#I do everything I can for people I pour everything I can into people

[scribblesofagoonerr]

— Just know you're stronger than you think

⟫ Alphabet Challenge, J - Just know you're stronger than you think

Pairings: leah williamson x teen reader

There's a been a lot of tears writing this one, but it comes from the heart.

Shoutout to @alotofpockets for being one my biggest supports when writing and dealing with my rants and emotions, massively appreciate the virtual shoulder to lean on! 💗

"Why is it that the people we care about so much are also the ones' that hurt us the most?"

That particular question has been on your mind ever since it happened, two whole days ago.

"Did something happen?" The therapist, sitting opposite you questions, her voice full of concern.

Fumbling with the strings of your Leahs' hoodie that you are wearing, you slowly nod and look at the older woman, "My mum showed up, completely unannounced."

The memories of the past few days begin to replay in your head as you remember the conversation very clearly.

"Hi sweetheart," You're shocked to open the front door and come face to face with your mother, who you haven't even heard of in a few months, following the last conversation that you had with her.

Yet here she stood, smiling like there was nothing the matter. Had she forgotten what happened?

"Mom? Wha... What are you doing here?" You're confused to say the least and you couldn't understand why she was here, at your front door, after all of this time.

"I wanted to come and see you," The woman replied, still continuing to smile condescendingly at you.

Your eyes furrowed in confusion, "And you didn't think to let me know first?" You questioned her.

"I didn't think I would need to," Your mother was quick to respond, "And besides, I tried to call, but you've been avoiding me, haven't you?" She asked, knowingly.

"I've had stuff going on," You admitted to her quietly, shrugging your shoulders.

The older woman hummed in response, "I know, you were in the hospital, and guess where I had to find that out? The news, social media-- You didn't think to call your own mother?!" She barked at you, like it was her right to know about what's been going in your life.

She didn't deserve that right, not when shes' not bothered with you for as long as you can remember.

"I guess... I guess I forgot," You mumbled, feeling ten times smaller like your mother always has a way of making you feel like that.

It  was like a flip switched right there and then, your mother's smile changed to a scowl right in front of you.

"After everything I have done for you, and you just throw it back in my face, Y/N!" The women shouted angrily, her emotions completely changing in a blink.

The therapist sat opposite you, listening to you completely as you tell her about the conversation and relayed it back to her, "Okay, and how did that make you feel? How did you handle it?" She asks.

"The same way that I always did," You murmur, still fumbling with the hoodie strings, "I blew up."

"Mum, I haven't been well-- I tried to kill myself. I wanted to die, I... I tried to end my life because I didn't want to be here anymore!" You completely poured your emotional vulnerability out to the woman, hoping that she'd comfort you, something in which you deeply craved.

The woman literally scoffed and shook her head, "And you don't think that's incredibly selfish to do? What about me-- Wha... You can't leave me, Y/N!" She exclaimed in disbelief.

Your initial confusion turned to anger very quickly, how could she make it all about herself, even now?

"Mum, I'm the one that's been suffering and in pain, this whole damn time!" You didn't mean to yell at her, but something inside you snapped.

"You don't think I have? Y/N, I've been in pain for a lot longer than you have-- You don't know the half of it!" Your mother shouted right back at you, completely forgetting the fact you were both outside in broad daylight where anyone could hear the shouting back and forth.

The very sentence made you realise how inconsiderably selfish she has always been, and she will still continue to be.

"Why has it always got to be about you? I can't even talk to you because you're so wrapped up in yourself-- See this, this is the reason I didn't tell you because yet again, you just once again go and make it about yourself!" You were seething with anger, you didn't care at this point which neighbour did hear you, "I needed you, mum, I really... I really needed you and you weren't there." Your voice was vulnerable and raw, showing the true hurt you felt right there.

"Because you didn't tell me that you needed me, Y/N," Your mother threw it back in your face, having the audacity to even tut at you, "How could I when you don't keep in touch anymore?" She asked.

You really did need your mum, but once again, she was nowhere to be seen when you did.

"She doesn't get it, she never has. Shes' always been this selfish and I've never realised..." You speak directly to your therapist, once again showing your vulnerability as the tears continue to spill down your cheeks.

Your therapist nods and continues to listen, shifting the paper in her hands completely aside, "Did you tell her how you felt?" She wonders.

"I did," You nod in response, "It was hard, but... I did it."

"I deserve to know if theres' something wrong with you, Y/N,'' Your mother stated, like it was her god-given right to know.

Was it really?

"I'm telling you now, aren't I, mum?" You responded, quietly.

Your mother exhaled a sigh and shook her head, "Were you alone in the hospital?" She questioned.

"No, I had Leah--" You were cut off before you could finish that sentence.

Your mother had the audacity to scoff, "Leah is not your mother, Y/N. I am!" She stated, firmly.

"Yeah, well shes' been there a lot more than you have in the last few years!" You confessed your inner thoughts, you were damn right about that statement.

Leahs' been there a lot more than your mum ever has been.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Your mother questioned in disbelief.

"It means... It means I'm done, mum. I'm done with always having to be second best-- I'm done with you and your selfishness! I'm just... I'm done now!" You told her, not having the energy to keep up this argument with her as you deflated your shoulders.

Your mother had the nerve to look at you hurt and it made you feel instant guilt about what you said, "All that I have done for you, and this is how I am treated? By my own daughter!" She said quietly, barely louder than a whisper.

"Mum, I'm sorry... But I can't, I can't do this anymore," Your telling her nothing but the truth, your tired of the bickering, your so tired of it and its' draining you both mentally and physically, "I love you because your my mum, but I'm done, I can't... I think its' best that you go."

"I'm the one whos' always been there, Y/N. I am the one... I am the one whos' been there when that deadbeat of a father walked out on us. He walked and I stayed, I didn't have too. I could have given you up but I stayed and this is what I get?" Your mothers' words hurt, they're gaslighting and manipulative, but you know this is exactly what she is like.

You have to try and remain strong in this decision.

"I think you should go now, mum. I... I don't want you here anymore," You told her, quietly as you avoided looking at her, "Please, just go."

"Y/N, you can't just push me away. I don't deserve to be treated like this," The women continued to gaslight you, showing the toxic traits of her personality.

Shaking your head, you remained firm on your decision, "It's always the same thing with you, mum. Just... Just fuckin' go!" You exclaimed, trying to keep your tears at bay until she left.

You watched as your mothers' face turned to look like complete thunder, "Don't you swear  at me, young lady!" She shouted, enraged.

This time, you couldn't help but scoff, "Please, you can't tell me what to do. Just leave and never come back!" You demanded.

"Y/N," Your mother pleaded, but you didn't want to hear it.

Your therapist leant forward to pass you the box of tissues and looked at you in great sympathy, "And then what happened?" She asks.

"Leah showed up," You tell her, giving her a brief smile while trying to harshly wipe the tears away.

"I think you should do what she says. She's asked you to leave and you're not welcome here," Leah appeared behind your mother, coming back from a quick trip to the shops to pick up some much needed essentials and was shocked to see the women on her doorstep after all this time.

"You!" Your Mother turned round to see the voice behind her as she glared, "You've poisined my own daughter against me!"

"Me?" Leah scoffed in response before she shook her head, "That wasn't me, I think you'll find that was all done by you. So you can see Y/N is upset, so please Y/M/N, just go because like I said before, you're not welcome here." Her words were firm and it made you smile slightly with the way that the blonde fought in your corner.

"So, she left?" Your therapist questions, curiously.

You nod in agreement and use your sleeves to wipe your face, "She left, I felt... I guess I felt relieved, free almost? I... I just wish that things could be different, you know?" You tell her, confused about the feelings you have.

Your therapist smiled at you sympathetically, "You don't deserve to be treated like this, Y/N. Even if its' your own mother and you did the right thing here-- Remember we talked about healthy boundaries? Those apply to family members as well." She tells you.

"I know, it just hurts," You murmur, feeling complete exhaustion after spilling everything out in the open.

"It will for a bit, but then it'll heal. This is about you, Y/N," Your therapist continues to speak open and honestly to you, "It will take time to heal, but you're strong enough to do it, and you're not alone either." She states, kindly.

"Rough session?" Leah questions in concern as she glances at you beside where she sits in the driver's seat.

You must be somewhat predictable, or she can tell from the red puffy eyes and tear stain cheeks.

It may just be the latter one.

"Yeah," You murmur in response, you barely have the effort to even want to vocually communicate right now.

Leah continues to look at you in further concern, "Do you want to talk about it?" She offers.

"No, I don't... I don't want to talk about it," Your quick enough to disagree with that.

That was a complete lie, you did want to talk about it. Even if you won't admit it though.

"Okay, that's fine. You know where I am though if you need me, bubs." Leah sends you a gentle smile and squeezes your knee to let you know she's here for you.

"Thanks," You lean your head on the window, watching the passing traffic as you head back home to the flat you shared with the blonde.

The rest of the ride home was quiet, you felt so in your head right now.

Therapy was meant to help, right? Why did it feel like the complete opposite, right now.

"I'm gonna make tea, what do you--" Leahs' words are cut short with the sound of your bedroom door slamming shut behind you, "I'll be out here if you need me at all." She calls out, hoping that you can hear her.

You do hear her, but you just don't have the energy to verbally respond right now.

You used it all in therapy, pouring your emotions out and showing your vulnerability, and that's something which rarely ever happens.

You keep yourself shut away in your bedroom for the rest of the day.

Leah of course has tried to prise you out of your room, but you are very much reluctant to leave your confined space.

You don't want to talk anymore today, you'd already done enough of that with the therapist.

So instead you bury yourself in a blanket, shamelessly clutching hold of the little stuffed green dinosaur that you won at a fair when you were eight, while you just sob endlessly into your pillow.

"Why is it that the people we care about so much are also the ones' that hurt us the most?" The question still plays on your head in a loop, because even now, you still don't understand the answer to it.

What shocks you the most is the fact that your mum hasn't bothered even once to contact you.

That shit hurts, to realise that shes' not bothered about any of it.

Not a single thing.

Somehow during the time you've spent in your room, you end up crying most of the time. Unfortunately, the habits' become more familiar over the last few months than you realise, all because of that woman.

There's a knock at your door, followed by the blondes' voice, "Bubs?"

"G' way," You mumble from underneath the covers, trying to block out the rest of the world.

Hearing the door creep open, you know that Leah isn't going to do that, "I heard you crying. I'm not going to leave you when you're this upset." She states, firmly.

"I don't want... I don't want to talk," You stutter your words, trying to control your sobs no matter how difficult that is.

"That's okay, we don't have to talk about things," Leah moves further into the room as her heart breaks at the sight of you curled up into a ball in the middle of your bed, clutching a hold of the pillow with tear stained cheeks, "Oh, bubs. C'mere, my girl."

That sight was enough for Leah to swiftly move to lie behind you in your bed, gently scoop you up and pull you closer to her, to be able to allow you the comfort even if you didn't want it.

The blonde knew different, she knew not to believe you when you said you didn't want to talk, she allows you the space but shes' not going to allow you to be completely torn up about this.

"Le," Your voice trembles, you don't have the words to say right now, but your grateful for the blonde being there.

Leah quietly shushes you and wraps her free arm around you, "I know, I know it hurts. You don't have to say anything, but know I'm here for you, regardless."

"Why... I don't get why, why does it hurt this much?" You're completely heartbroken, you thought pushing your mother away would help with things, but it makes it all that worse.

"I wish I could tell you the answer there, bubs," Leah murmurs and rocks you back and forth slightly in her arms, "Sometimes' it hurts to do it, but it's' for the best, you know?"

"S... She hasn't even phoned me. She doesn't care about me," You cry openly, showing the raw vulnerability you felt about this situation.

You feel like you've been abandoned, somewhat.

Parents aren't meant to do that, but yet its' easy for enough for it to happen.

And now you're the one in the wrong? It doesn't make sense.

"It hurts now, but things will get better," Leah tells you honestly, running her slender fingers through the strands of your own hair, "And I promise to never leave you alone, ever, okay? You've always got me!" She promises.

"You... You've always been more like a mum to me, more than my mother ever has," You admit to her through small sobs, shuffling around to be face to face with her as you move to rest your head on her chest, "Thank you for never giving up on me or leaving."

Leahs' heart cracks just that little bit more as she smiles sympathetically, "Your my kid, regardless of blood or not, and I love you so so much," She speaks from the heart, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of your head, "The day I met you, it felt like one of the best days of my life and I feel so grateful to be a part of your life, kid."

"I'm grateful you're a part of my life too, Le," You murmur quietly, your voice is hoarse from how much you've been crying but you really do mean what you say, "I wish you were my mum instead, you wouldn't abandon me like she did." You admit, your voice is still no louder than a whisper so you're not sure if shes' even heard it.

"I'd love to be your mum as well bubs, you deserve so much better," Leahs' response is nothing but the honest truth.

Your eyes start to flutter shut, "I really wish it could happen." 

Somehow you feel closer to falling asleep, you don't know what it is but you feel that with the presence of Leah there with you, it's a lot easier to fall asleep.

"I'll make it happen," Leah whispers, still running her slender fingers through your hair gently, "Get some sleep, yeah? It's been a long day."

There wasn't any response from you as you'd somehow managed to fall asleep in that short space of time.

"Bubs," Leah peers her head over slightly to see you fast asleep and she can't help but chuckle fondly, "I mean it when I say it and I'll keep that promise, kid. You're never going to be alone again." She states, firmly.

The blondes' heart aches so much for all the crap that you have had to put up with through the years and now she'll do anything to make it better.

"Sleep well, bubs. I love you," Leah whispers, pressing a gentle kiss on the top of your forehead as she pulls you closer towards her, allowing you to sleep practically on top of her, allowing her to lie there and think through things with the determination of a way for you to finally be happy.

© scribblesofagoonerr

[soapskneebrace]

There has been more than enough drama about this whole situation so I will be as direct and concise as I can. This will be my last post about the matter regarding Myka/codslut. This will likely be my last post on this blog period.

This fandom community has crucified me over a story that has fallen apart over what I can only describe as the lightest scrutiny. FOIA requests, when expedited, have a ten day window to be granted, not a twelve hour window, and normally take months to even years to grant. Americans do not call small towns villages. Crisis workers do not have unfettered, immediate access to clients' personal information, let alone that of complete strangers on the internet.

I am not exaggerating when I say I have feared for my safety for the past week. The three people who have lead the charge against me have slandered, harassed, and outright stalked me—keeping track of posts I've made and deleted, changes I've made to my directory, and even the time between posts I have made. I have genuinely feared that the next step these people were going to take would be to search both of my blogs (because I have not, in the past, been very concerned about hiding my main) for my personal information in order to dox me.

I believe this campaign has been racist ("gaz erasure my ass") and ableist in nature. I believe my being autistic—and my trouble communicating in a way that could satisfy the aforementioned people this entire week—has played a part in the way this fandom has victimized me.

I believe in particular that sheheal has a personal vendetta against me, although I do not know why. I believe that their claim that they must leave their blog up as "evidence" is false—I believe they are keeping it active in order that it should always be digitally connected to me, and thus risk my safety and peace in whatever online space I choose to be in next. I am entertaining the belief that she even intends for it to follow me in real life, although that may be more paranoia than possibility.

I am aware of the mistakes I have made. I regret them. I am sorry for them. If what has happened to me is representative of what happened to Myka, I have nothing but empathy for her. Even before this happened, I would not wish this on anyone. I do not believe that dogpiling is justice, and have fought against it when I have seen it happening in this fandom in the past. I did not and do not want this to happen to anyone, ever, no matter their sins.

I want to extend a gratitude I find difficult to express the depth of to everyone who reached out to check on me. I especially want to thank Early for being the first person to stick their neck out for me, and for everything after. I hope to be friends with you all for a long time. You mean more to me than you know. You have made a lonely and difficult week feel less lonely and difficult.

I do not want to be a part of this fandom anymore. I have poured over a year and a half of work and creative energy into this community and it has meant nothing. I have loved this community and it has meant nothing. I have fought for this community and it has meant nothing.

If fandom was ever a safe space, it is not anymore. It is not safe for those affected by racism and it is not safe for those affected by disability. It is not safe for anyone who makes mistakes. It is not safe for me, and reader, it is not safe for you. I did not think this would happen to me. Do not make the mistake of thinking this won't happen to you.

[bluedew]

into the spiderverse! (a.k.a your future)

personally, a lot of things have been happening in my life. like, a LOT. and i know a lot of us feel nervous about the future, so i hope this can bring a little peace to you guys. if it resonates, let me know so i can keep doing more, and if it doesn't, also let me know!

this is timeless, it's intended to overview the next coming month(s).

*: .｡.o .｡.:*☆🕸️🕷️

PILE1.

i think you're in the process of letting something go. i feel like you're blooming this month; you may feel like everything's falling apart, you don't know what to do, where to go, how you're gonna get through; but you're doing that now, aren't you? getting through. and throughout it all you're lifting everyone up. to other people you sound like the beginning of that song "girl with the tattoo" by miguel. and soon, in reward of your patience and love, life's gonna start sounding like it to. you're persistent in your efforts to get through shit, and you simply ARE the shit. this month you're gonna get things DONE. you're gonna get a glow-up in some way, all because of your own hard work. know that people are proud of you. you're doing a good job. keep your head up.

PILE2.

i think you feel like nothings happening in your life. but yk what? you're gonna be chilling and living life and suddenly BAM. something's gonna happen!! you're gonna be like WHAAA. it'll be a pleasant surprise, something you're not expecting. but unlike pile 1, you're afraid of putting in a lil energy to get goodness because you're scared of it not being actually good, or you think you'll regret it. but pile 2? you're never gonna know until you do it. DO IT!! that's the message. you have to let go of your fear of seeming too needy, too greedy, too hungry for the world. the world is yours. you're a very timid person but right now you have to step up. take the world, SHOCK it. you have the potential to do so, but if you sit waiting for the world to shock you first it's not gonna happen.

PILE3.

the upcoming future is for you to rest. you're my pile that works hard, and you give and give until there's nothing left of you. you're a walking hollow shell. but you have to relax and pour love into yourself, and let love be poured into you. you're afraid of vulnerability, i get that. so am i. but flowers will never bloom unless they let the water seep into their roots. vulnerability is beauty; the truth is that people who want to hurt you will come and uproot you anyways. but you can't keep letting your fear of bad people prevent both good and bad people from coming into your life. the jealous people in your life want to steal your glow; you probably have a strong aura. don't dim to fit in, or to keep your dreams small with everyone's. your expectations set your reality.

[ellsss]

SEVIKA X BROTHEL F! READER FANFIC 18+ PART 2:

authors note: this took SOO long because ✨executive dysfunction✨ I'm honestly really proud of this, even though it took forever. I think I've done a good job. Read Part 1 first, if you haven't already! If you've read that please proceed, and enjoy!!

PART 2 SUMMARY: It’s your first day at The Gardens, and a terrifying customer awaits you…

warnings: mdni! soft! sevika, protective! sevika, body worship, themes of body dysmorphia.

word count: 3.1k

“Strip”, she demands suddenly, her grin getting bigger by the minute. You gasp at the instruction and your eyes widen in shock. You hate this and stripping is the last thing you want to do.

“Right now?”, you ask, moving your arms to your sides and hesitantly picking at the fabric of your corset above your hips. She looks at you, brows furrowed, her head leaning slightly in disbelief, and you know that you have no choice in the matter.

You look down at yourself and cringe at your appearance. You’ve never shown this much of yourself before. The only person who had seen your body was your ex and she wasn’t exactly nice about it.

You knew that stripping was part of the job when you took it, but you underestimated how intense it was going to feel.

Your cleavage on full display, bursting through your corset, the lacy ensemble hugging your figure, and your panties squeezing your thighs, your stretch marks peeking through ever so slightly.

This is the most exposed you’ve been in a while, and you don’t like it. Your insecurities bubble inside of you...

Your chest tenses up, feeling the pressure of her demand weighing heavy on your shoulders. You squeeze your eyes shut, cheeks pushed up towards your eyelids, hands clenched into tight fists of distress.

At this point, you’re doing anything to escape this situation. You try to clear your mind, to do something to forget about your surroundings. But all you can focus on is the panic you feel about being watched; being seen.

“Is everything alright, doll?”. A voice, peppered with concern, reaches your ears, but it’s too muffled for you to hear anything. The critical voice in your head rings too loud.

Your heart begins to pump out of your chest, and it gets harder and harder to breathe as your chest tightens, your breathing becoming sharp and fast, blood passing through your ears.

Pulling at the ends of your corset, you feel yourself unravelling, like you're about to cry, your head spinning as you see the images of the room in your mind swirling around you. You're welling up now, tears filling your eyes up to the brim and eventually pouring out like a boiling pot.

You try to calm yourself down and breathe but as your heart thumps faster and harder, your breathing becomes more and more shallow, and loud enough for people to hear you.

You don't want to be here. Anywhere but here. You wish you hadn't come in the first place. You just wanted to hide; and for someone to pull you out of this dreaded dreamscape that became your reality.....

"Hey!". Your eyes widen at the sound of that firm, yet calming voice, tears falling down your cheeks, your gaze fixed on the ground.

"Look at me"... You continue to stare at the floor, afraid to face to consequences of your emotional display.

"Look. At. Me".

The voice is much firmer. Her tone is rough... blunt, but there's an underlying softness shimmering underneath. Although with authority roughened around the edges, the fine line is sincerity above all.

There's no place to run this time, shrink yourself further or put a cloth over yourself to hide in security. You couldn't resist caving in under her spell and lifting your head up.

You slowly look up, and you're met with a stone-cold expression painted across her face, except for a tiny glint of concern showing up in her eyes.

"Breathe", she says. "Can you breathe for me?".

You nod, eyes widened and still in shock as you stare at her.

You look deeper into her eyes, relaxing yours after a while, and you try your very best to control your breathing, taking short, shallow breaths, slowly letting them become smooth and prolonged. You start to feel more relaxed.

Her eyes don't leave yours the entire time. It weirdly makes you feel better, knowing that she's there to calm you in your obvious time of need. You're able to calm your thoughts now, only focusing on her frosted pupils.

You look at her as if to ask for further instruction.

"Come here", she states, beckoning you over to her. You walk on over, timidly clasping your hands together, trembling with every step; and you end up very close to her, stood in between her legs, looking down at her in front of you.

"Straddle me"...

You gasp a little at her words.

Straddle her? How could you, after how embarrassed you are about this? About panicking this much in front of her?

And you haven't been that close to anybody in a very long time. That's why you panicked in the first place; it's been so long since you've been so open with someone regarding your body, and the last time didn't go too well. Your heart starts to beat again at the thought of being so close to her.

You swallow. "Uh, okay", you mutter. Eventually, you proceed.

Nervous, you put your hands on her shoulders, using her as leverage, and you lift each leg over hers, carefully sitting on her lap.

Nothing but goosebumps cover your whole body as you feel how sturdy her thighs are underneath your plump and fleshy ones. You felt the veins of her thighs and the firmness against your skin, her muscles flexing slightly. You feel your cheeks heating up at how strong she feels.

As you look into her eyes, her muscular yet soft hand travel slowly down your back, towards the side of your hip and onto your ass.

She looks at you completely deadpan, that concerned glint still in her eye, and she brings her metal hand up to rest on your cheekbone. The cold sensation of her metallic fingers sends a shiver down your spine...

"You want to tell me what that was about?", she asks, again quite sternly but with a kindness hidden in her tone.

"Uh....".

That question terrifies you. You haven't really talked to anyone about the insecurities surrounding your body, let alone how people have treated you for it. You've been bullied by others because of it your whole life; even one of the girls made fun of you today....

Telling anyone, especially Sevika, felt humiliating. She looks at you, patiently waiting for your answer.

"I... uh... I can't", you say in defeat, shaking your head towards the floor. You want to respond but you can't; you're just too scared.

She gently pulls your chin back to meet her eyes again, forcing you to answer. "Try".

Your eyes light up hearing her say that. Knowing that she wants to listen warms your heart in ways that you cannot explain.

No one has ever cared to ask how you feel besides your parents, and you'd never really made friends with people who genuinely appreciated you. Your ex? A whole different story. Having Sevika of all people want to hear you out, was nice.

"Well... okay. If you're open to listening", you reply, softly. She nods as a way of telling you to proceed, her fingers gently circling the sides of your hips.

"People... aren't really nice to me... well because I...because i'm fat". She raises her eyebrows.

"And, I'm just insecure about my body because of it. I just feel so ugly. That's why I got so scared when you asked me to.... you know..".

She looks at you and nods in understanding. "Hmm"... She thinks about what to say for a second.

"Well, fat doesn't mean ugly". She then scans your body, top to bottom. "And you're definitely not ugly". Sevika squeezes your ass, laughing slightly through a mischievous smirk, a danger in her eyes shining through.

Your cheeks warm up again at her words, a smile creeping up on your face.

"Really?", you ask...

"Fuck yeah". She looks at you, scanning you for the second time, drinking every inch of you in. "Pretty eyes, cute smile". Her metal thumb brushes gently against your chin. Your smile grows bigger as you hear her shower you with compliments.

"And your body? You got nothing to worry about, trust me". But then Sevika says this, and your smile slowly dissipates. You shake your head.

"You don't have to lie to me". You look back down to the floor again, tears starting to well up in your eyes. Back to square one.

Sevika, concerned, looks back at you. She exhales in defiance, unwilling to accept your negative self-talk, and places her hands firmly on your hips.

"Stand up", she commands, much to your surprise. You do as she says and stand in front of her, bewildered by the instruction, but still willing to follow through anyway.

She gets up out of her seat, turning you to face away from her, bringing her hands to touch you and lightly grab your waist. Slowly, she guides your body towards the mirror beside the couch, and she makes you do the most difficult thing you'd have to do in this interaction so far.

Face yourself.

Instinctively, you look away, head toward your shoulder, not wanting to see the flaws that are so obvious to you.

"Hey, look at yourself for me". Your head stays put.

"Look at yourself for me", she repeats emphatically, smirking away at you. Reluctantly, you look up and see yourself in the mirror....

There you are in your entirety. Eyes wide, cheeks full, lips parted slightly. Broad shoulders slanting on either side, the top half of your corset, hugging your breasts as your cleavage spills over; and the bottom revealing your rounded figure, your hips peering out below the high waisted panties you're wearing.

You notice your legs and the pudginess of your thighs; the way they lean into your knees and back out to your calves. Every part of your body, while you're cringing as you're looking at it, feels so cohesive. Like each part meshes wonderfully together.

"See? You got nothing to worry about", Sevika states, her hands delicately holding you in place. "Your body is beautiful. You're absolutely beautiful..."

Initially, you were staring at yourself with waves of uneasiness filling your insides, thoughts of how disgusting your body is to you, but the more you look, the more you think about how Sevika feels about you; the more you're finding things that you actually like about your body.

Like you've always loved how round your cheeks were, it made you look sweet...kind. And no matter how bad people made you feel for it, you didn't mind how wide and pointed your hips were; they made you feel beautiful sometimes; almost sexy?

Looking at your body like this, taking it all in, while scary at first, gradually started to feel better.

"Thank you.... Y-you've made me feel better, especially on my first day". You turn away from the mirror and look at her, shooting her a look of gratitude and holding her hands in front of you.

"Not a problem, princess". The 'scary lady' smiles, and walks you back to the couch, sitting back down with her legs spread. She slaps her thigh, twice, inviting you to sit on her lap.

And so, you do, confidently this time.

"So... how was your first day? Enjoy yourself?". Sevika chuckles and smiles to herself at her question, looking at you, securing your waist in her hand. "You know, besides the panic attack that I caused".

You both laugh heartily, yours coming out as a giggle rather than a chuckle as big as her own.

"Besides that, it was mostly nice. I'm glad I had you as my first customer; you make me feel...". You pause, trying to find the words. "You've made me feel worth it".

Sevika looks pleased hearing you say that. As much as she loves to go to the brothel to make herself feel good, after a long day's work; making the workers feel good has always been just as important to her.

"Good". She takes your chin in her hand and smooths her thumb over your soft lips. "I hope that panic attack was the only bad thing about your day".

"I wish", you mutter. Your eyes shift to the floor and Sevika scrunches her brow, surprised at your confession.

"Hmm? What happened to make you say that?", she enquires. You take a breath, getting ready to explain the other downsides of your day. You're not looking forward to this, but she's made you feel comfortable enough to express yourself.

"When I arrived, these girls... they started laughing at me. Laughing at what I looked like. I overheard one of them call me a name". You take a look at Sevika's face, and that unnerving scowl is back; and this time, the danger in her eyes has no flirty connotations.

"Show me". She demands. You furrow your brows, confused as to what she's asking you to do. But then it hits you, and you stand up and step towards that maroon-coloured curtain, bringing her with you.

You pull back the curtain and bring Sevika's attention to three women entertaining a customer in the room opposite yours, their drapery opened enough to see them.

A busty brunette with an hourglass figure, a rambunctious red head, blue eyes gleaming at whoever's in front of her, her loud cackle filling the room, and the queen bee, right in the middle.

Blonde , thin as a twig, batting her bright green eyes at the customer, flirting mercilessly with him. Her hair is slicked back into a ponytail, accentuating the height of her cheekbones, her lips pursed above her perfectly crafted jawline. You point at her tentatively whilst she seduces her prey.

"She's the one who called me a name", you announce, disapproval in your tone. Suddenly, you see her turn her head and catch your eye, and she smiles slyly at seeing you watch her. You immediately shut the curtain and turn your back towards them.

Sevika reflects on how triumphant she looked when she was talking. From her smile, all the way to her body language. The way she was sitting up straight, how she was playing with her hair, twirling the ends of it, the daggers in her eyes.

There was an arrogance to it; as if she thought she was above everyone else.

"She thinks she's the shit, huh?". Her distaste is crystal clear in her voice. You nod profusely in response.

"Haha... yep". You fold your arms, trying to shield yourself as you think about how that girl treated you.

Sevika glares towards the curtain in front of you both, seething at the thought of someone treating you that way. Then a sly smile of her own is plastered across her face. An idea she was definitely planning on following through with, filled her brain.

"Why don't we give her something to look at? Make her jealous." She nudges you gently, her head tilted, waiting for your answer.

"Ah... I don't know", you say apprehensively. You look at the curtain, and then back at her. You see her face, and she looks like she's trying hard to convince you.

It would be fun, you think to yourself, picturing that smug look on that girl's face disappear as you carry out whatever plan Sevika has concocted.

You close your eyes for a few seconds and open them back up with a newfound fire inside them.

"Okay!", you exclaim. "So, what's the plan?". Sevika seizes your hand and drags you outside of the room you were in, and takes a strong hold of your waist, both hands against your hips. In the corner of your eye, you see the queen bee look over to where you're standing.

Sevika leans over your shoulder, her mouth pressed up against your ear, the sensation of her lips brushing against it. "Can I kiss you?", she whispers.

Your breath hitches as your heart begins to fill with excitement. You accept the offer with a quick but soft nod of your head.

She takes your face in her hand and presses her lips against yours, feeling the warmth of your lips against hers. You kiss her back, cautious at first, unsure of what to do; but then you relax into it, and pull her into an embrace as her soft lips make yours tingle, lips brushing together; her breath tickling your nose.

She slowly pulls her lips away, leaving you with a proud look across her face, a large differentiation in yours. You look at her, dazed, stunned, disoriented.

"Wow..", you say. "That was...."

"Good?", she asks, laughing as she puts her hands on her hips.

"Yes, definitely". You giggle, putting your hand over your mouth bashfully. Sevika looks to see if "Blondie" noticed how well you were getting along, and it was safe to say she did. You turn to see for yourself, and that pompous look on her face went straight into a displeased frown in a matter of seconds.

Your giggle becomes a hearty laugh as your attention shifts back to Sevika. "I think we definitely made her jealous".

"I think that's fair to say, doll", she retorts, gently nudging you again. Sevika then clutches you tightly into her arms, surprising you and lifting you off your feet a little.

"Wait here for me". Then she releases you, going back into the private room you were in.

You wait there, hardly able to contain your excitement, fiddling with your hands and grinning up to your ears. Your heart racing, your mind thinking of all the things she could be doing, imagining what she thinks about you.

You've just met, but you can't help it. The amount of feelings that you have felt just from meeting her has already changed your life for the better. You hope that she'll come around and change it for the better again.

She pulls the curtain back and brings a large pouch, filled with money for your services. You almost forgot this was your job, until you saw that.

"I gotta pay you sometime, right?", she jokes. You smile, taking the money from her hands.

"Thank you, Sevika". You sway from side to side as you hold the pouch in your hands. "I hope you'll come around again?". You wait in anticipation, silently pleading for her to say what you want to hear. That she'll be back.

"Definitely". She leans down with her hand on your back, and places a kiss on your cheek, grinning in your direction.

"Goodbye now". She finally turns away, and before you can reply, confidently walking towards the exit.

You watch her in awe, wishing you could have said goodbye in your own little way, full of hope for your next interaction at The Gardens....

taglist: @archangeldyke-all @yer-boiiii @myrkkymato @abitohoney @abitohoney-fics @xthescarletbitch @sevikaspillowprincess @sevikasenby

[kingkatsuki]

Here’s yet another thirst post that got out of hand. I received this ask yesterday about Hiragi teaching an inexperienced Kaji how to fuck, but it got me thinking. What if Hiragi was a little meaner?

Kaji needs a little help being meaner to you in the bedroom, and there’s no one else he’d rather ask than Hiragi.

Pairing: Kaji Ren x Hiragi Toma x f!reader.

Warnings: 18+, threesome, bratty reader, brat tamer!Hiragi, dirty talk, degredation, praise, spanking, biting/marking, blowjobs, spit, choking, multiple orgasms, creampies (Hiragi fucks Kaji’s cum into us), dry humping, minimal aftercare.

Word Count: 5.6k.

“I don’t really know if this is something I can help ya with this time, Kaji.” Hiragi fiddled with a sugar packet on the table in Pothos and settled in the corner of the cafe as his friend leaned across the table.

“Why?” Kaji scrunched his nose.

Hiragi always knew what to do, he knew everything. It’s why when Kaji had thought about the topic Hiragi had been the first person that he thought about. The only person, aside from a moment of weakness when he thought about asking Kiryu — although it would’ve been far too embarrassing to ask one of his Kohai or even Umemiya — but even Kaji knew how much of a disaster that would be.

“It’s private, no?” Hiragi continued, almost laughing to himself at the fact that Kaji had asked to meet him here for this. It seemed wholly out of character for his friend, and perhaps it was proof of just how deeply Kaji felt for you, “Have you tried watching porn?”

“It’s not the same,” Kaji shook his head, trying to shake off the awkwardness bubbling in his stomach as his cheeks tinged pink, “That shows you angles, or positions— but I want to make her cum.”

“So you’ve never made her cum before?” Hiragi felt a wave of perversion come over him at asking such a blase question, but he found himself leaning forward in his seat as he waited with bated breath for the answer.

“Of course I’ve made her cum,” Kaji almost snarled, his fist coming down against the table in frustration.

He immediately buried his chin in the hem of his grey hoodie in embarrassment as the loud bang sounded in the small cafe. Hiragi sat back to wave at Kotoha from her position behind the counter in apology, a kind smile on his face before turning back to Kaji.

“I can make her cum, that’s not the problem.”

He couldn’t believe the fact that he was sitting in Pothos of all places on a Wednesday night having this conversation with Kaji. Not that there was anything wrong with the cafe, he more than enjoyed the occasional cup of coffee there– and the omelette rice truly was the best in the area. But this kind of conversation was surely better suited for somewhere else.

“So then what is?” Hiragi took a sip of his coffee.

“I don’t really know how I do it,” The tips of Kaji’s ears turned crimson, as he fought the urge to pull his headphones up over his head, “She just sorta– does.”

“Why not try asking what she likes?”

“She wants him to be more assertive in the bedroom.” Kaji replied bluntly, “To make her cum more than once— to take control.”

“She wants you to dominate her?” Hiragi sounded the words on his tongue with a raised brow.

“Yeah.” He nods, “But she doesn’t listen.”

Hiragi shook his head as he took a sip of his coffee, of course Kaji would find himself a brat to tame.

“I didn’t think you of all people would have a problem with being ‘too nice’, Kaji.”

“Yeah, well she seems to think I am.” He shrugged nonchalantly.

“I mean, have you talked to her about this?” Hiragi almost choked on the warm liquid as it poured down his throat, cheeks dusted pink.

“No, but—”

“So maybe that should be your first step,” Hiragi smiled, “Communication is key to a solid relationship.”

“Communication isn’t the problem.” Kaji shook his head, tugging a sucker out from his jeans pocket as he felt the annoyance begin to build inside him, “It’s difficult trying to keep control when I don’t want to lose my cool.”

“But you managed that well when you were in Bofurin,” Hiragi smiled, “Call it transferable skills.”

“Nah, you don’t get it—” Kaji deadpanned, “She makes it difficult to think.”

“It can’t be that bad.”

“You know everything Hiragi,” He continued to talk, palms slayed flat against the table as his glass of water with a straw lay untouched, “You’re the only person I trust enough to help with this.”

“Okay, fine.” He sighed, leaning back in his chair, “I’ll help you.”

Admittedly, Hiragi would do a lot of things for Kaji whenever he needed his help, but he would never have expected to be aiding him with something like this.

And what made it even worse was the fact that Hiragi hadn’t counted on you looking quite so perfect beneath him. Sprawled out against Kaji’s comforter, head propped up on plush pillows as you obediently waited for his instruction. The compliance alone had his cock twitching uncomfortably against his pelvis, desperate to be freed as you stared at both men with pleading eyes. Completely naked in front of their hungry gazes while Kaji sat beside you in just his boxers and Hiragi had barely taken his jacket and band shirt off.

“Are you going to touch me too, Hiragi-sama?” You teased with the honorific as Hiragi tried to silence the groan that rumbled deep in his chest.

Now he understood why Kaji had a hard time saying no to you, why he found it difficult to think when he was with you like this; because Hiragi suddenly wanted to give you everything too.

“You’ll be lucky to get anything with that attitude.” Hiragi scoffed.

“What attitude?” You gave him an innocent smile with a tilt of your head that served to hide your true intentions.

“The attitude that you’re gonna have fucked outta’ ya.” He gave you a warning look before tearing his attention from you to look back at Kaji, who was currently stroking his palm along your bare thigh.

“Be nice,” Kaji furrowed his brows at you as your sultry eyes widened— the picture of faux chastity, and Hiragi wasn’t even sure whether the demand was for him or you.

“You don’t have to give in and do whatever she wants right away.” He tried to keep methodical about everything, his matter-of-fact tone had Kaji nodding with his jaw locked as he soaked up every piece of information like a sponge. Steel-blue eyes followed Hiragi’s hands as they smoothed a path along your bare legs, dipping his thumbs into the apex of your thighs as he felt the silky fabric of your panties with a dark groan.

“Sometimes it isn’t about the act itself, but the build-up.” Hiragi grinned as you tried to roll your hips into his touch, causing his thumb to press against the crotch of your panties as he heard the saccharine tone of your breath hitching in your throat, “If you give her what she wants right away, there will be nothing else to lead to.”

Kaji nodded as he watched his Senpai touch you so methodically, pressing the flat of his palm against your pelvis to stop you from grinding into him. It’s different watching you at the mercy of another, somewhat like a fever dream as he follows Hiragi’s movements. Trying to commit each sigh, gasp and whine to memory as his cock stirs beneath his boxers. The tip oozes pre as it sticks to the fabric, adjusting himself to give that slight relief as he tries to keep his focus.

“You can try touching her anywhere but where she needs it most,” Hiragi smiled as he reached up to palm one of your round breasts, catching your nipple between his thumb and forefinger as he tugged softly. Pulling more pretty sounds from your throat as you wiggled your hips enticingly.

“I thought you were gonna be nice, ‘Ragi.” You grumble.

“You thought wrong huh, sweetheart?” Hiragi scoffed, trying to hide the smile that threatened to beam across his cheeks as he shook his head, “Kaji might be nice to you, but I definitely ain’t nice.”

“Kaji’s always nice to me.” You huff, shooting him a look.

“And maybe that’s the problem,” He continued, his palm splayed flat against your pelvis as he watched you away your hips to try and gain contact where you needed it most, “Maybe Kaji needs to be a little meaner too.”

Hiragi found it hilarious that his friend had such a hard time being mean to you, when he was the complete opposite around his friends and classmates. Always ready to show the grumpy side of him that was a little rough around the edges, while saving up his sweetness for you like candy.

“Please, Ren.” You whined, canting your hips to try and give your neglected clit some much-needed friction as Hiragi’s body prevented you from rubbing your thighs together, “Need to cum.”

The dark patch against the sheer lace of your panties would’ve been enough to have Kaji surrendering himself, giving you exactly what you wanted. But Hiragi held restraint, your shameless pleas falling on deaf ears as he continued to tug and tease your perky nipples.

You gave another desperate cry. A sound that would usually always work on Kaji, but Hiragi saw right through it. His face was firm as he ignored the sound you made, even though it had his cock throbbing beneath his jeans. Pressing the heel of his palm against his thick girth beneath the thick denim to try and ease the tension that was building rapidly between his thighs, the restrictive fabric has his cock pulsing and desperate for some sort of relief.

“Tell her no.” He replied bluntly, and it had Kaji’s heart beating hard and fast inside his chest.

“Ren never says no to me.” You sassed back, sticking your tongue out childishly as it made Hiragi want nothing more than to bend you over his knee.

“Not this time, sweetheart.” Hiragi shook his head, leaning forward to pinch your tongue between his thumb and forefinger as you took the opportunity to curl it around his index finger, the subtle movement almost had him waving the white flag as he indulged in you. Watching your glossy lips wrap around his digit as he pictured how they’d look wrapped around his cock, leaving him throbbing beneath his pants as he pulled his finger away, dragging down on your bottom lip as he shook his head.

“Tell her that it isn’t that easy to get what she wants,” Hiragi smirked when your lips curled into a pout, turning his attention back to Kaji, “She needs to work for it.”

Hiragi was being mean. You thought to yourself as you slid your fingers along your tummy, following the curve of your body towards your parted thighs to satisfy yourself as a warmth bloomed in your core.

“Is she always this disobedient?” Hiragi catches your wrist in a large palm before your fingers make it to their destination, struggling against his rough grip was futile as he easily overpowered you.

“Get off me.” You whined pathetically as you tried to tug your wrist away.

“She listens sometimes.” Kaji watched closely as the corner of his lips curled up in amusement at the way his Senpai handled you.

“Naughty girls need to be put back in their place.” Hiragi chastised you, squeezing your wrist as his thumb pressed into your pulse point. He manhandles you as though you weigh nothing, placing you on your hands and knees as he bends you over. Landing a harsh smack against your ass that has your body jolting forward as you moan loud in a mixture of pain and pleasure.

“Let her suck your cock, Kaji.” Hiragi commands, “If she does a good enough job we’ll let her sit on it.”

You wiggled your hips, receiving another harsh spank from Hiragi as Kaji stood by the bed. Letting his jeans and boxers drop around his ankles as he stepped out of them, allowing his long cock to hang free.

Reaching out with slender fingers when Kaji stepped close enough, wrapping your hand around the base of him before pressing a languid kiss to the leaky tip. Your tongue swiped at his slit to taste him as he held the back of your head carefully, tilting you up as you wrapped your lips around the swollen head to suck gently.

“Fuck.” Kaji groaned, half-lidded eyes staring down at you while you took more of his heady cock inside your eager mouth. Deliberately pushing yourself forward as the flat of your tongue smoothed along its underside, pressing against the prominent veins that forked towards his base as your moans vibrated around him.

“How’s she doing, Kaji?” Hiragi asked as he smoothed a warm palm over the cheek he’d just spanked, “Is she bein’ good?”

“Ugh,” He grunted, “Yeah. So good.”

You preened at his praise, coaxing him deeper inside your mouth as you hollowed your cheeks to suck hard. His blunt nails dragged against your scalp as he tightened his grip on your hair, holding you steady as he thrust his hips forward roughly. The sudden motion had his swollen tip breaching the curve of your throat, cutting off your oxygen as you began to gag and splutter around him.

“You’re so good,” Kaji groaned, allowing you to pull back for a moments respite as strings of your spit and his pre clung to your lips and pearly tears clung to your thick lashes– you looked royally fucked already. And the sight of you had Kaji’s cock twitching as he wrapped his palm around his base to try and stave his climax. His heavy balls were ready to spill their spend into your eager hole, but he didn’t want to cum just yet–

“You’re okay, sweetheart,” Hiragi followed the curve of your spine as he pressed a kiss to your sacrum, “Doin’ such a good job, Kaji just got a little carried away, yeah?”

You nodded, wetting your lips to taste him on your tongue as you moved to take him back between your lips. You could tell Kaji was more confident this time, more assertive as he stopped you from taking him back into your mouth. Holding your head with his calloused palms as he tilted you up to him, his throat bobbing before he hunched over to spit inside your open mouth. Feeling the warm liquid hit your tongue as it pooled at the back of your throat as Kaji moved to push his cock back inside you immediately after.

He set a deliberate pace, giving slow precise thrusts inside your eager mouth. Holding the back of your head steady as you felt his tip hit the back of your throat again, mixing your spit as you encouraged him this time, holding onto the backs of his thighs to urge him closer as he began to fuck your throat. You forced back the desire to gag as you began to breathe through your nose, teary eyes looking up at him as his Adam’s apple bobbed against the column of his neck. A mixture of drool cascading down your chin and onto the sheets beneath you as you tried to take in as much of him as you could.

You gasped when you felt Hiragi’s hand come down on the curve of your ass again, creating tiny jolts of electricity against your skin on impact as the skin began to darken under his ministrations. The movement allowed Kaji to force his cock even deeper, as he began to cant his hips with purpose, using you for his own pleasure as he fucked your throat.

Your nails left pretty red lines against his skin as you held onto his thighs, making no attempt to pull him away as you let him use you, and you indulged in it. Hearing Hiragi chuckle behind you as he continued to tease your clothed heat, running the tips of his fingers along the seam of your panties, dangerously close to dipping beneath the fabric.

“What do you think, Kaji—” Hiragi smirked, his warm palms stroking along the curve of your ass as he watched the way your panties disappeared between your slit, your folds peeking out on either side of the fabric as he couldn’t resist leaning forward to pinch your chubby pussy together between his thumb and forefinger, “Do you think she deserves to cum?”

“Yeah,” Kaji nodded, his mind clouded in a hazy bliss.

You whined in approval, trying to nod your head as Kaji continued to ease his hips against your face. Pushing the tip of his cock against the back of your throat before pulling back languidly.

“I think he’d agree to anything when you’ve got his dick down your throat though, sweet girl,” Hiragi smirked, pressing a kiss to the curve of your hip as he pressed a thumb against your clothed clit. Instantly causing you to jolt against him before chasing the sensation, desperate for more, “I bet this pussy’s even worse, hm? She could get him to do whatever you want–”

You mewled around Kaji’s length, pulling back to kiss the engorged tip as you looked up at your boyfriend expectantly, your lips wrapped around the slit to taste more of the pearlescent pre that gathered at the slit.

Hiragi dragged a knuckle through your clothed heat before tugging your panties to the side. He had to lock his jaw to stop the debauched grunt that echoed at the back of his throat from the sight of your bare cunt. Strings of your slick clung to your folds and glistened in the low light of the bedroom as he found his tongue poking out to instinctively lick his bottom lip, “But if Kaji thinks you deserve his cock, then we better listen to him hm?”

You gasped when Hiragi pressed two fingers into your ill-prepped hole, wet enough to take them with little resistance as he began to curl them towards the spongy spot inside you. Blunt nails dragged against your velvety walls with each flick of his wrist as he began to work them inside you with unbridled practice. It had you wondering how many women Hiragi had been with to know exactly what made your body tick, his experience spoke volumes in the way he moved and his actions. A complete contrast to Kaji who was still trying to learn how your body worked, and what you liked best.

“See what happens when you’re a good girl, sweetheart?” Hiragi cooed, reaching his calloused thumb down to press gentle circles against your puffy clit that had you shamelessly rolling your hips in tandem with his movements, focused on your own pleasure as you continued to tease the tip of Kaji’s cock.

You really were perfect.

“I know Kaji thinks you deserve to cum, but I’m not so sure.” Hiragi pulled his fingers out of your quivering hole as you whined from loss of contact, trying to coax him back in with a shameless twerk of your ass that only served to earn you another smack as Hiragi pulled your body upright with the back of your hair.

“Get on the bed, Kaji,” Hiragi spoke darkly, “This pretty girl is gonna earn her orgasm, aren’t you?”

Kaji moved to settle on the sheets beneath you, laying back on the mattress as Hiragi moved you to straddle his lean hips. Situating himself between Kaji’s spread thighs as he held you above his hips.

“He’s being so mean, Ren,” You practically sniffled, “I just wanna cum.”

“Behave.” Kaji growled and the dark lilt to his tone had your clit throbbing with desire.

You chanced sliding a hand down your pelvis as you teased the top of your mound, barely able to brush two of your fingers against your sensitive clit before Hiragi caught you again, holding your wrists behind your back as he forced your back to arch. Pressing your breasts out towards Kaji in an erotic display as he pressed his lips against the shell of your ear, “What did I tell you? Stop being disobedient.”

You dramatically choked back a sob, trying in vain to pout your lips the way you knew Kaji liked. The subtle jut of your bottom lip that had every ounce of his resolve crumbling as he caved to give you whatever you pleased– but this wouldn’t work on Hiragi.

“If you ever want any hope of fuckin’ the brat out of her, you better listen Kaji.” He growled, reaching around with his other hand to smack one of your breasts as it bounced from the assault, causing more jolts of pain to prickle against your skin.

“Make her ride you.” Hiragi continued, “Make her work for that orgasm.”

Kaji’s hands were rough as he held onto your side, fingers dipping into the fat of your hips as his other hand moved to fist his cock. Holding himself upright as he smoothed the leaky tip through your messy folds, feeling it catch against your tight hole as he began to push you down.

The stretch was instant as you felt him breach your tight hole, barely able to roll your hips in retaliation as he watched mystified as you sunk down on him inch by inch.

“Take it,” Kaji grunted, “Take it all.” And his words had your clit tingling in response as your walls greedily clamped down around him. Impatience was quick to creep up on you, as you practically forced yourself down on the final few inches. Bottoming out with a desperate cry as the neatly trimmed hairs at the base of his cock tickled your sensitive nub.

“She always this good at takin’ cock?” Hiragi grinned at his best friend over your shoulder, spanking your ass with glee.

“She always takes me so well.” Kaji groaned when you began to roll your hips on top of him, barely lifting yourself as you focused on the slightest friction against your needy clit. You rode him selfishly, seeking your own pleasure as you kept your movements soft and languid, feeling his cock stretching you open as he managed to drag against your inner walls with every movement.

Hiragi kept your wrists tight behind your back in one large palm as he moved the other up to wrap around the column of your throat, forcing your head back onto his shoulder as he squeezed your jugular. Restricting your airflow as you exhaled softly, lashes fluttering as your cunt mimicked your actions, squeezing Kaji’s cock as he grunted beneath you.

“I think you like being treated like this, don’t you pretty girl?” Hiragi’s sharp teeth nipped your earlobe as he tightened his grip, “You like being treated like a slut.”

Kaji’s eyes widened in surprise at the name, as your cunt spasmed in favour of it. Pulling a desperate groan from the back of his throat as Hiragi used his grip on your neck to set a rough pace. Forcing you down on his best friend's cock before lifting you, feeling his blunt cockhead bruise your cervix with each downward drop.

It was too much, and not enough at the same time as you were unable to subdue the needy sounds that spilled from your lips. Crying out in pleasure as Kaji’s cock battered your insides from the ferocity of your movements, his hands certain to leave bruises against your hips as he helped to force you down on his cock. The motion had your tits bouncing with each rough movement as you cried out in pleasure.

“I was right,” Hiragi chuckled, nuzzling your cheek, “It looks like she just needed to be treated like the slut she is.”

Your walls spasmed again at the crude tone of his voice as your head lulled forward, your chin pressed against the top of Hiragi’s hand as he pressed a kiss to the back of your shoulder.

“You like being called that?” Kaji tilted his head slightly, watchful eyes trying to gauge your reaction as though the way your cunt clenched around him in response wasn’t answer enough, “You want me to call you a slut?”

“Can you feel how much she liked it, Kaji?” He pressed, “Did you feel her little pussy squeeze your cock?”

You whined at the debauched tone of his voice, feeling Kaji begin to increase his pace as he fucked up into you with more force as Hiragi’s hand slipped from your neck to venture lower. Calloused digits reached around your body to rub at your clit, the tips of his fingers brushing the base of Kaji’s cock as both of you moaned in tandem.

“I’m gonna cum,” Kaji grunted as he felt the way your walls closed in on him in the telltale tremors of your own bliss, eagerly trying to milk him of his release.

“You’re gonna cum too, aren’t you?” Hiragi cooed at you, “Gonna cum all over his cock.”

You cried out, feeling the coil inside you dangerously close to breaking as Kaji tightened his grip on your hips, using his grip to add more force to his movements as he fucked up into you with renewed vigour. The force and intensity behind his thrusts, paired with the way that Hiragi’s fingers kept swishing your clit from side to side was enough to have you coming undone as you met your end, crying out Kaji’s name as the coil inside you snapped and you convulsed around his cock. Your greedy walls pulsed as they tried to milk his heavy balls of all they had to give.

“Good girl.” Kaji praised with a grunt as he found his own end, his cock throbbing as he came inside you with a grunt. Spilling his warm spunk into your eager hole as he filled you to the brim, pushing it deeper as he gave a few more lazy thrusts as you continued to clench around him in the aftershocks of your release.

Kaji’s praise had you preening, as Hiragi let go of your boneless arms to let you fall down onto Kaji’s chest. Immediately pressing a messy kiss to his lips as your sweat-soaked chests stuck together, his warm palms cupping your cheeks as his cock began to soften inside you. Feeling his spend begin to trickle out from either side of your quivering walls as it dripped down his balls and onto the sheets beneath you.

“Do you mind if I fuck her, Kaji?” Hiragi groaned, tugging his pants down just enough to free his aching cock as he gave himself an overdue tug. Groaning when his fist neared the top and he pushed a thick glob of pre-cum from the swollen tip, completely amped up.

It had your tummy doing somersaults at the fact that Hiragi hadn’t asked you, he’d asked your boyfriend. Your greedy cunt clenched around nothing as Kaji’s soft cock slipped from your abused hole.

“You don’t mind, do you, sweet girl?” He cooed, “Not when Kaji already made you cum nice and hard, yeah?”

You suddenly felt shy when Hiragi’s hand reached out to spread your ass apart, leaning back on his knees to look at your ruined hole as he watched Kaji’s cum continue to leak out of you. His cock pulsed with need as he imagined filling you up even more with his seed, kneading the mixture inside you to fuck it even deeper inside your pliant walls.

“You can fuck me, Hiragi.” You cooed so sweetly that it had Hiragi swearing beneath his breath. If you said his name like that, even he’d seem like a flustered virgin.

“‘Atta girl.” He grinned, sharp teeth gleaming as he moved into position behind you. Your body flat against Kaji’s as his slick cock nestled between the pair of you, delighting in the pressure as you felt Hiragi position himself at your fluttering hole.

He was thicker than Kaji, and the intrusion had you crying out in a mixture of pain and pleasure as his heavy balls pressed against your overstimulated clit. Giving you a cherished moment of respite before he began to fuck into you with veer. The crude sounds your cunt made as Hiragi used you for his own pleasure echoed around Kaji’s bedroom, as he fucked his load deeper into you, prodding it against your cervix as Hiragi let his thoughts begin to wonder.

It had been foolish of him really, a mistake he’d never made before. Blaming it entirely on the head between his thighs over the head on his shoulders as he remembered that he hadn’t even asked if you were on birth control. It was completely unlike him, and a sign of the fool that sex could make him into– but the thought alone had his mind racing as he began to think about how pretty you’d look stuffed full with his and Kaji’s spend– breeding your fertile womb with his ripe and potent cum. The thought had Hiragi even rougher, his hands fisting the sheets on either side of you as he curled his body over yours.

You could do nothing in this position but lay there and take it as Hiragi continued to use you for his own pleasure, Kaji’s fingers slipping between your bodies to twist and tug at your sensitive nipples as you felt his half-hard cock pressed against your clit where your bodies were pressed together, grinding against each other with each rough snap of Hiragi’s hips into your messy cunt.

You could feel Kaji getting hard beneath you again, the press of him against your tummy as you shimmied your hips to ensure he was snug against your clit. His steely eyes stared at you intently as he watched your face contort in pleasure at the hands of his best friend.

“Feels so good.” You managed to get out between whiny moans, your eyes rolling back when Hiragi hit a particular spot deep inside you as you buried your face in Kaji’s neck.

“Yeah?” Hiragi smirked, “You like that, huh? Like Kaji watching you get fucked.”

His words stroked the heat that continued to burn like wildfire inside you, flowing through your veins as he had you racing towards another mind-numbing orgasm. Kaji slid his clammy hands down your sides to rest against the top of your thighs, his blunt nails digging into the skin as he used his grip to force you back harder against Hiragi’s cock.

“You like me watching you get fucked like a slut?” Kaji tested the words on his tongue as you responded with a depraved whine that had his cock pulsing with desire, “Shit—”

“She clenched so hard when you said that, Kaji. God, she’s got such a good pussy,” Hiragi rasped, trying to dictate the pleasure that swirled in his pelvis as he danced on the edge of his release, “I’ve gotta pull out.”

“No,” You whined against Kaji’s neck as your lips curled into a pout, clamping down around his cock in a feeble attempt to keep him balls deep as he fucked into you.

“I’m not– condom.” Hiragi cursed at how pathetic and pussy-drunk you’d made him when he’d barely even done anything. The power of slipping inside a warm, wet hole without that thin latex barrier, he supposed.

“She’s on birth control,” Kaji answered, his grip bruising as he kept you fucking back onto his cock.

“Cum inside me please, Hiragi.” You pleaded, and it was enough to have him fighting back the desire to spill every drop of cum in his heavy balls inside your eager walls.

“You gotta give me one more first, sweetheart.” He grinned, “I know you’re close– can feel you clampin’ down around me.”

“I can’t,” You warbled, “S’too much.”

“Yeah, you can.” He grunted, smoothing his thumb over the puckered hole of your asshole before palming one of your ass cheeks to spread you open and increase the pressure, “Be a good girl and cum.”

You couldn’t hold back as you felt another release surge through you in harsh waves, squealing into the curve of Kaji’s neck as you drooled from the intensity of it. Your lower half jerked roughly as your toes curled, and both men continued to move your body against them to help you ride out your release.

“Oh fuck,” Hiragi groaned as he adjusted his hips, deliberately focusing his thrusts hard and deep inside you as he finally met his end. Pushing hot ropes of cum directly against your battered cervix as he filled you with his spend, mixing with Kaji’s as you felt the warmth consume you whole.

Kaji wasn’t far behind, as he unabashedly used your body for his pleasure, grinding you down against his heavy cock as he felt himself cum hard. Huge rivulets of cum spurted in thick globs from his tip and pooled against his chest as he fucked himself through it, coaxing out every last drop as you felt the wetness of it stick to your skin.

“Are you gonna stay, ‘Ragi?” You murmured sleepily as Kaji rolled you onto your back gently. Accepting the towel that Hiragi had offered to him to help clean up the mess both men had made of you. Swiping it along your tummy before delicately tracing it between your thighs, muttering out soft apologies when he was too rough with your overstimulated folds.

“I should leave you guys to it,” He grinned, tugging his black band shirt back on after buckling his belt, “Although, you can call me if you ever need help with anything again,”

He leaned over the mattress as he clasped Kaji’s shoulder in a warm palm, leaning over his best friend to press a lingering kiss against your bent knee before he let his fingers trail through your folds towards the swell of your ass.

“I was actually gonna ask if you’d ever used this hole before.” He grinned, “Maybe we can try that next time.”

[ghostickle]

.

[thebirdandhersong]

I think the problem. the problem is that I have always been afraid of not being invited into the inner circle. and am always wanting to be part of the inner circle. inner circle being the circle of love and companionship and communion. of course being a TCK and a bit of a sheltered homeschooled oddball child has nudged this further along over the years. but I didn't realise how STRONG that desire still burned. to actually be wanted.

[venacoeurva]

Learning so many youtubers are parents who for most of their online popularity weren’t lately is jarring, partially because a lot of them still look so young and I associate them with being like. early 20s. so my brain can’t get past that, but still refreshing that the reason this is also jarring is because they apparently don’t put their kid out there online and didn’t make their entire channels about being a parent

[bunnihearted]

i've also realized that there is no therapy that can fix what's broken inside of me

[storm-of-feathers]

I'm so close to breaking lol but we stay silly

[radmista]

My cat just ran outside while I was taking my dog out to the bathroom, refuses to come back while calling her and shaking food at her. Actively runs in the opposite direction. And ofc someone broke the laser pointer I keep on my keys so I can't trick her back into the apartment. I'm so pissed that shit broke off, all my other crappy keychains are still attached. The laser was how I got her back last time she escaped but she'd only taken a few steps out and I was able to snatch her.

And I'm not supposed to have her so I can't even notify the apartment complex a cat is missing 😐 guess she's an outdoor cat now :/

[cinnamon-phrog]

Can I please have some comfort right now, if that's okay? People are watching me.

[certified-anakinfucker]

ok this is unprompted but if you pride yourself on being the reason people leave a space for something they genuinely love and have done no objective wrong - youre a piece of shit btw. like full send youre horrible.

[poisonedfate]

not to get deep on this lovely tuesday evening, but i wonder when exactly did everything go wrong

[snapbackslide]

two traumatic things happened to me today but then i got to watch twenty one pilots’ first live show of the new era on someone’s instagram live so ! 😁

it actually felt like i was right there and i can’t believe this is all real rn. i have waited for this era for SO LONG. and to think i got to hear overcompensate, next semester, and backslide in a live version… wow.

i got really tipsy earlier, which i don't drink anymore but i was in so much emotional pain and needed to forget. there was a form of abuse that took place at work, then almost got into a car accident because some dude was pissed at me and tried to cut in front of me violently and gave me the finger. and to top it off he looked exactly like my ex. i was shaking for hours after i got home because i couldn’t believe all this would happen. and i just don’t think i ever want to remember today. so i’m prolly gonna delete this post later.

but i wanted to vent a little cause i missed talking to people on here, even though no one wants to hear my sob stories anymore. i just can’t believe the trauma i’ve been going through repeatedly. just so much abuse i was never even aware of, and some that i’m still going through and i’m having a hard time breaking free from.

having my favourite band back though is doing so much for me mentally, their songs feel like emotional support, and my drives were my therapy until the bullshit from today happened. i’m just always scared and broken and i’m really trying my hardest, i swear. i’ve healed from a lot but then new shit happened and my loneliness has been the worst it’s ever been. i don’t know.

i know i need therapy but i don’t know where to get it from, because i can’t trust anyone with my mind apparently. i’ve tried, twice, and both instances failed. once from a stranger, once from someone i knew. it just feels so crippling and lonely and in the morning i feel like i can get through it myself, but when i near the afternoons i just want to never wake up again. i know that’s dark and i’m sorry but like, yeah, that’s just where i am rn.

hence the lengthy breaks and being more quiet on my public social media. and then, watching guys i liked being wrapped around other girls, watching all my friends be coupled up and achieve their goals and being happy, it just enhances the loneliness, and i want to be happy for them but how do you do that when depression is so loud it won’t even let you breathe sometimes.

i don’t know how but it feels like i’m both getting better and getting worse with the years. maybe medication’s the only way, maybe i just need to find one single person who will genuinely care about me, maybe it won’t get better because our world is fucked and watching the news only makes me want to dig the hole deeper. all i know is that i want to be alive and i want to heal. i just wish it wasn’t so hard and fragile.

[your-fave-is-bi]

i love how knitting patterns have super detailed and exact instructions on what to use etc etc and every time i look at one im like. what if i....didn't exactly do that? and just kinda fucked with your instructions a bit hm?