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hitohitonika · 3 months

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nami x sanji but lesbian:

Nami rolled her eyes. She had wanted to drink, get absolutely wasted. She deserved to be dumb and lightheaded for a night after all the trouble the men put her through. But of course, Sanji had wanted to accompany her and now she had to babysit him.

Unlike her, Sanji was a lightweight. He was absolutely wasted, his eyes were droppy, and his face was all flushed. She could acknowledge he looked pretty, and if she liked men, she might have made a move. Scratch that. Even if Nami was into men, that would be a bad idea. She would not have been able to get rid of him ever again.

And now she had made herself sad. She missed being with a woman so much. This dry spell was gonna be the end of her. Which is why she wanted to get drunk in the first place.

"Nami," Sanji called for her, dragging her out of her daydreaming, "Do-on't tell aaanybory. Ssppeshially N-nami," he slurred over his words.

She sighted. "Uh huh?" Usually, she would gleefully hear the gossip coming out of a drunk crewmate's mouth, but all she was expecting to hear was Sanji confessing his love for her for the millionth time. He didn't seem to care how many times she's made it clear that she would never be attracted to him.

He rested his forehead against his bottle, "You kno, ssssometimess I-I wishh I wash a w-wo-man."

Well, that was new. Was this a new way of flirting with her? I know you like girls so I wish I was one?

But when he looked up at her, she saw in his eyes that he was waiting for some sort of reaction of approval or disgust or something. Nami raised her eyebrows but didn't say anything, making the effort not to show any emotion on her face to encourage Sanji to keep blabbering.

"Sssometimes I-I fffeel l-like one. Isssn't it weird?" They were on the side of the party, but even here, the distant reflection of the bonfire made it clear Sanji's cheeks were getting wet now.

'Shit,' Nami cursed in her thoughts, 'he's being serious about this.'

"Sanji?" She got close to his face. He never cried. He had never shown her his true emotions, not like this. And she had never realized how pretty Sanji's eyes were, or his lips, now that she was close enough to feel him breathing on her skin.

He groaned, getting away from her. "N-neverrmind, it'sss stupid. I-I'm sstupid." He slumped next to her, leaning his head on her shoulder, his empty bottle rolling from his hand over the ground. "I-I jussst thinkk it would ffeel ssso good t-to be a girrl in Nami's aarms." He whispered against her clothes.

It took a moment for Nami to compose herself. Did Sanji just come out to her? Did she want to kiss Sanji? What the hell had just happened?

Sanji’s snores made her look his way. Her way? The cook was sleeping against her shoulder, mouth open and dripping saliva on her cothes.

Nami should have been disgusted, but she wasn't. Nami should have probably gotten away from Sanji and wait until they were sober to properly talk, but she didn’t. Sanji looked so peaceful... she surprised herself wanting to stay like that.

She moved her arm so she could wrap it around Sanji, pulling the cook closer against her chest. She was effectively cuddling the blonde, and she had to admit it, it was true. Sanji felt good as a girl in her arms.

#trans sanji #one piece #sanji #sanami #namisan #sanji x nami #nami #nami x sanji #fem sanji #one piece fanfic #one piece ficlet

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oubliette-odette · 7 months

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The Reluctance of Love Pt. 15

Orc Male x Half-Elf Male, Fated Mates, Forbidden Love, Slow Burn Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14 Word Count: 2257 (average 17 min read) Content Warnings: mention of mating, homophobia, fantasy racisms. Steamy scenes will come to those who are patient. :) All orcish is from orcishdictionary.com, created by Matt Vancil.

I had found being safely tucked into a corner behind a pillar was the most comfortable place for me in the room. The shadows kept me from drawing attention and Doxxah stood only a few feet away making nice conversation with the people around them. They would occasionally glance my way, but never brought anyone’s attention to me. How Doxxah had ever managed to make friends with these people, I don’t believe I would ever know. I felt completely ostracized and alone in this place and I didn’t feel safe to speak with anyone.

My eyes were unfocused as I looked around the room and took in the crowd - the swarms - of people dancing and mingling. Some were holding votives of wine, others were admiring the space. I looked around too, but my head was too full to retain anything that I saw. I had been standing here for a long time, watching and weaving my eyes through the crowds to spot Altan, and everything felt different, slower, where I stood.

I was brought out of my daze when there was a loud banging and everyone stilled and looked up at the stairs at the top of the Grand Hall.

“Presenting, Duke Taliesin Valdemir Hilmar and his son Altan Hithranri Hilmar.”

I jerked my attention to the center of the stairs and found him, standing stiffly and so uncomfortably next to his father, but I did not see an Altan I recognized. His face was dim, his eyes were downcast and he seemed like he was folding in on himself. He was dressed in black, a colour he should never be allowed to wear. I found that all breath had escaped me and I fell against the pillar as I gazed upon Altan.

Where was his radiance? His glow? I found my hand pressed against my chest, holding the pounding of my heart in place inside me. I didn’t know what had come over me, but it was a painful sensation.

“Good evening, my most honoured and welcomed guests.” The Duke announced. His voice had been magicked to amputate it and extend it across the entirety of the large space. No one would miss his commentary. “We once again come together with friends across many lands to celebrate the coming of the Autumn Season where our crops will again be gathered, prepared and stored for the coming winter. We in Berdusk feel fortunate to be hosting for so many of our neighbors to provide this celebration of life and renewal.”

“But there is something about this particular year’s celebration that makes it especially unique.” He turned and brought his aarm was around Altan and he pulled him up to his side. “It was 200 years ago that my ancestor Dafydd Hilmar defended this land - our beautiful land - from the dangers of the evil folk who lurked South of us. Since Dafydd’s time, the Hilmar name has continued to promise prosperity and protection for the people of Berdusk and I am pleased to present my son as my heir to continue that legacy. The Hilmar family will continue to protect and guide these people through years to come. When there are those who would bring danger and change to our land, I can promise you that the Hilmar name will be the first to defend our tradition, our way of life.”

I noticed the way Altan’s gaze lowered as his father continued. His hands were worrying and fidgeting with the hem of his sleeve. Even as people clapped and applauded his honour and position, I could see the way he shrunk at all of the attention.

“And not only will the Hilmar legacy continue through my heir, but there is a promise of prosperity in continuing the name onward. My son has agreed to be wed.”

Cheers erupted, but I heard none of it. I saw the Duke’s mouth moving - continuing his proclamation. I heard nothing he said, only the sharp ringing in my ears.

I saw Altan, the way he stiffly stood as the Duke ushered a small, girlish looking woman to stand next to them. She smiled shyly at Altan and then to the crowd I ached as he smiled in return. The girl immediately clung to Altan’s side as they waved and bowed to the crowd. She looked like she couldn’t be older than seventeen or eighteen years old and she was petite, and blonde and pale. Everything about her looked smooth and glassy, like porcelain. She watched Altan with a nervous smile. The Duke stood behind the couple, his face pleased.

I could only lean against the pillar with my fingers clinging to the vial.

Celebration and congratulations were exclaimed, but my lips were tight. I caught Doxxah’s eyes on me, they didn’t say anything, but I saw the empathetic gaze in them and I looked away, blinking back the rage that was settling in me.

My hand was on the vial, my fingers playing with the stopper.

Altan…I watched him as he descended the stairs to join the crowd and the way his smile didn’t quite meet his eyes. Was he mine to claim? With that vial, I could have him if I chose, force our bodies together and take him away from all of this. Lordhovid could fix all of this.

But perhaps…this was for the best. This union between two people. She could give him comforts I never could. She looked good next to him, just the right size and disposition. Perhaps I was foolish for believing someone like me ever really had a chance to be loved.

Perhaps this was truly what made me broken all along, that I was only meant to love what I couldn’t have.

Yet, I would look at Altan and I would see the light gone from his eyes. He didn’t choose this, did he? He didn’t agree to this, did he?

I couldn’t bear to watch anymore as they wandered through the crowd. I kept my eyes down.

“Not exactly the news we were hoping for, eh?” Doxxah sidled next to me and handed me a glass of wine. “Drink, it will help.”

“Not interested.” I responded.

They pushed the glass into my hand. “I know what’s best right now for a broken heart, you thickhead, and right now you need a good smack of alcohol to help you forget the pain for a bit.”

I looked down at the red liquid, no different in shade than the liquid inside my vial. Either one could help with the pain…but I couldn’t bring myself to do either.

I handed the glass back and shook my head. “I’m not interested in removing the pain.”

Doxxah rolled their eyes. “You romantic folk are always so melodramatic. More for me, I suppose.” They took the glass and downed it in one.

I looked back up at where I last saw Altan and watched. I was doomed to never look away.

“Don’t trust for a minute that he chose this, Drunrag.” Doxxah said. “He’s not one to move on so quickly. This has the Duke’s scent all over it.”

I glanced again over to the crowd of nobles and noticed that indeed The Duke seemed to be the most exultant of the gathering and the one who continued to push Altan towards the girl. I was too far to tell, but I could have sworn I saw Altan’s eyes shifting and looking out, as if he were scanning the crowd, looking for someone.

Possibly me? I could only hope.

“Excuse me?” A voice broke through.

Doxxah and I both turned to see a young boy - an adolescent, no more than fifteen - standing before us. I jerked back when I recognized that it was Altan’s younger brother.

“Selhar!” Doxxah exclaimed. “A pleasant surprise.” They lowered themselves to meet the boy’s height and said softly, “What can I do for you?”

Selhar darted their attention between Doxxah and myself and finally shuffled towards me. “Actually…I was hoping I could speak with you.” He looked up at me, eyes nervous and expectant.

I felt my own eyes widen in surprise and I quickly darted to Doxxah for guidance. But they were no help as they only shrugged and stepped back, letting the boy approach me.

I bent my knees and leaned down to the boys level. “How may I serve you?” I asked, formally.

His eyes were on me, taking in every detail of my face. It usually was uncomfortable for me to be so closely observed, but Selhar’s eyes were not so far from mine and I could read his reactions so carefully. His lips parted, a look of awe as he took in my rough skin, marred with scars from my childhood days, my tusks that protruded from my lower lip. I waited for the awe to transform into fear, but he took a step forward with a look of determination on his face. His hands were clutching each other tightly. ‘Are you the one my brother loves?”

I felt a shudder, a cool shudder run down my spine. It felt like a small little vibration that if it spoke would whisper yes, yes, yes, that is me at those words. I was stunned that he knew me.

I hesitated but finally gave the boy a slight nod.

Selhar’s eyes widened and he broke into a nervous smile. His smile reminded me of Altan’s making me ache inside. “I knew it. I saw you from over there and I just knew it was you. You know, you’re all he talks about when he’s alone.”

Another trill of pleasure and affirmation coursed down my spine, “Really?” I asked.

He nodded and swiveled to look over to where his brother was, “He’s…I don’t…” He paused, collecting his words. “Don’t let him marry her. Please.”

I looked at this boy - so close to becoming a man - who looked so much like his brother in many ways but also possessed an array of qualities that made him totally different - and I beheld how courageous he was for coming here to speak with me.

I nodded, “I will do my best.”

He shook his head. “No, please. If you don’t take him away, my father will control him for the rest of his life. I don’t want that. My father doesn’t understand my brother, he won’t ever.”

He appeared to be pleading at me and I wasn’t sure what to say, what to even do. If he only knew how badly I wanted to stop any wedding from happening for Altan. How close I was coming to downing the vial around my neck and letting my lordhovid control me and overtake us both and breaking everything in my path to get to him.

“I don’t know what to do.” I finally said.

His eyes fell and he nodded, “I understand what you mean.” We both gazed in Altan’s direction. “Can you at least promise me that you’re not going to hurt him or forget him? No matter what happens?”

I hadn’t pondered anything quite to this extreme when it came to Altan. I knew there was something pulling me to him. Something I desired in him. Even with lordhovid gone between us, I still felt a deeper, more deep pull that melded my soul to his. Something about it all scared me profoundly. But I also understood that part of that entailed my desire to never hurt him, to never lie to him. I could never forget him, not in all of the days I had left in this mortal life. I was doomed to remember him - only him.

I nodded my head, “I promise, young lord.”

I felt relief as he broke into a smile. “That will make him happy, thank you.”

Doxxah cleared their throat then, “Selhar, you best get back to your father. He appears to be looking for you.”

Selhar’s back straightened and he gave me one last pressing stare before turning back and weaving through the crowd. I watched him sidle up to his father’s side and with nothing more than a few words was left alone by his father and everyone else.

I somehow knew what it was like to be Selhar. I was neither the oldest or youngest, and I often found myself drifting between being too much in the way or completely invisible. But I saw the way Selhar’s eyes watched and took in everything around him. He was more aware of the reality of the situation than probably anyone realized.

Altan reached for his brother and the two conversed for a moment and my heart stopped when I saw Selhar lift his hand to point towards me.

Altan’s eyes lifted and met mine. I felt the weight, the distance between us and knew he felt it too. In so little time we had found each other’s presence to be more desirable than any other person’s, but there was so much between us keeping us apart. I wished that things could have been simpler for us. Maybe if I had trusted our lordhovid I would have been better at keeping him near me. I wondered how our lives would be different if I had acted sooner.

I kept hoping to see his eyes brighten, but they only returned to me with a dim grief.

“What do I do?” I breathed out and I looked to Doxxah.

“You fight for him,” Doxxah answered, their eyes holding me in their gaze. “You fight for him no matter the odds.”

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