#I always hated izzy but now??? yeah I love him

[thatludicrousdisplay]

nah s2 has truly turned me into an izzy hands apologist

[just-spacetrash]

🏴‍☠️

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

Okay, so, there's one thing that I'm kind of tired of beating around the bush with white fans about, and it's this: if you pretend to "ignore" race in OFMD, you will miss a lot of what the story is trying to tell you.

Now, I do not truly believe that race is something you can ignore in a story. I just don't think it's possible, and when you try, what you wind up with is something like the conservative worldview of "not seeing color." Trying to ignore race will make you sound racist and ignore important racialized themes.

You can't understand Stede's need for character growth at the beginning of the show if you just focus on how he's "cringe" instead. When Stede makes his crew members of color serve them at dinner when the English board, this is gross, and their faces tell us exactly how they feel about it. Stede unlearning his biases here isn't subtle (guy who called him and Pete "fucking racists" I love you forever), and learning to take all of his crew members seriously as fully actualized people, moving away from the sort of Kindergarten-teacher behavior at the start to truly valuing them as people and taking their input and suggestions, it's an important aspect. Stede asking Abshir for intel at the party isn't just funny, it's also proof he's learned to see value in people in positions like Abshir's.

You can't understand the motivations behind Ed's actions, especially the violent ones, if you ignore the racist overtones. Ed is not a randomly violent person - he gets angry at a captain for calling him a "rich donkey," and if you think it's unreasonable for a brown man to want to get revenge on a white man for calling him that? Then fuck I'm glad you can't see the conversations I have with my other black friends, man. Ed's anger and frustration at the party aren't just because he fucked up with some spoons, lol, you can't get it unless you realize he's the only brown guest in that room. Yeah, he's ignoring Stede's advice, but he's immediately under a pressure Stede never has been. Ed's wanted posters in s2, too, rely on heavily caricaturizing Jewish features to make him look grotesque and monstruous. We're supposed to be horrified by that aspect.

And, yeah, when we ignore the racist tones to Izzy's behavior, I think that's undermining an important aspect of who he is as an antagonistic character. Him buying Ed from the English should feel like a gross violation, because it is. When he sits in front of the crew eating and making Fang and Ivan serve him, I think it's a pretty obvious parallel to how the crew members of color were similarly insulted in the pilot. It's impossible to ignore race in the way he dehumanizes Ed and tries to force him back into a caricature of behavior he hates and is horrified by - when he calls Ed a "wild dog" in s2, if that doesn't cause a visceral reaction of disgust in you, I dunno what to tell you. This doesn't mean that Izzy is irredeemable - just as Stede wasn't - but it does mean that racist biases are things Izzy had to unlearn.

OFMD so often takes so much care with how its characters of color are depicted. We get thoughtful, relatable moments (those French boat people getting humiliated and setting their boat on fire after they'd tried to touch Ed's beard is so satisfying, guys) and excellent, supportive friendships between men of color. The characters of color on OFMD are clean, smart, respected, and it's wonderful. And just because these things aren't always relatable to you specifically doesn't mean they're not important parts of the story.

[izzyy-stuff]

𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐎𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐎𝐃 - 𝐎𝐓𝟓

bf!txt x afab!reader

in which the txt members take care of you while you are on your period

wc 250-350 per member, 1.4k in total

warnings menstruation duh, cramps, established relationship, pet names, I try to not state which products are used most of the time but in Taehyun's reader uses pads

↪ izzy speaks... yes, I am on my period writing this and I hate it so I need myself someone like them

CHOI SOOBIN

he always tries to make your pain go away by staying close. You feel like just lying in bed because you're tired or in pain? cuddles. Your cramps are bad? He is your personal heater.

He will ALWAYS make sure you have everything you need

you need another blanket? It's already beside you. Craving your favorite snacks? He bought everything earlier that day.

When you first started dating he was PANICKING

Obviously, he knew menstruation was a thing but he never really needed to care until he got together with you

After the first time you got your period while staying over at his he started asking questions

How bad does it hurt? How often do you get it? What does ovulation have to do with anything?

And then he sat in silence the whole afternoon, just listening to your explanation and taking mental notes

“It's alright, Soobie. I am feeling a lot better now,” you assured him, watching him from the comfort of his bed. “Are you sure though? I can make you a cup of tea? Or maybe we can watch a film together?” He suggested, making you chuckle as you reached your hand to him. Your boyfriend smiled too, holding your hand as he stepped closer. “All I need is for you to lay beside me, yeah?” Soobin nodded, climbing onto the bed. His arms wrapped around your waist, his palm resting on your lower stomach. “I love you,” he whispered against the crouch of your neck, placing soft kisses in the same spot. Your lips curved into a smile again, your hand resting on his. “I love you too, Soob.”

CHOI YEONJUN

he definitely knows your cycle by heart

he even has the same app you use to keep track of your period on his phone so he is prepared

His bathroom is STACKED with all the products you could possibly want to use

even though he knows your preferences, he likes to have other opinions ready in case you ever change your mind and want to use something new

He also has a few pads/tampons in his bag in case you would need any when you two are out

does literally anything you ask him for

He WILL run to the store to get you your favorite ice cream if you run out of the one you had at home

He likes to stay home with you when your period starts. No matter if you two spend the day lying in bed, watching a movie while eating ice cream, or if you want to clean the whole house, whatever it is, he will stay by your side

“I am going to run to the store real quick, I’ll be right back,” Yeonjun smiled as you finished your lunch. “Oh, really?” You looked up at him immediately, and he could swear he saw sparks in your eyes. “Can you get me-” “Some chocolate and fruits? I am on it,” he interrupted you, nodding. “If you need any pills while I am gone they are in the bathroom, yeah?” He reminded you as if you hadn’t been in his bathroom, looking for the same pills many times before. “I know,” you smiled back at him, standing up from the dining table. “Thank you,” you whispered, walking over to him and placing a kiss on his cheek. “For everything.” His smile grew even wider, stealing a kiss from you when you stepped back again, his hand on your hips. “No need, darling.”

CHOI BEOMGYU

He definitely says something like "Well, you know, I could take it away from you for nine months" when your period starts just to tease you

but when he sees you glare at him, lying in your bed in pain, he shuts up immediately

“Okay, I am just going to shut up now and run you a bath, yeah?”

Continuously asks you if you are okay or need anything, to the point it gets annoying

But he simply means the best and just wants to make sure you are doing fine because no matter how much he teases you, he loves you

He always tries to make you laugh and make you think about different things

He always makes sure you have enough water to drink,

Extra: you definitely made him try the period pain simulator just so he could see what you go through every month and after that, he had never even tried to tease you about your period

You sat on a chair in your boyfriend’s bathroom, in your pajamas now, your eyes closed as you finally relaxed. “Are you feeling any better?” Beomgyu asked, drying your hair. “A lot,” you hummed with a nod. “Thank you, Beom.” 

He shook his head, turning the hair dryer in his hands off. “I didn’t do anything,” he disagreed. Sure, he had run you a bath and helped you wash your hair, but every boyfriend did that, right? “I am just glad the shower helped. Do you still want me to give you some painkillers?” You opened your eyes again with a nod, “Yes, please.” He smiled, nodding back. “I'll be right back then.”

KANG TAEHYUN

Man studied for this day

I feel like similarly to Yeonjun, he is always prepared and knows everything he needs in advance

feels no shame in buying you products and doesn't mind doing so every month

surprises you with your favorite food and flowers to bring up your mood

he normally cooks meals for you, but during your period he is extra careful not to miss a single meal, no matter how busy he is

If you are free, he always asks you to visit him at work so you don't have to be home alone

completely understands if you don't want to join him in the gym or do any sports in general during your period

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” you panicked, covering your head in embarrassment. How could you just forget you were supposed to get your period today? The gym was the worst possible place it could show up too. Your panties covered with blood, with no sign of any sanitary products in your local gym’s bathroom wasn't the ideal situation. “Love, are you okay?” You heard your boyfriend’s voice behind the door, your eyes widening. “No,” you admitted. “I got it. Oh god, how could I be so stupid and not notice?” 

“Come on, you are not stupid. I should have some pads in my bag, I’ll be right back, yeah?” You sighed in relief. You had an amazing boyfriend, you reminded yourself once again. 

It didn’t take much longer for him to come back, knocking on your door before he opened them slightly, passing you the pad with his fresh pair of boxers he had for after the gym through the gap. “Thank you,” you mumbled, embarrassed. No matter how many times you had gotten your period, it always somehow felt embarrassing. “No need to thank me. I’ll be waiting outside, we can go home and have your favorite meal, what do you think?”

Before you could answer him, you heard a female scream, kicking your boyfriend out of the bathroom. Right, this was the women’s toilet, you remembered, a chuckle escaping your lips. 

HUENING KAI

Since he has two sisters I hope no one is surprised he KNOWS what to do

He notices every shift in your behavior

every turn you make in your bed, every frown you make from the pain, every change in your eyes. He sees it all and always knows exactly what you need, often before even you do. Before you can register your sudden cravings, he is already bringing you the exact snack you had in mind

he always lets you wear his clothes, but especially when you are on your period

He knows you feel comfortable and calm in his things so once you are on your period he gives you every piece of garment he owns to make you feel exactly that: comfortable and calm

“I wish I could go through it instead, I hate seeing you in pain,” type of guy

Just like Soobin, he always keeps you close, being your personal heater

cuddles, cuddles, and cuddles

“Come here,” Kai encouraged you, moving his gaming chair back so you could sit on his lap more easily. You smiled, walking over to him. You wrapped your arms around his waist as you rested your head on his shoulder, closing your eyes.

He caressed your back while he waited for his game to load, placing kisses on your neck. “Did the painkillers work?” You hummed a quiet “Not yet,” taking a peek at him. “Should I tell Soobin I have to go?” Kai wondered, not bothering to hide the sadness in his voice. You knew he felt sorry for you, but there was not much he could do about your cramps. “It’s fine,” you shook your head. “Keep playing, I am comfortable like this.” Your boyfriend gave your neck one last peck before moving his chair forward again, doing his best to focus on the game on his screen. Still, he couldn’t help it and constantly glanced at you, making sure you were doing okay.

⋆✶ izzy's tags @beomiracles @seoulzie @adel222 @inkigayocamman @flowzel @love-be0m @virgo-and-libra @hwanghyunjinismybae ✶⋆ want to get notified? join taglist here!

[berzahoes]

you and me | izzy stradlin

summary: no matter what axl told him, izzy could never stop loving you.

an: it’s about time i wrote something for my man izzy <3 not an exact timeline of how things actually went but hey, that’s fanfiction for ya!

warnings: axl rose that should always be a warning

the moment izzy saw you, he swore he was in love. at the time, you were both in high school. he had long hair and beat up shoes that were years old. on the other hand, you were the nicest clothes and shoes while your hair was perfectly cut and brushed. he noticed that you always wore a locket, maybe a family member had given it to you as a present.

you were known as the nicest girl in school. nobody had anything bad to say about you until a certain lead singer saw how in love his friend was with you.

“she’s a prude. why waste your time on her?”

izzy would immediately defend you. “you don’t know her. stop saying shit if you don’t know her.”

it was after your high school graduation that you and izzy began to talk. your family had thrown you a party. as you were helping your mom bring in decorations from her car, izzy just so happened to walk by since your houses were close to each other. you noticed him and waved for him to come over. he couldn’t believe that the most popular girl from high school was about to talk to him.

“hi, jeffrey.” you said in your sweet voice that izzy loved.

“you know my name?” he asked.

“well, yeah. we went to the same elementary school. remember mrs. smith? she wore those big glasses?” you said.

“i remember now and i remember you doing a project about the ocean and you said your favorite animal was a betta fish and some kid made fun of you for liking a fish.” he realized how much information he remembered. was it normal to remember all that? he probably looked like a creep—

“it still is. it’s a pretty fish.”

izzy only nodded.

“do you want to come over later? i’m having a graduation party and i would love for you to come.”

“yeah, thanks. maybe i’ll drop by. i’ve been busy with my band.”

“you’re in a band? that’s cool! what kind of music do you play?”

izzy wished he didn’t even the band, but at the same time, he wanted to share what he loved with you. “it’s just a . . band. you know, rock, we play that.”

“cool, maybe i can come see you guys perform?” you questioned.

“if you don’t mind sitting on a old couch in a garage.” he joked.

“every band starts somewhere, jeff.”

“izzy, i go by izzy.” he was nervous about what you thought about his name. did you like it? did you hate it so much that it made you not want to talk to him ever again?

“well, izzy, i still mean what i said.”

during the party, you introduced izzy to your parents. izzy thought it was a bad idea since most parents took one look at him and instantly thought he looked like trouble. but your parents weren’t that type.

“mom, dad, this is izzy. we went to the same elementary school. he graduated too.” you said as izzy shook hands with your parents.

“nice to meet you, izzy. congratulations on your graduation. any plans for your future?” your mom immediately asked.

“honey, the boy just got out of school. the last thing he wants to do is think about college,” your dad said. “our daughter says she wants to travel for a bit before she goes to college. we told her that as long as she has the money and she’s with someone we trust, she can travel as much as she can.”

then you whisper something into izzy’s ear that had both of your parents wondering. when you finished, izzy chuckled and nodded.

“he let me say this, izzy is actually in a band.” you blurted out.

“a band? that’s great. you know, i was almost in a band once. . .” your dad spoke.

and that was your cue to take izzy someplace else so you ended up in your old treehouse that your dad built. the party was still going on as you and izzy layed on the wooden floor.

“do you want to go to college?” izzy asked.

you sighed. both your parents went to college so they expected you to go as well. but all of you wanted to do was travel. you were born and raised in lafayette, the only time you went out of state was for your cousin’s wedding in georgia that you didn’t remember because you were five years old.

“I don’t know. you know how our teachers always say you have to go to college to get a good job and good money? i don’t think that. i want to go anywhere, everywhere. i don’t need a math degree or read shakespeare,” you explained. “i want to go to los angeles, i want to experience it so bad.”

“then let’s go.” izzy said casually.

“what?” you turned to him.

“let’s go to los angeles, you and me.” he repeated.

“but what about your band?” you asked.

“we were never going to make it out of the garage anyways. maybe los angeles has something for me.”

so after a few weeks, it was decided. you and izzy were going to the city of angels. when you told your parents, they were hesitant, but you reminded them of your dad’s words. they helped you pack and even gave you extra money so you wouldn’t worry.

back at izzy’s house, axl was trying to talk him out of leaving, especially with ‘the prude’ as he nicknamed you. but izzy wasn’t listening to him. he continued packing as axl listed all the reasons why it was a bad idea.

“she’s not going to survive the streets of los angeles, izzy. look at her! she’s going to break and then she’ll come back crying to mommy and daddy.” axl stated.

“she won’t because she’ll have me.” izzy replied.

“then you’re both dead.”

soon, you and izzy were on your way to los angeles. your parents had payed for your plane tickets. when the plane touched down in lax, you smiled at the feeling of being out of indiana.

“you ready?” izzy asked, grabbing your hand.

you nodded. “ready.”

1982

you and izzy now called los angeles your home. it took months of working and saving up money, but you and izzy found a nice small house in a good neighborhood. your parents often called to make sure you were okay. you would sometimes find izzy on the phone with your dad.

when you and izzy arrived to the city of angels, you immediately started looking for a job. a record store owner hired you since the store had just opened and the way only had two employees. it was definitely a dream job for you.

it was a spring break when izzy’s friend, axl, decided to join you and permanently move to los angeles.

“you’re still here?” axl asked you when he saw you walk through the door of your house. he was sitting on the couch, feet up on the coffee table. he definitely took the phrase ‘make yourself at home’ too literally.

“yes, axl, i’m still here. this is my home.” you clarified as you walked towards your and izzy’s shared room. you dropped your purse on the floor then threw yourself on the bed. you were exhausted from work and all you wanted to do was sleep, but of course when axl rose is in your house, sleep is not an option.

“hey, you hungry?” you heard izzy ask from the doorway.

you could smell mac and cheese. “not right now, izzy. my feet hurt, i have a headache and i have the opening shift tomorrow.” you groaned.

“you have to eat something.” izzy encouraged.

“she doesn’t want to eat, let her starve i guess.” axl took the pot of mac and cheese from izzy’s hands so he could eat it.

“what is he still doing here?” you had enough and got up from your bed.

“don’t even start with me, bitch!” you heard axl yell as izzy closed the door to your bedroom.

“i’ll make him leave. he’s only here because we were rehearsing. we got a few gigs coming up. i promise he’ll be gone soon.” izzy assured you.

“he just gets in my nerves.” you sighed.

“i know. but he’ll be gone soon and you and i can continue where we left off this morning.” he started kissing you. then axl happened.

“you guys fucking in there?” he pounded his fists on the door.

“i’m going to fucking kill him.”

[unknownperson246]

a part two of a monster

ignore the inbox thingie it was just a reminder to myself to make a chapter 2 😭😭

Chapter 1

Chapter 3

A Monster Chapter 2

Words: 1,207

Warnings: *angst* *vampire slash* *pregnancy* *cussing* *wedding day* *public humiliation* *arguing* *grammar*

Don't mind the grammar. Grammarly wanted to be an asshole today.

☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆

You were sitting in your room that you shared with Slash. You were half asleep and you remembered that It was your wedding day. you grip your bed sheets and cover yourself with your blanket. You and Slash are getting married after 3 months of him turning you into a vampire. You were a groupie for a lot of bands but Slash was selfish and he turned you into a vampire so he could keep you as a pet forever. You hated him for it so much until you decided to move on. He gave you the love you haven't gotten from your mom or your dad or anyone in your life. Everyone used and treated you like you were just a piece of ass but Slash truly did love you so he decided to tie you to him forever. You know it was selfish and you were mad at him but over time you decided that it's not so bad. Slash had invited several people to your guys’s wedding. He invited Axl, Steven, Izzy, and Duff. He also invited Rachel Bolan and Sebastian Bach. You were on edge and very nervous. A few days before your wedding you found out that you were 12 weeks pregnant after you and Slash did it the first time. You wanted to give your child everything you didn't have. You loved it so much already. You did have a lot of questions about if it was going to be half-human or full-vampire because when Slash fucked you you were still human. You didn’t tell Slash because you were nervous about his reaction. You take sips of animal blood that Slash had poured for you in a cup earlier. You had a strong urge to light a joint and smoke it to take the edge off but you didn't want to harm your baby. You continue drinking the blood and Slash walks into the room. You have a weird feeling. You feel sick. You run to the bathroom while gagging. You throw up all the blood you drank into the toilet. Slash follows you. He grimaces at the sight of you puking.

“Hey, what's wrong, are you okay?” He asks you while holding your hair up and rubbing your lower back.

“Yeah I’m fine,” You say in a cold tone. You push Slash away from you and you get up.

“Look I just want some space please just leave right now,” you say to him with watery eyes.

“Is it the wedding jitters?” He asks you.

“Why are you avoiding me?” Slash mutters under his breath. He walks away anxious thinking something is wrong.

You ignore his question and just push him out. You still resent him for turning you into a vampire. You just told yourself it wasn't that bad to get over it but a part of you was angry at Slash. You weren't going to tell Slash until at least after you both got married. You had to get ready. Your wedding was in a couple of hours. You had your white silky dress that was very simply hung in the closet you and Slash shared. You did your makeup and your hair. You put the dress on and walked out of the room. You didn't care about how you looked, you just wanted the day to be over and done with. You looked like you were attending a wedding. You did not look like the bride. You and Slash are supposed to be the center of attention but you don't give one shit.

You sit on your dresser tapping your foot anxiously. You wanted to run away but you knew you couldn't hurt Slash like that. You both know that you couldn't have a day wedding because of the aggressive sunlight that seemed to kill you every time you went outside so you decided to do it at night. The time was finally here and you and Slash held your hands and read his vows to you.

“I will always be here for you whenever you need me. I love you and I love this baby” He says holding your lower belly in front of all the guests. You were shocked and dumbfounded. You were panicking and you wanted to run off. You didn't like being in front of millions of people. You found it nerve-wracking. After a couple of moments you and Slash are officially married and you run inside the mansion that you and Slash owned. Slash follows behind you.

“Hey, what's wrong?” Slash asks you while having a strong grip on your wrist. “How did you know about the baby? I didn't tell you” You say pissed off. “Calm down I just had an idea because you were puking for weeks and you were really moody. Vampires can also sense things like this” Slash tells you holding you by your waist.

“Well, at least that's over now that I don't have to tell you. I’m not going back out there” You say sitting on the couch. “Y/N that's rude,” Slash tells you.

“I don't feel well. I feel like I'm going to die any day now. All I want is my bed and some blood. Also, fuck you for turning me into a monster.” You yell at Slash.

“I can see how this is all affecting you. You are  still pissed off about me turning you into a vampire.” Slash yells back at you.

“Look, I don't want to argue with you on our wedding day. So let's just go back out there and act like we're happy and we can continue yelling at each other later” Slash says calmly while he holds your hands. 

You both get back outside. It was time for slow dancing with your new husband. He held your waist and you put your hands on his shoulders. You both danced slowly to a soft rhythm of music. Everyone's attention was on you after Slash announced that you were pregnant. After a couple of hours, the day you were dreading was finally over. You undid your hair and you removed your makeup. You feel something painful. It was a sharp and uncomfortable pain in your lower abdomen. Your hands clutch your lower belly and scream in pain.

“Slash! It hurts” You cry 2 times. 

He heard your cries from the bathroom and he rushed inside to find you on the ground holding your stomach. “What's wrong?” He asks, concerned.

“I feel a sharp pain. What if the baby is hurt?” You ask Slash while holding on to his shoulder with your other hand while the other one is attached to your belly.

“You sure it's the baby? Shit. I think the baby is draining you of your blood.” Slash suggests an idea.

“Well, we can't go to a human doctor,” Slash says while picking you up from the bathroom floor. “Well, no shit” You utter in pain.

“Here, just lay down on the bed and if the pain gets worse then I know a doctor. He’s human but I trust him.” Slash says while petting your hair.

“Just breathe honey” He whispers in your ear after he lays down next to you.

You take deep breaths in and out.

[morgan-the-lonely-brick]

I have thoughts about the clip and especially about Fang and generally all of the scene so yeah, an analysis-like tangent full of spoilers below cut

Out of the entire crew, I think Fang and Frenchie (especially Fang) are literally the best people to recieve comfort from. It's double true for Izzy.

Not only do they have like. The least invasive and violent trauma out of the crew, but they're both very empathetic and want to help others in distress. Even when that person isn't a particular ray of sunshine... like Izzy.

It also makes sense for Fang to be the main comforter. He knows Izzy. He's known him for a long while. And he's known Blackbeard for a long while too.

Watching him from the beginning of the clip, he seems to be the first one to notice Izzy's not feeling great. Far before the others do!

This is the first we directly see Fang in the clip and yeah he looks surprised that they're throwing loot overboard - as you should be but... even more than that he looks ALARMED. He knows something's up.

After listening to Izzy for a few seconds he is completely sure something's up. He checks in with Frenchie to know if he's seeing it too. We don't know where Frenchie is looking, but I'd assume he reciprocates the look.

Izzy stops mid-sentence. That's not like him. The others will have noticed it too now. Sure enough, here's Jim, thoroughly confused and/or taken aback at least.

Fang protection mode ACTIVATE! His first thought is to ask how Izzy's doing (i am so soft for them oh my god-) and to touch him - reassure him. Ground him.

we then get a "I'm fine, unhand me" which Fang does, to give Izzy some space and checks in again with a "you really don't seem fine". He waits for Izzy's response. He wants to make SURE Izzy's okay, or rather, is patiently waiting for him to admit that he's not.

The others join in saying that they've noticed. They've noticed how destructive his relationship with Ed is. I can't even imagine what's running through Izzy's mind at this moment. Probably like a waterfall of emotion - shame and anger and sadness and everything is too much - he's soon to break. He's trying so hard to hold it back, but he can't. He can't, when the truth is being thrown directly at his face by his own crewmates.

Frenchie comments "he's cut off at least two more of your toes hasn't he?" and Izzy almost flinches at that sentence. He quivers. That's his breaking point. And I. have to stop a bit to look at the implications of this. Form this scene at least, I understood taht when Izzy fails to make the crew follow orders, he gets physically punished. As we heard earlier: "It is your job to f-" *he stops, he shakes slightly* he's thinking about the consequences of them not following his orders - more of his toes cut off. That's horrifying. I'd start crying too, jesus...

Fang knows it's his breaking point and goes back to comfort him - even forcing it a bit on him, because he knows Izzy will struggle, but needs it. God, does he need it. He's always pushing people away, but Fang won't let him this time. He won't let himself be pushed away, because he cares. And he wants to show Izzy that he cares. So he persists.

And after only a few seconds of a very feeble struggle, Izzy accepts it. He's been strong for so long. He's been brave and hurting and isolated and repressed for so. So long. And he needs to let go. And he does. He whimpers. He sounds like a puppy who's been kicked. And he is. He is a puppy. A puppy that's been severely hurt and doesn't WANT to be hurt anymore. (god, i am weak at the knees, someone call the ambulace, i think i'm dying)

Frenchie steps in as secondary comfort to show that Izzy's really not alone in this and that none of them actually hate him. Even if he thinks he deserves it. Not even Stede's former crew hate him. That's what Frenchie represents here - to me. Fang and frenchie together show him that love isn't meant to hurt so much. It's not meant to be like this. And they also ground him in that moment. Izzy looks at Frenchie several times as he whimpers, perhaps checking in - seeing if Frenchie leaves after seeing him weak. But he doesn't. He stayes and he waits for Izzy to be okay and I think that means the world to Izzy. It means the world to me too. Izzy deserves all the comfort by this point.

Also I want to throw Edward overboard.

11/10 i need Izzy to have more hugs

[cononeillbreastingboobily]

Thoughts and feelings about Izzy in s2ep4 and what it means to me as a fellow disabled person:

Yeah, so, that episode, huh?

You know, I already knew going into this new season that Izzy's storyline is going to hit me hard regardless of the exact little plot points it might have, but it's only now, several hours after I've watched eps 4&5 that I'm really starting to digest what his story means to me in it's current shape. This is... a bit long. I also mention a character from a different show - Isaac from Sex Education.

Izzy has always been a bit of a dick, right? That's the reason a lot of people hated him in the first season.

Well, now he is a bit of a dick and disabled. And let me tell you how fucking ecstatic I am about that.

You see, looking for disabled characters in media I consume has rarely been gratifying - if they are there at all, which already is rare, they have very little to do, and if they're even semi-important, they're almost always the epitomes of goodness. Nice, understanding, quiet, patient.

Barely there.

The first time I truly felt something change in this area was with the appearance of Isaac in Netflix's Sex Education. He's sarcastic, funny, talented, honest and mean.

The fandom of that show hated Isaac, let me tell you.

It was mostly because he took direct action to separate the main ship of the show that had many people obsessed. As you'd expect. People's ableism immediately jumped out. As you'd expect.

Because how dare he have his own motivations and wants, and to do what he thinks is right?

Barely there.

And now we have Izzy. Izzy, who also did what he thought was right, which in s1 of the show was trying to separate Ed and Stede. He wasn't trying to make himself too likeable at any point (well. when the crew almost mutinied on him in s1 he did do a last ditch effort but. you remember how well that went).

My point is that now we have someone who isn't particularly nice, and now he's dealing with a sudden loss of ability in his body, which is going to make him even worse. He's angry! Of course he is! He's hobbling around with half a leg gone, humiliated, exhausted, barely recovered from impromptu amputation, no anesthesia. And a suicide attempt! He's angry at himself, his body, at Ed, at Stede, at God if he still believes in one, and who knows who else.

He isn't suddenly going to become nicer to people just because. He doesn't need to be humbled.

(a little sidenote: I do not accept the reasoning that Izzy somehow deserved to lose his leg, that "oh what did he expect riling up Ed when he was heartbroken?" etc. He wasn't expecting to get shot in the fucking leg. Nobody fucking deserves that, and if you think that Ed shooting him in the leg and Izzy subsequently having to have it amputated was an "appropriate punishment" for "what he's done", you're just cruel and wrong. Now scram.)

But that's the point. Disabled people deserve help regardless of whether or not we are nice.

Thankfully (not from Izzy's point of view - his pride was definitely bruised in that moment) the crew saw him struggle, and acted in kind. Because Izzy is their dick. And now - also their unicorn.

And it means so much to me that we get the representation of disabled people who thrash around and rattle the bars of their societal cages, furious at the world that isn't welcoming to us, and receive love and care and an invitation to a loving community regardless.

We shouldn't have to be here just when ableds are ready to give. We aren't meek vessels for your good will. Izzy is such a painfully realistic (as far as the universe of the show permits, given it's unavoidable goofiness) portrayal of the anger of someone who's lost some of their body's past ability, and how one might deal with it.

And I really wanted to say something about that, because I'm afraid it might get lost in the discussion about the more popular and more easily digestible aspects of the show.

[koris-crumbs]

gimme td character headcanons. literally any.

RAHHH okay anything for you pookie. These are mainly for my favorite four but i probably have some more somewhere in this brain of mine

Heather:

Fem lesbian obvious

Her and Noah are best friends bc they both clocked each other IMMEDIATELY when total drama island first happened

By best friends I mean both of them only admit it internally and never to each other

Shitty, homophobic parents meant she ran away/got kicked out 😋

MAJOR mommy issues. her dad just was kinda there and didn’t do anything

despises her siblings but LOVES noah and his own family

Ended up moving in with Noah trust she’s basically his sister

LOVES babies despite what people may think

Immediately falls asleep after eating (yeah she’s one of those people)

Pretends she only eats gourmet food when in reality her fave is honestly just a good, greasy burger from some shitty diner Noah took her too

Since she got cut off she makes Noah, and eventually Alejandro and Court buy everything for her 😍

LOVES her weird off brand total dramaverse jigsaw movies but that’s about the only type of scary movie she’ll watch bc it has no jumpscares it’s just gore basically.

HATES HATES HATES JUMPSCARES she’ll scream

thinks noah’s crush on alejandro is genuinely the funniest thing in the world she never lets him live it down

was stunned into silence one time bc noah flashed a photo of her bald on facetime one night

Immediately clocked Alejandro as being a closet bisexual she genuinely probably knew he was a boy kisser before he did

Courtney followed her private account after the events of World Tour transpired and heather screamed when she got the notification

has a key to Noah’s house bc she lives there (this will come back later trust)

passenger princess every time

Noah:

Gay gay homosexual gay

after World Tour and swearing off of reality shows (for now) he gets a job as a barista at some shitty cafe near his house

he gives Heather free coffee bc girl can’t live without it

drove like four hours to pick heather up after she got kicked out

is the designated driver of the group

also usually pays for everything despite being friends with mainly rich (or previously rich in heathers case) kids

knew he had a crush on alejandro from the start and just kinda let it simmer bc he figured nothing would ever come out of it

he has a mom car. a beat up subaru. he is truly the mom friend fr

carries that photo of bald heather around as a way to get her to shut up if she says anything too mean (usually to owen or izzy)

had to be the one to ask alejandro out and literally rehearsed it for hours

is a surprisingly good cook despite being the youngest of nine children. him and owen cook together all the time as a sort of bonding thing

hes a mommas boy trust. both of his parents are great though

never really went all out for halloween until he was roped into a group costume with owen and team e-scope one year. after world tour alejandro convinced him to do couples costumes with him

the most ATROCIOUS fashion sense known to man

Alejandro:

the definition of bisexual

he has the absolute shittiest gaydar in the world though. I know it

didn’t even know he himself was bi until world tour

ALSO meant he couldn’t tell noah was gay (stupid) and it devastated him on that plane even though he had no idea why yet

THIS BOY HAS JEALOUSYYYYY PROBLEMSSSS

being the youngest and always second best to josé definitely contributed to that

the daddy issues to match heathers mommy issues

always wanted a sister

after courtney and him make up after the events of world tour he basically gets her as one

they shit talk people in spanish together trust

has one sided beef with one of noah’s coworkers bc they have a crush on noah

him and heather stayed close after world tour but he did NOT know she lived with noah. he didn’t even know they were friends.

was always confused on why heather made him drop her off like a block from where she said she lived

was scandalized when he found out heather did in fact not strictly eat gourmet food

hates Owen with a seething passion. this one isn’t even a hc honestly. the hatred after world tour mainly stems from jealousy bc owens so close with noah

“why is he here??” “he’s my best friend, alejandro” “i thought I was your best friend ☹️”

yeah he sticks to that “best friend” story a lot.

noah only starts getting suspicious when alejandro says it’s okay for best friends to kiss just for funsies

him, heather, and courtney have to take noah shopping bc of how atrocious noah’s taste is

doesn’t watch movies in general but he loathes horror movies with a passion bc he’s just like heather and hates jumpscares

noah and court put a horror movie on during movie night one time and alejandro literally almost cut off noah’s circulation from how hard he was gripping

for their first halloween as a couple he made noah dress up as a vampire while he was a werewolf (a better love story than twilight 🤯)

does not. know what to do around babies and toddlers. they make him uncomfortable tbh. what if one crawls over to him? he will kindly pass on that, thank you

one time one of noah’s little cousins waddled up to him and he went 😟 bc he thought noah was testing how good he was with kids

has a key to noah’s house bc he’s down bad and already spends 90% of his time there anyway

neither his nor heathers keys were given to them by noah himself

noah’s momma strikes again

whenever he sits behind her he kicks heathers seat in the subaru

Courtney:

lesbian in denial for a while (lmaoooo i’m dr seuss)

honestly wasn’t even that sad about duncan tbh she was DEVASTATED about gwen though

musical theater kid. probably music kid in general.

despite popular belief i actually imagine her parents being very proud and genuinely good parents. they adore their baby girl

definitely has a big photo of her as a baby hung up in like the main area in her huge house

after heather comforted her she honestly regretted not getting her contact info so she had to resort to finding her on instagram after like a month of searching

her and alejandro had kept in touch so she was surprised when she found out he was best friends with heather and noah as well

100% said the infamous heartbreaking quote to heather during world tour at some point

“why not?” “i wish you were a boy” (sorry)

is a beast and super fan for horror movies and noah’s the first friend she actually gets to enjoy them with bc he doesn’t get scared (unlike a specific two people)

ALWAYS dresses up as a princess or fairy or smth for halloween every year without a doubt. heather nearly had an aneurysm the first halloween they spent together

is scary when she drives solely bc of her road rage which is why noah’s the designated driver not her (heather and alejandro don’t know how to lmaooo losers)

that’s it for them for the moment. maybe i’ll do more for other characters if i think of anything ^^

[angelst4re]

ash I'm begging you to write some type of Jace angst, like where he regects the reader after she confesses, or maybe stands her up when they're supposed to go on a date or they go to the club and he's being all touchy with her because he's drunk and then the next morning he just doesn't remember and doesn't care too

just some kind of angst </33

eeeee i loved this idea!!!! and i just had to write it because jace <33

Last Night- Jace (Wayland? Herondale?) x Reader

summary: they say drunk words are sober thoughts, and jace has a lot to confess after a few drinks

warnings: none!! :) (unless alcohol counts!!)

notes: i don't know if i like this :( i had a few different ideas of how i could've written this and i wish i did it differently now... but i could always make up for it with a part 2...? ;)

Everybody knew Jace wasn’t one for relationships. He hated to show his vulnerable side and he would never see the same girl more than once. You were quite upset by this, as you had liked him for quite a while now. Every time you thought he was going to open up to you and let you in, he would turn cold again, shutting his feelings off. Although it did upset you, you understood why he acted like this, given his childhood. 

It was finally Saturday night, and you and Izzy were getting ready to go out. The two of you would go out to clubs together every week, it would usually end in her bringing a man back to her bedroom and you going to bed even earlier than you would do on any other night. But tonight, Alec and Jace had been asking about joining the both of you, and although Izzy was reluctant at first, she gave in, and the four of you headed to the club. 

Not long after getting in, Izzy had already found someone to kill time with, and Alec was pleasantly surprised to have bumped into Magnus, which left you and Jace by the bar, and he was already on his second drink. 

“Do you want another one?” Jace asked, pointing to your empty glass. 

“No, I shouldn't drink too much tonight. But I might have a coke?” 

Jace nodded, and he ordered another drink for himself too. You looked cautiously at him as he handed you yours, thanking him, before sighing and looking for Isabelle.

“Does this happen every time?” Jace asked. 

“What do you mean?” 

“Izzy finds somebody and leaves you by yourself?”

“Usually,” you answer, “or sometimes I’ll find someone too.” 

After months of heartache, you wondered if you could win Jace over by making him jealous. He’s used to girls falling at his feet for him, so you decided to test it out. 

“Oh yeah?” He raised an eyebrow, “well you’re stuck with me tonight.”

“But what if a cute girl comes up to you? Surely I wouldn’t be stuck with you all night.” 

Jace chuckled, waiting a moment before responding, as if he was hesitant to answer. 

“I’m afraid to break it to you, but I don’t think any girl in this world is cuter than you.” 

You were shocked by those words, but you tried not to take much notice of what he said as he was clearly drunk. 

“Jace, you’re drunk. You don’t mean that.” You said, a smile creeping onto your lips as you shook your head. 

“I do mean it,” he told you, “I’ve always thought you were the most gorgeous- the most beautiful-”

“Jace!” You interrupted him, “stop talking!” You chuckled, reaching for your drink. 

“I’m sorry I don’t tell you enough. I’m just worried about how you’d react, I knew you wouldn’t believe me.” He said, leaning towards you and brushing a piece of hair away from your face, before letting his hand rest on your waist, causing your heart to skip a beat. 

“Jace…” You mumble, not knowing what else to say, “then why have you always turned me down? Why do you-”

“Because you’re too good for me, and I know you know it.”

You’re truly lost for words, so you pull him in for a hug, which lasted longer than you would’ve thought. His touch, his smell, the beating of his heart, it was all so overwhelming, and you knew that tomorrow, when he was sober, he would forget everything he told you, and it would all go back to normal. 

“Jace, you’re drunk. I’m taking you home, okay? I’ll text Alec and Izzy when we get back but I think you need to go to bed before you do something you’ll regret.” 

“But we’ve only been here for like 20 minutes, just one more drink?”

“Jace, no. We’ve been here for an hour now and you clearly can’t handle your alcohol. We’re going back.” 

He gave in eventually, sighing as he took your hand and led you through the crowd of people and towards the exit. 

The walk back to the institute wasn’t long, but it felt like hours due to the awkward silence between the two of you. You wondered whether Jace has finally realised what he had said in the club, that he had begun to sober up, but as he spoke again, it was clear that he was still rather intoxicated. 

“Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah, of course.” You replied, looking up from the ground to the gorgeous man beside you. 

“So I was wondering… because- I’ll be honest with you, I haven’t been feeling the best lately- I mean, mentally, everything at the institute has began to really-”

“Jace,” you gave him a sweet smile, an apology for interrupting him, “what do you want to ask me?” 

“I was going to ask if I could… maybe… sleep with you tonight? Wait no! No! I mean, stay with you, in your room. I just don’t want to be alone tonight, that’s why I went out with you, Izzy and Alec, I was hoping maybe I would find someone to take home with me.” 

You chuckled slightly as you approached the doors to the institute, looking at Jace with soft eyes. You had always felt empathetic towards Jace, Izzy had her brother (Alec), his friend Clary had her childhood best friend (Simon), and he had nobody, just like you. 

“Of course you can, Jace. Of course.”

When you got to your room, you did a quick bit of tidying whilst Jace changed in his room. By the time he had knocked on your door, you hoped your room looked okay, not that he would even take notice of it in the state he was in. 

You told Jace to make himself comfortable whilst you went to the bathroom, changed and washed your face. When you returned, Jace was sitting up in bed reading the book that you kept on your bedside table. 

“Do you like reading?” You asked as you sat beside him on your side of the bed. 

“Only if the book sounds interesting.” 

“Does that one sound interesting?” 

“Not really,” he answered truthfully, “I don’t quite get it.” 

You chuckled at this once more, and Jace put the book back down. 

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll explain it to you in the morning. I’m going to turn the light off now, try and get some sleep, okay.” 

“Yeah…” He mumbled sleepily, getting comfortable as you switched the lamp off, “goodnight, I love you.”

“Goodnight, Jace.” 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

When you woke up the next morning, the bed was empty and cold. You had wondered whether you dreamt the whole thing, but when you saw your book wasn’t in its usual place you knew it had all actually happened. 

You got up and got yourself ready to go down for breakfast. When you got there, you noticed Jace was the only one in the kitchen, eating a slice of toast. 

“Good morning.” You smiled, reaching for a bowl as you were going to have cereal this morning. 

“Mrnng.” Jace grunted. 

“Hungover?” You laughed as he nodded his head, “god, Jace, do you remember what happened last night?” 

His eyes widened in fear as he shook his head. 

“No, but I woke up in your bed. We didn’t… do anything… did we?” 

“No, we didn’t have sex, Jace. But you did say you loved me, and told me I’m the most gorgeous, beautiful girl in the world, although that wasn’t exactly what you said, I shut you up before you could finish your sentence.” 

“Oh.” He said, clearly not bothered as he continued eating his toast. 

“Oh? Jace, is that all you have to say about that?” You were quite confused now, and also angry. You knew you shouldn’t have taken what he said seriously. 

“What do you want me to say?” 

“I want you to tell me whether you meant those things!” You raised your voice, feeling your eyes begin to well up with tears. 

“I was drunk. I didn’t know what I was saying.” He scoffed, putting his plate by the sink when he had finished. 

“Jace-” 

“Please, my head hurts, I don’t want to talk about this now, okay? Maybe later but not now. Sorry.”

[onetimetwotimesthreetimess]

For the prompts Malec as Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce 🫢

Magnus as the one of the most successful and famous pop star ever and Alec as a famous football player who won 2 Super Bowl

As much as Alec loves football, he hates interviews and having to talk to the public. He knows he is lucky enough to live this dream, but he’s not really made for paparazzi and red carpets. He’s meant to stay inside his home and gang up with Jace on Izzy’s cooking.

But alas, life doesn’t always work the way you want and Alec is forced to appear on this interview by PulseCapture Insider. Alec thinks it’s the stupidest name for a channel but so are most of them.

He’s not really here for himself. He’s here for something else—he’s here to set the record straight. Not that he needs to, but because he wants to.

It’s the least he could do.

He’s barely seven minutes into the interview when he’s hit with the question. He’s not surpised because they’ve gone through all variations of the ‘how great was that touchdown’ question.

“So, now that you’re here. We believe it’s a great opportunity to ask you the million dollar question?”

Alec rolls his eyes, internally as he replies. “And what’s that?”

“About your new whirlwind romance with none other than Magnus Bane,” the interviewer comments.

There’s something about the way the interviewer says Magnus’s name that irks Alec. He’s not sure why.

“We’re dating, yeah.”

The interviewer, Sebastian looks a bit surpised, as if he didn’t expect Alec to answer so easily.

Media is so fucking weird. They’ll hound you until you’re forced to tell your truth but they’ll also hound you if you tell your truth easily. It’s insane on every single level and while Alec’s famous, he’s not familiar with the level of scrutiny that actors and singers have to deal with. He’s a sportsperson. There’s limit to that. But celebrities, their lives are on constant watch and Alec hates that.

He’s not sure how Magnus ever deals with it.

“That’s great,” Sebastian breathes.

“Yeah. Magnus is great.”

There’s a moment of silence and Alec guesses that all of Sebastian’s questions revolves around proding Alec. Now he needs a new line of questioning.

He passes a few comments about their relationship before he asks. “So, a lot of people are saying that Magnus Bane is with you for the money. Care to comment on that?”

Out of all the ludicrous things anyone can ask him, Alec believes this one takes the cake. He’s baffled by the judgement in people’s minds.

“If anyone were to be in this for the money, it would be me,” Alec smirks.

Sebastian frowns. “What?”

“I make 18 million dollars a year. Magnus makes around 150. His hair costs more than my entire house,” Alec points out.

“Oh.”

“Anyone with a single brain cell and a working laptop would be able to find out this. I’m guessing you only have one of the two things,” Alec smirks.

The interview ends shortly after that. Alec has a flight to catch after that so the next few hours pass easily. He’s exhausted by the time he reaches his destination.

He enters the building and the watchmen lets him in as Alec is on the list now.

Three minutes later, Alec is inside the loft and he searches for the other man. Alec’s not surprised when he finds Magnus in the balcony.

Magnus knows he’s coming, Alec had informed him earlier.

“Hey.”

His boyfriend turns and even though he knew, even know they’ve been texting the entire time, there’s a beaming smile on his face as he sees Alec.

“Hi, sweetheart.”

Alec smiles as he steps forward. Magnus makes space for him on the couch and Alec sits there carefully. This- this, between them is still relatively new so Alec is careful sometimes. Even though whenever he’s with Magnus, he never wants to think again. He never plans or prepares. He just does.

“Hi, baby,” he breathes as he finally connects their lips. Magnus’s smile grows against his face and Alec can feel the heat grow in between them.

“I missed you,” Magnus says quietly, as he brings their forehead together.

“Me too,” Alec replies and pulls Magnus in for another kiss. They take it slow this time, their bodies shifting closer to each other.

“I saw your interview,” Magnus says after a while as he lays against Alec’s chest, playing with his fingers.

Alec hopes he’s not said more than Magnus wanted them to. But they’ve talked about this. There would be no rules. They could both say whatever the fuck they wanted.

“And?”

Magnus turns and there’s a mischievous grin on his face as he replies, “I didn’t realise you’re in it for money, Alexander. I am hurt.”

A loud chuckle escape his lips at the words. “I hate to break it to you but it’s true, baby.”

[vroomvroomwee]

TW: suicide!

The show spent so much time on the psychology of the characters these first episodes, especially on Ed's feelings of feeling unlovable and I think it's pretty interesting how that reflects itself in his treatement of Izzy.

OK yeah, he's tormenting the entire crew, but it's pretty obvious he's picking on Izzy the most. Even the crew noticed, "we think you're in an unhealthy relationship with Blackbeard." it's something they've discussed. And at first glance, you could boil it down to Ed wanting his "Revenge" on Izzy. A sort of "Is this what you wanted?" or a "You did this." type of unspoken message.

But I think it's much deeper.

There's something Izzy does that no other crew member does. Something he has that no other person in Ed's life has.

Love.

He loves Edward. Both platonically and romantically. And Ed just.... can't stand that.

Look at his reaction

Annoyed, exasperated, angry, pissed off

Disbelieving

Coming back to his feelings of being unlovable, I think it's important to mention WHY he does everything that he does. Blackbeard is his shield. It's how he deals with pain and heartbreak. It's a form of self-destructive coping mechanism. He finally allowed himself to be happy and free, his walls taken down, his heart unguarded, and then he suffered for it. He bared his soul and allowed himself to feel love and receive love, and he got hurt. Blackbeard is protecting that soft boy that lives deep down in him, just like The Kraken protected him from his dad.

Therefore, from his perspective, it's much, much easier to accept that being unlovable is just his nature and not because of something he did. Accepting that that's just how he is, relieves him of the guilt of knowing he's done something wrong and that it's all his fault. And believing otherwise is too unbearable.

So he hides behind Blackbeard. Tries to convince everyone around him that that's just who he is. "You were always gonna realise what I am".

And to have that illusion challenged is terrifying.

To have someone force you to rethink everything that happened, and wreck your entire perception of yourself, tear down your defences, is terrifying.

Izzy's still persevering love, terrifies him.

In the gif above, his expression is almost pained. A mixture of "Don't lie to me" and "Don't love me." He's so convinced of his own worthlessness and his feelings that he just can't be loved. He feels safe in his conviction and hence in his misery. Ed has very masochistic tendencies, he's relishing in his grief and sadness because he thinks it's what he deserves. He pushed everyone away. Someone unlovable deserved all this pain. He falls back to Blackbeard because that's someone who's kept him safe before. It's someone he knows. Someone he's familiar with.

And Izzy challenges that.

Now he's forced to abandon his safety and be faced with a different reality. That he CAN be loved. And that is too painful.

"I loved you. As best I could, " despite everything he did love Izzy, but the fear that he could be hurt again prevents him from doing it properly. He's afraid.It's not that he doesn't love him it's just that he can't.

So he tries to get rid of it. Tries again and again to make everyone hate him. Tries repeatedly to squash the love Izzy has for him. And with everyone else, he succeeds. But not with Izzy Hands.

So there's only one option left.

And even after he's shot him and basically made him kill himself, Izzy still has love for him. But Ed still acts like he doesn't care, because the burden of being loved will finally be lifted.

Because that's what love represents for him now. Pain.

And it's so symbolic how he wants Izzy of all people to be the one to shoot him. The only one left in the world who loves him. The one he betrayed and pushed away. The one he wants to shoot him in the back. Say what you want, but I don't actually think he dreamt the scene. Simply wished it.

He's caught in a storm. A wave of feeling loved and unlovable. Of guilt and feeling like a victim. It's unbearable. He's tired.

He just wants it all to stop.

[axl-rose-lover-1987]

“Think about you”

Izzy Stradlin x reader

Fluff

Year: 1987

You got out of the shower to see the door to yours and Izzy shared bedroom closed. You thought maybe Izzy shut it and was sitting in the living room but when you walked out there he wasn’t sitting there. Huh you thought guess he must just want to be alone in your guys room. You decided to knock on the door and check on him. “You ok iz?” you said knocking on the door. “Yeah I’m fine” he answered back you could here his guitar playing softly too. “Ok just checking”. You said walking away from the room. It was odd of Izzy to not want to be with you on his days off especially since the band was in the middle of recording there first album which meant lonnggg nights in the studio. Is he mad at me? Is he sick of me? All these bad thoughts started to come to your brain. But before they got too bad you decided Izzy was just probably practicing some songs and you should just watch some tv. After about 3 hours of watching tv you were bored out of your mind and Izzy never practiced songs this long at home. You got up and this time you were gonna see what he was up to. You knocked on the door and then just walked in because after all this was your room too. A startled izzy looked up at you and started fumbling around “Y/n what are you doing I’m busy right now” Izzy said quickly closing a notebook he had and setting down his guitar. “I just came to see what your up too I’m bored” you said sitting down on the bed. “That’s cool but I’m doing something right now sweetie” Izzy said not looking at you and just tuning his guitar. Something was up you knew it he didn’t want you in there. “Are you writing a song I could help I helped you write Mr. Brownstone remember” you said smiling. “No i don’t need any help right now babe just go do something else ok” Izzy said sternly to you. Now you were hurt Izzy always loved to hear what you thought of songs he was writing. “Ok” you said trying to hide the sadness in your voice. You turned and left the room shutting the door behind you. You sat back down on the couch. Did he cheat on me? Does he not love me anymore? Is he really just trying to break up with me? Your thoughts consumed you. You started tearing up. And then before you knew it you were in a ball on the couch sobbing. A few mins later you heard your bedroom door creak open. Shit you didn’t want Izzy to see you were upset so you started to quickly wipe away your tears. “Oh my gosh baby are you ok?” Izzy said running up and sitting by you on the couch. “Y-yeah I’m fine Izzy I’m f-fine.” You said you tried to hide your trembling voice but it didn’t really work. “Your crying Izzy said wiping a tear away from your cheek. “No I’m not” you said trying to calm yourself. “Yes you are your mascara is running and your trembling come here babe tell me what’s wrong” Izzy said opening his arms to hold you. You went right in to them having him now holding you and resting his chin on the top of your head. You decided to tell him what happened. “I-I was crying because of you” you said. Izzy didn’t say anything so you continued talking. “You didn’t talk to me all morning then our door was shut and you know I overthink and so all my bad thoughts came in Iz thoughts like that you hate me and lost feelings and want to break up” you said now really sobbing. “You thought I was mad?” Izzy said sounding sad. “Y-yeah” you said sniffling. “I’m so sorry beautiful I really am I’m so fuckin sorry I didn’t mean to make you feel like that I don’t hate you y/n I was ignoring you because…” Izzy paused. “Fuck it let me just show you.” Izzy said getting up and waking to your room. He came back with his guitar and note book. He sat down on the floor in front of you. “It was supposed to be a surprise on the new record for you but I think you need to hear it now” you were slightly confused and now had stopped crying and listened to Izzy who had now started strumming his guitar and then began singing…

🎶I think about you

Honey all the time my heart says yes

I think about you

Deep inside I love you best

I think about you

You know you’re the one I want

Darling you’re the only one, I think about you🎶

Izzy sang it to you right from the heart. And now you cried more but this time tears of joy. You were so dumb how could you think Izzy didn’t love you. Izzy set his guitar aside and now got up to sit by you again. He tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. “I’m sorry I made upset baby I should’ve remembered that you overthink sometimes it’s ok though baby I just wanted to make my song about you a surprise” Izzy said smiling and kissing you on the cheek. “There’s more lyrics about you for the song in my notebook if you want to look that’s why I was hiding it from you” Izzy said now blushing and fidgeting with his fingers. You got quiet for a few minutes trying to soak it all in. “I love you so much Izzy” you said grabbing his hand and holding it. “I love you too baby.” Izzy said kissing the top of your head. “Did you like the song?” Izzy asked. “I loved it Izzy” you said smiling at him. Izzy chuckled he was grinning ear to ear and blushing. “Good because I meant every word.” Izzy said in your ear.

[communist-ant-hill]

OFMD and Revenge

I've been seeing a lot of posts focusing on characters getting comeuppance for their bad actions in this fandom lately.

People are talking about Izzy getting off easy since no one knows that Ed's behaviour is "his fault" or Ed being punished or Stede etc and like,,, no?

If that's what people want then like I get that and I see you, you're feelings make sense and they're about the furthest you can get from an unfounded opinion but that isn't really the approach ofmd seems to be taking when it comes to revenge.

In season 1 we have three major characters who's character arcs are focused on revenge; Jim, Chauncey and Izzy. Their quests for revenge are never framed as desireable.

Jim is basically done with their revenge quest for most of the show, all they really want is getting their knife back, until they return to their home where they're basically shamed for letting go of their grudge. Them continuing to avenge their family is shown to be detrimental. They leave their friends behind and Jackie outright tells them that it's not worth it.

Chauncey is just a flat-out villain this season. Like we get why he's going after Stede, I'd even say the show makes us sympathise with him, but it's also very obvious to us that he's hurting himself and the people around him by refusing to let go.

Izzy want's Blackbeard back, he's stuck in the past and he also develops a grudge against Stede specifically. These are the reasons he becomes one of our main antagonists in season 1.

But this is made even more obvious in season 2, which is why I find it so weird that a lot of people are still rooting for the possability of Izzy being punished.

I think Ed's storyline this season is the shows clearest declaration on how it's going to handle redemption and comeuppance going forward. Ed is pushed over the ledge at the end of season 1 and so far his s2 arc has been focusing on his awful coping mechanisms with trauma and guilt. He's been doing worse and worse things to the characters we love and he fucking hates himself for it. He keeps punishing himself for doing bad things by doing something worse. It's very similar to Chaunceys framing in s1 if you think about it. And he's to scared to stop because he belives that he's unredeemable, that there's no one waiting for him on the other side.

But his crew, his friends, Izzy, Stede even his own imagination (Hornigold) are telling him that he can let go of his anger and that if he'd just show them that remorse without also hurting them, they'd be there. Ed punishing himself isn't helping anyone.

And if we disregard the fact that Izzy has already lost a leg to a long and painfull infection, not to mention the fuckton of mental trauma, we see that he has put himself on the road to redemption by taking accountability for his personal actions as well as protecting the crew from Blackbeard.

Yeah he's technically one of the reasons that Ed is in such a bad place right now, but if the revenge crew aren't insanely pissed at Stede for Ed's behaviour then do ya'll really think they'd react that poorly to finding out about Izzy's involvement?

Like they've been there with him, they've seen the abuse he's endured by Blackbeard and the messed up relationship they have together. I'm pretty sure they'd all agree that he's been through enough.

Yeah he's a dick, and they've basically always known him to be one, but he's their dick.

Idk I just think people are a bit to caught up in moral absolutes here when really the happiest ending for everyone involved would be for the characters to forgive themselves for the pain they've caused, and to free themselves of their personal grudges so that they can properly heal.

[theclaravoyant]

AN ~ I had some emotions about domestic blackbonnet having healthy and positive emotional conversations. May turn into a collection of vignettes featuring their beautiful work inn progress! <3

Characters: Ed/Stede, Stede & Alma

Read on AO3

The Petrified Orange

Ed woke up to a little note left on Stede’s pillow. Izzy.

He frowned at it, and contemplated going down there himself. Then he thought the better of it. There was obviously a reason Stede had gone to see Izzy instead of waking him up, like maybe he needed some space. Or to talk about whatever was on his mind with someone who wasn’t Ed - apparently, having more than one freakishly codependent confidant could actually help one’s mental health and decision making abilities. Who would have thought. (He’s not sure where they stand on that if one of said confidants is dead, but it’s got to be better than nothing.)

Still. Ed was not, as a rule, a patient person, and an impatient person prone to panic could only handle so much mystery before the sun rose. So when he’d done up the bacon and eggs and put the tea on and Stede still had not reappeared over the threshold, he slung a robe over his shoulders, bundled breakfast onto a tray, and picked up a lantern to pick his way down there.

Stede was asleep in the sand by the grave marker. At least, he was until he heard footsteps and awoke with a start, dagger in hand.

“Oh. Ed.” He relaxed again and looked around, getting his bearings. Brushed the sand from his shirt and his mouth, distractedly. “I must have drifted off. The sound of the ocean is so nice out here.”

“Everything okay?”

“Yeah.”

“You sure? You’re sort of … staring wistfully.”

Ed gestured, and Stede caught himself doing it again. It was as if without even noticing, his eyes were drawn to the small, rhythmic motions of the distant waves. He had kind of been hoping it would help him think through something, but he’d mostly just thought himself around in circles. He sighed. There was so much in that sigh, Ed took himself a seat in the sand and poured them each a teacup. 

“What’re you staring wistfully about, then?”

“It’s Alma’s birthday today. My daughter. She’s thirteen.”

“First one you’ve missed?”

Stede snorted. “God no. Probably closer to the sixth; I don’t actually know.”

“Oh.”

“As always, I admire your faith in me,” Stede assured him, “but I was a pretty rubbish dad. I didn’t really try that hard with her, and even when I did I wasn’t very good at it. Then I went and … blew up her life, didn’t I? Abandoned her and her brother, then came back, then left again. She should hate me. I shouldn’t even call her my daughter, to be honest. She’s Mary’s daughter, not mine.”

Ed nodded, understanding. “So it was a Chauncey Spiral Night, huh?”

“Every spiral night is Chauncey Spiral Night,” Stede reminded him. “He did play all the hits. Plus. I found this while we were unpacking.”

Stede reached into his pocket and pulled out a stone. Looking closer, Ed recognised it. The petrified orange. Well, half of it anyway.

“She gave me half,” Stede whispered. “And kept half with her. I think it was her way of telling me she forgives me.”

“That’s sweet. Kids can appreciate courage, I think,” Ed said. “She must have known it took some guts for you to go back after all that.”

“You know what, I think she did. I think she understood why I did what I did, too. And that it worked. We were all happier for it, in the end.”

“Mm. Poison into positivity, eh?”

“Yeah.” Stede turned the orange over in his hand, and smiled. “I guess so.”

He cast a glance back over his shoulder, up toward the house, and Ed followed his gaze. He had an idea, and if he had it right, Ed was having that same idea right now.

“Maybe that’s what we should call it,” Stede suggested. “The Petrified Orange.”

“The real treasure we found along the way?” Ed chuckled. “I love that. I’m in.”

[alexanderlightweight]

Happy Wednesday!

If it tickles your fancy, I would love, love, love, love, love a fic of any flavor in the Mob Wife Alexander Lightwood universe you just casually yeeted onto my dashboard because that's obviously going to live in my head rent free for the next many moons. <3

(What a world omg)

Laws i love this verse so it will always tickle my fancy to get prompts and saeth keeps sending me things that boost my interest. Well this is definitely a flavor in that verse and I hope you enjoy it because it took a turn I didn’t imagine it taking.

Seriously I never planned this character to be in the fic or ever write from their pov and then it was like ‘oh hey interesting let’s do it”.

So this is basically an interlude after Alec’s figured he could either be a bodyguard or a boytoy and only one of those gets to flirt and touch Magnus all night.

Simon pov (he’s an unreliable narrator, prone to rambling, anxiety and dramatic and humorous interludes and he lacks so much info)

Alec is just like: I would just like to get back to my husband. he doesn’t sleep as well when I’m gone, so please talk as little as possible and just listen first.

Simon: I’m so glad I can’t breathe. If I move he’ll kill me.

(also mob wife is an occupation not a gender role but Simon doesn’t get that… yet)

—

“Simon.”

And Simon shivers because Alec Lightwood doesn’t need to raise his voice to be terrifying.

And Simon is terrified.

Officially.

But also not overwhelmingly so.

Because he’s also finally seventy percent sure Alec won’t kill him, which is much better than the fifteen percent Simon thought it was until recently.

Though in a crisis, he’s also the one Simon wants to hide behind.

Even in the beginning, Simon’s chances were always better with Alec, even if they both complained about it.

“Okay, yeah right. I’m Simon.” He hears himself say and he reminds himself to take a breath even though he doesn’t need to.

A lack of heartbeat and oxygen only mean that even Simon’s own body won’t save him from panic anymore.

“Yes? I know you’re Simon.”

And Alec says it like it's an obvious conclusion but Simon is just really happy to hear him say it, especially without a threat.

Because Alec isn’t the kind of person who is casual with most people and Simon is almost nothing to him.

Sometimes Simon worries he’s just another body to Alec — one in the congo-line-of-lovers that Izzy has had — but then Izzy reminds him he’s the only boyfriend Alec’s bothered to remember the name of.

And Simon is also one half of Clary’s package deal and boy, that sure did him no favors when they first met.

He takes pride in it.

“Simon—“ Alec says and he’s sighing, deep and long and Simon wonders if his inattention and eagerness has once again doomed his — now second — attempt at living.

Well living while being dead but Simon might actually stay dead this time if he lets his thoughts keep going.

“The greenhouse?” Alec is asking him and Simon wonders why until he remembers how much he hates Alec’s office.

The greenhouse is the only other place Alec takes official meetings.

And something shivers down Simon’s spine.

Because Alec doesn’t even like him but he’s noticed Simon’s dislike.

This is an Alec that’s trying to be careful.

So just how much does Alec notice? Simon wonders and the little part of his brain that he’s learned can save his life tingles.

Where does it end?

“For the love of, Simon sit the fuck down and breathe every fifth count.”

Simon finds himself on the hard marble of the Institute’s unfamiliar greenhouse floor. His head between his knees and a too heavy hand roughly smacking his back in sets of five.

There is brightness on his face when he finally opens his eyes.

“This is sunlight!” He accuses angrily, because he finally trusted Alec a full seventy percent and now this.

Betrayal!

“Simon you’re a daylighter. You were blasted by the soul sword and survived. You’re fine.”

And Alec doesn’t sound sympathetic and Simon winces because well—

Okay yeah. That’s fair.

Plus Alec has seen Simon drunkenly dance naked in the sun and that is a memory neither of them talk about.

It actually calms Simon down, because if Alec refrained from killing him when he plastered his naked body to Alec’s and yelled ‘teach me how to fight future brother-in-law!” Alec had in fact, spared his life.

First by not killing him.

And secondly, for not telling Magnhs that Simon’s no-good-very-bad-brain decided it was perfectly reasonable to cop a feel of Alec’s ass with vampiric strength.

It’s not a bad ass.

A little flat but very muscular with thighs that could break a neck and Simon tries very hard not to work himself back into a panic.

He does not need Alec Lightwood bringing him down from a panic attack while he thinks about how he nakedly gropped Magnus’ Bane husband’s ass hard enough that Alec had sighed and in the medical bay he’d dragged Simon to, activated an iratze.

“Magnus is going to know that these marks aren’t his.” Alec had said casually, “and he’s not going to like it. I really didn’t like it. You certainly didn’t like it either, if you know what’s good for you. So therefore, this never happened.”

And Simon is never ever going to tell even Clary that he did like it.

He’d liked it very much and he’d suddenly understood Magnus’ instant obsession.

Which had turned into a new crisis.

Because Simon’s taste is apparently Lightwood’s.

Which is not helpful for his continued life expectancy.

Because it will either be Izzy for eyeing up her married brother, Magnus for eyeing up his husband, and Alec for Simon’s sheer audacity.

“Simon, do I need to get someone else?”

“No!” Simon manages to get out because Alec Lightwood-Bane can never find out that he snapped out of the panic attack three minutes ago and almost sent himself into another panic attack because of said man’s ass. “I’m good. I’m good.”

Alec doesn’t look impressed but Simon knows he must not look very impressive.

He doesn’t take it personally.

Alec isn’t impressed by anyone besides Magnus, unless he’s impressed by someone’s stupidity.

And that never turns out well.

“Okay, so what can I do you for? I mean for you. What can I do for you?”

Alec is eyeing him like Simon is Magnus’ awful snake Baby.

Which is rude.

Because Simon has seen Alec with that nasty little worm and Alec is much nicer to Baby than he is to anyone besides Magnus and Madzie.

“Okay so listen carefully. This is a lot of information I’m going to give tou. Magnus has several identities in the mundane world. Some of them are linked legally but most of them are involved and hold a great deal of power in mundane crime groups.”

“Magnus is a mob boss!” Simon gasps out in giddy delight and then Alec is ruining his joy like the grumpy dilf he is.

The grumpy dilf he is not.

Because Simon doesn’t even know what a dilf is and he’s never been so glad that Alec can’t read his mind.

“No Simon. He’s not actually running a mob or gang or whatever else you’re thinking. He’s simply a powerful individual and is known for his information and skills and he has a lot of money. Nobody wants to be on his bad side. Everyone wants to be on his good side. So he has the authority of someone high-up and even the mundanes behave in Brooklyn. I personally don’t really care how Magnus got his status or how he maintains it.”

And Simon has so many questions but Alec has his—

if-you-interrupt-me-I’m-shoving-my-hand-through-your-chest-and-exiting-with-your-heart

— look on his face.

And Simon has seen that security footage. So he stays silent.

“It’s a persona that most High Warlocks do. Create identities in the mundane underbelly of their territories. Make sure the mundanes fear and respect them enough that they can come and go freely. They need to be trusted to keep an eye on any slip-ups. And no, they’re not undercover. They’re not doing the mundanes work for them.

“But Magnus and I quite honestly don’t care. We protect mundanes from the shadowworld, not from themselves. If the mundanes want to kill themselves and each other, that’s their problem. So long as they only do it in mundane ways and not with ties to the shadowworld. We don’t need the clave coming down here, bristling about the accords anytime soon, or anytime at all.”

And Simon swallows because he understands how serious this is, intimately.

Aldertree was sent by the clave.

He remembers Aldertree.

Izzy remembers Aldertree.

A lot of people remember Aldertree.

So he keeps focused, listening to the hummingbird-wing-beat of Alec’s pulse under his words.

“Magnus has done this for centuries. He knows what he’s doing. But we’d both prefer if I could go with him in the future.”

And Simon is practically vibrating because he’s nearly positive that he’s about to get a padawan.

Which, even in such a serious situation, is amazing!

“Which means I need to know more about modern mundane culture than I do.” Alec is grimacing and Simon knows it’s a testament to just how much Alec loves Magnus that he’s doing this.

“Magnus gets by because he has centuries of knowledge but I’ll need a crash course. And no Simon, I cannot read your mind.” Alec Lightwood’s eye roll continues to be a thing of beauty and Simon feels his undead soul un-die a little more. Because Alec definitely can’t read minds.

Or Simon wouldn’t continue existing.

“Look, Magnus and I went over a list of all the questions you might possibly ask. He gave me the answers so I didn’t have to waste time. We both agreed you’d be the best to ask, since you spend the most time around young adult mundanes. And you’re popular with your peers.”

Simon feels like he’s dreaming or maybe died again.

Except this is a much nicer if not possibly a more traumatizing experience than his first death so Simon concludes it has to be real.

His luck is always this bad.

“Magnus thought and I agreed that it would be just you and I, you tend to—“ and Alec trails off and Simon has a moment where he wishes he’d never drank Jace’s blood.

Because Alec is trying to be considerate.

Because he’s trying not to say that Simon can’t handle being in the same room with both of them after the incident.

It’s mortifying.

“Right, so do I need to call Magnus so he can join us?” And Alec looks very serious, eyes dark and calm and without a flicker of anger or of true concern. Alec is a good leader not because he cares but because he makes himself act regardless of care.

It took a while for Simon to realize that sometimes the people who care the most are the ones who let you down the worst.

And Simon winces, because Alec does look incredibly tired compared to when Simon saw him… however long ago.

“No sorry. I’m good, just a surprise. But like a good surprise, it’s like I’m Q and—“ and Simon trails off with a sigh because there’s no point and he is shocked when Alec runs his big hands over his scruffy perfect Lightwood face.

Or maybe it’s his Trueblood genes.

Whatever.

“Yes, okay fine. Simon you can be Q. But if you call me 007 or whistle that obnoxious tune I will give you cause to regret it.”

“You know 007?” Simon actually gasps, because this might truly be some epic dream and he doesn’t even register the threat.

Well, his hindbrain does and it’s screaming, but Simon can’t listen to it over the shockhold Alec’s words have put him in.

“Simon, consider who my husband is. Just for a minute.”

And Simon does consider it.

He considers how a delighted and charmed Magnus would coax Alec into ‘research’ for his ‘undercover excursion into the mundane world’.

“Oh my god.” Simon barely breathes out, “Magnus made you marathon them.”

And Alec is gritting his teeth. Simon can hear the grind of his incisors and he swallows, hard.

“Right. Absolutely no mentions of triple digits or shockingly appropriate theme songs.”

And Simon’s death flashes—

hunger the dirt the gnawing-bite-thirst-trap-feed of hunger and Clary’s screams

— before his eyes when Alec gives an exasperated sigh.

The moment passes and Alec is giving him a begrudging yet judgmental look.

“It’s often that the criminal part of mundane life is where the shadow world slips over. Magical drugs slip into mundane ones, easy money, anything goes. And no one cares about that except sometimes it leaves evidence. Unexplainable evidence that mundanes want explained. Right now Magnus is chasing a new rumor; and we’d like for me to be able to go with him.”

This is quite possibly the single coolest thing Simon has ever been involved in.

“So are you going in as his bodyguard? A new dealer of some super magic drug? Oh. My. God. Alec, are you going to be a rival boss or something coming in? Or a hitman? Are you going in as Magnus’ cleaner?”

And Alec is staring at Simon like he’s actually truly lost it.

Which Simon doesn’t get. They’re all obviously the best and most understandable choices.

“Simon, Magnus is my husband. Obviously I’m his mob wife.”

And Simon can’t breathe, but he feels the oxygen knocked out of his lungs.

Because Alexander Gideon Lightwood-Bane — a man who has prevailed heavily in both Simon’s nightmares and his recent and most horrifying wet dreams — wants to learn how to be a proper mob wife.

“Oy vey.” Simon manages to get out and then he looks up at Alec and blinks at his too-tall, too-powerful body.

And wonders how he’s supposed to guru Alec into anything that can pass as what middle-aged criminals will consider a wife.

Mob or otherwise.

Later they’re finally finishing up their first crash course and Alec looks worse than he did with his own arrow through his chest.

But he escorts Simon out, ordering his shadowhunters absently to various duties and checking in as he passes and Simon takes it in with a sudden wonderment.

Simon’s seen more changes of leadership in his short time as a part of the shadowworld than is normally seen in a generation.

And he got a much more up-close and unwanted personal view of how badly it can go.

And Alec is… he’s surprisingly really great. Even if Simon only has shitty examples to compare him to and so when Simon is walking out into the sun and Alec is going through a portal that appears out of nowhere, he lets his guard down and mutters.

“He’s so totally M.”

And just before the portal warps out of existence, Simon’s hearing picks up a quiet, irritated—

“Simon.”

And he winces.

Alec’s senses are frightening and Simon is a vampire.