#Dashers: Nine to Five

[dahersgetontheclock]

Our dashers but in there civilian clothes. White- Max Green- Thomas Red- Zack Blue- Julie

[dexo27]

12 Days of Ingen - Day 9 Of 12 - 🎵Nine Pachyrhinos Sleighing🎵

🎵On the Ninth Day of Christmas, Ingen gave to we, Nine Pachyrhinos Sleighing, Eight Dunkles Dunking, Seven Yuty's Yodeling, Six Brachi's Cuddling, Five Gilded Wings! Four Singing Stegos, Three Gigant Hens, Two Turtle Twins and a Concavenator Sanctuary! 🎵

In the freezing Canadian north, a certain ceratopsid returns to the firgid winter forests, the Pachyrhinosaurus! With their thick fat keeping them warm, they love to wade from the mainland onto their own island in the middle of the lake, like their own fortress of solitude. Bacause of their antler like horns, each Dino is named after one of Santa's reindeer!

Rudolph is the aplha, leading the herd, with a green body and glowing red an white frill display (Limpopo River-Pulchrana)Dasher is orange, with a yellow and blue frill display (Gambia River Basin-Pelophylax)Dancer is grey with a bright purple frill (Yukon River-Rana)Prancer has a lovely green body with icey white and blue frill colours (Champlain Valley-Papurana)Vixen shares the same icey pattern, but with a snowier white-Grey body (Qilian Mountains-Papurana)Comet has a dark grey body and a comet like icy blue pattern outlined in yellow (Sonoran Desert-Lithobates)Cupid is a dark orange with green and pink frill colours (Death Valley-Chalcorana)Donner looks alot like cupid, but with green stripes and dark blue rings, with the yellow replacing the icey blue (Svalbard-Pelophylax)And last but not least, Blizten,with a dark cyan body, green stripes, with a tan underbelly, and green and pink frill colours like Cupid

This is probably the last day I'll be choosing every colour, too many to make each unique now going into double digits😅

[mischa-auer]

Photoplay, December 1938: One Mad Auer by Ida Zeitlin

Transcript of article:

    One day Mischa Auer woke to the realization that he hadn’t had a new tie in eight years. He walked into a haber-dasher’s. “I am the law of compensation,” he told the clerk. “Please give me a tie. Any tie.” Since then the law of compensation has been buying himself a tie a week.

    He hired as a cook a German who’d thumbed a ride from him. “There’s something wrong with that guy,” said Mr. Auer’s wife after one look.

    “Nonsense. You don’t understand the Continental viewpoint. He’s down-and-out. We have to give him a break.”

    It wasn’t until the cook coaxed him one morning at the point of a knife to wash the breakfast dishes that Mischa lost his faith in his protégé.

    He discovered that by rolling grapefruit up and down the black keys of a piano he could get the effect of Debussy’s overtones. His Grapefruit Suite in E-Flat has since become a classic. One day weird sounds issued from the living room. His wife popped her head in. Mischa was instructing his grandmother, an accomplished pianist who, for twenty-five years, had accompanied Leopold Auer, his musician grandfather, in the “grapefruit” technique. “Maybe I better try oranges,” the discouraged pupil was saying.

    “No, oranges are for amateurs. Now once more-so-so-gently-pianissimo- You see? Grandfather would have been proud of you.” With ten dollars in his pocket, and no idea where the next ten was coming from, he’d go to the Cocoanut Grove and have himself a time. When their windows went curtainless for lack of funds, when their bed was an old mattress set up on boards, when they dined off a card table, they still employed a cook and a nurse. “You’re a darling who can’t cook,” he informed Mrs. Auer. “Tony’s a darling who needs a  nurse. I’m a darling who likes to eat. We’ll pay them some day.” So Gooly (the baby’s version of Julia) would get her salary on Monday. Mischa would borrow it back on Tuesday, saying: “Gooly, you’re a sucker and you’ll end in the poorhouse.”

    He’s a kleptomaniac about sunglasses. Money burns holes in his pockets, but for some reason it breaks his heart to pay eighty-five cents at a drugstore for a pair of smoked glasses. Leave your own within his reach and they’re lost to you forever. “You forgot ‘em, they’re mine,” and he bears them off to a hiding place no one has been able to discover.

    He doesn’t trust himself with money. He has a business manager who puts him and his wife on an allowance. Mrs. Auer was normal when they married, but has since become happily infected by her husband’s germ. He insists that checks brought him for his countersignature be covered except for the signature line.

    “All those eighty-eights and ninety-nines depress me.”

    He will never do today what can possibly be postponed till tomorrow or next year. He figures to a split second how long it will take him to make a train and makes it by that split second, calmly watching his secretary’s blood pressure mount. His face is a heavy-lidded mask of melancholy, his eyes are pools of sorrow, but his mind is a capering harlequin that flips the world comic side up, because nothing matters.

    The tragedy of Auer’s boyhood has left one obvious scar. Fleeing from revolutionary Russia with the mother he adored, he found a refuge of sorts in Constantinople. The refugees were herded together under such unspeakable conditions that typhus broke out. Mischa’s mother, trained through the war in Red Cross work, took charge. In two weeks she was dead. The fifteen-year-old knew he had relatives in America, but grief and shock drove from his mind all recollection of names and addresses. A ring taken from his dead mother’s hand provided passage to Florence, where friends of the family lived. Thence he was shipped to his grandfather in New York.

    These are things he prefers to keep to himself. “Every Russian has a story, and they’re all bad. Best to shut up about it.” What he can’t conceal is his dread of being alone. Before his marriage, any one of his closer friends was likely to be awakened by Mischa, strolling into the bedroom at four in the morning. He’d sit down, hold forth in his usual vein and, when daylight broke, take his departure. No explanations of these impromptu visits were ever asked or offered. His friends knew he that he was driven by an unreasoning fear of solitude and the dark.

He and Norma Tillman met in a dress shop. It was Norma’s dress shop. They were both lunching with Mrs. Frank Tuttle, and their hostess had asked Mischa to pick up Norma.

    “You know how most men act in a women’s dress shop,” says Norma. “As if the cops were after them. Well, in walks this long, lean, lanky thing, looks calmly around and comes up to me.”

    “Are you Miss Tillman? I’m Mischa.”

    “And what am I supposed to do?”

    “Go to lunch with me at Tania Tuttle’s.”

    A few days later he phoned. “I’m Mischa. What are you doing Sunday?”

    “I have a date.”

    “I can offer you five. First, I’d like to take you to the tennis matches. From there I’d like to take you to lunch at the Brown Derby. From there I’d like to take you to a cocktail party. From there I’d like to take you to another cocktail party. From there I’d like to take you to dinner at a friend’s house. By that time maybe you’ll be able to tell if you like me.”

    She was startled, amused, curious to discover what lay behind this funny guy’s sad-looking eyes. When she found out and wrote her parents that she was about to marry a Russian actor, they wailed, “In a country full of Americans, why do you have to pick a barbarian?”

    “Tell ‘em that’s why,” counseled Mischa. “A barbarian you don’t pick up on every street corner.”

    Norma had been bred to the theory that you lived within your income, however small. At first Mischa’s lordly ways were beyond her. The sinister Orientals, which were all he could get to do, failed to cover the budget. With bill collectors at the door, Norma would wring her hands and weep.

    “What difference will it make a hundred years from now?” Mischa would yawn, and go to sleep. He wasn’t as imperturbable as he would have had it appear, but he had a perfect defense mechanism. When upset, he got sleepy. The moment he heard, and by some sixth sense recognized a collector’s ring, he’d tumble into bed and sleep like a fool.

    Little by little, she caught his spirit. He was always gay, she was always worried. Therefore, he must be right and she must be wrong. Besides, you had to live with Mischa as you found him or stop living with him and the latter thought never entered her head. Bill collectors and all, she was having more fun than she’d ever known life could offer.

With “My Man Godfrey”- and the now-famous gorilla act- came the turn in the tide. The Auers were pleased but not proud.

    “I signed a long-term contract with Universal today,” Mischa announced.

    “Well, don’t get any fancy ideas,” returned Norma. “You’ll be treated with the customary disrespect.”

    He doesn’t work at being a funny man. His humor is casual, carefree and unself-conscious and wells from a seemingly inexhaustible fount. He can do things with his face that would put a gargoyle to shame. Henry Koster was directing him in Universal’s “The Rage of Paris,” Danielle Darrieux’s first starring vehicle in America. He had to steel himself to watch one of Mischa’s close-ups.

    Take after take was ruined by his own ill-suppressed snorts of mirth. Finally in despair, he covered his face with his hands. “Do it yourself, Mischa. I won’t look.” But halfway through the take, he was peering like a fascinated child from between his fingers. “I have seen many actors do things,” he apologized, “but this is the first time I have seen a man turning his face inside out.”

    Mischa Auer’s mind is as facile as his features. As the Indian in “The Gay Desperado,” he had to streak, catfooted over a stretch of ground. The director, explaining the action, grew a little involved.

    “I want you to put the spirit of all the Aztecs into this. I want you to run like a mirage. No- wait a minute- a gazelle- that’s it. Run like a gazelle, Mischa.”

    “Male or female?” Mischa inquired patiently.

    One night he and his wife were driving home from the Cocoanut Grove. “Wish we could take a trip,” said Norma idly.

    In Mischa’s head something clicked. “We’re taking a trip.”

    “When?”

    “Soon as this picture’s finished.”

    “Where?” The words Normandie Avenue flashed by on a street sign. “Europe. On the Normandie.”

    And they did. It was a red-letter day for Mischa when they went down for their passports. He, the exile, the refugee, who’d never had anything but a Nansen passport, who’d spent three terror-stricken days on Ellis Island before the gates of America opened, was getting his first American passport. For once he lost his composure and, when they shoved the little book under his nose, he signed it: “Best wishes, Mischa Auer.”

    Curiously enough, it was Norma who had trouble in satisfying the authorities.

    “Nice business,” Norma grumbled. “You’re a foreigner, I’m an American- quarter Indian, to boot. So they send you sailing through and they hold me up.”

    “Very simple,” explained Mischa kindly, for the benefit of all who had ears. “It’s because I’m white.”

    Tony shows unmistakable evidence of being his father’s offspring. He, too, has a talent for slipping out from under. In a moment of stress, a certain invisible Bessie was conjured to the rescue. He was being reprimanded. “That wasn’t me who did it. That was Bessie.”

    “Bessie who?”

    “Bessie Purex.”

    “Where is she?”

    “There.” He waved into space.

    Thereafter, Tony became an angel of light; Bessie, the miscreant, shouldered his misdeeds. Then Bessie faded. “Went to Reno,” says Mischa. At four, Tony stands on his own feet. When he gets into trouble, he’s banished to the upper regions, known as Siberia. During his exile he becomes Siberia Sam. Mischa is rarely called on to play the heavy parent. “The role doesn’t suit me.” But Tony had acquired a habit of ordering people about and his father was elected to break it. He found Siberia Sam lying comfortably on his stomach, chin cupped in his palms.

    “So I give him this marvelous fatherly-advice speech, this man-to-man basis. ‘Let me hand you a tip, Tony. If you yell at people, they won’t like you. Be nice, and you’ll get more.’” 

    Carried away by his own eloquence, he went on and on. Tony watched him, transfixed. “I’m going over like a million dollars,” thought Mischa. At length he ran down. “Well, what do you think of it?”

    Tony spoke with finality. “I think nothing of it. Why do you make such funny faces?”

    Mischa’s idea of the good life is to live in the tropics on ten dollars a year and do his ape act on the waterfront for drinks. Not that he has any current complaints. He’s as gay as when the wolf howled at his door, but no gayer. He’ll concede that his present existence has its advantages. “For instance, we moved down to the beach. I left the house in the morning, got down to the beach house at night and there were my shaving things in the bathroom. Then I sensed my power. For the first time I felt like my grandfather. Boy, what a racket!”

    Universal loaned him to Columbia for the Capra production of “You Can’t Take It With You.” He felt at home with the screwball family created by George Kaufman and Moss Hart. Alice, youngest of the Sycamores, said of them: “I know they do rather strange things- I never know what to expect next- but they’re gay and they’re fun- I don’t know- there’s a kind of nobility about them. That may sound silly, but I mean- the way they just don’t care about things other people give their whole lives to.”

    We’ll waive the nobility, lest Mischa sue for libel. Just the same, he’s a Sycamore at heart.

[cinnonym]

i don't want a lot for christmas (there is just one thing i need)

Written for Day 2 - Tradition/Family of 12 Days of Supercorp @supercorpbb

Read on AO3

***

The two cups of steaming hot chocolate that Kara had somehow  managed to prepare were sitting in a precarious spot on the couch table, and Lena couldn’t help her eyes being drawn to them time and time again with every grand gesture Kara made.  

“Favourite Christmas decoration!” She was currently exclaiming, hands flowing up before Lena could reply. “No, wait wait, I can guess that, hold on, hold on hold on hold on – candles!”

“Accurate.” Lena smiled when Kara squealed like a little kid. For someone who claimed to be immune to earth spirits, Kara sure had a peculiar reaction to the two or three gloggs they’d had at the Christmas market. Ever since they’d come home to the loft, the Kryptonian had been oscillating between making heartfelt confessions of her love for Lena, zipping through the room at super-speed, and conducting a comical little quiz show with herself to see how well she knew her girlfriend.

“Guess mine!” Kara grinned widely, and suddenly she was hanging upside down from the ceiling, a waterfall of hair cascading down like tinsel.

Lena let out a laugh, while also moving the cups somewhat closer to the centre of the table, just in case.

“Stars?”

“Yes!” Kara pressed a sound kiss to Lena’s lips as a reward, a rule of their game that Lena found herself being rather fond of. “How did you know?”

Lena let her gaze wander over the nine or ten three-dimensional paper stars on the couch table, the cluster of folded stars stuck to the windowpanes, the literal hundreds of them pinned to every branch of the Christmas tree, and shrugged.

“Lucky guess.”

“Aww,” Kara pouted, simultaneously sliding into Lena’s lap, “It’s unfair how good you are at guessing.”

Lena hummed. “It’s because you’ve been asking the same questions all evening now.”

“Have not. Favourite – “

“Christmas song? Yours is All I Want for Christmas is You – which continues to be a terrible choice, by the way – and mine is Fairytale of New York.”

“Pff,” Kara made, followed up by a series of kisses down Lena’s neck. “And what about your favourite – “

“Reindeer? Vixen. Yours is Dasher because, I quote, ‘we’re both of us dashing, aren’t we,’ to which I – “ Lena hissed when Kara hit a particular sweet spot “ – partially agreed. What are you doing?”

“Shh.” Kara’s lips dragged across Lena’s throat to her collarbone, the faintest hint of teeth in her smile. “I’m distracting you from winning the game.”

The laugh Lena released was decidedly more breathy than before. “I’m not even playing the game.”

“You are now. Favourite pattern on wrapping paper?”

“Yours?” Lena arched into Kara’s touch. “Stars again, though you changed it to glogg mugs after your third.”

“They are very cute, I never noticed that before. Like, so teeny tiny and sort of shaped like so,” Kara raked her nails down Lena’s back in an arbitrary pattern.

Lena’s deadpan “They’re shaped like regular mugs just smaller” came out garbled in response. Kara breathed a chuckle into the hollow of her throat.

“Favourite Christmas tradition.”

Lena frowned. “Objection. You haven’t asked that before.”

“So?” Kara grinned innocently up at her, hands slipping beneath Lena’s blouse. “Answer the question or admit defeat.”

“Not fair,” Lena muttered, but her complaint was cut short by a warning squeeze of her hips. A moment later, Kara’s fingers began creeping upward.

“It’s not that hard.” Her thumb brushed over Lena’s waist, then her ribs. “It starts on C.” She licked her lips. “It’s edible.”

Lena groaned, straining against the feather light touches, but Kara moved out of reach each time she tried to lean closer.

“Guess,” she murmured, inches away from Lena’s lips, “Guess or give up.”

“I don’t know,” Lena hissed, not even caring how pathetic she sounded, “Fucking Christmas cookies maybe?”

The smile that spread on Kara’s face was bright enough to light half a dozen Christmas trees, and the next moment her body was flush against Lena’s, and Lena’s was flush against the mattress, and Lena barely had time to damn that super-speed before her brain disconnected.

***

“What’s yours?” Kara asked afterwards, drawing lazy circles on Lena’s bare back.

“My what?”

Kara grinned at the sleepy contentment in her voice. “Your favourite Christmas tradition, of course.”

“Oh.” Lena thought about that. “Opening the Christmas cupboard probably.”

“What is that?”

Kara’d sat up, her blue eyes already clear again. Her glogg haze seemed to have vanished and her alien stamina kicked in. Lena barely suppressed a yawn.

“It’s an Irish thing, I guess,” she said slowly. “I remember my mam doing it, and I took it up again now that I’m living alone.” She smiled. “Actually, I think you will like this. It’s a cupboard filled with sweets and chocolate and really expensive liquors, and it’s locked throughout the year, but in December, for special occasions, you may open it and share the treats with guests and family.”

“Wait,” Kara held up her hand, “Pause, pause. Are you telling me you have a whole closet full of sweets, and you only eat them in December?”

“It’s a mortal sin to open the Christmas cupboard during the year, unless it’s to restock.”

Kara gaped. “But you have the key, don’t you. How do you resist the temptation?”

“It’s a family honour to carry the key,” Lena said, appalled. “I take my duties very seriously.”

“Of course,” Kara murmured, a faint blush creeping into her cheeks. “Sorry.” Then she brightened. “Wait, you can only open the Christmas cupboard when guests are over, right?”

Lena nodded, “Yeah.”

“Does one person constitute as guests?”

“Depends, I suppose, on the person.” Lena scratched her nose. “I don’t know the specifics either, since I only experienced it when I was really young, but I think if it’s an important person then yes, that should count.”

A sly smile spread on Kara’s face. “An important person… Like a local superhero maybe?”

Lena threw her head back in a sudden bout of laughter. “Are you thinking of someone in particular?”

“Well, I am close friends with Supergirl after all…”

“Right,” Lena said wryly, not quite able to keep the smile from her face. “Well, if Supergirl were inclined to be my dinner guest some day, I am sure something could be arranged with the Christmas cupboard.”

“Yes!” Kara high-fived Lena’s hand that lay loosely on her stomach, then pressed a kiss to her fingers.

“Who knows,” she said, “maybe I’ll have to change my favourite tradition too.”

[starlitskvader]

If you're still doing it, 10 facts about Pixie? :D

1. Basic Stats! She’s 2′6″/76cm and weighs 30lbs/13.5kg most of the time; her adult size is 3′5″/107cm and 45lbs/20kg. (She’s lighter than most Mobians of her height due to that whole not-having-bones thing.)

2. In any continuity she’s roughly a year older than Tails - so she’d be five in AOSTH, eleven in SatAM, and has nine as her ‘default’ age due to Tails’ official age being eight.

3. Pixie loves water and has a nostalgic fondness for it due to baby dragonflies being aquatic - she was a wingless waterbaby until she was about four - but she can’t really swim anymore because her wings will weigh her down if they get too wet (and she won’t be able to take off - flying in the rain is no issue because her wings beat so rapidly they don’t really get wet, but she’d have some problems if she played around in the river too much.)

4. Since she’s a dragonfly, she can see a huge number of colors as well as different light spectrums - she makes a good scout because she can see trip lasers. But she does also get confused about what her friends can and can’t see, so she can get frustrated trying to explain what she’s looking at fairly quickly. (On the other hand her antennae aren’t nearly as sensitive as other insects’ and are mainly good for measuring air speed, though she might pick up pressure changes or electrical charges sooner than mammals.)

5. She does not pick up on the unspoken well at all. She’ll do her best, but you really have to actually tell her what you expect from her because she’s just not gonna get the hint. (As evidenced by these two doodles: 1, 2)

6. She molts about once a year and gets really grumpy when it’s starting to come up. She doesn’t like the dull look of her exoskeleton leading up to it, it’s tight and itchy, and she hates the entire thing. (As an adult she’ll only shed when her exoskeleton is somehow damaged.)

7. She’s specifically a blue dasher!

8. Pixie’s father, Marcel Longepenne, is the engineer that made both Dusty’s shock gloves and Valir’s heat sword in SatAM/Archie continuities. He probably did make at least Dusty’s gloves in game continuities. Pixie herself has no talent for engineering, but she finds machines fascinating and will happily paly gofer for Tails, Rotor, or Chuck for hours. (As mentioned in previous asks Valir belongs to @gojira007!)

9. Pixie is claustrophobic - if she can’t stand with her wings fully spread without touching any walls, it’s too small and someone needs to get her out of there before she hurts herself looking for an escape.

10. She’s not at all suited for physical combat, but as noted she makes a great scout... and she’s also interested in firearms. She’s not allowed any of her own just yet, but her agility and superb eyesight will make her essentially a living fighter jet when she’s a little older!

10 Character Facts

[ancientbooshartifacts]

Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vince

Author: xLions_Roarx_

Year: 2007

Rating: PG

Pairing: Howince

Two zebras. It didn't take much to grab Vince's attention. The one on the left seemed white with black stripes, the other black with white. Or was it the other way around. "'Scuse me?" Vince lightly tapped the bars to the pen. The zebras were slow to move, swishing their tails a few times before slowly turning their heads to face the weird looking human staring happily at them. "Yes." Lefty zebra dragged out the 's' as it munched cooly on hay between it's front teeth. "Oh you speak english, that's good. Didn't think you did because-" "Of course we speak english boy...girl...human. We're from Kent." "Kent?" Vince raised a questioning eyebrow as he cautiously moved around the outside of pen to face the zebras. "Yes. You look like you haven't seen a zebra from kent before." "Well actually I haven't." There was a crooked polite smile, before the talkative of the two zebras spat at the comment and swished it's tail before moving off. "Wait. I thought we could have a conversation...y'see I'm a bit bored. Ma' mate Howard, well you probably don't know him but we had a bit of an arguement and he's not speaking to me. Hey do you like Gary Numan?" ~~ "I'm bored..and it's Tuesday, and it's raining..and Howard's hidden my poncho. What do you guys do in these gloomy situations?" Vince huddled under an umbrella he was sharing with William and Gerald, two lemurs, new to the zooniverse. "Well I usually stay in and have a spot of earl grey, Gerald here is more of the party animal." "Yeah, so what do you do?" Vince grinned staring down at the two pairs of small monkey eyes. "I usually go for a game of scrabble. Maybe even cludo if I'm feeling adventurous. Wanna' play?" The lemur asked already climbing off the steps of the enclosure and rummaging through his hut to locate his board games. "Actually, just remembered I've gotta' meet Howard for lunch but, raincheck?" "Sometime in the week." ~~ Vince hated Tuesdays, even in December, it was just plain boring. All the christmas decorations were up and now there was nothing to do. Maybe a quick trip to the hut to pick up his walkman would cheer him up. Passing the ape enclosure, he spotted Bollo reading a copy of "Good Housekeeping" which Bollo quickly changed to "Monkey Nuts" when he saw Vince approach. "Hello Mr Bollo, how are you today?" Vince smiled, wrapping his gloved fingers around the bars of Bollo's cage. "Good, hey Vince I have abit of zoo gossip for you, and for once it's not about Howard." Bollo grunted, dropping his magazine and walking up to the bars. "Oh yeah?" Vince looked around cautiously like a school girl about to learn something about her crush. "Rumour is Bainbridge is bringing in some new animals in today..." Vince's face dropped slightly. "That's not really gossip Mr Bollo." "But Vince, they're not any ordinary animal, rumour is, they're reindeers." Bollo's gruff voice was barely audible at the word "reindeers." "Reindeers?!" Vince repeated although much louder and with a wild gleam of excitement in his bright blue eyes. "Shhhh, yes, Big Joe over heard Bainbridge and Fossil talking, Bainbridge said they'd be here Tuesday if everything goes according to plan." "I've got to tell Howard." ~~ Howard was no more, he was free from the boundaries of daily life and from his own body, he was just a wandering spirit heading towards the sun and for once he was completely at peace. "HOWARD!!" It was just a distant memory, nothing to worry about, he was long gone. "HOWWWWWARD!!" The vision of a bright white sky and a perfectly golden sun quickly evaporated to the sound of Vince's palm hitting Howard's cheek. "Ah!" Howard's eyes shot open only to be met with a pair of big blue ones. "What have I told you about disturbing me when I'm in a trance." "But it's big news Howard!" Vince hopped up and down in excitement. "That's what you said last week, but monster munch in the vending machines isn't really big news is it?" The elder gent sighed. "It's bigger than that Howard!" "What there's mini cheddars in there too now?" Howard joked. "Reindeers Howard!" Vince blurted out grabbing hold of Howard's arms in excitement. "We're getting reindeers like Santa. We could fly to the moon in a big sleigh delivering presents to the children of mars." "Are you ill? Reindeers can't fly Vince, they are just glamorised deers." Howard said flatly, taking back his arms from Vince's grip. "They can fly, Santa's reindeers wouldn't walk around the world in one night would they?" "Santa's reindeers?! Santa is a fictional character." Howard lowered an eyebrow and the younger man. "What?" Vince returned the look. "Santa isn-" Howard was interupted by the familiar crackle of the zoo's intercom. Moon see me in my office now, thank you. "Look we'll finish this conversation later, but Vince, don't get over excited about them, they're just deers." Howard smiled slightly, giving Vince a nod before leaving the hut. Vince just shrugged, dropping himself onto the sofa over-dramatically. ~~ "Santa is real isn't he Bollo?" Vince asked the wise old ape as he brushed his thick chocolate coloured fur. "Of course he is Vince, he bring Bollo five bananas last year, although I did ask for a jeti-ski." Bollo snorted. "Thanks Bollo." Vince put his arms around the ape, kissing his wooly head. "Fossil you prick, hurry up with that cage before anyone sees." The boom voice of Dixon Bainbridge was suddenly heard as he neared the ape enclosure. Vince quickly scrambled behind Bollo and hid as Bainbridge passed Bollo's pen quickly followed by Bob Fossil struggling to keep up with a large cage in his hands. "Coming Bainbridge." Fossil chirped as he hurried out of Vince's eyeline. "It must be the reindeers Mr Bollo." Vince whispered. "Hm." Bollo nodded. "I'm going to take a look." Vince explained, getting to his feet quietly and crouching as he crept to the door of Bollo's pen. "Be careful Vince, Bainbridge is one not to be messed with." Vince nodded to Bollo and carefully opened and closed the door with nothing but a quiet squeak. Bainbridge and Fossil were heading to the main gates, Vince followed but with a cautious distance between them, the sound of bleating becoming louder and louder as they neared the gates. Bainbridge pulled open the heavy gates, a van stood outside the zoo with the noisy animals within. "Fossil, hurry up with that cage." Bainbridge repeated, sliding the bolts on the van's backdoors. Vince crept around the corner and ducked in behind the side of Naboo's souvenir stand. The ramp of the van hit the concrete paving with a clunk and the sound of nine pairs of hooves clunking nervously to the back of the van was heard. "Take them to the enclosure at the back of the zoo, I'll deal with that one." Vince listened carefully to Bainbridge's voice, barely peaking his head around the side of the stand. There was a collection of loud unsettling bleats and clunking of unsteady hoofs along with Bainbridge cursing before Vince saw Fossil pass with a roped reindeer dragging behind him. It was just like the ones in the story books, his fur was a thick white, eyes a frosty blue and his hooves shimmered a bright silver when the light from the lamps surrounding the court yard hit them. It looked at Vince briefly as it's head swayed back and forth, trying to fight Fossil's pulling. It then let out a sad wordless cry before being yanked forward. Vince looked back to the main gates, Bainbridge wasn't looking his way, so he crept out of hiding and followed Fossil and the reindeer. ~~ "In there Mr Stick-Head man." Fossil led the reindeer into it's pen, tying the rope it was attached to to the back wall. Fossil then left whistling "Jingle Bells". "Be you enemy or be you friend strange human?" The reindeer asked as Vince appeared from behind a corner. "I am a friend." Vince said happily, brushing dust and strands of hay from his tight jeans. "Why do the others treat us so?" The reindeer moved as close as he could to the front of the pen with the restriction of the rope. "Fossil and Bainbridge? They're just mean, you should see how they treat my friend Howard." "Haahwoood." The reindeer repeated. "Is he as scary looking as you?" "Pretty much." Vince chuckled. "So what's your name?" "My name human? It's Da-" There was the sound of jingling keys and footsteps on the otherside of the enclosure's door. "I've got to go Mr Reindeer, if Bainbridge catches me in here I'm toast." "Then go human, but you must come back tomorrow." Vince nodded, and with a brief wave he disappeared down the enclosure's corridor and out through the backdoor. ~~ For the first in weeks it wasn't the minus temperatures in the hut that woke Vince up, no, tonight it was shouting. Noisey neighbours when you lived in the zoo was quite common, but when you had lived there for so long one couldn't sleep without the sound of a parrot squaking. But this was shouting, a man, and for once it didn't sound like Bainbridge. Vince untangled himself from Howard's sleeping form, silently getting up and pulling his sleeping bag over his bare chest and hopping to the window. "You won't get away with this boy!" The low enough voice to challenge even Dixon Bainbridge's echoed through the air. "Oh shut up you old coot." Bainbridge's voice snapped. "You wicked, wicked man!" The angry voice spoke again. Three figures hurried passed the window, well, two figures, dragging a third, much fatter and shorter figure. "Hey Bainbridge, want me to put him in the jungle room?" Fossil's voice was then heard with a tone of mischieve. "No Fossil, lock him up with the reindeers, I'll deal with him later." Bainbridge cackled. "You can't do this, you naughty little boys, I'm Santa Claus!"

[out-of-time-beyond-reproach-blog]

Today was an awful day to be a Dasher, five separate restaurants were demeaning, condescending, and disrespectful the level of rudeness is disgusting honestly. I couldn’t find the Taco Bell after nine Tonight because the sign was not illuminated. I entered and instantly scowled at, but I said politely I was here for pick up. I waited patiently noticing the drive thru worker was just standing there, every time I would look up from my phone she would quickly look away. I noticed the manager leaving the establishment to go to her car, the other two employees were cleaning. After five minutes I asked about my order (the order was five minutes late for completion) she said she would “make it right now”, she wasn’t nice about it either. I said what you haven’t even started it and it’s five minutes past pickup? That’s when I was looked at with shock and treated incredibly bad. When the manager entered the girl who was making the food said something in another language and the manager laughed, then they laughed and said awful things as I was walking out the front door!! Flipping me off!! I will start wearing a camera now. I am a single parent of three, no help whatsoever, working seven days a week, mostly 12 hour days. I don’t have it all, in fact I have next to nothing! The things that I am currently going through in my life is heartbreaking yet I smile treat people with respect and kindness. I wasn’t rude about asking, I was just shocked at the audacity of the situation!! Five different restaurants treated me so terribly. I worked from 10 this morning until 10 tonight. Sadly I made 120 dollars. After taxes and 30 bucks for gas, where does that leave me? But I’ll get up tomorrow and deliver for others knowing I’ll be hated no matter how kind I am to others. Yet I’ll still be respectful, considerate, and kind. Washington is the worst for rudeness, even worse when you call them out. It’s sad honestly.

[iamchikara]

Results for the Infinite Gauntlet under the cut.

Match #1: Singles Contest Arik Cannon vs. Mike Quackenbush (2 points) Really strong opener at just over fifteen and a half minutes, which is way more than most CHIKARA openers have gotten lately. Finish was described as a cross-legged tombstone piledriver (which IIRC is the Quackendriver II), which led to Quack getting the pin. Post-match, Cannon and Bryce Remsburg got into it a bit. WINNER: Mike Quackenbush (3 points) Match #2: Four Corner Elimination Tag The Beast Warriors (1 point) vs. Crummels and DeFarge vs. Dez Peloton vs. To Infinity and Beyond Boar and Oleg dominated the early going, cleaning house of all their opponents and isolating Cornelius Crummels. Unfortunately for them, their opponents got revenge, and with an assist from Dez Peloton’s Donald Kluger, Sonny DeFarge was able to drop Oleg and everyone dogpiled on him to eliminate the Beast Warriors in five and a half minutes. Crummels and DeFarge were also subjected to a chopfest from the assembled children, who all came running once they realized what was happening. Kluger soon evened the odds, pinning Colin Delaney after a toss powerslam double team in just over nine and a half minutes, leaving the longtime rivals once again at odds. Unfortunately for the biker boys, Crummels and DeFarge came away with the win and two points after an assisted curb stomp on Jasper Tippins in just under thirteen minutes. Even though they’re still having issues, the legitimate businessmen are now established as the only team at two points. If they succeed in getting their third point, what’ll this mean for the state of the Regime? WINNERS: Crummels and DeFarge (2 points), the Beast Warriors are out of the standings Match #3: Two-on-One Handicap Match Trollzilla w/The Whisper vs. Bodyslam Bobby and Waistlock Wade SQUASH. Troll killed these guys in less than a minute. WINNER: Trollzilla Match #4: Singles Contest Mark Angelosetti vs. Mr. Anderson Anderson received an assist with his entrance from West Pocono Jr. High’s teachers, who dropped the mic for him. Another big, competitive fifteen minute match which saw Touchdown get back on the winning track, pinning the debuting Anderson after the Flea Flicker. WINNER: Mark Angelosetti (1 point) Match #5: Campeonatos de Parejas Defense #2 The Closers w/*sigh* Juan Francisco de Coronado vs. Razerhawk and Nytehawk Unfortunately for those futuristic flyboys and their championship ambitions, the Closers dominated two straight falls to retain their titles. Nytehawk was pretty well murdered with a butterfly underhook piledriver and the Deal Breaker in eight minutes to end the first fall, and remained on the mat for the second fall. The second fall only lasted about four more minutes and saw Razer brutalized by the Closers with what was described as a fireman’s carry into a uranagi. Nyte was carried out post-match, presumably to where Sylver was taken when he was destroyed. WINNERS: The Closers INTERMISSION Match #5: The Infinite Gauntlet #1: Green Ant #2: Hallowicked #3: Hermit Crab #4: Cajun Crawdad Green Ant fought valiantly against the assembled rudos, until... #5: Thief Ant, coming in just in time! Unfortunately for the Ants and prob’ly ‘Wicked... #6: Merlok 3/4ths of the Creatures of the Deep were in the match already. #7: Fire Ant Fire and Green temporarily teamed up... ELIMINATED: Cajun Crawdad, by Fire and Green ...and then that temporary alliance went the way of the dodo. ELIMINATED: Green Ant, by Fire Meanwhile, Merlok and ‘Wicked formed a temporary alliance of their own. ELIMINATED: Thief Ant, by Merlok and Hallowicked #8: Princess Kimberlee #9: Grizzly Redwood A train of submissions soon formed! #10: Still Life #11: Hype Rockwell (bit of a botch with ring announcing here as he was announced as #12) #12: Officer Warren Barksdale #13: Ursa Minor #14: Jakob Hammermeier Barksdale attempted to arrest Hammermeier for going after the Nouveau Aesthetic. #15: The Whisper #16: BLANK The full Nouveau Aesthetic immediately converged upon hated rival Rockwell, hitting a triple team piledriver. ELIMINATED: Hype Rockwell, by the Nouveau Aesthetic #17: Flex Rumblecrunch Unfortunately for Hermit Crab, the returning Rumblecrunch made him his victim. ELIMINATED: Hermit Crab, by Flex Rumblecrunch Rumblecrunch then focused on Merlok and muscled out the Menace of the Deep as well! ELIMINATED: Merlok, by Flex Rumblecrunch #18: Oceanea Bereft of her court, the Queen of the Deep still made a beeline straight for Princess Kimberlee, and royalty battled royalty. #19: Lucas Calhoun Calhoun hit Still Life with a nerve chop, and was joined by a slew of people to help break down the Nouveau Aesthetic’s numbers. ELIMINATED: Still Life, by Lucas Calhoun w/others #20: Glacier Glacier went right for Calhoun, then managed to score a pretty shocking elimination on an odds-on favorite. ELIMINATED: Hallowicked, by Glacier #21: Icarus Continuing his crusade against the rookies, Icarus went right for and tossed out Barksdale, then hit a shiranui on Redwood but wasn’t able to eliminate him. ELIMINATED: Officer Warren Barksdale, by Icarus #22: Solo Darling Darling seems to have had Fire’s number as of late, lifting him with a fireman’s carry and tossing him out. ELIMINATED: Fire Ant, by Solo Darling #23: Travis Huckabee #24: Blanche Babish Darling and Rumblecrunch formed an impromptu team at this point. Might be an interesting duo if it carries on outside this match. #25: Kobald #26: Jeremy Leary Leary has shown some interest in Babish as of late, and that carried over into this match, as an assist from him gave Babish the advantage against the Whisper, who she made tap with the Soda Jerk. ELIMINATED: The Whisper, by Blanche Babish w/Jeremy Leary #27: Dasher Hatfield Dasher immediately set to work, putting Rumblecrunch to sleep and causing his elimination. Rumblecrunch was promptly clotheslined out after being revived. Not long afterward, Dasher disposed of Hammermeier as well. ELIMINATED: Flex Rumblecrunch, by Dasher Hatfield ELIMINATED: Jakob Hammermeier, by Dasher Hatfield The battle of royalty was won by Princess Kimberlee, who tossed her new rival Oceanea out. ELIMINATED: Oceanea, by Princess Kimberlee #28: El Hijo del Ice Cream #29: *sigh* Juan Francisco de Coronado JFDC and Kobald quickly teamed up, dumping Glacier to the apron then knocking him to the floor. ELIMINATED: Glacier, by *sigh* Juan Francisco de Coronado and Kobald #30: Callux the Castigator Grizzly Redwood was quickly done in by the incoming member of the Proteus Wheel. ELIMINATED: Grizzly Redwood, by Callux the Castigator #31: Volgar #32: Frantik Professor Hugo Nicodemus set his charges to war, and the three of them quickly set to work. ELIMINATED: Kobald, by the Proteus Wheel #33: Danjerhawk No doubt spurred by the presumed loss of another comrade earlier in the evening, Danjer was quick in eliminating BLANK with a dropkick off the apron. ELIMINATED: BLANK, by Danjerhawk Meanwhile, the former Rumblebees clashed, and unfortunately Darling came up on the short end. ELIMINATED: Solo Darling, by Travis Huckabee Babish was soon targeted by the Proteus Wheel, prompting Calhoun and Leary to come to her aid, and the three stood together against the Wheel, overcoming them momentarily. Unfortunately... ELIMINATED: Blanche Babish, by the Proteus Wheel In the midst of the chaos, two unlikely heroes emerged against the threat, scoring a pair of shocking eliminations! ELIMINATED: Volgar, by Travis Huckabee and El Hijo del Ice Cream ELIMINATED: Callux the Castigator, by Travis Huckabee and El Hijo del Ice Cream And then Icarus ended Hijo’s dreams of another Golden Opportunity, and Huckabee couldn’t save himself either. ELIMINATED: El Hijo del Ice Cream, by Icarus ELIMINATED: Travis Huckabee, by Icarus It’s every man for himself in these types of matches, and that was quickly proven. ELIMINATED: Frantik, by Lucas Calhoun ELIMINATED: Jeremy Leary, by Lucas Calhoun Calhoun was not allowed to stick around for much longer, though, as this began a wave of eliminations. ELIMINATED: Lucas Calhoun, by Princess Kimberlee ELIMINATED: Icarus, by Princess Kimberlee ELIMINATED: Princess Kimberlee, by *sigh* Juan Francisco de Coronado Three men were left, and Danjer was the designated target, outlasting what both his opponents threw at him. JFDC then resorted to his usual tricks, hitting Dasher with a low blow before rolling him up. Apparently that’s legal in this match. Yeesh. ELIMINATED: Dasher Hatfield, by *sigh* Juan Francisco de Coronado Dasher, however, had a bit of a plan in mind. In a move straight out of the 1992 Royal Rumble, Dasher grabbed hold of JFDC’s arms from the floor, and a dropkick from Danjer sent him tumbling to the floor as well, leaving the rookie of the Hawx with the Golden Opportunity. ELIMINATED: *sigh* Juan Francisco de Coronado, by Danjerhawk w/Dasher Hatfield WINNER: Danjerhawk NOTE: Ursa Minor got lost somewhere in here. I’ve no idea when he was actually eliminated but he was. I’m assuming it was around Still Life’s elimination, though I don’t know for sure.

[yeonchi]

Kisekae Insights #2: The Doctors, Protags and Prototypes

These are the characters who form the core of the Kisekae Project. Of course, being a Doctor Who-inspired project, there is always the Doctor, but this Doctor is different from the Doctor you know on what I like to call BBC Doctor Who.

Introduction and origin story

Being the egotist I am, the other protagonist of the project is a character based on myself. He’s been through many incarnations under the same name, but in his final incarnation (shown above on the left), he prefers to be known as Hiroki Ichigo. He has a twin brother (on the right), who used to be known as Zhuge Liang, but for the latest revision of the Kisekae Project, prefers to be known as Parker Zhou. Imagine him as Sephiroth from Final Fantasy VII, but with black hair.

In my reviews of Resolution and The Timeless Children, I outlined my origin story for the Doctor and here, I will expand and elaborate on it. No, of course he’s not the Timeless Child.

During the Time War, the Time Lords were desperate for more soldiers and resurrecting their dead wasn’t enough for them. As such, Lord President Rassilon invented a virus, suspended in Mako energy, and spread it on Earth at some points in history. While the virus would have no effect on the infected, it would sometimes result in the souls of their offspring being harvested and transported to Gallifrey, where they would become new Time Lords. The human “shells” would be left with corrupted chromosomes and/or brain activity as a result. Other humans documented these genetic and neurodevelopmental disorders over the years, resulting in what we know today as disorders like Down syndrome and autism (though I should note that the Time Lords probably didn’t cause every disorder known to mankind).

At essentially the same time, the Shinra Electric Power Company worked on the Jenova Project, injecting a number of people with Jenova cells in the process. By chance, one of those people had a child with someone who was infected with Rassilon’s virus and also a twin that they were unaware about until its birth. Unfortunately, in the present-day view of the project, Shinra had already fallen and there are no plans for a “reunion theory”.

After the twins were born, they had to be taken to another hospital due to complications. In the middle of the night, the Time Lords were extracting the child’s soul (the other babies in the nursery were chanting an angelic prayer in the process) when the twin suddenly emitted a blast of Mako energy, causing everything to go silent. In reality, that soul was knocked out of the Time Vortex and landed on Gallifrey long before the Time War. That soul became the Time Lord who would be known as the Doctor. My backstory is that he was found by Omega and raised like any other Gallifreyan.

The child would later be diagnosed with autism. Uniquely, due to the Time Lord and Jenova DNA in him coupled with whatever remnant Mako energy there was (I dunno), the child also had the ability to regenerate, but it would create another body in the process and he was also susceptible to regenerating following emotional distress (like a broken heart or something, think Takotsubo cardiomyopathy). The child would keep on living as the “archetype”, while the new body created would take on a separate identity and live as a “prototype”. The process varies each time; either the child would regenerate into the prototype and the archetype (or real self) would manifest sometime later, or the child would regenerate into his next incarnation and the prototype would manifest later. As for the twin, well, everyone forgot about him because of the Time War, so he was put up for adoption as if he were an orphan. However, he did not share his brother’s regeneration abilities. In the story, they meet each other again and basically, all is well.

So now, let’s look at the different incarnations for the Doctor and the child. Now, both of them are subject to the 12-regeneration limit, but there are some points where more than one regeneration was used. There are a couple of exceptional circumstances regarding certain regenerations, which I will elaborate when I get to them.

The different incarnations of the Doctor

Remember that the Doctor in the Kisekae Project version of Doctor Who is different to the one you know from BBC Doctor Who. In this version, there are only five numbered incarnations of the Doctor, but by this point in time, he has used up all of his regenerations. The image of the five Doctors at the top of the page is only representative of each incarnation’s main counterparts; some Doctors may have influences from other Doctors. It should be noted that these versions of the Doctor look like children because they are played by children, with the exception of the Fifth as time passed.

First Doctor (1999-2003): Based off the BBC First, Third, Fourth and Seventh (for good measure) Doctors. This is interesting as I had two actors playing him due to “child labour laws” and as such, there are two stages to this Doctor. The first one played from the start of the series, showing his first adventure off Gallifrey, to his sentencing by the Time Lords for breaking their non-interference laws. The Doctor managed to escape his trial to farewell his companions, then had his TARDIS blown up. A regeneration was used up as a result. The second actor played the following episode to the end of this Doctor’s tenure. For most of that time, he was in exile on Earth and working for UNIT. He could technically be the 1.5 Doctor, but I prefer to just refer to him as the First Doctor, like his previous incarnation. The Doctor managed to fix his TARDIS and broke the terms of his exile, which led the Time Lords to search for him again. However, after the Doctor killed the Time Lords chasing him by tricking them into destroying a city, the Time Lords annulled his sentence and they left him alone. The First Doctor would regenerate into the Second Doctor either in his final story (which has now been retconned) or in his next story, the Doctor Who TV Movie.

Second Doctor (2003-2007): Based off the BBC Second, Fourth (for good measure), Sixth and Eighth Doctors. Originally, the Second Doctor directly regenerated into the Third Doctor, but because of the 50th Anniversary, it was retconned and he regenerated into the War Doctor.

War Doctor: Literally the same as the BBC War Doctor, down to the “played by John Hurt” bit. The War Doctor regenerated into the Third Doctor at the end of The Day of the Doctor and would forget what he did to end the Time War.

Third Doctor (2008-2009): Based off the BBC Ninth Doctor because we never skip Nine. Again, there were two actors playing the Doctor, but that was because the series changed stations (it’s a thing in my version). The second actor is the more commonly-known version of the Third Doctor, though the first actor did get to play him for a season, with influences from the Seventh and Eighth (for good measure) Doctors. This is the first Doctor where the series started spinning-on other franchises and implementing characters from them, with companions such as Fifi Forget-me-not and Angelina Mouseling (from Angelina Ballerina, in case you didn’t know). Like his counterpart with Rose Tyler, the Third Doctor regenerated into the Fourth Doctor after he took the Time Vortex into himself to save Fifi.

Fourth Doctor (2010-2012): Based off the BBC Tenth Doctor. This Doctor saw the start of the anime spin-ons as characters from Lucky Star, namely Konata, Minami, Misao, Kagami and Tsukasa, were featured as companions. Reimu Hakurei, along with Sonic, Tails and Amy Rose, were also companions of the Fourth Doctor. Towards the end of this Doctor’s tenure, a second actor had to come in and take over because the original actor was unavailable, though he managed to come back and film his regeneration scene. Oh yeah, the series changed back to its previous station. The second actor like playing this Doctor so much that he wanted to do it again, so he got a spin-off series to do so. That actor also played the next and final incarnation of the Doctor along with multiple other characters, including the other protagonist and his prototypes. If you haven’t got it already, that was basically me, and I was also the showrunner and main writer.

Fifth Doctor (2012-present): Based off the BBC Eleventh and Twelfth Doctors, along with influences from the BBC Fifth and Tenth Doctors. This is, of course, the current incarnation of the Doctor and there are no further incarnations, not even a female incarnation. Eventually, this incarnation became cemented as the Infinity Doctor, though I still prefer to call him the Fifth Doctor. When the Fourth Doctor regenerated into the Fifth Doctor in The End of Time, it also created two pony versions of himself, a pony version of the other protagonist (my self-insert if you didn’t know) and separated two or three people’s souls from him. This was due to some machinations from Yuki Nagato which the Fifth Doctor later cemented as timeline splits.

You know, funnily enough, Zhuge Liang would become the Doctor in an earlier prototype of my project. It’s just as well that I like making retcons here and there, despite what I preach about artistic integrity.

The three new ponies created as a result of the Fourth Doctor’s regeneration are as follows (images to be revealed later):

Jee Gun, an Earth pony counterpart of the other protagonist. After ending up on Equestria and living a pony’s life there, he would later regenerate into Storm Dasher, a Pegasus.

Doctor Whooves, based on the Fourth (BBC Tenth) Doctor. In his final adventure he would have a meta-crisis regeneration (leading to the Doctor Whooves/Time Turner living in Equestria) before regenerating into another incarnation based on the Fifth (BBC Eleventh) Doctor.

The Pony Doctor, based on the Fifth Doctor. Though left unmentioned in the story, the one regeneration he could have used was sacrificed to facilitate Doctor Whooves’ regeneration.

The different incarnations of the child

Now let’s take a look into the incarnations of the child, the other protagonist. Instead of whatever I just did up there, I can describe some aspects of each incarnation’s personality (not that it would really matter most of the time), adventures and love life (it’s a theme in my project). Oh, by the way, each incarnation looks the same most of the time; there have been some instances where an incarnation looks different to the norm.

First incarnation: Curious, yet impatient and had difficulty socialising due to his autism. If he found something he liked, he would play with it for a long time. He had a tendency to push or hurt people in his way, which his later incarnations would generalise as “he liked to kill people”. Macabre indeed. This incarnation regenerated on a trip to Hong Kong. His father wanted to take a photo of him and his mother with the Beatles wax figures at Madame Tussauds, but he, being the curious boy he was, was too busy playing with Paul McCartney’s hair to even look at the camera. His mother slapped him and threatened to leave him there. He became heartbroken and regenerated for the first time.

Second incarnation: Similar to his first incarnation, but he had a flirty side. He had crushes on a couple of girls; the first never resulted in a relationship because she became repulsed after hearing of his insubordination, while the second only resulted in a short marriage. He was also easily-manipulated by others, which was how he first learnt how to swear. This incarnation regenerated when the two girls he loved plotted to kill him and he was forced to commit suicide at Honnōji to avoid being captured.

Third (2.5) incarnation: Following his regeneration, he managed to metamorphosise his remaining regeneration energy into ice, making him into a being similar to Elsa from Frozen, calling himself the Ice King. This incarnation was vengeful and strategic, with his only purpose being to take his revenge on the girls who plotted to kill him. He almost succeeded, but he died before he could fully exact his revenge. The ice powers changed back into regeneration energy, allowing him to regenerate again without using another regeneration.

Fourth incarnation: Though he was feisty, destructive and brooding, he began to mellow upon meeting Fifi Forget-me-not, who would later become his wife. He fought in a resistance army, but in a manner similar to The Night of the Doctor, he died after he failed to save someone from a missile attack. He was revived by the Sisterhood of Karn (might get into that sometime), who convinced him to regenerate into a warrior.

Fifth incarnation: One of the longer-lasting incarnations. Despite his warrior’s nature, he had a friendly and romantic side with him as he lived with Fifi for a number of years. When she and her friends had to go back to Flowertot Garden (as it was being assimilated into Never Land), the two parted ways. He later fell in love with another girl who would later become Akari Ichigo, but it would be some time before they got married. After having his heart broken by another girl, he regenerated into his next incarnation.

Sixth incarnation: Mellow and romantic, yet assertive when he needed to be. This was the incarnation where he started a relationship with Akari, but it would lead to his demise at the hands of her cousins who opposed the relationship. After using up a regeneration in a meta-crisis to save himself, Akari helped him regenerate into his next incarnation with a kiss (this was the proposal as well). This would mix up their DNA, resulting in subsequent prototypes being considered the offspring of the two rather than his siblings.

Eighth incarnation (skipped one because meta-crisis): Cheery and spirited with a case of wanderlust and a sense of nostalgia. He took Akari to visit people and places, both old and new in his life. His demise came at the hands of his parents, who were tipped off about his relationship with Akari. Following a Christmas Carol-esque nostalgia trip, he gets locked up in his room where he regenerates. There isn’t a lot to his ninth incarnation because he uses up three more of his regenerations trying to save his twin brother, Zhuge Liang, from the Voidstation. We’re up to 10 regenerations used up at this point. Oh, and he became a magical boy as well and scattered himself through his timeline. It’s complicated. I’ll explain later.

Twelfth incarnation (see previous): Similar to his eighth incarnation, but with a wanderlust for time travel. The Pony Doctor lent him his TARDIS for a while, but he stopped upon hearing that one of his old friends had died. He married Akari, but they barely got to start their new life when he was killed by Girl Power. He would regenerate into a female incarnation after accepting a deal from Walpurgisnacht.

Thirteenth incarnation: This was a female incarnation, played by Tavia Yeung and based on her character, Apple Lam Chung-yan (林頌恩) from the 2013 TVB drama A Great Way to Care II (仁心解碼II). This was the first incarnation who would have a different name from the original, having taken up the name of Momoka Mizutani (水谷桃花/ももか) to avoid suspicion from her enemies. Like the Ice King, Momoka was bent on revenge. With Akari being taken from her previous incarnation, brainwashed and placed in a family with his prototype and a Progenitor-created child, Momoka manipulated the family into visiting her restaurant so she can get closer to them. Unfortunately, her plans were sabotaged and she was killed in the process. To be honest, casting Tavia Yeung was a bit meh on my part because of her English skills. I was going to replace her with Dodo Cheng as an older Momoka, but I decided that it wasn’t worth it.

Fourteenth incarnation: Same as the thirteenth incarnation, but with Walpurgisnacht taking further control of Momoka. She became more vengeful to the point of killing people who had wronged her in her previous incarnations. This causes her to suffer from a traumatic post-regeneration crisis, where she became somewhat psychotic. After being convinced by Zhuge Liang and Violet to give hope to others in need, she commits suicide after coming to peace with the fact that she wouldn’t have a chance with Akari. Little did she know what fate would have in store for her. Momoka would survive a shot in the head for a while and join her previous incarnations (except the Ice King) in freeing Akari from her brainwashing. The original version of the story has Momoka regenerate directly into her next incarnation, but the final version (having been revised some time after The Time of the Doctor premiered) has Momoka reset to her previous male incarnation to see Akari for the final time before regenerating to his next and final incarnation.

Fifteenth incarnation: This is the incarnation that cemented Hiroki and Akari’s names into the story as they would be known by those names from that point on. Hiroki also gave himself a makeover as part of this, leading to him basically cosplaying Hanbei Takenaka from Samurai Warriors 3 and 4, at least for the Next Gen Series. During that series, Hiroki shared some personality traits from all his previous incarnations, making him a happy-go-lucky boy with a dark side that sometimes overcomes him and makes him irrational. He is also attached to Akari because she is the only person who can control his dark side (actually, she acts as more of a crutch). In the Moushouden Series, where he becomes Kamen Rider Decade, Hiroki learns to accept and control his dark side, becoming a calmer and more enlightened, yet still enigmatic person. At this point, he’s essentially like Tsukasa Kadoya.

The different prototypes

As I stated, with each of the other protagonist’s regenerations comes a new prototype. A couple of them are based off the incarnations from which they regenerated and a few of them are literally anime characters. Some of them may have had different names in the past, but the names listed here are the names they are now known by. You might also recognise those names from the Waifu Network Tumblr.

Prototypes are listed in order of regeneration.

Richard Yang (楊子深)

Zhuge Qiao (諸葛喬)/Hayato Kisaichi (私市颯人)

Natsuki Takara (高良夏希)

Kyōko Izumi (泉京子)

Takumi Kamijō (上条拓海)

Kumiko Hayashi (林久美子)

Yamato Kurosawa (黒沢大和)

Daichi Kurosawa (黒沢大地)/Nagi Kurosawa (黒沢凪)/Marco Wong (黃翔希)

Kyōya Shinomiya (四ノ宮京夜)

Momoka Mizutani (水谷桃花)

With the exception of the Kurosawa siblings, who went off and did their own thing, the prototypes formed a family with the two protagonists, thereby known as the Zhuge family. There were also others in the family who became members not by virtue of regeneration, but by the privilege of being close friends to them.

Zhuge Shu (諸葛虪)

Katsuki Hiiragi (柊克樹)

Kai Hirasawa (平沢海)

Terry Mizukoshi (水越テリー)

Kasumi Shinomiya (四ノ宮霞)

[delusionalcandycane]

So you and devil were close?Would you be okay with telling us another story of the time you two shared?

“Oh of course. Hmm. Oh I know a story. Grab a blanket and get cozy. This might be a long one” Chariot stands up and walks over to get a little bell and sits down again.Chariot clears his throat“Okay so this story is from a while back, when I happen upon a litter of kittens. Unsure on how to take care of them I showed them to Devil. He is usually this big tough guy and all, but the kittens melted his heart. He then asked me.

“So what did you name them?”“Oh, um well I didn’t really think of anything” 

He then held up a kitten and asked me how many there were.

“Uhh, one, two…five..eight. Nine! There are nine of them”

Devil took a moment before pointing to one kitten at a time.

“That one can be Dasher.The little one there is Dancer.That’s Prancer, Vixen Can be the little one white spot on their ear.Comet and Cupid for the two white ones Donner is the one that is sleeping. Blitzen is the bright orange one.  Did I forget any?

♫ But do you recall, the most famous reindeer of all ♫

“Are you singing now?”

Chariot just laughs and continues to sing and picks up the little unnamed kitten.

♫Rudolph the Red-Nosed ReindeerHad a very shiny nose♫

And boops devil’s nose with the kitten

Boop boop

“Chariot please”

♫And if you ever saw itYou would even say it glows♫

Boop Boop

”Chariot I swear”

♫All of the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names♫

Boop Boop“Okay Chariot, we are naming it it Rudolph, now stop booping my nose”“Nope, Boop” Chariot says booping Devil’s nose with his finger

“And after that i started booping his nose every time I saw him.”

[dahersgetontheclock]

Last Main chapter of Dasher's Nine to five arc one has been published on Ao3 today. We Are Very Proud to show you all what we have in store for the future but I think it's time for an interlude. https://archiveofourown.org/works/45508222/chapters/126734134

[dexo27]

Day 9 Of 12 - 🎵Nine Kentro's Clashing 🎵

🎵On the Ninth day of Christmas Ingen gave to we, Nine Kentro's Clashing, Eight Oviraptors Roaring, Seven Oloro's Prancing, Six Cryo's Chilling Five Golden Spines! Four Styxo's Swimming, Three Frecnh Raptors, Two Ankylo's Cuddlin' and a Quetzalcoatlus in an Aviary! 🎵

Day 9 had to be named after Ol' Saint Nick's reindeer, and our herd of new-model Kentrosaurus, courtesy of the new update, fit quite well as them.

In order, starting with Pic 2 is Dasher (Sonoran Dessert/Lithobates), Dancer (Gambia River Basin/Rana), Prancer (Yukon River/Pulchrana), Vixen (Sonoran Desert/Chalcorna), Comet (Qilian Mountains/Rana), Cupid (Limpopo River/Chalcorna), Donner (MangroveForest/Lithobates) and Blitzen (Amazon Rainforest/Papurana) and Rudolph (Pierce Skin).

Ooh boy we are getting near to the end of our little challenge here, huh? Welp, feel free to try guess tomorrow's dinosaur and leave and name suggestions, as I'm starting to run out of ideas 😅

[lgrwclapclap]

There Will Be Blood

I didn’t know my face was caved in, but I knew it wasn’t good.

I knew it wasn’t good from the sound my cheek had made when it hit the dasher above the boards. I knew it wasn’t good because the referee had blown his whistle so quickly. I knew it wasn’t good because our trainer, John Wharton, had jumped over the boards right away to check on me.

I saw the blood on the ice, but I didn’t know the right side of my face was caved in.

My only thought was, O.K., this is a bad one. How many stitches?

It was Game 6 of the ’96 Western Conference finals against the Colorado Avalanche. We had to win the game in their barn to keep the series alive. The whole series was a bloodbath. To say “there was no love lost” between us would be an understatement. I rarely ever use the word “hate,” but I’ll use it here. We hated them. They hated us. That’s just the way it was.

Moments before, I had collected the puck along the boards and made a pass, and I was drifting backwards right by our bench. The next thing I knew, I got hit from behind. I felt my face hit the top of the boards. Everything went black for a second. I was on all fours, trying to get up, but I couldn’t.

I looked up at our trainer and he was blurry, but I could see this look of horror on his face. I’ll never forget that look. He put a towel over my head to hide my injuries. The last thing I remember is him and Keith Primeau helping me to my feet and escorting me off the ice to the dressing room.

Then I blacked out.

The next thing I remember is waking up in the dressing room, and looking up at our trainers and our doctor, and finally feeling the pain. 

Then I blacked out again.

The next time I came to, I sat up and the pain was gone. I didn’t know it, but I was on some serious painkillers. So I started trying to put on my shoulder pads so I could get back on the ice.

Our team doc said, “Kris, what the hell are you doing?”

I said, “What period is it? Am I stitched up?”

He said, “Uh … Kris, you better take a look at this.”

And he walked me over to the mirror.

The right side of my face was caved in.

He told me the damage: Broken orbital bone. Broken cheekbone. Broken nose. Broken jaw.

That was not the worst news.

I asked, “What’s the score?”

“It’s 4–1. Colorado.”

O.K.

Then I asked, “Who hit me?”

“Lemieux.”

March, 26, 1997.

Say the date to anybody in Detroit or Colorado and they’ll know exactly what you mean.

March, 26, 1997.

Exactly 301 days after I broke my face.

It’s hard to believe that it was 20 years ago this month. But if I just tell you the story of that brawl, it won’t do it justice. A 21-year-old reading this right now was just a baby when it happened. If they’ve only seen the YouTube videos, they probably think we were all a bunch of animals. But the reason things got so out of hand on March 26, 1997, is because of everything that happened before and after that brawl.

See, we have to go back.

Everybody involved in that fight had a story. For me, you have to go back to Career Day when I was in sixth grade in West Hill, Ontario. The teacher went around the room and asked every kid what they wanted to be when they grew up.

Doctor. Lawyer. Teacher. Veterinarian.

Everybody smiled and nodded.

When it was my turn to go, I said, “I’m going to play in the NHL.”

I was a small kid, so there was some laughter in the room. After school was over, I was sitting outside on the portable step, and I’ll never forget this as long as I live: This kid (who shall remain nameless), came up to me and said, “Ha! You’ll never play in the NHL.”

Just the way he said it, with such certainty, always stuck with me. I used it as motivation. I’d picture his face, and just the way he said it, and I’d think, Oh yeah? I’ll show you.

My mentality was that I was going to do whatever it took to make it to the NHL, and for the first few years of my career, it was a real struggle. I spent four years in the Winnipeg Jets’ system, mostly toiling away in the minors before they traded me to the Red Wings in ’93, just as Scotty Bowman was taking over as head coach.

So one night I’m playing for the Adirondack Red Wings in the AHL, and I score a hat trick. I come out of the locker room after the game, and there’s Scotty with a few Red Wings scouts. I had no idea they were in the building.

I’m thinking, Finally, they saw the hat trick. Now they know what I can do. Now I’ll get my chance.

The first thing Scotty says to me is, “Do you know how many face-offs you won tonight?”

Face-offs were just starting to be kept as an official stat, especially in the AHL.

So I said, “No, sir, I’m not really sure.”

Scotty said, “You won 19 of 21. Can you do that in the National Hockey League?”

Six weeks later, I got called up to the Detroit Red Wings. The implication was pretty clear. If I wanted to be one of Scotty’s guys, I had to grind. I was 5′ 10″, 180 pounds and I was joining a team with unbelievable skill guys — Sergei Fedorov, Steve Yzerman, Slava Kozlov, Keith Primeau, Vladimir Konstantinov, Paul Coffey, and a young Nick Lidström. So my mindset was that I was going to be the biggest pain in the ass you ever played against. I definitely knew my place. But I didn’t know my exact value until we played the Sharks in the ’94 playoffs. After we beat them in Game 3, I was getting interviewed by a reporter from a San Jose newspaper. After he finished up, he turned to me and said, “Hey, not bad for a kid who was traded for a dollar, huh?”

And he started to walk away.

I said, “Excuse me … what did you just say?”

He said, “Yeah, a dollar. Winnipeg traded you for a buck. Now you’re playing in the Stanley Cup playoffs. Pretty good … Wait, you don’t know the story?”

I turned and looked at our public relations guy, totally confused.

He said, “Uh, yeah, Kris. It’s true.”

I’m like, “What? I was traded for future considerations.”

He says, “Yeah, well, you know, when Scotty called you up from the AHL, they still hadn’t worked out the considerations, officially. So Bryan Murray called Mike Smith and … well … you were traded for cash considerations.”

“A buck?”

“A buck.”

Whenever somebody tells me I was traded for a bag of pucks, I have to politely correct them — because a bag of pucks would’ve been a lot more expensive. But I loved it, because the whole story just added to my underdog mentality.

We ended up losing that first-round series to the Sharks in seven games, which was bitterly disappointing. Then in ’95, we felt like we were so close to the promised land, but we got swept by the Devils in the Stanley Cup finals. That’s when the questions started.

A lot of people don’t remember this now, but at the time, we were getting a tremendous amount of heat for not being tough enough to win a Cup. The media was questioning the leadership of guys like Yzerman and Fedorov, if you can believe that. They were questioning the way our whole team was built. The implication was that we were skilled but soft.

So we came out in ’95–96 with a gigantic collective chip on our shoulders. The first two months of the season, we were on fire. With our speed and skill, we overwhelmed teams. Then, on December 2, 1995, we went into the old Montreal Forum to play Patrick Roy and the Canadiens. That night, something happened that changed hockey forever.

We came out hot. Roy let in four goals, then five, then six….

For whatever reason, they wouldn’t pull him.

Seven. Eight. They still wouldn’t pull him.

We were all kind of looking at each other on the bench like, What’s the deal here?

At one point, the crowd did a mock cheer when Roy made a save. It was ridiculous, because he was such an incredible goalie.

Finally, after nine goals, Roy had had enough and just pulled himself. Later on, it came out in the press that when Roy got back to the bench, he turned to the president of the Canadiens and said, “This is my last game in Montreal.”

Roy was traded to the Avalanche a few days later. That was the moment when the whole rivalry between us and Colorado got its spark. He never forgot what we did to him at the Forum. From that moment on, he took it to another level when he played us.

It felt like destiny that we would have to go through Colorado in the playoffs that season. And, wouldn’t you know it, who was waiting for us in the ’96 Western Conference finals? Roy and the Avalanche.

This is the part of the story where things get a little crazy.

Most people think that the feud started when I broke my face in Game 6. But it started way before that. From the first drop of the puck of Game 1, guys were taking runs, slashing, grabbing, sucker punching, you name it. There’s no point in even going over every incident. We did stuff. They did stuff. If you played in the NHL playoffs back then, you were not coming out unscatched. I’m not glorifying it, but that was the way it was.

Early in Game 3, Slava Kozlov rammed Adam Foote’s head into the glass and cut him pretty good. Later on in the period, Claude Lemieux snuck up behind Slava and sucker punched him in the back of the head to get revenge.

Our bench went crazy. And then the whole game went crazy. And then the whole series went crazy. Everything turned into a battle. We were battling over loose sticks from the benches.

Game 3 was the moment when the rivalry rose to another level entirely. We wanted to win that series so, so bad. Colorado was not a team full of goons. That’s the thing. They were an unbelievable team that had everything you could want — pure skill with Sakic and Forsberg, grit and experience with Lemieux, Kamensky and Ricci. And, of course, they also had Roy.

They had everything we had. They were a tremendous team, and we didn’t like them one bit.

So when I looked in the mirror after I got hit from behind in Game 6, and I saw my broken face, I was kind of numb.

But when the trainers told me that Colorado had won, and that the series was over….

I was beside myself. I was so disappointed.

The doctors advised me to stay in Colorado to have surgery right away, but I wanted to be on the plane with the guys. I wanted to be back in Detroit. So I draped a towel over my head and walked out of the building, and I got on the plane and waited for the guys.

My teammates didn’t actually know how bad my injuries were until they got on the plane and saw me. So they had gone through the whole handshake line not knowing my face was caved in. That’s the backstory for Dino Ciccarelli’s famous quote about Lemieux: “I can’t believe I shook this guy’s friggin’ hand after the game. That pisses me right off.”

I still remember sitting at the front of that plane with the doctors, and all my teammates getting on and tapping me on the shoulder and telling me it was going to be alright.

When we got back to Detroit, I was in the hospital for four days. I couldn’t eat solid food for six weeks because my jaw had to be wired shut. Having your jaw wired shut sucks, but it sucked even more in 1996 because they didn’t have all the protein shakes and fancy smoothies in every store like they have today. For the most part, I was drinking Ensure. Sometimes I got lucky and they’d let me have a chocolate milk shake.

I wish this story could have Smell-O-Vision, because if you could only smell a vanilla Ensure right now, you’d know how miserable I really was. But the worst pain, by far, was knowing that the Avalanche were dominating the Panthers in the Stanley Cup finals.

I couldn’t stand to watch. It’s still the only Stanley Cup finals that I’ve never seen a single second of.

As I was sitting in that hospital bed, I promised myself two things:

I wasn’t going to let the hit affect me mentally.  

It wasn’t to change the way I played.

You have to understand what hockey means to me. It was always my joy in life. I was a small guy to start with, and I made it to the NHL by playing a certain way. If I took my foot off the gas even just a little bit … if I was even just a little bit timid because of that hit, I wouldn’t be effective. I’d be letting my teammates down. I’d be letting the city down. The people of Detroit were in my corner every single day of my recovery. I mean, the response from fans was so overwhelming that I had to get two hospital rooms: One for me, and one to store all the flowers, cards, and stuffed animals that people sent to me. There was so much that I couldn’t take it all home. I donated all the stuffed animals to the pediatric ward.

Detroit is such a blue-collar town, and they love their Red Wings so much.

We had to get back to the Western Conference finals. We had to beat Colorado. We had to win a Stanley Cup.

I would close my eyes and picture the weight room and think, Soon.

As I was leaving the hospital, my doctor gave me a pair of pliers.

“Keep these on you at all times,” he said. “Whenever you leave the house. Whenever you go to bed.”

I couldn’t speak. I just shook my head, confused.

“If you get sick and have to throw up, you’re going to have to cut the wires to keep from choking.”

So I went home with my pliers and my cases of Ensure. It was a long road. I ended up losing almost 20 pounds over the six weeks that my jaw was wired shut.

I’ll never forget the day they came off. My first meal was at Andiamo on the riverfront in Detroit. I ordered the angel-hair pasta. But I still had to have these restrictive bands on my teeth, so I sat there eating it noodle by noodle for like an hour. My friends were on dessert by the time I made it to the 10th noodle, but it was the best feeling ever.

That was the end of June. I had two months to gain 20 pounds back before camp. Whenever I needed motivation to drink an Ensure, I’d just think of The Joe on opening night, and the feeling of walking down the dark tunnel and taking that first step onto the ice.

To be 100% honest, I rarely thought of getting revenge on Lemieux. It wasn’t about that. Unfortunately, Detroit did not feel the same way. It was like the entire city took the hit personally. When the season started, and I was back in the lineup, all anybody wanted to talk about was our first game against Colorado. But, as fate would have it, Lemieux wasn’t in the lineup for our first two games. The third game in Colorado got very heated — you could feel the tension — but the referees were on top of it. Nothing major happened. But you could feel the hatred building and building….

Right up until March 26, 1997.

When it all exploded at The Joe.

I pulled into the parking lot of the arena that night and a TV cameraman followed me from my car to our dressing room. Camera guys never followed me. They’d always follow Yzerman or Fedorov. That’s when I knew: O.K. Here we go.

You could feel it in the dressing room before the game. You could feel it during warmups. They were 3–0 against us that season. They were No. 1 in the division. This was our last game against them going into the playoffs. It was a huge moment.

But the game was relatively tame for most of the first period. Until….

Igor Larionov and Peter Forsberg, two of the most skilled guys in the league, got into a wrestling match by our bench. At first it was nothing — just a small scuffle. The refs came over to break it up. The building was quiet.

And then you just heard this incredible roar out of nowhere.

I look to center ice, and there’s Mac.

Darren McCarty, the guy who visited me in the hospital every day. Mac is reigning punches down on Claude Lemieux right in front of our bench. Lemieux’s helmet pops off, and he goes down on all fours, trying to turtle to protect himself.  

And then another huge roar — louder than the first one.

Patrick Roy leaves his net. Mike Vernon leaves his net.

They’re skating toward one another from across the rink, like a Wild West movie.

But then, out of nowhere, Brendan Shanahan intercepts Roy and they both go flying.

Next thing I know, Mac is dragging Lemieux over to our bench, as if to say, I told you I’d get him, boys.

Then Vernon and Roy finally make it to one another, and they start brawling at center ice. Not just tying up, but throwing haymakers.

In the middle of all this pandemonium, Marc Crawford, the Avs coach, is yelling at me, “You started all this, Draper!”

And then Scotty Bowman starts yelling at Crawford, “Don’t talk to my players! Don’t you ever talk to my players!”

When the refs finally got ahold of everybody, there were helmets and sticks and gloves and jerseys and blood all over the ice.

What can you say? You just say the date, and everybody knows.

March 26, 1997.

Exactly 301 days after I had my face caved in, my teammates stood up for me. We settled it. But this is what a lot of people don’t remember: For the players on the ice, that night wasn’t just about the fight. That night was about proving that we could beat Colorado on the scoreboard.

After the refs cleaned up the ice, there was still a game to be played. We were down 5–3 in the third. If we lost, and Colorado swept the season series, then the fight would have meant nothing. But we started chipping away at their lead, and we tied it up at 5–5 to send it to overtime. In OT, who do you think came out and buried the game-winning goal?

Darren McCarty.

We couldn’t have scripted it any better.

The brawl was one thing. But us winning that night changed everything. It gave us the belief that we could beat them in the playoffs. We knew we’d see them again in the Western Conference finals. We just knew.

When they dropped the puck in that series, the tone had already been set. The vibe was different. As soon as Lemieux turtled at The Joe, everything changed.

We beat them in six games, and I got what I really wanted — what I had burned for since I was in the hospital. I got the handshake line. I got to look every one of them dead in the eyes, and I got to shake their hands knowing that I was going to the Stanley Cup finals, and they weren’t.

In the finals, the Flyers were heavily favored to beat us. They were “too big, too strong, too fast.”

First shift. Game 1. Philly comes out with the LEGION OF DOOM. Lindros. LeClair. Renberg.

Everyone expects that.

But nobody expected who Scotty sends out.

The Grind Line.

Me, Joe Kocur and Kirk Maltby.

What a feeling. Almost exactly a year to the day that I was laying in a hospital bed with my jaw wired shut. Now I’m starting Game 1 of the Stanley Cup finals.

We came out flying. After finally beating Colorado, we were not going to be denied. We took Game 1 on our way to a sweep.

That first time you touch Lord Stanley, after so many years of burning for it, your life flashes before your eyes. Your whole journey plays like a quick film in your mind. I wanted that Cup so bad, for so many reasons. But mostly I wanted to prove to myself that one hit wasn’t going to define my career, or change the love I had for the game.

We won again in ’98, 2002, and 2008.

Now, we’re known as champions. But on March 25, 1997, we were called “soft.” Our leadership was questioned. Some people wanted to blow up the team.

Do we still win the Stanley Cup without that brawl? Maybe. But I know that it certainly didn’t hurt.

Over the years, Lemieux and I never spoke about what happened. He never apologized, and I didn’t need him to. They won Cups. We won Cups. Even if I didn’t like him very much, I actually respected how clutch he was as a player.

Then, a couple of years ago, I was at the 2014 NHL draft as a member of the Red Wings’ front office. My whole family was there with me — my wife and three kids. When the draft was over, we were waiting outside for a taxi to take us to the airport, when my wife’s face suddenly went pale. She was looking right through me.

She said, “Lemieux’s walking towards us.”

I wasn’t going to turn around. I didn’t think I had anything to say to him.

Sure enough, I feel a hand on my shoulder. I turn around and it’s Claude.

He says, “Oh, is this your family?”

My son, Kienan, has watched every single YouTube video in existance of the Wings-Avalanche rivalry. He knows the whole story. So he was looking up at Claude with these big eyes, like, Oh, my God. Here he is, in real life.

Claude bent down and shook his hand, and my son just kind of looked at him in awe. Claude politely introduced himself to my whole family, and shook everybody’s hand.

And that was it. We went our separate ways.

I’m glad we had that moment. For everything that we went through during that rivalry, the beauty of our game is that at the end of the day, as (much older) men, we are still able to shake hands.

Now that it’s the final year for The Joe, people have been talking about their favorite memories of the place. We won two Stanley Cups in that building, and yet every time I meet a Wings fan, you know what they want to talk about?

March 26, 1997.

Those gongshow days are gone now, and it’s probably for the betterment of the game. But ask anybody from Detroit, and they can tell you exactly where they were when that brawl went down. Long after that arena is torn down, people will still remember that night.

It defined a rivalry, and it defined my career for a lot of fans.

But for me, when people ask about my favorite memories of The Joe, I always give a boring answer. And I do it because it’s the truth: It’s the Stanley Cups. The sacrifice it takes to lift one Stanley Cup is almost beyond words.

I went on to win four of them with teammates who I consider brothers. They can never take that away from us.

So, to a certain sixth grader in West Hill, Ontario, from a very long time ago, I’ll say it again: Oh yeah?

KRIS DRAPER  RETIRED / DETROIT RED WINGS 

[8livescatrescue]

As the photos of the A Team in their new homes began to come in, so did the requests for help with other cats and kittens.

aric & archie

ailbhe & alix

With the rest of the family gone, we didn’t want to leave little Alice & Arnold on their own in their bedroom.  It felt important to give them more opportunity to socialise and gain their confidence … and to be honest …. we needed their room!

So they packed their bags and moved downstairs.   It was scary at first and they were happy to hide in a large dog crate.  Uncle Henderson did his best to reassure them … but they weren’t convinced.   Surprisingly quickly though things started to change.   Arnold realised that if he could stay with his fear of being touched he actually really loved a tummy rub …. he simultaneously found his purr.

Alice has starting thinking of her future … and has decided that hair styling is her thing.  She’s certainly keen …. I’ll give her that …. she spends ages sitting on the back of the sofa, purring loudly and grooming me.  I’m kind of hoping she’ll refine her technique and not cause quite so much pain to future clients.

hair by alice

One of the main factors in making things better for these little ones is ‘uncle’ Dasher. It’s a bit of a delicate situation. You may remember that Dasher has been with us a while, waiting to find a pal to go to a new home with. He’s now found the love of his life in Alice … but she’s attached to her brother too. Arnold is also attached to Dasher … though not so much. He’s being very sweet and generous as this awkward love triangle plays itself out.

dasher

with

his

kittens

Anyway … I digress. A couple of days before Ailbhe & Alix went off to their new home, we had a message asking if we could take in 25 cats from one home! We said we couldn’t possibly take that many but had a pregnant cat/nursing cat space and/or room for a group of kittens. We were a bit shocked by the reply which said that there was a heavily pregnant cat, two mums nursing 7 kittens between them and 4 five month old kittens. It was one of those rushed-in-between-appointments-at-work kind of email exchanges. We couldn’t take them all … and were aware that even then these were only 14 of the 25. It’s the nightmare game of Lifeboat that rescues are regularly asked to play. Pregnant cat v mums with young kittens v older kittens who may be pregnant soon. We agreed to take pregnant puss, plus the two mums with their 7 kits … but then started trying to get help for the others.

alice & arnold much more confident

On the day of their arrival I was up by 6am cleaning and getting the space ready.  Ten new arrivals was daunting …. we never had such a big intake of cats. Sure … Ailbhe and 7 kittens arrived a few weeks ago … that was 8. Years and years ago when we were fostering for another rescue, on one day we took in a mum with 5 kittens 3 days old, and another mum with 4 kittens a day old. Yes … I know … that makes 11 … but at the time we just had two or three other cats in the house, and 9 of the arrivals were very tiny. The recent ten were coming to add to a household of nine. And of course one of the ten had several more small cats inside her.

We took a deep breath … what else can you do? Drove up the motorway in the pouring rain, and yet again suffered the misery of sat nav crashing off the dashboard. Seriously … WTF! … how does anyone stop the suicidal plummet of sat nav mid journey? And finally arrived at the house. It was a strange experience. It’s rare (acutally never … unless I visit a bigger cat rescue) that I go somewhere that has more cats than we have here. A real insight into how friends/ neighbours/ tradespeople might view my own home … a cat on every surface … mega size food boxes piled high. This owner clearly cared about their cats … but sadly hadn’t been able to get them neutered before they multiplied exponentially.

We got the carriers loaded up … Carrier 1: Jette the pregnant puss. Carrier 2: Squiggle plus 4 kits Carrier 3: Raven plus 3 kits. It’s not exactly a fair share. We understand that Raven gave birth to 5 kits, and a few days later Squiggle had 2. It seems that Squiggle has taken them all on as her own while Raven has stepped back .. other than a few bath times. At their vet check we found that Raven has very little milk whilst Squiggle is full of it. What we’ll never know is whether Squig took over because Raven had no milk, or whether Raven has no milk because Squiggle is feeding them all. Perhaps what matters most is that its one big happy family.

Here they are arriving in their rooms and starting to settle in

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Kitten Season! part 1 As the photos of the A Team in their new homes began to come in, so did the requests for help with other cats and kittens.

[pwchronicle]

Chikara “The Infinite Gauntlet” Live Show Report May 11th in Philadelphia, PA

This was my first Chikara event since “Once Upon a Beginning” in Jersey City last month, which featured Sidney Bakabella return to the promotion as the new Director of Fun, as well as Dasher Hatfield defeat Mr. Touchdown in the best Ladder Match of the week to become the undisputed Grand Champion of Chikara. This was also my first event back in the Wrestle Factory since March. A very full crowd with a number of new fans coming in.

1. Still Life With Apricots and Pears beat Thief Ant to retain the Young Lions Cup with their Venus de Milo leg lock. It started with Still Life requesting referee Kris Levin to position the Young Lions Cup (now sporting a bouquet of flowers while in Still Life’s possession) on the entrance stage for the cameras. As Levin obliged, Still Life chop blocked Thief Ant’s knee before the opening bell, establishing Still Life as the heel after they received a warm reception during their entrance. Still Life continued working over Thief Ant’s knee, applying a figure four that Thief Ant was able to reverse. A little later Thief Ant used a figure four as well, but Still Life got to the ropes. The finish came out of Still Life throwing the Cup into Thief Ant’s hands, followed by Still Life hitting a bulldog amidst the confusion. Solid opener.

2. Lucas Calhoun & Stray Kat beat Travis Huckabee & Icarus when Calhoun pinned Icarus following a back suplex from a powerslam position following a kick from Kat. Allie Kat is now based on the East Coast, and she has started working in Chikara more with a modified name and black gear to mesh better with new partner Calhoun. Huckabee came out with his Campeonato de Parejas (his co-campeon Tony Deppen was absent, having popped up in PWG the previous night), and Icarus came out in a loud shirt, claiming to be on vacation and just acting especially sleazy. Kat wanted each of them to scratch her belly. When Icarus removed his shirt, Kat scratched his back twice to his displeasure. The match had some clunky moments but overcame them. Kat was able to survive a pedigree, and when Icarus went to hit a shiranui on Kat, Calhoun caught him on his shoulder to set up the finish. This was Calhoun & Kat’s second point towards a title shot.

3. Der Wildebeest (w/ Jakob Hammermeier) beat Missile Assault Man with a running cross body. Hammermeier is back in Chikara, with a new hair cut and a new monster to do his bidding in Der Wildebeest, a wide masked man with a thick beard, tattoos, furry gear, and no shoes. Hammermeier handled the ring announcing for him (his role for the BDK when he first appeared nine years ago), but did both that and corner his new monster while in his wrestling gear. He did a lot of talking and interfering during the match. At one point Wildebeest plowed Missile Assault Man over the top rope, and he had two front row fans help him back into the ring before he could get counted out. Towards the end, Jakob got on the edge of the ring to instruct Wildebeest to give Missile Assault Man a death valley driver, but Missile Assault Man slipped out and booted Jakob off the ring, only to lose right afterward. Jakob then kicked him low and hid behind Wildebeest as they left to the back. I can totally get behind Jakob being back.

4. The Colony (Fire Ant & Thief Ant) beat The Creatures of the Deep (Merlok & Cajun Crawdad) after they hit Merlok with a spiked Beach Break. My favorite match of the undercard. The ants worked together early on, only for Merlok to take them both down with a pounce when they attempted Ants Marching on Crawdad. Merlok showed off his power early, hitting a corner cannonball on both ants while one of them was on his shoulders. He and Crawdad hit Fire Ant with an Emerald Frosion/top rope double stomp for only a nearfall, with Green Ant making the save. They also set up a spot that was very well executed, with Crawdad attempting a springboard move into the ring, only to be taken out by Green Ant hitting a dropkick off the ropes. Even after this hard-fought victory, Merlok and Crawdad still attacked the Colony afterward, even forcing the ref to count a pin on Fire Ant, just so Crawdad could celebrate as if he actually won.

- Intermission.

5. Ophidian won the Infinite Gauntlet Match to win a Golden Opportunity. This match made up the remainder of the event, nearly lasting a full hour. Thirty-three wrestlers, starting with two in the ring and a new entrant coming out every eighty-eight seconds (though there were hiccups with the countdown screen and entry sound effects early on before they were sorted out) Eliminations occurred via pinfall, submission, or being thrown over the top rope with both feet hitting the floor (this match predates MLW’s Battle Riot, having started in 2016). The order of entry was:

1. Boomer Hatfield 2. Danjerhawk 3. Sonny Defarge 4. Dasher Hatfield, rocking the gold mask he debuted in Jersey City 5. Ice Cream Jr. 6. Nytehawk 7. Kobald 8. Frantik 9. Fireman’s Carry Fry, the first of five enhancement wrestlers in this match 10. Cornelius Crummels 11. BLANK 12. Molly McCoy, a debuting student who came out in hockey gear and wrestled in Flyers colors 13. Volgar 14. Snapmare Matt 15. John Francis of Coronado, now waving the American flag and decked out in stars and stripes, including his bow tie 16. Armbreaker Amir 17. Worker Ant 18. Rick Roland 19. Officer Warren Barksdale 20. The Whisper 21. Jawbreaker Josue 22. Oleg the Usurper 23. Bull James, formerly of NXT 24. Unsocial Jordan, an Australian wrestler 25. Enzuigiri Evan 26. Hermit Crab 27. Shazza McKenzie, back again from Australia 28. Razerhawk 29. Duke “The Dumpster” Droese, now in his 50s and wrestling with a prosthetic leg 30. Hallowicked 31. El Hijo del Ice Cream 32. Solo Darling 33. Ophidian

A number of stories to come out of this, the biggest one having nothing to do with the result. After being able to pin Danjerhawk and eliminate Defarge, Boomer and Dasher were left in the ring. Dasher instructed Boomer to leave the ring, but Boomer stuck around and fought. They eliminated Ice Cream Jr. and Nytehawk quickly as they continued wrestling each other. Then the next few entrants opted to stay on the floor while the the two Hatfields fought, beginning with Kobald taking a seat in the front of the bleachers and having a snack. BLANK rallied the others on the floor when he came out, but they all got eliminated, save for Fireman’s Carry Fry, who landed on an eliminated Frantik, escaped a powerbomb from him, and got onto the bleachers, hiding out while taking a seat next to me (I wasn’t able to get a good picture of us). When McCoy entered, she was revealed as Dasher’s niece, and she tried to smooth things over between Dasher and Boomer. She turned out to be on Dasher’s side all along and assisted him in eliminating Boomer. When the third enhancement wrestler Armbreaker Amir entered, he helped Fry re-enter the ring, and Amir, Fry, and Snapmare Matt worked together to toss out McCoy, as well as pin Worker Ant and Barksdale by piling up on them.

As this story of the enhancement talent rallying together begins to build, the recently rechristened John Francis of Coronado goes on a tear, gaining great support from the Wrestle Factory crowd that once largely despised him. Francis was able to eliminate Roland, who was still going after him after the Closers beat him up. He dropkicked Volgar to assist Dasher and someone else trying to eliminate him. Dasher gave Francis a high five for this, taking him by surprise, then immediately tried to toss him out, only for Francis to reverse it and toss him out for a huge ovation! Shortly after this, focus shifted back to the enhancement talents, as Jawbreaker Josue entered to join the other three, retrieving some tools from underneath the ring and proceeding to loosen the top turnbuckles so as eliminate the top rope. This pretty much happened by the end, but it got difficult as Oleg and Bull James shifted their focus from each other to them. When Enzuigiri Evan entered, he was the biggest and most powerful of the five students. I could see him having a future beyond this. He was able to pin James, and then the five students all ganged up to pin Oleg. Hermit Crab and was unfortunately eliminated by them almost as soon as he entered the ring, and the two Australian guests didn’t get a chance to really do much. Francis was able to kick out after receiving a pop-up powerslam from them (or maybe he wasn’t meant to be pinned after such a strong showing in his new tecnico role?). He was tossed out of the ring afterward, but the students slowly started to get eliminated. Droese of course brought a trash can with him, using it to eliminate one of the students. Armbreaker Amir used his armbreaker to make Droese tap out. The final four left in the ring, if I recall correctly, were Hallowicked, Darling, Whisper (who lasted a while), and Enzuigiri Evan. With the ropes being so loose at this point, all four of them tumbled to the floor... just before Ophidian made his entrance as the final entrant. As soon as he stepped in the ring, he was declared the winner and was awarded the three point medallions for his future Golden Opportunity. He nonchalantly accepted them and left, and talking with someone else online about it after the show ended, there’s a chance that the students rallying together was all in an effort to help Ophidian, their trainer, win the match. Time will tell.

Just as Ophidian left, Boomer re-entered the ring and called out his dad to exchange some harsh words. Dasher took the mic first, quietly called him “you little disappointment,” then got louder in running him down. He said Boomer doesn’t deserve to carry his bags, wrestle in his ring, share his last name, nor wear his mask. Boomer took over, saying that Dasher taught him a lot of great values in the past, but now he just sees him as a liar, a cheater, and a bully. “As far as I’m concerned, you’re not my dad!” The two began fighting again, refs tried to separate them, and then Bakabella walked out to calm them down. He referenced Fritz Von Erich in his intolerance for family in-fighting, so he made an official match for the return to Chicago in two weeks, Dasher Hatfield vs. Boomer Hatfield, Mask vs. Mask. Dasher then kicked Boomer low and swarmed him as Bryce Remsburg and seemingly the entire tecnico roster (including John Francis) caused him to leave the ring. Then Boomer got up on his feet as everyone else in the ring took a knee, and without a mic cut a fiery babyface promo about how Dasher’s new mask does not represent his legacy, and he will take it in Chicago.

This may have been the shortest full-fledged Chikara event I’ve attended in a while, clocking in just at two hours, and this was with an intermission. It was no less fun and intriguing, with a lot of interesting stories told in the Infinite Gauntlet Match and a strong segment afterward to close it. Chikara doesn’t hold their next Wrestle Factory event until September, as after their Aniversario weekend in White Oaks, PA and Chicago, they have half a dozen spot shows in conjunction with minor league baseball games (one of which will be in Trenton!), as well as a chairty show in June at a Philadelphia brewery near Callowhill). I do have some other big wrestling plans in June and July though.

[nuvisionbuilding]

Well, we are rolling (sprinting) towards another Christmas. Whilst NuVision has been busy and happy this year, some parts of the economy have apparently been very tight. We had a contract for a 3rd floor addition on Santa Claus’ house at the North Pole but it has been cancelled due to some budget problems for Mr and Mrs Claus. Santa actually told me that they are doing some major restructuring.

Apparently, the North Pole no longer dominates the Christmas gift distribution business. Internet shopping and mail order catalogues have diminished Santa's market share and they could not sit idly by and permit further erosion of their profit margins.

I am told a reindeer staff downsizing was made possible through the purchase of a late model Japanese sled for the Christmas deliveries. Improved productivity from Dasher and Dancer is anticipated after undergoing efficiency training and they should take up the slack with no discernible loss of service. Reduction in reindeer will also lessen airborne environmental emissions such as methane for which the North Pole has been cited and received unfavourable press.

I am pleased to inform you that Rudolph's role will not be disturbed. Tradition still counts for something at the North Pole. Santa denies, in the strongest possible language, the earlier leak that Rudolph's nose got that way not from the cold, but from substance abuse. Calling Rudolph "a lush who was into the sauce and never did pull his share of the load" was an unfortunate comment, made by one of Santa's helpers and taken out of context by the ‘fake news’ press at a time of year when he is known to be under executive stress.

 Santa also told me cuts are also being made in the "Twelve Days of Christmas" subsidiary. Please find below the executive summary that he emailed me from their financial reports:

 The partridge will be retained, but the pear tree never turned out to be the cash crop forecasted. It will be replaced by a hanging plant, providing considerable savings in maintenance.

The two turtle doves are redundant and simply not cost effective. In addition, their romance during working hours exposes Santa to possible workplace harassment claims. The positions are therefore eliminated.

The three French hens will remain. After all, we need the eggs for protein and everyone loves the French.

The four calling birds will be replaced by a call centre based in India. An analysis is underway to determine who the birds have been calling anyway, how often and how long they talked.

The five golden rings have been put on hold by Santa’s investment committee. Maintaining a portfolio based on one commodity could have negative implications for institutional investors. Diversification into other precious metals as well as a mix of Bitcoin and high technology stocks appears to be in order.

The six geese-a-laying constitutes a luxury which can no longer be afforded. It has long been felt that the production rate of one egg per goose per day is an example of the decline in productivity. Three geese will be let go, and an upgrading in the selection procedure by HR will assure management that from now on every goose it gets will be a golden one.

The seven swans-a-swimming is obviously a number chosen before the GFC. The function is primarily decorative. Mechanical swans are on order. The current swans will be retrained to learn some new strokes to assist in their redeployment.

As you know, the eight maids-a-milking concept has been under heavy scrutiny by the National Dairy Producers Association. A better gender balance in the workforce is also being sought. The more militant maids consider this a dead-end job with no upward mobility. Automation of the process may permit the maids to try a-mending, a-mentoring or a-mulching.

Nine ladies dancing has always been a Work Health and Safety risk. This function will be phased out as these individuals grow older and can no longer do the steps.

Ten Lords-a-leaping has been deemed irresponsible and out of touch with ‘community expectations’. The high cost of Lords plus the expense of international air travel prompted the finance department to suggest replacing the group with ten out-of-work bankers and financial planners. While leaping ability may be somewhat sacrificed, the savings are significant because we expect an oversupply of unemployed bankers and planners in the coming year.

Eleven pipers piping and twelve drummers drumming is a simple case of the band getting too big. A substitution with a string quartet, a cutback on new music and no uniforms will produce savings which will drop right down to the bottom line.

An application has been made by the NSW Law Society seeking expansion to include the legal profession ("thirteen lawyers-a-litigating").

Lastly, please be aware that deeper cuts could also happen. Santa and the North Pole Board will request management to scrutinize the Snow White Division to see if 'seven dwarfs' is a) the right number and b) should be renamed 'the seven vertically challenged folk'.

 Hopefully your situation is looking better than Santa’s and you are looking forward to Christmas. We look forward to assisting you with any building requirements next year.

 Merry Christmas,

 Richard and Kate Hoogervorst