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biteyoubiteme · 2 months

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study break

fem!reader x han jisung

synopsis: you take a study break with your boyfriend

warnings: 🔞!! slightly innocent reader, some nipple play, fingering, oral (f!rec), prob forgot some sorry

wc: 2k

an: this was a request but my inbox ate it ;-; hope i got everything anon asked for :)) not proofread sorry :( feedback appreciated! [m.list]

You have been at your desk for over six hours studying for your next exam. Hand cramping from all the notes you were copying down from slides you missed a few weeks ago. Ones that you finally remembered you needed to go over. You had only stepped away for a shower a few minutes ago to try and calm your mind after nearly crying over a worksheet. Pacing back and forth before you caught sight of your shower caddy deciding that if the shower didn’t work as a refresher then you would just take whatever grade you got and would have to live with it.

It wasn’t until the knocking at your door that you realized how stressed you had been. The evening you had planned with your boyfriend was forgotten until you pulled open the door to see him standing in the hallway of your dorm.

“So you are alive,” Han smiles as soon as you open the door. His hair curled around his ears, dotted with droplets of rain.

“nooo I missed our date,” you softly whine leaning your head on the door. The past couple of times you've studied you turned on an app that locked your phone to help with distractions. Only now it was backfiring because Han had been trying to reach you to remind you of your night out. “I'm so sorry Han I swear I didn't do it on purpose I haven't even thought about anything else besides this exam,”

“it's okay i kinda figured so I picked up dinner,” he holds up the paper bag in his hand.

“I'm the worst,” and he only smiles shaking his head, “You perfect, I should have known that scheduling a date the night before an exam was not the best idea,”

you wave him into the small space, your books a mess on your desk, the bed rumpled and unmade. Your roommate's side is just as lived in even for her off staying at her boyfriends most of the time. You're sure this is the first time hans been in here besides you picking up something but he never made it past the doorway.

The two of you have only been seeing each other for little dates for a few weeks now. You shared a class together, working next to each other in silence for most of the semester before he asked for help on an assignment he didn't need help with at all. Confessing later that he only just got up the courage to speak and used the work as an excuse. You're closer to friends than you are really dating with how slow the two of you are moving. Neither of you moved past holding hands and one interrupted make out session. But you were new to everything and Jisung was patient.

Han kicked off his shoes, setting the food down at the edge of your desk. “Have you taken a break at all?”

“I mean I showered,” you shrug, your hair is still wet, droplets of water soaking your tank top. You didn't even notice how the fabric was wet enough to leave nothing to the imagination. The outline of your nipples draws hans eyes right to your chest.

“You are all wet,” he smiles, biting the tip of his tongue. You can feel your skin getting hot, trying to play off his stare by rolling your eyes.

“Usually what happens after a shower,” you collect a few of your books, closing and stacking them up to make room. Shuffling papers around and making sure to check you have everything turned in before the exam. You're leaning over your chair looking at the assignments calendar online when you see you forgot to submit last week's discussion post. Your light sigh is enough for Jisung to place his hand on your back leaning next to you to see what you are now focused on.

“It's already late, maybe you should save it for the morning,” he suggests, warming up your lower back as he rubs soft circles against your skin.

“it's only one question, it better to just get it over with so I'm not stressing more than I already am,” although it's the last thing you want to do, already you have given up after your long day. But you rolled your chair out sitting down to work out one more question. “you should just start eating so your food doesn't get cold,”

“no no I picked up sandwiches from the cafe by the library I can wait,” he stands behind you, hands on your shoulders, fingers flicking over the thin straps of your tank top.

You pull up the post not realizing the link attached was for a document you had to read consisting of six long sheets of tiny text. Your sigh is more of a groan this time, hans chuckle right at your ear as he looks over your shoulder. “I think that's the kind you need the magnifier tool for,”

“why the hell would anyone use text that small,” you can feel the weight of the day landing heavy right at your feet. Just when you hoped to be done, to only have to overview notes you hated this. Your teeth sink into your cheek trying to will yourself not to cry over something so stupid. You were so close to finishing not only the day but your class, one assignment wouldn't kill your grade but just knowing it was going undone would kill your pride. You let your head fall to your hands, the heels of your palms pressed to the sockets of your eyes like that would will your tears away.

“Hey,” Han whispers, pushing a few strands of hair behind your ear, “come on let's take a longer break than just a shower, we can worry about that later,” his hands slip over your arms, sliding up and down, chin on your shoulder, nose bumping your ear.

“Sorry, I've just been so overwhelmed with everything,” you say, rubbing at your eyes, feeling a bit embarrassed.

“That's okay, you just need to relax, lay back, and forget school for a second,” his breath is ghosting over your ear, sending a shiver down your spine. His hands go to your stomach, finger tracing the seam of your top. “you know I could help you with that,” his nose brushes down behind your ear and down your neck, lips leaving slight pecks on your skin.

“t-the assignment?” It's a stupid question but you're not past the brain fog, now worsened by Han giving you the softest kisses on your neck. Your head falling back, eyes closed as he fell into the feel of you.

“no,” he kisses at your jaw, “not the assignment,” one hand slipping up your stomach, knuckles brushing your nipple. “is this okay?”

“yes,” you nod, reaching up behind you to twist your fingers into his hair. Your back bowed as he cupped you over the thin material of your shirt, fingers rolling over your pebbled nipples, his lips sucking marks onto your skin.

His free hand starts to slip past the waistband of your shorts, your breath catching in your throat, “you don't have to do that,” he pulls his hand back to your stomach.

“Do you not want me to? We can slow down or stop, whatever you want,” now you're more than a little bit embarrassed.

“No it's not that I want you to stop, I just- I've never really had anyone do that before,” you confess, face hot enough to thank the fact your back is to han. It wasn't that you were against it, only that you spent most time inside studying instead of going out and meeting guys to hook up with. And from what friends have said some guys don't like going down on girls with their mouths or hands. “and I know some guys don't like it,”

“yeah the wrong guys,” he chuckles the rumble of his laugh right in your ear before he kisses over the mark he made on your neck, “I on the other hand have been thinking of devouring you the second you sat down next to me that first day in class wearing that little skirt,”

“Really?” his fingers tugging the waistband of your shorts before letting it snap back in place.

“uh huh, thinking about how good you would taste, how pretty you would look cumming on my tongue, how perfect you would sound,” your hips instinctively roll at the idea, Han's hand slipping back under your waistband. “Would you like that?”

“Yes,” the whisper is enough for Han to pull your chair out from under the desk, kneeling before you looking up like you set the best platter before him.

He kisses your knee hands sliding up the side of your thighs to tug down your shorts and panties. You should feel exposed or even a little bit shy but Han is licking his lips, eyes flickering between your glistening cunt and your face. “Even prettier than I imagined,” hooking his hands at the back of your knees he pulls you to the edge of the chair, slotting your legs over his shoulders as you lean back gripping the seat watching what he’ll do next.

“Are you just going to like...kiss it?”

“I plan on suffocating between your thighs so maybe a lot more than kissing,” he peppers kisses all along your thigh, your legs already trying to close at how each kiss sends a tingle straight to your clit.

When he finally leans down and his lips brush over your swollen nub you know you're done for. His light kiss was enough to send all thoughts and stress right out the window. And when he licks up your wetness from your entrance and swipes up to your clit latching on and sucking your head falls back and you let out a moan that doesn't sound like you. Jisungs hands move to hold your hips in place.

You swear you see stars as he sucks before he pulls away your whine making him chuckle, “Do you like it?”

Your hand moves to his hair wanting to tug him back down, “please don't stop now,”

“Look at you trying new things,” he gives light kisses to your folds, loving to watch your hips try to work on their own to get his mouth back on your clit. “already doing so good at being responsive to my touch,”

“Hannie please,” you beg and he doesn't hold back. He sucks your clit into his mouth, letting one hand free from holding you down to raise in front of you.

“suck my fingers and get them all wet and ready for me to get you to cum on them,” slipping them into your mouth you follow his orders letting them roll on your tongue before he pulls them back to rub on your pussy.

Your orgasm was building in the pit of your stomach, every flick of his tongue pushing you closer to the edge. Your legs jolt at the feel of his finger prodding your entrance, knees pulling in before he shakes his head, “Relax baby,” letting your other hip go he presses the pad of his thumb to your clit rubbing at a soft rhythm until your legs rest back on his shoulders. He's slow to slip his first finger in, dragging it out before adding the second. His smile is starstruck, feeling along your gummy walls like he found heaven, “look at that, you're doing so good for me,” the slow pumps of his fingers take up more of your mind until he leans back down to suck on your clit.

Thighs trembling your head rolls back, eyes shut trying to catch your breath before you're cumming, Han pressing his fingers into your g-spot like he's always known your body. Han is swallowing all your cum down like he can't get enough of it, burying his face in your pussy as you pulse around his fingers. Your hand on his hair starts to tug harder, your hips thrusting into his face, knees closing in around his ears. He is slow to pull away from you but knows he shouldn't overstimulate you the first time. “now if you ever need me to take your mind off of anything, you don't even have to ask I'll be right here on my knees ready for you,”

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strangeninjahideout · 26 days

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In a world that lost its humanity and left more than 2.3 million people who were killed in Gaza, death is not as cruel as the life we prefer to live in the midst of the so-called metaphorical life.. I ask you to help me and my family to go out of Gaza and reach a safe city. We need our simple right to live in peace.

Hello world, I am Muhammad, a nurse in progress, living in North Gaza. This is my story in a few words.

Before October 7th, I was a student at the College of Nursing. I loved life and had many friends, but I lost a lot of them due to the occupation. I lost my college, my room, my home, and my sense of normalcy. October 7th was a turning point for me and my family. The war came without any previous warnings. The Israeli occupation is killing us in Gaza day by day. Circumstances are getting worse, and the suffering has reached its highest levels since the first day of this war.

November 19th was the worst day for us. We survived and came out of the mouth of death when the Israeli occupation bombed our house. Now we are homeless. We will never forget the feelings of fear and panic we experienced. We waited for sunrise to move from the place. We left everything behind—home, friends, university, childhood dreams, and my father. We were trying to survive without food, clothes, or even hope to continue this life. The family dispersed and fled to the south of Gaza, which was supposed to be a classified safe place. The explosions were happening all around us. We saw martyrs and wounded people lying on the ground, and no one could save them. The snipers were everywhere.

We will never forget what we have seen: bodies scattered on the ground, armed soldiers, and huge tanks surrounding us. The fear was evident on everyone's face. We traveled a long distance, each of us carrying a backpack with any clothes we could collect. Finally, we reached Deir al-Balah, thinking we would find safety as the Israeli occupation told us. We are currently temporarily staying with a nice family who hosted us. We are now without any shelter. We don't know what we will do next, we lost everything we had. We went to a small apartment where more than 30 people live. We had no beds or blankets. We struggled to get water and bread. Unfortunately, we are homeless.

My family members include my dad, Hassan, 47 years old, my mom, 45 years old.

And my sister, Lana, who is a mother of a newborn baby girl born at the beginning of the war. Lana lost her new home, her husband's job, and all her dreams.

Ritta, 7 years old, has been shining since her first day at school, coming to her first grades with love, vitality, and brilliance, but the occupation prevented her from playing like other children and deprived her of her friends and school.

My sister, Sama, is studying at middle school, which is supposed to be the stage of launching into the world, forming friendships, and strengthening her personality, but the occupation prevented her from continuing her education and seeing her friends. She lost many friends because the occupation killed them!

This war is still killing us slowly, and we can't go on anymore. The conditions in Gaza Strip are getting worse. There is no pure drinking water, we can't find the food we used to buy, and the prices here are so expensive that they compete with the most expensive countries in the world. There is no shelter and no safe place in Gaza.

Amidst the despair, there is a chance for survival with your generous support. We can escape the horrors of war and cross the borders from Gaza to Egypt. Your donation could mean the difference between life and death for my beloved family. One person who doesn't currently hold a passport costs between $5,000-$10,000 to reach Egypt alone and leave outside the walls of this war. If you can't send money, you can help by sharing my link.

If you got this far, I am grateful that you gave us part of your time. Please, help my family and me write a new happy chapter—one of survival, safety, and hope. Your kindness will not be forgotten, and we will be forever grateful for your support in our darkest hours.

#free palestine #free gaza #gofundme #human rights #please help

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mysteriesmuse · 6 months

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MusicStudent Katsuki Bakugou who’s the same grade and is a member of the ensemble you’re in this semester. As a percussionist he has a lot of spare time in his hands in orchestra and even more at a fantastic vantage point. There’s the barrier of percussion instruments that separates them onto their own little world — the set up spanning across the entire back of the rehearsal room as they all fly back and forth past each other to get to their multiple part assignments. — he’s got a lot of accessory assignments for this semester; and the fact of holding claves, triangles, swiping chimes, and slamming car engines means he’s relatively on the move. However, it also means he’s not assigned to anything during part of rehearsal — that means he can leave early at times. Which coincidentally happens to align with some of the pieces that you’re not assigned on. Not that you couldn’t perform them, but rather there’s no need for you to be there since they cut down on parts for this one piece in particular. But when you are both playing Katsuki tends to rely on his sense of time as his gaze wanders from the conductor to your chair. As he sits in the throne behind the timpani he gets the perfect view of you and your side profile. The perfect spot to overhear your light chatter - to read your micro expressions - to see the way you’ve dressed and the way you slightly mark your music. Katsuki snickers at the way you make haste to make an accusing face at the trombone players for wrong notes or overblasting tone. Katsuki twitches when he hears you frack a note waiting for the flashes of second hand embarrassment to touch your ears, but you pout and sheepishly shrug it away the only tinges of red as tingly thing in his chest. Katsuki who watches you pout your lips and talk as you slather in chapstick during the break and crack open an electrolyte powder into your water bottle and shake it up as the start of every rehearsal.

And you cradle that water bottle with you out into the hallway when you’re not needed and the two of you stand outside in the hallway together — that’s where he learned what you like to eat and drink and how you liked your boba order. And it’s on one day where the schedule declares that you’re on duty for the entire rehearsal and he isn’t that he decides to talk a walk; opening his notes app to make sure he gets your order right, your favorite flavor. And he stops at the boba truck that’s permanently parked on the right side of campus every afternoon and orders you both one. Walking back with the spring sunshine on his face and a black baseball cap sporting the university logo on it with two bobas in hand. The sweet cool breeze mingle with the chill sugary boba on his lips. The jelly tapioca pearls a familiar serotonin inviting sensation in his mouth. The calloused skin on his fingertips getting damp with the condensation - except it’s all more than worth it when he greats you after rehearsal in the room. Katsuki catches you as your packing up a red eye watching your form as the everything gets packed away into the gig bag. He waits until you’re ready and have turned for the door that he calls for you, “Oi’ I got you something,” shaking the second boba in the air. The slow and steady tortoise like walk you has speeds up as you dodge the playful fleeting fist bumps and voices of your cello and trombone friends. You flutter to a halt in the middle of the hallway. “No way, thank you ‘tsuki!”

He grins with a shrug, “You were talking about it before rehearsal and I had some off-time today. S’ no biggy.” The grin you have and the contact of your grabby hands against his has him laughing as you place your lips around the straw like a toddler. “I know you’re a purest about the instrument food thing.” After your enthuastic sip he adds, “Wanna pack up and walk around campus for a while to enjoy these?” He notes you’re dressed for it. In your cute tank top and breezy collared crochet button shirt — you worked on it all last semester and have been loathe to be found without it now that the real nice spring weather has arrived. “Yeah totally, let me put this away first and we can go!” And Katsuki watches you disappear for a few minute before you reappear and playfully knock shoulders with him as he holds the door open for you on the way out into the glorious March sunshine.

#mysteriesmusing #bakugou katsuki #bakugou fluff #bakugou drabble #katsuki bakugo x reader #mha fanfiction #bakugou katsuki x reader #katsuki bakugou #bakugou x reader #I had so much fun just putting the words out there and creating my own little self serving fanfic moment!!#I hope some other get to enjoy this little daydream of mine!

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safely-in-vhagars-belly · 7 months

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Aemond x Reader (AFAB!)

Sweet Nothing (formerly known as games in the libarary part 2!)

Aemond x reader (Tutor/gamer au) Fluffish and also smuttish

🔷Summary: Your GPA is tanking and you need help. Luckily there is the grumpy antisocial Aemond to help you out.

🔷Author's note: Based on tutor aus but I made my own spin on it.

🔷Wordcount:5389

🔷Warnings: Au universe, smut, depraved thoughts, bullying, (not aemond or mc bullying each other) rich privilege and bad parenting and the word so*p.

NAMECHANGE: A reader left a comment saying they were listening to the song ''Sweet nothing'' by taylor swift and wrote it fitted them really well so I changed the title! I hope you all like the new title:))

There is something aesthetically pleasing about college parties. Especially if they are thrown by one of your best friends, Baela Targaryen. You heard Aemond is her older something, although the Targaryen family tree has the same effect as math on your brain: It turns to soup.

You despise soup.

It is the wettest of foods, the smell, but most, you hate the name. The word appears unnatural to you, as if someone had just thrown it together-

‘’You OK?’’ A gentle yet rough edged voice brings you out of your moral debate about why soup sucks. Aemond Targaryen has followed you loyally around (with your consent, this is not a stalker situation) campus and now you both approach one of the frat houses. The house is as big as a mansion and you sometimes wonder what illegal schemes the boys of the frat house and the university you attend get up to even afford the rent of this bohemian building.

It is odd. Prior to this whole day, you didn’t know Aemond could care about anything but himself, his grades, and his silly little motorcycle (he calls it Vhagar, and it’s a ‘’she’’ apparently. You find that a bit silly, but some things that men are oddly attached to receive that treatment. Like boats) Yet here he is, asking if you are OK.

You want to cheerfully ring out that you never have been better, but realization soon hits you that it's been a while that anyone was truly interested in how you were doing. If anyone cared at all.

‘’That is a complicated question.’’ You admit.

‘’With a complicated answer, I assume?’’ He is too clever for his own good.

You chuckle. ‘’Yeah. I’m doing fine.’’ Why you feel the need to lie to him, you don’t know.

Finally you both approach the gold with blue gatework where the three Valyrian words are chiseled into the framework of the gates. Aemond crosses his arms over his chest, his backpack over half his right shoulder, threatening to fall off any moment now. He clears his throat and reads the words out loud to you. ‘’Dracarys, Dona Daorun.’’ You know some of these words. One, to be exact. ‘’Such a odd motto.’’ He adds.

Even from the garden you can hear the noises of the party, chatting, spattering of water and even loud music as someone likely brought a speaker. Or three, if you know your friends well.

Aemond seems to stiffen at the noise, his blue eyes alarmed and doubt written across his face. Instead of letting him run off, you lace your fingers through his own,and simply drag him inside with you.

‘’Pool parties are my favorite.’’ You tell Aemond with a wink. ‘’I love swimming. I always wanted to be a mermaid when I-’’ You notice his cold and suddenly icy stare at the host of the party, who approaches you in his swimming trunks.

Jacaerys Velyaron simply runs a hand through his brown hair, pushing it back slightly before greeting you as if you two are long lost friends. ‘’Y/n! You made it!’’ He grins, likely already tipsy to say the least. He looks Aemond over and you both look like you’d belong anywhere but a pool party. ‘’And you brought a friend.’’ He adds. You chuckle uncomfortably at his icy tone. As if you brought a wooden horse in and the soldiers have crawled out.

‘’I hope it’s cool?’’ you say, waving enthusiastically at your friends. They don’t wave back, red plastic cups in hands and judgemental stares all over you, but especially over Aemond who is holding his backpack only tighter, regret mirroring in his good eye as he plays with a ring on his fingers.

Luckily Jace seems to agree.

‘’You know me too well.’’ He puts his hand on your back, escorting you quickly away from Aemond. ‘’Baela wants your help, I believe. And Daemon wants to play seven minutes but he has no one who wants to play.’’ You wrinkle your nose. Daemon is a sweet, but very intense guy. He means no harm, he is just a bit too intense for you. Plus, you were certain he and Queen B Rhaenyra were dating. You at least assumed so, after Rhaenyra’s claim was made on Daemon in the form of some pretty aggressive tongue locking.

You feel so glad to see Baela that you forget all about Aemond. ‘’Oh my gosh, Y/N! Finally free of your horror session!’’ She exclaims, perhaps a bit too loud before pushing you into an exeratated and perhaps bone-crushing and soul-vanishing hug. You hug her back, of course, pretending to go alone with her agreeing you enjoy your freedom…

Although you aren’t sure why she thought you were in peril?

And horror sessions?

You think back of the way that Aemond topped you in the library, fucking you just in the right spot at the sweet oak desk-

The only horror of it was the numbers perhaps. The rest of it felt nice. Your eyes wander to some of the guys, mostly jocks and athletes drinking in the corner of the room, gathered around in a circle when placing bets and boasting about their conquest. Aemond didn’t need to be nice, yet he treated you better than most of your ex boyfriends. He maybe wanted to be inside you all the same, but he bothered to offer lunch after, and when you talked, he listened. He paid attention. Your exes mostly were lost in the front of your shirt, or tried to shut you up with kisses. You thought it was affection. Now it sickenings you to think of it.

And just like that, your usual jock conversations don’t do the thing for you anymore. A tall jock named Laenor jokes with you about how a girl had a stutter when asking him out and all you think about is how Laenor and your friends would react if they would find out you are far from perfect.

That numbers cause wars in your head, that math frightens you, that your brain can’t handle puzzles and that it all is sometimes so much to handle, to know your brain works differently, it’s sometimes a lot. It would be nice, if someone would understand. Just once.

You notice Baela has gone missing. So has Jace. Not this again. ‘’I thought we all had agreed that we would not let Baela hook up with Jace again?’’ You scold the other girls. One of them, named Sara just shrugs.

‘’O, we totally agreed that we would, this morning when getting boba. You were missing, so you didn’t notice it.’’ She smiles sweetly but you have played Stardew Valley. You have endured the caves. You know when a skeleton is smiling at you. Fuck, you watched the vampire dairies. You know when someone is out there, for your neck. ‘’When you did your cute little charity project.’’

‘’Aemond is just a friend.’’ You hear yourself say the words before you can control yourself.

Is he? Then why do you feel the sting of that lie? Then why let him fuck you in a library? Then why tell him more about you than any of your friends? Then why invite him?

You think back of Aemond, suddenly all alone by the gates and turn back around, looking for him. The more ground you cover, passing by making out couples and gambling, the more your mind tells you something is wrong.

When you arrive by the pool, you hear Jace and his closest circle of friends laughing, as well as Baela. ‘’You saw the way he looked? I thought he was gonna cry there for a moment.’’ Jace taunts, kissing Baela drunk all over her cheek. Baela giggles and turns to face you.

‘’Y/n. Rhaenyra wants us all to get coffee tomorrow. I know you are currently busy with your charity project but do keep in mind that we must all respect the social hierarchy.’’ You nod absent, more dread filling your stomach as you eye the water, where something or someone clearly came out of or someone was pushed in.

‘’Did you guys see Aemond?’’ You ask, almost ignoring Baela’s suggestion, and Rhaenyra’s clear invention to once again snoop in your life.

‘’Aemond? What do you want with that loser?’’

Daemon finally has enough of Rhaenyra and walks over to you, but Rhaenyra remains watchful as a hawk, her arms crossed and her lips perfect in a scowl. In your circles it's unheard of to steal one’s boyfriend, even if the relationship is broken up. Aside from that, Daemon is hot but also hotheaded and a real pain in the ass when he wants to be.

You lie again. ‘’Nothing. I just have his books.’’ You don’t. He took them all with him. You only have his cum likely inside of you, thank the gods for the pill.

He scales you up and down, and you feel uncomfortable. ‘’Hm. You go do that, little thing. I have something for him.’’ He takes a moment and dramatically picks up something near the pool. You watch in horror as he pulls out a soaked notebook in your eyes proof that they threw Aemond and his books in the pool.

You feel the blood leave your face.

You brought him here.

You did this.

‘’What did you do?’’ You demand, your voice becoming unnaturally sharp and cold.

Daemon is not used to that and turns to Baela who looks shocked that you dare to address Daemon that way, over someone as Aemond. ‘’We threw his backpack in the pool.’’ Daemon says, like it's obvious, gesturing to the pool like you can’t see for yourself. ‘’The little shit had it coming all those years ago. He went after it. It was like watching a little puppy drown.’’ He likely went to grab his bag. Can Aemond even swim?

Jace laughs. ‘’Daemon jumped in and held him under water for a few minutes.’’ You nearly choke on the air you take.

‘’You what?’’ You don’t care that Daemon can beat you up or is the king of the school. That goes too far in your book. Aemond could have died.

Baela grabs your wrists, so she can look into your eyes.

‘’Why do you care? It’s funny. Aemond is a loser.’’ She says, as if she is somehow hypnotizing you into becoming her mindless follower again.

But this time, you win.

‘’That’s…not funny, Baela. That is dangerous and messed up.’’ You pull your hands away, and take off running back to the gates, looking for Aemond. You have made a mistake. But how long ago did you make this? How long were you a silent bully, a witness to a tyrant? How many Aemonds did you ignore?

You finally spot him, his jacket drenched walking down the dark street, his backpack half open and his face wet of either tears or water. You rush over, calling his name. At first he ignores you. The second time, he turns around glaring at you. ‘’I should have known it was too good to be true.’’ He says, finally his voice strangled. ‘’Which of them came up with the little game? I bet it was Baela.’’

‘’What Game?’’ But you already know. He thinks this was all a cruel joke to harm and humiliate him. To break his heart.

He scoffs. ‘’This game. You are pretending to care about me. You fucking me and letting me-’’ He points a finger at you accusingly but does not have the energy left to fight.

You rush after him. ‘’I’m sorry. I didn’t know you and Jace had history. And I didn’t know they would do this to you. Whatever you need replaced, I can-’’

And that is even worse. You are a rich girl, after all.

‘’Don’t bother.’’ He snaps at you. ‘’I want you to leave me alone.’’

You don’t know how to convince him to let you in again. You suppose honesty is the best approach. ‘’I’m sorry. I never should have brought you here. But you always seemed so lonely and-’’

‘’Why do you care?!’’ You are startled by his harsh tone but don’t back down. Instead you fold your hands and blink away tears you didn’t even know you had. Your voice is a soft, sweet whisper.

You know why you care. ‘’Because perhaps I know what it's like to be lonely. Perhaps I liked the guy you are when no one is around. Maybe I wanted to know you a bit better. Not all of us rich kids are malicious assholes like Daemon, you know?’’ He seems to take his armor off at those words, his face softening and avoiding your eyes, a clear sign of regret for yelling at you. You reach out to him, kneeling at his feet.

Aemond blushes in the light of the streetlights, quickly looking around for witnesses and anyone else who might see. ‘’Wow-’’ He nearly shouts in pure surprise, and you grin at where his mind went.

‘’Don’t get excited, mister. I’m just checking the damage.’’ You tell him. ‘’Sir.’’ You add with a cheeky grin. He holds back a soft groan, although you hear it perfectly. You open the backpack, taking his books out for him and putting them on the street, oblivious to your surroundings as you start examining them.

Most of these cost at least 500. And they are all ruined. Aemond mentioned before, he isn’t a ‘’rich little girl’’ like you, and likely does not have the funds to replace these books he needs for his study. You put them back in his backpack, but you and Aemond are not stupid.

You can both tell these books are done for.

And so is Aemond if you don’t fix this mess.

‘’I am so sorry.’’ You tell him. ‘’I had no idea they were capable of this.’’ You were blind. Just as blind as Aemond.

He nods, pretending to be aloof and cool about it, but you can judge by the way his eye is glued to his shoes that he is anything but cool about this. ‘’Nothing that can be done now.’’ You refuse to believe that. There’s gotta be something. Anything.

‘’That is not true.’’ You look at his books. ‘’I’m sure there’s a solution.’’

There has to be.

Certainly.

But Aemond does not want to hear it. Instead he heads toward his dorm. You follow him, lost as a puppy, carrying his backpack for him as he gave up on it. He may have given up on it, but you won’t give up on it yet.

–

Half an hour later, the door of the dorm door opens as you enter it. Aemond is laying on his bed, playing with a sapphire. He looks at you and you are confronted with the hole where his eye used to be. He curses, quickly covering his eye and searches for his eyepatch. You put the new textbooks on the table. Aemond’s mouth drops as he takes in the brand new books. ‘’No.’’ He simply declares. ‘’No, I can’t accept this. This is insane this must cost-’’ You will murder this man.

He smells freshly showered, and judging by his hair he just got a shower, a fresh set of clothes that haven’t felt your skin yet, and a attitude that makes your inner brat go wild. Focus!

You did have to pull some strings but you don’t mind. So what if your stepdick does not give you allowance for two whole weeks? So what if your mother is ‘’beyond disappointed?’’ Like she cares. If she really cared, she’d ditch that awful guy and fly home from her paradise fucking in Dorne.

If she cared, she’d know you had the diagnosis NVLD since you were six and would never even be considered to graduate in a math study like Aemond. She would know, these books are not meant for you. She would, if only she cared. Which she obviously, does not.

You silence Aemond with a gesture. ‘’Nothing. Consider it your payment for being patient with me during our lessons. If you still wish to continue it, of course.’’ You say. ‘’I took care of it. It’s fine.’

‘’Of course it is.’’ It does not matter if you meant well, Aemond sees it as a confirmation that he, as an average earning person, can never not have the same chances as a rich girl like yourself. He could be Einstein reborn and nothing could open the doors that are thrown open for you.

‘’If you feel bad, you take some classes I don’t do. And not all your books were in your bag. You can take the books from those subjects, and we can share during our shared subjects? Unless you think it’s stupid and want nothing to do with me, I’ll vanish from your life like a sock in a washing machine-’’ He simply cups your chin, kissing your forehead. You feel heat rush to your cheeks, fighting your emotions. He waits for you to push away.

You don’t.

So he leans in, kissing your lips.

‘’Thank you.’’ He whispers. ‘’This is like the coolest thing anyone has ever done for me.’’ He says, a bit emotional.

‘’That’s what friends do.’’ You tell him.

His response breaks your heart. ‘’Hm. I never counted myself lucky enough to find that out.’’

You notice the mood changes quickly and becomes sad again. You don’t deal with that very well. If at all. ‘’So, show me around!’’ He chuckles at your eagerness, getting up from the bed, putting the sapphire he was playing with aside on his nightstand.

‘’So, this is where the magic happens.’’ He gestures to his bed, with Pokémon covers on it. He seems to notice that a moment too late and shakes his head at you, blushing brightly. ‘’I- they’re a gift from my brother.’’ He quickly blurts out. ‘’We give each other silly things for the solstice. I gave him a Charmender plushie.’’

‘’I like squirtle.’’ You tell him with a wink. ‘’He’s perhaps a bit rough around the edges, but he’s a good guy.’’

Aemond blushes again, catching on.

‘’He’s pretty great. Do you have a favorite Pokémon?’’

You think, for a moment, and only the yellow little electrician shows up, the one that clings to the main guy in the show (or is it an anime?) who goes ‘’Pika! Pika, pika!’’ and shoots lightning out of his butt. Or tail.

That is not very impressive to you, to pick Pickahu. It’s a cliche. Aemond likely will want to hear another Pokémon. A clever one, a cute Pokémon that befits your personality and your whole life.

You think back to when you were alone for your 7th birthday party. The chefs at your home had put on pancakes and you had more toys and gifts than you could count. But your mother wasn’t there. Again, gone with the Stepdick. But you know who was there? Pikachu. It was all you could rely on. Pikachu would always be there.

‘’I can only think of the main one. Sorry.’’ you confess. ‘’Pikachu.’’

He looks you up and down, as if picturing you…perhaps as a Pokémon?

‘’Don’t be. I think it fits you very well. Pickachu is a little happy fella with a big heart. That suits you perfectly, actually.’’ He tells you, smiling still like an idiot. You bet you have the same smile.

You notice his room is clean of clothing. By the desk stands a small tv, with a clear Nintendo switch docked in. You cautiously walk over, eying the switch without touching it. ‘’Yep. That is my pride and joy.’’ Aemond confirms, following you like a shadow.

You notice a big purple controller on the desk. When you accidentally bump against the desk, the controller lights up, showing you beautiful neon lights in rainbow colors. ‘’Wow. Cool controller.’’ You gently pick it up. You feel a thick almost rubber coating on the controls, and despite your hands being much smaller than Aemond’s, the controller fits perfectly.

‘’Feels funny…’’

Aemond does not say much, but you know he wants you to put it back. So you do. ‘’Uhm, yeah.’’ He comments, blushing. ‘’Uhm, purple was all there was left.’’

‘’O. I saw they have cool Zelda ones.’’ You tell him.

He looks away. ‘’They’re..expensive.’’

‘’O, right. Sorry.’’ You continue your tour. Aemond turns his controller off, and you notice some walls are there that weren’t there before. You notice a small box with a figurine sitting on a shelf by his bed, you didn’t notice before somehow. Likely too busy staring at Aemond’s wet silky hair, and his deep sad eye….

‘’Oh my gosh,’’ you mutter delightedly. ‘’You have Funko!’’ It is true. There are at least ten boxes with famous characters sitting on his shelf. You walk over, inspecting them closer, but without touching them.

Aemond rubs his neck, a bit blushing. ‘’You dig?’’

You nod, enthusiastically. ‘’Absolutely. My stepfather and I don't agree on a lot of things, But we agree that Funko’s are worth investing in. And just look how cute they are!’’ You notice a funko of GhostFace, the killer of scream, a funko of Squirtle (of course) and likely more of fantasy books and series you never truly got into.

Aemond laughs, relieved. ‘’I’m glad you like them. I sometimes worry people might find them stupid.’’ You stop glancing at his Funkos, looking back at him.

‘’I would never find anything stupid. I know too well how hurtful it is when people think you are stupid.’’ You say. Aemond nods at your words, agreeing. He is busy with rubbing his neck muscles, a pained expression almost printed on his face.

‘’Aemond, are you OK?’’ You move a bit closer to where he is sitting on the bed.

He nods, rubbing his neck still. ‘’It’s just my muscles. So annoying.’’

You look around for a pillow, picking one up from the ground.

You put it on the bed for him. ‘’I like your dorm. It is calm here. I live in a sorority. Sometimes I can barely think.’’ You admit to him.

Aemond pushes the pillow behind his back, nodding to you as if to say that you can continue your rant. ‘’You know your secret is safe with me?’’ He asks, confirming your gut. ‘’I made the mistake of telling Daemon something, and he turned it against me. I will keep it a secret.’’ He promises.

‘’What happened at the pool?’’ You ask eventually.

Aemond recalls it all too well. ‘’Well, Jace came over. He told me to get the fuck out, that you were tongue deep wrapped around a guy’s cock? Laenor or something?’’ He looks at you, giving you the chance to deny it.

You open your mind.

Aemond interrupts however. ‘’However, I know Laenor is gay. He once paid me to do an essay for him for History and he had company over when I was handing it in.’’ You don’t notice any scoffing or mocking or ill jokes.

‘’Aemond Targaryen, did you help someone cheat?’’ You tease, grinning. You like that he has a darker hidden side. He only raises his brows, slightly blushing and avoiding your eyes, biting on his under lip. Gods, that’s so hot.

He nods. ‘’It was justified. I needed money to buy a controller.’’ And controllers are expensive.

He picks the story back up where he left it. ‘’Daemon came over, told me that playtime was over. I tried to walk away, I did. He and his friends cornered me and Daemon threw me in the pool, bag and all.’’ Playtime is over? What does that mean?

‘’I tried to get out, but Daemon was faster. He grabbed me by the skull and kept my head down underwater. I am not a good swimmer. I tried kicking, resurfacing and even biting him, but he was stronger. I really thought he’d kill me.’’ You listen, imagining Aemond dead at the bottom of a pool. You don’t like that idea.

Aemond sighs, covering his face with both his hands. ‘’Oh, now I need to tell you, don’t I?’’ He sighs. ‘’The truth is: The controller is not expensive. I needed to get this one, because it has ergonomic grips.’’ So that is what you felt. ‘’I need special controllers. I have special pencils too. Just stabilos but, still.’’

It clicks.

‘’You have something with your muscles, don’t you?’’ You recall the way he wrote down the sums in your notebook, his handwriting beautiful but the way he held onto that pencil…

Aemond nods. ‘’Yeah. I’ve got Hypermobility, basically. It moves my joints much further-’’ To prove his point, he moves his thumb, now bent in an unnatural position. At first you are shocked by the ease and how quick he could do that. Then, you become curious.

‘’So, is that why you can’t swim?’’

‘’Ouch.’’ Yet he keeps smiling, likely happy to tell someone, anyone about this. ‘’No, I can swim. Just not that long, and not that fast. My muscles tire faster than usual but if I just exercise regularly, it should not be an issue.’’ He wrinkles his nose, grinning as if telling you what he thinks of that. ‘’I should swim more, but I haven't had the chance yet with classes and stuff.’’

You sit there in silence. There have been countless days you cried because you always assumed you were the only one at college who had these things. Things like your math-soup. Yet here is someone else, who too, is struggling in their own way. In a way it is disgusting to think about it, but it makes you feel less alone. It makes you feel something you haven’t felt ever before. It makes you feel ….

Good enough.

Capable.

Hopeful for the future.

Aemond switches his thumb back in its regular position, and you wonder if the long fingers are part of the condition he has. It likely is, as Aemond’s fingers are really tall. ‘’Now you know something about me too.’’ Aemond says. ‘’Although, I would appreciate you keeping this a secret.’’ He adds. ‘’I don’t want pity or special treatment. I’m sure you can relate to that.’’ Yeah, you do.

‘’Or worse, people telling me what I can and can’t do. Just because I have a condition, a disability, so to speak, does not mean that I’m helpless or something.’’ He rambles on. You nod.

You see the final shelf above the closet of Aemond’s room. You take note of a few plushies, mostly squirtle but another one takes your interest. It is a adorable devil like creature with big ears and a wooden stick in its hand.

‘’Who’s that?’’ You ask him, pointing to the red little fella. Aemond follows your finger, looking at the plush. He breaks into a grin, quickly rushing over to the plush, picking it up so you may see it up close.

‘’That’s from Zelda.’’ He begins to tell, excited to share this with you.

‘’That’s Link?’’

He looks a little different than on the box art you’ve seen. Link is usually a humanoid guy with blonde hair. Not a red devil creature with a smile so big you’d assume it learned when the world will end.

‘’No, that’s a Bokoblin’’ Aemond gently corrects you. ‘’He’s like the goomba of the game. They attack Link.’’ Aemond rambles off to tell you about Zelda, where you would encounter the creatures, and how they prefer meat, but accept fruit as well, almost as humans. He also shows you different patterns of bokoblins, and depending on the color, the level of difficulty to defeat them changes.

‘’So what do you do once you got them all beaten?’’ You ask.

He breaks into a grin. ‘’Oh, that’s the wonderful thing about this game. Once in a few days, there is a Blood Moon. All enemies you killed respawn. The bad guy resurrects them. The souls find their bodies, once more.’’ He shows you a video he made on his switch.

From the very first time you saw that moon rise up on where Aemond’s Link was standing, slowly covering the world in the red, threatening life and hearing the tense music play, and just Aemond being next to you on his bed, unaware of you holding his hand, you were done for. The bokoblin looks at you from where Aemond put him on the desk. A temporary spot, you are certain.

‘’Hey, uhm Aemond?’’ You ask, breaking his concentration as he searches for more videos to show you. He looks up, and you are confronted once again with his elf-like face.

‘’Remember when you said that I would like Zelda?’’ You ask.

He nods. You nod to his switch. You are nervous but shoot your shot.

‘’If you want, can we perhaps play it? If you are near me, I can ask whatever questions I’ve got without feeling stupid.’’ Aemond perks up at that, nearly causing his head to bump at your own.

‘’No one knows everything on their first play through. You are not stupid. This game came out in 2017, I picked it up years later for my birthday, and I still discover stuff years later.’’ He says. You nod, still awaiting his no or yes.

‘’Of course, I want to play Zelda with you.’’

Aemond and you nestle up on the bed, forgetting all about the world outside his dorm. He takes the controller from the desk, handing it to you. He creates a special profile on his switch for you, although you protest at first. He has however 3 empty slots so he claims he does not mind. After your profile has been made, he opens Zelda for you. Then he just watches you, plays, discovers and lives.

—

You run around as Link in circles, not bothering to put the clothes on that you found earlier. You notice beautiful mushrooms near the cave, so you pick them. Aemond watches you play, an amused smile on his lips as you discover the truly wild and boundless experience of this game.

You notice an old man sitting near a fire. ‘’Talk to him. He is important.’’ Aemond says, without spoiling too much. You have Link run over, still wearing just his underwear. In enthusiasm, you double click, but by doing so, you steal a cooked apple in front of the man, likely the owner.

‘’Hey, that’s my apple! This won’t stand!’’ The man says.

’Oh fuck, will he hate me now?’’ You ask Aemond. Aemond laughs, but not at you. He just seems to enjoy being with you.

He shakes his head and moves a little closer to you. ‘’Nah. He can’t hate you. You’re kinda perfect.’’ You blush as he moves a little closer, kissing your cheeks.

—-

Soon after that encounter you finally see a bokoblin wander around. Well, it kind of came jumping out of a bush and tried to kill you, but you do not mind.

You rush at them. ‘’Hug time!’’ You declare. In your hand is a stick. You don’t expect to actually hug the creature, but to hit them. That is actually a lot more difficult than it appears, as the creature jumps out of the way, attacking you back.

Eventually you are defeated and turn to Aemond for help, who gives you a few tips.

Together you slay the monster.

And take his horns, for some reason.

—----

It is late now, almost one in the morning. It is sunday today and thank the gods for it.

You and Aemond are still up, bottles of soda and pringle cans opened up around you, as your eyes are glued to the screen. You and Aemond have just met Impa, and you are tired, but you can’t seem to stop playing. A yiga clan member ambushes you, and despite your pathetic little squeak of surprise, you manage to defeat it. Alone.

Eventually you fall asleep, in Aemond’s room, his body close to yours. The controller remains on the bed, between an empty bowl of pringles and Aemond’s bokoblin plushie. You hear Aemond’s gentle snore and just close your eyes and welcome the sound of nothing.

Just Sweet nothing.

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 1 year

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AITA for telling kids the truth about death?

I (27X) work at a children's museum as an educator. We have an animal collection mostly consisting of snakes. We raise mice and rats to feed the snakes. I take care of the animals some days of the week (cleaning tanks, changing water, etc).

Today, my coworker (late 20s, F) was leading small groups of campers (7-8, assorted) on tours of the animal care back room while I was doing tasks. I was offering fun facts and generally being friendly while working.

Some campers asked "do you wait for the mice and rats to die before you feed them?" And my coworker said "yes, we do". This is of course a lie, it would be ridiculously inefficient and also dangerous to the animals eating them. I made a noise and gave her a side-eye, and she was like "OP, they're only in second grade". I didn't push it in front of the kids and let her finish the tour.

I've gotten that same question before, and I've always told kids the truth. I knew about the food chain at that age, and I don't see the value in lying to kids in a way that's just going to make them more upset later on when they find out the truth.

AITA for being frank about death and the food chain to children?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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henpillled · 3 months

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Quick n dirty Hurricane post

Hurricane Shopping List

Food:

The government will tell you that you need 3 days of food, you need at least a week. After Ian we were flooded for about 4 days and had no power for 8. You want non perishables and you want tasty non perishables, get things you and your family like. Keep your eye out for sales through the year to keep a good stash.if you don’t have a grill, Get a mini charcoal grill so you can also still cook

Soups

tuna and other canned meats

Ramen (fun, not nutritious)

Snacks like chips and crackers, salsa!*

Single serving sauce packs (go hog wild at fast food places)

Cereal

Fresh fruit

Pasta sauce and pasta

Bread and shelf stable toppings like jelly* and peanut butter

Treats! It sucks, get some gummy bears, get BEER!

Instant coffee

*these aren't technically shelf stable,but yes they are lol, at least for a few days, sugar and acid are both preservatives, if it looks funny, don't eat it, but they'll be fine for a few days

Everything in your freezer will be good too, at least for a while. Eat everything in your fridge first, but after a few days, if you are going to lose everything in your freezer anyway, open it up and start using meats etc in there.

Water:

There are 4 categories for water, Drinking, cooking, cleaning, and flushing. ** if you do not have hot water, you need to be using bleach or vinegar or everything that gross. Hot water is our best friend and if we do not have her we need to kill every germ, without proper plumbing there are bad germs everywhere.

Drinking: half gallon to gallon per person per day

Cooking: A gallon per day, more if you have a larger family

These two need to be in sanitized containers intended for water storage, so bottled water, or food grade 5 gallon containers, tractor supply has good ones, or the huge water jugs at the grocery store.

Cleaning***: as much as you can, personally i start saving every 2 liter, OJ bottle, milk jug etc from about January to hurricane season so i can fill them all up when a storm is on the way. This doubles as you-cleaning water, so the more the better

Flushing: as much as physically possible. Fill up every tub, every sink, fill up your trash cans. I am 100% serious you WILL run out of flushing water before anything else. Literally as much as possible.

Misc items:

Battery banks, whether proper banks, or your laptop to use as a bank

A full tank of gas, never go under half a tank during hurricane season

This radio is great

Proper first aid kit (you should already have one tbh)

Any medications you need, check your state laws to see if you can get emergency prescription refills

Toys, books, any kind of entertainment really, it gets boring, couldnt imagine being a toddler.

Extra pet food

Baby wipes

Extra period products

Corn starch is a decent dry shampoo

General tips:

Find a radio station with a morning show, find several. There was a group in my area that was broadcasting 24/7 taking calls from people with trucks and people who needed help or medicine. They saved lives.

Park your cars as high as possible, and as close to your house as you can

It is so much better to feel silly with all this stuff than to be caught off guard

Lock your pets in a non carpeted room if you can.

Do laundry!!!!!

Shower and scrub every square inch a few hours before the storm starts, wash your hair!!!

Have 2 weeks of undies

Check on your neighbors

DO NOT GO INTO FLOOD WATERS WHY DO PEOPLE DO THIS THIS IS HOW YOU GET HEPATITIS

Have a plan for if it floods, have important docs and some food in a bag ready to go. If you are in an attic without a way to break through the roof, you will drown.

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rescuehumans-runtotherescue · 1 year

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Close up Inspection Of Cody’s Belongings In The Pizza Pi Episode

There are some duplicates that make sense and others that don’t.

Downstairs:

1. Comic books

2. Binoculars

3. Teddy bear, possibly in a police shirt.

4. Dinosaur stuffy

5. Rubber Ducky #1

6. Action figure

7. Books with a picture of a fire on the front, probably lad pioneer books.

8. Books with the Griffin Rock emblem.

9. Water tank (?) #1 & #2

10. Just books in general.

11. Tuba

12. Lantern. I thought there was a duplicate in the upstairs scene, but there is not.

13. Duck tape

14. Big Dice

15. Phone (?)

16. A couple newspapers

17. Soccer ball #1

18. Magician hat #1 (call back to the Bots and Robbers episode when he was the villain in his school play).

19. Baseball bat #1

20. Trumpet

21. Boombox #1

22. Robot and Dinosaur toys

23. Life vest and possible water safety books with it.

24. Basketball #1

This is the zoom in, some stuff is moved around but the only things here that weren’t seeable in the wide shot are

25. Notebook #1?

26. What looks like an iPhone?

Upstairs:

27. Cardboard Optimus Head

28. Med kit #1

29. Jacks

30. Fire Extinguisher #1

31. Magician hat #2

32. Rubber ducky #2. I realize now it autocorrected to runny in this pic, but I’m not changing it now.

33. Teddy bear, possibly in a police shirt #2

34. Moose Hat

35. Cup

36. Various Stuffies

37. Notebook #2?

38. Baseball #1

39. Baseball bat #2

40. Rocket toy #1

41. Rocket toy #2

42. Board game

43. Basketball #2

44. More books

45. Clothes

46. Rubber ducky #3

47. Pringles can? Back side of water bottle?

48. Baseball #2

49. Plant

50. Soccer ball #2

51. Duffel Bag

52. Foam Finger

There was a zoom in shot with Graham on the ground but there was no new stuff so I’ve left it out.

53. Rackets

54. Cleats

55. More clothes. Clothes everywhere. He’s a teenage boy though, c’mon.

56. More books

57. CD?

58. Soccer ball #3

49. Boombox #2

50. Med kit #2

51. Fire extinguisher #2

52. Another book

53. Rubber ducky #4

Spitting thoughts out:

Lmao notice how there is stuff all over the downstairs and the upstairs hallways and staircases but he left the kitchen mostly clean? Same. Getting to food = important.

So it makes sense that they have multiple med kits and fire extinguishers because they’re a rescue family.

Cody seems to have a lot of dinosaur related little kid stuff so Dino kid confirmed.

He seems to be a big reader but Cody’s a smart kid so yeah we could’ve figured that. Also I bet Charlie has preached the need to get off the internet and do other things.

Makes sense that he has a lot of soccer balls because apparently it’s the family sport. Kade, Dani, and Graham have lots of soccer trophies. There was a whole episode about how Cody is bad at soccer.

Makes sense he has a lot of basket balls and baseballs. We see the family play basketball all the time and at the end of the soccer episode, Kade insists Cody try out for baseball.

You would think they’d have a shed or something to put all their sports stuff in??? Why have them inside????

Why the boomboxes?? I could see if one of them used to be Charlie’s and he gave it to Cody, but why two?

The magician hat and the trumpet are both call backs from previous episodes. I don’t remember exactly the trumpet one, but it was when he was trying new things for a lad pioneer badge or extra credit in school or something. Heatwave recommended martial arts but it didn’t go well???

The duplicate of the Teddy bear with the police shirt and the duplicate of the magician hat are clear accidents.

The moose hat is because the moose is the mascot of the team Kade was on.

Why the tuba? What’s with the water tanks? Cody has his own plant? When’d he make the Optimus head? That would’ve been cute to see!

Why the hell does he have so many rubber ducky’s?!?!?!???

//Don’t take this post too seriously. I know there’s going to be animation errors. I find it amusing.

Bonus:

54. Lucky soccer shorts from first grade

55. Mr. Macaroni from preschool

#I’m aware they probably just didn’t think anyone would look this in-depth about all this #or that they thought no one would care #I’m not mad about the duplicates or anything I just wanted to look closer at this to try to find out more about the codester #Cody burns #pizza pi #tfrb #transformers rescue bots #transformers rescue humans #tfrb Cody burns #trb Cody burns #Cody burns headcanons #rescue humans headcanons #long post

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covid-safer-hotties · 19 days

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Kids Are Headed Back to School. Are They Breathing Clean Air? - Published Sept 3, 2024

Across the U.S., kids are headed back to their classrooms—just as COVID nears a fresh, late-summer peak. Somehow, four years into a viral pandemic that everyone now knows spreads through the air, most schools have done little to nothing to make sure their students will breathe safely.

We—and especially our children—should be able to walk into a store or a gym or a school and assume the air is clean to breathe. Like water from the faucet, regulations should ensure our air is safe. “Air is tricky. You can choose to not partake of the water or the snacks on the table, but you can’t just abstain from breathing,” notes Gigi Gronvall, senior scholar at the Johns Hopkins Center for Health Security and an author of a 2021 report on the benefits of improving ventilation in schools.

The COVID-causing virus SARS-CoV-2 is far from the only airborne risk in schools. There are also other respiratory viruses, smoke from wildfires, mold spores, off-gassing from plastics and other compounds, air pollution from traffic and industry, and allergens that worsen asthma and add to sick days. Yet federal air standards are stuck in the 1970s, when they were mostly aimed at protecting people from secondhand tobacco smoke, says Joseph Allen, director of the Healthy Buildings Program at the Harvard T. H. Chan School of Public Health. Fully updated standards for buildings are years or even decades away.

It’s hard to assess just what schools have or haven’t done to improve indoor air quality. No one—not one federal agency—collects nationwide air quality data on individual schools. Schools could use federal money to update air filtration and ventilation during the height of the pandemic. But a 2022 Centers for Disease Control and Prevention survey of school districts found that only half had taken simple steps such as opening windows or doors or using fans, and even fewer had upgraded ventilation systems.

The benefits go beyond protecting children and adults alike from airborne disease spread. “Better ventilation is linked with better test scores and grades [and] better workplace performance,” Allen said at a July meeting about air quality held by the Bipartisan Commission on Biodefense, a U.S. think tank.

“We have made incredible gains related to food safety, sanitation and water quality. Where is air quality in this?” he asked. “We have ignored it.” The CDC and the Food and Drug Administration quickly warn people about listeria in sliced meat or lead in cinnamon, but no one’s checking the air in public buildings for disease-causing germs.

It’s not even hard to make sure indoor air is clean. Even in the 1800s, by having open doors and windows, tuberculosis sanatoriums prevented the spread of disease by air. The CDC has extensive guidelines on what’s known as air exchange, but ultimately, it’s a matter of moving contaminated air out and fresh air in.

If it’s too hot, cold, polluted or humid outside, heating, ventilation and air-conditioning (HVAC) systems can clean up the air perfectly well when they are installed properly and used consistently. Their benefits far outweigh their costs.

“There never has been a building that we could not turn into a healthy building with just a little bit of attention,” said Allen, one of the country’s top crusaders for cleaner air, at the biodefense meeting.

Pandemic fatigue, of course, explains much of the apathy around making air-quality improvements. Public officials, from principals to local legislators right up to the top of the federal government, see that hospitals are no longer overflowing with COVID cases and that the nightly news no longer provides daily death counts. Most parents no longer clamor for assurances that their kids are safe from SARS-CoV-2.

Despite regular, ongoing spikes in COVID, most people have dropped precautions such as masks, even in hospitals.

“People are like, ‘There’s not a whole lot you can do about it,’ and that is why, societally, we need to do something about it,” Gronvall says. “We did this for water once upon a time, and we can do it for air.”

Even the experts have mostly let down their guard.

It wasn’t until halfway through the daylong, in-person-only biodefense conference on air quality that someone even thought to ask if the air in the room was safe to breathe. “Are air monitors effective?” asked former U.S. representative Fred Upton, a Republican and a commissioner at the Bipartisan Commission on Biodefense, at the July meeting. “Does anyone here have one?” added Upton, who had represented Michigan’s sixth district until 2023.

“Are you sure you want to know?” someone in the audience asked, prompting laughter. Rick Rasansky, CEO of XCMR Biodefense Solutions, did have a carbon dioxide monitor, a device that gives a very rough estimate of the amount of fresh air exchange in a room. He read out a “pretty good” measurement.

That was a lucky thing because the 100 or so people attending the meeting had been seated shoulder to shoulder for several hours at that point. Not one was wearing a mask.

It will take federal legislation and sustained attention to make a difference.

The Center for Health Security at Johns Hopkins University have developed a Model Clean Indoor Air Act, which state legislatures throughout the country could use in writing new indoor air laws. In Congress, Representatives Paul Tonko of New York State and Brian Fitzpatrick of Pennsylvania have introduced a bipartisan bill that would require the Environmental Protection Agency to list indoor air contaminants and develop guidelines (albeit voluntary ones).

The new federal Advanced Research Projects Agency for Health (ARPA-H) found a great acronym in its Building Resilient Environments for Air and Total Health (BREATHE) program, which will develop and roll out cool new air-cleaning technologies.

But fancy tech isn’t enough on its own, and some schools may have wasted money on glittery toys instead of real fixes. Ceiling-installed ultraviolet lights won’t kill germs if the air isn’t blown upward to get cleaned in the first place. And gadgetry won’t create the demand and enthusiasm needed for cleaner indoor air. Politicians won’t win elections by campaigning on clean indoor air. But once they have been elected, federal, state and local officials owe it to kids, their parents and their neighbors to fight this most invisible of all hazards.

“We need to make it easier for people to see what they can’t see—to see what they’re breathing,” Gronvall says.

Unpaywalled link: archive.is/20240904045601/https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/kids-are-headed-back-to-school-are-they-breathing-clean-air/#selection-499.0-617.111

#covid #mask up #pandemic #covid 19 #wear a mask #coronavirus #sars cov 2 #public health #still coviding #wear a respirator #clean air

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estellardreams · 4 months

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✨The Needlemouse Children Fun Facts/Info✨

Skitter - Age 10

Skitter did grow up in a forest, being abandoned as a baby and forced to fend for himself. He eventually broke into Maurice's lab and managed to upgrade his systems before escaping.

Skitter goes by Skit as well. It's a nickname.

Skitter cannot speak. Sayori did teach him sign language, which he manages to understand but sometimes certain words confuse him.

Skitter is actually really smart, almost rivaling Miles. He's just more of a... Feral version of him (like Mangey from Sonic Prime for reference).

Skitter loves sneaking into narrow or cramped places. He also sleeps in the vents. A lot.

Skitter is shockingly pretty responsible over the twins. If only they'd listen to him more often...

Skitter is actually a fire elemental, specifically a unique variation of a flight type. He can conjure up fire wings on his back to use as actual bird wings or a jetpack.

Skitter oftentimes upgrades the security system, badniks, and mechs around the base.

Skitter is meant to be in 5th grade, but in actuality he got moved up to 7th grade because of his intelligence.

Skitter is in speech counseling to teach him how to talk properly along with acting more civilized. (Skitter ignores the latter part of the lesson)

Skitter has very sharp teeth naturally. And also has a habit of gnawing on people.

Skitter has a few sensory issues. He's not fond of water at all, nor anything sticky or slimy. He'd prefer something either rough or soft to the skin for comfort.

Skitter also despises clothes but can put up with them. The only thing he actively enjoys wearing is goggles.

Skitter can understand English along with a few bits of another language. He just can't speak it.

Skitter often squeaks when he's anxious.

Skitter can control fire.

Charlie - Age 7 (Three minutes older than Marley)

Charlie is oftentimes the leader when the twins work together.

Charlie is very trigger happy when it comes to weapons. ESPECIALLY explosives.

Charlie is the only sibling who actively curses (an accident on Sayori's part for saying those words around her)

Charlie holds wind magic since her mother was a wind elemental. She is a speed type, granting her wind enhanced super speed.

Charlie took some inspiration from Maurice, making her start wearing a cape and getting into mechanical weaponry. Specifically bombs.

Charlie knows how to use a longsword. Don't ask me how, she just does.

Charlie constantly wants to bomb the resistance to help her father, even if it's dangerous.

Charlie often gets burnt. A lot.

Charlie is very much into salads. She's not that fond of carb heavy foods since they hurt her stomach. (<- Actually can't have carbs in general. Unknowingly is Celiac)

Charlie has learnt how to drive Maurice's mechs through trial and error. She's also been trying to build her own mech in secret.

Marley - Age 7 (Three minutes younger than Charlie)

Marley somehow knows how to drive. Don't ask him how he knows, he just does.

Marley holds earth magic since his father was an earth elemental. He is also a power type, granting him super strength.

Marley has driven a tank and tractor before.

Marley's leg strength is surprisingly powerful, being able to kick up to 6 thousand pounds with ease. Anything more than that poses a struggle. But with his arms he can hold up to 4 thousand pounds.

Marley is a fan of using chainsaws as weapons, even if they're too massive for him.

Marley can easily swim in water and can hold his breath longer than his sister, which is by five minutes.

Marley is very much into fruits and berries, not so much on vegetables. He also indulges in a lot of carbs and proteins to keep up his strength.

Marley sews his own and his sister's clothes, surprisingly enough. He has a very delicate touch and is very meticulous over it.

Marley has very extensive knowledge over robotics and engineering. He's also been the one to tutor his sister on constructing machinery for them to use.

Both Twins

Charlie and Marley both grew up in a small village named Pine Grove. When they were both four, they saw Needlemouse on the news for the first time and became enamored. Ever since then they've idolized him and followed him around.

Charlie and Marley are partners in crime. They plan out everything together.

The twins are pretty inseparable unless they were forced apart.

Marley and Charlie are both supposed to be 2nd grade yet their intelligence would put them in 4th grade. They're the youngest students in their class and are on track to graduating high school when they're around 15 years old.

The twins do have their own villainous streak away from Needlemouse. Such as stealing and using anything at their disposal to cause havoc for the resistance.

The duo also know a lot about restraints, mostly thanks to Marley. If necessary they could easily capture someone.

The two are not... Exactly the most stable individuals. They care deeply for each other no matter what, though.

✨Bonus✨

Mars - Age 3 (Staurice Ship Child (Canon Undetermined))

Mars was created due to Sayori wanting a younger brother. This makes him a half-sibling to the trio.

Mars' holds a pink corruption type power, which combined with Maurice's speed means it accelerates extremely rapidly through negativity and it can be receded enough through positivity if necessary.

Mars' only way to recede the corruption so far is through forming a connection with those he corrupts. If not it'll make him upset and then make the situation worse.

Mars has both chaos energy and corruption magic. With the Chaos energy being a helpful stabilizer, he's much less likely to have his corruption spike due to his emotions once he's older.

Mars still needs new inhibitors, as the ones Sayori constructed are too primitive for a complex form of magic he possesses.

This is one of the first cases Star has seen and read about in documents of a corrupted state that is... Docile. Although she assumes it to be because of his age.

Star and Maurice are very... Ace. They had no interest of having a child at all, nor harbored any romantic feelings towards one another. So being shocked about Mars was... An understatement. Mars however was extremely clingy to both of his parents, regardless if they were together or not.

Shockingly, Mars doesn't perceive Sayori as his actual mother/creator unlike most babies. He just sees her as his older sibling. This is definitely a rare reaction for babies because they usually cling to the first person they see as a maternal figure.

Mars did get discovered when he managed to sneak away from Sayori and accidentally knock over a badnik in the process, getting Maurice's attention.

Mars is an incredibly fast learner, able to pick up words and mannerisms from others with ease.

Mars is very emotional over things, thanks to Star's tutoring and trying to avoid something in a similar situation to her from repressing their emotions.

✨Super Forms✨

Skitter has never used his Solar form before.

Marley has used his plant form and is really skilled with it, too.

Charlie has never used her Fae form.

Mars only got into his corrupted state on accident when he was a baby/toddler. Later when he was much older he figured out how to control it and shift on command.

#sonic #sonic au #text post #digital art #sonic fanart #evil sonic au #🌸mine

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dawnwilliams · 2 years

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End your search for food-grade water tanks with Belding Tank. They are one of the best fiberglass tank manufacturers in the US! contact them now!

#Food Grade Water Tanks #Storage tanks #Belding Tank

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mrhaitch · 2 months

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HIHI Mr. Haitch! Probably yes to the whole red is a lucky colour thing. My grandma tried to give me a super old red food colouring which she said: “you can use this one so it will be bright” but it looked about 30 years old and kinda gross so I declined and got some fresh red food colouring from my baking stuff. Also YEA WHY IS CONTACTS SO EXPENSIVE WITH ASTIGMATISM?!? I bought so many for my dance (glasses fly off if I try to turn with them) and it’s this huge dent in my wallet. Well… anyways ONTO THE QUESTIONS!

A lie you tell your children? Doesn’t have to be big

When did you find out you needed glasses? I was in about… 2nd or 3rd grade I think? My first pair was colour changing (frame)

Do you have a favourite thing that Haitch wears?

FUN FACT: Australia lost 2 wars against emus. They even brought in military I think.

1. I lie to them constantly, but in small silly ways. No examples come to mind - but I tend to give ridiculous answers to basic questions (what's for dinner? - whatever we can catch on the way home/smashed rat/three dobermans in old wash water)

2. I must have been seven, but they made me wear an eye patch for months - insisting I had a lazy eye.

3. Tank tops and jeans, because she's always at her most comfortable. Also pencil skirts.

4. I did know that, actually. Emus are crafty and well-accustomed to guerilla warfare.

#mr.haitch #mrhaitch #mr haitch #mrhaitch answers you too

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bisexual-horror-fan · 1 year

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"Making Him The Exception." Machete Sam X AFAB! Reader.

Okay! So! I love the movie Club Dread. It is this silly horror comedy that is kinda parodying slasher movies, and we watched it in the Boiler Lounge the other week and everyone was looking at Sam being like, “Why he kindaaaa-” and I joked about writing him a fic, and so, here it is! This is very much in the same vein of that fic I did for Steve The Kayak King. I don’t wanna fuck Sam personally but I love, love, love doing a fun silly joke fic on occasion! So let's get into this, I had so much fun doing it and I hope you like the ridiculousness.

—

Rating. NSFW, Length. 3.2K. Machete Sam X AFAB! Reader. Warnings: Reckless Partying And Hook-up Culture. Jokes. Bantering. Teasing. Alcohol Consumption. Friends With Benefits. Sexually Forward Reader.

—

You were enjoying vacation on Coconut Pete’s Pleasure Island massively. Stupid games, hanging by the pool or on the beach, more food and more drink than any one college student could or should, reasonably consume. You met lots of great people on your trip too, you had no shortage of people to talk to, you found yourself talking with just about anybody.

First breakfast with a group of college kids from Tampa on spring break who were on the same soccer team. Next, then you could have lunch on the sand with some tourists from Europe who were weirdly into Pete’s music and saved up to come to his island getaway resort together, their suitcases half full of his entire discography on vinyl that they found in thrift shops across the pond. Last you then did dinner from the buffet with this couple who were on again off again, on while on vacation together, off when at their respective schools, the distance too much while the semesters happen so they simply break up until the next time they can be together in the same space for a reasonable amount of time. Weird but they seemed to really live it up when together at least.

You however, were very glad you came here alone, able to just have time for you, soak up the tropical atmosphere and party hardy to your contentment. You normally worry a lot about other people, this trip was about being selfish, indulging yourself and what you want completely, no whim was ignored, no craving left unsatiated.

Something that you hadn’t counted on was how friendly, helpful and damn fun the staff at this resort was, they were very involved and clearly good at what they did. You took some tennis lessons from Putman, did a cliff diving session with Juan, but the one person you kept running into was Sam, resident fun police, his entire job was to ensure people were having a good time. He clearly loved his work, an almost permanent smile on his face, playful demeanour and a mischievous look in his eyes, always flitting about, encouraging people to get into games, get out of their shells, talk to people, pairing couples up or to take a shot. He had a really positive excitable energy that was infectious.

It took a while into your stay for you two to become properly introduced, mostly due to the fact you were already constantly out and about having fun, no need for him to step in. The night you first had a conversation it was in the dance club. You were catching your breath after a bout of dancing, leaning against the bar and he came up, gesturing to Lars with one hand, the other holding up his comically large water gun, “I need a refill.”

“You got it!” Came the call in response and then a bottle of tequila was thrust into his open and outstretched palm. You watched as the cap on the back tank of the gun was spun open, the lid on the bottle flicked off and then as he upended it to fill the toy meant for summer fun with 40%, silver, grade A, bad decision juice. Your eyebrows raised and you asked for the thumping beat of the techno-dancey music, “You’re putting tequila in that?”

His gaze flicked over to you, grin widening as he responded like it was obvious, he spoke loudly as he responded, “Yeah!”

“Why?” You ask and he shrugs, “Can you think of a more fun way to take a shot?”

You hum in consideration and offer up, "Jello shots?"

He scoffs as if offended, "Jello shots are the peak vehicle of alcoholic consumption and fun to you? What are we in? Seventh grade?"

He finished filling the gun up and gestured with it, "Vodka laden gelatin in disposable plastic tops this?"

The vigorous action of him pumping the gun to ready it to shoot makes you stifle a giggle, you say, “I dunno! I’ve never taken a shot via squirt gun before!”

There is that look again, pure mischief, he holds the gun up, braced against his shoulder, pointing it directly at you, he asks, “Do you want to?”

A laugh breaks out, you push off the bar turning to face him and put your hands on your hips, “Are you challenging me?”

He laughs too, throwing on a goofy country southern drawl that matches the cowboy hat he was sporting perfectly, he says, “Sure am partner.”

You continue the bit, “You positive you can make a shot like this?”

“Fastest fingers this side of the e-qau-tor.” He stretched out “equator” with his accent and you laugh harder, “Well shoot, gimmie all you got.”

Arms out and mouth open, you close your eyes and he takes the aforementioned shot, a long, honestly too long, stream of tequila right between your lips. The taste was so strong, the force of it more powerful than you anticipated, it burned, you almost gag, it overflows your mouth but you get a few swallows full before he stops. Your eyes crack back open, hand swipes over your chin, mopping up some of the alcohol. Your outfit feels more damp now and it isn't from the sweat you worked up on the dance floor, you are sure you reek of tequila, you take a deep breath and only sputter and cough once, an action he deems, "Impressive!"

The thumbs up he gives puts the smile back on your face and he asks, "So? What's the verdict?"

"Fun! Very fucking fun. Better than a jello shot." You admitted, it was certainly more memorable if nothing else and he beams, "Told you!"

He did. Someone called out, "Hey Sammy! Hit me!"

He turned when hearing the call, he pointed at them, "I'm coming for you!"

A look over his shoulder with an adjustment of that same ridiculous cowboy hat, "Duty calls. See you round-"

You fill in the blank, give him your name, he thanks you and then with a wave and you say, "See you later."

Off he goes, water gun at the ready, you turn back to the bar to order a palette cleanser to chase down the burn of the tequila and you hear the high pitched half scream from the other patron getting their fair share shot down their throat and Sam’s loud laughter. He’s a cool and funny guy, definitely worthy of the name of fun police you have decided.

The next time you see Sam is when he is hosting a Luau night on the beach. You hear his voice behind you asking, “Cocktail?”

You turn with a smile and are greeted with the sight of Sam clad in a button up tropical themed short sleeved shirt and a grass skirt over cargo shorts, a coconut bra thrown over top the shirt and a ludicrously large hat made out of woven dried grass you couldn’t help almost choking on your laughter. He was holding a tray that was filled with cocktails in halved pineapples, bright multi-coloured umbrellas sticking out along with crazy straws and those little plastic swords stuck with fruit.

“Uh yeah sure.” You answer around another laugh as you reach out and pluck up one of the drinks and he asks, “What’s the matter?”

One hand is on his waist, the other holding up the tray he cocks out his hip, the pose makes the laughter worse and you manage to get out, “Your outfit is killing me man.”

“What? You don’t like it?” He asks in a higher tone that only further adds to the comedy, both hands on the tray he sways back and forth before fully twirling showing off the movement of the skirt.

“No, I like it a lot! It is very on brand.”

“And what is my brand?” He asks and you say with a nod, “Fun! It’s in your job title and everything right?”

“You got me there. Glad I am living up to my potential!” He concedes and you finally take a sip of your drink and holy shit it is really good, fruity and strong but not in an off putting way. You pull it back from your face and ask, “Wow! This is delicious, did you make it yourself?”

“I did! My own recipe believe it or not, sometimes fucking around behind the bar pays off.” He seemed to appreciate the compliment. “Well keep it up, you’re making it hard for me to want a drink made by anyone else.”

“Then don’t, come bug me whenever you are thirsty.”

You take him up on the offer and thus you and Sam end up talking and spending way more time together. More conversations happen and one day, when he is on duty at the swim up bar at the pool, you were in your bathing suit, sitting on one of the stools that was in the water and chatting, “Hey Sammy?”

“Mmm?” He hums in acknowledgment, eyes flicking up briefly from his task of cutting up lemon wedges.

“You like your job?” You ask, the curly straw sitting in your tiki mug resting on your lips. He smiles and says, “Yeah! I love my job. I love working here, what I do, the island is my home. I’m really happy here.”

“Good! I’m glad!” You say, honestly and he asks, “Why do you wanna know?”

You tell him, “Just been thinking lately about how you are always so concerned with everyone else having fun, I was wondering, who is ensuring that YOU are having fun.”

How fucking sweet was that. He pauses cutting, he wasn’t expecting you to say this but he is quick on his feet and he says, “I got it handled don’t worry, if I am in charge of fun for the whole island that means I am in charge of my fun too.”

You stick your tongue out, “Boo! Bullshit, you need someone who can take some of that weight off your shoulders. You already worry about everyone’s happiness too often.” Something you could relate far too much to.

“Cuz it’s my job!” He exclaims with a gesture of the knife in one hand and you pile on, leaning closer over the bar, “But you need someone to look after you!”

“What do you suggest I do in this case?” He asks, maintaining eye contact he leans closer too and you say, “I should be your fun buddy! Let me be the person making sure you are having a good time.”

“Have you ever thought that ensuring everyone else’s good time IS my good time?” He says and you scoff, “Okay even if you do love your work it is still work. Stop deflecting. Yes or no?”

“Okay, okay I can admit that maybe the idea has some appeal. But, again I don’t think it is needed!” You cut him off, “It’ll improve my experience and make sure I have the most fun possible! How about that?”

That makes him stop. Well shit, a loophole. You got him. He gives in, “Okay, if it will help you have fun then it’s my job to listen.”

He reaches out, he takes your hand not holding the knife and asks sincerely, “Be my fun buddy while you are here on vacation?”

“Yes I will! You won’t regret it Sam!” You tell him excitedly and he laughs, his hand falling away, “You are right, I am sure I won’t.”

Sam is always so busy, constantly throwing himself into his work and activities and seemingly having a blast while doing it, there wasn’t any real opportunity for you to step in and try to make him have fun, just as he said earlier, he seemingly had it covered. Still you were not convinced, a nagging thought that something was off.

You were watching him as he took a bungee cord and hooked it around two people, forcing them to be pressed together, chest to chest on the dance floor. You watch the body language, the eye contact, flushing skin, tentative touch and greetings, all instigated by him, a built in meet cute thanks to him. Sam was so good at that, you would see him set up people and consistently after he introduced them and put them in some situation where they had to talk, play a game or get to know each other? You’d see them hanging out long after whatever scenario he forced them into, you wondered just how many people have fucked on vacation here solely because of him.

That’s it!

Hitting all at once you realise that Sam is always pairing up other people but you had never seen him with anyone. You’d see literally every other staff member hooking up with people, multiple people at once in some cases, whether fellow staff or guests but never Sam. You hadn’t hooked up with anyone yet yourself and that is the one thing you would say was missing from this vacation, this is how you could help him out. Besides, what is more fun than casual sex?

You made your move when he was in between tasks the following day, you caught him after doing the morning exercise salute and before breakfast was being served. You tapped on his shoulder after you caught up, “Heya Sammy!”

His head turned and he caught sight of you and said, “Oh! Hey! You having a good day so far?”

“It’s barely started Sam but so far? Yeah, I’m feeling good.” You admit with a shrug, you and he were walking and talking now.

“I bet, you slept in, right? I missed you at the crab walk.” He teased and you said, “Went for an early swim, I still got some moving in, don’t worry.”

“Good! Being active is important, you know?” A good enough segue. “I couldn’t agree more, being active is important so I wanted to ask. How sexually active are you?”

That made him stop in his tracks. You stop too. He looked confused and then asked slowly, “I’m…I’m sorry?”

“I asked how sexually active are you?”

“I. I don’t know how to respond, where is this coming from?” He asked and you started walking again, motioning for him to follow, “I was watching you the other day, thinking about it, being your designated fun buddy, and it seems you were right. You got a really good handle on having a lot of fun and a good time!”

“Uh-huhhh, but?” He starts and you cut in, “But, I noticed I never see you with anybody! Are you not hooking up with anyone? Are you like, against the idea of casual sex?”

“What? No! Not against it or anything I just-I get caught up in my work.” He started to defend himself and you cut him off, “Alright so I was right! You aren’t fucking anyone!”

“Christ! Not so fucking loud.” He looked around to make sure no one could overhear, visibly relaxing when he was sure no one had, “How do you think it would look if the fun police is too preoccupied getting everyone else laid to get any himself? It’s totally pathetic.”

“So do you actually care about not getting any or just how it would look if other people knew?” You asked and he sighed, “I do care! I just get so wrapped up in everything else I don’t think of it often, alright?”

“All your fellow staff members are getting it regularly so what is your excuse?”

His hands gesture as if it will hopefully make his point stronger, “Well I’m a lot better at my job than any of them so-”

“Really? Cuz I thought your job was all things fun? Isn’t no strings attached vacation fuck fests fun? Aren’t you supposed to lead by example?”

He stops again, a hand on your shoulder effectively stopping you too, “Where are you going with this? Did you stop me just to insult me for not getting any pussy or?”

“No! God, no! I stopped you to tell you that I have come up with a solution!”

“Oh I am dying to hear this. Lay it out.” He insists and you say, “I’m suggesting as your fun buddy that you and I fuck.”

Jaw drops open slightly and brows knit together and he says, “What?”

“I said, we should fuck! It can be that totally casual fun, no risk or strings attached kind of fucking that this resort is known for.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” He asks and you say, “Seriously! I am gonna be going home in a week, so we can just let loose! I think it will be good for you.”

“From fun buddies to fuck buddies just like that-” He snaps his fingers for emphasis, “,huh? Just, turn it on and go?”

“Exactly. I think it will wake up the ol libido, get you out of your slump and then you can fuck other guests after I leave cuz you will have the want to pursue, that craving and urge you will need to satisfy.”

“Are you my or my dick’s fun buddy?” He asks and you laugh, “Both! Now c’mon, what do you say?”

“I say you’ve clearly put a lot of thought into this.” He says with a sigh, a hand running through his hair, he eyes you up and down before asking, “How do you know I would even be into such an arrangement?”

“Sam. I have eyes. I’ve seen you staring when I’m in my bathing suit and I am sure you’ve seen me staring too.” Your eyes drop down before coming back up to meet his gaze, saying confidently, “Also you are embarrassingly hard in your cargo shorts right now during this conversation.”

His eyes snap down too before he says with a nod, “Okay. Fair point.”

“So! Good, glad we are in agreement, I’m going to get breakfast, I’ll meet up with you later and we can bang this out.” You clapped him on the shoulder and then stepped away with a grin, a wave over your shoulder as you walked towards the restaurant, “Try not to cream yourself thinking about me, alright? I want that load all for myself.”

He was left standing there dumbfounded. This was so much to deal with, you were so cool, he knew that, but you being so casual and confident, unbothered at the same time, concerned for him and so sexually forward, the mix of it is enough to make his head spin. How was he supposed to focus on work today?

As you walked towards getting some food you felt proud of yourself, excited for later on. You agree with the stance of fuck the police but you didn’t think you’d ever take it so literally, you wonder if he’d like that joke, he probably would roll his eyes and call it terrible but still laugh at it. As you are walking by the pool you glance down at the hot tub, the one where the glass sides of the jacuzzi show into the bar/nightclub area, visible from the dance floor and you know that is where it’s gotta happen. You can’t wait to show him just how long you can hold your breath underwater.

#Machete Sam X reader #club dread x reader #slasher x reader #BHF writing #Enjoy this silly joke fic #Maybe it will get a part two someday of the actual fucking!

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