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velvetydream · 2 days

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꒰ :🥊 [ Rocky ] ”♡ᵎ꒱ˀˀ ↷ ⋯

Summary : Your boyfriend loved to take you to his matches, saying you were his little good luck charm, yet you're always worried to the core watching him fight.

Pairing : Boxer! Mingi x GN! Reader

Word count : 1.7K Words

Genre : Romance , Fluff, Angst

Warnings ➵ Boxing, Blood, Injuries, talk

about marriage and having

children (still GN! Reader)

a/n : I have no clue of how boxing works, but Rocky goes hard so I had to write a Boxer Mingi story!🤧💕

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Mingi called you his little good luck charm, while it was an endearing name to be called, you hated it. Because it would end up with him hurt in some way or another. The boxing matches you watched, even when being his lucky charm and he wins, he was hurt. Busted lip, cut eyebrow, sometimes even a black eye. Many bruises all over his body. You hated it and he knew.

"You'll be there Saturday right?" Mingi looks up at you from the table, it was a calm morning so far.. till he had to bring up his next match. Even thinking about his upcoming matches makes your stomach turn, making you nauseous. "I don't know, I might have to work or something." Your back was turned to him as you were flipping the pancakes in front of you. The grip on the handle made your knuckles turn white, until Mingi stood behind you, his hand softly gliding over yours and making you loosen your grip. "You said you're free, you know how important it is for me that you're there." Of course, you knew, you were his little lucky charm, his motivation, the love of his life. Yet it was hard to watch him get hurt over and over again, fearing that someday he would get hurt drastically with irreparable damage to himself.

"Of course, I know that, but you also know I don't like seeing you get hurt! Mingi we've been over this countless times already." Pulling your hand away from his now, you turn the stove off, pushing the pan to a cold place before turning away and walking to the living room, your tall boyfriend following you shortly. "I barely ever get hurt! It's nothing serious!" He was getting irritated with you, just as you were getting annoyed with him. Mingi just won't understand. He won't get it into his thick stubborn head. "Yeah till now! What if one day you get hurt badly?! Paralyzed?! Do you want that? Mingi I'm worried sick every time I watch you!" Tears were building up in your eyes as you finally looked at him. He was visibly taken back by your outburst, he knew you were worried but that it was hurting and bothering you so much? He didn't think about that.

"Hey.. I'm sorry babe, come here.. Please." His hand reaches out to you, softly grabbing your wrist and pulling you against his chest, tears flowing down your cheeks now with soft sobs. Mingi felt torn, he loved boxing, and it was his passion, a way to make money besides his small barely paying job as a waiter. Yet here you were crying in his arms because you were scared to the core for him. The amount of anxiety he must've put you through with each fight he made you watch. Yet you always sat tight, smiled, cheered, and celebrated for and with him. "I should've thought about your feelings earlier, I'm sorry.." Pressing a kiss to the crown of your head, he cradles you against him, your hands balled to fists holding onto the sleeping shirt he was still in.

Mingi was overcome with guilt and also contemplation.. you did have a point. What if someday he took it too far? One wrongly placed hit and it could be over for him and his body. He would never be able to marry you, have children, or grow old with you. Those thoughts made him scared and even question his own choices about boxing. He would definitely have to talk to Yunho about this later at the training. But for now, he had to pamper you, make you smile again, and stop those tears running down your face.

"Pretty, let's watch a movie and cuddle hm? I'll finish the pancakes and you get changed into that sweater of mine you love so much~" Nodding softly, your fist rubbing over your puffy red eyes, before disappearing up the stairs to your and Mingi's shared room, searching for the sweater you loved to steal oh so often. Yet he never gifted it to you, saying it wouldn't feel the same if you owned it and didn't steal it from him anymore. Back in the living room Mingi already prepared two plates with pancakes, arranged just how you like them, some fruits, and just the perfect amount of syrup. "Thanks, Mingi.." Smiling softly at your boyfriend as you take a seat beside him, grabbing your plate while helping him choose a movie. Settling on Spirited Away, and probably also watching Howl Moving Castle immediately afterward.

Mingi later in the day left after making sure you ate dinner, and made his way to the place where he trained at, Yunho already there training one of the new younger guys that joined recently. "Mingi! You're late! What caught you up?" Yunho looked over at him, noticing the frown on his best friend's face, something at home must've happened again. Walking over to Mingi who sat down on the bench, starting to wrap his bandages around his hands, Yunho stood in front of him. "I'll quit after this Saturday. It will be my last match." His eyes did not even meet Yunhos, knowing his friend looked flabbergasted at him now. "What do you mean quit? You're on the best way to become a legend Mingi! You cannot quit now!" His hand was grabbing his shoulder now, shaking him slightly, Mingi swatting his hand away with an annoyed groan. "I don't care, living a long healthy life with Y/N is more important. I never realized through what pain I put them okay.." Mingis hands were clenched, he was visibly distraught.

Of course, he loved boxing, it was his long passion yet he loved you so much more. Enough to give this up to be able to make you not suffer anymore and grow old together.

Getting up now Mingi gets ready to warm up, Yunho following him, the conversation is apparently not over for him yet. "Why all of a sudden?" Voices calmer now, trying to understand his best friend's decision. "I realized what pain I put Y/N through, I want to grow old with them, I want children, want to marry and.. If I someday get injured and can't be saved I would never be able to forgive myself for being so careless with my body." Yunho could understand him, of course, he could. Yunho had been through the same years prior with his wife, yet he never had the potential Mingi had either. "Listen I understand but.. Have you thought this through?" Mingi sends him one last glance, making it known that he is serious.

Leaving the man alone, for now, Yunho goes back to the students he currently has. He can't be mad at Mingi, boxing is dangerous, he knew that, yet it was sad to see a rising star stop mid-air.

"I'm home!" Mingi calls out, noticing the sweet smell of baked goods in the air, making his way to the kitchen. "Mingi! I made some cupcakes! Come on taste them!" Pulling him over, you shove a sweet pastry into his hands, the buttercream decorated with colorful sprinkles. Upon taking a bite, he notices the cream on your face, wiping it away softly with his thump. And now he could see it, this was what he should live for. Your smile, your backed goods, you. Your future children and grandchildren. Growing old together.

Leaning his body down, he presses a kiss to your lips, being able to taste the sweetness of the cupcake he just ate. His hands put the cupcake away to hold your hips softly. "I love you so much, so so much." Pulling you against him, locking your lips again with his own ones. Left hand gliding up to hold the side of your face, his thump caressing your cheek softly.

The rest of the week passes by in a rush, Saturday evening arriving, you're now sitting watching Yunho massage Mingis shoulders talking to him quietly. You were glad that this would be the last time, yet dread filled you knowing you'd have to patch your boyfriend up again after the fight. Soon it started, Yunho walking around the ring, shouting to Mingi who was holding up quite strong. His opponent was not really a big deal for him, Mingi being probably almost double the size of him.

The fight continued, Mingi took in some bad hits but the other one was much worse. Being on the brink of giving up, you could see it on his face. Finally, Mingi got him down, the countdown starting, fans cheering as Mingi threw his fits up into the air. Yunho himself was jumping around screaming happily. Before running over to you and pulling you up, looking confused at Yunho now as he pulls you to the ring Mingi was in, microphone in his hand now.

"I know everyone loves to watch me fight, but despite my joy for it, I never noticed how much I hurt someone dear to me with it. The person who despite being in pain on the inside while watching me, still supported me. The person I want to grow old with." Mingi was talking, reaching out for your hand and pulling you into the ring with Yunho's help, stopping you in the middle. "The person I want children with and I want to marry. So today was my last fight! I will be retiring from fighting, but there is one last thing I have to do in this ring!" Mingi was holding your hand in his, looking into your eyes with so much love and warmth. While you tried to mirror it, you couldn't help the look of confusion.

A gasp now leaving your lips as you watch Mingi get down onto one knee, pulling out a velvet box from his left pocket. Eyes meeting your glassy ones. "You're the love of my life, my motivation.. my lucky charm so will you marry me?" A soft yes was pressed out of your lips, as lips threatened to fall, Mingi put the ring on your finger before standing up, pulling you into his arms and lifting you up. "You just made me the happiest man on earth! I love you so much!" His lips find yours, as the lights of cameras go off around you capturing this memory forever.

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agirlcandream84 · 2 days

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Hey doll! I love the way you write Frank so much! You nail his sexy tough guy attitude and the way he speaks, as well as his caring side who's a softy teddy bear for his girl. 🥰

Not sure if this would fall under a headcanon or request for a drabble, but this idea keeps popping in my head and thought you'd be great to write it... What if you're with Frank, but you finally meet Karen and/or Madani (who are just friends with Frank) They are gorgeous women who seem to have some sort of history with him, and suddenly you feel super self-conscious, unworthy, or jealous...? Comparing yourself to her/them. Frank being a *man* may not get what's happening with you at first? How would he react when he realizes? If you'd like to run with that in any way, I'd LOVE to see it! Because Oof I love angsty Frank Castle... 🫠🖤

Oooooo I love this! Thank you so much for the suggestion!

How Boyfriend!Frank Would Respond to You Being Jealous of Karen

"You gonna tell me what's wrong?" Frank asks, eyes still on the road.

"Nothing, just tired," you lie, choosing isolation instead of confrontation. The truth felt too mortifying anyway.

"Nah, that's not it," he replies, somehow like an order, and you know the issue won't resolve on it's own because Frank won't let it.

"Frank, it's nothing. If it were something I would tell you," you lie with maybe a little too much desperate pleading in your voice. A silent scream to please just drop it.

"Yeah, like when you were starvin' yourself. Like that time sweetheart?" he asks, sarcasm coloring every word.

"That's not.... come on... it's not like..." you fumble for words but come up with nothing because it was sort of exactly like that.

It had felt monumental but you were trying so hard to play it cool at first. Frank was introducing you to Karen. THE Karen. The Karen who was like one of five people Frank really trusted and adored and thought of as family. He kept a tight-night circle and protected the hell outta them and you were equal parts giddy and anxious to finally be introduced to someone so close to him. This was a milestone in your relationship and you were desperate for Karen to like you.

And by all accounts, it went great! Karen was warm and wonderful and it was obvious why she meant a great deal to Frank. And that would be good if she weren't also alarmingly stunning-- all angles and golden hair and clear blue eyes that seemed to bore into Frank and anticipate his moves and needs as if they had a lifetime of history between them. Which they did-- one you weren't a part of and couldn't dare amount to.

And intellectually, you knew this was good for Frank -- to have such a nurturing relationship with someone after having suffered so much loss. And intellectually, you knew that their bond wasn't based on romance but in deep mutual care and respect. And intellectually, you knew Frank loved and adored YOU-- proudly and happily.

But emotionally, you just... couldn't shake it. That insurmountable feeling of inferiority. You're no Karen -- all poise and grace and stunning intellect. You felt shrunk in her presence, suddenly so keenly aware of the caliber of woman Frank kept close. Maybe you were a fraud. Maybe you'd managed to fool Frank all along and this meeting with Karen would bring the reality-- the reality of YOU-- slamming into clear focus.

"I see the way you're pickin' at your fingernails. Don't tell me it's nothin' sweetheart," he responds, maybe some anger in his tone but you knew concern was what had him so persistent.

You shove your hands under your thighs to stop from picking and let out a long sigh. Your head drops low as you contemplate how to navigate the conversation.

"I'm not Karen," you say plainly.

"Yeah no shit," he scoffs.

You gulp and nod, tears pricking at your eyes at his confirmation. "So then... we don't have to.... Listen, I get it if tonight was eye-opening. It was for me. I would understand," you respond.

"Understand what doll?" has asks, his brows stitched in confusion as he ventures a quick glance to the passenger seat.

"Understand if you feel like, I dunno, you have regrets or something," you stutter out.

He pauses, his eyes scanning the road before he checks his rear view and pulls over to the shoulder, puts the truck in park and smashes his finger into the button to turn on the hazards.

"Frank what are--" you start but you're cut off.

"You mind tellin' me what exactly I'd be having regrets about?" he asks, shifting in his chair to face you.

"Well... you know..." you answer, gesturing sort of vaguely at yourself.

"No, I don't think I do know. Why don't you be specific," he says unblinking, his eyes bored into yours, feeling like you were on the other end of an interrogation.

"About me, Frank. I'm not like her. Not even close. Like, she's so damn perfect and you guys together are so-" you blurt out, stopping yourself before you regretted it.

"So wrong, sweetheart. Karen and I are wrong together. I don't love her, not like that at least," he answers with conviction.

"But-" your sputter.

"But what? You gonna tell me how I feel now?" he retorts, raising his brows in question.

"Well no but the way you two are.... it's just special. And she's so, just so gorgeous and kind and..." you reply, your sentence fizzling into the air like mist as his brows furrow again.

He shakes his head at your reply and huffs air out of his nose before reaching across to your seat belt and unlatching it, tugging you across the seat of the truck cab and firmly into his lap. Two calloused hands land on either side of your face and his warm brown eyes scan your face as he brushes a stray hair from your forehead.

"We gotta get you glasses sweetheart," he murmurs.

You contort your face in confusion, muttering "what are you talking about Frank?"

"Cuz you don't see what I see," he answers and you roll your eyes a little at his dad joke.

"I don't think they make glasses like that," you joke back, but the complicated feelings were still stuck, their little grippers dug deep into your feelings.

"Nah I mean it. You really don't see it and that's a problem," he adds, your face flashing to him in concern before he continues, "that I'll consider my duty to solve."

"Unless you're a licensed therapist, you may regret that," you reply flatly. His hands leave your face to land on your hips and he tugs you an inch closer, your chest pressed to his.

"Then I'll happily die tryin' doll," he replies, using a hand to nudge your chin up and meet your eyes again. He plants a tender kiss on your lips then another and another and another until he feels you melt a fraction in his arms.

You pull away for a moment, lip gloss smudged on your face and his, pupils already blown as you feel the pads of his fingers sink into your fleshy hips and you say, "You kisses are no match for my cripplingly low self esteem."

At this he barks out a laugh and responds, "Well fuck sweetheart, I'll guess we'll have try more than kisses then huh?"

#frank castle #frank castle x reader #frank castle fanfiction #frank castle x you #frank castle fanfic #frank castle smut #frank castle x y/n #frank castle fluff #frank castle x anxious reader #frank castle x jealous reader

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treacheryinblue · 3 days

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Chapter 2/4

A Noah Sebastian x F!Reader One Shot Series

Word Count: 7.1k

Masterlist

× Summary: Noah is Death, the ruler of the after life (or whatever you want to call it), though he is cursed to watch you come and go from his never ending existence time and time again.

× Warnings!: Eh-level smut (oral [f receiving], P in V obviously, touch of spanking), language, little bit of violence, tiny fluff if you squint, slight dom!noah, smut with plot aka this became more in depth than I meant for it to aka a one shot that's now a series. Let me know if I missed anything!

× Author's Notes: ( 1 ) Thank you sooo much for all the support this story has been given. It was never was supposed to be more than a one shot, but after all the excitement behind it, I've decided to make it into a short series! I'm going to try to keep it at four parts, just to show the lore behind the characters and also maybe why it's happening...if I can make my brain create such things. ( 2 ) PLEASE suspend all thoughts of how time works when reading this. Time is pretty much just NOT a thing in Noah's realm. It's nonlinear and I refuse to be tied down by it! Also, hopefully the context clues are obvious enough for people to pick up on what time period the female character is from in each chapter. If not, feel free to hit me with a question.

Happy reading! xoxo

“The Dark Lord will be pleased with this one.”

An unknown voice sounded out around you, immediately sending a chill down your spine. You heard yourself expel a whimper of fear as your hands responded by trembling in their bindings. The man must've noticed this because a sadistic sounding laugh rang out, echoing through wherever you were and reverberating in your ears.

How long had you been tied down to this slab of rock? It easily could've only been hours, though it felt like days. Weeks. An eternity. Nothing felt longer than waiting for your impending death.

“Please…” you pleaded in a soft and broken voice. “Let me go and I will make sure no harm comes of you.”

The men again cackled, the kind that you were sure had them gripping their bellies and arching back. Maybe it was a good thing you couldn't see their dirty faces and broken teeth taunting you. That would never be the last thing you'd want anyone to have to witness before their untimely demise.

“The blade. Now.”

Something cool pressed to your chest and immediately forced a slight gasp out of you. Again, you began to tear up and pull at your restraints, although you had no idea what you would do if you happened to free yourself. The noises you had picked up on told you that there were more than two people there, and after so long without food or water, you'd never be able to take them. You were doomed one way or the other.

As the blade traveled downwards, it was made to puncture and rip the bodice of your dress. Another set of hands tugged the thin fabric to further open it, revealing your bare torso beneath it.

“Please! Don't do this!” You cried, now feeling shame from being so exposed.

How horrible was it that you were briefly only concerned about what your mother and father would say of this? They'd scold you, hissing words of how it wasn't very ‘lady like’ and that ‘no man would want you now’. You would be the ‘shamed whore’ of your village.

Before those thoughts could lead with any traction, the sound of faint chanting snapped you from your own thoughts. It started as a whispering and ever so slowly began working its way higher and higher with every repeated line. Unfortunately, you couldn't make out any of the words. It was possible that it was in another language, though also likely that your sobs took the forefront of the focus.

As the volume grew, so did your fear. Your breathing was rapid and uneven, a cool sweat forming across your chest and along the back of your neck. It was not being able to see what was happening that was also truly terrifying. Your captors had blind folded you after securing you down, this being the last time you saw any of their faces. It had been days of darkness - if not longer.

The chanting had started increasing in pace. Voices roared all around you and you could sense someone probably just within your reach (had your hands been free) but they had yet to do or say anything. You sobbed beneath your blindfold, the ropes holding you down rubbing your poor wrists raw from how you had been desperately trying to pull them free. They burned with every motion, and you were sure blood had been coating them since day one. Not that anyone around cared enough to take note.

“Please!” You yelled again, the single worded plea broken from your constant waterfall of tears. You swore you even heard another chuckle from right beside you.

“Send our love to the Dark Lord.”

A fierce pain punctuated his final statement as the blade ripped through your chest. You screamed in terror, just for the blade to be retrieved and then forced through skin, muscle, bone, again and again until you were nothing but a husk of who you had once been.

× × ×

Piercing eyes stared at you from across the long table, silently watching every move you made, no matter how small. You could feel the weight of his gaze despite having told him before how uncomfortable it made you - this had shocked him into a brief silence - but it obviously hadn't been important enough information for him to retain.

As you reached for your glass of wine, he did the same. His motions mirrored yours when you both took a swallow from the glass, followed by another, then another - the third being a mere test to see if he would or not.

“Stop.”

The demand left you with an irritated sigh, your wine glass then being loudly placed back to the table top. He chose to do the opposite, instead opting to lightly set his own glass down in a more respectable manner.

“Stop what?”

Your eyes narrowed at him, lips pressed tight together to showcase to him just how completely and utterly annoying he was. Ever since your arrival, he had done nothing but get under your skin day after day, night after night, second after second.

Maybe you really were in Hell.

“I'm going back to my quarters.”

You weren't going to do this with him again. It had become an every encounter sort of thing at this point - both of you engaging in an argument until you finally stomped off or he dismissed you before you ‘fell victim to his true nature’. How in the world were you supposed to live like this? For how long? Every time you’d yell this inquiry at him, he would only smile like he knew a secret you didn't.

Dropping your napkin to your plate, you were just about to push away from the table when his voice halted your every movement.

“Sit back down now. I haven't excused you.”

There was a sternness to his demand that you had yet to hear from him prior. It shook you to your core…in a way you hadn't expected.

There was a brief pause as you stared at him. You were silently debating with yourself as to whether or not you should listen, weighing the options. Since you had nowhere to go where he couldn't find you, you did as he requested.

“Maybe I've gone about this the wrong way. Maybe I've been too nice. Too lenient. Too patient. Since those approaches don't appear to be working, we're going to switch up to the way I prefer things.”

The man you knew as Noah slowly stood from his chair. Those eyes of his never broke from yours, not even as he placed his palms on the table top and leaned forward a bit to assert only an ounce of his dominance. You wanted to say it didn't make you want to cower in a corner, but it did.

Or maybe take your clothes off…

“You are here in my domain. Do you know what that means?”

Noah's eyebrows raised when he paused, though you knew he wasn't looking for an answer. He already had one of his own loaded and ready to go.

“It means I'm the fucking King and it would be in your best interest to not disobey me.”

You thought it would end there. Unfortunately, that wasn't the case.

But wait…what was this new sensation you were beginning to feel? It was warm and tingly…quite different from any you had experienced before, both when dead or alive.

“It doesn't matter to me that it's you. You are still required to make sure I remain pleased.”

This caught your curiosity and it showed in the way your own brows pulled together ever so slightly.

“What does that mean?”

“It means that you listen to m-”

“No, the first part.”

You could see the way his features softened when he realized what he had said. Was this one of those secrets he always seemed to be keeping from you? Obviously. The issue was that you had no clue what it meant.

“For the love of Go-!” Noah paused before he could get the entire saying out, his jaw clenching and face reddening as if it would truly pain him to say the words. With a deep exhale through his nose, he stood to his full height and raked his fingers roughly through his hair. He was frustrated, though something told you that it wasn't all because of your defiant behavior.

The anger he held was bubbling to the surface and forcing him to lose his composure. He growled as he latched onto the chair and sent it hurling to the ground, followed by the glass of wine he had previously been nursing. Both became shattered pieces that would be impossible to repair.

“Why do you not remember yet?! Is this some cruel joke you're playing on me? Is that it?!”

Before you could even blink he was in front of you. He had forced your chair out a bit, enough for him to wedge himself in front of it to prevent you from escaping. His tattooed hands firmly grasped at the arms of the chair, intense eyes level with your own.

You weren't frightened of him. You had endured the wrath of more vile men many times in the past, your father being one of them, so this temper tantrum of his did not register as a threat.

Plus, you were already dead. What more could he do to you?

“I need you to remember.”

These words were spoken in a much softer tone, almost like he was begging you. Pleading. The pain was clear in his eyes and for some reason this hurt you as well. Why did you care about his feelings? Why did you want to make him feel better? Never during any of your previous altercations had you felt this way.

“I'm sorry…I don't know how…I don't understand…”

Noah appeared crushed. You swore you could hear the sound of his heart breaking; that's how deep his emotions ran along his features. He dropped to his knees in front of you, his head bowed to keep his face hidden. The hands that had once been gripping the arms of the chair fell to your covered knees, now grasping tight to you in any way he could.

“Please…try for me? There's a part of you that would do anything for me, just as I would do for you.”

Although his words continued to confuse you, they didn't disturb you or make you uncomfortable as they previously had. There was even a fraction of you that believed him…which only made you want to try as he was requesting.

Maybe he could sense this, because you felt one of his hands fall and begin lightly tracing along your ankle. The other remained on your knee, still clutching tight.

“Close your eyes…will yourself to remember…I know you can.”

There was a flicker of something behind your closed eyes, almost like a thought. Maybe a memory. You weren't too sure because the scene clip was foreign and not anything you had ever experienced in your living life. All that was familiar within the abrupt flash were his eyes and the way they devoured you.

“That…what was that?”

Noah’s hand cradled your cheek, his touch immediately causing you to open your eyes and connect with his own. There was now a hopeful gleam within them, so much that you swore you even saw his lips threatening to turn up into a smile.

“Did you remember something? Tell me.”

All you could do was slowly shake your head. Even if you wanted to tell him what the brief image had been, you knew you wouldn't be able to put it into words. It was like trying to describe a color to someone that they would never see for themselves. An impossible task to say the least.

Without another word, you quickly pushed him away from you and stood from your chair. Noah was stunned by your actions but made no move to stop you from running away, not like you had expected him to. As you exited the dining room, all you heard behind you was the sound of more glass breaking and Noah’s pained yells.

× × ×

Sleep eventually took over you that night, though it hadn't come easy. To bring forth this needed unconsciousness, you had to think of the images from earlier and imagine what scenario it was attached to.

It took place in an unknown room, though you could assume this room was in the same domain you currently were held in. The decor was the same, the walls and lighting giving this away. It wasn't your current room, though, but somewhere a little more lived in. It was comfortable, if you were being honest. Almost as comfortable as the bed you were laid out over in this flash of images.

There was a warmth that accompanied them, one that you were only barely accustomed to. You had experienced it before during your living existence when you had hiked your dress up to your hips and buried your fingers between your thighs - these moments were fleeting and only happened enough times for you to count on one hand.

Although, it wasn't your hands that brought forth the unfamiliar but welcomed warmth this time, but something - someone - far more enticing.

A pleasure radiated throughout your entire being in a way that had your body trembling and your voice crying out for more. You had managed to open your eyes long enough to see his head between your spread thighs, decorated fingers holding tight to you to make sure you remained fully open for him, all while his mouth worked wonders in ways you didn't know possible.

“Noah!” You moaned and whimpered, his name on your lips only sending him into an excited frenzy. He groaned into you as his mouth secured around your clit, harshly sucking before soothing the nerves with swipes of his tongue that made your hips buck and your cunt clench in a desperate need to be filled.

“You're so perfect…” he breathed as he pulled back just enough to watch his fingers disappear inside of you. The sensation was heavenly, as ironic as that was, even more so when his long digits dipped and curled within your dripping wet warmth. Noah stroked along a spot that immediately had you gasping for air and gripping tight to the already tangled sheets your body had become well acquainted with. The mess of linens told you that you had been at this for a bit now, and it definitely wasn't his first time admiring you from below.

“Don't stop, please…” you begged, soft and gentle between your labored breathing.

Noah happily obliged, not that he had any plans on stopping until he was thoroughly satisfied with your amount of pleasure. His wicked mouth returned to your clit, tongue swirling and flicking in a way only the Devil could know how, while his fingers assisted in bringing you right to the edge.

If this was eternal damnation, then you would willingly devote the rest of your existence to it, to him.

Just a couple more firm strokes of his fingers and your body was tensing, a pressure building so high that it literally felt as if you were going to explode. And almost as soon as the thought passed your mind, your body released - literally and metaphorically. Moans heaved from you and your hips writhed beneath Noah’s form, a sudden wave of pure heat traveling through you and coating his fingers. The bed became soaked, though Noah seemed less than concerned about this. He hadn't even let up on pulling your clit between his lips and forcing his fingers harder within the collapsing and pulsing walls of your cunt.

You awoke from your slumber with a gasp, your body abruptly sitting up in bed. It took a moment for you to gather yourself, but you eventually noticed that you were alone and no longer in the room from your…dream? Memory? It was still so hard to say. As you made a motion to move, you felt a throb between your thighs, a deep pulsing just like the one your subconscious had just been experiencing.

You thought nothing of it at first, not until you stood from the bed only to realize the sheets, as well as your clothing, held a wet spot right where one could assume.

It only took a moment for you to change, though you left yourself bare beneath the sleeping gown with not even the top tied securely. There was no reason for you to waste time with it when there was one thing on your mind now.

After a few wrong turns and having to backtrack more than you'd like to admit, you finally stumbled upon the study where you knew Noah to spend the majority of his time. Sometimes you swore this domain liked to purposely switch up and change on you, just to make finding your intended location all the more difficult.

“Stop lingering,” his voice called out after you had stood outside the cracked door for far too long.

A small jolt in response to his voice being directed to you caused your heart to skip a beat, though you did as he said and gently pushed the study door open enough for you to slip through.

“How did you kno-”

“Nothing happens here without my knowledge of it. No matter how small or…private.”

That's when his eyes lifted to meet with you, they focused in on your hips first before slowly trailing up to your own gaze. Something gleamed within his stare, but it wasn't something you were yet capable of putting your finger on. All you knew was that it further stirred a sensation inside you.

“It's late,” Noah then pointed out as he leaned back in his chair, sights still locked on you.

You nodded in understanding, slow steps being taken closer to the desk he resided behind. Instead of stopping in front of it, you moved around the side and only paused once you were in front of him, just within arm’s reach. You could see Noah's chest inflate with a deep inhale, his eyes further darkening at the close proximity. Had his gaze even flickered down to where your hardened nipples were evident beneath the thin fabric of the dress you wore? You swore they had.

Speaking of your clothing…it was drastically different from what Noah always wore. His black on black suit wasn't like anything you were used to seeing, though your clothes were reminiscent of your time, unchanging from what you knew. How odd, you thought to yourself. This wasn't the time to ponder such things, though. It was just one more mystery added to the collection you were keeping note of.

“I had a dream,” you finally revealed. A hand hesitantly reached out so you could trail a finger slowly beneath his jaw, a simultaneous step closer to him also being taken. “At least…I think it was only a dream.”

“A memory, perhaps.” Noah spoke up, his eyebrows raised.

“Perhaps.” Your hand fell from his face and you swore you noticed a sadness quickly glaze over his eyes, almost as if he missed your touch already. Lucky for him, you had no intention of keeping your hands to yourself right then.

Delicate fingers clutched the fabric that covered your body, now being pulled up just enough so you could freely move while settling into Noah’s lap. Your knees straddled him and his hands moved to lay atop the bare skin of your thighs, almost like a reflex.

“Tell me what you remember.”

A slight shrug of your shoulder caused the gown to fall away, revealing more of your skin to him. His eyes followed the trail of your neck down your shoulder and to your chest, just as he reached up to further tug the fabric away in a gentle manner until the swell of your breasts were shown.

Noah had learned forward so he could slowly kiss along the bared skin of your chest. His hands traveled up the sides of your thighs, purposely pushing the hem of the dress up more, but not fully. He was then gripping your waist, slyly pulling your body even closer to his while his lips dipped between the valley of your breasts.

“It's mainly feelings that I remember, not necessarily specific moments…”

A question lingered at the tip of your tongue, one that you weren't really sure the meaning of. It was merely plaguing the back of your mind, leaving you curious for an answer that could possibly mean absolutely nothing to you.

“How…many times have I been here?”

The inquiry caused Noah to pause, his eyes flickering up to yours before he relayed an answer.

“This makes five. Five lives…five versions of you…and this you by far has been the most stubborn.”

This knowledge didn't frighten you like it would have mere hours ago. No, it actually made a bit of sense now, like the puzzle pieces were all slowly starting to come together.

“And each one is me?”

Noah hummed lightly, his lips returning to their trek along your chest. He was being much softer with you than you would've imagined, especially given the outburst you had witnessed from him earlier.

“Same body, same eyes, same markings…” he punctuated this with a slight bite to a prominent freckle that sat off to the side of your right breast. “Even the same name.”

“So…where are all of the previous versions of me at?”

A heavy sigh followed your question, his jaw clenched in obvious frustration. Having not yet answered, Noah swiftly picked you up and laid you down atop his desk after swiping the unnecessary items aside. There was a darkness in his eyes again, and you noticed that his previous soft caresses were becoming much more defined and needy. Witnessing this had your insides stirring, but in a way that made you thankful for wearing nothing more than your sleep gown.

“You’ve been taken from me.”

Noah’s voice was harsh, the words almost being hissed through gritted teeth. Apparently you had touched on a sore subject without even realizing it. But still, he began undressing himself as you laid beneath him, vulnerable and aching. Not even his growing anger was going to stop him from having you.

With his torso now bared to you, you took a moment to take in all of the permanent etchings that crowded his skin. You had never seen such things before, though you've heard tales of tattoos and these being described as the ‘mark of the Devil’. Clearly your time wasn't too far off, considering who you were currently in the company of.

A hand grabbed your face and forced you to look up at him as his body hovered over your own. Noah’s eyes were as intense as ever as he searched within yours, on a hunt for something.

“You aren't meant for this world but you are mine. I'll see to it that every death brings you to me. They can't stop me.”

They?

There was no chance for you to inquire about this because Noah’s mouth was then on yours, all hot and desperate. He kissed you like his life depended on it - funny enough - like you were the only thing that could breathe oxygen back into his lungs. And much to your own surprise, you kissed him back with just as much ferocity. His taste was addicting and familiar, one that you wanted to hold onto for as long as you could.

Even as he pulled back, you swiped your tongue along your lower lip simply to savor what remained.

One strong pull was all it took for Noah to rip the gown you wore straight down the middle, his eyes immediately drinking you in. He leaned down and took one of your nipples into his mouth, moaning against your heated skin while flicking his tongue along the hardened bud before sinking his teeth in. You gasped at the slight pain, but the rise of your hips to grind against his let him know that you actually enjoyed it.

Noah smirked as he moved to your opposite nipple, displaying the same loving abuse to it. A warmth was pooling between your thighs and you were suddenly so eager for his touch that you didn't know what to do with yourself. Your hips continued to grind along his, desperate to feel any sort of relief, but the material of his pants were too soft and not at all what you were aching for.

“Not so defiant now, are you?” He taunted, his clothed hips firmly pressing into yours just to further rile you up.

“Look at you…desperate and whining…you must be remembering how good I can make you feel.”

Indeed you were, because never have you felt a need as strong as this before. Something in you knew just how mind blowing a climax at his hands could be and you wanted it now. You were so caught up in your own selfish needs that you hadn't even heard the sound of his belt coming off or the distinct ripple of the zipper being dragged down. When your eyes met with him again, he was fully naked and standing between your legs, slowly stroking along every inch of his hard cock.

“Fuck…the things you do to me,” he murmured to himself, heavily exhaling through his nose. You watched in awe as he continued to touch himself, his hips pushing forward to thrust into his hand, even as he rubbed the head of his cock down between your folds. Noah’s eyes closed and his head tossed back, reveling in the sensation of you being so wet for only him.

“Please…” you whimpered, your legs spreading more as if that would help entice him in. As much as you liked watching him get himself off, surprisingly enough, you were far too needy in that moment to have any bit of his stamina wasted on his hand.

Releasing the hold he had on his cock, he instead grabbed your calf and lifted your leg to his shoulder. His strong hands now held your hips, the tip of his cock pressed right to your entrance since he had produced the perfect angle after maneuvering your body around however he saw fit.

“You have to be a good girl and take it,” he instructed, his voice soothing but still holding an edge to it.

Noah pressed forward, allowing only the swollen head of his cock to stretch through your tight walls that hugged him just as close as he remembered.

“Say it.” He demanded, refusing to go any further until you had.

You shakily breathed out, your heart racing and blood pumping so fast that your cheeks were flushed a deep red already. “I'll be a good girl,” you repeated his words, nodding. “I'll take it, I promise.”

Happy with this, Noah thrusted forward in a swift motion that you had taking every inch he had to offer. Your tight pussy welcomed him into your depths with a constricting pulse that would've made him cum right then had he not had an eternity of practiced self control.

Noah deeply groaned, his jaw set and biceps flexed while holding you in place. Your own moans mixed with his, your body trembling in his grasp from just how intense it was to be fully filled by him. It was like nothing you had ever felt before…quite literally since your living existence had yet to experience the touch of another. You had only known a release at your own hands, which was nothing compared to this.

“That's it…” he cooed the familiar phrase as he began his rapid pace of driving his cock deep into you again and again, forcing moans and profanities never yet spoken from you each time. “You're always so good at taking it.”

Oh, how you wanted nothing more than to take all that he had to offer.

The stretch of your walls were so tight around him that you swore you could feel every engorged vein throbbing when he forced himself as deep as possible. Noah turned his head so he could kiss along your ankle, the grip he had on your calf tightening just before leaning forward a bit. It was a good thing you were pretty limber or else a cramp would've surely ruined the mood by now. Noah didn't seem concerned about this, though. He was far too focused on the shape of your lips as you cried out his name.

This angle had to have been created by this Devil himself though, because you could barely take a breath from how overpowering it was. You looked up at him with furrowed brows and nothing but silence as your breath caught in your throat. Every inch of your body tensed, though this had yet to cease his quickening thrusts. Your cunt felt too good, too warm, too tight, for him to let up now.

“Noah!” His name finally erupted from you again, just as an unexpected orgasm took charge. Your head tossed back and your hips arched up as much as possible, your pussy now gripping his cock like a vice. Your walls were so strong that you noticed he was finally beginning to break a sweat.

As the climax shook through your body, his motions began to slow before coming to a complete halt. He stared down at you, a fire in his eyes.

“Did I say you could cum?” The question was punctuated with a firm spank to the side of your thigh, a sting radiating outwards that you knew you'd be feeling for some time afterwards.

“Hadn't I just told you that you're meant to listen to me? That I'm the King and you do as I say?”

Noah had shifted your leg off his shoulder and pulled his hips back until he was no longer inside of you. The loss of connection made you whine and pout because one orgasm hadn't been enough. You desperately needed more.

“I couldn't stop it,” you explained while he forced you up, around, and then back down so the front of your body was pressed to the desk.

“You promised you were going to be a good girl.”

There was a bit of rustling from behind you, followed by the faint clink of metal that you recognized from his belt when he had been removing it not long ago. Your thighs pressed together in anticipation for whatever he had planned for you now since you knew that fleeting moment of softness from him was long gone.

“But good girls ask before they cum, and you didn't ask.” The sound of something moving quickly through the air garnered your attention, but a mere second later a sharp sting forced a yelp from you when the folded edge of his belt made contact with your ass. The pain shot right to your core, your cunt clenching eagerly around nothing.

Another crack rang out when the belt again collided with your tender ass cheek. You whimpered and writhed, your hands desperately trying to grab onto something to steady yourself but there was nothing within reach on the desk. While it did hurt, and the pain only worsened with each spank, you still couldn't help but to crave more. Maybe it was because Noah was now rubbing his palm soothingly over the red and welted area, or maybe it was because you liked allowing him this power over you.

You held a power of your own over him as well, whether he wanted to admit it or not. Although now may have not been the time to bring that up.

“Look at how fucking wet you're getting from this,” he mused gleefully as his fingers dipped down to brush along your pussy. He gathered the wetness around his fingertips after sinking his digits into you, though he only graced you with a couple of pumps before their retreat.

Noah leaned over your body so his mouth was at your ear, his wet fingers forcing their way between your lips for you to obediently clean. Which you did without hesitation or complaint, even going so far as to moan softly at the taste of yourself.

“Now, are you going to be my good girl or do I need to punish you a bit more?” He whispered into your ear while lightly brushing your hair back from your face.

You could feel his hard cock between your thighs, teasing you with what you so badly wanted again. This assisted in you making up your mind, despite how much you enjoyed the punishment given.

“I'll be your good girl,” you promised once his fingers were pulled from your mouth.

Noah circled his strong hand around your jaw before placing a firm kiss to the side of your head. “That was the correct answer.”

Gently forcing your body back around to face his, he was careful to then set you on the edge of the desk. You winced at the weight being placed on your abused bottom, and it was only intensified when Noah purposely grasped the exact area, fingertips digging into the welts. There was no room for true pain when it was quickly overpowered by the euphoric sensation of him thrusting into you again.

Christ, if you weren't already dead then this man surely would've been the death of you.

Both hands squeezed your hips as he helped drag you along his cock, maneuvering your body in just the right way so he was hitting every spot inside of you that had you gasping for air. Your mind was occupied solely with thoughts of him, especially when taking in how he was gazing at you. It didn't matter that bits of his hair clung to his forehead with sweat or that you could barely take a breath without demanding that he fuck you harder, because Noah was still staring at you like you were the only thing in this entire melancholic universe that mattered.

“You're fucking amazing,” he grunted just as he pushed against your chest to lay you back on the desk again. This allowed him free reign to drive his cock at a maddening pace into your depths, his thrusts relentless to what your mere mortal body could handle.

Did it matter since you were already dead, though? Were you technically a mortal still? So many questions.

Your noises of ecstasy echoed through the study as your cunt throbbed around his twitching cock. The way Noah’s hips began to slow until he was taking long drags out of you, only to roughly thrust forward again, told you that he was close. You weren't sure how you knew, but you did. Just as you somehow knew other things little that would make him tick - both in good and bad ways.

“You look so beautiful like this.”

You couldn't help but to smile through your delightful torment, your body already so sensitive from your previous orgasm and all of the other things Noah had made you feel that night. From his unmatched stamina, so you could assume, to the pain of his belt across your ass that made your cunt clamp tighter around his cock just from thinking about it.

Noah must've noticed because he released a deep growl from his chest, his head now bowed and eyes closed as he continued his unforgiving thrusts.

“Oh!” You gasped the moment his palm pressed against your lower stomach and his thumb made contact with your clit. Your hips jerked and your thighs threatened to close, but his grip on the one only tightened to a harsh squeeze to keep you perfectly spread for him.

“You have to ask.” Noah reminded you, since he was well aware of what your reactions were pointing to.

Your eyes rolled back and your teeth sunk deep into your lower lip, breathless moans escaping one after the other, making it nearly impossible for you to say much of anything.

“Please!” You finally were able to pant out, a faint whine to follow. “Can I cum? Please?”

Noah smirked at your obedience. The sound of your begging only made him drive harder into your core, his thumb still working against your overly sensitive clit.

“Please please please,” the pleading continued in a faint whisper, this being all you could manage out now in a little chant of desperation.

Instead of voicing his approval, he merely gave a single nod just before planting both of his hands on the desk near your head. He was leaning over you now, his hips violently colliding with yours. Dark eyes focused down on your face and you immediately knew he wanted to watch up close as you fell apart for him again.

Your hands ran up his sides and back to clutch his shoulder blades, nails sinking harshly into his inked skin the moment your climax took over. Every inch of your body spasmed beneath his, your knees digging into his hips and nails dragging down his back in a way that made him sharply inhale in an almost hiss.

“Oh my go-!” The cry was nearly completed when his hand covered your mouth, preventing you from voicing the final word. Though this didn't stop you from moaning in a continuous yet muffled fashion as a wave rushed through your body and your cunt hungrily tried dragging in more of his cock.

“Fuck, you're doing so good,” he murmured in a low tone that had your insides melting and your orgasm freely flowing around him. “Fucking hell!”

Noah groaned as his thrusts became a little more sloppy before a final drive forward had him pausing as deep as possible inside of you. The muscles in his arms and shoulders tensed as he erupted, the vein in the side of his neck now more prominent. You couldn't help but to crane your neck forward just a bit in order to sink your teeth into it, bringing forth a moan from him directly into your ear.

Shivers traveled your body from the overly full feeling of him cumming inside of you and filling you to the brim, his arousal mixing with your own and overflowing. Still, your cunt continued to pulse and flutter around his cock, emptying him for all that he was worth. Your hips even rolled up into his again, purposely working yourself along his length simply because you could and because it felt so fucking good to have him stroking your g-spot, no matter how sensitive and spent your body was.

“I told you I could be a good girl,” you breathed against his neck while trailing your lips up in search of his. Noah chuckled into the kiss you eventually indulged him with, his brow finally relaxing now that you had stopped grinding into him and he could properly think.

Lifting his head after you parted from the kiss, he gazed down at you to admire how beautiful you looked with your cheeks flushed and a post-sex glow setting in. It was the first time he had seen you appear genuinely happy since your arrival, and while he of course wanted your body again and again, he also wanted to see that as often as he could.

“Don't think I've forgotten about how you acted at dinner.” His tone was serious only for a fleeting moment. Your eyes widened slightly, the welt on your ass pulsating as if to remind you of the punishments he could make you endure.

Noah cracked a faint grin before dragging his hand along the side of your face and claiming your lips once again. He was then standing to his full height and carefully pulling you to a sitting position along with him, where he slowly pulled himself out from your drenched core. A faint whimper escaped you, though you quickly covered it with a bite to your inner cheek.

“No need to worry about that now. I'll let you know when I'm coming to collect for your defiant behavior.”

Well, that surely made your pussy clench in eager anticipation.

Flexing and rolling his shoulders back, he muttered something about giving him a second and then scurried off, but not before making a quick turn back to kiss you again. As he disappeared, you took this moment to glance around the study. It was one of the many rooms you hadn't really been in before, Noah's bedroom included, because you always felt they were too personal for you to see.

And much to your own shock, Noah never entered your room either. At least you knew he could respect boundaries to a degree. But now? Well, now you weren't so sure what sort of boundaries remained for you two.

Taking in a deep breath, you lifted a hand to gently massage into the back of your neck, just as your eyes swept across the large bookcase that lined one side of the room. Something on one of the shelves immediately acquired your attention: a knife of sorts, a dagger, with rubies embedded in the handle. There was something very familiar about it, so much so that you found yourself slipping from the desk to make your way over to where it was displayed.

“I wasn't sure if you wanted to remain in the clothes you're used to, so I brought that and another option…” his voice grew quieter as it trailed off upon realization that you were no longer on the desk.

Noah's returning presence couldn't pry your eyes away from the dagger, nor could his soft demand for you to tell him what you were doing. Instead, you reached out to lightly trace along the sheath the dagger was housed in before ultimately picking it up and pulling it from the enclosure.

“What is this?”

Noah was by your side within seconds, his hand reaching for the item though you made an abrupt turn to step away from him.

“I need you to give me the dagger now…please. Then, maybe, we can discuss just what it is.”

There was a churning in your stomach and your heart was now beating so loud that you could hear it thumping within your ears. You recognized this dagger despite having only seen it for a few seconds after your captors all but dragged you to your death. A multitude of memories flashed before your sights of this dagger in particular, although in many different scenarios and situations.

Your eyes were pooling with tears as you finally looked up at him, both confusion and hurt written all across your face. It appeared as if Noah wanted to say something but he remained silent, his hand still outstretched like you were actually going to hand the item over to him.

“This was what was used to kill me, Noah. More than once. Why do you have it?”

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thats-a-mood-gabriella · 16 hours

Text

Okay. I kinda want to walk through what I think is happening in each of their heads during the conversation. For my own sake, mainly, but who knows, maybe someone else will find it useful. Spoilers ahead, obviously. (Also fair warning that this is long and I expect nobody to actually read it; this is mostly for me.)

So let's establish first where they are when Blitz arrives.

Blitz hates himself. He's on the path to healing after making up with Fizz, but it is a very long road ahead. So if you can imagine it as a spectrum where "hates self" and "loves self" are on opposite ends, maybe he's not all the way at the hates self end anymore, but he's still pretty darn far over that way. So Blitz is arriving thinking he's unlovable, that he makes everyone's lives worse, and that Stolas is possibly getting bored of him. We also know from his half of the duet that he genuinely looks forward to these full moon nights and likes their arrangement. Makes sense. It provides him with the comfort of what he thinks is the closest he can get to an actual relationship where all he has to give is something he knows that he can and that he's good at (sex). He wants to keep the arrangement going. Yes, for a way to earth, but also for Stolas. This, in Blitz's mind, is the only way he gets to keep him.

Stolas is likely unmedicated for his depression, since this show doesn't show us things like him being out of his pills as just a throwaway joke; it's important. Anyone who has ever had depression knows that it just loves to remind you of the worst things about yourself, most of which aren't even true. It tells you that you're worthless and unlovable. We can see this in the way he's covered everyone but Octavia in the artworks in his home, mirroring Blitz scribbling himself out of photos. He's been in a dark place. But Stolas is also being so brave, ready to ask Blitz to love him anyway. To choose him of his own free will, the way it should've always been. His depression is making it hard, but he's going out on the limb anyway and hoping Blitz will catch him.

"I need it back...permanently."

Blitz starts panicking. He reacts like a puppy that's been told it's a bad dog. He starts promising that he can be good, he can do better. He can fuck Stolas like nobody else can.

Stolas rebuffs the advance and this is interesting to me-- Blitz slips into his dom persona a little, trying to regain control of the situation. He calls Stolas "bitch" and pushes his legs apart, lowers his voice to be seductive. And it alllllllmost works, just for a second, as Stolas blushes and starts to fall under the spell of it all. But then he gets himself back under control and reasserts this new boundary.

Blitz immediately drops the act and starts to beg with genuine distress, tears in his eyes even, and up until this point, I won't argue with you if you try to tell me that it's all about the grimoire. I disagree, but I'll let you get away with telling yourself that. Right up until this point.

Because this is when Stolas holds out the crystal and everything changes.

Their fucking leitmotif or whatever you call it, I don't know music terms, it starts playing, changing from the dramatic, ominous music before. Blitz starts inspecting the crystal like he doesn't believe it's real.

Let's be clear: he knows what an Asmodean crystal is and what it does. He's seen them before at least twice, both in 2x05. So it's not that he's in disbelief or confusion about what it does or that it exists. It's that Stolas is giving it to him that's taking him aback.

"You no longer need my grimoire." "Whaaaat?"

Because all Blitz is hearing is "you don't need me now. I can be rid of you without guilt."

"I don't understand. Why are you giving me this? Am I not fucking you good enough? Because I can always do better."

Let's take a second to pretend we're in a world where Blitz has zero feelings for Stolas. That this has always just been about getting to earth. In that world, Blitz never says this line. In that world, Blitz splits right here. He has the crystal in his hands. He knows what it does. He is officially 100% free at this point.

But we don't live in that universe and this line proves it. Blitz thinks he's being cast aside and instead of seeing it as his chance at freedom from Stolas, he's begging to be kept.

I can do better. Don't throw me away.

"I care...very deeply for you. And I have for some time."

This is the face Blitz makes after that. The entire time Stolas is talking, he keeps looking between Stolas and the crystal while making this face, like he literally can't process what is happening. Of all the things he expected to happen tonight, this wasn't even on the list. And remember: Blitz hates himself. Blitz genuinely believes he is unlovable.

Have you ever experienced something so surreal that it's almost like you left your body during it? Like your brain literally couldn't process that this was happening to you, so it's almost like you dissociate to the point that you feel like you're watching it happen to someone else? Because things like this don't happen! Not to you. These are things you see on TV or hear happening to other people. But to YOU? There's no way it's real.

"You don't have to stay here with me."

He looks ALARMED. Scared. The thought that he's about to lose Stolas genuinely startles him. He doesn't want what he thinks is happening. He doesn't want to be cast aside. If his choice is this or the chains, he'd rather the chains.

But. That's not the choice he's being presented. Because Stolas adds,

"But I want you to."

And Blitz's brain, his traumatized, mentally ill brain...just can not process that. No one wants to keep him. He's a commodity to be bought and sold and has been since his father sold him to Paimon as a child (which, by the way, I'm fairly convinced he thinks was Stolas's idea, not Paimon's). Maybe even before.

So his defense mechanisms kick in from this point on. Default to what's comfortable. It must be a sex thing! There's no way Stolas means this, so it's gotta be some weird roleplay. Well, he can do that! He can swoon and say he loves him (and if that hits a little too close to the truth, then fuck you, no it doesn't) and it's fine because this is fake. This can't be real, because things like this don't happen to someone as "worthless" as Blitz believes himself to be.

Blitz is trying to protect his own heart here, but what Stolas is hearing is rejection. Blitz playing it off as a joke must mean that Stolas is a joke for ever thinking Blitz could love him back. And why would he? Stolas doesn't see himself as lovable, either. One of his earliest memories is of Blitz "using" him to steal from the palace, never knowing that Blitz was only doing so on his father's orders, just as Blitz probably doesn't know that he was bought on Paimon's order, not Stolas's. He's a commodity, too.

Stolas's depression immediately puts him in a place where he can't see past his own pain and self-loathing. Blitz not immediately jumping into his arms must mean that all the worst things he thinks about himself are true. Blitz sees him as the monster he fears he is.

So he pulls himself together and starts to walk. And again, Blitz could leave here if he didn't care.

But the strangest thing happens. Blitz realizes that Stolas meant it. He even asks,

"Wait, you were being serious? Hold on, Stolas. What the fuck?"

He's trying to talk it out. He's trying to have the conversation. He's hurt and confused and in disbelief but he's not running from this. He's not letting Stolas walk away from him because he wants Stolas, and he's actively trying to keep him. They have to talk this through, and Blitz of all people is the one trying to pull Stolas back into the conversation.

"The fact that you couldn't believe that I could have these feelings about you, the fact that your first instinct is that it's always about sex, that's enough to know what this is."

See, what we have to remember is that Stolas doesn't have all the information we do. He hasn't seen the crossed out pictures, he didn't witness the flashback to the fire that killed Blitz's mom. Stolas hasn't watched Blitz cry himself to sleep or drink himself into a stupor after what he perceived as a public rejection at Ozzie's. Neither of them have all the information about each other that we, the audience do.

So when Stolas, who doesn't know that Blitz hates himself and thinks himself unlovable, hears that Blitz thinks there's no way that Stolas could love him, what Stolas hears is "you, Stolas, are an unlovable monster in my eyes."

It just confirms all the worst things Stolas thinks about himself. It's a literal, "it's not you, it's me," situation, but Stolas can't see that because he doesn't have all the information.

And here's what's even more interesting. Blitz doesn't think it's over like Stolas does. He's not rejecting Stolas.

"Fuck you, Stolas. You spring this feelings bullshit on me, are you fucking kidding? Can I get a fucking minute to think after everything you put me through, you pompous, rich, asshole?"

This is Blitz saying that this is all very unexpected for him, but he's not saying no. He's saying "give me a minute, let me think. Don't take my first reaction in the way that you are. I was surprised. I was in disbelief. Give me a fucking minute to PROCESS."

But by this point, it's too late. Stolas's self-loathing has taken the driver's seat in his brain and all he can hear is that Blitz hates him, that he is unlovable, that he's a monster, that he's all the things he feared were true, and the person telling him that is the person he cared (second) most for in the entire world.

Blitz's defense mechanism is fight. Stolas's is flight. And so when Blitz unloads on him like that, Blitz is trying, in his own messed up way, to have the conversation. To work this out. To be honest for once and see if they can get somewhere now that the dam has been broken. While Stolas...his instinct is to flee. And since he's the one with the magic portals, guess what happens?

"I didn't realize you think so low of me."

You can tell by Blitz's reaction that he realizes they're not having the conversation he thinks they are. He realizes in that instant that Stolas isn't going to yell back with him. They're not going to scream at each other until they get it all out of their systems and reach a catharsis. He's hurt Stolas, maybe in a way that they can't come back from, and he immediately shifts his demeanor.

"Stolas, wait. I'm so--"

And then it's over. He's been kicked out of the palace. Thrown aside, just like he feared he would be.

And each of them are left feeling like the other thinks they're a monster, because neither of them realize that the only person who thinks they're a monster is themself.

I gotta go lie down, jfc.

#helluva boss spoilers #stolitz #why did i do this to myself

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i-yap · 2 days

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Thinking about the wedding ask you answered before but what if Grayson proposed to his s/o and his s/o already bought a ring to propose to him as well? Like that would be so cute 😭💕

Hey sorry I'm a little late, in responding, I usually have a couple meetings on Thursday and after human interaction I'm too dead to do anything.

omg your request is so monica and chandler idk why..like that scene she proposes and..yea . Thats a really cute idea.

Dick grayson x reader

Some may consider being friends with your boyfriends ex weird, but barbara and kori were still a part of his teams and they knew what grayson had with you was something special and different. And so you became sort of friends..at least this way you got gossip on grayson. But it was also the reason why you were here, In a jewellery store. looking through wedding bands.

"And then he kept crying "take me to y/n" " laughed kori telling the story of Dick on anesthesia. You laughed back in return"What can I say, the man's a simp". "Yea never really saw him like that you know" replies Kori.

"Like what?" . "Loving someone so much, he was sweet with me, but he never really made effort. I guess I always knew it was a temporary thing. I couldn't even bring up commitment with him, I don't think I even heard him say the word "wedding" the whole time we were together."

"He is a litttle hesitant towards commitment I suppose, its his childhood- all that repressed trauma" you say , trying to cheer her up a little. "But with you it seems like he might even ask you to marry him- though the idea of him asking anyone to marry him sounds crazy"

"Why is that?" you ask

"Dont take me wrong, he loves you but I just cant see him getting down on one knee and -well popping the question"

And so here you are now. Staring at the perfect wedding band set . Was this a little unconventional ..yes. Did you care? Hell no. You knew Dick wanted forever with you. You guys had talked about kids, grandkids, what flowers you want in your wedding. He just wasn't popping the question and if he wasn't going to do it, you would. You understand he has his issues, but he is committed to you, he loves you and you can help him out with this little something.

After that talk with kori you had been monitoring Dick , He did talk a lot about marrying you but never really brought up the actual question. And you didn't want to wait longer. This was the man you wanted to spend forever with..its decided.

So you and dick plan out a perfect date. He was more than excited to make sure everything was perfect- saying he was just excited because you guys haven't had a proper date in while(which is a lie , dick takes you out every week for a fancy date )

But it turns out perfect. By the private beach, a pretty blanket with champagne and food. the sun setting slowly and a chill spring air which makes you sit just a little closer. You take out the ring just as the sun starts setting. Dick looks over perplexed. He looks at the ring, then at you smiling and then ring again. "Dick grayson, I love you. I never thought I'd meet a man like you, I didn't even know they existed. And they don't , you're special to me. You are kind and smart and really hot. There is no one else for me , its just you. Marry me?"

Dick gives the biggest smile, pulls you up onto the sand and get down on his knees before reaching into his pocket and pulling out a ring. "y/n, I guess you beat me to it huh? Ive been carrying this ring for 3 months now waiting for the perfect moment. But every moment with you is perfect, you are perfect for me and you make me want to be the perfect man for you. Ive known that since the first date , I know that right now and I will remember it forever. Will you marry me y/n l/n?"

"First you answer my question" you hiccup, tears welling up in your eyes.

"haha, yes yes I will marry you y/n grayson"

"is this a bad time to mention I don't like your surname"

"We can change it, keep it something you like, like cupcakes..y/n cupcakes" he says tears in his own eyes.

you giggle as you pull him up, sliding the rings onto each others hand and kissing as the sun falls below the ocean's horizon.

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thedeviltohisangel · 3 days

Note

Angry Confession #8 for John and Cas

ANGRY CONFESSION BLURB PROMPT ERA

8. “Tell me how I’m supposed to un-love you, then. Tell me. Spare me.”

a little tease of the wisconsin fight i have been screaming in DMs with @gloryofroses19 about...

also. this might get it's own multi-page interlude and read slightly different. cass might get on that forced march and it won't read exactly like the blurbs. my muses have a mind of their own and i don't try to reel them in. if you ever have a question or wonder how i might see something differently with hindsight, please always reach out!

AND. writing this broke me.

The silence was deafening as Cass felt his words snap across her face. She almost wishes the pain was physical instead of the emotional torment that he was inflicting upon her. At least then she would know how to heal. She would know how to proceed. At least then she could find the courage to fight back and gain control of whatever storm was brewing between them.

"All I know, Cass, is that I want you to be happy. I want you to be free and safe and experience everything life has to offer. I'm not the right person to ensure that for you anymore. I'm not the right person to live life with you anymore. I'm not the right person to," he paused and choked on the words that were tumbling out, "bring home to South Carolina and...you deserve a better man to have children with."

"Don't you dare," she practically spat as she pushed off the wall and took an angry step towards him. "Don't you dare fucking say any of that, John." The letter that caused all of this was still clutched in his hands. She wanted to burn it. She wanted to go back in time and never write it.

"Tell me I'm wrong. Tell me that you haven't noticed how fucked in the head I am. That you haven't stopped sleeping because you're afraid of what I've become at night." His eyes were looking at her wrist. Imagining the way his hands had wrapped around her delicate skin with malice as his nightmares had blurred his capacity to distinguish the past from the present.

"I love you. I love you so much it hurts me and that is the only thing I have been certain of for a very long time." Her fingers wrapped around the footboard of the bed in his childhood room. There was so much of him ingrained in these walls that it was dizzying. She had been giddy upon their arrival to Wisconsin, anxious to see him reunite with his mother and sisters. Anxious to get him back to his roots in the hopes it would heal the uncertainty that had settled over him since the morning after Gale's wedding. "You are exactly the man I want to bring home to South Carolina. Exactly the father I want to give my children. Exactly the person I want to experience everything in life with. All the pain and all the happiness. None of it means anything without you." She took another step but he stood and she paused.

"I'm setting you free. Free from me and this marriage and all the memories of what happened over there that I keep drudging up for you."

"I don't want that," she cried. "I am not asking for any of that!"

"Someone is going to make you so happy one day." His hands were shaking and he knew he needed to leave this house before he could let the tears in his eyes fall. "Someone who doesn't have demons in their head. Someone who doesn't have blood on their hands and doesn't have to worry about staining you when he holds you."

“Tell me how I’m supposed to un-love you, then. Tell me. Spare me," she yelled as she found the courage to hit him in the chest. "Tell me how you expect me to move on from our nights in the flower field and how I am supposed to pretend that London meant nothing to me and tuck away everything that happened in Germany into a box. No one else will ever understand me, John. No one is ever going to make me feel a pin prick of what you do." She beat her palms against his chest until all the anger left her chest and she collapsed as it was replaced by despair. He let a tear drop onto the carpet next to her.

"I love you, Sp-" He stopped as the term of endearment tried to slip out. She couldn't bring herself to look at him. John stepped past her and stood in the doorway, not flinching when he saw his sisters scurry into their rooms. "One day, when you hold your precious child and don't see any of me inside of them, you'll know we are doing the right thing. And I just know you are going to be the best fucking mother in the entire world." Oh how he had dreamed of watching her become a mother. Watching her with their baby. Their baby that looked like a perfect combination of the two of them and was a physical embodiment of the love they had for each other. How he had spent the sleepless nights in Germany thinking of their names and how they would feel on his tongue. Cass was, is, a deity. She would be raising angels in her image and he couldn't not taint them with the horrors that lived inside of him. Couldn't risk any of it seeping into them.

"It won't be worth it without you," she mumbled as she stared where he had been in shock. "Life without you won't be worth living." If he stayed any longer, he'd never be able to leave.

So, without a glance back, he stepped out of the room. And down the stairs.

And into the night.

#john egan #john egan fanfiction #masters of the air #masters of the air fanfiction #callum turner #answered #cass and bucky #john egan x oc

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pinkandpurple360 · 7 hours

Note

here's a recap if you don't wanna watch! (spoilers!)

starts on the duet, basically unchanged from the con preview clip that I could tell

cut to the CHERUBs who are stuck on Earth and scamming people for money, the purple deer one has reservations but the other two are losing their morals. they get captured by DHORKs who have now got massive government funding I guess because they captured demons on tape? anyway they're working on this stargate-like portal to Hell and can only make a little one so they give the CHERUBs robot suits to go through and kill IMP for them (also DHORKs have a line of...pope robots? idk why they looked like that, I guess holy=hurts demons?)

cut back to office, Blitzo is dressed up for night with Stolas but is only enthused about having sex with him. He's also happy that Stolas has been letting him have months off (lol) but gets nervous about the business when Loona says Stolas pulling away means he's bored of him

he goes looking around town for more sex toys to impress Stolas with while CHERUB tail him, thinking he's gonna kill a human soul on earth with the things he buys. He goes to Fizz who gives him a massive sex toy which was blurred out so idk what it was supposed to be (Fizz calls him buddy! also there's definite sexual tension when Fizz shows him some blindfolds but it's a very small thing in Blitzo's animation so we're probably not supposed to read much into it)

CHERUB see massive sex toy, assume murder weapon and are gonna fight Blitzo when IMP get in the way. they'd been tailing Blitzo so he doesn't mess up (and I quote) "their meal ticket" [Stolas]. fight ensues, Blitzo comically doesn't notice it's going on right behind him, etc. IMP beat CHERUB and throw them back through earth portal

scene where Blitzo & Stolas talk finally happens. Blitzo tries to impress Stolas with sex toys, Stolas retreats to book shelf and gives him crystal. Blitzo is confused & desperate not to lose book during this scene, even saying 'I'll do anything'. Stolas says full moon deal was wrong, shouldn't have bound Blitzo to him, doesn't say he's sorry directly or apologize for using Blitzo's class to get sex out of him, doesn't apologize for using him being shot at to do it.

Blitzo assumes Stolas is doing roleplay and tries to join in and Stolas immediately gets offended and leaves the room, telling Blitzo (who follows) that he's hurt Blitzo assumed it was a sex thing and he wasn't sincere. pacing wise this happens pretty quick, like Stolas literally just dumped this all on him (which Blitzo points out)

Blitzo gets mad and yells at Stolas for treating him the way he did his servants, calls him an asshole (doesn't get to call him out for the whole 'leveraged my life being in danger' thing though...typical...)

Stolas immediately breaks down in tears and is all like 'I think so highly of you but you think so low of me!' and uses magic to dump Blitzo at his front door right as it sounds like Blitzo is trying to say 'Stolas, I'm sorry' (kill me)

smash to end credits, no music

He's also happy that Stolas has been letting him have months off (lol) but gets nervous about the business when Loona says Stolas pulling away means he's bored of him

they'd been tailing Blitzo so he doesn't mess up (and I quote) "their meal ticket" [Stolas]. fight ensues, Blitzo comically doesn't notice it's going on right behind him, etc. IMP beat CHERUB and throw them back through earth portal

God that’s fucking. horrible. they’re all complacent in their ‘friend’ being pimped out and only care about themselves, not him. Abuse enablers. I swear to fuck it’s only striker the “villain” who says he’s treated like a plaything and deserved better??? CHRIST. The entire world literally revolves around making stolas happy and if you make him unhappy your world is over. I hate this bastard but now I find the rest of IMP disgusting as well. They don’t give a fuck about blitz and shouldn’t bother pretending they can point out his flaws to him, while this is who they are. The show admitted he’s been extorting him for sex, conveys the pressure he’s under to give stolas whatever gratification he wants so he and his family can stay alive, has him lash out at the manipulation, but then because he made stolas cry, he’s wrong.

But again, this is all part of Medranos theme that poor people and minorities are bad, scheming, thieving people, and white men are misunderstood, need love, have so much on their shoulders, and are so wronged by the world.

ANYWAYS

ROBOT BATTLE ROBO FIZZES VS EARTH ROBOTS Trust.

Kindve sad missed opportunity for fizz to interact with MnM and Loona. Id want it to be a slow paced scene over a random skit or worse, offscreen meeting.

The Cherubs were massively shoe horned in.

#helluva boss critical

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hookhausenschips · 6 hours

Text

Tangled In My Soul {JB22}

500 Follower Special!!!

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Summary: Y/N struggled with feelings of loneliness and public scrutiny while waiting for Jenson, but during their drive home, he reassured her of his love and commitment. They spent the evening reconnecting emotionally and physically, finding solace and happiness in each other's presence.

Taglist

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Y/N was sitting in the car park outside of the Sky Studios where Jenson had been working all week when he got out of the building and walked towards the car. He had been gone since Monday morning and they hadn't really spoken much over the weekend, it had been hectic with him traveling up north to see his family and then having to go back down south for work again.

She could feel herself getting more and more angry every day that went past, especially since she knew he would be talking about her on the television. She didn't like hearing other people talk about her behind closed doors let alone millions of people watching her live. She knew it was something he couldn't avoid but it still hurt.

She tried not to take it personally but sometimes it was hard, she wasn't used to this kind of attention. She wasn't even sure if she wanted this kind of attention.

Jenson sat next to her and kissed her cheek before opening the door for her. They both climbed into the car and buckled up before starting their drive home. It was always so quiet during these drives.

“How did it go today?” Y/N asked breaking the silence between them.

“Fine, just another day at the office.” Jenson replied looking over at her. “How have you been?”

“I've been fine thanks. I’ve missed you.” Y/N said giving him a smile and leaning over to kiss his lips softly. He smiled back and placed his hand on top of hers.

They carried on driving in silence for a few minutes until Jenson spoke again. “I know it’s been hard this week and I’m sorry for leaving you alone for so long, we don’t get many chances to spend time together anymore.” He looked over at her again. “And I know it’s difficult to hear everyone talking about you all the time, it must be hard.”

“It’s okay Jens, you can't help it. It’s your job after all. But I do miss spending time with you.” Y/N gave him a little smile.

“I know you do. We should go somewhere nice soon, get away from everything and relax. Maybe we could even try and make some memories.” Jenson smiled back at her and turned his head to look ahead onto the road.

Y/N nodded but didn’t say anything else, she could feel her eyes starting to fill with tears. She didn’t want to cry in front of Jenson but she also felt like she needed to let it out, she was just so upset.

“Hey what’s wrong? Are you ok?” Jenson reached across the seat and placed his hand on her thigh, rubbing it gently.

Y/N sniffed trying to fight back the tears. “I-it’s nothing I’m just a bit sad that’s all.” Her voice cracked as she spoke.

“Don’t cry please, it’ll only make things worse. You can tell me what’s going on, I won’t judge you.” Jenson squeezed her thigh slightly, trying to reassure her.

Y/N wiped the tears away from her face and took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. “I’m just tired of people making fun of me all the time, saying things about us because of our age difference and that I'm only here because of who you are. It hurts me, it hurts me so much. I love you and I know you love me too but I just wish people would stop hurting me like this.”

Jenson pulled over to the side of the road and put his hand around her waist, pulling her closer to him. “Listen to me Y/N, I need you to listen to me very carefully.”

“Yes, yes.” Y/N sniffed again and wiped the last remaining tears away.

“I love you more than anything else in this world, you mean everything to me. I would do anything for you. And I know what it feels like to have people say bad things about you all the time, I know how it makes you feel. So trust me when I say that those people don't matter, they are nothing compared to what we have.” Jenson stroked her hair and ran his thumb along the back of her neck. “I know it’s hard but you can't let them get to you, you have to ignore them or else they will win.”

Y/N nodded slowly, taking in everything he said. “But I just want people to like me, I want them to accept me and understand why we are together.”

“That’s not going to happen anytime soon Y/N, no matter what happens or what you do people will always find something to say about us. Even if we were perfect they would still find something.” Jenson kissed the top of her head and rested his chin on top of it. “So please stop worrying about what other people think about us, focus on what matters most; us.”

“But I'm scared of losing you Jens, I don’t want you to leave me.” Y/N buried her face into his chest and wrapped her arms around him.

“Oh darling, you will never lose me. You are the most important thing in my life right now and I wouldn’t ever dream of leaving you, you mean too much to me for that.” Jenson rubbed her back soothingly. “I promise I will never leave you, you are stuck with me forever.” He laughed lightly and kissed her forehead.

Y/N lifted her head off his chest and smiled at him, “I love you Jens.”

“I love you too, my angel.” He smiled back at her and leaned forward to kiss her lips. Their lips moved against each other softly and lovingly as they enjoyed the moment. After a while they broke apart and Jenson started the engine again.

“We should probably get going, we don’t want to be late for dinner tonight.”

“Yeah, I’m hungry.” Y/N grinned and snuggled up close to him as he started driving again.

They drove back home in silence but it wasn’t awkward this time. There was no tension between them, just pure happiness and contentment.

* * *

When they arrived back at their house they went straight through to the kitchen and started cooking dinner together. Jenson was making spaghetti bolognese while Y/N was making garlic bread. It was one of their favorite meals to cook together, they both loved Italian food and it was easy enough for either of them to make.

They chatted happily as they cooked, sharing stories about their days and laughing together. They both enjoyed spending time together like this, it was rare for them both to have free time at the same time so when they did they made the most of it.

After finishing their meal they cleaned up the dishes and then headed upstairs to their bedroom. They changed into their pajamas and climbed into bed together under the covers. They lay facing each other on opposite sides of the mattress and held hands tightly as they watched TV.

Jenson turns and looks at Y/N, his eyes memorizing every detail about the woman who has held him captivated in every waking moment since they met. Y/N looks up and blushes at the attention. "What are you staring at?" she whispered.

Jenson smiles and reaches over to run his fingers through her hair. "My beautiful girl," he murmurs. "I am simply admiring my favorite view."

Y/N blushes deeper and leans into his touch. "Are you going to stare at me all night?" she teases.

Jenson laughs and shakes his head. "No, my dear," he replies. "There is something else I intend to do instead."

Y/N arches an eyebrow at him. "Oh yeah? What might that be?"

Jenson grins mischievously and sits up. He moves over to sit beside her and begins to undress her. "Well," he says, "I want to show you exactly how much you mean to me."

Y/N watches as he removes her clothes, leaving her in nothing but her panties and bra. He runs his hands over her body, caressing her skin and causing goosebumps to rise on her skin. She shivers with pleasure. "You're so beautiful," he whispers.

Y/N smiles and leans into his touch. "Thank you," she breathes. "You're not so bad yourself."

Jenson laughs and pulls her close, pressing his lips against hers in a passionate kiss. His tongue dances with hers, exploring every inch of her mouth. Y/N moans into his mouth, her body responding to his touch.

Jenson breaks the kiss and looks down at her, smiling. "You're absolutely stunning," he murmurs. "And I'm going to treat you like the queen that you are."

Y/N blushes and looks down, feeling shy. "Thank you," she whispers.

Jenson kisses her forehead before he began his descent below, kneeling between Y/N's spread legs. He leans down and presses his lips against her clit, flicking it with his tongue. Y/N gasps and arches her back, pushing her hips up against his mouth.

Jenson chuckles and continues licking her, using his hands to massage her breasts. Y/N moans louder, her breathing becoming ragged. "Oh god," she pants. "Jensen... fuck!"

Jenson starts sucking harder on her clit and massaging her breasts more forcefully. Y/N cries out and wraps her legs around his head, holding him against her. "I'm gonna cum," she gasps. "Oh god, I'm gonna cum!"

Jensen continues pleasuring her, his tongue working furiously as he brings her to orgasm. Y/N screams as she cums, her juices flowing freely onto his tongue.

He climbs back onto the bed and straddles Y/N, pressing his cock against her entrance. "Ready?" he asks.

Y/N nods and spreads her legs wider, inviting him inside her. Jenson pushes himself into her wet heat, groaning as he fills her completely. "Darling I don't think I'll ever get over this feeling."

Y/N gasps and wraps her arms around him, burying her face in his shoulder. "Mmm," she moans. "That feels so good."

Jenson smiles, "Yeah?' as he slowly drags his cock in and out of her tight pussy. "You're so fucking beautiful," he grunts. "You feel amazing."

He wanted to take her apart slowly.

He wanted her to be able to remember this night forever.

He wanted to make sure that she remembered that she was his. That she belonged to him, and only him.

Tonight was about making love. Not fucking.

Jenson pushed himself in and out of Y/N's wetness, moving faster as she began to moan and writhe beneath him. He leaned down and captured her lips in a searing kiss, his tongue dancing with hers as he continued thrusting into her.

"Fuck," she gasped. "You feel so good."

Jenson smiled against her lips, "Good?" He asked, before kissing her again. "I thought you were going to say something better than that."

"You're being ridiculous." Y/N pouted.

"Am I?" Jenson raised an eyebrow. "Do you want me to prove it?" He asked, smirking.

"Prove it? Prove what?" Y/N frowned.

Jensen laughed, "That you're not the only one who can give you orgasms." He leaned down and sucked on her nipple, his hands gripping her hips as he continued pumping into her.

Y/N cried out, her head falling back against the pillow. "Oh god, Jens..."

"Shh," Jenson soothed, kissing her throat as he thrust harder. "Just enjoy it baby."

Y/N moaned and threw her head back, arching her back as she welcomed him inside her. "Harder!" She cried. "Please!"

Jenson complied, pounding into her with renewed vigor. He could feel her walls clenching around his cock, squeezing him tightly. "That's it, baby..." He growled. "Take it all!"

He leaned down and pressed his lips to hers, kissing her deeply. Y/N moaned into his mouth as he began thrusting into her harder and faster. He gripped her hips tightly and pounded into her relentlessly, his balls slapping against her ass.

Y/N cried out as the pressure built inside her, her walls contracting around his shaft. She came hard, screaming his name as her juices flowed out onto his cock. Jenson groaned and continued thrusting into her, drawing out her orgasm. Jenson slowed his pace, allowing her to recover before finally pulling out of her.

Finally, he released her hips and collapsed onto the bed, panting heavily. Y/N lay beside him, trembling and covered in sweat. He pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her, holding her tightly as they recovered from their intense session.

"Wow," Y/N said, finally able to speak again. "That was incredible."

Jensen chuckled and kissed her forehead. "I'm glad you enjoyed it," he said, "but we're not done yet." He rolled over and pinned her to the bed, looking down at her hungrily.

"What do you mean?" Y/N asked, surprised.

Jensen grinned, "I mean that I'm not finished with you yet. I plan on showing you all night just how much I love you." He lowered his head and kissed her collarbone, then trailed his tongue down her stomach. He paused to nip at her navel before continuing further down.

Y/N gasped as his mouth found its way to her core. His tongue flicked over her clit, sending delicious waves of pleasure through her body. She arched her back, pushing herself against his mouth.

Jensen chuckled against her skin and continued eating her out, alternating between licking and sucking her clit. He slid a finger inside her, pumping it in and out slowly as he worked on bringing her to climax.

Y/N moaned and writhed beneath him, her hands gripping the sheets tightly. "Oh god..." She whimpered. "Don't stop... please don't stop!"

Jensen chuckled again, "As if I would ever stop," he murmured against her skin. He added another finger, scissoring them inside her as he licked her clit faster and harder.

Y/N screamed as she came, her walls contracting tightly around his fingers. Jenson groaned and continued pleasuring her, drawing out her orgasm as he brought her to climax once again.

Finally, he removed his fingers and crawled up her body, positioning himself above her. "Now," he said, "let's finish what we started earlier." He leaned down and captured her lips in a passionate kiss.

Y/N moaned into his mouth, wrapping her arms around him and pulling him close. Jenson smiled against her lips and began thrusting into her again.

"My darling, you will never be unloved by me. You are too well tangled with my soul." Jenson said as he slowly thrusted in and out of Y/N, looking down at her with adoration. "You are my sunflower."

Y/N smiled at him, "And you are mine," she murmured, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him down for a kiss.

Jensen smiled against her lips, "Of course I am," he murmured, "I'll always be yours."

They kissed passionately for several minutes before breaking apart to catch their breath. Y/N smiled up at him, "I love you so much, Jens."

Jenson smiled back at her, "And I love you more than anything, my darling." He leaned down and kissed her again, slower this time.

Y/N sighed contentedly, "That was amazing." She murmured, wrapping her arms around his neck and resting her head on his shoulder.

Jenson chuckled, "I'm glad you enjoyed it," he said, "but we're not done yet." He leaned down and captured her lips in a passionate kiss.

Y/N moaned into his mouth, wrapping her arms around him and pulling him close. Jenson smiled against her lips and began thrusting into her again, picking up where they left off.

They fucked for hours, pausing only to catch their breath before resuming their passionate lovemaking. Finally, they collapsed onto the bed, exhausted but satisfied. Jenson wrapped his arms around Y/N and held her close, kissing her forehead tenderly.

"I love you," he whispered. "More than anything in the world."

Y/N smiled up at him, "And I love you too," she murmured, "more than words can express."

Jenson smiled back at her, "Goodnight, my darling." He whispered. "Sleep tight."

Y/N yawned sleepily and snuggled up against him, wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head on his chest. "Goodnight," she murmured. "Sweet dreams."

Jenson chuckled and kissed her forehead, "Sweet dreams indeed," he whispered. He closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep, dreaming of their perfect future together.

* * *

Bonus; Y/N woke up the next morning to the sound of birds chirping outside her window. She stretched languidly, enjoying the warmth of the sunlight streaming in through the windows.

She glanced over at Jenson, who was still asleep beside her. She smiled and leaned over to kiss him gently on the cheek.

Jenson stirred and opened his eyes, smiling at her. "Good morning," he said sleepily.

Y/N snuggled closer to him, savoring the peaceful moment. "Good morning," she whispered back. "Did you sleep well?"

Jenson nodded, wrapping his arm around her. "Yeah, I did. How about you?"

"Perfectly," she replied, resting her head on his chest. "I love waking up next to you."

He kissed the top of her head. "Me too."

The two of them lay there for a few more minutes, enjoying the tranquility before the day fully began. Eventually, Y/N sighed and sat up, looking down at Jenson with a playful grin. "What do you want for breakfast?"

Jenson chuckled. "Surprise me."

Y/N got out of bed and padded to the kitchen, her mind buzzing with possibilities. She decided to make pancakes, knowing they were one of Jenson's favorites. As she whisked the batter, she hummed softly, feeling a sense of contentment she hadn't felt in a long time.

Jenson joined her a little while later, wrapping his arms around her from behind. "Smells amazing," he murmured into her ear.

She turned her head to kiss him on the cheek. "Almost ready. Can you set the table?"

"Of course," he replied, grabbing the plates and cutlery.

They worked together seamlessly, the kitchen filled with the sounds of laughter and the clinking of dishes. As they sat down to eat, Y/N felt a surge of happiness, grateful for the simple yet perfect moments like these.

After breakfast, they decided to take a walk in the park. The fresh air and the vibrant colors of spring invigorated them. They held hands, talking about everything and nothing, enjoying each other's company.

When they returned home, Jenson pulled Y/N close and looked into her eyes. "I don't know what the future holds," he said softly, "but as long as we're together, I know it'll be amazing."

Y/N's heart swelled with love. "I feel the same way," she said, kissing him deeply. "Here's to many more mornings like this."

==================================

JB22 Taglist: @tallrock35, @yourbane, @lightdragonrayne, @evie-119, @asparklysoul, @miarabanana

F1 Taglist: @hiireadstuff, @really-fucking-tired, @donteventry-itdude, @spookystitchery

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justanancientfangirl · 20 hours

Text

Oof.

Helluva Boss's 2x8 had some ups and downs for sure.

Cletus' voice makes me want to tear my ears off . Not relevant to anything, just...maybe let the goat girl have more lines next time.

Why does IMP think Blitzø is gonna mess it up? I mean they all know he's a mess, but it's been going just fine for a while. Not super important really, just thought it was a bit deus ex machina that they were there, even if the fight was lit.

As far as Blitzø and Stolas...both have valid points. In this particular case though, though I feel bad for Stolas, Blitzø I think has a bit more of a leg to stand on?

Probably an unpopular opinion, but hear me out.

Stolas has been planning this for a while. He's been all in his feelings, parsing through what he wants and what he feels and why. He's been doing a TON of soul searching. Which is excellent! It's growth! We love to see it.

Before that though, everything we see him say to Blitzø is a little condescending, or in the context of their deal. He only really seemed to start wanting to get to know Blitzø at all in the Ozzie episode, but we don't really see them talk much except in Seeing Stars, when he is more worried about getting Octavia back than anything. And when they do talk, Stolas is kind of snippy, except when he is being overtly sexual

The point being: though we know Stolas has been thinking about this deal for sometime, and know he has come to some conclusions about the whole thing, he hasn't really seemed to change much in how he outwardly treats Blitzø.

He has been telling Blitzø he doesn't have to come since he got hurt (I am guessing) but suddenly asks him to come back? It seems like Blitzø hasn't been getting any since he stopped sleeping with Stolas. Or at least, nothing that he's as excited for, even if he talks a bit game about it being for work.

He is worried that he isn't good enough in general, and spends the whole episode getting things he thinks Stolas will like. He knows he doesn't like beads, knows he will like a giant dildo, he likes the fancy stretchy harness and the rhinestone blindfolds...like, he is actively trying to make sure that Stolas has a good time. So he keeps him around. And we, the audience, know it's not just to keep the grimmoire.

So Stolas gives Blitzø a panic attack by first requesting the book back permanently, saying that their deal is off. Anything after that, Blitzø was never going to hear right away, because not only will it feel like Stolas is throwing him away, he's also taking away everything Blitzø has built for himself.

Stolas does give him the crystal and explain what it is and what it does, but Blitzø is still processing 'give me the book back permanently ' and probably re-living every time Stolas has reminded him of their differences in station, called him a 'plaything' or a 'little imp'.

He and Stolas have never really talked. Every time they got close, Stolas backtracked. So suddenly Stolas is being really serious and emotional, and is all dressed in his finest clothing and telling Blitzø that the arrangement is over ... Yikes.

The thing is, Blitzø is totally right to need a minute to process. Stolas drops a bombshell, gets upset when Blitzø treats it like part of the game they've BEEN playing, because there's no reason for Blitzø to assume that they are doing emotions now.

Then, when Blitzø realizes that Stolas was serious he calls Stolas out for just dismissing him when he didn't react the way Stolas wanted. Stolas has had time to process his emotions, Blitzø hasn't. It's not fair to just sweep away and say 'well, good luck, see you never, guess you don't feel for me' like...way to put words in his mouth, Stolas.

And then when Blitzø demands to talk about it, when he lashes out and accuses Stolas of treating him like he is nothing just like all the other royals, Stolas portals him out of the house.

Like... Stolas didn't want to take advantage of the power imbalance anymore, right? The point was supposed to be to give Blitzø a choice. And then, as soon as he gives Blitzø the crystal, and Blitzø doesn't react in the exact way Stolas wants, he makes yet ANOTHER unilateral decision.

He didn't even give them a chance to talk about it like adults. Not that Blitzø was going to talk about it like an adult, he was probably going to yell some more, and insult Stolas more too, but at least at first, after he realized that Stolas was serious, he DID seem like he would have been amenable to a conversation.

He didn't start yelling till Stolas swept out of the room and didn't look back.

And then, Stolas just makes the decision for him AGAIN, and portals him away. Stolas is devastated, and hurt that it seems like Blitzø thinks really lowly of him, but...he's also very much doing exactly the same thing that he has always done.

He hasn't lessened the power imbalance at all. He's just reminded Blitzø of how deep that gulf really is. He didn't even ask him to leave, just forced it on him, which is kind of shady.

Also, it's not like Stolas has ever been particularly kind to any of the other imps-not his employees (IMPloyees, lol) not Moxie and Millie...he is still kind of an asshole to other imps Blitzø knows, and being someone's exception is...not really a great feeling.

This post got away from me.

Basically though, it distills to Stolas said he wanted to give Blitzø a choice and have them be equals, but as soon as things didn't go the way he wanted, he shut Blitzø down immediately and made a unilateral decision for the both of them. That's not something partners do. If he had talked with Blitzø on LITERALLY any other day, had offered the crystal first, had allowed them to make a decision together...THEN I would be a little more on his side here. He is allowed to be devastated and hurt by Blitzø's words. He's allowed to feel rejected. But he is not without fault in this. They've been shit at communicating from Day 1. If this is gonna be endgame, they HAVE to do better. And Stolas can't escape from painful conversations by magically transporting Blitzø away when Blitzø can never hope to reciprocate that kind of treatment.

#blitzø #stolas #stolitz #helluva boss #helluva boss 2x8 #helluva spoilers

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making-the-crypt-rock · 3 days

Text

Lena, the Werewolf

Monster x human reader (wlw)

Mostly safe for work(nudity, depictions of a strap on), but trigger warning for domestic abuse.

Escaping a bad situation leads you to the small town of Denizen, where the people are hiding more secrets than just a beautiful state park. It's here that you meet Lena, the best bartender you've ever met.

(I'd also like to shout out @momolady , as this piece was inspired by characters in her Hearthway Hollow section)

"Finally away. Finally, I've gotten away." That's all I can think, as I speed down the road. As I wipe the last of the tears from my eyes, I try to control my breathing. Fortunately, I haven't passed any hidden police cars. The way I was driving, I would have been pulled over, for sure. Then again, maybe cops who didn't know my ex would take me seriously.

With clearer eyes, I catch sight of a speed limit sign. I slow down to match the thirty mile per hour limit. I figure that I must be getting close to a town. I'm not even sure where I am, right now. I just ran out of my apartment, got in my truck, and sped off. I didn't even have time to grab clothes, this time. He was so mad... I couldn't stay there. I can only imagine the state that my apartment's in, now. Caleb probably tossed the place and broke all my stuff. It's probably for the best that the majority of my most prized possessions are at my parents' house. But I definitely won't have my computer or a lot of the pictures I had hanging on my walls, when I go back. I shiver at the thought of him still punching holes in my kitchen.

I'm shaken from my thoughts, when I pass a sign. It says, "Welcome to Denizen. Home of Nethermoore State Park." The green of the basic road sign stands out against the fall colors painting the woods around me, making it hard to miss. I don't think I've ever heard of this town, let alone the park. Coming around the corner and over a small bridge, I'm met with a quaint town. Right away, I can identify a coffee shop, hardware store, gas station, grocery store, and a bar, most importantly. The lights on the street have hanging baskets decorated in autumn fashion, with fake, orange leaves and little pumpkins. There's not a stop light, even on the main road. This place is so much smaller than Stillwater.

I pull my truck into a space next to The Raven bar and grill. It stands out pretty well and has a very charming look to it, as it seems it's designed to look like a log cabin. When I park, I notice an older man leaning against the wall, smoking a cigarette. He looks at my truck, before looking in at me. Then, he just looks away, taking a drag. Now parked, I take the chance to look at my phone. Fifteen missed calls, fifteen voicemails, and fifty-seven unread messages, all from Caleb. However, there are also a couple texts from my mom, wondering where I am and if I'm alright. Caleb must have called her to see if I was hiding with her and Dad, again. Hiding there didn't go well, the last time, though. He almost fought my dad to get to me. I'm pretty sure he'd do far worse, this time.

I send her back, "I'm alright, Mom. He's upset, because I finally told him that we're over and that I'm going to be moving out of my apartment and away from him, as soon as I can. It's finally going to be over. I'm going to be staying the night, out of town, but I'll stop by after I go collect my things, tomorrow." I watch the text bubble for "someone is typing" dance for a moment, before her reply pops up. She tells me that she loves me and that she's proud of me for finally leaving him. She tells me to stay safe and that she'll see me, tomorrow.

I store my phone back in my pocket and hop out of the truck. I hadn't gotten the chance to eat the dinner I'd made, and now I'm getting hungry. The smoker looks me up and down and nods at me, but gets a bit of a concerned look on his face.

"You alright, Miss?" he asks.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, just getting through a bit of a rough patch. I'll be fine," I reply.

"Well, this would be the place to help with rough patches," he says, pointing his thumb over his shoulder at The Raven. "But this is also pretty good and you look like you could use it." He fishes a tissue out of the pocket of his jean jacket and hands it to me. I take it and wipe the last of the moisture from my eyes and wipe my nose up, thanking him.

"No problem, miss. I'm Elijah, by the way. I own the grocery, next door, if you need anything, while you're here." Elijah smiles, kindly. He reminds me of my dad, in a way; sturdy build with dark hair and kind eyes. He's the kind of friendly that makes you feel calm.

"Also, miss, and not to pry on your business, but what brings you to town? Camping out the rough patch in the park or you just come for the pour?" he jokes, taking another drag from his cig.

"Oh, I'm YN. YN Green, and I'm just passing though. Needed to get away, for the night, and kinda ended up here by accident," I reply.

He chuckles to himself and replies, "Well, Ms. Green, if you believe the old folktales, no one ends up in Denizen by accident. Always something to find. Anyways, I'll let you get to finding what you need." I nod and thank him for the help. He nods back with a smile.

When I walk into the bar, a few people glance over at me. The place is warmly lit with hunting and sports decor all over the walls, ranging from old Wild jerseys and a gigantic, framed picture of the old Metrodome to mounted deer and fish. There are a couple TVs, too. All are silent, except for the one displaying a channel for the music playing over the speakers. Many of the tables are full, but I find a small one tucked in the back. The black chair I sit in has a little duct taped patch on it. The sound of bar chatter and 90s country is almost foreign.

Then, an older woman in a black t-shirt with the bar's logo walks over with a laminated menu. "Welcome to The Raven. Can I get you started with anything to drink?"

"Just a water, please," I say with a smile. She studies my face for a moment as she hands me the menu.

"Alright, I'll bring that right over," she says in a cheery tone. I look down at the menu. Burgers and sandwiches line both sides of the menu, with sections for appetizers and daily specials. Today, it's fish fry, like many Midwestern places do on Fridays.

Looking up from the menu, I take another look around. This place is different from my usual hang outs, but not in an uncomfortable way. Certainly, just... different. My eyes stop at the bar, where I notice one of the bartenders is looking at me. She glances down as she hands a customer a beer, but her eyes come back to me. Her short, brown hair is pulled back into a paintbrush of a ponytail, showing off her undercut. Her face is soft, but with a strong jawline. She looks athletic and like she enjoys her time at the gym. I'd bet she could open any jar of pickles she set her mind to.

The waitress comes back over and sets my water down. "Know what you're having, tonight?" I look from her to the menu and order the fish - three pieces with waffle fries, and I ask her to hold the side of coleslaw. She scribbles it all down and nods, taking my menu. "Thank you much. That'll be out in a bit." I nod and try looking back at the bar, but the woman is gone, pry helping someone at a different corner of the bar or checking in with the kitchen. Elijah walks in and takes a seat at the bar, giving me a wave when he sees me.

I pull my buzzing phone back out. Caleb's latest text says, "Where the fuck are you? You need to come back here and take back what you said. We're not over and you better be prepared to apologize, you fucking bitch." My eyes start to water, so I just swipe the notifications away. I open my phone and message my landlord about the situation. A friend of my dad, Mark has been working with me to document everything that's happened and get me out. He wishes he could just move me to his other property, but it's all occupied. With Caleb and I both on the lease, though, he's making sure that all charges for damages and fees for breaking the lease are going to him. He thanks me for the info and says he's going to go over and give him his thirty day notice. I thank him and set my phone down, again.

The waitress comes back over, but not with food. She hands me a glass with what looks like a kiddie cocktail in it.

"I didn't order a drink," I tell her. She lets out a little chuckle.

"No, but someone sent it over. Lena makes a mean Malibu Shirley." I glance over at the bar where the bartender, Lena, is looking at me, again, while she stands by Elijah, who's giving me a toothy grin and doing a goofy, finger twiddle wave. I smile at him, mouth a 'thank you', and thank the waitress. She smiles and walks off, again, towards a table of older folks having a rather jovial night. I take a sip of my drink. Sweet and fruity, not too strong. It would be great blended, on a hot summer day.

As the night winds on, I eat my dinner and stare at my phone, trying to find a local hotel. There's a motel at the edge of the state park, but it says that it doesn't have vacancy. The next closest one is forty-five minutes back the way I came. Far too close. I sigh, wishing I hadn't taken my camping gear out of my truck bed. I send messages to Mark and my parents, getting and giving updates about what's all been happening. Apparently, Mark took the police chief with him, to deliver the papers, and Caleb was detained, after they discovered all the damage. I still don't feel safe enough to go home.

Elijah came and went, telling me to have a good night. I order a few more Shirleys, as the night goes on. The waitress, LouAnne, gives me a polite smile, every time she stops at the table. I think I only heard her raise her voice, once, and it was to tell this old drunk he had to go home. Lena kept looking over at me, but I haven't seen her for a bit. I get lost in my search for a place to stay the night and the warm comfort of coconut rum.

Suddenly, the chair on the opposite side of the table slides out and the bartender takes a seat. "I'd ask if this seat was taken, but I don't think I've seen anyone use it, since you came in. Plus, it's getting close to closing time and I doubt anyones gonna come in just to snatch it," she jokes. "I'm Lena." She's even prettier, up close. I notice the little freckles on her cheeks and the crescent moons on her ear piercings.

"Yeah, the waitress told me your name. You're the bartender that likes to stare," I joke back. Her cheeks turn pink, but she laughs along, shoulders shanking. Her eyes are soft. They're green, like walking through a spring forest. "I'm YN." We shake hands and I can feel just how strong they really are.

"Yeah, ol' Eli told me about you. Said you blew in out of nowhere. He also said you might need a place for the night, and considering you've had a few more of my Shirleys than just the one I sent over, I'm gonna guess a ride somewhere, too." I feel my mouth fall open, ever so slightly. She sent it? Probably just trying to be nice, I suppose.

"You sent it? I thought Elijah did, cuz he saw me when I got here, so I thought he was just trying to help me feel better," I tell her. Her face gets a bit more serious.

"Yeah, I did. Elijah mentioned that you looked a little worse for wear, when you pulled up. Everything ok?" she asks, leaning in and resting her forearms on the table. I feel tears fighting to come out, but I hold myself together. Between the stress and liquor, it's a real battle. The crack in my voice, however is a different story.

Telling her, "I'm fine, just some stuff with my b... My ex." I have to correct myself. He's not my boyfriend, anymore. There's a slight shift in Lena's expression, but it passes quickly. "He's just being a jerk cuz I told him to get lost. But then I got lost and ended up here. Funny how that works." I know I'm rambling, but the words are hard to stop. Her face softens as her eyes scan me. She looks so amused.

"You're a little drunk, aren't you?" Not a question.

"Yes, ma'am. And youuuu started it." I point a finger gun at her and giggle. "You make a good drink." Lena smiles and lets out a soft chuckle.

"I'm flattered," she says, mockingly, placing her finger tips against her chest. Then her tone turns to the edge of flirtatiousness. "It's not every day I get such praise from such a pretty girl." I'm praying that the flush from the alcohol hides my blush.

"I, um... Thanks," I squeak out, causing her to throw her head back with laughter.

"God, that was adorable," she wheezes, trying to compose herself. Pretty, now adorable? I'm not even sure what to truly say, in response. "Ok, ok. Real talk. Eli said you were pry in need of a place to stay the night. Not to be presuming anything, but I've got a spot at my place. I have my basement listed as an Air BnB, and it's open, at the moment. Since it's just the night and short notice, you can just crash down there, if you need. If you found a spot, that's cool, too, but I just want to make sure you get where you're headed, safely." She sounds genuine about the offer. I didn't find a place and I didn't even think to check that site, with it being such late notice.

"Uh... Yeah, that would work for me, if it's not too much trouble. I promise I'll pay you back." Lena puts up a hand and shakes her head

"No need. I'm offering. Now, I get done in thirty, so just hang here, while I finish cleaning up and clocking out," she says. And that's what I do. I sit with my, now, almost dead phone and watch her work. She wipes down the bar and washes her mats, before mopping and taking out the trash. She lifts the large bag like it's nothing and I have to push a thought out of my mind, when I realize that I rocked my hips on the chair. She looks back at me, for a moment, before leaving the room, a strange look in her eyes.

When she and the cook lock up, I head to my truck for my charger and travel toothbrush. I expect her to head for a car, but she just starts walking. I try asking her about it, but she says she lives only a bit down the road and that she just walks.

"Do you want to just drive my truck?" I ask. I'd feel better not leaving it here, if I don't have to." She agrees and we hop in. Lena adjusts the seat back and tilts the mirrors. She rolls the windows down, too, letting the chilly, fresh smelling air in. Then, in no time at all, we pull into the long driveway of a gorgeous two story house. She parks my truck and we hop out.

"Hey there, Toasty," Lena babbles after pushing the door open. She looks back at me with an uncomfortable face. "You don't mind dogs, right?" Then, before I register it, we're both surprised by a very happy Staffordshire terrier bouncing out of the door and jumping up to sniff and lick at my face and hands, letting out a few barks. I laugh at the excitable dog and scratch his ears.

"I love dogs!" I laugh, as the dog sits for pets. "Is this good boy yours?"

"Yeah, he's my buddy." Lena leans down and pats his side. Then, he runs into the yard to do his business, before coming back to us. "Alright, in." He follows her command, trotting back through the door and we both follow.

Lena's home is beautiful. She has many different potted plants in her windows, a spacious living room, and a kitchen that would make my mom jealous. She gives me a small tour, only pointing upstairs to tell me she sleeps up there, before taking me to the basement. It's finished and she's set up a second entertainment area with a TV and an Xbox 360. I even spot some old guitar controllers, in the corner. There's a full bathroom and a bedroom, in the far corner with a nice bed already made up.

"I know you said it's alright, but I'm definitely paying you back for this. This is really too kind." Lena just shakes her head.

"Not happening," she replies, crossing her arms.

"You can't stop me from trying," I say, crossing my own arms and smirking. Her brow creases as she lets out a light snort. Lena takes a couple steps towards me and I feel the wall on my back. I stare into her eyes and am surprised that I don't feel the same way Caleb made me feel, when he would corner me. This time, I can feel my heart racing in places besides my chest. I see Lena's eyes dilate, as if she can tell that that's what she was doing to me, too.

She places her right hand above me and says in a low tone, "I can't stop you, YN, but I can certainly do my best to make you too flustered to keep trying." I can smell her sweet and musky perfume. Her eyes have the same amused look that they had, at the bar. She's playing with me, like I'm a toy. I've never flirted with another girl, like this. Sure, I kissed a few friends, in college, but I never really took the chance to pursue anything further. It was all just in good fun, but this? This is different. And so much more exciting.

"And just how would you do that?" I look at her chest as I trail a finger along her collar, before looking back up at her. I see her breath hitch as she takes in my response. Then, she gets more serious, an almost worried look in her eyes.

"You really want to do this? I need you to know that I didn't bring you here for anything funny and that, if you're just playing, I understand. I'm not the kind of person to just bring anyone home, especially not drunk girls. I'm... not the type for one night stands," she says, searching my eyes. Wouldn't this just be one night, though? I mean, I don't think I want it to be, but isn't that how it has to go? I just left Caleb. I can't just start in with a new partner, the same night. Then again, I haven't so much as kissed him, in over three months, and with everything he's done, I think I'm ready for someone who wants me.

I look Lena in the eyes, then down to her lips. They're thin and I can tell that she bites them, but they draw my attention in a supernatural way. I want to see more of her. I want her. Looking back up and meeting her eyes, I can almost see sweat forming on her brow, in anticipation of my answer.

I place my hands on either side of her face and let out a steady breath. "My brain has been so fried, this evening, Lena, but if there's anything that I know for certain, it's that I don't think I'd ever forgive myself if I didn't take this chance. I want this and I want you." Her eyes light up and I don't think she really knows what else to do, besides stare at me and bring a hand to my cheek. Her mouth is trying to form words, but nothing comes out. I let out a small chuckle, before leaning in just a little, glancing down at her lips, again. This time, she takes the initiative and kisses me, hungrily. My hands find each other, interlocking my fingers behind her neck. Her right hand, remains on the wall, while her left takes hold of my waist, pulling my body to hers.

"Fuck, your lips taste good," Lena growls. She tastes like peppermint and vanilla chapstick. I can feel my body turning on for the first time in ages, as she kisses me. She rolls her hips against mine and I begin to notice a firm object being ground against me. In my head, I let out a long "fuck." Lena hard packs. She's a butch who hard packs. I moan against her lips, grinding my hips to match hers.

"You're sure about this, YN?" Lena pants in my ear, huskily.

"All bark and no bite, huh?" I goad, trying to control my breathing as I plant a soft kiss on this woman's neck. She lets out a noise somewhere between a low growl and a chuckle, before latching into the side of my neck. Her teeth press against my skin and I can't hold back from moaning, which only seems to encourage her. She hungrily licks and sucks at my neck and I have to push her away, before she leaves a mark.

"Not there, just yet," I whine. "I want it there, but no visible ones, yet." She nods, a hungry look in her eye, as she realizes that this means she will have access to the rest of my body to leave marks on. She licks her lips as she looks me over.

"Fair enough." With a quick movement of her hands, I'm lifted off of my feet. I wrap my legs around her middle as her strong hands caress my thighs. "Then let's take this to my room, huh?" She gives a toothy smirk as she begins to effortlessly carry me up the two flights of stairs.

"God, you're strong," I tell her, making her smile.

"I have a very active lifestyle. When I'm not at the bar, I'm either in the gym or on the trails. And I work at the trail head, for the nature center. They have me split firewood, for the campers at the state park." I get a mental image of Lena all sweaty, wearing a wife pleaser and jeans, with an ax over her shoulder. She hums out a teasing tone, when she feels my muscles clench at the thought. One hand slides further up my ass and gives me a little squeeze, as we get to the second set of stairs. "I felt that, cutie."

I mutter into her neck, "Well, I could feel your strap, when you were grinding on me, so I guess we're even."

"You can do a lot more than feel it through my pants, if you want," she growls in my ear. When we get to the top of the stairs, I feel a wet nose touch my ankle. Toasty is looking at us, happy for company. Lena sets me down and gives his head a pat. "Sorry, buddy. You're going to have to sleep in the living room, tonight." He cocks his head, but trots down the stairs, when Lena tells him to go on.

Lena's room is spacious with a couple of dressers, thier tops covered in little knick knacks, a large book case with books ranging from older hardcovers to more contemporary, and a comfy looking king-sized bed with a maroon comforter on it and a large walnut chest at the foot of it. I excuse myself to her bathroom, for a second. I set my phone on the counter to charge and pull my toothbrush from my pocket. I give myself a quick cleaning and check my neck for a mark. Besides being a little red, I'm ok.

When I come out, Lena is sitting on the bed, looking deep in thought. She gives me a soft smile, when she notices I'm looking at her. I ask her what's wrong and she just gives a little shake of her head.

"I'm trying to figure out the right words, right now..." answers Lena. I give her a confused look and she sighs. "Well, there's... some stuff you need to know, if you're serious about this whole thing. And it's... It's going to be really hard to believe and make me sound insane." She looks almost terrified. I sit next to her and she keeps just looking at the carpet. "I hardly know you, YN... But I really feel a connection that I can't shake."

"I was feeling something similar..." I say. "Back at the bar? I just couldn't stop looking at you. Something in the back of my brain kind of just said 'that is the prettiest, most fascinating person you've ever seen, so you better not stop staring.'" She finally looks at me with a soft smile that doesn't quite reach her eyes..

"I'm... not quite a normal person." I raise an eyebrow at this as she searches for more words. "Well, you how I'm a dog person? Like, how I have Toasty?" I nod. "Well, I'm also a dog-person. With the hyphen, in the middle."

"So... You're a furry? Or is this like a pet-play thing?" I ask, thinking she's just worried about exposing a fetish.

Lena says, voice wavering in a way I would have predicted, "I'm... not entirely... human? I'm... I'm a werewolf." A goddamn werewolf? I turn and just stare at the floor, the same way she had been.

I sigh. "If you didn't really want to have sex with me, you could have just said." She looks shocked.

"I'm being serious!" exclaims Lena. "Want me to show you?" I look back at her and tell her very matter of factly that, yes, if she ever expects me to believe her that she's a werewolf, then I'm going to need proof. Holding eye contact with me, she offered her hands. I watch as they shift from the slightly muscular hands of the butch bartender to a set of furry claws. I jump back, almost falling off the bed. I don't even know what to say.

Lena stares at her hands and replies, "It's a genetic thing, so don't be worried about catching it. This town was made for our kind, a few decades ago. That's why people ask strangers if they're going to the park. It's a total safe zone for us to shift or be in our less-than-human forms. ...I'm sorry, I should have told you, sooner." She can't even look at me. She looks so ashamed. I'm trying to process it all, but nothing is computing, properly.

Slowly, I manage to ask, "Can... Can you always control it, like that, or... you know... Like, does the full moon make you wolf out?"

"I'm in total control, but the pack does get together, during the full moon, for a meeting and other activities. Mostly a midnight run or hunt," Lena explains. I look back down at her hands. They're still the paw-like, furry hands. "February can be a bit hectic, though." She laughs a little at this, but whatever it is goes over my head. Taking everything in, today, must have taken its toll, as this all starts to feel less and less insane. I place my hand on her shoulder and she stiffens.

"I've had... a very rough day, Lena. And I don't know if it's the drinks, the fact I've been so emotionally drained, or the fact that I thought you were a person I was genuinely 100% glad I met, a few minutes ago, but I don't think I care about... any of that," I say, tiredly, gesturing at her claws. She looks up at me, eyes wet with tears she's holding back, like water in a dam.

"You... you really don't mind that I'm..." Her lip quivers and I almost can't help but think it's cute. I give her a soft smile.

"Strangely enough, no." I sigh and replace my hand with my head, resting it on her muscular shoulder. "I just wish you'd saved it for a bit." I can feel her turn her head, a bit. "Not meaning that this was one, but telling a girl you're a werewolf is kind of a second date type thing." Lena bursts out with her hardy laugh, again, wheezing and letting her tears fall. I scoot closer to her and wrap an arm around her waist.

"So... I'll take it you want to keep seeing me?" Lena asks, sniffling and wiping away tears from her eyes and face with her paws.

"Yeah... I want to get to know Lena. But you need to do a couple things, first." She nods, smiling that beautiful smile. "1.) I could use some pajamas, 2.) I want to see your whole body do that, cuz that is so weird and I don't think I'll be able to sleep without seeing how that works, and 3.) you're big spoon." She laughs and leans into me.

She jokes, "Alright, but if you ask me to play fetch, you're sleeping downstairs." I pick my head up and look into her pretty, green eyes. I give her a quick kiss on the cheek and tell her it's a deal. Then, she kisses my forehead and gets up to find me some night time clothes. She hands me a white tank top and a pair of thin, black, cotton pants. As I'm about to excuse myself back to the bathroom, she turns away and pulls her shirt off. She does the same for her sports bar. I can see just how cut she is, now. My eyes linger on her toned back as I set the clothes on her bed. I, similarly, turn away from her, disrobing and watch her out of the corner of my eye, the same way you suspect she is.

As I pull her tank top over my head, I hear the zipper of her jeans come down. I watch with anticipation as Lena slides them over her hips, exposing her red boxers and the straps of the mount she's wearing underneath it. She tosses the jeans onto a chair that seems to house a few articles of "I'll wear those again" clothes as I finish pulling on the pair of pants. She digs in her dresser and pulls out a gray t-shirt and blue, flannel shorts. She casually brings them over to her bed and sets them down, all the while she's smirking, I know she saw my ogling her chest.

"You can look, YN. Wolves are pretty open about their bodies. Can't quite shift well in your clothes and expect them to be in decent shape, after." My eyes are scanning her body and I can practically feel my brain kicking me for not just telling her to shut up and fuck me, after I got out of the bathroom. Her tits are great and the outline of her strap is just... Ugh... "Also... I can smell every time you've been turned on, tonight. Glad I waited for you to be looking, when I did the trash." She winks as my face flushes bright red.

Then, moment of truth, she slides her boxers off. Her mounted dildo springs up from her thigh - dark blue and purple, large, and in a very uncommon shape. Of course the werewolf lesbian has a Bad Dragon. I make a mental note to look for the model, in the morning. Unfortunately, I don't get to enjoy it, before she slides the toy from her hips and puts it in the chest with what looks like more of her gear. Now I can see her well groomed bush. And she's about to get more hairy.

Lena looks at me, nervously, as she steps back to the center of her room, stark naked and asks, "You're ready for this?" I nod, sitting sideways on her bed. I take a deep breath as I watch her. She groans as her body shifts and elongates, growing hairier and more monstrous. I feel my body start to shake with fear, but I don't look away. Her kind eyes change to add tones of rich amber to the forest green. Her chestnut hair covers her body, changing to gray in many places. She's so much taller than me, now. And she has a tail! She looks straight out of a movie. Twilight, eat your heart out.

As I try to speak, Lena rasps out, "There's more." Then, she begins to shrink onto all fours, hands becoming paws, broad chest slimming, and cut muscles becoming less and less defined as a wolf, unrecognizable from any other, now stands in Lena's bedroom. She pads over to me and looks up with the saddest puppy eyes I ever saw, laying her head in my lap. She can definitely feel me still shaking, because she lets out a sad whine. I don't suppose she can talk, like this.

Carefully, I set my hand on her head and her tail starts to wag, ever so slightly. I pet her coarse, yet still fluffy, fur. She's like the husky my friend had, when we were kids. She lets out another whine, looking at me expectantly, but I just stare back. I think to scratch behind her ears and she seems to enjoy it, but shakes her head and takes a step back. I watch as she shifts back, groaning and growing more and more nude, until she's just plain, naked Lena.

"I forget that you can't understand me, like that." Lena walks back around the bed and hikes her boxers back up. She comes back around, pulling her shirt on and squats in front of me. "Are you alright? I know that seeing that is a lot, the first time." I put my hand back on her head and just play with her hair. She sighs and stands up, crawling onto the bed and pacing herself at the center. Her arms are open and she motions for me to come closer. I do, sitting between her legs as she wraps me in a warm hug. She sways and hums one of the songs that had been playing at the bar. I hardly even register it, when I start to cry. It feels like my body is just all of a sudden racked with sobs as I cry against her.

"It's alright, YN. It's going to be alright. I've got you." Three little words to make you feel at home. Two strong arms to hold you together. Lena feels like the one person in the whole world with both, and she is, right now. "I don't know what all you're going through, right now, or how much I've just added to all of the things on your mind, but I'm right here, for you, YN. I'm right here." She continues swaying and rocking me until I can't cry anymore. She wipes my teary face either thumbs and holds my cheeks in her hands, until I look at her.

"That's it. It's going to be ok. Want me to grab you some tissues? There's a box right over there." She jerks her head over to her right. I nod and she leans back, stretching out. She comes back with a small box of Kleenex and I take one, blowing my nose, loudly. She rubs my back and just sits, patiently waiting. After a few more tissues and a few more lingering hiccups of sobs, I'm left puffy-eyed and all cried out, leaning into Lena's warm hug.

"I think it's time to get some rest. We'll figure this out, in the morning, alright?" Lena softly asks. I nod against her chest. She scoots back, leading me with her hand, as I crawl behind her. "Ok. Let's just scoot back, here, and get comfortable and we can fall asleep, when you're ready. Come here." She pulls back the comforter and tosses the decorative pillows off the end of the bed. Lena, then, pulls the covers over both of our laps, as I lean into her, finding comfort in her warmth.

"Lena?" I whimper, trying to find my voice.

"Yeah?"

"This is all real, right now?"

"I'm afraid it is." I nod. "Is there anything I can do for you, YN? Anything at all that would help you though this?" She sounds so sincere, almost pleading.

"Just... Don't... Don't let me go. Okay? Promise me that."

Lena's face softens and she kisses me on the top of my head. "YN, when I said that thing about not doing one night stands, I meant it. There's nothing set in stone, but I trust my instincts and they're completely drawn to you. Wolves mate for life."

"I know this sounds weird, but haven't you had partners, before? You seem so confident and practiced." She laughs through her nose.

"I've had a few standing partners, but those relationships were for mutual physical needs. I'm twenty-seven and it's a bitch to be as horny as wolves can get, without having an outlet. Mostly women, but one was nonbinary," Lena explains, gently, rubbing my arm with her thumb.

"Men, but mostly because I was unsure. Looking at you... I don't know, it was just different." She nods along.

"It can feel like that, sometimes. And it's ok to feel unsure." Lena rests her chin in my head. "Also, and I hate to do this, but I'm going to run downstairs and let Toasty out, for just a second. I'll be right back, ok?"

I nod and reply, "Yeah, go ahead." She kisses the top of my head, before slipping out of the bed, putting on her shorts, and telling me she'll be right back, before disappearing out the door. I head to the bathroom, myself, while she's gone. Checking my phone once more, finding nothing but random notifications, before grabbing it and plugging it in next to the bed, for the night. I swipe away all of the notifications for calls and texts from Caleb, the fear of that whole situation feeling like a distant memory. I take a chance to look at his messages, all the same as they've been during previous fights. I know I have to go back to my apartment, tomorrow, to assess the damage.

When I hear Lena coming back up the stairs I shut my phone off and set it back down. She flicks the light off and climbs back into her bed to snuggle up to me.

"Can I ask one more big favor?" I ask.

"Anything."

"Can I come back, tomorrow? Stay a while?"

"Nothing would make me happier. Stay as long as you'd like. Preferably forever, but..." she jokes. I laugh and that makes her smile. "Aww, there's that cute laugh. ...Alright, now. It's been a long day and it's getting really late. We'll get you all settled, tomorrow. I already told Vix, that I'm not going to be in, tomorrow, anyways." Lena holds me close as she prepares to fall asleep. With the weight of everything, both being away from Caleb and from everything since I entered Lena's house, I fall asleep almost immediately. I barely make out Lena's, "Goodnight, YN," as I fade into the darkness of sleep, dreamless and safe.

#sfw smut #lesbian smut #monster fucker #monsterfucker #butch lesbian #wlw monster #monster wlw #werewolf gf #werewolf fic #werewolf girlfriend #monster x human #monster x reader

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musings-of-a-rose · 3 days

Text

Falling Slowly - Chapter 10

Pairing: Tommy Miller x f!reader

Word Count: 3900+

Rating: Mature - 18+ ONLY!

Warnings: Just like ao3, “creator chooses not to use warnings.” If you click Keep Reading, that means you agree that you’re the age to handle mature themes. Also by clicking Keep Reading, you understand warnings may not be complete in order to avoid spoilers for the story.

Notes: I'm sorry this took so long to post! Originally this was supposed to be it, but this chapter took a lot more to write than I anticipated, so you'll have one more chapter after this one!

**If you want to be added to the taglist, join here or let me know!

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**Divider made by @benkeibear

**Reader is not described

Main Masterlist

Falling Slowly Masterlist

Tommy Miller Masterlist

Tommy was right about Joel. Not only did he refuse to come, he got into an argument with Tommy, calling him all sorts of names before storming out. Rose and Sarah both think he's just scared of losing Tommy, and they're probably right. My pants would be engulfed in flames if I said I wasn't scared shitless.

But the alternative is staying here and, as much as I love this cabin and our family, we can't stay here with this raider situation. I cannot lose my husband.

Tommy ends up having to do one more raider mission, but he knows that I'm packing up our things, quietly. Jax is mostly upset about leaving Sarah, but he understands why we have to leave. He may only be 13, but he's fairly observant. He's seen the weight on his father's shoulders and knows that it can't stay that way.

I get everything gathered up, provisions, any personal items that we'd need, like our packs. I fill up canteens and water canisters they had lifted from an old Walmart a couple years back. When Tommy and Joel return, Tommy actually has a little pep in his step. He pulls me in for a hug, whispering in my ear.

"I have a Firefly meetup location."

That had been the reason Tommy had gone out once more, to scout more information about the Fireflies. I don't know how he did it, but he did, the scowl on Joel's face all the confirmation I need to know it's legit.

We all take full showers, not knowing when we'll have this luxury again, Tommy and I lingering a little longer than was necessary in ours. After a full night's rest, or as much rest as we can get, when the sun has barely risen, we're putting the last of our things in the back of the SUV. Rose and Sarah had come down and made breakfast while we finished packing and loading. Joel had come down but said nothing, eating silently as we all joked and ate, trying to push away the real idea that we may never see each other again.

Rose and Sarah walk Jax and I to the SUV out front, idle chatter trying to cover up how scared we were. Tommy and Joel are still inside and we figured we would give them their space.

"If he changes his mind, just find the Fireflies. They'll know where we are," I reassure Rose as she leans over to hug me. "Even if we end up leaving them, we'll leave word with where we go."

Rose nods against me. "Did you get the extra med kit I stashed in your bag?"

I chuckle. "Yeah. Thanks, mom."

She pulls back and cups my face. "Please be careful."

"You too."

She hugs me briefly again before stepping back. "Who knows, maybe Joel will change his mind."

Sarah blows a raspberry with her tongue. "Yeah, that'll happen."

I pull Sarah to me, still in shock that she's somehow 24 and not 12. A whole entire ass adult. She hugs me tight, like if she squeezes just a bit harder that I won't go.

"You watch out for your dad, Sarah. Don't let him get in his head. You know how he is."

She nods and pulls back, wiping tears from her face. "Pulling his head out of his ass should be fun."

Fuck I'm gonna miss this kid.

The front door opens and Tommy and Joel walk out, Tommy chatting away to a stoic faced Joel.

"...can change your mind, you know. We can pack everything up and be gone in a couple hours?" Tommy ends with a hopeful note, but his face quickly falls as Joel shakes his head.

"I already think you're fucking stupid for leaving this place."

"Fair enough. Well, you know how to find us." Tommy tosses his pack in the backseat and turns to give Joel a hug, their embrace lasting a little longer than it normally would have. Tommy moves on to Rose and Sarah, Joel stepping back to give them their space.

I walk up to him and squeeze his hand, his brown eyes, so like his brothers but so very different, finding mine. "Please think about it, Joel. Even without the Raiders, you know it's only a matter of time before the kids would want to leave and make their own lives."

He nods. "I can't promise we'll leave, but I promise to think on it."

"I'll take it."

Joel pulls me in for a hug, which always still surprises me a little, as I'd thought for the longest time that he hated me, only to find out he was pissed at Tommy for not asking me out for forever.

"Uncle Joel?" Jax cuts into our embrace and Joel whispers something in his ear, which must have been some joke between them because Jax starts laughing and Joel even cracked a small smile.

"We gotta get going, Daisy." Tommy touches my arm and I look at him, nodding before looking back at everyone, exchanging our last goodbyes and I love you's.

Driving away from our little corner of this new world into an uncertain one was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.

"Welcome to the Fireflies," A woman named Marlene, who appears to be the big leader, welcomes us into their makeshift camp.

"Thanks for having us," Tommy shakes her hand and she nods.

"Anyone willing and able to join the fight. And from what I hear, you're an excellent shot. Military background?"

"Desert Storm."

Marlene nods. "We could definitely use that. Everyone pulls their weight around here. What can you two offer?" Marlene looks pointedly at me and Jax and it's then I realize that she wouldn't give two flying fucks about us if it it were between the mission and us. Something to keep an eye on.

"I'm really skilled with gardening."

"I swear this woman could grow an apple tree from a broken stick," Tommy chuckles.

"That's great but we don't really have much need for a gardener."

"Oh. Well I'm pretty good with medicine. My...sister in law was a doctor. I helped her a lot."

"Medicine? That we can definitely use. What about you?" She turns to Jax, who's eyes widen at being addressed directly, which make sense since he's only talked to us since he was 3.

"I uh, I'm good with ani-"

"He was learning medicine. Alongside me. He makes a good assistant."

Marlene looks between me and Jax for a moment before nodding. "Alright. Both of you report to the med room in the morning. You all have the rest of the night to settle in. Your room is at the end of the hall, the door with the Barbie sticker on it. I'll see you in the morning, Tommy." Marlene walks off, another Firefly immediately approaching her and speaking in a low voice.

"Well. Let's go see where our for now home is."

Tommy picks up his pack and a bag, all of us copying his movements, and heads down the dingy hallway. I'm sure this building was gorgeous, back in it's day. But the years since the outbreak haven't been kind, water had leaked through the roof, the wallpaper peeling back in places, piles of rubbish strewn about or pushed aside to make a path. We reach the door with the Barbie sticker and Tommy pushes inside, the room not much cleaner than the hallway. There were two beds in this once hotel room, but I'm not certain I want to sleep on them.

"I miss home," Jax says under his breath.

"Yeah, bud. Me too. But this is an adventure! And temporary. We can deal with this."

I appreciate his optimism, but I am also doubtful about the conditions of our living situation changing while with the roaming Firelfies.

Life with the Fireflies was constantly busy. It seemed like they were trying to fight multiple battles, people often going on missions away for weeks at a time, our camp always on the move and not just in one area but across the country. Tommy was often away, either helping Marlene strategize or actually putting his own boots on the ground. I hated when he had to do that. He'd get this look in his eyes, much like when he has PTSD dreams about his time in the Army.

After a time, Jax asked me why I had lied to Marlene about him helping with medical things as opposed to his gift with animals. I told him I wanted him close, which was the truth. It wasn't that I thought he wasn't capable, but I wanted him near me in case something happened. I didn't trust them. Not entirely.

About 2 years in, we were stationed outside of the Denver QZ, which was still controlled by FEDRA. It took them a few months of scouting and gathering intel before Marlene finally approached Tommy and another member, Eugene, about infiltrating the QZ, attacking them from the inside.

"I'm sorry, she wants you to be, what, a terrorist cell or something?" I couldn't believe what Tommy was telling me. I knew he had to be doing some things he didn't like, his PTSD was really bad these days, but this?

He nods. "Yeah, something like that. Except we aren't terrorists, Daisy."

I count on my fingers. "Infiltrating a city, gathering more intel, setting off bombs or some shit, and probably fucking.. I don't know, torturing people or whatever terrorists do? That's not terrorism?"

He shakes his head. "It's not like that, Daisy. FEDRA is a military dictatorship. Those civilians in there are struggling and dying under their bullshit terms."

I scoff. "So you're going to free them from their oppressors by bombing them?"

He pauses. "I don't make the call."

"No. You just follow orders." The anger and hurt in Tommy's eyes cut into me and I sigh. "I'm sorry, Tommy. I am. I'm just...I'm scared."

The anger softens and he takes my hand. "I know. I am too. But those people need our help."

6 months. Tommy had been gone in his "not terrorist cell" for 6 months. Marlene just avoided me now, not even bothering to see me when I demanded an update. She kept telling me she'd tell me when she knew something, but how do I trust her? She sends her people in like pawns, their deaths for the cause are justified in her eyes.

I remember the day he left. A soft kiss to my lips in my early morning daze, the press of his hips against mine, my moans catching in my throat as we have to be nearly silent.

I adjust his jacket by the front door, smoothing it down before running my fingers over his hair, which he'd let get a little longer these days, the curls sometimes tumbling over his forehead.

"I promise I'll come back, sweetheart."

"You better. Or I'm coming in the afterlife and dragging your ass back out."

He laughs, a sound I had become unfamiliar with, and it brings tears to my eyes. He cups my cheek, his thumb brushing away the tears. "I don't doubt that for a second."

"Please be safe. And don't be stupid."

He pulls me to him, my face nuzzling into his chest as I inhale his scent, trying desperately to etch it into my memory.

"I love you, Daisy. Keep Jax close."

"I will. I love you."

One last kiss, a swipe of his tongue in my mouth and he's gone, a small smile and freckles the last image of him before the door closed. He'd told me a few weeks, maybe a month tops. Or 2.

But it had been 6. Half a year.

Jax turned 16 shortly after Tommy had left and I could hear them trying to recruit him to be boots on the ground. Not that age really matters to them. I've seen them parade kids through here, no more than 11, putting a weapon in their hands and telling them they have a chance to fight for freedom. But Jax will have none of it. He took my warning when we first joined and poured himself into his role as a medical assistant, helping the other healers but always staying near me. I knew his heart wasn't in it, not like it was with animals. But that calming nature the animals loved allowed him to calm anyone who came in, whether they were dying or not.

It was late. I sent Jax to our room, letting him crash a bit earlier than normal because he just looked so weary. I start to tidy things up a bit, never really having the time to during the day. When I put the last tray up, I hear shuffling and mumbled voices in the hall. I listen, not to eavesdrop but to hear if they were coming my way. They were, and in a bit of a hurry. The door is kicked open and 2 men enter, carrying a 3rd man in between them.

Tommy.

Relief and terror washed over me as I take him in, the 2 men laying him on the makeshift examination table. I swallow down everything to focus on the healing part. There would be time for more later.

"Daisy, can you handle this?" Marlene asks from somewhere in the dingy room.

I nod, a tray already in my hand. I bark orders at one of the men and he scurries about, trying to gather up the things I need. Tommy lays on the table, nearly unconscious, the other man, Eugene, has his hand pressed tight against Tommy's side.

"What h-happened?" I manage to choke out.

Eugene looks at Marlene for permission and I see red.

"If my husband dies on this table because it's some classified-"

"Shrapnel. We didn't see the grenade. Tommy saw it last minute and pushed me out of the way. He cleared the blast but it sent shit flying."

Fuck. Fuck fuck FUCK. Not the time to panic.

"Marlene, go wake Tenari. I'll need another pair of hands."

"What about Jax?"

"He doesn't need to see this."

She nods and heads out the door, setting a brisk pace.

I pour some alcohol over my hands and wipe them together, disinfecting them as best as I can. "Ok, Eugene. I need you to move your hands so I can see."

"Yes ma'am. I just didn't want it to jiggle."

I swallow hard and can't help the gasp that leaves my lips when Eugene's hands are clear of Tommy's body. A sharp piece of metal sticks out from the side of his abdomen at a strange angle, his shirt ripped and soaked in blood. The other man comes back with the supplies just as Tenari comes in. She glances at Tommy and immediately moves to our makeshift medicine cabinet.

Fuck. I wish Rose was here. This is very out of my league. But she did tell me a bit about foreign objects in the body. It's not just the shrapnel I'm worried about. It's how dirty the metal was.

"His blood is red so it missed his liver," I note as Tenari sets down some herbs and medicines next to the bandages and rags that the other man had brought.

"That's something at least. You want me to stitch? You know I have a steady hand."

I nod. "Yeah. That might be best. I'll get by his head."

Eugene stands next to me, grabbing Tommy's arm. The other man moves by his feet. Marlene comes back in with someone else, each of them taking another leg and arm. I lean over his face, his eyes still closed, placing my hands on his cheeks.

"He's going to wake up when I pour this on him and take it out. You gotta hold him still. Everyone ready?" A quick glance and everyone nods.

Tenari wastes no time. In one quick move, she picks up the alcohol bottle and dumps it on the wound. Tommy immediately wakes, shrieking and yelling, his body pushing against everyone holding him down as the alcohol burns him.

"Hey baby. Ssshhh it's me. It's Daisy."

His eyes flash up to mine, tears leaking from them. "Make it stop, Daisy," His voice is small and raspy, choking back pain.

"I know, baby. I know. But the alcohol is doing its job. But, hey look at me," Tommy's eyes had started to wander, noticing Tenari grabbing something from the little side table.

"Tell me."

"You took shrapnel. It doesn't appear to have hit your liver, which is good. But we have to take it out and stitch you up. You gotta stay still, which we will help you with."

"This is gonna fuckin' suck, isn't it?"

I smile a little down at him, brushing some curls from his forehead. "Yeah, baby. It's going to really suck. But I'll be right here, ok? Feel my hands on you? I'm right here."

He's scared, but he'd never admit it. A moment's pause before he nods. "Just do it."

Tenari looks around at us and we nod, everyone bracing. My eyes don't leave his, not when she pulls out the shrapnel, not when the scream erupts from my husband's throat, not when he involuntarily pushes against everyone, his body trying to escape the pain. I call his name and he looks at me, pain in his eyes and I smile gently at him. I start to sing, one of his favorites and he focuses his attention on me, grunting out when Tenari starts to sew his skin back together. By the time she's done, he's stopped fighting it, his eyes solely fixed on me. Tenari places a hand on my arm, letting me know she's finished. Everyone lets him go and I end the song, Tommy still looking at me, a faraway look on his face as his eyes start to close from the stress of it all.

"You got it from here?" Tenari asks.

I nod. "I got it. Thank you."

She squeezes my arm before gathering up all the things that need to be washed, Eugene and the other man helping her. As they leave, I hear Marlene tell Eugene he needs to find his wife. Something about her not being happy.

I sit on the stool next to Tommy's makeshift bed, a clean rag and a bowl with soapy water in my hand. I start to clean him, making sure all of the blood is wiped away so we can keep a good eye on his stitches. I make a poultice from our medical stash, placing it over his stitches so it can hopefully keep away any infection. We managed to get some antibiotics in him, but who knows if those still work after all this time?

When I'm all cleaned up, I sit back down in the chair next to his bed, taking his hand in mine. I lace my fingers with his, using my other hand to push his hand back from his face.

And then I lose it.

Tears pour from my eyes like I've never cried before. My body shakes, my stomach in knots. My heart feels simultaneously like it's being ripped from my chest but also relieved that he's finally back with us. I calm down enough to kiss his cheek, speaking directly into his ear.

"You are not allowed to die on me, Tommy Miller.....please don't die on me."

Tommy sleeps for nearly 3 days straight, only waking once to take a sip of water before slipping back into sleep. Tenari says that's a good thing, that his body is trying to heal.

He was a little warm that first day, but by the second he was cooling down. By the end of the third day, any trace of a fever was gone. The strong smelling poultice was doing its work.

"Daisy?"

He croaks out my name and my head snaps up from where I had been dosing off next to him.

"Tommy! Hey baby, how do you feel?" I feel him squeeze my hand. Even though it's weaker than normal, I still think that's a good sign.

"Like I had a piece of metal ripped from my stomach."

I chuckle, unable to stop the tears that started flowing the second I heard his voice. He reaches up and wipes away a tear from my cheek.

"Hey none of that. You really think a dinky piece of metal is gonna take me away from my family?"

I sob, nodding. "Either that or infection."

"Come here."

He pulls me to him as best he can, holding me while I sob into his chest, speaking gentle phrases into my ear to calm me.

"I'm not going anywhere, Daisy. Well, I'm not dying anyway."

I sit upright, looking him straight in the eyes. "Don't tell me you're going on another mission?"

He shakes his head. "No, baby. I think...I think we need to leave."

Relief surges through me. "Are you serious?"

He nods. "When I was in the QZ, I managed to get a job working the radio. Lied. Told them I'd had experience. Anyway, I was listening in one night and I heard some people, not in the QZ, talking about some settlement up north. Somewhere in Wyoming."

"Wyoming is fairly large, Tommy."

"Yeah, I know. Supposedly it's somewhere in Teton County."

"Another QZ?"

"No, nothing like that." He grunts, but declines my offer of more pain meds. "It's like a proper settlement or somethin'. They didn't hear much after a few radio sessions, but they did say they were working on the radio."

"So it could be overrun? Or non existent?"

Tommy shrugs. "I think it's worth a shot."

"And...and what if it's not real? Or overrun?"

He takes a deep breath and winces. "Then we find some remote cabin up there and figure it out."

Being with the Fireflies isn't really safe. We've had more close encounters with clickers being with the Fireflies than we ever have. The QZ's didn't look like great places to live either. I guess we have as decent a chance as any trying to find this place. We still have our truck so at least it won't be entirely on foot.

"Get Jax. We should ask him," Tommy gestures towards the door to the stairs that leads to our little room.

"He's only 17."

"Yeah. A man."

"17, Tommy."

"This world is different. He's smart. Just...let's hear his opinion."

Jax immediately agrees to leave, tired of this hectic life, tired of the Fireflies trying to take the medicine from his hands and replace it with a weapon.

And so, a month or so later at the start of fall, once Tommy has mostly healed, we pack up and leave the Fireflies, telling Marlene where we were heading just in case Joel or Rose or Sarah reach out. I can tell Marlene isn't happy about Tommy leaving, but she did say we were always free to go.

This time, I don't look back.

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