#Cobb is a cynical little shit

[ghost-bxrd]

For "your court of owls batfam" au , how would Bruce react if Cobb ever got seriously hurt to the point of maybe having to be replaced? Also how do Dick and Jason feel about Cobb? Do they get along or is it strictly professional?

MWAHAHA I GOT ONE PERSON INTERESTED IN THIS AU ALREADY! *cheers*

Okay so Talon lore is that very little can keep a Talon down permanently. They can even regrow limbs if given enough time! So that’s neat. But basically replacing Talons isn’t a practice often exercised.

I know the Court canonically tried getting rid of Cobb in the Court of Owls saga because he got defeated by Batman and they didn’t think he’d “recover from the shame of being so thoroughly deafeated”.

It therefore stands to reason that he’s aware that he’s easily replaceable (there is always more than one Talon at any given time, although stored away in cryo usually) if he doesn’t perform to the Court’s expectations. Cobb is the best, been the best, Talon for over a century (?) now, but that means nothing if he fails to fulfill his missions.

So let’s say Cobb gets heavily injured by something that shouldn’t have been much of a challenge for a Talon. Let’s say his inattention/hubris/whatever nearly gets Bruce killed—-

That would be scandalous.

For one, his injuries will take several weeks to heal. Weeks in which the Voice will be virtually defenseless without their Talon. This is unacceptable.

And Two, some regular two bit criminals should have never been able to best a Talon in such a way. It’s a disgrace to the Court.

No, no, a new Talon must take Cobb’s place now. He has become obsolete. His services have been appreciated, but, “oh, you understand dear Talon, don’t you? The weak must be culled from the flock”.

And Cobb understands. He does. He’d thought- he thought he’d have more time, though. Time to convince Bruce to let him train the boy after all, to make sure his Voice is protected even after Cobb is gone. That the Court’s machinations will not see Bruce dead before the year is done because the new Talon will not know that Bruce is the best thing to have happened to the Court in a century. They will end up killing Bruce, killing Dick— (he shouldn’t care- he doesn’t care. He doesn’t. He doesn’t. He doesn’t-)

But then Bruce storms into the labs like the onset of a hurricane, all righteous fury and indignation, Dick hot on his heels (wide eyed and still too little with not enough training to hold out against the new Talon long enough to at least escape) demanding what the fuck is going on and why his Talon isn’t back by his side yet.

And he doesn’t accept the scientists’ reasonings that Cobb has done his duty; has become “outdated”. Doesn’t accept the reassurances of the “new one” being just as good— no, better, than the previous one. Doesn’t accept that a new Talon is supposed to protect him now. (“Him or none,” Bruce says, tone colder than the permafrost of the arctic, and at his side Dick’s eyes flash with unvoiced threat. “Now get out of my way.”)

As to the relationship between Cobb and the kids, well. His and Dick’s relationship is tense at first. Cobb has no interest being anything of a family to him despite their blood relations. He only sees Dick as a potential new (and perfect) Talon that could keep Bruce safe if he himself is deemed “outdated”. He’s not happy about all the potential “going to waste” by Dick being made Bruce’s ward, being allowed to live a sort of normal life. But once Dick approaches him for some training in physical combat… well. Sorry, Cobb tried. He really did. But Dick Grayson invented charisma, and even Cobb isn’t immune. He grudgingly starts liking the kid but will deny that until he’s blue in the face. Dick ends up being the Gray Son of Gotham, the highest ranking court member after Bruce with the training of a Talon.

With Jason it’s more straight forward. At first Cobb is pissed at Bruce for taking in a “street rat” and intending to adopt him, but… well, Jason grows on him “like fungus” (a direct quote). At first Cobb doesn’t really know what to make of Jason. The kid is loud and aggressive, but shrinks away like a wilting flower at the first signs of someone raising their voice. (He’s soft, Cobb thinks. The Court will eat him alive.)

But Jason’s also got a spine of steel as he clearly demonstrates when he jumps Cobb with a knife after an unfortunate misunderstanding where he assumed Bruce was in danger of him, and that kind of loyalty at least he can work with. (The kid’s still soft inside as all get out, but he’s excellent at covering it up with violence and bravado, and his charm is that he’s honest in a way so utterly foreign to the Court that it endears him to all the trustworthy members within a few months).

Jason becomes The Heart of the Court, the morality that Bruce was starting to have trouble clinging to; keeping them all on the right path towards a better future. A better Gotham.

(Cobb absolutely loves the children as much as Bruce does. It just takes him a bit longer to get there. And Jason is his favorite sorry I don’t make the rules. COUGH.)

[sofiasweden]

Rewatching Band of Brothers-Warning for Long Post AKA Way Too Many People

* Ron Spiers is a fucking Psycho (a very hot Psycho).

* Joe Liebgott is the epitome of “Come at me, bro” (Is also very cute). ---Doesn’t know if he wants to punch Webster or jump his bones. Probably both.

* Babe Heffron is the cutest little babe ever.

* David Webster is too pretty, too idealistic and too smart for his own good. Had like two friends in Easy, and they both died.

* Roy Cobb-A Fucking asshole, that’s all it is to him really.

* George Luz-A very lovable little shit.

* Bill Guarnere-Badass with an very unfortunate nickname.

* Dick Winters-The best Ginger. This is how Gingers are supposed to act as leaders.

* Lewis Nixon-The drunk and cynical BFF: His wife did him dirty.

* Eugene Roe-So pretty, soft and caring. Called out Winters on his stupidity.

* Johnny Martin-Resting Bitch Face. You better not mix up his Starbucks order.

* Buck Compton-An all american, sweet boy whom kind of lost it but ended up okey.

* Carwood Lipton-Easy Company’s Mom, can’t do anything wrong ever.

* Joe Toye-Avoided being blown up twice. Acts like an angry German Shepard.

* Frank Perconte-Tiny but mighty.

* Bull Randleman-The best Soldier of them all, don’t fight me on this.

* Floyd Talbert- Charismatic and smart. He gets all the ladies for sure.

* Shifty Powers-What an absolute badass sweetheart.

* Harry Welsh- Funny and nice. Are so in love with his girl that it’s almost sickening. 

I apologize if i missed some relevant people, but these are the ones i remember.

[hbostolemysoul]

Band of Brothers fluff alphabet: Joe Toye

A = Attractive (What do they find attractive about the other?)

Walking into camp Toccoa had been terrifying for you, not that you would let it show. Having gone through basic training you knew better than to show your ‘girly’ emotions around the guys. That being said having every single set of eyes on you as you walked through camp was nerve-wracking. Most of the men stared at you, some whistled, but most of them left you alone.

You didn’t really have a problem with any of the men until you were out at a local bar one night enjoying your weekend pass. Cobb had seemed like an okay guy, a bit cynical and bitter at times but your interactions had been limited. He approached you, spilling some of the beer in his mug as he invaded your space. Clearly, he had overindulged, and his comments towards you went from inappropriate to near threatening as you denied his advances. Turning to leave you were yanked backward, your lower back slamming into the table behind you. At this point some of the men around you had taken notice, some looking like they wanted to step in, but also not wanting to add to the building tension. You felt your face flush, you broke Cobbs hold on his arm and he stumbled a bit.

As you turned to leave you hear Cobb sputter “Hey bitch”,

You turned on your heel and instead of throwing a punch at Cobb you were surprised to see Toye, Joe Toye if your memory serves you correct, with Cobbs collar in his fist muttering a quiet threat to Cobb to ‘leave the lady the fuck alone’. Behind Toye you could see Guarnere, Randleman, and even Lipton looking ready to back him up should the need arise.

Cobb backed down and stumbled back to his seat on the other end of the bar. Toye turned towards you, hand extended as he introduced himself. The boys ended up inviting you to their table while sitting you leaned closer to Toye,

“I appreciate the sentiment and all, but I could have handled that myself” Joe gave a gruff laugh,

“You flatter yourself too much sweetheart, I stepped in for his protection, not yours”, that got a laugh out of you. You and Joe got on pretty well after that.

B = Baby (Do they want a family? Why/Why not?)

Joe had dropped out of high school in his junior year to work in the mines to help support his family. He had been raised to put family first and should he ever get married or have kids their wellbeing would be his first priority.

After losing his leg and spending about 9 months in hospital he is at a loss as to what he can do for work. Before the war, he had worked in the mines and mills but without his right leg, those were no longer options. He wrote to you and in his own ‘tough guy’ kind of way expressed that he felt lost. He did eventually find work as a drill bit grinder at one of the mines in Reading, Pennsylvania.

When the war was over, and you had been shipped back home you decided to visit Toye. You two had always had an easy friendship, so coming to visit felt pretty natural for both of you. A one week visit extended to several, to you eventually moving into his guest bedroom, to said guest bedroom being made into an impromptu nursery.

Your pregnancy hadn’t been planned, but you and Joe took it in stride. Your friendship had always been an easy one, and when you two sat down to talk about things it became apparent that you both had been harboring ‘deeper’ feelings for each other.

You were a champ through the delivery because that child was by no means small. A hearty little thing that was a perfect mix of you and Joe, just having them in your arms made up for the 21 hours of labour you just went through, not that you would tell Joe that. Him doting on you had been kind of nice, and you were going to milk it for as long as possible.  

C = Cuddle (How do they cuddle?)

You will usually fall asleep close together, and wake up your back to Joe’s chest, his arm wrapped securely around your waist.

D = Dates (What are dates with them like?)

Joe is a pretty simple guy, beer and pizza. You also happen to like those things so you two often just order in and hang out. When his leg isn’t acting up you two sometimes go down to one of the local bars. If it’s a particularly good night Joe will even dance to a slow song or two with you.

E = Everything (You are my __ (e.g. my life, my world…))

“You are the toughest little thing I have ever met, y’know that?”

F = Feelings (When did they know they were in love?)

You and Joe had talked about ‘feelings’ and what not when you first found out you were pregnant. While you both knew you loved the other the words hadn’t been said yet. Truthfully, they hadn’t felt right until Joe saw you with a hand on your lower back, gently scolding the child within you for “kicking my damn bladder again”. Joe wasn’t a super touchy-feely guy, but for whatever reason, he just blurted the words out. It was kind of funny as you looked up at him, he blinked owlishly at you as if shocked by his own admission. You just grinned and waddled over, raising on your tip toes you place a gentle kiss to his mouth, “Love you too. Do you think we can get pizza for tonight? I really want olives”.

G = Gentle (Are they gentle? If so, how?)

Don’t get me wrong Joe can be very gentle, but that doesn’t mean you always want him to be gentle.

H = Hands (How do they like to hold hands?)

Again Joe is not super touchy-feely, but when the mood strikes him he has no problem taking your hand in his larger one.

I = Impression (What was their first impression?)

He had seen you around Toccoa, and he had heard enough about you from the men to feel familiar enough with you. Prior to the ‘Cobb’ incident, you two hadn’t really crossed paths. What he remembers clear as day was how you were definitely going to lay Cobb out on his ass if he didn’t step in. Not that the guy didn’t deserve it. After talking with you that night he realized that you were quite funny and would totally take a guy down should the mood strike you. What can he say, he liked you.

J = Jealousy (Do they get jealous?)

Joe can get jealous, it happens more now that you two are officially together than it did before. Sure while overseas he would get annoyed with the way men would look at you, flirt with you, touch you, breath in your general vicinity, but hey you were just friends so he kept his feelings in check. But now that you are together he gets to pull out that ‘back the fuck off’ look that he does so well.

K = Kiss (How do they kiss? Who initiated the first kiss?)

You honestly don’t remember. You two had been bickering about whether pineapple had a place on pizza and somehow your mouths ended up together.

L = Love (Who says ‘I love you’ first?)

Joe did. You had been standing in the kitchen muttering to your acrobat of an unborn child when Joe just blurted it out. It had been sweet, and so uniquely Joe that it was kind of hilarious. (Also you did get that pizza you asked for)

M = Memory (What’s their favourite memory together?)

The first day you came to visit after the war had been pretty great. You two didn’t realize how much you had missed each other until you were in the same room. You two had stayed up late that night, drinking beers and just catching up. Joe also ‘forced’ the photos of Guarnere’s various kids upon you. What the hell else was he going to do with all those photos anyway?

N = Nickel (Do they spoil? Do they buy the person they love everything?)

Pizza is kind of your thing. You two aren’t particularly materialistic, so it’s the simple things that keep you two happy.

O = Orange (What colour reminds them of their other half?)

Red. You are fiery, funny, and a total badass (beast in bed).  

P = Pet names (What pet names do they use?)

Sweetheart (not in a sappy way, but like totally Joe if that makes sense?!)

Q = Quaint (What is their favourite non-modern thing?)

He has an old watch that his dad gave to him. The watch face is cracked and the battery died long ago, but it came from family so it means something.  

R = Rainy Day (What do they like to do on a rainy day?)

Joe’s leg acts up when it rains, “something about the pressure systems or some shit” as he likes to say. So you two usually stay in, sometimes playing cards.

S = Sad (How do they cheer themselves/others up?)

Joe (tough guy) doesn’t get sad, his head just gets cloudy sometimes. Pizza and beer usually fix it, until baby Toye comes along. Joe likes to have ‘conversations’ with your babbling baby, it literally keeps them entertained for hours.

T = Talking (What do they like to talk about?)

Day to day life stuff mostly, “Have you seen the remote?”, “Why is our child covered in peanut butter?”, “Have you seen my watch?”. You know. Normal things.

U = Unencumbered (What helps them relax?)

Joe will never admit it, but he loves napping with the baby. He will never admit to needing the naps though, always some excuse “The kid was already asleep. Seemed like a crime to get up and disturb ‘em”.

V = Vaunt (What do they like to show off? What are they proud of?)

Again Joe isn’t very materialistic, or showy. He is just happy to have the things he does, (You, baby Toye, a reasonable distance between the Guarnere clan and your home)  

W = Wedding (When, how, where do they propose?)

The topic of marriage comes up occasionally, but you and Joe never really felt the urgency some other couples have. It wasn’t until baby Toye had tuned into ‘full on tiny human Toye’ that the conversation comes up seriously. Mostly because you kid straight up asked “Why don’t you just ask mom to marry you already?”.

You guys had a small ceremony, your families and friends came to the reception afterward. Guarnere full on cackled when he found out how you two ‘got’ engaged, he then promptly high fived your child.

X = Xylophone (What’s their song?)

Guest Room- Echos

Y = Yes (Do they ever think of getting married/proposing?)

You two had tossed the idea around, it wasn’t until your child literally scolded you that you two got your act together.

Z = Zebra (If they wanted a pet, what would they get?)

Joe had a clear dog or nothing rule. Until your child came home with this mangy cat that they were clearly in love with…It took Joe about two days to come around, but he most definitely did not fall asleep with the cat on his chest. No, that never happened.

[flauntpage]

Morning Wood: Inserting Them Into The Conversation

This site was built for days like this.

For a while now, people have complained that we’re too negative, too cynical, too… whatever. The problem is, for five years we’ve had little to celebrate. No team has won a playoff series since 2012 – when the Sixers beat a decimated Bulls team in the first round – and together they have endured a stretch that we haven’t seen in this town since the early 90s. Since then, at least one team has always made a run– the Flyers in the mid and late 90s, the Eagles in the early 2000s, and the Phillies after that. But since 2012? Nothing. Pure misery in almost all regards. Failed coaching experiments, busts, injuries, tanking, malaise, epic flameouts– you name it, we’ve had it.

Meanwhile, the world has changed around us. Social media, mobile devices, cord cutting and even fantasy sports have changed our consumption habits. The last time a Philly team was truly good (not counting Villanova because the assholes in the comments don’t like it when I do), our system of fandom had us immediately turning to Postgame Live to celebrate and regale. It had us listening to sports talk radio to feed our inner beast. And it had us turning to websites like this one to keep up with the daily deluge of masturbatory takes.

During the absence of quality local sports, regional sports networks have been turned into an unnecessary redundancy, good only for broadcasting games and not much else. Sports talk radio has given way to podcasts, which better serve die-hard fans. And we’ve been forced these last few years to shit on all the things that deserved shitting on, finding our lane only when there was a genuine controversy or to report on the palace intrigue of sports talk radio. But for those who were with us from 2010-2013, when the Flyers made their Stanley Cup run, the Phillies ran a train on the National League for two seasons, and the Eagles stormed out of nowhere during Chip Kelly’s first season, then you know when this site is at its best.

That is all a very long, and very self-serving way of saying that WE’RE FUCKING BACK. Our teams have turned the corner and hit the accelerator. It’s time to dive into the giant pool of coconut oil, rub some on our loins, and get lubricious on our ass, because we have wins to celebrate, opponents to mock, and fucking trophies to grab.

The Eagles are contenders, if not favorites. Go ahead, bask in it.

What they did yesterday to a good Denver defense was remarkable. But it’s not just the sheer volume of points they point up, it’s the efficiency with which they did it.

First of all, they only punted twice, which is stupid.

But they were downright efficient on their touchdown drives:

7 plays, 75 yards

3 plays, 15 yards

6 plays, 75 yards

4 plays, 75 yards

13 plays, 77 yards

3 plays, 11 yards

5 plays, 48 yards

Remove that one 13-play drive, and the Eagles had six touchdown drives with an average of 4.6 plays per drive. Prior to yesterday, the average plays per touchdown drive in the NFL was 7.3, with no team coming in under 5.9 plays. The Eagles were 11th in the league at 6.9 per drive. Yesterday, even if you include the 13-play drive, they were at 5.9 plays per drive. Remarkable. So much for Doug’s dink-and-dunk, tuna can offense. Howie Roseman went out and got him gamebreakers, and Pederson has played to each guy’s respective strengths, scheming up a fucking menu of effective plays to disrobe a defense and leave their nuts hanging out in the sun, which, according to Gabe Kapler, might do them some good anyway.

And the Eagles did it in a variety of ways. The run-pass option to Alshon Jeffery, the shovel pass to Corey Clement, the home run by Jay Ajayi, the deep pass to Trey Burton. Carson Wentz was downright vicious in his ability to quick-strike. He only wound up with 199 yards, but threw four touchdowns. It’s silly, really.

The most impressive thing is the plug-and-play ability. Oh, hey, is our best receiver out? No problem, we’ll put 792-year-old Brent Celek out there in the passing game and then throw a ludicrous deep ball to Trey Burton as we line him up out wide.

Did Darren Sproles go down? No problem, we’ll rely on LeGarrette Blount and Corey Clement for a few weeks and then we’ll go out and get Jay Ajay and his weird-ass partial English accent and he’ll smash a 49-yard run on one of his first carries. And then we’ll rely on Clement some more, because why the fuck not?

What Pederson is doing with the running backs feels A LOT like what Bill Belichick does with running backs– using them unpredictably and playing to each of their respective strengths. It’s a fucking box of chocolates, and you just never know what you’re going to get! Perhaps against Dallas we’ll bite into a thick load of Smallwood, or get blasted by the Jay Train running behind Johnson, or get pounded out by Blount chewing up yards behind Big V. Oops, did I just get sexual? I THINK I DID!

Wtf is this kid doing @CrossingBroad ? http://pic.twitter.com/4cnY0C8yjW

— Bro's Trust Tree (@BrosTrustTree) November 5, 2017

Let’s Wood!

  The Eagles ran out of fireworks

Apologies, we actually ran out of fireworks at @LFFStadium. #FlyEaglesFly http://pic.twitter.com/4uXjPPRSDe

— Philadelphia Eagles (@Eagles) November 5, 2017

This is my favorite thing of the day. They might want to consult with the Phillies 2008 guy– they’re gonna need more of those.

  Ajayi in the dark

Welcome to Philadelphia, Jay Ajayi https://t.co/ECXi6zekFC http://pic.twitter.com/mPfolloPaI

— The MMQB (@theMMQB) November 5, 2017

If you read these dots very carefully, they actually spell out “FUCK YOU, ADAM GASE.”

Probably.

  2004 vs. 2017

2004 Eagles vs. 2017 Eagles, through 9 games. #FlyEaglesFly http://pic.twitter.com/79qRFGi7QP

— Michael Stubel (@MichaelStubel) November 5, 2017

I love this graphic. The similarities are striking. Not identical, but close.

That Eagles defense, with Brian Dawkins, was legendary in its ability to turn the frickin ball over. The game has changed, too, so that offensive output may be even more impressive in retrospective, but they did it with a veteran-laden group whereas this team is doing it with many new faces and a second-year quarterback. That group was more or less destined for the Super Bowl. I’m not sure we’re there with this team yet… but it’s hard to argue with results.

  Demoralized

#Broncos @Derek_Wolfe95 provided Cliff Notes version of loss. #Denver7 http://pic.twitter.com/Mq9pnLRFCC

— Troy Renck (@TroyRenck) November 5, 2017

Ass kicked. Sad. Hurts.

  Rooting for each other

LeGarrette Blount ran from the sideline to the end zone to celebrate Jay Ajayi’s first TD. He was super hype. #Eagles http://pic.twitter.com/jPqLDW5nqQ

— Brandon Lee Gowton (@BrandonGowton) November 6, 2017

I thought I saw Blount in there. He wasn’t on the field. This tells you everything you need to know about Blount as a teammate.

  G Cobb

How Eagles fans are feeling this morning: "Give em some of this HERE!!!" @JOEL9ONE #Eagles #FlyEaglesFly #VictoryMonday http://pic.twitter.com/yZsfWCeo7H

— Alex Holley (@AlexHolleyFOX29) November 6, 2017

I think I just saw him have sex.

  Coots, G and Reader

Sean 1Couturier having a grand ole time at the Eagles game. http://pic.twitter.com/ODm1485b0w

— Zach Siskind (@ZachSiskind) November 5, 2017

While at the @philadelphiaeagles game we ran into @philadelphiaflyers @28cgiroux @MReader24 @sean_couturier @slaughts21 @mandog1990

A post shared by Chris & Kim McBride (@afeagle2) on Nov 5, 2017 at 1:49pm PST

A MATT READ SIGHTING!

  Embiid loves sports

#TrustTheProcess chants at Eagles game with @JoelEmbiid & Justin Anderson on big screen ✌

Joel wearing Philly vs Everybody shirt http://pic.twitter.com/4y3JcfMDFo

— John Clark NBCPhilly (@JClarkNBCS) November 5, 2017

  Four seed

Photo Credit: Bill Streicher-USA TODAY Sports

This isn’t just about the Eagles. The Sixers have arrived. They’re 5-4 and are mere possessions away from being 8-1, just like the Eagles. They, too, have a tough test coming up, with road games against the Jazz, Kings, Warriors, Clippers and Lakers, so we’ll find out more about exactly what sort of team we’re dealing with. But Ben Smmons had another triple-double and JJ Redick lit the building with his shooting in one of the more raucous affairs on Friday. Just like the Eagles, I think we can begin to call the Sixers “good” with confidence. The addition of Richaun Holmes gives them substantially more reliable depth in the middle. I have nothing else to add here, but we have two super fun teams both on the verge of taking the league by storm.

We’re back, baby.

Morning Wood: Inserting Them Into The Conversation published first on http://ift.tt/2pLTmlv