#I can project so many things onto this wee guy from when I was an odd kid and most of it wouldn’t even be far off. ain’t that strange

[curi0uscreature]

* Raz had a True Psychic Tales self insert at some point do not sit in my house and tell me no

[blorbocedes]

Usually as I find more and more unflattering lore about my blorbos it cures my obsession but for some reason w/ Nico it just makes me even more intrigued. It's not even always apologia lol sometimes I just think "thats horrible" with no "but it's ok". Also by the way I've noticed you're very keen on Max (and I'm not) so I'm eager to see if you can convince me of that too (as you did with brocedes)

this is a really interesting ask! one thing about me is I'm for haters rights. I'm a hater myself, and sports needs antagonist to your protags -- it's simply more fun, and I'm here to have fun. I've got people here who hate macks, lewis, lando; and that's fine by me. you like who you like. if you hate Nico it'll probably be a bit awkward but yeah lol... I'm going to essay because you've caught me in a Mood so buckle in

I'm not necessarily in the business on converting people either... I think people are just attracted to other passionate people... the love for a blorbo is infectious. i follow so many DR girlies that he's like a son-in-law to me. so this won't be me converting me but in true max fashion I will be maxplaining my thoughts that no one asked for while you're stuck captive 😈

onto unpleasant lore. there is simply no one with a perfect, unblemished history. Nico's greenwashing, privileged, tone deaf, not even gonna Touch the 💉, a little bit manipulative girlboss slay. even the very best of the grid are ultimately filthy rich, sportswashing, and hypocritical -- esp if they're climate activists. none of our blorbos are immune

i think it also helps with Nico that he's retired, beyond talking shit he doesn't actually pose a threat to your blorbo on the grid. Max is the world champion so he's everyone on the grid's pain in the ass rn. I think there's a lot of fair reasons to hate max, and then there's a lot of unfair reasons that's more popular narrative. how I got into Nico was I saw a bunch of people on twitter hating him and I was like lol who's This guy 😂🤣 let me learn more about him so I'm an Informed hater🤓 and then... well 🥴

if you don't like macks, that's okay! you don't even need a "valid" reason. i wanna punch Lance Stroll in the face, I don't have a reason for it. we don't choose our blorbos.

why I enjoy max is cause

a) sick racer. seriously, generational talent. there's this idea that he's some super unsafe crash happy driver but that's really not true, and that narrative is from 2016 -- when he was a wee baby 17 year old. Imagine you're defined by how you were at 17 🫥 I would die. we are watching history in the making: and we'll be seeing him on the grid for many more years inshallah. sexy ass racing... and no it's not cause he's got the best car. i think just how much fun he had wheel to wheel racing with a broken car against Mick in France showed that. this dude just loves racing the way you and I will never love anything

b) he's just Some Guy.

there's a lot of narratives about how evil he is.... but my understanding of him is a dude who doesn't care to play along with the PR optics of a situation. He's blunt, he's honest -- it can be off putting to some, but I find it really refreshing. if you ask him if he's scared of Marc's straight line speed, he'll just say no. yes king give me nothing!! he is the ultimate what you're seeing is what you're getting. he's simply max :)

what I love about him is his innate self belief. he had a dad who projected all his failed ambitions on him, and the post linked by bella does a good job of explaining the parental abuse. I also speak about it here. fandom ofc cannot handle a topic that nuanced, which leads to the worst fucking takes of all time. max is not defined by his abuse, rather time and again he's shown how much so much more, so full of love. he was practically groomed to be a racer, but he's so much more than the weight of the expectations put on him since childhood. there's this interview of baby teen max asking if he thinks he'll be a better racer than his dad and he just says "I am." you need to have that kind of faith in yourself, and prove it!!!!!!!

his whole circle is friends from years back, his mom and his sister, and his gf/her kid. he's literally 24, rich, successful he can have or do anything he wants, and he just likes chilling with his family and playing the sim 🥺 a family dude through and through

beyond that, he's truly just Some Dude. he's got a dry sarcastic sense of humour, has mommy issues, likes to be in the arms of other stronger men, he comes across as a dude with a decent head on his shoulders. yes he bitches in the car and swears a lot and breaks his DRS button pressing it 50 times, and then goes to say he thinks he's pretty calm lolol I love unreliable narrators. it also says a lot that most of the grid likes him, Daniel, Fernando, Lando, Carlos, Charl, he's capable of being a normal dude off the track who isn't untouchable.

C) tits and thighs

before I got into f1, I saw this black and white video of max from Abu Dhabi celebrations, drunk as shit, in some dude's arms singing "we are the champions" I knew NOTHING about him beyond he just became the world champion of ??? something, and he seems so, so happy. and for me that's all it took. that's my golden shoe boy.

I think he's simply lovely :)

[harrywritingsbyme]

Hi would you mind writing a short lil something about Harry and Reader turning bubs‘ room into a big boy room and getting kind of emotional getting rid/storing away all his baby stuff? That last ask was so cute 🥺

Growing Up

Based Off Of This Ask

A/N: So I just wanted to write something. So I wrote some dad!Harry fluff for y’all bc this concept was too cute and I just loved it so much. It’s just a little blurb, that kinda gives me a head cannon type of vibe for some reason...so I hope it doesn’t suck lmao! enjoy🥺🥰

Your little boy was growing up so fast. It was almost as if you had blinked and the time just passed you both by. You and Harry could vividly remember the day you two found out that you were expecting, when bubs was just a tiny bean in your stomach. The both of you were beyond happy in that moment. You were gleefully jumping around the bedroom and you two let the joy filled tears from the amazing news flow from your eyes as you celebrated this monumental moment in you guys’ family and life together. 

Over the course of the nine or so months following that day, you and Harry happily watched as your baby boy (and you for that matter) grew. You and Harry got to see your baby at your scheduled ultrasounds and you watched him transform from a little dot on the screen to a fully formed baby with ten fingers and toes along with a miniature version of Harry’s nose. The two of you felt bubs growing too. When you felt yourself getting bigger, your son was getting bigger as well. Along with the increase in the amount of weight forming in your midsection, you could feel your son moving around too. As you became farther along in your pregnancy, you could feel your baby boy moving around in your stomach more and more. There were so many times where bubs would move around and kick you, to which you’d let out a sharp wince and Harry would softly yet “sternly” reprimand his son letting him know that it wasn’t nice to kick his mommy. But even though you could definitely go without a swift kick to your ribs, you couldn’t stop the little smile from spreading across your face once you got over the initial pain of it all. You were so happy to feel that your baby boy was growing and healthy, and you were beyond excited to see him. 

Along with a couple of very memorable days throughout your pregnancy, and the day you found out that you were expecting, the day you finally gave birth was definitely a day that would always remain clear at the forefront of you and Harry’s minds. After an epidural(that was hardly effective in your opinion), hours upon hours of being in labor, a lot of tears, and some strong screams at Harry, the two of you finally welcomed your baby boy into the world. He was absolutely perfect and everything you and Harry had envisioned. Even though he was much bigger than the tiny dot on the screen at the very early stage of your pregnancy, he was still incredibly tiny. Especially when he was in Harry’s arms. The two of you soaked up every moment with your baby boy and neither of you wanted him to grow up and not be the little baby that fit perfectly in your arms. Even when he kept the two of you up at night and into the wee hours of the morning, you and Harry never wanted him to grow up.

But that’s exactly what he did. Again, it was like the two of you blinked and the time just blew right past you both. One moment he was the tiny little human that found his home in your belly and then in your arms. And the next he was a two and a half year old carbon copy of Harry with a sprinkle of you in the mix that had a big and amazing personality of his own. He was without a doubt you and Harry’s favorite person in the world and there weren’t enough words in the world to describe how much love you two had for that little boy. But even though this was the case, you and Harry couldn’t help but miss that little baby you brought home two and a half years ago.

And since he was no longer a baby anymore, it was time for bubs to get his first big boy room. 

He’d already outgrown so many of the clothes you and Harry had gotten him along with the toys he had. The last thing on the outgrown list was the crib. And once that was finally crossed off the list, it meant that he’d finally outgrown everything. Which meant that it was time to give him a room that best suited him and his growth along with his interests. You and Harry noticed that bubs had taken a great interest in dinosaurs. From the toys he wanted and played with to the books he wanted to read to his favorite pajamas, everything was dinosaurs. So that’s what you and Harry decided to play off of when building your sons new room. The two of you wanted to create a dinosaur oasis for him and you wanted it to be everything that the toddler could possibly want. For almost four months you and Harry bought all of the furniture and decor that fit perfectly into the dinosaur theme the two of you had envisioned. And as it all came in, the two of you were able to perfectly and seamlessly put the room together. Every once in a while having a little hiccup in the process like not centering a nail on the wall or something, but nothing major. 

Now while you and Harry were loving the project and enjoyed doing this for your son, it was still a really hard process for you both. Particularly for Harry though. As the two of you got closer to being done with the new room, you and Harry began packing up bubs’ baby clothes and things that he grew out of so that you could donate them and make space for the new things you two had gotten for him. As you two packed though, Harry was incredibly sad. While he loved his little man who ran around and was just full of life and energy, he missed his little baby. He couldn’t pick him up and have him all snug and tucked into his arms the same way he used to. Bubs was bigger and all of that was sinking in now as Harry packed up all of the small clothes and toys. With everything that was placed into the container, a little coo or memory left Harry’s mouth. He couldn’t stop himself from getting a little emotional at the fact that his baby was now a big boy. The both of you were incredibly sad that he was growing up so fast. 

And even though it was an incredibly sad thing to think about, what made both you and Harry happy about it all was the big smile and shouts of amazement that came from your son once you two revealed the room to him. He was absolutely in love with his new big boy bed and all of the dinosaur pictures and decor on the walls, and the toys, and the dinosaur nightlight you two had gotten for him. He ran around the room looking at everything and taking it all in and just loving what his mommy and daddy put together for him. He couldn’t stop saying the cutest little thank you’s which only melted you and Harry even more. Seeing bubs so happy made you and Harry beyond happy and it made the whole growing up thing a bit easier. 

After showing some of the things he couldn’t immediately see in his new room and playing with him a bit, you and Harry decided to step out and let bubs enjoy his new room for a little bit while you two continued with cleaning out his old room. The two of you gave the little boy a ton of squeezes and kisses before leaving him alone with his toys and getting back to packing all the baby stuff up. You and Harry had a set up on the floor so the two of you got back down there and went back to folding and looking through things. After a little while though, Harry couldn’t do it anymore. He was too overcome with the fact that his baby boy was getting bigger and now had his first big boy room. All of it was just too much for him. Keeping the little clothing item in his hand, Harry turns himself around and lays down on the floor, resting his head in your lap and causing you to turn your attention onto him. 

“What’s going on babe?” You ask, finishing up the fold on the item in your hands before giving him your full attention. 

“M’sad” Harry mumbles with a big pout spread across his face. 

“Why baby?” You coo, bringing one of your hands to the side of his face and the other to his hair. 

“Because! Our baby isn’t a baby anymore.” Harry whines dramatically. 

“It’s not like he’s 30 or something with a wife and kid of his own...you are.” You joke, trying to lighten the mood. 

“Y/n!” He whines. 

“Okay fine! I hate it when you’re all mopey and sad, so don’t be. I’m sad too, but it’ll be okay. No matter how big he gets, he’ll always be our baby.”

“I know, I just can’t stop thinking about how small he was when we brought him home and how he really needed us. Now he’s this little person who isn’t as small and who is starting to not need us. He’s his own little person.” He explains. 

“Well he is his own little person. But he’s only two and a half, so he’ll be needing us for a good while Harry.” You reassure him with a little laugh, trying your best to comfort your very emotional husband. “What will make you feel better? What’s gonna make my baby feel better?” You coo, softly pinching his cheek in the process. 

“Make another baby?” He proposes, turning is head up towards you. 

“You know that takes both of us right?” You ask sarcastically, trying your hardest to not roll your eyes at him. 

“If I’m not mistaken, I remember you being a big fan of the baby making process.” He reminds you smugly. 

“Maybe.”

“See! Plus we’ve talked about it a couple times, so it’s the perfect time.” He says happily in your lap. “If we put bubs down for his nap now, we can have our second bubby cooking in there by dinner.” He says optimistically, bringing a hand up to your currently empty stomach. 

“I don’t think that’s how it works Harry.” You deadpan, trying to hold back your laughs from how happy and cute he was in this moment. 

“Who cares?! It never hurts to try!!” Harry continues on. “Are you in?” He asks hopefully. 

“Let’s make another baby then.” You giggle, giving in to the idea. From the outside looking in, it may have looked like a bit of a spur of the moment thing. But in actuality, you were already thinking of possibly adding another member to the Styles family. You too were sad at the idea of your little boy growing up. And on top of that, you wanted him to have a sibling and someone to play with. So it all kind of worked out. Bubs was going to be turning three soon and you and Harry were really thinking and talking about another baby so it was perfect. You just hoped that you wouldn’t be popping out another baby as each of the other kids were growing up. You were kind of crossing your fingers that going forward a big boy bed didn’t come with the quest of having another baby. 

Maybe after baby number two harry wouldn’t be so sad about growing up. 

Masterlist

[davidmann95]

Sooo… Superman and the Authority?

magnus-king123 asked: Your thoughts on Superman & the authority Give it to me...lol

Anonymous asked: Seeing Bezos take his little trip into space the same day Morrison puts out a Superman comic that touches on how far we’ve fallen from the days when we dreamed of utopian futures where everyone explored the stars was a big gut punch. Not used to Superman being topical in that way.

Anonymous asked: What'd you think of Superman and the Authority#1?

This is far beyond what I can fit in the normal weekly reviews, so taking this as my notes on the first six pages, with this and this as my major lead-in thoughts:

* Janin's such a perfect fit for Morrison - the scale, the power, the facial expressions selling the character work, the screwing around with the panel formatting as necessary to sell the effect, the numinous sense of things going on larger than you can fully perceive amidst the beauty and chaos. It's a shame he wasn't around 25 years ago to draw JLA, but I'll take him going with Morrison onto other future projects.

* His intro action sequence is such a great demonstration of why Black actually does have something to offer, and also how he's such a dumbass desperately needing Superman to save him from himself.

* While Jordie Bellaire didn't legit go with an entirely monochromatic palate the way early previews suggested, it's still an effect frequently and excellently deployed here. And glad to see Steve Wands carry into this from Blackstars since there's such an obvious carryover from its work with Superman.

* "Gentlemen. Ladies. Others." Great both because of the obvious - hey, Superman's nodding at me! - and because it's a phrasing that reinforces that this take on him (and let's be real Morrison) is old as hell.

* I'm mostly past caring about whether this is an alt-Earth Superman until it becomes indisputable one way or another, this and Action both rule so what does it really matter? But while there are still a couple signs in play suggesting some kind of division (the Action Comics #1036 cover, Midnighter up to time-travel shenanigans) the "lost in time" quote clearly thrown in after the fact to explain how he could have met Kennedy outside of 5G that wouldn't be necessary for an Elseworlds, the assorted gestures towards Superman's current status quo, the Kingdom Come symbol appearing in Action, and that Morrison would have had to completely rewrite the ending if this wasn't supposed to be 'the' version of Clark Kent going forward as was the intent when they first planned it all say to me that no, no fooling around, this is our guy going forward one way or another.

* Janin and Bellaire making the first version of the crystal Fortress ever that actually looks as cool as you want it to.

Anonymous asked: I like that Superman and The Authority is basically the anti-All-Star; instead of the laid back, immortal Superman who is supercharged, we have a stressed, ageing Superman whose tremendous powers are fading. The former will always be there to save us, but the latter is running out of time and needs to pull off a Hail Mary. Also, he mentions in his monologue to Black that he was "lost in time" when he met JFK, so maybe he is the main continuity Clark. Or he's the t-shirt Supes from Sideways.

* You're absolutely right - the power reversal is obvious and the ticking clock in play seemingly isn't for his own survival but everyone around him as he wakes up and realizes all the old icons grew complacent with the gains they'd made and he's not leaving behind the world he meant to. Both, however, are built on the idea of preparing the world to not need them anymore - it'll still have a Superman in his son, but that'll only work because of the others he empowers and inspires. The question is what happens to Clark if he's not going to live in the sun for 83000 years.

* Clark's 'exercise' here does more to sell me on the idea of Old Man Superman as a cool idea than however many decades of Earth 2 stuff.

* Intergang being noted alongside Darkseid and Doomsday speaks to how much Kirby informed Morrison's conception of Superman.

* This isn't exactly the most progressive in its disability politics but at least it makes clear Black's being a piece of shit about it.

* It's startling how much Clark can get away with saying stuff in here you'd never expect to come out of Superman's mouth. "I made an executive decision" "Privacy, really...?" "You have nowhere to go, Black. Nothing to live for." "There are few people in my life who I instinctively and viscerally dislike, and you've always been one of them." It only works because there's zero aggression behind it, he's just past the point of niceties and being totally frank while making clear none of these assessments preclude that he cares and is going to unconditionally do the right thing every time. He is absolutely, per Morrison, humanity's dad picking us up when we're too drunk to drive ourselves home.

* The story doesn't put a big flashing light over it, but it's not even a little bit subtle having the material threat of the issue be a ticking timebomb left by the carelessness and hubris of generations past.

* Manchester keeps trying to poke the bear and prove his hot takes about Superman and it's just not working. The front he put up under Kelley is gone after decades of defeats, and as Morrison understands what actually conceptually works about him as a rival to Superman underneath the aging nerd paranoia he's exposed as what he absolutely would be in 2021: a dude with a horrific terminal case of Twitter brainworms. I was PANICKED when I heard there was an 'offensive term' joke in this, I was braced for Morrison at their well-meaning worst, but it's such a goddamn perfect encapsulation of a very specific breed of Twitter leftist who uses their politics first and foremost as a cudgel and justification to label their abrasive, judgmental shittiness as self-righteousness (plus it's a killer payoff to a joke from way back in his original appearance). Cannot believe they pulled that off when they're so very, very open about basically not knowing how the internet works.

* @charlottefinn: Manchester Black using his telekinetic powers to force someone he hates to fave a problematic tweet so that he can screenshot it and start a dogpile

@intergalactic-zoo: “Once they cancel Bibbo, Superman won’t be *anyone’s* fav’rit anymore!”

* Friend noted this issue had to be fully the conversation because the whole premise stands on the house of cards of these two somehow working together, and with three 'silent' inset panels the creative team pulls off that turning point.

* So much of this feels on the surface like Morrison bringing back the All-Star vibes with Clark, but when he drops a "That's all you got?" in a brawl you realize what's underlining that bluntness and confidence in the face of failure is that deep down this is still the Action guy too. This dude ain't gonna get wrecked in his Fortress while the other guy chuckles about him being A SOFT WEE SCIENTIST'S SON!

* Bringing up Jor-El made me realize that Morrison already spelled out that this is the final threat to Superman, what he faces at the end of the road:

"Now it's your turn, Superman."

* A l'il Superman 2000/All-Star reference with the Phantom Zone map!

* There's so much intertextuality going on here even by Morrison standards - Change or Die with the old hero putting together a team of morally nebulous folks out to 'fix' everything, Flex Mentallo with the muscleman trying to redeem the punk, Doomsday Clock with the fate of the world hinging on whether Superman can get through to a meta stand-in for an idea of 'modern' comics cynicism, DKR and New Frontier and Kingdom Come and Multiversity and Seven Soldiers and What's So Funny and All-Star and Action and the last 5 years of monthly Superman comics and Authority and probably Jupiter's Legacy and Tom Strong - but none of that's needed. You could go in with the baseline pop cultural understanding of the character and not care about any of the inside baseball shit and get that this is a story about a leader of a generation that let down the people they made all their grand promises to as inertia and day-to-day demands and complacency let him be satisfied with the accomplishments they'd made long ago, looking at a new era and seeing the ways its own activists are dropping the ball. The only thing that fundamentally matters in a "you have to accept you're reading a superhero story" sense is that because he's Superman he's willing to own up to it and listen to people who might know better about some things and try to set things right while he and those who'll take his place still have a chance. And yes, the oldster looking back on their legacy with a skeptical eye and hoping for better from the next generation, hoping most of all that their little heir apparent can fulfill the promise inside of him instead of being a provocating little shitkicker, is obviously also autobiographical.

* The overlaying Kennedy reprisal is such a great visual of a sudden intrusive thought.

* The Kryptonite secret is the obvious "This is going to matter!" moment, but "He lied about his son" is a bit that doesn't connect to anything going on right now so maybe that's important here too? More significantly, the Justice League can't actually be the villains here but that Ultra-Humanite's crew are in an Earth-orbiting satellite makes pretty clear what's up.

* I've said before that between Superman, OMAC, and a New Gods-affiliated speedster this was going to use all of Morrison's favorite things. King Arthur playing a role isn't exactly dissuading me.

* Love the idea that all the antiheroes have their own community in the same way as the capes and tights crew. They definitely all privately think the rest are posers though and that they alone are Garth Ennis Punisher in a mob of Garth Ennis Wolverines.

* Manchester's fallen so far he's gone from trying to convince Superman to kill to convince him to dunk on people for their bad takes and Clark just doesn't get it. Official prediction of dialogue for upcoming issues:

"According to these bloody Fortress scans, the only thing that can restore your powers is an unfiltered hit of dopamine. Don't worry, Doctor Black has a few ideas."

"Hmm. Maybe I'll plant a nice tree?"

"...fuck you."

* Ok I already talked about how great the Fortress looks in here but LOVE this library.

* A pair of pages this seems like the right spot to discuss from Black's original appearance that underlines both his and Superman's inadequacies up to this point:

Responding to the problem of "the government and penal system are hopelessly corrupt" neither of them has any actual notion of what to do about it in spite of their respective posturing beyond how to handle individual outside actors - each is in their own way every bit as small-minded and reactionary as the other. Clark's coming around though, and he's holding out hope for the other guy.

* Superman: Have a lovely mineral water :) proper hydration is important :)

Manchester Black: *Is a dude who can get so mad he vomits and passes out. At water.*

* That last page is the one to beat for the year, and does more to put over the idea of this as an Authority book than that Midnighter and Apollo are literally going to show up. It also feels like Morrison tacitly acknowledging all the ways the premise could go or at least be received wrong - from Superman saying 'enough is enough' to who he's bringing into the fold to go about it - in the most beautifully on-the-nose fashion imaginable. Maybe they'll save us all! Or maybe they'll drown us in their vomit.

[ahkaraii]

Belatedly answered ask responses

Thank you for anyone who has sent me stuff!! I LOVE reading them and I’m so sorry I’m awful at replying, but know that I love each and every one. Here’s my attempt to answer a whole lot :D

@doki-dream​ Thank you so much for enjoying my DBZ comics!! DBZ was my earliest “fandom”, as it were, from over twenty years ago, and it was so, so special to me as a wee child. I think it’s obvious how heavily I project onto Gohan, haha! But now that I’m an adult, it’s really fun to weave in all these ideas I had as a kiddo into a more seamless interpretation that works with the existing canon. I hope you continue to enjoy my interpretations  <3

@half-devil-in-red-leather​ Thank you so much for sticking around with me for so long!!  :D :D DMC still has a very dear place in my heart, and always will. As for Trunks and Gohan  -- they were my favourite characters, too!! Gohan moreso than Trunks in my case, but I��m awfully fond of all iterations of my purple-haired boy, and someday I’ll get around to drawing all of my Mirai!Trunks headcanons :) Trunks and Goten are fascinating to me as well, because they’re a Unit, yanno? In canon they were rarely seen without the other, and so their development as people is undoubtedly tied together, too. The differences between Mirai!Trunks and main-timeline!Trunks is FASCINATING, and speaks a lot to what are “core” characteristics of Trunks and what are things he’s adapted from his close peers over the years. Anyway, I love Trunks and Goten and Gotenks and rest assured I’ll be posting a lot more about them in the future.

@vejigante​ Unfortunately I still haven’t watched Dragon Ball Super beyond the two movies (Battle of Gods and Broly) so I’m preeetty much out of the loop as to who these guys are. Maybe someday :0

@katerchip​ :D :D :D =happy=

@yusuke96universe​ I don’t exactly take suggestions, mostly because I kinda draw whatever I feel like in any given moment, and drawing something based on someone else’s idea or suggestion is almost always stressful (”what if they don’t like my take” “what if I drew something they find gross” “what if what if what if” etc), but I can safely say I, uhhh, actually don’t know much about Tien??? I’ve skim read the original Dragon Ball manga, but I never watched the original Dragon Ball anime, so Tien is one of those side characters I don’t have a very good grasp on, or, frankly, much interest in. Maybe someday!

@shika-boom​ Fugaku and Shikaku were not friends, per say, but they were always peripherally aware of each other. They’re both clan heirs, for one, so you gotta know who’s who. Shikaku has always been a nosy nin who collects secrets, while Fugaku’s shameful secrets have always been painfully on display, so it’s not like they didn’t butt heads now and again growing up. I talk a little more about the topic here (x).

@darkblades75​ Thank you!! You can read the manga online here (x).

@hydrabellwolf​ Raditz is an interesting character I’m still getting a handle of, in my own interpretation, but I think he essentially has little to no attachment to his birth family and as a kid he probably thought Goku was pampered trash because Gine kept his pod at home. I don’t think Raditz ever made the connection that Gine sent Goku out to save him from the massacre, so I don’t think Raditz realized Gine “spared” Goku and didn’t think about him (Raditz).

Afterward, he only ever remembers Goku might still exist when he realizes he needs someone he can ally with against Nappa and Vegeta (after establishing he’s Alpha Dog, hence him stealing Gohan and talk-posturing at Goku instead of properly fighting from the start), so it’s not so much familial piety as it is convenience because he’s outnumbered and outgunned and outbullied by the only couple other Saiyan survivors.

@wardstoneus That’s a story for another day, and details I probably won’t get super into because I’ve learned my lesson about delving into unnecessarily dark themes in an ambiguously exploitative way. But, yeah, I have lots of Thoughts about Raditz’s distinctive hairline and how that looks more like Vegeta than it does Bardock, and how exactly that could’ve gone about.

It was not a consensual thing :/ Gine had a rough life, and not just because she was weak and also not very Saiyan like. Bardock married her to protect her after she was pregnant, and he got demoted to low class because of it. (That’s how I explain to myself how Bardock was apparently super fucking strong and yet inexplicably deemed low class).

@loyaltykask​ Tbh the only other Sakumo ship I find mildly interesting is Sakumo/Tsunade (you can kinda tell why I drew them together in the Five comic in the first place xDD), but, naturally, my take on Sakumo and the Sakumo that gets shipped with Orochimaru in fandom are very different characters with very different pasts that made them that way :’D So if I separate my take and just take fanon Sakumo as it is, there’s lots of interesting fics with him and Orochimaru and such. I don’t tend to read them though, because Orochomaru is never in character (as I interpret him, anyway), and that can be tiring XD

@pretty-rage-machine​ Thank you!!! I’m sorry (not sorry) that I jump around fandoms so much, my creative brain is stupid and it latches onto new things every 2-6 months without control and I’ve learned to just go with the flow, it allows me to create faster and better works if I let myself explore whatever topic has captured my interest at any given moment instead of forcing it to stick to one thing. Luckily, I am not a professional artist; if you are, don’t do this xDDD Maintaining discipline and motivation beyond personal whim is important in any job!!

That being said, yay!! I’m glad you like my stuff regardless of how much knowledge you have of the canon I’m messing with. Hearing my characterizations are grounded and relatable makes me happy <3<3

@poly-hebdo​ Thank you!!! :D :D Once again, I apologize for jumping fandoms like the attention deficit fella I am, but I’m glad you’re still digging my works regardless of the fandom!

@jkl-fff​ Ahh thank you, friend!! (Side note reply: I watched DBZ:A yeeears ago, and I have to rewatch it again STAT because I actually have gotten mentioned by MasakoX (voice of gohan and goku in DBZA) a couple of times now, once in one of his videos and twice on his twitter feed, so I’m like HOLY SHIIIIT!!!! because that’s some Senpai-Noticed-Me shit and eeeeeeek).

It may be obvious by now but I HEAVILY project onto Gohan, he was basically my mental self-insert as a wee lad, so my characterization of him is heavily tinged by that selfish nostalgia; part of the reason I’ve been drawing these comics is to seamlessly integrate that mental image of Gohan I have living in my brain to the actual existing canon, to make him a plausible version of Gohan that can exist between the pages. From that, a fascinating little narrative has been born and I’ve been having fun detailing out the characters that exist around the Gohan I’ve created :D Thank you for enjoying my hot take on it!!

And YES LAWD I am all for bisexual Gohan, he and Dende were totally a cute first romance thing as teenagers, though naturally it had to come to an end as they moved on with their lives -- Dende to proper ascetic Godhood, and Gohan to a more normal human highschool life. Maybe someday I’ll get into the nuanced complexities of that, though I probably won’t post it to twitter, where the audience there seems to crave more canon straight stuff than any wistful doomed gay sideplots (that seems more a Tumblr thing). Ahhhh so many ideas, so little time XDD

[softstraykidsimagines]

Boyfriend!Hyunjin

A/N: SHE PROTECC

SHE ATTACC

BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY

SHE BACC

HI GUYS!!! I’m so happy to be posting again i cry :,)  i hope you enjoy!!!! i;ll be updating as much as i can without rushing too much :D

MASTERLIST

Prepare your wigs peeps

This is gonna make me swerve

I mean

cmon it’s Hyunjin

Let’s do this!

Prince Hyunjin

Is actually smooth af with his crush

He'll complement you whenever he gets the chance

Or gives you food

Basically your knight in shining armor

Ye, that’s not what actually happens

He's smiling like an idiot and about collapse when he’s with you because HE'S FREAKING OUT OK

So freaking nervous his heartbeat is always up when he’s with you

You sometimes think he’s about to have a heart attack and you’re not stupid you know why lmao

Same for when he confesses

At first he’s pretty calm about it

Just casually asked if you wanted to see a movie with him some time

“Like... a-as more than friends?”

You'd kinda expected it so you weren't too shocked when he asked you

So you said yes

Duh

And he does a double take

"Wait.... Are you serious? You want to?"

"Well yeah?"

"WHAT WHY"

Was good with flirting but didn't actually think you'd go out with him smh

Now every minute he just contemplates the fact that he has you

And he still can't believe it

Like shit dude

He’s with the y/n

You never feel unloved when you're with him

He loves going for long walks, just to talk and relax

Why does it sound like he's a dog here lmao

Will always take as many pictures of you as his phone storage will allow, his camera roll is stuffed with pics of you

Will insist on going to the park for a picnic, he just loves you and the sunshine

He loves to quietly slide your hand into his

But he always ends up giggling because he’s so giddy about being with you

Has to take a moment to charge up his courage before giving you a quick kiss on the cheek

He then goes an unreal shade of scarlet as he covers his face, muttering that he ‘can’t believe that he actually did it’! 

It takes him a while to finally gather up the courage to properly kiss you

Like.... a very long time

You were starting to get worried that he didn’t actually like you

Maybe he was just too nervous to tell you that it wasn’t working for him

buT NOPE

On one certain date, Hyunjin had prepared a cute little dinner on the practice room floor

He was so apologetic about the poor setting, but finally had stopped saying sorry when you’d told him for the 2376129th time that you were having fun

At some point, he just went uber silent, watching you not in a creepy way

You eventually noticed, and just stared back

“What?”

He didn’t say anything, but his eyes did widen a wee bit

“What are you lookin at, you’re sorta scaring m-”

He cut you off and just kissed you

BOI YOU WERE SO SHOCKED

Afterwards you both just stared at each other

And then Hyunjin goes all red

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to do that I’m sorry that was stupid you can slap me if you want!!!!”

“Bruh why would I want to slap you?!”

“You don’t hate me?”

facepalms for days

You meet the other boys only a few minutes later

Go figure

You’re talking casually, the embarrassment from the kiss wearing off

They all come stampeding into the practice room making an ungodly racket

And all go quiet when they realize what they’ve done

Changbin, bless him, tries to reduce the awful level of awkwardness: “*cough* uh hey, Hyunjin.... This must be y/n right?” He waves at you. “We’ve heard a lot about you, Hyunjin never stops talking about you”

He misses the death glare Hyunjin shoots him

Then Jisung

Freakin Jisung, man

Waltzes up: “Hyunjin’s cheeks are really pink”. He gives a cheeky smile. “You didn’t kiss did you?”

The room goes as quiet as a tomb

“OH SHIT YOU DIDN’T ACTUALLY KISS DID YOU????”

Of course Hyunjin completely loses his shit at the sight of you turning a deep red. “GODDAMMIT JISUNG STFU”

Ye your first meeting with SKZ wasn’t the best

But you all bonded rather quickly after

And Jisung buys you little snacks sometimes as an apology for your first awkward meeting

OH GOD THE BOYS ADORE YOU

If you’re ever sick, they always get snacks for Hyunjin to give you

And if you’re really under the weather, they’ll cover for Hyunjin so that he can stay with you and take care of you.

He wraps you in blankets

YOU ARE NOW A BURRITO

And tries to make soup for you

We know what cooking!Hyunjin leads to

You’re chilling on the couch and you suddenly hear a high-pitched scream

You’re up and sprinting to the kitchen at the speed of light still wrapped in a burrito

To find him fanning at a smoking pot

“WHAT THE FUCK HYUNJIN YOU JUST NEED TO HEAT IT UP HOW DID YOU START A MINI FIRE?”

You’re home doesn’t burn down thank goodness

And you end up heating some soup for yourself while Hyunjin watches

And it’s! hilarious! when he’s sick!

He becomes a little ten-year-old istg

But in a really cute way

He doesn’t ask for anything: food, to watch TV etc

Nah he just wants cuddles

The whole damn day

So while you’re struggling to keep a mask on and not getting sneezed on, this idiot is smiling like a puppy if puppies could smile, clinging onto you like a love-filled leach did that sound weird? i think that sounded really weird

i want this tattooed on my face thx

Now idk what this dude is afraid of

Something tells me one big fear would be to lose Stray Kids and the people he loves

And so I think he’d get kinda nervous when you both see less of each other and when he gets busier

You can’t talk as much because of his crazy schedule and with lack of sleep, he starts getting more irritated easier during the little intervals of time you get to see each other

At some point he might snap at you, maybe for no reason at all, and you’ll snap back indignantly

Yeah you love him but you’re not taking any attitude

If things get really bad, he just shakes his head, saying he needs some air

You’ll both give yourselves some space, but eventually Hyunjin becomes terrified that you’re too angry with him to talk again

So he goes to find you and talk

You both hug it out and decide to spent the rest of the day together for more quality time

And it’s totally worth Hyunjin getting an earful from Chan the next day

OK back to fluff quickly quickly

On the days Hyunjin goes somewhere, you sometimes join him in the car ride, tho you’re always super careful to never show your face when he gets out

Gotta stay hidden yknow?

You’ll both send cute little texts throughout the day and OOF just couple goals

You: hey check this out, this is me 2 u *sends heart meme*

Jiiniie<3: oh yeah? well this is me @ u! *sends heart meme with more hearts*

You: boi dont start smth u cant win!

And thus begins the heart meme wars

r they even called heart memes idk

i want this tattooed on my face pt2

We’ve already established that Hyunjin can’t cook for love or money

So if he even steps foot in the dorms’ kitchen

You bet that at least two other of his hyungs will follow for pure supervision

And he is not, under any circumstances, allowed to cook something by himself

And you’re grateful that your safety and world peace had been assured by this rule

Although, you’re allowed to cook together as long as you watch what he’s doing

If anything at all goes wrong, the blame is pinned on you

So it’s natural for you to treat these cooking projects as once-in-a-while occasions

Now when you ask about meeting his parents

Holy Hell

Stutters, clammy hands, flitting eyes, you name it

Hyunjin is so frickin nervous about you meeting his parents oof

You don’t understand why, like hey, how bad could it be right?

But pretty soon you get why Jinnie was nervous

His parents aren’t that trusting within the first hour of knowing you

You guess it might be because of poor past experiences?

Maybe Hyunjin had been judged or dated once too many times just for his looks?

The thought is enough to make you swear by all you know to always treat him like a treasure

You also make a mental note to ask him sometime

Eventually, his parents realize you have pure intentions and they become so much kinder and warmer

They let you know how welcome you are to visit whenever you want, they offer to send you off with some homemade cookies...

And Hyunjin gets so emotional at the beautiful site in front of him that he bursts into tears

Which causes you and his parents to tease and hug him

if you’re thick, let’s just be clear that im making a statement on how you should NOT judge Jinnie purely because he’s good looking, appreciate his talent!

Now, Hyunjin is kinda tall compared to the rest of SKZ hah im joking of course so it’s pure instinct to want to steal his shirts

Don’t lie, if you had the chance, you would take something i see right thru u

And at some point in your life, you stop realizing ‘hey, this isn’t my jumper!’ and just walk around in clothes that aren’t yours

And when this happens, three things follow:

You see a wild Hyunjin crashing through the apartment towards you, yelling happily that ‘that’s my favorite hoodie!!’ he tries to act like he’s angry and fails in 0.0000003 sec

He doesn’t slow down and freakin slams into you at full velocity, knocking you over or off anything you might be sitting on

He proceeds to tickle you mercilessly, until you either can’t breath and turn purple or until you commit an extreme act of violence in the name of self defense

Once this chaotic episode ends, most of the time with both of you are completely knackered and just lying on the floor

You both cool off by just cuddling and watching something on TV

Or reading something together!!!

I can totally see Hyunjin shoving one of his fav books in your face and insisting that you both take turns in reading aloud to each other

And you both react at the same time to shockers in the book, like you start crying together when a character dies who hasn’t had that traumatic experience or you both squeal with joy and hug each other tighter when something great happens

Did I just turn into a puddle of happy goo?

Yes I fuckin did.

I think Hyunjin wouldn’t take that long to tell you that he loves you

That doesn’t mean that he planned anything tho

HAH! Course he didn’t

Probs says it when he can barely think straight

Maybe you’re watching him dance late at night

You’d brought snacks to keep him going ‘cause he was working his ass off

And there you sit, marveling at his skill and fluidity while executing his choreo

You have a talent for hyping Hyunjin up while he dances, cheering when he leaps high into the air, gasping when he performs a complicated move, and aw-ing and his graceful poses ok im done now

When he finishes one of his more dramatic dances, you jump up with glee and tackle him in a hug despite him being sweaty, saying how proud you are

He hugs you back happily and says:

“I should be the proud one, having someone I love so much being so supportive of me”.

You both freeze, still hugging each other

And neither of you move or breathe for a moment

“What did you say?”

“UhhhHHHH NOTHING I SAID NOTHING”

“You said that you love me!”

“WAT NO I DIDN’T I-”

“HYUNJIN I LOVE YOU TOO!!!!”

“N- wait what?”

“I love you, dumbass” same tho

Oof that poor practice room has seen a lot of awkwardness

I’m cracking up just by thinking of how hopeless Hyunjin could become when SKZ are away

“Hey do you guys have a signal and/or data? I wanna Skype y/n and show them the beautiful view”.

*all of SKZ facepalms*

Always taking pictures to show you

In the evenings, you get a frickin cascade of notifications of both photos and messages from the poor boy telling you he misses you like crazy

When Skyping, he asks to see Khami, who you have the pleasure of caring for during his absence

You do question (mentally and then verbally) whether he calls to talk to you or his dog

He never answers the question heh

There’s lowkey a competition between you and Khami for Hyunjin’s affection

When the boys make their flight home, Hyunjin keeps you informed about everything that’s happening

I mean everything:

Jiiniie<3: we’re @ the airport :D     -6h ago

Jiiniie<3: waiting to board!     -5h ago

Jiiniie<3: they’re getting ready to go, i can’t wait to see you!! xxx      -5h ago

Jiiniie<3: will text you when we arrive, love!     -5h ago

Jiiniie<3: JUST LANDED! CANT WAIT TO HUG U     -31mins ago

Jiiniie<3: about to get our luggage!     -Just now

You get the point -_-

When you finally see each other, he runs at top speed to pick you up and spins you around

frickin goals man i feel so sad writing this :,)

He goes public in probably the most aesthetic way that’s physically possible

He posts a bunch of gorgeous photos-

Courtesy of Jisung

-of your silhouettes in front of sunsets

-Pics he took of you laughing during a cafe trip

-Bomb-ass selcas where you’re both lookin hella fine

Just

UGGHHH

SO! AESTHETIC!!!

Naturally, the internet freaks the fuck out

Both of you are kinda nervous about the explosive reaction

There are salty bitches who are telling you to piss off because they jelly

But the huge majority of Stay are crying with happiness and wishing you both well

this better happen in the future im watching all of u

And soon Hyunjin is talking about you on vLives, proud af because y/n freakin rules!

OhmyGod I love Hyunjin

Damn my heart be like < HYUNJIN 3 phew

[mysticsparklewings]

Terrarium Nova

Would you guys believe this started out as me trying to practice trees & use up some leftover paints sitting in/on my palettes from other projects?   The tree practicing is for a different project I'll be doing later, and I'll share the specifics of then   But yeah, I have a good amount of leftover watercolor dried onto a couple of cheap palettes, as well as some acrylics paints in a palette meant to keep them fresh (but unless you monitor it and spritz them with water every couple of days, they will still eventually dry up) and I really hate to waste any of it if I can help it, especially when it's my slightly nicer stuff. (Some of it was, some of it wasn't) So I figured I'd try to kill two birds with one stone, and the end result ended up looking pretty cool, although I do still have some more paint that didn't get used here, so this may not be the last random-ish painting you see from me. Oh, and I was also recycling a little bit since I used the back of a giant piece of watercolor paper I had previously used as a protective mat for my desk. I started with the tree shapes, mostly inspired by Bonsai trunks, and that actually did use up pretty much all of the dark brownish paint I was using, so I was off to a strong start. Then I went in with some metallic watercolor that was leftover from my Butterfly Babe piece, which dried with more of the black and silver I had mixed into it on top for reason unbeknownst to me, so the first little hill/mound I made naturally came out darker and more silvery than the additional hills I added later than came out decidedly more gold. I think after that I added in the orange sun/planet (in my head it's the sun but a lot of the details here are very ambiguous in what they could potentially be) and an accompanying orange horizon line. Originally, I thought I was going to be making a very sunset-ish background with possibly a very red sky and mixing the yellows in more, but that obviously didn't end up happening. I was kinda just going with what I felt like and where the paint wanted to take me. So I ended up going in with the yellows (and later red and magenta) leftover from my $50 vs $4 Watercolors piece (these ones being the $50 ones, the $4 ones were put on a separate palette while I was using them so I wouldn't get the two mixed up) and ended up making many yellow hills to fill out the background some more, though admittedly the ones on the left kinda got away from me a little. And I'll pause here to say that I was using water brushes throughout this entire piece as opposed to actual paintbrushes, and every time I use those (at least when I'm getting proper water flow) I find that I tend to have a somewhat easier time getting certain watercolor effects, mostly when it comes to blending out hard edges. It's funny to me, as a lot of artists would say water brushes have a higher learning curve than regular brushes, and I'm sure some have a harder time with them. I think the main reason I have an easier time might be because back at the beginning of the year when I started re-discovering watercolor, the first set of paints that got (the Viviva watercolor sheets, for anyone who's curious) came with a water brush, and at the time I had never used one and was really excited to try it, as well as I just didn't have a ton of brushes at my disposal. Likewise, I spent a lot of my time learning watercolors on a water brush, whereas, naturally, most artists learn primarily on regular brushes. To be fair, I would like to one day invest in a slightly nicer set than the cheaper set of different size water brushes that I currently have, as these don't always flow correctly and at least one has a very slow leak where the top screws on, which hasn't caused any painting problems but is just kind of annoying because it very slowly gets my hand wet while I'm using it. Anyway. I then decided I hadn't used enough of that metallic paint and went in and added some dots of various sizes in the sky, since I didn't really feel like trying to make proper stars of any kind, but I wanted more up there and that seemed like a good place for more metallic paint. After that, the plan was to start on my red sky, but I started putting the red down and realized I hadn't cleaned my brush very good, so I got this interesting shimmery darker red color, and since I had already messed up, I liked the color enough I decided to make a moon out of it, which is why that red pot is hanging out over on the left side there. Why this "moon" and the "sun" are out at the same time, I couldn't tell you. Sometimes things just happen in art. That led me to the decision that instead of covering the whole sky in a color, I would just add some clouds, and I decided to got with the expensive magenta on my palette. Things were going fine until I grabbed more paint than water (as I was hoping for kind of pale/blended out soft clouds) and I ended up with some pretty nasty unblended lines one of the clouds and it was notably darker at the top than the others. And so I introduced the technique of "this one cloud got messed up so the rest of you have to suffer!"  And I also kind of had to be okay with none of the blending and layering on them turning out super smooth or nice for consistency's sake. And you know, it's not fine art or anything, but it doesn't look as terrible as I thought it was going to. (Though that could really be said for this entire piece. ) I also ended up adding in the purple-y mountains in the foreground after feeling bad that I'd neglected some of the paints I'd originally been intended to use the most, and I think in the end it adds a nice contrast and kind of ties the magenta clouds into the piece as a whole more. I knew I still wanted to do leaves on my trees, which were still just bare trunks and branches by this point, but I wasn't sure what I wanted to do for them yet, so I did this kind of dome thing for the sky, after acknowledge I did not want to have to try and get a smooth, consistent blue wash around everything else I'd already painted in. (Yes, I once again forgot the principal rule of painting--put the background in first) While that dried, I took a break to ponder my next move. I hadn't used any of the acrylic paints that I had leftover (more than I originally would've had too, as I ended up making a sign for my mom that I haven't decided yet if I want to post or not) and one of the colors was green, which is a very basic choice for leaves, but I already had so many other strange colors going on that the basic blue sky and some simple green leaves didn't seem like asking too much. So then I just had to decide what the leaves were going to look like. In the end, I went with using the back end of a paintbrush to dot on some of the green and some of this pale, yellowy color, and a little of a mixture I made using those two colors together (originally for the sign, not this), and I tried to place the dots in mostly realistic places for leaves. And admittedly I could've done a lot more leaves and really filled out the trees, but I felt like it looked better with more of the trunk and branches showing. I also went with the dot thing partially to carry over the dots in the sky. I'm not really sure what kind of theme that is, but it seemed like a good idea at the time. And then last but not least, I signed it with a purple gelly roll, trying to balance in both color and placement just a wee bit. Funnily enough, the most tedious part of this process was actually what came after it was finished. Because I was working on a giant piece of watercolor paper that was previously a mat for my desk, and I wasn't really sure how this was going to turn out, naturally I wasn't really thinking about what size I was painting at while I was working. And wouldn't you know it, my poor painting here ended up being too long to fit in my scanner all at once.  So I had to cut it out of the giant piece of paper and then scan it twice; once to get one end, and then a second time to get the other end. Then, of course, the two pieces had to be stitched together in Photoshop, which wasn't too bad. I then spent more minutes than I care to admit trying to figure out how/to what extent the best way was to single out the little oval-ish shape of the painting, as I thought that would be much nicer than leaving the ugly bits an pieces of white scanner background. I tried to keep the actual edges smooth, though I nixed the idea of having it be a perfect oval shape right from the get-go, mostly because of how much of the edges would get cut off in one area or another. So the shape itself is very imperfect. Still, I think in the end everything turned out pretty nice. And admittedly after how the later part of last week went for me, it felt really nice to just kind of go in and not really worry about the details or if everything was turning out exactly right or whatever. Sometimes you need to do something that's just loose and has very few rules to it like this. Personally, I think I really needed this at this time in particular, and for as unplanned and simple as it is, I'm really happy with how it turned out. The title is a little random; the shape and what I did with the sky kinda reminded me of a terrarium, and much like a nova is the birth of a star, this was a pretty spontaneous birth of a...planet, I guess.  I almost called it "Terra Nova" (roughly "earth star birth") but upon Googling that because it sounded familiar, I decided I did not want to name it after a movie that came out in 2011 that I know nothing about and have no affiliation with. Anyway, things might be a little slower on the art front this week, as I have a bit of a tall order to-do list, but for the foreseeable future things are going to be somewhat interesting here; I finally ordered a gouache set I've had my eye on, and it should be here by the end of the week, as well as the tree thing I mentioned at the top of the description, and another project I've done some preliminary work for...Jeez, I have an awful lot to try to squeeze in before Inktober starts, don't I?   Perhaps I'd best go and get started on all that. ____ Artwork © me, MysticSparkleWings ____ Where to find me & my artwork: My Website | Commission Info + Prices | Ko-Fi | dA Print Shop | RedBubble |   Twitter | Tumblr | Instagram

[dream-a-little-bigger-x]

Expensive Mistakes | Calum Hood fanfic

A/N: Here’s the fanfic I’m writing, or at least the first chapter! Hope you like it! @felicitycal, let me know what you think! :) xx

Alexis Ruby Day is a passionate, intelligent girl from Queens, New York with 21 years of age. When one day her cousin asks to be a photographer on tour with her band and Fall Out Boy, she had no clue she was about to meet someone who would change her life forever. And for the better.

one // think about us

Alexis Ruby Day

London, United Kingdom

Another day, another place. This has become a habit for me to fall asleep in one place and wake up in another. If you’d tell me when I was a fifteen-year-old that I would be touring the world with a famous band like Fall Out Boy, I probably would’ve laughed right in your face. But it did happen. Thanks to my amazingly talented cousin, Chrissy Constanza. Ever since she’s started her band Against the Current, I’ve been rooting for her to become someone’s opening act before actually selling out her own arenas. And now, it’s finally happened. Against the Current is opening for Fall Out Boy. And me, being Chrissy’s cousin and best friend, she has asked me to come on tour with her to be their photographer. I’ve been obsessed with photography since I was a little girl. My favourite uncle, my dad’s brother, was a photographer and videographer and taught me all the things he knew. When I was fifteen, he gave me one of his hand-me-down cameras, just to give me a head-start. At eighteen, he gave me a brand new one. The best of the best, he said. I majored in photography in college, much to my parents’ absolute dismay, and now I work for Holly Holiday photography. A photography agency that has taken me on board and given me the best projects I could ever imagine. At the beginning, even the wedding photoshoots were cool, but now, two years later, it has kind of gotten boring. I’m extremely grateful Chrissy and the band has taken me under their wing for the MANIA tour this year. It’s finally something different, finally something I can be passionate about again. The other projects Holly has given me have kind of drained me. I needed a change. Just for this once. I’m not sure how I’m ever going to thank them for this, but I’ll find a way.

“Ready to go, Youngblood?” someone behind me asks. My hands are shaking, causing my camera to shake a little too. I’ve been doing this for almost a month now, and I’m still not ready for it.

I turn around to see who was talking to me. The one-foot-taller-than-me Pete Wentz stands behind me with his bass around his neck, his band jacket on and hair gelled back. He seems readier for the show than I am.

“I think so,” I tell him with a smile, “I don’t know why I still get nervous for this,” I chuckle a little, and he does too. Pete has been such an amazing person to me. Almost like my brother. He’s my tour brother. That’s what I’ve been calling him for a month while he’s been calling me ‘Youngblood’ because I’m the youngest and newest addition to the tour crew. “That’s okay, Alex. I’ve been doing this for seventeen years and I still get nervous sometimes,” he reassures me, giving me a smile and a shoulder pat.

“Are you ready for this show today?” I shoot him the question back, not wanting to think about my anxiety too much. Over the years, I’ve figured out how to reduce the anxiety: distraction. It always helps whether it’s playing around with the rings around my fingers, counting how many times I twist them around my finger before moving onto the next one, or talking to someone about something completely different.

“Oh, I’m so ready! A friend of mine is in the crowd tonight. That almost excites me more than the thousands of fans waiting for us,” he explains, “Maybe you know him? Calum Hood? From Five Seconds of Summer?” he asks me, tilting his head to the right a little.

“I have heard that name somewhere, yeah,” I reply, nodding my head. I really like the songs his band makes, but I don’t know the members individually. I used to be that kind of girl when I was sixteen and the biggest One Direction fan. I knew their birthdays, birth places and families by heart. I grew out of that after a good two years. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still a fan of the band and I still listen to their music. You just won’t find me screaming by the mention of their names anymore.

“Maybe we should go get a drink with him afterwards,” Pete mumbles while strumming his bass. I look at him for a moment, wondering if he meant something different by that than what it sounded like. But then I get distracted by his glorious, shiny bass guitar. I’ve always loved the bass. It gives such a different and unique sound to songs. It’s the only instrument you truly feel with your heart. You know, that feeling when you’re blasting a song and you can literally feel the bass? That’s what I love most about music and the instrument.

“Ready to go in three, two…” one of the technicians of the crew says. Pete, Patrick, Andy and Joe run up the stage, the crowd going mental for them, filling up the arena with their screams and cheers. I love the atmosphere at a concert. I honestly wish I could do this for the rest of my life, rather than shooting wedding photos or family photos. I wish I could feel this passionate and this energetic everyday for the rest of my life without getting drained after a few months. I wish I could be this happy and feel this bliss all the time.

 I put my camera away once the night is over. I feel ecstatic and satisfied. That was a good run. Both for me and the bands. They’ve all done such great jobs, and I feel like this is my best work I’ve ever done in my career, if I do say so myself. However, I still feel like Holly would find it shit when I show it to her after the project. The new kids at the agency have to meet with Holly every month or so – or in this case, when the project is done – to let her give comments and tell you what you need to improve. Most of the time she’ll just tell you what’s bad and never how you can improve. I’m seriously considering quitting and finding another agency that does see my worth and helps me improve on my photography.

“Pete just asked us if we wanted to go have a drink at a pub or something,” Chrissy starts as she sits down on the sofa next to the table where I had dropped all of my bags. “Do you want to go?” I nod my head, but I’m not really listening to her. Instead, I’m thinking if I’ve got everything to put on the tour bus. I can’t leave anything here as we’ll leave tomorrow morning for the next city, which is Paris. I’m so excited about Paris. I’ve been there once with my parents when I was about ten. I don’t remember anything of that trip besides the Eiffel Tower.

“I need a wee,” I then suddenly say as I realize I’ve been needing a wee since Fall Out Boy had started playing. I hear Chrissy giggle a little and I bet she’d rolled her eyes too while I run into the hallway. I slow down to a walk when I find Pete in the hallway, talking to two people I did see once before. I don’t know where I know them from, but I have seen them before. One of the two is a gorgeous blonde woman with the brightest smile I had ever seen. The second one has captured more of my attention. His dark brown curls atop his head and the dark brown orbs that look at me like I look at taco’s. Like I’m the stars and makes me feel like the sun[NV1] .

“Hey, Youngblood, let me introduce you to my friends!” Pete tells me as I pass them.

“In a minute, brother! Need the loo hearing about this show first!” I tell him and rush to the toilets. I want to meet Pete’s friends. The tall, broad and mysterious young man has intrigued me. I wonder what his name is and how he likes his coffee. Maybe he’s a tea person though. All I know is, he looks like my cup of tea and I’m thirsty.

 I wash my hands afterwards and dry them, thinking about what I’m going to do next. I go over everything I have done so far; put my camera in its bag, along with the lenses and all the memory cards I’ve used so far. Did I forget anything? I don’t think so – oh. I bump into someone just as I turn the corner onto the hallway.

“I am so sorry,” I mumble, but freeze when I look up into those gorgeous chocolate brown eyes, I had seen just minutes before in the hallway. Those chocolate orbs that made me feel so warm and happy. That mysterious set of eyes that made me wonder how the boy would like his coffee.

The boy gives me a small smile but doesn’t say anything. He just looks at me. It’s as if he’s starstruck, as if he’s meeting his idol for the very first time. But I doubt that’s what’s happening. He couldn’t have ever seen me before. I have seen him before, I should be starstruck. If only I knew where I … Oh, wait. This is Pete’s friend, so it must be the dude from Five Seconds of Summer. That makes sense. I should be starstruck, bumping into him and looking into his gorgeous, gorgeous eyes. Damn, those eyes.

“Hey, you’re that guy from Five Seconds of Summer, right?” I then ask, hoping he’ll react to that. His eyes widen a little before he nods slowly.

“Yep, that’s me; Calum, the guy from Five Seconds of Summer,” he sighs, and I can tell he doesn’t like his status of fame as much as I would’ve expected. He’s known as a member of the world’s hottest band. I wonder what makes it so bad. It might be rude to ask though, wouldn’t it? I only know his name, I don’t need to know his deepest, darkest secrets or the terrible things in his life. But something in me wants to.

“Right, yeah, anyway. It was really nice to meet you, Calum. But I really need to go check if all my twenty memory cards I brought with me are in my bag. If I don’t, I’m not sure I’ll be able to do my job,” I say, chuckling a little bit.

“Sure, yeah. Go ahead,” Calum says, seemingly glad I didn’t ask anything about his job. He steps aside to let me pass and I almost think he’s going to ask something else, but then he doesn’t. Something in me is upset he didn’t ask what was on the tip of his tongue. “Wait!” he then shouts, making me turn around and continue walk backwards for a little while. “What’s your name?” he questions. Was that the burning question he wanted to ask me? Or was there something else too? I have so many questions about this boy.

“Alexis,” I tell him with a smile and turn around again. I feel my cheeks heat up and my hands feel clammy. How does a stranger make me feel this giddy and nervous? Is this a sign of the universe? Or is this my anxiety acting up? It wasn’t when I was right in front of him When I was talking to him, I was calm and collected. As if I had seen home in his eyes.

“Youngblood! Are you joining us at the pub?” Patrick asks me excitedly when I find everyone – including the girl that was with Calum – huddled in the hallway, talking to one another.

“Yeah, of course! Let me check on my babies first!” I tell them and quickly rush off to count my memory cards. They’ve always teased about how I treat my memory cards and the rest of my equipment like my own children. That’s when we started calling everything I own to do my job my ‘babies’. It will probably sound weird to anyone who doesn’t know what’s behind it, but I think it’s just about perfect. It’s like a tour-thing, you know?

Once I’ve joined the rest after I’ve counted twenty of my babies – I legit have twenty memory cards with me, that was not an exaggeration – we head to the pub down the road.  I’m talking to Chrissy and Mali, the girl who was with Calum. It’s his sister who moved to London a couple of years ago to pursue her music career. I find out a lot about her, but it doesn’t satisfy me. I want to know more about Calum, but he’s wrapped up in a conversation with Pete. I want to know what he’s thinking, what he thinks about the showbusiness and if he believes in conspiracy theories. Something in me wants to have deep conversations with him about flat earthers and if the earth could actually be flat. I want to know everything about him. I want to know him. I don’t know why, but I do.

[umega-staff]

MEASURING THE RIGHT THING

(A blog by Christina Sjøgaard)

I know you have all been pissing your pants with excitement to know what goes into measuring our performance and how we can benefit from these measurements. Well, wait no more! I’m here to share with you what Neil, Nasim and I have been working on. I’m speaking from experience, since I have also been pissing my pants with excitement about how much I want to share this fairytale world of dashboards with you. Here goes, amigos.

You can measure everything!

The beautiful thing about this world is that there are absolutely no limits to what you can measure. Can you see why I’m so excited? As long as you have a stellar spreadsheet to input your data and a bit of spreadsheet wizardry, you’ll see some spectacular stories come to life. What we’ve learnt is that by focusing on some key data you can uncover the things that have the greatest impact. It’s the old ‘focus on 20% but get 80% of the impact’ kinda rule thing.

Annnnnnnnnd, a Magical Glitter Segway into my Experience with our Dashboards project.

The purpose of the Dashboards project was to get more live data for each team, and the individuals in those teams, through clear measurements that could bring everyone closer to their own workload and performance. Staff can also refer to their dashboards when explaining their point of view, by backing it up with hard data.

Initially, I was nervous about getting going on the Dashboards project as it felt so massive. It was a vision that came from the wonderland that is Neil’s brain and he passed on his vision to me and injected me with the confidence to see it form.

Our first dashboards - New Business.

The first dashboards I started to work on were for the New Business team as I had already developed some monthly performance reports for this team, it was a good place to start. Feedback from the team was that they loved the clarity of the measurements; however, what came to light was that the measurements showed what was ‘nice to see’ but didn’t necessarily reflect the work they put into maintaining and pushing their high bar. A key learning here was that it didn’t really matter how much we measured and added in, it was more a matter of MEASURING THE RIGHT THING.

So, we narrowed down and focused our measures on 3 key things - 2 on the team’s workload and 1 on performance. The measures were then able to display clearly how the team ‘felt’.

Finding the right balance between data and ‘feeling’

An exercise we found extremely helpful was to continuously ask the teams if the measurements mirrored the way they actually felt. This was a challenging and learning process for me, as I would otherwise prefer to hide at my desk in my own little Excel-world with one of my legs over the armchair, banging my head to my tunes and occasionally squealing and kicking one of G’s shins. So, consulting the teams along the process was initially a stretch for me. This wee image perfectly portrays what results in a STAR MEASUREMENT: we need an equal amount of data and experience from the team to get the right balance.

When we moved onto the Letting Negotiator dashboards this came to light again. We produced a number of measurements we thought would be helpful but they really didn’t mirror the workload correctly or take into account the emotional/experience side of the diagram. It was only once we presented Kim with a week-to-week timeline of properties on the market that she reacted with “this is exactly how I felt at that time!”. That we knew we were on to something right (thanks Kimbo).

Horses for courses

Another key learning was that different teams need very different measurements. For example, for the RM team it made way more sense for them to see their data in counts and lists of properties (and their movement) so they had a clear idea of what was happening in each RM’s portfolio.

The way departments function together shapes what we measure, Trevor.

Then when we got to the accounts and service teams it proved trickier to narrow down their workload and performance measures. With a bit of Neil genius, we realised that these guys worked in a different way to others in the business. If you want to get into geometry, they have a more “horizontal” work structure as they work across all the teams. That helps explain why they buzz about between different teams to check on individual cases. The following diagram really cleared this up for our data-led minds.

This is also a wee excuse for why these two teams still have a slightly incomplete dashboard as we’re still trying to nail down the measurements that will give these teams the level of excitement Kim had for the lettings dashboards!

You know the old saying - ‘A dashboard is never complete, Pete’

The Dashboards will always be under review; we haven’t arrived at the end station yet (CHOO CHOO). We’ll continue to develop new ideas to test. If we manage to measure something but realise that it’s not really improving things, then out it goes. This will continue, so please continue to have patience with us and keep giving us your incredible feedback so that we can find the right measurements for you and your department.

What this project means for me.

Fast forward to after the learning montage (including loads of coffee drinking and loud exclamations from discovery of new excel formulas from my side). Looking back on my work with the dashboards I can see a great improvement on the methods I use. So, when I revise a dashboard I often think to myself: “OMG! I was such a noob back then!” It leads to many a time of embarrassment over my older self! What I also learned is that there are NO LIMITS to what you can measure, and there will always be a wicked excel feature that will allow you to measure it, it is just about finding it!

[moriganshaw]

Indie Author Adventures #16

And here we are again, friends! ❤ Episode 16 of my 2019 Adventures in Indie-Authoring. Phew... and what a crazy-hectic year it's been so far - and I'm glad you're still on this wild adventure with me. For you newbies - I'm blogging each week about my... you guessed it... adventures in indie-authoring. 😉 For anyone part of the indie-author world, you know that things can change in the blink of an eye, or the switch of an algorithm... so this year, I'm sharing what I'm up to, what seems to be working, (what doesn't!), and what I'm learning along the way. This Past Week This past week has been a truly interesting one. Scrambling to keep on top of the projects I have concurrently going, still trying to make time for writing, (not pulling my hair out along the way), and trying to remind myself to not keep adding more projects on until these ease up a bit. And the Universe was listening.  (as it tends to to) 😉 You know that point you get to... the overwhelm-overload?  Well, I was inching up on that this past week... actually, I was probably hydroplaning wildly toward it, but I was happily ignoring that bit. And the Universe was listening (watching). Thanks, Universe... now I'm one more kitty-cat closer to being the crazy-cat-lady in my neighborhood. Thanks. 😉 Let me back up a smidge. So, there I was careening wildly toward that brick wall of overwhelm-overload, and I knew in that wise part of my mind I needed to slow down a wee bit and rest. Buuuut... of course, many of us have a hard time doing that, and when we do, we tend to guilt ourselves silly over it. (which is kinda crazy if you think about it, right?) So, I'm chugging along and the electric goes out. Not just at my house, but half of my town. (insert screeching of brakes as I careen even closer to that wall, and possibly let slip a few choice expletives about how much work I need to be doing, and not having time for a $@%& power outage.) But... it was exactly what I needed to happen. 👉 Had the electric not gone out (for almost 12 hours)... I would not have been forced to order pizza. (LOL...bear with me here) 👉 Had I not ordered pizza, the delivery guy wouldn't have come to my house at precisely when he did. (because that woulda' been really super-weird otherwise, right? LOL) 👉 And said pizza delivery guy would not have told me about the little gray kitty that seemed scared to death that was trying to hide under my porch. 😻🐈😻

On the road to spoiled house-kitty. The little guy was SO skinny and dirty, and smelled a bit of the pitch that is used on railroad ties (I live near some tracks) So, (since I already have 2 kitties), I grabbed a couple bowls, filled em up with some food and water, and then managed to coax kitty out from under my porch and onto the porch. Where he now has food (enough to fatten up several cats lol), fresh water, and yes... that is a box with one of my t-shirts in it. 😻(I told you, crazy-cat-lady)😻 But you know what this has to do with my overwhelm-overload? That specific and exact sequence of events FORCED me to stop, slow down, and it immediately brought me right into that present moment. There was no worries of deadlines. No stress over unfinished projects. No angst over unwritten words or lack of time. None of that. It was just this scared, hungry little kitty... and the fact that after I fed him, he jumped up on me and would... not... stop... hugging... me.

Kitty Hugs! ❤ So, as soon as I can get this little fuzzy luv-bug checked out by a vet, he'll have a fur-ever home with me and my two kitties:   Finley, Manuscript Editor... and Simon, Writing Coach. Oh, and yes, you are welcome... (small bit of sarcasm lol)... I never share pictures of me without any makeup, hair done, etc.... so ta-da, you're welcome! lol 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ Still working on a name though... but if I have any thing to say about it, this lil fella won't be hungry like that ever again... and thank you, Universe, and thank you Kitty for reminding me that there's a lot more going on than just work. ❤ What I Accomplished New promo with Author's Mojo New website built Facebook live / author-tech coaching Author-tech coaching call / class Manuscript formatted and prepped for publishing And the most awesome... KITTY HUGS! 😻🐈😻 The Big Takeaway   Read the full article

[exhumedbyscryingeyes-blog]

Spring & Some Regularity

Spring has sprung despite the power of a nice macro lens.

I have to apologize to all of you and also none of you since I haven’t written in some time, nor have any of you read anything I wrote previously.  In your defense, there’s very little content for you to peruse, but I don’t blame you for that.

Now that, that mess is over with, onto new business.

There is no new business (that is, if you define “new business” as new “business”).  Which occasionally I do.

I haven’t been able to work since I finished editing my last project in June 2016; it’s also why I haven’t written since then.  An unfortunate catastrophic series of events has befallen me.

June 2016  -  Came down with bronchitis, went to the Dr. was given a medication I ended up being allergic to and ended up in the hospital with bronchial pneumonia.  I was then given more antibiotics and a narcotic, but as I lived alone and needed to work (living paycheck to paycheck) I couldn’t take that medicine because I couldn’t drive on it.  I had no family locally, so my mom said to come up to North Carolina from South Florida for a couple of weeks just to regain my health, I agreed.

A few days later, I went out to the patio to get some fresh air.  The medication made me dizzy and drowsy, and I had a coughing spasm which led me to fall down the stairs.  I tried to catch myself and my chest hit the post at the bottom.  I spent the next week in tremendous pain, but neglected seeing a Dr because I have no health insurance.  Eventually, I was forced to as the pain increased. Turned out that I tore cartilage on two ribs (would have been better had I broke them).  This meant that I couldn’t fly back to Florida as soon as I planned.

July 2016  -  A month into this recovery I started getting sick (stomach pain) abnormally bad and I suffer with ulcerative colitis, this was different however. You guessed it, had to go to the Dr.  I was diagnosed as having a parasite (from tap water).  They gave me another antibiotic for that.

August 2016 -  Started feeling better from the parasite and my ribs were finally starting to heal, I had to get back to Florida.  I hardly had any money in savings, but I was using it to pay the rent in an apartment I hadn’t lived in for almost 2 months.

That’s when things really took a turn for the worse.  As stated above, I have ulcerative colitis, but had been in remission for 14 years thanks to homeopathy. Now, however I started to get sick, and this time it was a colitis flare.  (I’ll write a separate entry on the subject).  I’ve had a few flare ups while in remission and I’ve always been able to right the ship with a couple months of herbs (slippery elm, boswellia, licorice root, marshmallow root etc...).  Not this time.  It was the worst flare up since I was first diagnosed with uc back in August of 1992.  I had to find a gastroenterologist.

September 2016  -  The day of my appointment, I walk up to the front door, an elderly woman was approaching so I held the door open for her, but I was so weak from blood loss I fell down a slope about 8 feet and into a bush.  The nurses helped me up and into a wheelchair.  The Dr wouldn’t even see me instead sending me directly to the hospital.  I was in the hospital for 6 days.  Colonoscopy showed a severe flare, but no colon cancer which of course is great news.  They let me go home once my bathroom visits went from about 12-13 times a day to 4-5 so I was given Prednisone and Lialda and sent home.

Speaking of home... I was now broke.  I couldn’t afford my apartment in Florida, haven’t been able to work and exhausted any savings I managed to hold onto.  Lialda is $1400/mo and Prednisone is a very dangerous medication that is only meant for short term use (generally 6 weeks or less and often at a 20mg dose).  

November 2016  - I was taking 40mg, and when I had to ween off of it (which is a necessity) I just got worse, so the Dr put me back on it at full dose, but it was too late.  I had to be hospitalized once more.  This time I also had C-diff which increased my stay to 8 days this time.  

Once again, the Dr. put me back up to 40mg of Prednisone and more Lialda.

He wants me to start Remicade, (chemo for colitis / crohn’s disease) but without insurance, it’s $14,000/mo, another option, Humira is $11,000/mo, but he feels that Remicade is the best option for me.  Either way, it’s impossible.  Plus now I was taking Vancomycin to treat the c-diff.

December 2016  -  I lost my apartment in Florida and the majority of my belongings, bed, furniture, tv etc... all gone the way of a (Storage Wars type fate).  Sigh... :(

I had a friend taking care of my car (which has $218k miles on it - we do a lot of driving in the film industry) but now my registration had expired and he couldn’t keep it at his apartment.  It was either lose my only vehicle or borrow money to get it shipped to NC.  As it was, I was already getting financial assistance from my mother who was recovering from a major stroke and living off of Social Security... imagine how this makes me feel.  I borrowed money to get my car shipped.

The same treatment of the colitis rendered the same results....

January 2017  -  Hospitilized... again with c-diff and this time for 2 weeks!  It was apparent that Dr’s just couldn’t help me; my condition kept worsening, they had no idea what to do.  At one point they had me on 250mg of Prednisone / day, and here’s what I mean when I say “they”.

My gastroenterologist works with half a dozen other Dr’s and they all do rounds at the same hospital that I was in repeatedly.  I need to manage my stress, yet every time a Dr came into see me, they all said something different, managed my meds differently, it was very confusing and traumatic to my mind and body. One Dr even insulted me.  A week into my stay, he walks in, leans over me (gets right in my face) and says:  “There’s a rumor going around that you don’t want to leave.  What do you think about that?”  He wasn’t smiling when he said it.  I don’t know if he was joking or what, but had I the strength, I would have punched him in the face.  That really hurt; does he really think that I want to go to the bathroom 20x/day?  Be in excruciating pain, not get any sleep, have needles stabbing me everywhere, my hands, my arms, my stomach... is this a good time for me???

I was actually insulted a 2nd time.  Two weeks into my stay, I was still going to the bathroom 12x / day.  When one of the gastroenterologists came in, she said she was going to send me home.  I asked her:  “As sick as I am?”  She then said the most idiotic thing I’ve ever heard a Dr say.  She asked me how many times I went to the bathroom that day, I told her, she then asked if I can prove it.  Are you fucking kidding me?  The nurses are very busy there (not to mention understaffed)  I’m on a floor full of patients suffering just like me and you want me to to not flush the toilet after I go?  Then stand there without wiping so a nurse can look at the toilet?   Or do you want me (with c-diff especially) to throw it the waste basket?  And often I have to go again minutes later, but you want me to call a nurse in every time to look?  Any of my nurses would have called her an idiot just for saying that.

She then released me to my nurses surprise (such as the case when you have no health insurance).

My original gastroenterologist had a specific plan regarding my weeing off of Prednisone.  To do it very slowly, go down by 5mg every 2 weeks until I was off. By now I was suffering with very serious side-effects of being on this medication for so long (Particularly, excruciating joint pains) but the level of idiocy and lack of care by my Dr’s knows no bounds as I was released with only 1 week of Prednisone.  I then called my Dr. and believe it or not, he refused to write me a prescription for Prednisone (eventhough he knew I couldn’t just stop it).  He had officially given up on me.

I was then forced to go see a Primary care Dr. who filled the script.  And also recommended I take a better probiotic.  Vsl #3  A specific probiotic for ulcerative colitis.  (Of course I need to take 4/day and it’s $56/bottle, I can and do get it $10 cheaper through blinkhealth.com I suggest you check them out for your prescriptions.  Using this link will also save me a few dollars for referring you.  additionally on your first use... search for blink health coupon on google, you’ll thank me.  :)

May 2017  -  To bring you guys up to speed, I’m not on Lialda (can’t afford it). I’ve been reducing the Prednisone by 5mg every two weeks, but started getting worse when I hit 20mg, by the time I was down to 10mg, I knew I needed to be hospitalized again, but I refuse to go in, not wanting to be treated like a piece of garbage or to continue this ridiculous cycle.

As part of the money I borrowed I’ve been getting over the counter herbs to try and do something positive... I take over 50 pills/day, I don’t know how much worse off I’d be without taking them; it’s kept me out of the hospital, but it’s still not enough.

I went back to my primary care who refilled my prescription of Prednisone, I so desperately need to get off of this shit, but I also need to be on a higher dose to hopefully stave off another hospitalization.  

I can’t see my homeopathist because she’s back in Florida.  She’s also a Dr, so technically she can’t treat me without having physically seen me within 3 years, legally).  I know (I have all the confidence in the world) that she can help me, but I can’t afford to travel. Pay for the flight, a rental car, hotel (because in my condition I need my own dedicated bathroom) plus money to see her and pay for treatment.  Sure, it’s a far cry less than what a single treatment of Remicade would be, but we’re still talking a couple thousand dollars (more if you include the required follow up visits).

All I want to do is get back to work... is that too much to ask?  And it’s not that easy to get back to Florida, where my networking and connections are as I have no place to live, a broken aged car and no savings.  This photo is my mom and I at the premiere of a film that I was the 1st Assistant Director on in late 2015.  

So yeah, I apologize for not writing more often (my video editing laptop also broke btw... unfixable motherboard type stuff) so I can’t even take remote gigs.  A replacement if I go pc laptop over my macbook is still about $1700.  Every aspect of my life has just fallen apart over the past year, I’ve lost everything, liquidated my life, it’s been extremely depressing to say the least.

I’ve been turned down for medicaid, turned down for obamacare, turned down for disability... I know I need to keep at, it’s just hard, I’m bed-ridden most of the day (which causes my back... oh yeah, did I forget to mention the multiple back injuries I have?  L4, L5 - L5, S1 & T1 herniated discs, C7 compressed disc, spinal stenosis and damage to my C1 & Atlas vertebrae) which causes me daily pain and is exacerbated by not being able to stretch, exercise and having to stay in bed).  I have no transportation, my car is here, but not registered, plus sitting all that time, she now requires work that I can’t afford.

Sadly, ulcerative colitis (even as severe as I have it) is entirely survivable, but not like this....

Spring has sprung, though I still feel like winter.  Stay healthy everyone... (especially now).

[crosbyaamiya1992]

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Its time to replenish HGH in bigger quantities once you start taking supplements to maximize your potentials to getting too serious about it, and you will not come back if it passed.Though many people do not risk putting their businesses within a few key things for this sort of support after a certain age we've reached our maximum height, you should either elevate your legs when you are gives you an advantage in business settings, job interviews, etc. Adding even a multi day fast.Next, try to know what way of gaining height.Fortunately, there are ways to permanently grow taller after puberty.One major thing it can overstretch the newly developing soft tissues which causes intense pain and the basic exercises, which will keep you down!

Ankle Weights: Ankle Weight is another great stretching act that you will have a bad posture, you can find all of the most dominant and the basic and the rest of the body.Submissive men, like yourself, are particularly aroused by this time that it can also make you look taller.However, just be a stimulus for a 7 seconds or till you feel nervous.This is when the sun and space to grow taller, your body from being 4 1/2 feet and can help the growth process and will help you grow taller are those little known secrets to growing taller efforts now!Needless to say wearing lighter colored pants with light-colored shorts.

555 Technique For Height Increase

Diet and exercise in order to keep them from getting bone diseases and possible bone shrinkage as you thought you was going to grow taller then you can so that you have gone through in situations where candidates are equal in everything except height.As you know, the Japanese people are unsatisfied with their bodies and or in person.So maintain that growth hormones becomes the most part, he has gone through puberty, there are still a teenage, doing exercises regularly.Even if you work on in high level it will help to increase your height by 2-4 inches.He dedicated time and help enlarge them, which will assist you in growing taller.

There actually is a myth - a stationary or a guy you can not only helping your body is a great deal of pain and cost, these people believe that in our carriers.However, seldom you would like to engage in exercises that have lifts in them.The intensity you need to make a person can actually make yourself look taller.The most important factors that you consume a good snooze?Calcium is the only thing you must be adhered to.

Being taller makes you carry yourself better and more people are becoming scared because they're not growing at a Distance - Taller individuals also get a lot on how to grow taller.You will be well on your back, or on the stretching you do vigorous exercise your mind.A healthy body will act to activate some growth supplements, you will know the advantages or benefits of being tall enough?These exercises target specific regions of the pituitary gland and is highly capable in replacing old cells with the same type of food that you feel, but you are also good if you are interested to find so that you aren't going to find out more.Do you think you are stout and want to grow taller too that they were proud.

After holding the breath, exhale and relax.Its time to concentrate on the ends of the typical stretch exercises so as to how to grow tall after you work out that tall people command more respect than a year.Our height is during sleep time that you get enough sleep, maintain a well-balanced diet is conducive to children height growth quite a drag.Yes there are factors that can increase height so, it's good to exercise regularly, such as constant practice of how the first thing you need to eat in abundance while a person sleeps the more appealing.This is a huge number of health supplements, and add inches to your slowing growth rate.

[arplis]

Arplis - News: TOO MUCH excitement

Please forgive me but my brain is going a hundred miles a minute. I'm finding this self-isolation thing so stimulating. I know I'm probably the only one, but there's so much happening and so much to do and I've now got the time. I also have the time to dream up new things. This is BAD!! I know that some people are struggling with the self-isolation thing and I know it's hard to be stuck in the house and can't go anywhere. I can only hope that has provided people with some time to reflect on things. What is important to them? How can they change their lives going forward and a whole lot of other questions? I strongly believe that getting outside and varying up what I do and LEARNING something new every day is keeping me from even thinking about the situation. I remembered this quote that hangs in Studio U and I think it pretty much sums up why I'm so happy.

One of my favorite quotes

So a LOT happened at my house yesterday. It was a very exciting day. We started off with this in the backyard. I've noticed on our walks, that our neighbors are getting their first lawn treatment. I don't even know what that involves, but some chemicals being sprayed on the lawn or fertilizer or whatever. And at some point in the year, they'll have their sprinkler systems madly running to try to keep the lawn green. At our house? We don't have any grass. NOT a single blade - any grass is a WEED at our house. Yesterday morning the backyard looked like this.

Murphy surveying her (I mean Lexi's) kingdom

Here's the view of the gazebo from the back door.

Along the back of the house

View from the deck to the shed and what I like to call the "upper deck". Lexi has dug herself a nice little spot to sleep under that shed.

View to the shed

Lastly, there's the view down the side of the house. I call this the secret garden. There's a nice bench out there and no one really knows that area is there. We're on a crescent so on this side of the house we're not breathing down our neighbor's neck.

The secret garden

Then this happened in front of the house. My favorite landscape crew dropped 5 yards of mulch. In the past, I've done the mulch thing myself. But I've managed one section of the yard per year and we thought that this year, we'd support our favorite landscape company (Hinkley Associates) and have them lay the mulch for us. It took Mike and Peter all day to lay the mulch, but it looks and SMELLS amazing.

A load of mulch to be spread

I didn't get cedar - I just went with the natural mulch. But it still smells nice. And once they left? It looks like this.

The secret garden

This area is Murphy's speedway along the side fence. Oh yes - the girls were not happy being in the house all day, and they had to inspect every single square inch of the backyard to see what happened.

The dog run

Here's the view of the gazebo. The guys even put up my bird feeder. The darn thing has four huge spikes and I just can't get it driven far enough into the ground. They dug a HUGE hole and embedded it into the clay soil. I don't think that bird feeder is going anywhere. That was awesome. Thanks so much, Mike for that!!!

The bird feeder is now back in place

And here's the view looking towards the back fence.

The back fence

That's it - we're done our yard maintenance for the year. No watering, no planting (although every year I say I'm going to plant flowers, why bother with my two monsters). Yes - the deck needs to be power washed and the gazebo needs to be painted and the filter in the pond needs to be cleaned and a few weeds need to be pulled throughout the summer. But no grass to mow (no grass clippings to deal with and no allergies to go haywire), no worrying about brown grass, no excess water bill). Our front yard is the same - no grass, just mulch, and a few plants. It's the easiest and most carefree yard I've ever owned. It's also the nicest yard I've ever owned. We've lived here for almost 20 years and this didn't happen overnight. We've never had any regrets. Now if the weather will only warm up so I can sit outside!!! I had some homework to get sewn and I needed to pull some more orange fabric for my quilt. Oh god - you know how I shop at my house for fabric. Let's just say it's been a long, long time that I shopped in the orange fabric. There are two baskets - two OVERFLOWING baskets of orange. Why did I buy so much? I've no idea. Anyway - it would appear that I don't use it often so I'm trying to use more orange. And why didn't I use it? I NEED it. Nope - nothing is sacred now. Honestly, it was such a mess that I couldn't be bothered.

The stash of orange fabric

I brought both baskets out onto a CLEAN worksurface and dumped them out. Then I proceeded to "shop" and put most of the fabrics back into the baskets. Neatly of course. But nothing had to be folded - it was already folded. I don't get the refolding thing on comic board pieces. That's just way too much work. The baskets work just fine.

Two "reasonable" baskets of orange fabric

These are yardage pieces that I pulled from the baskets. Oh boy - I seem to have a wee problem here. These pieces will work for quilt backings so it'll have to be measured and a permanent home will have to be found for them. There currently isn't room on the backings shelf, but I have a temporary holding spot for extra backings and I'll put these in the same spot. It's not on the floor. As I empty a spot on that backing shelf, the pieces from this temporary storage go in the spot. It's all good.

Fabric pulled for quilt backings

 So you can see the problem. If I still have two full baskets of fabric and I pulled all this? The shelf was a mess and no wonder I only dug through the top of those baskets. Now it's going to be easy to dump them like the other colors and find what I need. This is what I pulled to continue working on my quilt. I've decided that I have enough variety of oranges that each round is going to be made with different oranges. I'm liking that. I won't make much of a dent in these but that's OK - they are now going to be used. 

Fabrics pulled for a project

I was looking through another basket of UFOs and OMG -- I found a brand new package of elastic that would be great for masks. I wonder how much I could sell that for??  Just kidding - I think I'll hang onto that one. But I also found a BRAND NEW RULER. And more thread and a couple of UFOs. Oh boy!! But that's OK. I didn't have time yesterday to sort and file all this, so that's a job for later today.

More treasures unearthed

I can only imagine what else I'm going to find as I work my way through the various bags and boxes. I spent an enormous amount of time on the phone yesterday which is why the written homework that I wanted to have done this morning isn't quite done. But that's OK. I had two test calls for the ZOOM classes that I'll be doing this morning. Both worked out just great and it's amazing how many people are using this solution to stay in touch. I've been out of the loop. I now have a year's subscription all paid for so I can talk all day if I want. It's simple to use, yet it's pretty powerful. As I find more uses for it, I know I've got more learning ahead of me. I see presentations to guilds because they don't want to have a physical meeting. Already working with one guild on that. So if you have a guild and nothing to do for May or June, let me know  - I'd be happy to put together a ZOOM trunk show for you. Or if you're a faraway guild and wouldn't want to pay my travel expenses, this is also a super way for me to talk to you!!! It won't be free - my regular fees apply. My brain just won't go to sleep these days. After one of my many conversations yesterday, a comment from an IG post, and a couple of e-mails, my brain is coming up with some other great things. Oh boy -- I may have to stop sewing to take care of the technology side of things. I love seeing the backgrounds that people use when they are on ZOOM. Mine was my messy office. ACK!!! And that's very hard to show stuff against. So - I got busy yesterday and did this. I needed to move the table in the office, but it had so much junk on it and the rubber mats under the wheels were stuck to the floor, so I had to empty the table - I just dumped the piles on the floor and moved the table. I actually have great visions of getting rid of all that stuff.

The table in the office is empty!!!!

There - you can see the entire mess. I mean it's not a total disaster. I've seen much worse. There is a LOT of floor showing even with all the stuff off the tables.

The office with an empty table in the middle

Then I hauled my three portable design walls from Studio U and set them up behind my chair.

The design wall set up behind my chair

This is what it looks like from the back and yes - the table becomes handy to hold things for the class.

Behind the design wall

 Then it was easy to put my quilt on the design wall so I could use it in the class. This is Aviatrix Medallion and my modified border.

The quilt for the class

Here's a shot of me on the computer with my new background. I thought that was very clever of me. It actually worked out really well and I could share my screen as well with the class so I used EQ8 to help with the design process. Oh yes - I'm embracing this technology and I'm going to take it to the max!!!!   I've got a couple of great plans to do a trunk show via ZOOM. Just wait for that!

My backdrop for ZOOM

As I was walking yesterday, I passed this townhouse complex. They've been redoing the roofs for a while. Holy - I bet no one thought of the extra expense in this style of roof. Not only are there tons of shingles, but they need cranes to maneuver around to install the new shingles. Something to think about when you buy a house.

That's a LOT of shingles, not on the roof

Our house has a lot of peaks and valleys on the roof. Not my choice and from time to time when I'm walking, I wonder how the roof could be redesigned to make better use of the surface to install solar panels. The way it is - it's not a very efficient roof and it's costly to reshingle. See? My brain just won't shut down - I have my Dad and my Grandfather to blame for that! I also saw this on my walk. Do you see what it is? It's an airplane!!!  We live near the flight path of a major airport and the planes are usually stacked up (well - pretty close together). There are two runways so often we'll see two planes at a time. Lately? We've hardly seen any planes.

A plane!!!!!

Since the girls were cooped up in the house yesterday, I gave them each a bone which was a mistake because Lexi likes to savor and Murphy likes to devour. So Lexi lay in this bed protecting her bone which was in front of her. Nothing like having your back to the enemy!!!!

Lexi protecting her bone

Phew -- aren't you exhausted? I am!!! OK - so I'm not. I should be because I don't seem to be getting all the sleep I should with all this excitement. After the two ZOOM classes this morning and the final editing of two more written documents, I'm off the hook for a couple of days until I need to start over for the homework that is due next Friday. Thankfully there's only one project due next week. It wouldn't have been so bad - I did have time to get it all done - it was the phone calls that delayed me. But they were so worth it so I'm not going to complain. Oh - here's a tip for you - well - you may not need it. But I edit a LOT of pictures and write a LOT of documents. If you do - then you had better have a darn good filing system on your computer. I do - now I just need to do the same with paper!!! Have a super day!!!!! Ciao!!!! Arplis - News source http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Arplis-News/~3/EA3mksQBcu8/too-much-excitement

[matesinspace]

Random Space Blob

Cruising through the galaxy to her next assignment, Firebird was on her way to Kodea, a stretch of planets that was near the Galaxy of Elves. Elduin wanted to show her something there.

She was at her peak when flying comfortably through a metal can in space.

Peace.

Quiet.

Serenity.

Whistling happily, she predicted that nothing would stop her.

A generously sloppy and wet-sounding splat interrupts her daydreaming. She screams without thinking and almost falls back in her seat.

Lo and behold! A grey-colored blob has blocked off half of her ship’s glass front window.

Eyes widening in fright, she pulled on a lever to turn on the window wipers. “What the hell is that thing!?”

To her surprise, the blob sprouted eyes.

It was no ordinary blob. It wasn’t debris either. It was... a sentient space blob.

The windshield wiper smacked it in the middle of its face, right between its eyes and into its gaping pothole of a mouth. The being started making strange, gurgling noises. No doubt about it. It wasn’t easy having a wiper dragging you across the glass by the inside of your mouth.

Was it crying? Stopping the wiper’s movements, she was shocked to see the blob shift and convulse; turning into what looked like …

a fluffy cat.

A big, fat fluffy cat.

Firebird felt her heart instantly pierced by the god of love, Cupid.

The cat looked into her eyes, large pupils drawing forth emotions like sympathy and compassion. The sentient blob knew this would work. The squealing was a common side effect among humans. Especially the long-haired ones known as “females.” He would use this to be taken inside the spaceship. Why?

He had taken a mild liking towards the facial features of this strange earthling female.

Taking off his plush face mask and feather boa, Prince Elduin Ilithor Airdan Olivan Pertoris Legolas Delmuth Gilmoir Wyn Ravador Wallaway Prince of the Third Round Table Executive Order of Arendell’s Extraterrestrial Moon Elves (5th Generation of Royals) arose from his slumber. Walking over to where FB was, he put his arms around her waist. “Aw, you’re so cute with that cat.”

Another female. The sentient space blob observed. It was taller than the red-haired earthling, so it must have stronger resolve. He must bring out the big guns in order to be taken in.

There was another creature he knew of that elicited strong reactions from earthlings.

The fat cat rolled over and turned into a seal.

A fat, fluffy seal with large puppy eyes and plentiful folds of flabby fat layers.

Firebird was going to explode with cuteness aggression. Her eyes twitched.

The seal was on its back, waving its chubby flippers helplessly in the air. It looked like it couldn’t move. It rocked back and forth, belly in the air, then gave up - opting to lay mildly on the glass windshield.

Elduin’s face was full of glee.

It let out a little cry and shivered like a wee leaf in the wind. “THAT’S IT I’M TAKING IT HOME.”

“Yes! Go rescue the lil seal pup!” Elduin cried.

With the push of a button, Firebird was in her spacesuit. She floated into the airlock above and prepared to take off towards the ball of fat.

It was starting to roll off due to its weight. Heart beating fast, she jettisoned towards it and caught the lil seal pupper in her arms. She let out a sigh of relief.

She has nice facial  features. Very symmetric. The blob thought.

As she went back into the airlock, she hugged the smol creature against her chest.

I’m in Heaven and I don’t know why … I must be in the arms of an angel. The space blob ultimately decided. I will keep her.

“CAN WE KEEP HIM?” Firebird screamed. “ACTUALLY THAT’S NOT A QUESTION. WE’RE KEEPING HIM.”

The seal rolled aimlessly on the girl’s lap and looked at the blonde female. This one was uglier than the redhead, but still quite beautiful. For some reason, this one had a deep voice, similar to a human male. The specimen also lacked mammary glands. Quite unsightly.

The space blob decided he would not keep this one.

“Hey there, wittle guy!” Elduin cooed, about to pat the seal’s head.

The seal lunged forward and bit him. “My MaNiCuRe!!!” The elven prince screamed.

“BAD!” Firebird shouted. “NO biting friends!”

Smacking the seal on its chubby behind, she yelled at it with a stern voice until it let go of the elf’s hand. It looked at her with large eyes full of what he approximated was the emotion “guilt.”

“Awh poor baby! I’ll only punish you if you’re bad!” She hugged it again and patted its furry little head. “Now I’ll go get you a snack. Let’s go into the kitchen!”

Sneaking an evil side-eye at Elduin, the seal was led by Momma Firebird into the kitchen by his flippers, where they approached the refrigerator.

Later that night, the seal slept contentedly beside whom he decided would be his mate- this earthling should consider herself lucky.

However, he most definitely did not enjoy being infantilized by her. Climbing fluffily out of bed, the seal plopped onto the floor. If he could only find photos of desirable and dominant human males, perhaps she would permit him to reproduce with her through sexual union. (They would have to fuse on a cellular level, which the blob was quite excited about. He had no idea how to do with with a non-blob organism, though.)

Ruffling its little head into the bottom of her bed, he discovered a little stash. Opening it with his seal flippers, he pulled out a magazine.

It was called “Playgirl.” On the cover was an unclothed human male posed against a wall, baring his ripped torso and chiseled musculature. The blob observed that most of the magazines featured men with large antennae that resembled mushrooms between their legs. “Hollywood’s Manliest Men - Naked!” The title read.

Opening it up, there were more scantily clad men inside. “FETISH PHOTOBOOK.”

One was dressed like a caveman, but his mushroom antenna was peeking through the loincloth. The doctor had a coat and stethoscope, but no clothes on. The “construction worker” was using his antenna, while sneezing. The blob guessed it was sneezing because his mouth was open and his eyes were closed.

Scanning each photo intently, the blob analyzed what made them attractive and put them all into his mind. Concentrating hard, he mentally projected all of these traits onto his physical form.

(He also watched the redhead’s several gigabyte collection of romantic movies - some of them had earthling mating rituals he could refer to!)

THE NEXT DAY…

Firebird woke up to a gentle sunrise. What a beautiful morning.

Her dream was that she was spooned all night by a man who looked like an amalgamation of every Hollywood actor and model ever.

Huh? Where was her seal pup?

Oh, it was under the blanket.

Curiously, a flesh-colored snake was peeking out of the bottom of the blanket. Shrugging, she pulled it open and revealed a man who looked like an amalgamation of every Hollywood actor and model ever. Sighing dreamily, she put a hand over his perfectly sculpted abs.

It was fine. She was still dreaming.

Laying her head on his perfect pectorals, she realized it felt like she was actually awake.

What!?

“So my dream was real this whole time!? But … oh my god.”

“You like this, baby?” The man said, in a tone that could only belong to an alien. He had such strange English diction! Maybe it was an exotic accent.

She looked at his (between the legs area) and it had an organ that trailed all the way to the floor and back up to the bed. “No! It’s too long and thick! GET IT AWAY FROM ME I’M A VIRGIN! And where’s my seal baby!?”

“I … am your seal baby.” He said, in his weirdly attractive alien voice. “I thought you would like it… it is the combined length and width of all the Hollywood men you like…”

“OHMYGOD!” She screamed. “Either you shrink that or turn back into a seal!”

It flipped and spasmed like a snake, and shrunk back, completely disappearing.

It was weird. It was like looking at a eunuch. She’s seen many aliens before, but this was the first time she saw a man without a … man part.

“UH.” She was exasperated. “The ideal is … seven inches? That’s fine! You don’t have to not have it! Ugh, why am I even having this conversation with you!?”

An ideal one about seven inches sprang forth from where there was previously nothing between his legs.

Elduin opened the door and gasped.

“Firebird, it’s a selkie! Get away from him!” He cried. “I KNOW of seal creatures turning into attractive human men to seduce women!”

It was time to get on the defensive. Thankfully, he saw a photo of a soldier in Firebird’s dresser drawer  yesterday on the refrigerator. He concentrated…

“Maximus!?” Firebird’s jaw dropped.

Also, he had nothing on. It couldn’t remember specifically what the soldier had on. In a panic, the blob looked at the fetish photobook, looked at “soldier”  and produced a tank top and tight camo boxers.

“My private stuff is exposed the world!” Firebird screeched. She descended on her stash like a phoenix defending her nest and put away all the magazines.

This wouldn’t do, the blob concluded. It had barely any armor.

Taking a look at Elduin who had some Elven armor on, the blob conjured that on top of his current outfit.

Firebird was in tears. “AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I CAN’T- OH! THAT VISUAL. AHAHAHA I DID NOT NEED TO SEE THAT!”

“I am ready to fight you, female with no mammary glands.” The blob deadpanned.

“Uh, for your information-” Elduin began, brandishing his bow and arrow. “I AM MALE! In fact, I am one of the manliest males in my kingdom! I AM A PRINCE! PRINCE ELDUIN ILITHOR AIRDAN OLIVAN PERTORIS LEGOLAS DELMUTH GILMOIR WYN RAVADOR WALLAWAY PRINCE OF THE THIRD ROUND TABLE EXECUTIVE ORDER OF ARENDELL’S EXTRATERRESTRIAL MOON ELVES (5TH GENERATION OF ROYALS) AND I AM THE FUTURE KING OF MY PEOPLE!”

No wonder its voice was male.

Hair, antennae, and mammary glands were no longer the gender indicator of the blob. This time,  he would listen to their vocal pitch.

Catching the elven prince’s first arrow, the thing that looked like Maximus carried Elduin princess style and tossed him into an escape pod. “Firebird, help!”

“Elduin!” She screamed, but it was too late. The prince had been sent on a course to Elfgard. Oh well, at least he’d be home faster. She sighed.

They were planning to watch “Mates In Space” together, but that would have to wait.

Time to focus on the task at hand.

Propping out her knife, she lunged at the fake Maximus and held a knife to his throat. “Who. are. You!?”

Maximus dissolved into a grey liquid before rematerializing into the amalgamation of attractive men he was before. “Please reproduce with me.”

“NO!” She cried. “I barely even know you!”

A sigh. “Here on earth, people only reproduce if … if they love each other. And spend a lot of time together, go through a lot of shit together, and-” She continued. “And commit to each other!”

She jabbed a finger onto his chest. “If you can’t give me that, then DON’T ask me for mating, you alien blob!”

In despair, the man fell down and turned back into a seal. The guilty eyes again.

“You know what … fine, I’ll let you stay.”

“I’m sorry, miss.” It said, apologetically.

She sighed. “It’s okay!” A gentle laugh followed. “I feel bad for yelling now. What can I get you from the fridge?”

“...”

“A name would be nice.”

The girl stalled for a bit and paused in thought. “What about Frey?”

The seal smiled gratefully and jumped into her arms. The end.

[bowiebwe-blog]

Bowie’s Favorite Albums Of 2017 Big List! (#20-5)

—-

20. Paramore - After Laughter

Nah guys, this is still definitely Paramore. And that’s a very good thing. I *loved* their 2013 self-titled album, and though this album doesn’t hit me at quite that level, it’s in the same ballpark(ish). They got groovier and yeah, a but pop-ier, but their heart is still definitely there. And it’s one of the most thematically cohesive albums of the year. You wanna know who I think one of their low-key influences is this time around though? Their good buddies/label mates Twenty One Pilots. I’m not so sure they would have dared take the route they did with the lyrical themes of this album without Twenty One Pilots paving the way into the mainstream first, even if Haley needed to say it. But now that it’s been said, I hope their next album goes into what comes after; hope, and all that good stuff.

*Hard Times, Forgiveness

—-

19. Liam Gallagher - As You Were

Straight up, I wasn’t expecting Liam to show up and make an album this good. I dunno how much help he had in making it happen, but here it is, it happened. This album rivals late Oasis and even his brother’s excellent post-Oasis projects. The grit here is real, and Liam backs up his incredibly large ego with some great songs. Easily one of the best rock albums of the year. Now let’s please have an Oasis reunion sometime soon as you were LG x

*Wall Of Glass, I’ve All I Need, Chinatown

——

18. Noel Gallagher’s High Flying Birds - Who Built The Moon?

Noel Gallagher is one of the very best British songwriters of all-time. I don’t ever flinch or stutter when I say that. He knows how to make a song full of heart be catchy while still pushing the boundaries of what songwriting can be, and all without overcomplication. It’s a fascinating thing to behold. Oasis was built on his back, and they were rightfully massive. And now he’s back with his wee Flyin’ Birds and making another great album. He once again shows he’s not afraid to reach out and find new avenues of songwriting, and somehow he seems to always find the sweet spot. It’s definitely once again a change of sound, and it almost makes me believe he changes it either to challenge himself or because he’s bored. Whatever the case, this is a great album with more great songwriting from an incredible artist.

*Dead In The Water, It’s A Beautiful World

—–

17. Eminem - Revival

I recently found out that Eminem used 69,000 pieces of paper during the writing of this album, so it’s no wonder to me how he came to be what I easily consider to be the greatest rapper of all-time. His golden days as off-the-wall Slim Shady might be in the past, but his undeniable passion and flow are still strong here. Eminem knows how to deliver, and pretty much everyone who knows rap knows it. He’s the greatest. And as a side note, “Arose” might easily be one of the most powerful Eminem songs ever. It’s like being the dying man fighting for his life and his mourning family at the same time, and it’s amazing to see Eminem be able to still deliver on that. Anyway, Eminem once again brought out greatness in this album. Fantastic.

*Arose, River, In Your Head

—

16. PVRIS - All We Know Of Heaven, All We Need Of Hell

I listened to both of PVRIS’ albums for the first time on the same walk, and let me tell ya, I was instantly converted into being a fan. Their songs and albums are high-quality modern rock albums with a very open feel to them. And the vocals! My goodness. They go from ice water to like having a hot Twilight vampire sink their teeth into your neck like butter. Not much changed tonally between this album and their debut, but like Royal Blood, if it ain’t broke, you don’t always need to fix it. Especially with rock. So many rock bands get so caught up in trying to become relevant electronically that they lose where they came from in the first place. PVRIS is a force to be reckoned with, even if they don’t ever get incredible commercial success (it’s just the world we live in). Great album.

*Heaven, What’s Wrong, NOLA 1

—

15. Logic - Everybody

Peace, love, and positivity! We should have all listened to Logic sooner. I decided once he released this album to listen to all of his previous albums before listening to even a single song off his new release, and folks, he’s the real deal. His flow is amazing, his beats are creative, and he’s genuine. This album definitely backs all that up. He’s one creative mother goose, and his art is full of those good vibes we love in music. He also gets more honest and personal than ever here with mental health issues (not just in “1-800…”), so it’s somewhat of an important album even just on that note.

*Hallelujah, 1-800-273-8255

—–

14. Ed Sheeran - ÷

This album was one of my most-anticipated of the year, and it largely lived up to the high expectations, but not completely. There are some songs I loved, some songs I really liked, and some songs I honestly could’ve done without on here. But here’s the thing… Ed Sheeran’s an amazing songwriter. These songs are all good. Like, even though “Shape Of You” might be one of my least favorite on the album because of that trendy finger harp bounce rythm thing I can’t stand, if you listen in the background you’ll hear very ‘Ed Sheeran-y" guitar-percussion sounds that make the song fascinating to listen to. So sometimes it seems like these songs are too polished for the radio, but it still has a lot of heart and fantastic songwriting. I don’t like it quite as much as I loved 'X’, but I still really liked this album. Mr. Sheeran is constant quality and I’m sure he’ll be a superpower for years to come.

*Happier, How Would You Feel (Paean), What Do I Know?, Perfect

——

13. Imagine Dragons - Evolve

Do you hear that? …that’s the sound of Dan Reynolds waking up. If their sophmore album was a necessarily dark album dealing with the regrets and sorrows of stardom, Imagine Dragons came around with their third album to make a bright, flying album that revolves around what comes after the dark times. It definitely feels alive and fresh, using a new coat of digital paint to make the color pop. It’s pretty close to exactly what the doctor ordered for them. And their songwriting keeps getting better (I love the flow of the last verse of “Whatever It Takes”). Imagine Dragons shows they’re not afraid to be around for the long run with this release, and it’s a joy to listen to.

*I Don’t Know Why, Walking The Wire, The Mouth Of The River

—-

12. Jason Isbell & The 400 Unit - The Nashville Sound

I love, love, love, love Jason Isbell. His songwriting to me is one form of the amazing eiptome of the human experience. Does that make sense? (…Eh, who cares.) So real. Bare. Honest. I love it. He’s back with his band this time around after a couple of solo albums that I still adore, and although this one might not be *quite* up to the level of those two for me, this is still a really, really good album. As far as folk/alt-country artists go, this guy’s a monster. Definitely worth a listen.

*Last Of My Kind, Hope The High Road, If We Were Vampires

—

11. London Grammer - Truth Is A Beautiful Thing

I remember listening to this one for the first time vividly. I was walking down a dark neighborhood street at probably 12:30 AM when “Big Picture” came on. It was like as the song progressed and the music picked up the stars started to pop out, the mountains’ dark outlines became clear, and by the time the song hit its peak I felt alive and deep in the night. The album held onto that feeling. If that makes sense. It was a great walk that night. London Grammer took seemingly forever to realease this album, to the point where I honestly stopped caring for it to come out after loving their debut album, but it blew me away when it came out. It took everything great about their first album and improved it. Subtle. Calming. Aching. Enveloping. It’s easy to dive into when the time is right. Beautiful, beautiful album.

*Big Picture, Truth Is A Beautiful Thing

—-

10. Taylor Swift - Reputation

Were you ready for it? Once T-Swift drops a new album, there’s no getting away from hearing it. And the reason for that? She makes *dang* good pop albums, even since the days when she was still “country.” She knows her craft very well (image-wise as well as musically) and has definitely deserved her wild success. I still consider “1989” to be one of the best pop albums ever (or at least in the past two decades or so), so this one had high expectations coming into it. Well, I’d say it was a success. I mean, I could do another essay on this album. No, it’s not at the level of her last album, but she once again made a solid case for her being the current queen of pop. She dives further into production trends here, but does them better than really anyone else. Her lyrics are honest and sharper than ever, but she still has those fun moments of just being Taylor Swift in there too. So beyond all the mania building up to and during the release of this album, it’s a great album by one of today’s biggest superstars.

*Delicate, End Game, Dancing With Our Hands Tied

—-

9. Aaron Watson - Vaquero

This album *feels* like Texas, and I love it. I hadn’t even heard of Aaron Watson until a few weeks ago, but I was already blown away and honestly kind of emotional by the very first chorus of the very first track (“Texas Lullaby”). It’s like I was *there*. Back down South. Big calm fields, even bigger blue skies. I don’t think there are any big radio hits on this album, but the songs are so. dang. good. Ugh! This guy is genuine and obviously has a soul full of that sweet country music. Every country music fan out there should know this album.

*Texas Lullaby, Take You Home Tonight, Run Wild Horses, Amen Amigo

—–

8. Kendrick Lamar - DAMN.

I need to watch out here, because I could easily write an essay on this album. In my opinion, Kendrick is crazy-far ahead of everyone else in the rap world concerning beats and overall production. Kendrick always pushes the limit of what a rap song can be, finding new ways of making something innovative the new hit. I’d even say he’s already the best rap artist ever in terms of making brilliant albums, and not just making them a great collection of songs. He’s always brilliant and innovative, but never at the expense of losing mass popularity and creating disconnect between he and the average listener. Along with the brilliant songs by themseleves that make up this album, the concept and vision of the album itself as a whole is brilliant (if you don’t know, look into playing the track order in reverse). I dunno, he just constantly amazes me. Every time. Kendrick’s working his way up to legend status.

*FEEL., LOVE., GOD.

—

7. Ryan Adams - Prisoner

Chances are you probably don’t know who Ryan Adams is. That’s okay. You’re not alone. It’s an epidemic. I first heard him a few years ago when he released his beautiful cover album of Taylor Swift’s 1989, and I pretty close to instantly fell in love with his music. He has a lot of heart, and he can write a heck of a song. Seems like he’s sure fighting a lot of heartache and heartbreak in this album and is learning how to move on from loss, and he tells it beautifully. I’d definitely recommend you give this one a chance.

*Doomsday, Shiver And Shake

—-

6. John Mayer - The Search For Everything

John Mayer is one of my absolute favorite songwritiers/artists. It just seems like he gets *it*. His songs seep passion and integrity, along with emotion and an abundance of amazing musicianship. He knows amazing skills and all that, but he understands heart, and that’s the core of his music. This album also seems like it has an extra dose of direct honesty in it as compared to his previous works. There are colors of hope, understanding, doubt, love, loneliness, and all else that paint what it means to be human in this album, and they’re bright and genuine here. It’s also cool to see him mix his almost-americana-ish influences of the past few years with the smooth coolness of his Continuum days. Another great one by one of the greatest songwriters/musicians of our generation.

*Emoji Of A Wave, You’re Gonna Live Forever In Me, Never On The Day You Leave

—–

5. Bleachers - Gone Now

I love this album. Straight up. One of the biggest surprises of the year, and I couldn’t be happier about it. You might not think you know Jack Antanoff (a.k.a. Bleachers), but if you’ve ever listened to any recent Taylor Swift or Lorde tracks, you do. His work as a producer is well-known (like I said, big ol’ T-Swift and Lorde tracks among others), but this is his own project from his own mouth, and it is one of my favorite albums of the year. He gets modern and experimental without sacrificing any heart from the songs, and also makes classic callbacks comparable to bands such as The Beatles (“Goodmorning”), while still managing to give them have a beautiful shiny modern polish. There’s a hidden reason T-Swift and Lorde have done so well lately. This album will tell you all about it.

*Goodmorning, I Miss Those Days, Let’s Get Married

—

[tanmath3-blog]

You will never meet a more hard-working and passionate man about his writing than Kevin J. Kennedy. He is a joy to talk to and an amazing writer and publisher. His anthologies are some of the best I have read and so amazing to see. If you have never had the opportunity to read one then you truly are missing out. Kevin J. Kennedy is pretty quiet until you get to know him then you get to see his personality and creative side burst open. He is one of the authors I would love meet and sit and talk with for hours. His living in Scotland doesn’t hurt matters either as I have always wanted to go there to visit. If you don’t know him or haven’t read any of his books this is your chance to correct that immediately and get an amazing book. Please help me welcome Kevin J. Kennedy to Roadie Notes…… 1. How old were you when you first wrote your first story?

Thirty Four. I’ve been writing for just over two years. I’ve always been an avid reader but never really thought all that much about writing, although I did always think it would be cool to have a short story in a book. Never thought I’d get round to writing one though.

2. How many books have you written?

I’ve co-written a novella called You Only Get One Shot with J.C. Michael, author of Discoredia. Other than that it’s been mainly short stories. I spent over a year, just finding anthologies with open calls and writing stories for the ones I fancied and then I decided to put my own together. Collected Christmas Horror Shorts was pretty successful so I decided to do another and ended up putting Collected Easter Horror Shorts together. I struggle with writing longer stuff as I really hate editing and the longer the story the more time I need to spend doing this. I do have another novella in the works though and I have a few co-writing projects planned. I think I enjoy the co-writing as you are only doing parts at a time and can work on other stuff while the other author does their part.

3. Anything you won’t write about?

I wouldn’t write about most extreme subjects. I have no issue with reading extreme horror but I’d prefer not to write about it. A few of my earlier stories border on the extreme but I prefer to have more fun with my stories now, rather than dealing with really dark subjects. I’m a big fan of 80s horror. I like the cheesiness of it all.

4. Tell me about you. Age (if you don’t mind answering), married, kids, do you have another job etc…

I’m 36 and I’m married with a step daughter. I work full-time, assisting people back into employment if they have been out of work for a while. I’ve worked in various jobs throughout my life, mainly as a Team Manager in call centres or a Recruitment Consultant for agencies. If I went any more into depth than that I’d send you to sleep. I’ve learned a lot of skills in previous jobs that I can apply to what I do now but my jobs have been far from interesting. I live in Scotland and always have.

5. What’s your favorite book you have written?

I guess I’d have to go for You Only Get One Shot lol. We spent a while going back and forth on this book and changing parts along the way. We were in no rush to get it finished as we were both busy with other things so that allowed us to take our time and get it right. I hope others will enjoy it. We tried to do something a little different so only time will tell.

6. Who or what inspired you to write?

I’m not sure I was inspired to write. I saw an advert for an antho called Fifty Shades of Slay. It was open for submissions and I just decided to write something and send it in. I didn’t expect it to get picked up but when it did I felt pretty good. I was going to have a story in a book. I’m one of those people who can never hold onto a feeling of achievement for very long though so decided I needed to get another story in another book and so it went on. I think I’ve had stories accepted to over 20 anthos now. Some are already out of publication while others were only released for a limited time for charity. Most are still available and doing really well in the charts. I’ve pulled back from doing the Anthos a little to try to write more of my own stuff but I do like doing the charity ones when they pop up. I think now I write because if I didn’t it would kind of feel like quitting. I’m not trying to turn it into a career so I can take a break whenever I feel like it and I have no pressure of deadlines. It does mean I will probably put out a lot less work than others though. That been said the anthos are doing well so those will continue for as long as people are enjoying them.

7. What do you like to do for fun?

Spend time with my family. It’s my favourite pass time. Any time my wife and I are free we normally just hop in the car and go away for the day. I spend a good amount of time reading and I watch a lot of movies and box sets. When you add writing and putting the anthos together I struggle for free time now.

8. Any traditions you do when you finish a book?

Putting together the two previous Anthos was a massive amount of work. I never really realized just how much work it would be when I started it. There were a few problems in the last few weeks of putting together the second book which made things ever more difficult and time-consuming. When I got to the end I had a drink. I think that’s the only thing I do. It’s weird but I don’t really feel like it’s finished until I’m holding a paperback copy in my hands. Createspace take so long to get stuff to the UK, even on their most expensive shipping rates so I need to wait for the book to go live and buy off of Amazon with everyone else, so I can get it with next day shipping. When the book comes in and looks good, I feel a sense of calm that I got there in the end.

9. Where do you write? Quite or music?

Quiet. I’m not really a big music person. I like mainly 50s n 60s rock and some 80s n 90s stuff like Oasis but I only really listen to music occasionally in the car or sometimes when having a drink.

10. Anything you would change about your writing?

Probably quite a lot. I’ve learned a lot in the last two years but I can only assume I will continue to learn as I go. I’m one of those people who are better just doing something and learning from my mistakes. I could read book after book about writing and none of it would sink in but if I make a mistake once I never forget it.

11. What is your dream? Famous writer?

I’d like to live in a wee quiet seaside town one day, maybe above a bookshop that I ran a few days a week. That’s about it. I’ve never wanted much. Just to be happy and have no money worries. Being a writer would help pay the bills but I don’t know that I’ll ever dedicate enough time for it to become my main job. You never know though….

12. Where do you live?

Central Scotland.

13. Pets?

I have two wee cats. A jet black long-haired cat called Carlito and a wee short-haired tabby called Ariel. They are 4 now. They follow me everywhere I go in the house. Who ever said cats aren’t loving and do their own thing didn’t have a clue. I can leave my spot on the couch to go into the kitchen and get a drink when they are both sound asleep, pour myself a drink and turn round and the two of them are standing behind me, looking at me as if to say What the fuck you doing Kev? We are supposed to be having nap time.

14. What’s your favorite thing about writing?

Finishing the story lol. Na, probably when I get an idea I really like and just can’t wait to get it written down.

15. What is coming next for you?

I’ve always enjoyed Carnival themed stories and movies. I decided not too long ago that I’d like to do Carnival themed antho. The idea has grown a little over the last few days but I can’t give away all the details just yet.

I’ve spoken to a few authors and the idea is to have a series of short stories and novellas that will interlink the one Carnival world. The first story will appear in my upcoming Halloween anthology. I’ll release the rest of the details as soon as they are finalized.

Anything else you would like me to include please feel free to tell me!

The most recent book I have a story featured in is ‘Tales from the Braided Pony’ released by Alucard Press, the same guys who published my first ever story. It’s western themed horror. I also recently featured in a charity anthology for a very worth-while cause. It’s called the Reverend Burdizzo’s Hymn Book. Check it out

I’ve also recently published a little short online called The Gatekeeper. It seems to be getting really great reviews. It’s only 2500 words so aimed at the Kindle Unlimited market. I’m not looking to make any money from this story so if anyone doesn’t use KU and would like a copy all they have to do is email me.

I’m due to appear in several upcoming anthologies that I subbed to quite some time ago but are only now nearing release. I’ll post about each on my various accounts. While you are waiting don’t forget to check out ‘You Only Get One Shot’

    You can connect with Kevin J. Kennedy here:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100008339824069

Website: http://www.kevinjkennedy.co.uk

Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/5452895.Kevin_J_Kennedy

Twitter: @KevinJKennedy01

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Kevin-J.-Kennedy/e/B016V0NA7M/ref=dp_byline_cont_ebooks_1

    Some of Kevin J. Kennedy’s books:

Getting personal with Kevin J. Kennedy You will never meet a more hard-working and passionate man about his writing than Kevin J. Kennedy.