#AND ALSO I HATE MY WRITING MOST OF THE TIME AND I CANT WRITE ROMANCE SO WHAT THE HELL DO I DO

[quodekash]

I was just now thinking my thoughts in my brain, not bothering anyone, when ALL OF A SUDDEN I thought of tinngun masquerade ball au and now I’m obsessed and it’s been literally two minutes

NO BUT SERIOUSLY

WHAT IF THEYRE ALREADY ENEMIES AT THIS POINT

BUT THEN AT THE BALL THEY DONT RECOGNISE EACH OTHER, AND THEY DANCE WITH EACH OTHER, AND THEYRE BOTH LIKE 'DAMN'

AND MAYBE THEY EVEN TALK TO EACH OTHER AND THERE'S LIKE A FALLING-IN-LOVE-IN-THE-FIRST-INTERACTION KINDA SCENARIO GOING ON

AND THEY BOTH THINK THE OTHER VOICE IS VAGUELY RECOGNISABLE BUT THEYRE TOO CAUGHT UP IN THE MOMENT TO FIGURE IT OUT

ORRRR MAYBE ITS BEEN YEARS SINCE THEY LAST SAW EACH OTHER AND THATS WHY THEY DONT NOTICE THE VOICES

AND FROM THERE THEY COULD EITHER

A) PART WAYS AND NOT REALISE UNTIL THEYVE GONE THROUGH THE WHOLE ENEMIES TO FRIENDS TO LOVERS PLOTLINE THAT 'oh he was the one i was dancing with' when they have a nice little bonding session (probably by a pool)

or b) one of their masks comes off for some reason, and they realise, and then they feel betrayed/angry but with an underlying hint of 'maybe hes not so bad' and from there their relationship is never the same. and maybe they either dont interact for like months after that and they have a patpran-episode-1 moment, or they happen to see each other like all the time after that and there's still the biting hatred when theyre around others but its vaguely awkward, and when theyre alone they're kinda okay with each other (like them in canon for the first few episodes where they dont quite hate each other but gun is still certain tinn is trying to sabotage chinzhilla)

and if its the second option, there's SO MANY WAYS IT COULD GO

maybe they lean in to kiss each other but gun's mask bonks against tinn's and it doesnt quite work so tinn reaches to lift the mask up and then tinn notices gun's face and they jump away from each other

maybe tinn compliments gun's eyes (bc, let's face it, he has rly pretty eyes) and gun's like 'but you can barely see them' so he takes off his mask (maybe not exactly that cos that line sounds kinda weird but you get what i mean)

maybe gun compliments tinn's eyes (bc, let's face it, he has rly pretty eyes) and tinn's like 'but you can barely see them' so he takes off his mask (maybe not exactly that cos that line sounds kinda weird but you get what i mean)

maybe someone bumps into one of them while they're dancing and their mask isnt super secure so it comes off

THERE ARE SO MANY OPTIONS

NOT TO MENTION THE POTENTIAL FOR SOUNDWIN AND TIWPOR AND PATJORN

maybe tiw comes up to tinn while tinngun are being all sweet and tiw has this huge grin on his face and his hair is all messy and his mask isnt on (bc hint hint nudge nudge he was making out with someone (and hint hint nudge nudge that someone was por)) and gun recognises tiw and thereby recognises why he knows the other guy's voice, realises its tinn, and badabing badaboom conflict and the rest of the story

maybe chinzhilla are sticking together but slowly, one by one, they all taper off to other friends (or to makeout partners lmao), until it's just soundwin left and they kinda awkwardly stand there for a sec until win offers his hand to sound and very cheesily and dramatically asks 'can i have this dance?' and sound avoids eye contact at first and looks around the room and deflects the question, but win has this teasing smile on this face and moves his hand closer and does that thing with his eyebrows and stares directly at sound, and sound makes the mistake of looking back at him and then he rolls his eyes and takes his hand and they dance together but sound is exhausted cos hes had a lot going on recently with acting and stuff and the song changes to one of those super slow dancing ones, and sound can't really stay standing bc hes so tired so he closes his eyes and win lets him lean his head on his shoulder and they wrap their arms around each other and win sways slowly to the music while win is leaning on him (and so what if im crying while creating this image in my mind's eye) and maybe win is just so relaxed and comfortable that he rests his head on sounds and he closes his eyes (and he's not super close to falling asleep so they dont fall down altho that would be incredibly entertaining)

and even tho i dont rly want this i want a soundwin plotline in this hypothetical au so maybe someone else at the ball (probably a fan of sound's) sees them and (if its set in modern times) takes a photo of them or (if set in a period time) tells a bunch of other people and points them out (and the modern times person would also probably do that) but either way the message goes around and people are freaking out and it might like take a toll on their mental health and they might hide or have to cut off a lot of communication for safety bc sasaengs are the worst and they have a very puentalay-in-their-universe-in-ep12-esque plotline

and when the chinzhilla members slowly leave one by one, i think pat would initially leave to go get food or something and maybe he runs into jorn at the food table and they could have an argument or something

or maybe pat leaves to go get food and he runs into jorn at the food table but neither recognises each other at first and they have a moment similar to tinngun where they like low-key fall for each other without knowing what each others' faces look like

or maybe (extending from either of those two scenarios) they ask each other what people they came with, and pat sees jorn point to two guys standing in like the middle of the room dancing together (tinngun) and to two guys in the corner of the room either making out or very clearly close to making out (tiwpor), and then jorn asks who pat came with, and pat looks around and (being pat), can't find/recognise any of them until finally his eyes land on soundwin and he realises 'oh im all alone shoot dang it' and is rly close to a mental breakdown, but then jorn (who is also Bored And Alone) offers to dance with pat and at first hes caught off-guard but then he agrees and they dance and frbhghr

or maybe pat leaves to go get food and then he comes back to find everyone gone except for soundwin who are staring at each other lovingly and dancing, so he feels really lonely and runs to the bathroom and he runs into jorn (either on his way there, in the bathroom, or on his way out), and jorn comforts him or whatever

or maybe pat leaves to go to the bathroom and then he comes back to find everyone gone except for soundwin who are staring at each other lovingly and dancing, so he feels really lonely and runs to the bathroom so he goes to the food table to eat his feelings away (which feels like something he'd do), and jorn comforts him or whatever

and maybe the comforting in those last two scenarios is them dancing together and grbghrbh

and i can think of a million ways this would branch out into an actual plot but i have too many ideas to keep it as a fixed storyline and this is already so long im probably boring everyone, im so sorry but also im not because HOLY HELL MSP MASQUERADE BALL AU

[fics-lovebot]

seventeen recs

main masterlist

pls remember to reblog if you like any of my recs❤️

poly

dating svt (hyung line) - LOVE IT, joshua got me on a chokehold, and wonwoo PLEASEEEEEEEEEEE :( wherecanIgetoneofthose

dating svt (maknae line) - mingyu as a back hugger is so :(((((((((, I can totally see dino writing love letters to his s/o :(((

pick-up lines - non-idol! au, fluff, silly af, my favs are jeonghan, jun, wonwoo, woozi, mingyu, chwe and chan

you take your promise ring off during a fight - performance unit, vocal unit , hip-hop unit, angsty af, made me cry a little

reaction to the camera panning to them when their idol!s/o is on stage - idol!au, idol!reader, dsfkjsdfjh the jeonghan is my fav idk

kitten ears - pwp, smut, hybrid!reader in heat, LEMME TELL YOU SOMETHING ABOUT THIS ONE RIGHT HERE, IT´S FILTH,,,,, and my fav one is hoshi´s LDJSLFJH read it whenever you feel like having a smut fest

hip hop unit

seungcheol

let me take care of you - drabble, fluff, hubby!cheol, pregnant reader, he is straight uP husband soon-to-be-daddy material, this was so CUTE,,,

caught in a trap - smut, seunkwan´s sister!reader, older brother´s bff!cheol, face riding, he makes you beg for it, “you’ve got me in your little trap, baby. what are you gonna do with me?” SLDKJSHDFKSJ whY is he like tHAT??

as your boyfriend - he gets offended if you don´t let him pay???? now THAT´S my kind of man

whatever you say - fluff, crack, text au, #simp, this is funny lmao

wonwoo

he angry fucks you bc he lost in a video game - blurb, smut, explicittt, the title??? I can see the vision. listen the way this just escalated INMEDIATLY I-, he is ANGRY FR FR in the hottest way, just read it ok pls

he´s rough and in love - smut, just pwp, i made up the name bc it is what it is, he´s already made you cum twice but he still looks at you with eyes full of the purest love while doing the nastiest things, puthy clenching dirty talking, you talk too much, y’know that?, he wanted to keeP GOINg like,,,,sir

the peephole - smut, perv!wonu, roomies au, he´s obsessed, "Speak up, slut. Or have I fucked you completely stupid already" UMMMM?????

scented candles - e.r, fluff, idk idk idk this was cute

couple things - slice of life, fluff, “is there… a reason you’re upside down, my love?” 

needle in the hay - idol au, angst, smut, break up au, idol!reader, 97-liner! reader, poor wonu, slow burn kinda, he´s hopeless and scared and nervous

lingering looks - fluff, idol romance u, POWER COUPLEEEEEEE, I love it, this could be us but he playin

marriage -married life au, dad!wonu, his daughter (a child) wants to marry uncle gyu so he goes on cardiac arrest bc there´s no mf way bUT at least it wasnt soonyoung

workplace crush - work au, co-worker!wonu, I CAN TOTALLY SEE HIM AS "THE IT DEPARTAMENT CRUSH"!!!!! I would have had to quit, it´s too much

cat and mouse - smut, kinda red flag!wonu, "Wonwoo thinks you’re the cutest person ever. And the part of you he finds the most cute? The fact that you actually think he’s going to let you avoid him forever." FLSDUKFJHSLDKJFH

arguments - smut, “You remember how I dealt with that little attitude of yours last time?”  he´s a cocky mf

wisdom tooth surgery - fluff, reader is out of it bc of anesthesia and she cant believeee mingyu´s hot rommie is her mans, it´s a nice read

bruised - angst, fluffy ending, break up au, tough guy wonu but he´s actually a cutie pie, he´s careless about his safety, I LOVE ITTT, the angst is gewd

what you need - smut, shy!reader, soft dom!wonwoo, praise kink, JEON MF WONWOO I- LSFHSKDJFHLSJDFLH this made me blush yall, the ending too sdfksdfkh

mingyu

birthday boy - fluff, f2l, the fLIRTING!!??, i honestly blushed, my eyes got watery and everythin, i HATE IT (not) bc why is he so dreamy every TIME??, also,,, the make out sesh?? MY GODDD, i swear I felt it. he. is. inloveeeeee

first kiss - fluff, established relationship, he IS going to kiss you or else,,,,the man is obsessed

he´s big - smut, size kink,"daddy's too big for you? s'okay, princess, you can do it. you can take it. you're my good girl." CALL THE MF POLICE RN!!!!1!!!!! iminlove

big buff gyu - smut, manhandling, dom!gyu, “look at me, let me see you cry, baby” STOOOOOPPPP sksdfnslflfwkf

beach boobs babes - smut, beach au, chubby reader, big boobs, he´s suffering sfjfjdhdjdh, HE´S COCKY,, literally, shit talker, titty fuckin, he likes thicc girlsssss

pup code - fluff, smut, crack, size kink kinda, mingyu has a fat crushhhh, lowkey himbo vibes, he gets so nervous lmao, jeonghan is a lil shit, somebody help mingyu omg, wonwoo is a victim!!!!!, “I’ve never done the Zoolander face in my life!” jefjrejufriuj

sleepy talk - fluff, married au, “Do you think I’m pretty?” “Sweetheart, we’re married.”

his girl - smut, angst, emotionally unavailable reader, whipped mingyu, “i’ll fuck you forever.. as long as you want. fuck you ‘til you never wanna leave again”

funfetti - bf!gyu, birthday au, so FLUFFY I WANNA CRYYYYYYYYYY love him sm :(

hybe romance - idol!gyu, idol!reader, fluff, love itttttttttttt, THOSE PICS OF MINGYU ON PART 2 LORDDDD, if I was an idol hanging out with the 97 squad i´d be a hOE, no questions asked, bunch of men i want to fucc sitting together would be the end of me

pussy drunk - smut, pussy whipped, "i'm legit gonna kill myself if we dont fuck again", HE NEED SOME MIL

creep - smut, halloween au, serial killer!gyu, ghost!gyu, jeonghan is always starting some shit I swear, this is DIFFERENTTT and the smut is so good yall PLEASE read it

first morning together - fluff, UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH :((((((( ihateithere

warm on a cold night - fluff, college au, bsf to lovers, it´s cute

daddy - smut, lowkey fluff, dom!mingy, daddy kink, SIZE KINK are we even surprised atp?, innocent! reader

drunk giant - drunk!mingyu, bc why would he try to challenge cheol to a drinking game??, wonwoo is tired, and somebody get hoshi´s lips off of seokmin!

gym and thirst - smut, those pics of mingYU NAUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR WOOF WOOF SDKHWEYWRAWRRAWRAWR bc why tf would joshua do that for????? pls I love big men

mingyu´s cause of death - FLUFF, bf!gyu, this made me really want to cry myself to sleep from the beggining bc there´S NO WAAAAAAAAYYYYY :´´) so cute #simp #whipped

heater - fluff, gyu is cold,,,or is he not, “you’re literally taking all of my body heat, that’s why i’m cold,” “maybe if you didn’t insist on using my boobs as a pillow-,” “oh shut up,”

stain on the sink - fluff, e.r, slice of life, sex joke, you bleach his hair, is so domestic idkidk

cuffing season - smut, richbf!mingyu, he got a black card, good money, good job, loves spoiling you AND he´s wearing the wife beater - grey sweats combo??????? CUFF HIM UP NAAAOWWW, AND AND AND he also makes sure to fuck you without ruining your hair and nails that HE PAID FOR!!!!!! BUT since he gets a lil carried away and you chipped a nail he gives 300 dollar$$$ to get it fiixed right away LIKE????? god please when is it my turn to be happy

worshipping you - smut, sub!gyu, a short one but WHEEEWW

wet sound - smut, short one, THE DIRTY TALK!!!!!! I HATE HIMMMMMMMMMM bc wdym he makes her shut up so she can listen to her wet coochie sOUNDS????? call 911 rn

kitty - smut, THE VISUALS??!?!??! the way this played in my mind had me shook

trouble - fluff, non-idol!gyu, you´re his pretty mess, lowkey brat reader, in love gyu, baking cookies with his cute lil helper sdfljsdfljh :( its cute

vernon

vernon loves your face - he´s so in love omg, sdsdkfj it´s so cute

coffee talk - fluff, coworker!vernon, work romance au, jwhhxsjxsjd cutee

no studying for you - smut, he isn´t letting you study, “Hansol! For the love of fuck!” “Yeah that’s me, I love to fuck,” what?? dkdsfjfj

bias - fluff, slice of life, idol!au, you make the cats choose their svt bias, IT SO WHOLESOME :((((((((

vocal unit

woozi

joshua

bad joke - angst, fluff, calling you clingy

tom and jerry - smau, fluff, crack, text au, SOMEBODY COME GET JISOO LMAOO, he´s doing too much

mr. nice guy - smut, next door neighbors au, I HATE HIM skfffkjs this got me blushing and shit, he cosplays as a gentleman but he´s actually just a flirty nasty mf

seokmin

You Know What They Say About Men With Big Feet - smut, big feet, big nose, big muscles and a big dicc YUPPPPPP, seokmin has it ALL

perfect man - smut, he´s a gentleman, reader makes the mf move and I would have too

jeonghan

2am conversations - slice of life, “what if crabs think that fish can fly?” “angel, it’s two in the morning,” sdkhfksb it´s cute :(((( so domesticc

such a flirt - fluff, he keeps on flirting but has a breakdown when you flirt back lmao, cute

call me by his name - smut, softdom! wannabe harddom! hannie, hSLFDHSLKFH I CAN REALLY SEE THIS HAPPENING idk idk

the long way - model!jeonghan, staff!reader, UGGHHDSLHFLSKH i love this, he´s so confident and lowkey straight forward

tinted windows - smut, ceo!hannie, panty ripper,, literally, car sex, “sir you have a meeting in twenty minutes.” “fuck that stupid meeting, i have more important things to be doing right now.” IT´S GOOD YALL

seungkwan

dance unit

hoshi

why do you love me? - fluff, blurb, so cute

too hot - very suggestive, naaaahhhh he was done for before it even started

first time - smut, fluff, crack, they´re both dumb, reader is boldddd lmao, #couplegoals

drunk and in love - fluff, wasted!hoshi, him in his tiger patterned-shirt, asdkjasdh he´d deff be like this, he rants about how wonderfull you are to whoever got ears, so cute

junhui

jun realizes he has a size kink - blurb, smut, the words he SAIDD I-, in my opinion it was too short!1! that was some good stuff

how badly do you want this? - smut, oral, 7 mins in heaven, it´s hottt

minghao

lollipops and candy bars - smut, sub!hao, reader loves to tease, cute and innocent looking reader, hao needs help lmao, "Well, I finished off my lollipop a while ago, do you have anything else I could suck on?” SKLHDLFJHKLDJ wow

chan

[marmot567]

bitter orange — okkotsu yūta [1/3]

pairings. okkotsu yūta + f! reader/original character (main); past!orimito rika + f!reader; past!okkotsu yūta + orimito rika warnings/themes. mentions of death, jealousy, hints of obsession and possession. just a lil dark romance practice (which is barely any dark romance tbh who am i kidding) sprinkled with food motifs but i dont know what im doing im just here for the vibes :P mostly sfw with nsfw themes but nothing sexual bc im too scared to go down that dark path (also no use of y/n bc i started writing with an original name and it unfortunately stuck lawl... can be treated as either or it doesnt matter tbh i cant write anything outside of 2nd person anwyay) word count. 2.8k words nothing too crazy xd playlist. knuckle velvet, ethel cain; velvet ring, big thief; pure, cigarettes after sex; only in the dreams, the marias; be my mistake, the 1975; mary, alex g next

it’s been a long time since i have seen my beloved. the moss has grown on that abetachibana tree

PART ONE: ichigo daifuku

Gojō Satoru tells you that love is the most twisted curse of them all.

He had said it in passing after your first solo mission, right as you were entering the car back to Jujutsu Tech before talking your ear off with his lame jokes. The mission had consisted of exorcizing a curse that had persistently haunted an abandoned apartment complex in Omotesandō, assigned to you by the higher-ups in accordance with your newly promoted rank as a Grade 2 sorcerer, having decided that a Grade 1 was doable enough for someone of your caliber. The curse itself wasn’t anything special, though, only repeating gargled confessions of its love to some ‘Chiyo-chan’—whoever she was—the whole time you were dodging its attacks, which was incredibly annoying. You liked your battles in silence, quick and succinct, but curses make that difficult to achieve.

Gojō muses it could have been a past lover, this Chiyo-chan—its love for her having cursed itself. You didn’t really care. If you keep up the good work, complete your required missions and get another recommendation, you could be ranked a Semi-Grade 1 by your second year, then a Grade 1 by your third and nothing else after that because unless you were someone like Gojō Satoru, then you are capped forever at Grade 1.

“So anyway—snacks you like?” said sorcerer asks, finally done with his previous tale. Something about an old coworker. “Mochi, senbei, or taiyaki? Personally, I'm a mochi ice cream type of guy!”

You look at him.

“Why are you here again?”

“... Is your memory that small, Ume? I was proctoring you,” he tuts, mouth turned downwards. “Congrats on the promotion, by the way.”

You shrug. “Ichigo daifuku is good, I guess.”

He smiles, wryly.

“You’re joking, right?”

+

The building facing your childhood home had been home to Orimito Rika, an unsuspecting property with a decent front yard and the occasional street cat or two often shooed away by her irate grandmother. “Mean granny,” you’d often call her, the insult drowned out by your hushed giggles as you played with your dolls. Rika wouldn’t say anything about it, wouldn’t dare verbally agree with you, but she would always nod her head down, the corners of her lips turned up too high.

You didn’t particularly hate the old woman, but there was a certain kind of satisfaction to saying it behind her back after all the times you’ve caught her looking at her granddaughter in unbridled scorn, your own little form of revenge. You could never understand how her only remaining family could look at her like that, not when Rika was so beautiful and kind; like the cherry blossoms during spring, falling gently along with the wind. Sure, she could be a little cunning at times, and none of the other kids at school liked her because “something’s odd about her, can’t you just hang out with us instead?”—but that’s what makes her interesting, right?

Rika isn’t weird, she’s pretty, and you’re the bee drawn to her. She’s only older than you by a year, ten instead of nine, but she always played with you, taught you how to make flower crowns at the park, and when you walked home from school she’d always hold your hand. Her smile is blindingly bright, the sound of her voice a song you couldn’t stop listening to. Selfishly, you wish it would always be the two of you together; playing with your dolls, walking home with your hands intertwined.

But when she came back from the hospital, so did Okkotsu Yūta.

You could never see what she saw in him; he was short and just a little bit pathetic, always trailing after her like a lost puppy at first. You could push him off the swing and he'd move on with a sniffle, the kind to give up the plastic shovel even though he desperately needed it to finish his sand castle because he didn’t want to fight a girl. He smiled shyly and hid his hands behind his back, looking at you like he was looking for your approval. Of course, you never gave him the time of day, because it felt like he had stolen Rika—your Rika. It was supposed to be just you and her, but that wasn’t the case anymore. Now there was Okkotsu Yūta, who held Rika’s other hand after school, who took away her attention from you so easily.

“He’s so cute, isn’t he?” she asks often, a light blush dusting her face.

“I guess,” is your reply.

“Ne,” she calls, presenting to you a small, black box. You look at it in apprehension, wincing when she eventually opens it. “What do you think of this ring? It was my mom’s. I’m gonna give this to Yūta-kun, do you think he’ll like it?”

The ring was immensely simple, a silver-colored band with a small diamond in front, glinting under the light. Nevermind the fact that it was too big for a child’s fingers to fit in, Rika presented it to you as if it held all the answers to the world. Although her parents were dead, and she had definitely stolen it from her grandmother’s dresser, the ring spoke full of promise. When she takes it out of the box and lets you inspect it, it feels heavy.

“... You really like him, don’t you, Rika-chan?” you ask, quietly.

Rika looks at the stupid piece of jewelry, painfully smitten.

“Mhm,” she affirms. “I really like Yūta-kun. I want to be with him forever! Of course, I like you too, Ume-chan. You and Yūta-kun are my favorite people in the world!”

You close the box, handing it back to her. When Rika looks at you expectantly, you realize then that you could never bring yourself to take that happiness away from her.

+

The koinobori flies.

“It’s so pretty!” Rika exclaims, eyes wide and staring up at the sky where the huge, windsock carp moves around. It’s bathed in all sorts of colors—from red to blue to white to green—dancing along the azure expanse in commemoration of Children’s Day. The weather is just right, not too hot nor too cold, and the wind caresses your skin gently, the sun not too harsh. It makes the color of Rika’s hair shine in all the right ways, adds more sparkle in her already bright eyes. She’s wearing a yellow sundress, a nice change from her usual blue one. The cream-colored hat you let her borrow covers her face with the shade, but her smile remains bright and blinding. She looks pretty.

She gives you all of her ichigo daifuku, and shares Yūta’s snacks. She doesn’t even like chimaki.

“Are you sure, Rika-chan?” you ask, looking at the two sweets in your hands.

She beams. “You like them, don’t you?”

You keep them with you until the end of the event.

The day passes by incredibly fast, your little trio having exhausted yourselves from running around the park alongside the other children. Yūta chases Rika around the park, and you watch them squeal and laugh at each other and hold hands. You watch them take a nap under the shade, their pinkies intertwined, and you watch as the ugly color of green blinds your eyesight. You leave them be.

Sometimes, you wish you’re the colorful koinobori flying in the sky. You’d let Rika hold on to you, let her fly and hear her amused laugh as the wind tickles her skin. Sometimes, you wish Yūta slapped the ring away from her hands when she handed it to him. Wish he stomped it on the ground and at the same time stomped on her heart. Wish he didn’t take it with a huge smile and agree that he’d marry her when they get older; he’s not the one who’d wait long lines just to get her the best ichigo daifuku, not the one who’d jump at the other kids when they so much as think of insulting her, and he won’t be the one who’d choose to stay with her when she’s all gray and old cause he’s a boy, and boys would never do that.

Sometimes, you wish he never liked her at all—because he never deserved her in the first place.

Okkotsu Yūta could never love Orimito Rika like you.

+

He sits beside you at lunch.

Rika’s been bedridden for the whole week, which subsequently ruins your week. Yūta doesn’t seem to mind her absence all that much since he doesn’t see her a lot during classes anyway, but they’re supposed to be engaged. He should always be thinking of her, should be acting as miserable as you even at the unripe age of nine. He looks too okay with her absence when he shouldn’t be.

“What’s this?” you ask, pointing at the small bag of snacks he had placed on the cover of your bento.

“Hm?” he looks up. “Oh, it’s norimaki senbei.”

“... And?” you prod.

He tilts his head. “You don’t want it?”

“... I don’t want it.”

He looks at you thoughtfully.

“But you like them, don’t you?” he asks though he’s acting like he already knows, like you’ll take it regardless of what you say. It’s annoying.

You look at the seaweed-wrapped rice crackers—the stupid norimaki senbei—in mild contempt. “Why are you giving it to me?”

Yūta’s smile is small, knowing. “Because you don’t like sweets.”

You frown.

+

She’s a sweet girl.

You think of Orimoto Rika like that because it’s true—she smiles sweetly, she speaks sweetly, and she likes sweet things. She tells you that her favorite snack is ichigo daifuku, the very same confection you always begged your parents to buy for you just so you could share them with her. It pays off all the time because then she’d look as sweet as the daifuku itself, her cheeks as red as the fruit within it. She also likes hanami dango, but she doesn’t like the green part because she doesn’t really like the subtle taste of yomogi, so you eat the rest for her because she doesn’t want to waste it. She likes cold tea instead of hot, sweet instead of savory, like yuzu iced tea or bubbly ramune in comparison to the nutty taste of hōjicha. When you go to the store, she always gets the kompeitō with some random anime character on the packaging because those were the “cutest kind of kompeitō,” and Rika likes cute things.

She also likes the color pink, but when you ask her what her favorite color is she’d say it’s blue. It’s blue not because she wears that blue dress all the time, but blue because it’s the color of Okkotsu Yūta’s eyes, bright and round and always looking at her. Rika likes it that way—she likes how Okkotsu Yūta is always looking at her with his blue eyes, unwavering and full of adoration for her and her only.

You think Orimito Rika is a sweet girl, but sometimes she’s more than that. Sometimes, when the other kids get brave enough to drag you away from her, tell you to stop hanging out with her, they say it’s because Rika doesn’t like anyone else but Okkotsu Yūta.

Sometimes, when they tell you that, you wonder if Rika liked you at all, way before Okkotsu Yūta came into the picture.

But most of the time, you don’t really care. Even if Rika didn’t like you, you’d still like her. Even if she’d only have her eyes set on Okkotsu Yūta with his stupid blue eyes and his stupid norimaki senbei and stupid chimaki that he shared with her on the fifth of May, you’d still like her because she’s Rika—beautiful, kind, and wonderful Rika.

She has things she doesn’t like, too, such as other people but never Yūta-kun or Ume-chan! She likes it when people compliment her and praise her looks and give her free stuff like ramune or ichigo daifuku or Sailor Moon-themed kompeitō from the store, but sometimes she tells you that she dislikes this certain group of girls from Yūta’s class, dislikes the boy assigned as your seatmate, her homeroom teacher, the “weird” guy who works at the konbini a street over, and dislikes it even more when her grandmother looks at her and tells her she killed her own father without even saying anything at all.

You know all those things because you know Orimito Rika. You like her even if she holds intense dislike for the people outside her circle, people who tick her off just a little for you to see her smile crack at the edges and go stiff, the little twitch of her brown eyes, and most importantly, you still like her when all she wants in the world is the attention of the boy who wears her deceased mother’s ring.

You’ll always want sweet girls like her.

+

“Where’s Rika-chan?”

“Her grandma won’t let her go out today,” Yūta says, sitting next to you on the bench. “So it’s just you and me.”

He says it dejectedly, but it’s not enough for you. If he was really sad, then he’d be as sad as you are, so you start packing your belongings. “I’m leaving, then.”

He startles, standing up. “Huh? W–wait! Don’t leave just yet!”

“But Rika-chan’s not here,” you frown. “There’s no point in hanging out today.”

He falters, looking down at the ground.

“Even if she isn’t here, we can still play together…” he offers, looking up at you timidly. “We’re friends, too, aren’t we?”

The green-eyed monster stares at the silver chain wrapped around his neck, the ring acting as its pendant tucked underneath his shirt—like an unattainable treasure trapped inside a chest with the key thrown away somewhere you cannot find it. We’re not friends, the monster says with a snarl, stay away from me.

If there is one thing you know, then it’s that you have never wanted to be friends with Okkotsu Yūta, not after he took everything from you. He can butter you up by sticking to you during class and sitting next to you at lunch and even offering you some of his not-ichigo daifuku, not-yuzu iced tea, and not-colorful anime-themed kompeitō but you will and have never liked him for the green-eyed monster will always sit on your shoulder so long as he wears that ring on his person, a physical manifestation of his promise with Rika. Your Rika, even if that’s not really the case.

You will never like Okkotsu Yūta, because—because he—

“... What’re we even gonna do?” you ask, slowly.

He immediately brightens up.

“… Wanna get ice cream?” he offers. “There’s a new flavor I wanna try!”

His suggestion does not entice you at all, but when he stands there with an outstretched hand waiting for you to take it, like it’ll matter if you reject him, you find yourself at a crossroads. But you make your decision soon enough. Like it’ll matter, like the green-eyed monster isn’t there, staring.

“Okay,” you say, moving past him to start walking. He blinks incredulously at the blatant rejection before gathering himself and following after you, a prep to his step regardless of your actions.

You try to ignore the warmth of his body next to yours.

He’s too close.

+

“Yūta-kun’s birthday is in a few days,” Rika announces, lying on your spare futon. “Did you get him anything?”

You didn’t. “... Yeah.”

“Really? What is it?” she cranes her neck to face you. “What’d you get him?”

She doesn’t want your gift being better than hers, it checks out. “Um… just a toy. A garbage truck.”

“Oh, okay,” she turns back to face the ceiling. “I made him a scrapbook with photos of us. I worked really hard on it… do you think he’ll like it?”

“He’ll like anything you give him.”

She’s already given him a ring—what else could compare to that?

Rika smiles. “I guess… you’re right.”

Soon enough, she goes to sleep, breathing softly beside you as your fan fills the silence of the night. You continue staring at the ceiling, making out the little dents despite the lack of light. You squeeze the hand that holds your under the cover, before closing your eyes.

You hear her softly breathe on a steady beat alongside the fan whirring in the corner, and you close your eyes, squeezing her hand tighter underneath the covers of your too-close futon.

You’ll have to ask your parents for some money tomorrow.

+

“Rika-chan isn’t here again,” Yūta says dejectedly. “Her granny’s too strict.”

“She hates her,” you say quietly.

Yūta looks at you, confused. “What’d you say?”

“Nothing. Your birthday’s coming up soon, what are you doing that day?”

“Uwah—you remember?”

“Rika-chan told me.”

“Oh, well,” he smiles sheepishly, “we have school that day, but after that I’ll be celebrating at my house. I’m thinking of just inviting Rika-chan and you over… um, so, will you come?”

“I’ll go if Rika-chan is going.”

He blinks, before a smile blooms on his face. “Okay! I’ll see you, then.”

+

It happens when you aren't there.

It never should have happened at all.

Orimito Rika is pronounced dead at the age of eleven, her body unrecognizable under the heavy weight of a blue truck.

[djpachipikachu]

yuichi/leosagi/samurai rabbit hcs that are specific to my fic (dubbed graves au)

- leo and yuichj are both aroace and transmasc and will never kiss on the lips bc they think its nasty and gross

- yuichi doesnt curse bc his auntie didnt like that kinda language when he grew up and he thinks being crass is immature and he likes acting like hes mature , also hana being his little sister he doesnt want her to pick up bad language

- yuichi has gotten fired from most jobs bc he cant help but argue or yell back at annoying and entitled customers and the hidden city has a Lot of entitled customers

- also:

- chizu and kitsune are in neo edo while yuichi and gennosuke are in the hidden city

- yuichi and gen both hold a distaste for neo edo as both of them had to leave due to the ppl of the city being shitty to them in some way

- leo and yuichi both think romance is gross

- they are, however, in love

- or will be

- but not in a romantic way

- theyre the basement yard podcast

- yuichi’s love languages are acts of service (bigger one) and quality time

- yuichi is taller than leo (5’10 compared to leo’s 5’7)

- yuichi knows leo isnt a kappa but he calls him that anyways bc he knows leo hates it

- leo knows yuichi hates being called conejito which is why he started using it

- they both grow to like the nicknames as they get closer

- hueso calls yuichi “peluzote” bc it means dust bunny

- yuichi is a sumatran striped rabbit and arctic hare mix, meaning he’s mixed japanese-indonesian ! his mom’s side (usagi side) are all arctic hares while his dad was a striped rabbit , however his dad was raised fully japanese and so was yuichi

- yuichi has a winter and summer coat :] his summer coat more closely resembles sumatran striped rabbits

- yuichi’s first friend in neo edo was chizu, however they havent had much contact since he moved away since she is too busy with the neko ninja

- he and kitsune met in neo edo bc she stole his wallet but laughed at him bc he didnt have anything inside except for a few syrup packets and two joules

- theyre best friends now

i have so much more but im kinda lazy to write em down here shrugs wahoo !!!

[electraslight]

I care about ur Bevin headcannon I would love to hear

YES i finally get to yell abt these two, its my fav ship in the series idk why people arent more into it. Fanart is supplied as usual and i have some evidence-ey screenshots under the cut, mostly bc i want to share them w SOMEONE other than my friend blue. Enjoy my ramblings

-kevin is dating both ben and gwen, gwen and his relationship being a lot more outward and public and ben a more private relationship, they only ever kiss or hold hands when its just the two of them or (rarely) when gwen is around, partially bc of bens fame and his own hangups about liking men and partially bc when they are romantic they r extremely vulnerable with each other and thats the sort of thing they wouldnt want anyone else to see.

-(quoting from a discord dm w my friend) ben and kevin violence is something that if u saw it in a painting or a movie it would be rly profound and aweinspiring. in real life its also the same, but it feels so much like intruding when ur actually watchingbc kevin and ben have all their emotions about each other in v short bursts, theyll bottle them up 4 an extended period of time and then have som e massive cataclysmic event when it bubbles to the surface. there r literally no continual emotional moments between them like kevin and gwen who have contunious small emotions abt each other, kevin and ben will hang out 4 months at a time and then one day just start hitting each other, which is in a way a part of the romance

-in omniverse theres a scene where its shown that 12 year old kevin is in possession of a photo of ben that is suspiciously well worn, it has rips and stains and has been crumpled up and refolded a couple times. I like to think he kept that photo, whether to use as a beacon of hate or chew on and cry who knows. 

-ben and kevin dont give a shit about what form the other takes, the only time ben has ever blushed about a guy is when mutant kevin grabbed him in the rooters arc and kevin is around alien versions of ben every day and doesnt bat an eye. This is why i think that once kevin and ben get together kevin makes a game about kissing all of his aliens (indiscriminatley. Even if they dont have mouths) he makes a scoring system and writes reviews on how good the experience was in glitter gel pen and makes a ranking list of his favorites. Stinkfly sweeps the vote, shocking everybody. Ben would rank kissing kevins mutations but only 2 out of 5 would even consider it before turning him into pink mist so he just sticks with what he knows.

- ben and kevin get married when theyre older and gwen stays in girlfriend status (mostly bc she knows that ben has a much shorter lifespan than her and kevin and she wants to give him the happiest time she can while hes still there) and they all live in a mansion the size of the white house. Kai comes by once a month to keep kenny happy (he still thinks shes his bio mom even after theyve told him multiple times she was just a donor. Gwen says he gets his delusions from ben). Ben and kevin like to sit on the 500 foot long porch and throw rocks at passerby and snuggle. Kevin is so happy he giggles mindlessly to himself in public, scaring strangers. He tries to get them to look at pictures of his family but this only further creeps them out.

-kevin finds the most random shit ben does extremely charming. hed look at him picking his boogers and eating them and he thinks in his head i need this guy so much. ben finishes a rubix cube not even very fast and kevins like wow. cool. do you like emos.ben is charmed by kevin in the same way. he sees kevin use the toilet brush to scratch an itch on his back and hes like fuck oh fuck oh fuck

I have more i prommy i just cant think of them rn, i will make more if im able. 4 now please have my collection of bevin screenshots under the cut. Spread the word my disciples. fair warning there are a lot

[olderthannetfic]

(i sent an ask a few months ago- i was the one who said i was going to write a fic romanticizing rape since the commenter wanted to see it so bad they were inventing it)

I was an anti when i was younger. I was led to believe that if you liked something in fiction, it meant you subconsciously wanted to do it/have it happen to you. So i felt really guilty for reading the badwrong fics out of curiosity, but also fascinated by it bc it was 'forbidden', so i usually would go back to the fic a few days later to reread.

I cant point to one definitive thing that made me stop, it was a slow realization that I don't actually give a shit what other people do and there are better ways to spend my time than worrying about what people who have already made up their minds to dislike me think of me.

So now, in my friend group, when people get hate for a pairing or something that happens in a fic, i take the premise one step further. Friend's enemies to lovers fic is accused of being abusive? I write the same ship with the 'pimp her out and beat her for cheating' dynamic.

Ironically, most people back down. There was one of my followers who was being super possessive over a romanced character in an mmo and after i started writing fics about the character, he deleted his entire blog (considering that his whole blog was devoted to the romance and character, i can safely say I was probably a factor)

--

[artsyunderstudy]

Trope Grading Game

Heyyy! Thanks for the tag this morning @hushed-chorus you gave me a great alternative for WIP Wednesday since I got a head full of ideas and a word doc full of empty.

Also thanks to @stitchyqueer @brilla-brilla-estrellita @larkral @forabeatofadrum @ileadacharmedlife @wellbelesbian @prettygoododds @cutestkilla @cosmicalart @bazzybelle @aristocratic-otter for the tags today and yesterday. If you haven't done this yet consider yourself TAGGED!

Rules: How much do these tropes affect your decision to click on a fic?

-10 -> very dissuaded

0 - don’t care either way

+10 -> very enticed

nope -> if it’s a hard no and you’d never click on a fic with that tag or or you even have the tag blocked or you’d insta click out of the fic if it wasn’t tagged

Bonus points for explaining the rating and whether it’s conditional.

Age gap: -1

Mmm, no? Especially not for younger characters, but like, its not a thing I seek or or actively dislike in general.

Codependency: +5

LOL yes, I'm into fics that explore this. Either in a fun way or in a serious way, because its interesting no matter what. I suppose sometimes if we're talking really toxic codependancy that isnt dealt with it might turn me off in the long run but it definitely will draw my interest in the tags.

Obsession/Possessiveness, jealousy: +4

Complicated feelings. I'm kinda into it, so it definitely wont put me off, but jealousy as a trope can either be really fun in a story or really toxic. Like, I'm a little obsessed with Simon's jealousy in the series, because its not the kind where he gets mad at Baz, really, or lashes out at him, its very internal and about his own insecurity, but also really indicative of how very attached he is despite his assertions through wayward son that he was going to end things.

I love a bit of possessiveness as long as its not the kind that hurts their partner or turns really bad to the point of me disliking the character.

So, yeah, in most situations i'm a fan of exploring this, though I can't say I specifically look for it.

Opposites (grumpy/sunshine etc): +8

Yes, definitely. I love this in a romance, its really fun to explore those dynamics. Like, IRL I think really good relationships have people who make up for each other's shortcomings, or balance each other, like if one is really impulsive it helps when the other is level headed or a planner, or else you just get an echo chamber of rash decision making (or, on the other end, no spontaneity!) I like seeing how their differences effect the other. It's a really fun dynamic to read about.

Enemies to lovers, Enemies with benefits: +4

I mean, I'm a snowbaz fan so I gotta right? I do think though that the idea of true enemies to lovers is usually not done it a way that really works for me, because a lot of the time i cant see why these people end up together, because its all anger and hate lust and sometimes it doesn't ever evolve past that, or we just skip the bit where we see them getting along. Ideally theres enemies to friends to lovers, or at the very least friendship within the lovers realm.

I guess what I'm saying is they still need to like each other or else it make me sad.

Friends with benefits: +2

Ehhh is it benefits to full on love? I don't really connect with allo perspectives on sexual relationships, like I get them intellectually but I don't jive with them on an emotional level, so there has to be that emotional draw for me, that underlying romance. I mean tho, @fatalfangirl stacy is writing an excellent fic on this premise right now that I absolutely love because there are clearly feelings involved. But it also might fall more into the realm of the next trope on this list ... which is ...

Sex to feelings: +10

Oh yes yes yes. Pining while actively having sex is absolutely my thing.

Fake dating/relationship: -1

I am not really opposed. This is just a very romcom trope for me in that it rarely delivers really big honest emotions, its usually a lot of fun contrivance. Which is definitely a good time and has an appeal, but I generally don't take to these stories as much as others. I think its one that really depends on how its written, because I have read some REALLY good ones too.

Friends to lovers: +6

I like this a lot, I think it can have a good amount of tension when done right which is important for me in a story. Plus I love the slow burn of feelings, and also just the depth of emotion and comfort you get from friends to lovers, and sometimes it can be genuinely hard when one of those friends is dating other people, or if theres a really interesting thing keeping them apart. Yeah, I like it.

Found Family: +1

I don't feel a specific way about it, definitely not a turn off. I've read a few really really sweet fics that frame the trio (Baz, Simon and Penny) as found family, which is nice. Generally just fine about it.

Hurt/Comfort: +10

PUT IT DIRECTLY. INTO MY MOUTH. I am a fucking sap for hurt/comfort. It gives me the swoops. There is fucking nothing I like better than lovers (or almost lovers) comforting each other and taking care of each other, emotionally, physically, spiritually, whatever. It's sexy to me. It affects me deeply.

Love Triangle: -7

I fuckin hate love triangles actually, in all manner of media. Like, it's not a sure thing that it'll put me off a fic on sight, but I seriously can't think of any examples where this trope didn't make me deeply unhappy.

Poly, open relationships: -5

Mmm I'm very monogamous and also have bad history with open relationships so I definitely don't seek this out and it's generally a big turn off for me in a fic. But that being said I am deeply interested in the complexity of managing an open relationship (something sort of touched on in Someone Wicked) and there are definitely some throuples that I can totally get behind. I am allergic to most snowbaz throuples except sid/simon/baz (catch me one day writing some delectable threeway smut for Dre.)

Mistaken/hidden identity: +2

I truly don't know if I've ever read a story with this that like, really drew me in a specific way? I don't think this is a regular snowbaz trope either, and I admittedly don't wander too far from the snowbaz fic these days. I'm not opposed, just don't have a specific affinity for it.

Monsterfucking: +6

I like monsterfucking, but its gotta be tied to emotions. (Those emotions can be overwhelming incoherent ecstasy tho.)

Pregnancy: -9

I want kids and I like kids, don't care to read about them or pregnancy. That being said, I have read nearly every mpreg fic in this fandom (snowbaz) because you all are too talented and too fucking powerful. But it took me a while to click on them, generally.

Second Chance: +8

I do actively seek this tag out, because I am a sadist, but breakup angst also really truly hurts me. As someone who's a well known angstweaver (which I definitely just made up) most angst is appealing to me, delicious to read, exquisite, etc, but breakup angst wounds me deep ya'll. I hate thinking of them not together. I hate thinking of them thinking they are better off not together. I hate IT it makes me cry all of my tears.

But I love the path of recovery and finding their way back to each other. That shit is GREAT.

Slowburn: +10

Yeah baby gimme that pining. I love a slowburn because I love tension, and you get such good fucking tension when it takes a lot of work for them to get together. Also you just see more rounded, complex characterization because they are generally working through feelings and spending time together and just building up that relationship. And I'm a sucker for it, makes the get together all the sweeter. I love all kinds of burns, but slow burn gets me good.

Soulmates: +9

Yes, absolutely yes to soulmate fics. I also love a trope reversal here specifically, because there's a part of me that's also obsessed with the choice over destiny factor and seeing how that comes into play meaningfully, but I will say that the vast majority of Snowbaz soulmate fics have been really fucking good and it's a tag I purposefully seek out.

Also tagging @shrekgogurt @theearlgreymage @bookish-bogwitch @moodandmist @messofthejess @raenestee @facewithoutheart @martsonmars and @you-remind-me-of-the-babe

[comradeboyhalo]

Okay—you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to..! But I’m actually SO curious on your essay thoughts of q!Bad in 4halo fics. Because (I think) it’s kind of rare that q!Bad is depicted accurately in.. most qsmp ship fics. And I feel like q!Bad always becomes.. obsessed with romance with q!Forever in many 4halo fics?? Or super open + emotionally stable?? I don’t know how to explain it, but that’s why I’m curious of your thoughts (because I’ve read your fics and 100% trust your characterizations, especially of BBH cubitos <3)

hihi always down to ramble. and i agree, a lot of bad's flaws are smoothed over in 4halo fics, which makes him incredibly ooc. also, i dont think that these mischaracterizations are necessarily bad, i understand that in fluff fics (or angst fics, which im guilty of) sometimes theres no room in tone to fully capture all of q!bad's complexities. but that doesn't mean i cant have some gripes!

i dont think this is exclusive to 4halo, but 4halo is also bad's current biggest ship, so a lot of it just happens to fall on it. but i really hate how fanon!bad gets stripped down to a mere love interest who is just...very perfect in how he interacts with romance. he wants to go on cute dates, he confesses in a very sweet way. he is kind and nice and a little insecure, and is just so boring. its very much reminiscent of old skephalo fics, where bad is seen as "innocent" and then any other interesting trait of his gets stripped away. i also end up feeling im reading about a highschooler, when q!bad is 11k+ and cc!bad (obviously influential of his character) is in his late 20s.

again, i understand why people write 4halo on cute dates and first kisses. thats what fanfic is for! but i cant help but see the entirety of the ao3 page full of these very...allo-typical romance plots and think "...he would not fucking say that." q!bad is messy as fuck! if you don't interpret him as arospec, then hes at the very least repressed, and not in a cute YA romance way. a 1k fic of pining that ends in a nice love confession just doesnt convince me im sorry!

and then there's the blue diamond obstacle that gets in the way of 4halo monogamy....skeppy. again, i get why most 4halo shippers arent going to mention him, cause theyre just not into anything skephalo. i cant blame them for that. but im a master nitpicker, so ill still nitpick cause this is my blog. bad brushing over skeppy is ooc. bad acting as if skeppy is in the past is ooc. bad pursuing any form of relationship without including skeppy is ooc. bad choosing any other person but skeppy to be his #1 is ooc. and yeah it sucks for shipping if you dislike q!skephalo, but thats how it is and its not changing. and also any fics that push bad to "move on" from skeppy is just ??? not only is that his soulmate across lifetimes, but skeppy isnt dead? hes just not on the island? help??? bad has two hands, but one hand will always hold skeppy's and he's made that abundantly clear many times.

anyways im also not immune to q!bad butchering in 4halo fics! ill admit that, in writing the hanahaki au, i couldn't really find time to fit a lot of q!bad's humor into it, and he ended up more openly angsty and sad and vulnerable then he really is, or would ever be. so i totally get it, and im fine if other qbad viewers despise how he's written in it. however i will stand by the fact that q4halo would never pursue a traditional relationship together, and i chose the ending to be ambiguous because thats how i believe their relationship (and feelings) are: ambiguous. that's why, to me, 4halo is so good. i don't want to read about them confessing their feelings. i want to read about how their relationship is an undefined, confusing mess that will never be defined, and im just so surprised that there aren't more fics like that out there.

[vivithefolle]

Hey its me who left a comments on your Quora, and bc im a negative hater of Hermione that will make her worshippers cry, i wanna just copy and repeat my unpopular opinions here to yours in order to spread my negativity :p

I think its kinda funny how Rowling self inserted into Hermione but forgot herself is a adult woman, and Hermione is a teenager sometimes, but like only sometimes.

A lot of Hermiones rule bendings and actions just sounds like what an 20s or 30s something would want to do, and would have full conviction as well as planning ability to carry it out. Sorta like the way you cant file a lawsuit and WIN if you are 10 but can if you are 21. Rowling wishes she could do what Hermione can do but forgot she was writing a teenager, then went "oh its ok. She settled it all in the end off pages."

Rowling will be like "Hermione is me and so mature and i wanted to do that to people i hate all my life" when it comes to time traveling - to take more classes than her peers because its fair where? - and "punishing" a bad journalist who spread stupid rumors and "punishing" the students and teachers she hated, or erasing her parents out of her records. Because only adults could break big rules like that and maybe deal with consequences. But then in the same books same chapters she will be like "Hermione is forever 13 year old and hates defying rules" when it come to the characters emotional development. And worse, after that couldnt write all the messy logical backlashes and consequences that this teenagers actions left.

Coupling with Emma Watsons casting and all the Mary Sue script changes influencing later books, the result is the worse, most self entitled, inconsistent, sloppily written female character ever created among all the real, logical teenage characters. Some like Harry is Mary Sue-ish, but hes at least consistent and logical to a teenager. Hermione is a Sue and couldnt even be a decent one that makes a lick of sense.

we like to dunk on Movie Hermione, and her looks and the Ron bashing can make us dislike her because thats not book Hermione, but in terms of being a Mary Sue , movie Hermione is actually a much better written character than book Hermione. One is at least consistent and is a character despite "perfect". Movie Hermiones lines and moments are still things a , very perfect, schoolgirl can know and do. Book Hermione cant decide if shes a teenager character with emotional flaws or a 30 something 4th wall goddess with super meta powers that can solve every characters romance problems. Like you cant choose both of these, Rowling.

its so frustrating bc this is actually why its so hard to convince Hermione lovers and criticizers on points from either side on her personality and her relationships with others. Because a very blazen competent girl that could "punish" teachers and students and new reporters alike on the basis of very adult, very real LAW and ORDER can not act like an jealous, immature 15 year old that also cries all the time with no handle on her emotions, is "book smart" and stick for rules, and vice versa. Which is she?

i now dont really care for Hermione and Ron. She ruined the couple for me. its not that she could be an asshole to him, but because shes not a character. Shes a vessel.

_____

Vivi's commentary: Well darn that is a brutal assessment! I do believe that what the things that make Hermione feel so disconnected is the lack of consequences. I mean, the way she "punishes" Rita and Marietta is totally the way a teenager fantasizes about punishing the people who hurt them, but the fact that Hermione manages to do it without ever having it bite her in the ass is the part that's really making her a Mary Sue for me.

[sofoulandfairaday]

My black sisters early headcannons

I agree with you about narcissa not being soft, I mean if she was she probably would be miserable for the whole of the series and shes not, and the redeeming factor for the malfoys is that they all love each other very much. She and lucius got together in her fifth year. And got married straight after she finished school. She had however had pregnancy problems, so they were overjoyd when draco was born. Narcissa was made prefect but not head girl. Of the sisters she was the least interested in school but she did do enough to get good grades in all her classes.

With Andromeda i think she actually loves all the pureblood functions like the balls and the rest. But most the fics ive read has her hating them. And that not being able to take part in the high society was the worst part of running away for her. I think she was as prejudiced as the other 2 when starting school. And my headcanon is that she and ted got paired for a class very early on and he just decided he wanted to be her friend and he just did not let up. Snatching small conversations and giving small gifts. It took years for this to actually work and andromeda to decide she wanted to be friends. And that and only that made her slowly change her mindset. After the 2 war i could see her and narcissa write letters to each other but i also cant see either of them writing first. And its not like andromeda would attended bellas funeral. I also think of the sisters she and bella were the ones who were the closest. I think bellatrix wedding was the last event she attended. And the fact that after this bellatrix was very busy made it easier to run away. I also headcanon her as the best spellcaster of the three but that after the 1st war she does not keep training. I also think the reason she wasnt more involved in the order because she doesnt want to fight her former friends and family.(opposite i think to sirius who i think found Joy in it).

As for bellatrix she is the one i think who enjoys balls the least but she still thinks they are somewhat fun, she leaves as soon as socially acceptable to do other fun "afterparty" things. By the time she started school she had decided who her friends were and those were her friends for all 7 years. She also really enjoys learning and was the most studious. She took as many classes o.w.l.s and n.e.w.t.s as possible and excelled in all. She could have been both prefect and head girl but made sure ahead of time she was not interested because it would cut into study time. Not that school classes was the only thing she studied. Due to being and excellent student and some charm and high standing she got to read any book she wanted from the forbidden section of the library. She always asked with a good and untrue excuse. She was far from kind to muggleborns but she was not a bully in school. Only hexing those who annoyed her or slighted her some other way. She actually found it boring and did always had an air of "can you get done soon" when her friends were bullying. Bellatrix found however out that she liked inflicting pain the first time she did it, this was at the very end of school though so she didnt terrorize the school. As soon as she was out of school she travelled to learn more. Around her 20 birthday her parents started bugging her about marriage because she had never shown any interest in romance. She after a bit of this went to rodolphus and said lets get married in which he responded wathever you want(I think he is in love with her but knows she doesnt love him and therefore dont expect anything and they are best friends). He proposed the next day at a garden party with the finest and most expensive of rings. Though there had been talk with and about voldemort in her friendgroup. Bellatrix first met voldemort at her wedding(I really like this headcanon). They immediatly got along well because Bellatrix had gotten lightly into dark magic and wanted to learn more and voldemort really liked how much interest she showed esp coupled with that she is very powerful.

Hi, anon! Oh, gosh, thank you so much for this ask - I agree with so many of these, almost all of them! They're so perfect.

Yes to Lucius and Cissy being together since Hogwarts, yes to her being Prefect but not Head Girl, super-duper yes to Narcissa with pregnancy problems. I have a very specific headcanon in mind for this. I think they had several miscarriages (Bella had at least one too; difficulties with conceiving children is something I envision for all the women of the Black Family, which may also be due to the fact that they all select their spouses from a very small pool) and they finally managed to conceive with Severus' help, using some sort of potion and very later on (if Cissy is done with school around 1972-73, why did her and Lucius only have Draco in 1980? It's not like she was involved in the fighting...)

I also agree that Andromeda was quite different from Sirius and her leaving her sisters was much less of a nuanced political position (I see her as someone with many biases and a lot of unlearning to do- never mind the fact that she also doesn't want her daughter to marry Remus because he's a werewolf). I think she loved her family - sisters, parents, cousins - and partly her world (balls, fancy restaurants and holidays...) I can see her having a difficult time letting go. Her abandonment of her family is something that's much more selfish than we think: she liked Ted, and her family said she couldn't have him, so she took him anyways. My problem with her is that I can never seem to write her the way I want to. I can't seem to get her voice right.

Yes to Bella's wedding being the last event she ever attended (something Narcissa would always be resentful of).

Sirius is someone with a very black-and-white morality (ironically, the same as Bella), while Andromeda isn't in my opinion. And I can see her being conflicted over her position in the war, even willing to forgive her sisters until Tonks' death, of course. Yes to neither Andy nor Cissy being able to bring themselves to write first after the second war. And yes to Andromeda not being there for Bellatrix's funeral. She might have gone, even after Sirius, if it weren't for Nymphadora. I just can't see her forgiving Bella for that.

Yes to Bella being the most studious, and the best in school. Yes to her having a small group of friends. I can see her being Prefect and Head Girl, but I can also see the opposite - her not being given it/refusing it not on the basis of grades but temperament/free time/other injustices etc. Yes to Rodolphus being in love with her and them having a good relationship, yes to her choosing him personally. I headcanon that she meets Voldemort at her engagement party! (At least in the story I'm writing, but I am very flexible on this- it's not the when it's the how for me.) Yes to her being a natural sadist, not that much of a bully in school, but definitely respected. Maybe she partook in her free time.

It's a happy headcanon for her to have travelled after school. I definitely think she wanted to, but in my head, her parents had always refused it, saying that it wasn't proper for a young witch like her to travel the world without a chaperone. It also fuels, for me, her need for adventure as a young woman. I do like it though (I tend to make everything tragic; I don't know if you've noticed but I love angst!)

Yes yes yes to her seeing Voldemort as more than a political figure but as a mentor, a teacher, and him choosing her above all else to make her his pupil.

[raytorosaurus]

bit of a weird ask but I saw a twitter post saying they were 'devastated' over what frank said in an interview about performing/writing in ls dunes compared to some other bands (theyre assuming that the 'other bands' means mcr because they cant think of the 20+ other bands that hes been in) and after reading it a second time it doesn't even seem that negative?? it just talks about different processes and his excitement for dunes, but I still feel down anyway now because of that reaction, and it really makes me doubt that part of the fandom's faith in the band and its members im kinda close to quitting the fandom because of this and idk how the tumblr/twitter gang here survives it y'all are troopers, im unsure how to avoid that kind of doomposting

sorry i totally forgot to answer this the other day, i hope you see this!

but yeah, i see the same thing and it is. pretty irritating haha. it speaks to the unrealistic traits and behaviours fandom has applied to these ppl over the years/decades - which are harmless enough on the surface, but left unchecked you end up with doomposting or disproportionate levels of discourse when one of them doesn't behave the way their textpostified personalities would have you believe hahaha. if frank isn't anything but reverential towards mcr then he must hate it. if gerard puts time and work into his artistic and career pursuits that aren't related to mcr he must be giving up on the band like he supposedly did in 2012. if ray, who hasn't done a single interview since 2016, isn't on stage showing frank public affection or admiring him on twitter, he must be bossy and arrogantly taking all the glory for mcr's guitar parts and musicality. if mikey does anything it's gotta have something to do with gerard or mcr because obvs he doesn't exist outside the band etc etc. again none of these things are like. problematic or bad**, just kind of. annoying to engage with as an adult in the space i go to enjoy myself hahaha.

but this specific discussion abt frank implicitly dissing mcr also cropped up after that podcast frank did with travis, where he discussed writing music with ls dunes vs every other band/project he's been involved in. which, let's remember, is a fucking lot. how many albums has frank made or been part of? too many to easily count. only about four or five of those were with my chemical romance. ls dunes is only set apart from the rest because they're currently active after mcr's huge reunion, and they're a supergroup so they're getting a lot of press attention. people have never batted an eye in the past when frank has discussed how great it is to be working with this or that musician on this or that album - it's just the timing of ls dunes and our own high hopes for new mcr music that make people take this one in particular so personally.

on top of that... we've always known mcr has a fraught and stressful writing process??? that is like. a major part of the lore? we're all compelled by the insane amount of unlikely success mcr achieved in their careers, and by the fact that they were always controversial. we reblog quotes about gerard saying mcr's purpose was always to be against something, to undermine expectations, to infiltrate, contaminate etc. i thought this was something we were all drawn to about mcr? so i'll never understand the shock and disappointment when frank makes the simple statement that writing with ls dunes is easier, less stressful, and more lighthearted than writing with mcr. like...duh it is? mcr have always been open about how much they put into writing albums - and also about how they're proud of what they created, and that they consider each other cherished family.

the most annoying part for me is when people take quotes about frank working with travis and twist them into some kind of dig at/criticism of ray. i can only assume these people aren't used to working with others in a creative capacity, especially long term, because i just totally can't understand where it comes from lol. as someone who's read/watched every guitar-related mcr interview i've ever been able to get my hands on: ray and frank have literally never been anything other than fully complimentary of, respectful to, and affectionate with one another. ray was far from the first guitarist frank ever worked with and leagues from the only one. also, creative partnerships are extremely complex and every one is completely unique, with it's own strengths and difficulties. if ray and frank didn't love playing with each other they wouldn't have done it for years and years. that doesn't mean frank can't vocally love playing with other guitarists??? these things are not contradictory and appreciating aspects of one creative partnership is not equivalent to bad-mouthing a different one? like that is just not how it works skdkdjd

anyway i think a lot of it comes down to the fact that, for us, we see these people as parts of my chemical romance. naturally, because that's the reason we know they exist! but all of these people live rich and full and complex lives like any other person. the only parts of those lives that we generally see much of are the my chemical romance parts. we look for mcr in everything they say, which is understandable but unrealistic. all we need to do it keep that in mind imo

**(tho ppl's tendency to pit ray and frank against each other for some reason, which used to be a way common but is unfortunately a sentiment i'm starting to see crop up again in some places, definitely can get. suspicious and uncomfortable. especially considering that frank is the fan favourite so these pointless comparisons tend to err in his favour, and in either direction they tend to be very shallow and uninformed anyway. but that's a separate conversation)

wow i literally did not intend to turn this into a giant essay im so sorry. kudos if you made it this far lol. and i feel you anon, it's discouraging and puts a bad taste in my mouth when i come to this fandom for fun and fulfillment. i wish i had better advice because im feeling a little similar but just try to remind yourself that other people's opinions are just that. i find it helps if you can curate your own dash/feed or make friends in more discussion-friendly spaces like dms or gcs or discord servers. or even a priv twitter account with a few like-minded mutuals where you can vent ur shared frustrations over things without making it a whole big deal HAHAHA. the less time you spend scrolling thru ppl's public posts and the more time you spend diving into interviews, podcasts, videos, the web archive etc to detach yourself a little from group fandom-think the better you'll probably feel about mcr tbh! also long as you have friends or close mutuals that's all that matters imo <3

[duckiemimi]

Dont you think the way gojo teases utahime almost looks like he likes her? His tone while teasing her is so boyish.The opposite attracts kinda dynamic between them I couldn’t ignore. Although im gego shipper I’ve come across this interesting tweet a while ago

“he's strong, she's weak

he likes sweets, she hates them

he cant drink, she loves it

he's perfect, she has an obvious face scar

he's very radical, she's a traditionalist”

What do you think of their dynamic? I love your takes so much. Loved PFAM xo

personally, i don’t see anything romantic between them! i’ve talked about my perception of their dynamic here! now let’s get onto the tweet in question.

this reads very, “he was a boy / she was a girl / can i make it anymore obvious?” to me. i’m not sure if you want to base a ship off of the power imbalance they have (“he’s strong, she’s weak”), but even then, i don’t think gege would push this narrative because while his writing leaves much to be desired when it comes to his female characters, he’s always empowered them! take nobara, for example, during her fight with momo.

or maki’s whole arc (i answered an ask about it here!). why should utahime be “weak”, especially for the sake of a pairing? it wouldn’t be inline with the more feminist portrayals of women in the story.

i don’t think gege would frame utahime as “weak” to pair her up with gojo, who we know was actively searching for someone on his level since geto’s departure. would he have really settled for someone he considered weak, ergo unable to understand him? (his words, not mine.) you could argue that interdependence and connection could’ve been lessons in his character arc, but that doesn’t necessarily mean romance either.

at the end of the day, i don’t take a liking to the ship because it doesn’t make sense to me. don’t let this deter you from thinking differently, though! shipping should be fun!!

(also, saying gojo is “very radical” is funny to me considering he had the very real power to turn the system upside down, to make real change as a physical and metaphorical pillar, but he chose to play the long game by staying in the system and working with it when he knew how ineffective it was at keeping sorcerers alive/inside. mind you, this man was the most powerful sorcerer of his time who was also the head of one of the big three clans, the oligarchy of jujutsu, so “very radical” is definitely not what i’d use to describe him. “anti-conservative” is the more appropriate term, i think!)

and also, thank you so much for reading PFAM!! <3

[cathackz]

Pupdog and It bc they sound interesing

(Ask game)

YAAAAY YAAAAAAY

ahem

Full Name: Pupdog Dogadult

Gender and Sexuality: Pangender, Aroace

Pronouns: He/any

Ethnicity/Species: British, Caninecaste (dogboy)

Birthplace and Birthdate: Britain, Oct 1

Guilty Pleasures: Anything cutesy or immature

Phobias: Ailurophobia probably

What They Would Be Famous For: Uhhhhhh. i dunno bejsndkssm

What They Would Get Arrested For: Attempted Murder

OC You Ship Them With: NO!!!!!! AAGH

OC Most Likely To Murder Them: Kitkat

Favorite Movie/Book Genre: I think he would enjoy slice of life anime / manga :D

Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: his ass does NOT like isekai.

Talents and/or Powers: he can play da electric guitar :) also he’s probably overall kind of a child prodigy ill be frank

Why Someone Might Love Them: He’s easy to root for! He’s basically the only character in the cast of Fragmented Multiverse thats actively trying to defeat kitkat

Why Someone Might Hate Them: they could find his constant sobbing annoying

How They Change: Through rigorous therapy and coping

Why You Love Them: sad little dogboy…hes a fun character to explore!

Full Name: N/A. It canonically doesnt have a name hekenekejekek

Gender and Sexuality: vaugely fem, unlabled

Pronouns: It/Its (capitalized)

Ethnicity/Species: GOD

Birthplace and Birthdate: Outside of time of space, as old as the universe itself

Guilty Pleasures: Blogging and writing fanfiction. thats right god is chronically online!

Phobias: Forgiveness.

What They Would Be Famous For: Uhhh. Tumblr post goes extremely viral i guess

What They Would Get Arrested For: NOTHING!! YOU CANT ARREST GOD YOU FOOL

OC You Ship Them With: Furry :] two immortal beings chilling pretending to be normal humans. yaoi!!! yuri!!!!

OC Most Likely To Murder Them: Most of the cast of Fragmented Multiverse. Minus The Storyteller.

Favorite Movie/Book Genre: Yaoi. im kidding im kidding it probably likes general romance

Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: miscommunication

Talents and/or Powers: being god. yknow.

Why Someone Might Love Them: Interesting character! and rather funny at times not to toot my own horn

Why Someone Might Hate Them: It kinda sucks as a person

How They Change: It starts to question if its a bad person or not, and spends the entire story flipping flopping on the awnser.

Why You Love Them: It is an absolutely FASCINATING character. moral complexities ahoy!

[luxsea]

so i finally beat bg3 for the first time last night :))

also hap halloweenie :]

(not all but some) thoughts dump

im honestly so glad i got spoiled for karlachs ending back at the start of act 2 so i had time to go thru the stages of grief, make sad playlists, etc bc my tav/karlach really hit me like a truck. i knew i was going to romance her before i even got the game bc she literally is the reason i started playing to begin with but doing her route feels very right for a first playthrough bc imo despite how devastating and lacking her story can be it sure does shine when its good. her introspective moments you can only get if you romance her are everything to me. knowing she cant be saved in the end lead me to choose more accepting dialogue options which lead to infinitely more satisfying and at times inspiring scenes than if i pushed the "what if"

as for the very end, in a way karlachs dying scene and/or going to avernus scene is a lot more than what most characters get even if theyre youre romanced character... despite her ending being shafted to begin with?? which is ridiculous. (correct me if im wrong. most of them had nothing to say and what ive seen uploaded ie shadowhearts romanced ending is so meh) lae'zels orpheus ending did make me tear up, everyone else was just kinda standing there wearing ridiculous armor bc i forgot.......

despite everything im really happy with karlachs scenes? and idk if thats just bc they were the romanced versions and bc i didnt have my hopes up for her (if i hadnt been spoiled i wouldve been LIVID) but it rlly was one of the most touching moments for me. the "how'd i do?" "you were spectacular in every way" "for you. and for the city, and for myself, and blah blah. but most of all for you" caressing tavs face and her repeating back to herself that she was spectacular like shes at peace just by those words alone. "it's the one thing i can't beat, isn't it? same below as above. i love. you." and the blue flames of all her love for them searing hot white and killing her engine faster?!? ough "you more than anything. i saw- ...goodbye, sun. goodbye, sea. goodbye" I FEEL SICK I FEEL UNWELL. i should be crying but my heart just aches she's just everything to me okay!!

and the avernus scene is better than i thought it would be, the music is so sweet and badass, sharing cigars!!, lots of gay fuel for my fire, the feeling that its just the start of a new journey and not the end, charging together into the hells its so mwah mwah as long as you ignore the trauma and the fact that we couldve solved this any other way!! (do wish wyll wasnt treated like an awkward third wheel if the three of you go considering he's the one who advocates for her and going to avernus is part of his ending too. but ofc im also going she's my wife and the interaction is rlly touching)

as far as the rest of the game the emperors writing was so flimsy and uh they did a really good job making it feel like your choices didnt matter much in the end considering the praise its gotten and how the game was marketed. rip it needs some serious work but i didnt hate it. karlach brain worms take a lot of credit

my highest praises overall are that ive never felt this attached to a player character that i've made before and ive never seen a more memorable cast of npcs. there's too many stand out moments to count that it makes the insane amount of lag and bugs i had worth powering thru

BUT IM FINALLY FREE I CAN FINALLY REPLAY AND DO IT ALL AGAIN BUT BETTER

[cluelessbees]

Okay….

A concept— Dash and Lily Byler AU (I posted a part 2-ish)

Idk if you guys have watched dash and lily but it’s a very cute season-long like cheesy Christmas romance. The whole premise is that Lily puts this book in a bookstore that Dash finds and they essentially communicate through the notebook. They don’t know each others identities but they have to do a dare in order for the other to answer their question.

Im like not explaining it well but it’s very cute 😭. So like I was wondering ….byler au 👀?

So now enjoy my take on their notebook entries to each other—

(For context this one is Will’s to Mike after Mike proposed being called Blue + Mike’s entry afterwards)

Idk if it’s any good but enjoy—

***

Blue huh? 

You really aren’t giving me any clues to your name? I guess you do really like the mystery aspect of this all.

I guess I’ll continue in the theme of colours. Call me yellow. Or…think of me as yellow. I don’t think yellow works as well as a name compare to Blue, but it’s my favourite colour.

It just feels warm….which feels sorta weird to say. How can a colour feel warm? 

I don’t know. It just- reminds me of sun and how it would tickle my skin when I would lay on the grass in the park with my family. It’s just one of those warm memories. Something I think about when I want to escape.

That’s- a really weird thing to admit to a boy I’ve never met. But it’s just easier to tell you these things I guess? You’re easy to talk to- or write to.

I’m sorry if I’m being weird. I hope I’m not scaring you away.

Because ….i like talking to you blue. I hope you like talking to me.

Anyways, enough about me. It’s time for your dare. 

You’ve mentioned never really being an artist, huh? I’m not buying it. I think you like being creative. You just hate showing it.

I’ve attached a drawing of a map to this art centre. Go to it. I’ve booked you for a 4pm painting lesson. Let me know what you draw.

Don’t focus on perfection just have fun, okay? 

Give the book to the instructor, tall guy with a weird mustache you’ll know what I mean when you see it.

From, 

Yellow (?) (i have no idea of yellow is working or not)

***

Dear Yellow,

I’ll have to admit- it doesn’t work as well as Blue, but that’s okay. I think I’ll continue calling you notebook boy. I like the mystery element behind it. You’re very mysterious to me. I cant help wanting to know more about you.

You do remind me of yellow though- the warmth that is. I don’t know how else to describe it you just seem like such a warm person. Which- is weird to admit because I don’t even know you but it’s true.

Also, you don’t have to worry about scaring me off. I’m far too intrigued in knowing who you are to be scared off by anything. 

And….I happen to like you too, Notebook Boy

(See notebook boy just works better)

Anyways, a finger painting class huh? Have to admit I did not expect that. You’re always filled with surprises.

At first I thought you were just being sadistic. Like- you wanted me to stain my hands as some sort of punishment for a previous dare. But- I have to admit it was fun getting messy.

And I managed to get a sweet finger painted rainbow out of it. I’m sure I can’t compete with the art you make. You’re probably the most talented artist I know (I’m aware I haven’t seen your art yet but I’m still right.) But I like it- I think. It’s a decent painting.

Scratch that my friend just asked me if it was made by my little sister— okay so maybe not decent, but I had fun. Maybe…I do like creativity. Although no one will know but you.

I hope I get to see your paintings someday.

For now, i leave you with a dare and a question. 

What’s your taste of music like, Notebook Boy?

Mine is a mixed of genres, but I thought it would be fun for you to try something new. You seem very reserved so…I’ve attached a ticket to a friends rock show. It’s for tomorrow at 9. He makes good music. I’ve always like the atmosphere of his gigs. They’re so loud and the energy just seeps through the veins. 

I hope you like it. 

Blue 

P.S. hand the book over to my friend at the end of the show! He’s the guitarist. Tell him Blue sent you. 

***

I have more if y'all want but yeah--- thoughts? (Part 2)

[pyreofsunflowers]

I dislike soooooo much of the writing in Ultimate and how they handled the characters n the plot but I think the WORST thing in that entire show is the way they wrote Alucard...

He's monstrous, sadistic and ultra-violent - sure, that's not my problem. My PROBLEM is that he's written in this stupid try hard edgelord fashion, which is NEVER interesting EVER.

I want Alucard to be sadist, I want him to be a violent monster who can kill people in horrific ways without remorse. But I also want him to be a character, and a well written one at that.

in MY mind - it's more like he's able to keep his demons in check (especially considering he's a government agent - ? and Integra seems pretty cautious about collateral damage - ?) under a suave, classy demeanor that's still ridiculously imposing and scary but not necessarily insane. When he chooses to go crazy - he goes CRAZY believe me. I'm not one of those people who think the gore in Ultimate is too much or try hard, it's the best part of the show. That being said ~ I also like the idea that he's lost an element of his control - or that it's not as good as it used to be and he (somewhat regularly) slips up and lets his emotions get the best of him. Of course, I imagine that he generally regrets these mistakes - either because it scares Integra/Seras or because he hates himself for loosing control and thinks he should have been stronger. Depending on the context.

oh and should I mention the whole edgelord thing really doesn't work with him being Count Dracula? Who's very much not an edgelord?

I just feel like he could have been such a complex character - especially if they had leaned more into a romantic plotline with him and Seras. How he'd be so afraid of hurting her, but how she so desperately wants to be corrupted by him. WHEREEEEE was them fucking on camera HIRANO - i KNOW you draw porn.

So desperately do I want him to have his monsters just below the surface, I want him to be scared of himself and to hate himself for it. I want him to try and try to keep himself from hurting the one he loves, to try and tell her this isn't what she deserves - that she's too pure and too innocent for this life. And I want Seras to tell him 'no' to become a monster like him and to love him every minute of it. I mean - if this is the character he should have, in my mind it makes the most sense that it's explored through romance. Especially one as tragic as theirs, one that has lasted centuries and has always ended in death.

Like ughhh just imagine how goood it would be when Alucard realizes Seras is just as fucked up as he is and he's able to be himself around her. how much havoc they can wreck together. how nasty he can fuck her <- sorry. But that's defiantly part of it. Like imagine how nervous he must have been to touch her for the first time, how much taking her virginity would weigh on him considering how rough and sadistic he is. Hellsing is like the one show I think that would have benefited from a consensual sex scene between the two leads. IT WOULD have been soooo good and could have given su soooo much introspection into there relationship.... Ugh but I can dream Ig, and it seems people generally really like edgelord-card but personally I cant stand him. where's my complex characters dammit. whatever. this is for a gorefest anime that isn't even supposed to be deep. But i wish it was better, If you even care.