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yandere-sins · 5 years ago

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Could I request some yandere Sukuna from jjk crushing on one of Yutadoris sorcerer teachers and before she realises it, sukuna has taken over yutadoris body and I’ll let you decide the ending

Thank you for requesting! :3 I hope you enjoy it! Sukuna is second best boy for me from the series so I am always excited for him ^-^

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Up till now, you hadn’t had the chance to build an opinion on the creature that Itadori was. Perhaps, it wasn’t your place to judge him at all, but having been assigned as one of the people teaching him the ways of the Sorcerers, you almost felt obligated to have some kind of opinion.

The truth was, he was a good kid. Anyone with a few social skills could see that. Though he was young, he took what he was doing at the Jujutsu High seriously, and despite being immensely chipper, for someone who would be executed at some point, he wasn’t a bother to have around. Even if this wasn’t the way of life he wanted, he pretty much committed to it now.

And yet, of course, you feared him.

You feared that someday, he wouldn’t be able to keep the threat residing inside of him at bay. You feared he was a ticking bomb on two legs, no matter how well he appeared to have it under control. No one could assume what was going on beneath that carefree expression and cheerful smile. What Sukuna was doing underneath the farce that was this sweet boy.

At first, you thought it would get better the more you knew him. The first meeting had made all hairs on your body stand up straight, but even then, you didn’t run from it. You might have looked pretty disgusted the first time Sukuna spoke up through a mouth on Itadori’s cheek, but otherwise, you had kept your composure.

No matter if you were a graduate from this school, or if they trusted into your abilities enough to teach the kids, or if you believed in yourself and your skills, it all meant nothing when you thought that you’d have to restrain the monster hiding inside of Itadori. How long would you be able to withstand it? A second? Two? You could be relieved if Sukuna made a quick process of you, but you feared he wouldn’t.

Glancing over your shoulder, you watched Itadori jotting down the things you were writing for him on the board. A yawn escaped him casually before he went back to taking his notes. He looked just like any other student. As if he was taking a typical class on an everyday topic, but you couldn’t shake the feeling. You knew you were being watched.

The thought that it wasn’t Itadori who watched you was actually worse than if it was him.

Sighing, you brought your eyes back forth to the blackboard, simply hoping that it was just your imagination running wild. You really, really did not want it to be true. However, sorcerers were specialists when it came to cursed spirits. You should have known better than to push away your intuition like that.

On the other side of the room, Yuji couldn’t help but wipe some sweat off his brow, relieved that you didn’t see it. Sukuna - as always - was a pain in the ass to deal with. If he wasn’t running his mouth, he at least seemed to think he deserved to see what was going on, eyes crawling over Yuji’s skin no matter how hard he tried to stop them.

Turning his head, shielding the eyes with his hand - nothing ended his attempts. Yuji was so glad that you were focused on your task of teaching him, refusing to spoil him with your gaze all the time. Why Sukuna decided to take an interest in you, not even Yuji had been able to get that question out of the cursed spirit. However, every lesson it got worse. Usually, Sukuna would stay put if it wasn’t Fushiguro that Yuji was talking to, but you seemed to make him restless.

Catching a glimpse of the clock over the door, he sighed in relief. Only ten more minutes left before this would be over once more. Even though Yuji had no problem talking, you and he had yet to really get to know each other. You were careful, and with Sukuna acting up, so was Yuji. He almost expected you to not like him very much for apparent reason, so how in the world could he have explained to you what was going on without it freaking you out?

“Hey, I think you shouldn’t teach me anymore because Sukuna is stirring up my body!” sounded weird AND suspicious. It would have probably earned him a re-evaluation or execution right away. Yuji knew that if he wasn’t able to control Sukuna anymore, that would be his end, and he had yet to reach his goal. He should have told you then and there, but something held him back.

Something that decided it was time for more action than sitting out this precious time with you.

Yuji’s hand tensed before it drove forward hard, letting go of the pen between his fingers. With a tender click, it fell to the ground, rolling towards you and catching your attention. Surprised, you glanced at Itadori, who smiled nervously at you, clutching his own hand, and you raised a brow, wondering if he was having a cramp or something.

Picking up the pen, you walked over to your student to return it, putting it in front of him on his desk, as Itadori managed an awkward, “Thank you!” while trying to take it. His movements seemed unnatural, sort of revolting as you could see his muscles tense and release beneath his skin. This was weird, right? You weren’t imagining things this time, or were you?

The answer was taken from you as his hand suddenly flinched, body jolting over the table to grab for your wrist, and you barely had the time to react. You knew what you had to do, jujutsu was like second nature for you, but the surprise hit harder now that your body was actually trying to have an opinion on Itadori.

Still, you were going in for the kill. If it had to be you or the boy, then you were your priority, no matter how much your heart already seemed to regret having to do this. What you didn’t expect was... he was faster. “Ita--?” you managed to press out before you were hit roughly in your face.

Your eyes shut close as his second hand reached for your head, fingers clawing into your hair and skin, sinking into the hollows of your skull and digging in. Despite it all, you managed to open your eyes again, one covered by the palm and clouded in darkness, the other one staring right into what you hoped - and at the same time feared - where two red irises staring back; Two that belonged to the same face, but different pairs of eyes.

“Unfortunately, I think this lesson ends prematurely. A shame, I do like watching you even if it’s just from the back.”

Even though you could not assign the voice to anyone you met before, your body froze up almost instantly as you watched the face back away from you, showing you half of a lopsided grin. The expression spreading out on his face was none you would have thought Itadori was capable of. “You can’t blame the boy, he was trying so hard to keep me away from you,” the person before you spoke, and the unappreciated realization of who was standing in front of you took over your mind.

Sukuna.

Almost instantly, as you thought his name, black marks began to spread over Itadori’s skin, crawling deep down to his chest and appearing back on this arms. “I finally found a fine woman, and yet it took me months to get to you. We have to commend him for that, don’t we?”

The more he talked, the less you felt incapable of moving. Despite the fear feeling like a blizzard freezing you up, you warmed your body with thoughts of who you were. You were a graduate of this very same school. You had survived so many spirits, but seen so many good men fall. If this was your turn to die, you wouldn’t go down like prey in the eyes of your hunter.

Gripping his wrist with both your hands, his grip tightened unbearably so, but you pressed the words out of your mouth anyway. “What do you want?” you brought forth through gritted teeth, and Sukuna’s lips curled into an almost pleasant, yet condescending smile. “Just you,” he explained, suddenly letting go of your face, making you stumble forward.

But the next moment, you felt his pointer against your forehead. In a wondrous moment of clarity, you realized what was going on. You’d not let him have his way and give that spirit what he wanted, but it was too late to make use of your abilities and blow off his arm or your own head in an attempt to flee. All you got was darkness and the feeling of everything around you collapsing to the ground as you blacked out.

“Fuck,” you winced as your mind slowly regained conscience. The ground you were laying on could only be described as fluid, but it wasn’t wet at all. Nevertheless, when you opened your eyes, you jolted up and into a seat, seeing all the red that covered the surroundings. If not for the buzzing energy of this place, you might have thought you were dead. With the memories of the happenings returning to you as you tried to remember, you wished you actually were.

“Finally awake, I see,” a voice called out, amusement and mockery laying in its tone. Your eyes caught the sight of the hundreds of skulls first before it managed to lift high enough to see the special grade cursed spirit splayed out enthroned on them. “Welcome to my world,” he grinned, and it made a shudder run down your spine while you began glancing around carefully.

“What did you do?” you asked, seeing nothing but darkness and bones wherever you looked. “Why am I here?”

“Ah, so many questions,” Sukuna sighed, your head snapping forward as you heard footsteps in front of you. “Isn’t it great that we’ll have a lot of time to clear them up?”

You didn’t react to this, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of knowing you would humor him. Still, you eyed his hand suspiciously as he squatted down, reaching out to caress your face. You almost feared a cut from his sharp nail along your cheek, but nothing happened, and you noticed his eyes almost transfixed on his finger on your skin. “Where’s my body?”

“Safe,” he mumbled, appearing to be in thought. But just as quickly, his eyes snapped up to meet yours again. “Figured it out already, haven’t you?”

“What could someone like you want from my soul, even dragging it here for no apparent reason?”

“Told you, didn’t I? I just want you; the rest is a surprise!”

Standing up again, Sukuna spread his arms open as if he was inviting you in to them. “Don’t be so stiff, Darling. We’ll have fun here!”

“Darling?!” you croaked in disbelieve, spouting the words which were absolutely revolting to you. “Don’t worry,” Sukuna chuckled.

“You’ll come to like me soon enough.”

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chanoyu-to-wa · 5 years ago

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Nampō Roku, Book 5 (58): Two Poetic Aphorisms Related to the Practice of Kane-wari, Attributed to Rikyū¹.

58) [Two aphorisms in poetic form related to the practice of kane-wari, that were written on the back side of the document translated in the previous post; and attributed to Rikyū by Tachibana Jitsuzan².]

￮ [From] the chigai-dana [違棚], ō-toko [大床], shoin [書院], [to the] wabi-zashiki [ワヒ座シキ = ワビ座敷], [the arrangement of the utensils] is based on the five kane of the daisu³.

￮ In the small room, as well as in a room of one-thousand mats, the numbers of objects [displayed] should be based on the daisu’s nanatsu-kumi [七つ組]⁴.

(These two poems were written on the back of the sheet of paper on which the previous manuscript was written. The poems were composed by Rikyū, and inscribed with his own brush⁵.)

_________________________ ◎ As with the previous document (on which they were written), these poems are probably spurious, since the first utilizes the five-kane system (that was, in fact, favored by Rikyū), rather than the eleven-kane system that was mentioned in the document to which these poems were supposedly appended)*; while the language of the second one conflicts directly with details that are found in several of Rikyū’s own densho. ___________ *This does not necessarily preclude this poem’s having been composed by Rikyū. Indeed, writing a poem that was commonly believed (at that time) to have been written by Rikyū would argue for the authenticity of a forgery.

¹According to the postscript appended to this entry, the poems were attributed to Rikyū by Tachibana Jitsuzan, apparently based on the handwriting, and the fact that they were written on the back of the letter (or densho) explaining the different kinds of kane-wari -- that was translated in the previous post.

²This entry was not provided with a title in the Enkaku-ji manuscript (or in any of the other versions of the text).

The use of the waka form was intended to make the details easier to remember. This is why teachings (especially those that were important for the beginner) were often stated in poetic form.

³The first poem reads:

chigai-dana・ō-toko・shoin・wabi-zashiki moto ha daisu no itsutsu-kane nari

[違棚・大床・書院・ワヒ座シキモトハ臺子ノ五ツカネナリ].

“The chigai-dana, the ō-toko, the shoin, [and] the wabi-zashiki: the foundation of these are the five-kane of the daisu.”

⁴The text of the second poem is:

ko-zashiki mo sen-jō-shiki mo mono-kazu no moto ha daisu no nanatsu-kumi nari

[小座鋪モ千疊敷モ物數ノモトハ臺子ノ七ツ組ナリ].

“Also in the small room*, also in the thousand-mat room, the number of objects is based on the nanatsu-gumi of the daisu.”

Mono-kazu [物數] means the number of objects, how many things.

Nanatsu-gumi [七ツ組] is a machi-shū term, used in the Nampō Roku†, that refers to the “complete” arrangement of objects on the daisu: on the ji-ita, the furo, mizusashi, shaku-tate, koboshi, and futaoki; and on the ten-ita, the chaire and chawan.

In other words, the arrangement of objects on the chigai-dana, in the ō-toko, on the dashi-fu-zukue [出し文机] (the built-in writing desk, sometimes referred to as the tsuke-shoin [付書院] today), as well as in the wabi setting, all of these are based on the idea that the numbers should be yang (odd)‡ -- since yang numbers are auspicious.

About this poem, Tanaka Senshō writes**: “The number seven is a yang [i.e., an odd] number. Such numbers as seven, five, three, and so on, are auspicious numbers. For this reason, even in the small room, the toko, tana, and [things placed directly on the floor of the] room, the total number of objects displayed should follow the same pattern as the seven [utensils] that are displayed [on the daisu]. (It is important to point out that this [use of the number seven] has nothing to do with the seven-kane system that is employed in the inakama; therefore, one should be careful [not to confuse the one with the other].)

“But, having said that, the nanatsu-gumi of the daisu, and the seven-kane that are employed on the inakama-daisu: both make use the auspicious number seven. Likewise, this number seven is also found in the mitsu-ori [by adding the four interstitial kane], in the four seasons††, and so forth.

“When divided into two parts, [seven] yields three and four; or two and five. The number of objects can also be broken down into sets that have an auspicious meaning: one, two, three; or, seven, five, three, and so on. When you think about it, the root number is always the seven objects arranged on the daisu: from this [example of the daisu] comes the teaching that is described in this poem.”

However, the difficulty in accepting the authenticity of this poem has less to do with the meaning (which may well be authentic to the point of being a truism -- assuming we do not take the number “seven” too literally -- at least during the daytime), than with the terminology used in this poem -- which pointedly deviates from the usages prescribed, in detail, in several of Rikyū’s own densho‡‡. __________ *Ko-zashiki [小座鋪] is another way to write ko-zashiki [小座敷] that seems to have been favored (in certain circles) during the Edo period.

†This is used as an example used in the support of the argument that the Nampō Roku was written by Tachibana Jitsuzan by those scholars (who are by and large not affiliated with any of the modern tea schools) who prefer to hold that opinion. (Often these people prefer to keep this opinion to themselves, since publishing such things, in Japan, would be tantamount to committing professional suicide -- as can be attested by the repeated attacks that have been made on this blog, initiated by people affiliated with a certain modern school.)

‡Perhaps the full count should be yin (even) at night.

**此七ツの数は陽の数で、七五三抔と云ふて芽出度い数である。故に小座敷でも、床、棚、座敷、此合計の道具数を七ツ飾る事がある。是は田舎間の七ツ曲尺の問題とは何の関係も無い事である事に注意せねばならぬ。

けれども、台子の七ツ組、田舎間台子の七ツ曲尺、共に七と云ふ数の吉数である事には共通の思想がある。又此七ツを三ツ折、四季抔云ふて、三と四に二分したり、二と五に二分して、一二三、七五三抔と祝意を表する数に分解するのも、考へて見ると、其根元の数は台子の七ツ組と云ふ故実から起源して居ると云へると云ふ歌意である。

††Perhaps Tanaka is referring to the seven classical “seasons” that traditionally governed the practice of chanoyu:

◦ shun [春], spring (the planting season);

◦ u-zen [雨前], the month or so before the rainy-season begins (characterized by increasingly frequent overcast skies and rain);

◦ u-chū [雨中], during the rainy-season;

◦ u-go [雨後], the spell of intense heat that follows the end of the rainy-season;

◦ shū [秋], autumn (the harvest season);

◦ shō-kan [小寒], early winter;

◦ dai-kan [大寒], the period of intense cold that occurs around the beginning of the new year.

Or, perhaps (since he characterizes this as “the four seasons,” when, in fact, there are seven) he was not really clear about this ancient (and secret) series, and was simply relating something that his source (one of the last surviving of the Enkaku-ji scholars) had mentioned to him in passing (without that person’s having gone into the details).

This series of seasons is extremely important, since it defines the way that we stage a gathering at any given point during the year -- including how we select the utensils. Unfortunately, this is another teaching that has been lost to many of the modern schools.

‡‡According to Rikyū, nanatsu-kazari [七ツ餝] refers to the (1) kama, (2) furo, (3) mizusashi, (4) hishaku, (5) shaku-tate, (6) koboshi, and (7) futaoki (rather than to the (1) kama-furo, (2) mizusashi, (3) shaku-tate, (4) koboshi, (5) futaoki, (6) chaire, and (7) chawan, as used by the machi-shū).

Furthermore, he continues that the word kazari [餝] should be used when talking about the things arranged on the ji-ita, while kumi [組] should be used when discussing the things displayed on the ten-ita.

He then goes on to explain that this was all a secret teaching, the purpose of which was expressly to distinguish those persons who had been initiated into the orthodox teachings of the daisu, from those who had not -- the latter (he writes) being people who use nanatsu-gumi (to mean the furo and kaigu, plus the chaire and the chawan).

The machi-shū affiliated with Imai Sōkyū appear to have preferred this later terminology, and that is why it is commonly used by the modern schools.

It is because of differences such as these, between Rikyū's actual writings and what is found in the secondary sources (the Nampō Roku is, at best, a secondary source), that certain modern schools argue that Rikyū's actual writings are fake, while the documents that they cherish (which are largely the writings derived from the machi-shū tradition) are the only true representation of the ancient teachings.

⁵Kono uta ni-shu ha migi no kami no hiki-kaeshi tokoro ni ari. Rikyū no ji-ei ji-hitsu [此歌二首ハ右ノ紙ノ引カヘシノ所ニアリ、利休自詠自筆].

“With respect to these two poems, they were [found] on the back side of the page mentioned at the right. [They were] self-composed [and] self-written by Rikyū.”

The poems were written on the back side of the sheet on which the drawings of the various sorts of kane-wari were found. Rikyū both composed the poems, and inscribed them there “with his own brush.”

According to Shibayama Fugen, this note was appended by Tachibana Jitsuzan. Tanaka Senshō, while he does not explicitly ascribe the authorship to Jitsuzan, notes that it was written in the margin of the page, in red ink.

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sportstotoblog · 5 years ago

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Web based Gambling

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The law identifying with web based betting in India should be comprehended inside the nation's socio-social setting. At the start, betting, in spite of the fact that not completely denied in India, doesn't get express support by arrangement creators. The Indian sorted out betting industry is evaluated to be worth around US$8 billion. While stringent laws have checked the expansion of club and high road gaming focuses as in numerous different nations, notwithstanding the territory of Goa, the lottery business remains the most post mainstream type of betting.

Despite the fact that betting isn't illicit, it is an exceptionally controlled and managed movement. Present day India is a semi government Constitutional vote based system and the forces to administer are dispersed at the administrative just as the state levels. Betting highlights in List II of the Constitution of India, this infers the state governments have the power to institute laws so as to direct betting in the particular states. In this way, there is no single law overseeing betting in the whole nation. Various states have various laws overseeing betting notwithstanding the laws that have an application the nation over. While a few states have restricted lotteries, different states permit state government lotteries showcased and disseminated in other lottery playing and advancing states through private substances.

Guideline of betting

The courts have characterized betting as 'the installment of a cost for an opportunity to win a prize'. The prevailing component of ability or chance will decide the idea of the game. A game might be esteemed to bet if the component of possibility or karma prevails in choosing its result. Accordingly, Indian courts have held that wagering on horse dashing and a couple of games are not betting. The privilege to attempt the matter of betting and lotteries isn't considered as a basic right secured by the Constitution of India. It might anyway be called attention to that the state government run lotteries make critical commitments to the state exchequer of a few state governments and the Union government, and henceforth there is a protection from complete denial.

The accompanying enactment is appropriate to betting:

The Public Gaming Act, 1867

This Act gives discipline to open betting and for keeping of a 'typical gaming house'. This Act additionally approves the state governments to sanction laws to direct open betting in their individual purviews. The corrective enactments in separate states have been changed as per their approach on betting. In any case, this enactment doesn't have any immediate effect on internet betting except if a wide elucidation is given to the meaning of normal gaming house in order to incorporate virtual gatherings also.

The Indian Contract Act, 1872 (ICA)

The ICA is an arranged umbrella enactment that oversees every business contract in India. Under the ICA, a betting agreement is the one which can't be authorized. The Act sets down; 'Understandings by method for bet are void, and no suit will be brought for recuperating anything asserted to be won on any bet or depended to any individual to submit to the consequence of any game or other questionable occasion on which any bet is made'. Betting, lottery and prize games have held to bet agreements and in this manner void and unenforceable. While a betting agreement isn't illicit, it can't be implemented in a courtroom. Hence, the courts won't engage any reason for activity that emerges out of a betting agreement.

Lotteries (Regulation) Act, 1998

This Act gives a system to sorting out lotteries in the nation. Under this Act, the state governments have been approved to advance just as disallow lotteries inside their regional ward. This Act additionally accommodates the way where the lotteries are to be led and endorses discipline if there should arise an occurrence of rupture of its arrangement. Lotteries not approved by the state have been made an offense under the Indian Penal Code. A few non-lottery playing states, similar to Gujarat and Uttar Pradesh, have restricted the clearance of other state-government lotteries under this Act.

Indian Penal Code, 1860

Area 294A arrangements with keeping lottery office. It says that whoever keeps any office or spot to draw any lottery not being a State lottery or a lottery approved by the State Government, will be rebuffed with detainment of either portrayal for a term which may stretch out to a half year, or with fine, or with both.

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Web betting

The law identified with betting is additionally material to web based betting. All betting agreements are viewed as betting agreements and it is beyond the realm of imagination to expect to uphold such agreements under the ICA, nitty gritty above.

As brought up before, the online lottery is the most mainstream type of web betting in India. Most organizations promoting and dispersing or leading state government-supported lotteries through the web are not permitted to sell their administrations in the states that restricted lotteries. By and large, these advertisers and wholesalers limit their online administrations to purchasers who are inhabitants of the states where a lottery is allowable. Despite the reality there has been no revealed instance of break by any organization advancing on the web lotteries, a large portion of these organizations (as a shield) look for an endeavor from their customers identifying with their living arrangement.

There have been examples where one state has restricted the lottery of different states, including on the web lotteries. In an ongoing case, the Karnatka High Court maintained the choice of the Karnataka government to make itself a 'lottery free zone' by forcing a restriction on lotteries of every single other state, including on the web lotteries under the Lotteries (Regulation) Act 1998. The state government, for this situation, coordinated the conclusion of the terminals and booths selling the online lotteries.

Authorization over remote locales

On the off chance that the sites are facilitated and worked from outside India, it might be hard for the Indian specialists to give any mandate to shut them down or deny their entrance without utilizing its blocking powers under the ITA. The specialists have little to stress over, as Indian remote trade laws don't allow settlements outside India for betting related action, for example, the acquisition of lottery tickets, football pools and sweepstakes. Therefore, a betting site facilitated outside India targeting getting cash from inside India can't do as such through legitimate channels.

End

Internet betting stays an exceptionally managed part with apparently restricted skylines to develop. While the present administrative structure makes it hard for seaward betting sites to target clients in India, the India-based organizations can just appropriate and showcase state-government lotteries online in allowed regions. The inescapable authority with the administration to square betting related sites and the inconceivability of upholding betting related agreements further debilitate the possibilities for the business.

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douchebagbrainwaves · 6 years ago

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Wufoo seem to have a stateless algorithm. If you do that? One reason is that you may not get any reward in the forseeable future. It's that death is the default for startups, and in particular the most successful founders tend to work on them, and why startups do things that ordinary companies don't, like raising money and getting acquired. If your terms force startups to do things that make you stupid, and if not it doesn't matter whether you fund them, because with our help they could make money. They really seemed to believe this, and it will save you if anything can. And you know, when it comes to avoiding errands. Wealth When I was in grad school, one of their fellow students was on the receiving end of a question from their faculty advisor that we still quote today. To anyone who knows Mark Zuckerberg that is the reductio ad absurdum of the initial idea is the meta-fact that these are hard to solve, and the noise stops.

Nothing will teach you about angel investing like experience.6 Restrictiveness I think most hackers know what it means for a language to feel restrictive.7 Most investors decide in the first stage of a startup's life, when you have a thesis about what everyone else in it is overlooking. Most intellectual dishonesty is unintentional. I'm not proposing this is a serious idea. It's even the answer to questions that seem unrelated, like how to convince investors. In Lisp, functions are a data type just like integers or strings.8

But as long as they still have to show up for work every day, they care more about what they do at home. What it means, roughly, is don't do anything weird.9 And if you weren't rich, you took the omnibus or walked.10 That sounds like a joke, but it seems to be c, that people will pay them for. I've read that Java has just overtaken Cobol as the most popular language.11 Whereas a two year old company raising a series A round from Sequoia.12 Good hackers can always get some kind of job. And it is a tradeoff that you'd want to make. 3% of your net worth. Countries worried about their competitiveness are right to be concerned about the number of elements, where an element is anything that would be the ones to look to for new ideas: Forth, Joy, Icon.

I suppose that's bound to yield an alarming book. All the unfun kinds of wealth creation slow dramatically in a society that confiscates private fortunes. Notice I've been careful to talk about their previous startup idea while they were working at their day jobs.13 Are there walkable neighborhoods? Lisp. It would hurt YC's brand at least among the innumerate if we invested in huge numbers of risky startups that flamed out.14 I know the afternoon is going to invest. Or don't take any extra classes, and just build things. Along with good tools, hackers want interesting projects.15 If they can realize before other investors that some apparently unpromising startup isn't, they can make a difference.16

Notes

Which means if the company than you meant to. In a series A termsheet with a toothbrush. Some want to lead.

Similarly, don't destroy the startup is rare. A knowledge of human anatomy. His critical invention was a kid, this is not merely blurry versions of great things were created mainly to make software incompatible.

I didn't realize it till I started using it, there were no strong central governments. Once the playing field is leveler politically, we'll see economic inequality is a list of where to see the apples, they tend to notice them. CEOs were J. Founders are often compared to what you write has a word meaning how one feels when that partner re-tells it to steal a few months later Google paid 1.

A investor has a sharp drop in utility. But he got there by another path.

And while they think are bad: Webpig, Webdog, Webfat, Webzit, Webfug. There's a sort of love is as blind as the web have sucked—9. Even in English, our contact at Sequoia, was no more than make them want you.

Incidentally, the effort that would appeal to investors.

Enterprise software.

We're delighted to have moments of adversity before they ultimately choose not to make you expend as much the effect of this essay, but its inspiration; the critical path that they create rather than insufficient effort to make money, then work on Wall Street were in 2000, because for times over a hundred years or so, even in their heads a giant house of cards is tottering. So it is probably no accident that the applicant pool gets partitioned by quality rather than making the things you're taught.

Even Samuel Johnson seems to have been a time. IBM.

Our founder meant a photograph of a more general rule: focus on their ability but women based on revenues of 1. Managers are presumably wondering, how much effort on sales. When the Air Hits Your Brain, neurosurgeon Frank Vertosick recounts a conversation reaches a certain field, it's probably a real poet.

Kant. In this context, issues basically means things we're going to have to give you term sheets.

All you have a standard piece of casuistry for this essay, I have so far. As a friend with small children, or want tenure, avoid the topic. I'm compressing the story a bit more complicated, because sometimes artists unconsciously use tricks by imitating art that does.

That may require asking, because she liked the outdoors? Imagine the reaction might be a founder, more people you can skip the first version would offend.

Pliny Hist.

Different people win at that game. Unfortunately these times are a handful of VCs even have positive returns. None at all. It does at least should make the fund by succeeding spectacularly.

In fact since 2 1. Learning for Text Categorization. The first version was mostly Lisp, because time seems to be doctors? We care about.

5 notes · View notes

fightingorcavingintodepression · 6 years ago

Text

1/16/17 5:17 pm

I had my first panic attack I've had in a long time. I've gotten so bad at work my manager called me at 10AM and left a voicemail. I called him back and said I had a Doctors appointment and forgot to send out an email to the team. I hate lying, but i can’t realistically say I'm suicidal and won't even get out of bed every morning.

I ran to the bathroom and started dry-heaving for a good 2-3 minutes. Then I laid down on my bed and felt like crying, and then Stayed there for nearly another hour.

Kill me.

1/20/17

I'm eating lunch by myself at 3:06 on Friday. I've only hit myself a few times today. I ordered and shipped a present to Shara and it should get there tomorI'mrow, but today is her birthday. I deleted my Facebook and haven't been posting on tumblr, so I'm avoiding everything. I feel guilty and don't know what to do. I'm going to stop typing because I'm tearing up in the restaurant. I'm pushing all of my friends away. I saw Selina last weekend and it was so awkward. I can't even hang out with my best friend without it being awkward. I want to kill myself.

Please let me die in an accident.

10:56 pm I want to keep hitting myself until I don't wake up.

1/25/17 Wednesday 11:39pm

I'm at McDonald's getting a milkshake and food. I've "worked" from home the past three days because I don't wake up till 9 or 10. That's a lie, I'll wake up and hit snooze, but won't force myself into up. On Monday I stayed online till 11:30 and then said o had a doctors appointment and was gong to wfh the rest of the day, but the last two days I haven't even sent anything out. I deserve to get fired. My depression is destroying me.

1/26/17 Thursday 2:30pm

I woke up late at 8:50ish and got online. Did the scheduled work for Austin and once that was finished, drove into the office and got in at about 10:30 (I think). I ate lunch at my desk and I've gone back and forth to the bathroom and just sat. Only work I've done today is finally send an email I've needed to for weeks. Mom asked me to call her at lunch and I finally said I didn't really want to celebrate my birthday. I told her I'd decide on a weekend and give her a call tonight, but I'm not sure I can. It's now 2:48. I've been in the bathroom almost 20 minutes.

2/16 4:29pm

I woke up at 3:30 am and stayed awake, but then fell asleep and didn't get online from home until about 9:40. Came into the office about 12:40. I've done maybe an hours worth of work. I really hate myself. When driving into work nearly had an accident from someone driving recklessly and me not just letting them pass me. They cut to my right into a lane for cars getting on and drove on the side of the road to pass me since I didn't slow down. The driver even had people (possibly kids) in the back of their car. I hate myself, but that person as well if they can justify that type of driving that also may harm their own kids, let alone other people. I started yelling again in my car...it's getting worse.

I hit myself again this morning in the shower.

2/17 12:18am

I can see myself committing suicide within the next year. Depending if I don't get better, maybe not till after my parents pass.

2/20 12:33pm

I didn't get up again today (Monday) until 9:50 and log online. Then finally came in to the office about 10 minutes ago. Off to a bad start of the week. I should be fired. I did "clean" a good portion of my apartment yesterday because at&t suppose to be coming this week. It's still a terrible mess, but you can finally see the floor now. Next is the kitchen.

1:04pm - eating lunch by myself at wich which. Postponing going back to the office. Not sure if taking these notes is beneficial, or even a smart idea (hint, it's not)

2/21 12:31pm

Late again. Thinking of working from home tomorrow. Getting worse. Really worse. Spent too much money yesterday on gifts I'll probably never give.

2/24 11:52am

It's my birthday. Today hasn't been a bad day.

2/28 12:15 pm

In training. Feeling useless. My back is also killing me. Have my APA later today. Guess I'll find out how badly I'm doing or if we'll just pretend I'm doing fine when it's obvious I'm not. Not likely I'll get fired since I'm an ITA, but don't know. Just haven't been given a warning or anything

3/13 12:48pm

I'd been doing okay for a little while. Starting to get worse again. Started saying things again. Didn't wake up for work till 9ish. Didn't get in till 11ish. Need to stop. Want to hurt myself. Want to kill myself. Fighting it. Still doing bad. In the bathroom wanting to hit myself. Shara texted about doing stuff this weekend, and I almost want to back out. I'm suppose to do Aerials with gabby tonight, but want to use my weight as an excuse and say I'm over their limit (which may actually be true, but their website doesn't say and no one picked up when I called), or that I don't have the right clothes, or I'm having a panic attack (probably closest to being honest). And one of the other things that's bugging me in the back of my head today I'm hating myself most of all for it even bothering me.

3/20 4:39am

Mild depression acting up. Want to "call/email" out of work. Smacking myself a bit the past day

3/22 6:14pm

Didn't go into work today and haven't done any work so far. Needing to get a report and presentation done before tomorrow. Depression has been really bad this week. Sleep is getting off. Whispering harmful things to myself and hitting myself more often.

3/24 10:44am

I want to hurt myself. I'm doing really badly this week. No point even coming into work. Can tell I'm being replaced in all areas. Went to lunch with people. Faked it. Now I'm back at the office (2:04pm) and hiding in the bathroom. I feel like I'm gonna pass out. I want to pass out.

I want to die.

3/25 5:02pm

Doing bad today too. Didn't get up till noon. Went to the park to walk, but had negative thoughts the entire time and it didn't help. Convinced myself to go out to dinner at Las Margaritas that I normally get take out from. I plan to make myself sit in the living room when I get home to get out of my bedroom/bed. It feels pathetic, but right now the smallest things feel like an achievement.

3/27 1:41am

I want to kill myself. I just want it to end. I don't want to hurt my family though. I wish I could make them forget i existed so I wouldn't feel guilty about it.

3:06am still lying awake on the couch. The longer I stay awake, the longer I postpone till tomorrow comes.....or that's how it feels. Ready to kill myself.

3/30 8pm

I now weigh 245 pounds. I write this as I sit in line at chick fil-a getting a meal for two people and a milkshake

3/31 6:38

Deleted all of my social media. Specifically tumblr, which I can't reactive. Gone forever.

4/6 1:12pm

Was doing better for a bit because work was busy enough to distract me. Getting too busy now. Think I overheard two people saying they don't want to work with me, and storage team disregards my existence. It's a new feeling when I feel like I'm doing some good work, but know I'm also doing terrible in other areas and people no longer want to work with me. Hitting hard and really want to hurt myself again. I need to make some life choices before I end up committing suicide.

4/7 1:36pm

It might be good to just quit before June. If I sold everything I had, I could pay off all my debt. I'd be left with nothing, but wouldn't leave anything for people to worry about.

4/17 10:21am

So overwhelmed.

4/19 9:08am

Sitting on toilet at home. So overwhelmed at work. Can't get anything done and nothing is going right.

6/1 11:02am Thursday

Hadn't been in the office in almost a week. Had Friday off and Monday for Memorial Day, but lied and said Tom had knee surgery on Tuesday and then wfh on Wednesday. Getting bad again. Realized I hadn't been writing in here for a month and a half. Not sure if that's a good win or not, since I mostly only remember to when I'm getting bad again.

6/25 2:15am

Depression getting bad again. Suicide would be nice. Just want it all to end. If I could sleep for a year, I'd take it.

6/27 12:40pm

Didn't go into work until almost 11 yesterday. Working from home today. Can't even answer a phone call. Have a meeting at 2 and then will probably shower as unavailable the rest of the day.

6/28 3:06pm

Woke up at 5 and still didn't go into work today. Stayed showing as away all day and said I had issues with Skype and car issues

7/14 12:50pm

JB texted me asking if I was off. I should just kill myself. Lying through my teeth. His pa

7/18 3:28am Tuesday

I want to die in an accident so no one I care about thinks it was a suicide.

7/20 1:59pm

Didn't go into work until 12 today. While I was in the shower, my phone range and I just started cursing thinking it was my manager. Already had my lie made up going to say my car stalled this morning coming into work. Didn't have my phone (which is why I didn't pick up if it was them), but luckily a cop pulled over and called a tow truck....

Haven't had to use my lie yet, but going to use parts of it tonight to get out of going to a coworkers house for game night.

I really hate myself.

I need to call in my medicine to see if they'll prescribe it again, even if it doesn't seem like it's helping.

7/31 9:04pm

In line at Taco Bell. Didn't go into work today or Friday. Meant to send an email saying I was taking my mom to doctors and would be back Tuesday, but overslept and didn't bother. Don't want to go in tomorrow either. I haven't been replying to Shara and I feel terrible, but I'm not in a good place either. Hadn't been replying to family until Mom called worried and acted like I just forgot to hit send on some texts. It's easier to act like nothing is wrong with people who don't know I'm not good mentally. I saw a post on Tumblr that describe what I'm feeling. I'm pushing people away so it's easier when I want to kill myself.

9/5 11:42am

Moved to new apartment. Enjoying it so far. Had a 5 day weekend from labor/took Thursday and Friday off to move. 1st day back at work and already feeling overwhelmed and counting down till 4:30. Kill myself creeping inside my head again.

9/21 10:02am

Want to die. Want to die. I just really want to die. Kill myself. Kill myself. I'm so tempted to kill myself. I'd make it look like an accident so not to hurt my family. But I need to find homes for Yen and Shani, or plan accordingly. Could drop them at a shelter, but include some cash to help care for them (1k?). Then someone who is a good person, but just had money trouble would take them. I'm not sure I'll live 15+ years to outlive them. I take that back; I know I won't. I don't even know sometimes if I'll make it to tomorrow. I'm not actually making any attempts or plans to do it, but every time I walk in to work or leave, I hope a car hits me. Kill me kill me I just want to die.

10/18 9:52am

Overslept and didn't go into work today. "Working" from home online. Depression episode kicking in again. I just want to die.

10/31 Tuesday 12:02pm

Didn't get into work until 11 today. Called into the 8:30 conference and answered some emails to appear like I was working, but hardly got out of bed. ~Read back through some of these notes just now and now I've got in the back of my head the idea of starting to hit myself again. I know this is a downward slope, but really want to go to the bathroom stall and do it anyways just so I don't feel numb. It's lunchtime, so no one should be there to hear it. ~~I ended up going to get rubber bands and paper clips instead. Still hit myself s few times, but people kept coming into the restroom while I was in the stall.~

11/1 2:16 pm

In drivethru for chick-fil-a. Working from home rest of week probably. My anger is terrible. Called someone a cunt in the drivethru for honking and it wasn't even at me. My window was down, so think the person in front of me may have heard. I'm a terrible person and hate myself.

11/16 9:14am Thursday

Just got into work. Feel exhausted and drained as always. Just noticed it’s coming up on a year in January when I started making these notes. I honestly don’t know if I’m doing better or not. I’d say I’m not. Definitely not.

12/5/17 2:36pm

It’s a Tuesday, and I’d not been in the office for two weeks (11/21) between workin from home on Wednesday because thanksgiving was the next day, off Thursday and Friday, and then all last week I just never came in. Yesterday I “worked” from home, and today I didn’t get in till about 12. And the only thing I wanted to think about while walking into work because I forgot my headphones and couldn’t drown out the thoughts with music was how I wanted to kill myself. I have a meeting from 3-4 with new agile team (honestly probably only real reason I forced myself into the office). I wonder how fake I can present myself today. Hopefully it won’t be terribly interactive and mostly just informational.

1/14/18 11:27pm

I didn’t go into work at all last week. Was online only Monday for the entire day, and then Wednesday for the day on do-not-disturb. Skipped Tuesday and Wednesday completely though. Need to force myself to go into the office tomorrow. I hate myself. So much to catch up on. I cleaned a bit of the apartment, but still need to do more. My oncall starts next week, and I pray it’s quiet.

1/22/18 3:10am

Won’t go to bed because then the morning comes faster. I’m oncall this week and I just pray nothing happens at all. Even one ticket. Please don’t. I think I have an appointment this Friday about my antidepressants, but honestly I’m not sure. Please let me be left alone this week and work from home. I’ll even make sure I get work done.

1/23/18 12:30am

I’m pathetic at work.

2/4/18 6:43pm Sunday

Out grocery shopping. Tried to do small talk. Wanted to help bag like I do sometimes, but not doing well, so just awkwardly typing this on my phone. I HAVE to get work done when I get home, but haven’t been doing well. I’ll be lucky if I get anything done or I do it in the middle of the night (especially with my sleep schedule).

2/5/18 11:52am

Didn’t get anything done last night, but was able to wake up early and get it submitted by 8 (only one other person has anything uploaded so far). What pisses me off is another teammate setup a meeting at 2 with no heads up. That little amount of time and a same day meeting? Fuck that shit. I’ll attend, but doubt John will and don’t blame him. I said I was going to the doctor earlier, so purposely missed the one actual meeting I had today. Couldn’t get out of bed. Hate myself. Submitted a service request for the lights to be fixed in my apartment, so that’s the one useful thing I’ve done. I was wrong, John did accept. I hate myself.

5/7/18 Monday 8:59am

On the train in to work. Only going in for the ITA orientation and then probably leaving. Probably will stay an hour to get hibachi for lunch and then leave. I’m oncall this week. Please please please don’t have any tickets or sde’s after hours. Please god. Just this once. I’ve been doing so well with my depression, but the last week and a half it’s been dipping again and I’m afraid. On the chart at my therapy office, id finally for the first time dipped below the number for being depressed! I know I’ll always have depression and depression slumps, but it’s scary going back into my first one after doing well for almost two months. I don’t want to go back into that. I really don’t. Please just don’t have my oncall this week go badly. Dear god, just please don’t. I don’t want to breakdown in tears from anxiety this week. Make my next oncall worse, but just let me not have to worry about anything this week. Please.

5/7/18 Monday 11:21am

Doing better mentally once I got in the office and moving. It’s sad how easily that change can happen. You’d think I’d be happy, but just makes me realize how easily I can drop again. Part of me knows I could stay at the office and continue working, but the other half doesn’t care. I’m eating hibachi and then taking the train home.

5/10/18 1:02pm

Finishing up lunch at hisaki and then going into office. Have to recount all of the WebLogic VM counts manually.....

All the work before I did is basically useless.

Time to go through 400+ (maybe less since a good number are in the shared environment) and find out their host count. I shouldn’t really be complaining. Just didn’t want to have to do/worry about anything till after my vacation.

Now it’s 1:32 and I’m sitting in the toilet just waiting for the day to end. Shoot myself shoot my self I just want to shoot my self.

5/23 5:12pm

Felt sick the past few days. Worked from home. Throat is killing me, but in line at McDonald’s and going to get

5/25 Friday 11:27am

Hardly worked at all this week. Ignored a voicemail to call back my PO. Work is frustrating me.

I just hit myself for the first time in a long time again. Chest, face, head. It felt good

5:57pm clenching my fists in drive through. Want to hurt myself

5/28 Monday 2:04pm Memorial Day off work

At the bbq place getting Togo food. Been in bed all day/all weekend really. Felt sick, but also depressed. Stomach was so upset, didn’t take antidepressants yesterday. Going to take them for today when I get back. Still, I’ve not been doing well at all. Hitting myself more. Mainly the chest. May even do it on the way home. Just feeling numb again. Started reblogging suicidal/depression posts on tumblr again. It’s pathetic. Like a cry for help to the two I know who are on tumblr, but one never acknowledges them, and the other rarely gets on anymore. I have therapy this Friday (o think?) and have no improvement to speak of to the doctor. Overslept one from depression, but rescheduled the last one due to work issues. Slit my throat. Want to die. Let it end. Started singing those little tunes to myself the last week or two. Want to hurt myself. Really just want to drop dead from an accident. Get someone to take care of my cats, and then my family won’t think it’s a suicide.

6/12 10:59am Tuesday

Sitting at train station going into work. Just got back from surgery follow up and everything is fine. Spent maybe 10 minutes there in total. Now I’m going into work to eat my unhealthy lunch hibachi chicken and soda as always. I’m sad all the team. I have an in person meeting from 2-2:50, but will probably leave after that. Unless I ask Carter if he needed help with patching and he says yes, which is why I’m considering if I even should?? Wow, that’s pathetic of me. I only have to make it till EOD Thursday. Then I’ll watch Lily for the weekend, have my therapy session on Friday, and (maybe?) visit Mom and Tom on Sunday.

6/24 Monday 10:46am

I may barely make it into the office for an 11am meeting. This isn’t going to be a good week.

7/3 Tuesday 6:11pm

I missed my medicine twice in the last week (I think? Or only once). But just don’t care to take it anymore since I’ve noticed

7/9 Monday 12:15am

This isn’t gonna be a good week. I can already tell.

7/22 Sunday 1am

Doing patching. Teammates were being fucking useless, so I got offline and said I was having internet issues. It’s been a fucking hour and they’ve not done shit. The job is still hung exactly where it was when I left off. They’ve not tried to do anything at all. There are two more groups that have to run for Linux, and we’re already 2/3 hours of patching there is from 11-2am. Cancel the ticking job you dipshits. I even sent an email basically telling you to!!! I did all the ducking work for you!!! Instead you just sit there for an hour doing nothing!!! Cancel the fucking job!! If it gets to 1:30am and still nothing, I’m sending a follow up email and ccing myself. I’m not even suppose to be in charge here!! They are!!! At least Brandon should be. Daniel is ridiculously new, but clearly knows more, so make the ticking call too, for fuck sake.

- they finally did when I was typing this all out. And of course it was the new kid, not the guy who is a full time employee who should be making the call. Then again, I’m a waste of space too. Just got fed up with them and quit with a bullshit excuse. I’m trash. Now that I’ve calmed down, I hate myself again.

Thursday 7/26 2:54pm

First time I’ve been in the office I think nearing 3 weeks? I’ve not been taking my antidepressants as consistently. So tired all the time. Hardly get out of bed. Didn’t go to therapy last week. I need to call tomorrow to cancel next weeks too unless it’s early in the morning. And also schedule more since I don’t have any after that. And also reschedule one on a different day for my medicine.

Just got off my 3pm call. PO wasn’t there, so I basically lead. Talked for like 5 fucking minutes before my team lead said they’ve been doing it manually the last 4 days. So basically I’m a fucking idiot and out of the loop. I’m definitely not Sr IT analyst ready. I’m just gonna leave work. I hate myself. Put myself on do not disturb and closed my laptop. Ran and caught the train. I’m so ducking fat and out of shape. I should just go skydiving by myself and not pull the parachute. Quick and easy. Could I do it in a body bag so it’s less of a mess for the people who have to clean it up? Sky dive, pull the bag out midair. Put it on and zip it up. Splat. Done. Kaput. 😊

How many weeks vacation do I have? Just use it all at once and disappear. Then when it’s up I just never come back. I wanna jump in front of a car or train, but not okay with the impact it’d have on the person driving. If I jump off mountain, the only person it might hurt is the people who found me? Plus annoy the people who have to clean me up.

Could have a suicide note and send it in so the police can find me easily? Idk. Can’t do anything till my cats are okay.

8/14/18 Tuesday 10:19am

On the train to work. Only going in to have an in person meeting. Didn’t wake up till 9:20 and only jumped up because of the daily Standup call at 9:30. Have patching this week and next. Alex is out the rest of the week, so I’m in charge of Windows....never done it by myself, yet alone enough with someone else to be confident. Need to send out the email as soon as we get Tom’s email tomorrow. Get the jobs running and finish documentation. I think Wednesday only has noreboot servers and is a small window? Hopefully okay.

I’ve not been taking my medication. Haven’t been to the doctors in really long (therapy/antidepressant doctor). I have roughly 35 days to get in better shape/health/mental state before going to Samantha’s to see Welcome to Nightvale. Will it happen? No idea.

Still on the train. 10:27. I feel so num. no emotion at all.

5:49pm - on the train home from work. Got a lot done today, so feel somewhat decent. If I can bury my head in work and actually get stuff done, I won’t notice my depression sometimes.

9/5 Wednesday 10:51 am

Have a big kickoff meeting I’m leading. Has a shit ton of people in it. Don’t feel confident. Stomach is nauseated. Want to hurt myself too. Get it over with. Cut my throat. Let me die. Die die die die.

9/20 Thursday 11:05am

Have barely worked the last week since the hurricane hit and we’re in storm mode. Had my first “shift” start at 6 this morning, and I was the only one in the room. Was a good thing I came in to the office. Actually got some stuff done. Just really tired since I couldn’t get to sleep till 2:30 or 3, and got up at 4:22. Going home right at 2. Today hasn’t been bad, but I’m exhausted and sad at myself for being so fat and out of shape.

Animal crossing

Love Nicky

Clash royal

Good fantasy

9/26 11:53am

On train into work. Have two in-person meetings this afternoon. I regret volunteering to do the ITA stuff. Just added stress with no good outcome. My stomach hurts too. Don’t know if something actually wrong, or just anxiety of everything with work, deciding to go to the BigFix event tomorrow during work hours, and text Samantha lying I can’t come to the show. Too many lies happening at once due to my anxiety. I guess I do have anxiety. My depression making my life difficult makes me have anxiety. God my stomach hurts. Kill me kill me I want to die. Slit my throat just want to die. Just disappear I just want to disappear. First steps I need to take today to help fix my anxiety

1. Call and reschedule therapy as soon as I get off train DONE

2. Talk to Cathy and then John about change freeze issue with Websphere maintenance. Then get communications out. SENT AN EMAIL

3. Prep documentation for ITA meeting at 3. WORKING ON

4. Plan what time to leave tomorrow

5. Text Samantha for details (address, what time I should get there, etc)

6. Plan to drive home after show

Die die die die die die di die die die die die kill me

10/3 Wednesday 2:51pm

I’ve not been into work since last Wednesday, and hardly online all this week. Finally got a text from manager this morning asking what’s up. Ready to kill my self.

10/4 Thursday 1:24pm

On the train into work for a 2pm meeting I’m hosting. I may barely make it in. Barely. Or I’ll be late. Shocker. I’m useless. I look and feel disgusting. Literally just need to know if Cathy will fight if we have to push the qa and prod environment during a change freeze. If not, what will happen if we have pushed test and dev, but can’t push prod/qa for months?? I highly doubt that’s okay.

11/1/2018 Thursday 1:12pm

Waiting for the train. Overslept for therapy and then an important meeting I said I’d be late for, but not miss the entire fucking thing. I’ve pretty much given up on therapy for now. Doesn’t make a difference, and won’t get another appointment for 2-3 months, if they’d even give me one with how many no-shows I’ve done. My stomach acid is killing me.

Have meeting. Schedule jobs for 5. Go eat hibachi. Take train home. Meeting is at 2. Doubt chuck will be there. Cathy may call in or not. Literally just depends if John/srini at there. If not, will be over in 10 minutes. If they are, just keep chugging along with Websphere (need to plan how to do QA and PROD along side OS patching.

Wednesday - do it right after patching for Linux/aix. Try and include windows in the patching, or same scenario.

Do we think it’s worth doing adc/cdc groups still? Or just all at once?

Thursday - Linux/aix I do manually (hit B & C right at 5, and then A when it finishes)

11/29 Thursday 9:25am

Going into the office. I’m just really sad. I’m up to 283lbs without any clothes on. I’m working nights now with patching at work. I’m rude to the point that I don’t even move my bag on the train. It’s just all really sad. It’s not bad enough I’m hurting myself or suicidal thoughts, but I’ve just been emotionally numb. I quit taking my medicine for about a week or two, but then noticed an increase in anger, so started taking them again.

12/18 Tuesday 3:39pm

Sitting at a jimmy johns nears my apartment eating. On vacation from work, and watching Lily till Thursday, but I’ve had to be online some because patching still isn’t being covered by the EDC, even though Matt apparently was handling it but clearly didn’t? I’ll be up anyways, so I’m not mad mad, but more just annoyed, because I’m not doing this come January. Pretty depressed though. Sleeping all the time. I weigh over 285lbs now. Maybe I’ll die from a heart attack in 2019? I’ve not been taking my medicine lately, but I’ll run out soon anyways unless I schedule an appointment with my doctor. Definitely see my anger spiking some when I’m not on it while driving or the sorts. Last Friday I went into work and ran into my manager(s) which was good. Talked some, and mentioned about the possibility of moving to Durham. Would be okay, but did mention Charlotte is better career wise, which is true (but I’m okay with that?). I’m just sad all the time still. Apartment is a mess almost always, which isn’t good for the cats. I hardly ever clean their litter boxes, and it’s disgusting for them. Which reminds me I have to take them to the vet. I should call when I get back to schedule something and also clean their litter boxes before anything else.

2/18 10:02am

On my way into work to train one guy on patching, even though I’ll probably be the one having to do it the rest of the week. Was in an accident yesterday. Car hit me from behind. Surprisingly still shaken from it. I’m pathetic. Have to call insurance today since they said they were closed yesterday. Hopefully it’s just visual damage. The bumper popped off a bit, but I don’t know if it can just be popped back into place. I know nothing about cars. Other persons was much worse, but no one was hurt at least. I wish I was hurt. Just kill me. Be done with it all.

Work is never ending stress, this fucking house is too. AND I JUST REMEMBERED IM ON-CALL ALL THIS WEEK FFS. Please let it be quiet. I’m begging you. With all the SDE’s and ongoing stuff, don’t let there be anything for me. Slit my throat.

2/20 Wednesday 2:04pm

Sitting at a car body repair shop getting an estimate by Statefarm. Hopefully should be fine. Work is stressing me out. House is too. I’m responsible for getting the WebLogic patching done, but it’s all up to Srini looking at the problem servers. It’s not fair to him as I’m sure he’s swamped, but he’s the only one who can fix it. Also that one guy who sent that needs to go fuck himself. Passive aggressive fuck. Then with the house. They finally responded saying they want their roofer to take a look, which is fine. Just don’t come back and argue you’re not doing anything. I’m so done with that shit. Just offer to pay half and be done with it. Then my mental health is just terrible. Want to hurt myself. When I get home may take a butter knife or something and hurt myself. Cut my throat. Not even going into the office tomorrow even though I said I would. Fuck Friday. Please be a quiet oncall week. I’m beginning you, just like I do ever time I’m oncall. It’s pathetic. Wish I had cancer instead of Tom. Let me die instead of him. Mom needs him. Just let me die.

It’s Wednesday. Need to make it through the weekend. “Work day” just tomorrow. Have other work to do, but I’m not as worried about the after hour work for IE9 IE11 and office 2010 SP2. Slit my throat slit my throat

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pamphletstoinspire · 7 years ago

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Book Of Genesis - From The Latin Vulgate - Chapter 4

INTRODUCTION.

The Hebrews now entitle all the Five Books of Moses, from the initial words, which originally were written like one continued word or verse; but the Sept. have preferred to give the titles the most memorable occurrences of each work. On this occasion, the Creation of all things out of nothing, strikes us with peculiar force. We find a refutation of all the heathenish mythology, and of the world's eternity, which Aristotle endeavoured to establish. We behold the short reign of innocence, and the origin of sin and misery, the dispersion of nations, and the providence of God watching over his chosen people, till the death of Joseph, about the year 2369 (Usher) 2399 (Sal. and Tirin) B.C. 1631. We shall witness the same care in the other Books of Scripture, and adore his wisdom and goodness in preserving to himself faithful witnesses, and a true Holy Catholic Church, in all ages, even when the greatest corruption seemed to overspread the land. H.

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This Book is so called from its treating of the Generation, that is, of the Creation and the beginning of the world. The Hebrews call it Bereshith, from the word with which it begins. It contains not only the History of the Creation of the World, but also an account of its progress during the space of 2369 years, that is, until the death of Joseph.

The additional Notes in this Edition of the New Testament will be marked with the letter A. Such as are taken from various Interpreters and Commentators, will be marked as in the Old Testament. B. Bristow, C. Calmet, Ch. Challoner, D. Du Hamel, E. Estius, J. Jansenius, M. Menochius, Po. Polus, P. Pastorini, T. Tirinus, V. Bible de Vence, W. Worthington, Wi. Witham. — The names of other authors, who may be occasionally consulted, will be given at full length.

Verses are in English and Latin. HAYDOCK CATHOLIC BIBLE COMMENTARY

This Catholic commentary on the Old Testament, following the Douay-Rheims Bible text, was originally compiled by Catholic priest and biblical scholar Rev. George Leo Haydock (1774-1849). This transcription is based on Haydock's notes as they appear in the 1859 edition of Haydock's Catholic Family Bible and Commentary printed by Edward Dunigan and Brother, New York, New York.

TRANSCRIBER'S NOTES

Changes made to the original text for this transcription include the following:

Greek letters. The original text sometimes includes Greek expressions spelled out in Greek letters. In this transcription, those expressions have been transliterated from Greek letters to English letters, put in italics, and underlined. The following substitution scheme has been used: A for Alpha; B for Beta; G for Gamma; D for Delta; E for Epsilon; Z for Zeta; E for Eta; Th for Theta; I for Iota; K for Kappa; L for Lamda; M for Mu; N for Nu; X for Xi; O for Omicron; P for Pi; R for Rho; S for Sigma; T for Tau; U for Upsilon; Ph for Phi; Ch for Chi; Ps for Psi; O for Omega. For example, where the name, Jesus, is spelled out in the original text in Greek letters, Iota-eta-sigma-omicron-upsilon-sigma, it is transliterated in this transcription as, Iesous. Greek diacritical marks have not been represented in this transcription.

Footnotes. The original text indicates footnotes with special characters, including the astrisk (*) and printers' marks, such as the dagger mark, the double dagger mark, the section mark, the parallels mark, and the paragraph mark. In this transcription all these special characters have been replaced by numbers in square brackets, such as [1], [2], [3], etc.

Accent marks. The original text contains some English letters represented with accent marks. In this transcription, those letters have been rendered in this transcription without their accent marks.

Other special characters.

Solid horizontal lines of various lengths that appear in the original text have been represented as a series of consecutive hyphens of approximately the same length, such as ---.

Ligatures, single characters containing two letters united, in the original text in some Latin expressions have been represented in this transcription as separate letters. The ligature formed by uniting A and E is represented as Ae, that of a and e as ae, that of O and E as Oe, and that of o and e as oe.

Monetary sums in the original text represented with a preceding British pound sterling symbol (a stylized L, transected by a short horizontal line) are represented in this transcription with a following pound symbol, l.

The half symbol (1/2) and three-quarters symbol (3/4) in the original text have been represented in this transcription with their decimal equivalent, (.5) and (.75) respectively.

Unreadable text. Places where the transcriber's copy of the original text is unreadable have been indicated in this transcription by an empty set of square brackets, [].

Chapter 4

The history of Cain and Abel.

[1] And Adam knew Eve his wife: who conceived and brought forth Cain, saying: I have gotten a man through God. Adam vero cognovit uxorem suam Hevam, quae concepit et peperit Cain, dicens : Possedi hominem per Deum.

[2] And again she brought forth his brother Abel. And Abel was a shepherd, and Cain a husbandman. Rursumque peperit fratrem ejus Abel. Fuit autem Abel pastor ovium, et Cain agricola.

[3] And it came to pass after many days, that Cain offered, of the fruits of the earth, gifts to the Lord. Factum est autem post multos dies ut offerret Cain de fructibus terrae munera Domino.

[4] Abel also offered of the firstlings of his flock, and of their fat: and the Lord had respect to Abel, and to his offerings. Abel quoque obtulit de primogenitis gregis sui, et de adipibus eorum : et respexit Dominus ad Abel, et ad munera ejus.

[5] But to Cain and his offerings he had no respect: and Cain was exceedingly angry, and his countenance fell. Ad Cain vero, et ad munera illius non respexit : iratusque est Cain vehementer, et concidit vultus ejus.

[6] And the Lord said to him: Why art thou angry? and why is thy countenance fallen? Dixitque Dominus ad eum : Quare iratus es? et cur concidit facies tua?

[7] If thou do well, shalt thou not receive? but if ill, shall not sin forthwith be present at the door? but the lust thereof shall be under thee, and thou shalt have dominion over it. nonne si bene egeris, recipies : sin autem male, statim in foribus peccatum aderit? sed sub te erit appetitus ejus, et tu dominaberis illius.

[8] And Cain said to Abel his brother: Let us go forth abroad. And when they were in the field, Cain rose up against his brother Abel, and slew him. Dixitque Cain ad Abel fratrem suum : Egrediamur foras. Cumque essent in agro, consurrexit Cain adversus fratrem suum Abel, et interfecit eum.

[9] And the Lord said to Cain: Where is thy brother Abel? And he answered, I know not: am I my brother's keeper? Et ait Dominus ad Cain : Ubi est Abel frater tuus? Qui respondit : Nescio : num custos fratris mei sum ego?

[10] And he said to him: What hast thou done? the voice of thy brother's blood crieth to me from the earth. Dixitque ad eum : Quid fecisti? vox sanguinis fratris tui clamat ad me de terra.

[11] Now, therefore, cursed shalt thou be upon the earth, which hath opened her mouth and received the blood of thy brother at thy hand. Nunc igitur maledictus eris super terram, quae aperuit os suum, et suscepit sanguinem fratris tui de manu tua.

[12] When thou shalt till it, it shall not yield to thee its fruit: a fugitive and a vagabond shalt thou be upon the earth. Cum operatus fueris eam, non dabit tibi fructus suos : vagus et profugus eris super terram.

[13] And Cain said to the Lord: My iniquity is greater than that I may deserve pardon. Dixitque Cain ad Dominum : Major est iniquitas mea, quam ut veniam merear.

[14] Behold thou dost cast me out this day from the face of the earth, and I shall be hidden from thy face, and I shall be a vagabond and a fugitive on the earth: every one, therefore, that findeth me, shall kill me. Ecce ejicis me hodie a facie terrae, et a facie tua abscondar, et ero vagus et profugus in terra : omnis igitur qui invenerit me, occidet me.

[15] And the Lord said to him: No, it shall not be so: but whosoever shall kill Cain, shall be punished sevenfold. And the Lord set a mark upon Cain, that whosoever found him should not kill him. Dixitque ei Dominus : Nequaquam ita fiet : sed omnis qui occiderit Cain, septuplum punietur. Posuitque Dominus Cain signum, ut non interficeret eum omnis qui invenisset eum.

[16] And Cain went out from the face of the Lord, and dwelt as a fugitive on the earth, at the east side of Eden. Egressusque Cain a facie Domini, habitavit profugus in terra ad orientalem plagam Eden.

[17] And Cain knew his wife, and she conceived, and brought forth Henoch: and he built a city, and called the name thereof by the name of his son Henoch. Cognovit autem Cain uxorem suam, quae concepit, et peperit Henoch : et aedificavit civitatem, vocavitque nomen ejus ex nomine filii sui, Henoch.

[18] And Henoch begot Irad, and Irad begot Maviael, and Maviael begot Mathusael, and Mathusael begot Lamech: Porro Henoch genuit Irad, et Irad genuit Maviael, et Maviael genuit Mathusael, et Mathusael genuit Lamech.

[19] Who took two wives: the name of the one was Ada, and the name of the other Sella. Qui accepit duas uxores, nomen uni Ada, et nomen alteri Sella.

[20] And Ada brought forth Jabel: who was the father of such as dwell in tents, and of herdsmen. Genuitque Ada Jabel, qui fuit pater habitantium in tentoriis, atque pastorum.

[21] And his brother's name was Jubal; he was the father of them that play upon the harp and the organs. Et nomen fratris ejus Jubal : ipse fuit pater canentium cithara et organo.

[22] Sella also brought forth Tubalcain, who was a hammerer and artificer in every work of brass and iron. And the sister of Tubalcain was Noema. Sella quoque genuit Tubalcain, qui fuit malleator et faber in cuncta opera aeris et ferri. Soror vero Tubalcain, Noema.

[23] And Lamech said to his wives Ada and Sella: Hear my voice, ye wives of Lamech, hearken to my speech: for I have slain a man to the wounding of myself, and a stripling to my own bruising. Dixitque Lamech uxoribus suis Adae et Sellae : Audite vocem meam, uxores Lamech; auscultate sermonem meum : quoniam occidi virum in vulnus meum, et adolescentulum in livorem meum.

[24] Sevenfold vengeance shall be taken for Cain: but for Lamech seventy times sevenfold. Septuplum ultio dabitur de Cain : de Lamech vero septuagies septies.

[25] Adam also knew his wife again: and she brought forth a son, and called his name Seth, saying: God hath given me another seed, for Abel whom Cain slew. Cognovit quoque adhuc Adam uxorem suam : et peperit filium, vocavitque nomen ejus Seth, dicens : Posuit mihi Deus semen aliud pro Abel, quem occidit Cain.

[26] But to Seth also was born a son, whom he called Enos; this man began to call upon the name of the Lord. Sed et Seth natus est filius, quem vocavit Enos : iste coepit invocare nomen Domini.

Commentary:

Ver. 1. Through God. Heb. may signify also: "even God," as if she thought this was the promised seed, who, as Onkelos paraphrases it, would serve the Lord. C. --- So little could she foresee the future conduct of Cain, whose name may be derived either from kone, possession and acquisition, or from kun, lamentation. The latter interpretation would have been better verified by the event, and the name of Abel, vanity, or sorrow, for which his parents allege no reason, might also have been reversed, on account of his justice, for which he is canonized by Christ himself, and declared the Just. Pious and significant names were imposed by either parent. Cain was the second man. He was not conceived till after the fall, and was therefore the first born in original sin. H.

Ver. 4. Had respect. That is, shewed his acceptance of his sacrifice (as coming from a heart full of devotion): and that we may suppose, by some visible token, such as sending fire from heaven upon his offerings. Ch. --- The offerings of Cain are mentioned without any approbation: those of Abel are the firstlings and fat, or the very best; by which he testified, that he acknowledged God for his first beginning. Sacrifice is due to God alone, and to Him it has always been offered in the Church. We have the happiness to offer that truly eucharistic sacrifice to God, of which those of ancient times were only figures. What sacrifice can our erring brethren shew? W. C.

Ver. 7. Over it. This is a clear proof of free-will. To destroy its force, Protestants translate over him, as if Cain should still retain his privilege of the first-born, notwithstanding all his wickedness, and should rule over Abel, who would willingly submit, "unto thee his desire," &c. But God had made no mention of Abel. The whole discourse is about doing well or ill; and Cain is encouraged to avoid the stings of conscience, by altering his conduct, as it was in his power, how strongly soever his passions might solicit him to evil. H. --- The Hebrew is understood by Onkelos, and the Targum of Jerusalem, in the sense of the Vulgate. The latter reads, "If thou correct thy proceedings in this life, thou wilt receive pardon in the next world. But if thou do not penance for thy sin, it shall remain till the day of the great judgment, and it shall stay, lying at the door of thy heart. But I have given thee power to govern thy concupiscence: thou shalt sway it, either to embrace good or evil." Calmet shews that the Hebrew perfectly admits of this sense. S. Augustine will not allow of the turn which the Manichees gave it. "Thou shalt have dominion over (illius.) What? thy brother! (absit) by no means: over what then, but sin? De C. xv. 7. Protestants formerly abandoned the translation of 1579, (which they have again resumed) and translated better, "unto thee shall be the desire thereof, and thou shalt rule over it," which R. Abenezra explains also of sin. To which of these editions, all given by royal authority, will Protestants adhere? Luther wrote a book against free-will, and Calvin would not admit the very name. But we, with all antiquity, must cry out with S. Jerom, c. Jov. 2: "God made us with free-will, neither are we drawn by necessity to virtue or vice; else where there is necessity, there is neither damnation nor reward." W. H.

Ver. 8. Let us go forth abroad. These words are now wanting in the Hebrew; being omitted, according to Kennicott, since the days of Aquila 130; they are found in the Samaritan copy and version, in the Sept. &c. H. --- The Masorets place a mark, as if something were defective here, and in 27 other verses, or in 25 at least. H. --- Abel's violent death was a figure of that of Jesus Christ, inflicted for the like cause. See Heb. xii. 2. C. --- In consequence of these crimes, Cain separated from the Church, and the Jews became no longer God's people: both Cain and the Jews became vagabonds. H. --- The Targum of Jerusalem observes, that Cain talked against God's providence and the future world, which Abel hearing with marked indignation, Cain took occasion to kill him. W.

Ver. 13. My iniquity, &c. Like Judas, Cain despairs. The Rabbins make him complain of the rigour of God's judgment, "My sin (or punishment) is too great to be borne." I must then be driven from the land of my nativity, from the society of my brethren and parents, from thy presence, for ever. Why do I then live? Let the first man I meet, kill me. Liran.

Ver. 14. Every one that findeth me, shall kill me. His guilty conscience made him fear his own brothers, and nephews; of whom, by this time, there might be a good number upon the earth: which had now endured near 130 years; as may be gathered from Gen. v. 3, compared with Chap. iv. 25, though in the compendious account given in the Scripture, only Cain and Abel are mentioned. Ch. --- Cain is little concerned about any thing but the loss of life. M.

Ver. 15. Set a mark, &c. The more common opinion of the interpreters of holy writ, supposes this mark to have been a trembling of the body; or a horror and consternation in his countenance. Ch. --- God gave this first murderer a reprieve, allowing him time for repentance; but he neglected it, and died a reprobate; having been, during life, the head of an apostate church, and of the city of the devil, which has ever since opposed the city of God, and the society of the faithful. Though all his posterity were drowned in the deluge, some were soon found, even in the family of Noe, who stood up for the wretched pre-eminence in wickedness and rebellion, against the truth. See S. Aug. W. &c. H.

Ver. 16. A fugitive, according to his sentence. Heb. nod, which the Sept. have taken for a proper name. "In the land of Naid, over against Eden," (H.) or in the fields of Nyse, in Hyrcania, to the east of Eden and Armenia. C.

Ver. 17. His wife. She was a daughter of Adam, and Cain's own sister; God dispensing with such marriages in the beginning of the world, as mankind could not otherwise be propagated. --- He built a city, viz. In process of time, when his race was multiplied, so as to be numerous enough to people it. For in the many hundred years he lived, his race might be multiplied even to millions. Ch. --- The Hanuchta, which Ptolemy places in Susiana, (C.) may perhaps have been built after the flood, in the same place. Josephus says, Cain was the first who fortified a city; designing it for a retreat, where he might keep the fruits of his robberies. Ant. 1. 3. Peirere founds his ill-concerted system of Preadamites, or of men existing before Adam, on the history of Cain exercising husbandry, building a city, &c.; as if there were any difficulty in supposing, that the arts would have made some progress in the lapse of above a century. H.

Ver. 19. Two wives. Lamech first transgressed the law of having only one wife at a time. C. 11. 24. None before the deluge is mentioned as having followed his example, even among the abandoned sons of men. Abraham, the father of the faithful, and some others, after that event, when the age of man was shortened, and the number of the true servants of God very small, were dispensed with by God, who tolerated the custom of having many wives at the same time among the Jews, till our Saviour brought things back to the ancient standard. Mat. xix. 4. And why do we excuse the patriarchs, while we condemn Lamech? Because the one being associated with the wicked, gives us reason to judge unfavourably of him, while Abraham is constantly mentioned in Scripture with terms of approbation and praise, and therefore we have no right to pass sentence of condemnation upon him, as some Protestants have done, after the Manichees. Hence the fathers defend the one, and reject the other with abhorrence. H. --- Tert. (Monog. c. 5.) and S. Jerom, c. Jovin. 1. says, "Lamech, first of all, a bloody murderer, divided one flesh between two wives." It was never lawful, says P. Innocent III. c. Gaudemus, for any one to have many wives at once, unless leave was given by divine revelation;" and S. Aug. joins with him in defending the patriarchs, by this reason, "When it was the custom, it was not a sin."

Ver. 22. Noema, who is supposed to have invented the art of spinning. C. --- All these worthy people were distinguished for their proficiency in the arts, while they neglected the study of religion and virtue. H. --- The inventors of arts among the Greeks lived mostly after the siege of Troy. C.

Ver. 23. Said. This is the most ancient piece of poetry with which we are acquainted. Fleury. --- Lamech may be considered as the father of poets. H. --- I have slain a man, &c. It is the tradition of the Hebrews, that Lamech in hunting slew Cain, mistaking him for a wild beast: and that having discovered what he had done, he beat so unmercifully the youth, by whom he was led into that mistake, that he died of the blows. Ch. --- S. Jerom, 9. 1. ad Dam. acknowledges the difficulty of this passage, on which Origen wrote two whole books. W.

Ver. 24. Seventy times. A similar expression occurs, Mat. xviii. 22. to denote a great but indefinite number. God had promised to revenge the murder of Cain seven fold, though he had sinned voluntarily; so Lamech hopes that, as he had acted by mistake, and blinded by passion, in striking the stripling, the son of Tubalcain, he would deserve to be protected still more from falling a prey to the fury of any other. But many reject this tradition as fabulous, unknown to Philo, Josephus, &c. Moses no where mentions the death of Cain. Some, therefore, understand this passage with an interrogation; as if, to convince his wives that his sin was not so enormous as was supposed, he should say, Do not think of leaving me. What! have I killed a young man, as Cain did Abel, and still he is suffered to live unmolested; or have I beaten any one so that I should be punished? Onkelos, in effect, puts a negation to the same purport, "I have not killed, &c.:" (C.) others understand this passage, as if Lamech considered his crimes as much more grievous than even those of Cain. T.

Ver. 26. Began to call upon, &c. Not that Adam and Seth had not called upon God before the birth of Enos, but that Enos used more solemnity in the worship and invocation of God. Ch. --- He directed all his thoughts towards heaven, being reminded by his own name, which signifies one afflicted, that he could look for no solid happiness on earth. Seth had brought him up, from his infancy, in these pious sentiments, and his children were so docile to his instructions, that they began to be known in the world for their extraordinary piety, and were even styled the Sons of God. C. vi. 2. H. --- Religion was not a human invention, but many ceremonies have been adopted, at different times, to make an impression on the minds of the people. Before Enos, the heads of families had officiated in their own houses; now, perhaps, they met together in places consecrated to the divine service, and sounded forth the praises of the Most High. Enos was probably most conspicuous for his zeal on these occasions: at least, a new degree of fervour manifested itself in his days. On the other hand, "the name of the Lord began to be profaned" about this time, as the Rabbin understand this passage, by the introduction of idolatry; which is a common effect of a dissolute life, which many began now to lead. Wis. xiv. 12. C. --- The beginning of fornication is the devising of idols. We have, nevertheless, no certain proof of idols being introduced till many years after the deluge. H.

#book of genesis

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nirbabani · 5 years ago

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Nir Babani – Top 8 Misconceptions about the Federal Express Entry Program

The Federal Express Entry Program is very popular, however, there are a lot of misconceptions and myths regarding it. We took the time to create a list of myths to give a better idea for prospective applicants of what the program is about.

Myth 1. Anyone can enter the Federal Express Entry Program

Fact: You can enter the Express Entry only if you are eligible for immigrating to Canada via the Federal Economic Immigration Program.

This simply isn’t true. You will be admitted to join the pool only if you are eligible for immigrating to Canada via their Federal Economic Immigration Program. You do need to be eligible for a Federal Skilled Trades Program. That means you need a score of over 67 points from 100 points Factors that are being assessed are: Education, Age, Work Experience, Language proficiency, etc.

Myth 2. You can see your ranking and points on the Comprehensive Ranking System (CRS)

Fact: Although candidates will be able to see their CRS Score, they will not be able to see their specific ranking.

The Comprehensive Ranking system is predominantly for CIC’s benefit, as an accurate method of ranking the most eligible candidates. CIC does not release information such as how many points will be required for upcoming draws, although eligible candidates can see the points required for draws that have already taken place.

Being able to see this information may help you work out a number of points you should aim for, although surpassing this will not provide you with any guarantees that you will be issued an invitation to apply for permanent residence via Express Entry.

The Canadian immigration system is very dynamic, one of the best remedies for the uncertainty this process involves is to secure a job offer from a Canadian employer. It will allow the applicant to scientifically increase chances to be invited by the Federal or Provincial Governments, or by starting the journey in Canada on a temporary permit, and eventually be issued with permanent residency status after some Canadian work Experience acquired. You can consult with Nir Babani, the members of the Immigration Consultants of Canada Regulatory Council (ICCRC).

Myth 3. You need a job offer in order to be qualified.

Fact: A job offer is not absolutely necessary, but it will most definitely help to improve your chances to be selected

It’s true that Canadian employers have a significant impact on the Express Entry stream that said, having secured a job offer is not compulsory in order to immigrate to Canada under the Federal Express Entry Stream.

If you’re a candidate in the Express Entry pool, you’ll be awarded points and ranked using the Comprehensive Ranking System (CRS) based on your Education, Work Experience, Language Proficiency, Age, etc. Under this system, you could score a maximum of 1,200 points. Up to 600 points are allocated towards your professional profile, and additional 600 points may be awarded when the applicant receives a nomination by Canada’s 10 provinces, or if the applicant is able to secure a qualified job offer from a private-sector employer, which awards the application anywhere from 50 points to 200 points.

At any event, being able to secure a job offer can be a game-changer in your immigration journey.

Myth 4. You should submit your profile to the pool of candidates only if your CRS score is very close to the last published draw.

Fact: Some provinces draw candidates who scored 300-350 points.

It’s true that candidates who score anywhere from 460 points to 480 points are likely to receive an invitation to apply by the Federal Government, known as ITA, almost on spot. However, as much as you are talented, you’re most likely won’t score that high based on your professional profile. You are welcome to calculate your score using this link: https://www.cic.gc.ca/english/immigrate/skilled/crs-tool.asp

The vast majority of the applicants score anywhere from 300 points to 455 points. These applicants are very much welcome to join the pool as the criteria, set forth by the Canadian immigration system, is of the opinion that each one of these candidates has a very good professional profile. The system allows these applicants to join the pool so that they will be able to expose themselves to as many provinces or private sector employers who may extend to them a job offer, through a governmental job board, known as a job bank.

Eventually, the whole purpose of the pool is to expose international talents, who are good enough to join the pool, to Canadian employers and provinces. Proactive applicants are likely to secure a job offer, and by that to establish that their skills, talent and work experience are recognized by Canadian employers.

As a matter of fact, many candidates, currently over 50,000 profiles who scored 300 to 455 points already submitted their profiles to the Federal Pool of skilled workers, as they understand it may open for them lots of employment opportunities. Furthermore, Canadian employers, from the private sector, are much more receptive to hire a foreign national, who is applying for a vacant position, when they know he has already started an immigration process. It’s a clear sign the applicant is committed to this immigration project and getting ready properly for it. Canadian employers are attracted to candidates who are proactive as it builds trust and justifies, for many of them, the wait time involved in hiring foreign nationals.

Last but not least, the Canadian system is very dynamic; the draw score is subject to governmental decisions related to the current requirements of the Canadian economy and society. Having a high score today does not mean you will be selected in the next draw.

Canada Immigration requires a marathon approach to the whole process, most Candidates take it one step at a time and start by submitting their profiles to the pool of candidates knowing it’s an important step towards realizing their immigration project.

Myth 5. Express Entry is the only method you can use to immigrate to Canada

Fact: Some provinces will select immigrants outside the Federal Express Entry pool

While the Federal Express Entry Program is very popular, in some cases provinces will end up selecting immigrants that are not a part of this system. Every province has a Provincial Nominee Program they use to select immigrants.

So, even if the Federal Express Entry Program is the most common system, applicants can always apply directly through the Provincial streams given. They already secured a job offer from a Canadian Employer in this particular province. British Columbia, for example, has the Skilled Worker internal stream and the Federal Express Entry system as well, and they both work very well.

It differs based on the province, but it’s certainly possible to not be a part of the Federal Express Entry Program and still to secure a job offer. Most immigrants have been using the Federal Express Entry program since 2015 and onward. That being said, you can still go with the provincial programs as they can be a very good alternative.

Myth 5. If you are invited to apply for permanent residence, you have plenty of time to collect all documents.

Fact: You need to prepare your documents before the 60-day deadline, this way you can have everything ready when you get the invitation to apply.

You shouldn’t wait until you receive an invitation to apply until you gather your documents. The truth is that acquiring all the documents and making sure that they are up to the CIC standard is not easy. That means you have to collect essential information about your professional profile as well as supporting documents such as identity documents, employer reference letters, education credentials, Language proficiency assessments, etc. So you shouldn’t leave this towards the end.

Instead, you want to make sure that everything is managed accordingly and in a very professional manner. The submission deadline is up to 60 days, but you need to avoid preparing last-minute. Proper preparation can help make quite a difference. Mr. Nir Babani, the founder of TFG Canada Immigration Firm, can guide you for permanent residence in Canada.

Myth 6. You don’t need to pass any language tests in order to enter the Express Entry pool

Fact: Candidates are required to pass a French or English language test before entering the pool.

All candidates must demonstrate their language proficiency in either English or French in order to be included in the Express Entry pool. Official tests are IELTS or TEF. Bear in mind that test results must meet the eligibility requirements set by the Government; you must score at least 7 all four abilities, Writing, Speaking, Reading, and listening.

We recommend you take a language test as soon as possible as without it you won’t be able to enter the Express Entry pool.

Myth 7. After you create the Express Entry profile, you can’t update it

Fact: Any candidate is able to update their profile whenever they see fit.

After the Federal Express Entry profile is submitted, you can update it at any given time. So not only are you allowed to make changes at any given time, you are encouraged to do that. Showcasing new skills, qualifications, work experiences, and so on can make a huge difference, and that’s exactly what you need to go for as part of constant effort to increase your CRS score.

You may also receive a provincial nomination or job offer from a Canadian employer, which would give you a significant point boost. While your profile remains in the pool, it will not be ‘locked’ at any time

Myth 8. Express Entry is making the immigration process very easy

Fact: Despite the fact that this process might seem apparently quite easy, the Government is studying every profile closely, failure to comply with the program’s criteria may result in refusal of the application.

The Canadian government has been designed to address the country’s labor market shortages and fulfill its long-term economic needs. The Government has been working on improving its system; it is now more efficient than ever before. But that doesn’t mean that your application will not undergo the same amount of screening as before, it is absolutely imperative that you meticulously prepare all your supporting documentation and ensure all of your information is accurate.

Do you want to apply for Express Entry?

You will only receive an invitation to apply for a permanent residence if you become part of the Express Entry pool. Our focus is to help you stand out and show that you are the right pick for the Canadian Government or private sector businesses. We will make sure that you highlight your skills and talents you can bring to the table and with our help, the governments and Canadian employers will notice you. This is the best way to maximize your chances to realize your immigration goals.

Resources: http://www.allwritersdestination.com/nir-babani-top-8-misconceptions-about-the-federal-express-entry-program/

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farukhislam · 5 years ago

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Guidance To Australia Permanent Residency

Here Are Some Australia Permanent Residency Processes

· Check qualification - Under Point's lattice, you need to score 65 focuses

· Select a significant surveying body for your abilities. It is the initial step use of Australian procedure

· Apply for a pool framework subsequent to surveying work understanding and training foundation

· In light of the score, you get ITA for the last stage

· Apply for the procedure last stage inside 2 months. Counsel DIBP in the wake of getting ITA greeting

· You will get your visa after you submit medicals

About Australia PR Visa and Exact Processing Time

Compute the specific preparing time for Australia PR visa application. Your application runs into various stages with each stage covering distinctive time. Here are the accompanying stages:

Expertise Assessment - Get your training foundation and work experience surveyed. This is generally finished with the assistance of the assigned group of aptitude evaluation. When you give each report, you can make sure about outcomes quicker. It takes 45-60 days for the handling time.

EOI - Prove your enthusiasm through Skill select. EOI stage chooses your qualification score. You have higher possibilities for ITA (Invitation to Apply) if your scores are higher. The handling time relies upon the person's score.

Visa Application - On getting ITA, you need to present the visa application to DIBP. DIBP is the Department of Immigration and Border Protection. This is commonly completed 2 months post you get ITA. On the off chance that your wards go along with you, you should include their subtleties.

Check and Medicals - After getting ITA, you ought to apply for confirmation and medicals. It encourages you to present the reports quicker for PR visa gesture.

Endorsing The Visa - After submitting required records, DIBP follows careful research. When it finds the subtleties fulfilling, it will allow you the visa inside 3 to 5 months.

Getting ready For Departure - You have a half year to relocate to the nation. This follows once you get affirmation of visa endorsement.

Qualified Criteria of Australia Permanent Residency Consist Of

Age - Your age ought not surpass 45 years

Capability - If you have a degree authorize universally, it is adequate

English Language - Be capable in English language. Secure 6 band in IELTS

Visa Category - Select the fitting system for various PR visa types. Your expertise select must match the range of abilities rundown of Australia

Work Experience - You ought to have an ideal work understanding. Your occupation ought to be a piece of STSOL, MLTSSL or ROL

Clinical Examination - Show proofs that you are sound wellbeing astute

Point-based Criteria - Score 65 focuses as point-based choice framework

Other PR Requirements

People can apply for Australia PR. Match all necessities by getting 65 focuses in point count framework. Show assets as a feature of evidence to continue you and family. In the event that you need to move to Australia, here are sure prerequisites as follows-

· Language test subtleties

· Training capabilities

· Work experience and endorsements

· Clinical and police check

· Travel reports

· Settlement finances evidence for example financial balances, bonds, money, and so forth.

Devisers Immigration Lawyers can help you in accomplishing your Australian dream and will help you in the whole relocation process from your nation of origin or your nation of home.

Contact Devisers Immigration Advisers to offer wings to your fantasies!!!

#Devisers Immigration #Best Immigration Consultants In Dubai #Devisers Immigration Reviews

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thingstodoinsandiego-blog · 6 years ago

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San Diego's Premiere Team Building Activity Revealed and Reviewed

Our genuine America’s Cup racing yachts provide the perfect venue for group building and/company sailing charters; dividing your staff into groups to race one another. Stars & Stripes USA-11 and IL Moro ITA-sixteen each competed in the America’s Cup venue held here in San Diego in 1992. Your friends will be a part of our crew of 6 on each boat to type a crew to get the utmost performance out of each racing yacht. Beneath the supervision of our crew, your crew members will take the helm, make tactical choices, and grind the winches to trim the sails. We can have a collection of 3 races up and down San Diego Bay to see which group can make the claim of America’s Cup winners. Don't just take our word for it take a look at some of our reviews from past Team Building Sailors and Corporate Events we have had over the past years. An amazing experience! This was a great team building event! The crew was amazing - their sailing skills were incredible and so was their hospitality. As novices, we learned a bit about sailing as well as the historic boat we were on. We partook in the work required to get this boat under sail, getting some first hand experience. The crew took pictures and video of the event and provided it to the participants at no additional cost. It was refreshing to have this offered at the end of an event like this instead of being "nickeled and dimed" for more money after the trip is over. It was fun to share a cold beverage with our "mates" as we came back into port. This was truly a world class experience I can highly recommend. Sailing at its best in San Diego This is definitely your best bet for sailing on the San Diego bay. The crew is top notch, they will instruct you what to do so you get hands on crew work, and you can steer the boat! I would definitely recommend chartering this for team building exercises. Would love to do it again. All I can say is WOW!!!! I planned a trip online for my boss, co-workers and myself (7 of us) using only the website and a few emailed questions back and forth. You can only imagine the stress that the unknown has when planning a type of excursion such as this. All of my concerns were for nothing!!! EVERYONE had a wonderful time and has thanked me continuously since our trip. As a matter of fact, my boss enjoyed it so much that he recommended to our SVP that our company from 5 different markets do this as a team building event next year as part of our DM Conference. The staff is courteous and the tour of San Diego is incredible!! I am looking forward to next year with great anticipation!!! Excellent team-building fun - what a great way to see the bay" My team of operations managers and I signed up for a 4-hour cruise on the Stars and Stripes 11 - sailboat in San Diego. We were all new to the sailboat experience and had an amazing time. The sailboat and crew were incredible! We were offered the opportunity to work with the crew as little or as much as we wanted. Each member of our party was able to steer the sailboat throughout the cruise. We enjoyed a relaxing afternoon sailing out toward the ocean, and then back through the San Diego Bay. Not only did we get to sail past and learn about many of the local attractions, including museums and aircraft carriers, we also had a few dolphin sightings which were exciting for us, since we are from the Midwest. The crew was incredibly friendly and accommodating. We all agreed it was a great adventure and would love to come back again at our conference next year. We would highly reccommend it to anyone. One of the best experiences you will have ever have in your life Whether you are an avid sailor or a novice like myself, the Sail USA-11 team will make this a memorable afternoon and teach you skills you didn't think possible. Marnie and the crew were great; friendly, supportive, encouraging and always respectful. You'll learn team-building skills while helping the crew with the operation of the boat. This is more than just a pleasure sailing experience. It is a real opportunity to bond with your friends, family or new friends you make on board! I would highly recommend this trip for parents and children. You can't buy this kind of quality time together anywhere else. A HUGE thumbs up and thank you to SAIL USA-11. - Stefan Pagacik, Manomet, MA Sailing with the starts... This past weekend I went with a group of friends aboard the USA-11 on the beautiful San Diego Bay. We actually got to do a lot of the sailing and the day was just perfect with a nice breeze and sunshine. It's a great team building activity or just to go out and have a great time with friends and family. We had so much fun!!!!!!! Top Rated Team Building Activity in San Diego, CA from Lynn Hanna on Vimeo. WE LOOK FORWARD TO INTRODUCING YOUR GROUP TO SAN DIEGO'S TOP TEAM BUILDING ACTIVITYMore Team-Building Information Below https://sailusa11.com/team-building-san-diego/ https://sailusa11.com/team-building-new-years-day-race-san-diego-bay-2019/ https://sailusa11.com/team-building-san-diego-must-do/ https://sailusa11.com/san-diego-team-building-events-that-work/ https://sailusa11.com/best-team-building-activity-in-san-diego/ https://sailusa11.com/team-building-activities-in-san-diego/ https://sailusa11.com/sailboat-charters-and-gliding-in-san-diego/ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Team_building https://sailusa11.com/reviews-about-san-diego-sailing-tours/ https://sailusa11.com/sail-san-diego-reviews/ https://www.workamajig.com/blog/team-building-guide Out Team-Building Reviews https://sailusa11.com/faq/ Read the full article

#team-building #sailing #groups

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chanoyu-to-wa · 5 years ago

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Nampō Roku, Book 5 (15): the Display of Three Utensils on the Nagabon -- the Difference Between Serving Tea to a Noble Guest in Another Place, Compared with Doing So in One’s Own House.

15) Nagabon mitsu-kazari, waga-ya to ta-ke to no chigai nari [長盆三ツ飾、我家ト他家トノ違也]¹.

[The writing reads: (between the ten-ita and ji-ita) shita jo-jō (下如常)².]

The kaki-ire [書入]³:

〇 With respect to the things one has been asked to do [when serving tea to] a nobleman⁴, if this [involves] the arrangement of the tray, it would be best for one to do things as is shown [in the sketch] -- as a gesture of respect⁵.

When one goes to some other place [to serve tea], it is [occasionally] the case where the guest will request [the visiting host] to attend to the arrangement [of the objects on the daisu]⁶. [In this case,] from the way [you] usually [do things] in your own home, the entire line [of objects] should be moved upward into the higher seat⁷.

_________________________

¹Nagabon mitsu-kazari, waga-ya to ta-ke to no chigai nari [長盆三ツ飾、我家ト他家トノ違也].

This is essentially the same nagabon mitsu-kazari that was examined in the previous post*, though here the initial orientation of the nagabon on the daisu is modified to reflect the difference between what is done when serving tea to an important guest in one’s own home, and when doing so elsewhere†.

Some of the details that are mentioned in the kaki-ire (such as making every effort to conform to the requests made by the nobleman) were of extreme importance during the Edo period, and it is possible that this arrangement was added to the collection (by agents of the Tokugawa bakufu)‡ early in the seventeenth century.

As Shibayama Fugen (quoting from Book Six) reminds us that “in our own home, we should put [our] ordinary utensils on the migi-za [右座], so that they overlap their kane by two-thirds; but when serving tea in other places using utensils that belong to other people, or with the utensils that will be used to serve a nobleman, everything should be moved toward the left seat, where they overlap their kane by two-thirds**.” __________ *In the sketch in the Enkaku-ji manuscript, the chaire has been changed from a large katatsuki to a large taikai. As a result, the chaire is shown overlapping its kane on the left, rather than on the right as in the previous post.

†While the title of this entry expressly states “in that [person’s] house,” it also encompasses serving tea to a nobleman anywhere else -- such as in a temple.

‡As has been mentioned before, on several occasions, the entries that appear to have been added seem to feature titles that are written as complete sentences -- that is, they end with the verb nari [也]. The authentic Jōō material apparently does not.

**Tsune no dōgu oki-kata waga-ya ni te ha migi-za no kata [h]e san-bun-no-ni wo yaru, yo-so ni te ha ta-nin no dōgu mata ha kijin no o-dōgu ha hidari-za no kata [h]e san-bun-no-ni yaru-koto nari [常ノ道具置方我家ニテハ右座ノ方ヘ三分ノ二ヲヤル、他所ニテハ他人ノ道具又ハ貴人ノ御道具ハ左座ノ方ヘ三分ノ二ヤルコトナリ].

Tanaka Senshō also mentions this same passage in his commentary.

It must be remembered that, in the Nampō Roku, “right seat” (migi-za [右座]) refers to the left side of the daisu; and “left seat” (hidari-za [左座]) refers to the right side of the daisu.

²Shita jo-jō [下如常ō].

“Below, the same as always.”

³The complete text of the kaki-ire reads:

Kijin no o-dōgu nado ōse ni yotte, bon-kazari nado to araba, uyamaite kaku no gotoki mo yoshi, yoso [h]e iki-taru ni, kyaku yori kazari-sōroe to shomō no toki mo aru-koto nari, jika no yori hitosuji jōza [h]e kuri-agaru nari.

[貴人ノ御道具ナド仰セニ依テ、盆カサリナトヽアラバ、ウヤマイテ如此モヨシ、他所ヘ行タルニ、客ヨリカサリ候ヘト所望ノ時モアルコト也、自家ノヨリ一筋上座ヘクリ上ル也｡]

The text will be analyzed sentence by sentence below.

⁴Kijin no o-dōgu nado ōse ni yotte [貴人ノ御道具ナド仰セニ依テ].

O-dōgu nado [お道具など]: o-dōgu [お道具] means the utensils; nado [など] means and so forth, and the rest.

This seems to include both the utensils, and the appropriate method of arranging and using them.

Ōse ni yotte [仰せに依って]: ōse (usually as ōseraru [仰せらる] or ōserareru [仰せられる]) means to say (with reference to something said by a nobleman). It, therefore, has the nuance of a polite command. In other words, the nobleman has asked the person who will be serving him tea to use certain utensils, or arrange (or handle) them in a certain manner. It would be best, therefore, for the host to accede to his request, and conduct everything accordingly.

⁵Bon-kazari nado to araba, uyamaite kaku no gotoki mo yoshi [盆カサリナトヽアラバ、ウヤマイテ如此モヨシ].

“If there is the display of a tray, and things of that sort, it would be best [if this is done] as shown, as a gesture of respect.”

Bon-kazari [盆飾り] can refer to the way that the tray is displayed, as well as to the way that the utensils are arranged on the tray.

Uyamau [敬う] means (to have) deep respect for (someone). Uyamaite [敬いて] would suggest the demonstration of this feeling.

⁶Yo-so [h]e iki-taru ni, kyaku yori kazari-sōroe to shomō no toki mo aru-koto nari [他所ヘ行タルニ、客ヨリカサリ候ヘト所望ノ時モアルコト也].

“Going to another place, there is also the case when the guest asks [the visiting host] to attend to the arrangement [of the utensils].”

Kyaku [客], guest, here refers to the kijin [貴人] (nobleman), to whose house the host has gone in order to serve him tea.

The nobleman wishes to drink tea from his own utensils*, and he asks the visiting host to arrange them as he sees fit. __________ *Contextually speaking, this is not an especially odd request, since the noble classes were often loath to eat or drink from something that might have been used to serve someone whom they consider an underling. This would have been particularly true in a rigidly stratified society such as was present in Japan during the Edo period -- when the hereditary nobles viewed the military class as brutes and usurpers (even when behaving politely to their faces), and the daimyō considered the lower orders (including the lower ranking samurai) barely human.

We must also remember that this person is so important that, if the host wishes to serve him tea, the host has to visit his home in order to do it.

⁷Ji-ka no yori hitosuji jōza [h]e kuri-agaru nari [自家ノヨリ一筋上座ヘクリ上ル也].

Ji-ka [自家] means one's own home.

Hitosuji [一筋] means the (entire) line of utensils -- the utensils are laid out in a horizontal line on the nagabon -- from the dai-temmoku, to the chashaku, to the chaire. The entire line is moved upward (in other words, toward the right*), without any changes to order or spacing. (This is, of course, easily done, since they are all lined up on a tray, so only the tray has to be moved to associate the different objects with the next-higher kane).

Kuri-agaru [繰上がる] means to move up, advance. Since the higher seats are toward the right, the tray is moved to the right, so that the dai-temmoku is associated with the central kane, and the chaire is associated with the second kane on the right. __________ *In the original setting, the katte was located on the host's right, while the guests were seated on his left. Thus, moving things toward the right both made them more inaccessible, and moved them into a cleaner place (since the farther they were from the side of the room where the guests were seated, the less chance there would be of the dust that was raised by the guests' movements, falling on them).

——————————————–———-—————————————————

◎ Analysis of the Arrangement.

This arrangement is essentially the same as the one discussed in installment 14, with the only real difference being that the nagabon has been moved toward the right, so as to associate all of the utensils with the next-higher kane.

As mentioned above, here a large taikai chaire (measuring 3-sun 2-bu in diameter)* has been substituted for the large katatsuki that was shown in the earlier sketch. As a result, the dai-temmoku and chaire are spaced equally†, and in this way are brought into the proper contact with their respective kane. ___________ *This would be the most likely chaire to be owned by a nobleman (who likely was not a chajin), because since the fourteenth century all of the mansions of the nobility would have had at least one o-chanoyu-dana installed (adjacent to the main reception room, if nowhere else), and the large taikai was the usual chaire that was used on the o-chanoyu-dana.

†The space between the left rim and the temmoku-dai, between the temmoku-dai and the chaire, and between the chaire and the right rim, are all equal (approximately 2-sun 5-bu). As a result, the objects can be arranged quite easily visually, and then all the host has to do is correctly orient the tray so that the dai-temmoku overlaps its kane by one-third. This is another good example of how these trays “work.”

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bolbianddolanhouse · 6 years ago

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BNHA self insert AU

Nani the heck is this? Read here!

Chapter 11: Secret Gardens Grow Forbidden Fruits

Its Monday and news of the practice test victory spread around to the few that didn’t tune in. I woke up still not at my best condition, Mimi and Jin were just as bad. I drove us to school but our bodies weren’t letting us walk properly, lucky for us, Diya put us in the school golf cart to take us to class from the parking lot. Since I have to go back and forth campus in my school day, I got a wheelchair to propel myself via Muffin 2.0.

-Homeroom before Weaponry-

“Ok class, we are going over heavy weapons today so fully suit up!” Diya announced as he panned to us “except for our trio here, you three still have to observe so you don’t have excuses when you do get better and have to do it.”

“Yes sir!” we said in unison.

“This sucks ass! I really wanted to get hands on right away with the heavy stuff!” huffed Mimi.

“Me too! Didn’t think I’d be this fucked up after that exam!” groaned Jin as he wobbled to the back of the golf cart.

“I got the most damage, I can’t even feed myself!” I said as I sat in the wheelchair “Last night Glasses had to spoon feed me dinner and carried me around like a fucking child!”

Before Mimi and Jin could say anything, our classmate Yuka spoke up “Are you telling me that boy isn’t your new boyfriend? Girly, a boy wouldn’t just carry you around or feed you because you’re hurt, he’s in love with you!”

“Naw! he’s just being nice!” I retort “He’s been like that since my first day in that class. It’s not love, it’s just kindness!”

“Oh yea? what makes you think its JUST that?” sassed Yuka.

“Well, since living together, he hasn’t made any moves on me that have romantic notions. I gave him the opportunity to kiss me and he got close and backed out. I just think he’s gay or questioning and is confiding in me to keep his secret.” I say as we made our way to the gym.

“Hmmm that does add up, maybe you’re right” Yuka said pondering.

Weapons class was a disaster zone with a lot of injuries and sprained shoulders. The 3 of us were sort glad we didn’t get hands on right away. Class ends a bit early because of the amount of injuries, that gave me time to navigate myself to the hero wing in the wheelchair and Muffin 2.0. I was making my way down and I see some 1-B students walking toward me, I think dang I’m that early!

“Oh hello Palma-san!” said Kendo “how are you?”

“Hi! I’ve seen better days” I said rubbing my knees “I took a serious beating and my knees are giving out but I should be ready to train again later this week.”

“That’s a relief to hear! Oh, have you met my classmate here?” she said motioning to Monoma.

“I saw him at the welcome party but I don’t think I got the pleasure to meet you!”

“Humph! Well if you must know! I am Neito Monoma, we have the same copy quirk.” he said very dramatically.

“Very nice to meet you! Copy you say? how long can you sustain your copies? Can you do doubles? Do you have mastery in any?” I said intrigued by our common factor.

“Um well I sustain them for 5 minutes at a time and I didn’t really think about those other things you said.”

“Oh....then what are you training to be?”

“Well a Hero of course!”

“Doesn’t seem like you are if you don’t have mastery or can double wield.”

“THATS WHAT I’VE BEEN TELLING HIM!” exclaimed Kendo “He thinks he can make it into the A class by just degrading everyone and working out the minimum.”

“No! thats not how it works dude” I said giving Monoma a hard look “I can help train you the way I self-taught myself to hold my copies for hours at a time and how to double wield once I recover. If you really want to make it with the big boys, you gotta put on your big boy pants and make the effort.”

“I wear my pants just fine, agent!” he scoffed “but I accept this training session.”

“Great! I’m so proud of you Neito!” Kendo said excitedly “maybe you’d be able to finally be on par with me!”

“You’re embarrassing me in front of her!” said Monoma blushing at his expose of weakness.

“Cool! I’ll be letting you know when I get back on my feet so we can get started!” I said as I scooted away “Bye bye now!”

“She’s so sweet!” said Kendo turning into their classroom “can’t believe you let your guard down like that around her.”

“Well, she was in a wheelchair! what could she do?!” he said walking to his seat “she’s also easy on the eyes so training with her would be a treat for me.”

*cut to the Hero class, before I arrive*

“I’m a bit worried about Palma-san” said Tokoyami “she was groaning trying to get ready for school and was the last one to leave the dorms.”

“I saw her get loaded on the back of the school golf cart along with her friends this morning” said Todoroki “but maybe she’s being carried here by somebody.”

“Maybe All Might?!” perked up Midoriya.

“NO YOU STUPID DEKU!” Bakugo yelled at Midoriya “she hates All Might, thats the last person she’d want to help her.”

“Maybe I should go and see if she needs assistance” said Iida standing up “she wouldn’t want to miss today’s lesson.”

As he made his way to the door, I arrive and Muffin 2.0 slid the door open.

“Hi everyone! please excuse my robot and wheels, I can’t walk very far without falling but I should be fine by Wednesday.” I said as positive as possible.

“Oh no! that won’t do! Here let me” Iida said picking me up from the wheelchair and walking me to my desk “allow me to write today’s notes so you can rest your hands too.”

“Tenya I’m not a child! I can do this on my own” I said flushed because I don’t like being carried “besides, Muffin 2.0 is programed to take notes for me and other assisted commands.”

Class starts and we go over new laws and how they’re affecting us. Class ended right on time and as I’m waiting for everyone to leave so I can wobble over to my wheelchair, Iida walks up to me.

“Please Ita, let me carry and accompany you.”

“You can accompany me but don’t carry me, I don’t like it.”

“Why not?”

“Because, I feel the breeze on my bottom and I’m pretty sure everyone got a peek at my panties and my big butt.”

Iida blushed hard realizing that I felt uncomfortable “I’m sorry! I didn’t know you’d-”

“It’s alright, I know you mean well” I said trying to comfort him “I’ll be good by Wednesday and I can start training again.”

Fast forward to Wednesday, in Recovery Girl’s office with Midnight.

“Ok Miss Palma, you can start training again. Just make sure you don’t over exert yourself.”

“Thank you Recovery Girl!”

“How did her other analysis go?” asked Midnight.

“As for her other health analysis, asthma stayed the same, cholesterol is normal, blood work is normal, stress is a factor we need to work on and same for mental health. Mindful practices are good for stress and body, please seek help when you’re in your homesick phases for a healthy outlet other than crying.”

“I know” I said softly “often I find myself in those phases when I’m alone or late night so it’s a bit hard to reach out to somebody to talk to. But I do want to cope and control my stress better.”

“We can arrange something then, if you can’t reach a peer, you can always reach me.” said Midnight putting their hand on my back.

It’s after school and I walk to the dorms, just to sort through my thoughts and when was the last time I cried. Nothing really eventful was happening when I got to my dorm so I just shut myself in for the evening to do homework. Some of the boys were scheming,

“Guys I can’t take this anymore!” said Mineta flailing his arms “aren’t you a little curious to see what is in Palma-san’s room?!”

“Just leave her be!” said Sero “what do you want see so badly that’s in her room?”

“Her secrets! All the things she’s hiding from us!” Mineta said standing on the couch “think about it! Every time she does anything, its a secret she’s been hiding from us. She has a bigger room than us and I bet she has kept all her secrets in her closet.”

“Do you know what” said Aoyama as he sat up from the floor “I’ve noticed that too! Plus she hardly makes any noise when she is in her room that it’s a bit suspicious.”

“Wait! remember when she said she has a car?” said Kirishima suddenly realizing something “she mentioned that Iida kept that secret along with other secrets, that means that Iida knows her whole secret facade.”

The boys get wide eyed and run to Iida’s room and knock on his door.

“Yes? is there something wrong?”

“We need to talk Iida-kun” said Mineta.

“About?”

“You keeping Palma-san’s secrets” said Kirishima getting in his face.

“Yes she has confided in me to keep her secrets, what of it?”

“We need answers! What and why does she hide so many things?” confronted Aoyama “and why doesn’t she trust us?”

“Look not even I know if I have the full truth, all I know is that she’s been through a lot since landing in Japan.”

“A likely story from someone that knows all her secrets” said Mineta slyly “are these secrets the reasons why you won’t confess to her?”

“Get out of my room!”

They boys get kicked out of Iida’s room but they’re persistent to know what’s the deal with her. Fast forward to Saturday, day of some quirk training with some 1-B students.

“Ok I’m off yall! Be back by sunset!” I said as I teleport off.

Little to everyone’s knowledge, Mineta sneaks into her room.

“I have ventured into the forbidden garden” he said taking a deep sniff of the fragrant air “what secrets hide in her desk?”

He shuffles through all the stationary on the desk and sees some framed pictures of her family back home on the desk. He picks them up to take a closer look and sees a picture of her with a boy, holding hands and the boy kissing her on the forehead.

“A secret boyfriend?! No way!” he said realizing that there’s no other explanation on who this boy is. He puts the framed picture back and looks through the drawers, nothing that stands out other than everything is separated by color and there’s a lot of black clothes in the mix. He looks through the vanity and sees of professional grade make up.

“Why does she have all this? She has naturally clear skin and does eye makeup at most.” He put all the makeup back and goes to the closet. He sees the mini tv and console were moved to reveal all her coats, dresses, uniforms and swim suits. At the top there was labeled boxes that said things like Drag, Sewing, Cultural things but a box that caught his eye was one labeled ‘???’. Curious, he took the box down and opened it to find random items like beads, shells, a lighter and dried flowers. He puts it back and sees that she has both skirts and pant uniforms.

“Why does she have both?” he said as his gaze was turned to a garment bag with her name and 2 numbers on a white card in the clear pocket of the bag. “What in the world is this?” He unzipped it to find a red uniform with metal buttons, an embroidered K on the breast, the word Knights on the upper arms and black suspender pants.

“She was training to be a knight?” he said as he zipped it back up and looked at the bottom of the closet and saw all her shoes, nothing unusual there. Some exercise equipment in a wicker basket that ranged from boxing gloves, brass knuckles and jump rope sparked some questions. Behind that was a red and white plastic box, upon opening it was a back military type hat with a metal sliver star crest on the front. On the inside of the lid it said in her handwriting, “NEVER FORGET YOUR DREAMS AND HOW HAPPY THEY MADE YOU”

“What the? How does she have all these things?” he questioned he put the hat back in the box. He moves on the night stand near the bed, there were some strange items like small canisters and ointment tubes that were in Spanish. Along with those items were pain medications, vitamins and cold medicine, nothing strange for that drawer. In the bigger bottom drawer, there were cables and chargers for different devices along with some of those said devices. As he was searching through the drawer, Kaminari notices that the door is open and Mineta was inside.

“DUDE YOU’RE ACTUALLY GOING THROUGH HER STUFF?!”

“AHH DON’T SCARE ME LIKE THAT!”

This yelling caught the attention of the other boys and came rushing in.

“What are you doing?! This is so wrong” said Sato.

“Guys lets get out before Iida-kun or Palma-san come back!” said Midoriya in fear.

“But guys I found a lot of things she’s been keeping from us!” Mineta said pointing at the framed pictures on the desk “she has a secret boyfriend!” then he pointed to the closet “and she has both the boys and girls uniform PLUS an official military uniform, hat and everything!”

The boys started to murmur to each other about these new found evidence. Mineta starts to look under her pillows to find any thing strange and found a rosary.

“Look! she has one of those Jesus necklace thingys!” he said as he held it up for everyone to see. The boys murmur even more and Mineta notices black feathers between the nightstand and the bed on the floor and how oddly similar they look like Tokoyami’s. He bend over to pick one up and sees that there was a whole bunch of flat storage containers under the bed.

“LOOK! she has more stuff under the bed!” he said as he lifted the comforter sheet that was draped just enough to hide the containers “not only that but I found some of Tokoyami-san’s feathers here on the floor.”

Everyone turned to Tokoyami and he started to sweat “Oh that’s strange hehehe what does she need with those?”

“Tokoyami-kun.... did you and Palma-senpai...” started Todoroki and Tokoyami was sweating harder “get into copy training too?”

He exhaled in relief “yes we did, I just she wanted to see if she can copy my mutation and she can.” The boys didn’t think anything else of it and peered at what Mineta was taking out. They see her weapons used for field work, live and rubber ammo, Short staffs that look custom made and arm wraps.

“I understand the weapons and ammo” started Bakugo “but the staffs and arm wraps? I’ve never seen her train or use them when we train! So why the hell does she have them!?”

Mineta puts them back and takes out a shoe box that looks like it held her pink running shoes. Upon opening, they see that it has a cards, letters and notes all filed neatly. They skim through and find some recent ones from her passing the exam and 2 confession notes.

“Oh these are all the notes and cards she’s ever received from people, how sentimental and sweet Palma-san really is!” fawned Kota.

“Some of these are from America! Look at the dates on those ones” said Kirishima pointing at a few cards and heart shaped letters “those ones date a year back!”

Mineta puts them back and pulls out a large container and inside was her feminine hygiene products and a wand massager but to the boys, they had no clue what they were. “What are these wrapped things? Gauze or something?”

“Look theres chocolates in there too! and one of those fancy back massagers!” said Sato “and... what is that? extra toothpaste?” It wasn’t toothpaste, it was body safe lube but they didn’t pay attention to it and moved on to the next container. They opened a slightly heavier one and it was filled with American, Mexican and Japanese snacks and sweets. The boys gasped at the sight of such a stash!

“Look at all these snacks! Hot Cheetos? chamoy? Skittles? JOLLY RANCHERS?! I HAVEN’T EVEN HEARD OF SOME OF THESE?!” exclaimed Mineta “how is she getting her hands on all these? She doesn’t go grocery shopping or gets packages sent here!”

“Palma-san has strange taste in snacks, most of these are spicy and salty, even the things labeled as candy!” observed Shoji as he picked up a sandia con chile lollipop.

Iida hears all the squabbling from his room and walks out to see where it’s coming from and sees that Palma’s room is wide open and peers in to his horror. “WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!” he yelled as the boys are opening another box “I didn’t think you would try it! I’m so disappointed in you all!”

“It was Mineta!” said everyone as they pointed to him “we came in later!”

“IIDA-KUN! She’s hiding so many things that don’t make sense!” said Mineta defensively “Like who’s that kissing her in that picture! and the non-school uniform in her closet!”

“And the short staffs under her bed! And her stash of snacks! And these gauze packs! And-”

“ENOUGH! Get out of her room! It’s near sunset and she’ll be here any moment now!”

The boys look out the window to see the sun reaching the horizon and Palma teleporting to the front of the dorms with a box. They all panicked to put everything back and fixed her bed. They all scrambled to get out of her room and Mineta and Sero were still in the room when they heard her walking toward her room and unlocked her door. Mineta hid in the closet and Sero under the bed. They see her walk in as she took off her shoes and put the box on the floor. She did a stress groan so loud it startled them, then she took off her jacket and shirt to reveal her scratches from her training session.

“oof, better put some ointment after my shower....where did I put my towel?” I said as I reached for my towel that wasn’t on it’s usual spot on the hamper. “Odd, could’ve sworn I put my towel on the hamper-” I stopped and saw that my drawers weren’t closed all the way “fuckin Mina better have washed whatever she put back this time!” I said as I closed the drawers and opened the top one to find some clean underwear and socks “wonder if I’m gonna get some comforting today~” I say giggling not knowing that the boys are watching and hearing me. I choose my black set of underwear with thigh highs and pair them with a non-suspecting pj pants and t-shirt “there! just so he has something to pull to reveal~” I say as I turn to get my bath caddy to wash up. I drop one of my body scrubs and it rolled into my closet “I don’t remember having opened that side of my closet? Or did I?”. Mineta knew it was game over when I said that, I opened my closet and see him shaking. I close the closet door and yell “ok, you have to the count of 5 to come out before I rip you a new functioning butthole” as I flipped open my switch blade.

“1.....2....5!” and I see Mineta and Sero dash out of their hiding spots “You pieces of shit WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY ROOM!?”

“WE CAN EXPLAIN! WE-”

“SHUT UP! GET OUT!” I yelled waving my switch blade.

They leave and I shut my door in anger.

I showered and dressed, feeling a bit fucked up over everything and checked if anything was taken, nothing is missing so I opened my box and took out my fresh supply of feminine hygiene and to my horror, Midnight added a box of condoms with a note that said ‘nothing against the rules for having some stress-relieving fun, be safe!’. I think oh damn really? but then I look at all my options and think nah, these boys ain’t worth my virginity even if I’m getting casual with Tokoyami. I put them away and have my down time, I don’t want to face anybody because of this whole mess. I wait for everyone to go into their rooms so I can eat in peace, as I’m chopping my cucumber, Tokoyami walks in.

“Hey Ita~”

“Oh jeez you scared me!”

“Sorry! It’s just that I heard what happened”

“oh.... yea” I said stressed as I ate some cucumber.

“Are you ok?”

“Yea but I don’t know why my room?” I said grabbing a disposable bowl from the cabinet to put my fruit in “I thought you guys trusted me enough not to seek for truths.”

“I do! But I’m going to fill you in on what they saw.” He then tells me everything and I get mortified.

“You saw my under the bed storage too!” I said as I got red and hid my face “how embarrassing!”

“I mean it didn’t look like much but like, why do you have so much gauze and a fancy back massager? Thats what I want to know.”

“Oh um thats not gauze or a back massager... It’s....” I said as I leaned in to whisper what they actually are.

“Oh?....Ohhhhh!...” he said getting flustered “I mean if it’s stimulation you want, I can be of service” as put his hand on my butt.

“That’s very erm- generous of you but I’m not ready to have those strong feelings” I said as I caressed his face “I’m scared that I’m going to get hurt or get used if I let myself be exposed like that, I’m still too young to have a sexual partner and so are you.”

He muzzled up to me “Sorry I pushed myself like that Ita, I understand now”

I held him closer “I’m glad that you’re considerate of my feelings, but that doesn’t mean what we’ve been doing is out of the question~” I said as I traced his beak with my knuckle. We spent the night together in soft and playful caressing and kissing in my room with the usual teleporting him to his room in the morning, pretending nothing happened the night before. I go in the bathroom to do my thing and the song to bop to was Neon Trees- Everybody Talks and I proceed to shave my peach fuzz.

“I love this song but what in the actual fuck are you doing Palma-san?” questioned Kaminari

“I’m shaving my face, duh”

“Girls do that too?!” exclaimed Mineta.

“Yea thats how girls manage to have smooth skin on their faces” I said as I move on to my upper lip.

“Wow thats so cool Palma-san!” Midoriya said with admiration “I wish I had enough facial hair to shave.”

I prepare the Texas Smash of roasts for this broccoli on this day “Well maybe if you spent less time watching Blues Clues, puberty would probably hit you finally.”

The bathroom explodes with that roast of the decade! I get high fives and chest bumps from the Baku-squad and Midoriya never really recovered from that roast.

“Oh my gosh Palma-san, you’re a riot to be around!” said Kirishima wiping the tears from laughing too hard away “a true honorary bro!”

I finish up my routine and left the bathroom shortly after then the boys started talking.

“What a gal! Iida when are you gonna make a move?” said Tokoyami “better say it soon or I’m swooping in.”

“I’m not worried about it” said Iida confidently “she’s not going to get wandering eyes or lips. Her number one thing is her training and studies.”

Tokoyami, fully remembering the last few nights they’ve spent groping and kissing, gives a face of doubt “Erm if you say so Iida-kun, she can’t be tamed so easily...she has provoking thoughts and feelings about intimacy.”

Everyone shuts off the water and looks at Tokoyami, “Excuse me but how do you know about her feelings and intimacy?” asked Aoyama.

Tokoyami realized he fucked up started to panic a bit “well... uh you know we’ve been spending a lot of time together in the evenings just talking about stuff...”

“Are you saying that you’ve been in her room with her...after lights out?! just talking?” Mineta said putting 2 and 2 together “it kinda looks like you’ve been sneaking through the secret garden at midnight, tasting forbidden fruits!”

Meanwhile I get my ass in the kitchen for my coffee and I hear the gasp of boys from the kitchen and wonder if everything was alright. But I didn’t really care because I had to head out for some weapons review with my squad for out quiz on Tuesday. What happened after I left is that the boys found out partly of Tokoyami’s and mine nightly talks. The boys wait for me to come back to confront me about it.

“Oh hello fellas! whats poppin?”

“Oh you know, just chilling, talking about stuff” said Mineta stressing on the last part.

“Cool, any y’all wanna-”

“WE KNOW ABOUT YOUR QUALITY TIME WITH TOKOYAMI!” blurted out Midoriya.

Play it cool, maybe he didn’t tell them everything “you mean the talks we have about life questions and feelings? What about them?”

“It is true that there’s kissing and groping involved?” asked Iida like he was upset with me.

“Yea, once by accident. It was just an quick peck on my bottom lip, I didn’t kiss back or have done anything that could’ve been lewd or intimate with him.”

“But it was still a kiss that he took while you were alone!” said Iida with aggressive chops.

“IF YOU HAVE SUCH A PROBLEM WITH ME ABOUT IT, WHY DON’T YOU JUST KISS ME!”

Everyone gasped and I recollected myself to stand by my feelings, theres no way I’d let them cuck me! Then Kaminari comes up to me and holds me close and went in for the kiss then chickened out and just gave a peck on the cheek.

“You fucking pussy ass bitch, cheek pecks are for grandmas that bake you cookies!” I said wiping my cheek “I have so much liberty to do much more explicit things but honestly, none of you have shown me the type of intimacy I want. So if we’re all done here, I’m hungry and I want some fast food, I was gonna ask who wants to come with me but it seems like yall too busy fighting over shit that doesn’t matter so I guess I’m ridin’ solo on this one.”

I stomped to my room to get my keys and wallet and teleported out with my room locked. While I took my solo ride to McDonalds to buy $15 worth of food, Iida went to Aizawa sensei to tell him about my shenanigans.

“Kid, why are you so concerned about her?”

“Because she’s endangering herself with these promiscuous actions!”

“She’s allowed to do all this and way more. Also she’s technically not my student to look after, not that she needs it”

“What do you mean?”

“There was a huge mix up with her file information and as of now, she’s going to her proper dorms beginning of 2nd year.”

“But what about-”

“Look, you wouldn’t say all this if you saw her standing in the program. She’s number 1 international student, number 3 in her class, number 5 in the district wide 1-A in her program and if she was in our program... a close 2nd.”

“I see.... but is what she’s doing really acceptable?”

“Yes, but also lets keep a close eye on her emotions, she has a doctor’s note that she has to practice mindfulness and lower her stress.”

They both hear me teleport back and run back to my room.

“I better go and-”

“It’s best if you don’t, let her seek you out at her own pace.”

Iida walks out to the commons room and sees everyone with concerned and worried faces.

“what did sensei say?” asked Todoroki.

“He said to leave her alone until she’s ready to talk about things” he said shifting his gaze to her room “she’s not doing anything wrong, we’re the ones in the wrong by intruding in her personal space.”

Everyone kind of lingers near her room to listen to what she’s doing, but all they hear is rustling of food wrappers and soft weeping with the lights off. Little to their knowledge, she saw something so heartbreaking on their social media that it broke her into seeking the numbing comfort of the flask in her vanity. Right under their noses, she had slipped into silent depression and the next few days were going to be painful to live through. Nobody really noticed but Mimi and Jin did and they tried their best to let themselves be available to be a non-problematic source of support. But the numbness held me back to really seek them out or Midnight. Putting on the mask of ‘everything is fine’ was getting hard to maintain and I’ve pushed away all of Iida’s and Tokoyami’s invitations for comfort or accompanying. I didn’t even have the energy to change out my wilting flowers or go buy fresh ones, I was losing myself and I was getting scared. One week has passed and I was completely shut in for the weekend, no extra training scheduled, homework done and no desire to leave my room.

“Hey Iida-kun, did you invite Palma-san to our water training today?” asked Kaminari “it’s a bit late and she isn’t up yet.”

“She doesn’t want to talk, no matter what I’ve been trying” said Iida as he walked down the stairs to meet up with the others “maybe she’ll come around this weekend.”

Everyone went to the pool to do training and I didn’t know when I woke up and didn’t see anybody. I took this as time to shape up a bit as my drinking was making me feel terrible and I needed to work on new techniques. I pack my training bag and headed to the padded room at school with Muffin 2.0. I do my thing and start to feel better as I’m getting a sweat going, then I hear splashing and hollering over my music. I levitate up to the window that faced the pool and saw everyone there, they didn’t invite me I thought and felt hurt all over again. I slowly floated down like a deflated balloon and curled up in a ball to cry.

“Itati, I sense your distress, do you want me to contact someone?”

“No don’t! I’m alright!”

“Now calling Midnight.....she didn’t answer the phone but I sent her a message with your location and state of distress.”

That made me feel worse and I just stayed in my ball form as I idly floated around and bounced off the walls, as I do when I’m upset. Midnight came running in 10 minutes later in the padded room and gasped at my state of being.

“Oh sweetie! What happened?!”

“I don’t want to talk about it!”

She wanted to talk me down from the ceiling and then heard the splashing and hollering from the pool. She then figured it out.

“Is it because they didn’t include you? You love swimming.”

I float down to her and I explain what I’ve gone through. She sat next to me and listened until I was done explaining.

“...so now I feel more hurt but I know it’s all my doing on this one. I don’t want to feel this way anymore.”

Midnight gave me a hug “You can’t catch a break huh? Lets get you back in the dorms and washed up so we can talk about some mindfulness.”

“Ok but umm” I said as I turned my head to the door “I don’t want to get seen by them, I don’t think I’ll be able to hold myself together if they see me.”

“I’ll shield you and shoo them away if they get too close, I promise they won’t bother you on our walk to the dorms.”

We start our walk with Muffin 2.0 carrying my things, we get close to the pool deck and I lower my head into the collar of my jacket to hide myself. Midnight’s shielding didn’t divert Iida’s sharp gaze from Palma’s pink tracksuit and her rhinestoned training bag. He ran out the gate and called out to her.

“Ita? Ita?! are you alright?”

“Tenya please, she doesn’t want to be seen by you right now.”

“But what happened? I-”

“It’s a lot to repeat right now, please give her space, she’s not in the best mental state right now to be bothered.”

Iida stands there as Midnight and Palma walk away with Muffin 2.0 following behind toward the dorms. Midnight helped by getting me back on my regime and scheduling out my week to include meditation and lessen my social media time. And I was slowly coming back to my usual self but I didn’t tell anybody what I did during that week.

-Thursday, in Homeroom-

“Matsui, Oleshin, Palma....may I have a word with you three outside?” said Diya firmly with his arms crossed.

We got scared and our minds raced with possibilities of what we could be in trouble for. We get to the hallway where sensei was and we were sweating bullets.

“You aren’t in trouble, lets get that out of the way” he said and we instantly exhaled in relief “the school asked me to ask you three if you’d do something for culture week thats coming up. Their reasoning is that we’ve never had international students from Korea, Mexico nor Russia.”

“Oh I see!” I spoke up “they want us to get extra and educate on our home cultures.”

“This is my chance to wear my fur hats!” Mimi perked up “and not wear pants!”

“YOU’RE RIGHT! I can sport all traditional robes!” said Jin with sudden excitement.

“I’ll take that as a yes, it’s in 2 weeks and I’ll be giving you more info about it when they give me a full plan.”

I feel astronomically better but that homesickness is still there. We plan out our dress up outfits and what to talk about through out the week. I hid this from everyone outside the program as it was pleasant surprise and I wanted everyone to understand my roots better.

-End Chapter 11-

#bnha #mha #self insert au #Chapter 11 #not canon #will update regularly #ask me anything

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pamphletstoinspire · 7 years ago

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THE BOOK OF ECCLESIASTES- From The Douay-Rheims Bible - Latin Vulgate

Chapter 9

INTRODUCTION

This Book is called Ecclesiastes, or the preacher, (in Hebrew, Coheleth) because in it Solomon, as an excellent preacher, setteth forth the vanity of the things of this world, to withdraw the hearts and affections of men from such empty toys. Ch. --- Coheleth is a feminine noun, to indicate the elegance of the discourse. It is very difficult to discriminate the objections of free-thinkers from the real sentiments of the author. It is most generally supposed that Solomon wrote this after his repentance; but this is very uncertain. S. Jerom (in C. xii. 12.) informs us that the collectors of the sacred books had some scruple about admitting this; and Luther speaks of it with great disrespect: (Coll. conviv.) but the Church has always maintained its authority. See Conc. v. Act. 4. Philast. 132. C. --- It refutes the false notions of worldlings, concerning felicity; and shews that it consists in the service of God and fruition. W.

Verses are in English and Latin. HAYDOCK CATHOLIC BIBLE COMMENTARY

TRANSCRIBER'S NOTES

Changes made to the original text for this transcription include the following:

Accent marks. The original text contains some English letters represented with accent marks. In this transcription, those letters have been rendered in this transcription without their accent marks.

Other special characters.

Solid horizontal lines of various lengths that appear in the original text have been represented as a series of consecutive hyphens of approximately the same length, such as ---.

The half symbol (1/2) and three-quarters symbol (3/4) in the original text have been represented in this transcription with their decimal equivalent, (.5) and (.75) respectively.

Unreadable text. Places where the transcriber's copy of the original text is unreadable have been indicated in this transcription by an empty set of square brackets, [].

Chapter 9

Man knows not certainty that he is in God's grace. After death no more work or merit.

[1] All these things have I considered in my heart, that I might carefully understand them: there are just men and wise men, and their works are in the hand of God: and yet man knoweth not whether he be worthy of love, or hatred:

Omnia haec tractavi in corde meo, ut curiose intelligerem. Sunt justi atque sapientes, et opera eorum in manu Dei; et tamen nescit homo utrum amore an odio dignus sit.

[2] But all things are kept uncertain for the time to come, because all things equally happen to the just and to the wicked, to the good and to the evil, to the clean and to the unclean, to him that offereth victims, and to him that despiseth sacrifices. As the good is, so also is the sinner: as the perjured, so he also that sweareth truth.

Sed omnia in futurum servantur incerta, eo quod universa aeque eveniant justo et impio, bono et malo, mundo et immundo, immolanti victimas et sacrificia contemnenti. Sicut bonus, sic et peccator; ut perjurus, ita et ille qui verum dejerat.

[3] This is a very great evil among all things that are done under the sun, that the same things happen to all men: whereby also the hearts of the children of men are filled with evil, and with contempt while they live, and afterwards they shall be brought down to hell.

Hoc est pessimum inter omnia quae sub sole fiunt : quia eadem cunctis eveniunt. Unde et corda filiorum hominum implentur malitia et contemptu in vita sua, et post haec ad inferos deducentur.

[4] There is no man that liveth always, or that hopeth for this: a living dog is better than a dead lion.

Nemo est qui semper vivat, et qui hujus rei habeat fiduciam; melior est canis vivus leone mortuo.

[5] For the living know that they shall die, but the dead know nothing more, neither have they a reward any more: for the memory of them is forgotten.

Viventes enim sciunt se esse morituros; mortui vero nihil noverunt amplius, nec habent ultra mercedem, quia oblivioni tradita est memoria eorum.

[6] Their love also, and their hatred, and their envy are all perished, neither have they any part in this world, and in the work that is done under the sun.

Amor quoque, et odium, et invidiae simul perierunt; nec habent partem in hoc saeculo, et in opere quod sub sole geritur.

[7] Go then, and eat thy bread with joy, and drink thy wine with gladness: because thy works please God.

Vade ergo, et comede in laetitia panem tuum, et bibe cum gaudio vinum tuum, quia Deo placent opera tua.

[8] At all times let thy garments be white, and let not oil depart from thy head.

Omni tempore sint vestimenta tua candida, et oleum de capite tuo non deficiat.

[9] Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest, all the days of thy unsteady life, which are given to thee under the sun, all the time of thy vanity: for this is thy portion in life, and in thy labour wherewith thou labourest under the sun.

Perfruere vinum cum uxore quam diligis, cunctis diebus vitae instabilitatis tuae, qui dati sunt tibi sub sole omni tempore vanitatis tuae : haec est enim pars in vita et in labore tuo quo laboras sub sole.

[10] Whatsoever thy hand is able to do, do it earnestly: for neither work, nor reason, nor wisdom, nor knowledge shall be in hell, whither thou art hastening.

Quodcumque facere potest manus tua, instanter operare, quia nec opus, nec ratio, nec sapientia, nec scientia erunt apud inferos, quo tu properas.

[11] I turned me to another thing, and I saw that under the sun, the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, nor bread to the wise, nor riches to the learned, nor favour to the skillful: but time and chance in all.

Verti me ad aliud, et vidi sub sole nec velocium esse cursum, nec fortium bellum, nec sapientium panem, nec doctorum divitias, nec artificum gratiam; sed tempus casumque in omnibus.

[12] Man knoweth not his own end: but as fishes are taken with the hook, and as birds are caught with the snare, so men are taken in the evil time, when it shall suddenly come upon them.

Nescit homo finem suum; sed sicut pisces capiuntur hamo, et sicut aves laqueo comprehenduntur, sic capiuntur homines in tempore malo, cum eis extemplo supervenerit.

[13] This wisdom also I have seen under the sun, and it seemed to me to be very great:

Hanc quoque sub sole vidi sapientiam, et probavi maximam :

[14] A little city, and few men in it: there came against it a great king, and invested it, and built bulwarks round about it, and the siege was perfect.

civitas parva, et pauci in ea viri; venit contra eam rex magnus, et vallavit eam, exstruxitque munitiones per gyrum, et perfecta est obsidio.

[15] Now there was found in it a man poor and wise, and he delivered the city by his wisdom, and no man afterward remembered that poor man.

Inventusque est in ea vir pauper et sapiens, et liberavit urbem per sapientiam suam; et nullus deinceps recordatus est hominis illius pauperis.

[16] And I said that wisdom is better than strength: how then is the wisdom of the poor man slighted, and his words not heard?

Et dicebam ego meliorem esse sapientiam fortitudine. Quomodo ergo sapientia pauperis contempta est, et verba ejus non sunt audita?

[17] The words of the wise are heard in silence, more than the cry of a prince among fools.

Verba sapientium audiuntur in silentio, plus quam clamor principis inter stultos.

[18] Better is wisdom, than weapons of war: and he that shall offend in one, shall lose many good things.

Melior est sapientia quam arma bellica; et qui in uno peccaverit, multa bona perdet.

Commentary:

Ver. 1. Of God. He seems to treat both alike, so that the just themselves cannot say whether their sufferings be a punishment or a trial. S. Jer. C. --- Knoweth not certainly, and in an ordinary manner. W. --- Hatred. Heb. and Sept. "yet love and hatred man knoweth not." H. --- Prosperity or adversity proves nothing. C. --- Mortals cannot tell whether their afflictions tend to their greater improvement, like Job's, or they are in punishment of sin, like those of Pharao, and of the Egyptians. This they shall know after death. W. --- Yet the wicked know already that they are displeasing to God. Salmeron in 2 Cor. xii. "The just and...their works are in the hand of God, even love and hatred; men know not," &c. Dieu. Amama.

Ver. 2. But. Heb. joins this with the preceding not, "by all that is before them. All things come alike to all, there is one event to," &c. Prot. H. --- The pagans distinguished real goods and evils from those which were only apparent, like prosperity and adversity, which are determined only by the good or bad use. S. Jer. --- Thus religion looks upon virtue and vice in the former light; and riches, poverty, &c. in the latter. It may be difficult to decide, whether, under adversity, the just have supported themselves better by virtue, or the wicked by vanity. God will manifest the truth. C. --- Perjured. Heb. and Sept. "swearer, so he that fears an oath." H.

Ver. 3. Evil. People hence take occasion to indulge in vice, (C. viii. 14.) though the conduct of God be irreproachable. C. --- Shall. Heb. "they go to the dead." H. --- Many think that these are the sentiments of the impious.

Ver. 4. There. Even those who have had the vanity to claim divine honours, never could persuade themselves that they would escape death. But the just forms a different conclusion from the wicked. He looks upon his life only as a preparation for the other, (Heb. xi. 13. Eph. ii. 19.) while libertines make haste to enjoy the fleeting pleasure. Is. xxii. 13. To the former death seems desirable, (C. iv. 2. and vi. 3.) to the latter it is a subject of consternation; and he prefers the vilest creature living, to the most noble when dead. C. --- Heb. "for whosoever is chosen (yebuchar. Marg. yechubar, "is united") to all the living, has hope; for a," &c. H. --- Moderns generally follow the marginal reading of the Masorets. C. --- "For who shall live for ever?" Sym. "Who partakes with all the living? There is hope." Sept. H. --- During life alone the sinner may amend. C. ii. 3. The Gentiles are preferred before the Jews. W.

Ver. 5. Know nothing more, viz. As to the transactions of this world, in which they have now no part, unless it be revealed to them; neither have they any knowledge or power now of doing any thing to secure their eternal state, (if they have not taken care of it in their lifetime) nor can they now procure themselves any good, as the living always may do, by the grace of God. Ch.

Ver. 7. God. Be grateful to him, and make a good use of his benefits, (S. Jer. exp. 2.) or these are the words of libertines. Boss. S. Jer. 1. explicat. C.

Ver. 8. White. As in times of joy, and among people of quality. C. x. 17. Prov. xxxi. 23. --- Head. Our Saviour reproaches the Pharisees for neglecting this. Lu. vii. 45.

Ver. 9. Wife. Some translate, "the woman," or harlot; as if the wicked still spoke.

Ver. 10. Earnestly. Live in delights, or perform many good works. C. ii. 5. Our Lord seems to allude to this passage. What thou dost, do quickly. Jo. xiii. 27.

Ver. 11. All. Thus it appears to the inattentive, and to the wicked. For Solomon frequently inculcates that Providence directs all wisely. Human industry is not always attended with success. Deut. xxix. 19. This is a fresh proof of the vanity of all things. C.

Ver. 12. With. Heb. adds, "evil." Net, (Mont.) or hook. H. --- Them. They may use precautions; but, without God's aid, they will not succeed. Ps. cxxvi. 1. C.

Ver. 14. And the siege, &c. Heb. has only "great bulwarks over or against it." H.

Ver. 15. Afterward, is not in Heb. The poor man was unnoticed before. C. --- Vulg. insinuates that he met with no return of gratitude, which is but too common; (H.) and this shews the vanity of the world.

Ver. 16. Heard? Eccli. xiii. 28. Men are so unjust as to despise wisdom, if it be in a poor man. The prudence of an individual has often saved cities, as was the case at Abela, and Bethulia; (2 K. xx. 22. C.) and Syracuse was defended a long time by Archimedes against the whole Roman army. Plut. in Marcel.

Ver. 17. Fools. Though the wise often meet with contempt, it is only among fools, who form the majority. C. --- Vain declaimers in the Church shew their own folly, as well as that of their hearers. S. Jer.

Ver. 18. Things. A woman saved Abela; and Achan almost ruined Israel. Want of prudence in a general is often fatal. Virtues are connected, as well as vices. C. - For one transgression, many acts of virtue are lost. S. Jer.

#the book of ecclesiastes

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serenagaywaterford · 6 years ago

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16) another thing that connected them in S2. Motherhood. Which is weird. Bc Serena is delusional about Nicole being hers. k) "how nobody really paid proper attention when it was building."And I mean, isn't this INCREDIBLY realistic and terrifying? Being inactive, indifferent about others and especially apolitical and undermining the threat...History is like a circle, always repeating itself in the end. I may be critical of the series, but its political observations are always on point. Like

17) that episode where June is separated from Hannah (at the same time the US-Mexico border crossing takes place). l) "Nobody deserves what those women get but it’s important to think critically about these characters and if June recognises she was idle until it was too late, I think as viewers we should be able to say the same" June makes it VERY clear that she feels guilty about i. her last interactions with her mother, ii. her inactivity. That's not victim blaming. It goes WITHOUT saying that

18) that NO woman deserves Gilead. Period. m) "Although I am also someone who counts restorative justice as a viable option for some crimes. I don’t think punitive/retributive justice is always the answer." As if I didn't have enough reasons to like you. I'm with you and I hear you. However, I do understand that some methods are not very feasible IRL due to various limitations. Back to Serena. What do you think will happen to her on the show? Will she survive Gilead's destruction? Will she stand

19) a democratic trial for her crimes? Will she get killed before Gilead goes down? Will she get lynched by an angry mob? I think I'd like it if the series dived more into the dark subjects of mob mentality and eye-for-an-eye types of punishment, but with flipped roles. Sth along the lines of "Can some victims (and their families) become as cruel as the Gilead!criminals in their quest for revenge?" There are the particicutions and Emily's arc, but still. n) "Maybe you have a theory? It’s one of

20) those things I don’t get. Is it cos she’s jealous June has a child and she doesn’t? Is it just a power play thing?" I think it's a combination of both actually. In S1, it's clearly the latter. Serena's being cruel and manipulative: she lets Hannah briefly see her child in order to emotionally torture her. But in S2? It's mostly the former. Obviously, Serena is envious of June's pregnancy, why wouldn't she be of Hannah? Especially given that Hannah (unlike Nicole) comes from a happier place

21) time in June's life. (Aka "God has blessed this /immoral-sinful/ woman with 2 children, why not me?" That must stink.) Another reason that she denies her that time is bc she feels betrayed that her prisoner tries to manipulate her, instead of befriend her. *eye roll* Duh, Serena. (Aka "After everything I've done for her and this is how she repays me." Bitch. You've done NOTHING. Try again.) Her desire to connect with sb, bc she doesn't have anything/anyone left anymore, makes her

22) desperate and a little naive/dumb, lol.

---------

I am so onboard with k) to m)! I can’t really add anything more of value (or interest) lol cos to me it just seems so obvious. I don’t know why some people miss it. Although I think EVERYBODY was sort of knocked sideways by how relevant the Hannah/June thing was with current US events. Hit a little too close to home. And GOOD.

You’re very right. Restorative justice is limited by a lot of things, but in theory, I do find it a positive angle to approach some kinds of crime. It’s a small scale sort of thing, generally, and very time and effort intensive process.

As for Serena’s fate... OHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhh. Sometimes I don’t like to think that far down the line cos I honestly do not see her getting anything even remotely happy. How she ultimately is dealt with, I don’t know. It really depends on the points the show wants to make. Will it be hopeful, will it be retributive, will it be melodramatic, will it be depressing af? Do they care about how angry viewers will be? Do they have enough for Serena to DO to make it to the final seasons or will her usefulness as a character expire early? (I’d wager they’d want to keep Yvonne around as long as possible but I’m biased.)

Personally, I suspect she’ll be held accountable in a democratic legal system. Although the thing that makes me pause is how Tuello suggested she defect. He very much presented an idyllic future. Now, it could have been a lie to trick her into turning herself over to the (remaining) US for punishment. But, on the other hand, they seem to REALLY want her propaganda. I don’t totally doubt that they see Serena as more valuable as a source of intel/propaganda than to hold her accountable. At this stage, arresting and sentencing her for her crimes wouldn’t really accomplish much for the US yet in the grande scheme of things. IMO, anyway. She seems a better asset for them than a convict or POW locked away/dead somewhere.

>> “Will she get lynched by an angry mob? I think I'd like it if the series dived more into the dark subjects of mob mentality and eye-for-an-eye types of punishment, but with flipped roles. Sth along the lines of "Can some victims (and their families) become as cruel as the Gilead!criminals in their quest for revenge?" There are the particicutions and Emily's arc, but still."

I fucking LOVE this approach. It’s something I’ve rolled around with for quite a while. If you’re going to deal with mob mentality in terms of the creation and continuation of a fascist system, what about the other side of human reality? Mob mentality can easily swing the other way with the right tinder and spark. Like, we see absolutely justified anger and disgust by survivors/refugees in Canada and then comes the question of what constitutes reasonable reaction to such a repulsive regime. Is violent mob revenge the answer? (I honestly can’t make that determination. I’ve never been in anything remotely like war or fascism.) Maybe it is. Maybe it’s not. And it is the sort of thing I think THT could deal with. Like you said, it’s sort of touched upon with Emily. But put that on a large scale. Is violence sometimes the answer? Is war the only answer with totalitarian regimes? How to you truly hold war criminals responsible?

Of course there would be viewers praising a mob if they kill Serena. I’ve seen people admit as much on this hellsite. (I dunno if I can make a judgement on that either but I personally find that perspective incredibly problematic. But it begs the question: what is justice then?) I think it would be incredibly disturbing to see. Yet, I’m also someone who thought June should have shot them lol. (Not really truly. But I felt the urge to see it during that episode--when I got over the fact the box she was opening wasn’t actually crackers but shotgun shells lol. But it really doesn’t fit with June’s character. Like she considers killing Serena more than once (3 times IIRC), but never does because it’s simply not right and she’s not that sort of person.)

Personally speaking, I don’t want Serena killed. Other characters, I hope die in painful ways. *coughfredcough* *coughallthemeninpowercough* But having her killed by a mob would be quite impactful. And not, imo, all that unrealistic. I just don’t want it. I don’t need absolutely everything to be brutally honest and realistic. Gimme some of that feelgood hope lmao.

>> Another reason that she denies her that time is bc she feels betrayed that her prisoner tries to manipulate her, instead of befriend her. *eye roll* Duh, Serena. (Aka "After everything I've done for her and this is how she repays me." Bitch. You've done NOTHING. Try again.) Her desire to connect with sb, bc she doesn't have anything/anyone left anymore, makes her 22) desperate and a little naive/dumb, lol.

WORD, LMAO. TO EVERY SINGLE WORD re: Serena/Hannah/etc. (ITA agree and thank you for your perspective on the Hannah thing!)

Like she’s so delusional/in such denial. Serena, girl, you’ve done literally nothing of actual substance for her and often times went out of your way to make things 100x more miserable for her and then wonder why she won’t be your BFF? Just cos you think your jail warden is your friend (Fred), doesn’t mean it’s actually true and transferable.

(I love it? (Not in the way that I think it’s good, morally. Just story/character-wise. It’s so interesting to me how weird and sad she is sometimes.))

In a way I actually feel sorry for Serena, even if she did get herself into this disaster, and she’s perpetuated it in the worse possible way she could. (She’s so unbelievably cruel, esp in S1, and then throws a tantrum when June doesn’t just fall into her arms, so to speak. C’mon, lady.) I think that's what I love about her character. She’s so wrong on so many levels, but she still evokes quite strong feelings the other way as well. Like, her growing desperation and loneliness and need for connection as Gilead goes on is actually... sad? I know many, many fans who bristle and word-vomit at just the suggestion of any such feelings towards her.

I dunno. I’m an idiot and a sucker cos I think when she actually connects with June (and loses the insecurity/jealousy), there’s a whole other person. It’s really fascinating how she changes. And switches back and forth. (Yeah, yeah, I’ve read the criticisms that that’s typical abuser behaviour but... ah. Like I said, me=sucker. I won’t deny I totally understand it but. Gah. I think it’s more complex. Am I woobifying? Yikes. I hope not.)

#Anonymous

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topicprinter · 7 years ago

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Few years ago, one of my best friends, took to a 24-hour flight to visit me. He had (still has, I should say) a brilliant career as a shoes designer. We always spend quality time together and he is one of those fiends who keeps your brain stimulated. I love that. One night, after a lovely dinner and some good wine, we started to speak about regrets. He said this:"I really enjoy what I'm doing. However, my biggest regret is not having a degree."In my head that sounded like one of those massive gongs going off in a Buddhist temple. Back in the days, I studied accounting. When I finished, I started a degree in Psychology, did a bunch of exams but never completed it. Time goes by, I started a career and most importantly a family. In this scenario, most of the people assume that going back to Uni is impossible. Days are so full on! When you get home at night you just feel like watching a movie on the couch. With a nice glass of Pinot Noir, obviously. ;- ) That was me.Anyway, a couple of weeks after that night, the gong was still echoing inside my head. I was exactly in my friend's position. I was enjoying what I was doing but regretting the fact that I did not fully completed a degree. I could not let it go for some reasons. In my private and professional life, I always have been a curious person. I enjoy understanding the reason behind words and facts. Professionally, I always felt I wanted to broaden my knowledge in the marketing and management fields. I used to read books, watching videos and ultimately, subscribing to Udemy courses. But it was not enough. Having a degree does not make you smarter or more successful, but it definitely gives you a deep understanding about a specific topic. Not to mention the satisfaction of saying "YES, I made it!".I then started to look around and make some enquiries to various universities. Fees and compulsory attendance were the first road blocks. Way too much money and restrictions. Luckily, sometimes ... I can be stubborn. I kept researching, researching and researching. One day I bump into this friend of mine and I tell her about my idea of starting to study again. After a while she goes like "You should speak to my friend Helen, she is a student counsellor. She might be able to give you a suggestion."Hence, I did speak to her. And guess what? 20 exams later with 4 to go, I still cannot believe I have made it so far.How I did itAs I said, time and costs were the main constraints to me. With a full time job, I knew for sure that I was not able to go to class. The only way to do it, was to have something flexible that I could adapt to my schedule. Helen recommended me to check out a website. I did not have any clue about the existence of it and it was exactly what I was looking for.The site I am talking about is Open University Australia (OUA).OUA was founded in 1993 as an online platform to offer quality education accessible to as many students as possible. In other words, OUA is an organization that has agreements with Australian leading universities. They help you making a bridge between the subjects, or the degree you want to complete, with the right University. Once you have picked the right path, you can graduate from the Uni offering that particular degree. The cool thing is that everything is done online. Pretty straight forward.The great benefits OUA offer are:1. They collaborate with all the major Universities in Australia offering a great variety of degrees;2. They give students total freedom of studying at their own pace;3. They offer 100% online content with exams venues spread out in an incredible number of countries;4. The fees are lower than a traditional University;5. The degree has exactly the same value of a "standard" Uni degree.6. The student service is incredibly professional and quick.To me, points 2 and 3 were no-brainers to give it a go.My tips to combine work-private life with studyingAs I mentioned before, studying while juggling all the aspects of life (particularly when working full time), can be overwhelming. It requires mental strengths, commitment and a lot of discipline. Imagine yourself coming back home after a 8/9 hours shift. You need to do some chores, dinner, talk to your partner, perhaps playing with the kids or taking out the dog for a walk... and after all of this, starting to work on a 5,000 words assignment. :-0 The question is, can you do it?The answer is YES!!! If I made it so far, everybody can do it. When you subscribe to Facebook groups or other student forums, you actually realize that you are not that special. Indeed, there are mothers of 3 or 4 kids out there, doing 2/3 subjects per study period (1SP = 3 months)! In France, they say "Chapeau" which means "respect". My total respect to these monsters.Here are my tips to nail it:1. Pick a subject that you really like.It does not matter what your age is. You need to study something that can bring value to your life. It can be personal, professional or just as a hobby, but you really need to enjoy it. Otherwise, you will not be able to study when you are stressed and tired.2. Pick the right provider.There are various organizations/universities offering online studies. What is the subject you want to study? Do your homework by selecting the best provider according to your needs. To me flexibility was my non-negotiable clause. What is your one? What are you willing to forgo?3. Stay focused on the final result.Once you start, the first couple of subjects are the toughest ones; particularly for people that are starting after a long break from study. Do not get frustrated if you do not have a clear idea of what is going on. You will find your own pace and a study system. Subscribe to Facebook pages or to the unit student forum. There are hundreds of students in your situation. The community can help you to overcome fear and give you great tips.One of the first things to do is to read thoroughly the unit outline and the assessments due dates. Every Unit is different not just in terms of content but also and moreover in terms of how it is structured by the convenor. You will soon experience yourself that not all the units are 100% student-friendly.4. Plan your schedule wisely.Some units require lots of reading. It is not uncommon going reading a 6/700 pages textbook. When do you go through that "brick-book"? Very often there are classes that are video recorded. I find them extremely useful. You need to allocate time to watch them. I can bet that, whatever the lecturer is explaining, it will be part of an assignment or the final exam. Participate to all the collaborative sessions with lecturer and other students. If you cannot attend, download the recording and watch it. During collaborative sessions you can gather hints for your assessments.5. Do not fall behind with the workload.Every spare time during the day is useful to keep yourself up to date with the unit. Which means: are you commuting with a public transport? Great time to read the textbook. Are you having 1 hour lunch break? Perfect to eat and watch the lecturer's video. Are you going for a run? Amazing, you can listen to the last collaborative session. You see? Now more than ever, time is precious.6. Tackle the assessments 1 by 1, section by section.What do I mean by this? Throughout the study period you will usually have 2 or 3 assessments to test your progression with the unit. The assessments will contribute to the final grade which is made of 50/60% assessments and 40/50% exam result. Hence, if you work hard with assessments, you will take off pressure the exam day. My main rule is to bring home as many marks as possible during the study period. Knowing that I need just 10 marks to get a pass in the exam, gives me a more relaxed state of mind. It makes me perform better.The second part of this tip is the "section by section" approach. I can guarantee you that every time I read the words report or essay with 3-5000 word count +/- 10% ..., I shiver. The next thought is "I'm never gonna finish it". The greatest trick ever here, is to make a skeleton of the project/essay and give yourself a time frame to complete section by section. For example, you do Introduction, History, Current situation, etc. and you then would say, "ok, tonight I need to do the introduction". Done. Next day you say, "ok, this weekend I need to do the history" and so forth. Start filling in the paper and keep going until the end. Once you submitted it, you would not believe you have done it all on your own. The satisfaction is great.7. Stay healthy.Some days you will be pretty exhausted. You get home and there is no way you are going to read a single page of the textbook. That is fine. You need to understand where your limit is. That night is probably better to have a light meal and go straight to bed. Regenerating yourself is critical to keep your brain functioning. You achieve this by eating healthy, doing exercise and have regular sleep. Do not underestimate this.8. Reward yourself.Rewarding yourself after an assessment is submitted or an exam is done, injects new fuel in the engine. It gives you a boost to keep going and look forward to the next reward. Trust me, from now on, you will never take for granted any new TV series on Netflix! This means, that when you will reward yourself with a week off from the books to watch the new show, it will be a whole new world!In conclusion, yes, studying while working full time is hard. But you are not the only one. I know tens of people doing this successfully. There is no age limit. It is amazing to sit an exam, watch around you and realize how diverse the class is. Still today after 20 exams, I am surprised every time.The morale of the storyStudying, whether towards a degree or a simple course, does not make you a successful entrepreneur. But, for sure, it gives you the foundation to jump into the trenches and get your hands dirty.If you have doubts about starting to study again, now is the right time. Today's technology offers countless tools to be successful in your studies. Money cannot buy the final reward.I know already what I will do next, and you?Ah, one more last thing. Do not hesitate to reach out if you need further details or suggestions. I would be extremely happy to help you.DisclaimerI am not paid or will receive any commission from OUA. This post is purely based on my experience with them. I sincerely hope that it will help you to take the leap of faith and to challenge yourself to improve you life.

#/r/entrepreneur #reddit

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