SUNA + THE FIRST TIME HE SAYS I LOVE YOU
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...
you should've been asleep. you're always asleep before him, so why would this time be any different?
suna knows the drill like the back of his hand by now. you fight off your inevitable slumber as hard as you can, trying to stay awake for no good reason until you eventually ignore his annoyances and succumb to sleep.
tonight shouldn’t have been any different.
"hey," a finger prods against your cheek, testing the waters.
when a groan bubbles from your throat but your eyes remain closed, suna knows you’re at the ‘barely hanging on to consciousness’ stage of your sleep schedule. he uses a hand to gently squeeze your cheeks together.
“stop.”
it comes out slightly muffled by your squished lips. he huffs a laugh through his nose, “what?"
you groan into the pillow, escaping his loose grasp.
"go to sleep," he whispers, and though you can’t see him, you can practically hear the menacing grin on his face through his tease.
if your eyes were open, you’d roll them. "i’m trying to."
and it’s routine, comforting to the two of you. suna waits there in the dark, like he always does, until your breathing evens out and replicates the deep inhales of when he knows you’re out for good.
he brings his finger back up to your face, but this time, instead of poking your cheek with the incentive of aggravating you, he runs it softly across your cheekbone and then down your jawline with purpose. he’s sure to notice how your eyelids don’t flicker at the sudden touch, how your breathing never hitches with his lingering fingers.
you’re asleep by his side. and just like that, vulnerability oozes from suna’s core.
so he mans up in the most pathetic way possible and presses a kiss to your head. between the space of skin and lips comes a muffled whisper that he’s been dying to say for ages now, but hasn’t quite found the courage to say clearly.
"i love you."
it’s quiet for a moment, not a sound filling the room beside the air conditioner rattling in the window. and while suna plans to continue caressing your face, he freezes when he feels the smile growing beneath his fingertips.
you open a single eye groggily, voice raspy when you perk up with a teasing, "what'd you say?"
"nothing," he responds quickly, trying his best to defuse the situation while simultaneously not making a big deal out of it. "you're hallucinating, go back to sleep."
"i was sleeping,” you continue to press, “but i heard something weird."
suna grimaces at your choice of vocabulary before grounding himself in your light tone. you’re not angry or upset, at least not enough for him to hear it in your voice. so he slowly eases himself back onto his pillow.
"if you heard something, which you definitely didn't," he enunciates, "i don't think it was something weird."
"well if wasn't weird, then what was it?"
through the darkness of the bedroom, he can just barely make out your hopeful eyes, and he can imagine the giddy smile on your pretty face, so he exhales and swallows his pride.
"true," he admits, before hissing out in defeat, "and fucking embarrassing."
your laughter warms the bed and suna feels like he’s floating.
"true and embarrassing," you repeat through sleepy giggles, "just how i like 'em,"
his face is flushed as it hides in his pillow. "are you done making fun of me yet?"
he hears you shuffle in closer before he feels your breath on his arm.
"i will be if you say it again now that i'm awake," you barter.
"technically you were awake the first time i said it."
"rintaro," you whine, and when he doesn't give in so easily, you elaborate. "now that you know that i'm awake."
a bit more confident in his conviction, he brings his hand up once more to find your cheek.
"i said i love you," he whispers, "like an idiot."
your laughter returns, and when you wrap your arms around his torso and press your nose in the crook of his neck, he can practically feel it warming his bones.
you place a kiss to his neck with a sigh of victory, "that's what i thought.”
a few minutes eventually pass in his hold, and suna would say you have to be asleep now, but he’s learned his lesson the hard way and isn’t one to make the same mistake twice.
and he’s glad because right before he drifts off himself, he feels your head rise from his chest and a gentle kiss placed on his chapped lips.
"i love you, too,” you press into his mouth like a secret, “idiot."
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