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thesilmarillionblog · 3 months

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𓏲 𓂃 L o s i n g Y o u

Part: 9

Click here to read the first part.

Summary: Everything was good as a member of Payback and Soldier Boy's secret girlfriend until the team and your relationship with him began to fall apart due to a new member and her developing relationship with Ben right in front of your eyes.

Pairing: Soldier Boy / Reader

Warnings: +18!(MINORS DNI), heavy angst, hurt, male masturbation, language, Soldier Boy is an asshole, PTSD, mention of drugs, mention of torture

Word Count: 4290

A/N: English is not my first language.

* This story is inspired by the song "Losing You" by Dream Evil.

Ben's chest began to feel colder beneath your fingertips, and the intense glow gradually subsided. Ben continued to stare at you in a way that defied explanation. It amazed you both that you were able to prevent the dangerous warmth in his chest, or perhaps he was controlling it subconsciously. But you knew you were the one who diverted his attention. While the heat beneath his body seemed under control, one of his gloved hands held yours on his chest, giving you an intimate look.

You muttered, trying to figure out what was wrong with him. “What happened to you?” Until you were certain he was indeed alright, you ignored the firm grip he had on your hand. You realized that he was probably not the one who intentionally exploded New York and that there was something very wrong with him.

“Well, baby, I'm not sure.” He gently put his palm closer to yours and remarked, “It's probably just a side effect of the things that happened to me in that fucking lab in Russia.”

You persisted by stating, “This looks dangerous, Ben,” despite his attempts to downplay his predicament and his continuous holding of your hands as if you were going to push him at any moment. “You might continue harming innocent people if you don't find a way to stop.”

Ben felt a wave of uneasiness pass over him, and his fingers tightened around yours. Because he was unsure of how to use his newfound abilities, he felt like a freshly empowered teenager, and you treated him as though you were a parent cautioning a careless youngster, which disturbed him and caused a sense of insecurity to take over.

“It's not a big deal,” Ben muttered in a harsh voice, trying to give the impression that he was stronger than this—even though at the moment he didn't feel like it. “As you can see, nothing happened. I suppose you were able to handle this for me in some way.”

You pushed his hands away and withdrew immediately when you verified that his body temperature had returned to normal. Ben scowled at the fact that, in contrast to him, you weren't very excited to be near since you two met again, but he felt as though his body would explode if he didn't get to touch you right away. His balls felt particularly heavy under his supe suit, and he didn't jerk off

for days—actually, years. Maybe you just needed to be alone with him to make a step.

“I think it's best that we remain together for the time being,” you stated in a serious tone. “Ben, it won't be good if you blow up again and can't control yourself.”

When you finally agreed to stay with Ben, he felt a sense of satisfaction that kept him smiling nefariously. He reasoned that maybe his newfound abilities weren't all that useless after all.

Ben grinned slyly and replied, “Course, sweetheart, since you're persisting in being with me that much. It would be better if I didn't stay alone.”

As he scanned your upper body expectantly and dismissed the situation with humor, you rolled your eyes.

“I believe there's a problem with his powers,” you turned to Butcher after you pushed Ben aside before he trapped you again and you sat down on the coach. “It is better if I stay with him.”

“If that's what you want, of course. Because of the situation going on in his chest, his ass gave us all enough trouble.”

Sitting on a coach with a coke in his hands, Ben followed you while you had a small talk with Butcher, his jaw clenching with jealousy, but he didn’t say a thing to make you feel uncomfortable.

Ben said, “It's not a big deal,” with an unkind glare in Butcher's direction.

Butcher said irritably, “It might not be for you, but it's a fucking big deal for us and all the people out there. In addition, I was wondering if the two of you could convince your former buddies to kill Homelander.”

“What?” you exclaimed, stunned. He spoke as though your guys had not always held hostility toward Ben. When he abruptly vanished, they most likely celebrated his absence. “Why do you believe they would offer Ben any kind of support at all? Everyone despised him.”

“Are you able to track them down?” Ben asked abruptly.

“They would hate to see you,” you murmured, your eyes widening in disbelief.

“When I find them, they fucking better piss in their suits,” Ben stated in a stern tone. “Noir will be the first person I'll fucking slaughter out of all of them.”

You cut him off, glaring at him, saying, “You stay away from Earving. You caused enough suffering for them all.”

“Why do you defend those who betray pathetic losers with such devotion?”

Since you've already been through a lot, Ben tried not to lose his temper when he was speaking with you, but he couldn't help but become enraged when he saw you standing up for betraying shitheads over him. He had great intentions for the two of you and was the only one who truly cared about you.

“Not them, Ben, but Vought was the one who betrayed both of us.”

You sighed and tried to seem empathetic and nice so as not to get on Ben's nerves too much because his new powers were already causing difficulties.

“Where were Noir or others when you were in that lab while the doctors were torturing you?” Ben pointed a finger in your face and demanded furiously. “You continue to defend those bitches against me, even though I am the only one who fucking saved you.”

“Ben, I won't argue with you.” With a wink, you teased him, saying, “You seem too sensitive for a proper conversation right now.”

Ben responded, “You are not making me angry, sweetie,” glancing at your body as your smile vanished and your cheeks turned crimson. “I want to take my meat off and jerk off at the moment because of you.”

Butcher replied, “Not on my fucking coach,” as you crossed your arms over your chest and averted your gaze from Ben's keen gaze.

Ben stated, “You tell me,” in a serious manner. “Where am I going to spend a week with Y/N?”

Ben was kind of relieved that he and you were both saved, even though he had not trusted Butcher and the others at all. He would have the opportunity to express how much he missed you in every way and would definitely help you start a second time by spending an entire week with you. You could speak, fuck, and do all of that for an entire week.

Feeling his balls getting tighter under his suit, he shifted on the coach, thinking of you in nasty positions, just like in the good old days.

“The location is arranged. Despite the little place to stay, I believe the two of you can get by for a week without needing any extra care.”

“What about Homelander?” Ben confidently inquired, widening his legs and placing his arm up to the coach, his hardness visible through his supe suit.

He saw you glancing at him and smiling mischievously. You wanted to say something offensive, but you knew that he was utterly without shame right then and there and that he would say something nasty as soon as you talked about his bulge.

Butcher sighed. “He's probably scared the shit out of his pants. Let's give him and you two a short break until the thing that happened in New York and Ohio is forgotten completely.”

You said, uncomfortable, “I don't think it will ever be forgotten, Butcher. Vought will try their hardest to capture us once more since the harm is too immense. They may even be looking for us at this very moment.”

It concerned you that Vought wouldn't just let you and Ben live on your own, unaccountably. It was not what you wanted to return to the lab to be tormented and examined for the future of other supes. But you had no idea how to get out of this difficult dilemma. Ben and the rest of Butcher's squad were not people you would trust with your life, so you realized you needed a plan to protect yourself from what was happening.

You also didn't want Ben to be tortured in Russia again like you were, but his main goal was to take revenge and murder Homelander. Despite never having laid eyes on the man, he was prepared to slaughter him. They would never allow Ben to touch Homelander if Vought was that supportive of him. That meant you had to first convince Ben to cease his collaboration with Butcher.

“People in the modern world are easy to forget, I promise you. Also, they could've already found you two if they had wanted to,” Butcher mumbled, trying to soothe you. “Remember, a week is full of possibilities, so try not to dwell on it too much. They won't remember for very long, and Vought is currently dealing with its own issues.”

When Ben realized how terrified you were of having to deal with the fallout from his actions and everything that transpired, his heart began to melt with regret. He was aware of your constant need for a house, a place where you could feel secure and at home, so it disturbed you to know that you had nowhere to go while Vought looked for you and that you might fall prisoner once more.

Ben understood that it was his responsibility as a man to ensure that you were protected and to keep you away from danger. You needed to spend time together before he could help you forget the unpleasant and harsh things he had done to you. He intended to start over with you, and whatever happened was all in the past. Homelander and Vought weren't that big of a concern, and things would be considerably simpler if he learned to use his new abilities. You were needed by him for both.

You leaned back toward the coach and questioned, curiously, “Why do you want to kill Homelander that much?” placing one hand under your head.

Butcher's heart clenched as a mixture of regret and affection overtook his body as his thoughts were filled with Becca's memories. Not that he even knew if he would survive.

He quickly cleared his throat and replied, “He hurt my wife,” cutting it short.

You understood, judging by her voice, that she had passed away, and you were at a loss for words. Homelander must be Vought's newest evil toy, as they have a history of hurting people and getting away with it. Somehow, you wanted to soothe Butcher, but all you said was, “I'm sorry to hear that.”

Butcher turned to face you, perhaps trying to persuade you, saying, “She is not the only one he hurt and won't be the last. He must die.”

“Even if he dies and you take your revenge, there will always be a new one, and you know this,” you insisted. “When it came to supes, Vought always had a backup plan. In the same way that they treated Ben and me. Not even the power worries them. All they want is a toy that they can play with that is practical as well as obeyant.”

“And they'll fucking pay for it,” Ben exclaimed with hatred.

“Ben, this is not going to end well for us. We are unable simply to overthrow the government or whomever in charge.”

“We'll see about that, sweetheart.”

You sighed, realizing that Ben had already made up his mind and that you two would have to talk about it at another time. He would hurt you once more if he carried on acting recklessly, but based on his actions, it didn't appear like he gave a damn. Even though you knew he was always self-centered, you were disappointed to find that he didn't give a damn about what would happen to you if he kept acting like an enemy of the state.

“Everyone had been told that you were a traitor and that you would be placed in a lab to be tested for potential superpowers. How were you treated by them? What did they do to you?” Frenchie narrowed his eyes and asked with curiosity.

You moved in the coach, pushing back the images in your head as you recalled the horrible memories. But you didn't let others see you as powerless or fragile.

You wanted to smile at him, but the traumatic images were just too overwhelming.

“I guess they kind of wanted to take off my womb to create a natural supe baby, but they simply couldn't as they couldn't go through my skin with their needles and everything,” you said.

While Frenchie was obviously at a loss for words while attempting to comprehend the years of agony you had endured, his face turned white.

Ben tried to dismiss the images in his mind, which ranged from vicious hands on you to someone trying to rip your body apart and kill you, while his heart was filled with hate and fury. He vowed to kill anyone who even slightly assisted in your torture, regardless of whether they were Homelander or Vought.

“Every single of them will die,” he declared with assurance, as if guaranteeing you, his compassionate green eyes locked on yours. “I promise it to you.”

You were briefly stunned, speechless, by the intense expression on his face, but you soon gathered yourself and joked, “It's better if you just do nothing,” attempting to break off the seriousness of the moment.

After glancing at the supe woman next to him, Frenchie remarked, “It's getting late. Will they be staying here tonight?” He asked Butcher.

Butcher grumbled as he looked at his watch. “Yes, this is where we'll all spend the night. There are probably enough rooms for them.”

“How about Annie and Hughie?” Frenchie asked again, observing the supe woman make her way to the nearest room; she seemed weary and exhausted.

She said nothing since you entered the house, which confused you. Although you were eager to start up a conversation with the new supe women, it's possible that she felt unsafe in the same room as Ben. It wouldn't surprise you. Even though you felt a little uncomfortable, you decided to try talking to her later. They might realize that you were no different from them in this situation if they truly wanted to take down Homelander's tyranny and those people weren't supporting the Vought like you were.

“They'll stay too,” Butcher cut it short.

Frenchie shot you a hesitant glance as his hand ran through the top of his head. “Is it possible for you and your friend to share a room? It seems like Annie and Hughie appear to be staying. There would be enough rooms if they didn't.”

“Yeah,” Ben responded abruptly, getting up before you could reply. As it turned out, you just gave Frenchie a brief nod.

Butcher responded, “Perfect,” and stood up. “Good night, ladies.”

You thanked Frenchie when he showed you the room you'll be staying with Ben and took a quick look at the cramped, dim room filled with old pieces of furniture.

Ben slowly unfastened his belt while he observed you searching inside the wardrobe for something to wear. His blood had been burning in his veins for an hour now, and he just wouldn't stop coming toward you. He was about to go crazy from his desire to touch you. You were alone for the first time in a very long time, so it's been a fucking long time since you've fucked properly. Ben's balls hurt from missing your gentle moans and seeing you beneath his body. You were finally alone to speak, fuck, and discuss things tonight about your future and all.

You turned your back to Ben to change after finding a pink t-shirt. Just after removing it, anxiety and the chill in the room caused your nipples to harden, and you felt Ben's eyes on your back.

Ben turned you quickly, crushed his warm lips on yours, and began to kiss you frantically before you had even put on your shirt. He was moving too fast for you to react, and you were too shocked and perplexed to do anything. He urged you to kiss him back by pushing your back against the bed and climbing on top of you, aggressively using his tongue in your mouth. The moment the chilly material of his suit touched your bare chest, you shivered.

Ben kept kissing you, getting lost in his pleasure, not able to understand if you were responding to him or not. His hardness was hurting beneath his supe suit. He put his hands around one of your tits and gave it a firm squeeze, pressing his shaft firmly between your legs.

You were in shock at how quickly everything was escalating. Only when you heard Ben unzipping his pants as his mouth filled yours with low growling did you come to your senses.

You stopped his tough hands from reaching your underwear and saved your burning lips from his. As you struggled to catch your breath, his lips slid quickly over your body, finding one of your nipples and aggressively sucking it until you forgot how to breathe.

You finally managed to say, “Ben,” in a trembling voice. “Stop it.”

When you forced his mouth away from your tits, he continued to press his firm shaft between your legs. He irritably asked, “What the fuck? It's been fucking so long.”

Ben placed his strong arms over your head and stared at your nipples that were covered with his spit through darkened eyes for a long moment until you finally gasped out and exclaimed, “I can't fucking believe you.”

“What now?” he asked, speaking as though nothing was wrong between you and that everything was normal.

“Are you a fucking rabbit in heat?”

He questioned incredulously, “Why are you so mad?” as he continued to delicately rub against your pussy with his shaft through your sweatpants.

“Ben, it has been practically decades since our breakup. We didn't even end our relationship properly because you remained silent and basically cheated on me by dating Crimson.”

Ben frowned as you mentioned the past, stopping his motions on you and trying to maintain his composure.

He just stated “We can talk about such things later,” sounding displeased to hearing his relationship with the Countess. “Let us get off some steam first.”

You whispered, “No,” and used all of your effort to push him away from you. “There is nothing left to talk.”

Ben watched your tits disappear from sight while you took the pink t-shirt he threw onto the floor, and you hastily took it on from your head with trembling hands. As soon as you moved away from him, he eventually stood up.

“It's all in the past now,” he remarked, regretfully glancing at your fragile appearance. “We can fuck first and then talk it out.”

“I don't want you to ever touch me again.” You were enraged at how he continued to neglect everything else in favor of only wanting to fuck you and added, “I mean it.”

Ben said, “I know you don't mean this,” as he approached you with confidence. “You and I both have the same desires for this. We both want each other so badly. The way your body reacts to me even now makes it very clear to me.”

You glared at him angrily and ignored his idiotic, enormous ego, saying, “I don't want you in my life ever again.”

He touched your arms and asked, his voice annoyed, “Why have you suddenly gotten angry?”

Observing his continued blindness to you, you sighed. Though it didn't seem to be as essential as you anticipated for him, you hoped that at least he talked about all that happened. But he was the same selfish man who acted like he cared about you, then betrayed you and hurt you. There was no need to make your hopes up.

You said with an irritated tone, “I can't believe I'm so blind when it comes to you. You don't even care how much you cause me pain in every way possible, and all you want is to have fun. Am I just a fucking toy for you to play with as you like it?”

Ben abruptly interrupted you, saying in a serious tone, “Of course not,” as his powerful arms moved slowly over your shoulders. “I want to discuss and work out everything that went wrong between us. I simply..missed you so much.”

Even though you wanted to believe his sincerity, you felt nothing at all moved by it. It was difficult for you to believe him at all since he had so many lies to tell you and so much sorrow in his words. It was difficult for you to remember the joyful emotions you had for him in the past, but though you tried to recall the wonderful times you had together, they felt like memories belonging to someone else now. Something had died in your heart for him.

You softly pulled his hands off your arms and murmured in a solemn tone, “I wish I could believe you, but I don't.”

His voice was low as he questioned, “What do you mean?”

With a heavy heart, you stated, “Everything that happened between us is in the past. It is no longer there. You only want me by your side now because I was faithful to you the day I came to help you, even though you have really hurt me.”

Although it was difficult to acknowledge his selfishness, it was best to face the facts straight away and prevent him from hurting or abusing you in the future.

“It's not like that,” Ben cut you off right away in a harsh voice.

He felt confused, not knowing how to convince you of his seriousness. You were right to hold such low expectations of him; he would not deny it, but he also understood that nothing would change if you hadn't been there to save him that day.

You said, “I'm tired, Ben,” indicating that you didn't want to talk about it more. “I really need to sleep.”

He let it go and sighed, realizing you weren't all that keen on talking at the moment. After all, this was your first day in the modern world, so it was understandable that you were a little lost.

Ben muttered, “Okay, but this isn't the end. We'll discuss it afterwards. For now, you take a rest.”

As he watched you turn your back on him and slip under the sheets, you remained silent. Ben began removing his supe suit with a growl. The way you felt excited and moist at his slight touch told him you didn't mean any of it. He knew that you were nonetheless deeply in love with him. Every part of his body

felt the presence of it. However, he realized that before he fucked you, he had to convince you that he cared about you.

He went into the bathroom, growling angrily as he felt his bulge kicking his suit. Ben could finally touch himself because you were safe now. Knowing that you would find out what he was doing in the bathroom caused his lips to twist into a smile.

You tried to fall asleep, shifting on the bed to a more comfortable position as you heard Ben turn on the water. But as soon as you closed your eyes, you heard him growling low as he stroked himself under the water. He was touching himself furiously because he knew you would hear anything he was doing, even if you weren't trying to listen.

Ben was moaning your name and moving faster as you cursed your supe hearing. As you moved into the bed, your cheeks flushed, yet you kept quiet.

Ben noticed that you were pressing your legs together as though your body were trying to find relief, so he growled and beat his cock more.

Feeling closer, he passionately exclaimed, “Fucking touch yourself. I fucking missed you and your little pussy so much.”

As he continued to talk dirty about how hard he would fuck and how many times he would come inside of you if you let him, your cheeks grew red, and you finally muttered, “Stop it.”

He trembled and whispered while wet sounds filled the bathroom, “Almost there, sweetheart,” as if hearing your voice were to give him pleasure.

Ben groaned and began to cum while murmuring your name. Your walls were tightening around nothing, and even though your body was screaming for you to touch yourself, you ignored the aching between your legs as he kept spilling his thick white ropes in between his powerful strokes that filled the bathroom. It took him long to empty his heavy balls. It was only when he let out a satisfied moan that you realized you were holding your breath.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿

Ben knew you still cared and desired him as much as he did, and he would fucking do everything to show to you that you and he were meant to be together.

Next Chapter

A/N: Comments and reblogs are very appreciated! -`♡´-

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Let me know if you want to be tagged for this series. -`♡´-

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justmeinadaze · 2 years

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I'm In Control Part 16 (Steddie X You)

A/N: Please forgive me if this comes out incoherent for I have yet to sleep. My anxiety and brain are all over the place. BUT... this chapter is based on a request I got for Good Neighbors but of course I couldn't use it there because this dynamic and their dynamic are completely different. I also included some personal things I am dealing with right now so (probably why I can't sleep lol)

I love you guys and I hope y'all are doing ok!

Warnings: The reader makes a request for the boys to be rougher to an extent they aren't really comfortable with. There is an incident where they try so some degradation, hair pulling, name calling (whore, stupid, slut), handcuffs are used, spanking, bruising. The safe word is used by the reader. The reader is dealing with some trauma in regards to her parents who are (as stated in past chapters) very religious. The boys talk with her about it as well as why she felt the need to use the safe word. I think that's everything.

Word Count: 4290

“No.” Steve folded his arms as he leaned back in his chair at their dining room table.

“What? Why? Isn’t this what you dominate types live for?”, you scowl.

“No. I live to make you cum not hurt you for gratification. That’s a whole different thing, honey. You and I both know that doesn’t get you off.”

“Don’t call me honey.”

“Hm. Someone is sassy today.” Eddie gets up and tosses his empty bowl in the sink before coming to lean against the counter beside you. “I know it’s been a while and a lot has changed since we’ve had this discussion but the rules are still the same. You don’t get to make demands.”

“But”, Steve continues. “We can take it under consideration if you explain why you want this.”

“I shouldn’t have to explain anything! I just want you guys to be rough with me. Fucking use me, degrade me, bruise me. I don’t fucking care!”

“Well, then you can go to your favorite dominatrix for that.”, he winks.

You growl under your breath as you jump off their counter and stomp out the front door.

“Somethings wrong.” Steve exhales as he comes up besides Eddie.

“You think? Whatever it is she seems to think this will make her feel better. I don’t think she fully knows what she’s asking for.”

“Of course, she doesn’t. But I guarantee you, if I know that brat, she’s going to push us until we show her.”

#################

The next few days your attitude didn’t get any better. You were extremely short with everyone and fuming any chance you could. The boys let it go, keeping note of your demeanor and tone. You continued to make your request and they continued to ignore it…until they couldn’t.

Steve barged into your office startling Avery who was talking with you.

“Out. Now.”

The boy didn’t need to be told twice. “I’ll, um, see you tonight, Y/N. You-you guys should come to.”, he stuttered. “We’re going to Fantasy again.”

“Aw, thank you, Av. We’ll think about it, ok? Alright. Bye.” Eddie lightly pushed him into the hallway and shut the door.

“Come here.” Steve beckons to you as he points in front of him.

“Fuck you.”

The man strides to your side of the desk and you let out a small yelp as he grabs your hair, pulling you to a standing position.

“Maybe it’s been too long since we’ve reminded you who is control here, little girl. When I tell you to do something, you do it.”

“Yeah, maybe it has been too long because you seem to forget right now, we are in my office.”, you seethe through gritted teeth.

He turns to look at his friend whose eyes are just as wild as his own. Steve gnaws on his cheek as he thinks before pushing you roughly back and releasing you from his hold. You glare at them as they both take a seat and you do the same.

“Where were you yesterday?”, Eddie asks. “You were supposed to come over and have dinner with us.”

“I didn’t want dinner.”

“Where. Were. You?”, he repeated.

“I was at home.” You looked away but Steve saw something in your look before you could hide it.

“Why are you lying?”

“I’m NOT lying.”

“Fine. You may have been at home but you are hiding something.”

“This may surprise you, Steven but just because we are in a relationship doesn’t mean I have to tell you every little thing.”

He leans forward on his elbows as his eyes burn holes into your own. “I know what you’re trying to do and it won’t work. I don’t know what’s going on but I know that it’s fucking hypocritical for you to beg us to be more open with you yet you suddenly can’t seem to do the same.”

He had you there and your eyes fluttered as you looked away again.

“We’ll try this again. Eddie and I are inviting you over for dinner tonight. You will show up this time and we willtalk. Do you understand me?”

“Avery invited me—”

“To the club where you fucked someone else when you were pissed at us.”, Eddie cut you off.

“When you both hid your feelings and told me this was just sex!”, you growled.

“Okay. Let’s just put it this way, little one. If you don’t show up and we have to come get you… it won’t be to your liking. Do you understand?”

“Yes.”

“Yes, what?’

“Yes, Daddy.”

Without another word, they storm out of your office.

#############

You genuinely thought about following their instructions. You really did but if this was the only way for you to get what you wanted then so be it. What killed you more was that Steve was right. You were being hypocritical but you were so terrified to tell them what was really upsetting you. You had always told them you would do whatever you could to protect them and it was better to face their wrath then bring them into your chaos.

You respected their wishes to a point and stayed home instead of going out. To be honest, you didn’t even want to go out to a club without them anyway. You chugged back on the whiskey in your glass, drowning your sorrows till you crashed on the couch.

A loud knock on your front door startled you awake a little after midnight. As soon as you opened the door, a rough hand wrapped around your throat pushing you backwards.

“So I see we’re doing this the hard way.”, Steve spat as he practically carried you to the bedroom.

“I’m surprised she’s home so early.”, Eddie snickered. “Or did you get what you wanted pretty quickly, princess?”

You were thrown onto the ground and you clung to your neck as you gasped for air. “I-I-I didn’t…go.”

“Bullshit.”

“I-I-I sw-swear, St-st-Steve.”

He bent down on his heels and reached for you hair. “No, little girl. We are in MY office now. Who are you speaking to?” You claw at his wrist as he tugs back harder. “Answer me!”

“Daddy!”

Steve turned to Eddie, clapping his hands and the metalhead tossed him the handcuffs you guys had bought at the sex shop. He roughly pulled you to your feet and threw you to the bed as Eddie came over to help him remove your clothes.

You kicked at him with your feet while you tried to push at Steve with your fists. Eddie’s fingers pinched your cheeks, forcing your lips to pout out. “Stop fucking moving. Remember, you wanted this. ‘Use me. Degrade me. Bruise me.’”, he mimics your voice in an obnoxious high-pitched tone. “Do you know how stupid WE felt waiting for you tonight?”

“Searching that fucking club for you.”, Steve followed as he clicked the handcuffs around your wrists, chaining you to your headboard. “Thinking maybe you had left with some asshole like the fucking slut you are.”

They stood up from the bed, leaving you there, naked and helpless while they took off their own clothes. Steve’s eyes met yours for a second and you quickly looked away. “No, no little girl. Look at me.”

You pouted as you continued to look at the wall. The bed shifted as you felt his skin brush against yours before he suddenly twisted your hips and spanked your ass hard with his palm.

“Every time I have to repeat myself it’s just going to get worse. I said look at me!” You did as he asked but your eyes were full of determined fire. “You better control that attitude.”, he snarled.

“Now, sweetheart, it’s been a while since Daddy and I have had to do something like this but I imagine it’s like riding a bike.”, Eddie chuckled as his hand came down on your ass. You felt their hands hold open your legs and the sudden intrusion of his fingers in your cunt made you cry out.

“Where were you?”

“Here!”

Steve spanked you after you answered and the sting reverberated through your body.

“See, princess, you gave us that excuse last time and Daddy caught you in a lie.”

“No! He said I was hiding something.”

*SMACK*

“Did I ask you another fucking question?!”, Eddie shouted and Steve hit you again. The metalhead curled his fingers inside of you and you whimpered at the feeling. “Stupid whore. Did you hear that, Daddy? She said that with confidence like it’s any fucking better.”

You started to moan as you felt the coil tighten before Eddie abruptly removed his digits and smacked his palm against your pussy. “Did you seriously think after the way you’ve been acting we would let you cum?”

The did that tandem for what felt like ages. Eddie would build you up while Steve would hit your behind. Tears began to streak your cheeks but they didn’t care as they snickered and mocked you.

“Aw. Little girl can dish it out but can’t seem to take it.” Eddie toyed with you as he shoved his fingers back in your now dripping aching hole.

You suddenly felt a warm breath by your ear. “You wanted this. How does it feel? Is it everything you thought about when you were ignoring us?” Steve’s tone killed you. You hated hurting them. That wasn’t who you were.

“I’m…I’m sorry, Daddy.”

“Yeah, whatever. You don’t fucking care.”

“I-I-I do. That’s w-w-why—fuck—” The coil that had begun winding again and was about to snap but this time Eddie didn’t remove his fingers.

“You better not fucking cum. You’re not allowed to, sweetheart.”

You screamed doing everything in your power to not cum but it was hopeless. Your body trembled as your pussy clenched around his digits and the coil snapped. Eddie’s hand came down between your legs and you screamed again as you cried harder.

“RED! Red, fucking God damn it. Red!”

Their hands immediately released your thighs as Steve reached up to unlock the handcuffs as quick as he could. You felt Eddie jump off the bed as his feet slammed against your floors.

“Ow. Ow.”, you cried as Steve guided your arms down from above you.

“Eddie! Bath!”, he shouted.

“Got it! It’s ready when you are.”

You whimpered in pain as he rose to his feet and tried to lift you in his arms. “No. Daddy. Please, no.”

“I know, honey. I know it hurts. This is going to help. I promise.” He held you like a baby and slowly shuffled with you towards your bathroom.

“You got her?”, Eddie asked; his voice shaking.

“Yeah, Ed, I got her.”, he whispered.

Steve climbed into your tub, sinking down into the warm water with you still glued to him. He had no idea how to place you in the bath without shifting you too much and didn’t want to put you in anymore pain then you were already in. You started to cry again, really letting go.

“It’s ok, baby. Everything is ok.” You babbled something he couldn’t understand. “Y/N, take a deep breath and talk whenever you’re ready, ok?”

“I said…I swear…I didn’t…go to that…club.”, you hiccupped. “I really have…been home.”

“Y/N, do you remember how you felt, sweetheart, when I wouldn’t talk to you about my dad or my past?” You nodded as Eddie’s fingertips gently traced down your arm. “That’s kind of how we feel right now, baby.”

“What were you going to say?”, Steve asked. “You said you do care that’s why… Why what?”

“…Why I’m…hiding something…from you. I have to protect you.”

“’Hurt me. Not them.’” Eddie echoed your words from your nightmare when you three stayed in the hotel in Hawkins. His eyes meet his friends. “Explains why she kept asking for this.”, he gestures towards your curled up frame.

“I still don’t understand. Honey, no one’s here to hurt us. There’s no one or nothing to protect us from.”

Your hands shake as you lift your arms, pointing towards your room. “Eddie, baby, my phone is on the coffee table…”

He rises to his feet, disappearing for a moment before returning with your device. As you swipe at the screen Steve notices you have a bunch of missed calls not just from them but from an out of state number as well. You open your voicemail and press the last message, letting it play aloud.

“Y/N! You need to answer this phone right now! I knew living in that sinful city would rub off on you! And you dragged your brother down with you. You should be ashamed! You were raised better than this, you stupid girl! *Inhales, exhales* This is the last message I am leaving. Come home right now or else I will cut you off. Your father and I will no longer have a daughter! Do you understand me?!”

“Jesus, when did Steve’s dad turn into a woman?”

That genuinely made you laugh as you started to cry again. Steve pressed your head to his chest, holding you as tightly as he could.

#################

When you opened your eyes that following morning, everything hurt. Not just from playing but after finally letting them hear the message from your mom, it was like everything you had been holding on to inside let go. You were exhausted.

As you tried to roll over you realized Steve’s arm was wrapped around your waist. Eddie had fallen asleep across from you with his arm slung over his head. When you slowly reached over to move some of his hair back, his eyes immediately shot open.

“I’m here! What’s going on? You okay, baby? What do you need?”

“Shhhh. I’m okay. I just wanted to touch you.”

He sighed as he rubbed his eyes with his hands. It had begun to storm outside so there was no sun to burn his retinas at this early hour.

“Are you hungry?”, he asked. When you nodded, he reached over and carefully moved Steve’s arm out of the way before coming around to pick you up. He paused as he entered your kitchen. “Do you want to sit on the couch or I can put a pillow on the counter?”

“I can sit on the counter. It doesn’t hurt as bad anymore.” You watch his face as he softly smiled and gently place you down. “You two really don’t like doing this stuff, do you?”

His long hair moved from side to side as he shook his head. “Like Steve said, we don’t like to hurt for gratification. You know our normal punishments aren’t like that. Some people enjoy that stuff but…”

“I’m sorry.”, you whisper as you look down at your feet. Eddie’s profile comes into view as his hand glides up your bare leg.

“Look at me, princess. You have no reason to be sorry. We’re still…learning each other. I just wish we had known what you were going through. Steve and I would have doubled down on the no we gave you the other day.” He kissed your forehead before focusing on the breakfast he was preparing.

“I smell French toast.” Steve shuffles into the room as he yawns, stopping to run his fingers through your hair. “Are you okay?” He smiles when you nod as he pulls up one of the stools by your counter and sits near you. Raising your foot, you place it on his jeaned knee. Steve grins again as he absently rubs your calf with his hand.

You two sat there silently as you watched Eddie move around your kitchen. It was cute watching his tongue poke out as he focused on the stove in front him.

“Who taught you how to make these?”, you ask.

“My mother.” His answer surprises you. “On one of her few good days. I woke up and found her in the kitchen putting everything together. She placed me on the counter like you are and I watched her while she made them. Occasionally she would stop and give a pointer. Definitely one of the best meals I’ve ever had.”

He beams at you before turning to grab your plates. Steve takes his queue, lifting you off the counter and brought you back to your bed. Eddie appears a few seconds after, handing you your breakfast. You smile at him after taking bite.

“This is amazing, Eddie.”

“Thank you, sweetheart.” You giggle as he shoves a fork full food into his mouth.

After you three finish eating, Steve takes your plates to the sink and you hear him washing the dishes. When he comes back, he has an ice pack in his hand.

“Let me see your wrists, Y/N.”

You present them to him and he holds them together as he places the pack down against the bruises that had formed from you pulling on the cuffs. You jumped at the sound of your phone vibrating and Eddie leaned over to grab it, flashing you the screen.

“That’s my brother. I’ll call him back tomorrow. I…I can’t right now…”

“That’s ok, little miss. You don’t have to talk to anyone you don’t want to.” You glance up at Steve’s soft, smiling face and turn to see Eddie’s look the same.

“My brother travels for work. A few days ago, he was close to my hometown so he went to visit my parents. Apparently, he went to the bathroom and left his phone on the table. My dad opened it and read my texts…talking about my job…”

“I guess that’s on brand for your parents.”, Eddie sighs.

“I don’t know what to do.”, you murmur. “I thought about going up there and doing whatever sin washing they want and just coming back, continuing like normal but… I don’t want to. I…that voicemail is just a taste of what its like. Plus, I know if I go you two are going to insist on going with me—”

“And why is that a bad thing?”

“Because I know you.” You chuckle through the tears that start to fall again. “You two will try to defend me which will make them angrier. They are probably already going to rude to Eddie and not just them but the entire town with his tattoos and leather jacket. You already went through that growing up. I’m not…I’m NOT allowing you to go through that again.”

Eddie’s fingers reach over and brush your hair behind your ear so he can see your face. “Well, first off, you’re right. We would defend the hell out of you. I don’t know about Stevie but I’m not going to let anyone disrespect you. I don’t care who they are. Secondly, and I’m aware how cliché this is going to sound but…”

You smile as he playfully rolls his eyes and Steve laughs next to you. “I would walk through fire for you, princess. Especially if that meant keeping you safe.”

“I agree. Remember, honey, you’re not doing this alone. I’m here to and I’m not going to let anyone disrespect Munson either.”

“Aw, thanks, man.” They gleefully grin at each other.

You wince slightly as Steve leans over to throw the ice pack onto your bedside table. “Shit. I’m sorry, baby.”

“No, no it’s okay. It’s mostly my ass more than anything.”, you giggle as you keen into his chest. “The bath really did help, Daddy.”

A long exhale leaves him at the sound of your tiny voice against his skin. “Was that…was that what made you shout the safe word? D-D-Did we hit you too hard?”

Hearing him stumble over his words killed you. Their goal when you played was to make sure you were comfortable and enjoyed what they were doing. If they had it their way the safe word was a precaution you would never have to use.

“No… timing.” Steve flashes you a completely bewildered look. “When you two gave me the underwear and made it vibrate while I was dancing with that asshole… and I had to watch the pain in your eyes while he put his hands on me.”, you shuddered. “I got overwhelmed and ran off.”

“While you were telling me I didn’t care last night, Sir was making me cum when I wasn’t supposed to. I got overwhelmed. It…hurt. I see you in pain and I want to make it stop but I’m supposed to be in control of something else…”

“You’re trying to take control while we’re controlling you.”, Eddie says matter a factly. “Alright, sweetheart, it seems like a talk between the three of us is long overdue.” He stretches out his body, laying his head in your lap. “I agree in the first scenario we crossed a line. Our emotions got the better of us and we made it harder for you. We should have let you take the reins there.”

“Last night… we didn’t know what was going on with you. I told you if we did, we wouldn’t have—”

“I feel like we still let our emotions get the better of us.”, Steve cut in.

“No. You were trying to give me what I asked for. I pushed you. He’s right. I should have been clear and open. I ask that from you and you both have done so well opening up to me. It’s not fair for me to hide it from you, no matter what my motives are.”

“I think what you struggle with, princess, is knowing when to let go of your control. You can’t control everything.” Eddie sits up and turns to give you his full attention. “Nothing bad is going to happen if you let go. I feel like… after our fuck up…we’ve shown you that you can trust us. That you are safe with us.”

“We won’t let anything bad happen.”, Steve continues.

“I know…I just… want you to feel like that to.”

“What makes you think we don’t?”, the metalhead smiles when you shrug. “Ah. Your beautiful brain is telling you lies, little one.”

“When we first met, you insisted on making us feel comfortable. You’ve protected us against fucking cops!” Steve grins as he pulls you closer.

“You verbally murdered Trisha Jameson which is still just the sexiest fucking thing I’ve ever seen in that dress.” You giggle until your eyes meet his and you find them filled with love. “Even though you were nervous you came and stood behind me when I faced my dad.”

“You stood up for me in front of mine. No one has ever done that before.” You turned your neck to look up at him and were met with his lips. “We feel safe with you, baby girl. We wouldn’t be here if we didn’t.”

“We love you.” Eddie grins as he leans forward to capture your lips as well. “We love you as is by the way. Fuck your family trying to say your full of sin or whatever. You are perfect and if they don’t know that then…”

“Thank you. I love you to.” You felt yourself start to tear up again mostly at their love for you. No one had ever spoken to you like this and compared to how you were being shouted at these last few days, it was such a beautiful reprieve.

#################

The boys laid on your bed talking to each other as you slept soundly between them. The storm had knocked out the power so there wasn’t much they could do while they waited for you to wake up again when you were hungry lunch.

Their heads turned towards your bedside table when they heard you phone vibrate again. Eddie grabbed it and showed the screen to Steve. “It’s her brother again.”

The man sighed as he reached for the phone, answering it as he carefully got up from the mattress. “Hey. Y/N’s phone. She’s busy right now but I can help you.”

“Oh. Hey…um…I’m Matthew. I’m Y/N’s brother. Which one are you? Are you the pretty boy or the heavy metal guy?”

“I’m Steve. Is there something we can do for you, Matthew?”

“Is she really busy or is she avoiding me? I swear to God, I didn’t rat her out. I didn’t even think my father knew how to work an iPhone, let alone go through it. I tried to explain it away like she was joking or something but they’re stubborn.”

“She’s not avoiding you. She’s asleep. She’s had a rough few days.”

“I can imagine. My mom said she wanted her to come home. She’s been ranting at the walls basically since my dad has kind of shut down. Do you know if she’s coming?”

“She hasn’t decided but if she does, she won’t be alone.”

“Good. I, uh, I’m staying at a hotel right now just outside of town. If she decides to come, I’ll be here to. My parents… I don’t think they know about you two. I don’t think they snooped that far.”

Steve glanced at Eddie. “She told you about us?”

“Oh yeah, man. We talk about everything. She’s like my best friend. She doesn’t give me all the gory details but she says you guys are good to her and you make her laugh. Some girlie bullshit about the way you smell and how the other guy’s lips taste.”, he chuckles. “I don’t care about the logistics. As long as you two treat her right and my sister’s happy, I don’t care. She’s been through enough.”

“Yeah, she has… when she wakes up, I’ll tell her you called and what you said.”

“Ok. Thanks. If, um, if she doesn’t want to talk to me, I understand. Just tell her I love her and I’ll be here if she does decide to come home.”

################

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