#I CANNOT EXPLAIN ANYMORE... I CANNOT DO IT

[suliigwp]

CHPATER ONE IN: MADMAX— MIRRORED HEARTS

Half Past You.

Max Verstappen x OC! Maxine

SULI: IT IS HERE FINALLY PART ONE I cannot promise how fast I'll finish this— also, the twitter pages will be written down mostly because I want this to be a long chapter with many smau parts and the limit to photos is 10 so😔 Tumblr please change that stupid limit — HOPE YOU LIKE THIS OMG

PLEEEASE ignore the scrambled photos with different girls and different time periods😭 max is MV33 in this bestie

ALSO DISCLAIMER you can imagine yourself as Maxine and Anastasia all you want, I just needed names so we could tell them apart and a little personality, other than that, you're the thing bestie

Warnings: none

2025

The energy in the arena is palpable, the kind that tastes electric in your mouth. Fans are screaming, crying, shaking in sequined jackets and worn-out tour shirts, each one of them clutching their own version of Maxine and Anastasia’s music like scripture.

This is the final show of the tour.

A soft dim begins to sweep over the crowd, a spotlight cutting down from the rafters like a holy blade, landing on the grand piano that waits at the center of the massive stage. Anastasia walks out first, all grace and slow steps, her silhouette greeted by the sound of thousands. A soft smile on her face, a blue Williams shirt—55 Sainz— on her back, wearing it proudly over her black skirt.

Then Maxine appears.

She walks — calm, grounded, sure. An expression that was rare in the past, brows relaxed. Red bull shirt—1 Verstappen.

Her mic is already in hand. She smiles. Her eyes scan the crowd — glowing phone screens, trembling hands, glitter-stained cheeks.

She stands there, silhouetted against the shifting lights, and says into the mic, her voice steady, intimate:

“Do you know what time it is?”

The crowd screams, but it fades quickly, as if they know what she’s going to say next matters.

“I don’t even have to explain it anymore.”

She glances toward Anastasia, who’s now seated at the piano, her fingers already hovering over the keys. They lock eyes — a quiet knowing, the kind only sisters by fire and blood can share.

“You know the story."

And with that, she nods to Anastasia.

The first chord rings out like breath in winter — cold, delicate, sharp.

A sound that lives in your ribcage.

The screen behind them goes dark.

Maxine steps into the center of the light, her shadow cast across the floor like memory. Her fingers curl tighter around the mic. Her eyes flutter shut.

And before she can even open her mouth, the crowd begins to sing — a soft wave of voices rising like prayer:

"I was right on time... you were half past gone..."

Her lips part. Her eyes open. But she lets them sing.

A beat later, she picks it up, her voice sliding in like a ghost returning home:

"And I was still holding on, To something we already left behind..."

The camera pans to the crowd. Rows upon rows of people sobbing. Clutching each other. Some mouthing the words, others screaming them, but all of them feeling it. Their love for her. For him. For what this song meant.

Maxine moves slowly across the stage, her voice steady even as her eyes scan the sea of lights. Her hand brushes over her stomach, over her heart, over the mic stand. Muscle memory. Pain memory.

And somewhere — in the private rows of the VIP box, Max sits.

He’s still.

He’s watched her perform this song dozens of times. Watched her relive what they went through. But tonight feels like a full circle.

Because she’s not crying this time.

She sings:

"It was half past you when I lost me too, And I’ve been crawling back ever since... haven’t you?"

The screen behind her flickers.

At first: blank. Then slowly on the screen appeared the cover of the album — "Track Twelve"

His glowing blue eye through his helmet.

The arena erupts.

"I couldn’t leave you. Even when I had to."

A breath.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2019

twitter

@cursedf1edits

the only madmax i acknowledge is max verstappen sorry not sorry 💅

9.2K Retweets • 32K Likes

@maxinespilled

max verstappen??? the guy with the helmet??? no bffr. maxine WALKED so he could run

3.1K Retweets • 21K Likes

@f1simp420

me looking up #madmax for verstappen content and ending up in a stan war with a singer’s fanbase called the MAXILLAS??????

1.9K Retweets • 11K Likes

@theeindieoracle

“the only madmax i know is max verstappen” — uncultured behavior tbh

4.6K Retweets • 28K Likes

@trackrat_tears

not me discovering a whole ass artist because i was trying to find a max verstappen helmet edit... maxine kinda ate tho

✨💀🩷

778 Retweets • 6.9K Likes

@velvetmaxine

y’all do realize maxine has had “madmax” on her bandcamp bio since 2016 right?? LIKE be fr

2.2K Retweets • 14K Likes

@maxverstappen_nl

i came here for red bull racing and ended up crying to a song about lost youth and soft bruises. thanks maxine ig

🫠

1.1K Retweets • 8.5K Likes

@spotifywars

maxine stans and max verstappen stans fighting over the tag #madmax every week is the best crossover since batman vs superman

1.3K Retweets • 9K Likes

@madmaxblends

max verstappen pushing limits. maxine screaming into a mic about her ex. same energy. #madmax

6.7K Retweets • 20.1K Likes

@MaxWellActually

theory: they’re secretly dating and the chaos is a PR stunt.🤔🤔🤔

4.4K Retweets • 18K Likes

@trenchpoet

the shared fandom is giving enemies to lovers fanfic potential and i’m ready

817 Retweets • 7.3K Likes

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

INT. BACKSTAGE DRESSING ROOM – EARLY EVENING – LONDON

The air is thick with hair spray, soft pop from a Bluetooth speaker drifting beneath the low buzz of crew voices outside the door. The mirror lights reflect off scattered compacts, water bottles, cords, and a pair of high heels long abandoned in the corner.

Maxine, barefoot, sits cross-legged in the plush makeup chair, eyes glued to her phone. Her eyeliner is perfect. Her nails are chipped.

Across from her, Anastasia is stretched dramatically across the little velvet couch, one arm hanging off the edge, iPad on her chest playing something they’ve both stopped paying attention to. There’s glitter on her cheekbone that neither of them put there.

A pause. Then—

Maxine breaths out softly. "...No."

Anastasia, Half asleep, muttered. “What.”

“No, like... no no. You’re not ready.”

She swipes, then stifles a laugh with the back of her hand.

Anastasia Grimaces. “Is it your ex?”

Maxine Huffed. “I WISH. It’s worse.”

Anastasia lifts her head just enough to squint at Maxine. “I literally don't have the emotional energy for anything worse than your ex. Tell me.”

“Okay. Context: have you ever heard of Max Verstappen?”

Her twin raised a brow. “The driver?”

Maxine modded. “F1 guy. Very fast. Very intense.”

She turns her phone around slowly, dramatically, and shows her the screen.

It’s a tweet. Two-panel image.

On the left: Max Verstappen, mid-race, face hidden behind a helmet, the blur of speed behind him.

On the right: Maxine, mid-performance, hair wild, eyes feral, arm thrown toward a crowd of thousands.

Caption:

> “don’t know which madmax scares me more tbh 💀💀💀”

Anastasia is quiet for two seconds.

Then—

She laughed loudly. “Oh My God!"

She launches upright, grabs the phone from Maxine and zooms in on both photos.

“No. This is SO cursed. Who did this."

“Wait—wait look at the replies—”

They scroll.

“the only madmax i know is verstappen”

“ok but you’ve clearly never seen her LIVE”

“uncultured behavior tbh”

“bro i literally thought this was a crossover episode”

“help they’ve both got the same energy. violence. zero patience. speed.”

Maxine's already crying with laughter. Through wheezing she says. “They’re making edits. They put me over a race montage.”

"Stop, Show me.”

She does.

A fancam, the tweet says:

> “madmax supremacy 🖤🔥”

Footage of Verstappen overtaking in Monaco cuts violently into Maxine screaming the final chorus of “Heaven Help My Enemies.”

Drums sync with engines.

Flashing lights blend with racetrack flares.

It shouldn’t work.

It absolutely does.

“This is fanfiction. I’m watching fanfiction in real time.”

Maxine chuckled. “Shut up. That’s so embarrassing.”

But she’s biting back a grin, already swiping through more. The hashtag is growing.

#madmax

#madmaxduetwhen

#madmax2fast2furious

She pauses on one concert photo. Someone’s holding up a sign:

“ONLY MADMAX THAT MATTERS 🖤🖤🖤”

Maxine takes a screenshot. Opens Instagram. Hesitates. “Okay. Do I acknowledge this? Just... lightly?”

Anastasia is absolutely no help. She’s crying from laughter again, curled into the couch like it’s too much.

“Please. Be vague though.”

Maxine, eyes gleaming, She hits post. Stares at it. Blinks.

“Oh my god what if he sees it.”

“Oh he’s definitely going to see it.”

The door opens. A production assistant pokes in to say five minutes to stage.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

instagram

maxinethemachine posted a story.

Caption—"it tastes amazing btw"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

INT. HOTEL ROOM – MONACO – LATE NIGHT

The room is dim, lit only by the soft orange glow of the city bleeding through the open balcony doors. Monaco still hums outside — boats clinking in the harbor, distant laughter echoing off marble walls. The afterparty is somewhere else, but Max Verstappen is here. Alone. Legs stretched out across a hotel bed that still smells faintly like champagne and engine oil.

He’s tired — the kind of tired that sinks into your bones — but he can’t sleep. The adrenaline hasn't left him. Neither has the noise in his head.

Phone in hand. Thumb scrolling. Thoughtless at first.

It starts with a random tweet.

“The only MADMAX I acknowledge is Max Verstappen 💅”

He scrolls past.

Another one.

“Y’all need to get some culture. The OG MadMax wears glitter eyeliner and rips hearts out on stage.”

He frowns.

Click.

It’s a fan edit. A brutal one. Half the screen is him — helmet down, Red Bull livery, sparks flying behind his car on the straight. The other half? Her. Maxine. Hair wild, body bent over a mic, screaming lyrics with her whole soul. Cut together to the sound of her chorus — something dreamy and violent, something that fits both of them too well.

He watches the full clip.

Twice.

Then checks the tag.

#madmax

It’s chaos.

People arguing. People laughing. People asking if they’re related, or dating, or if it’s some “cosmic twin flame crossover.” It’s meme pages. It's concert photos and race stills side-by-side. It's —

He stops.

Maxine’s face again, but different this time. A screen recording. A story she just posted.

His breath catches.

He taps into her profile. Waits for the circle to load.

There she is.

Her eyes never leave the camera. Never blink.

One brow arches, barely perceptible.

And then it’s over.

Two seconds, max.

But the damage is done.

Max stares at the screen for another five.

His jaw twitches — not in annoyance, not exactly. Something warmer. Amused. Curious. Caught off-guard.

A tiny scoff slips from his mouth. He lets the phone drop to his chest, arm sprawled out beside him as he stares up at the ceiling. A thousand thoughts move through him in silence.

Then, like it’s instinct, he reaches for his phone again.

Then he opens Instagram.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

maxverstappen followed you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

maxverstappen

Song • Faster by Maxine The Machine

Liked by redbull, lando and 796,929 others.

maxverstappen: another great weekend👏 thank you to the team! Onto the next

See all comments.

machinegirlie: OH SO YOU’RE A FAN NOW?????

madmaxinefans: the song choice… THE SONG CHOICE…

formulaforchaos: “Faster” by Maxine The Machine is such a loud choice for someone who’s never acknowledged the #madmax edits 😭😭😭

mercedesamgf1: We can’t even be mad tbh that song slaps

lanlandoz: Lando definitely picked the song for him don’t lie

redbullracerz: This is basically a soft launch and I refuse to be told otherwise

charles_leclerc: Max 👏 is 👏 faster 👏

glitterandgasoline: first the story post. now this. is this a duet rollout disguised as a motorsport career

maxinevault: She sips red bull in a story, he posts this 12 hours later. If they’re not texting I’m eating my steering wheel.

notmaxine: no bc he knew what he was doing. he scrolled past all the madmax memes and went “let me turn this up to 100 real quick”

lando: could’ve at least tagged her 💀

cheeky_sainz: If Max and Maxine collab, I want to be paid emotional damages in advance.

numberonestan: sir ur face card is never declining pls take a break

maxinexs: I thought y’all were joking about the soft launch but now I’m scared. This is way too loud for him.

redbullracing: Song choice is 🔥 just saying

cleaningmytears: This man’s jawline deserves a separate podium

oracle: 🫡 faster data, faster tracks, faster music?

burningrubberandbridges: Max Verstappen posting Maxine’s song??? he’s not even trying to be subtle now I’m SICK

haasf1team: We see what you did there 👀

f1: A champion with taste 🏁🎶

slowburnsyndrome: he could crash into my heart and I’d thank him

spotify: And just like that, “Faster” is trending again. Who’s surprised?

verstappenswife69: so when is the wedding or do I have to plan it myself

queenofspeedxo: the cake though

Your photo was liked by maxinethemachine.

maxinethemachine followed you back.

...

@/maxverstappen

every time i hear “madmax” it’s never about me anymore 😐

🕒 Feb 18, 2019 · 💬 13.1K Retweets 💖 78K Likes

->@/maxineonline

sorry not sorry 🧍🏻‍♀️

🕒 Feb 18, 2019

->@madmaxnation

DID SHE—

->@formulaicchaos

ok this is actually the funniest timeline to exist

_

He didn’t mean to be here.

Or maybe he did.

Max told himself he was “just curious.” The tweet thread had spiraled, memes exploded, Anastasia was tweeting unhinged things again (he’d never admit how often he checked her account now), and Maxine’s voice had been everywhere. It was getting harder to avoid it — not that he wanted to.

But now he was standing at the back of a stadium with a VIP pass around his neck, hat low, hoodie up, arms folded.

The lights went dark. The scream of the crowd surged like a wave, loud and electric, shaking the floor.

And then they walked out.

Maxine first, walking to center stage with that cool, calm fire in her eyes — long black coat, glittering boots, mic in hand like a sword. Anastasia followed her, flashing a sharp smile like she’d already won. Together, they owned the whole stage before even singing a note.

Max blinked as the screen behind them lit up with one bold word in all caps:

TIMES AGAIN

The audience lost it.

Max just… smiled.

...

Maxine looked different up here — freer, louder, alive. Her voice filled the arena like thunder and silk, cutting through bass and synths with power and pain. And every so often — whether planned or not — her eyes drifted into the crowd like she was searching for someone.

“Two kinds of Max in the world, and both think they’re the main character.”

The crowd screamed. She added, off-mic, “They’re both right.”

Max laughed under his breath. She was chaos.

Midway through a ballad, Maxine slowed her pacing. Her voice softened. Behind her, light scattered in soft white rays.

Then her eyes caught his.

Not for long. Just a flash. But long enough.

...

maxverstappen posted on his story.

Caption:

“Not mad. Just MadMax.” Tagged: @/maxinethemachine, @/anastasiaagain

•Song playing: "Kill The Lights (Live Version)"

...

@/maxineonline

was that max watching maxine or max watching madmax or max being mad that max is madmax

🕒 Feb 24, 2019 · 💬 18K Likes

->@/maxverstappen

yes.

🕒 Feb 24, 2019

...

@/maxineonline

📸 repost of meme:

“when your name’s max and you’re not even the main madmax anymore 💅”

Caption: it’s ok he can be my max too

->@/maxverstappen

ok but which max is which

🕒 Mar 1, 2019 · 💬 11.9K Retweets 💖 80K Likes

->@/maxineonline

we should meet to figure it out

->@madmaxdefenseforce

HELLO?????

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

-----Quote Tweets:

@/f1brainrot

NAH SHE KNOWS WHAT SHE’S DOING

@/madmaxfansunited

oh we're COOKED

@/mvasababe

wait is this like a dare 😭 bc i will personally fund it

@/maxverstappen liked your tweet.

-----💬 Top Replies

@/maxineonline

what if i kiss myself, do i win?

->@anastasiaagainofficial

you win every day darling 💋

@/carloslikespizza

nah imagine being max verstappen waking up to this

@/f1teaaccount

🧍🏽‍♀️he saw it. of course he saw it.

@/theoversteerfiles

I am visibly sweating

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

redbullracing posted a story.

Caption: "Ready for Quali! Special guests incoming👀👥🗣️"

...

It only felt like yesterday Maxine had been showing Anastasia the funny tweets at backstage and now they're both walking into the paddock, cameras flashing everywhere as they laughed, being escorted by a red bull employee to their garage.

"This place is crazy" muttered Anastasia as she looked around.

"I know right" Maxine whispered back. "We should definitely give max the VIP pass to our next concert, and whoever's the guy that invited us."

"You mean the team principal of Red Bull Racing?"

"Yeah, whatever."

The paddock was already buzzing, filled with journalists, photographers, team members, and sun slicing down through the awnings. But nothing — nothing — prepared them for the ripple that went through the atmosphere the second they walked in.

The camera flashes started before they even reached the gate.

Maxine was in her element. A deep crimson blouse, black tailored trousers, sleek shades, hair swept back in a loose twist. Her Red Bull pass caught the sunlight as it bounced off her earrings. She walked with that effortless kind of poise that made even the security turn and blink.

Beside her, Anastasia was pure trouble in thigh-high boots, a vintage oversized Red Bull windbreaker hanging off her shoulder like she’d owned the team for years. She was chewing gum. Slowly. Boldly. And pretending not to notice the F1 drivers doing double takes as they passed.

“Subtle,” Maxine muttered under her breath.

“I’m not here to be subtle,” Anastasia grinned, adjusting her sunglasses. “I’m here to cause a little concern.”

The sisters had been invited — a quiet personal invite after the Red Bull energy drink story incident had sparked absolute chaos online, thanks to Anastasia tweeting:

“My favorite Max is whoever kisses the other Max first.”

Which, naturally, went viral in 42 countries.

Inside the Red Bull suite, Max Verstappen stood by a monitor, post-FP1, a towel draped around his neck, still half in his suit.

He was mid-sip of water when the footage came through.

Two women walking through the paddock gates.

One wearing his name.

One tweeting that tweet.

Both of them walking like they didn’t have a single fear in the world.

He nearly choked.

“No way. They're here?” he asked quietly.

Alex, standing beside him and already scrolling through Twitter, didn’t even look up. “Yup. And the internet’s already losing its mind. You should probably go say hi before the memes do it for you.”

They met outside the hospitality entrance — it wasn’t dramatic, wasn’t staged, just one of those perfect moments where everything aligned.

Maxine had stopped to look at one of the Red Bull display cars raising a brow at her sister as she made some stupid excuse up to 'go help someone I think they fell' and wandered into The McLaren Hospitality. Shaking her head at her hour younger sisters antics, she turned back to the display. A soft breeze caught her blouse, and she turned her head just slightly — just enough for Max to see her properly.

He froze for the smallest second.

She looked… like her music.

Soft and bold. Polished but wild. Dangerous in a way that felt almost poetic.

She noticed him first — of course she did — her gaze flicked to him, measured, steady.

Then her lips pulled into a smile.

“You must be the other Max,” she said as he approached, offering her hand like they were at a diplomatic summit instead of a Grand Prix.

Max’s smile came slow. “You’ve been stealing my name,” he replied, taking her hand. “I figured it was time I took it back.”

Photographers, who’d been keeping a respectful distance, surged closer at the contact. The two Maxes didn’t even flinch.

They turned toward the cameras like pros.

Max’s arm slid around her waist — a smooth, practiced move — and Maxine tilted her head just slightly toward him, lips parted in a soft grin.

Click. Click. Click.

It was over in seconds.

But the internet? Dead. Absolutely dead.

...

Liked by anastasiaagain, lando, pierregasly and 1.2M others

maxinethemachine "Double trouble. 🥤🏁 #MADMAX²"

Tagged: @/maxverstappen

landono: l was there. it was hot.

spotify: Streaming all of Maxine’s discography while crying over this.

netflix: Drive to Survive just changed genres.

fentybeauty: Maxine what gloss is that please we’re begging

Liked by maxinethemachine, carlossainz55 and 1.3M others.

maxverstappen I guess we can share the name

Tagged: @/maxinethemachine

redbullracing: Can we make this a team partnership or what?

F1: We’re just watching at this point 😭

haasf1team: Honestly we’re rooting for them.

dior: Icons.

...

Qualifying was over. The crowd was dispersing, and golden hour was bleeding slow light across the paddock, soaking it in this kind of honey-drenched stillness.

Max had finished P2 — not quite pole, but close. He still had adrenaline in his veins, heat in his skin from the run, and his fireproofs rolled down to his waist. The top half of his race suit hung loose, sleeves tied around his hips, Red Bull logo stark across his chest.

He wasn’t looking for anyone, not really.

But he found her.

Maxine.

She was behind the garage, past the barricades, where the crowd thinned and the air turned quiet. Her lanyard still swung from her neck, half-tucked under a leather jacket. She’d slipped out of the noise and was leaned against the wall, holding a bottle of water, head tilted up toward the fading sun like she was trying to memorize the shape of it.

He stopped a few steps away.

“You hiding from fans?” he asked, voice a little hoarse from the comms shouting.

Maxine turned to him, and for a second, she didn’t speak. Just smiled, slow and knowing.

“Something like that,” she said.

“You missed a good quali,” he said, and she raised an eyebrow.

“I didn’t miss it,” she said, holding up her phone and tilting the screen toward him. A livestream, paused on his second lap. “I watched. You almost had him.”

Max huffed a short laugh, scratching the back of his neck. “Yeah. Almost.”

“You’re still the crowd favorite,” she said.

He leaned against the wall beside her, a little closer than polite, but not quite touching. He could smell whatever perfume she wore — expensive and addictive and edged with something sharp.

“You talk like you’re not part of the crowd,” he said.

She looked at him again, really looked this time.

“I’m not,” Maxine said. “I’m just visiting your world.”

He didn’t know what to say to that. Not right away.

The silence wasn’t uncomfortable. It was charged — like the echo of a good song in a stadium after the lights come back on. The kind you don’t want to end.

She broke it first.

“I saw the memes,” she said, biting back a smile. “About Mad Max.”

“You started half of them,” Max said, deadpan.

“Anastasia started them,” Maxine corrected, smug. “I just gave the people what they wanted.”

He smirked, looking sideways at her. “You’re dangerous.”

She shrugged. “You’re fast.”

A beat.

“Ever driven anything with more than two wheels?” he teased.

“I’ve crashed a jet ski,” she said. “Does that count?”

He snorted, leaning his head back against the wall. “Not even a little bit.”

Another silence. This one softer.

“I get it now,” she said suddenly.

He looked at her. “Get what?”

“You,” she said. “All of this. The obsession. Why people worship you.”

Max frowned slightly. “Worship’s a strong word.”

“You’re very humble for someone who gets screamed at by thousands every weekend,” she said.

He looked down for a moment, then up again.

“I don’t care about the screaming,” Max said, voice lower now, more honest. “I care about the racing. That’s the part that matters.”

Maxine nodded slowly.

“I respect that,” she said, quiet.

Another long beat.

He turned toward her fully then, his shoulder brushing hers just slightly. She didn’t move.

“You’re not what I expected,” he said.

Maxine raised an eyebrow, playful again. “What were you expecting?”

He considered her. “Less real.”

She blinked.

For a second, her wall cracked just a bit — not broken, just enough for him to see through.

Then she smiled again. A softer one.

“I get that a lot,” she said.

Their eyes lingered. Neither of them moved. The sun dipped lower. Somewhere far behind them, the sounds of packing up the paddock grew louder.

But here — in this little slip of light, in this quiet corner of the chaos — time held its breath.

“I should go find my sister,” Maxine said eventually, standing up straighter.

“She’s probably still trolling me online,” Max replied, lips twitching.

“She’s very good at that,” Maxine said. “Be careful.”

He tilted his head. “And what about you?”

“What about me?”

“Should I be careful?”

She didn’t answer right away.

Instead, she leaned in, brushed past him — close enough that her shoulder grazed his chest. Her voice near his ear, low and velvet.

“You’d like it too much if I said yes.”

And then she walked away.

Leaving him grinning like an idiot in the soft golden light, heart a little louder than before.

Taglist, comment to be added;

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Make sure you can be tagged!

[sunnytoptap]

[cheaploafs]

locked in and immediately started crying

[idon-twannabeperceived]

My. Class. Won't. Start. And it's been aFUCKING HOUR

[kindaorangey]

up to date on miraculous now yippee!!! nice to know that everyone calling this show garbage bcuz the bible leaks said something they disagreed with (that we haven't even seen play out onscreen yet) were wrong, as always. the skies are blue and i will see adrien discover his father was hawk moth and a subsequent adrinette breakup in my lifetime

[squeakyleftsneaker]

Watching Voltron for the 1st Time: S7 Ep 1

HEY HI HELLO THIS IS THE LORE. Or, if you don't wanna read allat, hi, I'm Shoe, I tutor kids and one of them recommended this show. She got so excited both times I told her I was watching that now I simply can't STOP, and also I'm invested in this clusterfuck. Way, way too invested in this clusterfuck. Do I think it's good? No. Do I still find myself drawn to how garbage it is? VERY MUCH SO.

A Minute Slay

YOUNG SHIRO AND MINI KEITH AND SHIRO BELIEVES IN HIM BRO I'M SICK

AND LIL HOMIE GAYASS STOLE HIS CAR AMAZING Shiro looked at this feral little creature and said "I can fix him" WOWEE IT'S LIKE KEITH LOOKIN AT THAT CLONE AND GOING "I can fix him" BEAUTIFUL PARALLELS HERE

GIGGLING AND KICKING MY FEET UP KEITH'S HOT MOM IS ON SCREEN and the cute lil dog omfg

Waiter, waiter, I need more Romelle and Allura bonding please

Shiro's student teacher gig is thankless and soul crushing which is true of being a student teacher in any capacity (I am not anymore. I just tutor now) (also yes all high schoolers are That Annoying)

GAHHHHH THE PARALLELS BETWEEN WHAT SHIRO DOES FOR KEITH AS A BABY FRESHMAN (ish?) AND WHAT KEITH DOES FOR SHIRO IN THE SHOW FUCKIGN FINALLY WE GET THE LORE also I'm so fr when these writers remember to care they cook. THE HOVERCRAFTS TOO????

HE'S CHRONICALLY ILL AND GAY AND A STUDENT TEACHER THIS IS ME BUT BETTER AND BUFFER AND A MAN

I love his bitchy ex-boyfriend. And MAN what a beautiful comparison between his boyfriend and his bosses and presumably other loved ones trying to keep him down and hold him to earth and then his connection to Keith and how they both just want to see the damn stars.

"Keith? You saved me."/"We saved each other" MY HEART MAN THE ONLY EMOTIONAL CORE TO THIS FUCKING STORY but when they do it right they do it right.

Thanks, I Hate It

We're devoting half of this otherwise exceedingly valuable episode to them fucking around in a small scale WE COULD BE GETTING MORE LORE

I have object permanence showrunners I'm not going to forget these characters exist if I don't see them for one episode. Though I can understand why you would think that BECAUSE YOU HAVEN'T GIVEN THE CHARACTERS ANY CHARACTER AT ALL

I can't man the tonal juxtaposition is just jarring like we've got a really beautiful origin story for the only interpersonal relationship that exists in this fucking show in all of its stupidity and then we've got this "They shrank haha it's alice in wonderland but make it space" ass story I can't do this bro I really can't

This was NOT NECESSARY AT ALL OMFG

MANY THOUGHTS ABOUT AMBIGUOUS PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS BELOW BRACE YOURSELVES I'VE BEEN SAVING THEM FOR THE WHOLE TIME I'VE BEEN WATCHING THIS SHOWE

Kay so did these writers INTEND for Shiro to be the buffer hotter nicer and objectively, measurably better male version of me? Obviously not they do not know who tf I am. But I am happy about it. Anyway I love his relationship with Keith, if I were to rewrite this show with a less ensemble focus... I would still make it all about Allura 9/10 times (and she would be a space lesbian 7 of those times) BUT I promise 1/10 of those times would be about Keith and Shiro.

I am a hoe for shifting interpersonal dynamics, I am a hoe for bringing two people to level footing after they spend their whole lives on one or the other (Shiro being the only one there for Keith and really the only sort of authority figure, then Keith being the only one there to always support Shiro and keeps saving him again and again, and now they're both sort of in a position where that has all changed and they're on level ground)

Beautifully done, I love the depth and complexity there, the acting and animation for it was beautiful. I like that they're not... like a sibling dynamic, for lack of a better term. Sibling dynamics in fiction especially tend to be pretty constant and the ultimate power dynamic doesn't change so much. See Succession in television, see Avatar the Last Airbender, see the girls in Little Women even! Though they grow and change and evolve as characters, the relationship they fall into is pretty consistent throughout.

Keith and Shiro have a bit more depth and complexity than that, which I personally really appreciate. I love a complex, somewhat ambiguous, yet incredibly intense personal connection. It brings a lot more out of both parties as characters, it requires a lot more from them in the story and I think it is harder to do well as writers!

It's family. In whatever sense you want to read it. And things change and people change and the standing they have relative to each other will change but the fundamental constant of their relationship is not the dynamic but instead the two equal parties to its depth and intensity.

As I believe I've established before, I'm not a big shipping person. I also think that what is already there in text is more than enough for me to really enjoy this personal relationship. They're Keith and Shiro and that is Enough for me. Because the writers actually developed this and its significance and it has strong bearing on the direction of the story and they are BOTH fulfilled as characters through it. Beautiful stuff. And there's still segments where I think they're both limited and the writers don't quite know what to do with them (disappearing Keith so that Shiro could lead rather than playing off of the tensions between them there, not quite letting Shiro know there's something wrong, there's a lot a good writer could do there), but ultimately. What's there is beautiful and well done.

Now if only the show had managed to hit upon that for. I don't know. EVERY FUCKING OTHER CHARACTER IN THIS SHOW FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. THERE'S 7 CHARACTERS, 6 IF YOU WANT CORAN TO BE JUST COMIC RELIEF. YOU HAVE SOOOOOO MANY RELATIONSHIPS TO PLAY WITH HOW DID YOU ONLY MANAGE TO WRITE ONE OF THESE WITH ANY DEPTH OR COMPLEXITY

UGH

I'M MAD.

IF THEY'D WANTED TO DO ANY ROMANTIC STUFF TOO THEY COULDA WITH ANY OF THE PALADINS I SAID AS MUCH AGESSSSSS AND AGES AND AGES AGO AND INSTEAD THEY'RE SHRINKING ALLURA DOWN INTO A MICROSCOPIC BOX TO BE WITH LANCE AND THEY'RE BORINGIFYING LANCE SO THAT HE'S NOT WEIRD ABOUT ALLURA ANYMORE INSTEAD OF MAKING HIM ADDRESS AND FIX THAT BEHAVIOR WHILE STAYING HIMSELF. LANCE AND ALLURA COULD WORK WITHIN THE CONFINES OF CANON IF THEY INTERACTED IF THEY HAD DEPTH OR COMPLEXITY IN THEIR INTERACTIONS

I'M TRYING TO WORK WITH WHAT EXISTS IN THE TEXT. I LIKE WHAT EXISTS IN THE TEXT INSOFAR AS IT APPLIES TO ONE SINGULAR INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIP. WHAT IF THEY COULD DO THAT FOR LANCE AND ALLURA TOO? THEY CLEARLY HAVE THE CAPACITY ON SOME LEVEL! LET ALLURA HAVE THE RED LION, LET LANCE BE HER SUPPORT AND SOMEONE MORE GROUNDED

HE IS THE AUDIENCE WE ARE LANCE LET HIM BE A LITTLE AFRAID OF HER, LET THERE BE TENSIONS WITH LOTOR. THERE IS A VERY COMPELLING STORY THERE THAT THEY FUMBLED HARD BECAUSE THEY COULDN'T FIGURE OUT A WAY FOR ALLURA TO BE INTERESTED IN LANCE WITHOUT DUMBING HER DOWN BECAUSE THEY DIDN'T WRITE LANCE TO HAVE ANY FUCKING DEPTH! THEY KEPT FORGETTING ABOUT HIM SO HARD THAT NOW HE'S JUST BORING!

IDEK WHERE THEY'RE TRYING TO GO WITH KEITH AND THE BLUE GIRLIE WHOSE NAME I CAN'T REMEMBER LIKE WHAT IS THE PLAN THERE THEY'VE TRIED TO MAKE SOMETHING OUT OF NOTHING AND THEY CAN'T

BUT NONE OF THE PALADINS SHOULD GET TOGETHER BECAUSE THEY STILL SEEM LIKE FUCKIGN STRANGERSSSSSS

Anyway

Headloss interlude momentarily over, the only writing thing I look forward to while watching this show is seeing where the writers take Keith and Shiro next as a dynamic. I always look forward to the animation (it's gorgeous), always look forward to being surprised by some silly little bit of humor that delights me, but insofar as an element of the show where the writing is strong? Keith and Shiro's interactions take the cake and there's no other competitors.

Just really fantastic stuff in this episode

Ofc sandwiched by a layer of mediocre nonsense that really didn't need to be there because what are we, an actually good show? Can't have anyone thinking that! Guys I am so serious I'm half expecting that instead of now letting Shiro get to save Keith a few times, instead of showing them just having that sort of unspoken partnership, they're just never going to interact again after the backstory episode.

Anyway I really like Adam he's a bitch and I love a bitchy ex boyfriend always. I love him. I think he and Keith should interact. I really do. I think they would be haters of each other and I love it. Me and my ride or die have a policy about each other's exes so I fully expect Keith to bring the shovel and not the talk. Cannot wait for the epic reunion tour.

[altarfates]

hoping and praying that they do a med review for me this week and i can actually sleep for more than four hours again it's been two weeks i am actively perishing.

[outrageousbirb]

tried to explain to my mother that while we both experience a similar level of Catastrophic General Depression (as in going to sleep every day hoping you wont wake up for over a decade), part of why im struggling so much at my current stage of life while she managed to find things to occupy herself is due to the difference in our situations.

I'm 26, and by this time my mother was married to her boss (an older man with an established life + experience she could glom onto) and employed by him at the only job she had ever had, where she was secure insofar as she couldnt be fired without divorce, and couldnt be divorced without being fired (small family retail) so she had managed to, in one "vector" of her life, secure herself both employment and a Life Buddy.

meanwhile, at this point in my life, i have made my peace with the fact that i am extremely unlikely to find a Life Buddy of any kind (romantic, sexual, otherwise) as i am asexual + other issues, and all of my friends are going to pair up and go off to have the more stereotypical future involving kids etc, which means i will never be anyone's Priority Person, bc at best i will be in 3rd place or lower. I have also made my peace with the fact that i cannot manage to function living alone or living with roommates, and that my odds of coping with employment are similarly low, due to the Everything about me.

so while my mother and i are in similar mindsets at similar life stages, in terms of viable options, we are worlds apart. i cannot think of anything i want for my future other than not to have one. i can think of things i do not want, but what do you do when you do not want ANYTHING? i would steer in a favoured direction if i fucking had one, instead of simply spinning in circles.

the only thing i want is something i fundamentally cannot have, so theres no point in wanting that. everything else sounds like hell. which path do i take if they all end in failure?

my mother's advice is to start doing things, make an effort, go after your interests, try new things, explore opportunities, as if i havent tried that before. as if im capable of doing that without support. as if needing the support wont hurt her or my father. as if i wont feel guilty over selfishly taking up time and resources doing something stupid for no good reason and i wont disappoint them when after all the effort and time and money spent results in fucking nothing. as if i dont fucking try already. i have plenty of "interests" that bore me to tears, and im too fucked up for social interests that might be more helpful.

i cant bear the weight of trying any longer. every failure adds up to yet another stone upon my back and im not atlas, i cannot hold the weight of the world. i am so tired. i just want to rest without the daily drudgery of life dragging like a noose around my neck at all times.

[rain-is-cool]

bro i saw a whole TWO bagina edits on tiktok today. im eating good 🙏🙏🙏

[cosmicnovaflare]

a mix of Thai/Japanese/Chinese traditional clothing would look so cute in Cinder. The draped piece with sequins and embroidery from Thai dresses would look so pretty with Lunar details and moons and stars. actually all of these would look pretty on her with details of Luna

Yes, I love the concept! Thai/Cambodian clothing was the first thought I had when imagining non-aristocratic sectors of Luna before Wires and Nerve came out. Or even for some of the higher nobility that don’t participate in the aristocracy at all. I’d still imagine the palace with Nagara temple-style architecture (because Cypress Blackburn has a god complex and all) too if it weren’t for the beautiful art they had in Fairest (though Wires and Nerve ignored that too) but at least we can still speculate on the inner decorum. Hindu and Gaelic inspired interiors could still fit even if we include Wires and Nerve.

But yeah, now I want to focus a lot on what Lunar clothing could look like. Wouldn’t it be cool if tons of unique attire evolved over time throughout sectors outside of the capital? I won’t speculate on Artemisia too much since the nobles have and will take, appropriate, and throw away anything in the name of beauty, but what if there was a mining sector with traditions similar to Miao Silver? As Artemisia doesn’t seem to have a lack of anorthite, or compounds mixed with anorthite, perhaps this may be a tradition in one of the outer sectors.

If it takes place in a mining sector, imagine hair pieces, earrings, necklaces, pins, aglets, etc. made of Lunar Anorthosite that can be passed down throughout families. Not only would it look beautiful, but could you imagine the folklore behind it? Marissa didn’t drill in just how symbolic it is to have the royal crown be made of crystalline anorthosite. Anorthosite, the Genesis Rock. Rare on Earth, and likely the mineral that surrounds the outer walls of Artemisia Palace. The rock that was the final key to piecing together the formation of a celestial object 1/80th the size of the Earth, the rock that explained the evolution of the moon, and the first thing the majority of people think of when talking about the Apollo 15 mission!

If it is still unlikely that a mining sector would be allowed to keep any anorthosite, then maybe let’s speculate on regolith solidified by impact shockwaves. The dark grey/black would have a bold contrast with much of the building stone in the Capital. Maybe this could be a tradition in a sector that uses electrolysis to mine oxygen or water, a sector that uses fusion with helium 3, or even ra sector that explores the terrain outside of the domes that simply finds this regolith in areas with high meteor impacts.

[silviakundera]

Haha I also used the dickless bore. I thought that only the two main characters came back didn't know he did as well. I still don't buy him ever being into her but that's just me I do wonder if he's going to try and kill her again. I do think Li Rong is treating him too well for my liking she should at least treat hit similarly or worse than she treated ML I want to see wet paper towel non stop suffer.

on one hand, imo a SRQ who is heartless doesn't work for the story the writer is trying to share with us. On the other hand, it's totally ok to decide to be a full-time hater towards a minor character, just because it's fun. I support haters! 🎉 \o/ 🎉

One thing that I think is relevant when comparing LR's reactions: if PWX had killed her, the motive would have been as part of his mission to have his childhood love Qin Zhenzhen's son become the next emperor. (Remember, he came over to threaten her life over that right before she died and called his ex Zhenzhen lmao) THE AUDACITY. In contrast, LR is viewing her murder at SRQ's hands as part of the revenge plan for the Su family's execution.

Some passages of Li Rong's POV:

After a few moments, she whispered: “Where did the scent on you come from?”

“If I say it, you might be upset.” Pei Wenxuan’s eyes had a hint of gloating at others’ pain.

Li Rong thought for a while and frowned, “Su Rongqing?”

“Yes.”

...Li Rong said nothing. She blankly stared into the fire.

Pei Wenxuan turned the fish over and looked at her with a smile, seemingly quite happy. Li Rong found that he had a fearless, unabashed look of enjoying a good play and couldn’t help but be a little fazed.

She believed everything Pei Wenxuan said.

---

Su Rongqing was someone that she saved with her own hands.

That year, Prince Su rebelled, and Su Rongqing’s elder brother spoke up for Prince Su. Later on, he was falsely accused of colluding with Prince Su, implicating the Su clan with treason.

At that time, Li Chuan was so furious that he fainted. He put the entire Su clan in prison without going through the Joint Trial of Three Divisions first and put the men to death and the women into exile. She disagreed with this decision and rushed to beg Li Chuan before the Su clan received their sentence. After being subjected to ten planks, with Pei Wenxuan’s intervention, she was finally able to ask for amnesty for the Su clan.

Even if the death sentences can be forgone, it was impossible to escape punishment while still alive. Even though the men of the Su clan could live, they would be subjected to castration. The others couldn’t bear the humiliation, so they all committed suicide in prison. When she arrived, there was only one man “desperate for life and afraid of death” left among the men of the Su clan, Su Rongqing.

At that time, she had told Su Rongqing that she saved him without the intention of asking him to repay her. She could give him silver and a position, so that he could continue to live a good life in the future.

Back then, she didn’t have any special feelings towards Su Rongqing. It was just that he had saved her before, so after he took care of her, bit by bit, she felt grateful, and…vague sentiments towards him.

For the most part, she sought to save the Su clan for Li Chuan and her own conscience. The Su clan was a prominent, noble family. It was difficult for her to sit back and watch if they died in such an ambiguous manner.

At that time, Su Rongqing refused to go.

...It wasn’t that she had never thought that Su Rongqing would not take revenge on her. After all, it was Li Chuan who ordered all the men of the Su clan to be beheaded and exiled all the female family members. It was impossible for anyone to forget this blood feud, let alone the formerly first and most outstanding gongzi of that year?

For so many years, she had never dared to give him real authority, observing him and guarding against him while still trying to help him live a better life. She couldn’t actually kill him because of her own conscience, but she couldn’t actually trust him and give him power.

In the end, he still decided to act. He killed her first, then successfully took her authority in the name of eliminating Pei Wenxuan. If she guessed correctly, he would not leave with the advisors. Instead, he would borrow the excuse of taking revenge for her and enforcing the will of the people to join forces with the Empress, assist Li Xin in ascension, and fight to the death against the remnants of Pei Wenxuan’s faction.

...

She had anticipated this possibility from the moment she took Su Rongqing in, but she couldn’t help feeling a bit regretful when it actually happened.

[kidspawn]

trying to remember how it felt during a particularly aggressive bout of insomnia (writing purposes), but the issue is that when you don't sleep for five days you cannot form long-term memories of what happened when you didn't sleep for five days.

[sapphire-weapon]

lmao today

>wake up to a shitty anon asking if I'm a "sionist"

>leave early for work because there's an accident on the highway. a second accident happens during my drive, making me late anyway

>placed at the box office, which I've come to resent, when I just want to do the job I was actually hired for

>get hit with constant shitty passive aggression from one of the actual box office ladies

>drop and shatter vape tank, have to go out and spend money that I didn't want to in order to replace the part

>get a ticket for a rolling stop on the way home

I'm going to start screaming, and I don't know when or if I'm going to stop.

[sparklingdwarf]

.

[oldcurse]

Having a relapse moment

[robinsnest2111]

still hung up on the sum of all these stupid mistakes (once again somehow messing up calling in sick which led to logistical and staffing issues and just a whole damn mess in general, the failed joke making it seem like i hate my boss/job) having almost cost me my job tbh. that was the biggest kicker.

like yeah I wouldn't have been out of employment instantly BUT if people were more strict I would've gotten an official warning letter for this current bunch of mistakes. which could be the first step to losing my job if i keep messing up. like. a tangible thing. a letter. black on white.

(also the way this discussion was started. "just wanted to ask: do you like working this job?" me, not sensing anything wrong answer yes. and then "doesn't seem that way to me because reason xyz" and I get it I totally get it!!!!! i get how all of this combined can come across as a total asshole move from an outside perspective!!!! I should know better I should do better. I am an adult human being of 28 years after all. I'm fully grown. but. there's so much I still have to learn and experience for the first time at 28 because in my childhood and teen years I was too busy getting bullied by peers for being weird, getting punished by my parents for being mentally ill and having annoying symptoms and not being normal or functional and making their life hell and disappointing them, and constantly thinking about killing myself to properly socialise and learn conflict navigation/resolution skills and so many other crucial things that a normal 28 year old should know....

I feel so stupid and underequipped and just not fit for society. you know nothing you stupid little thing