#Bill Rebane

[rhetthammersmithhorror]

The Game | 1984 — aka The Cold

[atomic-crusader]

This past week I went to the Merrill Historical Society to visit their (free!) exhibit on Wisconsin's very own Bill Rebane. At the exhibit they had the original cage used to make one of the two giant spider props (the one with the Volkswagen was stolen long ago, unfortunately). The fur on it is a recreation of the original, though some of the original fur still exists. Of interest is a short comic used to promote the film to distributors.

[astralbondpro]

Blood Harvest (1987) // Dir. Bill Rebane

[chaoticdesertdweller]

The Demons of Ludlow, 1983

Dir. Bill Rebane

[schlock-luster-video]

On April 1, 1988, The Giant Spider Invasion debuted in the Soviet Union.

[mater-argento]

Japanese poster for b-movie "The Great Spider Invasion" (1975)

[weirdlookindog]

The Giant Spider Invasion (1975)

[davealmost]

Monster a Go-Go

[mariocki]

The Game (The Cold, 1984)

"The sign says no physical exertion! Is it safe?"

"Oh, come on, baby! Of course it's safe - I had a vasectomy."

"Well, in that case..."

[everythingisahoax]

This vintage VHS of Monster A Go-Go suggests a way better movie than the real thing...and that’s pretty depressing when you think about it.

[adamwatchesmovies]

The Giant Spider Invasion (1975)

Someone needs to make a documentary about the making of The Giant Spider Invasion. This laughable picture about space arachnids terrorizing a small town should’ve been a fun but ultimately forgettable “big bug” movie. Instead, it’s a delightfully memorable one-of-a-kinder. The special effects are so bad it makes you wonder what was going through people’s heads as they were shooting.

In rural Wisconsin, a meteorite impact leaves behind strange geodes filled with diamonds and alien spiders that grow to enormous size. While the unsuspecting yokels go about their lives, Drs. J.R. Vance (Steve Brodie) and Jenny Langer (Barbara Hale) look for a way to close the intergalactic gateway from which the spiders are drawing their terrible strength.

At a skinny 84 minutes, The Giant Spider Invasion goes by quickly unless its attention is centered on a group of characters that really have no place in this movie. Dan Kester (Robert Easton) is cheating on his wife, Ev (Leslie Parrish). She doesn’t know but might suspect something because the man is always unhappy at home. That is, until he discovers diamonds in their field. Who cares if the cattle have been reduced to skeletons and there’s a dead body nearby? They're going to be rich! Meanwhile, Ev’s younger sister, Terry (Diane Lee Hart) witnesses the initial meteor impact while out with her boyfriend late at night. These people are only in the movie so they can be attacked later, which I guess makes them ‘important’ because the scenes of “terror” are the movie’s best.

There are quite a few spiders throughout the movie. These range from pet store tarantulas to unconvincing puppets, to what is pretty obviously a van dressed up as a gargantuan arachnid. We get a pretty good look at that last one and if it were a parade float, it would be impressive. As a beast that’s supposed to have people screaming and running for their lives, it’s hilarious. The legs move randomly and whenever it "eats", the actors have to heave themselves into its gaping maw so the technician inside will know when to dump buckets of fake blood everywhere. Whenever the beast appears, every trick in the book is used to obscure it. Either it’s shot from far away, or crowds of people are placed in front of it so that all we can see are the top of its body and the legs high above. This leads me to believe even in person it didn't look convincing. Compared to the puppets we see during the middle of the film, however, it's Jurassic Park. When Terry is attacked inside her home, it looks an awful lot like she’s wrestling with some furry pool noodles. It’s always funny and never gets old.

Also amusing is the grammatical garbage that’s being sold as “science” to explain what's happening. Unfortunately, the version of the film I watched didn’t have any subtitle options available but you still get the gist of it. Something about a black hole in the middle of the teeny crater where the spiders landed, and it feeding them waves from another dimension or something. It makes no sense.

The Giant Spider Invasion is so incompetent it's kind of cute. The special effects are a riot and when the spiders aren’t on-screen waving their furry arms, the plot is so inconsequential and lame you can effortlessly come up with sarcastic quips to throw at the screen. The beginning can be a bit slow but it makes it up during the conclusion, which pulls some camera tricks even someone who had never seen a movie before would point to and say “How dare you?!” Slightly slow introduction aside, this is what people think of they hear “so bad it’s good”. (March 4, 2022)

[rhetthammersmithhorror]

The Capture of Bigfoot | 1979

[atomic-crusader]

All that remains of the fur used to cover one of the giant spider props from The Giant Spider Invasion

[astralbondpro]

Twister’s Revenge! (1988) // Dir. Bill Rebane

[muttonchopsalley]

Twister's Revenge (1987)

@rhetthammersmith

[schlock-luster-video]

On December 30, 1976, The Giant Spider Invasion debuted in Mexico.