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tal-yadin · 2 years

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Ok let's jump into it, i did promise to write an actuall post.

it got LONG so check it out under the cut: (how did it end up like this??)

First thing first, this episode was vegas' episode. No doubt about it, no debate, and bible just ate the whole thing for breakfast. I mean it okay? i was having so much fun watching him on screen, just, every scene he's in is golden.

Now that i've said it let's go into more detail.

i’ve said before in my ep 5 post that the vegas is tailoring his persona to porsche and we see that full forsce in this episode (it helps of course that they have much more screentime together).

In fact, the entire way the minor family operates is much, Much more suited to porsche’s nature - and i might just write out a whole saparate post about the minor family vs the main family, because the power dynamics are fucking facinating - but the point is that the informal and street thug-ish vibe the minor family has got going is much more suited to porsche than the high brow splendor of the main family

So vegas is back on his bullshit, aided by the fact that kinn is stuck in the hospital and the fact that he’s been given premission to have porsche on call until his task is done. and the dude is sure leaning into it. heavily. it’s not working as well as it did in ep 5 because porsche’s situation has changed - he’s not as isolated, he and kinn have resolved (some, maybe) of their issues and he’s in much less need of someone to lean on.

it’s an ineteresting contrast between kinn and vegas actually. kinn has authority on his side. his word is law, the only person that outranks him his his dad. when faced with someone like porsche who won’t yield to that authority, kinn first resorted to force and is slowly learning to lean into personal connection. porsche is much likelier to do what kinn wants him to do if kinn asks.

vegas has no authority, at least when it comes to the main family (and the whole point is comptetion so it’s Always a comparison) so he probabely learned that lesson much earlier. if he wants someone to do something, he has to make them want to do it. being liked is a powerfull tool for someone like vegas, who has virtually no authority because of who he is. being straightforward isn’t an option so he manipulates instead.

so yeah vegas really shone in this episode, although i’m pretty sure nothing will ever top this hoe’s fucking smirk after he told porsche that kinn shot his ex. i honestly thought he was bullshitting completely, but according to next ep’s preview kinn’s ex IS assumed dead so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ who the fuck know. i’ve seen a bunch of theories but at this point this show is gonna make clowns out of us all.

next thing i wanna talk about is pete. petey. my best sunshine boy. you are officially on the freak scale. like we thought you were normal but the way you looked at vegas when all the other BGs were looking away and clutching their pearls? my boy was sporting a boner, i’m calling it now.

jokes aside, i’m really excited for this development. i’ll be straight (ha) with you here, i was not particulary invested in the vegaspete storyline from the get go. like i knew it was a thing in the novel, i knew it was supposed to be problematic, i was kinda dreading having to watch it go down.

then the show did such a good job with smoothing over the more fucked up aspects of kinn and porsche’s relationship in the first half and i figured they’d find a way to handle it that wouldn’t make me want to put my head through a window. (my guess was originally that they would scrap the romantic element of it entirely and just leave it as vegas the villain and pete the victim)

but this new aspect of pete’s character opens the door to some much more interesting options (my favorite amongst those is these two ending up in some real kinky s/m relationship), like actual relationship stuff. the main concern in this case is the whole consent problem and they’ve been doing such a good job handling it so far that i’m holding out real hope.

next i’d like to talk about korn’s scene. again papa korn is feeding kinn the compan line and again he’s doing it in a really ambigiuous way. like he keeps introducing kinn to important aspects of ruling the family (and essentially the crime world in general), but he never, ever actually tells kinn what he should do.i find it a super interesting detail to their dynamic because korn is still holding absolute power, but he’s deliberately Not wielding it against kinn.

korn Will turn kinn’s attetion to important details but he Won’t tell him how to act next and subsequently kinn get to make his own choices (even if they’re not the ones korn would have made). in ep 5, it was kinn who decided porsche’s punishment - he makes a mistake, that korn had to step in to help him fix by giving porsche the week off.

in this episode, kinn isn’t jumping through the hoops korn is presenting him with. korn tell’s him that his feeling are affecing his judgment, but kinn still goes to porsche in the minor family house, twice. it’s an important distinction and i think it’s also part of korn’s agenda. korn’s not going to live forever, kinn’s going to have to make his own choices one day without korn at his back.

Now onto the main event.

the scene of kinn and porsche on the balcony took me through the whole fucking range of human emotion, like what the fuck XD like first it’s romantic gift giving (”the gun and yourself” lukjfhgidjfksg) then it’s the lame ass dick jokes and then tenderness and touching foreheads and forehead kiss can you please let me live???

the scene where porsche checks on kinn in the hospital and kinn gets pissy about porsche being cosy with vegas was Gold ok? like the way porsche sprawls back against the couch with this huge ass grin on his face as soon as kinn gets pissed and immediately comences being a little shit about kinn’s jealousy? like kinn my man, your boy has never backed down from a challenge in his life, he is constantly and at a moments notice ready to throw hands XD nxndbdk

and now to that final scene, hang on to your butts folk this is gonna be paragraphes and paragraphes of me ranting and raving about apo and his fucking acting ok? ok

the beginning of That scene porsche is being damn near carried into the bathroom by vegas. please allow me to point out just how casual vegas is about the whole thing, like this bitch is selling the drunken shananegens angle even while he’s taking porsche’s shirt off, like that’s what i call commitment to the role.

then he goes in for the kill and porsche is Not Into It. like it’s instant discomfort and he gets a hand between them to push vegas off immediately, but vegas is smart, vegas is smooth, he’s got porsches practically sitting on the counter and he puts himself between his legs as soon as he leans in, which means porsche has got zero leverage to push back against him (his legs are off the floor and there’s no wall at his back to push against).

He is also, note, not very agressive about pushing when porsche resists him, like he’s definitely leaning in but he’s not pushing hard enough that porsche resorts to actual violence. he’s not restraining his hands and he’s not grabbing him, it’s all very subtle. which leaves porsche to try and curl away from the unwanted advances instead of reacting with violence.

[Gif by @parkjiminmochi ]

i’m dying, i’m dying this is where it starts beacause, the way porsche curls in, trying to turn away even while vegas has him boxed in? uhg it’s killing me. and then kinn comes in and at first porsche is smiling, he’s relieved and then kinn turns to yell at him and his face falls, there confution and upset and also geunine alarm because he can’t understand why kinn is mad at him.

and then kinn slaps him, it’s not hard, it’s more of a pat, but there’s enough sting to it that it’s insulting and porsche flinches.

[Gif by @roqueruiz ]

and this is the first time we see fear from porsche in this scene. and apo did such a fucking marvelous job because there’s a definite difference between the expression on his face before that slap and after it, sort of a sinking realization of what kinn is thinking at this moment - what he’s accusing him of - and his mind immediately leaps to what vegas told him about kinn’s ex, to the consequences of kinn believing he’s been betrayed, even and maybe especially by someone he loves.

in ep 6, kinn said he didn’t know porsche could be afraid of something, but the truth is, porsche gets afraid - On Screen - a few time that we’ve seen. it’s just that porsche does not react to fear the way most people do. i’ve said it earlier didn’t i? no matter what kind, porsche Does Not back down from a fight. Ever.

after that little slap? porsche pushes kinn away - kinn is agressive so porsche is agressive back. it’s what’s been giving kinn so much trouble with porsche from the get go, kinn is used to people backing down from him, porsche has never done it. not once.

he pushes back. he gets angry that kinn is accusing him, isn’t trusting him,he throw’s kinn’s ex in his face and when kinn retaliates by calling him a whore he slaps him, hard. it doesn’t matter how much it hurts and how scared he is and who’s on the other side - porsche does not back down from a fight.

(when kinn said THAT? I was HOLLERING. I paused and i screamed and my god was that slap the least that he deserves, i can’t even with that fucking man - skfduhfa’lij)

when porsche tries to storm off and kinn grabs him he struggles. he’s angry and hurt, he’s feeling vulnerable emotionally and physically - he does not want kinn to touch him. even while kinn herds him against the mirror he turns sideways, creating space for himself, leaving himself room to move and gain leverage against the mirror if he needs it (he’s gearing up for a fight, it’s what he expects).

[GIF by @liyazaki ]

and then he tries to turn the other way, he tries to push kinn’s arm off and head towards the exit and kinn closes the distance and pins him up agains the mirror.

and that’s like a fucking switch has been flicked right there.

[GIF by @liyazaki ]

look how he fucking curls in ok? look. (apo why are you doing this to me?) he tuck his arms close, like he’s covering himself. his shoulders go up and his head goes down and he’s trying to make himself as small as he can and I bet he holds his breath too right at that moment. FUCK ME OK?

you just know that his mind went to the night he got drugged - pinned against a glass surface with kinn at his back ? - fuck it you KNOW that that’s what he’s thinking about.

it’s definitely where my mind went, the lighting? the position? I damn near flashbacked to that scene, you can bet your ass that porsche definitely did. and that’s that fear i was talking about, because porsche is afraid. (has got a damn good reason to be afraid because this has happened before)

and you know what? kinn thinks about it too. he does. he sees porsche curled up like this and he knows. he apologizes. he takes a step back. and even though he’s still boxing porsche in, he’s Not touching him anymore. he’s giving him space. he’s giving him choice.

in the end it’s porsche that turns around to face kinn, he let’s kinn touch him, let’s him kiss him and when porsche pushes kinn away he barely has to put any pressure behind it at all and i think it’s a lovely, lovely contrast to vegas earlier who wasn’t using force exactly, but definitely didn’t back away when porsche was trying to get him to.

you guys know what happens next and i won’t talk about it because i could barely stay sane watching it so i’ll just say this: HOT DAMN

p.s. porchay was the absolute cutest this episode and kim going snooping and finding his wik shrine was actual comedy gold.

also where was my boy tankhun? where was he? GIVE HIM TO ME

#kinnporsche #kp ep 7 #holy shit this got long #this motherfucking show ok?

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monster42069 · 2 years

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I am a girlie just for you,to everyone else i. Just some guy, but here I am reporti g for girlie duty. <3 your writing is logical and it follows very well. I tried reading some philosophy the other day, and boy those people speak in hyroglyphs. The amount of """"common sense assumtive premise"""" is insane. Anyways, your writing follows from premise to premisse.

Also, the last set of photos you posted, man you know how to pose. They were very fashionable and had a palpable mood.

“Girlies” was gender neutral in my post <3 Just some guys can be girlies under the correct circumstances like now <3 🫡 Thank you for reporting in. & depending on which book you were reading,…..that means so much genuinely. Thank you.

I say this with love because my best friend has a hyperfixation in philosophy/I don’t dislike it, but you’re a real trooper for deciding on a philosophy book if it’s not a huge interest to you. I have some that I haven’t finished because it feels like they’re stroking their dicks and beards simultaneously while coming up with sentences. They love to go in circles or say things to say things with no discernible meaning sometimes, huh? It can be bad enough with my certified high school drop out moments that I’ll google the meaning of whatever paragraph I read or ask my friend, and the answer I get is “I’m not sure entirely,…..[eleven paragraphs]”. I respect it, though. I can’t be annoyed. I also love to say shit for the fuck and fun of it and pretend that it has meaning then backtrack on it’s meaning having any meaning when someone points out it’s horseshit and make it sound either pompous or poetic unnecessarily(or is it necessary?🧠👁).

I’m glad my selfies were palpable. I hope the photos gave off the same feeling as lying on cool stone or something. ♥️ Or like hitting your hip really hard on the edge of a counter while walking and realizing that the pain is also somewhat arousing.

#…

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autumnaurora · 2 years

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little reminder that im going to be doing artfight as team wither! you can find me as autumnAurora nd ill be mostly focusing on revenges (including friendly fire ones) but ill try and attack ppl if i can get the confidence! im sticking to osc/ homestuck/ random humans mostly, but i may end up drawing an animal or furry if i can figure out how. if i draw your character ill ask for premission to post here and such and so forth. thats all!

#autumn's ravings #art fight team wither #art fight 2022 #art fight #artfight #artfight 2022 #team wither

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gaywatermelonbread · 2 years

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I may or may not have forced some alters to draw tonight. Also, they’ll probably ask to post some art here and there if they want. They also give premission to ask them questions if needed. In order from left to right: Tank(Ultimis), Nik(Primis), Edward(Primis),Al (Albert “Weseal”), Tak(Primis), Takeo Masaki(Ultimis), Richtofen(Ultimis), Nikolai(Ultimis), Dempsey(Primis), and me. - Widows Arrow System

#me and the alters #we drawing #system stuff #art #system collab art

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tariah23 · 2 years

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It took me like an hour to find this one piece of fanart that caught my eye uhh. I really do wish that reposters actually sourced shit if they’re just gonna repost other people’s work without their permission anyway.

#99% of the time when you see a repost #especially when it’s posted here #it’s stole without premission even if the post says that they asked for premission #rambling #so annoying #the posts that have a link that takes you back to the actual artist are still meh since most of these ppl have ‘don’t repost-‘ in #their bio’s/ somewhere on their media but it’s like what can you do #at least those post’s are sourced tho but meh #I just so happened to find the art on pixiv by clicking on a log that drew me in and was like ‘OH!??’#I wasn’t expecting it to be in that random ass log lmfao #it was like a needle in a haystack Foreal #I searched on twitter and had no luck but I did find some other source from some art that I was also looking for too so yeah #but in all seriousness #it shouldn’t be this difficult to find art like… reposters are shit

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anne-white-star · 3 years

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A birthday present for Anne

Paring: third doctor X Anne white star (oc)

Notes : this story is for my oc her birthday.... her birthday is on the 22th of april (Its my real birthday) I just got the idea about two months ago. The art that i made for this story is my own please do not repost the story or art without my premission! thank you 😊

Also ignore any spelling mistakes i tried my best to make this. Plus i know that my birthday is still far away but i want it to post now 😊

Words : 957

Anne woke up in her and the doctors shared bed but the doctor wasn't there anymore he probably was in his lab tinkering away like usual.

'I can't believe it has been an other year already' she said while sitting up in bed

'Oh wel Its time to get dressed and eat"

After Anne got dressed and had some breakfast she went to the doctor his lab

"Good morning doctor" she huged him

"Good morning my dear did you sleep wel? "

"Oh yes i did..... do you know what day it is today?

" a Thursday"

"Yes but what ells? "

"The 22th of april"

"Yes But???" She looked at him a little sad

"Its your birthday, did you really think i would forget?" He smiled at her softly

"I don't know its posible " Anne smiled back

"I have a suprise for you" the doctor grabed her hand softly and tugged her after him in the TARDIS

"Are we going somewhere?"

The doctor noded " Yes we are but you might want to change in something els"

"What time period? "

"Early 1900s just something easy"

"Alright i'll be back in a few minuts" so Anne went away to change

"Hmm lets see ah" she grabed a long blue skirt and a white blouse with lace and puffy sleeves, she Also pinned her hair up. about 30 minuts later she was done, the TARDIS had landed And the doctor was waiting for her.

"so where are we?"

"Paris france 7th of februari 1901 to be exact" he said while stepping out and locking the door

"Are we going to meet someone?"

"Yes in fact its one of the people you wanted to meet"

"Don't tell me its Jean-Philippe Worth"

"What if i told you we are"

"Are you serious?"

"Yes"

"I can't wait to meet him"

"Here we are" they stood infront of a big building, both of them walked trough the door inside

"Good day how can i help you?"

"We are looking For Jean-Philippe Worth"

"That would be me" said the man

"Im the doctor and this is my wife Anne " the doctor shook his hand

"Ah its lovely to meet you both please come further" they all sat down

"Now do tell me what can i do for you?"

"I want a new ball gown for my wife its her birthday soon and i want het to get something Nice"

"Of course, mademoiselle Anne do tell what do you have in mind for your dress?"

"Well i made a sketch for the design if you don't mind that"

"Of course not its verry helpfull"

"Alright so i was thinking i want the dress to be made from lilac silk light pink tulle frill purple flowers and also bow knots added please, i hope its not to mutch to ask"

"Its completly fine we know what you want but we need to Take your size so that we can start making the dress, please follow me" he brought her to a room "this is helen she will take your size"

"Should i help you undressing?"

"Its fine helen i can do it myself"

"As you wish"

"Tell me whats it like to work for a famous dress maker?"

After helen was done she wrote down the info and Anne put back her clothes on , Anne searched out the fabrics she wanted to be used

"How long wil it take for my dress to be made Sir?"

"About a month"

"Alright thank you thill next time" Both of the doctor and Anne went back to the TARDIS "so what Now?"

"Wel we have a time machine" he grind

Anne grined back at him "lets go then"

"As you wish madam" the doctor once again set the TARDIS in flight only going a month forward "so there We are a perfect landing"

"You said the same thing to jo when we went to paladon wait for a few seconds" when nothing happend "alright indeed a perfect landing"

"Wel of course" he laught, They stept out again and went back to the big house

"Ah doctor mademoiselle Anne welcome back we got your dress ready"

"How wonderfull can i try it out?"

"Yes of course this way madam"

Anne went to the dressing room and took her dress of and put the new one on "ready?"

"Sure whenever you are dear"

She walked out "What do you think" she did a twirl

"You look wonderfull" he kissed her

"But why did i get to comission this dress?"

"Im going to take you to a ball for your birthday"

*gasp* "realy? Oh how wonderfull thank you thank you so mutch" Anne hugged him

The doctor hugged back "Its te least i can do" The doctor paid for the dress and both of them left

That same night The doctor and Anne dressed up, the doctor dressed up in a royal suit with a blue shash and medals Anne put her hair up And took a tiara out her cabinet and a long pearl necklace as wel.

The TARDIS had landed at Buckingham palace in 1902 for a royal ball (Its not documenten its just made up ball) both of them walked trough the door up to the stairs to the ball room, there were a lot of people some whent quite at the sight of her. She looked absolutly wonderfull. Music had started and the people started dancing

"May i have this dance madam" the doctor bowed to her

"Wel of course kind sir"

"Happy birthday Anne "

"Thank you doctor this is the best birthday i ever had" she kissed him on the cheek. And both of them dances the night away.

the end

#anne white star #oc #doctor who #classic doctor who #classic doctor who x reader #third doctor x reader #third doctor x anne white star #my art #third doctor #jon pertwee

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popculturebuffet · 3 years

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Battle of the Episodes: Celebrity Deathmatch: Rockstarmageddon Vs When Animals Attack

Hello all you happy people! And welcome to a minty fresh new segment on the blog cooked up by longtime fan and friend of the blog weirdkev27, named by me: BATTLE OF THE EPISODES! In this new segment I take two similar episodes from a show or franchise and put them up against one another and see which ones better. He pitched the idea to me for something he could do, he had two patreon reviews free so I suggested why not do it in April and here we are!

Before I begin I will admit I’d forgotten PieGuyRulez had done a similar idea with his podcast ReCast, which I’d never seen and only vaugely heard of. However I feel what i’m doing here is still diffrent enough to keep doing, I have nothing but respect for the guy, and I promise to not do any topics he’s done. If you have any suggestions for this new segment, i’d love to hear them. I already have another one in mind for when I have a free moment on the schedule that I simply didn’t get around to next month.

But for our innugural contest, Kev being the one who pitched it picked the show and it’s a show i’m only passingly familiar with as I did see bits of it growing up: Celebrity Deathmatch. Celebrity Death Match was a late 90′s and early 2000′s tv show on MTV with a revivial on MTV2. It was born both out of a short done for MTV’s Cartoon Sushi, their equilvent of Oh Yeah Cartoons! and What a Cartoon, pitting Charles Manson against Marilon Manson, and that short was popular enough to lead to a special after the superbowl. Said special ended up being the highest rated progam MTV had broadcast at the time, so naturally it got a four season series.

The premise is exactly what it says: two celebrties battle it to the death in goofy claymation fights, one shall stand, one shall fall. Meanwhile our hosts Johnny and Nick banter and set up the fights, talk to interviewers etc. It’s essentially a combination of wrestling and celebrity mockery, and unsuprisingly given MTV’s teen audience who loved pop culture and a bit of the ultra violence it was a massive hit.

The show later got a revivial a few years after it ended on MTV2, which fans often derided and which I saw more of as I was watching MTV2 at the time... look i’m not proud of the fact i watched “Where My Dogs at?” and i’m even less proud I watched “The Adventures of Chico and Guapo”. But with shows like that you can imagine how high quality the reboot was and how much fans flocked to it. Me I never took to either incarnation. I don’t HATE the show and do appricate it’s gorgeous claymation and copious use of Stone Cold Steve Austin. I love that beer drinking, hell raising, boss humliationg hellion, it’s just the combination of modern celebrity mockery, something that rarely ages well unless the joke is just funny on it’s own, and ultra violence never appealed to me as I was a pretty squeamish kid and teen.. i’ve grown out of that, but I just had no real desire to go back. It’s not a bad show but it’s not really one for me, but I get why i’ts well loved and popular.

But being a death match fan, and given the similar premisses, Kev picked this to be our inagural contest. Pitting the original against the reivvial. For this he went with two death match time machine episodes: the original’s finale rockstarmageddon and the revivial’s when animals attack. Each episode has it’s own unique theme within the general theme of a dead person versus their successor... and a very much alive person one or both of the hosts thought was dead versus their succesor as a joke: the first is about rockstars and their supposed imitators, the second is about putting two animal themed people against one another.

Each Battle of the Episodes will have diffrent comparisons as every show or franchise is different, comics are also open for this by the by. So for this one i’ll be comparing time machine use, the person explaning the machine, individual episode theme, the joke about one of the “dead” combatants turning out ot be alive, and each of the three matches. How many will also very, either 5 or 7 depending on how many talking points i have. So with that in mind LET’S GET READY TO RUMBLE under the cut and see which episode walks away a champion and which episode walks away a bloody pile of clay on the floor.

Doing the matches first as a lot of this stuff overlaps with the later bits.

Round 1: Lenny Kravitz Vs Jimmy Hendrix VS Horatio Sanz Vs Chris Farley Whelp this was a bad start to BOTH episodes as these matches are the worst of each episode and all 6 matches period. So it’s less which is better as both are a black hole of comedy.. and more which one sucks slightly less.

The Jimmy Hendrix vs Lenny Kravitz bout is just.. a black hole of comedy, It’s VERY clear the writers hated Kravitz but to me in 2020.. it just hasn’t aged well. I just don’t CARE about Lenny Kravitz. He had maybe one good song, are you gonna go my way, and that’s it. He was not good.. but he was an easy target for the time and an easily forgotten one now. It’s not smart, clever or even cathartic to watch him die. He’s also nowhere similar enough to Hendrix for the comparison to work: for one he had a vastly diffrent look most of the times and for another at most both played guitars and were not white. That’s it. It just dosen’t work.

The finisher here is just also... one of the objectively worst grossout bits i’ve seen in animation and i’m almost 30. That’s a LOTTTT of stupid gross gags that aren’t funny. The two vomit into each others mouths. Yes really. Not only is this really disprectful to hendrix death, as ODing on drugs is not something I really find funny nor the show makes funny, but it’s just.. horrifying to think about and gross and makes me want to , ironically enough, vomit thinking about. it’s just deeply unpleasant easily the worst thing i’ve encountered in my time reviewing so far, and it’s going to be a hard bar to clear. This match sucked and it left a bad taste in my mouth.

Now as for the Horatio Sanz vs Chris Farley Match...

I honestly have never seen Horatio Sanz that i’m aware of and unlike Kravitz who at least is mildly memorable if not a very good musician, Sanz has just been.. forgotten. I don’t know anything about him and once again it feels like the show punching down, picking an easy target versus a legend.

And speaking of easy targets the entire segment is just fat jokes. Just a ton of fat jokes. No really, it’s a battle of “Hog vs hog”, chris eats a lot and hte main joke is Chris Farley can’t stay alive long enough to fight. That being said while I find the joke in VERY poor taste, as Farley died of a heart attack and was a really good person and having his death be a punch line just bothers me.... I’ll admit it’s at least clever to have one of the death match time machine contestants come back again, and again, and again. It’s not Funny, it’s horrific.. but I can at least say they put in some effort ofr that one gag and given the horrifying lack of effort for the other match this one BARELY gets the W Winner: When Animals Attack:

Round 2: Shaggy vs Bob Marley VS Christan Bale vs Adam West

This one’s a no contest... seriously the gulf between jokes is wide and deep.

The Shaggy Vs Marley bout is the best of Rockstarmageddon. It’s funny, the target actually deserves being made fun of as Shaggy was a talent vacum and is memorably bad in comparison to Kravitz, so I still like seeing him get roasted, and they find a lot of funny jokes to do with Bob Marley. I only have a passing familiarity with the guy and while they do the obvious weed joke, they also have him ask for a tiny hammer or a small axe, beat shaggy with his dreads and after using a ring post to kill him, MAKING HIS REMAINS INTO A BONG (hilariously called a “legal novelty smoking device by the commentators). This match shows me why the show was popular: not every match was GOOD.. but the ones that were were creative and a joy to watch. While I sitll feel it’s mildly punching down, it’s funny enough I don’t care.

Bale Vs West just sucks both by comparison and just in general; The IDEA of having the current Batman at the time and the 60′s one duke it out is great.. but it’s very clear they didn’t like Batman begins nor have any actual christian bale jokes. While this was pre terminator rant and the much more iconic dark knight, if they didn’t have any good jokes , why do this. They just have nothing and are insulting a legitimately good movie instead of making anything funny and making cracks about everyone thinking Adam West is dead. More on that in a bit, but it’s just really not funny and really wasted my time... though West turning him into a batsignal of the cross was clever i’ll admit.

Winner: Rockstarmageddon

Round 3: Dave Matthews vs Keith Richards VS Jamie Fox vs Ray Charles

Another mistmatch.. but this time in the opposite direction.

Dave Matthews Vs Keith Richards sucks. While there are some good gags up top, we’ll get to that in it’s own section, the match itself just isn’t funny and I really don’t get comparing the stones to dave matthews band. the two bands aren’t remotely similar. The most clever it gets is Dave injecting Richards with his blood, which mellows him out but also revitalizes Richards. There’s a few good jabs at richards but otherwise just nothing of susbtance and like Kravitz Dave Matthews Band has been largely forgotten and unlike Kravitz or Shaggy, just doesn’t seem like as valid a target.

Fox vs Charles on the other hand was a great misdirect, changing his opponent and “punking” fox, forcing him to go from someone he was ready to throw down with to someone he rejects. There are way too many mr mcgoo style I’M BLINDDDDD gags, but Fox is a much more deserving target, and they had far more clever gags, with charles pulling out a cat o n grammys, and using a piano to finish Jamie. It’s nothing GREAT... but at least it’s actually funny and actually picked a good target for the time, if not one that has aged well.

Winner: When Animals Attack. 1 to 2

Round 4: Who Used the Time Machine Better?

Narrowly .. rockstarmageddon. While it had the same justification for it, the original taking on an upstart attempted replacement, the keith richards gag we’ll get to in a second is better than the farley gag for not being grossly insensitive and unfunny. But neither really use it well; Rockstarmageddon just uses it to mock artists they like and Animals uses it because the first one did. Neither really had a clever idea for it other than “get it this person sucks compared to that one.

Winner: Rockstarmageddon. 2 to 2

Episode Theme:

Similar to the time machine, this one comes down to which one had the better indvidual theme... and i’d have to say it’s Rockstarmageddon. It used the theme POORLY, but at least it both had an interesting idea, dead rock stars vs their successors in modern day, versus an easy one (animal matchups) it abandoned for the final match and used REALLY fucking insultingly in the first match. Seriously I don’t mind a WELL done fat joke, as an overweight guy myself, but this was just...

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In it’s purest form.

Winner: Rockstarmageddon 3 to 2

Special Guest:

Each episode had a guest for the time machine... and this one is again no real contest, Rockstarmageddon wins.

For Rockstarmageddon the show brought back frequent guest star , wrestling legend Stone Cold Steve Austin, who I enjoy and was indeed part of my childhood and star of many video games and one of my brother’s all time favorite wrasslers. The show contrasts his blue collar hellion image with him having made the machine, getting quantum mechanics and unlike nick getting that Keith Richards is dead. Austin clearly gets the show, is fully on board playing along and has fun escorting Hendrix back to the machine and getting his revenge on Nick for doubting him that Keith Richards was alive. He just fits perfectly into the show.

The revival.. could not get him, likely because he didn’t want to or saw the script and rightfully stone cold stunnered them, i.e. what he shoudl’ve done when Adam Sandler offered him Grown Ups 2. Seriously Adam why bring him in if he’s not going to do something wrestling related to you? This is why people don’t like your films. That and you keep giving your old buddy rob increasingly racist work. And david spade work. And nick swarsdon work. Please do keep giving Shaq work though he’s actually not half bad.

So instead they bring in Einstein and the joke.. is that he swears a lot and drinks a lot and pulls his pants down at the end.> That.. that’s it. I mean the original , at least the episode given to me, didn’t make a GREAT impression, but at least it was creative. The Reboot came off as shockingly lazy and half assed, with lesser voice actors for our hosts and far less effort put in and this is the biggest emblem of that. Soooo

Winner; Rockstarmageddon 4 to 2

Final Round: Their Not Dead

The final round is a short one and while the winner is already decided, might as well. Both episodes do a joke about one of the guests NOT being dead.. but once again Rockstar is more clever about it. Nick is CERTAIN Keith Richards is dead, and forces Stone Cold to bring him to the present... only for Keith to show up, and there be two keiths. One fades away due to time travel stuffs, a REALLy damn good gag, and Nick’s dogged instance he’s not dead despite everyone knowing he isn’t is just damn funny.

IN contrast all they have for the late great Adam West.. is insisting he’s dead. That’s it. that’s all they got. It’s not funny, it’s disprectful to Adam who while not an a list actor did a ton of stuff after batman. I mean the simpsons alone should shut them the fuck up...

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This one short gag is a MUCH better one than that entire 7 minutes. It was also DEEPLY uncomfortable now Adam’s passed. So naturally

The Winner of this Segment and Overall; Rockstarmageddon.

I wouldn’t say I LIKED either episode this go round, both had some pretty bad spots..but it’s very clear that while the original had it’s flaws, it was creative, had tons of energy, and a great voice cast. The revivial... has a good chris farley impersonator and that’s it. It’s very clear the people behind the reboot just don’t get the show and are doing the lazy bare minimum. While I didn’t LIKE most of the matches in Rockstarmageddon, I can at least respect the craftmanship: the animation, host jokes and energy is just BETTER. There’s a care and craft the revivial dosen’t have and the drop in quality is noticeable.

So yeah overall the original wins.. but the episode chosen clearly wasn’t it’s best. That being said both had some good moments, and I would be open to watching more if any one wants to comission it. This experiment has been intresting so let me know in the comments if you want to see more of these and i’ll see you at the next rainbow. And please join my patreon at patreon.com/popculturebuffet.

#celebrity deathmatch #lenny kravitz #jimmy hendrix #keith richards #dave matthews #shaggy #bob marley #adam west #christian bale #horatio sanz #chris farley #jamie fox #ray charles

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faintblueivy · 4 years

Text

Querencia - BoruSara Royal AU

Written for lovely @miratriarch! It was my secret santa gift for her! I did not have enough time on my hand to post it earlier but here it is now! Hopefully you all will enjoy it!

Genre: Fluff and a little of everything

words: 8k

Ao3 link

Querencia

The place where one’s strength is drawn from; where one feels at home; the place where you are your most authentic self.

"Have you heard?"

Normally, Sarada considered herself above doing undignified acts like eavesdropping, but right now, in this tea party she had no other work to do. Suffering from the epitome of boredom, Sarada's ears picked up the talk of some daughters of some lower lords. And despite not wanting to, she found herself unable to tear away from their conversation.

"Prince Boruto! He's coming back from the front lines. I’ve heard that the King and Queen are celebrating his arrival with a ball arranged in his honour!"

Of course. They would be talking about him.

Boruto Uzumaki, the son of King Naruto Uzumaki and Queen Hinata Uzumaki, the heir to the throne of the kingdom of Wind was returning back. After spending two years on the front lines, and four before for his education, trying to suppress violence and protect the citizens of the Alliance, he was coming back Home. Of course, a grand cause of celebration and joy for both - the common citizens and the royal family. One had their Prince coming back, and the other had their son returning home. And obviously, also a blessed occasion for power and prestige hungry lords who were desperately hatching plans to make the young crown prince marry one of their daughters.

Sarada sighed. It was a sad scenario for their society that everything around them was supposed to be about power, prestige and money. But unfortunately, as much as she loathed to admit it, she was a part of that vicious circle.

She remembered the wave of happiness that swept over her father’s court when the letter from King Naruto had arrived a week ago. As her father read the invitation himself, she had watched a tiny smile grace his lips. He passed over the letter to her mother and she too, could hardly hold her spirits and bright smile on her face spoke of her joy over the matter. Unaware of the contents of the letter, she had been inquisitive of it. The letter was then brought to her.

She admitted she had to read the letter twice before forcing herself to believe that this was true because the letter not only had King Naruto’s signature but also the royal insignia. The first half of the letter was the official information but the second part was written in a weird messy scrawl that she immediately recognized as the King’s. It read:

Dear bastard, I’m letting you know this information in advance because I want you, Sakura and Sarada here at least a week before Boruto returns. I won’t take no for an answer. The invitation to the ball will come a week later. Come as soon as you can, Sasuke. Hoping to see you soon!

Sarada understood the reason her parents were smiling. Both her father and King Naruto had been best friends since their childhoods. The two of them have seen the worst of each other but still remained together through the years of conflict and war, and their bond was one of the most heartwarming things that she had ever seen.

…

She was back from her low tea, responding to the letters that the citizens of the Fire kingdom had written to their dear crown princess when the news of the arrival of the invitation was conveyed to her. She rushed to her father's chambers, only to find her parents laughing at something.

"Oh, Sarada!" Her mother exclaimed seeing her. "Come here!" The queen gestured for her to sit and her father immediately slid to a side to give her some space. As soon as she was seated, the invitation was thrust into her hands. And as King Naruto had promised, the invitation was for the Ball - arranged around a month later from the date. Below, there was personal note of invitation written by both King and Queen, inviting her parents to help arrange the festivity.

This is how two weeks later, Sarada found herself in premisses of the Wind Castle. The winter was in full swing and even though it was not as cold as her kingdom, but as namesake, the wind castle was windy. Sarada watched the tiny snowflakes dance around, the snow had just begun precipitating. They had arrived yesterday, with a large ensemblement of gifts and presents and were greeted by a warm welcome by the King and the Queen and their daughter - Princess Himawari. The ball was a matter of great importance, so all of the necessary tasks were divided among the supervision of all the royals present.

Her father and the King were busy sending invitations and scouting for the safety and security of their guests. With a ball this grand, it was obvious that all of the important people of The Great Alliance will be present. Her mother had taken the charge of decorations and arrangements, while the Queen was arranging for food and beverages and, she was tasked with boarding arrangements for the invitees.

The preparations were being made on a massive scale and it was pure coincidence when the queen walked with her party across the room that Sarada had been preparing.

“Princess Sarada?”

She called out. Her voice was soft, but held enough authority for the maids to bow and leave the room to give them privacy.

“Good morning, your majesty.”

Sarada courtesized to the Queen gracefully and the older woman smiled. “I’m honestly immensely grateful for your help. And undoubtedly,” she turned around to take a look of the entire room, “You are doing amazing.”

“Thank you for your kind words, majesty.”

Hinata nodded and sat on one of the large ornate chairs, and patted the space beside her in a gesture to make her sit. Who was she to deny the royal matriarch so Sarada took the place offered.

“I think we are above such formalities Sarada. I want you to understand that we see you as a part of our family and I want you to think of us the same way, child. So please, be as free and comfortable as you want.”

Sarada nodded, overwhelmed by the loving gestures of the Queen. If her mother was a bright and encouraging woman, the Queen was a kind, empathetic and loving person. They were vastly different in their codes of conduct, but both of them shined in their respective roles as the Queens of their respective Kingdoms. When Sarada thought about the kind of Queen she wished to become , these two women were her greatest inspirations.

And Sarada had to admit, having spent a lot of her childhood running through these halls, this place definitely felt like home.

…

The entire castle is thrust into chaos when the news of Prince's arrival in a few hours is circulated. All the preparations are done haphazardly and the entire castle is ordered to assemble at the east entrance.

"Wasn't he supposed to arrive tomorrow?" Sarada asked the maid helping her dress up.

"Yes, your highness, Prince Boruto was scheduled to arrive tomorrow. But the news of his arrival is absolutely true." The maid replied, sorting out her skirts.

Sarada sighed and stared at her reflection in the mirror as the maids around her flitted, some of them dressing her and others plaiting her hair in an elegant braid. She noticed how sharp her face appeared and how taller she looked.

Would he notice too?

Last time they had met, she was ten and he was eleven. He was a loud, rambunctious kid with a big grin and bright blue eyes. Had he changed too? It was hard to envision him differently.

She was dressed up with finesse and up and about and exited her room only to meet a swarm of servants rushing out to welcome their Prince. She had always known how much the people in this castle adored him. The older servants wanted to see their young troublemaking Prince and the younger ones wanted to catch a glimpse of their young handsome future monarch.

Sarada came to stand with her parents, not close and not too far from them either. The King and Queen of Wind, and Princess Himawari were standing the farthest down the massive stairs, eager to welcome their son with loving arms and it took only a few moments, but Prince's procession was visible. And even from this far Sarada could see him riding at the front, his horse was the fastest as approached the castle gate with a big smile.

He reined in the horse just a few feet away from the stairs and jumped down.

"Brother!" The little princess screamed and rushed to her brother who gathered her in a large embrace and the sight was so pure that even Himawari's strict governess did not seem to have the heart to reprimand. Both Naruto and Hinata approached their children and it was honestly, a heartwarming reunion.

It was then he noticed the presence of her parents, and an elated smile came over his face. He stepped near her parents and greeted them properly with a respectful bow and Sarada giggled as her mother squealed and pulled him in a tight embrace. Sarada had a personal experience with those hugs and was impressed when Boruto did not ask to be released even after a few seconds. Her father said something to him but she couldn't hear, due to the distance and the noise. He replied something smiling and suddenly his gaze flicked up, straight towards her.

The moment their eyes met, something inside her stomach flipped. She watched as the recognition lit up in his eyes, and he almost stepped forward as if to approach her but the sudden wave of cheer from the castle staff broke them out of their trance. Sarada smiled when the old maids of the castle greeted him with tearful eyes but he was loving in the way he wiped off their tears and talked to them with all the excitement he could spare. And she watched the respect and adoration in their eyes grow for their Prince by leaps and bounds. But what she didn't know was that every time he could, the Prince would definitely steal a glance in her direction.

…

Dripping with sweat, Boruto was having the time of his life. Battling his old instructor in a swordfight and overpowering the old guy was satisfactory in ways he could not describe. It reflected his improvement and passion for an activity that was not only enjoyable to him but also as a necessary as the royal heir.

He stepped forward and swung his blade in an arc and the old man used his sword to block it, but Boruto was swift, he slid the sword underneath his master's and tugged it away with strength. A loud clang reverberated throughout the practice grounds as his opponent's sword was out of bounds.

His master had a delightful smile on his face. He raised his hands and clapped for the Prince and Boruto smiled in return.

"You did well, your highness. I'm impressed! You've turned into a fine swords master." The man praised him.

"Thank you, Master. Your words mean a lot to me." Boruto bowed, expressing his gratitude to man who taught him this skill.

"Oh, it looks like it's over! Prince Boruto is unoccupied now!"

Boruto felt the hair on the back of his neck stand at the distant scream. His body froze and he did not dare to turn back, even for a glance. His teacher was kind enough to understand his predicament, but evil enough to enjoy it to the fullest. He teased, "If I were you, your highness, I would have sprinted away and never looked back."

Boruto gave him a nod before doing exactly as what he was told to. He sheathed his sword back and broke into full speed. Panic jumped up his throat when he heard a cacophony of shrill voices and pitter-patter of feet following him at a speed they shouldn't.

It had been the same scene since the day he had returned and got even more out of hand when the guests for the Ball started arriving one by one. After the lords of different states began offering their daughters to his parents and listed off their qualities as if they were livestock and even hinted at the amount of dowry that may be sent, his parents had put their foot down and announced that his wife was going to be the woman he chose for himself. It seemed to calm down the situation a little for a few days only to get worsened when the daughters realised that they could woo him themselves.

Who knew that the desperation of an unmarried lady was more fearsome than the sword of an enemy soldier on the battlefield. Boruto

Uzumaki had made the mistake of underestimating these dainty young women. And he was going to pay for it dearly.

Though, only if they manage to catch him. He smirked. This was his castle. The place he had spent his entire childhood and he was aware of every nook and corner of their estate. He swiftly turned around a corner and grinned. The old oak tree still stood tall. Of course, he knew gardens here like the back of his hand.

He climbed the tree barely breaking a sweat and praised his luck when the window directly in front of the tree, which led to a secluded room was opened. He walked on a sturdy branch and grabbed the upper one before swinging himself inside the chamber.

"Oooof!"

Unfortunately his landing was not as graceful as he expected because the moment he landed, the carpet beneath his boots slid away, forcing him to land straight on his bottom.

"I had my doubts, but today, you've done nothing but confirmed them."

He froze up, hearing a feminine voice so close in his vicinity. He gathered a lot of courage and dared to turn in the direction where he assumed the speaker was.

She was sitting there, on a chair, dressed in plain white and maroon robes, dark hair held in a low bun without any accessories to decorate them. He noticed that she had a book in her hand, the cover definitely written in a forgein language.

"Sarada? Is...that you? This is your room?" He asked, standing up and dusting himself off as he sauntered over to her.

She had grown up, even beautifully, if he might add. Her slender figure and dark piercing eyes were noticeable in ways he should not think of, as a gentleman, but he couldn't help himself from the pink blush tinting his cheeks.

"Yes. You might have noticed had you entered like any sane human does, my prince. A path of entrance called door exists."

Oh. That sharp tongue did not grow away. A part of him was happy about it. Sarada would not be the Sarada he knew if not for her quick witted sarcastic remarks. But she was not wrong though. Like at all.

"I'm sorry! My sincere apologies! I didn't know this."

He bowed to her deeply to emphasize his regret over causing her trouble but she waved him off.

"Please calm down now. What's done is done." She said calmly, not at all panicky the way a woman should be if a man bursts into her room like he had done. He deduced the reason behind this was the small dagger resting beside her cushion.

"No! No. This is highly inappropriate. I shouldn't have done this. I'm a grown man now. I should behave like one." He buried his face into his palm and Sarada bit back how he was just proving his own point.

"Yes, you probably should. But if you don't mind letting me know, what happened? Hope you did not break a vase today."

She smirked and gestured for him to take the chair beside her.

"Hey! I did that when I was...six!" He yelled, placing himself on the seat.

"And how does that help you?"

"What? Sarada!"

His petulant expression made Sarada finally break her facade she burst into giggles.

"Yes, you are still the same old Boruto."

He paused, eyes wide,"Is that a good thing?"

"Hmmm...maybe." She gave him a tiny smile. "How was your training, if you don't mind telling me?"

"Eh? Of course, I don't! It was…" he stopped for a moment, trying to find the right words to describe,"-exhilarating. And exhausting. We learned something new everyday. It was informative... and, uh, fun? I was allowed to meet all kinds of people and understand their ways of living. I liked it there." He muttered the last line with a sense of nostalgia.

"Oh, you did not wish to come home?" She unconsciously fisted the silk of her robes.

"No! No! Home is Home, Sarada. I longed to see Mother, Father and Hima everyday." He admitted, giving her a small smile.

Did you think of me too?

Sarada had the question on the tip of her tongue but decided not to let it out.

"Enough about me! What about you? As the Crown Princess of Fire, you must have had your fair share of endeavours."

Almost surprised at his interest for her life, she nodded. "That, I had. I have been trained in several arts of weapons and battlefields alongside music, art and other required assets. But…"

Boruto tilted his head to a side, a questioning look present on his face.

"Most people believe that...I'll marry an appropriate suitor and give the Kingdom it's much needed King."

Boruto felt his brows shot up in immense surprise.

"Marry and give someone else the crown that is rightfully yours? What kind of dirty politics is that? Are you okay with that?" He asked, clenching his fist and expressing righteous indignation over the matter.

"Of course not!" She exclaimed, her mouth set in a firm line, "I do not wish to be rude, but I've spent my blood, sweat and tears to become a worthy Queen."

He relaxed, as if it was the only answer he wanted to hear. "That is a relief to hear. Because I would hate to be partnered with some unworthy misogynistic scoundrel to keep the alliance."

"Partnered?" She questioned.

"Yes! After all, I've always imagined you to be one of the heads of the alliance in the future." He said that with so much nonchalance that it made Sarada aware of the amount of the faith he had in her as a capable future ruler. And it made her wanting to be nothing but honest with him. So, she confessed, "I'm not opposed...to marriage though."

"Huh?" He looked stunned.

"I do not mind marrying an appropriate match if they are kind to my people and respectful to my parents. I would not mind sharing my throne or my crown if they prove themselves worthy of it. " she said firmly, putting forth her views.

"I see." Boruto nodded in acknowledgement.

They settled into a comfortable silence and Sarada had to admit that it was not as awkward she expected. She had believed that with how busy his schedule appeared, the only time they might have met would have been the Ball. It was an absolute surprise when he had burst through her window, albeit, not a bad one per say, but she would not tell him that. Her heart felt so warm and full knowing how much he trusted her that she could not stop herself from telling him. He was examining the books she had on her table when she spoke up.

"Thank you, Boruto."

He blinked. "Is there any reason you wish to thank me for?"

She gave him a thankful smile. "I'm simply glad to know that you believe that... I'm worthy of my Kingdom's crown."

He shook his head and returned her smile.

"Sarada...do not ever let anyone make you believe that you are in the wrong. Because you are not. I have faith in you."

He stood up, and bowed to her grandly, even dipping on one knee as he continued," Your future Majesty, Sarada Uchiha, Queen of the great Kingdom of Fire."

She laughed at his grandiose gesture, even a palm on her mouth failed to muffle her sounds. And Boruto had to admit, that coy expression on her face was making his heart pound and leave him breathless.

And the sudden force of his feelings slamming into his conscience made him realise that if he had been standing, his knees surely would have given out. And just a genuine smile from her was enough for the ugly maelstrom of wretched feelings to arise again from the deep corners of his mind.

As a young child, he had been of a carefree attitude. It was only after he was sent out that he understood the warmth of Home and care of Family. He missed his parents and his sister. But they we're not the only ones. He also missed the cook who would secretly bake him treats. He missed his tutor and his master.

And he also missed Sarada.

He does not have a memory of the first time they met, but for as long as he can remember, they were together. But stepping away from the safe confines of his parents' sanctuary introduced him to the harshness of life.

Things changed when he learned that the companions around him had their sisters and friends and acquaintances were getting engaged or married. The realisation was hard to accept. To believe that one day, Sarada and Himawari would be married to men suitable for them and he'd be left alone with a wife he probably wouldn't want.

It was cruel. It was cruel in ways he did not wish to think of.

"Are you certain that you're not in love with her?"

A friend, his senior, had asked him after listening to his jumbled up feelings. And Boruto had spent countless sleepless nights wondering the answer to that question.

When the news of her debut ball had reached his ears, his selfishness knew no bounds. The entire scenario had simply made him realise how hard it would be to see Sarada with another person. He hoped desperately that the Uchiha Princess had yet to meet any man that she would end up desiring. Atleast not before, he manages to express his own feelings to her.

And a part of him loathed himself for this selfishness.

He was deep in his labyrinth of thoughts when a loud knock pushed him out of his musings.

"Hide!" Sarada whispered furiously, pushing him inside one of the largest almirahs present in her room.

"Wha-" Before he could even finish his word, the door was slammed shut on his face. He carefully and silently slid the door, only a tiny bit to see the chaos happening.

"Your highness!" He immediately recognized the shrill voice af Miss Jane, the daughter of one of the Northern lords of Wind.

"Yes? How may I help you?"

"I hope we did not disturb you, your highness, but we just wanted to ask if you knew where Prince Boruto is?"

Sarada made an act of looking surprised, before giving them a smile. And Boruto had to bite back a laugh at how fake it looked.

"I'm sorry to disappoint you, ladies, but I’m afraid that I don't know where the Prince is."

She craftily engaged the young women in a conversation and signalled him to escape out of the back door of her room. It was only after Boruto was in the safe confines of his room that it hit him that the gestures and hand signals she had made when letting him know how to escape were the same ones they used when they used to play around as children.

…

Boruto sighed in relief. After an entire day of dealing with diplomats from all over the alliance, meeting the important lords, reading about the newly signed treaties and laws, he was finally spared. More often than not he had the urge to ditch all these things and run away but that was allowed when he was a child. But now, as a young adult and a future monarch, it would be utterly disgraceful on his part. And especially after making a fool out of himself in front of Sarada yesterday, he had to prove to both her and himself that he has changed. And for the better.

She had been working tirelessly to make the people of her country and the members of the alliance to acknowledge her as the heiress to the throne of Uchihas. And if he slacked up here, it would be a shame for her.

They were rivals. For as long as he can think off. In studies, literature, music and diplomacy. But the list did not end there. They were opponents in fencing, fishing, horse riding and all the possible sphere of lives he could think of. He could not bring himself to think the way these people do because time and time again Sarada has proved herself to be his equal. She was someone he admired deeply, no questions asked. So, yesterday's conservation had been ingrained in his brain. It irked him to no end. He personally wanted to meet all of these people who ever made her feel inadequate and challenge them for a duel and defeat them so bad that they don’t ever dare to raise their heads again in front of her.

He huffed. Mood ruined, he walked to the fencing practice grounds, ready to unload himself by swinging his sword around a little bit. It was after he entered through the gate, he heard the tell tale swish of a sword swinging. As experienced as he was, he could tell that the person’s moves were coordinated and contained and even powerful. Entranced, he moved towards the sounds and felt his jaw slack at the sight.

There she was, Uchiha Sarada, in all her glory.

Dressed in a plain tunic and dark slacks and hair held in a high ponytail, she had sweat dripping down her chin. She was swinging her sword around and Boruto was mind-boggled over how smooth her moves appeared, how fluid the transition between her moves looked. Entranced, he stood there for god knows how long before her voice breaks through the silence of the training grounds.

“How long do you plan on standing there?”

He almost jumps and blushes hard in embarrassment and darts his gaze away. After a few seconds of silence, he catches her staring at him from the side of his eyes and she is smiling knowingly, her sword dangling limp on her side.

“I was here to blow some steam off. Would you like to have a spar with me?” He asked, examining a nearby sword.

“I would be honoured to.”

Boruto grinned at her response. Shedding off his coat and rolling up the sleeves of his dress shirt, he could not hide the glee in his actions. As well as he knew Sarada, she was going to give him a run for his money. She was strong, he knew that. But he wasn’t planning on losing either. He entered the battle space, jumped around a little to warm himself up and then took a stance. Sarada followed his suit and both of them were smirking.

“Ready?” He raised a brow smugly.

“Yes!”

“Then here I come!”

That was all he said before the loud clangs of metal striking reverberated through the entire area and if you ask him, it was music to his ears. To any untrained eyes it would seem as if they were dancing around each other, moving in sync. But Boruto could not hold back his mad smile. Missing each other by hair breadth and revelling in the intensity of the moment was spine tingling. The adrenaline coursed through his veins and oh lord, he was enjoying every second of it. And he was sure that Sarada felt the same way if the smirk on her lips and the feral look in her eyes was anything to go by.

It was only when the hush of whispers increased to a level where they couldn’t be ignored was when he realised that they were surrounded by people. Mostly peers of their age. Men and women alike. He guessed that ladies might have followed him like they had done a few days before and men might have been interested to do some training themselves.

“I didn’t know princess Uchiha could use a sword!” someone exclaimed from the crowd. The comment would have been fine if Boruto had not sensed a condescending tone speaking it.

“Poor girl. It’s such a shame that her parents could not produce a male heir. It is just causing her grievances of learning activities that a man should.”

Boruto felt his blood boil at those words. And he was sure that Sarada had heard it as well. The widening of her eyes and clenching her fist was enough of a reaction for him to know.

“Absolutely true. Ladies look better with fans in their hands, not swords.”

Sarada faltered for a second there and Boruto felt a rush of horror when his sword almost grazed her side. He heard gasps at the almost injury that she might have obtained but it only took people only a moment to start with their gossiping again.

“I wonder if she is trying to score Prince’s affection like this.”

“It is possible. She always pretends as if she does not care about the Prince but we know better. She is as cunning as they come.”

God, what the heck these people are spouting nonsense about?

Can they not see it for themselves? Or were they being deliberately blind to Sarada’s prowess as a warrior?

He knew he could not allow them to continue this any longer. This was getting absolutely out of hand and he could sense agitation in Sarada’s strikes. He had to protect her honour. This was not only about Sarada’s status as the Uchiha heiress, but also as a woman and a daughter. And his friend.

And the woman he loved.

Another sharp call for Sarada and he heard someone again and this time he knew what he had to do.

“There is no way she can beat Prince Boruto. He defeated me in the academy. Any amaetuer Princess running around with a sword is no match for him-AAAAAAHHHH!” The boy was cut off by his own scream of terror as he fell on his butt, a sword lodged in earth less than an inch away from where he stood. Everyone whirled around towards the sparring field and to their immense shock, the Prince of the wind was standing there.

Swordless.

But Princess Sarada still had her sword in her hand. It took a few whole moments for the gathered crowd to register what exactly happened. Even Sarada looked stunned.

Boruto smirked. One wrong move from him was all he needed for Sarada to disarm him and that is exactly what he did. And of course, she was never one to disappoint.

A combination of a minute mistake from him and a small demonstration of her fine skills.

He lost.

She won.

She whipped her stunned gaze at him and he gave her a knowing wink in return and then stepped forward, casually suntering towards his sword.

“I always knew you were an amazing swordsman, your highness.” He claimed, voice loud enough for everyone to hear. Grabbing the hilt of his sword,he set his eyes straight towards the perpetrators, as if challenging them to refute his argument, as he pulled it out. “I’m honoured to have battled you.”

The strength in his gaze and conviction in his voice forced heads to bow down.

“Thank you for being such lovely spectators to our spar.” He announced to the crowd, “You all may leave now.”

Nobody questioned his authority as they began to file and leave one by one, leaving him and his friend the only people last standing.

“Why did you do that?”

It was the first thing she asked after being left alone.

“What are you talking about? I made a mistake and you exploited it to defeat me. That’s it.”

“No, it’s not!” She raised her voice, anger seeping into her features. “You were defeated by a woman. Boruto, do you not understand how horribly this will damage your reputation?”

They were barely a foot away from one another, the air around them was charged with tension but Boruto was not backing down from this.

“Does it look like I care? You know it as well as I do, if the match was fair then we both had equal chances of coming out on top.” He argued and sighed,”-And let them talk. I am confident in my abilities enough to defeat each and every single one of the warriors who were present here. In Fact, I am certain you could have defeated them all with only one arm if you wanted.”

Sarada stood their dumbfounded as he proceeded to clean his sword, ready to sheath it back.

His utmost confidence in her abilities and his adamancy to consider her and value her as an equal made her tremble on inside. He was so stubborn, but in a way where he did things right. His refusal to accept the wrongs happening around him and trying his best to change them made him endearing in ways she could not hope to describe. She admired him. His courage. His righteousness in accepting every individual as his equal irrespective of their status or gender was incredible.

Lost in her thoughts, she was startled when Boruto waved an arm in front of her face.

“Uh?”

“I was saying, since you won, I would like to treat you. Say, would you care for some of Robert's lemon tarts?"

Oh, when it came to Mr. Robert, the infamous cook of wind castle and his delicious lemon tarts, then who was she to decline.

…

“Let me ask again. Why are we, responsible adults, are sneaking around like thieves, in your castle for a tray of lemon tarts that your benevolent cook would gladly offer to his prince.”

She asked acidly, crouching down in the corridors to avoid any mindful eyes, and glared the back of Boruto’s head.

He turned to her, eyes bright and gave a grin.

“For old times’ sake Sarada.”

The sound of approaching footsteps made him turn his head back and Sarada could not refrain herself from rolling her eyes. But then again, she didn’t need to follow him around like this, though she was still doing it.

For old times’ sake indeed.

A few minutes later they were sitting beneath the oak tree in front of her window with a tray full of lemon tarts. She bit into one and almost moaned at the mixture of the sour and sweet flavor of the delicacy blended in such a way that left nothing but more craving on your tongue.

“It’s good? Isn’t it?” Boruto asked, already on his second one.

Sarada hummed in approval, finishing off her first. This moment mirrored the memories of their childhood together when they would sneak around the palace, steal as many lemon tarts as their small hands would allow and run here hoping that their hideout and deed would not be discovered. Because the Queen could be scary when she wanted to be. Maybe nostalgia was the reason that she had requested the queen to allow her this room which was in an entirely opposite wing of the castle.

But she wouldn’t tell anyone that.

“You know,” she spoke, when on her third tart, “That was quite reckless of you.”

“Hm?”

“One mistake could have cost you your life.”

He munched on his fifth one and gave her a carefree grin. “Nah, you would have not hurt me. You are too good for that. And even if something happened, it would have just left another scar, nothing much.”

Scar.

Another scar.

Her gaze flicked towards the one plain in view. Over his right eye. It extended from over his eyebrow to the near edge of his nose. She had heard of it. He had gained the injury in a rebellion against the alliance last year. But she never knew how he had gotten injured in the first place.

Sensing the question in her gaze he gave her a wry smile.

“The rebels had a group of children as hostages. I infiltrated their hideout and fought a few of them. One was cunning enough to rush to injure kids. I shielded them with my body. That is how I got it.”

Sarada stared up at him in awe. This man risked his life, so stupidly, to save some little kids.

“Are you insane? Why did you not wait for more people to arrive?”

“Ehhh! One of the kids they took as hostage was very sick. He could have died in that damp and dark place due to his breathing problems. I didn’t have enough time." He explained, his eyes staring at the far away sky "-But it was insane alright."

He chuckled then suddenly grew silent. He tilted his head towards her apprehensively.

"Uh...does it look ugly?"

Sarada blinked twice. The man who is almost always brimming with confidence for almost everything he did was self conscious? About a scar?

Sarada felt her fingers brushing the bangs over his forehead gently. She knew it was inappropriate for her to touch him like this, but the genuine anxiety in his eyes made her want to convince him in any possible way that it was not a bad thing.

"No." She whispered, her thumb tracing the scar tenderly "-I like it."

And how could she not? The scar was a testimony of his kindness and spirit. Something that she cannot help but appreciate as a woman and as a future monarch.

He is staring at her with wide blue eyes, looking shell-shocked. And Sarada immediately pulled her hand to her chest, face red. A part of her mentally curses herself for her audacity as she is unable to lift up her head. The green of the grass at her feet was much more interesting.

She does not witnessed the softening of his gaze. He slowly stood up, his sword resting on his hip and the empty tray of tarts in his left hand. He bent

a little and offered her his hand. Her gaze immediately flickered up to him and he was standing right in front of her with the gentlest expression she has ever seen a man direct at her. It was the same way her father looked at her mother.

She hesitated for a second but Boruto waited for her patiently, the smile on his face never faltering and his eyes never straying away from hers. She felt her heart hammering in her ears as she placed her small hand into his. And his smile widened at her gesture, his eyes displaying an array of emotions that she could not bring herself to decipher at the moment.

"Thank you, Sarada."

He uttered these words with gratitude and Sarada felt her heart swell with feeling that she was too scared to name. Everytime he smiled like that, a swarm of butterflies fluttering inside her stomach seemed to expand upto her throat.

She was not stupid.

She knew what it meant. Her feelings for him had already surpassed admiration and respect. What she felt now...was a much more intimate feeling. A realisation precious enough that she desperately wanted to hold on to.

He helped her up but did not let go as they walked down together towards the castle, fingers still entwined. And for the first time in a long while...she did not care about people's opinions anymore. The gentle squeeze of his hand reminded her that he appreciated it.

Then and there, she made a promise to herself that she will stay by his side as long as he wanted.

…

The ball was the grandest of the grandeur and Sarada had to accept that her mother had done nothing but a fabulous job with the arrangements and decorations. The ballroom was ornamented with a myriad of flowers of white, lavender. The silk curtains in a shade of rich purple enhanced the scene. Anyone who entered the room was left in awe of the colours beautifying it.

The uncountable number of dishes adorned the tables - breads, meats, salads, cakes, tarts, pastries - you name it. Everything tasty enough to be addicting. The wines were of the finest quality in existance and it just showed that the Queen had outdone herself again.

Sarada tittered around, greeting, meeting and dancing with people. As the future Ruler of the Kingdom of Fire, she had to be in good graces of all of these important people. Dressed in a splendidly beautiful gown in shades of blue, navy and white with golden and silver lacework decorating the bodice and the hem of her skirt, and hair twisted up in an elaborate updo with gorgeous ornaments adorning her and the crown over her head represented her as the heiress of the great kingdom of fire very much.

She had just been out of her twelfth dance of the night when she felt a sudden tap on her shoulder. She whirled around only to come face to face with the person in whose honour this Ball was arranged.

He was dressed in a dark cloak in a shade of blue that accentuated his eyes, tunic in stark white with gold lacework and embroidery, and his hair slicked back in a fashionable hairstyle made him look gorgeous in ways she would not dare to describe.

All she could think was that Boruto looked magnificent. Befitting of the Prince of the Wind.

He smiled and gave her a graceful bow and stretched out a hand, "May I have this dance?"

"Of course, your highness." She smiled and slipped her hand into his.

The music started in a slow tempo, and he gently pulled her onto the floor, leading the dance with a confident temperament. Nevertheless, their presence alone on the dance floor together attracted a lot of attention. Sarada wondered if she wanted to be bothered by it but before she could come to any conclusion Boruto leaned in, and whispered gently in her ear, “You look beautiful tonight.”

Sarada smiled. “If I may say, you look handsome yourself, my prince.”

Boruto chuckled and started a little faster as the pace of the music increased. And Sarada giggled to herself knowing that it was futile to worry about what others thought of when she knew what she desired.

"It was such a shame that I didn't get to attend your debut ball."

He lamented, adjusting their movements in accordance with the music and enjoyed swirling her around the dance floor. His steps were flawless and contained and his grip was steady. He guided her through the crowd smoothly, never misstepping.

"Oh, is that disappointment I hear, your highness?" Sarada smiled mischievously, dark eyes glinting.

"Maybe." He grinned, pulling her closer to him.

"Well, to ease you a little, my first dance was with my father and the last one was with my teacher." She leaned into him a little, aware that the distance between them was less than proprietary accepted. But she couldn't care less at the moment.

"No random suitors?" He asked with wide eyes.

"No one was significant enough." Sarada claimed, her grip on his shoulder tightened a little.

"Oh, are you aiming a little high, Princess?" Boruto laughed, blue eyes boring into hers. She felt a pleasant tingling down her spine. His gaze was soft, but expressing a whirlwind of emotions that she could not distinguish in the moment alone.

Warmth, affection, tenderness and so much more. She breathed deeply, eyes coming to rest on the sapphire jewel on the centre of his chest. She couldn't look him in the eyes, not with what she was about to do.

"Well, I'm aiming for a young man with blonde hair and blue eyes."

Then what followed was silence. They swayed to the beat of instruments floating in the air, but all Sarada could hear was the thundering of her heart. She had been so forward, vulgar if people might say. She could not dare to meet his eyes. If she saw haze of rejection swimming in them, she might break. With every passing second, her fear was spreading through her limbs, the chill of a nightmare that you wish to escape but are not allowed to.

"I love you. Marry me."

His words are sudden, crystal clear and Sarada whipped her head up to look at him. He was smiling at her softly, and his eyes looked glossy.

"Marry me and claim me as yours. And let me claim you as mine."

He tugged her into his warmth, cradling her gently. "You can answer whenever you wish. I don't mind waiting."

As the music stopped, they separated, but Boruto didn't let go of her hand. He guided her to side, her hand still clasped in his. He turned to her, bending a little and brushing his lips over her gloved hand, his eyes never leaving hers.

Boruto is then summoned to his father's side to attend some of the guests. He lingered a little but left reluctantly anyway and it allowed Sarada to breathe and contemplate over the recent developments.

Why hadn't she answered him? When she knew what she wanted, why didn't she accept his proposal?

Maybe it was because how surreal all of this felt. How the person she had been in love with for so long, loved her back? It was mind boggling. But offered it himself. He offered to hold her hand and stay by her side forever. What more she could ask for?

She loved him.

She loved him, oh so much.

Just then she knew that waiting more was foolish. Seeking him out was not difficult. He was the heart of any show with his handsome grin and welcoming aura. But it's not easy, because every step she took towards him was harder, with more and more people approaching them, it felt as if the Universe itself was pulling them apart. Every new second felt like an eon.

She did not know if he heard her or felt her longing, but it was a surprise when he suddenly turned to her and their eyes met. looking concerned, he instantly moved towards her, worry wrinkling the edges of skin on the corner of his eyes.

It took him only a few seconds to reach her but Sarada felt like days passing in between.

"Is everything alright?"

"Yes, but...may we talk?" She gave a glance to the balcony, "Outside?"

He nodded, and guided her through the crowd of merry people. As soon as they stepped into the fresh air of the night, Sarada whispered, "I do not wish to wait anymore."

He whirled around, surprised and exclaimed, "What?"

"I said, I do not wish to wait anymore."

He was still looking at her as if she was a wonder of the moon but she leaned in and gently grasped his hand into hers. The warmth of his skin seeped through her glove and he looked him straight in the eyes, not scared of niceties of society imposed on them anymore.

"Claim me as yours, and let me claim you as mine."

The smile that broke on his lips was brilliant than the stars above. Sarada felt her heart skip a beat, and a flutter of untamed feelings rising up at the light shining in his eyes. He did not kiss her or held her close, he simply smiled, and tightened his clasp on her hand.

And at that moment, Sarada knew, this was what happiness felt like.

...

I'm, tbh, quite proud of how things turned out for this fic. I loved how they managed to find their homes in each other! They are both precious! haha! Please let me know if you enjoyed this fic! And lots of love for reading it!

#borusara #borusarafics #boruto x sarada #boruto and sarada #boruto uzumaki #sarada uchiha #boruto #sarada #boruto naruto next generations #royal au #adi writes

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