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likea-silhouette · 1 month ago

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pairing: harry styles x fem!reader

cw: angst

word count: 5.1k

summary: Harry was once the boy you loved and wanted to spend your life with. The funny thing is that addiction is something that is never predicted. What happens when you run into your ex-boyfriend years after your breakup that was due to his vices?

*based on the song Complex by Katie Gregson-MacLeod*

tagged: @imaginexxharry @wheredidmyeyesgo @georgiarose94 @secretisme4 @drewrry @fratzayn Read Part One | Read Part Two

A rush of nerves coated his entire body, and goosebumps created mini mountains on his arms and legs. A massive pit had taken refuge in his stomach, and his broad chest felt as if it were falling off a cliff.

When Harry first saw you sitting by the fire underneath several sets of string lights, he felt a surge of strong emotions rush through his body.

For the entirety of the day, he knew you had been avoiding him, even though both of you were intelligent enough to know that it would be near impossible to remain unseen to the other. Especially when you shared friendships with the very reason either of you was in attendance today.

But Harry wasn’t a fool. The moment he first saw your head perk up and your plump lips slightly fall open, he knew that you were dying to see him just as much as he was dying to see you. Your eyes. Those very eyes that were exceptional at giving away your emotions, met his and whispered all your little secrets in his ear.

As the sun continued lowering deeper and deeper beneath the outline of the trees, the warm hue of the lights began to mix with the glow of the fire, casting a variation of orange, red, and yellow tones.

This on-set darkness must’ve sent a signal to nearly all of the party-goers that were in the backyard as, one by one, they began to shuffle back inside Nadia��s home.

Eventually, Harry pried his eyes off of your unsuspecting form as he half-heartedly listened in on the conversation that was going on amongst the circle of friends. It wasn’t that he didn’t enjoy the company of the people around him, it was the fact that thoughts of you were taking over the main-and only-space in his brain at the moment. Specifically, thoughts of when, and how-on-fucking-earth he would be able to talk to you after everything. Especially being paired with the several years of silence between the two of you. However, he still made it his goal. All he wanted was to talk to you in a private space, but how could he do that without crossing any of your boundaries? He wasn’t sure what he was and wasn’t allowed to do, nor was he oblivious to the things he had put you through during yours and his courtship.

The emotional trauma was something he never let himself go a day without regretting. The last thing he would ever want to do is trigger those feelings for you again and stir a pot that was millimeters from boiling over. So, he made a little deal with himself.

Tonight, if he could somehow get your eyes back on him, and get even just a sliver of a smile out of you, then he would permit himself to, at the very least, approach you. You could maybe even speak a word or two-whatever you would allow from him.

“Harry, you good?”

Harry’s blank stare must’ve been obvious. He shook his head, his waved hair loosely following along with the movement as he turned to his friend on his left.

“Sorry mate. Zoned out a bit there I guess.” The group fell back into conversation, one that retold a past story that was both humorous and nostalgic. Once able to fully immerse himself in the conversation, Harry squinted his eyes with an amused look as he genuinely laughed as they reminisced on times in their younger years.

To be young again and experience a time before mistakes that Harry so deeply sought to take back and never let see the light of day. Once he was fully recovered and the laughs had dwindled to a soft murmur amongst the group, he found his eyes briefly wandering over in your direction again. Except this time, both of your eyes latched onto one another.

Your gaze felt like a first-degree burn cutting through the top layer of his skin. Harry always had a bad habit of fidgeting-whether that was picking at his cuticles, bouncing his knee to his own rhythm, or swiping his tongue along his bottom lip. His body always seemed to resort to the things his subconscious clung to as a safety net. This time around, Harry’s tongue peered out and lightly wet his bottom lip.

His wandering eyes had been caught by you and what does someone do when caught? Form a small, yet kind smile and nod in greeting in the person's direction as you try not to let the awkwardness seep through your facial features. That's exactly what Harry did. Your breath caught hard in your throat, you hoped Harry wasn’t able to see the lump of air you had to choke back out of surprise. Politely, you smile back, but only for a fraction of a second, hoping that would suffice enough to blanket over how much that simple acknowledgment was affecting you. You allowed your gaze to linger on Harry's for several more seconds, wrapping the ex-pair up silently, yet screaming so loudly with emotions from the past. Unbeknownst to Harry, who was much too wrapped up in the way the warmth of the fire perfectly framed your face with shadows and light, one-by-one, the group he was standing with slowly started making their way inside Nadia’s home until it was Harry and one other friend left in the circle. “I think I’m gonna’ head inside with the others if you want to join”, the acquaintance offered, breaking Harry’s stare from yours.

At the mention, Harry's eyes flickered to the inside of the home which was now adorned with colorful lights and music growing louder by the hour. He felt himself cringe at the thought of having to pretend to listen to more conversation and, even worse, doing so over bass-heavy music that made it so you could only hear about 50% of the conversation. It didn't help that the indoors meant having to be further away from you. Even if it was only a simple plastered wall that would cause the separation. Now that he was granted the opportunity to be in the same vicinity as you, even a shut door felt like too much of a blockade between you and him. “'Think I’m gonna’ hang out here a bit actually, but I’ll catch you guys later.”

The pair clapped a hand together in a friendly gesture before they went their separate ways, meaning Harry was now free to do the very thing he felt so desperately drawn to doing. Even if it caused his confidence to be thrown out the window and replaced with a set of nerves that felt like an earthquake in his shaking hands. Harry pursed his lips and took a deep breath in before exhaling through flared nostrils.

He could do this. He had to do this. Without wasting any more precious time, Harry spun on the heels of his sneakers until he was unashamedly facing in your direction. Little did Harry know, mere moments ago your mind had been trapped in one of the worst memories of the relationship you shared.

Not even the break-up stung like that night, because by that point you had already made up your mind. Any love was being overtaken by the anger and sadness that was brought on by him. Unlike at the bar where you were desperately still trying to navigate how you could make this work with him; how you could still be with him despite all the pain and alcohol and words that he would never remember saying to you in the morning. Seeing the person walking towards you who starred in your past wasn’t ideal, to say the least. Yet, you couldn’t keep your eyes off of him. Harry felt like a car crash. You knew you shouldn’t look back because it could scar you for life, yet your mind couldn’t detach itself - it was as if it were an addiction that you didn’t have much control over, and Harry seemed to be that fix that you would always crave. Meanwhile, Harry continued his stride as his eyes moved to his shoes and his hand subconsciously racked through the thick brown strands on the top of his head.

The closer he got, the more Harry could feel the suffocation from his own racing pulse that seemed to be moving quicker than his lungs ever could.

To pass the time of the length of the walk to you, Harry resorted to scorning himself internally with demonizing questions like “Why the fuck are you doing this?”, and, “What are you even going to say to her?”.

“Mind if I sit?”, is what he resorted to as his nervous, shaking knees begged you to accept his request. A gust of wistfulness smacked you in the face just from hearing his deep voice in such proximity again. You couldn’t help but suck in a silent breath and exhale as deeply as you could without it being too obvious.

I guess this was it. This reunion with Harry that you had reminisced and borderline fantasized about was going to come to fruition whether you were ready for it or not. As your eyes met Harry’s form that stood above your seated position, an energy that was so deeply exciting and scary and even a little bit awkward lit up between the both of you

You nodded silently, settling further into your deep-set chair as your knees drew up to your chest. Harry smiled slightly as he cleared his throat and took a seat in the chair that was diagonal from yours. Then - the silence. Harry knew this would be the hardest part. Getting started. Spitting out the first word and confirming it didn’t end in a conversation that would taper off quickly and be followed by awkward quiet. He needed to talk to you, and not that cookie-cutter bullshit sort of talk; actually talk. You deserved that much.

“How’ve you been”, Harry’s voice was a deep hum as he kept his eyes stuck to his shoes that he propped up on the stone pit that contained the burning wood.

“How’ve you been?"

You couldn’t help but think how deep that question was coming from someone like Harry. This wasn’t a co-worker or cashier asking the question, to which you would give a positive response regardless of it being the best or worst day of your life. It wasn’t entirely acceptable to burden a stranger or acquaintance with the grief of your day. Harry was so far from an acquaintance, regardless of you and him not knowing the current versions of one another very well. He would never be someone you would consider to never be close with when he was the person you wanted to spend your life with once upon a time. “Tired, but I’m not the one touring the world so I’m sure you’re a lot more tired than I am", you answer truthfully with a tone that was playful. “So you’ve been keeping up with me?", Harry said with a mischievous grin as his eyes briefly looked up at yours, then back down to the fire. In a playful nod motion, you move your head from side-to-side as you swallow the sip of liquid you’d just taken from your glass. “Kind of hard not to isn’t it?” Harry winces with that smirk still on his mouth, “Touché.”

Your eyes moved from Harry’s to look down at your lap with a closed-lip smile.

“So…you act now?” Your tone was a mixture of genuine curiosity and teasing. “Easy now,” Harry’s chest vibrated with a chuckle, “I’m aware I’m not going to win an Oscar or anything.”

Your shoulders moved upwards in a shrug, “You’re not all that bad I guess.” God, Harry missed your timid sarcasm. He couldn’t believe he was experiencing it. He never thought he would get to again.

“Ah, so you watched me in something then?” Harry’s eyebrow quirked towards the sky. Shit.

Your teeth dug into your bottom lip as your pupils slightly rolled before settling on Harry. “Maybe.”

With pursed lips that aimed at hiding how massive his grin wanted to be, Harry nodded, “I’ll take it.”

You both passed around friendly smiles before simultaneously directing your gazes back to the firepit.

Silence; Harry’s biggest fear blanketed the scene, except it wasn’t what he had expected. It felt more on the end of comfortable, rather than awkward. You, however, were too busy running your inner thoughts through the wringer as you tried to think of a conversation topic that could bring life back into your and Harry’s conversation. Because as nerve-wracking as it was, talking to him and sitting next to him again was something that you didn't want to end this quickly. “So-” “Are-” You both spoke at the same time.

“You go first”, you resign with a smile. To be truthful, Harry hadn’t planned what he was going to say. The only option he could think of was relying on the first thing that came to his mind in the hopes that it, 1). Made sense, and 2). Would encourage the conversation to pick up again. Harry’s mouth silently stuttered as he tried to draw words from his brain until eventually, he blurted out, “Are you seeing anyone at the moment?” Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Harry couldn’t believe that, of all things, was what he chose to say. With your hand propping up your chin, your eyebrows shot upwards. “Right to business then I see.” Briefly, Harry closed his eyes out of embarrassment as he shook his head. “Sorry, that was- I didn’t mean to ask that.” “What did you mean to ask then?”, you poked and pried, fully aware that if Harry wasn’t curious about your relationship status, then why did the question leave his perfectly shaped lips in the first place?

Harry knew you were correct. He didn’t have an answer or excuse to cover his ass, instead, he lowered his head with the brightest, boy-ish smile. You missed how much he beamed anytime he grinned as deeply as he was right now. Slowly, Harry’s chin moved upwards so he was looking at you again, giving you unwavering eye contact. He paused before slouching his upper body and resting his elbows on the tops of his knees.

“Are you going to answer my question?”, Harry spoke, avoiding your question with a tone that was more serious.

“Depends why you want to know." It felt foolish, but Harry could’ve sworn he caught a suggestive flirt to your tone. “Just making casual conversation is all.” Harry fibbed with shrugging shoulders as if your answer to his question didn't feel like a life-or-death situation.

Your eyes briefly examined Harry, from his shoes up to his head, as you studied him curiously. You knew there was more to Harry’s question, however, you didn’t push anymore than you had already.

“No,” you answered. Instantly, Harry felt a weight lift off of his chest. “My last relationship kind of went to shit after she cheated on me more times than I should’ve allowed her to.” At your words, Harry’s blood began to boil. The mention of someone, who had the enormous privilege of calling you their lover, taking advantage of your kindness almost made him question you about what your ex’s address was because he 'just wanted to talk'. Instead, Harry shook his head as he fought the urge to reach out his hand and lightly run his fingertips along your arm in comfort. “She’s an idiot. You know that right?”

Your lips formed into a line and your eyes averted Harry’s gaze. Truthfully, you never cared for your ex-girlfriend much anyways..except for the shape of her hips and the way her velvety skin felt on your tongue. You knew it was wrong, but she was merely a body that occupied your time. “What about you? Are you seeing anyone these days? I can imagine you’re still fighting them off with a stick.” You watched as Harry shook his head with his lips wrapped around the tip of the non-alcoholic beer he had been nursing throughout the conversation.

”I am veryyyy single” he emphasized with a drawn-out word.

At the mention, you also felt a weight you didn’t know existed be lifted off of your upper half. “Still fighting them off with a stick though,” Harry said with a smirk. Teasingly, you gave a light backhanded slap to his bicep. The mere moment of your touch sent a shiver down the back of his neck.

“You’re always such a show-off!” Harry shrugged with that infamous smirk on his face, “You asked! I just answered honestly.” The conversation continued to flow freely for another hour; everything felt natural, as if you hadn’t been separated from the other for several years. You found yourself making jokes with him, laughing with him, gossiping with him. It was a little glimpse into what the both of your lives looked like at the beginning of your relationship.

It felt miraculous that you were able to remain kind, civil, and friendly with the man who twisted your world upside down and robbed you of a long-standing relationship in your 20s. You weren’t sure if your ability to remain friendly was because you could see that current Harry was different and that he had made a genuine change to himself without completely changing who he was.

No, he wasn’t a completely different person and you didn’t want him to be. He was very much still the Harry you knew and would always care for, but he had a new view of things. You could tell by how he talked about the happenings in his life and responded to the ones in yours. He seemed more mature and sure of himself and the world around him. It was beautiful to see that sort of growth come into his viewpoint when you knew that person was inside Harry all along. Because that's all you ever wanted. You loved Harry and never, ever wished for him to completely morph himself into another human being. It was the destructive pieces that you wanted him to reconstruct on a foundation that was more stable, not only for him, but those in his life as well. As a natural pause came into your and Harry’s conversation, you suddenly became aware of a chill that ran through the night air. Harry’s eyes stayed on you as he took another sip from his drink, noticing the way your body shivered and your arms tightly tense inwards. “Are you cold?” “Oh, I’m fine. I’ll survive”, you brushed off Harry’s concern with a wave of your hand. Harry wasn’t having it. “Don’t be silly.” Without hesitation, Harry stood up, slipped out of his light jacket, and laid the material across your shoulders. Suddenly, you were enveloped in his natural scent. An unexplainable warmth comforted you and it wasn’t just because of the extra material Harry had graciously placed on your upper half. “Thank you”, You said softly as you huddled your body deeper within his jacket. Fully allowing yourself to take in his scent and the warmth of his body heat that was once tucked underneath this same material. “Of course”, he said as he took his place back in the chair, scooting ever-so-slightly closer in your direction. Throughout your conversation, Harry had been attempting to gauge when would be the best time to bring up the past and his regrets, but he also felt incredibly torn. He wanted to tell you every version of i’m sorry he could think of and let you know that he knew who he was back then was not the person you deserved, especially as your lover. On the other hand, Harry was afraid that if he did bring up the past, it could ruin the peaceful reunion and good nature of your current conversation. How does someone bring a topic like that up casually? “Is something on my face?” Harry’s eyes widened as he drifted back to reality, not realizing that he had zoned out with his eyes on you and you alone. “No, no. Sorry”, Harry shook his head. “I just-”, now that he was fully aware, Harry took the opportunity to shamelessly stay on your face as he examined all the parts of you that looked slightly different, yet familiar from the last time he physically saw you. “-I just missed you,” he finally confessed. You found that hard to believe as you squinted your eyes in denial, “You’ve been putting out albums and going on world tours. How on earth are you thinking of little old me during all of that?”

“Fair point” Harry teased, making you playfully give him a little shove and a “Hey!”. “Joking! I swear,” Harry smiled as he defended with hands in front of his chest. “No need to flatter me. I’m sure it’s true.”

Quickly, Harry shook his head with gently closing eyes. Nothing-absolutely nothing-could ever make him want to forget about you, even if that's what he wanted for the first year or so after your departure. You never left his mind. “I could never forget you. Ever.” Suddenly, things felt very serious and vulnerable and real. The conversation you both shared prior was the foreplay to this moment that you knew was inevitable. How it would go, you hadn’t the slightest clue. All you could do was hope that both of you walked out of this night with, at the very least, a better understanding of the other person and a sense of forgiveness for past sins. The both of you fell quiet as the overwhelming sense of guilt, grief, and nostalgia all came tumbling down on you. How it started - how it was at the climax of all of your joint worries - and the ending that you left as an unsolved riddle because you couldn’t handle that version of Harry any longer. You needed answers.

”Were you mad at me?” You asked, filling the silence of the backyard. Harry released a puff of air from his cheeks and tilted his head to the side ever so slightly, his eyes directly staring into yours.

“What would I have been mad at you about?” ”About me leaving you like that. It was so sudden and I just-I don’t know what came over me. I shouldn’t have left like that without an explanation.”

Harry pondered his answer as he messed with the rings on his fingers while he tried to gather his response properly - it was a complicated one.

”At first, yeah-”, his voice was hoarse as he answered truthfully with his eyes moving to stare ahead at nothing at all.

”-but I understand now. You were done with my bullshit and I could never blame you for that. You had every right to leave me. I would’ve left me sooner if I were in your shoes.”

He was right, you were very done and beyond exhausted with everything you had to put up with for those last years of your relationship with him. However, that didn’t mean you didn’t have some regrets of your own. ”I’m sorry I never returned your messages or explained why.”

Harry quickly started to shake his head before you could even finish your sentence. He spoke softly with gentleness in his tone, “You have nothing to be sorry for. I’m the one who should be doing the apologizing. I was awful to you.”

He was right to some extent. At first, things were great..towards the end, he definitely had a lot to be sorry for, but so did you for not giving him a conclusion to your ending at the time. ”I hope you know how much I know I screwed up. I can’t even begin to tell you how sorry I am and how much I wish I could take back all of that shit I put you through.”

You nodded because just from your conversation and his demeanor, you knew he meant it. You knew that good guy that was deep within him even during the height of his addiction. It was nice to see that person again.

”I know you are and I forgive you for all of it. I mean that Harry.”

Harry’s glossed eyes looked at you in a silent plea. He never felt worthy of your forgiveness or even expected you to forgive him in the first place. Yet, here you were, professing that the past was in the past and you were choosing not to dwell on anything. Harry felt like he was deeply falling in love with your beautiful soul all over again. “If I had asked, would you have stayed?” Harry spoke with a vacant look on his face as he stared into the deep orange fire that crackled loudly amidst the silence. Only now did you notice that the once loud music had been turned down to barely audible and there were only a few other people who still lingered at the gathering inside.

“What?” You asked in disbelief.

“If I had asked”, Harry spoke the same words, but slower. His eyes bore into yours with a serious look on his face, “Would you have stayed?” Now this was a question you had never asked yourself, which was shocking considering the amount of time you had spent analyzing that night and each outcome that could've conspired. Never once did you think about this scenario where Harry groveled on his metaphorical hands and knees, begging for you to say. The worst part was that you didn't have an answer. You could see it going his way with you dropping your packed bag at the front door and snuggling your body into his as you enjoyed the peaceful moments you would get with him just before he fell asleep. On the other hand, you could see your response not changing what so ever, just because of how done and exhausted you were with the relationship that, during that time, had been causing you more harm than good. You sighed and answered with hesitation, “You didn’t ask. So I guess we’ll never know.” It was harsh, but Harry knew it was true. There wasn’t any use dwelling on the ‘what if’ when the invention of the time machine still didn’t exist. Yet he couldn’t help but constantly wonder how if he would’ve done something, anything. If he hadn’t fallen asleep that night, maybe-just maybe-you would still be his. Maybe he would've quit drinking and you'd both have a flat and kids and live happily ever after. Regardless of Harry’s regrets, he nodded in understanding of your response as his fingers instinctively reached for his NA beverage once more. His mouth wrapped around the tip of the glass bottle, slinging down the last remnant of his drink.

You couldn’t take your eyes off of the shape of his mouth and the sight of spit that seeped out from the corner of his mouth. Your gaze followed his every move as he placed the now empty bottle between his spread, trouser-clad thighs. The sight made you clench your thighs together as memories of intimate moments with Harry dared to revisit your brain. Thankfully, your hormones were strong, but your willpower was stronger...for now. Your brain traveled back to the bottle set between his legs. Your curiosity got the better of you, “Did you quit drinking?” Harry’s eyes found yours again as he nodded, “I stopped drinking a few months after you left.” You’d be a liar if you said his words didn’t make your stomach drop from what felt like a seventh-story building.

Ultimately, your departure was the moment things were put into perspective for Harry. He couldn’t have everything and everyone he wanted whilst being drowned in the pits of addiction. You were the wake-up call he was in dire need of answering. It’s funny how you were always the one who was coming to his rescue, whether you knew that breaking up with him was doing that or not. “I’m really proud of you. I’m sure that wasn’t easy.” Your soft voice made Harry genuinely smile and nod his head. He would also be a liar if he said your words didn’t make him feel the flutter of familiar butterflies in his stomach. “It’s all because of you”, He said with honest eyes. Your forehead creased as you shook your head, “That’s not true. It’s not all because of me,”

Harry looked at you quizzically but allowed you to continue your thought process.

“I may have been a factor in you bettering yourself, but that was all you and your willpower Harry. Give yourself that credit. You deserve it”

You always saw the best in him. To the point, it nearly drove him mad.

He didn’t deserve this-this kindness and forgiveness. Jesus Christ, he certainly didn’t deserve you saying all of these things face-to face with him after all he had put you through.

Harry shook his head as his lips tucked inwards. “You can’t say things like that.”

“What do you mean? It’s the truth.”

He wanted you to understand. How could he make you understand?

“You can’t say those things as if I didn’t completely ruin everything we had together. As if I didn’t make you unhappy in our relationship to the point that you had to leave.”

Harry stood up as a rush of energy suddenly began to cook below his skin. He needed to move-do something to release the intensity of it all.

You watched with wide eyes as his thumb moved to pick at the skin on his bottom lip and his feet moved in a slow pace back and forth.

“I killed what we had over and over and over and you’re here telling me it’s okay? It’s not okay! Everything I did to you is the furthest from okay when you took on all of my bullshit and how did I repay you?” Harry spat with a harsh chuckle to himself. “I got wasted every fucking chance I could just so I could get a high. I took away the time we could’ve spent together making memories-happy memories.”

“Harry”, you stood from your chair as your instinct to calm him down and bring some peace to his spiraling mind kicked in. But Harry was deep in the eye of the storm, so much so that his eyes hadn’t even noticed you were now standing in front of him with your hands in front of your chest as you attempted to run into his pacing feet. “Harry stop!”, your voice was louder than before, but not quite a yell or one done out of anger. More so to get Harry's attention and bring him out of this trance. “H”, your voice pleaded as your hands reached up to this face. Somehow, you were able to grasp each of his cheeks in the palm of your hands. Harry’s feet suddenly stopped. Only then did he realize how fast his heart had been beating, but none of that mattered now. All he could focus on was the feather-light touch of you as your thumbs smoothed down the skin on his face. You were close. So fucking close to him. Closer than you had been in years. “It’s okay. Breathe, okay?” Harry nodded silently as he gulped down a lump in his throat, already feeling his heart rate start to tame down to its normal speed.

You were the medicine to put him at ease, yet he couldn’t help but feel bad that you were always the one fixing things. Now, he wanted to fix it for a change. Harry’s hands moved up to yours as he rested his palms on top of yours. Your eyes couldn’t help but stare at the physical and almost intimate contact happening between the both of you. “I mean it when I say I am nothing without you. You made me a better person and there’s nothing I could do to fix all of the past and the shit I did to you…but I’d like to try if you’d allow me to.” You could’ve melted at his words alone, then he had to add in the honesty in his eyes that were boring into yours as if he were trying to enforce to you just how much he meant every word he was saying. “I’d really like that”, your voice was soft as a single tear slid out from your eye. Instantly, Harry slipped a hand off of yours and moved his thumb along the wetness, wiping it away without a trace. “Don’t cry baby”, Harry found himself using your pet name way too easily, as if it were like riding a bike after years of never setting foot on the thing. You sniffled and tilted your face so your cheek rested in the palm of his hand. Something you hadn’t done in forever, yet it felt familiar and like he was meant to always be near you, touching you, living life with you; fucking loving you.

The both of you shared smitten smiles and glossed eyes as you reveled in looks of a fondness one could only share with a past love that was always destined to be rekindled.

“So, what do we do now?”

To be continued

#one direction #fine line #harry styles #harry styles angst #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fic #harrys house #hslot #my writing #harry styles one shot #harry styles x reader #complex

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corruptedcaps · 11 months ago

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The Goddess Complex

The Goddess Complex was originally an early 3 part story I wrote but Tumblr banned part 2 some time ago. I was going to re-release part 2 with SFW images but I thought, screw it I'll rewrite them all into one post. Enjoy!

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Lisa kicked and struggled as two large men strapped her to a stone table in darkened room. She had been taken from her bed in the middle of the night, blindfolded and taken to this place, wherever it was.

As one of the men pulled off her blindfold she finally could see where she was. As far as she could tell she was in some sort of theater. Balconies wrapped around the center of the room, where she was currently tied. Each seat in the theater was occupied by a cloaked figure

"What do you want from me? I didn't do anything wrong! I'm not a bad person!" Lisa screamed but no one answered. No one made a sound. The silence however did not last long and was soon punctuated with the clicking of heels walking into the room.

The cloaked figures seemed to lower their heads in reverence to the person walking in. Lisa strained to see who it was but couldn't get the right angle. The voice she heard next sent a chill down her spine.

"You didn't do anything wrong my dear, you're not a bad person. But don't worry, I'll fix that." Said the cold seductive purr of a woman. Her voice echoing around the walls of the theater.

The woman strolled onto the stage and stood over Lisa allowing her to finally see her. It was the most beautiful woman Lisa had ever seen. She had platinum blonde hair and wore tight black latex. Her face was cold and domineering. Lisa wanted to look away but she was almost hypnotic. Her tits were so large the piece of clothing holding them in was creaking with each movement.

"W-who are you? W-what do you want from me?" Lisa said barely above a whisper.

"My name is Lilith and I am a Goddess. A Goddess of power, of beauty, of darkness. You have been chosen to receive a very special gift. A gift everyone in this room would die for. Many have." Lilith said her voice carrying immense weight.

"Gift? What kind of gift?" Lisa asked, a little intrigued.

"The most sacred of all gifts, my soul. I have had this body for 200 years and grow tired of it. I have had my fun with it, pushed it to sexual, mental and physical extremes and it has served me well but I crave a new body. Your body to be exact." Lilith said with a wicked smile.

"But what happens to me? My mind? My soul?!" Lisa shouted.

"They will cease to be. There will only be me, Goddess Lilith. Your pathetic farm girl body will be transformed into a vessel fit for me and my power. This body I inhabit was once like yours is now. Underdeveloped. Unremarkable. Unfuckable. But when I take control, all that will change." Lilith said almost salivating at the thought.

"Why my body? Take one of your cultists here!" Lisa said suddenly realising the gravity of her situation.

"For the successful transfer to occur, the body needs to be pure, untouched, virginal. All my followers have been spoilt by me." Lilith said almost wistful.

"What? No you can't do this! I'm not even a v-" screamed Lisa as she renewed her struggling.

"I grow weary of this." Lilith said cutting Lisa off as she placed a single finger on Lisas forehead. Instantly Lisa stopped, paralysed unable to do or say anything, her mouth still wide open. The only thing she could move were here eyes.

She watched as Lilith clicked her fingers and a second stone table rose from the floor. She lay down upon it as her followers began to chant in a language Lisa had never heard.

The lights in the room began to flickered and the walls started to shake. Lilith lifted a blade high above her own stomach and with one final incantation word from her mouth she drove the dagger into her chest.

A bright blinding light began to escape from the newly formed hole. The light filled the room making it hard to see. Lilith's arms went limp as the light escaped her body, swirling around the room like a snake. Spotting Lisa's open mouth it dove towards it. Lisa felt a hot sensation as it slid down her throat, slowly diminishing the light in the room until it was all gone.

Lisa blinked, not believing what had just happened. She also wondered why she could still feel her body, why she could now move her fingers again. Why her mind was still intact and not taken over by some crazy evil Goddess. That's when she realised that Lilith and her followers had messed up.

Lisa was by no means sexually active but she also wasn't a virgin. She theorized that they had grabbed her by mistake. There was a pious girl in her town also called Lisa who everyone knew was saving herself for marriage. Could this have been the girl they meant to take?

All Lisa knew was that she had to get out of there before they found out their plan didn't work. Before she could put any plan into action there was movement in the room.

The figures in the room slowly stood up and Lisa closed her eyes pretending to be unconscious. She heard the heavy steps of the disciples surround her.

"Goddess? Was the transfer a success?" She heard one ask.

"Jokes on you, you guys messed up." She thought but then an idea struck her. Maybe she could use this to her advantage to escape. She had to act fast, emphasis on the word act.

Lisa shot her eyes open and looked at the disciple with disdain.

"Of course it worked you fool, how dare you question your Goddess. Now untie these binds." Lisa snarled. For a moment she was worried it had not worked, the man looked confused. However another man quickly pushed him out of the way and began to undo her restraints.

"Forgive him my Goddess, he is a newer recruit to our church. He was merely worried for your well being." The man said as Lisa sat up. She just needed to get out of this room and away from so many of these people, thankfully they seemed to respond to her act so far.

"Worried?" Lisa let out a sarcastic laugh as she turned to the younger member. "I have performed this ritual countless times. Never doubt my power worm." She raised her hand towards him, as if she were to shoot lighting from it.

She didn't even know if Lilith had such powers but as the crowd of people parted in fear as if she were wielding a weapon she thought to herself, "I am nailing this." She would get herself out of there in no time.

"I need to retire to my quarters to recover my strength. You two!" She growled pointing at two disciples who had strapped her down. Despite their hulking appearance they seemed just as worried of her wrath as the the others. It gave Lisa a weird thrill.

"Escort me at once." She said getting off the stone table. The guards bowed and turned, walking towards a door. Lisa followed behind while the rest of the cultists remained in the theater. As they walked through the door Lisa breathed a silent sigh of relief. As well as her act was going she knew she wasn't out of the woods yet.

As they walked down the long corridor, Lisa was finding herself constantly retightening her pyjama pants, she didn't remember them being so loose on her waist. Conversely her sleep shirt was feeling unusually tight around her chest. Not enough to cause any breathing problems but enough to be irritating.

"Before I make my escaped maybe I should change into something a little more comfortable, I'm sure the Goddess won't mind." Lisa thought to herself with a chuckle.

Unbeknownst to her, her body had began to subtly transform. Her boobs were a size bigger, her stomach was more toned and she had instantly dropped ten pounds. These changes seemed to radiate to even the way she walked, each stride more confident than the last, her head held higher with an almost royal like air.

She was about to realise that they weren't the only changes taking place....

PART 2

Lisa was led down many corridors and through several halls until her and her escorts arrived at their apparent final destination.

"This place is a maze. How will I know where to get out?" Lisa thought to herself as they stood before two giant and grand doors. The two burly men each pushed open one of the doors, revealing a room of darkness. Not wanting to appear weak, Lisa strode in confidently. Instead of following the men closed the doors behind her and she was plunged into darkness.

“Shit, now what?” She said to herself.

As if hearing her frustration, all of a sudden candles in the room began lighting themselves around her, illuminating the opulent bedroom. It's decor and design was far more rich and luxurious than the halls she had walked through. It was a bedroom truly fit for a Goddess. At the center of the room was the biggest bed Lisa had ever seen.

"Big enough for an orgy." Lisa thought to herself with a smirk before quickly shaking her head to rid her of the out of character thought.

At the back were two identical doors spaced apart. Pushing open one she found it to be an equally sumptuous bathroom. The floor and walls were lined with marble and at the back of the room was a large and spacious bathtub.

Lisa bit her lip. She knew she needed to get out of there as soon as possible but the bathtub looked so inviting.

“I could use a wash, those brutes weren’t gentle or clean when they took me.” Lisa said to convince herself as she drew the bath.

“It couldn’t hurt to have a little me time.” She mused while taking off her dirty and torn clothing.

She stood before the floor to ceiling mirror fully naked. She put her hands on her hips and posed identically to how she had seen Lilith pose earlier. She didn’t notice her bigger boobs or her tighter waist.

“After all, I am the Goddess.” She said in her best dominant voice as she stared cold eyed at her reflection before breaking and laughing at herself. “Yeah right, me a Goddess?!” She laughed again as she slipped into a black silk night gown that was hanging up as she waited for the tub to fill.

"Those guards might have pulled something, my boobs feel tender and look swollen." She said as she rubbed them. Almost instantly her nipples stood on end.

"Ohhh and they're so sensitive too." She moaned lightly as her fingers made circles instinctively around her rock hard nipples. She was so lost in the sensation that she didn't notice her nails were long and manicured now.

“I wonder if Lilith played with herself like this while bathing. No I bet she would of had people to do it for her. I can see it now ‘you slave caress my nipples… not with your fingers… with your tongue’, yeah I bet she took a lot of pleasure in doing that." Lisa said to herself as a sly grin crossed over her face. She closed her eyes and let the wicked images play out in her mind.

She could see it now, the blonde Goddess beckoning to a waiting well hung man to come over to the bathtub.

“Mmmmm you want to please your Goddess don’t you slave.” Lilith asked to the man who nodded obediently.

"Then prove it." Lisa said herself in a whisper, captivated by the scene before her.

"Then prove it. Show me how much you are devoted to me." Lilith said to the slave echoing Lisa's words. The man walked over to the tub and got in, it's large size proving more than spacious. He stuck his tongue out and traced mini circles around Lilith's nipples.

Both Lisa and Lilith moaned in unison. Lisa was mimicking the action of the slave with her fingers, or perhaps it was her imagination that was following the actions of her fingers? Whatever the case Lisa was finding herself in bliss. Strangely she also found herself closer to the bathtub now too.

"Gooooood. Now lower." Lisa said, her voice now tinged with a level of coldness she had previously lacked. Lilith did not repeat her words this time, choosing to simply point instead.

The man ran his tongue down her body, getting to her clit. He waited however, not wanting to proceed before his mistress allowed it. But he did not look to Lilith, instead he looked at Lisa. Opening her eyes for a second she suddenly found herself in the tub.

Not wanting her fantasy to end she closed her eyes and imagined the man opposite her in the tub, she was now polity in her fantasy. The slave still looked at her, awaiting approval. She was fully in control and it was making her unbelievably wet.

"Do it!" Lisa said in a commanding voice. With a deft move the man's tongue slid into her slit and Lisa moaned once again, her voice deeper and stronger. In her head she could hear Lilith moan in snyc with her as well, if a little quieter than before.

Her hand was clinging on tight to the slaves head directing his tongue around her perfect pussy. “Oh thats it’s make your Goddess cum, you will be rewarded for doing so.” Back in reality she was plunging her fingers deep inside herself, exploring parts of her body she had been too shy to have before. She was verging on having the best orgasm of her life.

“Yessss oh fuck yes. Make me feel your complete devotion to your Goddess. Please your Goddess. I deserve all of this power and worship, I am beautiful, I am powerful….. Ohhhhhhhhhh… I am.... GODDESS LILITH!”. A huge cascade of pleasure engulfed Lisa as she screamed out the name in the echoing bathroom. She held her head and let out soft moans as she experienced the after shock orgasms in waves.

“Ohhhhhhh fuck I can't believe how hard I just came. I haven't done that since…. I don't think I’ve ever came like that.” Lisa said slowly regaining her composure. She spent a few more minutes actually washing herself, all the while resisting the urge to pleasure herself again.

Stepping out of the bathtub grabbed a towel to dry off and found herself staring at her reflection, captivated by the sight. She didn't notice that her boobs had once again grow, now two sizes bigger. Her skin had take on a light tan and her hair, despite just being in the water, looked perfectly sleek and shiny. All she could see was how hot she was.

“Mmmmm maybe it wasn't so crazy to think I could pass as 'The Goddess'. I am obviously sexy enough.” She purred as she took in her reflection vainly for a couple more minutes. She admired her every curve, soon convincing herself that she was in fact Goddess material, if not better. Just as she was contemplating playing with herself some more she realised her clothes were missing.

"Who would dare steal my clothes!?" She said in a booming voice that demanded answers. Stomping out of the bathroom and back into the bedroom she was about to reign down hell on the two guards when her eye caught the other door in the room.

“If that door led to the bathroom then this door must lead to the-" She said throwing open the other door. Her eyes lit up as she saw the inside, and a fiendish smile crept across her face “-the closet.”

Part 3

Lisa stood before racks and racks of clothing. There was everything from elegant ballgowns to skimpy lingerie. High heeled shoes to designer bags. Latex whips to steel chains. She ran her fingers across it all feeling each item slowly. She picked up a whip and ran it sensually across her naked body.

"Mmmm I wonder what naughty things Lilith has gotten up to in here?" She said with a smirk to herself but then quickly shaking it off.

"Ok enough playing around I need to find something that won't have anyone questioning my orders so I can walk right out of here. Not that they should question their Goddess!" She said suddenly snapping into character before shaking it off again.

"I need something dominating, authoritative, powerful." She said to herself while absent-mindedly playing with her tits.

"There are just too many options that look so fucking good and nasty! Hang on what am I saying?!” She thought to herself, these were garments for an evil bitch Goddess. They weren't her style, she just needed to pick something. Grabbing an item at random, she started to put it on.

"No I'm a good kind girl not some crazy cult queen." She said pulling on the knee high latex boots.

"Don't get me wrong though what girl wouldn't want to be worshipped as a goddess?" She said slipping into the tight black latex pants.

"But it's not right to have that kind of power over people... Even if the people are are pathetic helpless worms." She said with a sting of venom behind the last part as she put on the tight latex top, it's material managing to contain the massive tits she now had.

"They would be lost without me really. The Goddess that is. Like ants without a queen. With Lilith gone, they'll be impotent after I escape." She said putting on expensive gold jewelry. Her look complete she turned and faced the mirror.

At first her expression was that of surprise. Her body was pure beauty now. She looked like she had been poured into her outfit, an outfit that screamed power. Her body had morphed over the course of an hour into a perfect female form.

Her new bigger tits were nearly spilling out of her top. Her waist was crunched in so impossibly that it was a miracle she could breathe. Dark mascara had somehow appeared on the eyelashes and lipstick covered her now supple lips.

Her surprise soon warped into a look of contempt. Not for herself but for how she remembered all the disciples in the theater. Seeing her undeniable beauty filled her with disdain for anyone lesser than her which in her eyes was everyone. A cold pleasurable shiver ran over her body.

"Those useless mortals need a Goddess to lead them. They need me. They want me. Of course they do, look at me. I am perfection." She said staring into her own eyes, almost hypnotising herself with every word. She picked up a nearby whip and let it crack, loving the sound it made.

"They need my cruel uncaring hand to guide them, to whip them into shape. Yesssss I was made to be Goddess. Only I am worthy. Others live only to serve my desires." She said in a deeper sexier tone than she was used to.

Suddenly there was a sound from the main bedroom breaking her from her trance. Shaking her head she felt as though she was waking from a dream.

"No! What am I saying? Something is happening to me. Look at my body! I'm all tits and darkness. That bitch infected me with her evil. I need to get out of here away from any remnants of her." She said walking away from the mirror and into the bedroom to investigate the sound, where she found she wasn't alone.

Standing clad in a sleek leotard wielding two daggers as a beautiful blonde with a stern look on her face.

"Ah Lilith I see you've taken a new host. Trying to out fox me no doubt but your reign of evil ends tonight." The blonde assassin said lunging at Lisa who dodged out of the way with superhuman speed, surprising even herself.

"No wait I'm not Lilith. My name is Lisa! Her ritual thing didn't work. I'm just trying to get out of here. Please stop!" Lisa pleaded but the assassin continued her attack.

"Your tricks won't fool me witch!" The assassin said with anger and fury. Again Lisa dodged and countered with ease. Lisa could feel Lilith's power begin to coarse through her body with each dodge, as if being activated by some sort of sense of survival. The more power she gained the more she could feel the dark personality creep back in.

"Please this is just making things worse.... ugh.... for you!" Lisa said holding back the darkness and assassin at the same time.

"Dominate her! Make her kneel before you!" Her conscious was demanding, it's corruption hard to halt.

"No I won't! This is wrong!" Lisa said, pleading with her own thoughts.

"The only thing wrong is not bending her to your will! She should be serving you in the bathtub as you imagined!" Her dark consciousness said causing Lisa to reimagine the bathroom fantasy earlier with the blonde assassin in place of the male slave. She wanted to fight against the feelings but they were making her feel stronger, powerful and horny. It was intoxicating.

Finally the assassin made a last ditch lunge at Lisa who instinctively side knelt out of the way and managed to strike her with the whip. It coiled around the assassin's waist and Lisa pulled it hard, propelling the assassin to her outstretched free hand.

Lisa grabbed the assassin around the neck, lifting her with ease off of the ground. All at once Lisa felt a flood of power invade her senses. She was suddenly consuming the would-be assassins soul and she couldn't get enough. Her body orgasmed again and again as her eyes rolled to the back of her head.

"Nooooooo I have to stop before it’s too laaaaaaaahhhhhhhh.” She screamed throwing her head back. She could feel all of the assassin's memories, emotions, and desires. Her name was Rita, she was part of a group hell bent on destroying Lilith. She had trained her whole life to kill the Goddess but now Lisa was turning her into a loyal follower. She loved every second of it.

“Yessssss this is my destiny." She screamed in ecstasy. "All will kneel before my beauty and tremble. Your soul is just want I needed to complete my evil transformation." Lisa laughed.

The two guards came in from outside after hearing the screaming. They stood in awe of their new Goddess. She let go of her grip on the blonde causing the assassin to drop to her knees. The blonde drained of any resistance, looked up at Lisa.

"How may I serve you Goddess." She said in a zombie like state.

"You fought well Rita and made your way pass these idiotic guards. They are of no use to me now. End them,” Lisa said with a smirk and watched as Rita dispatched the men easily within seconds. Lisa walked over to her new bodyguard with glee, taking her face in her hands.

“Having absorbed your memories I know you're a virgin Rita so I am at a bit of a crossroads. Do I save you and keep you pure so that one day you might be a suitable host for me. Or do I soil your soul and fuck you like the little slut puppet I desire? Decisions, decisions." Lisa said checking out Rita's tight and supple body.

"Mmmm it would be a shame to not taste a treat as sweet as you. Come along." Lisa said walking over towards the bathroom.

“Yes Goddess Lisa.” Rita replied causing Lisa to stop.

"Lilith is such a wonderfully wicked name, it would be a shame to not use it, wouldn't you say?" Lisa said rhetorically.

"Of course, Goddess Lilith." Rita answered back causing a pleasurable chill to run through Lisa's body.

"The Goddess is dead, long live the Goddess." She said with an evil purr and continued into the bathroom.