#I die every few days

[incorrect-all-for-the-game]

Kevin: You’re a lying, cheating, piece of shit! You’re not the person I married!

Aaron: Fine then! We’re getting a divorce! And i’m taking the kids!

Nicky, pushing the monopoly board away from them: …maybe we should stop playing

[ghosts-and-blue-sweaters]

Please stop telling people to die. Please stop telling people to kill themselves. For the love of everything, please stop. Don’t do that.

[tei-to-tei]

December 1 - Warm Drink

[novelconcepts]

In watching more interviews with Liv about Van and the escalation of Van's pragmatism to such dark degrees, I find myself genuinely baffled that anyone could ever think Van the bad guy. I mean, I'm perplexed at finding ANY of these girls The Bad Guy. The bad guy is the situation. It's being lost. It's freezing. It's starving. It's being scraped down to the barest bone of being alive. They make choices that might be snippy, or cruel, or hard-headed, sure--Shauna refusing to just hash it out with Jackie; Jackie being too stubborn to come inside; Taissa refusing to discuss her situation plainly; etc--but by the time we reach the end of season 2, it doesn't even matter. Petty bullshit doesn't matter. Jealousy doesn't matter. Those things are still going to be present and complicated, because--for all their choices, for all the distancing they're trying to do--these kids ARE still human beings. But it isn't the point.

The point is survival. Plain, simple, straightforward. Van's pragmatism is survival. It is the difference between living another day with blood on your teeth or dying pretty. It is the difference between fighting forward through the fire and the snow and the hell of it all, and laying down to die. Van knowing, in watching the ritual violence of Shauna beating Lottie nearly the death, that they will be killing and eating one another soon. Van coming up with the cards for the hunt. Van not blinking when the moment comes, Van choosing a weapon that doubles as a tool to bring the body back, Van refusing to apologize for staying alive--it's not evil. It's not Bad Guy behavior. It's purely about survival, because there is nothing else left to her--or to any of them. They can play the pretty little Sweet Angel Girl game and die, or they can get dirty, bloody, horrific and fight. Van chooses the fight. Van chooses to fight for herself, for her lover, for her team, even knowing not everyone is going to make it out...because the alternate path there is that no one makes it out. Van knew the baby wouldn't live. Van knows the rest of them won't, either. Not unless they start making the hard choices.

And, honestly, the fact that Van sees this narrative coming. Comes up with this plan. Brings out the cards. To me, that is the opposite of Bad Behavior. That is as close to justice as anyone can find in the wilderness. If someone else came up with an idea, maybe it would have come down to voting--but that would have had such a human element to it, with bitterness or hostility or whatever ultimately petty shit always comes of humans selecting who to Other. The cards don't leave room for that. It isn't fair, because the situation isn't fair, because Man vs. Nature isn't fair, but it's as close to a just system as they could possibly find. It's the kindest solution to an unwinnable game. Not to bring it back to American Gods again, but all I can think is "it's easy, there's a trick to it: you do it, or you die." Van gave them that.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

had a human au thought of Barnaby and Wally. idk doing their taxes or going through bills together since they share a house & Barnaby going "hey we could get married for tax benefits and health insurance. wait no what if i want to marry Howdy someday? it's illegal to be married to two people." Wally goes "we could get divorced" and Barnaby gets legitimately sad like:

[chronicowboy]

things from the tsunami arc that altered my brain chemistry irrevocably and eternally:

buck's hand twisted in christopher's shirt pre-wave

you're gonna be okay, kid and the hand on buck's face

the way buck cups christopher's head when he's finally got him in his arms

and the way he clings to christopher as soon as they're up on the fire truck for the rest of the episodes, always keeping chris nestled against his side or tucked under his chin whenever he's not saving people

how he freezes when he hears christopher fall in and just Knows its chris

buck finding christopher's glasses

the fact that we see the moment buck cuts himself and he doesn't even react because he's too heartbroken to feel anything else besides the grief

do i even need to mention buck carrying himself through most of LA on willpower alone?

or the black tent?

or buck calling maddie and not even worrying about telling eddie, just worrying about christopher, until he sees him at the VA hospital?

or how eddie nods as buck stammers through his explanation like he believes that its not buck's fault even as his heart is breaking over losing his child?

or the way buck hands eddie christopher's glasses?

or he was looking for buck?

how about the way eddie presses his forehead to christopher's temple?

and the Look between buck and eddie? buck, disbelieving, relieved, just utterly and completely relieved because whatever happens next, even if he never gets to see his diaz boys again, at least christopher is alive. and eddie, disbelieving, relieved, entirely and wondrously in awe of the man that kept his son safe and alive despite a tsunami.

and buck collapsing because finally, finally his job is done. nothing else matters now.

not to mention!!! the After

wait for me to come home my beloved <3

buck's whole voiceover

the way chris walks into the loft and rests his head against buck's stomach, trusting him to wrap him in a hug, and the way buck hesitates like he's not sure he's allowed

eddie pushing in, eddie, the strong silent type, filling the silence that buck would usually to try to drown (poor choice of words, i admit) out whatever thoughts are going through buck's head as he tries to object to being left alone

eddie's instantaneous, easy switch from nonchalant teasing to serious reassuring

two men five centimetres apart because they are gay!

eddie's hand on buck's shoulder and the fucking thumb on his neck... kill me :D

eddie being honest and vulnerable about his parenting

i love him enough to never stop trying and i know you do too because of course eddie has just had more than enough evidence of that, and not just evidence but tsunami-proof evidence that buck would quite literally go to the ends of the earth for christopher, but this quote, buddie or not, links buck to christopher, to that co-parent role, indefinitely and irrefutably

eddie's little comment about buck losing weight (sir... why are you paying so much attention 🤨)

and FUCK, perhaps the worst of them all, eddie pausing in the doorway, one hand on the doorframe, eyes down as he says buck's name and that little moment of hesitation before he looks up and says thank you. for not giving up.

[bowlofr1ce]

Various Siffrin and Loop doodles today!

I am very normal about them I promise I am in control of myself.

[minhmynchi]

silly work doodle i did today hehe

to help me remember that yes loop still can only see out of one eye despite being comfortable without an eyepatch of sorts

and also to show siffrin being a lil silly. as a treat

[mimimar]

drew a few more jwqs characters as i imagine them (qijing ver)

[lunaticmeap]

See i love that SVSSS and 2ha gets compared so much, cuz they got the similar master-disciple dynamic w/ completely opposite brands of Supportive Shizun. Becuz when their students are at the brink of death, CWN goes, “I’ll die with you,” and SQQ (the absolute fucking goated millenial that he is) goes, “LFG” and calls it a day. And i think that’s just beautiful.

[strifesolution]

a friend said i'm a special kind of deranged playing stardew because i'm not "i need to micromanage every aspect of my farm and get perfect crops and harvests and optimal layout," i'm deranged in that half of every day is spent running around town talking to as many villagers as possible and giving gifts to my favorites and i have ten hearts with like seven people

do i need to drop something off at the community center and should i probably complete some mining levels and replant crops before they're out of season? yes. am i instead going to hang out in the clinic for four hours because there's unique dialogue for each villager's annual check-ups that only happen once a year, and i don't want to keep missing them? OBVIOUSLY.

[galaxygermdraws]

So fun fact this is the drawing I accidentally copy pasted on top of itself. Originally this was supposed to be a wallpaper type I would offer for Comms, but this was so complicated I would rather not do that to myself. 

In other news I am thoroughly obsessed with RTDLDX, and have beat everything except the True Arena (I have yet to 100% extra mode though, as I had like 4 lives by the final world. It kicked my butt but I do thoroughly enjoy a challenge). I have. so many thoughts. Mostly about this egg (who I am now broke because of. I have spent much money for him)

Also this is my first time properly drawing either of his boss forms I do not understand how other people do it, it was fun but gosh round shapes are hard to draw in one smooth go. Ramble aside, this is a phone wallpaper, if you wanna use it as such! That’s what its meant to be. Prolly works better as a lock screen unless you can move where your apps are

(relogs with tags/comments are appreciated. Thankyu)

[roseworth]

as a rule i know i shouldn’t trust straight cis white male internet celebrities. but if jacksfilms ever cheats on or hurts his wife i’m killing him then myself and probably 20 other people in the process. this is a threat btw you can show this post in court and use it as evidence if im ever accused of murder because i mean it

[furrysmp]

IM SO NORMAL RIGHT NOW???

[arctic-hands]

Time and distance heals things I guess. My parents got into an abusive fight with me after i took markers and pens to most of my clothes in middle school to scribble doodles and social justice messages (most prominently, Save Darfur–which really needs to be a rallying cry again given that the genocide has kicked up again as the Sudanese civil war rages). They were worried I'd look "unpresentable" in my massively oversized boy graphic tees and baggy jeans held up only by the grace of God (this was all by choice btw, i had and have always despised tight clothing and by middle school I had shunned girl clothes all together). But now at 31 I make mention of writing messages in sharpie on new t-shirts and my mom thinks it's cool and my dad offered to buy me proper fabric markers (I declined bc the cheap shirts will prolly wear out before the sharpies fade anyway). Go figure

[febuwhump]

JOIN THE FEBUWHUMP DISCORD SERVER

for clarity, the server is open and accessible all year - just the join link isn't!

the discord server is for people interested in febuwhump or planning to attempt the challenge. if you join, please go to the welcome and rules channel to get started.