Chips, do your best!

-

3. Mood: Angry

MC: Good news. The program I’ve been painstakingly working on for several months has been rejected. :)

Kiro: Whenever my albums get delayed, I’ll take Apple Box out for a walk.

Kiro: Since Apple Box doesn’t have a slot recently,

Kiro: Why don’t I take you out for a walk instead?

🌻

[ LIFE - Topic 1: Losing Weight ]

1. Mood: Happy

MC: I've reached my ideal weight! I’m really happy~ I can finally toss away the salad that even Apple Box dislikes.

Kiro: Although I didn’t think you were fat before,

Kiro: What’s most important is that Miss Chips is happy!

Kiro: P.S. You’ve stopped eating snacks recently - Apple Box and I are both very upset.

-

2. Mood: Upset

MC: A sincere question - If your weight remained the same after dieting and exercising for a week, would you choose to feast ferociously on crayfish or barbecue? 

Kiro: Since your weight is so disobedient,

Kiro: Let’s punish it fiercely!

Kiro: Why don’t we have barbecue along with crayfish!

-

3. Mood: Angry

MC: Why is it that every time I indulge in extravagant eating and drinking, I always scroll to a page showing models with incredible figures?! I’m once again putting up a flag to lose weight!!

Kiro: Promise me that you won’t go on a diet to lose weight.

Kiro: Effective exercise and a reasonable work-life balance is the correct way to do it.

Kiro: But will our weekly dessert day continue?

-

[ LIFE - Topic 2: Meals ]

1. Mood: Happy

MC: Burp-- I had a buffet this afternoon, and I’m so full now. Let me secretly tell you that I had to support myself on the wall to get out.

Kiro: Hahaha, I’m also the same after a photoshoot,

Kiro: Wanting to stuff myself to the brim.

Kiro: Next time, let’s compete to see who is the true buffet killer!

-

2. Mood: Upset

MC: I’ve entered a special bottleneck period - What should I have for lunch? What should I have for dinner?

Kiro: Mm... this is indeed a big problem which frequently stumps me.

Kiro: Want to watch a documentary on delicacies?

Kiro: You might be able to find some “inspiration” on what to eat.

-

3. Mood: Angry

MC: I was seized by a whim and did some cooking. When I changed the seasoning just slightly, I ended up creating a mysterious, indescribable taste...

Kiro: Mm... has your cooking magic lost its touch temporarily?

Kiro: That’s all right 

Kiro: Tomorrow, we’ll try again together. 

-

[ LIFE - Topic 3: Reading ]

1. Mood: Happy

MC: I came across a picture book today, and readers can use their fingers to make a dot in the book grow bigger or smaller~ It’s very adorable!

Kiro: I really wish Miss Chips were that little dot.

Kiro: That way, I can make you really tiny

Kiro: And store you in my pocket. 

-

2. Mood: Upset

MC: There’s a book wasteland... Why can’t I find a single good book...

Kiro: Someone said that the most interesting book is a person’s life.

Kiro: Could the reason you’re unable to find a good book

Kiro: Be because your life is already very interesting?

-

3. Mood: Angry

MC: I’ve been keeping up with a web series, but the author said that he decided to go on a hiatus today after receiving negative comments. My spiritual nourishment is gone...

Kiro: Negative comments truly make people upset

Kiro: Want to leave an encouraging comment to the author?

Kiro: Tell him that there are many readers who like his work!

-

[ LIFE - Topic 4: Games ]

1. Mood: Happy

MC: Ding-- Dear respected customer, your gaming partner has found another interesting game. If you wish to know the name of the game, kindly reply with a ‘1′

Kiro: Rejected.

Kiro: Hahahaha, I’m just teasing you.

Kiro: 11111!

-

2. Mood: Upset

MC: Help... I’m stuck at the fifth stage of this riddle game. What do I have to do so the squirrel would release its hold on the key?

Kiro: There’s actually such a mean squirrel?

Kiro: Let me handle it!

Kiro: If it doesn’t work, I’ll let Cello catch it!

-

3. Mood: Angry

MC: My hand slipped when I was playing a game today, causing the entire game to restart :) Don’t stop me - I’m going to chop off this troublemaking hand!!

Kiro: An urgent appeal to spare your hand!

Kiro: Think on the positive side,

Kiro: We now have another thing we can complete together~

🌻

[ SCHOOL - Topic 1: Progress ]

1. Mood: Happy

MC: I've prepared a studying schedule, and am filled with confidence for this new life of studying! Kiro, please supervise me from time to time!

Kiro: Understood! 

Kiro: If you get lazy--

Kiro: Heheh, there’ll be punishment. 

-

2. Mood: Upset

MC: I’ve been staring at my book for an hour in a daze. Why do I understand the words in isolation, but not when they are strung together?

Kiro: Mm... from a certain perspective, isn’t knowledge a series of code?

Kiro: Read them as though you’re playing a riddle game. 

Kiro: Perhaps you’ll find a way to pass the stage!

-

3. Mood: Angry

MC: Why does my brain function so slowly the moment I start studying? Isn’t it very amazing when I play games?!

Kiro: I’d like to correct two mistakes Miss Chips made--

Kiro: Number One, whenever you get stuck in a game, you’d let me take over;

Kiro: Number Two, your brain isn’t functioning slowly. It’s just time to take a break.

-

[ SCHOOL - Topic 2: Homework ]

1. Mood: Happy

MC: Because I remembered the reward you mentioned, I finished my homework really quickly today! What’s the reward, what’s the reward?

Kiro: I already said that you could definitely do it!

Kiro: As for the reward,

Kiro: Come closer, and I’ll tell you.

-

2. Mood: Upset

MC: Whenever I do homework, it seems that aside from the homework, I become curious about everything else. Oh yes, do you think a dog sees itself as a dog?

Kiro: Miss Chips, concentrate!

Kiro: But for your question, I’ve asked Apple Box about it

Kiro: It responded and said...

Kiro: Bark!

-

3. Mood: Angry

MC: A sincere question - can homework be done in stages? I really can’t finish it ahhh!

Kiro: Take your time, I’ll accompany you.

Kiro: Although I don’t know if homework can be done in stages,

Kiro: But my care for you is a fixed asset.

-

[ SCHOOL - Topic 3: Pre-exam Revision ]

1. Mood: Happy

MC: The exam is coming up soon. It’s a good thing you supervised me and ensured that I studied seriously. The scope of the exam was also very clearly detailed by the teacher!

Kiro: I think you forgot the most important thing--

Kiro: Miss Chips’ own diligence and hard work.

Kiro: Miss Chips, all the best for your exam!

-

2. Mood: Upset

MC: Memorising the examinable points is really difficult. It feels as though the moment I memorise a sentence, I forget the earlier one. How do you memorise the lines in your script?

Kiro: I have my exclusive Kiro memorisation technique of course!

Kiro: It’s exceptionally effective!

Kiro: If you want know about it, bring a bag of chips over to me~

-

3. Mood: Angry

MC: When the teacher was pointing out the important segments, he said the first three chapters are the foundation, the following three chapters are important, and the final three chapters are examinable. Doesn’t this mean I have to revise the entire book!

Kiro: It takes a long time to revise the entire book.

Kiro: Do you need a Kiro exam buddy?

Kiro: It comes with a massage, milk tea delivery, and hugs.

-

[ SCHOOL - Topic 4: Post-exam celebration ]

1. Mood: Happy

MC: The exam is over~ After comparing answers, there doesn’t seem to be any big issues! Kiro, who supervised me in my revision, is the best!

Kiro: Congratulations Miss Chips!

Kiro: Since I’ve rendered outstanding service, as a reward,

Kiro: Give all your post-examination resting time to me~

-

2. Mood: Upset

MC: The exam is finally over... I actually don’t feel very happy... Could it be because the final question was simply incomprehensible? 

Kiro: Hasn’t Miss Chips been looking forward to this day for a very long time?

Kiro: In that case, I have to find a way to cheer you up.

Kiro: Let’s laze on the sofa and watch your favourite movie. How’s that?

-

3. Mood: Angry

MC: I messed it up... I gave up on the last two questions... I think I’ve definitely messed it up...

Kiro: Maybe all the questions in front were correct!

Kiro: Also, one exam doesn’t mean much

Kiro: You’ll always be the smartest Miss Chips in my heart!

[theobsessor1]

Drunken Noodle

Summary: Deceit should know better, going through with another one of Remus’s ideas. He thought it would have been a one time deal, just something for them that night to experiment with his more reptilian side. But he’s starting to regret it with the growing nest of eggs, and horrible uncertainty of feelings swirling in his chest...he might be in some trouble here.

Pairings: mild intrulogical, qpp demus, hinting at Lociet

Warnings: drinking, alcohol. hinting at slight alcoholic problem.

Word count: 3087

previous chapters ch.1, ch.2, (read on ao3)

(wish to support me buy me a coffee :3)

Chapter 3 of “Say Something” series

Deceit huffs, sitting partially slouched over the dinning table as he sips from his wine glass, munching on gummy rats that Remus had summoned him to help brighten his sour mood. Said creative side was currently sitting across from him going on about something or another.

Deceit wasn’t paying attention, just enough to mindlessly nod when needed, letting the side jabber and get his energy out while the snake side sulked. Hmm...maybe he should pay Remy and Emile a visit. He hadn’t gone to see them since...well, it’s been awhile. 

It took him a moment to realize that Remus had stopped talking, The Duke had turned to stare at the stairs of the subconscious that led up to the mindscape...Standing at the bottom of them was Logan, he was just there! Casually looking around the room where he stood. It’s quite a surprising site to see, no wonder it drove Remus speechless. Well besides the fact that he’s obviously rather fond of the other side. After a moment, Deceit clears his throat. “Can we not help you?” 

“Actually, yes. I wanted to talk to you about something.” Logan straightens his tie and clears his throat, brushing off the fact he hadn’t realized the two sides were at the table. “Oh?” 

“Well more specifically, the events that occurred during our discussion with Thomas earlier today. I wanted to apologise on the behalf of the other. They were rather dismissive of you, despite you bringing up some rather valid points. I..” Logan coughs. “You can say I understand to a degree the feeling of being brushed over, so to speak, and that I inf act do not condone such behavior especially to someone who is actually contributing and trying to help.” 

Deceit has to take a moment to collect his thoughts and form proper words through the fuzzy haze of alcohol... This almost seems like some joke. “...Thank you for the apology, though it’s rather unnecessary. You're not the one that needs to apologise, if you want me to be honest you deserve an apology more than me” he points at Logan with an unimpressed lift of his brow. 

The spectacled side sighs “Regardless, I bring the apology and regret that I had not attempted to get them to listen to you.” “It’s whatever. I appreciate it I guess.” Deceit mumbles, waving a hand concedingly and taking another sip of wine clearly not very concerned with this conversation. 

“I could tear out their tongues for you!” Remus offers, way too excited at the idea. Logan frowns shaking his head “That’s...very thoughtful of you Remus, but I don’t think that’ll be necessary.” 

“It would be more fun to shove them down the stairs, like a couple of really annoying slinkies” Deceit adds mumbling into his drink Remus snickers nodding while Logan shakes his head “I appreciate your offer and suggestions, but that’s still a no. We want them to listen, not get them hurt.” 

Deceit stands from the table swaying almost like a snake influenced by a snake charmer. “Well, that is much easier said than done. They’re bound to get hurt before they start listening to anyone.” He picks up his glass intent to make his way to the couch “You’ve said your apology, you don’t have to stick around any longer.” Logan raises a finger, opening his mouth to speak only to close it as he squints at the snake side as Remus gets up coming behind Deceit and scooping him up into his arms, spawning tentacles from his back to help properly support the side in his arms. Using one of said tentacles to slip the wine glass away from the snake sides reach. “Is he drunk?” 

Deceit hisses, attempting to wiggle from Remus’s grasp and snatch his drink back “I’m not drunk...yet...I think.” 

“...Do you intend to get drunk?” The logical side crosses his arms, frowning at them. Deceit shrinks down on himself guiltily 

“...Maybe…” 

Logan’s frown deepens as he shakes his head “I’m getting you a glass of water, have either of you eaten anything?”

Remus carries a definitely not pouting Deceit over to the couch where Logan had pointed for them to sit as the snake side replies “I’ve only eaten a few gummies so far.” 

“I ate ass!” The duke enthusiastically answers plopping onto the couch and still holding the grumpy snake side protectively in his arms and tentacles.

“He means a peach.” 

Logan huffs heading into the kitchen, making himself at home as he goes about sifting through the cabinets and fridge “I’m going to make the two of you something proper to eat, do either of you have any dietary restrictions?” 

Remus nods with a bounce, he knows the answer to that! “DeeDee doesn’t like mushy stuff ‘n I don’t like citrus.” Logan nods, filing that information away for later. He has managed to find a box of noodles and some tomato sauce, spaghetti is easy to make and hopefully satisfying to the two sides. It grows quiet for a while save for the sounds of Logan cooking, filling a pot with water and setting on the stove to boil with the noodles. 

Remus plays with Deceit’s hair keeping himself occupied as they await the meal. Something must be up, why else would the logical side have decided to suddenly care to apologize to him, to care if he was drunk or for that matter make them food?? Wasn’t he the one that usually would argue that they didn’t need it?

Deceit can’t help but squint suspiciously at the side, “You’re totally not planning something?” he hisses flicking his tongue out with his words. 

“Well, I”m planning to feed you some spaghetti and try to get you to drink some water to help keep you hydrated from your consumption of alcohol.” The snake side huffs knowing that was the logical side's so called plan. But he wants to know the real one! He opens his mouth to say as much but Logan continues “Maybe re-discuss points from earlier conversation with the others and Thomas since, well, neither of us got to share our opinions on the matter...If that is what you are asking?” 

Deceit sits up, turning around on the couch and propping himself up on his elbows to look at the logical side, eyes narrowed. That can’t possibly be all. There’s gotta be something else here, he’s sure of it. 

Remus finishes the braid he’s been working on, wiggling happily at his work before starting another. “I could think of some tasty things to do instead off boring ol’ talk!~” 

The snake side sighs “Remu-” “Oh! I tried that mushroom thing from Hannible! You gotta come check out the corpses with me!” 

“Re-” “The roots really did spread through the whole body! I got one of them to be oozing-” 

Deceit huffed snapping his fingers to focus the creative side’s attention, the duke’s mouth clicking shut and heading whipping around to find the sudden source of noise.

“I know you want to talk to him about all those wild ideas of yours dear, but do you think you can wait till after I interrogate him?” 

“Oh! Yeah, I’ll wait!” Remus nods his head like a bobble head, stilling as he goes back to focusing on playing with Deceit’s hair, a third braid in the making...he might be attempting to stick an eyeball in it...or a tooth. 

Logan adjusts his glasses as his brows furrowed in confusion, the glasses fogged slightly from the steam of the cooking pasta “Interrogate me? What for?” 

“Well see Logan, you never come down to this part of Thomas’s mind. Nor really have you ever shown an interest in our care, save for Remus of course when he’s visiting you but that's just a given.” he makes an offhanded gesture to Remus “So tell me, what is your true motive for all this.” 

Logan pauses in his task of stirring the pasta sauce “My motive?” 

“Yes your motive, I may be intoxicated but I can still tell when something is suspiciousss.” 

Logan tilts his head at the snake side, beginning to absentmindedly stir the pot again. “Have I been acting suspicious. I do suppose a divergence from usual patterns would make something seem suspicious and put you on edge.” he thinks aloud. 

He shakes his head, turning the heat off the stove and mixing the sauce into the noodles. “I have no secret motive, no ulterior plan, I am merely tired of the treatment and order of things...of course that’s now paired with the fact that I am concerned about your alcohol consumption.” 

Deceit rolled his eyes “Well the whole treatment and order is going to be harder to change than just coming over for a visit…” he moves from Remus’s grasp to lean over the back of the couch “And my so called alcohol consump-consumption is fine! I didn’t have a lick of it for a couple of weeks!” Of course that was because he wasn't about to drink such stuff while he was preg- for reasons, wasn’t drinking it for specific reasons he will not ever talk about...yes.

...for a pink and yellow, brown speckled reason currently in his bedroom hidden with the other one. 

Logan hummed, not convinced as he made plates, putting the finished spaghetti on dishes before carrying them to the table “Either way, you two are eating and then getting to bed. No shenanigans or schemes, whatever it is you two do when left alone down here.” 

Deceit can’t help but pout at that, he doesn't have plans for the night but still, he doesn't want to be told what to do and be put to bed like some child thank you very much. 

Remus finishes with the sides hair and scoops him into his arms again. “I can walk myself!” 

“I know” :D

Stuck being carried it seems, the snake side just sighs, there’s no use fighting Remus, they’re both touch starved as is and the dukes pentiant for just snatching and carrying people around is a constant. 

He gets gently deposited into his usual place setting at the head of the table, Remus sitting by his side and eagerly digging into the food...he does notably try at an attempt to be polite and use a fork as he stuffs his face tonight. 

Deceit sulks conjuring himself a wine glass by his bowl, eyes widening when Logan snatches it away and puts a glass of water down. “Excuse me?” 

“No more wine tonight. Water” 

Remus giggles at his expression, the snake side not used to someone trying to boss him around like this. 

He can’t help lifting a challenging eyebrow at the logical side “No wine?” Deceit waves his hand over the glass of water turning it into a glass of whiskey on the rocks “Fine.” 

Logan raises an eyebrow back, clearly unimpressed and frowning. He gives a huff taking the glass, poofing it out of existence and putting a glass of water down once again. 

Deceit flicks his wrist changing the water to vodka, his eyes sparkling with amusement as he watches Logan. The logical side huffs “enough” he snaps turning the drink back into water “you will drink the water, eat and then we can assist you to your room for re-” “No!” 

Logan sputters to a stop startled by Deceit’s sudden shout and looking to the snake side with bewilderment.

Deceit blinks before flushing lightly as he looks down at his place sheepishly, he hadn’t even realized he had stood, now seating himself back down. “Apologies...I um I would just prefer not to be in my room tonight.” he pokes at his plate with his fork hoping Logan wont see through his lie

“R-right.” Logan clears his throat, adjusting his tie in that lil tick of his “Well, then um we can make you comfortable on the couch then? Will that suffice?” 

Deceit quickly nods “yes, the couch will be fine.” 

The dinner seems to be rather dull after that, Remus and Logan going back to discussing what Remus had done in the imagination inspired off of the Hannibal episodes they have watched together. Janus watches them chatter fondly, the two animatedly talking and gesturing back and forth...It’s nice seeing the two enjoy themselves like this. Especially Logan, it’s not often you get to see the logical side light up like this. 

With a small hum he stands with his empty bowl taking it over to the sink without a word, not wanting to interrupt. 

He tries to walk past the table without being noticed, if he can sneak past he may be able to make an escape to the imagination and to his two favorite traits. Of course things never go as planned, why would they. Remus immediately perks up and the creaking of his chair is the only warning Janus gets before the creative side pounces, pinning him to the ground.

Janus sighs with a groan “Really? Remus why-” they both pause with confusion and looking to the dining table, hearing a small giggle and a snort. 

Logan was watching them, a hand covering his mouth to stifle the sound of a laugh, eyes full of amusement and fondness...they made the logical side laugh?!

Remus's eyes sparkle surprised that he got Logan to genuinely laugh! He beams excitedly at the logical side “You laughed!” 

Logan blinks, his cheeks turning a light shade of pink as he quickly lowers his hands “I-I um think you misheard.” 

Remus shakes his head quickly scooping up Janus and holding him out to Logan like one holds a feral cat away from themselves “No! I heard it! J-eh Dee-Dee did too!” 

Janus gives Logan a disgruntled look but nods, not appreciating how he’s being held “I did here it too. You do realize you can’t exactly lie to me right?” he flicks out his tongue at Logan as if to emphasize he can sense them. 

Logan sighs fiddling with his tie “Remus I don’t think it’s good for you to hold Janus like that. Why don’t you get him to the couch and I can get him some pillows and blankets from his room.” he suggests quickly in an attempt to change the subject. 

Remus nods, eyes still sparkling as he pulls Janus closer, of course it's a bit of an issue when the snake side is wriggling and squirming as if trying to escape. “No! Don’t you dare go into my room!” 

Remus takes a hurried step back conjuring his tentacles again to try and keep a hold of the snake side who's baring his fangs at Logan and hissing angrily. 

Logan flinches, face scrunching with confusion as he quickly puts his hands up “I apologize, I didn’t mean to over step! I won’t go into your room if it makes you uncomfortable.” 

Janus calms, going still in Remus’s arms looking a bit disgruntled as he gives one last soft hiss at Logan. 

Logan huffs and Remus turns around so Janus can’t look at Logan anymore “Welp I think Logan had the right idea, someone had too many silly drinks, bed time!” 

Janus whines “I did not have too many, and I'm not tired. Put me down.” 

Remus shakes his head dropping Janus right onto the couch “Nope, it's bedtime! I’m putting you to bed and ain’t nothing you doing about it.” Janus makes more unhappy noises before squeaking at the sudden weight of Remus flopping on top of him. 

“You're not even going to let me get comfortable?” 

“Nope” >:3

Janus huffs glaring at the ceiling of the living room resigned. 

Logan smiles making his way over “Maybe it would be best to let him get comfortable, I don’t think I’ll be able to sit with you otherwise.” he pauses “That is of course if it's alright if I stay?” 

Janus sighs as Remus quickly scoots off him “Might as well, you’ve made yourself at home thus far.” he sits up to move to the side so that Remus and Logan can probably cuddle, only to stiffen up when he’s suddenly squished between the two sides. 

Remus wiggles some before snapping his fingers and changing them all into comfortable t shirts and pajama shorts before wrapping Janus up in a blanket “You gotta wrap Dee up in a blanket so he can burrow and stay warm, otherwise you get a grumpy snek who can’t sleep.” 

Janus sputters glaring at Remus from his cozy blanket burrito“Don’t give away my weaknesses!” 

Remus ignores him, smiling at Logan “and squish him! He sleeps best when squished” 

Janus hisses as Remus leans on him more, and makes an offended noise when he is shushed by the creative side. And again when Logan leans on him next. He’s definitely squished between the two sides now. 

No escape! Damn it!

Remus snickers resting his chin on top of Janus’s head as Janus yawns, his forked tongue curling. Janus huffs giving a weak shove at the creative side. 

Logan watches fondly “You two seem...rather close? But I suppose that’s a given with the two of you living together down here for so long?” 

Remus nods “Something like that, and well-” he shrugs unsure what the right words would be “ I don’t know, I’m wild and feral and got no boundaries, and Dee’s the exact opposite, balance each other, I guess.” 

Logan nods, watching amusedly as Janus’s eyes grow heavy. 

“You would think that we would hate each other but we kinda just found our own system of things together that works for us…” Virgil used to be part of that too, but well...guess yeah win some you lose some or...whatever that saying is.

Logan hums resting his head near Remus’s “and...you don’t suppose...that I could possibly join this system? I um” Logan clears his throat looking away nervously “I um mean more so if its alright I keep visiting for the most part. You always visit me an-” “yes” 

Logan pauses looking to Remus 

“Yes, you can come visit, it’s not like we can stop you” Remus smirks at him “think of yourself as an honorary member here, i'll make ya a badge and everything.” 

Logan smiles before they both blink and look down, hearing soft sleeping noises coming from Janus, a lil bit of his tongue sticking out as he sleeps. 

Remus snickers at that, getting himself more comfy. "Heheh… sleeping snek…"

[bigskydreaming]

So this is definitely one of my least favorite things to do, because there’s so many people on here that need help, but if anyone has a couple bucks or a five they can spare, that would be an enormous help to me today. 

For those that know my situation, as far as I know, everything is still on track for me to have the lets-pull-all-twenty-eight - of-your-remaining-teeth-at-once-it’ll-be-fun! surgery on Tuesday. I’m reeeeally looking forward to it, and also the Month of Living Without Any Teeth At All while I heal and they figure out the fittings and everything for my bionic teeth or whatever. Everything about it sounds swell. Can’t wait, it’ll be great.

SO. The plan is for me to take the bus out to the desert on Monday afternoon, reenact some of the best scenes from Saw on Tuesday morning while under hopefully heavy sedation, with fingers and toes crossed that these doctors actually listen to me for once about my ridiculous metabolism making most anesthetics wear off super fast. Because. Ugh. Doctors literally never believe me about that which has led to some pretty not cool experiences in the past, but none of those experiences have been yanking out every one of my teeth by the root all in one go, soooooooo, if ever there was a time for them to think maybe I actually know what I’m talking about and make adjustments for that, I’m pretty sure I want this to be that time. 

Thanks to my keen intuition, I have predicted that this whole process is something I probably want to be deeply unconscious for, and during, and tbh, maybe a week or so after that too. But like, I’ll mostly settle for just not waking up when they’re only actually on tooth eight, you know?

If I seem like I’m babbling cuz I’m nervous, its probably cuz I’m babbling cuz I’m nervous. I’m so not kidding about unpleasant experiences with anesthetics in the past, so while this wasn’t actually my reason for making this post, while I’m thinking about it, if anyone wants to also maybe shoot a quick prayer-tweet over to whomever you might personally @ with that kind of thing, I would be super grateful for anything of that nature, like something along the lines of “Dear Merciful Higher Power/Universe/etc, if there’s any way you could see to it that Kalen spends most of Tuesday knocked the fuck out, that would be awesome, thanks!”

Its just, I’m kinda over being in excruciating pain all day every day, like, I gave it a shot, just don’t think its for me, I’m afraid I just don’t have what it takes to be a hardcore raging masochist or whatever, so I’m just really not looking to set any new personal pain records next week if at all possible.

ANYWAY, requests for spamming higher powers on my behalf aside, the other reason for this post is I only have $3 in my bank account and an appointment this afternoon whose co-pay is going to be $50. But I can NOT miss this appointment, its super critical. See, so, the other thing is, my jaw has decided its reached the point where it just doesn’t want to close at all anymore, so I’ve gone from only eating once a day to only eating no times a day, and since I’ve already lost an absurd amount of weight and muscle mass over the last two years because of all this shit, they’ve put me on a regimen of regular IV intakes or whatever that’s called, just to like....get the nutrients I need into me somehow, y’know?  

And especially with the surgery coming up on Tuesday, and my immune system all shot to hell and my various other Vitally Important By-Products of Eating Food levels are low enough to have my doctor using mostly just four letter words when reviewing my latest labs, they’re literally trying to pump me full of as much of the various Nutrients And Other Stuff IVs as they safely can between now and then. And as much as I’ve been pretty much going 24/7 trying to stay afloat with all of this, I just...did NOT budget for needing to be hooked up to an IV every other day because my fucking jaw picked now to level up on being an asshole and like, physically will not cooperate with my attempts to survive on cheap $5 a day meals. 

So instead this week its been $50 co-pays every other day, because apparently when your body for whatever reason literally can’t take in the cheap 7-11 snacks and Happy Meals you usually live off of because That’s How Being Poor Works, it makes total sense that the one and only alternative for keeping your body fueled is to go to this little clinic place that hooks you up like you’re at a gas station, except you’re some kinda pretentious European model that won’t accept any less than the top dollar diesel, because I guess even Bags of Nutrient Water gotta somehow manage to be name brand shit, because yay capitalism. Everything about it is just so efficient and logical and works so well, especially if you’re part of the 99%.

Anyway I’m TRULY sorry I’m all over the place with this, I haven’t taken my ADHD meds because swallowing is the Devil’s Work right now, and also I haven’t had my daily Bag of Nutrient Water yet so my brain is like no I will not be cooperating. To sum up, once I get to next week I’m all set, everything’s in place for the surgery, insurance, I have a place to recuperate, I even already have my bus ticket for Monday purchased, my specific monetary issue right now is I am literally down to my last $3, I am currently physically unable to chew my way through a full meal, so I’m literally just paying co-pays of $50 every other day to spend 45 minutes sitting in a chair while my body sucks life-sustaining nutrient water through a needle. 

That might actually be the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever said or heard said and yet its factually 100% true. Our world is so fucking bonkers, jfc.

Literally ANY help getting me to today’s appointment, would be amazing, and then I have one scheduled for Monday morning before I leave, if I can find a way to make that too. And tbh I don’t actually know if one is even an option for tomorrow yet because the clinic I’ve been going to so far isn’t open tomorrow and I’ve yet to hear back if my doctor found somewhere else to send me that I can actually get to. So who the fuck even knows.

So yeah, sorry for making you ping-pong your way through that mess, this is my brain on Empty, like I said, I haven’t had my Bag of Water yet today. But any help is appreciated, whether reblogs, donations or good-thought-tweets for me on Tuesday. I’m a big fan of any of the above. Even $2 or $5 gets me closer to what I need, and if you can’t spare anything or have already sent or are sending what you can spare to another donation post, I totally and completely understand. And again, even just....good thoughts for Tuesday would be awesome, and certainly can’t hurt. I’m not like, worried about the surgery or whatever, its pretty simple, its more just....extensive. And my only real hope or want for it is just keeping the Ow factor as limited as it can possibly be. Whether that’s from the doctors coming through with a good strong hit of the goofy juice or some higher power telling all my nerve endings to take a sick day or just sit this one out, I am so open to either or anything in between or even coming out of left field.

And now I’m done. Thank you. You’re all rockstars, or insert your genre of choice. In conclusion, capitalism sucks, eat the rich, and buy a  bi a bag of water today please. I’m pretty sure there’s a T-shirt slogan in there somewhere, but fuck if I can pin it down.If anyone else does, hey, go nuts with it. I’m literally a bi guy who needs to buy bags of nutrient water every other day right now. That’s so fucking dumb, someone’s gotta be able to milk some mileage out of it.

My Paypal:

https://paypal.me/bigskydreaming?locale.x=en_US

Or if that link doesn’t work, try this one instead:

https://www.paypal.com/paypalme2/bigskydreaming?locale.x=en_US

My Ko-fi page: https://ko-fi.com/kalenp

[davidmann95]

This week's comics?

Anonymous said: Comics this week (02/16/2021)?

pretenderoftheeast said: Comics this week (2/17/2021)?

Anonymous said: Comics of the week?

o-w-quinlan said: Thoughts on comics this week? Personally loved Superman Worlds of War and the Nubia back-up of Immortal Wonder Woman.

Anonymous said: Thoughts on this week's comics?

Lots of demand for this week! I suppose it’s not too surprising though, by volume alone this was a big one.

Guardians of the Galaxy #11: The worst I can say about this one is it didn’t actively make me fear Ewing’s slipping the chains of his ever-growing power like the last couple.

Miles Morales: Spider-Man #23: A couple good moments, but I’m on the verge of dropping it tbh.

M.O.D.O.K.: Head Games #3: Purchased on my dad’s behalf but very much enjoyed by me as well - I’ve learned recently the creators referred to it as “Morrison’s Batman but for M.O.D.O.K.”, and if that’s not the ideal endorsement for a comic book for you I don’t understand why you visit my blog.

Iron Man #6: Feels like if not the vibe the concerns of contemporary Iron Man are really seeping in to this current off-the-wall run starting with this issue, and I’m here for it. Don’t think enough people are paying attention to this one.

Black Widow #5: Okay, I’m definitely onboard to see what the new direction is going to be coming out of this.

Batman/Catwoman #3: Mostly continues to be good but oh my goodness is that Batwoman suit every bit as bad as you heard and then some. In the abstract you could almost claim it’s a fusion of sorts between the aesthetics of both her parents, but then you see it in action and whoops nope you know exactly why this is the way it is.

Future State: Catwoman #2: Didn’t hit me as hard as the first one and I’m very ready to get back to V’s regular book with Blanco, but a decent time nonetheless.

Future State: The Next Batman #4: A solid story but I’m officially peeved that this whole thing was just one big teaser. The Batgirls backup was fine (and am I reading that one bit on the second-to-last-page right?), the Gotham City Sirens backup was so bad it’s the first comic I’ve put money down on in I don’t know how long that I gave up on and flipped through.

Future State: Nightwing #2: If future stuff with Jace doesn’t capitalize on his instant dynamic with Dick, mistakes will have been made.

Future State: Superman: Worlds of War #2: Complicated feelings! It’s a very well-done comic on a basic craft level, it largely makes me feel the things it makes me want to feel, and it gets on a fundamental level both how Superman is inspired by us and uses him in turn to dramatize human struggles on a mythological scale. On the other hand it draws a direct parallel between a black man’s struggle for his own civil rights and Superman fighting to free a space planet of alien slaves, and...uh. It’s not the agonizing inspiration porn bullshit I feared it could be from the preview, but it is a white dude meaning well and ending up with something that strikes me as pretty tonedeaf. Still, we got wild highs in the first issue, and tackling a concept that could have probably gone way worse this landed at “well-done in notable ways but really should’ve been thought through some more”, so I’d say PKJ’s run proper even if it stumbles shouldn’t outright fall on its face when it deviates from said highs. As for the backups, Mister Miracle and Midnighter were both fine (the latter did improve from the previous issue, if still not anywhere near where I’d want it to be), Black Racer was trash.

Future State: Immortal Wonder Woman #2: Not as crushing a disappointment as the previous issue, but still a gorgeous nothingburger that even squanders what felt like an obvious building reveal to wring at least some emotion out of what should have been a no-brainer easy win. Unless I hear amazing things skipping the run spinning out of this, which sucks when I was initially so excited. The Nubia backup is better but overloaded with exposition.

Once & Future #16: Bit of a transitionary issue, but I’m still continuing to vibe with it more as it goes along.

The Picture Of Everything Else #2: Loved it, and I think I’ll go ahead and reread The Picture Of Dorian Gray soon so I can appreciate this properly.

Abbott 1973 #2: Really starting to get concerned Ahmed has lost his touch.

Stillwater #6: Odd note to end the arc on, but I’m no less in now than I was at the close of the first issue.

Second Coming: Only Begotten Son #2: Feels like it’s rehashing a few familiar notes, but in some ways Mark Russell is always playing a familiar tune at this point and I’m content to hum along.

Penultiman #5: Hahahahaha holy shit

Haha #2: Certainly a different flavor from Ice Cream Man in a way the first issue wasn’t quite, but I’m still waiting for this book to really do something that feels completely different from Prince’s oeuvre up to this point.

We Live #5: This book has been defined for me since the debut issue as ‘what a pleasant surprise that shouldn’t work as well as it does’, and the ending here is the DEFINITION of ‘surprise that shouldn’t work as well as it does’. I don’t want to spoil anything more than that, but please by all means get this in trade or buy the existing issues if you haven’t checked it out to date.

[bouwrites]

Maribat March 2020 Prompt: Coffee Shop

Week 4, Day 3.

Maribat March 2020 Calendar.

Day 1: Sweetheart’s Dance, Day 2: Soulmate, Day 4: Roommates.

Ao3.

2185 words. Story under read-more.

Jon is not having a good day. It’s one thing when he’s woken up at 2am by Damian dragging him out the window to whatever godforsaken mission they have to handle at that particular moment. He’s used to that. It’s another thing when the mission runs well into the morning and he has a math test just a few hours later that very day. Jon is, again and unfortunately, used to it.

But it’s another thing entirely when that happens three days in a row and someone still insists on survival training. As if this entire week hasn’t been an exercise in survival. Well if I’m going to survive one more minute, Jon thinks, grumpily, I need coffee.

Naturally, in the moment he needs it most, there’s a line. A long one. That’s just his luck.

Regardless, as he stands in line at the little coffee shop, Jon does his best to tune out the rest of the world. He’s saved it enough the past three days. Now is coffee time. The world can wait.

That said, as he slowly approaches the counter, he does perk up a bit. Maybe it’s spending some quiet time with nothing to drag his attention away, or maybe it’s just proximity to his next few hours of energy, but he feels a little less dead, and pays a little more attention.

“Espresso.” The lady in front of him says. Her voice is accented, French, he thinks, but that’s not why Jon almost cringes at the sound of it. That is a lady having a bad day. “But, like, a full cup of it.”

Oh, mood. This lady should never meet Tim, though. Jon thinks idly, as the cashier hesitates just a moment before asking her what size cup. When she points to the one she wants, what’s happening suddenly catches up to Jon. Wait, that’s a lot of espresso. Is that safe? Is that legal?

Lady, are you okay?

Jon is trying to maintain his composure has the lady walks away and he quickly orders his own drink. He watches her out of the corner of his eye, sees her collapse in a seat in the corner.

She’s cute, for what it’s worth. Small and undeniably pretty, despite the clear exhaustion on her frame. Decked out in light pastel colors, she gives the impression of a bright, friendly girl. Except… she looks miserable.

Jon frowns, watching her. He can’t help but wonder what could possibly have happened to her to land her in this state. He wants to know what the problem is, because he wants to help, because she looks like she needs help, but… they’re just customers at a coffee shop. What’s he supposed to do? Besides, in addition to misery, she also has a very distinct “leave me alone or else” aura about her that makes Jon doubt the safety of approaching her. Is it more heroic to save her from… this, or to know when to tap out and let things happen?

Right, right. Good people get involved. But in coffee?

You know this is more than coffee. Maybe you can just… lend an ear? If she doesn’t bite it off.

Jon sighs, cursing his own nature and the parents who raised him to be this way. Too damn helpful for my own good. Okay, here we go. He does wait until he and the lady both have their coffee before he bothers her, but once he retrieves his cup he makes his way over to her corner table.

“Uh, hey there. Sorry to bother, I just… are you alright?”

The lady looks up at him, unimpressed, with dead eyes. They focus in on him slowly, but once they do, they hold an unquestionable intelligence that only makes Jon further doubt this decision. “M’fine.” She mutters.

Jon bites his lip. The dismissal is pretty clear, but still… “If you say so. Your, uh, drink says otherwise, though.”

The lady moves her eyes slowly to the coffee on the table, then back to him. “Busy week.” She says.

Jon chuckles. “I hear that. I’ve been running ragged this week. Something tells me mine,” he gestures to his own cup of coffee, and then to hers, “isn’t quite so bad as yours, though.”

The lady huffs a small laugh. “Maybe.” As she examines him more closely, Jon smiles for her. After a moment, she lets out an amused hum. “Do you often talk to strangers at a coffee shop?”

Jon pretend to think for a moment. “No offense, but you looked miserable. Like you might need some company. And honestly? I could, too.” He says seriously. Then, he adds, gesturing again to her drink, “Plus, I have to at least ask the story behind that.”

The lady hums again, and then sighs heavily. “I suppose you’re not wrong. Go ahead and sit. I won’t bite if you don’t.”

“Thanks. I’m Jon, by the way.”

“Marinette.”

“Marinette.” Jon echoes. “That’s such a pretty name! Definitely isn’t the kind of name I’d think would order that monstrosity.”

Marinette scoffs playfully. “Keep teasing and you can drink your coffee on your own.”

Jon laughs. “Alright, I hear you. No teasing. Coffee is very serious business. Especially when we’re trying to overdose on caffeine.”

“That’s still teasing, Jon.” Marinette sticks her tongue out at him. “Keep pushing your luck.”

Giggling, Jon does his best to regain control of himself. Despite how friendly she is being and how easily they slip into banter, they’re still strangers. Jon doesn’t want to overstep. That’s enough teasing for now. “So, bad week?”

Marinette groans. “You could say that. You?”

Jon nods. “Just been one thing after another. My friend, best friend, really, I love him, you know? But sometimes he’s just…” He sighs. “He can be hard to deal with. He means well, but it’s tiring being dragged unprepared into all the wacky situations he gets us in.”

Marinette pinches the bridge of her nose. “Oh, tell me about it. My best friend is the exact same way.” Jon grins at her, at the thing they have in common, but notices quickly how her expression darkens. “She was, anyway.”

“Oh.” Jon blinks, taken aback. “Oh, I’m so sorry.”

Marinette shakes her head. Idly twirling a pigtail, she says, “Not like that. I’m probably overreacting, but sometimes it feels like we’re… drifting apart, I guess. It’s not a big deal.”

“Drifting apart? Why’s that?”

Marinette narrows her eyes at him, as if trying to find something in him. Eventually she shakes her head again. “I suppose it can’t hurt… This girl we both know; she tells a lot of stories. Lies to make herself look good, that kind of thing. She just does it for attention, I think, but if someone calls her out, she gets malicious. My best friend, she considers this liar a friend. I… don’t. To say the least. It’s been… straining. Even without the liar trying to spread nasty rumors about me.”

“Ooh, yikes.” Jon says, grimacing. “I’ve met people like that. They suck.”

That brings the smile back to Marinette’s face. “Yeah, they really, really do. So far, my best friend hasn’t believed any of the bad stuff the liar says about me – she’s still a good friend to me and all that, I just… worry, I guess.”

“Understandably. Sounds like she believes her on the lesser stuff, so…”

Marinette nods solemnly. “Yeah. No matter what I say, she just seems to refuse to believe this liar is lying to her. It’s almost like she can do no wrong and that’s just…”

“That’s frustrating.” Jon says, earning her agreement. “It does sound like your friend could use some, uh… better judgement? But, I don’t think trusting in people is a bad mistake to make. If you’ll let a stranger give you advice, I think you probably just need to arrange some best friend time. Spend more time together without that liar, then you won’t feel like you’re losing her, because you’ll be spending more time together, but also you’ll be keeping her closer to your chest where the liar can’t reach her.”

Marinette quirks her brow at him. “That’s… borderline devious.”

Jon shrugs, smugly sipping his coffee. Damian isn’t his best friend for no reason, after all. If he didn’t have the head for at least basic plans before, Damian has drilled that out of him long ago. “Of course, I don’t know how often you hang out now or how much free time you have, but that’s what I think.”

Marinette purses her lips. “It almost sounds like you think I should try to beat her at her own game.”

Jon raises his brow, watching her. “Well, is her game lying, or taking your friends away from you?”

“Both.” Marinette says simply.

“And she’s doing that on purpose?”

“Definitely. She threatened me when I first called her out, said she’d take my friends and leave me all alone.”

Jon puts his cup back on the table. Hearing that cuts into him strangely deep, and he can feel anger on Marinette’s behalf begin bubbling. From the way she talks about this liar, Jon assumes the other girl is being malicious, but to actively threaten and try to isolate someone? That kind of bullying pisses him off. All bullying does, but Marinette seems like such sweet girl he just can’t stand the thought of that happening to her. “I see.” Jon says. Marinette sits a bit straighter, looking alarmed. Jon knows his voice is a bit colder than it should be. “Then definitely beat her at her own game. Don’t lie, of course, and don’t wear yourself out – I’m honestly not sure if it’s safe to drink that thing even once – but if you can, you got to do what you got to do, you know?”

Marinette frowns. “You really think so?”

“Sure. And worst comes to worst, you take the liar behind the bleachers and send her the way of Ol’ Yeller.” Jon says it jokingly, but a small part of him is legitimately protective of this girl he just met.

“Jon!” Marinette exclaims. “No!”

He laughs, which starts her laughing, and the atmosphere is suddenly so much lighter again. “Aw, I didn’t mean it. But you’re seriously, like, such a cool girl! I’ve only known you for ten minutes and even I can tell you’re awesome. I really don’t think you have much to worry about. If your friends have any brains, they’ll never let someone like you go.”

Marinette’s cheeks flush pink as she ducks her head. “You really… think that?” She asks quietly.

“Of course, I do! You’re funny, so darn easy to talk to – I mean come on, we met ten minutes ago – you’re smart, cute… if you survive that thing you might be immune to caffeine, too, so that’s pretty cool. No one in their right mind would leave you behind for anything.”

Marinette giggles, though her face only grows redder. “You cannot tell that by just ten minutes of conversation.” She says.

“Sure, I can!” Jon protests. “You’re awesome! And don’t let anyone, not even yourself, tell you otherwise!”

“Ahaha, you’re weird, you know that?” Marinette says. “Honestly, I don’t even know why I told you all that.”

Jon shrugs. “My dad always tells me that good people get involved. You looked like you were having a bad day, so I thought maybe I could help. That’s all. I promise I don’t normally talk to strangers when I’m getting my coffee.”

Marinette giggles. “Well, I’m glad you talked to me. I was having a bad day, but… I think today’s going to be good after all.”

“That’s the spirit!”

They laugh and talk until Marinette’s phone chimes and she sighs. “I’m sorry,” She says, “I’ve got to go.”

“No worries.” Jon says. “I hope you keep having good days.”

Marinette smiles at him for a moment and then, biting her lip, she ducks her head cutely. “Hey, uh, before I go… this might be weird, but could I have your number? I… actually really had a lot of fun. Maybe we can meet up again sometime?” Gaining more confidence, she jokes, “And you can complain to me instead, this time.”

Jon grins. “Sure thing. I’d love to see you again!” He quickly enters his number in her phone and hands it back to her. “Message me any time. Oh! And keep me updated on the liar.”

Marinette giggles. “I will. Thanks, Jon. I… I needed this. I’ll see you later.”

Watching her walk away, Jon sighs. “See you.” He says softly.

It’s been a strange morning, that’s for sure, but that girl is totally worth it all. Jon can’t be sure she’ll actually follow up with him – though it was her idea – but even so, she’s something special. Jon is glad to have even this short morning with her, and he hopes the rest of her life is as beautiful as she deserves.

And has just a little less caffeine. I cannot believe she drank that whole thing. I will never let her meet Tim.

[allie1804-fan]

Please Assist Me

So this is a new fic. I’ve not fully worked out where it’s taking me so watch this space. I’ve written quite a bit so let’s see how anyone likes the first little bit!

Chapter 1

He said

She was the third person we’d seen that morning. Cheryl was with me. I knew I could rely on her instincts to sniff out anyone the agency had sent who was likely to spell trouble. Of course, the agency promised to screen people so you didn’t get a nutter or an under-cover journo applying but Cheryl didn’t have total faith in their skills.

The first two had basically proved her right, being far more interested in looking round my house, asking who I might have visiting or unsubtly trying to see what freebies there might be than in finding out what the job really entailed. I was about to embark on my second directing project and I had an acting part too, so knew I was going to be all in as usual. That dedication to work would mean taking care of daily life would fall by the wayside.  I’d need someone to take care of travel arrangements if I was needed out of town, there would be some bills to pay, grocery shopping and all the other day to day crap like being around for deliveries or letting a plumber in or making sure birthday cards were sent. I didn’t say so but basically I was after an old style wife but without the relationship! I also needed to keep a certain amount of control, a small chink of ‘real’ if you will. So, if it was my sister’s birthday, I’d choose the gift and write the card but maybe I could use some help finding options to choose from given how busy I would be on set.

Sophia was the first of the interviewees who seemed to grasp the importance of this aspect to me and she asked good questions about the practicalities of me being involved where necessary. She was also the only one who seemed like she knew her way around a kitchen and one of my needs was going to be a little food preparation every now and again especially as I needed to watch my diet to keep in shape for the demands of the role.

After 2 more, frankly useless candidates were seen and ruled out, we both agreed that Sophia was the one. She wouldn’t be able to travel with me on shoots or promotional tours as she had 2 small children, but my main needs were going to be at home for the foreseeable future and things like buying a gift or a card for someone could be managed at a distance with modern technology and planning. A week after the interview, Sophia came over again for an induction session.

It took me a moment to invite her in – I was kind of stunned as I looked at her – I don’t think I’d really taken in how attractive she was at the interview,  being focussed on the interviewing task and making sure I was asking each interviewee exactly the same questions in order to be fair. That morning she was like a sunflower, clad in a bright yellow, sleeveless sundress. Her long brown hair was up in a practical ponytail and the dress contrasted beautifully with her tanned arms and legs, highlighting her Latin American heritage.

She followed me down the hallway to the kitchen, clutching a notebook which she’d brought to make notes on the tasks. By the end of our session, I felt in safe hands and she left with everything she needed to be my personal assistant starting with a one month trial period.

She said

My first real life encounter with Keanu was when I had an interview for the role of personal assistant. I hadn’t ever done a role like this having only recently signed on with a job agency after my divorce from Javier. Before that I had been a housewife and mum to our 2 kids Eva, who is 7 and Miguel who is 5.  Back before the kids were born, I had done a little modelling and in between jobs had done some “runner” jobs working on sets with A list actors. That experience, and my general organisational skills and domestic experience had identified me as someone suited to this role.

Of course, I’d seen Keanu on the silver screen like anybody else in all those big roles which made it all the more surreal to be heading up into the Birds streets for the interview with him and his PR lady Cheryl at his house no less.

Cheryl was charming but also quite formidable, giving me the impression that she’d kick the ass of anyone who messed with her client! Keanu himself was all charm but kind of shy and bumbling as he tried to explain the slightly unusual mix of mundane and personal tasks he was going to want help with.

The mundane were things like making sure his Koi carp were fed, that the pool guy, cleaner and gardener were  let in on the right days, getting his dry cleaning and some grocery shopping done. The personal was basically, as I saw it, the things a wife or partner would help a man like him do If he had one  - he wanted to make sure birthday cards and gifts were bought for his close friends and family but he would play a role in choosing them. He just needed someone to narrow down the options, make the actual purchase and wrap the gift. If he could, he’d deliver it in person but if he couldn’t do that, at the very least he’d write out a personal message himself.  

There would be some advanced planning to make sure all that happened on time as he’d soon be on set for long days on his next project. I suggested that I’d need to come over on a Saturday sometimes to  make sure he could add those personal touches.  

The job was basically perfect for me as I would be able to get everything done while the kids were in school and kindergarten. He didn’t expect me to travel when he did  - he could use hotel services when away and declared himself not so pampered or busy that he couldn’t organise some basic stuff for himself while he was away. He also had a place in New York so, if he had to go there , he had a home base. His main concern was that his LA home kept running well and I could handle all of that.

I was thrilled when I got the call that the job was mine and it was with excitement that I made my way back to his home a week later to get a more detailed briefing and start my month’s probation.  

I stood on the doorstep for what felt like a long minute after he opened the door. I had a moment of fear that he’s somehow changed his mind or forgotten our appointment but he eventually shook his head like he was jolting himself out of a day dream and invited me in.

“sorry, sorry, what am I like leaving you standing there! Come, come in!”

I followed him into the house and we headed down the long corridor and into the bright kitchen where we sat at the island and he took me through his diary and my tasks for the month. He gave me an iPad to use with an e mail already set up as KCR_assistant@outlook.com and a credit card I could use for the purchases he needed me to make on his behalf.

He was  starting on set the following week and his sister Kim’s birthday was a couple of weeks away. Since she lived in Italy this would be one of the more challenging gifts to organise. He shared a little about her and took me to his office to proudly show me her picture which was on a wall filled with family portraits.

“This is a test right?” I remember asking.

“nah, nah don’t see it like that ….” He stuttered

“But it’s really important to you right?”  I countered and he nodded, smiling slightly

“yeah, yeah Kim, she ……… she’s very  important to me”

“As she should be” I said. “I promise to get you some great ideas along the lines you want in a day or two so you can pick and we can get it to her on time.”

“Thanks”

I hoped I’d do Kim justice – I really needed to keep this job.

On my first day, I headed up to Keanu’s house after dropping the kids at school and shopping for groceries that had been on the list Keanu had e mailed the night before.

Laundry wasn’t in my remit, but I spotted as I went in through the garage that there was a load in the tumble dryer due to finish soon. Keanu must have forgotten it. I made a note to pop back and fetch it after I’d done some other jobs.

In the kitchen, I put away the supplies and got on with making the elements of a Caesar salad with chicken that Keanu could quickly throw together after work.

Then it was time to start gift hunting for Kim. Keanu was interested in getting her a vintage Italian coffee set and we’d agreed it made sense to source it from Italy. Being a native Spanish speaker, I could muddle my way through Italian websites and I narrowed the choices down to 3 which I            e-mailed to him as well as dropping him a text in case he didn’t check his e mails. He’d said he would have some down time during the day but he wouldn’t be expecting me to share ideas for a day or two.

By then it was 2pm and I needed to head off soon to fetch the kids. I grabbed the laundry and left a pile of t shirts (all Arch branded) and boxers neatly folded on his bed. I hoped he’d appreciate that I’d not left them to grow damp again in the dryer and that he wouldn’t feel weird that I’d touched his undies! If I’m honest it did feel a bit surreal to me to be in his home, dropping him e mails and texts, doing his shopping and folding his undies but I reminded myself that he was just a guy and, really, so far he’d been pretty down to earth in my dealings with him – well apart from the $1000 budget I had for Kim’s gift that is!

 @fortheloveoffanfic @kindainlovewithkeanu @omg-imagine @iworshipkeanureeves @fics-not-tragedies @ficsnroses @keanureevesisbae @penwieldingdreamer @witty-wallflower @paperplanesandwallflowers @bitchyslut99 @ladyreapermc @toomanystoriessolittletime @fanficsrusz @keanuficfiles

[amaryllisblackthorn]

mainly dgs-2 spoilers, mention of small dgs-4 spoilers + possible tiny dgs-3 and dgs-5 spoilers [basically spoilers for dgs]

(major) spoilers for episode 2 of dai gyakuten saiban !! (minor) spoilers for episode 4, (even more minor) spoilers for episode 3 and episode 5

so something that I find a little baffling and frustrating is how many people genuinely think sherlock is 100% completely dumb after episode 2 and miss the fact that the end part of the episode reveals that sherlock actually had already figured basically everything out for real and was mostly trolling before that

like I know a lot of people by this point complain that the ending of the episode drags on and they're probably not paying close attention as a result but that means they miss something really really important!!!!

after sherlock says his 'tbh I intended to let Scotland Yard take it from here, the only reason I got involved was to help you out bc I felt bad, but I forgot that the deceased was a dear friend to both of you, so from here on out you should seek the truth with your own eyes' && the epic music (Reasoning Battle - Introduction i think) starts to play, Sherlock is not only on his game but is guiding Naruhodou the whole time.

he guides naruhodou to the realization that the food was drugged, that the whole crew was in on it, that the emergency stop locked the door, and of course that something was in asougi's fist.

sherlock prompts naruhodou  with deliberate questions that put him on the path of the truth. 'have you all noticed the throbbing too?' 'by the way as a stowaway how did you come by your meals? ah so last night the victim didn't eat any of the meal?... seriously after saying that aloud you still don't get it?' and, in a way, his theatre of logic and reason is very similar! he guides naruhodou onto the path of the truth by pointing out the significant tells and observations but intentionally gets the logic wrong so naruhodou has a frame to work with to figure it out himself (the theatre also helps naruhodou's confidence in asserting his assertions but that's another thing)

this last part reveals that sherlock was onto the actual truth before he entered the cabin the second time. for one, he did the second emergency stop to confirm his suspicion that it would lock the doors!! not to mention that HE INSPECTED ASOUGI'S FIST AND FOUND NIKOMINA'S EARRING IN IT which probably happened at the very beginning since Asougi's body has been moved when Naruhodo wakes up, meaning that SHERLOCK SUSPECTED/KNEW FROM THE BEGINNING THAT A WOMAN/NIKOMINA WAS IN THE ROOM WITH ASOUGI WHEN HE DIED. so his 'great deductions' about the snake and it being an accident with the cat??? they were a load of bull!! like I'm sure sherlock was actually genuinely shocked about susato's snake facts, but he didn't actually think it was a snake that did it!!!

to reiterate, before Sherlock even gave his great snake deduction:

he knew nikomina was in the room with asougi

he suspected the ship did an emergency stop to lock the door 

likely had suspicions that the food was drugged and thus the whole crew was in on it (strengthened when stroganoff reveals nikomina's connection with the sailors & naruhodou reveals the meal situation & others confirm their heads have been hurting)

knew that someone framed naruhodou (the emergency stop, the Russian on the floor)

his great snake deduction and his great cat accident deduction were not serious actual deductions!! he was trolling!! that's what the last part of the ep reveals!! like i mentioned before, his false deductions serve a purpose in helping naruhodou but i’ll prob talk about that more another time.

but the point is, this end part of the episode reveals that Sherlock is a lot smarter than he lets on!! it reveals that he is, in fact, a great detective. he’s still chaotic and distressed about the disillusionment of snakes and impulsive and certainly thinks a lot of himself and stuff, but he’s /not/ actually stupid. he’s a troll; a trickster. and again, this plays into his false deductions sometimes and i’ll prob get into that another time.

but so many people completely miss and overlook this!!! they think sherlock is, while possibly endearing, genuinely stupid and a bad detective; they think he’s all talk, instead of just a lot of talk (bc he does sing his own praises all the time lol). and like, i can kind of see why, because his introduction makes such a strong first impression and when it’s revealed Sherlock’s actually smarter than he’s been letting on near the end, many people are preoccupied with their frustration at how the end seems to be ‘dragging on’. !!!DGS-3 AND DGS-4 SPOILERS!!!  and then there’s a whole episode until his next appearance, so it’s kind of easy to forget what happened at the end episode 3 !!!/DGS-3 AND DGS-4 SPOILERS!!! 

but it’s honestly pretty frustrating bc so many people miss something that’s really important! 

i mean idk it could just be the small sample size i’ve seen that’ve been missing it and it isn’t as big of a thing as i sometimes feel it is, and it’s not like i’m angry at the people missing it or anything -- i just feel like dgs sherlock deserves acknowledgement (altho he acknowledges himself enough to compensate for it and then some, hehe)

!!!DGS-4 AND DGS-5 SPOILERS!!!

like, more than once i’ve seen people go ‘oh so iris is the real sherlock’ when they get to iris’ theatre of logic and reason, and again i can get why bc of the (intentional) stark difference between the theatres, but imo the main difference is that iris plays it straight, not that she’s actually better at it necessarily. and like, i appreciate that iris says that she ‘just mimics the real thing’ bc while she likes giving sherlock a hard time, she does acknowledge his abilities (heh it’s probably good for sherlock that iris likes giving him a hard time, to keep him grounded) -- from what I can recall atm i think Iris ‘put downs’ of Sherlock tend to relate to like his immaturity and impulsivity rather than like dumbery or ineptitude

and im not saying that iris isn’t better/smarter than sherlock bc iris is great and she could be, but my point is the ‘oh so iris is the real sherlock’ bc it’s attached to ‘sherlock is actually dumb but just thinks he’s smart/the best’ which. isn’t true!! it’s ‘iris is smart and sherlock is also smart’ as well as ‘iris is more straight-forward about it while sherlock is often a troll’ and i’m cutting myself off here to prevent myself from writing ten more paragraphs except im going to reiterate i’m not necessarily saying iris isn’t smarter than sherlock and honestly sherlock probably thinks she is and at the very least when she grows up she’ll surpass him and sherlock will be happy

!!!/DGS-4 AND DGS-5 SPOILERS!!!

i’ve gone off a little from my original point so i apologize for that. my main point was/is supposed to be that the end of ‘the speckled band’ shows that Sherlock is a lot smarter than he lets on bc it reveals he’s been figuring out the actual truth before he even gives his great snake deduction which also reveals that his great snake deduction and great cat accident deductions weren’t sincere and brings into question his other great deductions which i will hopefully get into in another post.

OH i forgot to include why i think sherlock was trolling, besides giving naruhodou a framework to work with to figure out what’s going on. it’s nothin super solid but basically it goes back to what sherlock said himself re: ‘the only reason i got involved was bc i felt bad that you were involved but i forgot the deceased was a dear friend to both of you’ and?? again i’m not 100% sure but it’s possible that Sherlock suspected that it was manslaughter and not intentional murder and so wanted to ‘solve’ the case so that the 15-yr-old fugitive wouldn’t have to be repatriated and also so Naruhodou would be cleared of suspicion, but eventually realized that Naruhodou and Susato deserved to know the truth behind the death of their loved one (and was later able to negotiate with the immigrations office on behalf of nikomina). the fact that sherlock went out of his way to encourage naruhodou to check the back of the newspaper he gives them (the one about nikomina) suggests that sherlock suspected nikomina’s involvement before they meet her as roylott in her cabin.  take in mind that this is taking into account only what we know as of dgs and not taking into account anything potentially learned in dgs2.

also this isn’t really part of anything, but sherlock also has adhd vibes which i appreciate (i have adhd-i which is a little different than his but still) even if it wasn’t intentional