#Carlton school for the deaf

[phantompoguefangirl]

Rewatching Switched At Birth AGAIN.

One really frustrating thing that I haven't seen many people talk about is that there are several times where it is brought up that Carlton School is struggling financially and the Kennishes witness them lose programs and the school itself almost close, but yet NOT ONCE do they offer to donate money to the school BOTH THEIR DAUGHTERS GO TO.

John gets so upset when they cut the basketball team but then a few episodes later complains about how much money he gives to Buckner sports or whatever. Like DUDE ARE YOU DENSE??? You have one child still attending the rich white people school and he gives exactly zero fucks about going there so what are you even giving them the money for?

And Bay remarks that Kathryn could fund raise $5,000 out of mission hills in minutes but yet she never thinks to fund raise for Carlton? Even when she is literally at the school fighting to keep the play going? Not once does this ever occur to her??

I know it is mentioned in the episode where Daphne talks to the school board that the board is just full of bigots who only give money to the schools they favor but the Kennishes had so much power and could have done so much but they didn't and it makes me so upset.

To be fair, I guess we wouldn't have had the occupy carlton storyline if they had helped and that storyline was SO important for Deaf representation and raising awareness for how Deaf people are treated in the educational system.

But still. John and Kathryn suck for being rich and not using it to help Carlton.

[mamapriest]

The most iconic white dresses in cinema PART 1

VOGUE 2020

From Marilyn Monroe to Sharon Stone and Audrey Hepburn, Vogue looks back at the most legendary white dresses to have appeared on the big screen.

Among the iconic dresses of the cinema, the white dress remains one of our favorites. When it is not the traditional and classic uniform of the bride, the white dress has a sexy look, immortalized on screen by some of the greatest actresses of all time. From the mythical metro scene in The Seven Year Itch to the interrogation scene in Basic Instinct, the white dress is the number one asset of a more or less suggestive seduction. Here's the proof in pictures.

Grace Kelly in To Catch A Thief (1955)

The film: Imagined against a backdrop of palaces and jewelry thefts, Alfred Hitchcock's 1955 thriller To Catch A Thief was largely filmed at the Carlton, in front of its spectacular entrance as well as in its sublime interiors. Having always had a soft spot for the French Riviera, the American director filmed Grace Kelly there, more beautiful than ever, succumbing to the charm of jewelry thief Cary Grant. Notably in room 623, which was immortalized on the screen and is now called the Alfred Hitchcock Suite.

The dress: In 1955, the year before she married Prince Rainier III of Monaco, Grace Kelly appeared in a series of dresses, each more devastating than the last, in Alfred Hitchcock's To Catch A Thief (created by the incredible film costume designer Edith Head). It's a winner of a white dress.

Lauren Bacall in Written on the Wind (1956)

The film: Son of an oil merchant, Kyle Hadley, an alcoholic, falls in love with Lucy (Lauren Bacall) who makes him forget his vices. But when he learns that his wife is pregnant, even though he is infertile, his demons catch up with him until the final stroke of madness sets in.

The dress: In this sentimental, thriller-like drama, the sublime belted white silk dress worn by Lauren Bacall is a highlight. It is a true moment of grace that accompanies her secret.

Elizabeth Taylor in Cat on a Hot Tin Roof (1958)

The film: Adapted from Tennessee Williams's 1955 Broadway play of the same name, Richard Brooks's Cat on a Hot Tin Roof brings to the screen two sacred film icons, Elizabeth Taylor and Paul Newman, as a torn couple who blame each other for the dramas of their lives, against a backdrop of family breakdown and inheritance. Nominated for six Oscars, this film exudes pain and sensuality. A masterpiece.

The dress: Lying languidly on her wrought-iron bed, Maggie Pollitt, dressed in a white lace teddy, waits impatiently for her depressed, alcoholic husband to offer her a night of love, in vain. A cinematic image burning with sensuality like few others.

Claudia Cardinale in The Leopard (1963)

The film: Burt Lancaster, Alain Delon and Claudia Cardinale star in this scorching film portraying the decadent and impoverished Sicilian aristocrat of the 1860s who blindly enjoys the advantages and comfort of his class, deaf to the roaring revolution that is gradually transforming the country and replacing the old world. A breathtaking adaptation of Giuseppe Tomasi Di Lampedusa's famous novel that won the Palme d'Or at Cannes in 1963.

The dress: Embodying the femme fatale Angelica, Claudia Cardinale wears a white dress in the sumptuous ballroom scene from Visconti's film, subtly revealing her shoulders. This creation by Italian costume designer Piero Tosi, imagined in the pure style of the 19th century, included a corset so tight that the actress was wounded in the flesh.

Audrey Hepburn in My Fair Lady (1964)

The film: Audrey Hepburn shines brightly in George Cukor's famous musical as a flower seller who is snatched from anonymity by an elocution teacher (Rex Harrison). Determined to teach her refined English and to pass her off as a duchess, she submits herself to grueling lessons in phonetics. But what was just a social experiment soon turns into an unhoped-for love affair. Among the film's highlights are the delightful I Could Have Danced All Night and a scene as brilliantly choreographed as it is singularly costumed at the Ascot Racecourse.

The dress: For this cult film, Cecil Beaton composed a series of sumptuous outfits for Audrey Hepburn, accompanying the transformation of the cheeky flower merchant into a refined duchess. Among the unforgettable ones is her white Empire-style ball gown studded with pearls and crystals. The costume designer and photographer was awarded the Oscar for Best Costume Design in 1965.

Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct (1992)

The film: The erotic game of cat and mouse between a police inspector (Michael Douglas) and a promiscuous novelist (Sharon Stone), suspected of murdering a rock star.

The dress: Did somebody say cult? In the middle of an interrogation, Catherine Tramell (Sharon Stone) dressed in a tight white turtleneck mini dress, uncrosses and crosses her legs languidly. A polemic sets in and makes this one of the most erotic scenes in the history of cinema.

Alicia Silverstone in Clueless (1995)

The film: The high school superstar Cher (Alicia Silverstone) has only one obsession: finding boyfriends for her friends. A modern adaptation of Jane Austen's novel Emma in which we follow the daily lives of these rich kids from an upscale Beverly Hills neighborhood, Clueless remains one of the cult teen-movies of the 1990s which strongly inspired those of the following decade (Mean Girls comes to mind).

The dress: Among Cher's looks, each more iconic than the next, our heart beats for her tight white mini dress with spaghetti straps made by Calvin Klein, a model typical of the 1990s.

[babbushka]

Last Straw (3/12)

Newly married to your high school sweetheart Kylo Ren, the two of you move into Skywalker Ranch, a farm recently passed down after the death of Kylo’s grandfather. The place is charming, and the people seem friendly…but are they?

Content Warnings:  NSFW content (shower sex)

                                                   ----------------

After a few seconds thought, you decide no, you want to help him. Between the two of you, you could splurge on some really expensive parts since you wouldn’t have to worry about paying anyone for labor. And the way Kylo is looking at you, standing there shirtless and sun-kissed, well, you think if anyone was going to be around your man ogling him, it better be his newly wedded wife.

“I was thinking it might be nice if we worked on the house together.” You decide, making him absolutely light up. You take a big swig of your coffee and give him a playful wink as the birds chirp just outside the broken windows, “You know how I’ve been watching all those shows on HGTV? All the renovation ones?”

“Okay but you’re not actually an electrician or a plumber or anything honey.” Kylo snorts into his own mug, and you bite your lip in a chastised grin, reach out your foot and nudge him gently.

“Maybe not, but I can use power tools and I know how to follow instructions like nobody’s business.” You point out, and he does raise his mug in acknowledgment to that with a chuckle.

“Touché.” He says, and you just love him so much, you put the mug down and get up from the small rickety table to get all in his business, press yourself clad in only your robe, up against him.

“I figured you could direct me, Mr. Handyman, and whatever I can’t figure out myself, well, we always have YouTube.” You say, an attempt at being seductive, your lids lowered, and your mouth pouted.

It works, and he sets his mug down on the table hard, wraps his arms around you. His skin is warmed and already a little sweaty from the work he was doing in the kitchen, just some simple tidying up with the broom and a duster. He kisses you, licks into your mouth nice and slow, wet, hungry. He tastes like the roasted coffee beans he always buys, some locally grown brand from the big city that he’s now going to have to give up, living all the way out here in the farmlands.

But he doesn’t care, not if the way he’s holding onto you is any indication, doesn’t care about the coffee, only being here with you.

“You really want to work on the house with me?” He asks, eyes dark and brimming with nervous thoughts.

You know what he’s asking, what he really means.

You really want to live here with me?

He doesn’t need to say it, but he doesn’t need to. You’ve been through enough together, enough shared trauma that you can read him all too well, the best out of anyone. And the unasked question in his smoldering eyes breaks your heart, because how could you not? With all he’s done for you – all you’ve done for one another. How much you love one another.

“Of course I do.” You reply, answering both the spoken and unspoken, answering every doubt he could have had. “This house means the world to you, I know that. If I can do my part to restore it to its former glory, then I will.” You mean it, mean every word, always.

He nods, gives your hand a tight squeeze, kisses you. You kiss him back, right on the edge where the scar on his face is gnarled and brutal, feather light kisses letting him know everything is alright.

“I don’t know how I got so lucky, just, considering everything.” He says, and you sigh.

“Ky, there isn’t anyone I’d rather be with. I know it’s hard, I know it is. But we’re going to get through it together.” You reassure him, “And when it’s all said and done, and the house is put back together, we’re going to go out and get some cattle, maybe some sheep, and I’m going to make us homemade cheese just like Padme used to.” You grin.

He smiles at that, at the memory of the gentle baa-ing of Padme’s flock, the memory of frozen sheep’s milk accompanied by fresh strawberries. You raise your eyebrows in a comforting manner, as if to ask if that’s alright, if he’s alright. He’s not, but he’s trying, you know by the way he nods, and the attempt is worth more than you can say.

“I think our first trip should be to go into town and get stuff to fix the shower.” Kylo says eventually, breaking the heavy seriousness of the moment by catching a whiff of his underarms and making a face, scrunching up his nose. “The water’s been turned back on and the electric works, but that shower…”

“Alright alright, good thing we have deodorant.” You laugh, playfully swatting at his chest as you wrangle yourself out of his grasp.

It takes almost forty-minutes to get all the way into town, into town properly anyway. About half an hour into the drive there are houses that spring up, scattered about. Nothing that could really be called a suburb, not the way you think of it anyway. But ten minutes more and suddenly you’re driving down Main Street, a bustling road filled with people walking, biking, driving.

It’s just the one road, but it’s got all the sorts of stores you might want, anything you might need. There’s a grocery, a pharmacy, the library. A couple store-fronts selling clothes, home goods. There are restaurants, bars, but none of them, nothing on the street is a chain. Everything is mom-and-pop, established signs and plaques boasting over one hundred years of operation.

“You know, I’ve always wanted to live in a place like this? It was always my dream, getting out of the city, out into nature. I love how wide open everything is.” You say, the sun-bleached pavement smooth under the tires of the truck.

“Good, because we’ve got just about nothing but nature.” Kylo replies, as he parks the car in front of the home supply store.

It’s surprisingly modern inside, with all the latest gadgets that one might need when doing any sort of renovations. There are aisles and aisles of all sorts of things, plumping, wood paneling, bolts and nuts and screws, and all the power cordless tools to go along with them. An old woman turns to greet you both when the ding of the doorbell sounds, and she nearly drops her armful of foam insulation tube at the sight of Kylo.

“Bless my soul if it isn’t Benjamin! Benny boy how are ya?” She hurriedly puts everything down, rushes over and scoops Kylo’s six-foot-three frame into her arms, giving him a tight squeeze while his face goes beet red.

“Mrs. Carlton I go by Kylo now, and this is my wife, (Y/N).” He explains, and she nods in understanding, gives a cheeky wink.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you.” You say, holding your hand out for a shake, but she just leans in for a big embrace as well.

You of course oblige, and are surprised to see that while she may look frail, she’s got something of a good grip when she hugs you tight.

“Oh ain’t she a beaut! You got yourself mighty lucky with this one Benny – now don’t tell me, you’re here on account of the ol’ farmhouse needing repairs, ain’t that right?” Mrs. Carlton asks, a wistful look in her eye.

“How’d you know that?” Kylo asks in return, and the woman just tsks out a laugh.

“Oh folks talk, believe me. When I heard that state agents were snoopin’ around your granddaddy’s farm you can believe me and the guys went out to tell ‘em what for. We thought they were trespassing, but then they told us about ol’ Anakin.” She says, her voice going soft towards the end.

You look at Kylo, and Kylo looks at his feet, trying not to get worked up or emotional out in public. Being home in your arms was one thing, being in the middle of the doorknob aisle was another.

“Yeah.” Is all he says, voice thick.

Mrs. Carlton releases you from her hug, and you move over to Kylo’s side, wrapping your arm around his, comforting him.

“I’m real sorry to hear that sonny, real sorry. He loved you very much; you ought to know, any time you’d come over for the summers it’d be all he could talk about.” Mrs. Carlton says gently, and that make’s Kylo’s head snap up, eyes wide.

“Really?” He asks, and your heart breaks all over. All over again, for the way he looks so young, the way he looks like he did back before…well…everything.

“Really.” She nods, and for a moment you think she might cry too, but then she’s walking away, towards the register, the insulation tubing all but forgotten. “Now listen, I know that house has seen better days, so let me tell you what. Anything you need, you ain’t paying full price for it. I’d offer a hand myself to help but I’m afraid the last time I climbed up a ladder was the last time I climbed up anything.” She chuckles on her way across the store, making you frown.

“No, Mrs. Carlton please we are more than able to pay for everything, really.” You insist, not wanting to take any advantage, least of all of an old lady.

“Sweetheart I’m sure you can, but I won’t accept it. Angel!” Mrs. Carlton calls, calls again until a younger woman, probably around your age if a little younger, comes out from the back where she was no doubt on break, “Angel honey, could you please help Kylo and (Y/N) find everything they’re lookin’ for? She’ll take real good care of you.” Mrs. Carlton winks at Kylo, who only blushes all over again.

Angel leads Kylo down an aisle after taking a look at the list he had written up before leaving for town. You’re about to follow them, when you stop and take one more look at the kind old woman who was now busying herself behind the counter.

“Thank you, Mrs. Carlton.” You say sincerely, for the warm welcome, for the kind words, and for the understanding.

She only waves it off, but her eyes are wet when she regards you.

“You both are so young.” She says, and you nod, “Too young to be dealin’ with such heartache. But heartache hits us all, it doesn’t care how old we are, how prepared we are. Love is blind, but death is deaf.” She sighs, and you hum, mull that over.

You begin to walk away, when suddenly she asks with great urgency,

“Can I ask a favor?”

You stop in your tracks and rush back to the counter, eager to help her with anything. She takes your hand in between her own, spotted and wrinkled but soft nonetheless.

“Of course!” You say, because of course.

“If you happen to come across Padme’s old recipe book in that there kitchen, would you make me a sour cherry pie?” She asks, and you break out into a big smile, nod happily.

“Mrs. Carlton I’ll make you a pie every Sunday, if you’d like.” You tell her and she lets you go with a big laugh so that you can join your husband on his quest for two inch pipe.

You both get to work right away, when you’re back home. You smile at that, at the thought of how easy it was to call this place home. You’d not even been there a week, and yet you’re already thinking of how the dishes could go here, the dvd collection could go there. You’re envisioning where to put the vases on which tables in which rooms, where to hang the artwork and the family photos.

You don’t get very far, not the first day. Only the bathroom and the kitchen are dealt with, getting the plumbing cleaned and clear for the toilet and the shower, getting the sinks hooked up, the floors mopped and swept, counters dusted and polished. The fridge in the kitchen works, and you spend an entire hour cleaning it out, wiping it down, making it fit to put the drinks and snacks you’ve stashed in your cooler in the bed of the truck.

It’s dark by the time it’s all finished, the sun having gone down long ago. If you had to guess, it was probably ten o’clock at night. But the electricity worked, so you flipped the light switches on, illuminated the space with the soft golden glow of old bulbs that would absolutely need replacing, lest they burst from years of disuse.

“Shower with me.” Kylo says when you meet him at the top of the stairs, careful to avoid the ones that creak and groan. That’d be a project for another day, you think, replacing the wood there.

But for now, you’re more than eager to shower off the muck and grime and sweat of the day.

Kylo had done a damn good job on the bathroom, the tile all scrubbed and bleached, new shower-head and curtains, even picked up a soft bath-mat to catch the water when you stepped out after you were both clean.

You admire the job he did, but also him, his body, the wat the water runs in rivulets down his sculpted chest and arms, his broad back, those thick thighs.

“Careful sweetheart,” He says, voice low, “You keep looking at me like that and I’m going to have to fuck you.” He says it like that’d be a punishment, like it’d be a bad thing, like you’re not eager, desperate for it.

In response you tug him forward to meet his lips in a searing kiss, opened mouth and hot, hotter than the water which steams up the mirror just outside the shower. It takes so little to get him groaning into your mouth for you, takes so little to get him to pant and his hands to twitch as they reach for you – but they’re reaching for you now, and you let him grope and grab and bruise you under the hot spray, as soapy foam slides down your skin, washing away the stress of the day.

He’s hard for you, turns you around and presses your chest to the cold tile where the water doesn’t hit, as he settles behind you. You brace yourself against the wall to get some purchase, some leverage, as you press your hips back, encouraging him as he slides the head of his cock through your folds.

“Oh,” You sigh happily, suck in a sharp breath when he nudges it further and further into you, hips moving moving moving back and forth to rock all the way into you.

He buries his face in the crook of your shoulder, laves his tongue over your pulse as he fucks you steadily, building up momentum and speed. You have to be careful, in the shower, the two of you have absolutely slipped before, and it would be bad luck to get hurt now, on the first fuck in the new house. New home.

He grunts in your ear as he moves faster, really begins to find a good rhythm that has his flesh smacking against yours, has you moaning loud, echoing, bouncing off the walls of the bathroom, fighting the rush of the shower spray.

His cock feels so good inside you, and his hand slips around your throat to squeeze tightly there, to cut off your air flow just enough to make you deliciously dizzy.

Between your panting and his groaning, you almost miss it – the noise.

But there it is again, something foreign, not from your bodies, not from the bathroom. Your eyes fly open and you tense up immediately.

“What was that?” You ask, voice a whisper, and Kylo stops as soon as he notices you’re no longer in the throes of passion.

“What was what?” Kylo asks, immediately shutting off the water, ears trained, trying to listen.

The sound happens again, and you both look at one another, both naked and vulnerable.  

“That!” You hiss, scrabbling for a towel, “There’s someone at the door.”

“Are you fucking kidding?” Kylo groans, scrubs a hand over his face and gets out of the shower, quickly grabs a towel for himself and wipes down, throwing on his robe that he had pulled out from the suitcase. “Baby stay here, I’m going to see what’s going on.”

“Don’t!” You squeak, towel wrapped around your body, hugging it close, eyes wide. Your heart is racing, and you can’t explain it, can’t explain the sudden anxiety you feel.

“Why not?” Kylo asks, already sticking his big feet into slippers, already combing his fingers through his sopping wet hair.

“I don’t like it, it’s the dead of night what if – ” You start to worry, chew your lip.

Kylo put his hands on your arms to calm and comfort you.

“If it’s the dead of night and they’re knocking politely on our door, they must be in trouble. Folks around here help one another, this isn’t the city where everyone’s out to get you.” He says with a bit of a chuckle.

“Please?” You ask anyway, hoping that maybe if you just ignore them, they’ll leave.

“I’m just going to see if everything is okay, I won’t let them in, I promise.” Kylo shakes his head, those good boy instincts coming through too strong.

“I’m coming with you.” You decide, pulling on your robe too.

Standing on the porch in nothing but the light of the moon are three men; one much older, and two younger ones who look to be identical twins. The twins are boys really, just barely getting through puberty from the looks of it. They’re clearly family, sharing the same crop of red hair and sprinkling of freckles, and when Kylo opens the door they all give you the same smile.

It’s a slightly disconcerting smile, particularly on one of the twins, who looks like he isn’t used to the gesture, like it hurts his face almost.

“Good evening sir, ma’am, we’re so sorry to bother you at this time of night.” The eldest, maybe their father, says. “My name is Brendol Hux, and these are my sons, Armitage and William.” The man, Brendol, has an accent, something thick and heavy but not one you can really place.

“How can we help you?” Kylo asks, shaking the man’s hand, shaking it still even when he won’t let go. When it’s awkward. When the shake has gone on for too long.

“Our car broke down about a mile up the road.” Brendol says, still shaking Kylo’s hand, nails starting to dig in too tight.

Kylo rips his hand out of the man’s grip, and you try your best, your very best not to notice, not to scream.

“Shit, I’m sorry, engine trouble?” Kylo wonders, but the younger looking boy, the one with the long red hair, William, shakes his head.

“No we think we, we think we accidentally hit some nails, our tires busted.” The boy stammers, eyes big and blue and watery. They’re so light that they’re almost see-through. They look sad, you think.

“I’m afraid we can’t help you, we don’t have any spare tires.” You say, already ready to close the door on them, when Brendol laughs.

“Oh no! No that’s not why we’re here,” He says, making you and Kylo both frown, “We were hoping you might let us spend the evening in your barn, just until sunrise when we can flag down a tow-truck or someone who might have a spare.”

“I can call a tow-truck for you.” You announced happily, glad to be able to help and get them off of your property. You had already connected the phone lines that afternoon, so it wouldn’t be any issue, not for local numbers anyway.

“No!” William says far too loudly, too panicked, and Kylo frowns.

“No?” He asks, voice deep, shoulders square.

Armitage and Brendol both shoot William a look, one that makes you wonder if maybe you should call Child Protective Services instead.

“What my son means, is that there’s no one awake right now, no one would answer.” Brendol says easily, smiling politely, smiling in that way that makes you break out into goosebumps, because you feel like you’ve seen that face before, but you can’t place where, or why.

You and Kylo look at one another, and you silently debate what to do.

They looked to be genuinely in distress, and Kylo was right, people helped one another around here. You felt awful about the thought of leaving them to fuck off into the night. They had clearly come to you for help, must have seen the lights on and thought this was their only option, or else they wouldn’t have shown up. If you agree to let them stay, it wouldn’t even be inside the house. They asked to sleep in the barn, which is a good many yards away. It’s not like anyone else was sleeping in there, you reasoned.

On the other hand, you didn’t like the idea of strangers on your property. The phone lines worked, and maybe you could call the police or something too while you were at it. You don’t like the way poor William cowers in fear of his brother, his father. You want to hug him close, but at the same time you want them all to go very very far away.

What will you do?

(If you agree to let them stay, click here) (If you decide to call the tow-truck anyway, click here)

[weepingvoidpenguin]

I’ll Help You

PART 1

Summary: Carlton Drake has officially crossed the line in terms of morale and humanity. He’s threatened your boss, Dr. Skirth, to manipulate her into staying with the project just as he’s manipulated all the victims he’s putting at risk to further his own twisted research. And once you witness a man die right in front of you because of it, you couldn’t continue on. Shamefully enough, you’re too scared to leave, you know how Carlton is and it terrifies you to no end so when Dr. Skirth comes up with the idea to involve an ex investigative journalist, your desperation gets the better of you and you agree to tag him along. You find yourself spending more and more time with him until it seems like you can’t pry yourself away and he grows increasingly protective of you when you vulnerably express your fears to him.

Warnings: None . . . yet

Word Count: 2,446

  You looked to your left at Dr. Skirth and smiled as the yellow symbiote merged successfully with the rabbit. It’d been months with failure after failure but not for nothing. You learned from each failure and changed according to that. 

   Dr. Skirth lit up as she observed the white creature in the box in front of her. You knew this project was a team effort but you were biased so all your pride centered around her. You were there alongside her when she trudged through the nights at the lab trying to make progress in the beginning. You’d ran to go get her coffee or ice water, whichever she was in the mood for at the time. On multiple occasions you’ve woken her up and pulled her from her drool drenched papers to walk her to the break room so she could rest on the couch. Then, the next morning, you showed up with two coffees in tow, one for the doctor and one for you, of course. 

   Dr. Skirth had graciously taken you under her wing months before this project came into existence. She’d needed an assistant for quite some time but never admitted it to herself, her explanation being that if she was tired then she was making progress through those late nights. But at a family party the word had gotten out that she had finally caved and was taking applications for the position. Now, you knew hardly anything about science excluding the little you retained in high school and whatever you managed to get through in college, but once you offered your help, she brought you onto the team anyway. You were beyond grateful. Although science wasn’t necessarily the way you thought your life would be heading, you figured as long as you could learn something new and enjoy yourself while doing it, there was no harm in leaping into that career field. It took a few months before you could actually assist on any physical labs but while you were getting her coffee and inserting her notes into a hard drive, you’d managed to teach yourself equations and terminology that went along with her field of work. She never held you back when she was certain you could advance and for that you thanked whatever gods were listening that your cousin married her because although your job description was to help her, she had really helped you in more ways than you could recall. 

   So, yeah. You were pretty proud of this intelligent woman standing on your left. But your cheery attitude dispersed quickly at Carlton’s words, “It’s too soon,” you cut him off, knowing exactly where he was going with his orders.

   Carlton raised an eyebrow at you, his mouth hanging half open. It wasn’t a secret that Drake loathed you for some reason. Practically from the first day you arrived he’d had it out for you, he tried to demean you in front of anyone who was unfortunate enough to be present and when you would simply turn away from his childish behavior, he tried to continue and crawl his way under your skin.

   Now, you didn’t necessarily think Carlton Drake was a bad guy, up until recently, that is. The way he spoke to children was always kind and genuine, he would never inhibit great potential and he appreciated intelligence like no other (you know, since it benefitted him) but after his most recent scandal with getting a man fired who had been prodding his nose deep into things that should’ve stayed buried and trying to wipe his hands clean of the deaths that he was responsible for, you’d changed your mind on what you thought of him.

   “We’re not ready for human testing yet, it’d be unethical-” Dora tried to explain but you both knew her logic would fall on greedy, deaf ears. 

   You opened your mouth to back her up, already bursting with anger at his arrogant demands but once he’d mentioned Skirth’s children, your jaw shut hard enough to make you look into a mirror later and check for cracked teeth. 

   “How are your children by the way?” He asked, obviously not giving a damn how they were and trying to get his underlying meaning across.

   Your jaw clenched and your throat tightened with fury. How dare this arrogant, greed-driven businessman threaten your fucking family. If he weren’t so powerful you would've killed him right then and there. But then again, if he wasn’t so powerful, his words wouldn’t have instilled the fear that they did.

-

   “What a fucking psychopath!” You shouted after Dora closed the door to her office.

   The volume of your voice made her flinch and you could tell she was fighting the urge to turn around and check to see if he was coming, “Please keep your voice down, (Y/N).” she lowered her hands to motion silence and when she thought the coast was clear she sighed, “But yeah. Psychotic,” 

   She walked around the edge of her desk and sat in its waiting chair before bringing her hands up to her head and rubbing it, “You don’t have to participate in this,” she offered, catching your attention away from the overwhelming anger coursing through you. “You could leave, keep your hands clean of this . . . and your conscious,” 

   You looked down at her then, her white lab coat stained with sweat from worry and the creases in her face now deep with guilt. Would you look like that if you continued working here? For Carlton? Would your conscious weigh down on you like the sky on Atlas’ shoulders? Would it be too much for you to bear with? Would people actually die from Carlton’s orders? Would you be there to be a part of it? 

   Dora still sat there, her thin fingers trying to block the light from her eyes. She was tired and worn from her head position and if it weren't for the obvious bags under her eyes, she’d look like a defenseless puppy waiting for rescue. Or, waiting for punishment. She was preparing for the toll that continuing with his orders would take on her.

   “I’m not leaving you,” you responded without much thought. “Lord knows working for Carlton is hell in itself but possibly getting blood on your hands, that’s not something anyone can take alone,” you weren’t saying you were happy with your decision and if it had been anyone else you would’ve left them long ago when Drake’s dark side began to ascend but to leave Dora alone with this psycho? No way. Besides, it’s not like you had much of a choice, he’d threatened your family and if you left knowing what you already do, there’d be consequences. 

   “I’m sorry,” Dora whimpered, her body shaking a bit, “I never should’ve agreed to let you assist.” She shook her head in her hands and sucked in shaky breaths, “I’m so sorry,”

   “Dora,” you whispered, grabbing your chair from the nearby desk and pulling it beside her, “I’m in this with you.” You placed your hand gently on her shoulder and squeezed reassuringly, “We’ll walk through hell burnt and scathed but we’ll make it out all the same,” 

   Her ragged breathing slowly steadied and you didn’t pull away until she shifted in her seat and sat back up, wiping her tears with the back of her hand as she did so, “I sure hope so,” 

-

   You nearly threw up at the sound of his bones breaking. His bones. Isaac’s bones. This poor man who Carlton swept up off the street promising safety in return for a lethal service. He wasn’t even completely aware what he was getting himself into. You’d spoken to him briefly right before he entered the lab, he seemed kind. In a sad sort of way. Like, he’d had no other choice but to be. 

   So when Carlton barely scanned over the dead body of his volunteer and called to bring the next one out, you tried to step out of the room slyly. You were scared what Drake would do if he sensed any form of weakness coming from you so you excused yourself to go to the bathroom and left quietly.

   You shuffled to the women’s bathroom and slammed the heavy door shut behind you before locking it. You whipped around, your back clashing against the cold surface of the door and slid down, the friction bringing your shirt up ever so slightly. You grabbed the collar of your lab coat and chucked it across the room, trying to distance yourself from the growing heat. You’d already managed to sweat through your shirt in multiple places but in order to avoid suspicion from Drake you grabbed a hand towel and tried to pat yourself dry. 

   You just watched someone die. A person. Like, a real person. A human being. This wasn’t some controlled science experiment that your chemistry teacher supervised and had to give permission to move onto the next step. This was a risky and unethical and overall inhumane kind of experiment that you couldn’t go home and tell anyone about when the reality of a lost life has settled into your aching bones. 

   You couldn’t tell anybody. You couldn’t tell anyone. 

   You had to tell someone.

   -

   “Ya know, hiding in plain sight is difficult enough for one of you but with two of you, it’s even worse. A blind man could see you from miles away,”

   And that’s how we’re here right now. Dora came up with the idea to search for Eddie Brock, the man who Drake had gotten fired when he’d asked a few questions that he found just a tad bit too intrusive. 

   “Okay look,” she started when we’d been caught, although it was clear from the beginning that we’d been caught by the way he’d kept looking over his shoulder all the way up this block.

   You looked at the man with the creased forehead and plump lips. So this was the guy who wasn't scared to go up against one of the most powerful guys in the state. He looked like shit. Literally. Bags that could burden any shoulder that carried it and deep grooves that showed months of constant and deep guilt. 

   You were too busy trying to size this man up to pay attention to what Dora was telling him but when they were suddenly making a beeline towards the exit, you flashed the lady at the counter a small smile and slammed your body into the closing door. 

   The cool wind danced past your face and in through your thin coat. You shivered with the sensation and stepped to the side to follow wherever Brock was taking Dora. 

   “Who’s this?” Brock asked Dora, finally looking at you since the convenience store. 

   Your eyebrows lifted and you looked between the two, “Oh, I’m suddenly part of this conversation?” You sassily spoke and took a protective step closer to Dora.

   “This is (Y/N), she’s my assistant, she can confirm everything I’m telling you,” she hastily spoke, handing him a piece of paper with our numbers written on them, “This is how you can get into contact with us,”

   Eddie hesitantly took the crumbled paper into his hand and stared down at the sloppily scrawled phone numbers. His mouth twitched, as if uncertain and his shoulders raised a bit.

   “People are dying Mr. Brock,” I spoke up, taking note of his hesitance, “We don’t know where else to go. He’s already threatened our family and . . .” you began to trail off, rubbing your clammy hands together and looking at the lights coming from the shops on the opposite side of the street, “I think he knows I’m scared,” You admitted, remembering how Carlton looked at you once you returned from the bathroom. “He’d know it was me,” you pleaded, trying to level with the burlyish man in front of you.

   He studied you hard and for what was probably too long. His eyes scanned over your face, stopping at almost every feature you had before meeting your eyes at last. 

   “Please,” You begged again, “I’ve never seen anything like this,” you chewed back the words that dried up your tongue. You hadn’t told Dora how scared you were because she’d never forgive herself if she knew of the fear that consumed you or if she knew that every sound you heard in your house caused you to jump out of your socks in paranoia. “I’ve never been so scared for anyone before . . . these people are being manipulated with safety and security but don’t know the cost they have to pay,” you pried your gaze away from the hypnotizing lights and settled on his eyes, another thing to get hypnotized by, “Not to mention how scared I am for myself,” you whimpered.

   “(Y/N),” Dr. Skirth softly spoke, placing her hand on your shoulder, causing you to look down in shame.

   “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” you felt a trail of water trickle down your face and you fought against the urge to sniffle, “I didn’t want to leave you alone there, not with Carlton threatening your kids,” 

   You glued your sight to your shoes and how they traded your weight between each other, From this angle, you could see Eddie’s hand twitch slightly upwards towards you before his opening hand closed and lowered back down to his side. 

   Embarrassed with your vulnerability, you scurried away from the both of them back towards Dora’s car and waited for the conversation to wrap itself up. 

   Minutes later, Dora crawled into the driver’s seat of the car and sighed before turning on the ignition.

   “What’d he say?” you asked.

   She remained quiet for a second then put the car in reverse, “We’ll have to wait and see,” 

-

   The rest of the night guilt racked you and kept you from another night of, let’s be honest, unpleasant sleep. Although you truthfully were scared for yourself, you felt bad for bringing yet another victim into this business and the fact that you depended on him for some sort of false safety made you almost as gullible as Carlton’s blissfully ignorant test subjects. 

   You almost regretted getting Mr. Brock involved when your phone vibrated in your hand. You pulled your gaze from the ceiling and looked at the unknown number sprawled across the screen.

   You slowly brought the phone up to your ear after answering the call and let out a chest achingly slow breath, “Hello?” 

   “It’s Eddie, um, Eddie Brock,” he sounded uncertain, like he wasn’t sure why he called you, “Listen . . . I’ll help,” 

[haninabaninah-learning]

Musical Instruments: Adult Learning Experience

A lot of people we know who play instruments Started learning them at a very early age. Many of those who end up going to music schools learn at age 5 or 6. Mozart composed his first piece at age 5 for goodness sake! I’ve been watching TwoSet Violin and prodigies are just getting younger and younger.

I had a different experience. I started seriously learning instruments in high school.

PIANO

In my younger years, I knew how to play the really easy melodies on the piano (given that we have a piano at home and my dad and grandmother are very good pianists) - Happy Birthday song, Twinkle Twinkle Little Stars - the kind you teach 4 year olds with only one hand. Then for some reason, maybe during my first years of high school, I found myself trying to learn pieces from our electronic keyboard by following the lighted keys. I first learned Canon in D and Minuet in G. My parents were a bit shocked when they saw that I learned it from the keyboard.

***To be fair, I came from quite a musical family. As I mentioned, my grandmother and father are good pianists. My mother also knows a few classical piano pieces. My father and my brother play the guitar. My sisters sang at a choir. My dad, who is also knowledgeable in music theory, is the worship leader at our local church. Basically, nobody is tone deaf in my family. You can consider our family musical.***

From there, I started going to Youtube for song tutorials. I learned A Thousand Miles and White Houses, both by Vanessa Carlton. I learned a few other pop songs, but I don’t remember them as well as these two. I never liked reading notes, so YouTube was definitely my go-to. (Thank God for YouTube.)

I first formally took lessons (Suzuki Method) the summer before my 3rd year of high school. At first, I was intimidated because two of my classmates were very good sightreaders and they were already very good at our age. But they also became inspirations for me, that soon, I will be able to play as well as them. I loved the piano, so I practiced a lot, even at night. I finished Suzuki Book 1 upto the first 2 or 3 pieces in Book 2 that summer break. But school started again and I just didn’t go back to taking those lessons.

The more I listened to piano pieces, the more I wanted to learn and be an excellent piano player. Sadly, the excitement isn’t constant. My practice and learning jumps are often characterized by energy bursts - intense practice seasons (a few weeks) and a long hiatus (months or years). I always play on and off. But it’s always good to be reminded.

I took piano lessons in the UPCMEP after about 4 years, in the summer after my second year in uni. I was discouraged from continuing though, because my teacher was very harsh and hostile. I was totally scared of her! After graduating from uni (after about 3 years), I practiced on my own again and self-studied the rest of Suzuki Book 2 and the first few pieces of Book 3. I was fired up! I took lessons with UPCMEP again under a different teacher. She’s very kind and I love her! (Ms. Pia) Unfortunately, I had to move to Australia right after finishing the sessions. (I couldn’t even attend my own recital.) I just got back from Australia, after 2 years, and I took lessons from UPCMEP - and again under a different teacher because Ms. Pia is fully booked. She’s also a nice teacher, but I made a lot of mistakes. It felt a little bit stressful because I had other things to do, and I just felt there was a lot of homework. I think my skills weren’t at par with the expectations my teacher had. I couldn’t keep up. I was always tense during my lessons for fear of making more mistakes, which made my mind go even slower. Practice was also not fun (because of the pressure of learning many pieces/ exercises at once.) 

Now, I’m on lockdown and I can’t take the online piano lessons. I tried practicing my piece again with 0 pressure on myself, and I absolutely love it!

I might take piano lessons again, someday, when I can.

Ease of learning: 3/5

Lessons: Idk the local Teacher (Suzuki), UP College of Music Extension Program

Favorite pieces: Sonatina Op. 55 No. 2 (Kuhlau), 214 Intro (Hehe classic I love Rico Blanco)

VIOLIN

I took violin lessons during my first year of working. Aside from violin being a cool instrument that makes pop music sound grand, here is another weird reason for trying to learn violin: I liked playing melodies by ear, but I can't do it with chords. It doesn't work well on the piano, because playing single notes on it sounds very child-like. But it works on the violin. Simple tunes sound really good if you have the skill. I thought if I could get to a good level of violin skills, I could play any song I want and make it sound amazing. It would be a great addition to a band arrangement or something.

I must say - with piano it's easy to sound good as a beginner but it's hard to be an expert. With violin, however, a beginner sounds like crap. I sounded like crap (imo), most especially when I first learned with the group classes. I believe I still do.

Yes, at first I took violin lessons with a class my dad found online. I would not recommend it at all. Form and technique is very important when you are starting to learn violin, and the lack of focus on the student will be of 0 help to you. We played poor-sounding violin renditions of pop songs and Christmas songs for our recital. It's kinda sad. To be fair my classmates were all in high school and below. I was in my fourth year of uni.

After two years, I started working and I picked up the violin again (for some reason.) I started earning money and I can now (kind of) afford violin lessons. I would definitely recommend individual lessons with a teacher for violin (or I guess for learning any sort of classical instrument seriously.) I learned a lot from my teacher who was also very kind and encouraging.

Unfortunately, due to many reasons including my demands at work, my tiredness of the commute to the lesson, my innate stingyness (I still found the weekly lessons very expensive, considering my income), my spiritual issues, and my depression, it just became harder and harder for me to attend lessons. A big part of the misfortune here is that I was not being honest with my teacher about my issues, and I feel like I disrespected him along the way. :(

Someday, I would want to pick up my violin again and learn. (Or get a better quality violin, actually.) I will play that vibrato well, and enjoy beautiful songs on this instrument.

Ease of learning: 1/5

Lessons: Individual Teacher

YouTube inspo: TwoSet violin (LOL), Ray Chen, Hilary Hahn (the whole gang)

Favorite piece: I really don’t remember any of my classical pieces cause I wasn’t good enough

UKULELE

Everybody I know who plays ukulele learned it as an adult. It’s very easy to play but it’s very fun-sounding. 

I remember trying to play it many years ago when we got a cheap version, but that time, I just did not put any effort. I was a busy bee and had many other things to do. I was more 100% more interested in learning piano. On top of that, I had not yet discovered the magic of actual YouTube teachers. (I don’t know if there were uke teachers at that time already.) I basically forgot about its existence after a few weeks.

I think it was when we cleaned up that I saw our Ukulele again. At 24 years old, I was going to move to Australia - and I had to bring an instrument! I can’t bring a piano or a guitar because...how. I knew I was gonna go crazy if I can’t play music, especially if there’s nothing to do while I job-hunt. I liked singing and I really wanted to learn an instrument that could accompany my singing. I ordered a quality ukulele and moved. Being jobless in a foreign country with very little money, watching Youtube teachers and practicing was really a good way to spend my time when I’m not busy. I learned reading tabs in the process too.

I have loved the sound of fingerpicked instruments for the longest time, and I was so glad to finally be able to fingerpick songs.I am also proud of being able to “chuck”. It just adds so much dimension to the music. I still have a lot to work on (I am still horrible at strumming patterns because I suck at following beats), but I’d say I’m a fair player.

Ease of learning: 5/5

YouTube Teacher: Cynthia Lin Music

Favorite pieces - I only love fingerpicked songs lol so I love Cynthia Lin: Can’t Help Falling In Love, Here Comes The Sun, Canon in D (Pachelbel - but in key of C, lol, I haven’t finished)

CLASSICAL GUITAR

Here I am, at 26, learning classical guitar and music theory. I’ve always wanted to learn the guitar. As I mentioned, I love the sound of fingerpicked instruments. I love the sound of acoustic covers and the plucked strings. It’s so relaxing and calm.

I tried learning the guitar as a high school student, but I was overcome by my annoyance of the pain on my fingertips when I press on the strings. I was also bad at strumming patterns. (I suck at rhythm.) On top of that, I gave myself an excuse of not being able to reach most chords due to my small hands. I learned the easy chords and strumming, but it really is far from good enough.

Learning the ukulele gave me courage to start learning the guitar again. I really did want to be good at it. Luckily, as I applied for piano lessons, I figured it would be a waste to travel for 2 hours a day only for a 1-hour lesson. I thought it would be a good idea to take guitar lessons as well.

I initially just wanted ordinary guitar lessons, just so I can be forced to learn guitar for my pop songs. Apparently, they mostly (or only) teach classical guitar in UP (kind of obvious though). What a beautiful genre, though. This is my kind of music! I’m also very grateful for my kind and fun teacher- Sir Peter. He’s very encouraging!

Perhaps one of the factors of the success was also the implementation of online classes. It’s not so tiring to attend lessons because of the travel (unlike when I was learning violin). I love classical guitar now, and I’m continuing my lessons. I barely practiced and prepared for my classes before lockdown, but now I really enjoy each practice time I have. More on this on another blog post!

Ease of learning: 3/5

Lessons: UP College of Music Extension Program (Now online lessons)

YouTube additional learning: Brandon Acker, This is Classical Guitar

Favorite piece - (well I’m only starting so I have a very limited list) Andantino in G by Carulli, but I would like to learn Air on G String someday

MUSIC THEORY

I’ve also started to learn Music Theory (albeit still with little effort) during lockdown. From Youtube (of course). I barely finish any song I write. And I love arranging music, but I’m not very good at it. I figure Music Theory will help me a lot in this area.

[bckugo]

HEADCANONS; five years into the future

in five years, here’s where i imagine the sab characters at: bay kennish, now 26, is still living in KC. she still works at bombshell betty’s but is quickly saving up to get her own shop started––though noelle is talking about leaving bay her shop when she retires. she makes enough to not only afford her chair every week, but enough to afford a nice apartment. she’s decorated the walls with her art and family photos, and the whole thing is very modern with a grunge edge. she’s still with travis and they’re discussing getting engaged, soon (travis has bought the ring already, little to her knowledge). her portfolio grows every day as does her lifestyle. she also bought a brand new VW Thing as soon as she could (plus a Bus, which she calls the Mystery Machine without a sense of irony in her voice). daphne vasquez, also 26, is in her third year of med school, despite the fight she had to fight to get there. she still lives in the apartment above the cracked mug, though she thinks as soon as she starts her residency she’ll move into a comfortable apartment with some roommates (possibly Mingo, though they’re keeping it casual until she’s graduated and has the PhD in her hand). (He’s planning on proposing the day she graduates and is saving up for the ring). She’s killing the medical game and killing everyone’s perceptions of both women and deaf people.  regina vasquez, 56, graduated three years previous with an associates in business management; she’s running both stores in such a lucrative way that she can afford to take care of herself, Will and Eric. Eric, of course, only served two years (with the second year out on probation for good behavior), and they’re discussing either expanding the second shop or building a third. Will is seventeen and on the track to graduate high school (with honors), and, as angsty as any teenager is, he loves his parents. he’s taken to calling regina mom.  katherine kennish, 58 (but don’t remind her), is still married to John and has since been appointed dean within UMKC. she’s very proud of her job, her new novel coming out, and her second grandbaby on the way (Lily’s pregnant!). she’s hoping it’s a girl, though Toby is fighting names like “River”, “Meadow” and “Rain” (though he secretly likes Autumn and Hazel).  john kennish, 62 (and thinking he looks damn good), has started coaching for his old team, the royals; and they’re on track for the world series. he’s proud of all three of his kids and both his grandkids (who he’s trying to push “john II” on as a possible name).  toby kennish and lily summers-kennish, 27 and 29, are trying so hard to wrangle a now six-year-old carlton (which is extremely hard while eight months pregnant!). he’s energetic, sociable and into everything. he especially loves science. toby has been giving motivational speeches on disabilities (specifically down syndrome and autism, along with other developmental disabilities) support alongside his day job of running a center dedicated to providing resources for people with disabilities. his work encompasses work training, college prep and assistance, and organizing caregivers for those who need it; he often brings carlton along for the ride. lily still teaches (though toby’s trying to convince her to take maternity leave before her water breaks). carlton is very excited for his new sister, who he thinks should be named “cupcake”.  emmett bledsoe, 25, is an accomplished photojournalist. he travels the world so much and so often that he’s hard to catch, but he keeps roots in KC and often visits on holidays.  travis barnes, 26, has made amends with emmett and, as mentioned, is working on how to propose to bay (he’s so nervous that he feels like his stomach is going to drop out of his butt every time he thinks about it). as soon as john started working for the royals, he bought out travis’s contract and now he’s playing (extremely well), for them. actually, he’s their star player. not that he likes to brag (he does). 

[pinatarazorsquigglycup]

‘Member When?

Man you remember when you didn’t want real people to see what you were upset about but you still wanted to say something so you brought it to *buh buh duh duhhhh* TUMBLR. Man what a shitty thing. Just saw Wonder Woman, great film, great meaning, man everything is great. I don’t feel so great. I kinda feel like shit actually. I am listening to intense slow emo music. I’ve felt like shit the past however many days. Why? I don’t know. I have a pretty good life. I am what America wants me to be. I have a real good job and real good friends and a start to a great education and I am a white male who is straight. Go out every night and smoke weed and go out with my great friends and adventure and wow it is great. I still feel like shit. I still get panic attacks when I see too many people at the movie theater. I still get mad at things that don’t exist and still will never get mad at anything. I really wonder what is wrong with me. I literally already don’t remember where I was going. I mean I knew I would forget and maybe that is why I did. I wish I could drive away with you, my love. Who is that? Who knows? Maybe still the same girl who I know I will never be with and never expected to be with but still think maybe deep down there is something there. I have slept in the same bed as her, cuddled with her, exchanged I love you’s. Isn’t that a relationship? No, that is my best friend. So what, you love your best friend? You wanna fuck your best friend, you sick psycho? The person that gives you everything you have ever asked for, and you can’t just take that and be okay? Or maybe it is the other friend that you smoke with every night and has the best time of your life with? But then you can’t remember that night, can you? Because you get too far and you know it while it is happening. Not what I asked though. You just want to have your way with her too? She who has in the past been into you, must still be right? That is why you hang out every night and she doesn’t go with him. But maybe she just trusts you because you don’t go after her, even though you want to. Although you preach your asexuality. I don’t want sex, not my thing. As if. Even if, what, you’re gonna sit in your back seat and cuddle because you are sad and alone. Because you thought you were dating a Brazillian girl who didn’t even speak English. Man Tinder is great. Sex isn’t dating. Then again it never felt like it was about sex. It seemed like cuddling was enough. Maybe it is hormones. I just do what my brain tells me to do. It is obviously instinct. So you just wanna cuddle this girl you go on adventures with, you just want a “summer fling”. Yea whatever. Oh but that girl from the theater, that deaf one. So pretty and so strong for what she is doing. If only I could be with her. Yea it might end up like your fucking Brazillian girl. How sweet. Now you smoke cigarettes? Good for you! You’re really strong you know!? You are doing really well for yourself! Stay at work extra hours to really get the job done! Good job! And then smoke the rest of the night away to not remember what is happening and why you never quite feel right. But at work, you are distracted by those fake problems. And then you also go out to smoke and get so high it might as well be a dream! Crazy shit. I really wonder. Better! You go home after to watch fake people on the internet! Man, they do have a perfect life! You watch it so you are interacting and causing it to go, so you’re part of that perfect life! Good for you! But they are fake? Nono, you have met those people, they aren’t fake. Those are your friends. But you can’t feel them often. Wow, they are like your real friends! How riveting? Then what? Oh you pass out and go to your dreams. They aren’t real problems either. So where are your real problems? You spend 8-10 hours at work, 8 hours getting high, and the rest sleeping. Where is the real problems? Like your dependency verification sheet? Or your class issue? Wow, those still exist? I am not at school, how could they. Look at my life, I got all I need! Yea until you realize you really aren’t there. Three years of college left. Oh, but you made it through the hardest year! You had a suicidal roommate, nothing can be worse than that! Crazy shit. Things can’t possibly follow you still? They do? Pussy. Well in Wonder Woman, that pussy stopped WWII. Why can’t you do that? BECAUSE you are on Tumblr writing to no one for no reason. You hope Emily will see this and tell you something that will make it okay. If she doesn’t see, you’ll send it. Attention whore. Get over yourself. Message her, ask her if she still uses Tumblr first. See you in a sec, bud. Good job, wow you’re really getting help. Good job. Crazy shit. I mean who are you close to. Bry is the best, you tell her your problems, she tells hers. She lives 45 minutes away and you see her once a month. Brianna is great. We talk about things. She normally talks. You don’t say much. You have a perfect life compared to her, how awful to think you might have problems! You keep it in pretty well. Anyways, you’re high, why not enjoy it? Where does that leave you? Shit, you don’t know? What? Shawn? Jakob? Cara? Carlton? If only you could reach out to them. What about Nathan and Marilyn? Well, you reach to Marilyn but doesn’t really get it. Oh wow, you got Emily to ask for it, how could you say no? Manipulative bastard, bring her into this, she deserves your problems! She only dealt with your shit for how long? Oh, but she was mean to you. Yea if only I had proof or any memory of that. You only say that because you have told yourself that many times that you now believe it. Men are garbage. Only ask for something when they need it. Oh reminded of a Three Days Grace album? Go listen to the whole thing, you’ll feel better. Wow, you still have no clue what this was for. You yelled at yourself. Schizo. Well, you’ll find it. One day. Lonely bastard.

[knockedupstream]

Looks like they did remember the Carlton story line. I still feel like Daphne should have been more sensitive to the race issues on campus, especially given that she grew up in a Latina family.

I also would have liked if this show had a black deaf character. They have LGBT Deaf characters, which I am thankful for, but their Deaf community could use more diversity. A black deaf student would have been great for the arc where Carlton combined with the inner city school and could have given another perspective on the current story line. Also deaf student with another disability would have been great.

[dinafbrownil]

Grief Grew Into A Mental Health Crisis And A $21,634 Hospital Bill

Arline Feilen lost her husband to suicide in 2013. Three years later, she lost her dad to cancer. And this February, she lost her 89-year-old mom to a cascade of health problems.

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“We were like glue, and that first Mother’s Day without her was killer. It just dragged me down,” said Feilen, who is 56 and lives in suburban Chicago. “It was just loss after loss after loss, and I just crumbled.”

A few days after that painful holiday, she drank eight or nine light beers in several hours, trying to drown her pain. She sent alarming texts to her sister and friends, raising concern she might harm herself. One friend called 911, summoning an ambulance that took her to Northwestern Medicine Central DuPage Hospital.

Feilen arrived in the emergency room on a mid-May night and was moved to a shared room in the inpatient psychiatric unit the next day. In total, she spent five nights in the hospital.

Feilen underwent tests: bloodwork, an abdominal ultrasound and an electrocardiogram. She got group counseling, which her sister, Kathy McCoy, said really helped. She also started taking an antidepressant, Remeron.

When she got home, she stopped drinking beer. She kept taking the medication and got counseling. She came to view her mental health crisis as “another mountain I’ve climbed” — and reminded herself of her accomplishment by keeping her hospital bracelet in her bedroom near a candle. Her grief began to recede.

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Then the bill came.

Need Help?

If you or someone you know may be considering suicide, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 (En Español: 1-888-628-9454; Deaf and Hard of Hearing: 1-800-799-4889) or the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741741.

Patient: Arline Feilen, the widow of a veteran, is a part-time, self-employed medical transcriptionist who lives in Carol Stream, Ill. She purchased individual insurance on the open market, not through the Affordable Care Act exchange.

Total Bill: $29,894.50, including $16,480 for room and board in a semiprivate psychiatric room and $3,999 for the ER. After the hospital reduced the bill because her insurance didn’t cover mental health, she owes $21,634.55.

Service Provider: Northwestern Medicine Central DuPage Hospital, a large, acute care hospital in the Chicago suburbs. It’s part of the nonprofit academic health system Northwestern Medicine.

The total bill for Arline Feilen’s stay in the hospital was $29,894.50, including $16,480 for room and board in a semi-private psychiatric room and $3,999 for the ER. After an adjustment by the hospital because her insurance didn’t cover mental health, she owes $21,634.55.(Alyssa Schukar for KHN)

Medical Service: Feilen received inpatient care for a depressive episode, including blood draws, an ultrasound, an electrocardiogram and behavioral health treatment.

What Gives: Feilen has an “association health plan” purchased through Affiliated Workers Association. It’s called SelectCare 1, costs her $210 a month and doesn’t cover mental health.

This is one type of plan that the Obama administration curtailed but is now permitted, since the Trump administration gave the go-ahead for sales of plans previously considered inadequate coverage.

Like other association plans, it doesn’t have to include the 10 “essential health benefits” required under the federal Affordable Care Act, such as mental health and substance use disorder treatment. In plans that comply with the ACA, those benefits must be treated the same way as physical needs.

Jennifer Snow, acting national director for advocacy and public policy for the National Alliance on Mental Illness, said the type of plan Feilen has is “allowed to undermine the ACA.”

The Trump administration last year issued rules making it easier for small employers to band together to offer insurance through these plans. In March, a U.S. District Court judge sided with 11 states and the District of Columbia challenging the law, invalidating a large chunk of those rules. But association plans are still out there, and some states support broader access to them.

Sheri Boehle, an insurance agent who handles Affiliated Workers Association plans, said many people buy this type of insurance for a short period of time. For the right people, she said, it’s a great option that can protect them from the costs of catastrophic physical health problems.

Boehle said she always gives customers a brochure explaining exactly what’s covered and what’s not, and indeed, Feilen got one saying treatment for mental health care wouldn’t be covered. Feilen said that was all right with her when she bought the policy years ago because she didn’t expect to need that service.

To keep costs down while hospitalized, Feilen said, she tried to refuse treatments like the ultrasound but was told she needed it. She got no answers when she inquired how much she might pay.

“I’m asking a simple question, and there should be a simple, finite answer,” she said.

Hospitals generally charge uninsured people much more than what they charge people who have insurance. A 2017 report from the Health Care Cost Institute showed that the average negotiated price of an acute mental health admission was $9,293 for a commercially insured patient who stayed, on average, for a week. That’s less than half of Feilen’s bill.

Getting answers about the cost of care can be extremely difficult for patients, even those footing the bills without the help of insurance.

“Hospital pricing is obviously opaque,” said Ezra Golberstein, an associate professor at the University of Minnesota’s School of Public Health. “The easiest prices to get are how much to pay for parking and how much things cost at the snack bar.”

The biggest chunk of Feilen’s bill was $16,480 for four nights in a psychiatric unit room shared with another patient. Adding the night in the ER brings it up to $20,479 — the majority of the entire bill.

McCoy joked that it would have been a lot cheaper for her sister to stay at a Ritz hotel.

That’s true. According to its website, five nights in the fanciest suite at the Ritz-Carlton in downtown Chicago costs $12,895.

Arline Feilen (left) and her sister, Kathy McCoy, at their mother’s home in the Chicago suburbs. With the biggest chunk of Feilen’s bill being $16,480 for four nights in a psychiatric unit room shared with another patient, McCoy joked that it would have been cheaper to stay at the Ritz-Carlton hotel.(Alyssa Schukar for KHN)

Resolution: Without prompting, the hospital reduced Feilen’s bill by $8,968.35 because she lacked mental health coverage. This amount was already taken off the bill when she got it.

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Hospital officials provided a statement saying Northwestern Medicine offers a variety of financial assistance programs for uninsured, underinsured and insured patients. Often, they said, a social worker or community partner helps the patient navigate the process, which includes filling out an application and providing supporting information and documents.

“In this case, we have tried numerous times to connect with this patient to provide guidance and assistance,” the statement said.

Feilen said she talked to a social worker at the hospital about costs and began filling out a form for financial help, but stopped when she got to a part that asked about stocks and bonds. Although her annual income is below the poverty level ― and she likely qualifies for Medicaid ― she received a modest inheritance from her parents that she has put into a retirement plan, she said, and thought that meant she wouldn’t qualify.

When she was buying insurance years ago, Feilen said, she started to look into plans on healthcare.gov that offer subsidies to many people with low or middle-class incomes. But she said she found them confusing and gave up.

NAMI’s Snow said it’s sometimes tough for consumers to know whether a plan complies with the health care law. Plans sold outside of healthcare.gov may be labeled “Obamacare” but not have the health law’s guaranteed benefits.

“You have to be really careful you don’t accidentally buy one. They’re always cheaper,” she said. “But if it seems too good to be true, it probably is.”

To find ACA-compliant plans, which must cover mental health, Snow suggested going to healthcare.gov, the federal marketplace that covers most states. (It will direct you if your state set up its own ACA marketplace.)

Bill Of The Month Resources

Read More

The Takeaway: If you’re uninsured, you’ll generally face bigger bills than patients with health insurance because you lack the power of the insurance company to negotiate prices with the hospital. Ask whether you qualify for Medicaid or charity care. If you don’t, negotiate with the hospital anyway to try to lower your bill. Arm yourself with information about the going rate insurers pay for the care you received by consulting websites like Healthcare Bluebook or Fair Health.

When buying insurance, make sure you know what’s covered and what’s not, which can be tricky to determine for plans — many of which can be found on the internet — that don’t have to follow all the rules of the federal health law.

“On the individual market, it’s very much ‘buyer beware’ for plans that are not ACA-compliant,” Golberstein said. “With short-term or association health plans, really read the fine print.”

If Feilen could go back in time, she said she would have surely bought insurance that covered mental illness, which affects 1in 5 U.S. adults each year.

“I would definitely recommend it. You don’t know what life is gonna bring you,” she said. “I never imagined in a million years that I’d need mental health care.”

IF YOU NEED HELP If you or someone you know is thinking about suicide, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 (En Español: 1-888-628-9454; Deaf and Hard of Hearing: 1-800-799-4889), text HOME to 741741 or use the online Lifeline Chat, all available 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

NPR produced and edited the interview with Kaiser Health News’ Elisabeth Rosenthal for broadcast. Christine Herman of Illinois Public Media and Side Effects Public Media provided audio reporting.

Bill of the Month is a crowdsourced investigation by Kaiser Health News and NPR that dissects and explains medical bills. Do you have an interesting medical bill you want to share with us? Tell us about it!

from Updates By Dina https://khn.org/news/grief-grew-into-a-mental-health-crisis-and-a-21634-hospital-bill/

[creativemorningsaustin]

Amplify Austin 2019

Amplify ATX is a 24-hour fundraising campaign through I Live Here, I Give Here. We found selected charities that we’ve featured in our past events, and consolidated the list for you below.

Hurry! You only have 24 hours to participate in the campaign: from 6pm, February 28 to 6pm, March 1.

PAST SPEAKERS:

If you were moved by Paul Scott’s talk on “Survival” you can give to AIDS Services of Austin.

If you enjoyed Antonio Delgado’s talk on “Robot” you can give to Science in a Suitcase.

If you enjoyed Carlton Wilcoxson’s talk on “Moments”you can give to E4 Youth, where he sits on the board.

If you were moved by Alan Graham’s talk on “Fantasy”you can give to Community First! & it’s parent charity, Mobile Loaves & Fishes.

If you were moved by Darden Smith’s talk on “Collaborate” you can give to his organization Songwriting with: Soldiers.

If you were moved by Katie Ford’s talk on “Freedom” you can give to Truth Be Told, where she serves as Executive Director.

PAST VENUES:

These past venues have generously hosted #CMATX events and are very deserving of your contributions:

YMCA of Austin

The Thinkery

AFS Cinema

UMLAUF Sculpture Garden

ZACH Theatre

Huston-Tillotson University

Texas School for the Deaf

Livestrong

[mikemortgage]

Here’s how to fail, whether you’re a startup or a large corporation

Each year about 30,000 new consumer products hit the market; 95 per cent of these product launches fail. The stat comes from Harvard Business School professor and disruptive-innovation expert Clayton Christensen. It is both alarming and has been increasing over the years, says Steve Mast, president and chief innovation officer of Toronto-based automated market-research platform Methodify and its parent company, Delvinia.

Why? A few key reasons, he says. More than ever, customers are in control. They want options and they want them now, leaving companies to push out product faster than ever. “Companies are in hyper competition mode and there just seems to be more bad decisions being made.” He points to the growing list of tone deaf advertising campaigns from companies such as Pepsi, Nivea and Heineken as ready examples that resulted in swift consumer backlash on social media.

“In many cases, these decisions are symptoms of a lack of real understanding of culture and consumer wants inside boardrooms, largely because decision-makers are relying on research that was done at the start of the development process 12 months before. By the time that idea gets into development, the consumer changes or their thinking has changed or the original objective gets lost along the way,” Mast says. “The same thing happens with products.”

How to build your own unfair advantage against your competitors

Disruption is overrated. Four tips on how to pivot when your business is failing

Your product is a piece of sh*t: The art of seeking (and embracing) customer feedback

While some big traditional brands seem to be missing the mark, some startup consumer-product companies are hitting the target. Look no further than razor/grooming supply company Dollar Shave Club, which Unilever scooped up for US$1 billion; e-commerce men’s apparel company Bonobos, which Walmart acquired for US$310 million; and mattress startup Purple, which went public for almost US$900 million.

So what are startup brands doing that traditional brands aren’t? They are more consumer-centric, more agile, ready to pivot — and they take an iterative approach to launching products, tweaking and improving based on consumer feedback before they enter the market in a big way. “These are all best practices large brands are now trying to adopt,” Mast says.

“Lego was heading toward failure (in 2004) when it brought in a new CEO (Jorgen Vig Knudstorp), who went to customers and said, tell us what you need. It was a 180-degree turnaround from just pumping out new products, which it had been doing to that point,” Mast says. Vig Knudstorp went so far as to put creative control into the hands of hardcore fans. Lego’s turnaround has been ranked among the greatest in corporate history.

Adidas is another example of a big brand that made a fundamental mindshift to focus on the customer, Mast says. “Adidas struggled in North America, with Nike and Under Armour eating its lunch. It couldn’t seem to break out of its connection to soccer until it put its consumer insight group at the heart of the business and established ongoing feedback loops to hear from customers in real time.” The result: Adidas is cool again and revenue and market share are up. Adidas was able to tap into cultural trends that have brought the company closer to millennials, their target market. For example, the company forged designer collaborations with Stella McCartney, Kanye West and Yohji Yamamoto of Y3 designs — all designers who are connecting culturally with its customers. “Their partnership integration strategy is smart. The celebrity becomes the brand versus the brand becoming the celebrity,” Mast says. It is also adopting the same iterative approach many Silicon Valley startups employ, forgoing wide distribution in favour of smaller test releases, carefully listening and adjusting.

Bank of Montreal is doing something similar. “It has created a human-centric design group where all new products, programs and campaigns come,” Mast says. “The bank is using Methodify tools largely on new product ad testing.”

BMO is not alone. Red Bull, Harley-Davidson, Trader Joe’s, Amazon and Ritz-Carlton have all developed consumer insight groups that are central to everything they do, Mast says. Ritz-Carlton, for example, is using a number of staff touchpoints to gather information about how the customer is feeling in real time as well as direct feedback channels with the customer in the form of mobile apps. “All of this information is then presented in almost real time to managers who can relay it back to the people on the ground who can act on it,” Mast says.

Labatt, which is working with Methodify as it relaunches existing brands, runs experiential initiatives at various events. In order to get real-time feedback in context, Methodify sends people to the events and they digitally record their experience in the moment. “They are not answering 15 questions after the fact. We’ve run a number of these research studies now and they are very powerful,” Mast says.

Here he offers his best advice on how to become customer centric:

Define what it means to be customer centric in your organization, what that looks like and cascade the information down throughout the company.

Create a group focused on understanding the customer and make it a strategic partner in decision making.

Adopt more iterative processes: test, refine, repeat. Slowly build and grow new products. It’s more evolution than revolution.

“We’ve been preconditioned with the idea that leaders of great brands never listened to the customer. They just knew what they wanted,” Mast says. “That’s certainly been said about Steve Jobs, but it’s not true. He had a research group that did nothing but listen to customers.”

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[businessweekme]

The Five Places That Stole My Heart in 2017

My travel tally for 2017 went something like this: No less than 16 trips, 12 countries, 24 destinations, 57 hotels, and roughly 90,000 miles.

Many people can beat those numbers (maybe you’re one of them), but as someone who has the distinct professional pleasure of scoping out the next great vacation spots before everyone else gets there, I’m lucky to say that even my business trips were to places that left indelible impressions.

Currently closing my eyes and reliving this magic moment.

A post shared by Nikki Ekstein (@nikkiekstein) on May 31, 2017 at 1:13pm PDT

There was the Balinese-style resort with the elephant rescue center in northern Thailand—a place I’d long dreamed of visiting and writing about. There was a lightning-speed trip to Mumbai—a place I didn’t imagine I’d fall in love with but did—and hard. There was even an exhausting week spent racing around Paris with the flu, made infinitely better by the incredible staff at Rosewood’s newly-restored Hôtel de Crillon, who graciously stocked my room with get-better notes and silver tea sets piled with honey and lemon.

Every place I visited, from Puerto Rico to Zambia, was remarkable in some way, shape, or form. These are the five I still can’t shake.

  5. St. Barths

Out of office.

A post shared by Nikki Ekstein (@nikkiekstein) on Apr 26, 2017 at 3:59pm PDT

Sometimes you just need a few days to veg on the beach and recharge. But when you’re married to someone who hates laying out in the sun, planning that type of lazy, Vitamin D-centric trip can be a near impossibility. Enter St. Barths, which satisfies on barefoot beach vibes without ever feeling boring. Here, it’s more popular to rent an open-air Moke jeep and explore the island’s 14 separate beaches—our favorite was the remote, mangrove-flanked Gouveneur—than to stay holed-up in your resort. Of course, the resorts are cossetting places to return to, whether you’re watching windsurfers swoosh through the breeze from the year-old Le Barthelemy, whose rooms have Hermès bath amenities, or having a toes-in-the-sand lunch at Eden Roc.

How to do it yourself: Following the storms of 2017, St. Barths is still recovering. Some 90 percent of its hotel rooms are still offline, but that doesn’t mean you can’t go. Local villa specialist Wimco is back in action, as is the charter airline Tradewinds Airways Ltd., which gets you there sans yacht.

  4. Napa Valley

Long travel day, but so so so worth it. #roomwithaview

A post shared by Nikki Ekstein (@nikkiekstein) on Nov 10, 2017 at 3:13pm PST

Only two weeks before I was scheduled to leave for a girls’ getaway to California wine country, fires started blazing around the Silverado Trail. From her home in Oakland, my best friend could see (and smell) plumes of smoke burning a few dozen miles away. Yet, by the time we pulled into St. Helena’s new Luxury Collection hotel, Las Alcobas, the only discernible sign of what had happened were the many handmade billboards lining Highway 29, all expressing thanks to local firefighters who had kept the damage (relatively) in check.

The good vibes were impossible to ignore: Menus featured special dishes or by-the-glass wine selections benefiting the handful of wineries that had suffered damage; locals beamed to welcome visitors; even my therapist at Meadowood’s extraordinary spa was ecstatic to see her community springing back to its feet. The quick comeback was remarkable, and with tourism an important part of the local economy, feeling we were helping the cause made every indulgence worth it.

How to do it yourself: Watch the sun go down from the patio at Ashes & Diamonds, an edgy, new winery that’s taking a cue from 1950s viticulture techniques to produce funky, non-traditional bottles. Everything here breaks Napa’s tight mold, from the mid-century-designed tasting room to the late opening hours it keeps.

  3. St. Moritz

We caught an air show while taking a walk on the frozen lake. #lovethisplace

A post shared by Nikki Ekstein (@nikkiekstein) on Feb 20, 2017 at 1:31pm PST

Because I learned to ski on the East Coast and skied only there for many years, my husband would always rave to my deaf ears about skiing out West. Eventually we made it out for our first trip to Vail, and I was ruined. The granular, iced-down snow pack of our local New York mountains would never be as good again.

Fast-forward a few seasons to 2017: our first ski trip to the Alps. Everything—from the fabulously fur-coat-filled Badrutt’s Palace to the fondue huts on the mountain—ratcheted the fantasy of skiing to a whole new level. The small moments stuck most: the DJ-filled beach cabanas that provided a hilarious stopping point in the middle of a long, legendary run; couples holding hands as they walked across a beautiful frozen lake; and an impromptu performance by the Patrouille Suisse pilots, who drew hearts in the sky on our last day in town. Colorado, I love you, but you’ve officially been outdone.

How to do it yourself: The newly-remodeled Suvretta House was my favorite hotel in aesthetics and service; the only thing missing was regular shuttle service to and from the lifts. The Carlton, Kulm, and Badrutt’s Palace all have that critical perk, among more traditionally styled rooms.

  2. Myanmar

This 58 year old woman collects and carries buckets of tiny plums each morning to sell at market. They're heavy as hell (she let us try to carry her load) and sell for a total of $2, if she's lucky.

A post shared by Nikki Ekstein (@nikkiekstein) on Jan 22, 2017 at 4:16pm PST

On Jan. 21, it felt as if the entire world was marching in solidarity with the 500,000 activists who gathered with pink hats for the Women’s March in Washington. Not where I was. That day, my sister and I climbed Shwesandaw Pagoda in Bagan, a tiny town in Myanmar that’s dotted with thousands of bulbous temple stupas. At its base, we struck up a conversation with mother and daughter members of the Padaung tribe, known for the stacks of heavy golden rings that elongate their necks, as they worked on ancient-looking looms.

That encounter, and others like it, were facilitated through our excellent Asia Transpacific Journeys guides who had earned the trust of local communities over many visits and, crucially, spoke their various languages. One candid 16-year-old girl said she couldn’t wait to add more golden rings to the short stack on her neck, adding that her younger sister, who attended a mixed-heritage school, was teased for having them and felt differently. Several women at Inle Lake’s floating market marveled at the color of our skin and laughed with us as we tried some of their commonplace ingredients (such as ants!) for the first time. We asked about the Rohingya, talked about the country’s war times, and had some of the most open dialogue I’ve ever experienced far from home. Seeing this mysterious country through the eyes of its strong women—who are fiercely clinging to tradition in the face of rapid modernization—was haunting and inspiring in ways I’ll never forget.

How to do it yourself: While quality hotels are still in short supply in developing Myanmar, the Strand in Yangon is world-class by any standard. One day is all you need in the traffic-filled capital (enough to see the gleaming Shwedagon Pagoda). From there, allocate two full days apiece in Bagan and Inle Lake for a condensed tour of the country’s greatest hits.

  1. Zimbabwe and Botswana

Safari: everything you imagined it could be, times a million. #wildernesssafaris

A post shared by Nikki Ekstein (@nikkiekstein) on Jul 20, 2017 at 10:12am PDT

Don’t call this choice a cop-out: It was hard enough narrowing down my favorite trips of the year without simply putting Africa at the bottom. It’s been nearly six months since my first safari—a trip that was five years in the making—and I still can’t choose between these two spellbinding countries. Truth is, Zimbabwe and Botswana are a perfect pair, and having experienced them side by side, they put one another’s best qualities in sharp relief.

Zimbabwe, with its reputation for the world’s greatest safari guides, finally has the lodges to match. That’s no small thing: In a country with 90 percent unemployment and plenty of lingering political uncertainty, a burgeoning tourism industry has brought palpable optimism to even the remotest communities. Safaris in Hwange National Park now offer an incredible density of wildlife sightings—as good as in neighboring Botswana—with the added benefit of authentic cultural exchanges, both in nearby villages and right on the property.

Hospitality in the bush, or some sort of dream.

A post shared by Nikki Ekstein (@nikkiekstein) on Jul 24, 2017 at 6:23am PDT

If Zimbabwe feels like a diamond that’s still slightly in-the-rough, Botswana’s Okavango Delta sparkles by comparison. Here, you see the benefits a booming luxury tourism economy can create in the long run. Guides are relatively well-traveled, hold high-paying jobs, and have risen through one of the best public school systems in all of Africa. Hospitality here has been perfected to a tee—you’re not likely to find more thoughtful service anywhere on Earth. Couple it with incredible sightings of lions and leopards; canoe rides through elephant territories; and the most dramatic Technicolor sunsets the eye can see, and it’s no wonder this has become a bucket-list topper for royals and regular folks alike.

Combined, the two countries tell a powerful story about the impact and importance of tourism: When done responsibly, it can protect the earth’s most beautiful places and change lives for the better. This combination has certainly changed mine.

How to do it yourself:  I booked with Wilderness Safaris, a longtime leader for conservation and community development in Africa. There are many great operators on this wide continent, but I can’t recommend this one highly enough.

The post The Five Places That Stole My Heart in 2017 appeared first on Bloomberg Businessweek Middle East.

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[belairresident55-blog]

season 1 episode 1

Uncle Phil! Man! How are you doing? l am not your uncle Philip. My fault, man. l must have got the wrong crib. l didn't know there were so many brothers living in this neighborhood. We're doing all right, huh? You have the right house. l am Geoffrey, your uncle's butler. Okay, well, l. Cheerio and all that rot. Bring the horses round, would you? lf you will follow me l will show you to your room, Master William. Hey, man, it's cool if you just call me Will. Master William tradition dictates that a clean, unbreakable line be drawn between a family and their butler. Therefore, it is necessary for the operation of a household that you address me as Geoffrey and l, in turn, address you by your proper title: Master William. Who are you, Robo-butler, man? Come with me, Master William. Yo, G. Let me rap to you for a second. All this Master William stuff, l'm not down with that, man. Make it sound like we're back on the plantation, like: ''Massa William ! Massa William ! '' Let's come up with something better that you could call me. What would you prefer? Check this: ''His Royal Freshness. '' That's dope. Master William, walk this way. No. -Willie! -Hey, Aunt Viv! -Sweetie, hi. -How you doing? My goodness, let me look at you. Turn around. The last time we saw you, you were this funny little boy. Now look at you. My goodness, you are a man. That was the plan. lt is amazing. You certainly have grown, Will. Well, we all have. Did you enjoy the trip? The plane ride was stupid. All the way first-class-- Excuse me? -l'm saying the plane was dope-- -Excuse me? No. Stupid, dope. No, that doesn't mean what you. How would he say. The flight was really neat. Geoffrey, would you take Will to his room, and help him get settled in? -Yes, Madam. -Nice seeing you. -Master William. -You got to love this guy, right? -Did you see the way he was dressed? -What's wrong with it? -You hear that language? -We used slang when we were kids. Do you remember our first date? You took one look at me and said: ''That is a bad dress. '' You could've just said it was a good dress. l could have, if l liked it. Actually, it was a bad dress. That's stupid. Now, take it for whatever meaning you want. Now he's got you doing it. Philip, cut him some slack, please. He's my nephew. And l would just appreciate it if you would try to understand him. Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad. -Hi, sweetie pie. -Hi, Ashley. Yo, this place is huge, man. Next time l go to my room, l'm gonna take some bread crumbs. -Will, this is Ashley. -Hi. My little Scottish cousin. Pleased to make your acquaintance. l'm your humble servant. -He's cute. -l know he is. -l'm gonna take a swim before dinner. -Good luck. The pool heater's broken. -Don't you just hate it when that happens? -Yes, that is my pet peeve. -You got your own pool here? -And a tennis court, too. Yo, this is better than Love Boat. This boy gonna be maxing and relaxing. Hold on just a minute, son. We promised your mother that you're here to work hard, straighten out and learn some good old-fashioned American values. Dad, l need $300. Hilary, your cousin Will is here. Hi. Dad, l need $300. That's a lot of money, Hilary. What for? l need a new hat. -For what? -Probably her head. Okay, l'm going on the Save the Ozone celebrity bus next Saturday. lt's gonna be Bruce Willis and Demi, Rob Lowe, Emilio Estevez or Charlie Sheen, l can't remember which. We're taking the bus all over town to protest air pollution and then we're gonna motor to the beach and have a big bonfire. What? l'm not an expert or anything, but don't you think driving a big old bus around town and then having a bonfire is sort of adding to the problem of pollution? Look, if this weren't a good idea l really don't think Ally Sheedy would be involved. Hey, look who's here. Benson. -This is for you. -But l didn't get you anything. Your uncle has invited several of the partners from his law firm to dinner. At the time of the invitation, he did not realize you'd be descending upon him today. And regrettably, it was too late to cancel. Yo, are we having a party? We're gonna get stupid, right? For some of us, that will require very little effort indeed. -Miss Ashley. -That will be all, Geoffrey. That's all you had to say to get rid of him? l've been racking my brain. -This is for you. -Thank you, Ashley. This is nice. You're very talented. Well, l'm glad l'm good at something. l tried out for the school chorus today, but l didn't get in. How come? Well, when l auditioned for Mrs. Berkley l couldn't remember all the words to the song. The part l remembered was fantastic. -l'm sure it was. l bet you're def. -That's what she said. Not deaf. D-E-F. That's just slang. Means terrific, good. Thank you. You should try rapping. When you're rapping, you mess up the words and make up some new ones right there on the spot. Let's try this. l'll sing one line, you make up a line to rhyme it. -Okay. -All right. Let's see. ''You didn't get into Miss Berkley's chorus'' -l'm thinking, all right? -That's all right. We got all day. -Okay, l've got it. -Here we go. ''You didn't get into Miss Berkley's chorus'' ''l'd like to hit her in the head with Roget's Thesaurus'' ''Don't need no choir when you're a rapper'' ''Gonna hunt Miss Berkley down and zap her'' ''Got this whole town of Bel-Air buzzing'' ''Get a load of me and my rapping cousin'' Ashley, why don't you go downstairs and get ready for dinner. -Okay, Daddy. Bye, Will. -Check you later, Ash. Look who's here, Will. Who is he? lt's your cousin, Carlton. Don't you remember? When you two were little, people thought you were twins. You looked exactly alike. l guess some things never change. -How's it going there, Will? -lt's going all right. -Malcolm X. -He's sort of my hero. Well, he was a great man. l don't know if l'd call him my hero exactly. -Really? Who are your heroes? -Well, my dad. And Bryant Gumbel. He's darn good. Oh, my, yes! l see they brought your tuxedo. Tell me something, Will. Have you ever attended a formal dinner before? Other than that thing at Buckingham Palace, no. The important thing to remember is to relax, enjoy yourself and when in doubt, do whatever Carlton's doing. -You got it, man. -Okay, l'll see you at dinner. -That's a really neat tux, isn't it, Will? -Yes. lt's definitely the cat's meow. Wait till we come downstairs in those tuxes. People may not think we're twins, but l bet they'll think we're brothers. l don't think you have to worry about anybody mistaking you for a brother. Touche. This is going to be great. Your first formal dinner. And tomorrow, l'll introduce you to the gang. Maybe we'll play a set of tennis or two. Yes, this is going to be wild. -Where is he? -He's upstairs changing. Not Will. President Reagan. -You didn't? -What do you mean, l didn't? -You invited him again. -Why not? He's our neighbor. He's turned down the last 16 invitations. When are you gonna take a hint? -Maybe l should call his house. -Don't. l don't want him here. -Why not? -Because he'll bring her. Anyway, Bruce, Demi and l all feel that the ozone layer must be protected. l mean, every square foot of rain forest that's cut down brings us just one step closer to global warming. We have to learn to protect the earth. Not just for ourselves and not just for our children but for the future of all mankind. l had no idea it was such a serious problem. l really commend you for getting involved in such a good cause. Thanks. lt's my passion. -Where can l send a donation? -l don't know. Oh, my God! Philip, don't make a big thing out of it. lf this is how he feels comfortable. He's not killing anybody. Aren't you going to introduce Will? lntroduce him. Well, Steve, David, Henry. This is Will, my nephew by marriage. Will, these are my partners in the law firm of Furth, Winn and Meyer. Earth, Wind & Fire! When's your next album coming out? Will is going to go to Bel-Air Academy with Carlton. Good for you, Will. l used to fence at Bel-Air. Really? How much do you think we could get for that stereo? These hors d'oeuvres look tempting. Don't mind if l do. -How could you do that? -lt's all in the tongue. l'll show you later. There are other people at this table. You're right. Any requests? -Sweetie, would you say grace, please? -Yes, Mommy. ''Hey, there, Lord My name is Ashley Banks ''My family and friends Want to give you some thanks ''So before this dinner's All swallowed and chewed ''Thank you, God, for this stupid food'' Hey, Geoffrey, home butler. l'm glad to see you, man. lt is a special thrill for me as well. Check this out. l'm gonna be down here for a while. Why don't you hop on in the kitchen and get me some cocoa? Master William while it is my natural inclination to accede to your every demand l officially go off duty at 9:00 p. m. And if you care to look at your watch, you will note that the long hand is on 12, and the short hand is on 9. lt is 9:00, Master William. And do you know what that means? Masterpiece Theatre is on. Sir, do you require anything further of me? No, Geoffrey. Then l shall retire. Man, he took that hard. l want to talk to you. -About what? -You know. From the minute you came, you've been a one-man wrecking crew trying to tear down what's taken a lot of hard work to build up skewering everything with your flippant shenanigans! Man, l was with you up till ''skewering. '' You know what l'm talking about. You deliberately tried to embarrass me tonight and l don't get it. Your aunt and l went through a lot of trouble to bring you here. -This is the thanks we get? -l ain't asked to come. Everyone's talking about shipping me off, and dressing me up and changing me into something l don't wanna be. Nobody wants to change you. You told me yourself l got to straighten out. ''When in doubt, act as Carlton acts. '' Man, l don't wanna be like Carlton. l'm a joker. l play around. l have fun. Being a joker is what's gotten you into trouble. You may think it's cool to be on the streets when you're 17 but when you're my age, it's a waste. l can't think that far ahead. That's your problem. You can't take anything seriously. Look, man, l don't have the problem. You have the problem. l remind you of where you came from and what you used to be. l don't know, somewhere between Princeton or the office, you got soft. You forgot who you are and where you came from. You think you're so wise. Look at me when l'm talking to you. Let me tell you something, son. l grew up on the streets just like you. l encountered bigotry you could not imagine. Now, you have a nice poster of Malcolm X on your wall. l heard the brother speak. l read every word he wrote. Believe me, l know where l come from. -You actually heard Malcolm speak, man? -That's right. So before you criticize somebody, you find out what he's all about. l'll take care of you in the morning. l'm going to bed. Hold on. l can't tell my side of the story? No, you can't. l know what you're all about. Believe me, the very thought of it makes me very tired. Good night. Ladies and gentlemen, my fly girl, Ashley Banks. -Would you teach me how to dance? -Yeah. Not in here. Even l lose my rhythm in this room. Okay. -Could you do me a favor? -Sure. l seem to be missing a Walkman. So if it shows up anywhere, like, l don't know, on your head, maybe maybe you could get that to me. -Sorry. Dad won't let me get one. -How come? He says he wants to hear everything l'm listening to, to make sure it's not bad. -What record does he think is good? -He really likes the Care Bears. Ash, from time to time, your father's gonna say or do things that may seem irrational or hard for you to understand. lt's not because he's mean, or a bad guy, or that he doesn't care about you. lt's that he's from Mars, Ashley. -l gotta get washed up. -Me, too. -l'm really glad you're living here. -Thanks, Ash. You're like the big brother l never had. What are you talking about? You got. You're right. l see your point. How many bathrooms you got in this place? Four and a half. A half bath? How does that work? lt doesn't have everything a full bathroom has. You better show me a full bathroom. l don't want to take no chances. Next bathroom. Can't a person gargle in peace? Hilary, are you gonna be in there for long or is this just like a pit stop? Stop hounding me. l'm trying to take off my makeup. Now, go away. Okay, good night, Hilary. l knew it! Read more: http://www.springfieldspringfield.co.uk/view_episode_scripts.php?tv-show=the-fresh-prince-of-bel-air&episode=s01e01

[bessiemae]

Switched at Birth finale thoughts.  Long. 

First, I thought it was pretty good for a finale, especially for a shortened season.  Also, when they talked about a big reveal that would change everything, I suspected that there had been a mix up in the results, and we would find out after all this time that there was no switch.  That came from the dramatic “will change everything.”  I mean, John knowing that Bay wasn’t related to him slightly before she and Kathryn found out about the switch wasn’t exactly a massive game changer.  Heck, it only involved him and Kathryn having an argument.

Before I get to the major stuff, that was a horrible haircut on Gabe.  He looked much better with more hair. 

Okay, a few cheers for Bay’s story.  I LOVE that she chose to stay and continue her career.  I also love that they didn’t put her and Emmett back together.  I’m neutral on her and Travis.  But, I am completely anti her and Emmett. (And man, I wish other people who agree with me - and I know they exist- would post, because so far, the posts I see are all lamenting that they didn’t end up together.  Makes it lonely since I’m pumping fists and cheering.     But, I think the show positioning him in the spot he should be for her, her first love, which is meaningful and important, but doesn’t have to be be all and end all.  I also liked that they showed her on a journey to success.  Never would have predicted her asking Emmett to go with Travis.  But, I’m glad she made a decision about her career and didn’t choose to lose her momentum for a guy. 

You know, John’s whole “I can’t help you” is nice and all, -and he said the same thing to Toby way back in one of the first seasons.  But, both times, he still starts off being totally dismissive and disrespectful of what his kids chose.  And really, John is a former athlete, former car wash owner, and current athletic coach.  He can pull strings like get Travis on a ball team.  But, what possible strings could he pull for Daphne in being a doctor?  He respects Daphne’s choice because it’s more traditional, steady paycheck, you can brag to the neighbors of my daughter the doctor type thing. 

I found the whole “lets joke about how we disappointed our parents” stroll down memory lane to be a bit syrupy and slightly unrealistic.  I mean, I love how Bay and Daphne’s relationship with each other ended up.  To me, it’s one of my favorite female friendships.  But, knowing how John clearly shows favoritism to Daphne, I would have found it more realistic for Bay to be a little upset with her.  Not so much with Daphne, but with the situation.  Even telling her that she knows it’s not Daphne’s fault, but that she wished John would show some pride in her, the same way he shows Daphne.  (He never said he was proud of Bay)  And, I think it would have been a nice moment if Daphne had stuck up for Bay with John.  That’s not a criticism of Daphne as a character, just that it would have been nice, writing-wise.

As anti Bay and Emmett as I am, I always liked Daphne and Mingo, so I’m glad they’re together.  And they didn’t have multiple break ups and long periods apart.  Them getting back together doesn’t feel slapped on because it’s expected by a portion of the fandom.  (What’s that glow?  Oh, just some bridges I burned)  Her and Mingo not being together at the end would have been a believable way to go as well.  But, yeah, I like that they chose this.  And that they didn’t put her with Chris.  Talk about slapping a relationship together at the last minute.

Toby’s new passion and motivation is good and all and makes sense based on Carlton.  But, overall, it’s like they never knew what to do with Toby.  I mean, I know people change their minds as they grow (so glad Bay never strayed from wanting to be an artist) older.  But, he went from wanting to be in a band, to being a coach at Carlton (the school) to being a DJ to now wanting to advocate for people.  And all those aspects could be part of one person’s journey in real life.  But, on the show, it just felt like they threw things at Toby when they realized he didn’t have a story.

I don’t see the point of the Luca story.  It just seemed like he was there to be the guy Regina didn’t choose.  They could have had her single, and make it about her deciding whether to go on the run with Eric, but finally convincing him to turn himself in.  There was no need to throw in a last minute quickie romance just to end it.

I was never a fan of Daphne as a doctor and I think it would have been a realistic story for her to realize that she’s not cut out for it, and that she was really motivated not by medicine, but by wanting to help people and finding a different way to do that.  It seemed throughout the seasons they were heading that way.  But, I guess having Daphne not be good at something she wanted would have looked like it was because she was deaf.  And, you couldn’t pull a switcheroo in the last episode.   Even if they had done something at the start of this season, that could have been enough build up to make it work.

Mainly, I’m just glad (with a few exceptions) on where Bay ended the story.  And I’ll probably make another post going into more detail on things I read Lizzy Weiss say about the show.

[arbitrarity]

Switched at Birth - S3.E9 reactions

Just finished watching Switched at Birth S2.E9 - Uprising. I -loved- it! I think it's amazing that they entire show but for 1 scene at the start completely vocalization-free: the audience could not hear anyone talk; everything was in ASL.

Right before I watched the ep., I was actually thinking that I'd like to watch one with my sound muted. I wouldn't have to rely on my (rather poor) signing skills to watch it because they have subtitles. But I want to try reading the signs to understand the story.

Right now, I sometimes notice that the signs and the subtitles don't match 1:1. They're not identical, partly because signing ASL grammar is different from spoken-English grammar. And I'm proud when I notice. It would be great to re-watch an older episode, shutting off the subtitles and the sound, and try to just read the signing. I don't think I could do it at this point, but immersion is a great way to learn =]

Another thing I love about this episode is that the students are trying to decide on what 'percentage of deafness' they want Carlton to be, and whether or not the hearing pilot-program kids would be able to stay. And I honestly have really torn opinions about what I think would work best.

About to watch the next episode - which is the last that has been aired so far!

[kitemist]

switched at birth season 5 episode 7 / Episode 100 thoughts with spoilers

live reactions included.

Overall, worth watching. Sweet.

Before I start, I’ve seen enough previews already. What is with this girl? What are her intentions? And something lied in the process so that Angelo is permanently dead, because something supernatural cannot happen in this show, besides the flawless lipreading. Why did the switchsters and regina ever get their hopes up. Regina didn’t want any part of it.

And now with this preview, this girl never mentioned Angelo’s name. Daphne jumped to this conclusion, and this girl knew, “looked you up a while ago.” But what is there to gain from this? Daphne’s medical career has been endangered more than once. She almost got arrested. She almost became an addict, and she almost had two of her closest friends die.

Angelo is here without a question, Bay doesn’t question it but Daphne does. Even though Daphne talked to this girl first.

And now Regina doesn’t question it! This is a daydream isn’t it. And this is what definitely what Angelo would have done if that accident never happened. He would have continued his restaurant and cooking career, bonding with Daphne over it just like the night before Regina almost shot her own daughter.

We are all Daphne now. Confused as FUCK. Carlton Kennish is still a thing and Angelo is seemingly real to Daphne and Regina. No amount of previews can make up for our confusion. Of course Gilles would be here, he announced it himself in multiple previews and on instagram, much like every other actor/actress did in their own clips. But...Angelo...what the FUCK.

So Daphne just assimilates into this mental consensus that Angelo is real, because...no choice.

Officially, the entire Kennish and Vasquez family accept that Angelo is real and seamless, all conversing with him.

Angelo’s cute italian. ;v;

“I just wish you were here.”

Fuckin CALLED IT.

Why must Daphne be the traumatized one in bed? She is already gone through this before. “This is all your fault.”

And you two are gonna have sex huh. The coat worries me after Mom did that trick.

Yeahp.

How is Bay supposed to read that sign without a mirror on the ceiling.

Is this your first time having sex after you got raped? After talking with tank himself?

“Better than Emmett?” HOW FUCKING INSECURE ABOUT YOURSELF ARE YOU, TRAVIS?

“How could you ask me that?!” Yeah, fucking hell.

Also, what even led you to having sex in the first place? Were you just super horny, Bay? Like everyone who gets into a relationship is?

“Let me run it by the wife.” THE wife. pfffffff.

“To thank us?” For....what???

“God, this is strange, isn’t it?” You just made this more awkward. I already don’t like you.

“Feels kinda like a blind date.” And in this situation, we’re both dating our dad.

Okay, so they were the ones who did the donation. But did Angelo ever consent to be an organ donor? It’s the law! Or have you two broken it enough already to not care. Or was it a ruling by the majority of the remaining family? Or was it just...fuck it.

34 people? Blood saves 3 per pint. 10 pints per average person is 30 people. But that can’t be perfectly 10. 30 for blood and 4 for organs. Blood is technically an organ, but even with this, if some were more split toward blood and more than 4 organs, I still do not believe this number, but that’s just me.

Okay, she mentioned his FULL NAME. But she never directly mentioned that she got angelo’s heart. She only confirmed that she got a heart form a man who died in a car accident the same day that angelo died in a car accident.

Why am I not believing her to be Angelo’s heart’s receiver? Not only because of spoilers, but because nothing THAT GOOD can ever happen to anyone on this show. And besides the supernatural lipreading, nothing super cool or supernatural can ever happen in this show, which is supposed to be based on reality and how the deaf and hearing people interact in an audio centric world, with a side show for a race issue and for some questioning of sexuality.

I wonder if she is just telling a story of her dead parent to have bay and daphne bond with her. Her face isn’t helping. Or I just can’t read it.

“Never take anything for granted.” I still don’t believe you.

You JUST got a new heart and you already pushing it to its limits with all these crazy activities sounds horrifying to me. There’s the syncing of a new pacemaker. Or is she just not mentioning the physical therapy and getting used to things because it’s boring to hear.

New...cravings, for everything Angelo used to like. Memories are all stored in the brain. Which died permanently.

A tattoo over your chest scar. Sure your ribcage will protect you. But it’s still sensitive skin. Or artificial skin which isn’t as tough. But...really?

Daphne raises her brow because this girl already knows Regina. Or just knows the name. She did “look her up” but how much?

Daphne is as unsure as I am. But we’re thinking about different things.

“Of turning him into a christian.” Baptism does not turn you into a christian. It just makes you, in a way, live according to not your will. They just do this to babies so that they can live “the right way”. Being assimilated into a religion is of the individual’s own volition. Which Carlton doesn’t have yet!

Lily is jewish. And then there’s this christian talk. And then toby said because of the mixed wedding we can just throw it out the window? “Carlton can be both.” What.

I understand Lily. Baptism is really much deeper than appearances. Toby wants to please his mom more than his wife. And why is Toby on board with this? Nicole being religious overseas is what caused his first marriage to fall apart. And the weird question of only coming to God for something you need when Angelo died.

“I just didn’t want to impose my religion on you.” Why can’t you do the same, Toby?

Good thing you realized this.

Cellular memory. If memory is in the DNA (which i doubt, since it only contains stuff AT BIRTH, not later) and that has spread to this girl, that would make them believe in it. “Science is amazing” after all.

Cells containing a full set of genetic material is basic bio and cell construction. It’s in the nucleolus. As string, not chromosomes joined at the centromere. Why does cellular memory theory contain a fact all biologists know?

Inheriting DNA. After the commotion of whether the body would reject it or not, it would fit like a puzzle. But wouldn’t all those cells be dead, besides the ones that are holding up the structure of the organ? It makes sense to have those structure cells contain Angelo info, but the cell is specialized to just hold up the heart’s structure. If anything, this girl’s info would sort of hide Angelo info much like a dominant over a recessive gene, not slowly turn her into Angelo, which is what everyone is starting to believe right now!

Regina is so over this conversation. She wants to get way past him and Daphne wants to dive into the past again after that commotion with Iris and the BSU because...reasons and this girl coming up to her and just leading her into making a huge inductive leap. Regina is already over Angelo...wasn’t this made clear earlier when she wanted to adopt this Skylanders fanatic?

And Regina has completely solid reasoning.

“But those people have a piece of him inside of them.” Sigh. Doesn’t mean they ARE him. Why not track down EVERYONE who received a smidge of Angelo, try to combine them all together much like a human transmutation! This isn’t Inuyasha and Angelo is not the jewel!

Bay’s text message suddenly has incoming messages on the right, while her previous text conversation with Emmett was on the left.

“Forgive me yet?” why not just send a dick pic and ask her if she misses it.

Okay, she’s cute. But I don’t trust her with this.

“You wanna see?” Just turn this into a porno.

“You wanna feel it?” If you’re this frank why not make out with her on the spot? Worked for Travis.

And this does not contain a heartbeat sfx.

“That’s your dad’s heart.” Okay, you admitted it. But I’m sure this isn’t true one way or another.

Also, the heart is not directly dead center.

Also, you wouldn’t be able to feel it. You would have to use your whole palm and press gently. Not just a few fingers.

Now Bay brings up the question of fragile skin. NOW she does?!

After Bay tattoos a gang sign and does a coverup on the spot for free, she offers a job on a tattoo that may need repeating for free. How are you ever going to get that $300 to stay here?

“My car.” She is just...too casual about all this. What if you were making it up as she went along? She wasn’t making eye contact whenever she exposed some of her story.

“I know all the good parts to park so I don’t get busted or bothered.” Okay. you claim to not have cash. but this is your 3rd different outfit. Do you keep a closet in your car, and is all your money going toward tuition and gas? And this is a gangster neighborhood. Where is safe??

“You could stay with me and daphne!” Where do you have room?? Daphne and bay live together so only Regina is in the guest house and doesn’t want to meet her, which bay doesn’t know about. And not to mention toby, lily, and carlton. You are overloaded.

The way bay is talking leads me into thinking she is more bisexual than I thought, after Zarya.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MARLEE <3

Please get along just for today.

Okay thanks Travis.

Instantly bonding and the random conversation we hear is about...a guy. Ugh.

You went to prom with a high school kid over a van. really.

And it worked..

Traveling again right after you were just about settled after that China trip and timeskip.

To meet his family...really...

And knowing someone who just happens to know cheap flights. Too convenient.

So she’s staying at Daphne and bay’s place. And Daphne is not happy.

Yeah, you should have asked her first. It’s Daphne’s place too.

“She has angelo’s heart. That practically makes her family.” Why not be-family the rest of those 34 people then?

Okay, good job telling her what you were slamming your hands about. But Regina said she didn’t want to meet any of them altogether.

Daphne’s face.

Baptism is not foreign to lily, you ass. She knows what it is, she just doesn’t want it! And of course, as Mom said, “men always think they have a good reason to lie.”

you’re only liking baptism as an obligation because of tradition. not because of your beliefs. which is what lily didn’t like as someone who was jewish. come on.

I don’t trust this show’s representation of religion as much as I don’t trust its representation of deaf people.

WOW, YOU MET HER ALREADY

Daphne said it, she didn’t.

She wanted to see Daphne but then ran into Regina and stuck with her instead? Since you share names with the robot from the 100 I don’t trust you.

And why are you running away from Daphne, Regina? Daphne did nothing wrong. Just tell you.

“I just hope from now on she respects our wishes” she already violated all of them by meeting you. what other wishes?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY. <3 THANK YOU, EMMETT.

This tension is weird. And the first thing you bring up is who you two can’t be friends over: Bay. I take that back, Emmett, I still don’t like you.

What is YOUR problem, Travis, bringing up Emmett post “best sex ever”? You two need to shut up.

Sigh. Of course you can’t shut up for her birthday.

And yes, Emmett is right about Travis being a control freak. He was making SURE he was better than Emmett in Bay’s mind. And Travis was right about Bay making that decision on her own, because she KNEW that Travis would blow up around anything Emmett.

Really? In front of Marlee, you say that Travis stole her? What??

Um, yeah, you had an idea “I can’t believe we flew back home just for a misunderstanding.” travis.

But just give Marlee a break, please...

Even if Emmett is in that bad of a place, that just proves it. He DID do that tattoo thing to get back with her.

“For all we know she doesn’t even HAVE Angelo’s heart.” I am on board with this.

Reasonable to read about you, since Mom’s book is a bestseller, just like her erotic baseball novel.

Bay. Come on. And Daphne is being like Mom right now, back when the switch was realized. Regina and Daphne were complete strangers and now they’re living together.

“Because when I’m around her, I feel connected to Angelo.” Sigh. You haven’t even talked about anything that is of angelo! We walked in on you talking about some van for prom deal!

“Why don’t you?” Because...Daphne hasn’t spent that much time with her, that’s why. And we do not know enough about her.

Daphne has a good reason to believe that maybe she could be a fake, but why would she want to play them?

Regina, in this deep stage of everyone’s lives right now, isn’t this reassuring? The thought of your loved ones (angelo) watching over you?

“I think when we’re done, we’re done.” Tell that to Bemmett.

Good convo after that racist outfit thing, Regina. You’re good to talk to about these things respectively.

Daphne’s logical to make sure about this, but breaching confidentiality. After vandalism.

Okay, she is...or is she?

“You might want to do some digging into her background.” Don’t. We. All.

In my opinion, we are all in sinful bodies anyway, since it is made from the naturally anti-god earth. Nothing can erase us completely except for god’s righteousness. Which doesn’t come from baptism. But I’m not going to put it out there if any tumblr people want to chat with me about ideology.

And we are already under god’s mercy for being allowed to exist. John 3:16. Sure we have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of god (romans 3:23) but we are redeemed now.

Okay, just because you have a more “official” person doing it doesn’t make her feel any better. You have to have one of those “baptism sessions” to get her to understand it. Not necessarily convert her, but I think a more indepth discussion than with someone unsure about religion and a reverend would be better to explain this.

So Lily said she is raising him jewish, but toby wants to follow mom, even though toby said that he and lily said carlton will be anything he wants and not to raise him as anything, so....what. And why am I caring about this again?

Now she is asking about the accident. And this would only give her more cover as “standing in” for angelo because of knowing this pivotal moment. She is definitely covering herself. I don’t trust her one bit, at all.

HA! FUCKING KNEW YOU WERE LYING ABOUT SOMETHING!

HAHAHAHAHA KEEP EXPOSING HER DAPHNE! KEEP GOING!

“you don’t know anything about me!” she knows enough for you to confirm out of your dirty mouth everything daphne just said. shut up.

“Did you lie about everything?” I’m expecting a yes.

“What do you want me to say.” Yeah. Fucking knew it.

And this is Bay’s fault for making that mental connection. She just drove her into making that same inductive leap. Daphne just leapt over back again with that digging.

And bay, since this is a lie, that 3rd time never happened.

“I said what you wanted to hear.” Yeah. That’s enough for me.

I know 0 shit about jewish stuff so I’m gonna shut up about that. But settle on Carlton’s identity already!

And now you bring down syndrome up again. I thought you didn’t care about that, that you’ll be okay with him no matter what!

Daphne’s different from Toby in “lots of other ways” and you connected with her just. fine. Ex. wilke. sorta.

A vision of Angelo again.

“Everyone deserves a second chance.” Vision-Angelo, both of bay’s datemates screwed up all their chances.

“I’m grateful I got one with you.” </3

Hey, Ripley. Good to see you.

Emmett. Why can’t you talk with daphne then? You’re talking as if she doesn’t exist.

You at that spot doesn’t make you any more deserving.

Bay can’t handle to go to that spot and now she’s there.

Uh, yeah, you were lying about SOME PARTS. That still doesn’t excuse it.

You know I am actually preferring a lesbian kiss right now. This conversation is awkward.

Thank you for finally loosening up, Travis.

And Emmett is taking pictures of another tattoo application. Hopefully they’re better because he’s actually there focusing and stuff.

“She has angelo’s DNA” “That doesn’t mean anything.” FINALLY

“Then let her family celebrate.” Regina is so against this. From the start. Stop. Trying. To. Convert.

“What if I see her and I don’t feel anything?” Well you didn’t feel anything the first time, so...

“Mom. This is my family now.” And this is the current age, where religion is not that huge anymore. Don’t try to start another Luther vs Calvin.

Cultural awareness is good.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME

Coincidence, but ;v;

And they see him at the same time. Nice effect.

“I feel him. I feel his heart.” How can you tell, but ;w;

Okay, now that you have cleared yourself, I trust you now. For now.

Nice mystery around this girl Alie. Not as pleasing as the seal of approval one, but this was beautiful.