#4n@brain

[hungryf4wn]

GUYS I MADE IT DIFKWKCKSJABSB

I CAN WEAR A SIZE 32EU (00 US)

[x33god]

I have prom in 3 days, I have graduation in 10 and I’m 95 pounds and no ass. A bully of mine is going to be there and she’s wayyy skinnier than me, I want to out do her, but I know I couldn’t… it’s supposed to be my special day…

[hungryf4wn]

lunch to celebrate the wl !!

-> 2 rice cakes (28kc4l$ each) 18g of Philadelphia balance (15.6kc4l$), 51g of cucumber (7.5kc4l$) and a tiiiiny bit of chili. Total is 79.1kc4l$ and it’s veeeeery filling!!!

[x33god]

prom is today, I lest 4 pounds and had 200 something cal today… but for something they are having Indian food at prom?? Like why??

[kittysboringworld]

4n4 was there for me when no one else was she understood me she comforted me why are they trying to take her away from me

[caligvlasaqvarivm]

Why the Alpha Timeline is the Alpha Timeline

I figured I'd make a post, since it's pretty subtle and I think it genuinely passed a lot of people by? Homestuck is made up of a lot of words, haha.

The alpha timeline is described by Doc Scratch, functionally, as "the timeline that causes LE to exist."

The path which alone has my absolute mastery is the alpha timeline, a continuum I define as that which boasts exclusive rights both to my birth and to my death, two circumstantially simultaneous events.

Aranea also gives the explanation that the alpha timeline is the one where reality is perpetuated.

AG: Reality itself is using you and many others to propagate its own existence. Strictly speaking, there is only one path to its successful propagation. 8ut it still permits you to make choices.

Caliborn also states that his quest as a Lord of Time is coming to terms with the inevitability that everything, ever, in all of time, will be because of him - that he'll be the one to shape it, including the circumstances of his own defeat.

uu: AS A LORD OF TIME. I THINK I'M GOING TO MASTER TIME. NOT WITH MY BRAIN. WHICH WOULD BE TOO HARD. BUT WITH MY INSTINCTS. uu: LIKE IN A WAY THAT WORKS WITH MY NATURAL IMPULSES. SUCH AS MY AMBITION. MY WILL TO COMMIT MAYHEM. MY DESIRE TO PUNISH THOSE I DESPISE. uu: SO IF I WANT YOU TO BECOME STRONG. SO YOU CAN CHALLENGE ME LATER. AND I SEE EVIDENCE. THAT YOU PROBABLY BECOME SUCCESSFUL. uu: I THINK TO MYSELF. WHY SHOULDN'T I BE THE ONE TO MAKE THAT HAPPEN? IF IT'S GOING TO ANYWAY. uu: I THINK PART OF MY PERSONAL QUEST. IS TO BECOME AT EASE WITH THE FORCES OF INEVITABILITY. uu: INEVITABILITY THAT ALL THINGS SHOULD AND WILL FALL IN MY FAVOR. THAT ALL CAUSALITY ANSWERS TO ME. AND THAT ALL OUTCOMES NOT ONLY SERVE ME. BUT CONSIST OF MY BEING. uu: SO I FEEL THAT. THE MORE I GROW IN POWER. uu: THE MORE STUFF IT SHOULD TURN OUT I AM RESPONSIBLE FOR. uu: UP TO AND INCLUDING. EVERYTHING THAT EVER HAPPENS. uu: EVEN IF IT HAS TO BE. uu: RETROACTIVELY.

Aradia's stint as stewardess of the afterlife is explicitly described as "service to the lord of double death," and Dave explains that he acts instinctively - like Caliborn does - to fulfill the conditions of the alpha timeline. It's also worth noting that their classes, Maid and Knight, are roles that directly serve a Lord in the real world.

TEREZI: LUCK1LY YOU M4K3 4N 4DOR4BL3 H4NDM41D TO TH3 M4ST3R OF D34TH, 3SP3C14LLY 1N YOUR CUT3 CH3RRY P1X13 3NS3MBL3 ARADIA: you think so?

GG: well youre from the future right? GG: dont you know already if itll work? TG: yeah more or less TG: i never really studied how it went down all that closely TG: i just figured when the time came to sort it out the right thing to do would be obvious TG: like it is now TG: managing the loops is a balance of careful planning and just rolling with your in the moment decisions TG: and trusting they were the ones you were always supposed to make TG: by now im pretty used to having my intuition woven into the fabric of the alpha timeline

I'm starting with all that so I can explain that the GAME OVER timeline doesn't end when the time players disappear from it, like doomed timeline offshoots normally do, because it IS the alpha timeline: the sequence of events that causes GAME OVER to occur is the sequence of events that Caliborn/Lord English have chosen: one where (nearly) everyone dies, all hope of victory is lost, and his servant, the Condesce, gets to claim the Ultimate Reward, perpetuating the same misery and oppression in the new universe, and presumably all universes to come.

We see from Caliborn's chess match with Calliope that his (and by extension, LE)'s modus operandi is to follow the rules to the letter, while manipulating his opponent, tricking them with "shitty twists". It's always been explained that LE's actions have been "sanctioned by paradox space," that is, everything he's doing is explicitly allowed, nothing he's doing is against the rules - including the fact that he must be defeated. He has, via his mastery of time, perfectly engineered a situation where the only viable reality is the one where yes, he IS defeated... in the dream bubbles, by the dead and doomed, whom he sent to the dream bubbles in the first place via Condy, Jack English, and all the other boss fights. And his will, his ideals, are imposed on the new universe in spite of his defeat.

In a completely Watsonian read of the text, Lord English is an incredible villain because - subtly and unsublty - he IS basically responsible for every bad thing that ever happens, ever, to everyone. He has legitimately been the puppetmaster pulling the strings the entire time, pretty much all because Caliborn is a huge asshole who loves to hurt other people, and wants to do it as much as he can, to as many people as he can, for as long as he can.

But I think he's especially interesting through a Doylist perspective, through a reading of the text as a coming of age. Homestuck is a worth riddled with theme and symbolism, and thematically, Lord English represents everything that these kids need to overcome in order to mature into kind, empathetic adults who will be one day responsible for the care and oversight of a new universe. He represents selfishness, sadism, greed, destruction, oppression, fascism, murder, genocide, and hatred. And also literally the patriarchy.

And, you know what? Don't take my word for it. Here's Andrew Hussie's commentary from Book 6 Act 5 Act 2 Part 2:

Much of the logic [for who contributes to Lord English] orbits around these negative traits associated with men, or more specifically, the “toxically masculine” aspects often linked to certain male personalities. Dirk has a lot of these traits, which are central to Dave’s feelings of tension and abuse concerning his bro. The intellectual aggression, the power of assertion, the knowitall-ism, the mansplaining. That’s a lot of Dirk stuff when he’s at his worst. Equius shares a lot of those traits too, with some different points of emphasis. Both of them have this creepy-guy streak running through them, with strange or offputting interests, and seem to get a quiet kick out of making others uncomfortable through demonstrations of these fascinations. They are actually pretty similar characters in this way.

He's invited into the trolls' universe (and, by extension, the kids' universe) via the Dancestors, in an original sin kind of way. I'll let Hussie explain on their Formspring (emphasis mine):

We learn more about the troll race, as a once peaceful species and such before kid-ancestors as players scratched their session, though the short term relevance of this is mainly as a preamble to Scratch's religious story. Establishing an Eden-like paradise from which there is some departure through sin is sort of the boilerplate basis for religious lore. ... The failed players from peaceful Alternia made a classic "deal with the devil" move by causing the scratch after being given a choice by the mother of all monsters. (Echidna. Hey, she's a big snake!) By doing so they brought Scratch into their universe, and therefore all the things you'd expect that comes with summoning the devil.

The Dancestor's "departure through sin"? It was the fact that they couldn't get their shit together and grew up inside the Medium. That's why they're the age they are, 9 sweeps - adulthood by troll standards. They aren't kids anymore because that's the ultimate sign of having failed to do a coming of age. Symbolically, the Dancestors represent a prior generation of grown-ups that fucked everything up, leaving a huge mess for their descendents to clean up after. In fact, Doc Scratch even describes the alternate choice Echidna gave them:

The heroes could either accept their defeat along with the extinction of their race, and put no others at risk.

In other words, they could have stopped LE if they'd simply chosen not to Scratch. But once more, in line with their behavior up until that point, they chose the selfish option, and bore descendants into the world they ruined. They're immature, nasty, mean-spirited, cruel, callous, and shallow on purpose, because their role in the story is antagonistic. They're aligned (even if unwittingly) with Lord English, as they're the ones who directly invited him in via their failure to grow the fuck up.

There's also a reason why SBURB/SGRUB directly tie achieving godhood and reaching the Ultimate Reward to planetary quests fundamentally designed to help children mature. God-tiering is supposed to come at the end of one's quest, as achieving it directly teleports you to the Battlefield for the final boss.

AG: I really think how successfully they mature is tied to success in the game. It challenges the players in all the ways they need to 8e challenged to grow, which is different for every individual, and veeeeeeeery different for every race. AG: I don't think we were so hot at that aspect of the game. In fact, I'm sure we were quite awful. Hell, even I wasn't that gr8 at it! I actually just kinda fell ass 8ackwards into the god tier, to 8e honest.

And there's a perfectly functional Watsonian explanation for this - in order to increase the odds that the new universe will successfully propagate new universes, it's ideal to leave it in the hands of kind, mature people. But the Doylist explanation is, again, even more interesting.

Hussie has spoken extensively about the comic having always been about two things at its core: first, a creation myth... and second, a coming-of-age. These are complimentary themes, as Homestuck also makes statements about society and its effects on kids. In the real world, the kids of today become the voters, revolutionaries, and lawmakers of tomorrow. In Homestuck, they create, and are responsible for, a new universe.

I always saw HS as an exploration of young people developing relationships over the internet […] There’s a lot more to HS than just that obviously, but if there’s anything which it’s been about through and through, it’s modern kids relating to each other from afar, developing as people and growing up.

In fact, all the initial kids' entry artifacts are metaphors for "departures, loss of innocence, and sometimes the journey from childhood to adulthood outright." John biting an apple, symbolizing the act that cast Adam and Even from Eden. Rose breaking a bottle, the act of christening a boat, and an item integral to the main means by which she relates to her mother, alcohol - an adult substance. Dave hatching an egg, literally the act of bringing new life into the world. Jade shooting an effigy of her dog, both symbolic of Old Yeller, and of breaking a pinata, an act often done at quinceneras.

There comes a point in childhood where the child stops being a child - the safe, familiar, comfortable world that they knew stops existing, and they can never get it back. They are thrust into a world that is alien and massive, and forced to grapple with the weight of their future duties. They deal with losing their guardians and finding direction in their absence. They must decide how they want to grow up, and then are responsible for shaping the society that comes after them. In other words, SBURB/SGRUB in this metaphor represent adolescence.

Within that context, God-tiering is actually interesting because it symbolizes adulthood - a semi-permanent state that a child is supposed to reach at the end of their SBURB/SGRUB journey. And, in fact, it's treated that way - none of the characters reach god-tiering the "proper" way... and of our god-tiered characters, nearly all of them have some sort of emotional struggle with growing up too fast. Vriska with the expectations of her shitty society, Rose with her emulation of her mother, Dave with his abusive brother, and the Alpha kids with substance abuse (the jujus) and romantic drama.

Anyway, sometimes when Mario's running sideways he gets a star that makes him magic and invincible. OH. YOU MEAN HE BECOMES TRICKSTER MARIO. Yes, but less stupid. So for a while he becomes flashy and hyperactive and nothing's challenging anymore. He just starts barreling over mushrooms and leaping over pits as fast as he can, then gets to the end and jumps on the flagpole and that's it. Mario "wins". But the point is, he didn't really win. That magic star was actually devastating to his development as a human being. WHY. Because he skipped over many critical trials on his spiritual journey. Mario NEEDS to stomp on all those mushrooms. He NEEDS to bonk those bricks with his head, for the sake of his personal growth. By using the star, he is denying himself many powerful moments of catharsis.

Like... I dunno... seems pretty blatant to me!

So with Homestuck so firmly being a coming of age, and with the Dancestors - whose primary failure is that of unrelenting immaturity - being cast in an antagonistic role, doesn't that make Caliborn's position of ultimate final boss extremely fitting when we take this conversation into account?

You may be destined for bigger things, but you’re still an atrocious, stupid child. And you may have won the “game” with your sister, but that doesn’t mean it was the best thing for your development as a person. You had her dream self killed, which is not an opportunity your species typically gets. So she died prematurely, instead of allowing the conflict within you to settle itself naturally. In short, you forced your predomination to happen a little too early, and now you’re stuck. STUCK? Yes. Your personality is stuck in some sort of cantankerous prepubescent limbo. You are going to be a stunted, miserable tool forever.

He's literally a child who chose to stunt his own growth so that he could reap all the game's rewards for himself. Someone who so stubbornly desired the selfish, greedy, and immature option that he was willing to hurt himself to achieve it. Caliborn - and by extension, Lord English - is a direct symbol for the refusal to mature, to be kind, to care about other people. By including Dirk, Gamzee, and Equius at their worst, he also comes to represent misogyny, toxic masculinity, the patriarchy. He's the Condesce's master, and so by extension, he represents fascism and oppression; as Doc Scratch, he gets off on abusing girls, and so he also represents predators and abusers. And his goal is to perpetuate himself, his ideals, what he symbolically represents, down every successive generation. Much like how these cycles of abuse and oppression seek to perpetuate themselves in the real world!

And that's why the alpha timeline, the GAME OVER timeline, is the way that it is: it's one where Lord English WINS. In Lord English's version of the story, everything is fucked up forever. He might be defeated, as is the timeline's inevitability, but his politics, his bigotry, and his ideals live on.

Except.

Our Breath player gains a power that literally unsticks him from time.

Now, personally, I don't believe that the ending we got is the one that was originally intended. I don't feel the need to elaborate upon that here, but suffice to say, given how clearly and consistently these themes are set up throughout the entire rest of the comic, it just makes sense to me that the ending we got, where characters stay dead, never finish their character development, etc. etc., is a MASSIVE tonal and thematic departure, which smacks of external pressures and influences. Everything after [S] GAME OVER is soft canon to me for this reason. But there's things that survive in it that are really really interesting, so I'll mention some.

First, the pre-retcon versions of the characters still exist, as we see from (Vriska). That means that everyone who died in GAME OVER would not necessarily have stopped mattering to the plot. I firmly believe that the original ending would've seen Lord English confronted by the GAME OVER (characters), who would also have the most karmic claim to beating Lord English's face in. This would also satisfy his whole deal of playing by the rules - he knows he HAS to be defeated, he just gets to choose the circumstances of his defeat; without realizing that John's retcon powers can rewrite a timeline, he would've set up his own death to be in the bubbles, at the hands of the already-dead, while Condy claims the Ultimate Reward - thus making it so that he still wins in the end.

But Breath represents freedom, choices - and the retcon powers are something John gains mastery over after completing his personal quest, which we've established is directly tied, both literally and symbolically, into growing up and maturing. By becoming a kind, empathetic, mature adult, John is able to choose something else.

Second, that the Ultimate Self is brought up at all, which seems to me like it would mitigate the bittersweetness of the (characters) from GAME OVER staying dead - because, in my head, the original plan for the retcon was that it would bring everyone back, and therefore, all the (characters) from GAME OVER would live on through the surviving post-retcon gang, who will eventually achieve Ultimate Selfhood, as Davepetasprite^2 says they will. This would also directly mirror the words Godtier!Calliope gives to her counterpart:

CALLIOPE: bUt then... CALLIOPE: what shoUld i do? CALLIOPE: you don't need to do anything. CALLIOPE: be who you've become, and who i didn't. CALLIOPE: consume the fruits of an existence i could never understand. CALLIOPE: live.

Third, there's just so many outstanding plot threads, even for the characters that DO survive. Jake's prophesized to defeat Lord English, Dave never actually gets over his hesitance about time travel and defeating Lord English, Karkat has multiple means of bringing his dead friends back to life and doesn't say anything, Vriska and Terezi still aren't 100% reconciled, Gamzee's tragedy is never addressed, Jane, Dirk, Jake, and Roxy never really figure out their situationship, etc. etc. etc. ... to say nothing about all the plot threads left dangling for the characters that stay dead.

And finally...

Isn't that just kind of a better story? One where the kids get to grow, change, learn from their mistakes, and create a better, kinder universe, after defeating the avatars of cruelty, oppression, and immaturity?

Is it just me? Haha.

[uitzinnigmp3]

so. which unreal unearth songs do i put on this.

for the fans (aka @foundfutures) heres my ineffable husbands hozier playlist <3 if u agree / disagree w me or think i missed something pls tell me in the comments id love to talk to ppl about this 💗

(cover art by the wonderful @mistysblueboxstuff ! 💞)

[glitchy-across-aus]

Vanished

Tyler one shot, 686 words

You ever get a flashback of some random argument that never happened but you feel like it did? Sorry, that's probably hella specific but you know what I mean. Anyways, I was digging through some of my stuff when I found this weird ass script, with a picture of a TV wearing a bow tie on it. Thinking about it now, I probably should've told someone about it, 3 or 4 maybe. But I didn't. Mainly because I just didn't think it was important. Its not like it had a name on it or anything, just a picture. Anyways, I opened it and all it had was a script. Well, not a script exactly, more like a part of a story? I don't know, but this is what it said:

"That’s exactly it! I can’t deal with this boring game anymore. I just want to break out of this stuffy studio where everything feels like it’s on some weird script. It’s driving me crazy! I’m so ready to get outside and see what the real world is like—breathe real air, you know? I want to hang out at a real mall, surrounded by actual people, not just actors pretending. I want to feel real grass under my feet, touch something that isn’t fake. I’m so tired of this endless show, Evelyn. Is it too much to ask to know what life is like without cameras always watching? Is it wrong to want to experience true freedom and all the crazy, unpredictable stuff out there? I can’t keep pretending this is okay. I need more! Can’t you see that?" 

Evelyn stood there, listening to Tyler's ranting about wanting to leave for what seemed like the millionth time. "Seriously? You think you’re the only one stuck here? Everyone feels trapped sometimes. This is how it is—this is what we signed up for. You can't just bail because it’s getting boring. What do you expect, a fairy tale? The real world is messy and complicated, and you’d miss this once it’s gone. You think walking in a mall is gonna solve everything? Newsflash: it won’t. You’re just chasing a fantasy, and it’s honestly exhausting to hear you whine about it. We all want more, but this is our reality right now. Just deal with it, okay?" Tyler snapped back. "No, Eve, I'm sick of it. You're the only one who wants to stay here. The only one who wants to continue this stupid "stardom". I don't care how many stars the boss gets, I'm sick of being his pawn. Sick and tired of it, Eve. And I'm sure L!1L|4n is too. She just won't say anything because she's scared of your reaction."

Evelyn's eye twitched at that. How dare she use L!1L|4n's name like that, like she actually cared. She watched as Tyler walked off, too exhausted to argue back with the stubborn girl. Evelyn had more important things to worry about, such as finding out how to get the lead role in the next production they were making. She'd get over it soon enough. And if she didn't, well… 

She had some tricks up her sleeve. 

Reading it again, I couldn't help but get this weird sense of deja vu, like I knew what this argument was about. Of course, I had no idea who Evelyn was, or what that other name is, but I saw my name perfectly clear. Did someone make this up? Or was this another memory that seemed to vanish completely from my mind? It seemed like a lot of my old memories were doing that. Just appearing in my brain, then vanishing as soon as I try to get a grip on them. Starting to wonder what the point is, you know? I mean, why even try to remember if they're just gonna disappear? Still, I can't help but wonder about that script/story thing. The logo looks familiar too. I'm sure as soon as I try to remember, the memory of where it belongs is gonna disappear. Vanish.

Just like whoever I was before the Mushroom Kingdom.

[hungryf4wn]

angelsssss

I think I’m gonna log out for a while bc my body is slowly starting to give up on me and I don’t want to play with fire.

I’ll still check my dms but I probably won’t post much anymore.

Love you all 🪽

-Nana

[cartilagecruncher]

SCREW IT im posting the STUPID ASK BLOG THING!!! [unpleasant and infected first time meetinf. oneshot. this is half joke half serious teehee.]

That's Exactly What You Are.

Kasper has been living in an apartment with his friend, who he has nicknamed Gradie, for a while now. Around 3 months to be exact. In that time, though, he has recently fallen ill and had to be given check-ups from Lampert, another friend of his. Thankfully, he's gotten better, although something's.. off. Gradie has noticed this, since Kas hasn't said anything to them at all over the past day or so. They decide to do something about it.

Gradie nervously shuffles out of the closet and near to Kasper, who was on the computer and playing a game they didn't know the name of. They tried to get his attention.

"Kas? Are you.. are you feeling okay? You do not seem to be conversing with me and I worry for you."

He looked over at them, his face full of, surprisingly, anger and shock, and he slowly stood from his gamer chair. He backed away from Gradie.

"WH4T R U D01NG 1N MY R00M????" "Whuh- it's me! Your best friend? I literally live in your closet..?" "1'm n0t 4n 1d10t, 8r0, 1k my fr13nd5!! th3y'r3 4ll 0nl1n3!! wh0 r u 4nd y r u 1n my 4p4rtm3nt!!??"

They stared at him, still utterly baffled about what he's saying. Is this a joke? Why does he sound so different? Were his eyes always pink..? They kept staring, not answering his question, so he continued to interrogate them.

"L15t3n up, 8r0, 1'm n0t 480ut 2 45k 4g41n. T3ll m3 wh0 u r 83f0r3 1 k1ck u 0ut." "I already told you, Kas, I'm your best friend!! It's Gradie!" "Uhm.. u m1ght h4v3 th3 wr0ng 4p4rtm3nt.. 1dk 4ny p30pl3 n4m3d th4t.. my n4m3'5 1nf3ct3d."

Gradie kept staring at him, unmoving. This really freaked Infected out, since they were twice his height and generally very intimidating.

"c4n u pl5 l34v3, 8r0?" "I have NOWHERE else to go!! I'm practically a begger without your apartment housing me and letting me feast!" "pff.. f345t? Wh4t 15 th15, th3 1800'5?? 5t0p 5p34k1ng 4ll f4ncy, dud3." "Fancy?? That's- That's fancy to you?? I'm simply speaking normally with you! Unless, of course, these new and barbaric speech patterns are the 'in', in which case I will possibly edit my way of speaking to-"

Infected quickly cut them off during their rant, not wanting them to keep yapping.

"Pl5 5t0p t4lk1ng. 1'll l3g1t l3t u l1v3 h3r3 1f u ju5t 5t0p." "Oh. Gladly!" "G0d, ur 50 unpl3454nt. M4y83 TH4T'5 4 83tt3r n4m3 f0r u th4n 'Gr4d13'."

Gradie stayed quiet for a moment, not wanting to break rules, but they spoke up for that.

"But- but you named me that.." "1 h0n35tly d0 n0t g1v3 4 #### wh0 n4m3d u wh4t, ur n4m3 15 Unpl3454nt n0w 83c4u53 th4t'5 3x4ctly wh4t u r. Unpl3454nt."

They didn't respond, still shocked about this whole situation, and silently walked to the closet to think over this whole situation for a while.

"Is Kasper really that bothered by my speech patterns?.. no, wait, this is 'Infected', or whatever, so Kasper may still not mind my speaking voice. What can I do to help him? He doesn't want to be my friend, and he seems to be very 'hip' and 'trendy', so maybe I should find a trendy topic to converse with them about."

It was after this moment that Unpleasant both discovered brain-rot and became a weirdo. The thing is it's all an act. They're pretending to be this way to gain friends and, especially, to make Infected like them again. The only problem is that, for some reason, everyone they meet hates them with a burning passion. Getting called a waste and a freak, being told to keep away or leave.. they didn't even do anything! It just makes them wonder, deep down.. "Where did it all go wrong?" [The end lmao!!! teehee skips away and dies]

[hungryf4wn]

saw my therapist

had a panic attack when he told me my bmi

tomorrow evening I’m seeing my crush

woo-ooh 💀

[mosstalon4]

* how does ur brain work with out formal informal singular & plural 'you' i would like to study it/hj

i dont know? how does your br4in work WITH form4l inform4l singul4r 4nd plur4l you? 4lso we sort4 h4ve 4 plur4l you but its sl4ng (its y’4ll, or 4 shortened you 4ll)

SERIOUSLY THO if there were 4n english equiv4lent you KNOW i would use it SO FUCKING OFTEN like. moss c4su4lly t4lking to 4 frisk, fully 4w4re th4t ch4r4 4nd/or the pl4yer is there too 4nd just. c4su4lly refers to them with plur4l you its even funnier if they go “nono, i know my pronouns 4re they/them, but th4ts singul4r they, not plur4l” 4nd moss just goes “oh i know ::3 i w4s t4lking to 4ll three of you” 4nd theyre 4ll just like . SHIT,

[bladekindeyewear]

HS^2 bloggin’ mainline 2020-05-31

Mainline upd8 before the June break.  More Terezi!  That should put me in a better mood. (1 edit (2020-06-01) since posting)

> CHAPTER 10. 1 WOND3R WH4T TH3Y T4ST3 L1K3

Wait, fuzzily waking up seeing the new planet?

Wait, why is the site background still black?

Wait, is this one of the new alien race members just created?

That would explain the chapter title.  (Especially if they were part plant, but Terezi would say that regardless, when you think about it.)

> ==>

Coming more into focus.

> ==>

Oh!  Back to the normal background.

TEREZI: W3LL

She’s not the one seeing this, so is this an alien perspective or does Rose’s visual processing take a while to turn back on post-warranty-breach?

> ==>

Huh?  It WAS her point of view?

So this:

--is just an attempt at rendering her smell-o-vision?

I know her sense of smell is supposed to be amazing, but this is MARKEDLY less paint-like than previous depictions of her smell-o-vision.  See for comparison:

Was this an intentional difference in clarity? Laziness? Her scent-vision being sharper?  They’re practically making us feel like her eyes are healed again, which would be disastrous, and not something even Ultimate Rose should necessarily be capable of.

(I’m inclined to give them less credit than usual today, though, so a poor visual choice most likely.)

TEREZI: TH4T W4S PR3TTY FUCK1NG STUP1D

Hate-screwing Rosebot?  Why?

I guess it’d leave you sore.

> ==>

TEREZI: F4LL1NG 4SL33P H3R3 1S JUST 4SK1NG FOR TROUBL3

Oh.  Are the new races - or their precursor “experiments” running around?

> ==>

TEREZI: NODD1NG OFF L1K3 TH4T UND3RN34TH 4N 4RBOR34L 4MBUL4TOR TEREZI: WHO KNOWS WH4T COULD H4V3 H4PP3N3D TEREZI: Y34H 4LR1GHT, 4LR1GHT TEREZI: G3T OFF MY C4S3 4BOUT 1T ALR34DY TEREZI: 1TS NOT L1K3 1 D1D 1T ON PURPOS3

Is Terezi talking to her other selves or something?  Or another brain ghost?

TEREZI: W3R3 JUST LUCKY TH3R3 1SNT 4NY W1ND 4T TH3 MOM3NT TEREZI: 1V3 3ST4BL1SH3D TH4T TH1S 1S WHY TH3Y MOV3 TEREZI: TH3 4MBUL4TORS 4R3 PL4NTS IN THE STR1CT S3NS3, BUT EXH1B1T LOCOMOT1V3 B3H4V1OUR DU3 TO TH31R UN1QU3 CONSTRUCT1ON

Ooh, moving trees.  Nice.

TEREZI: TH3 M41N BODY OF THE PL4NT CONS1STS OF A N3TWORK OF HOLLOW, TUB3LIKE GROWTHS THROUGH WH1CH 41R M4Y TR4V3L TEREZI: TH3S3 N3TWORKS 4R3 SO SOPH1ST1C4T3D TH4T TH3 SH1FT1NG PR3SSUR3 1NS1D3 TH3 TRUNK 4ND BR4NCH3S C4N C4US3 TH3 3NT1R3 PL4NT TO UPROOT 1TS3LF 4ND B3G1N "W4LK1NG", PROV1D3D TH3 COND1T1ONS 4R3 R1GHT TEREZI: TH1S PROC3SS, WH1L3 M4J3ST1C, C4N H4V3 DR4ST1C 3FF3CTS ON TH3 PL4NTS SURROUND1NGS

I know you like to eat them, but when did your analysis of plantlife get so clinical?  Do you have Aranea blabbing in your ear or something?

Oh.  OH, wait.  They have a Command Station.  Is Rose communicating with her remotely via that, and Terezi is just Dave-like vocalizing everything Rose punches into the terminal?  Then that would be Terezi arguing with HER out loud.  And the sudden transition of talk to “I’ve established that this is why they move.” is very Rose-sounding.

> ==>

That lil’ “hup” pose to jump over the gap Terezi’s making is adorable.  Also, those are bad failed experiments y’all have created and you should feel bad, Rose and Dirk.  (Rose is definitely to blame for this spider-bunny nightmare.)

TEREZI: HUP!

Hup

TEREZI: 1 WOND3R WH4T TH3Y T4ST3 L1K3 >:O

They look like they’d taste like bee spiders with inedible stuffing throughout.

Trolls do find grubs of most sorts appetizing though.

> ==>

TEREZI THOSE ARE NO REASON TO BE HAPPY

> ==>

Yeah, beautiful field-shot aside I feel pretty bad for that creation.  Looks miserable.

> ==>

Now they’re just mashing up consorts.  Are they TRYING to populate the planet with weird garbage for the final products to eat?  (Or fight? Hard-troll-childhood style?)

> ==>

THAT THING IS NO REASON TO LOOK SO HAPPY EITHER REZI

Gosh, at least she’s having fun though.

> ==>

You’re ignoring Onionsan, Terezi

> ==>

I wonder what lazy name this Horsisaur has.

Fun abandoned. Survival instincts fully engaged. Terezi runs.

She throws backward sniffs over her shoulder as she tears through the scrubby cling of the planet’s undergrowth, catching fractured impressions of exactly what has decided to chase her. A shuddering, 20 foot monstrosity that somehow seems to both scamper and glide, like a centipede, rustling like foliage as it moves, as if an entire goddamn forest is bearing down on her.

Between the game and Alternia, you shouldn’t be TOO rusty at this, right?

The problem with using smells to navigate the world is that the unfamiliar can be difficult to parse. Every whiff over her shoulder gives her another blurry glimpse of what this beast is.

Yeah, smell is a little slower on the pickup than sight.

Rose shared her books with Terezi when she was on the ship, and her favorite by far was the compendium of the zoologically dubious. Everything contained inside was just so unbelievably unlikely. This creature appears to be a combination of all of them.

Really? What we see of it doesn’t look THAT weird.  But we only see about half of it from this angle, so.

--Twisted ankle?  Come on, you’re not THAT rusty.

> ==>

It’s fear, pure and simple. Unsurprising, when being menaced by a monster, but it also doesn’t last for more than a second. A cold flame that instantly burns itself out, and all of a sudden she is just deeply, impossibly, indescribably tired. Down to her bones.

You’re already giving up??!?

Honestly, she really has no right to feel this... this fatigue. This crushing embrace of endless struggle. Terezi Pyrope has not had an easy life by anyone’s standards, but so much of her thirteen or so sweeps has just been standing still. Waiting. Huddling blind and half dead in her recuperacoon, the sopor burning the hideous mess that the sun has left her eyes, alight with a hatred so layered and intense that she couldn’t make sense of it.

Dammit, do we have to go SO EXHAUSTINGLY DEEPLY into EVERY SINGLE CHARACTER’S PTSD?!??

It was horrifying--that pain or fury--but also, admittedly, very boring. Then there were the sweeps on the meteor, the endless, gelatinous stretches of time in the chaos of the outer ring, searching for... Vriska, ostensibly, but also maybe just for a chance to dry up. To disappear. Go extinct.

Terezi doesn’t know if it’s an attribute of her aspect, or the sheer psychic damage of spending so long in the company of two humans with god complexes. Maybe it’s just an inherited symptom of being conscious. But sometimes it feels like none of them are going to get out of this, alive or dead.

Fuck, apparently we are.  These writers don’t know how to let up.  Can’t we get a little more retroactive dwelling on how FUN some of their lives up til now were?  And then... maybe NOT only do that to contrast with how depressed they are now??  There was SO much delight in Homestuck amidst the hardship, and if you’re going to show us more of the hardship you have to show us more of the delight, too, or everything just gets pointlessly dark.

--ah, Rose redirected the command console to point to the monster and stopped it that way.

ROSE: I am devastated to report that those are really more vines than tentacles, and even worse, they aren’t mine.

Pff.

...Poking fun at the terminology for Patron Trolls, at this late date of all times.

TEREZI: D4V3 4ND 1 H4D 4 LOT 1N COMMON B4CK TH3N, OR 4T L34ST 1T F3LT L1K3 W3 D1D ROSE: As I have come to understand it, for a while at least, we were all being steered in the right direction by a debatably benevolent force. ROSE: One imposed on us by the game itself, even if we had yet to enter it. TEREZI: ... ROSE: You don’t believe me. TEREZI: NO, 1 DO TEREZI: 1T SOUNDS 1NCR3D1BLY DUMB AND UNL1K3LY BUT SO DO3S 3V3RYTH1NG 3LS3 TH4T H4PP3NS TO 4NY OF US

Terezi, don’t you know at least half as much about Skaia as anyone else here? Isn’t that what she’s talking about?

TEREZI: SO YOU 4R3 DO1NG TH3 S4M3 TH1NGS TO TH3S3 CR34TUR3S TH4T SOM3 OTH3R CR34TUR3S D1D TO YOU 4ND YOUR FR13NDS ROSE: I suppose that is a fair assessment. Although we were not our own creators. It was John who— DIRK: I hate to break up the recap episode, but we need to deal with this situation before it gets out of hand.

Wait, she’s talking about the Exiles?  Terezi TOLD Dave about the exiles helping them.  SHE was the one who told us how that worked!  Although I guess you could chalk her questions up to her not knowing one of those “terminals” was involved.

TEREZI: 4ND HOW 4R3 YOU H3R3 4NYW4Y? DIRK: I have administrative privileges. TEREZI: YOU H4V3 4DM1N1STR4T1V3 PR1V1L3G3S TO MY P4LMHUSK DIRK: Yes.

Was Terezi dictating to her palmhusk earlier?  Why was she talking for Rose’s part of the conversation earlier, but not now?  Was that a mistake?  Or did Rose switch off the terminal, despite her apparent confusion with the terminal now???

Opinion of HS^2... dropping... keep it together stop judging the comic so hard... NOT dropping off in quality... shh brain! Shoosh!!!

(Seriously though, don’t put ANY asks in my inbox about HS^2 dropping off in quality, even as much as I’M starting to complain.  Gotta keep my hopes up to keep enjoying myself as I keep going.)

ROSE: Don’t let it get to you. My father has a habit of appearing in places he’s not wanted.

You’re seriously just CALLING him that now?!??

DIRK: I was saying that we should get Terezi down from there before continuing our mining of the core themes in our personal narratives.

Ah, that’s why you used the terminology.

DIRK: I was saying that we should get Terezi down from there before continuing our mining of the core themes in our personal narratives. ROSE: Of course. I’ll take care of it. DIRK: Appreciate it. TEREZI: 1 W1SH YOU WOULDN’T DO TH4T WH3R3 1 C4N S33 1T DIRK: Do what? TEREZI: TH4T TH1NG WH3R3 YOU G3T P3OPL3 WHO 4R3 NOT M3 TO DO WH4T3V3R 1T 1S YOU W4NT TH3M TO TEREZI: M1ND CONTROL

Oh, damn.  That was a creepy order, then.  And is Rose STILL not wise to it?  Can Terezi and Dirk just TALK about the narrative control IN FRONT OF ROSE and have her not recognize it because of said control??? :C

TEREZI: WH4T TH3 FUCK 1S GO1NG ON DIRK: You can make more boots. TEREZI: 1M NOT T4LK1NG 4BOUT TH3 BOOTS, NOOKBR34TH TEREZI: 1 MEAN TH3 M3N4G3R13 FROM H3LL DIRK: Well, we’ve encountered a couple bumps along the road. TEREZI: YOU DONT S4Y

This is fun, but I can’t help but notice that Rose has completely stopped talking.  Fuck having Dirk flaunt this even harder just ups the creepiness even more.

TEREZI: YOU GUYS R34LLY SUCK 4T TH1S DIRK: Yeah, agreed. TEREZI: ... TEREZI: WOW, TH4T W4S MUCH L3SS P41NFUL 4ND LONG-W1ND3D TH4N 1 W4S 3XP3CT1NG 1T TO B3 DIRK: What was? TEREZI: CONV1NC1NG YOU TH4T 4LL OF TH3S3 "D3S1GNS" TH4T YOU H4V3 COM3 UP W1TH SUCK SH1T TEREZI: 1 THOUGHT YOU WOULD T3LL M3 TH4T 4LL OF 1T 1S P4RT OF SOM3 "GR4ND PL4N" TEREZI: TH4T TH3Y SUCK ON PURPOS3 OR SOM3TH1NG L1K3 TH4T DIRK: Well, it is a part of the grand plan. And they do suck on purpose. DIRK: But not on my purpose. DIRK: It’s Rose. She is remarkably bad at this. Voluntarily. TEREZI: DO YOU M34N TH4T SH3 1S TRY1NG TO S4BOT4G3 4LL OF YOUR GR4ND CR34T1ONS TEREZI: OH POW3RFUL GOD PR1NC3? DIRK: No, she’s playing the game. That part hasn’t been a problem. DIRK: I mean she is just making incredibly nonsensical decisions and refusing to back down, even when I up the ante to preposterous levels. DIRK: You should see some of the shit she’s come up with. I’m pretty sure I watched a vagina on legs walk by this morning. TEREZI: 1 DONT TH1NK 1 S4W TH4T ON3 DIRK: Despite her initial resistance, Rose has gone completely feral. TEREZI: YOU M34N TH4T SH3 1S H4V1NG FUN DIRK: Yes.

You loosened her morals so she’d be conscience-free to go full zoological playground, and she’s GOING full zoological playground.  What did you expect?

TEREZI: 4ND WH4T 1S WRONG W1TH 4 L1TTL3 B1T OF FUN YOUR H1GHN3SS? DIRK: Nothing. I got absolutely no problem with having a good time while we see to the boring and altogether completely frivolous task of seeding the future of this planet. DIRK: But she really TEREZI: YOU 3XP3CT3D H3R TO B3 TH3 ON3 TO HOLD YOU B4CK, 1NST34D OF TH3 OTH3R W4Y 4ROUND DIRK: No, that's not it. TEREZI: YES, 1 TH1NK 1T 1S 1T

What?  “Holding her back”?  How did this suddenly become about Dirk’s insecurity at his ectobiological skill?

DIRK: By project, do you mean that I expect Rose to be too much like myself? TEREZI: NO, 1 M34N TH3 OPPOS1T3 TEREZI: YOU 3XP3CT H3R TO B3 B3TT3R TH4N YOU TEREZI: YOU W4NT H3R TO PR3V3NT 4LL OF YOUR WORST T3ND3NC13S. TH3 W4Y 1 US3D TO W1TH VR1SK4 WH3N W3 W3R3 MO1R41LS

--Oh, you meant hold them back from going TOO FAR.  I see.  And also, the way Terezi and Vriska were “moirails” is the WORST example, and thus quite fitting to relate to this situation.  For their brief pale stint, Terezi never really STOPPED Vriska from doing ANYTHING. She just supported Vriska, while Vriska spewed some flattery Terezi’s way... and then proceeded to do whatever the fuck she wanted. Sometimes without telling her.  It was an AWFUL example of proper moirallegiance, as I covered in the above link.

Dirk wouldn’t know about that, though.  And neither does Terezi, apparently, unless she’s just not admitting it.

(EDIT: Also, Rose never had the slightest chance of ever holding Dirk back like she might have wanted because DIRK MIND CONTROL OVERRIDES HER EVERY TIME SHE HAS RESERVATIONS. The only way a moirallegiance can work at all is if the one being held back is WILLING to listen. Dirk has deliberately and continuously suppressed Rose's ability to even THINK about dissuading him from literally any course of action.)

TEREZI: YOUR3 3XP3CT1NG ROS3 TO C4TCH YOU WH3N YOU GO TOO F4R TEREZI: SH3 1SNT GO1NG TO DO TH4T, 1 DONT TH1NK TEREZI: 1N F4CT, 1 TH1NK SH3 1S MOR3 L1K3LY TO GO TOO F4R TH4N YOU 4R3 DIRK: What makes you say that? TEREZI: 1 DONT KNOW TEREZI: JUST 4 F33L1NG, 1 GU3SS. 1 M1GHT NOT B3 4 GOD-MODD3D DORK 1N COSPL4Y, BUT 1M ST1LL A S33R TEREZI: 4ND 1 H4VE SP3NT W4Y MOR3 T1M3 W1TH TH3 TWO OF YOU TH4N 4LMOST 4NYON3 ELSE, WH1CH 1S 1NCR3D1BLY D3PR3SS1NG TO TH1NK 4BOUT

Guh.  A real pair of villains.  Is that REALLY why you brought Rose, Dirk?

TEREZI: 4NYW4Y, 1F YOU DONT L1K3 TH3 W4Y ROS3 1S DO1NG TH1NGS WHY DONT YOU JUST NOT-M1ND CONTROL H3R 1NTO DO1NG 1T TH3 R1GHT W4Y TEREZI: PROBL3M SOLV3D DIRK: I’ve made the decision to freehand this one. I’m not planning to influence Rose’s decision in any part of the contest. Otherwise it’s too easy, and barely worth doing at all.

Obviously.  And you can’t argue her down the normal way because she was NEVER someone to listen to someone like you in a direct confrontation without any misleading subterfuge.  You would’ve had to Doc Scratch it.

DIRK: So you’re saying you want me to mind-control Rose. TEREZI: NO, 1M S4Y1NG TH4T 1 TH1NK YOU 4R3 4 COW4RD TEREZI: P3RH4PS 1 W1LL T3LL H3R TH4T YOU H4V3 B33N WH1SP3R1NG YOUR STR4NG3 L1TTL3 1NC4NT4T1ONS 1N H3R 34R OV3R TH3 L4ST F3W SW33PS TEREZI: L1K3 4 CR33PY W31RDO DIRK: No, you won’t. If you were going to, you would have already.

Are you talking about the narrative mind control or are you talking about something else?  Something weirder?  Because calling them “strange little incantations” sounds like he’s been doing some creepily Doc-Scratchy grooming to her like how Doc kinda rage-controlled the trolls to write his genetic code on their walls in their most vulnerable moments.

DIRK: Unless you think I’m still projecting my "image" of what I think Rose "should" do, and she actually won’t give a shit. TEREZI: NO, 1 TH1NK SH3 W1LL B3 CONFL1CT3D TEREZI: UNL3SS YOU M1ND-CONTROL H3R NOT TO B3 DIRK: Not mind control. TEREZI: WH4T3VER!

And that’s just it.  Rose WOULD have been very conflicted about MUCH of this if you hadn’t used your narrative control to override all her inhibitions.  So instead you get the version of her who would have gone with your plans without hesitation, which is the WORST version of her.  And she doesn’t even have a choice to be better.

Alright, that’s the end of the upd8.  See y’all!  Maybe a bit after the commentary goes up for this (already has for the Influencers bonus) I’ll cover the commentary on both this and the bonus, but that’ll be in at least a few days.  Ciao

[agbpaints]

These are kinda a thing! The various periphery states all kinda have their own preferences for what they like and build refits of.

Taurians love SLDF mechs and with the New Dallas core they end up building a lot of spins on old classics like their Griffin 4N, a rifleman with stealth armor and a targeting computer, or their jumping warhammer.

Canopus has a lot of joint projects with the Capellans, but they also build some if their own MC/MAF variants in house, as well as their Phoenix Hawk derivative, the Agrotera.

The Marians 'H' variants are generally powerfully smooth brain: steal whatever mech you can, replace the armor with ferro-fibrous, rip out some random bullshit/heat sinks, weld on as many low grade rocket tunes as possible.

Outworlds Aliance has the misfortune of being more coreward than the other periphery states and ended up getting settled by the Snow Ravens, so they're just straight up producing C and IIC mechs now, including Mountain Wolf's darling Merlin with shiny new ferro-lamelor armor

so yall kno how u got IIc variants of mechs, where the clanners were like "we've got some better tech now so why dont we improve upon some old designs or use older designs to test the new tech". well, i think there should be a periphery version, the IIp if you will, wherein its local varients built by periphery states... not necessarily under license. perhaps a jaegermech replacing its autocannons with a quartet of ppcs and stripping some armour to make it fit better. idk im just spit balling here. they wouldnt be... better, persay, they would would have their own unique charm to them

[chimericarchitect]

aestheticVirtuoso 4

-- aestheticVirtuoso [AV] began trolling talentedSalad [TS] at 20:37 --

[08:37] AV: Y+u're g4y.

[08:38] TS: You're not wrong, but why are you bringing this up right now?

[08:39] AV: N+ re4l re4s+n. Just felt like ch4tting.

[08:39] TS: Seems legit; I'd wanna talk to me too if I was lame.

[08:39] TS: You must be very bored.

[08:39] AV: But y+u 4re l4me.

[08:40] TS: Another harsh truth dropped by the master of disaster.

[08:40] AV: +h shit, here c+mes D4t B+i.

[08:41] TS: What, is it Teivel?

[08:42] AV: dfjgkfej/ghkbre hjmu+gsw4 f le /ft4piekj

[08:42] AV: 4dxscghnkl,;gr3ql+5

[08:42] TS: Oh wait. That's a meme.

[08:42] TS: Good job with the mashing, buddy

[08:42] TS: It makes more sense than your reference

[08:42] AV: My lusus is 4 dick s+metimes.

[08:43] TS: Oh shit. REAL TALK.

[08:43] TS: Whassup?

[08:43] TS: Wait.

[08:43] TS: The mashing?

[08:43] AV: He keeps pecking me. Sl4ms his he4d +n the d4mn huskt+p. I h4d t+ sh++ him 4w4y.

[08:44] TS: Holy fuck. Your lusus is such a bird brain

[08:44] TS: badum tsh!

[08:44] AV: W+w. g++d +ne.

[08:44] AV: Must h4<e t4ken y+u sweeps.

[08:45] TS: Haha. So "Dat Boi" was your lusus?

[08:45] TS: comin' to peck your shit

[08:45] AV: B4sic4lly.

[08:45] TS: Top quality lusus you have there

[08:45] TS: How much trouble is he?

[08:46] AV: He's pretty nice m+st +f the time, but he c4n get s+ s4ssy s+metimes.

[08:46] TS: Sassy?

[08:46] TS: Example required.

[08:47] AV: I d+n't kn+w, m4ybe sl4mming his d4mn he4d +n my fre4king huskt+p f+r n+ re4s+n +ther th4n t+ be 4 dick 4nd get 4ttenti+n.

[08:47] TS: Aw, he's lonely.

[08:47] TS: But here you are

[08:47] TS: also lonely

[08:47] TS: harassing losers on the internet

[08:48] TS: instead of hangin out with bird dad

[08:48] TS: Was he doing it to be a dick?

[08:48] AV: I think he gets je4l+us. He w4nts 4ll +f the 4ttenti+n.

[08:48] TS: Oh-ho, a Fussy Boi

[08:49] TS: You should post a pic of him sometime.

[08:49] AV: His fe4thers 4re 4ll ruffled.

[08:49] TS: Does he make a mess?

[08:50] AV: N+t re4lly. Whene<er he thr+ws 4 fit, he d+es s+ by pecking my d4mn br4ins +ut. +ne d4y I w+n't e<en h4<e 4ny.

[08:50] TS: Hm. One day, huh.

[08:51] TS: Let him send me a message

[08:51] TS: It's funny

[08:51] AV: Fine. I'm h4nding the huskt+p t+ him.

[08:51] TS: Holy shit

[08:51] TS: I'm ready

[08:51] AV: d/kjg4X C<

[08:51] AV: UZZHG+L=-P05

[08:51] AV: qwtijm,,mp+k+i+ipuigf

[08:52] AV: hytht<<fkyhuibgyf7uut<hty<yukilgtftyg

[08:52] AV: +h shh+it5hrtgn dw

[08:52] AV: shity

[08:52] TS: I <3 u bird dad

[08:52] TS: lol "shity"

[08:52] AV: I think he 4te 4 key

[08:52] AV: fucj

[08:52] AV: fucj

[08:52] AV: kk

[08:52] TS: I am laughing SO HARD right now

[08:52] TS: asdfg

[08:52] AV: Wh4t 4n 4ssh+le

[08:53] TS: You can get a new key

[08:53] TS: Besides

[08:53] TS: I told you too give him the husktop

[08:53] AV: I h4d t+ y4nk it b4ck fr+m him. He w4s re4lly g+ing 4t it.

[08:53] TS: You got the key back?? Impressive!

[08:54] AV: N+, the huskt+p. I'm missing my G key.

[08:55] TS: Guess you'll just have to sing a different note from now on

[08:55] TS: Try A flat

[08:55] AV: It's g+ne f+r g++d

[08:55] AV: It's s+ h4rd t+ type gs n+w

[08:55] TS: He swallowed it?

[08:55] AV: He r4n +ff.

[08:56] AV: I think he's t4kin it t+ his nest +r s+me shit.

[08:56] TS: Is he gonna hide it or eat it? I'm confused.

[08:56] AV: Pr+b4bly just hide it.

[08:56] TS: And you'll never find it

[08:56] TS: never

[08:57] AV: N+pe. I 4in't re4chin int+ th4t d4mn nest.

[08:57] AV: He'd kill me.

[08:57] TS: Reeeeeally?

[08:57] TS: You've tried before then

[08:57] AV: My p++r he4d c4n't t4ke 4nym+re peckin.

[08:58] TS: Going bald, huh

[08:58] AV: I miht h4<e 4 c+ncusi+n.

[08:58] TS: This is you

[08:58] TS: https://akibento-leadnationmedia.netdna-ssl.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/iIpmndr.jpg

[08:59] AV: Fuck +ff.

[08:59] AV: My h4ir is f4b.

[09:00] TS: Fuck off? It IS fab. It IS you tho, right? Bald, vacant stare... What'd I get wrong?

[09:01] AV: Wh4t 4n 4ssh+le.

[09:01] TS: Wait, I know

[09:01] TS: You like bananas, right?

[09:01] TS: here

[09:01] AV: N+.

[09:01] TS: fixed it

[09:01] AV: D+n't.

[09:01] TS: http://s1.narvii.com/image/mzhqe6ncv7hmtvxmqcxutwrbnnwywqrx_hq.jpg

[09:02] AV: I h+pe y+u fuckin die.

[09:02] TS: Someday, my friend

[09:02] TS: someday

[09:02] AV: F+r 4ll +f +ur s4kes, I h+pe it's s+med4y s++n.

[09:03] TS: If I take up Teivel's offer to come over, it'll probably be soon

[09:04] AV: Gr+ss.

[09:04] TS: He's aslked you over too, right?

[09:04] AV: I d+n't need t+ he4r 4b+ut th4t shit.

[09:04] TS: Dude

[09:04] TS: no

[09:04] TS: I meant he was gonna kill me on some shitty traps or something

[09:05] AV: He s4id he h4s s+me kind +f fuckin sex dune+n/res+rt

[09:05] TS: WTF

[09:05] TS: No

[09:05] TS: His hive is just a shitscape of ghey boobytraps and corpses

[09:05] TS: Unless he's into THAT

[09:05] AV: 4nd his shit lusus

[09:06] TS: Oh yeh

[09:06] TS: double ew

[09:06] AV: Th4t he s4id he's suck the bulge +f

[09:06] TS: A chameleon's bulge?

[09:06] AV: He's fuckin r+ss

[09:06] AV: Ye4h

[09:06] AV: My p++r key

[09:07] TS: That will not ever be not funny

[09:07] AV: I w+uld if I 4sk nicely en+uh he'll i<e it b4ck

[09:08] TS: Really? Huh.

[09:08] TS: Well, for now

[09:08] TS: http://s.twistynoodle.com/img/r/fill-in-the-missing-letter-g/fill-in-the-missing-letter-g-2/fill-in-the-missing-letter-g-2_coloring_page.png?ctok=20151006065412

[09:08] TS: No.3 is funny

[09:08] TS: Teivel would like it

[09:09] AV: http://www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/angry-peacock-royalty-free-image/94194414?esource=SEO_GIS_CDN_Redirect

[09:09] AV: This is wh4t this 4ssh+le l++ks like.

[09:09] TS: Your lusus is funny

[09:09] TS: "AAAAAAAAAAAA"

[09:09] TS: hehheh

[09:10] AV: http://images.china.cn/attachement/jpg/site1007/20110505/000cf1a48b7f0f2c57691e.jpg

[09:10] AV: This is wh4t he sh+uld l++k like.

[09:10] TS: Brutal

[09:11] TS: you want some freaky corpse party like Teivel

[09:11] AV: Hell n+.

[09:12] AV: http://hronika.info/uploads/posts/2016-07/1467640837_devochka.jpg

[09:12] AV: Me runnin fr+m my lusus

[09:12] TS: That's some quality garbage, my dude. ;)

[09:13] TS: How big is your lusus tho?

[09:13] AV: Bigeer th4n me.

[09:13] AV: W+w.

[09:13] AV: My spellin

[09:13] TS: Pretty ghey

[09:14] TS: Are you super small or what

[09:14] AV: N+t 4s sm4ll 4s y+ur bule

[09:15] TS: Prol'ly

[09:15] TS: But seriously

[09:15] TS: are you a shota

[09:15] TS: loli boi

[09:15] AV: Wh4t the fuck?

[09:15] TS: Are you a tiny boi

[09:16] TS: how tall are you

[09:16] AV: N+ne +f y+u're buisness.

[09:17] TS: Fair

[09:17] TS: snooty

[09:17] TS: but fair

[09:18] TS: here.

[09:18] TS: for you

[09:18] TS: https://sanesspsuede.tumblr.com/image/165713367880

[09:18] TS: perhaps there is peace now

[09:18] AV: FUCKKKKK<4L.

[09:18] AV: 4ss

[09:18] TS: You don't like it? It even has your name on it!

[09:18] AV: +h shit

[09:19] TS: what

[09:19] AV: My lusus is c+min b4ck

[09:19] AV: I c4n't let him et 4n+ther key

[09:19] TS: he's gonna No.3 your husktop

[09:19] AV: jkmm ,mk.ledl.,edkl,

[09:20] AV: N++

[09:20] TS: which one

[09:20] AV: N+ne, yet. I just left.

[09:21] AV: C4n't e<en sit in my +wn respitebl+ck.

[09:21] TS: Where will you hide?

[09:21] AV: M4ybe the f++dbl+ck.

[09:21] TS: Your lusus won't follow you?

[09:21] AV: H+pefully n+t?

[09:22] TS: https://media1.giphy.com/media/l4FsL2O7y1xgYCHNC/200_s.gif

[09:22] AV: W+w, th4nks.

[09:22] TS: I hope it helped

[09:23] TS: a blessing to keep the lusus away

[09:23] TS: I'm good with vegetables because of my green thumb so

[09:23] AV: M4ybe. I think he w4nts his fe4thers brushed +r s+methin.

[09:23] TS: You can brush feathers?

[09:24] TS: BRB trouble

[09:24] AV: +k4y.

[09:26] AV: https://media.giphy.com/media/iblnwU5gqzM1W/giphy.gif

-- talentedSalad [TS] is now an idle chum! --

[09:34] TS: I',m back

[09:34] AV: Hey.

[09:34] TS: nice gif

[09:35] AV: S+, I s4y brushin, but I just me4n gr++min. He's re4l big +n it.

[09:35] TS: What does grooming entail?

[09:37] AV: S+rt +f like nicer pecking.

[09:37] TS: Wait

[09:37] TS: He wants to groom YOU?

[09:37] AV: I n+rm4lly just w4sh him up with 4 wipin cl+th.

[09:37] AV: He's weird.

[09:38] TS: And the pecking... GROOMING... Does that DO anything?

[09:39] TS: Besides annoy you

[09:39] AV: N+t re4lly. He kind +f just pecks my h4ir while I w4sh him.

[09:40] TS: That's actually kind of cute

[09:40] AV: I uess. But he's re4l pushy +f it.

[09:42] TS: You need to replace that g

[09:42] AV: Wish he w+uld 4sk nicer.

[09:42] AV: 4nd ye4h.

[09:43] TS: I mean yeah, but it's not the worst right? Imagine if your lusus was a chameleon that wanted you to suck its genitals

[09:43] TS: bit of perspective

[09:45] AV: Ye4h, I kn+w. I 4ctu4lly like my lusus. It's just th4t he c4n be rude 4t times.

[09:45] AV: He's pretty gre4t.

[09:45] TS: ^_^

[09:45] TS: Cute

[09:45] TS: Tell him you love him

[09:46] AV: But I d+n't w4nn4 tell him bec4use he 4lre4dy h4s 4 bi eg+.

[09:46] TS: Will it really make things worse?

[09:47] TS: It might make him back off

[09:47] AV: He's 4lredy re4lly fl4shy

[09:47] TS: what if you embarrass him

[09:47] TS: that would be funny

[09:47] AV: I d+n't think he'd let me li<e it d+wn.

[09:47] TS: No?

[09:47] AV: I'm n+t sure.

[09:48] TS: How would he hold it over you?

[09:48] AV: He w+uldn't le4<e me 4l+ne. e<er.

[09:48] TS: Ohhhh

[09:48] TS: Yeah, I could see that

[09:48] AV: He'd be e<en m+re clingy.

[09:48] TS: Bummer

[09:49] TS: Have you EVER told him that you love him?

[09:49] AV: Ye4h, 4 few times. He w+uld 4lw4ys 4lm+st suff+c4te me in 4 fe4thery embr4ce.

[09:50] TS: Ohhhhh

[09:50] TS: <3

[09:50] TS: Cute bird dad is cute

[09:51] AV: He is, but g+ds.

[09:53] AV: Well, I d+n't think i c4n st4ll much l+ner. I +tt4 g+ r++m him.

[09:55] TS: Good luck, my dude

[09:55] TS: Does that mean you gotta go?

[09:55] AV: Ye4h, f+r n+w. I'll t4lk t+ y+u l4ter, br+.

[09:55] TS: Okay. Later

[09:56] AV: Bye.

-- aestheticVirtuoso [AV] gave up trolling talentedSalad [TS] at 21:56 --

-- aestheticVirtuoso [AV] changed their mood to OFFLINE --

@aesthetic-virtuoso

[journeysintowebcomics]

Homestuck Liveblog #169

UPDATE 169: Dialogue Jamboree

Last time Calliope talked with the doomed version of herself, getting told there’s nothing else for her to do. Thankfully, that doesn’t mean Calliope is going to float in the dream bubbles for all eternity, because she got revived. The fights against the antagonists of this long story is coming closer and closer, so let’s see what else happens.

Thankfully for my own sanity, Jasprosesprite leaves in the very first page of today’s update. Thanks, Hussie. Nevermind, the point of view is still following her. Dammit, Hussie. Since fusing with a cat seems to have completely disabled Rose’s brain-to-mouth filter and any qualms she may have about saying everything that crosses her mind, she immediately babbles, saying there was something she wanted to tell Kanaya. But first.

First she has to give in to cat impulses. How curious, Jade never felt the need of acting like a dog beyond a few circumstances involving chasing cats. Other than that it didn’t seem like she had acquired any other behaviors. That’s why I have to wonder why Jasprosesprite is so different on that regard. Maybe it’s related to Rose or Jasper’s personalities, Bec was a generally calmer animal, from what I remember of him. Either way, all Jasprosesprite did was nuzzle Kanaya and then left. Well that was...a moment.

Jasprosesprite decides this is a good time to bother Dave and Dirk, who are at Dirk’s planet. Got used yet to this version of your brother, Dave? I had hoped to see them crossing a few words, but I guess that’s not possible. It’s a shame, there was a lot of potential for some character development there.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: This is it? The big reunion comes down to this then. A lot of awkward sitting around while we all gaze at my father's pretty pretty legs? 

I’m sure it’s your presence here what’s making it awkward. Hussie, is this you making allusions to how you plan the big reunion to be like? Unseen and awkward? It wouldn’t be the first time he does something like that, really.

Honestly I have no comment on the next dozen or so pages, or at least commentary you haven’t heard from me already. Let’s just say I have this growing sense of annoyance directed at a certain character created recently. At least this all comes to a rather useful point: what are they all going to do with the last unused kernelsprite? There are four trolls currently dead, and since Vriska is away and unable to nag at them about using it for resurrection purposes in battle, may as well use it to revive one of the trolls. Of all the options Feferi and Nepeta are the ones I think anyone would prefer, because Sollux being revived again would make him really unhappy, and who’d want Eridan back into the group.

OH GOD DON’T DO THAT EVER AGAIN

Terezi knows what’s going to happen: the cat sprite is going to resurrect the cat troll. That’s not so bad, Nepeta was a likable troll. I wouldn’t mind having her around again. Of course, given that it’s a one-time prototyping, chances are there’ll be a second one in the future. Given that Tavrosprite and Nannasprite are the two sprites left...hm...tell me there isn’t going to be a bizarre mix of Nannasprite and a sprite of Nepeta, please.

There’s not much time to think the implications and potential trouble mixing more sprites together would bring, because the next page brings up a slightly overwhelming possibility.

That’s...a lot of options to choose – or not, because it’ll be done linearly, according to the narration here. Still, looks like there is going to be a lot of dialogue. Have we reached a standstill in the progression of the plot? Because...ten conversations isn’t a small amount. It’s true last time there were many options the conversations within were limited to three or four pages, but there was a lot of dialogue in all of them. It’s a bit of a momentum killer, having to read so many conversations in a row. I wonder how many of the seven hundred or so pages that are left will have to be spent reading this stuff.

The first dialogue is between Dave and Dirk. Looks like the big reunion is actually going to happen! Great! This marks the first time Dave is going to talk with his brother – or a version – and the first time Dirk even sees his brother – or a version. It’s the kind of thing that can be awkward, and since the Striders aren’t the paragon of emotional intelligence this is bound to be even more awkward. Let’s go ahead!

I’m having the impression neither of them knows very well what to say to the other. It may be that their personalities and cool guy behavior clash, not letting each other say what they feel, but they’re trying to connect with each other, for example by mentioning that when they get careless, shenanigans happen. It’s not a topic of conversation that lasts long.

DAVE: soooooo  DIRK: So.  DAVE: so indeed  DIRK: So is pretty much... the thing we're saying.  DAVE: ...  DAVE: thats uh  DAVE: our conjunction of choice it seems  DIRK: ...  DAVE: (fuck)

Behold! There’s so much they want to say, but not enough emotional strength to say it. I understand how that feels, honestly. Maybe in their case actions could speak louder than words, but then again, what could they do? Neither of them is the type to, hm, give hugs or anything like that.

Dirk seems to have finally gotten a topic of conversation: the plot of this long story. There are fights to come in the future, is Dave prepared to face their enemies? Dave doesn’t sound very confident, instead diverting the conversation to their swords instead of what’ll come. The conversation fizzles.

You know, Hussie is very good at writing dialogue. I can feel very well the awkwardness here, it’s almost palpable, and it makes me hope they’ll manage to connect at some point. That really is Hussie’s strength, most times he manages to make the reader want the best for the characters.

DIRK: So when are we supposed to fight?  DAVE: god i hope soon

See? Just that one response from Dave showcases how he’s feeling. The image above adds to it, too. I think it’s for things like this that I like Homestuck, besides the interesting events. Even though my level of interest on Homestuck has decreased considerably since the times of Act 4 or 5, sometimes moments like these still happen.

Sadly, there’s no further dialogue. There’s no reason to despair yet, though, the ninth conversation to be read is with Dave and Dirk again. Maybe in it they’ll manage to talk. For now there’s the large group – John, Rose, Calliope, Roxy, Terezi and Jane.

John wants to know who this new friend is, to which Roxy proudly introduces her. Everyone gushes that Calliope is cute – to which I kinda agree. Terezi isn’t willing to follow the example, as usual.

TEREZI: THOUGH 1F 1'M B31NG HON3ST, YOU SM3LL PR3TTY UGLY FROM WH3R3 1 4M ST4ND1NG  JOHN: oh my god.  JOHN: you are terrible!  TEREZI: PL34S3, JOHN  TEREZI: 1 D1D NOT M34N TH4T 1N 4N UNFL4TT3R1NG W4Y 

So classy of you, Terezi. Way to go. She truly didn’t mean it in an unflattering way, she honestly thinks having a skull for a head is badass, and that the effect is ruined when people say it’s cute. Well she’s not wrong, but I think Callie would like more to be called cute than anything else.

JOHN: (don't listen to her callie, she's a weirdo.) 

Everyone here is a weirdo, you dork.

John’s compliments lead to him saying that Calliope is nothing like her brother and that’s what makes her cute, which directs the conversation to Lord English just for enough time to say that Caliborn is garbage, and ask her what she’s going to do now. She’s not going to get involved in any fights, right? Not even against the Felt, I hope.

JOHN: that's kind of the point of life, right? to take a lot of time floundering around, figuring stuff out.  JOHN: the answer will come to you eventually. you should just try to have fun!

That’s a philosophy I like. Figuring out what to do in life isn’t easy, of course there’s going to be a lot of floundering around. I’m sure she’ll do great in whatever future she chooses for herself – supposing everything goes according to plan and they defeat all their foes, that is.

When Jane asks what happened in that winding path in the dream bubble, Calliope says she had encountered an alternate self.

CALLIOPE: she seems tremendoUsly powerfUl.  CALLIOPE: she is also...  CALLIOPE: qUite frightening.  ROXY: frightening????  CALLIOPE: not that i think she is dangeroUs or has ill intent.  CALLIOPE: my impression was very mUch to the contrary.  CALLIOPE: still, while speaking to her...  CALLIOPE: i can't remember ever feeling so nervoUs. 

It’s because that doomed Calliope is so different to the Calliope here, or at least that’s what she thinks. I agree that must be it. Triumphing over her brother must have changed her a lot, especially because she had no contact with anyone else. Rose wonders if Calliope reviving means she’s destined to do something important, but hers is the minority opinion. Calliope just wants to sit aside and let things happen, after all, the alternate Calliope is the one with a task to fulfill. Good luck to her.

Next is Vriska – Ghost Vriska – and Meenah. Uh, alright...not the combination I was most interested on, but fine. Ghost Vriska is near horses, saying that she used to consider them an omen of disaster, that always something bad happened when they were nearby, but now she’s fine with horses.

(VRISKA): 8ut we've 8een hanging around them a while now, and everything's 8een fine.  (VRISKA): More than fine, actually!

...does this mean something awful is going to happen? Because, knowing Hussie, this peaceful moment is going to shatter in a thousand pieces, especially because the Vriska who is alive is very frustrated with her ghost. I’m almost afraid of what may happen. Oh, and this ghost has the treasure chest with Lord English’s juju, that pretty much guarantees Vriska is going to come here.

Meenah seems a bit distracted. What’s going through her head? Not even when Ghost Vriska tries to come up with a fun plan for the day she reacts further than protest how boring it’d be to explore, because after a long time dead things start looking the same for her. I wonder how much time has passed since last time these two were on-screen? Time doesn’t pass linearly in the dream bubbles. It may have been less than a day in the rest of the place, but here in the dream bubbles it may have been millions of years.

Ghost Vriska tries to get Meenah to talk about her feelings, she doesn’t want to. It’s all fine until that person arrives.

VRISKA: *Cough.*

Please try not to be a major jerk, Vriska, thank you. She demands the treasure and...and that’s it? Well that’s disappointing. I felt this was all building up to something, but in the end it didn’t.

Back to Roxy and Calliope. Calliope isn’t used to talking with others in person, so she’s comfortable with Roxy taking her away to talk about the other Calliope and what her existence meant.

ROXY: you were the force in our lives that gave us hope that we could all get together some day 

Well Calliope did give a lot of hints about the game and what’d entail. I wonder how things would have gone if Calliope had been available to give advice and support during the session, back when they were all alone and waiting. Then again...they’d all be dead if Calliope had been available because, you know, it would have been against the alpha timeline’s designs.

ROXY: so whenever something stupid happens like some a-hole gets a bonehead idea to steal a ring and then everyone dies horribly and at the TIME u think ur just gonna curl up and cry yourself into weepy nonexistence  ROXY: maybe those arent even "bad" realities?  ROXY: maybe they are as important as any 

Unfortunately they aren’t, in terms of Homestuck. They may be important in their own lives and stories, but in this one most of those timelines are pretty much unimportant. Heck, even the timelines one would have thought would be more important are turning out not to be! Like for example everyone who died in the Game Over timeline. Their dead selves may be around, but they’re just...over there in the dream bubbles. I don’t think we’ll see them ever again.

I have no clue what the doomed Calliope is going to do, and this conversation isn’t hinting it. Whatever Hussie is planning is being hidden really well so far.

Since Calliope wants to be useful, Roxy wants her support so she can finally make the matriorb – without creating an abomination mixed with a generic cube, hopefully! Could Calliope help Roxy picture better that weird egg? Roxy seems to think that, at least, and Calliope is willing to give it a try. But, true to Hussie’s frustrating style of storytelling, the scene changes to the other side of the lotus platform, to John, Rose, Terezi and Jane. They’re all trying to relax in preparation of the tough fights ahead.

ROSE: I imagine it's a lot easier to relax when another version of yourself hasn't been hijacked by your dead cat. 

Somebody is still bitter about it! Haha, well, it’s not like Jasprosesprite is going to be around for long, there’s no time in the story for that.

ROSE: Come to think of it, you're the only one of us who hasn't. I mean, of our original group of friends.  ROSE: Dave had Bird Dave, Jade had Dog Jade, and now I have... *shudder*... Cat Rose.  ROSE: Why were you let off the hook? 

Because John wasn’t close to any kind of animal. The closest thing he had to an animal was his pogo thing on his backyard, and a protagonist that’s half John and half pogo ride isn’t the kind of protagonist most people want.

Nobody understands how Jasprosesprite is something they have to see – sentiment I happen to share? What do you mean I have said that like eleven times already? Nonsense.

ROSE: What's next? Is there a sprite cubed? Or a...  ROSE: Let's not even entertain this avenue of thought. 

The worst part is that it’s a completely possible scenario. There’s one sprite left to be made, which may or may not be Nepeta. Given Jasper’s fondness for Nepeta, I wouldn’t be surprised if the lack of restraint Jasprosesprite has showed will make her try to nuzzle a first-tier prototype Nepetasprite. I don’t want to think how that’d end like.

Rose is having existential doubts, starting to think that sprite has more rights to be called the real Rose. I object on grounds of that character being nothing like Rose. Now she feels the need to upstage the other Rose, surely by doing something great – like helping defeat the Condesce, perhaps? John is completely supportive of Rose despite seemingly not completely understanding how she feels. Thanks, John, you’re a pal.

JOHN: hey, how do you think kanaya and karkat are doing? 

Karkaroni is currently counting woolbeasts, and Kanaya is too busy not understanding what was up with that weird sprite that nuzzled her. Usual Homestuck stuff, you see.

Rose is completely sure those two trolls will be successful at doing whatever Echidna wanted them to do – which is true, they already did. That makes John give his blessing to the Kanaya/Rose pairing, which this time doesn’t involve getting drunk at all. Thank goodness for this being a better timeline in that regard!

Because Terezi jeers the heartfelt conversation, John goes to tell her to stop, to which Terezi acts coy as if she didn’t know what he was talking about. And then...there it comes! The reveal!

TEREZI: <3< 

Not a pairing I ever saw coming. Congratulations on your kismesistude, John.

The reason why Terezi is here instead of because she wanted to give enough space to the Striders so they had their own mushy reunion. Would it have gone better if Terezi had been there? No idea. Maybe it would have because at least Terezi would force them to talk. “H3Y, S3COND STR1D3R, D4V3 W4NTS TO H4V3 A WORD W1TH YOU” or something, which’d make Dave try to tone down the situation, and done! Conversation happens! At least it wouldn’t be two stressed kids sitting around not knowing what to say to each other.

That’s the end of the update. Well, alright. Until next time, everyone.

Next update: two updates