#HELL SHE FUCKING G O R E D HIM

[bucketsofgiggles]

shout out to Amphibia for, when one of the main villains feels regret and remorse for his actions and decides he’s done doing terrible things, A. also having him acknowledge that his past actions make him irredeemable and B. having the protagonist, who sees and hears the villain express regret and surrender, still land the finishing blow. King Shit 

[joonberriess]

s e v e n

p a i r i n g : jungkook x reader

g e n r e : baby daddy au

t a g s : sleazy!jk, vaginal sex, unprotected sex, cunnilingus, fingering, messy sex, half assed blowjob, rough sex, possessive!jk, he’s a jealous mess, he’s also like a lost puppy following you around, pervy!jk, dirty talk, light degradation, jk literally wants you all the time, oc is mean n cunty, but she’s also weak when it comes to him, me thinks he’s toxic, toxic!jk tag to be safe (for now LMAO), hyunjin gets put in his place three times LMAO, sex tapes, THIS IS NASTY Y’ALL

w o r d c o u n t : 5.5 k

s u m m a r y : “You know night after night, I’ll be fuckin’ you right,” or: “Girl hold on my baby daddy calling again.”

“Jungkook,” you sigh deeply, “I’m not kidding you can’t miss this, it’s his special day and he wants his dad there too,” You grit your teeth while digging through the pantry with your phone balanced on your shoulder, “No! I already told you what he wants to do afterwards we’re not just going to cancel those plans because you wanna show off when you feel like it. He’s six!”

You’re already irritated and Jungkook clearly wasn’t making things any better with his nonchalant attitude and condescending words/tone. “Jungkook–you’re not listening–”

“Baby I heard ya loud and clear, stop stressin’ that pretty little head of yours. Sounds like you’re about to pop a nerve or something,” Jungkook replies with that stupid laugh of his, “I mean I know a couple things that can help you relax.”

You close your eyes and count to three under your breath tilting your head back and pinching the bridge of your nose. “...Tell me to calm down one more time and see what happens Jeon Jungkook,” you go to say more but he cuts you off.

“I didn’t tell you to calm down, I said to stop stressing.”

“........” Oh this man had you mad already, and he wasn’t even here yet. You ignore his voice and shakily set down the bag of bread you had pulled from the pantry. This man was so fucking dead when he got here.

“Ow–! Baby what the hell?” Jungkook yelps as soon as he walks through the door, he’s holding his arms up to block the stuff you throw at him (and they’re not soft either). “Did I do something?” He whines.

You glare fiercely back at him, “Did you do something? Don’t act smart with me Jungkook, you know damn well what you’re doing. Stop acting stupid because you look stupid.” You hurl your son’s toy ball at him and perfectly strike his head, “Today is not the day you hear me, Jiho’s been looking forward to his recital and you’re not going to ruin it by being a deadbeat.” You seethe.

Jungkook raises his hands in surrender, “Baby all I said was to quit stressin’,” he walks over carefully in case you planned on throwing something else, “you know I’d never make my baby mad on purpose.” He wraps his arms around your waist and tugs you to his chest, “Is this a new dress? Looks sexy.” He teases as he sneaks his hand down to your ass and squeezes it through the dress.

“Don’t change the subject,” you shake his hand away and stare up at him, “and how do you keep coming in here? Nevermind that, stop coming in like you live here.” You grunted.

“I found the key under the doormat, you should really hide it somewhere else.” Jungkook grins as he tries to kiss you but he misses and ends up kissing up on the side of your face, “ “Don’t be like that babe.” He pouts.

You grumble once more and relax into his arms, “Swear to me you’re not going to mess this up for Jiho.” You grab his face and direct it towards you, “Swear it.” You stare into his eyes with a pleading look.

Jungkook nods, ��I swear.” He gently squeezes you, “I only want the best for Jiho too, he’s my son after all.” You stare at him, as if you’re trying to find any hints of deceivement but you find none in his eyes, in fact he looks sincere for once.

“Okay..” You softly reply and let his face go, “I believe you.”

He does that stupid (but charming) thing where he smiles coyly, borderline smirking, as he stares down at you with those playful eyes of his. “Now what do you say we relax a little yeah? You’re looking a little too fine for me to let it go to waste baby..” He gently runs his hands up and down your sides, slithering their way back to your ass like he had them before.

You laugh in disbelief, “You’re ridiculous, I can’t believe you.” You shake your head as Jungkook leans down to bury his nose in the side of your neck, “Fine.”

Jungkook grins triumphantly as he spins you around in the direction of the hallway where the bedroom lies. “Lead the way lil’ mama.” Jungkook murmurs in a low tone, eyes dropping down to admire your pretty ass. You take his hand and lead the way, biting back small laughs of amusement as he encircles his arms around you from behind and kisses on your neck.

You stumble into the room and let the straps of your sundress slip off your shoulders but he stops you, “No, wanna fuck you in it baby.” He whispers in your ear as he guides you on to the bed, “Damn, you look so fuckin’ fine walkin’ around like this. If only they knew how I make you mine every night baby.” He stands at the edge of the bed, hands slowly undoing his belt buckle and jeans. His Calvin Klein boxers peek out from underneath in all their glory making your mouth water a tiny bit.

“And if I said this dress wasn’t for you? I mean, you fuck me every night but do you know who comes when you’re not here?” You lick your lips with a smirk, “You have no clue what happens when you’re gone.” Jungkook’s eyes darken at that, the way he looks at you is enough to have you creaming your panties.

“Oh yeah? Like who mama? Go on and tell me,” He climbs on the bed and flips your dress up, “does he make you cum like I do? Has you shaking n creamin’ this slutty pussy all over his cock?” He yanks your panties down your legs and tosses the ruined item on to the ground below, “Let me tell you something,” he grabs your chin and forces you to look at him, “he may be here when I’m gone but you always come back for this dick baby.”

You bite back your moan from the utter filth he just spewed at you, your poor pussy’s throbbing from all this and you desperately need his tongue or something on you. “Jungkook,” you quietly groan, “if you’re gonna fuck around then let go.” You glare.

“Patience, wanna savor my baby’s sweet lil’ pussy.” He hungrily licks his lips, “You got a man starved sweetheart,” he goes down between your legs, “I’ll make sure you forget all about your..friend.” He shoots a wink at you before he disappears under your dress.

Jungkook’s hot breath fans over your poor cunt and it tickles your clit and sends a shiver down your spine in anticipation. Luckily he doesn’t disappoint and his tongue dips low between your dewy soft folds, licking upwards until he circles your clit. A long sigh slips past your lips, you slide your hands into his hair and grip the curly strands as a means to hold on, “Oh fuck..” You whisper.

Jungkook hums against your pussy and buries himself nose deep while he licks and sucks at your slicked up hole. His nose brushes past your clit, bumping it gently and causing tiny little jolts of pleasure. “Mm..” You spread your thighs wider to make more room for him. You can feel his tongue prod at your sopping hole, dipping in teasingly but not quite slipping in just yet.

He curls his hands around your thighs and groans low, you can see his hips rock up into the bed as he grinds his hard cock over the sheets. The sight sends shivers down your spine as you push your pussy up into his mouth, “Kook,” you bite your lip, “need more..”

Jungkook makes some obscene slurping noises before he pulls away, panting slightly before he dives back in, only this time he aims for your sensitive clit. He wraps his lips around the bud and suckles, moaning so the vibrations travel. A shocked moan leaves you, your eyes slip shut and you roll your hips like you’re trying to fuck your pussy into his mouth some more.

His fingers trail down to push into your sloppy cunt, a low lewd squelching noise audible in the background as he fucks his fingers in and out of you steadily. Your toes curl and you hike your legs up over his shoulders. Jungkook doesn’t take it easy on your poor cunt opting to fuck his fingers in at a fast pace. He swirls his tongue around your clit and flicks it repeatedly until he has you squirming from the rapid pleasure building.

“Kook,” you moan, “fuck–hold on,” you try to push his head away but he tightens his grip on you and moves his fingers faster at godspeed. “Jungkook,” you moaned loudly and arch your back.

He pulls away from your cunt and pants heavily, “Go on, cum for me.” He licks his lips, “Get ‘em nice and wet for me.” He smirks with hazy eyes, emerging from under your dress but keeping up that rapid pace.

Your lips form a small ‘o’ and your pussy flutters around his fingers, “Oh fuck..!” You cry out and reach for the sheets, grabbing and twisting at them as you thrash around. “Mmm..! Mm,” you throw your head back and gasp as your orgasm finally hits hard.

“There you go baby, that’s it.” He leans down to capture your lips in a smooth and slow kiss, “Did so good for me.” He purrs against your lips watching as you tiredly moaned and slumped against the bed, “C’mere mama,” he helped you sit up, “need your mouth on my cock.” He shoves his boxers down enough to let his cock spring out.

It slaps against his stomach with a lewd noise, making you bite your lip in desire. “Get it wet for me,” Jungkook strokes his cock with a low sigh as he slaps the tip against your lips repeatedly, “c’mon sweetheart.” He guides your head forward towards his cock with a hitched breath.

You part your lips and wrap them around the weeping tip hearing him curse under his breath. His hand tangles in your hair and bites down on his lip, “There you go baby, look so fuckin’ sexy with my cock in your mouth.” He guides your head back and forth, hissing quietly when you gently scrape your teeth around the shaft.

Jungkook moans low when your tongue runs over a sensitive vein along his cock. You give him a harsh suck slowly pulling off his cock with a wet pop, it slaps against your lips and you smirk up at him, “Like that?”

“Just like that.” He repeats and gently pushes you back, “Open ‘em.” He pats your thighs, “We got an hour left before we gotta go.” He murmurs, “and I don’t plan on letting you walk outta here without a fuckin’.” He’s so vulgar it literally annoys you how much it turns you on when he talks like that about you.

You bite your lip and hoist your legs around his waist, reaching down to replace his hand on his cock as you press the bulbous head against your pussy, rubbing up and down while smearing your slick around. Jungkook watches you with hooded eyes as he holds himself up over you, “Go on baby, slip me right in your little pussy.”

His cock throbs in your hand and you take pity on him, letting the tip slip right in through the mess he created of you earlier. Your lips part as you guide him inch for inch until he’s bottomed out inside your pussy, balls deep and hips pressed against yours. Jungkook moans quietly and tests the waters by pressing in deeply, he rocks his hips slowly just enjoying the feeling of your soft pussy wrapped around his cock.

“Fuck me,” you sigh out and relax, this is exactly what you were craving for, you never wanted the feeling to end.

“I am baby.” Jungkook grins and pushes up into you once more, “Pussy feels so fuckin’ snug around me, ‘s all soaked for me too, bet you don’t get this wet for anyone else.” He grinds in deeply, hips circling slowly as his cock bumps into your sensitive spots and has you seeing stars for a moment.

You let out a long whimper and shut your eyes, “Oh fuck, right there Kook,” you whisper, “fuck, fuck, fuck me please.” You whine lowly and reach down to shove your dress up higher around your hips, “Need it so bad.”

“Need what baby?” Jungkook leaves tiny kisses down the side of your neck and shoulders, “C’mon, wanna hear you say it. Let me hear that filthy mouth of yours, I know how fuckin’ nasty you can get.” He whispers in your ear, hips grinding in that one spot you oh so love.

You shudder in pleasure and moan uncontrollably, “Mm right there–fuck, oh fuck, harder baby..” You whimper out, eyes shutting and thighs trembling once again. Jungkook thankfully doesn’t stall any longer, he re-adjusts his grip by sliding his hands under your ass and gripping both cheeks before he begins plowing into you.

He drives his cock deeper, his hips slap against your ass with loud smacking noises ringing throughout the bedroom. You lay there moaning unabashedly as he fucks the ever living shit out of you in broad daylight. Jungkook moans and pants softly in your ear, whispering a bunch of utter filth that only makes your pussy squeeze his cock and weep around him.

“You like that don’t you baby. Always been such a little slut for me, ain’t that right? This pussy belongs to me?” He growls in your ear and suddenly pins you to the bed with his hand wrapped around your throat, “You think you can just run off with someone else baby? Oh not afuckin’ chance, because at the end of the day you’ll always come running back to daddy won’t you?” He snaps his hips upward punishingly, striking your g-spot over and over again.

You cry out weakly and wildly buck your hips, the question flies right past you and you almost forget he even said anything from how good it felt. Jungkook doesn’t take too kindly and smacks your cheek a couple of times to get your attention as he asks you the question all over again, “Mmm–yeah,” you breathe out all high and soft, “only yours daddy.”

Jungkook rumbles quietly in satisfaction before he lets you go and sits up on his haunches, he grabs your waist and uses it as leverage, he begins slamming himself in and out of your poor abused cunt. You almost cry from how good it feels, your moans are choked up and some come out as pitiful little whimpers.

“Daddy–” You throw your head back and brace your hand against the sheets. The force of his thrusts is enough to send you shifting up against the mattress, there’s loud creaking noises to accompany the skin slapping skin. It just sounds like filthy fucking at this point.

Jungkook bites his lip and moans under his breath as his eyes lock on your bouncing tits, he digs his fingers into your waist and grips you so tight you know you’re going to bruise. He throws his head back with a long satisfied moan, “Oh fuck,” he rolls his hips quickly, “you’re gonna fucking make me cum baby.” He whispers breathily.

You squeeze around him with purpose, “Cum,” you whine, “inside.”

Jungkook doesn’t reply, not at least verbally, he lets out a series of lewd moans and whispers of promises. He smacks his hips into yours and reaches between you two to thumb at your clit, rubbing the bud in tight fast circles. Your orgasm comes as a surprise, feeling like eternity as you sob in pleasure and plead for more.

“Fuck..!” Jungkook groans loud and long. His cock throbs and he slams three more times before pressing himself balls deep as he fills you with his cum. “Shit..” He laughs breathlessly and runs a hand through his messy hair, “That was a good one..” He mutters with a slap to your ass as he collapses next to you.

You pant softly and turn to the alarm clock on the nightstand, “Thirty minutes.” You sigh and roll out of bed, “Get up we’re leaving.” You say while wobbling to the bathroom to freshen the hell up, “I mean it Jungkook don’t you dare make us late.” You call out from the bathroom.

Jungkook hums, “Let a man rest sweetheart, you practically drained my balls.” He replies with a sigh, “Probably made another kid just now.” He smirks to himself as he closes his eyes and folds his arms behind his head.

“Seriously sometimes I wonder how old you really are.” You shake your head as you stand in the doorway observing his relaxed form, “And I wonder why I even let you back in either. You’re not useful for anything.”

He cracks one eye open at you and smirks, “Admit it, you love my cock too much to cut me off baby, you can’t deny I don’t rock your entire world. Without me who’s gonna fuck you till you’re seeing stars?” He sits up and ignores the fact that his limp cock lays out in the open coated in slick and cum. “Does my baby need another round?” He opens his arms with a mock pout.

“Get the hell out we’re going to be late you fucking asshole.” You grit your teeth and storm off to find your shoes you were planning on wearing to the recital.

“Ay-ay captain.” Jungkook chuckles.

+

“Mama, mama! Did you see me up there?” Jiho comes running over with pure excitement in his eyes as he hugs your legs and looks up at you with those little doe eyes of his that you oh so love (not so much on the father..).

“Of course baby, you did so good up there my little man is a star.” You coo back and squat down to his level, “A little birdie told me that we should go get some pizza and ice cream at the park. How does that sound to you my love?” You gently cradle his cheek and caress it lovingly.

Jiho’s eyes lighten up at the mention of all those things, but what really breaks your heart is the noise he makes when he finally sees Jungkook behind you. “Daddy you came?!” Jiho runs over to hug him tightly, “Did you see me? Did you see me?” He excitedly jumps.

Jungkook softens and leans down to pick Jiho up with ease, “Course I saw champ you killed it, hell I think you even did better than that Sunhye girl.” He smirks as Jiho giggles uncontrollably, “What’s so funny huh?” He coos tickling his son on the side teasingly.

“Daddy just said a curse word.” Jiho covers his mouth shyly and looks at you. Your heart melts and you reach over to gently squeeze his chubby little cheek.

“Did he now baby? But remember what mommy said? Mommy doesn’t want you to end up like daddy love.” You side eye Jungkook with a nasty little glare before going back to Jiho with a soft smile, “C’mon, daddy said he’s taking you out today.” You kiss his cheek.

Jiho lights up in excitement, “Really daddy?!” He throws his arms around Jungkook’s neck and kicks his legs excitedly, “I can’t wait! I’m going to show you my new car collection daddy, it’s so cool I barely got it last week when mama and I went to the store.” He rambles on and on before he pauses, “You are coming over…right?” He quietly asks.

Jungkook nods, “Of course,” he says immediately, “you know I will champ.” He softly smiles and presses a kiss to his temple, “Daddy will always come over when you want.” This seems to satiate Jiho who goes back to his cheerful little rambles. It shouldn’t hurt you but this time it does, and you hate the bitter feeling it leaves in your mouth.

.

The day passes by and night time soon falls, Jiho of course asks Jungkook to put him to bed after hours of playing together. It warms your heart to see Jiho this happy with Jungkook, you wish it stayed like that..

“Hey babe,” Jungkook passes by behind you with a sneaky ass grab as he opens the fridge, “finally put Jiho down, little guy was out like a light.” He chuckles under his breath fondly.

You smile softly, “That’s my favorite part of the day, listening to him talk about the things he did and the new stuff he learns.. I wouldn’t miss it.” You turn the sink off and dry your hands, “Are you staying the night?” You raise a brow.

Jungkook nods, “Eh, I figured why the hell not. I don’t have anything to do tomorrow anyways.” He says and pops open a beer, “Plus I get to spend the night with my babies.” He winks at you.

You roll your eyes, “Of course.. Don’t you dare make a mess in my kitchen Jungkook.” You warn and walk off to the living room intending to watch some TV before bed. Jungkook trails after you like a lost puppy and you suppress a sigh, “What is it now?”

“Is it a crime to wanna be with you sweetheart? I’m sure you’d love some company right now.” Jungkook huffs and sits next to you on the couch with his arm thrown over your shoulders, “Aw c’mon sweetheart, don’t give me that look. Not after what went down this afternoon.” He buries his face in your shoulder and kisses it gently.

You sink into his arms and shoot him a glare, “Only reason I don’t kick you out is because Jiho’s gonna want to see you in the morning. If it were up to me your ass would be on the curb.” You grumble and pick up the remote, “And stop getting so close to me your breath stinks like beer.” You push his face away.

Jungkook’s shoulders shake as he laughs (obnoxiously in your opinion), “Fine, only cause you said so.” He says and gets up to head back into the kitchen. He re-emerges empty handed and in his wife beater tank top, his sweater is ditched and tossed to the side. “Better for you?” He holds his arms out.

“Yeah.” You turn back to the TV, “Now be quiet I’m trying to watch this.” You mumble.

Jungkook silently slips onto the couch right up beside you again. He slips his arm around and tugs you to his side with a quiet grunt. You grumble quietly and turn to face him as you push him back onto the couch and climb on top of him, “This is better..” You mutter softly and lay your head on his chest.

You don’t miss the way he smiles at you and hugs you closer, “Good night.” He says, pressing a gentle kiss to your temple. He hears a faint ‘night’ and with that he lets his eyes slip shut as he falls asleep with a dumb little smile on his face.

“Idiot..” You whisper softly, surprised at how fond you sound at the moment, but he doesn’t have to know that.

+

A few days later you’re gone for work and Jungkook comes over to take care of Jiho. At first nothing too big happens, they play some games and then have breakfast before Jungkook takes Jiho out to the mall and then they come back to have lunch. Right now however Jiho was napping leaving Jungkook all by himself.

He takes one last look at Jiho before he slips outside for a needed smoke session. Jungkook always did like the view from your balcony, it gave him like a sense of peace and security whenever he sat out there smoking a cigarette. He really did feel at ease. He spends a couple minutes looking out at the sunset and city and then he checks his phone right after when he gets bored of that.

Jungkook’s in the middle of texting back Namjoon when he hears the doorbell ring. He frowns in confusion and looks back, you didn’t say anything about having anyone over or anything being delivered. He tucks the cigarette between his lips and makes his way over to the front door.

“y/n, hey! I was wondering if–” some guy standing on the other side of the door starts but quickly stops when he sees Jungkook standing in the doorway instead of y/n.

“Can I help you?” Jungkook leans against the doorway and eyes the guy up and down, “You lost or somethin’ kid?”

“Huh? Who are you? I’ve never seen you around before and y/n’s never talked about a guy before..” He trails off, eyeing Jungkook up and down too but only this time he doesn’t bother to hide his distaste for him. Jungkook’s aware of how he looks right now, and damn if he doesn’t look good.

“I’m y/n’s baby daddy, now who the fuck are you?” Jungkook snorts and takes a long drag from the cigarette, blowing the smoke in the dude’s face.

The dude looks at him with a glare, “I’m her friend and neighbor.”

“Neighbor huh, good then you don’t need to be around then. I don’t take too kindly to random ass men trying to hit on my girl like that, because we both know you see her more than a neighbor so do me a favor and turn your ass back around unless you wanna really get to know me.” Jungkook flicks the ashes at him, “Nice meeting ya.” He grins and slams the door in his face.

“Friend huh..” Jungkook chuckles.

It’s late when you finally arrive home, you make a quick stop to get the mail before heading up when you’re stopped by Hyunjin, your adorable but annoying neighbor, “Heyy, what’s up why you out so late?” You smile tiredly while sorting your mail out.

Hyunjin looks bothered as he looks off to the side, “Nothing, just needed some fresh air you know? Anyways that’s not what I’m here for, I didn’t know you were seeing someone?” He says softly and when he sees your confused face he continues, “That guy up there? The one with tattoos and shit? He’s rude as hell.”

You internally groan, what did he do now.. “Yeah? Well, I’m not seeing him–seeing him…technically..” You trail off before sighing in defeat, “He’s my baby daddy.”

“Ohh, I thought he was lying or something because I thought no way would you ever go with someone like him. Much less have a kid with him.” He shakes his head, “He’s seriously a bad influence though, he literally was smoking in the house like you know how bad that can be for Jiho?” Hyunjin scoffs and shakes his head, “The nerve of him to call himself a parent.”

“Listen kid, whatever the fuck he does is very much his and my business. I don’t need your two pennies of a fucking opinion on my baby daddy, yeah, that’s my child’s father and what about it? I must have seen something in him if I still went and fucked him and had his kid. So don’t you ever speak on him again unless you want me to call him downstairs you little shit.” You glare and storm off to the elevators leaving a shocked Hyunjin in the back.

“Fuckin’ nerve of this brat.” You mutter and get your keys out, “Seriously.”

You walk into the apartment and are immediately greeted with Jungkook sitting there with a pissed expression. “What the hell is wrong with you?” You ask as you kick your heels off, “Where’s Jiho?”

“He’s sleeping, had dinner and went to bed.” Jungkook stands up and makes his way over to you slowly, “Who the fuck was that kid that came knocking earlier?” He cups your chin and tilts your head to face him, “He the one you fucking or what?” He grits his teeth.

You stare back at him annoyed, “He’s some dumb ass college kid Jungkook, and no I’m not fucking him. As if..” You mutter the last part and walk to the bedroom, “If you’re just gonna bitch about him sleep on the couch I beg, I’m so fucking tired from work I just wanna sleep okay? Bitch at me another time.” You sigh.

Jungkook kicks the door shut behind him and comes up behind you to hug you, “Mm.. Just wanna help my lil’ mama relax is all,” he says in your ear, “I already knew you two weren’t fucking anyways, he makes it so obvious.” Jungkook smirks as he kisses your shoulder, reaching around the front to unbutton your blouse, “Still he fuckin’ pissed me off.” He growls.

“I know, trust me.” You smirk softly and turn around in his hold and wrap your arms around his neck, “You’ll help me relax won’t you?” You whisper against his lips.

“I’ll do more than that baby.” Jungkook grins back.

.

Jungkook has you spread out for him on all fours, back arched sensually and your face buried in your pillows. Sweat glistens on his forehead as he moans under his breath whilst moving his hips leisurely, not in any rush whatsoever. Your moans are muffled but the sounds your pussy makes make up for it.

“Fucking shit, you look so goddamn perfect for me all bent over with that pretty ass of yours bouncing on my cock.” Jungkook grunts as he slides his hands down to your waist to steady you.

“Jungkook,” you whimper out as you lift your head from the pillow, “need it faster.” You push back on his cock and gasp shakily when he hits something inside of you, “Oh fuck baby right there,” you whimper out, “mm, mm.”

He moans in response and lands a heavy smack on your ass, “Yeah? You like it when I hit it right there baby? ‘S got you creamin’ all over my cock right now.” He gasps softly as he speeds up and fucks into your harder.

You eyes flutter shut and you stick a hand down between your thighs to rub at your clit in tiny circles, “I love it,” you sigh out, “feels so good.” Jungkook spanks you again and it causes you to moan loud over the noises of his balls slapping against your clit and your ass bouncing off his pelvis. “Fuck..!”

Jungkook sees your phone light up from the corner of his eye and he peers over, he sees it’s that fucking kid from earlier texting you shit about how he’s sorry. Oh Jungkook’s gonna make him sorry now.. He grabs your phone and unlocks it, immediately opening up your camera and recording, “C’mon baby, put on a show for me.” He purrs out, making sure his tattooed hand is in the frame resting right over your bouncing ass.

You moan louder and lift yourself up enough to stabilize yourself before you start fucking yourself on his cock just how he likes it. “There you go, atta girl.” Jungkook lands repeated hits on your red ass cheek, licking his lips when he sees his hand print linger. “Whose pussy this belong to baby? Hm?”

“You,” a tiny whimper follows, “ ‘s your pussy baby.” You moan back as you rub your clit faster, “Fuck right there,” you push back and circle your hips on his cock like you’re trying to spell coconut. He moans loud as your pussy massages his cock just right, he nearly forgets he’s recording in the first place.

Jungkook ends the video there with a middle finger towards the end before he sends it to Hyunjin and tosses your phone aside, “C’mere.” He growls out and grabs your hips before he starts fucking into you harder and faster.

The headboard slams into the wall repeatedly, the sound of skin slapping grows louder and your moans are borderline screams now. You shudder violently and fall onto the bed face first as your pussy squirts, you lay there twitching and shaking as you come down from your orgasm slowly. Jungkook’s lips fall open in a silent moan as he watches in satisfaction.

He cums a few minutes later, pressing in deep as he groans lowly, “Damn I almost said I love you.” He breathlessly says. You reach behind to smack his arm making him laugh, “What? It’s true.” He shakes with laughter, “Aaaa you’re so cute baby.” Jungkook wipes the sweat off his brow and pulls out slowly, “Damn.” He murmurs, laying down next to you, “You okay?” He pokes your side.

You tiredly roll over and stare at him with a goofy little smile, “I almost said I love you too.” You softly reply.

Jungkook smiles, “y/n…my love, mother of my child,” he begins, “I’m sorry, but can you make me something to eat? You sucked the life out of me and now I’m starving.”

“I fucking take it back you dipshit.” You glare and roll out of bed, “.....What do you want..” You ask after shuffling around the room getting dressed in your robe.

“Ramen? Please and thank you.” Jungkook gives you that little bunny smile that made you fall in love all those years back. Maybe you’re falling all over again…

TAGLIST: @fragmentof-indifference @jungkooksseuphoria @kooliv @angelarin @jjeonjjk7 @lilliankoo @pb-n-juju @ellesalazar @saweetspoiled @laylasbunbunny @prettyprincejk @cherrysainttt @hyunjinswifeee @joongraduatewithonor @hellbornsworld @leire-mia @m1sss1mp @lissful @winkii @lifeless-firefly @exactlygreatcoffee @taestoess @ayalies @floweryjeons @softtcurse @lilspinachwrld @tearyjjeon @littleobsessedkitty @lovelovelovebts @angeljmnie @rerefundslocals @bangtans-mama @thvhoe @maddkitt @tvse @ohjeon @teteswtnr @jkslovey12 @kelsyx33 @milfpo1ice @sluttydidi @ztyur @beomgyuult @shescharlie @sweet-sourhotcoco @lalita-7 @hazzzelsdimension @p34rluv @kook-net @bonita0-0 @vmapy @dahliadaenerys

[hunterbunter3000]

OH LORD MAMA TAKE THE WHEEL THISNIS MY LAST ONE.

imagine the boys just got back from a mission and when they enter the base, they found sweetheart cooking their country food for them. The taste is giving ✨SEASONED✨, its giving ✨you want me to marry you✨, its giving ✨that type of food that added 10 years to your life span✨, ITS GIVING ✨YOU DID A VERY GOOD JOB AND IM PROUD OF YOU✨

NOOOO NEVER STOP THESE I SWEAR YOU'RE JUST FINE 😍😍🫂🫂 these give me life you have no idea miss roro💕

(@missroro ROROOO GURL IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK FOREVER😭😭 PLS FORGIVE ME I WAS SHADOWBANNED AND THEN OTHER ASKS KEPT POURING IN🧎‍♀️this is quite long, so hopefully you will take that as a sacrifice for my tardiness 🙏I hope you're doing well! I miss you LOTS 💓)

BUT UGHHH GOD

And the FACT that I already have a scenario that's kinda like this blows my mind 🤯🤯

When Sweetheart wasn't needed for this certain mission, she said "aight bet. I know yall are gonna be so damn tired and hungry so watch this WORK."

(Idk if you wanted Sweetheart to cook her home food, or cook their country meals, so imma do both 💀)

Her home-cooked food:

When Task Force 141 came back to the base they smelt that SEASONING IMMEDIATELY LIKE--

Gaz: Something just happened.

I know he's the FIRST to book it to the living room, and then he sees the PLETHORA

GRITS, SWEET YAMS, MAC AND CHEESE, CHICKEN, HAM, GREENS AND OX TAILS, CORNBREAD-- ALL THE GOOD SHIT YOU CAN THINK OOOFFF

Gaz squeals (LITERALLY SQUEALS) cause he's been wanting to taste her cooking.

(He's always asked about African-American cooking since he grew up with British cooking. Sweetheart told him the goodness and he's been hooked on it ever since)

Everyone else comes in and sees the table and they're just in shock

Like what the hell- how long did it take you to make all this?? I love you???

It felt so domestic, like coming home to a home cooked meal after getting off work and seeing your wife smile at you saying "welcome home, dear!"

Sweetheart is just beaming at them, saying "I know yall have been through hell, so have a lil' piece of heaven!" (She's so CHEESY) the mother in her comes thru, telling them to take showers and get situated first then come eat.

WHEN I TELL YOU THAT THEY B O O K E D IT TO THE MENS SHOWERS TO GET CLEAN-- GHOST PUSHED ALEX AND SOAP INTO A WALL SO HE CAN GET THERE FIRST (König and Price were already in there LOL they're witches I swear)

They were done so quickly Sweetheart had to check if some of them were actually clean

Sweetheart: Suds?

Soap, flushed: uhm, yeah?

Sweetheart, eyes squinting: Did you wash yo' ass?

Soap:

Soap: Yes...?

Sweetheart: GO GET CLEANED

Soap: BUT FOOD--

Sweetheart: G O

(Alex and Gaz low key laughing at him and Price is disgusted that Soap sometimes doesn't wash his ass)

They all finally sit down and they just enjoy the warm feeling in their chests while looking at the food. Sweetheart turns on some r&b music (is this a black 80s BET movie? MAYBE) and she walks to the edge of the table, eyes are filled with love and pride for her team. "Aight, I'm gonna keep this short and simple cause I know all yall are hungry and tired," she starts. The team sit on every word she says, as they always do. She smiles. "I'm glad you all made it back safely. Successful mission or not, I will always be proud of all of you. I love yall."

She's too good for them, man. Wtf

They all just fell in love with her more AHA

So she sits down and the chatter and clatter begins. They all moaned so much when they ate the food 💀💀

(They all went into a food coma and had the BEST SLEEP EVER)

--

(If she made everyone's food from their culture) (I put my whole ass into this wow)

When SAS and Los Vaqueros trudged through the hallway, they heard a clang and a yelping "Ow! Son of a-"

Price and Ghost look at each other before picking up the pace towards the kitchen. "Sweetheart? Are you -" Price freezes when he sees the kitchen filled with different types of food. " - Okay..."

"Oh fuck-- Hey! Yall are back already! That's wonderful." Sweetheart nervously laughs as she wipes her hands on her messy apron. The others start to come in, not expecting the different dishes on the counters. She squeals, "Nah uh! Don't come in here! Go and get cleaned now, all of you!" They stare at her for a bit until sprinting to the Men's Showers. Shouts and loud bangs from falling tact gear are heard, making Sweetheart chuckle and shake her head. Once the men came back to the kitchen, she was gone and so was the food. "In here!" She yelled. Soap made it first to the dining room and let out a big gasp. On the long, make-shift table sat a multitude of different foods and drinks each man recognized from their home country.

"Oh, mo leannan, this looks barry!" Soap exclaims.

"In English, Mactavish." Ghost mumbles, making Soap kiss his teeth. "This looks wonderful, St.! I'm- how did you--" Sweetheart shushes him, Soap still smiling ear to ear. "Don't ask questions! Just come sit down and get your plate."

They all grab a plate and utensils with rushed steps and big smiles.

- 𓆩♡𓆪 -

Price, Ghost, and Gaz sat at the end, where they all recognize the things to make Bangers and Mash. Shepherd's Pie and Fish and Chips could be found on all their plates with a side of Barm cakes. Their dishes melt in their mouths, dragon breathing at every bite since it was still hot. Ghost had a feeling in his chest that he felt extremely warm and overwhelming. He didn't think she would make something like this for him. "How're yall enjoying it?" She asks behind Price. "Umberweivable!" Gaz spouted out, a disbelief and amazed look on his face. Sweetheart laughs at him, "Hopefully, that meant unbelievable!" Gaz nods quickly with big food-filled cheeks. "Absolutely amazing, Princess." Price says after taking a swig of homemade Ginger Beer. "Haven't had Shepherd's Pie and Ginger Beer in so long. Good run down memory lane." Price smiles with soft and grateful eyes. Sweetheart snorts out a laugh and taps her cheek. Price raises an eyebrow until the embarrassment creeps in. He grabs his napkin and wipes the food that was stuck to his cheek. "I'm glad you like it, Cap! It was so hard finding an easy recipe for that damn beer." Sweetheart grumbles, looking at the kitchen with furrowed eyes and hand on Price's shoulder. He leans into her touch and sighs. "All in all, thank you." He murmurs, lifting her hand and placing a kiss on it. Sweetheart giggles, ignoring the heat coming from her hand. "You're very welcome!" She moves to Ghost, who has been quietly shoveling food in his mouth. "Hey Ghost! Are you--" Sweetheart stopped when he looked up at her. Eyes big with tears running down his flushed, stuffed cheeks. His eyes tick away from her changed face. "What...?" Simon whispers. She gives him a soft smile as one of her hands wipes off his tears. He didn't even notice the tears falling... "You enjoying the food?" She asks softly. Oh, that tone. That tone she uses only for Simon. He shivers, nodding his head slowly and then laying on her hip. She coos, wrapping her hand around his head while giving him head scratches to calm him down. You're alright, Simon. She's saying through her touch. Enjoy yourself.

Soap was practically vibrating in his chair when he saw a pitcher of Scottish Ale next to a big pot of Cullen Skink and an array of Scotch Pies with small Bacon Butties on the side. He did a double take when he saw a dish filled with Stovies and fried cut potatoes. Just how he ate it when he was younger. He lets out a disbelieved laugh as he reaches for it. "St.!" He calls out to her. She comes over with a worried look. "Wassup Suds? Everything okay?" He looks up at her with glassy eyes and a smile, nudging the Stovies. Sweetheart snickers, "I told you I would make it! I remember you tellin' me that your...màthair? Or-- mudder- damn I forgot how to say it-- but ya mom use to make this for you! So I looked up a recipe and may have added some of my extra spice to it." She explains as she whispers and laughs that last part. He can't believe that she remembers that. He told her that when he met her; telling her all the different Scottish cuisines. "I hope it tastes good..." She mumbles to herself. She cares. Soap grabs his spoon and collects some of the dish. She cares so much. Memories going through his mind when he chews it. She cares too much. "It's delicious." Soap whimpers out. Sweetheart smiles as she bends down to hug him. "I'm glad you like it."

Alejandro exclaims loudly when he takes a bite of his abundantly covered Elote. Rudy chuckles at him, taking another big ladel of Pancita and putting it in his bowl. "Hey guys, are you- WOW," Sweetheart yells. "You guys really ate almost everything! The Tamales and Flautas are gone..." Alejandro hums as he swallows. "So is the Ceviche and the Pipián." They both laugh at Sweetheart's surprised face. "Yall were hungry!!"And we still are, mama!" Alejandro snickers, taking more bites of his corn. "Mi flor, how did you make some of these dishes? And by yourself?" Rudy asks. He's so proud of her. He feels like he's back at home. "Oh, I had some help! Kinda-- some of the rookies helped me make the dishes! But then I kicked them out cause they were getting on my nerves." Sweetheart said, making the men laugh. "I knew you were a good cook. You would make a good wife someday, Sweetheart!" Alejandro shouted out as he smiled. Her shy laugh made him feel warm, but he wants his statement to come true.

König wanted to cry. He hasn't seen such a big pan of Tiroler Gröstl in a while. A basket of Kaiser Rolls is next to some Kasnocken and a pot full of Potato Gulasch. He scratches the brown hood he has on. Sweetheart made it for him so he could wear it when he's on base, since his other one was stinking up the joint. He watches Krueger take a big bite of his food and gulp down his drink that tastes like Almdudler. He's also wearing a hood that Sweetheart made for him; light blue fabric and handmade yellow stars scattered around it. It's scrunched up to his nose, his scarred lips still munching on his roll. He seems to be enjoying himself. König hasn't eaten with Krueger ever since they were kids. The impact on Krueger's actions in the past really changed everything for König and the family. But at least they're bonding in silence. "Hey, you two! Enjoying the food?" Sweetheart asks. Sweetheart. "Yes, meine kleine Göttin. It's very tasty." Krueger compliments her. She giggles, but it's cut short when Krueger grabs her arm and kisses her cheek. "Thank you for this wonderful feast, my love." He whispers in her ear with a smirk. Her mind goes blank for a moment, the heat of the kiss still searing on her brown skin. König grips his fork hard, turning his knuckles white. She sputters and then loudly laughs. "Yeah! No- no problem! I uh, König? How you uh, you enjoying the food?" He looks down at his plate, still quite full of food, yet not feeling like eating any of it anymore. König smiles with his eyes. "I am, Schatz. Thank you."

Horangi was enjoying himself to the fullest. Slurping down some Jajangmyeon with korean fried chicken and Kimchi fried rice with an egg. It reminds him so much of his mother's cooking, and when he didn't receive any Valentine's Day gifts so he would eat the noodles on Black Day. He blows on the noodles, the steam fogging up his black sunglasses. He wishes his past choices didn't bring him to this point. To be reminded of what he had, and now it's gone. He drank some of his soda, causing a big burp outta him. "You seem to be enjoying it, Horangi!" But without all his choices, he wouldn't have met her. He chuckles, covering his heavily scarred smile with his hand. Her warm hand snakes around his, gently pulling it down. She wants to see his smile. Her eyes sparkle at seeing his half-uncovered face. He's so pretty... "You like the noodles? M'sorry if I got the sauce wrong, I think I forgot some ingredients--" Horangi shakes his hand up. "No, no! It's perfect. The black bean sauce is amazing. I almost finished the whole pot." He's extremely impressed by her, but the cold feeling in his spine is wanting him to put the mask back on. Sweetheart squeals and claps, "Oh wonderful! I'm so glad you like it! By the way.." She leans down to hug his frozen form. "I hope to see your smile again. It's very pretty." She says. He is not grateful for his past choices, but he is grateful for her.

Alex and Roach enjoy their food in comfortable, happy silence. Alex hasn't had a decent cheeseburger since his leave. He dips a crinkle cut fry in ketchup, while Roach enjoys a big Maine Crab Roll. He's never tasted one before, but he always has, ever since Sweetheart gave him a postcard with the Roll on it, it's been his dream to taste one. "Yo, Alex! How's the burger?" Sweetheart asks, walking up to the both of them. Alex hums with a smile on his face. "You can't go wrong with a cheeseburger unless it's from a dirty bar." Sweetheart laughs, "Amen to that! And you're you doing, Gare Bear? Ya like the roll?" She asks sweetly. Roach can feel his face heat up from the nickname. He puts it down, finally taking breaths from horking it down non-stop, and putting two thumbs up. Her bright smile made both of them feel warm inside.

Graves sighs. His bones and joints hurt so damn bad. That mission with everyone was successful but it always costed some type of labor pain. He went to his dorm, already clean and changed into casual clothes. He could've sworn he heard laughing on the other side of the base... It didn't matter to him. All he wanted to do was to sleep off this pain. He notices a big plate covered in tin foil and a small note plus a coke-a-cola on his door mat. His eyes scan down the hall way with confused brows. Is he being pranked by one of his shadows? He better not be, he doesn't have the patience for it- Oh it's from Sweetheart. Wait- "What?" Graves mumbles, eyeing the messy note. The note reads:

Hey Graves. Congrats on the successful mission

Made you some dinner cause I'm pro proo pri PROU FUCK proud of you. That is the only time I'm gonna say that to you and it's not even in person. Doesn't matter, enjoy the food

Sweetheart ♡ (p.s. you still an asshole and NO I did NOT put laxatives in your food this time)

He huffs out a chuckle with a wobbly smile. So she does care for him. In a-- weird, hateful way. He walks in his dorm with food and drink in hand and opens the tin foil, the smell of barbecue baby back ribs, steamed carrots, buttered rolls and mashed potatoes fill his nostrils. His mouth waters immediately as he sits in his desk chair. He digs in with the utensils that Sweetheart gave him, his mind immediately going to his repeated fantasy about having a family with Sweetheart. Her, serving him a big plate of food with their baby boy on her hip. She kisses Graves's forehead and situates their son in the high chair before she starts to eat as well. A happy smile works on his face, not feeling the tears streaming down his cheeks. A happy family. "It's delicious..."

- 𓆩♡𓆪 -

After Dinner Bonus!

"Hey, no one go ANYWHERE! Yall are helping me clean all this shit up!" Sweetheart points out with a frown. Soap laughs, "Of course, hen! Why wouldn't we?"

"You did a lot for us, Princess. We'll take care of everything now. Go and take a load off." Price says close to her. Very close to her. "Nah, I can help!" Sweetheart pushed. "Your shoulder has been bothering you, hasn't it?" Ghost said, making Sweetheart flinch. "Why you gotta call me out like that, man?" Sweetheart whined. He was right, though. She's been rotating her left shoulder from time to time, playing it off every time one of the boys asked about it.

Alejandro laughs, placing his hand on her hip. His thumb doing small circles on her thin clothing. Rudy and Krueger strolled towards Sweetheart. Rudy wore a soft smile, yet his eyes told a different story. A more mischievous story. Alejandro's voice dropped an octave, making a hot jolt spike through Sweetheart's spine. "Come now, mama. I know just what to do to help you relax."

°.Reblogs are highly appreciated.! Thank you for your support everyone!!

[zeltqz]

who’s caving first? || haruchiyo sanzu.

S U M M A R Y: When Sanzu only wants to spend time with his sister to get to her best friend .

W A R N I N G S - oral sex (face sitting), haruchiyo is desperate, so is reader, senju is innocent bless her, rough sex, fem!reader, pet names, teasing, sexual tension, slight enemies to lovers —you gotta squint tho—

W O R D C O U N T - 6K YEEAH

N O T E S - im actually really proud of this. HEHEHE HOPE U GUYS LIKE <333333. Also if there’s any typos pls ignore. I’m so tired rn

T A G G I N G - @magentaviolette @gajeelstan @nalyana @luvhaitani @keisaint @imjustaweirdnerd

“…chiyo. Haruchiyo!”

Sanzu snaps his head up to his sister as she’s giving him a confused yet disappointed look. “What?”

“What?” Senju scoffs, “what do you mean what? You asked to come over for ‘bonding time’, now you’re not even paying attention!! What the hell Haruuuu--“

Ugh. She’s whining again. Haruchiyo fights the urge to tell her to shut up, instead he puts on his best poker face. “Sorry, I got a little distracted.” He continues swiping the egg wash on the crust of the pastry. 

“Hm, with what?” Senju rolls the dough between her hands, cringing at the way the flour sticks under her acrylics. It’s going to be a pain to clean that up later. 

“My…thoughts.”

He’s not lying. If his thoughts were a person called Y/N, then he’s on point. It’s hard for him to focus on literally anything from the way at this angle he’s standing at, he has perfect access to Senju’s backyard. By the pool, you’re too engrossed by your phone to notice the way he is staring at you from over the top of Senju’s head.

Ah, great. He’s distracted again, too focused on the way your feet are kicking the water from where you sit at the pool ledge. Each splash generates a ripple that flows for a couple seconds before disbanding. It’s not the water physics he’s distracted by.

It’s what you’re wearing .

Of course it wouldn’t be appropriate to be wearing something baggy and flimsy during summer—especially if you’re by a pool. But you really didn’t have to wear something so revealing. It’s killing him inside knowing that you’re off limits because you’re ‘Senju’s friend’. That stupid rule made by literally nobody but society. He’s not sure if Senju cares or not if he fucks you, but it’s still an awkward thing to ask someone. 

Sanzu looks down at the small bowl where the egg wash is—was. Now empty as he’s been mindlessly brushing the liquid onto each pastry that Senju placed onto the tray.

“Oh, is it finished?” Senju has to place her hands on the counter to lift herself up a little bit to see over the bowl from where its placed by Haruchiyo. The empty carton of eggs next to his hands also  catching her eye.  “We ran out of eggs too… Y/N!”

“What?!” You call from outside, still engrossed in your phone. The slightest faintest smile is on your face as you bite your lip reading your messages. 

Haruchiyo can feel his fingers tighten against the handle of the basting brush. His lips curling downwards into a frown, eyes narrowing when he sees you giggle into your palm.  Who the fuck are you talking to--

“I need you to go to the store for me!” Senju’s loud voice reminds Haruchiyo to keep his poker face back up, masking his true hidden intentions, the real reason why he came here.

No, he doesn’t care about bonding time with his sister, nor does he care for some goddamn pastries. What he does care about, is getting a taste of you, a glimmer of body underneath him, hear your moans as he fucks you slowly—or do you like it rough and hard? He can feel his cock twitch in his pants when you enter through the sliding doors, readjusting your bikini top straps over your shoulder. He doesn’t miss the way the strap exposed a little bit of your right boob from the movement. 

“Store? For what?” You don’t pay Haruchiyo anymind at all, and he doesn’t like it. Maybe because you know what he’s here for or maybe because you just don’t like him. The second option seems more appropriate—the first option would only suffice if you were a mind-reader or psychic (highly unlikely).

It’s safe to say that Haruchiyo isn’t the most approachable person. You initially tried to become his friend now that you were best friends with his sister, but he never showed you any mind. 

Maybe it’s because of the way you dressed? Looking back, three years ago, you weren’t the best dressed… only wearing baggy shirts and trousers to cover up because the boys at your school were complete total perverts. Senju understood, she even joined you in the baggy shirt gang club whatever stupid nickname you both called it.

It was dumb, you looked homeless at times, wearing clothes twice your size with no makeup done because who were you trying to impress? That’s probably the reason you think Haruchiyo doesn’t like you.

According to Haruchiyo’s sources—it was correct. He hated the way you dressed, because you reminded him of his god-awful sister. The two of you would wear the same hideously big clothes and it just looked awful. He hated it. He hated you. He hated his sister.

Hanging out with the Haitani’s (not willingly—it was more mandatory by Manjiro, to get along for the ‘gang’s sake’) altered his taste in women. Haruchiyo was never one to chase after a woman, like Ran’s sorry ass, or go on his knees and propose to a girl like Rindou’s desperate ass. 

But it was quite clearly obvious that the three of them lived very different lifestyles. Haruchiyo had a simple timetable to follow. Fight. Kill (sometimes). Eat. Sleep. Repeat. 

Boring lifestyle—sure. But he was satisfied. 

The Haitani’s, on the other hand. Go out. Party. Clubs. Sleep with a random chick from said club. Sleep (especially Ran). Simp (cough Rindou). Repeat. It was crazy, but they aren’t called the Rulers of Roppongi for no reason.

It was tiring at first, being out with them almost all day until Ran decided it was time for his slumber. But gradually, he started to enjoy it. He even found himself attending a club on his own once. After a lapdance from one girl and a bunch of hickies from another (at the same time), he then came to the realisation that he loves women. 

Loves them so, so much. 

So when he saw you, without that ridiculous outfit, for the first time. His dick twitched, and he knew what time it was. Sadly enough…the damage was already done. You hated his guts and you assumed he still hated yours after three years of slandering you along with his pain in the ass sister.

It was a bit hurtful, to hear those crude comments about your clothes.The only thing keeping you afloat was you knowing that you didn’t actually dress that way--only to keep all the boys staring another direction and not at your body. 

The second you graduated high school, you never wore those hideous outfits again. 

“Eggs. Like two more cartons, I think. No--no scratch that. One carton is fine.” Senju washes her hands under the sink, trying to get all the flour and batter off her hands so she can grab her wallet and give it to you.

“One box, okay…” You’re still on that stupid phone. Put the phone down. “The small box or big box?”

“No. Not box, carton! Don’t come back here with 40 eggs in a big box, we’re not a farm. And put the phone down!”

You sigh and turn off your phone. The click your phone made as the screen went black made Sanzu almost shed tear from sheer joy. He silently thanks Senju for that, because now he gets to see your pretty face not smiling down at whoever the fuck you’re texting.

“Okay! One carton. Six eggs or twelve?” You reach your hand out, grabbing Senju’s contactless card from her grasp. The second that card is in your hands, you’re already pulling your phone back out, distracted by another notification.

Sanzu can never win.

“Six. I’m almost done with these pastries. I’m gonna go pack now.” Senju hurries up the stairs, leaving the two of you alone in the kitchen. 

You can feel him staring at you, despite your eyes fixated on your phone. It’s getting a bit uncomfortable now, feeling his piercing green eyes burn holes into your skull, as if he’s waiting for you to say something. A puff of air escapes your nose as you look up at him, not noticing the way he flicks his gaze up from your chest to your eyes—trying to seem as respectable as possible.

“Do you want something from the store?” You don’t really care if he does or not--you just felt the need to say something to dispose of the awkward air in the room.

 “Nah.” He’s about to run a hand through his hair, only stopping halfway when he can feel the stickiness of the eggs practically glueing his fingers together. “I’ll just wait till you come back.”

“Yeah… speaking of. How long are you planning to stay here? Because Senju leaves for her trip in three hours.”

He shrugs from the sink. “Dunno. I’ll stay however long I want. I pay for this house.”

You make a noise of disagreement. “Actually, Omi does.”

Omi? Oh--his pain in the ass brother. “I own Takeomi, sweetheart.” 

You can’t help but cringe at the nickname. He’s getting way too comfortable for your own good. Sanzu dries his hands using a paper towel, then makes his way onto the couch. For some reason, your eyes follow him the entire time, even subconsciously walking over to the wall that divides the kitchen and the living room, leaning against it as you watch him kick his feet up onto the glass table in front of him. 

“You’re getting awfully cosy. You staying a while?”

However long it takes until I fuck you. 

“Yeah, think so.” 

There’s a thump on the couch next to him as you plop down, resting Senju’s card on the back of your phone case in your right hand. “Any reason for that?”

Sanzu literally cannot focus, cannot keep his eyes on your face—your pretty face. Not the way you’re body is on display like this. He thanks the world for a little something called peripheral vision, making side eye contact with your tits as he’s looking dead in your eye. 

Fuck, they look so pretty, even from the blurred angle. He wonders how they’d feel in his mouth. Are your nipples hard and perky? Or soft and supple? Wonders how they’d feel in his mouth, wonders how they’d feel pushed up against his cock. 

He’s never been tit-fucked before, but he can picture it now. You, on your knees in front of him as you press your tits  together, sliding them up and down his cock to milk hi cum. Fuck—would you lick the cum off your face, or would you let him cum on your tits. 

He has to calm down, he can literally feel himself getting harder as he loses himself in his thoughts. “Reason for what?”

“Reason for staying as long as you want?” You stop and shift so you’re facing him fully now, your arm resting along the back of the couch. 

This angle is even worse. Now he can see the curve of your body from top to bottom. 

“I mean,” he also shifts so he’s facing you fully, “I could say the same about you. After all, this is Senju’s house. You’re also a visitor.”

“But, I’m her friend .”

“And I’m her brother.” 

There’s something about the way he’s looking at you as he talks to you that has you wanting to rub your thighs together. But you know if you did, he’d catch on rather quickly. The last thing you’d want is for him to have something to taunt you with. 

Those three years were painful enough. 

You glare up at him, fingers tightening against your phone before standing up. “I’m going to change.”

Before he could even protest, he was forcefully silenced as he watched you walk away. The view from the back was even better than the front. “Fuck.” He whispers to himself before sinking back into the leather couch. 

He drags his eyes along his sweats, thanking his past self for choosing black sweats today instead of grey. What’s worse than having a boner in grey sweats is being caught having a boner in grey sweats. 

He’s managed to get rid of his boner by the time you’ve come down the stairs, dressing in a simple black hoodie and some matching joggers. 

He’s missing the sight of your body already. 

“Okay, I’m going now.”

The time it takes you to run to the store and back is enough time for Senju to finish packing her bags, asking her brother to help her carry it outside to her car while she takes the pastries out from the oven. Fresh and hot, she packed them in three big clear containers before shoving them inside a plastic bag. 

By the time you walk in through the door, the smell of fresh break and cookies make your mouth water. Then you frown, realising you went all that way for some eggs just for Senju to finish baking. “What the hell, Senju? What did I buy this for?”

“I’m sorry!! I read the timing wrong, I’m supposed to be there in an hour from now, and--” Sanzu places his hand on her shoulder, calming her down. 

“Relax. Go, take your pastries and have fun with your friends.”

He tries his hardest to sound as caring as possible—in actuality he just wants her out of the house now. He finds you’re much easier to break down and get under your skin when Senju isn’t around. This icy cold exterior you create only when she’s there. 

Typical. Acting big and bad in front of a friend, but crumble the moment they’ve left. 

He can’t wait to push your limits. 

You wave goodbye to Senju and lock the door behind you. Heading straight over to the kitchen, you empty the bag you got from the store, placing the eggs over by the side and taking out your packet of gummies you bought for yourself as a reward for going all that way for Senju. 

She wouldn’t mind if you bought a small treat for yourself. 

You decide to stay in the clothes you went out in, too lazy to go upstairs and change into your pyjamas when what you’re already wearing is comfortable. You manage to watch an entire season of your favourite show, munching on your gummy bears while guessing the flavour as you blindly chew them. A little game you came up with to keep yourself occupied. 

It’s not until it’s dark outside, the flickering lights outside by the pool illuminating to light up the backyard. You notice it’s been fairly quiet around the house—and that’s odd because you have a visitor. 

You haven’t seen him since Senju left, and that was-- you pick up your phone from where it was sitting next to your legs and turn it on to read the time--yeah, it’s been almost 8 hours since she left and there’s been no sign of him. 

That’s odd. 

The flicker from one of the bulbs outside catches your eye, reminding you it’s time to head upstairs. That light always creeps you out whenever you’re over here. Grabbing your blanket and your phone, you start to make your way up the stairs to Senju’s room. 

She allows you to sleep there whenever you’re staying over. Your roommates over at your house are too annoying to deal with, so you come over to hers to lay off steam. You weren’t expecting her older brother to be here though. 

Humming the theme song of the show you were watching, you reach the top of the staircase, only to bump into a hard figure. Your eyes were so fixated on the ground you didn’t notice Sanzu was actually on his way downstairs, preoccupied on his own phone. 

The reason you almost stumbled down the stairs wasn’t because of the contact, but instead the shiver tracing a slow line down the length of your spine as you stared up at him shirtless. The initial shock is what causes you to almost stumble down, but then he reaches out quickly, grabbing onto your wrist and pulling you back up to the top.

“Y’alright?” It’s a simple question that deserves a simple answer. It’s a shame your brain isn’t functioning at the moment, eyes too focused on the way the water from the shower he just took drips down his chest, tracing over the very faint lines of his abs. To be honest--you were not expecting this. He never seemed like the type to work out, a very lanky individual, but the physique he wears is almost perfect.

His body is nothing too flashy, yet you can already imagine placing your hands on his chest, running your fingers through the indents of his faint ab outline. The water drops just make it even hotter aswell—your dirty brain replaces that with the moisture coming from your tongue as you mark up his chest with kisses.

You shake your head. No, this is wrong. This is your best friend's brother, but he’s so hot— “No.”

“What?”

You snap your mouth shut, realising you spoke out loud. Sanzu looks down at you, a confused glimmer in his eye as he tightens his hold on your wrist, repeating his question. “I asked if you were alright.”

“Oh.” Yeah, m’alright. You forget to voice the words outloud, only realising you spoke in your head when Sanzu doesn’t let go of your wrist, actively seeking your answer. “Fuck--sorry I gotta go.” His grip on your wrist slips rather easily as you slide your body past his to get past the stairs, heading straight towards Senju’s room. 

Your body makes contact with the door as you lock it from behind you and slide down the door onto the floor. You fight the urge to scream into your hands. You’re a sick human being. Thinking about kissing your best friend’s brother’s chest? Do you have no shame?

It’s embarrassing. Senju’s been such a great person to you throughout your entire friendship, and to think this is how you repay her. You slide into her bed, hoping and praying that these thoughts were a one-time thing. When you wake up tomorrow, he will be ugly Sanzu again--the one that makes your blood boil just hearing his name, the one who’s so hideously attractive it makes your thighs rub together to stop that tingle from reaching your pussy.

That Sanzu .

Morning comes and you’re eager to go downstairs, hoping that your prayers have been answered. Sanzu would be back to being hideous and you could spend your week here in peace with 0 dirty thoughts. Easier said than done right?

He’s still shirtless. All morning. Afternoon too. And evening. 

This is getting ridiculous at this point. Like it is hot outside, but to be shirtless all fucking day? C’mon. He has to be doing this on purpose. He must’ve seen the way your brain short circuited last night on the staircase with just a glimpse of his chest that was even barely visible due to the darkness from the lack of lightbulbs in the hallway. 

He has to be doing this on purpose. 

You disregard everything your brain was convincing you not to do yesterday, and chose to walk around the next day in just a t-shirt and panties. Is this a little weird? Yes. Are you going to stop? No. You could feel his gaze on you—well on your ass and thighs, the t-shirt riding up your thighs with every movement you made, exposing more of your skin to him.

Sanzu couldn’t help but think you had beaten him at his own game. It’s no secret he did walk around shirtless to try and fluster you, but you managed to compose yourself. But him right now? Seeing you in just a tight shirt with straight up panties underneath—fuck they were black too. His weakness.

He can’t take it anymore. It’s only been a couple hours and he’s already giving up on the imaginary game you both created. 

“Turn around.” 

You pause your movements, hand frozen over the freezer door. Over the curve of your shoulder, you can see him standing behind you, wearing a shirt this time. It’s a shame honestly, but you’re not complaining. No more temptation.

“What do you want?” You choose to ignore him, bending down to the bottom shelf of the freezer to pull out a popsicle. It was extra hot today, you needed something cold to suck on. You know he’s staring at your shirt as it lifts up over your ass, exposing your panties on full display. You know the popsicles are in the top drawer--but that doesn’t stop you.

By the time you grab the one you wanted, you take a stand up and take a step back to close the freezer door only to walk right into his chest. You’re about to make a witty smark remark about how he needs to learn personal space, when he leans forward, his chest pressing against your back. The words die down in your throat as he practically pushes you up against the freezer. His hands slide down your body slowly, too slow for your liking. His fingers slide down to the hem of your shirt, lifting it up slightly before sliding his fingers up your stomach. You can’t breathe like this, breaths come out heavy as you try to focus on the feeling of his hands tracing onto your stomach. They leave your stomach, sliding down to your hips where he dips a finger underneath the fabric, lightly touching your skin with soft touches that have you burning up with heat. 

His fingers feel so… you can’t even describe it. It’s only a couple touches and you already feel your panties getting damper with every lingering touch he gives you. You throw your head back onto his shoulder as he begins to press kisses down your neck. From this angle, it’s a little uncomfortable having to strain your neck all the way back to give him more access--but it’s worth it. It’s so worth it. His soft lips feel 100x better than the simple touches of his fingers.

You swear the heat radiating off your body is enough to match the weather outside, you feel the packet of your popsicle start to drip as it starts melting.

You bite back a moan as his fingers slide down to your panties, about to press onto your clit before the heat suddenly disappears and it’s now you can feel the cold press of the popsicle packet digging into the skin of your fingers. Coming back to your senses, you lift your head back from his shoulder and open your eyes. You didn’t even realise you had closed them. Fucking Haruchiyo .

“Excuse me,” he says, opening the freezer door. You stand there, jaw dropped to the ground as you watch him pull out a packet of frozen peas from the drawer. 

“Are you—are you kidding me?” 

“What?” He asks almost like he’s genuinely confused as to why you’re reacting this way. 

“Why did you-- you kissed me!”

“I needed to get past the freezer.” He laughs, biting his bottom lip as he watches your whole world unravel and fall apart. It’s working. Ran’s advice is working. Get her needy and desperate for you, then she’ll come begging to you for more. He can see it in your eyes if your voice wasn’t enough evidence as is. The way it wavers ever so lightly, voice a tad bit higher than your normal pitch, the way your chest is still rising and falling faster than usual. This was so brilliant. 

“You don’t s-seduce people into moving out of the way, Sanzu.” 

The stutter? God, you were easier to break apart than he thought. “Yeah?” He steps closer to you, towering over you as he watches you try your best to keep a decent poker face on, meeting him head on with a stern expression, only to fail the moment his hands land on your hips. “Who said I was seducing you? That sounds like a you problem right there.”

Oh this fucker . You know exactly what he’s doing. He’s met his match alright, thinking he can play you, then get you to question whether or not your feelings are real or not from his actions.

“It’s not?” You alter your voice slightly, getting on your tiptoes to make your move—or better yet leave your mark. You brush your lips against his neck ever so slightly, feeling him tense up as the hot air from your nose tickled his skin. Holding the popsicle in one hand, you use the other to run your fingers through his long hair, kissing the smooth skin on his neck ever so lightly. Using the same feather light he kisses he littered all over your body.

Sanzu bit his lip, grip on your hips tightening as he felt your lips move across the sensitive skin on his neck with his ease. He almost moans when you kiss up to his jaw, tongue licking a stripe up his skin before tracing the length of his jawline with kisses. 

The moment you reached his chin, you pulled back slightly, looking him eye to eye as your lips practically brushed against his own. “Hi.” You whisper, dropping your eyes from his own down to his lips, those same ones that were on your body not that long ago.

His eyes scan over your face, lingering a little too long on your own lips. It makes you feel naked and vulnerable under his stare. It’s overwhelming, yet you find yourself leaning closer, and closer. Your lips touch, but it’s not a kiss. 

You almost have him. So close.

The moment he’s leaning forward, you’re pulling back, arms stretched out as you yawn loudly. “Fuck, I’m so tired.” 

You don’t even get the opportunity to walk away, leaving your plan ticked off with 100% completion, because his fingers are grabbing onto your chin, forcing you to face him as he presses his lips against your own.

In case you tried some slick shit again, he locks you in with a huge hand on your hip as he works his mouth against yours. You drop your popsicle, it lands on the floor with a squelch next to the frozen peas. 

The second it hit the floor, your hands were on him, grabbing onto his hair to scratch at his scalp as he kissed you feverishly. “Fuck…I’ve wanted this—f-for so long.” He pants against your lips, not even giving you a second to respond as his lips are back on your own in a heated makeout. 

Your response is faint whimpers and moans as he coaxes your mouth open with his tongue, licking and sucking his way into your greedy mouth. He has an iron grip on your hips as he lifts you up and off the ground, your legs immediately wrap around his waist for support.

You’re being placed onto the couch, back hitting the soft cushions as you scramble up on your elbows to watch as he strips his shirt off. You don’t get time to look at his chest properly this time when his hands wrap around your ankles, tugging you closer to him. You slide off your elbows, back onto your back as he’s hovering over you.

“I wanna get this done quickly--” he’s unbuckling his pants and you watch as he can’t even be bothered to pull them down all the way down and off his legs, reaching inside his back pocket to pull out a condom. “Wanna do the honours?”

You frown, puffing out your upper lip as you grab the condom from his hands, sitting upright as you pull his boxers down. His fingers find themselves on your face, cupping your cheek as he looks down at you, “Why’re poutin’?”

“Because…I expected—y’know…”

“I don’t know.”

You rub your thighs together and watch as his eyebrows raise. “Ah, I get it now.” He takes the condom from your hand, intertwining your fingers together as he pushes you back down onto your back. “You one of those, right?”

“One of what?”

“Foreplay bitches, always want to be carressed and shit, ‘m I right?”

Isn’t that the bare minimum..?? You slowly nod your head and watch him chuckle, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “You’re cute Y/N. I’ve never done foreplay before, but I’ll try it, for you. Kay?”

“Okay…”

You let him kiss you again, and you can tell he’s genuinely trying this time, his lips feel more tender as they slide against yours. The hairs on his neck stand up when he hears the deep satisfied sigh you let out, hands climbing up his face to cup at his cheeks.

He has a hand sliding down your body to your panties, hooking a finger underneath, pulling back just as fast as it snaps against your skin. You squeal into the kiss, his tongue easily sliding in the moment your mouth opens.

You eagerly suck on his tongue as his fingers slide up your shirt, resting directly atop your boob. He pulls away with a satisfied smirk on his face, “No bra?”

“It’s hot.” You feel him squeeze your boob, moulding it in his hands as he half heartedly listens to what your excuse is. 

“If it’s that hot, you shoulda jus’ walked ‘round shirtless.” He’s sliding your shirt up and over, your arms lift up to allow him to fully remove it. “Fuck—knew you had nice tits.”

“I do?”

“Um, yah.” His chuckle is breathless, seeing you splayed out beneath him…so lewd,so sexy. Just like he’d pictured. Your breasts on full display,all for him. He latches and sucks on your nipple a bit too rough from what you’re used to, but you strangely like it. Liking the way his teeth scrape against your skin, the way his flicks your nipple with his tongue at a pace that shouldn’t even be possible. 

“Oh my god—haru..” You breathe, scowling when he laughs against your nipples. The hot air from his nostrils doing nothing but adding more sensation to your sensitive buds, muscles flexing causing your breast to twitch inside his mouth. 

He continues his ministrations, sliding a hand down past your panties, pressing up against your slit. You can feel him barely digging into your folds, only a light press, can feel the slick sticking to his finger as he drags his hand away from your cunt. You watch with open eyes as he puts it in his mouth---a taste test. 

Something changes inside him. He’s sitting up, dragging you along with him roughly. He’s positioning himself to lay down and you think you can tell what’s about to go down. 

“No.”

“Don’t be a pussy.” He grabs at your hips and pulls you towards him. There’s enough of a gap between your pussy and his face, sliding through that said gap so he’s looking directly up at your clothed pussy. 

“Sit on my face.”

“N-no.”

“Why not.” You gasp when he peels your panties aside, a soft gasp leaving his mouth when he sees just how wet you are. 

“I-it’s embarrassing ..”

He looks around the room dramatically, fingers still digging through your folds carelessly. “Nobody’s here but us princess, now--” He grabs your hips, ignoring your yelp in favour of tugging you flush against his face, “Fuck—that’s it.” 

He begins to eat you out, tongue sliding up and down your folds, loud moans leaving both your mouths; yours are almost sobs, the way he’s fucking into your cunt with his tongue, lips circling around your clit. 

“Fuck—you taste, s’good—s’amazin’ for me.”

“H-haru! Ohmy--“ you’re fighting the urge to rut your hips down, not wanting to suffocate him. Hell, he’d probably like that---the sick bastard. “Yes, yes yes.” You chant over and over again, shamelessly rutting your cunt harder onto his face, to get the feeling of his nose brushing against your clit. “Shit! I’m close—Haru—I’m--“

He moans as he feels your walls clench around his tongue, briefly pulling out to stuff a finger inside, moving at the same pace his tongue was. You moan out his name as you cum on his face, riding out your orgasm as he suctions around your clit, lapping up your juices from your cunt. 

“That was so hot.” He lifts you up and over him, resting you beneath him. He grabs the condom where it dropped on the couch and rips it open, rolling it down his length. He hooks his arms under your thighs to spread you out more, enjoying the view of you spread out, cunt wet and pulsating with the need to be filled. 

“Ready?”

“Yes. Put it in please--“

You scream when he slams himself inside with a simple thrust, his cock curving in all the right directions, tears pool in your eyes as you’re unable to adjust to the stretch of his cock. 

He doesn’t give you any time to prepare yourself, time was already ticking with all that foreplay. He needs to feel you cum around his cock now. His speed is fast, calculated, each slap of his hips against yours reaching directly into your cervix. 

You’re loud. Louder than you’ve ever been before. 

“God—so hot, think I’m gonna cum soon--“ his voice is strained as he fixes his gaze on his cock as it slides in and out of you. He’s holding your legs apart by the ankle, spreading you out in the way he seeks fit. 

You’re not prepared for when he suddenly pressed downwards, folding you in two as he continues his hard thrusts. The couch is shaking as you moan his name out, over and over, the power behind each thrust is harder than the last. 

His rhythm is getting sloppier, you can feel his cock twitching inside you that you know he’s close. What’s his next move--? Will he come inside you? Or pull out and cum on your face? He seems like the type to enjoy facials. 

“S-sanzu--“ you whimper when he looks down at you, “cum on me… please.” You don’t care where at this point--as long as it’s not inside. You’re not ready for that yet.

“Fuck,” he grunts, throwing his head back and repositioning his hips to slam harder into you. You grip onto the nearest cushion, grip so tight you swear you can rip the fabric off if you tried hard enough. “That’s it—cum around my cock, sexy.”

You can’t help it, body spazzing violently as you hide your face with the cushion, muffling out your moans as you cum on his cock. 

His movements still and he’s quick to pull out of you, ripping the condom off and tossing it somewhere across the room. His hands are fast, jerking himself off before he throws his head back, moaning quite loudly as he splashes ropes of cum on your chest, aiming for your nipples but some lands on your stomach. 

“Oh my god.” He watches with wide eyes and heavy breaths as you dip your fingers onto the pool of cum on your chest, scooping some up with two fingers, stuffing them into your mouth, moaning obscenely around your fingers as you suck the residue off.

“Next time,” you take another scoop, but instead of eating it, you play with it, stretching your fingers far apart to see how far it stretches before it eventually snaps, “next time cum inside me.”

“Next time?” He leans forward to kiss you, groaning a bit at the salty taste of his cum, but it fades away with the way you’re licking into his mouth. You hum and nod into the kiss, fingers sliding behind his back to leave scratch marks that have him shuddering.

 You break the kiss to bite at his bottom lip, “Yeah, next time.”

Sanzu thought this would be a one time thing—hit and dip—as the old saying goes. But seeing you there, looking up at him so deviously—he doesn’t think he can fuck another woman that’s not you again. 

[echodoesstuff62333]

ROTTMNT Mad Dogz Headcanons

Headcanons for stupid turtles because HELL YEAH

R A P H A E L

• Probaby has OSDD-1/P-DID [savage anybody??]

• Has plushies of his bros + April

• He/She slay

• Pansexual

• Has had his tail used to trip others

• Could go onto a 5 hour ramble on kid show's characters' personalities and how deep the story actually is

• As a tot he had an absolutely horrible chewing habit[chewing through furniture, chewing his own arm, etc]

L E O N A R D O

• He has dyslexia [you can't change my mind]

• Older between him and Donnie

• Trans in some fucking way

• Leo is androsexual [y'all I'm teaching words here]

• When Leo was a tot he often mimicked his brothers to "fit in"

• Sometimes indulges in binge eating

• Leo felt separated from Donnie as a tot

D O N A T E L L O

• As a tot he was the one that suggested being twins with Leo

• Austic ass

• Has burnout but is very good at masking it

• Asexual Demiromantic demiboy king✨

• Has a wall thingy to show off all his fidget toys

• You could infact troll him with the Alt + F4

• Has a notebook to write down stuff about people. Knows the sensory needs of all the people he cares for.

M I C H E L A N G E L O

• ADHD

• Can get very aggressive when upset

• Chewing habit [whether that be a braclet or paper]

• He likes to doodle on extra markings onto himself

• Mikey is just Mikey, he doesn't do labels

• As a tot he has tried to bring stuff like food into his shell

• Knows exactly where that thing from 183 days ago you lost at 7:14 am is but can't remember where he put his pencils

[thegallaghrss]

MDNI, 18+ Only

Lip Gallagher NSFW Alphabet

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Would be really caring, making sure you're satisfied before pulling out, will wipe you down with a cloth then it's cuddles while he praises the hell out of you and gives you kisses

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

On him I feel like he likes his eyes he likes how intense they are and how he can make you weak with just one look

On you it would be your ass, he doesn't care if its big or small, round or flat, if he sees your ass he'll grab it

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Loves to Cum inside his girl, he's obsessed with the way it looks when it drips down your thighs when he pulls out, he's also the type to want you to swallow 100%

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He doesn't have many tbh, he does love when your a brat though, but he'd never tell you that

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

This dude is definitely experienced, knows exactly what he's doing and how to do it, and will make his girl feel good every time no doubt about it

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Missionary or Against the wall, he likes to see your face when having sex he loves your reactions

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

It's 50/50 if it's just a quickie then I think he can be goofy but if it's a intense long session then he's extremely serious especially if there's a power dynamic involved

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Not particularly groomed, has it trimmed but not to much, but he's always clean

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

I feel like if it's a serious long term relationship then he's really intimate and romantic but if it's just a hook up he'll just be there for the sex tbh

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Yes he does, prefers his girl but if shes busy will 100% make do with his hand, also has a special album on his phone of photos you've sent him to help the Job along

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Is definitely a Dom, spanking, handcuffs, public sex, 100% has a thing for smoking while fucking his girl, definitely likes to hear you beg

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Anywhere! If he's in the mood or his girl needs him right away then he doesn't care where he is he'll do it, doesn't even give a shit about being caught

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

You wearing a pair of heels, he loves how it makes your legs look, also you being a brat gets him going

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Anything to do with scat/blood, anything that is permanent like branding, isn't a fan of being tied up, he'll happily tie you up but won't let you do the same back

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Is obsessed with eating you out will, he's the type to wake you up the morning after rough sex by giving you head, he also loves to receive, the sight of you on your knees eager to please him turns him on so much

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Fast and rough all the way, loves intense rough sex, will 100% be slow and sensual if you told him you need it but prefers to be rough and fast

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He's definitely down for them, it happens quite often between you, especially on days when you're both working

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Doesn't give a fuck, will do what he wants when he wants and doesn't give a damn about anyone's opinion (except yours of course)

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Usually lasts about 2-3 rounds before he's spent, if he does more he'll need breaks in between to catch his breath and check on you to make sure your not to sore

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He doesn't like them, you're his and he's the only thing that should pleasure you, doesn't even let you touch yourself, if your horny you just have to ask and he'll help

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Doesn't really tease, he's very to the point, if he wants sex he'll ask for it he's to impatient to be teasing you he thinks it's a waste of time

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Not too loud, definitely grunts and growls alot and does alot of dirty talk

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He loves it when you kiss his jawline, he just finds something about it so damn attractive will make him weak at the knees everytime

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Not massive but definitely not small either I'd say a good 7 inches, his also very thick

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Extremely high, will need sex at least once a day, he's always thinking about you and is Always in the mood

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Doesn't fall asleep till you have, stays with you in his arms whispering sweet nothings until you fall asleep then he'll fall asleep after with you still cradled in his arms

[slashingdisneypasta]

Hmmmm.... Just to be fair to all the Kangaroos, do you have NSFW headcannons for Ryan and Rena? Asking for science. Yup. Just science, nothing more. Don't look at me 😂

Just to be fair, yes, of course XD

Okay first of all looks!! Ryan and Rena are inverted colours-wise to what Kingston has. So their shoulders and backs in roo form are that golden peanut-butter like colour while their chest and underbelly are the dusky dark brown colour. And in human form they're both blonde. Ryan wears a very similar hat to Kingston, while Rena wears that shade of blue on her eyelids.

Rena:

THE DEFINITION of a switch XD It completely completely depends on her partner as to which roll she takes- but either way she kills. She can be a total dominatrix, knowing exactly how much force to use to make you cum, but also bat her eyelashes and make herself cry if she thinks that'll really get you going more. She loves both rolls, she doesn't have a preference XD (though... with Henry I think she's probably prefer to be the sweet little sub XD )

She's actually not a great dancer?? Its not her strength 😅 She's up to trying (Rena's up for anything), she'll get up on stage and work a pole good enough... but she ain't special. Not star-quality at all 😅 She's enthusiastic, though!! Haha.

HIGH sexual appetite. Like, this woman is always looking to fuck. Which is (part of) why she and Kingston go through their non-monogamous phases; sometimes he just can't keep up with her XD 😅 (or more like doesn't want to. He can-- he's just not quite as constantly horny as she is)

As I've said before- Rena is a femme fatale. A really fucked up, crazy, borderline depressed femme fatale, but a femme fatale all the same. And as such, she can be d a n g e r o u s l y sexy. I feel like I mostly talk about how batshit bonkers crazy she is, but she c a n often appear to be a mysterious and alluring creature. When she wants someone, she gets them. She's got amazing focus.

She w i l l t o t a l l y flash a person if she's dared to XD (so will Kingston).

Rena masturbates. A lot. Yes, she fucks a lot but sometimes she just... eh, doesn't feel like having anyone else there. She goes into moods where she hates everyone and can't bear to have anyone around her. And she's perfectly capable to give herself a mindblowing orgasm! Sometimes she's romantic with herself, lighting candles and taking herself slowly in the bath tub- and sometimes she dissapears into a dark corner or hallways and fingers herself quick and dirty.

Call her mommy!! Call her daddy!! She's so into it. Fuck yes she's your mommy. Who's your daddy?

Ryan:

Ryan is more a lover then a fucker. He wants to treat his girl (or gentleman caller) with respect- but oh my goddddddd he will drive you crazy. You'll want him to use you so bad. And he will... but it'll really take some convincing. And he may have to be a little pissed off, too.

Yes, Ryan may prefer to treat you nicely during sex... but that doesn't mean he's not in control. He will hold you perfectly still in order to eat you out properly, hold you down to pound you, hold your wrists together above your head, etc. He wants you to feel good!!

And- hell yes- Ryan loves to go down on his partner. Genuinly loves it. For his own pleasure as well as theirs. Whether it's a pretty pussy or a nice big cock he's gonna want it in and around his mouth.

Consent king. He taps articles of clothing before taking them off to get your permission, meticulously remembers even in the HOTTEST heat of the moment where you don't like being touched, leans in and waits for you to lean in the rest of the way. Also after-care king.

Very willing to fuck his friends. Kingston? Definitely!! He loves Kingston! If his best buddy wants an orgasm he'll take care of it. Wheezy? That guy is objectively hot as hell and he doesnt mind admitting it- so no he doesn't mind fucking him, at all. Poppy? If she's into it he'll take such good care of her ^^ Show her, platonically, how she should be getting fucked.

If Ryan were in the digital age- he would be e x c e l l e n t at dick pics and videos. No awkward shots of the head, no no. He's good at this. He'll send a picture of his hard cock hugged in tight underpants, he'll send a video of him adjusting this very obvious bulge. He'll tease you to death until finally he sends you a video of him pumping it. He likes dick too- he knows what we wanna see XD 😂

BONUS: Extra Kingston

THESE ARE TOTALLY HIM XDDD

[fatalled]

wait now i need smash or pass for all level ones w kyungseok

* we're going with the perfect world idea that kyungseok would smash women. realistically, he would not. but that's not a fun game to play ):

[ W H I R L P O O L ] — Smash. Oh, he'd absolutely smash Cass if Cass ever let him, oh my god. THE THING IS ... He cares a lot about him and I think that's the only thing that has held him back for so long is that the fragile friendship they have is incredibly important to him. He would do anything for Cass.

[ L O T U S ] — Pass. Ariadne is too ... childish, in his eyes. Kyungseok loves to push buttons but Ariadne pushes his button to the extreme. She's hot and he appreciate that but Kyungseok wouldn't be able to see past the whole fact that she just absolutely dunks on him.

[ H A D E S ] — Smash. Hard to say no to the guy who looks at you like he can't imagine a life without you. Kyungseok has so many feelings for Seongyeol and all of them are tangled up and messy but he keeps coming back because ... hard to say no to the guy you can't imagine your life without. Currently smashing, actually.

[ G L I M M E R ] — Smash. She's fucking hot. He's fucking hot. In a perfect world, he'd absolutely smash Celia. They'd be absolutely insufferable though and it would only happen once. They're better as friends but like hey — why not?

[ W I N T E R ] — Pass. They don't get along as it is and Kyungseok wouldn't bother trying to get close to her to even think about it.

[ G R A N I T E ] — Pass. Kyungseok probably could not even begin to think about her in that kind of way at all even if he weren't gay. It would just never cross his mind.

[ Y M I R ] — Smash. Oh, absolutely. This guy lines up all of things that Kyungseok likes in a guy. Power and a smile that'll wipe you off your feet. He also just loves a guy who can go toe-to-toe with him and not back down. He's currently smashing.

[ L O V E S H O T ] — Smash. What? Is that not the game, smash or pass?

[ P R I N C E H A R R Y ] — Smash but it would be hate sex. Raphael annoys the hell out of him but they're both two guys with short tempers and they hate each other. The worst part is, they're both just so hot that honestly lust just tips the scales more than it should.

[ V I P E R ] — Smash. It would be a mistake they'd both try to forget about, I think. It would only happen once, one of those missions where one almost died and they have to save the other and it would tear down their defenses or something.

[ F L A R E ] — Smash. God, he'd smash her immediately. Someone who can keep up with him both in and off the field? Incredibly sexy to him. Insanely hot. The fact that they work so well together? There's sparks there even if smashing isn't on the table.

[divinctions]

✿ ━━━━ ARLO HWANG

Is that Cha Eunwoo ? oh, no, that's Arlo Hwang ! A twenty-seven year old Gaming Content Creator/Streamer who uses he/him pronouns. They currently live in Viña Del Mar, and the character they identify with most is Arataki Itto from Genshin Impact. Hopefully they find their own little paradise here in el país de los poetas!

your resident gamer boy with brainrot here only to be loud and wrong / more below

━━━━━━━━━   B  A  S  I  C  S :

full name: arlo haneul hwang ( contreras )

nickname(s): hannie ( by his mother ), lo, lolo

age: twenty - seven .

ethnicity: korean american . korean chilean ( dual citizenship ) .

gender: cis man .

pronouns: he / him .

orientation: heteroromantic / heterosexual .

occupation: youtube gamer / streamer .

language(s) spoken: english , spanish ( valpo spanish ) , learning korean .

career claims: lazerbeam fortnite content, markipliers fnaf content, and quinbobins youtube channel .

aesthetics: glow of a computer screen in a dark room, the sound of someone feverishly typing on a keyboard, and screams of delight followed by hours old monster energy and axe body spray

most replayed song: snooze - sza ( patrick star ai cover )

━━━━━━━━━   P  E  R  S  O  N  A  I  L  I  T  Y  :

absolutely unhinged . speaks without thinking . impulsive . he’s comfortable in his skin, career, and outlook on life which makes him confident beyond belief ( alot of the time unjustifiably so). he’s an idiot and he knows it. anyone can correct him and he won’t say anything, even if it’s a topic he knows like the back of his hand; he just assumes they’re right because he’s really dumb like barely graduated dumb and that’s okay. which means he’s so fucking gullible. it doesn’t even take much to gaslight him, it’s more of a match that won’t strike and he’ll still believe it. truly takes everything at face value. easily gets hyper fixated on his interests and will talk about them nonstop, you don’t have to be listening to him but he’ll yammer on and on; he swears it’s just the streamer effect but honestly he’s just like that. like i said he’s dumb as hell but the knowledge he does retain is all very irrelevant and useless on the grand scheme of things like he couldn’t tell you the right way to use a comma but if you have a few hours for to go over five nights at freddy’s lore he’s excited to share . very kind mainly because he’s not someone who will do well in a fight. his comebacks are limited to ‘ i know you are but what am i ’ and ‘ i’m like rubber, you’re like glue; what you throw at me bounces off me and sticks to you ’. he has to be nice. always has a joke on his tongue that it’s okay not to laugh at because he’ll laugh enough for everyone . over all has very good energy, he’s a go with the flow kind of person, the kind you can call on a whim to go out and he’ll be down. can make the most out of a bad situation and tries to see the positive in everything. that being said though he is dramatic af, but it’s over minor inconveniences like his package is delayed or he’s hungry and his food got delivered to the wrong address. then he’s the biggest baby around. 

━━━━━━━━━    B  A  C  K  G  R  O  U  N  D  :

arlo grew up in a extremely loving family. as the only child with a single mother who worked from him, he wasn’t necessarily spoiled, there were a lot of guidelines he was expected to follow and his mouth often got him in trouble in school, but his mother was always very gentle with him. he had undiagnosed adhd as young as four years old and had no place to expel that energy; he was no good at sports, didn’t have the athleticism for it, it only left him with injuries. but he was restless so his mother decided to introduce him to a variety of video games she was working on the concept art for..

it was a way to get him to settle down and focus on something, and also spend time as a family. he got to learn more about his mother’s job as a concept artist and what sparked her interest in video games and the kind of escape they give. arlo was very bad at them from the start, no matter how long he played or how easy the mode he set himself in, but it never turned him off from the games. he was really attracted to the idea that he could fail however many times he wanted and would still get the chance to try again and correct where he went wrong until he did get it right. or the game took pity on him and pushed him forward anyway.

his mother would go out and purchase a variety of consoles and games to have family game nights that she would use to slowly introduce her new boyfriend to. what started as a weekend thing quickly turned into a nearly every night of the week thing and something he looked forward to the most. At first, the addition of mr. contreras ( the name arlo still calls the man to this day ) bothered arlo to his core. there was a routine he’d fallen into and he loved it. he lived a comfortable life, but him showing up meant nights with babysitters and limited time in front of the tv or in front of his games to be sent to his room or go out on family outings where they’d pretend to a big happy family, but arlo always felt they were just that without mr. contreras.

despite arlo being a dramatic little shit, his step-dad was determined to get on his good side. he worked hard to prove to arlo he was someone he could trust and that he wouldn’t be going anywhere with a beautiful engagement ring to his mother. his soon to be step-dad, a costume designer, would hand make arlo’s costumes for halloween or events where he wanted to be his favorite video game character. it was a process he actually really enjoyed learning about and taking part in. by the time they packed up and moved to chile when arlo was 11 for the wedding, he was beginning to make his own costumes and tailoring his own clothes ( not always the best but he was getting there ).

as he got older his parents interest in the games dwindled as his mother turned to the beautiful mural work of valpo and his step-father focused more on the local theater scene, but they had already created a monster. he tried to connect with his classmates, joined gaming clubs, and online spaces available, but the thing is he’s not very good??? at playing games??? easily confused, has a hard time figuring out controls, and panics at any sudden music change which makes him forgot how to play the game completely because he thinks he’s about to die anyway. his game play style didn’t really mesh well with the people who are very good at games and they figured why let him play if he was only going to die or bring his team down. not to mention he was still adjusting to learning a new language, being in a new country, and missing the time when it was just him and his mother. he wasn’t use to sharing her, and it had always felt like it would be him and her against the world. it’s not that he didn’t like his step-father, arlo just couldn’t adjust to change well. once he was comfortable in a space that’s where he thrived, where he wished to stay. his step-father took that comfortability away and pushed him into something new, and he wasn’t doing so well with new.

like all us lonely, ostracized folks who wanna share a space with people who share like interests, he turned to the internet ! at first, he started uploading on youtube and streaming to get better. he was looking for tips, and hoping others would reach out to help him out. games had become a solace for him when he was growing up, and he hated feeling like he was being torn away from it because he couldn’t find anyone to connect with. what his bad gameplays actually brought him was a community of people who liked that he just enjoyed the game for what it was without worrying about being the best. they laughed when alongside him as he managed to die for the fourth time in ten minutes, they cheered when he managed to win a match by pure luck, and they felt comforted knowing there was someone out being bad at games and having fun with like most of the game players at home. he had created a space for players of any level to just have fun and not have to worry about the pretentious ridicule from others in the community.

after having that realization he completely embraced the brand he unintentionally created and the upward success. his parents are super proud of him and brag about his career all the time. of course, he’s insanely active on social media always posting but he’s especially active in his discord servers and in the comments of his posts because he really does love engaging with his community. he loves collaborating with smaller creators and pushing the notion that gaming should be fun and relaxing. and never cruel.

━━━━━━━━━   H  E  A  D  C  A  N  O  N  S  :

he absolutely ADORES music. could be the adhd but he often has to have it on in the background when he’s playing games no matter what. during his streams he’ll have a 15 minute dance party with viewers to hype himself up before playing. also enjoys learning gg dances and tiktok dances on stream. he’s actually a pretty good dancer too but you won’t catch this man in a class. closest he gets to sweating is when he plays just dance and takes it very seriously, obviously.

sza’s number one fan. if he could uproot his life to become her groupie he’d do it without hesitation.

He’s a cosplayer!!! Very serious about it to, he’s invited to hella conventions to host cosplay contests and has talks with some of the most famous cosplayers in the game. He thinks the craft is really cool and is super proud of the work he does. His current favorite cosplays to do are: Sidon from botw/totk, Childe, Itto & Zhongli from Genshin Impact, Levi Ackerman from Attack on Titan, and Tuxedo Man from Sailor Moon.

the gaming chair he has is really just for show, because he stands almost immediately whenever he’s playing games bc he panics. spends a lot of time walking in laps around his room whenever he does something more stupid than usual in game. 

he doesn’t really have “gaming rage” he finds it more funny if anything. that doesn’t mean there’s no shouting, there’s a lot of shouting, it’s just not angry and vile. It’s a lot of laughter and a lot of begging, but whenever he’s playing horror games his spanish comes out. he’s been living in chile for 16 years so the language is second nature to him he just blurts it out very passionately, very terrified. It’s very funny.

absolutely hates horror games, he has a gentle heart, but he also has fomo and a curious mind so he plays all of them that are requested. especially since his fnaf videos skyrocketed his career forward. He actually had a cameo in the fnaf movie as the security guard in the beginning of the movie, and yes his fear was very real and yes it’s one of the coolest thing he’s ever done. 

has a fortnite skin and locker bundle and it’s his pride and joy he loves it so much. Will brag about it whenever he gets a chance, so give him a CHANCEEEEEE.

does not pull at ALL. he simply does not know how, and does not know when anyone is interested in him so he really is just out here spinning like a ballerina with his steam deck in one hand and his switch in the other.

Has a pet turtle named after his queen, his icon, the goddess he preys to: urbosa from the legend of zelda games.

━━━━━━━━━    W A N T E D C O N N E C T I O N S :

A vampire by olivia rodrigo esque plot where arlo is just used for money, status, company ( dont know why youd want that BUT FDKGIJKODFUKHJIS We can plot ), but he’s very gullible so he believed that it was real and it was fine but they only ever came around when it benefited them, never wanted to talk about anything he was interested in or any problems he had was basically just so awful to him and it took him way too long to get the picture honestly UFIJDKSFUFIJSKO

FESTIVAL PARTNER. This would be someone he goes to musical festivals with, like all the festivals. It doesn’t matter where in the world it is or how last minute it is, if there’s a festival they’ll get tickets and catch the flight, rent the car, etc. It’s led them on so many great adventures and they’ve landed in some very funny situations because of it. Just an all around great time.

ROOMMATES !!!! I think its funny if they didn’t know arlo was a streamer when they agreed to move in and so are shocked when he’s not only home all the time but shouting at top volume at 4am. He’d definitely try to convince them to game with him, and try bribes. He’s always ordering food bc he cant cook so at least he’s eating good.

Influence/Celeb/Socialite frenemy. I’d like to see him in a collab contract for a clothing company, or energy drink, or something influencers are paid insane amounts to promote, but they can’t stand each other BKJFGKODUHFIJKOS Arlo is notoriously hard to work with because he doesn’t find the work fun so he pouts a lot until it gets fun and then he can manage but only for a little bit because he’d rather be doing something else so I can see them bickering a lot but at the end of the day they’ll stand up for one another if they think they’re being mistreated.

[vihrago-a]

@constellatory said on my old blog: " we can talk in the morning. for now, you need to rest."

this was bad. very bad. he wasn't supposed to be there. none of this was supposed to happen. stevie was carrying out a task that one of her higher-ups had asked her to do. a mole she needed to eliminate. it was nighttime and the shroud of the darkness concealed most of the situation in the back alley. but what she didn't expect was for her target to hear her sneak up on him. and instead of running away , he fought back. stevie vaguely remembers getting into a very intense struggle with him and getting clocked directly in the nose , blood dripping down her mouth and chin. the target then had her pinned up against the wall with both hands constricting her airway. a bruising grip. it was only then that she heard another person approach them and pry the male from her figure. easily thrown to the ground as if he weighed nothing. her eyes flickered to her savior --- you've got to be fucking kidding me.

there was two choices in this situation because it was cain who had somehow miraculously appeared. one , go through with her job and plant a bullet in the skull of her target. two , run and let him take care of the situation. she was driven. so she finished the job and didn't care that cain could certainly glass her for it in the future. he couldn't say anything at this point. his programming wouldn't let him. stevie's quick to pull her suppressed pistol from her holster and fire at the male who'd been struggling on the ground. in a moment's notice he is no longer an issue. the android didn't even need to say anything before he motioned her to come with. obviously they both needed to get the hell out of dodge before this looks really bad on them both. i'm going to owe him , aren't i? great. just damn peachy.

he took her home. but how the hell did he know where she lived? actually. that was a stupid question. he was an investigative android who's sole purpose was to solve things like this. of course he knew where she lived. anxiety and fear come rushing up her throat while she speaks.

" you weren't supposed to see that-- how did you-- " [ W E C A N T A L K I N T H E M O R N I N G. F O R N O W, Y O U N E E D T O R E S T. ]

that wasn't good. that was an announcement of silent rage --- even if he didn't express anything. all she could do was open the door to her apartment and dread every single minute that came after. in the morning , he would probably verbally kick her shit in. fantastic.

[drowninginblox]

Just watched Lupin the 3rd: The First

Gonna list my thots- spoilers btw

If for some reason you haven't seen any of the lupin movies, please do so. I watch lupin on a totally legal site that you can ask me about in the comments if you are so inclined. This is just ramblings from a fan riding the high of a good movie. Dont take me seriously.

Wanted to say this at the top: The ending dedication was so sweet. Rest in power Monkey Punch, your legacy will live in fans/simps like me- sorry in advance.

Lupin taking on the 3rd dimension is just- god its gorgeous. I watched it dubbed tho so the lip flaps were jank as hell. But overall- fucking beautiful

Is detective Zenengatta into redheads? If not- this movie supports my HC that he does.

Jigen is so fucking hot in 3d HOLY SHIT YALL. Jigen ships yall are eating GOOD

Goemon, babeygurl, I like you better in 2D. Not saying that 3D isn't your style, but you wear 2D better.

With that being said, I'm proud of him for being away from his emotional support item. BB V proud.

"Fujiko Mine" BARK!! BARK BARK BARK BARK!

RUFF RUFF RUFF !!! RUFF RUFF RUFF!! RUFF RUFF RUFF RUFF !!

BARK BARK

BARK BARK BARK!!!!

Ahem

She slays

Her outfits are giving e v e r y t h i n g

LUPIIIIIINNNNN- Slays. As always. Your giving king and I love u

Okay so, Lupin it girl standard was filled. Honestly- didn't like her. I don't usually like the token Lupin it girls anyways because they don't do shit other than yell for Lupin. Which is fine yknow. Sometimes you can't do shit. BUT GOD DAMN GURLIE. PULL THE TRIGGER PIGLETT. THROW A ROCK. PUNCH A BITCH. D O S O M E T H I N G

Also, for this bitch in particular, WE GET IT. YOUR DREAM IS YOUR PERSONALITY TRAIT.

anyways

I like her and lupin's dynamic if it means anything. They'd be great friends. Only friends tho. Lupin is married to the grind first, Fujiko second (if and when shes ready), and the bros third. Then the plot-relevant hoes.

[chaoticfvckingdisaster]

live blogging my reactions to the first new ninjago episode because the people at lego are madmen and i just woke up (yes, at noon) and suddenly the new episodes dropped so

likely spoilers and also bad spelling cause im typing fast

warnign reallllly long post

bombs, nice

wait are those the ninja or the other people from the trailer

why does that guy have a glowing sword lol

DID THAT GUY JUST GET CUT IN HALF WITH A SWORD???? moving up in the age range I see, ninjago.

im literally only 45 seconds in

goddamn i think theyre supposed to be unconsious but half of those guys must be dead or something man

damn bad lady kinda hot

hehe rainbow ninja

yep not my ninja

“the new ninja” really i never noticed

purple guy kinda sounds like a kid i really hope its Nelson ahh I want Nelson back

orange may be Skylor

I’m lowkey kinda hoping they’re all old characters and not new ones, but like maybe one new one would be cool

“look out, o r a n g e  n i n j a “ dude why did blue sound like a automated machine for a second

“remember: ninja always keep trying” THIS SOUNDS LIKE THE NINJA  ARE TRYING TO FIGHT COPYRIGHT LAWS OR SOMETHING OH MY IS THIS LIKE A COMMERCIAL OR SOMETHING oh my god these new ninja are getting on my nerves

yay the monestary!!

aw the crooked picture of jay and nya :(

ooh Jay doing the voiceover, although he sounds really sad :(

god god god I almost forgot Kirby is voicing Cole anymore :(( New guy is good though

“What?!” hell yeah cole get those posers

it’s been a year?!!!

Zane sounds to broken down 

oh no he turned off his emotion meter :((((

I like Cole’s new voice but every time he speaks I just get reminded that it’ll never be the same as Kirby

Cole just trying to pull together the team again- god I love him hes such a good leader and I can’t even go into it rn but he’s just a fantastically written character.

YES THE TEAMS GETTING BACK TOGETHER

wait- hello?? a training place with Kai’s logo outside??

IS THAT KAI’S VOICE?? no way

IT IS OMG

OHMYGODDD KAI IS A TEACHER AW THATS SO CUTE

THOSE KIDS ARE SO CUTE OMG

OMGGGG

okay hes a little harsh but thats just Kai man

he has a cutout of Kalmaar for the kids to destroy:(

you can tell he’s angry and beating himself up over Nya’s death :(

Benthomar is gone to rule, I guess that’s good but I was hoping to see him more

sjskfhsh Kai can’t handle kindergarteners, I feel that

Kai would rather fight criminals than deal with little kids I shjfhsj

ah yes Lloyd the subway worker

or i guess- window washer

“HEY BUDDY HOWS IT GOIN :D” 

Lloyd sounds so broken down also nooo my baby :((((

we knew someday lloyd would break and this is that day,

“come on, what happened to ninja nev-” “DONT, OKAY. Just dont.”

Lloyd is literally one of my highest comfort characters and we always saw him get back up, knowing someday he wouldn’t, but just seeing him so low is hard, he’s been through literally so much but the lego team never let him show that, and now they are. 

oh no Jay’s coming up I can’t do this

“what happened to your face?” “time... ravenges us all” oh so Jays gone insane again

is he at the lighthouse??? I cant tell

“why are there half full water glasses everywhere?” “...so I can talk to nya.” ok ninjago fandom, we had lots to say about Jay visiting the water and “talking” to nya last year, hOW we feeling about it now

“Nya the guys are here” i’m sOBBING

“I think the cheese slide off Jay’s cracker” it was never there but thanks Kai

They all sound older :((((

I still want more development with Kai’s grief

LLOYD

“Nya wouldn’t want us to quit. if she say us like this, she’d kick our butts and tell us to get back to work.” IM SO HAPPY AND SO SAD

SKGISFVIKWIBFO he jusT RIPPED FUCKING BEARD OFF SKOHLKDGYFVUV SO MUCH FOR US FREAKING OUT OVER THE TRAILER

YES MY BOYS ARE BACKK TOGETHER

I was gonna do more episodes but this was long enough so

[percontaion-points]

Firstlife chapter 12

Today’s review might be difficult for some; reader discretion is advised

Click to see the rest of the snark & image descriptions

Chapter 12

“Your Firstlife sets the stage for your Second.” —Troika

Full offence, but Archer literally told Clay that you will be forgiven for anything in Troika. So you should totally sign with them, go party, murder some people, etc etc… And then die. 

This book has yet to tell us exactly what the point of living a long firstlife is. Life sounds goddamned miserable. Like you’re the civilians caught up in another country’s war. 

And then it sounds like you’re going to be nothing but cannon fodder once you die. 

Maybe Ten should roll the dice and hope that there’s something better after she dies in secondlife. 

When I ask to speak with the owner, she gives me a tsk-tsk.

 “You wanting a piece of him? Don’t try to deny it. Girls just can’t seem to keep their hands off his goods and services.”

Why is this author so goddamned obsessed with sex? I’m not sure that we’ve had a single chapter where a character didn’t say something along these lines, even in passing. 

“I saw his body. And I used his severed hand to open the gate and free you.”

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but you can 100% survive without a hand. 

“How old are you? Really?”

 “I’m seventeen.” His chest puffs up with pride. “A mature seventeen.”

Why the hell is nobody in this book over 20? And the older ones are the bad guys. 

I open the door to find the boy—probably three or four—clutching a stuffed teddy bear to his chest.

[...]

“You can’t tell I’m a Shell?”

[...]

“Weren’t you listening, blondie? Or is the air in your head clogging your ears? I’m not on duty, so I’m not signing no one. All I expect from you is a hand job.”

Maybe the author thought that she was being funny and edgy with the constant sex “jokes”. But the fact that she had the angel in the body of a 3 or 4 year old is honestly so icky. 

I hope that the author got put on a watchlist for this scene. 

Get to the airport, get to the States. 

If you could run anywhere, why the fuck are you going to go to USA? 

Nah man, send me to the goddamned south of France. It’s the last place anybody would think to look for me. 

We HART You! Humans Against Realm Turmoil! 

Don’t Believe the Lies! Realms Are Simply a Way to Control You!

I want to hear more from these HART people. They’re the only ones with seemingly any ounce of logic and free thinking. 

“Hawaii,” I say, making a split-second decision. I’ll be far from LA—and my parents—but close to water. “ 

I t ’ s s e t t l e d t h e n , ” t h e p i l o t s a y s. “ G o a h e a d a n d b o a r d a n d w e ’ l l t a k e o ff.” [I don’t know why the hell it’s like that, and I am NOT fixing it]

Chapter 12 summary: Sloan and Ten go to the B&B Archer told them about, where they hand over the “coin”, and get put into a room. That night, Ten has a dream about her mentally ill auntie. About how she’d always talk about Ten in the past tense, and usually stuff like “I’m sorry you died.” When Ten was 13, her father completely cut his sister out from their lives, and refused to talk about her anymore. When she wakes up, she finds that Killian visited in the middle of the night. He’d left her two bracelets that have garroting wire in them. 

The girls eat breakfast and put on new clothes that were given to them. As they’re discussing what their next move should be, a little boy shows up at their room. It’s actually the hotel owner, a rogue Troikan angel who was put on probation after selling angelic drugs to humans. He says that he owed Archer a favour, and he’s not doing it for either of them. 

As they’re being driven to the airport, they discuss their future plans. Sloan’s backstory is that her granny wanted to force her not only into signing with Myriad, but also in marrying a man twice her age. Like Ten, she wants to make it to 18 so that she can be freed of her guardian forcing her to be tortured until she gives in. Then, she plans to torch her family’s estate. There are also signs along the highway advertising both Troika, Myriad, but also the anti-realm group, HART. 

The airport is super sketchy, but they realise they have no choice. Killian is there, and Ten wastes no time in calling him out on his shit. That he’s the reason why Clay died. Killian is like “Who cares? So another human died.” Although it’s hard to say if he doesn’t give a shit about humans in general, or specifically those who’ve signed with Troika. 

Ten goes over to the pilot, who she thinks is unsigned. He asks her where they’re going, and she says Hawaii. 

[heartfullyferal]

If Lizzy could hit reset on her life, and actively arrange her beginnings what would she change about her life?

When I told her that she couldn't stay, because it truly wasn't s a f e for Katherine to stay in one place so long, she still insists she'd have been okay living with Stefan and Damon.

Debatable, they can speak for themselves. Nobody really a s k e d for a baby, and we gotta respect that. I didn't ask for Lizzy to look like Katherine and Damon so much, and yet here we are.

Next, after Elijah picking up her carrier and w a l k i n g, she looked at her life and decided she would have crawled sooner and maybe bitten a few more ankles than she d i d. She was afraid Klaus would punt her across the house.

She would have quit ballet sooner, her toes s t i l l hurt from all those rehearsals.

And aside from a few regrettable minor experiences like tasting broccoli for the first time? Lizzy wouldn't have gone back home the summer she d i e d.

She almost changed her mind a whole week before Elijah picked her up. She had the text written out to him! She didn't want to leave the house that held her life's history in it, she didn't want to stray from Stefan and Damon, she wasn't r e a d y. The thought of seeing Klaus made her so fucking nervous.

But she wanted to prove to herself that she could still do it. And she missed her h o m e. Her family. And part of her hoped Klaus would j u s t praise her for coming b a c k.

If she stayed home she wouldn't have run into Klaus in the worst fit of h a t e at her constant need to defy him. Of all the shit between them, the understanding that he willingly sent her to Hell over a f i g h t hurts the absolute most. She could have done without knowing that her eternal life is born from blind w r a t h.

She was so delightfully human, and so precious to the parents getting to know her, and it was utterly ruined in a single afternoon.

She was supposed to ask Katherine if she'd make a good vampire. Mama was supposed to smile and say she would be the b e s t. Kiss her forehead, and tell her she can w a i t. Stefan was supposed to tell her she's got a lifetime ahead of her to think about it. Damon was supposed to tell her he would like her to stay human just o n e more day before she starts getting ideas.

But despite the journey it's thrown her on, she would n e v e r change who made her. Sure, she'd be safer being born in a different era. She'd still be beautiful if she was Stefan's, and she'd be very strong as a h y b r i d or a random Mikaelson from WHEREVER the fuck those whores have been. Side note Hope how do you cope aita or is this hybrid guy EXHAUSTING

But nobody loves s t r o n g e r than Katherine and Damon. In the worst ways, but they'll split the planet in two if it means Klaus will never touch her again.

That counts for a hell of a lot m o r e.

[meiakrp]

E N T E R I N G  C O D E  N A M E … AGENT REMY YOUR IDENITY HAS BEEN CONFIRMED. WELCOME HOME, AGENT.

Agent Remy is enhanced and has been assigned to team FINCH.

ACTION REQUIRED ;  Please follow and welcome your fellow agent.

A demon has you and your team cornered. Your medic is down and you’re running out of energy. You notice that there is a way to escape but it would mean leaving your team. What do you do? Be honest (Agent answered all three, other questions recorded below) 

RESPONSE RECORDED BELOW

jj is here because he skipped training-- again. but in his defense, he was doing something important, damn it: building a catapult. or...planning to build a catapult. he was still in the early stages, but he could picture it and the blueprint to make it so clearly in his head. all he really needed to do was gather supplies, and that's what got him into trouble. of course, for whatever reason, alistair was out there, and dragged him back to the building because of course alistair knew he was supposed to be doing something else.

now, here he sits, alone in one of the classrooms with a junior agent monitoring him. he knows what this is: detention. they don't call it that though, because they aren't cool enough to know what it's called like he is (thanks to all of the movies he stays up late watching.)

(he watches the movies because he's always bored, he claims; because there's so much he doesn't know that even fiction can teach him. maybe, deep down, part of him hopes it will help him remember something he's missing, like a trigger, like the kick in inception that makes the characters wake up from their dream. that's how it worked, wasn't it? he hasn't seen that movie in a while.)

he's been folding a scrap of paper he found on his desk into various shapes for what feels like all day, and finally the junior agent acknowledges his existence.

"juyeon, i have some questions for you," she says, voice firm.

"oh nooo, you fullnamed me," he whines sarcastically, but he sighs, and raises an eyebrow, waiting.

"A demon has you and your team cornered. Your medic is down and you’re running out of energy. You notice that there is a way to escape but it would mean leaving your team. What do you do? Be honest."

"die," jj answers simply. he can hear the junior agent exhale slowly through her nose. "straight up. let's be realistic here. our medic is what, dead? knocked out? useless. okay. we're tired. it's looking real bad. okay, wait, actually-- why am i the only one that can escape? why can't we all use it? maybe we can only go one at a time but surely we can get like, a couple people out, which would be better than not even trying, right? sure, we're probably guaranteed somebody dying no matter what, but that's just how it is. so i guess we get everyone out that we can or i just die. it's not really about loyalty or whatever either. it's just realistic."

the junior agent seems satisfied enough with that answer, and looks at a paper on her desk, reading the next question off:

"You caught a fellow agent sneaking around areas they shouldn’t be in. This agent is a long time friend of yours and they haven’t done anything suspicious before this. Jinx has always said to report something like this though. What do you do? Be honest."

well, this is an easy one. "fuck jinx, no offense," he replies. "i'm not a snitch. if it's their first infraction, guaranteed i've snuck around in more areas i shouldn't be in than they have. depends on if they're doing anything weird, i guess? but i probably wouldn't say anything. i have major doubts that jinx was the perfect agent before she was head of all of us. she definitely snuck into places she wasn't supposed to be. it's called being proactive."

the junior agent rolls her eyes, and suddenly, jj wonders if he can annoy her enough that she frees him from this hell early. or maybe she'll just lock him up in here for longer. okay, okay, maybe he should just be normal. that's annoying enough in itself.

"i have another one," she informs him.

"shoot."

"While hanging around in an area you are not authorized to be in, you overhear vital information that a higher up should hear. This would also mean admitting you were in the wrong place. What do you do? Be honest."

this time, jj actually laughs. it's a rare sound from him, but it's more because he can't believe she's asking him this question. it's too easy.

"okay, first of all, everyone knows i'm in the wrong place all the time," he begins. "second of all, it depends on the information. i don't really act without context, you know? but maybe i'd sit on it for a little while and think about it just for fun, and then i'll probably tell-- i dunno, alistair? whoever. you know, i think pretty fast, so it wouldn't really be a while. i'd just want to share my thoughts on the information too and have everything in order to be able to say it. i have a lot going on in my head, right? sometimes it's hard to put it in words, which might come as a surprise since i talk so much. but i think more, and i think, a lot of times it's pretty important. so i'd want to make sure i have that on lock first, then i'd tell someone."

he rests an elbow on the table, then rests his chin in a hand, blinking expectantly at the junior agent, who looks up from the paper at him with disdain. "that's everything," she says begrudgingly.

"am i free to go, officer?"

"fifteen more minutes."

"are you serious?"

[ace-with--a-mace]

well theres a lot to unpack here huh 😃