#I am just learning to hopefully get a better job

[crowcryptid]

90% of hacking is scanning to see if someone misconfigured their security settings or if they’re using out of date software

9% is social engineering

And the last 1% is actually trying to find an exploit and write your own code (idk how to do this part yet)

[n3ongold3n]

Some may flowers from the backyard and the alottment 💐

[mortalityplays]

You need more free art.

I quit my job yesterday. Well, actually I quit my job eight weeks ago, but they finally released me yesterday for good behaviour. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do - but I do it for the wrong reasons. Working for major charities, you learn very fast that 'I want to make the world a better place' is a phrase you use to ask people for money, not to give them things. I was an ass-backwards fit for that world.

You need more free art. I need more free art. Everyone has felt the shift in our media landscape over the last ten years, away from access and towards nickel-and-diming the human experience. That lack of access is making life and culture worse for all of us, across the board. Paywalled news sites leave us less informed, attacks on the Internet Archive leave us less capable of research. Algorithmic social feeds and streaming walled gardens trap us inside smaller and smaller demographic bubbles, where we are increasingly only likely to encounter ideas that have been curated for us by marketing departments. Hasty efforts to resist AI commodification have only led to more artists locking their work away and calling for even more onerous systems of copyright law. This is not good for us.

We all need more free art.

So what am I going to do about it?

This is a question I have been asking myself for years. It's easy to sit here feeilng frustrated and thinking 'boy I hope SOMEONE does SOMETHING'. It's harder to take action in a world where I still have rent to pay. But hard doesn't mean impossible. Sometimes hard just means time-consuming, frustrating and slow. And sometimes it's worth doing something time-consuming, frustrating and slow because...I want to make the world a better place.

I'm going to do this:

1. From April 1st, I am relaunching as a freelance writer and editor.

This is the one that will (hopefully) help to pay the bills. I am a very good and experienced editor. I've worked on hollywood movies, I'm a member of the Chartered Institute of Editors and Proofreaders, I have clients who have been coming to me exclusively for more than 10 years.

Alongside bigger contract jobs, I am going to refocus on offering my services to small-press creators at a reduced rate. That means you, graphic novelists. That means you, itch and amazon writers. I want to help you develop your work, the same way I help large organisations. You can learn more about what an editor even does and what kind of pricing you can expect here.

2. I'm also going to start giving shit away. Like, constantly.

Next week I'm going to launch a new free shop. If you're unfamiliar, a free shop, giveaway shop, swap shop, etc. is an anarchist tradition of setting up a storefront where anyone can take what they like for no cost. Offline, this often means second-hand clothes, tools, furniture, food etc. Online, I am going to be giving away digital art. Copyright-free, no strings attached. It will (eventually) feature everything from print-res posters to zines, poems, tattoo flash, t-shirt designs and anything else we come up with.

Yes, I said 'we' - while this is a curated collection, it will feature work from a variety of credited and anonymous artists and activists, all of whom have agreed to give their work away to the public domain. Some of it will be practical, some of it will be political, but a lot of it will be decorative or personal. This is, in part, a response to recent difficulty I had finding somewhere that would print a one-off joke poster for a friend that featured the word 'faggot'. Enough. No middlemen - no explaining ourselves. Just print our shit and enjoy it.

I'm very, very excited about this project. I'll have more to say about it closer to the launch, but you can expect it to go live on March 27th.

2.2 I forgot to mention the ACTUAL LAUNCH GIVEAWAY

To celebrate my launch, I am going to be giving away a ton of physical prints. When I went looking for my old stock to see if it was worth setting a new (paid) storefront up, I realised I had way more old work in storage than I thought. This will be announced in its own right on Monday, but this is why I've been hinting you should go follow my Patreon.

On April 1st, I will pick 8 random patrons (from across all tiers including non-paying followers!) and mail them a bundle of assorted prints and postcards. The prize pool includes A3 and A4 posters, packs of A6 postcards, and printed minicomics that I've previously sold for up to £12 each.

You don't have to be a paying subscriber to enter - this is strictly no-purchase necessary. It is purely and entirely a celebration of the concept of GIVING ART AWAY FOR FREE.

3. PORN, YOU PERVERTS

Because I still have to pay to stay alive, I am going to be subsidising all this free art with the introduction of Fuck You Fridays. Starting from March 29th, I will drop a new 18+ short story on the last Friday of every month, over on itch.io (yes I know my page is desolate right now, don't worry I'll get there).

The first edition, Go Fuck Yourself, is about, well - telling your boss where to stick it. Julia has had it with her millionaire man-child manager, and is just about ready to let him know what she really thinks. It's a short and steamy 5k words, with a gorgeous cover illustration by @taylor-titmouse, and you can pick it up for $3 starting from March 29th.

4. ANOTHER BIG SURPRISE

I'm keeping this one under wraps for now, but April 1st will also play host to one more (FREE) launch. If you've been following me for a long time, you might remember the other significance of this date (no not April Fool's day, though that is certainly thematically relevant to this entire effort). That's all I'll say right now. Watch this space.

tl;dr: I'm sick of paywalls and career ladders. I'm literally putting my money where my mouth is. More free art for everyone and I'm not kidding around!!!

[writingquestionsanswered]

Not to be a downer, but I actually finished my novel and now I’m confused because I don’t want to publish it. I don’t even particularly want anyone other than maybe my two close friends to even read it. What on Earth did I write 40k words (which I know is not really long enough for a novel, but it’s still far and away the longest thing I’ve ever written) for? I know people say “write for yourself” but like… am I just wasting my time? Help?

(p.s. you can leave this off anon)

(p.p.s your blog is really great 👍)

There's No Such Thing as Wasted Writing

I'm going to tackle this two ways...

#1 - "Write For Yourself" - there's a reason this common phrase has echoed through the Hall of Writers since time immemorial. It's because it's true! Writing doesn't have to be anything more than a pastime. It doesn't have to be anything more than something you do for your own benefit and enjoyment.

I have an in-joke with family members about how any time one of us does something the least bit crafty, DIY, skilled, whatever, a particular family member will always say, "You did a great job! You should do it for a living!" Like, someone can't even crochet a Kawaii mushroom without being pressured to turn it into an Etsy dynasty, or paint a cabinet without being pressured to become the next Property Brothers. And that's such a BANANAS capitalistic mindset, isn't it? This idea that nothing can be done purely for our own enjoyment. That you can't just write a novel because you want to... you can only write it if you plan to share it or publish it? It's just so silly.

And, the thing is, we don't even apply that mentality to a lot of other things people do purely for enjoyment. No one is streaming all of Bridgerton in two nights and saying, "I enjoyed every second of that, but why did I do that? Such a waste of time!" No one spends an hour strumming their guitar under the stars on a beach, and then says, "That was so relaxing and fun, but I didn't charge for that performance and I didn't record it to sell it, so that was obviously a waste of time."

You know what I mean?

#2 - And Anyway, Practice Makes Perfect - And if you keep writing--even if you continue not to share or publish--you'll get better and better with each story you write. Which, maybe all that means is you get to appreciate your own improvement, but also, should you ever change your mind and decide to write something to share or publish, you've now spent time honing your skills. Even if those other stories never see the light of day, they're still an important foundation of the writer you become. Do you know how many unpublished novellas, novels, and short stories I have? Too many to count. Hundreds of fan-fiction and original fiction short stories I've only shared with one or two other people, if anyone. A dozen or so novels and novellas that have only been read by a few people, and some haven't been read by anyone else or have only been read by my CPs. I would never consider those stories and novels and novellas to be a waste of time, because I know every single one made me a better writer. My published work is better because I wrote those other things.

So, I hope that makes you feel better. At the very least you hopefully enjoyed writing your novel--or at least got something out of it--and you definitely honed your writing skills, which matters! ♥

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

♦ Questions that violate my ask policies will be deleted! ♦ Please see my master list of top posts before asking ♦ Learn more about WQA here

[hope-you-brought-kneepads-bitch]

Killing Wanda

Summary: You, Nat and Yelena are successful assassins, damn good at your jobs but there was one woman you couldn’t stay away from, and when you get a job that tells you to kill her, well you needed to be around Wanda all the time now, and she wasn’t getting away from you, no one would get on your way to have her

Words: a lot, like over 3,000 I think

Warnings: Minors DNI 18+ suggestive themes, swearing and adult themes

A/n: God I’m on fire with releasing fics, hopefully my writing drought is over now and I’ll be writing more now

Also this is long so I’m hoping there’s no mistakes but if there is I’m sorry

The door was open when Wanda came downstairs and she started to panic, she closed the door she was sure of it, what could have happened?

A noise from the kitchen broke Wanda out of her thoughts and she stepped quietly towards the kitchen where the noise was, finally seeing someone digging through the kitchen drawers “you really should learn to organise your utensils you know, it’s a mess in here, if you brought a woman home and she looked in here I don’t think she’d want to do the tongue tango with you would she? A disordered drawer isn’t impressive to people Wanda”

You had yet to turn around and face Wanda, content to keep sorting out the scrambled mess “Y/n why are you in my house?” Wanda whispered and you finally turned around smiling at the scared woman “oh my darling you look tired, have you been sleeping well?”

Wanda didn’t answer instead just moving around the table to sit down still holding your gaze “I’ll ask again, why are you in my house?”

You bit your lip holding in a laugh “oooooh we’re feeling grumpy tonight aren’t we? Maybe you need to relax, I can call Yelena to make us Mac n cheese and I’ll send Natasha to get some wine-

Wanda slammed her fist down on the table cutting you off “don’t fucking play with me Y/n, tell me why you’re here!”

While you were slightly caught off guard you pulled yourself together and reached for a dagger on your person and pointed it at Wanda giving her a warning “I wasn’t finished talking, you’re a grown woman and therefore should know better, it is very rude to do that detka” Wanda’s bravado flew out the window when you rounded the table and held your hand around her throat

“I am here because I was asked to be here, someone paid me a lot of money to kill you slowly and painfully, whoever you pissed off really wants you to suffer and I mean really suffer, the list of things they want me to do is endless”

You eased off the tension on her neck and lent forward kissing her cheek “I like your face, such a shame I have to cut it up, they want picture proof of your death”

Wanda was wavering she was scared, she knew what you did and she knew you did it damn well and left no trace “okay Y/n let’s just calm down, please tell me who put the hit out on me”

Your lips stayed close to her and moved towards her neck kissing her there smiling at the shaky breath she released “I can’t disclose client information Wanda, but it’s someone you know, and from how they speak, someone who’s seen your body in a way that I can only dream of and trust me I do dream of it”

You pushed Wanda gently into the counter leaning into her “how do you dream of me?”

“Oh? I dream of you in the filthiest and most depraved ways, none that I’m willing to discuss here of course but just know that I everytime I kill someone and their blood spills onto me I imagine it’s yours”

“That…that doesn’t sound very sexy”

You smirked letting your hand rest on her hip and the other next to her head “it is when I’m imagining I’m buried deep inside of you cutting up your pretty body-

“Y/n! Have you done yet? We are needed back” Yelena casually walked into the house disturbing your clearly romantic moment with Wanda “I’m in the middle of something Yel”

The blonde scoffed looking at Wanda “yes I can see, she looks terrified, or aroused maybe both”

You glanced down at Wanda “aroused, I can feel how wet she is- Wanda quickly pushed you away at that and you laughed “aw princess are you embarrassed? Its okay I’m glad my intimidation tactics get you this aroused”

Just then Natasha entered angry as ever “Davayte zhe teper'!” She didn’t care what was happening just that you three needed to leave before people started to turn up for them

“Yeah yeah whatever Nat we’re coming” you kissed Wanda on the nose leaving her speechless and still “lovely time we’ve had here princess but I’m needed elsewhere, enjoy your dinner and I’ll see you soon”

The trio left without another word and Wanda sank to the floor controlling her breathing “why is she obsessed with me”

**************************************************

“Why are you obsessed with Wanda?” Yelena poked at you while in the car “she’s hot” you said but the blonde just laughed “I’ve seen you with women you find “hot” and it wasn’t that with Wanda, I think you really like her and want to make babies”

You scrunched up your nose and slapped Yel on the arm “we’re two women idiot, and no matter how hard I’d try I don’t think I could get Wanda pregnant, but god I’d give it a damn good go”

You looked out of the car window admiring the views that Nat drove past, actually you didn’t recognise where you were, weren’t you going back to the house?

“Natty I don’t know if you hit your head back there but I don’t recognise where we are”

The redhead shrugged in the front seat “you need to lie low for a while, you’ve been too careless”

You scoffed “don’t be so fucking ridiculous Natalia I’m good at my job and I’ve never let any personal feelings affect it” you defended

Nat slammed on the breaks sending you near enough through the seat and beyond “fucking hell Nat are you on your period or something?”

“You know we don’t get our periods der'mo” Yelena piped up but you both ignored her “last week you spent 4 hours watching Wanda, you watched her eat dinner, watched her drink wine and then even watched her sleep with a man”

You rolled your eyes at that “yeah all of 4 minutes of that man basically humping poor Wanda and her faking an orgasm”

Yelena was intrigued “wait, how do you know she faked an orgasm?”

You patted poor young innocent Yelena on the back “oh my sweet little Yelena, it was in the way she only shuddered slightly when the man whispered he’s close and then immediately said she came afterwords, he left soon after then she picked out her favourite red vibrator placed it against her sweet-

“Stop! I’ve had enough Y/n let’s just go home and sleep okay, I’m sorry I was so angry but it’s been a rough day”

You kissed Nat on the cheek “it’s okay detka you’re our favourite little black widow, very spicy and dangerous”

Nat sighed and gave a small smile “okay let’s not get all mushy, just stay away from Wanda okay?”

You shrugged “well someone still gave a hit out on her, so I’ll have to see her sooner or later again”

*************************************************

You said you’d stay away from Wanda for a little bit but you couldn’t help it, you found yourself back at Wanda’s house waiting for her in her bedroom, an open window offered you a perfect entry to the room

Wanda jumped back when she entered her bedroom obviously not expecting you “Y/n what the fuck?!”

You smiled wide “hi Wanda, I’m sorry I couldn’t stay away, I still technically need to kill you you know”

Her face fell and she started to step back but you stopped her holding her wrist and pulling her close “don’t worry Wanda I don’t want to kill you yet, I want to enjoy you”

Wanda let herself be pulled into a hug, you wrapped both arms around her waist and kissed her shoulder “you’re so tense my love, did that man not make you cum again?”

Wanda pulled her head back looking at you “what do you mean?”

“I had to make sure you were being safe and when I saw that man humping you like a dog in heat it was heartbreaking, you deserve so much better”

Wanda pushed you away sitting on her bed with her head in her hands “I cannot believe you’ve been watching me have sex, that’s so fucking weird”

You shook your head sitting next to the redhead “no honey it’s not, I needed to watch you to make sure you were okay and as I said that man didn’t look after you, he didn’t treat you well enough, didn’t do any foreplay, didn’t even kiss you, how ridiculous!”

Wanda stood up from the bed and started pacing around the room “what the hell is wrong with you? Why are you obsessed me why do you watch me? And don’t say it’s because someone wants me dead, if you actually did your job I’d be dead already!”

Your eyes darkened, no one’s ever questioned your job before “I am successful in my work Wanda, I have never ever messed up a job and don’t you ever assume otherwise, I will kill you one day Wanda and when I do it’ll be so quick you won’t even realise until you’re stood in front god himself”

Wanda had backed up against the wall with you following her every step, you ended up pressed chest to chest with Wanda and loved every minute of it “well this is a nice position isn’t it?” You smiled, your demeanour changed from angry to soft way too quick for Wanda’s liking, but she was still slightly nervous

“Okay Y/n I’m sorry just, I’m just stressed that’s all”

“Stressed? Why is my pretty girl stressed?” You ran your fingers across her face and on her stress lines “don’t give yourself winkles my love, why are you stressed?”

Wanda sighed heavily giving in and just decided to tell you “the man-the one you’ve watched in my house, like a weirdo, he keeps texting me and stalking me at work, I didn’t call him back after the last time he came over and I think he’s mad about it”

You nodded along listening loosely while studying her face, she was gorgeous

“I see, he’s a bitch then, doesn’t deserve you, don’t worry Wanda I’ll deal with him” you pushed yourself away from Wanda who instantly missed your comfort surprisingly

“Wait where are you going?” She tried following you across the room to the door but you stopped her “I’ll be back later I promise”

“Are you going to hurt him?” She asked and you just smiled “I’ll be back pretty girl”

You left without another word and Wanda was sure she wouldn’t be hearing from Vision again.

********************************************

You decided to bring Yelena on your little trip, she was like a puppy, she needed to be taken out to kill at least 3 times a day or she’d starting biting the furniture and peeing on the carpet

“Are you sure this is okay? We’re assassins for hire not free killers”

“Not free killers? Didn’t you attack a guy because he tried touching that Kate girl?”

Yelena stopped in her tracks and widened her eyes “how do you know about that?!”

“You got drunk and told Nat and I when we were playing uno”

She rolled her eyes “anyway that was because she didn’t deserve to be treated like that”

“And that’s why I’m doing this for Wanda, she deserves better and that’s me clearly so by killing this guy I’m one step closer to that”

“Aren’t you meant to kill her?” You finally found the house you were looking for and saw the man with yet another woman he was sure to disappoint “I am but that doesn’t mean I can’t have fun, plus there’s no time limit on the request so I can take my time”

You and Yelena stood outside the front door deciding on how to approach the situation “so, sneak in or knock the door down and start shooting?”

You only responded with pulling your gun out and shooting the lock and kicking the door open

“Daddy’s home!” You stormed through the house and held the surprised man at gunpoint

Yelena walked through the door following you “just full on craziness then, okay”

“What the hell are you doing in my house?! Who are you??!” The moustached man was scared and you could tell, he was trying to act tough though in front of his lady friend, it’s okay though she isn’t the one you were here for

“White widow can you take this lovely lady out of here and make sure she gets home safely Spasibo”

Yelena nodded and offered the lady her hand which she took “we are quite sorry about the intrusion, I hope you forgive us”

The lady nodded taking Yelena’s hand “okay” you were glad she wasn’t in the mood for an argument, you didn’t want to kill two people “thank you Miss”

When the two women left you looked back at Vision “so why do you think I’m here?” You asked casually while still pointing the gun at him

“How the hell should I know?? Who are you?!” He was stressed and it nearly made you laugh “you’ve tried sleeping with Wanda maximoff twice, and both times you’ve never made her cum, you don’t deserve her”

The man was perplexed, how the hell did you know what he did with Wanda “how do you know I’ve slept with Wanda, did she tell you? And why do you care??”

You stepped close enough to him to press the gun against his chest “Wanda belongs to me, and watching you try and pathetically fail to fuck her was horrendous, and then for her to tell me you’ve been stalking her, what a pathetic excuse of a man you are”

He tried moving away but your gun pressed harder into his chest “you’re crazy, I’m pretty sure Wanda doesn’t belong to you”

You smiled “she does, she doesn’t know it yet but she definitely belongs to me, and you being a prick is slowing that process down so I do apologise but I have to kill you”

His face went white, all bravado flown out of the window and it made you giddy, you loved when they got like this, all scared, some wet themselves too but you hated that, totally killed the mood when that happened

“You can’t kill me! The police will find you” he was scrambling

“Well it’s been 10 years and I’ve yet to be caught yet so I don’t believe they’ll catch me for this”

“Okay but the gun will make a loud sound and the neighbours will get suspicious!”

“I’ve got a silencer dipshit, as I said I’ve done it for 10 years, I’m no amateur”

You pulled the trigger refusing to let him continue, the bullet went straight through his heart killing him instantly, you didn’t waste time standing around admiring your work instead calling a clean up crew

“Bucky, follow my location and clean up quickly and quietly” you hung up and left the house heading back to Wanda like you promised, she was going to be so happy you were sure of it.

[starrjoy]

Life update. Probably the last I’ll do for a while

Unfortunately, my little family is still not doing great. The economy is rough, so jobs are pretty few and far between. Commissions have been our only source of income for the past four months, and that’s barely been enough to get by. On top of that, my health is pretty bad, so I haven’t been able to manage my usual turnarounds. It’s all very tiring. We have leads and interviews coming up, so we can only hope things will get better soon. I’m not giving up hope that we’ll get through this, but the exhaustion is setting in.

On top of that, I’m just not all that into Sonic anymore. It’s hard to lose a hyperfixation, especially one that has brought me so much community and joy for so long. I’ve just simply lost touch with the fandom, and I don’t find myself as excited as I usually would be for upcoming events. The ending of Prime and the Knuckles series just really took it out of me lmao.

Because of that, I’m sad to say I won’t be working on Pandora for the foreseeable future. I’m not going to promise I’ll return to it since there’s simply no way to tell, but I want to thank everyone who has supported me through its 100+ pages. I learned so much from making it and have definitely developed as an artist and writer throughout the whole process. It’s sad to say goodbye. Hopefully soon I’ll have the time and energy for bigger and better projects, but for now, I’m going to rest.

If you’d still like to support me, please check out my ko-fi. I’ll be uploading more personal wips there soon, as well as recent commissions. And of course, comms will be open again as soon as I finish this last batch. I’ll still accept Sonic comms, but please know I take all sorts and am definitely down to stretch my creative abilities :]

That’s all for now <3

[princessbrunette]

popes new gig as a driving instructor was meant to be easy money. he was a good, safe driver — and you were his first ever client. but from the smile you’d given him, all glittery and pink as you bounce over to his car and lean over to his driver seat window to greet him, giving him a direct look down your cleavage — he knew you’d do more than learn driving from him.

you preened under his praise everytime. it was distracting. he was trying to teach you how to safely drive, but everytime he’d let “you’re doing really good, keep going.” or a simple “good job.” leave his mouth you’d nearly swerve off the road. his subtle tips and adjustments would be met with flirtation, and giggly “yes sir”s to the point where he’d forget the rules of the road in an instant.

this went on for weeks, and due to his best friend jj’s constant lecturing regarding; ‘dude, you’ve got a hot ass girl in your car, practically begging for the D — you’re telling me you haven’t swooped on that yet? do better, man.’ pope decided enough was enough. this was either going to fix his problem, or make things really awkward— but it was a risk he was willing to take.

“pull up right here, in this parking lot.” he’d been extra tense that day, rather quiet the entire lesson with a stiff jaw and eyes hung low. you figured he’d been in a bad mood, and even went easy on your usual routine of finding reasons to touch his bicep at each stop light and flirting with him. you did as he said, pulling into the empty lot and finding a space somewhere in some dark corner where it would be easy for you to park.

without the humming of the engine filling the silence now, you turn and look at him in the dim lighting. pope often had two ways of going about things with women — either ultra nervous, or ultra to the point. with you, he’d started off a nervous wreck — practically jizzing in his pants every time you’d graze your manicure against his arm for the first few lessons, but due to the constant teasing he’d been driven to being directly upfront with you.

“look, i can’t take all this teasing anymore.” he stresses, brows creased. your giggly smile drops a little bit, seemingly switching on the innocent act. “every week, you hint and hint that you’re tryna get into something with me— and then at the end of the lesson, you just get out and walk away like it never happened.” he sighs hard, and you have to admit it’s rather cute.

“i’m sorry…” your brows knit together, guilt evident in your expression.

“and that’s fine — i would never pressure you to do anything like that, and believe me — i know this is completely unprofessional to be proposing on the job, and yeah — this could get me fired,” he rambles, working himself up. “but look, i’m a man okay? i am biologically programmed to have a bodily reaction to girls like you who can’t stop touching on me and being all adorable and sexy. that being said — if you wanna fuck, let’s just get it out the way, right here right now— and if not, we can drive you home, and never talk of this again. but you gotta stop acting like that, ‘cause i’m in pain.” he finishes up with his rant, sucking in a breath that he didn’t know he’d been holding the entire time. you stare at pope. pope stares back.

“oh fuck, oh pope!” you mewl into his neck as the car jostles violently from the backseat beneath the dim lighting on the parking lot. you’re naked from the waist down, and his shorts sit pooled around his ankles as you bounce on his cock, dick impaled through you. “s—so big, just like i imagined!”

“you imagined?” he pants, two hands planted on your waist as he helps you fuck down on his lap, staring up at you hopefully as he lifts his hips to meet your movements.

“every night! pictured you punishing me for bein’ such a tease!” you cry out in admission, halting the bouncing technique to roll your hips instead, the two of you groaning at the sensation.

“jesus, okay… well, i can definitely make that happen. you for sure deserve to be punished.” he babbles, pulling you closer — his eyes fluttering shut as you grind on him.

“are you g’nna punish me pope? for teasin’ you in our lessons?” your voice cracks desperately as you feel him repeatedly jutting against your g-spot, making your legs shake around him.

“yes. totally. i’ll punish you real good.” he spits out. it had been a while since he’d got his dick wet, especially from such a perfect princess — so all his concentration was going into making sure he didn’t bust right there and then. he simply agreed without thinking, he probably would have agreed to anything in that moment.

[howiscallmewhateveridctaken]

Lmfaooo what a week 😅

So a lot of people are, understandably, leaving the fandom. Drama like this always tends to put people off and unfortunately that affects the media they’ve come to love. I’m not going to be one of those people bc honestly, I don’t even know if I was ever that “in” the fandom in the first place to even leave it. My account isn’t and never was a nevermore account, yes I’ve made a few nevermore post but those were infrequent and amongst posts and reblogs of multiple other fandoms. I’m also in the discord server but I’ve only ever been a lurker, and usually only ever go in it when I want more context to something I’ve seen on tumblr. With that being said however, I still plan on reading nevermore when (or if) it continues because in THIS particular instance I can easily separate art from the artist and I’ll explain why in a moment.

Like I said I’m not and never have been very active in the fandom. I learned about this drama through a post from an account I follow and went through the server to find more context. I was not present through any of the actual conflicts but I’ve seen the conversations.

So why am I commenting on this?

Well mainly I want to make a point about para social relationships as well as moderation of servers and fandoms as a creator.

I just want to preface this by saying that after reading through all possible context, perspectives, takes and evidence I could find or come across, I genuinely don’t think red is necessarily a bad/morally wrong person. I DO however think she is in the wrong in this situation especially due to how she handled everything. As for how a lot of people are reacting to everything, there’s a couple of things I’d like to note:

From what I’ve seen, all of this is just one big thing of “he said/she said” and pointing fingers as well as just picking sides. If your absolutely distraught because red didn’t turn out to be the person you thought they were simply because she said things you didn’t like, I understand the disappointment and frustration but please remember that content creators in general aren’t your friends. You don’t know these people, they just do things you happen to like. Now I’m not saying you SHOULDN’T feel upset about it, it’s ok to and you even should if it’s an issue to you feel strongly about but please keep in mind that this isn’t a “sign of their true colors” or anything because you don’t know what they were actually like to begin with. Ofc I don’t mean that to say “expect the worst from people” but more as a reminder that can hopefully help you to look at the situation more critically and logically before jumping in guns blazing. It’s understandable if it affects you emotionally, you were emotionally invested in their work; but please realize this before you let it get to that point. Now on the other side of the coin, there’s the people who I feel as though will just pick the creators side simply because they’re fanboys and will stand by them no matter what. I’m DEFINITELY NOT saying that’s what everyone who’s on red side is, but naturally there’s bound to be a few that are going to dickride for the sake of dickriding. Regardless, there’s a lack of willingness to listen and understand from both sides (at least from what I’ve noticed) and that’s a problem because when no one wants to listen then what’s supposed to be a community coming together to resolve an issue just turns into a giant flame war. Also this should go without saying, but at least give the mods a chance. They obviously handled the whole situation horrendously but they aren’t going to do their jobs any better when they’ve got people coming at them with pitchforks.

Speaking of the moderators. I genuinely can’t wrap my head around how red and the other mods have managed to fumble this badly…….like it’s almost funny. All said and done they all had ONE very simple job and they blew it. Although I very much disagree with it, I do understand red’s decision to unban crimson. They wanted to give them a second chance, sure whatever. What I DONT GET is why would they not at the very least check to see if anyone else would be comfortable with a decision that would possibly affect them or even impact their safety. At the very least a warning to or a discussion with the victims would have been something. Not only that but even after they unban them, once red saw the NUMEROUS amount of people that were upset about it they, they should have immediately banned them again and then apologize after instead of some rushed explanation. But I get it stress gets the better of you. I understand their desire to keep things as transparent as possible (which i appreciate and I’m sure so do many others) but from that first apology/explanation it felt more like red trying to shake responsibility off themselves and pointing fingers in the guise of being transparent. I did see where red was trying to get at in her first statement, but there was also things that she honestly should have just had the foresight to realize wouldn’t put her in a better light, and this is aside from the victim blaming-esque wording. red basically says that she felt like a group of people (including Laci the one who reported crimson) were just out to get crimson, which is absolutely insane but then again it’s the internet so who knows. However it’s super clear that Laci obviously wasn’t lying bc the things she accused crimson of did in fact happen. So even bringing that up was enough for me to raise my eyebrow at but I digress. Then red practically says it was hard to handle the situation bc the evidence provided was censored, but Laci literally offered to give the uncensored versions so that was completely disingenuous on red’s part at best. To me it just seemed like the mods were looking for excuses for what could be there own laziness at best and negligence at worst. Their biggest fault so far is not being very good at actually listening to their audience and taking them into consideration. She also brought up that fact that Laci was apparently the only person to report crimson which I did not like to say the least. One of the victims confided in Laci and Laci brought it forward. I understand reds suspicions about Laci not being in the actual server where it happened but how are you going to immediately jump to “well why did no one else bring it up” instead of stopping for a sec and thinking “ hm clearly these victims feel uncomfortable stepping forward”. Which they had to do now anyway because of how bad the issue became. They should not have had to do that. Better it be just one person reporting, even if it’s someone you don’t like, than no one reporting and the issue persists under the radar.

And then there’s red’s formal apology…

First off, girl why are you dropping names??? A bunch of who are supposedly minors? Like let’s be so fucking for real right now😭

And then the audacity to be like “please don’t go after or dm these people” like babes if you were genuinely worried about them you wouldn’t have used their names at all. ESPECIALLY when in the end it was completely irrelevant and borderline inappropriate since it really had nothing to do with crimson, their actions or how you handled them. Not to mention the act of calling them “cliques” when literally all they were was side servers. Like if they’re cliques then what does that make red and everyone who’s on her side? It was very clearly just a biased reaction to people saying things she doesn’t like about her, which by all means she has the right to respond to but not in a way that is clearly trying to sway how everyone else sees them. The way red describes everything is as if it’s middle school drama and then proceeds to play directly into it. Don’t get me wrong her apology was fine, when she was ACTUALLY apologizing. Everything else felt like a last ditch effort to drag others under the bus with her. It was lowkey embarrassing to say the least.

Again, it’s important that I make it clear that I don’t believe red is a bad person. I just think she’s an immature person, or at least she is in how she handled everything and continues to handle it bc like I said I don’t know her, and don’t care to frankly. I didn’t start reading nevermore to be buddy buddy with her. Like if we look at the grand scope of things, this is a grown woman beefing with kids. Obviously they aren’t all kids, most of them aren’t I believe but she’s practically stooping down to school yard conflict in how she’s responded so far. Especially at one point in the server when she was being called out and jumped to “yeah I guess I’m the bad guy and totally evil. You all should hate me”. Like actually cut that shit out, what are you doing. I mean honestly.

And my final point because I’ve ranted long enough. I mentioned before that in this instance I am willing to separate the art from the artist, I stand by that because I genuinely do think this is a situation where red could hopefully grow from this and rectify things. The actual unbanning was a stupid and inconsiderate move on her part, but I don’t think she meant any ill-will or had any malicious intent. I disagree with the people calling her a r@pe apologist because that’s honestly just a huge reach. I’ve also seen some accusations of red and/or Flynn being racist, promoting inappropriate art knowing there’s minors around and from what I’ve seen it’s pretty iffy. Regarding the racism, I don’t believe that they are. Their characterizations of the characters regarding their ethnicities IS stereotypical and was obviously just very surface level research into those respective cultures but I chopped that up to ignorance rather than racism. As a woc I was frankly just relived they didn’t make the poc characters centered on some kind of discrimination or tragedy from their era, which yes is something that shouldn’t be ignored but also I don’t know if rednflynn could accurately and more importantly, respectfully portray those types of issues. Nor is it even their place tbh. With that being said however I don’t belong to most of the cultures the characters belong to. To me it never seemed like they were making a caricature out of these cultures, especially since their ethnicities are barely relevant to their stories anyway but I acknowledge that it’s not my place to deem what’s offensive or not.

As for the promoting inappropriate art of the characters and creating some themselves. Yeah they do. I’ve never been shocked about that nor did I think it was something that they are wrong for doing, I mean it’s their own work. Granted I didn’t realize how many minors were in the fandom but that’s literally every fandom, there’s only so much you could do about it. I don’t know if nevermore has a rating but it’s not like it was something ever promoted to be kid friendly, it’s obvious that some scenes are just straight up fan service. While I personally don’t like fan service it never was enough to impact the story so I personally never saw an issue. But point is I don’t think they should have to monitor what is and isn’t appropriate for minors but things get tricky when they have a server where they are clearly aware of minors.

And then there’s other things like people accusing them of promoting SA or some shit like that bc of a lot of stuff involving Montessor which frankly, that’s just a media literacy issue on the readers part. So yeah with that being said I don’t think red is a bad person, although I understand why a lot of people are done with them which is completely fair. I’m pretty much in a grey area about it, who knows if they end up getting in an even bigger scandal, hopefully they come out better from this but only time will tell. The best/smartest thing red has said throughout this entire debacle was that they’re taking a step back from the fandom. I think it’ll be good for everyone, especially them. It seems like it’ll take stress off them anyway. Plus the hole they’ve dug for themselves is already halfway to china by now so there’s that

[zerobaseone-zhanghao]

your body speaks for itself

tw: a little talk about sexy curvy women, a little suggestive maybe?, a little flirty fun, their hips don’t lie

a/n: hii guys! this is the first time I’ve ever written on tumblr and also the first time I’ve written wlw/bada content, it’s not insanely long but hopefully all goes well!

=====================================

Jam Republic is known for their ability to pull off mature, sexy concepts, what can they say? they are blessed with beautiful bodies. The other groups on SWF2 admire the girls for this especially bebe, with them also being on the younger side, they admire Jam’s talents when it comes to being sexy and pulling off sexy moves.

bebe’s leader Bada is very interested to learn more about sexy female empowerment type dance and who better to learn from than Jam.

Y/N is a member of Jam Republic, she is known for her sexyness in her dance but also just in general, she has an amazing body, her style is kinda like a mix of Redlic and Latrice. It’s obvious that this is who Bada wants to learn from.

The night prior, Y/N received a dm from Bada asking if she had any free time tomorrow to teach her a few sexy moves to which Y/N replied yess with the time she had free and told Bada that she was looking forward to teaching her.

Bada walks into the agreed practice room to see that Y/N is already waiting for her “let’s get started” “yes teacher”, they stand in front of the mirror as Y/N begins to show Bada a few sexy tricks to make others fall for her. She begins rolling her hips as Bada follows, she seems a bit stiff, she looks tense too, she makes her way towards Bada, standing behind her, looking at her in the mirror. They make eye contact, “can I help you?” Y/N asks politely which makes Bada automatically nod, she grabs Bada’s small waist, slightly stroking her before moving up to her shoulders, running her hands up and down her arms to calm her down.

“You’re so tense, just relax, I don’t bite” she whispers making Bada shudder, Y/N’s hands trail back down to Bada’s waist, helping her to move more freely, she admires Bada’s waist as it moves with her hips. She quickly snaps out of her trance when Bada asks if she’s doing okay, “umm yep you’re doing great!” “are you okay?” Bada asks “yeah yeah no I’m okay” Bada smirks seeing her cheeks go red

“Am I making you shy?” “No.. maybe.. a little” “for being the sexiest member of Jam Republic, you’re very cute” Bada says making Y/N’s cheeks even more red “s-stop” Bada gets bold and backs her into the wall, propping her hands at the sides of Y/N’s head “can I kiss you?” Bada asks “please” she whispers, Bada leans in and connects they’re lips, they’re soft and plump, she wraps her arms around Bada’s neck pulling her closer deepening the kiss, they break away once they are out of breath “did I do a good job today, teacher?” “I’m pretty sure your body speaks for itself”

[kurosstuff]

Here I am back with another request, anyway : "Headcanon"

Hazbin gals(all of them if you could, emily included) react to R that likes to follow then around. Reader was just on the couch and maybe Charlie or Lute or anyone had to go elsewhere and R just follows them, no particular reason just that R wants to be near them but not to the point of irritation.

I'm gonna make it for 5 of the ladies so it's not so insanely long BUT if you have any specific ladies you wish to see? You can request again! Hopefully these are good! Half of them I'm still learning to write for still-

Also! Sorry for not writing- it's summer and I've just been incredibly burnt out so been writing once in a while. Also. I didn't see the Emily part until after I wrote this- I'm sorry

Warning(s): slight angst in some parts but mostly fluff, all bur sera has drabbles

Hazbin ladies(charlie,vaggie,Lute, rosie and Sera) x reader: headcanons!

Charlie

By far the most excited about it- her lover(or friend) following her around? She 100% does it back! Like a lost little puppy she adores you by her side no matter what it is she's doing.

Just talking your ear off from the plans she has for the hotel. Future dates. Whatever comes to mind? She tells you excitedly just wanting to see your reaction. Her number one supporters option matters the most to her.

But because of that she gives surprises away.. to often.

"-then! After~ I'm taking you to that lovely bakery-" she went kn and on- walking as you trailed after her like usual. Smiling heartfully. She was doing it again- talking about the plans she had for your date tonight. From the beginjng of the day to now she was a bundle of joy- babbling about things you were sure your not supposed to know.

"-then I'll get on my knee and pull the box out-"

Your grin widen at that comment you heard. Humming you kept quiet no longer listening to safe the surpise. A proposal? Now that's something your more then happy to keep a secret from knowing

When she would babble you kept quiet. Not telling her the stuff you knew. No matter what it was. You knew how she was. How excitable shed get.

She did never find out she gave the proposal away

Vaggie

She's suspicious, as hell over, literally everyone. Outside and INSIDE the hotel. Understandably, so - given you both in hell. Doesn't matter if you're stronger than her. Or what you are

She will NOT. Allow you to wander off without you in her sight. No matter what. Especially since the hotel is a clear hot spot for danger. She'd actually lowkey ENCOURAGE you following her about. Inviting you places or if comes down to it? Following you.

Standing up Vaggie sighed cursing under her breath at yet another sexual comment Angel made. Scowling lowly turning glancing over at you- smiling in approval once you trailed behind her on instinct- which let to her ranting to you on what she encountered

"Do you wanna cuddle?" You spoke up leading her to your shared room watching her slowly relaxing.

Vaggie is a worrier. Even in her sights, she just looks around cautious everyone

To be honest- I think she'd prefer you following her around. Makes her "job" at being your protector so much more easier.

Worried about the what ifs. The when's. But she knows your strong- she's seen it. She just can't help but worry- after all. Your her lover. She can't help herself but worry.

Lute

We see her with Adam(assuming she's around him ALOT) she truly wouldn't be to bothered hanging out with ypu 24/7 cause she does love you and for her? Having you in her sights is better then assuming your fine and healthy

Of course it's not unhealthy - she trusts you'd take care of yourself. Trust that you're capable of saving yourself if it comes down to it. But it means a lot to see you wanting to be with her-

Lute adores it- she won't SAY it but she feels prideful when you wander beside her. Following her everywhere

"So.. where are we going~?" You hummed, snickering at her jolt, ignoring the glare she sent your way, grumbling loudly at you. You were just asleep an hour ago. Now here you are trailing after her as if you didn't just see her a while ago

"..training. come on if your up you can work out."

It's also not like she does the same thing either. Just instinctively trailing you- just anywhere either of you are? The other is certainly close by

Rosie

Honestly like most ladies in the list she may actually prefer it- after all her town is full of cannibals itching to dig into you. Literally-

Doesn't matter if your a lover or not. They'll be tempted or swayed in a way to try and take a bite. But if Rosie is around? They'd never attempt it. Never dare upset her.

Rosie also takes this chance to use this as a tea spilling time. Talk about the latest drama. The rumors- anything and everything the two of you share together no matter what it is.

A laugh escaped you both as you ate your share of the snacks she brought with "-oh darling I wish you saw it! Poor Alastor was covered in the flour~ he was so mad" Rosie laughed covering her mouth with her hand like usual grinning at you before smirking

"Oh~? Now I know that look~ the look of more tea~?"

Nodding, she hummed, sipping her tea before putting it down, "I heard.. from a certain soemone.. the king himself? Lucifer? Did it~ to win the..bet they had"

Sera

Now she's the only one so far on this list that will not let you follow her EVERYWHERE. she is a Seraphim. The highest level itself. The lord himself daughter(I think? May be wrong) so there's places she'd wish you could come but you just can't.

For yours and her safety.

She does not wanna be the next fallen. No matter how she adores you- she loves heaven- she can not commit a crime. Allow you in certain meetings witness things..

But she will allow it sometimes. Especially given her status it may be hard- to hang out with one another.

Sera never worries about your safety. Your in Heaven! The safest place(she has guards tailing you secretly worried about the impure influences that dome angels can have- adam)

Once in your shared home? Your free to follow hwr everywhere she is. It makes her happy seeing you constantly- makes what she's doing to ensure heavens saftey(dispite being not the purest option) so much more worth it.

[celestialkiri]

Hello, I found you due to the Journey to the West content you made on your other dedicated blog, and I must say I absolutely fell in love.

I was wondering if your content was still active because I had so much joy reading about Sophie and your version of Sun Wukong. And I’d love to continue reading and learning about them and seeing the beautiful art you’ve created.

As well as maybe throwing out some “what if”scenarios myself

But if you’ve closed that chapter of your art, I will respect it and refrain.

Hello! I'm glad that you love my JTTW art on my JTTW AU blog! It brings me so much joy! I will say that I am still active! But because in my real life, I am a trainee and soon I will get a permanent job it takes a lot of my energy so I admit that I have been fighting a big art blog. Still- I am active and I am not planning on leaving JTTW fandom! Hopefully when I get used to working and everything I will get my energy back on drawing! As for the "what if" and questions in my inbox, I have closed them because I get SO MANY of them on my other blog that I simply could not have time to answer all of them and it started to stress me out a little bit I admit 😅 I also don't want others to send me messages on inbox and never get an answer so I figured it's better to close it. BUT I AM ALIVE! I just need to kick this art blog or maybe I will just accept the fact that I want to focus on my job and I will just post more rarely, but it doesn't mean I am dead. 😭🤔🫡😅

Hope you have a good day!

[impala-dreamer]

Meet Me At The Beach

A Supernatural Story

~ Texting and emails can feel so impersonal. There's nothing quite like exchanging tangible, handwritten letters with someone you love...~

Dean Winchester x F!Reader, Sam Winchester

4,025 Words

Warnings: Bittersweet Angst. SFW. 

A/N: This is for @jacklesversebingo "Writing Letters To Each Other" was the prompt. I hope you enjoy...

June 2

Dear Dean, 

This feels so weird. Do people really write letters anymore? Am I going to get strange looks at the post office when I go to buy a stamp? Will they even know what to do with this tiny envelope and folded piece of loose-leaf paper? I almost don’t know how to write anymore. My script looks kinda like chicken scratch, huh? Hopefully it’ll get better. It is weird not typing though. But emails just seem like work. Impersonal, ya know? Besides, it gives us something to look forward to when we hit the mailbox. Nice to open something that’s not a delinquent credit card bill, huh? 

Speaking of which- how the fuck do you do it? I just got another card canceled. My credit is non-existent. Fuck, I need to get a job. Could you imagine me in an office? High heels and panty hose and my hair tucked into a neat, matronly bun? I shudder to think! 

OK, this is weird. I just wanted to write “LOL” but it’s not an email. Or a text. Why are we doing this again? Oh, yeah, see above. 

Anyhoo- - - - I don’t even know what to say! Umm… I’m in New Orleans for a bit. Not working, just hanging out. My friend Emily from high school tracked me down online and we’ve been chatty. She’s in a band. They’re not bad. Not great, but not bad. So yeah, I took a drive down to see a show and I’m just lingering. Drinking too much, sleeping past noon. It’s fun. Nice little vacation. 

Which - ahem - you should be taking. When are you gonna get your ass out of that dusty old bunker and stick your toes in the sand? I already told you I’d meet you in Pensacola with sunscreen and a cooler of beer. You know you want to. Or are you just scared to show off your ugly toes in flip flops? Your boots might actually cry if you ever took them off, so I guess it’s just as well. 

Hey, do you remember that night in Richmond when it started pouring and your boots sank into the mud puddle? God, that was a mess. We were soaked to the bone. Nice way to warm up, though - cuddled in the back of the Impala. I miss that car. Sometimes, I think I can hear it at night when the world is quiet and the wind is still. It’s like the engine roars in the back of my mind and I start thinking about all our adventures, all the time we spent driving into the sunset. 

I miss you. Is that wrong? I probably shouldn’t. Or at least, I shouldn’t tell you that I do. But I do. I miss you so bad sometimes that it hurts. Like someone has punched me right in the chest. Maybe we can end up in the same town soon. Grab some tacos and sit on the hood. Make a mess. I’d like that. 

OK, before I get too emotional and start asking you to run away with me, I think I’ll end this ranting scribble of horrid handwriting. 

Write me back soon.

Love, Y/N

June 21 

Y/N- 

Your handwriting does not look like chicken scratch. I like it. Mine is like some toddler just learning his letters. Whatever. I never learned that fancy shit. I can sign my name and make a grocery list. That’s all I need. 

This is weird, yeah. But it’s kinda nice. Feels more… like you’re here. Does that make sense? Like seeing your handwriting, the dents in the paper- I don’t know. Just feels more real. Like you’re not just some computer talking back at me. Also there’s something strange about answering questions weeks later. I meant to write this sooner, but I got a little distracted. There was a Kung Fu marathon on and I just lost track of time. Too much pizza, not enough Carradine. Ya know? You know. 

Remember that horrible motel in Raleigh when we both caught that nasty stomach bug and stayed up all night watching old tv shows? Saltines and Little House. I’ll never forget it. You were so sick that day. Shit, I was sure I was gonna end up taking you to the hospital. Sure, I was puking too, but you looked like death. I hated that. Hated that I couldn’t help you, make you feel better. I did cook up a mean chicken noodle soup though, didn’t I? Not that it stayed down for long. 

Thank god for that yellow Gatorade. And yes- it’s fucking yellow. Not green. 

Anyway- I miss you too. I try not to, I really do. Not all the time, no offense, but sometimes I’m just fucking insane with shit going on. But at night, especially, I miss having you beside me. I miss rolling over and seeing you there, or hearing you snore. I miss feeling your freezing feet under the blanket. I don’t know, I just- 

What can I say? I’m sorry. I’m an asshole. I’m the biggest piece of shit in the universe. I shouldn’t have pushed you away. 

Can’t change the past. Just gotta move on. 

Maybe someday you’ll forgive me. I hope so anyway. 

I’m sorry. I shouldn’t dump that all out in a letter. I almost ripped this all up and started over. I actually let it sit for a day before I came back to it. But, fuck it- we said we were gonna write to each other and be honest, and here I am, being honest. 

Fuck, I’m so tired. That kinda tired when sleeping for ten days wouldn’t even put a dent in it. Yeah, OK, so things are getting a little better. Chuck’s gone for good this time. Jack’s got things back in place, even made a few improvements. Sam’s- well, he’s Sam. He’s fine, doing his thing. The dog is- did I tell you we have a dog now? Yeah, I know. Me and a dog- yeah right. But we do. Miracle. He’s a good boy. I’ll send you a picture soon. 

Never thought I could slow down like this. Feels like for the first time we can just - work. I mean, I’m never gonna give up hunting, not totally, but- feels like I could just ease back a bit. Been looking at some jobs in town- nothing crazy, fixing engines and stuff like that. Don’t know if you remember, but I’m pretty good with my hands. 

Did you blush? 

You did. 

OK. I guess- that’s it for now. I have no fucking idea how to end this so - bye?

~ Dean

P.S.  I’ll meet you at the beach soon. I promise.

Fifteenth of July 

To Whom It May Concern:

Re: Beach Vacation

Dear Mr. Winchester, 

I am very pleased to hear that you are agreeable to meeting me at the beach. It should be delightful fun to run through the surf and hunt for sea glass with you.

Oh shit! Do you remember that new age shop in… where the fuck was that? With the sea glass necklaces in the window that I said were so pretty and the witch inside said they were blessed to give the wearer riches or some shit like that. Where was that? Who knows.

Feels like we’ve been all over the world together. Well, this country at least. Lord knows I could never get you on an airplane. If only you could drive to Paris. Did I ever tell you about my trip to France? God, it was beautiful. Rained the whole time, but it was this beautiful, warm spring rain that made everything smell like dust and petals. Not rose petals, but those little white ones that grow on trees, ya know? It was so beautiful. Fuck it. I’m taking you one day. You need to see more than the dash of your car and the backroads of America. Time to travel!

Speaking of- I’m glad you’re slowing down a bit. I know that won’t be easy for you but if you think about it, you’ve spent the last forty years running from problem to problem like a damned bomb-sniffing dog. 

A DOG?! Dean Winchester, I never thought the day would come. I can’t wait to see a picture. Don’t forget it next time. 

I think you’d be a great mechanic. It was always very hot seeing you covered in sweat and grease especially if you had those damned coveralls on. I mean… what? I don’t think about you like that anymore, you know. It’s over and done with and we’re just friends. We are friends, aren’t we? Maybe something more than friends, I guess. Ex lovers? Ew. I hate that word. Lovers. So gross. Well, then what are we? Just two souls swimming in a fish bowl…

Year after year. Day after day. Do you know that I put nearly a hundred thousand miles on my poor truck this year? Back and forth, up and down the country. I don’t have to tell you how exhausting it is. Fun, but exhausting. Rewarding, but not. I wonder how many people remember me after I leave? Does that family in New Haven think about me whenever they go into the basement and it’s no longer haunted? Is there a photo of me on a fridge in Wilmington where I saved that guy’s fiance from the vamp nest? Probably not. I’m sure people remember you - The Great Dean Winchester. The sexy hunter with the green eyes and the giant black car. You’re hard to forget. Also, you hang out with a giant. Tell Sam I said hi. 

I do remember that puke fest! And it’s green. It’s literally neon green. Fight me. 

We could probably write a book, you and me. ‘Winchester & Y/L/N Do America’. It’s a coffee table book with pictures of random diner signs and gas station bathrooms. Maybe a list of the country’s best french fry places. Shit like that. Let’s do it. I’ll call my literary agent in the morning. Ha!

SPARTA!! That’s where that damned sea glass shop was. It just hit me! Stupid brain. I swear, I’ve been hit in the head way too many times. Broken too many bones. I’m getting too old for this shit. Did you know that my left knee pops whenever I stand up now? Like, how old am I?? I can’t stand it. I need a month at a spa somewhere in the desert. That’d be nice. 

Damnit. I just got a call from Vinnie Alverez. Do you know him? Hunter out of Pittsburg. Anyway- he needs help on a job. Guess I’ll cut this letter short. Hopefully I’ll find a box to drop this in on the way to PA! 

Miss you. 

Sincerely yours, 

Y/N

P.S. - I do forgive you, Dean. Of course I do. Things were just too hard back then. Life didn’t want to cooperate for us. It’s not your fault. Not my fault. It just was. Please don’t carry that guilt in your heart. You deserve better than that. 

August 2

Dear Y/N- 

You’re a real character, you know that? Love the corporate letter. I’m in for the book by the way. Could be awesome. We do need a full chapter on onion rings though. Make a note. 

I heard about your hunt in Pittsburgh. Came through the grapevine that you kicked some serious wolf ass. Nice job, kid. Hope you’re being careful. I know how bullheaded and impulsive you can get when you’re in the zone. Just watch your back, OK? Promise me. Last thing I wanna hear is that you got your heart clawed out or you’re walking around with a demon in your ass. 

Demons. Haven’t seen so many running around lately. Queen Rowena’s been keeping them in check. So fucking weird that she’s in charge now. Not that I’m surprised- she’s a badass bitch. If I had a nickel for every ruler of hell I was friends with, I’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it happened twice. The kids still say that, don’t they? See, I’m not old. I keep up with pop culture and shit. Started watching the tik toks. I still don’t get it, but I like the woodturning stuff. Thinking about taking up whittling. Maybe carve you a keychain so you stop losing them. 

I got a call for a job interview. Chickened out though. I don’t know if I’m ready to start all that, ya know? Start a real life in the real world- just seems- I don’t know, scary. Yeah, I’ve faced every deadly thing on this and other worlds but the idea of getting a 9 to 5 civilian job scares me. I’m some kinda fucked up, huh? 

I think about it a lot though. Getting a job, finding a little house somewhere, settling down. A little fenced in yard so Miracle can run around and dig up dirt. Might put a rocking chair on the porch and watch the clouds, some shit like that. Would you come visit me in my Barbie dream house? I’ll cook you breakfast every morning and you can rub my feet at night. Real cozy couple stuff. 

OK, so maybe I’m thinking about you more and more these days. Maybe I’m regretting leaving. Maybe I’m just an idiot daydreaming about meeting you somewhere in the middle and sweeping you off your feet. One of those running hugs that hurts when you collide but ends in a kiss that makes everything feel better. I’m a real romantic fuck, huh? I was digging through my drawers yesterday and I found a pair of your socks. Those tiny ones that barely covered your ankle. I don’t know why they were stuffed in the back of the dresser, but there they were. Dingy white socks with the pink threads on the toes. I’ll bring them to the beach when we meet up. 

Oh, Sam says hi and he hopes you’re good and he wants you to shoot him a text when you can. You can do what you want, but you better not mail him a letter. That’s just for me. God, my hand is cramping up. I’m not used to this. Oh, and you’re not alone. My knee creaks like a haunted house when I go up stairs now. And my right wrist pops, and my neck makes this weird almost squeaking sound, and my ass- well, I could go on, but just know you’re not alone. Kinda weird to think that we lived long enough to be this old, ain’t it? I never thought I’d live to be thirty and here I am staring down 42. Forty Fucking Two. Can you believe that shit? Goddamnit I got old. Let’s go find a nursing home together. Maybe we can get a double room- or a king sized bed?

Think about it. We could be cranky old people together. Losing our memories and shuffling around with walkers and shit. You’d look cute with white hair. And fuck, my beard’s already going gray. Should I grow out my beard? 

Write back soon. I really like seeing your letters in the box. 

Dean  x

My dearest Dean Winchester, it is with great happiness that I write this letter to you and I do hope that it finds you well and happy and all good things and I can’t keep this formal shit up. Ha!

Anyway- but yeah, things are good. I know it’s been a while since I’ve written, but I was on a little trip around the continent. Headed up to Montreal for a bit. Killed some nasties, salted some bones, generally fucked around. My beloved truck crapped out in Burlington, Vermont, so I had to hang out there for a while and gather my resources to get a new vehicle. I think you’d like her. Green Ford Explorer from ‘94. OK, she’s not as sexy as the Impala, but she gets me where I need to go. Which, apparently, was Maine! I met up with some friends in Greenville. Cute little town full of witchcraft. So much fun. Also had a lobster roll on a pier… I swear to god, they plucked this thing right out of the water and slapped it on a buttered roll. You’d LOVE it. I’m gonna take you there someday. 

Speaking of- We need to make plans for Florida. I picked up a little bikini on my travels and I think I really need to show it off. Maybe you could be my bodyguard and keep the creeps away while I’m sunbathing? To repay you for your services, I’ll gladly let you take it off me at night…

Oh, and I’ve thought about this extensively, and I believe that you should, in fact, grow your beard out. Like, full on, bushy lumberjack beard. I can’t wait to see all that gray. You know I have a thing for older men… and you’ll always be older than me, Dean Winchester and don’t you forget it!

And for your information, I don’t lose my keys anymore! I got one of those… apple taggy things. Now I know where they are at all times. Can’t find my phone to find them sometimes, but that’s another issue. 

Two weeks later, I’m picking up my pen again. Sorry this is taking forever. Things are stupid busy. I wish I could just… put this fucking gun down and go live with you on a farm somewhere. Not a working farm, we wouldn’t keep pigs or anything because gross, but a farmhouse in the middle of nowhere. Big white house with a giant tree in the yard and a tire swing and a picket fence and a kid chasing the dog around and - 

Shit. Do you ever think about it? I do. A lot. More than I’d like to and it fucking cuts me up inside every time. I know we could never have kept it, and life- I mean- it just wasn’t meant to be. But I do think about it sometimes. Imagine if we’d just walked away from the life and tried to be a family? Impossible, I know. Maybe in another life. 

Shit, I’m sorry. Fuck. Ignore me. I haven’t slept in a while and I just

I want to see you. Can we meet somewhere? Wherever you want. I’ll come to you. 

~ Y/N 

Dear Dean, 

This is my second attempt at writing this. Crumpled up the first one because I’m an idiot. Am I an idiot? Did I piss you off with the last letter? I honestly didn’t mean to. I just- we said we’d be honest, and you’ve been so open in your letters that I thought it was ok to talk about, but I guess not. I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have dug that stuff up. 

I’m so tired and stressed and I miss you so much. Since we’ve been writing back and forth it’s almost like I can’t stop thinking about you. I get so fucking excited to check the mail whenever I roll back into town. It’s like… I don’t know, it’s like Christmas every time I see your handwriting in my box. Remember the time you wrote your name on my thigh in Sharpie? That stayed on for like a week. I shoulda gotten it inked on. That’d be something, huh? Branded by a Winchester. 

Fuck, Dean, I really hope you’re not mad at me. I really want to call you, but we said we wouldn’t. Just write me back, please. 

I’ll be in your neck of the woods next week. Got turned onto a haunting up in Abilene. Maybe we can meet on the road somewhere? Please? 

Hey, did you know there’s a Hunter, Kansas? Wonder why they didn’t build the bunker there. I don’t know, made me laugh when I was looking at the map. 

Anyway- Please write me back. Or call. Or text. Or send a damned pigeon with a tiny letter taped to its foot. I don’t care, how, just do it please. Even if you’re mad at me and don’t want to talk anymore, I get it. But please. Just let me know, OK?

I’m sorry. 

Love, Y/N

Dear Y/N,

I didn’t know you and my brother were writing to each other like this, but I found your last few letters to him in his private P.O. Box. I didn’t even know he had one of his own, but I guess we all keep secrets from those we love. I hope you don’t mind that I read your letters. Not all of them, but the last two that came through. Please know that Dean would have responded if he could have, I know he would have. He talked about you a lot recently. Said you two were in contact and that he was hoping to find some time to meet you for a vacation. I don’t know where you guys were planning on going, but I found a new Hawiian shirt in his closet with the tags still on it. 

I know we spoke on the phone after he passed, but I wanted to send this to you. I was cleaning up his stuff and found his notepad. Looks like he’d started a letter before we left for Canton. I think he’d want you to have it. 

I’m closing up the Bunker soon. I don’t really know where I’ll go, but I can’t be here right now. Not without my brother. 

I’ll always be around if you need anything or want to talk. I’ll always answer the phone for you, Y/N. 

Be well,

Sam Winchester

Y/N/N, 

If I could take it back I would. Every fucking word. I think about it now and I know we made the wrong choice. I know we could have made it work if we tried. But we are both total fuck ups who can’t be normal. We just can’t. 

Forgive me

That’s dog slobber up there, not tears. Just fyi. Definitely not tears. I think I might have been a little drunk when I started writing and then well-

Anyway- Maine sounds awesome. We were there once but no time for lobster rolls. Guess I missed out. 

Not much to report since the last letter. Been kinda quiet here. But… I did apply for a job. Well, I filled out the application. Well, I started filling it out. It’s actually underneath this notepad right now. I’ll get to it. I will. I just need a good kick in the ass. Or maybe a pinch… wink wink

I absolutely think we need to get together. Pick some place stupid like the World’s Largest Frying Pan or South of The Border. I’ll meet you. Just say when. 

Guess this letter will take a little longer to finish. We’re leaving for Ohio in a little bit. There’s a buncha vampire dicks making a mess. Gonna take ‘em to batting practice. Show them my machete swing. I’ll give a full report when we’re back home

Dean Dean, 

I made it to the beach. It’s hot, like stupid hot. Had to stand in the water just to keep my toes from burning. I’ve been sitting here for hours trying to think of something to say, but all I can say is I love you. I miss you. I wish you were here with me. I wish things had been different. I wish and wish and wish. 

If I throw this into the ocean will it get to you somehow or will my words just wash away like the sand? 

I’ll see you again someday. I hope so, anyway. Let’s just pretend I’m destined for Heaven. I know you’re up there. You were too good not to be. You sacrificed so much, cared so much, saved so many people. I know you made it. If there’s any mercy in this universe, I’ll be up there someday too. Just don’t have too much fun without me. 

I love you, Dean. Always. 

Y/N

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[migueloharaslave]

Miguel x Black!reader

NSFW WARNING 🗣‼️

You stood in the kitchen, cooking a meal for you and your boyfriend. You and Miguel have been together for three years already, you honestly had the best relationship.. you couldn't ask for more a man to spoil you and treat you like the queen you are. But, right now you were mad at him.

Usually you two called whenever you got off of work, but he didn't anwser.. he hadn't been answering any of your calls, you huffed as you felt your face heat up. You were so angry with that damn man. Then, you heard the front door close, the sound of Miguel grunting as he sat down his work bag.

"Baby!" Miguel called out, he looked around a little bit before spotting you in the kitchen. "I'm sorry mamas, I was busy with work baby." He walked up to you."Save it. Ion feel like hearing it." You rolled your eyes, looking up at him with furrowed brows.

"I've been calling you all day, not a single text. I don't care how busy you were, still learn how to fucking answer me." You crossed your arms at him.

"C'mon baby, I'm sorry.. Let me make it up to you." Miguel whispered as he pulled a braid behind your ear, gently bringing his hands up to the side of your face, holding it in his hands. He dragged his thumb against your dark skin, obviously since you were a blackie he couldn't notice that you were blushing, he could only feel the heat radiating off of your skin. "C'mon baby, don't be like that with me." He whispered as he kissed you.

"Stopp.." You giggled, you couldn't even keep up the rude act as much as you wanted to because of how he was acting. "Oh my god whatever, I forgive you. Okay?" You hummed. "Can you help me clean up the dishes after dinner?"

"Of course baby, I'll do anything for you.. Shii, I'll even kill for you." Miguel snickered as he kissed you gently, pulling away as he looked at what you made for dinner.

He grabbed a fork before picking up some pieces of ravioli you made and ate it. "Miguel!" You playfully hit him with a kitchen towel, "Go wash your hands. You just got off of work, plus you smell sweaty please go shower or something you're gonna have the whole house stankin'."

"Okay, I don't smell THAT bad, exaggerating shit baby. I'll go shower real quick though, hopefully you made up that bed because tonight we bout to mess it up tonight." Miguel smirked as he smacked your ass.

"Yknow what, you aint getting a lick of this." You giggled, placing a hand on your hip. "All of this belongs to my future husband."

"Am I gonna be that future husband? I better be." Miguel walked up to you, grabbing your waist, fiddling with the waist beads you were wearing.

"Yeah.. You're gonna be him. I'll be Y/N O'Hara one day.." You giggled as you pecked a kiss on his lips, biting your lip as you held onto the collar of his shirt. "Please go shower though, I'm not having sex with you when you aint smelling good."

"God, I need some of that chocolate.. Today has just been crazy." Miguel muttered, as he pressed a kiss to your cheek, unbuttoned his shirt as he started to walk off. "I was doing my job.. then I had made this substance, it fell, and god that was so hard to clean up. Because it was like an acid, then we were running tests.. some guy's hair somehow got into this boiling liquid and it just exploded."

You side eyed miguel as he was telling you about his day you couldn't help but whisper 'what the hell'. Miguel pulled off his shirt and sighed, stretching his muscles. "After my shower can I have a massage?"

"Mm.. Of course baby, go get washed up. I'll take good care of you." You blew a kiss at him with a big grin on your face before walking to the bed room, getting some body oil for the massage. You laid down across the bed as you waited for him to be down, kicking your feet in the air as you watched the news.

.. After a good 20 minutes, Miguel walked into the room, looking down at you on the bed. "Sorry, I was shaving my face." Miguel muttered as he looked at himself in the mirror.

"It's fine, you sat up on your knees, smiling up at him. "Oh my godd.. I need to tell you something that happend at the bakery. Okay so I was at work right, doing my job like usually.. this customer decided she wanted to have a fucking problem." You rolled your eyes in annoyance as Miguel sat down in front of you, just listening to your rant.

"I don't know it just really pissed me off. I made her a cake just as she requested with dinosaurs and sharks for her little boy's birthday party along with some cupcakes. She fucking told me, 'Sharks weren't around when dinosaurs were.' Bitch I do my research, I told her she can look it up they did exist around the same time. It shouldn't be that deep it was a cake for your sons birthday party." You started to put some oil on his back, gently massaging it into his skin as you applied pressure to some spots, releasing tension in his muscles.

"Baby, you wanna know something else she did?" You peeked over his shoulder at him.

"Mhm.." Miguel mumbled. His eyes closed as you massaged his muscles, he enjoy the feeling of your hands on him and the tension leaving his body. He could care less about what you were talking about, but you always listened to him so he just did the same.

"This girl literally expected me to give her a refund. Like, no baby. I made it, your son is happy. You told me how you wanted the cake and I made it. Then, she threatened to call the cops on me for scamming her? Like what? She should had been calling the cops for help to get me off of her cuz I was really about to beat her ass. Like, your son is happy, you should be worried about that. Hopefully her son has a good birthday party." You continued to massage Miguel's skin.

"Yeah.." Miguel grunted a bit.

"Y'know.. I want kids one day. I bet we would make some pretty babies." You hummed, tilting your head down at him.

Miguel eyes suddenly shot open, "Now? You want a kid now?" He turned around to look at you, "Are you sure..? I don't think we're ready for that."

"Baby, not right now. I'm just saying. When we get married, I wanna have a kid, maybe two.. three.. five.. ten." You giggled as you joked.

"One or two, or maybe three kids would be fine.. I don't think I could handle more than that, especially with my job." He muttered, scratching the back of his neck.

"You'll be a great dad, but I guess I wouldn't be the only one calling you daddy anymore if we do have kids." You dragged your hands down his chest, gliding your hands up against his muscle.

"I- Oh.." Miguel cleared his throat as his face heat up at your random comment, making your brows furrow.

"Your scalp look dry." You muttered as you started to pick through his hair.

"So?" Miguel muttered.

"Hold on." You scooted off of the bed standing up and walking over to the table in the room, picking up some hair oil and walking back over to him, sitting down on his lap. You bit down on your lip as you squirmed around a bit on his lap.

"Ight, stop." Miguel mumbled, placing his hands on your hips, as he looked up at you. He always enjoyed it when you were on top of him, probably one of his favorite positions. When you leaned over him to apply oil to his scalp, of course you purposely pressed your breast up against him.

After you put some oil onto his scalp you gently massaged it in, gently moving your hips up and down on his lap, that was starting to drive Miguel crazy. He couldn't help but grip onto your ass as he felt himself grow hard.

"Done!" You smiled as you got up, looking at him up and down as you sat the oil down on the table, looking at yourself in the mirror, looking back at him.

Miguel was staring at you his legs were spread out a bit as he locked eyes with you, the way he stared at you whenever he got horny was honestly crazy. You knew that look from Houston to Tokyo. "Mm.. What's wrong with you? Need something?"

"I do need something.. I want some of that chocolate." He smirked at you, he watched as you walked up to him, getting down on your knees in front of him.

You giggled as you gently pulled down his boxers, looking up at him. You bit down on your lip as you saw the way it sprung right out of his boxers. Sometimes you forgot how big Miguel was, and this was one of them days where you forgot, you two haven't banged in almost two weeks due to him having low energy and being stressed from work.

You wrapped your hand around his length, gently stroking it as you looked up at him. He had a pretty decent size probably 12 inches at most, but you never really measured it. It was two toned, so there should be no surprise the tip held a soft pink hue along with some bulging veins on the side.

"Just like that.." Miguel whispered, narrowing his eyes at you, he mostly wanted you to suck him off right now, he hated when you teased him.You then started to swirl your tongue up against his tip before pushing your head down, taking his length inside of your mouth. Miguel waited for you to start sucking a bit before he gathered your braids into a ponytail and started thrusting himself inside of your mouth, pushing his cock to the back of your throat receiving a gag in response.

Miguel didn't stop, you looked up at him with tears in your eyes. You gripped onto his thighs and after a couple minutes like this you heard him starting to groan which meant he was already close. You just let Miguel abuse your throat, he needed to take all his stress out on you. He did some quick few thrusts in your mouth before panting and pulling out.

"Stick out your tongue." He demanded, and you did so as you felt him grip tighter onto your hair and using his free hand to stroke himself until he came on your face. He leaned his head back as he let out a grunt, "Fuck.." He whispered. Letting go of your hair and panting.

"Ugh.." You muttered, standing up and looking in the mirror. He aimed for any spot but your mouth, you took some tissue and tried to wipe it off. "Maybe next time go for the damn mouth. I didn't want my makeup to get messed up." You pouted.

"I'm sorry, ma.." Miguel sat up, looking at you. "Cmon, bring your pretty ass over here. We ain't done." Miguel patted the spot right next to him as his length throbbed.

You rolled your eyes as you threw the tissue away and walked over to him, sitting down. You looked into Miguel's eyes, tilting your head. "What else are we gonna do?"

Miguel leaned in, kissing your neck gently before dragged his hands down, caressing your thighs. "I was thinking about you all day.." Miguel chuckled, he looked at you before he tossed you back on the bed. He started tugging down your leggings and you helped him do so, once he got them off he tossed them aside. Miguel leaned down, pecking a kiss on your inner thigh as he looked up at you. "God.. I've missed being between your thighs." Miguel whispered as he pecked a kiss against your clothed cunt, giggling as he felt your hips thrust up a little.

Miguel then took your panties off, exposing your wet cunt. He gently pressed his thumb against your clit, rubbing circles in that area gently. You sat up on the bed a bit, pressing your back against the headboard as you looked down at him, biting down on your lip. "Mm.." You brought your hand down and started to play with his dark hair. Miguel leaned in, licking your folds before he thrusted his tongue inside, pushing tongue in and out lapping up your juices, and exploring every inch of your walls. He pushed your thighs open since you kept trying to close them, closing his eyes as he got into it.

He hummed against your folds which sent vibrations against your senstive cunt, you let out a soft moan as you gripped onto the sheet. Miguel then started to play with you clit, he flattened out his tongue, opening his eyes to look up at you as he shook his head from side to side, rubbing his tongue up against your sensitive bud. He brought one of his hands up and gently started playing with your breast, grazing his rough fingertip against your chestnut nipples, starting to drive you crazy."Fuckk.." You whispered, looking down at him as your thighs gently squeezed his head.

"Oh baby.." You whispered, "Please.. more I want more." You whispered as you gently gripped onto his hair. Miguel did just as you wanted, slipping two fingers inside, pushing them as deep as they can go. He started off at a nice, gentle pace before quickly thrusting his fingers in and out in your slick causing a gasp to escape from your lips.

"Good girll..~" Miguel brought himself up, pressing his forehead up against your head. "Had an attitude with me earlier, mami.. then you decided to go on and tease me, as if I would let that slide.." Miguel whispered, the faint sounds of his fingers thrusting into your wet cunt was starting the feel the room. "Huh? What was that? You ain't got nothing to say? Talking all that shit.. and now look at you, speechless over damn fingers." Miguel smirked at you and you did nothing but moan in response.

You gripped onto Miguel's wrist, whimpering as you shot your head back. "F-Fuck..! I- B-Baby!~" You cried, your thighs starting to tremble. "Let it out.. let it all out, baby.. come on my fingers for me, you beautiful girl.. do it for me, cmon. Let it out..~" Miguel cooed as he leaned in and gently peck a kiss on your lips. "Is that the spot? Mhm.. That feel good, doesn't it? Yeah.. Yeah, just like that baby.. Let it all out, sweetheart." Your body twitched under the pressure, feeling a knot build up within your stomach.

You started to claw at his arm, as your body shook out soft whimpers and gasps. "I-.. Please.. P-Please!~" You cried out, gripping onto his arm tightly as your toes started to curl. Next thing you know, you were a crying mess when you finally came, gripping onto the sheets and shaking as you threw your head back. "Fuckk.." You whined, looking down and watching as he slipped his fingers out, gently licking at them. You panted softly as your cunt clenched around nothing, you looked up at Miguel with a frown.

"Aww, what's wrong now? You mad I made you feel good?" Miguel giggled as he leaned in, pecking a kiss on your lips. "C'mon.. don't be like that with me. Yknow you love me, yknow nobody else can make you feel the way I do, ain't that right baby?"

"M-Mhm.." You nodded your head, looking up at him you felt Miguel bring his hand up and gently hold your chin. He pressed his thumb against your lip and you opened your mouth, he pushed his thumb inside and watched as you started to suck it.

Miguel felt himself throb down there as he watched you suck his thumb and stare at him with those pretty eyes, you were driving him damn crazy. "Fuckk.." Once he pulled his hand away, you watched as he positioned himself between your legs, he used his hand to hold onto his lip, positioning his shaft up against your folds. "Take a deep breath, baby." He whispered.

You bit down on your lip as you watched Miguel, looking down at his thick length and then up at him, you tilted your head at him. You admired how beautiful your boyfriend was, that wonderful bronze skin he had and those strong muscles. God you was lucky, you didn't take a deep breath like he said because before you knew it he shoved it inside, causing you to let out a audible gasp.

"My bad, my bad." Miguel giggled, pushing himself out and pushing himself back inside at a slow pace, he placed his hands on your hips as he gentle held onto it. He bit down on his lip as you clamp down onto his length, "God, you feel amazing.." He chuckled, thrusting in and out at a slow pace, the sounds of your wet cunt filled the room. "Damn, you're wet down here." He whispered as he brought a hand over to your cunt, pressing a thumb up against your clit as he gently rubbed circles up against it.

You laid back on the bed, gripping onto the pillow you laid your head on as you looked up at him, moaning softly. "Mm.. It feels so big.." You whined, squirming around under Miguel a bit, the feeling his thumb against your clit and your eyes rolled back, as he teased the sensitive bud. "Fuckkk... It feels so good." You pleaded.

"Look at me. C'mon baby, focus on me." Miguel leaned in, pressing his forehead up against yours as he stared into your eyes just as you stared into his.

"Good girl.. keep looking at me, just like that. Don't take your eyes off of me." Miguel chuckled as his thrusts quickened, causing a whimper to escape from your lips. "Ohhh.. my goddd!" You moaned, as you leaned your head back. Miguel quickly slapped up gently and cupped your cheeks, forcing you to look at him.

You gave him nothing more than a dazed look, your bother was infected with pleasure you were no longer your normal self.. you were different nothing but a lustful mess trying to reach her orgasm.

"What did I just say?" Miguel growled at you, squeezing your cheeks with his hand. "I said look at me, you dont look away until I say so, do you understand?" He said in a demanding tone.

"M-Mhm.." You whined in response, him thrusting quick strokes into you was not helping any of this.

"Use your words, baby. Speak to me." Miguel whispered, pulling himself out and leaving only the tip in before quickly thrusting deep inside of you.

"Y-YES!" You whined, digging your nails into his arm, "Yes sir..~ I understand, I d-do.." You whimpered as your insides clenched around his length, you felt as though you were going crazy.

Feeling quite close to your limit, but you knew Miguel wouldn't stop.. he wouldn't stop until be had you shaking. Miguel chuckled as he pulled out, gently stroking himself. "Get on your stomach. Now." He demanded, and you did just as he wanted.

You turned to lay on your stomach, arching your back and lifting your ass into the air. You held onto your pillow as you let out a small sigh, it was gonna be a long night.

Miguel watch as you moved into position, he was obsessed with your body. He dragged his thumbs across your strech marks he always thought of them as a map on a woman's body, he leaned down and pecked a kiss up against your ass. "I'm obsessed with you, god. Everything about you is just absolutely amazing." Miguel used his hand to press his tip up against your hole, gently pushing himself inside getting nothing but a whine in return. "Better not hide your voice in that damn pillow." Miguel huffed, placing his hands on your hips, gently pressing his thumbs down on the dimples in your back as he thrusted forwards, forcing himself to the depths of you. He started to thrust at a slick pace, it wasn't too slow or too fast, just right and hitting all of your good spots.

"Oh f-fuck.." You cried, digging your nails into the pillow as you whined. "R-Right there.. Don't stop, please.." You pleaded to him as you brought on of your hands down, starting to rub your sensitive bud for more pleasure. You felt yourself get closer to climax, your body was starting to head up. Your thighs started to twitch, your back started to arch, you then pushed your hips back up against Miguel letting him know you wanted more.

You looked back at him with nothing but a look of lust on your face. Miguel looked down at you as you looked at him, he then waved at you which made you scoff. "I fucking hate you." You moaned as you looked away, of course he was gonna try to play around as if he wasn't tearing up your insides.

"No you don't. You love me. You getting fucked, don't you?" Miguel spanked your ass leaving a stinging sensation behind before he leaned down, pecking a kiss up against your back before speeding up his pace, making you grip onto the sheets. He was like an animal, fucking into you as if he was trying to wear a hole in you. Miguel then leaned down, wrapping a arm around your neck, putting you in a headlock as he pounded into you. He was so quick with his thrusts, yet he managed to hit the same spot every time, he knew that's where the magic, that's the spot that drives you crazy.

"Oh yeah.. Right there! M-Miguel.. Please, oh my-!" You suddenly let out a loud moan, as your body twitched underneath him, your eyes rolled back as Miguel brought his other hand down and started to rub circles up against your clit. He was starting to drive you crazy, "Oh my god I'm coming again.." You closed your eyes as your brows furrowed, feeling a knot start to be formed in your stomach as you grew closer to your climax.

Miguel slowed down a bit, doing a couple if deep strokes in you before you felt someone warm enter your hole, you let out a whine as you looked up at him. Miguel leaned in and pecked a kiss against your forehead, "You look so beautiful under me.." Miguel brought his hand up ans gently cupped your cheeks, squeezing your face. "You should see how pathetic you look right now."

You narrowed your eyes at Miguel, you ated whenever he humiliated you. You just stared into his eyes until he got off of you, you rested your head on the pillow as you attempted to catch your breath.

Miguel got up and left the room, coming back with a warm cloth and a glass of water. "Are you mad at me, baby?" Miguel teased you as he sat the glass down on the nightstand before wiping you down with the cloth. He leaned down and pecked a kiss up against your back.

You just huffed in response as you sat up, looking at him. You reached over and grabbed a glass, bringing the rim up to your lips and drinking the cold water. It was really refreshing after going to pound town. "Miguel." You looked over at him.

"Yes, my love?" Miguel looked at you with a smile, tilting his head at you before sitting down on the bed.

"I love you." You smiled at him, sitting the glass down on the nightstand, turning your body in his direction. "I don't express it enough to you sometimes."

"You don't have to." Miguel placed a hand on the side of your face, gently dragging his thumb across your skin, your dark skin contrasted perfectly with his tanned skin. "I already know you love me. If you didn't love me, then you wouldn't be all over me."

"How would you know if I didn't love you?" You tilted your head at him, raising your eyebrows at him.

"If you didn't love me, you wouldn't be here with me." Miguel leaned in, smiling before he pecked a kiss on your lips.

[orange-catsidy]

i said that i havent been on tumblr much bc my real life has been going well which is true but also because wellness looks different than how i imagined it would

i've mostly just been busy. so busy ive had way less time for keeping up with socials and for my really in-depth hyperfixation-y hobbies like making gifs and archiving media of my favs and even drawing. busy cleaning and making the house nice and learning to cook and going to events. busy trying to take care of my body with skin care and exercising again and eating better. busy with annoying stuff like making appointments and repairing broken things i've had lying around forever and busy with boring stuff like 'trying to understand my finances' and 'filing taxes'. it's a good kind of busy.

//positive post with mention of past suicidal ideation

a lot of these mundane tasks that have been making me so busy lately have been things i've been avoiding or putting off for years, not just out of anxiety, but bc subconsciously i never thought i would live long enough for them to matter. even when things in my life were objectively Fine and i felt Fine, i never wanted to think about if i was happy at my job or retirement plans or getting nagging little health problems checked out or even like, putting on sunscreen to protect my skin bc i was still existing with the vague notion that i would surely die in the near future, so why bother?

it's annoying and boring to suddenly have all these CHORES pile up on me but i know it's a good sign. because the dial in my mind has adjusted from a future where i am definitely dead, young, by whatever means, to a future where i will grow old

and even though i'm busy, the days seem to pass slower bc i'm generally more present in my life and not just getting through it. hopefully once this first bunch of overdue chores is done i'll reach more of a balance and start up my time intensive hobbies again. a human lifespan is long and i have the rest of it to do everything i've been missing

[thenightfolknetwork]

Hello, Nightfolk Network. Me am gorilla.

Gorilla used to be in zoo. Then, one night, big white ball appear over gorilla nest. Ball make very big noise and very big light, get louder and brighter until gorilla fall asleep. When wake up, ball gone and gorilla am smart like person.

Gorilla want to live outside like person do, so run away from zoo. Have hard first month or so, but eventually gorilla find good job at dock and make enough to rent room from little old lady.

Dock job mostly good, is a lot of lift. Gorilla good at lift, and when gorilla go out for drink with work buddies, they say “attaboy, gorilla” and pat on back and gorilla feel like part of gang. Problem is, sometimes gorilla afraid world think gorilla ONLY good at lift, Nightfolk Network know what gorilla mean? Gorilla more than that. Good listener, enjoy trip to theatre… but worry people only see big gorilla arms and not big gorilla heart.

This make gorilla not sure where to go in life. Stay in dock job with money and people but keep just being big lift gorilla? Find other job? Maybe go to school, get degree?

Gorilla even consider going back to zoo, where gorilla know me have square meal every day and plenty of free time and no rent, but not know if it worth life beholden to schedule and whims of The Man. What Nightfolk Network advice?

Thank you,

Gorilla

My dear reader, it sounds as if you're at a very exciting crossroads in your life. You've made excellent progress in carving out a life for yourself after leaving the zoo, and I hope you can take a moment to be proud of how far you've come. You've found a home, a job, and have started building up a community around you. Attaboy, gorilla!

That said, I absolutely understand your frustration at the two-dimensional image your friends seem to have of you. You deserve to be loved and appreciated for all facets of your being, not only those which are most useful to other people.

I can't recommend going back to the zoo, I'm afraid. Unfortunately the benefits it offers come at far too great a cost – namely, to your autonomy and dignity. Better to make your own choices and risk the consequences than to have no choices at all.

Pursuing your education sounds like an excellent step in the right direction. Not only will it improve your chances in the job market, it will also hopefully expose you to all sorts of new ideas and perspectives on the world that you might not have had access to during your time at the zoo.

It will also put you in the way of other learners, and perhaps offer a different sort of friendship than your workmates provide. We all need all sorts of different relationships to feel supported, and the wider range of people you can socialise with, the better.

I don't think you necessarily need to jump straight in with a degree-level course, however. In fact, that might prove rather difficult. I have no doubt you are capable and intelligent enough to pursue a degree if you put your mind to it, but it will be very difficult to get a place on a course without any prior qualifications.

What's more, I'm very aware that you are only at the very earliest stage of your independence. University is a good fit for certain kinds of learners with certain kinds of interests, but it isn't the only option available to you.

You need to take a little time working out what it is you really want to do, and come up with a plan of action that suits your own needs.

I recommend reaching out to your local council to see what opportunities are available for adult learners. Many offer free courses where you can earn the equivalent of your GCSEs or A Levels, usually with flexible course times that can fit around a working person's schedule.

Just as your work friends need to learn to see you as a more rounded person, you also need to treat yourself with the same courtesy. You have so much within you that deserves to be nurtured and nourished, and are only at the start of the journey to discover what all those different needs might be.

In short, reader, I recommend throwing yourself into new experiences, pursuing whatever avenues take your interest, and opening that big gorilla heart to the world.

[For more creaturely advice, check out Monstrous Agonies on your podcast platform of choice, or visit monstrousproductions.org for more info]

[fandomfluffandfuck]

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASEEEE WRITE SOMETHING WITH TOUCH STARVED WINTER SOLDIER AND MALE HANDLER READER (or stevie, whatever floats ur boat) I AM DESPERATEEEE

I've kind of written something with touch starved, early-deprogramming Bucky and Steve--"Don't Forget To Remember Me"--so, I'll go ahead with the x-reader part of this prompt here!

Mentions of HYDRA cruelty below the cut, nothing exactly "on screen." This is mostly angsty fluff, actually.

You aren't sure when it began because no matter how deeply you scrub your mind for clues, shifting through the heavy rubble of your time with "S.H.I.E.LD" going from a regular recruit to being drug into the ugly underbelly with the grimy cockroaches of HYDRA, there isn't a clear path. Perhaps it started when you were assigned the joke grunt work of waxing the asset's chest (x). Or, maybe, it really started after you had been shown to do a satisfactory enough job at stripping the asset to naked flesh, so then you were assigned to deal with the knots that had developed at the back of the asset's neck. Told to rip a wide tooth comb through its mane as the thought occurred to you that, huh, it felt a lot like when you used to have to do this for your younger sisters after a summer of wild, young shenanigans. Hollering at the top of your lungs late into the hot evenings. Swimming for hours in pools and lakes and any bodies of water you could get yourselves to, almost always with wrinkled fingertips, baths or oceans or anything just to feel the cool lapping water. Playing chase, flying out the doors of the house when your parents had finally had enough of bulls in their china shop. Running through fields into forests, racing to climbing trees and hopefully not tumble out of them and end up in a cast (again). Summers with the weather too nice and the sun staying suspended in the sky for hours, so you were too busy for silly things like brushing hair. You were only saved by the fact that your mother insisted on buzzing your hair to the scalp for summers, no need to brush that. Your sisters didn't have the luxury.

It's kind of like those times with your sisters--raking a comb through the soldier's unkept hair.

Once, with late, mature summer bleeding into gestating fall, the colors fading and muddling, you found your sisters hair had become too tangled to undo, so you complained, and your parents had made her get her hair cut. She balled her eyes out after they proclaimed it, stuttering and pleading, her thin chest heaving, just try mooore! The knots got in! They can get out! But no. They couldn't come undone. She would have to deal with it and learn to take care of her hair better or she could have her hair buzzed seasonally like you. (She was not thrilled, even if that was at a time when she looked up to you, her big brother, her hero)

Working harshly through the asset's mane is sort of like that. But not.

Really not.

You are never gentle with the soldier like you were with your baby sisters.

Left with the asset, you were instructed to tear the knots out, be as unkind (or cruel, if you like) as needed. Just get them out of the way. Tear them out. Lather them up and comb through. Buzz them off with clippers. And if the asset acts up, use a knife--it doesn't have to be just on its hair, you can't hurt it that bad, so don't think twice.

So...

Yeah, maybe it started then. Somewhere negligible and nebulous between the waxing of its chest and combing-slash-cutting of its locks.

If it started then, that would make sense, because now, whenever the soldier and you are alone for whatever reason (or nonreason), it crawls into your lap like some kind of desperate, feral raccoon. A creature that's dirty and trembling and, somehow, hungry enough to be entirely reckless, directly approaching the human who owns the trash cans it's rummaging through, trying to find anything to stuff into its mouth of rotten, putrid teeth.

And what are you to do in these times, alone with a lapful of weapon?

Typically, when it happens, the soldier seems too fragile to push away. If it is animated--thawed and moving of it's own volition--the asset is often fresh from a mission where you know it's been run ragged, barely fed, hardly given time to rest. As is protocol. So, it is fragile.

This time in particular, though, it's been so recently wiped you can still smell the sharp bleach and dull undercurrent of electricity wafting off of it, supposedly clean yet faintly fried. Acidic. Almost the smell of lazer hair removal but on steriods. Your lip curls up involuntarily at the stench. You always have a moment of hesitation when it does this. And this time is no exception.

You remind yourself that this will make your future grunt work easier. Right? That's why you accept this strange ritual. Isn't it? It's okay for you to lay your hands on the asset if it's part of your job. You will not be punished for it, nor will the asset. Right? This is just like waxing it's chest, combing it's hair, or adjusting its tac gear. Isn't it?

With it's surprisingly light weight in your lap, you do not viciously grab, digging your nails into it's flesh and scars and metal; nor do you slap or hit or pull, rather you set your hands on it's grimy, sweaty back. More evidence of it's recent wiping alongside it's still trembling muscles. Thick sweat overeating involuntary twitches so sharp it looks painful and unnatural, more like a robot jolting than an organic thing moving. Contortions. Convulsions.

With your hands on it's upper back and shoulder, the soldier makes a sound like metal creaking, bent too far, about to snap, warning the manipulator of the impending give. Shards will fly.

You do not feel threatened.

The asset is bent, nearly broken after it's mission and the maintenance after. It cannot hurt you. You could hurt it easily with its fragility and brittleness. Except, you don't intend to hurt it now or any other time when you are alone together. Instead, you allow the minutes to tick by before heavy footfalls announce the entrance of another cockroach, crawling out to shove the asset back into the freezer before scurrying away.

In your spare change minutes, you bizarrely reward the asset and it's starved raccoon behavior, rubbing the cold coins together, if the noises the soldier makes are anything to go by. Metal on metal. Rubbing. Rusty, almost whines as your hands sweep slowly down it's back, following the line of it's bent out of shape spine all the way down to the top of his tac pants that they've left on it this time.

Under your hands, it is only quivering lines of flesh, muscle, and bone shot through with harder callouses of thick scars and metal. If you go based off feeling alone, you would assume that the asset has already been broken--bent past the natural give sheet metal has to it--with all the shrapnel left in it's body. It has bent, snapped, and shattered. The feeling of the asset, by virtue of how rough and sharply-edged it is, makes your movements turn slower and even more gentle, you couldn't make your hands turn cruel if you tried.

You're nearly massaging the creature now, and you can't help but notice how cold it is as you touch it, rubbing its back, shoulders, and the nape of its neck. Every time this ritual unfurls, you notice. It is strange. Shouldn't a soldier with impeccable healing and speed and strength unfurling run much hotter? It puzzles you, but so do many of the things about the asset and the cockroaches that puppet it, crawling inside it, filling its frame with an infestation. Why does it do anything? You have no room to wonder, though, because why do you do anything they say, anyway? How did you get here? What would your baby sister's think of this? What would the wild, summer-sweetened boy you used to be think of this?

The asset creaks again, bringing you back to this ritual. It's pushing it's spasming back into your hands. You sigh, finding, feeling, a knot deep in the muscle below its metal shoulder. You are unwilling to tenderize the muscle, untangling the knot, because it would hurt. You've had deep tissue massages. They do not feel good. The mission and maintenance of the soldier are fresh in your mind and inhaled through your nostrils, so you can not bring yourself to add to its pain.

The best you can do, not adding pain, is some skin-deep soothing. Nothing more. You cannot change much. In parallel, you and the asset are stuck. What you can do is keep the asset's hair tangle-free, you can opt to shave the asset instead of wax it, and you can give into it's hunger. Sometimes. When it's safe to do so. If the cockroaches have the power to blend the soldier's brain into a slurry of nothing but obedience, they can do the same to you. If the cockroaches can twist and alter the precise balance of homeostasis to a sickly chill with injections that burn so badly inside the asset that it has to be held down, risking broken bones and torn muscles, than they can do anything. Everything.

So, shockingly, it is with a weapon lying across your lap--used against humanity as a precise knife between the ribs, slotting into the heart of men who represent hope and uprising and future--that you relocate your own organic nature. Your compassion. Your morals. Your humanness.

And if you leave the lock to the cage containing the asset for the last few hours before he goes back on ice open... that is been you and the asset you have cradled and held and come to know as organic and human despite the metal forced to be a part of him.

You can only hope the asset seizes the opportunity. A way out. The chance to reclaim the humanity it--he has been stripped of.