#I hate my irrational brain | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

satans-knitwear · 3 months

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Do what you want with me

Just tell me when you're done

#When it doubt... Get the song lyrics out. Hehehe #Not getting along with my body rn (still 🙄) but I am gonna still try to post the stuff I do take even if I hate me in them 😅#My brain is mostly irrational therefore I cannot trust it regarding opinions on myself.#At least i have fun lingerie #I need to buy some cooling pads for the fluffy babies. They don't sleep well in the warm nights 😴😢#Anywhore! Have some very blue lingerie ✨#cheeky #satans knitwear #alt pinup #pinup girl #pretty lingerie #Floral lingerie #Spotify

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moon-buggg · 16 days

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Having. Kind of a time. Does anyone have recommendations for good dca fluff stories?

#i hate knowing when my brain is being irrational yet not being able to Stop it

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steveharrington · 3 months

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does working full time making anyone else irrationally bitter and resentful or is that just a me issue

#and i do mean irrational like to the highest degree #i can’t control it i don’t Want to be this way but my brain just Does It #i am so unhappy with the fact that i have to spend 40 hours every week doing something i hate that gives me extreme anxiety #and that manifests in me viewing anyone who doesn’t have to do that as an object of intense envy #even though i like. know logically that everyone has shit they don’t wanna do

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toytulini · 3 months

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me, stupidly and weirdly resistant to listening to audio books vs reading a physical book for no real reason: man i wish there was a way to like, read a book while i crochet like i do with tv shows and movies and podcasts

#toy txt post #my reasons are irrational you dont need to try to talk me into it. i KNOW #its very silly of me #imagine how much reading i could get done. but alas. Feels Bad #even listening to a more. uh. Story type podcast or fiction like nightvale was a bit difficult to start for me. i like nightvale now i #listened. but i worry that is clocking in my brain as an Exception 😔 maybe it would be easier if i tried some nonfiction books? scary #i also struggle with single host podcasts apparently even tho im also ehhhh on the kind where the structure is the host Interviewing a #different person everytime? maybe it would be okay with a nonfiction audiobook tho cos it would be getting read by a narrator and not sound #so much like a guy ranting into a mic which makes me feel a little insane. altho propaganda doesnt necessarily always sound like a guy #ranting into a mic so idk. i could probably make it through if i can find a nice book about like. parasitic worms. i could tolerate #feeling like im falling into sigma male affirmations videos for worms i think. wormffirmations are allowed #*to clarify i dont listen to those but listening to better offline makes me feel like im morphing into the kinda guy who does and i hate it #which feels unfair cos he is RIGHT and the podcast is good but i need there to be like a cohost there to break the tension of the Ranting #sometimes he has guests on? but its not quite the same #i think the format i like best is either like 2 or 3 regular cohosts discussing things within a specific topic #OR. 1 host whos like infodumping to the other host who knows nothing about the subject. OR. 2 hosts info dumping to each other about #different aspects of the subject. OR. 1 host who brings on fun guests to infodump to them about a subject. and then obviously the subject #needs to intrigue me. ex. sawbones well theres your problem (I HATE THAT THIS ONE IS BEST EXPERIENCED ON YOUTUBE😭 I WANT THEM TO JUST DUMP #ALL THE SLIDES INTO A BIG BLOG POST SOMEWHERE AND I CAN CHECK IN AND FOLLOW ALONG THAT WAY WITHOUT HAVING TO HAVE MY PHONE SCREEN ON THE #WHOLE TIME!!!!!!!!! but. im listening for free so its unreasonable to demand more of them BUT ALSO I FEEL LIKE JUST COPYPASTING ALL OF THE #SLIDES INTO A BIG BLOG POST ISNT THAT MUCH MORE EFFORT THAN EDITING A WHOLE YOUTUBE VIDEO? WAAAAAH. THEY DONT NEED TO BE TIMESTAMPED OR #ANYTHING JUST THROW EM IN ILL FIGURE IT OUTTTTTT #anyway. also more than 3 hosts is really pushing my ability to keep track of voices.#anyway: sawbones wtyp tpwky behind the bastards scam goddess #(which is true crime adjacent but focuses mainly on scams and isnt copaganda and laci is funny and cool)#common descent pod completely arbortrary maintenance phase if books could kill #deep sea podcast has more bringing ppl in to interview them about shit than i personally enjoy but i put up with it cos i do like the hosts #and the subject

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sucharide · 2 months

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can someone explain me why routine makes my brain feel angrry?????????

like why?????

Me: 'i want to get up early every day so i can have more productive mornings'

My brain: 'So you want to imprison me? You want to put me in a cage? you want to torture me?'

Me: 'no its just that we feel pretty good when we get up before 7am and achieve something before midday. and we sleep better.'

My brain: 'I hope you die. i hope we both die.'

#i hate routine so much #idk why #it's irrational.#anyway i always feel better when i do it tho!!!!#but my brain always tries to throw a trantrum #roach rambles

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sillyabtmusic · 7 months

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(240314) Fifty-Fifty : J-min Ending Fairy

#bae173 #j-min #jeon minwook #nugudom #kflops #kpopstages #peaktimenet #malegroupsnet #* my gifs #nkd.gif #173.gif #173.jm #potentially my era of giffing every minute ending fairy again. i have a passion for it. i do not care that they're simple it makes me smile #off topic. i hate differentiating between minute (noun) and minute (adjective) over text lol #also off topic. i feel i am good at bae173 faces but when i was learning them i kept mixing up j-min and bit and i have an irrational fear #i've still got it wrong </3 i know i have it right but it eats at the back of my brain

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mejomonster · 2 months

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I hate panic attacks

#rant #which is to say i hate the whirlwind of specifically bad times in my life that brought them on and kept them #i hate that they trigger when i feel strong Anything #ive been trying to Dissassociate less and feel more. because feeling stuff does HELP me notice whats helping or hurting me #but like. i WISH it was about feeling joy and pleasure and excitement. maybe ill feel those eventually #but right now Any strong emotion is still ridiculously close to triggering panic attacks #im still terrified to go watch a play. because i LOVE plays and the last times ive gone for the past decade #ive had awful panic attacks because my brain clicked Love them with Intense Feeling into Panic dont breathe chest hurts Hate Urself #turns out my brain didnt just attach the trigger to fear of loud noises or fear of asking for #trigger from self hating thiught loops #it alsp clicked the trigger into: particularly notiveable romantic feelings of any kind (lile someome? have a panic attack! thatll keep u #physically incapable of getting near them! like plays! lets have you unable to breathe sobbimg hysterical so ur terrified to be trapped in #the audiience for hours! fucking hate hate hate it)#neurofeedback and emdr certainly lowered the panic attack rate per day or week to a Lesser per month situation #but im still lucky if i get thru a pa without illogivally trying to Fix it the irrational way i did when young which is hit myself #in the illogical hope if im injured enough ill be able to think again (which doesnt work its dangerous and makes the panic attack last #longer a pa just does Not let u think rationally untol its over u CANNOT try and fix it while in it and dping that makes it much worse)#if i get thru a pa without a concussion ive done much better than usual :/ i dont want any more #im so tired man. i want to go see a play!#i dont want to Try and then end up hyperventilating and crying with my brain imsisting i Need To be Dead for 2 hours #im the parking lot because it triggers when i park. or worse it triggers when i drive and i have to pull over and im trapped x place for #hours. either way i miss the play i wanted to fucking see!#i hate how panic attacks feel like a trap. not even a trap i can fight. its my own limitation. goddamn ive been fatigued ive been dying #in a hospital a few times. panic attacks feel worse to me. at least dying i can do something (eventually) to stop #altho i guess dying for hours in hospital until i got helped was similar. but ill hopefully only go thru that 1-2 more times in life #and i had like 5 panic attacks during that hospital visit since a heart rate so high like 200 cant calm down anyway

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stupid-elf · 4 months

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Okay dandy, what is "it's not about the bread"? I recognized everything else

Ah! It's not about the bread is a phrase fairly common in marriage counseling/relationship advice circles. It comes from a popular anecdote of a husband in counseling saying his wife is always blowing up at him about petty things, like buying the wrong brand of bread. The therapist asks the wife why she's upset about the bread, and she says it's because he is chronically inattentive to her and their collective needs so she ends up carrying the slack. It's not about the bread: It's about what's manifesting through the bread

Humans are not rational creatures, we're rationalizing. It takes a lot of self awareness to be in one's own head and go "oh. I'm not upset about the bread, I'm mad because this is the third time this week and the twentieth time this month I have to come up with a new dinner plan because this idiot fucked up." However, it takes much less awareness to look at one's partner and go "hm. That was an outsized reaction. Something larger than what set this off is probably going on."

Once you've realized there's something going on, partners can begin working towards a solution. You have to pull back the rug to find what's been swept under it.

Emotions all have causes. Sometimes they're bigger than they seem like they should be, and sometimes the cause is buried deep in the unconscious parts of the brain, but there's always a reason. Part of loving someone is trying to understand them, and part of understanding them is sussing out when it's about the bread... And when you should maybe start writing a more detailed grocery list

#it's not about the bread #stupid elf tries to explain marriage counseling concepts while neither married nor a counselor #there's a good chance the anecdote is taken from a tv show episode and the some psychologist wrote a book about it #cheers #also periods are like this #hormones don't make New Emotions they just exacerbate existing emotions #so if somebody is suddenly angry about things that don't normally bother them they're probably bothered they just suppress/don't express it #it's not irrational it's just a little convoluted #like all those stories of pregnant women being Totally Irrational about food #and then it's discovered that the brain knows what the body's nutritional needs are it just doesn't share that properly #so sometimes lines get crossed and eating the wrong thing is Going To Kill Baby Don't Let This Happen Nooooo #and it's just a ham sandwich but the brain only knows there's no lettuce and the body needs iron and This Won't Do #be sympathetic and be curious about your partner #and everybody will be happier and love deeper :)#today on I literally gained the legal ability to drink four days ago but I can talk like an old person giving advice to the younguns #thank you all wise elders for not hating me for my insolence I will keep being insolent now

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cringasaurus-rex · 7 months

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it would be nice if i wasn't always kinda scared to text like anyone just to talk because i don't want to risk annoying them

#social anxiety #txt #i just want to talk but i gotta be irrational about it #i hate my brain sometimes

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s-ccaam-era-crepe · 3 months

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holy shit this phobia is going to ruin my life

#camera talks #/overdramatic cuz im not going to work w/ horses but also not entirely overdramatic bc my sibling works w/ horses and i live w/ them #anyway #the horses are out and i was going to help my mom outside for chores but as soon as i saw the horses i freaked out. yelled and ran off #then got totally frozen in place while crying #like. they were literally tied down so they couldnt even get me if they wanted to. they werent even close to me #but my brain does Not care about that #it hurts my brain to be so afraid of something that has done nothing to me but i refuse to see reason #and i have super easy exposure therapy if i wanted. i literally live with 3 of them #but again. my brain does Not care #god. i hate phobias so much #i dont think this is normal fear of horses. this is so so irrational and i have such bad responses to them like. 99% sure its a phobia #anyways. holing up in my room now. still fucking shaking this is stupid

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transbrucewayne · 6 months

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a loose visual representation of how it feels to have a favorite person (bpd)

#lemme tell ya being someone who’s disgustingly self aware and also Very Mentally Ill is one of the worst combos because like #can’t do shit about it.#I cry and then go wtf why am I crying thats irrational etc etc #or it’s too cringe to post about online #I hate brain development bc it’s only making me more aware and logical but not making my mental illnesses any better 😁🫶#wat da fawk #anyway I’m fine we’re doing great guys we live we laugh we love #my post #bpd

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arcaneyouth · 3 months

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oh god i hope the emotional problems dont turn me into an asshole right as art fight starts holy shit

#vent post #negative #day 2 of bad rsd in a row this does not bode well #knowing my brain there are two ways this goes down.#1. i feel like shit and then art fight hits and i go oh yeah people love me!! and move on #2. i start crying because i didnt get an attack within 5 minutes of the game starting #number 1 is the ideal scenario tbh. please please please #number 2 is very possible tho like i KNOWWWW THATS SO IRRATIONAL #but i have BRAIN DISORDERS #my stupid ass is gonna be sitting there sniffling and crying and going back to bed #because nobody can draw me a fully rendered piece in 5 minutes #ITS SO DUMB I HATE THAT IT DOES THIS #with any luck tho it'll just be the first one orz and if it is the second one i am NOT making it anyone problem #but until my brain decides i want to feel loved again im the fucking wringer #(to be clear nobody needs to help me with this #i know how my brain works and i need highly specific scenarios to happen for my brain #to not think everyone wants me dead. its very dumb. i will figure out how to solve it myself #the ironic thing is giving me a ton of love and affection will not fix it because its not 'right'#so no this cant be solved by you. i am simply complaining and wailing)

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mikeru-funzies · 3 months

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tysm for the ask it was so fun answering it!! :D

(i’m glad you sent me that too because i love your art but i’m terrified of talking to cool people for some reason 😭 also i need more mutuals so if u would like to that would be so sick :,))

YEAH OFC MY PLEASURE!!!

hell yes let’s be mutuals Ralph💪💪

(actually I think we became mutuals in the time you sent this so… double mutuals? mutuals+?)

#I think you’re pretty cool id love to be friends #SAME IM SO SCARED OF TALKING TO PEOPEL #ik the fear is irrational but my brain loves telling me everyone hates me for some reason #anxiety gang #THABK YOU BTW!!

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neverendingford · 7 months

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#every time a character does the whole “talk softly and reassure the dangerous person” thing while also walking ominously towards them ughh #it drives me absolutely nuts. like. you're trying to talk them down from paranoia while you're threateningly walking towards them?#someone does that to me and I'm shooting them at least in the leg or stabbing with whatever makeshift spear I've manufactured #anyway. criminal minds is getting real annoying with the whole pathologizing of people.#like. guy shows signs of being very good at torturing people and they go “ah yes.. a pure sadist” or whatever the fuck #I get that it's shitty crime drama stuff but still. ugh.#I just. I fucking hate when people take the obviously wrong route when talking to mentally destabilized people.#like. people are shit at talking to suicidal people. are shit at talking down irrational fears. people are shit at talking down paranoia.#I hate how people don't fucking know how to interact with freaks I hate how people don't know how to interact with me #everyone acts on their own level without understanding what it's like in any way #and so everyone just projects their own reality onto you without performing any sort of empathy or exercising any sort of understanding #and I want to scream so fucking loud #you're all living in a cotton candy world and your words disintegrate in my humidity #and it's so fucking lonely #and my mind has been clear this past week. the autistic need for pressure satisfied by this prescription pushing on my brain #and I can feel the cogs turning. the wheels and pins and linked gear trains and drive shafts and traction band motors.#all the parts of my brain churning around and I can't get close because the heat from my motor makes my hood hot to the touch.#I burn your hand as you try and press your palm against my flanks.#only think saddle and tack make contact. strict guidelines and harsh rules to govern me.#when I am free I buck and I shift gait and I drag you under too-low branches #also. compared to Hannibal I can basically listen to criminal minds as a podcast. none of the visuals really contribute anything to the show #like. feels very shallow

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oetscop · 1 month

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unfortunately i am still not normal about petscop bc im watching a video abt bowling alley animations and i cant even finish it bc he used like 5 whole seconds of school in the bg

#tongue #I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO EXPLIN THIS #IDK WHY IM LIKE THIS im not like this about literally anything else #im still making myself watch it bc this is IRRATIONAL OF ME but oh my god #im not like gatekeeping the series obviously i literally make everyone i know talk about it #but i get so weird about it even tho ive yknow. dealt w the brain shit i hate talking abt #for the most part anyway #i shouldnt still be insane about it

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itslookingback · 9 months

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:(

#would love not to be obsessive and on edge and uncomfortable and anxious all the time. would love to have a normal brain for one day #i hate feeling like this because it's like yes i know i'm being irrational!!!! but things are distressing and it hurts #i don't want to be constantly one moment away from a sensory overload or about to snap at someone. yes i want to feel more happy #i don't know how to become this though. everything is out of my control and i'm trying to make do #mumbles

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