#I have a couple of ideas for wacky political fics

[steelthroat]

I have the sudden need to write a fic in which Optimus and Megatron start bantering about politics and shit and Megatron is sure he won the debate and starts goading Optimus but then...

Boom

Optimus folds him like a homelette (not literally) and is like, "bich u dumb?" And starts explaining why everything he just said is wrong. He's a bad politician, and he's too full of himself and needs to be humbled.

And Megatron thinks about it, and actually, yeah... he's screwed.

[demdifferentstories-29]

20 Questions Game

Thanks for the tag, @bronzeagepizzeria <3

How many works do you have on AO3?

68!

2. What's your total AO3 words count?

734,052

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently, I really only write Doctor Who aside from a handful of other one-offs I've written, but I literally have at least a hundred WIPs/ideas in my drafts.

Fandoms that I have tons of ideas for are Broadchurch and Jessica Jones (TV series), which I hope to get around to publishing. But I have a fair bit of range hiding away haha.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

In descending order:

Broken-Hearted (cross-over with Broadchurch; multi-chapter; completed)

Braids (one-shot)

Desperate Measures (multi-chapter; completed)

Exes and Ohs (one-shot)

A Lesson in Romantic (AU; multi-chapter; completed)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Pretty much as soon as I can! I appreciate engagement so much and I want to make that known to commenters. Plus, I love a bit of banter and discussion where prompted - it's a delight!

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oooo, boy. Probably Happy Together? Or maybe the first chapter of Sunburn? Violet Hill was also pretty sad. I love me some dark, heavy stories that fuck up my beloved blorbos.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Although I haven't updated in it in quite a while, I've written a fair bit of the sequels for the A Lesson in Romance universe, and, boy, have I made those two have a (mostly) happy life together.

In terms of published stories, I think Study Buddies would take the cake or one of the many TentooRose pieces I've done. The former is very classic, high school sweetheart vibes with just enough angst dashed in, and I tend to keep the latter sweet, fluffy and horny.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I received some very intense 'constructive' criticism whilst writing A Lesson in Romance - like I'm talking extremely long paragraphs pretty much deconstructing my writing and questioning my content. I was young at the time, it was my first multi-chapter Doctor Who fic, and the fact that this person also pretty much outright told me how I should write my story pissed me off a bit, so I, in the most polite way possible, asked them to stop reading my story and leaving these comments.

Aside from that? I've really only had one sort of bad comment since then, but I opted to not reply.

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Oh, you know I do ;) I currently only write F/M; have explored M/M in the past so I'm down to write queer smut if the inspiration ever strikes.

I'm not really a fan of overly kinky stuff that is, say, explicit/specific (e.g. BDSM), but I don't mind stuff that is vaguely/lightly kinky (i.e. I tend to include voyeurism in my stories, but it's generally accidental). I mostly write either very horny or emotional, intimate stuff - I'm a sucker for the feelings associated with the couple.

It honestly depends on what kind of story I'm writing! But as of recent, I've been mostly producing first-time, emotion-heavy smut with a good serving of horniness/wantonness to build up the tension.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I've written two - Broken-Hearted and Fobwatched (if you've been waiting for an update, I promise I think of her often... I'll revive her one day). I'd say BH is crazier, as it does entwine itself with the Human Nature storyline from Doctor Who, but Fobwatched has also had some pretty wacky moments!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge, and I really hope not! I have, admittedly, been a bit fearful of it in recent months.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Again, not to my knowledge! But I'm always open to that conversation if people are interested.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Back when I wrote band/music fanfiction (please forgive me for my crimes), I had started drafting out a fic with someone, but it never went anywhere and we didn't communicate very well either :,)

However, I have been beta-ing the lovely @quite-right-too's fic Dona Nobis Pacem, which has been a lovely collaboration <3 I'm so proud of Cody's work and highly recommend you read it if you haven't!

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

It would probably be DoctorRose! I've never really been more enthralled with a ship before, and the fact that the special interest is still going strong three years on is a pretty good sign. I also tend to come back to Ellie and Alec from Broadchurch quite often.

In the past, I was a hardcore Reylo fan, and I've always enjoyed random, niche ships within my realm of interests (i.e. Evey and V from V For Vendetta; Jackson and Lisa from Red Eye; an array of ships from my horror movies because I love being delusional).

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Look, I'm quite stubborn in my belief that, ultimately, I will finish all my drafts, but I can say that the drafts from when I first started writing Doctor Who fanfiction have been quite difficult to work on because my writing has changed so much since then!

There are also maybe a WIP or two that I have written purely for myself and will never publish. I will probably take these to my deathbed lol.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Hm, I've always been complimented for character accuracy, which I do think I have down pact - writing characters like Ten and Rose have gradually become more comfortable for me over the years and I feel like I know them quite well by this point, which is really surprising considering I've never done a proper rewatch of the show since finishing it aside from some scenes/particular episodes!

I've also always been very anal about detail in my stories - I love including the most unnecessary shit in my work!! Do you need to know what Rose had for breakfast? No. Are you gonna know anyway? YES!!! I just love making my stories feel as organic and lifelike as possible.

I've been working really hard on scenery recently, which I've been getting compliments on! I have aphantasia, so this is something I've put a lot of energy and focus into as I've come to realise it's pretty important for readers lol.

And, not to brag, but I do think I write some pretty banging smut. It's taken ten or so years of practice, but I got there in the end.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Eh, I feel I'm not super great at coming up with like... proper action/plot. Like I can do circumstances and events quite alright, but coming up with something like... say, escaping from a villain/bad situation, I've always felt pretty shit at accomplishing. However, I always try to improve.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I only speak English, so it's a bit daunting! But I just use Google Translate and consult others where possible. And, as Niyati has mentioned in her own post, I recently used her technique of writing from the non-speaker's perspective and it's been a welcome addition to my skills! Shout out, girlie <3

19. First fandom you wrote for?

It would've been 5SOS, but those fics are long gone - I deleted them from Wattpad, and the iPod that the original drafts are on doesn't work, unfortunately.

I also wrote about other bands that I listen to - Asking Alexandria, Of Mice & Men, You Me At Six, Pierce the Veil, and Bring Me The Horizon. I still have most of the drafts, but I deleted all but four of them from the internet lol (the ones that were deleted were unfinished works).

I don't write about these people anymore as I did come to realise, Wait a minute, it's kinda weird and gross to write about these people like this lol (no hate on anyone who does). But I'm always down to chat about my sordid past haha.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

I would have to say "Come, gentle night, come" as it's probably the most amount of effort I put into writing. I think it's my best smut and cherish it deeply!

Tagging: @quite-right-too, @deardiary17, @insomniac-101, @metacrisisdoctor

[sineala]

i guess this isnt really specific to a single fanfic but: when you think of a plot, how do you decide whether youre going to pull characterization from 616 or ults stevetony?

Oh! Interesting question! Thank you!

A lot of times the question of what universe to set a story in doesn't even come up, because the idea is so solidly grounded in the events of that canon that it wouldn't make sense to set it in another universe. If I want to write, say, a story about the time Ults Steve was a vampire, it's going to be Ults. If I want to write a story that's a canon-divergent AU where Tony never hallucinates Steve in "Haunted" and that's how he figures out Steve isn't dead... I mean, that's gonna be 616.

The question I run into more frequently is "what era of 616 is this story set in?" and that's when I ask myself things like "okay, does Steve know Tony is Iron Man in this one?" and if the answer is yes that knocks out everything before 1982 unless I'm writing something where the reveal is an AU. "Are they on the same team?" knocks out most of the rest of the 80s and about half of the 90s. "Do they still live in the mansion?" knocks out everything after Avengers Disassembled and I guess that's why I have a couple dozen stories set during Volume 3. Heh. Sometimes I want to bring in a particular team member as a supporting character and I'll pick a time when they're on the team. Or I have a villain -- say, Ghost or Madame Masque -- and then I'll look for a time to set it when I know that villain is alive and doing something interesting and that will often suggest to me the nature of the plot, if the plot extends beyond, like, "Steve and Tony have a relationship." I do often write stories where the canon events are happening in the background, just differently.

But, like, maybe I just have, like, a trope I want to explore and the universe isn't set...

Reasons I Might Set Fic In 616

I want fic about identity porn.

I want fic about Tony's sobriety.

I want fic where Steve and Tony have been BFFs for years and live in the mansion and everything is happy.

I want the universe where Tony found Steve in the ice and Tony's voice was the first thing Steve heard and Tony canonically describes this as the best day of his life. Where they've just sort of headed for each other right from the beginning.

I want fic in a universe where Steve and Tony have tried to kill each other a few times and are just, y'know, living with that. Or maybe that hasn't happened yet! There's a lot of time here.

Basically I want them to know each other and have A History and whether that's good or bad is dependent on that particular fic.

Reasons I Might Set Fic In Ults

I'd like some grimdark.

I'd also like really, really wacky plots.

I want to remix the villains/plots of 616 with more angst.

I'd like a universe with a little more realism in it and/or I'd like to explore my feelings about Bush-era politics.

I'd like a Steve who doesn't want to be in the future in the beginning and can also be kind of an asshole.

I'd like Tony with the flamboyance turned up to eleven.

I'd like to write Tony drinking without it being a catastrophe.

Either of them could have some internalized homophobia! Tony is the one who makes homophobic remarks in canon. (Steve just sticks to misogyny, AFAIK. But they are, as we know, often correlated.)

I'd like to write Steve and Tony maybe not warming to each other with the Love At First Sight 616 thing but clearly becoming really good friends.

I want to set a fic in a universe where Steve and Tony have actually never seriously hurt each other. There's no Civil War in Ults! I mean, there is, but it's an actual civil war, like, Texas secedes and has nukes. This is what Ults is like.

Reasons I Might Set Fic In Something Else Like Marvel Adventures

I like the characters from 616 and I'd like to use versions of them that are close to 616 but I don't want anything to be all that fraught -- I want them to be friends but not have History.

This holds true for the villains, too. Like, maybe I want to write a Batroc story and not deal with all the canonical baggage and the time he stole Steve's shield and the thing with the prostitutes and just have a guy who kicks people.

I want a story that really focuses on overall team dynamics and banter.

I want to write something really really lighthearted.

All the other popular comics settings I can think of tend to be period (1872, Noir, Bullet Points) and I feel like you'd know if you wanted fic there.

[plotdesigner]

Hey Gene :) Come from my Inkstone 1: What inspired you to write the fic this way?2: What scene did you first put down? and for DMP... 3: What’s your favorite line of narration? 9: Were there any alternate versions of this fic?10: Why did you choose this pairing for this particular story?

Come From My Inkstone:

1: What inspired you to write the fic this way?

So, the original fic that inspired Inkstone is The Yiling Patriarch’s Harem Drama by robinthelabyrinth, which is a wacky comedy where NHS writes porn to fundraise for the Burial Mounds, and shenanigans ensue as the gang reacts to fan response. After I got the go ahead to write an adaption of it, the original plan was to alternate between fluffy shenanigans with matchmaking and excerpts from Nie Huiasang’s stories, all heavily flavored by the opinions and political agendas of the Burial Mounds crew. (Jiang Cheng stars in a propaganda style war story as an overture of peace and WWX bragging about his brother, Jin Zixuan gets a story about how he’s much cooler than his dad so please help us, highly romanticized flirtering between NHS, WN, LWJ and WWX, etc) it’d end with political (but also romantic) marriages for everyone and a tentative peace, happy ending, etc.

Unfortunately I have this condition where everything I write turns into a political drama or food porn, and the Burial Mounds don’t have any food, so. Things got more serious than I intended, and trying to track down all the political ramifications for things - and also the amount of fun I was having with the goofy bits - means that the fic’s outline has expanded a lot xD  Also I have all these Nie brothers feelings and they ended up bursting out here

2: What scene did you first put down?

NHS and NMJ’s argument over NHS’s drinking and NHS’s subsequent snit, the first scene of the fic! I tend to write in chronological order, and I didn’t have a super strong idea of what to write, but -

Ok, tangent. When fanwriters talk about muses, there’s usually jokes about the characters kicking the door down and yelling in someone’s head, right? But in general, (or maybe just for me?), it’s more of an intuitive feeling about what a character would do or say. It’s a metaphorical yelling.

So I sat down, not exactly sure of what to write, and was suddenly possessed with the notion that I had to start with the Nies having an argument because there would be no NHS fic without an NMJ to go with him!

Dead Men’s Party:

  3: What’s your favorite line of narration?

this is hard, DMP is a very long story xD But “Lexaus had hair the color of a brick and shaped like many little bricks” is a line I’m fond of, in part because one of my friends keeps on riffing off it with me!

9: Were there any alternate versions of this fic?

The first several years of writing DMP were with the intention that it would be mostly canon compliant, and would involve a finale where Luxord and Facilier turn into a Nobody and Heartless boss duo due to the endings of KH2 and PatF respectively, and Kairi and Tiana would have to use the power of friendship and also Kairi’s big keyblade to help them return to normal and and chill out.

KH3...radically changed the direction of the fic and the canon compliance of it. [shoves the Luxord is a KHUX implications in a corner. none of this goodbye] Things haven’t diverged yet but we’ll be going canon divergent by the end of Days!

10: Why did you choose this pairing for this particular story?

So! When Princess and the Frog came out in like...2009, I went, I saw, I really enjoyed it, but didn’t think too hard on it - until a couple months later, messing around on a disney kink meme and finding a prompt that was approximately

“Facilier has some legitimate grievances and has gone through some shit - can someone get this man a happier ending and a boyfriend?”

and like, yes. yes he should, actually. but who would be a sufficient boyfriend? they’d need similar interests, of course, gambling and divination, probably another antagonist (but a lovable one), someone from a disney franchise - hey, weren’t those shadow monsters in the movie like the Shadow heartless in kingdom hearts? isn’t there KH villain who fits the bill?

Which is to say that Luxord is Facilier’s manic pixie dream boyfriend! 

[moscarific]

Yuletide Letter 2019!

Dear Holiday Hero,

It's Yuletide time again, and I'm happy you're here on this journey with me, you beautiful stranger! I’m a gold star Yuletide participant: I’ve signed up every year, and written at least one story every year, since the challenge began. That’s great news for you, because over the years, I’ve learned that the best Yuletide gifts are the ones that weren’t quite what I had expected, and also that gifts are satisfying and joyful for me as long as it’s clear that the author put effort and care into them. Basically, as long as you avoid my Do Not Wants and run spellcheck, I’m going to be over the moon with excitement at whatever you write for me.

My biggest non-obvious DNW is babyfic. No pregnancy, no babies, no little kids. I’m also a grumpy Jew, so I’d prefer not to receive stories with strong Christmas themes. The “five things” format is not my favorite. Please don't center your story around ships that I did not ask for.

But I like a lot more things than I dislike! Unless the Yulegoat arrives late, I’ll be reading this on the train to Chinatown for my traditional family dim sum, so please do make me laugh out loud on the L. Or make me uncomfortably aroused on the L. (Porn is optional, obviously, but: oral sex, eroticized hands, exhibitionism, shower sex, gender play.) I like experimental structures and styles, as well as more standard ones, and I am fine with whatever POV and tense you choose. If you are the kind of person who does multimedia or interactive fiction, or just clever footnotes, I am all for that. All of my requests this year have strong and distinct voices, and I would love to receive a story that embraces their sound and feel. I like stories that stick close to canon or present interesting "what if" canon divergences, and I also like superhero and In Space AUs. When I've provided gen options, I promise I want those just as much as the ships - they're not just "gen outs," but stories I very much want to read.

I tend to write the fic I want to see in the world, so you’ll get a good sense of me by browsing my AO3 account. My AO3 bookmarks are a recs list, and therefore a great way to see what kinds of fic appeal to me and make me happy.

Here are the individual requests from my sign-up, with a little more detail added here and there. I've divided each request into three sections: things I do not want, things I very much want, and ideas for things I'd love to read in the fandom.

Wayfarers Series - Becky Chambers: Rosemary Harper, Sissix Seshkethet, Dr. Chef

Do not want:

Shipping Rosemary or Sissix with people other than each other, death of characters who are not dead in canon.

Very much want: To read fic set in this universe! I ship Rosemary/Sissix very hard and would love some hot cross-species femslash porn. Canon-consistent depictions of humans as weird aliens. Worldbuilding.

Ideas: I will be equally happy with sexy shippy fic about Rosemary and Sissix (with a line or two for Dr. Chef), or with fic centered around Dr. Chef that puts the other two requested characters in smaller roles. Or a story with all three of them having an adventure or solving a problem together! I love the xenophilia aspects of Rosemary and Sissix's relationship, so explore Sissix's affection for, or exasperation with, Rosemary's alienness. Show Rosemary bringing Sissix into an aspect of human culture that Sissix hadn’t encountered before - perhaps something uniquely Martian - or take us on a more in-depth tour of Aandrisk culture. Alternatively, write me a story focused on Dr. Chef: give me more insight into his earlier life, or send him on a culinary adventure. I’ve read all three novels, so references or character cameos are fine. This is a fandom where it's okay to make me sad, and where I'd prefer a touch of angst, hardship, or grief to lighthearted fluff.

Delicious World (Video Game): Frank Truffaut, Felix "Monet" Wilson

Do not want:

Fic centered around Emily/Patrick or Emily/Jean-Paul (background mentions are okay if you must). AUs outside the general setting or premise of canon (so, like, no In Space for this one).

Very much want: Sappy, shippy, porny Frank/Monet fic. Competence kink. Loving and detailed descriptions of food and cooking. For people who do not play this kind of game to watch the cut scenes on YouTube - you can pick up the canon in a couple of hours.

Ideas: Is there anything more Yuletide than nominating the casual time-management game I play on my phone? Especially since this one blew my mind with its sweet, believable m/m romance. Please give me the AU where they stay together and make their relationship work while the contest continues, or the one where they encounter each other again after the contest ends and get back together. Mostly, I am sad that the game narrative has split them up and want them to be together making crepes forever. I'd be more than content with domestic fluff, just to spend more time with Frank and Monet's relationship. Or go the other direction and give them more plot than canon would: send them on the run from an underground restaurant crime cabal, or have Frank save Monet from deranged paparazzi. Send them to parts of the world that the game hasn’t traveled to yet - it’s mostly been North America and Europe so far.  I very much enjoy the best friendship between Frank and Emily, and would be happy to see her play sidekick to Frank for once. 

For the People (TV 2018): Jay Simmons, Seth Oliver, Tina Krissman

Do not want:

If you write Jay/Seth, then I DNW fic set before Jay and Seth were roommates, or focus on their prior romantic relationships. For RL/job related reasons, court cases related to the US education system, both because they will make me sad and because I will not be able to turn off my nitpick brain.

Very much want: Romantic and/or angsty roommates-to-lovers Jay/Seth. A fun role for Tina, whether she's the protagonist or just gets a few choice lines in. Well-researched, plausible legal scenarios as plot. Love letters to New York City.

Ideas: There are two ways to go with this that would make me equally happy. The first is Tina character building, because she is one of my television heroes and never had enough to do on the show. "This Is America" is my favorite episode of the series, and anything in that vein, with Tina as the hero, would please me to no end. I'm an angry American progressive, so feel free to engage with my politics (or not, if that's uncomfortable/unfamiliar). Backstory would also be great, especially if it's Young Tina Saves the World. Talk about race, gender, and immigration. Let her be the soothing, fearless mouthpiece about the scary stuff. Or just send her on a relaxing vacation, "Captain's Holiday" style.

The other way to go is to give me Jay/Seth romance and/or porn. They're roommates and adversaries who are clearly also boyfriends. And now the show is canceled, so we can pretend that's where the showrunners were going with it! Jay's parents canonically love Seth, and I would enjoy a sweet story about Seth's growing relationship with them, and Jay's mixed feelings about it. Or give me a court case where they're directly opposing each other, especially one they're both passionate and both kind of right about. If you want, tell some or all of the story from Tina's POV, or do an epistolary/"found documents" structure.

Crooked Media RPF: Ira Madison III, Louis Virtel

Do not want:

For RL/job related reasons, centering stories around political discussion related to the US education system. Major roles for Crooked-Media-adjacent people, such as spouses, who are not public figures (mentions are fine). Stories formatted as a script or transcript of a podcast.

Very much want: Silly, sexy Ira/Louis with a friends-to-lovers or frenemies-to-lovers vibe. Canon-consistent engagement with progressive US politics.

Ideas: Oh, just write me something fun, and I'll love it. Tell about the wacky or apocalyptic event that makes these two cross the line into sex/romance. Or show them in a secret long-term relationship and tell about the wacky or apocalyptic event that makes them go public. Show how they're adjusting to Aida, or tell it from her POV and show how she's adjusting to their relationship (or non-relationship that turns into a relationship, or long history of FWB hookups). Show what happens when they land the Beyonce interview of their dreams. Or throw them into a fandom trope (sharing a bed? sex pollen? aliens made them do it?) and have them respond with their signature wit.

[infinityasph]

so... this idea won’t go away so imma leave it here...

so a weird thought that’s been bugging me for the past few nights: dino charge au based on the legendary “all or nothing / pots and pans” post that i can’t find, but i know exists on this site ( if i find it, i will link it here so i may give proper credit ). 

shelby and riley are the embodiment of pan / ace solidarity from “all or nothing” who live across from stoner / bisexual chase randall and his roommate, the pansexual tyler navarro, from “pots and pans.” the four of them often get together once a week and have dinner parties ( including: chase offering weed to everyone & them politely refusing, tyler & shelby pining after each other, chase & riley giving each other small kisses, tyler inevitably leading chase back to their apartment after one too many joints, shelby complaining about how she doubts tyler notices the hints she’s dropping & riley telling her that tyler is probably just as scared to tell her as she is to tell him once they get back to the apartment, & other wacky hijinks ).

they also have big get-togethers once a month with the rest of their apartment complex. the other residents are: the polyam couple whose apartment looks like atlantis of ivan / phillip / koda from ‘poly-mers,’ the hermit crab inhabiting a human body heckyl and all his pets from ‘shut-in,’ & their biromantic-demisexual landlord kendall morgan who’s always tired & everyone’s pretty sure is a mad scientist from ‘bientist.’ sometimes family members will drop in on these days, which just adds to the fun.

for bonus points: it’s all set up like separate reality tv shows & creates one big fic universe.

“cast” & series list:

shelby watkins -- pansexual from “all or nothing” who tries her best to keep a leash on her emotions & who’s lowkey in love with tyler from “pots & pans”

riley griffin -- homoromantic-asexual from “all or nothing” who is the drummer for a local band & who’s in a relationship with chase from “pots and pans”

tyler navarro -- the pansexual from “pots & pans” who keeps a hold on his roommate & is lowkey in love with shelby from “all or nothing”

chase randall -- the new zealander bisexual stoner from “pots & pans” who gets into hijinks & is in a relationship with riley from “all or nothing”

kendall morgan -- the biromantic-demisexual scientist who owns the whole complex & who took in most of the residents when they had nowhere else to go from ‘bientist’

koda cavski -- the sweet & gentle bisexual who was once a wrestling champion & who was the one to suggest to atlantis theme-d apartment from “poly-mers”

ivan xander -- the homosexual nerd who plays dnd on the weekends & who acts as the level head for most of the complex from “poly-mers”

prince phillip iii of zander -- the nonbianary prince of zander who moved to the us to be closer to their loves koda & ivan who also star in “poly-mers”

heckyl -- the ‘idk about labels’ transman who works from home & who pranks the other residents on a regular basis from “shut-in”

the monsters & crew from sledge’s ship -- the pets that the heckyl from “shut-in” lives with

[thelightofthingshopedfor]

2018 post because I still want to and it’s on my to-do list

I'm sure at this point no one but me cares considering we're fully two months into 2019 but whatever, I want to record it for posterity, because there were a lot of things in 2018 that I did for the first time and that's kind of important. (”this will be brief!” I said, you know, like a liar.)

I finally got a tattoo. I've been talking about it for years but never figured out exactly what I wanted or where, and even once I figured out what I wanted ("all we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us," which has been important to me in different ways for years) I didn't know exactly how I wanted it to look, because it can be tough to make text tattoos look good and I’m not an artist or a graphic designer. and then Scully was diagnosed with kidney disease and I realized, oh yeah, his paw print, there's an obvious one. my tiny little semi-colon (of which I apparently never took a decent picture) was also pretty obvious once I started looking for something small I could do as a test tattoo, although the way things worked out I got them both at the same time. the whole process was...kind of odd? but instead of just talking about it I finally actually made it happen, and it hurt but not, like, unbearably, and now I have a piece of my furry little boy that goes everywhere with me, which was especially important after he died.  

I did way more political volunteering than I ever have before. I always feel like I'm not doing enough and compared to people who volunteered with campaigns every single day, I guess I'm not, but I still did a lot in 2018 compared to any previous year: lots of donations to multiple Democrat candidates and progressive organizations, textbanking for several candidates across the US, sign-waving and even phonebanking for the Alaska Democrats, poll watching on election night for the Alaska Democrats, at least a few hundred handwritten postcards to voters for a few more candidates, data entry for the campaign against a local bathroom bill last spring (I keep forgetting that happened in 2018 too because, you know, 2018 was about a decade long), going to several local anti-Kavanaugh demonstrations and the like, leaving lots of voicemails for my legislators and bugging other people to do the same (with varying levels of success), and maybe other stuff I'm forgetting. which is all good, because actually doing shit is vastly preferable to just going "wow everything is terrible and we're all gonna die" both in terms of actual impact and my mental health. the unfortunate part is that after doing as much as I did for the 2018 midterms--whether or not I really actually did enough, whatever "enough" might be--I got pretty well burned out, especially because...all the candidates I did the most work for DID NOT WIN so that made it feel kinda pointless (even though we took back the House and I was so relieved about that I could’ve cried). especially locally where Alaskans did the stupid thing and 1) kept Don Young and 2) elected a Trump wannabe with almost no experience as our governor because he made promises that any idiot should've been able to see he wouldn't be able to keep. but...I still worked hard for causes and people I care about, and I devoted a pretty significant amount of time and money, and I got out of my comfort zone with last-weekend phonebanking, and none of that is nothing.

I joined a gym and started going there fairly regularly. as usual I want to qualify this, because "30 minutes on the elliptical once or twice a week" is not exactly an amazing workout, and I haven't been as good at going regularly since I finished TAZ: Balance, but like...it's still a new thing that I went out of my way to do, and it was a positive change toward taking care of myself physically.

related: I...finished a podcast? I'm bad at podcasts (see also: I'm two or three years behind on Welcome to Night Vale, the only other podcast where I've listened to more than one or two episodes), but the Balance arc of The Adventure Zone is amazing and it basically let me trick myself into wanting to work out so I could listen to more. (unfortunately, Amnesty and MBMBAM haven't been as effective this way, I think because MBMBAM is hilarious but there's no narrative and therefore no "oh shit what's gonna happen next" suspense, and Amnesty is great but it's just...less zany, I guess. constant zany goofs are great for distracting me from the fact that I'm doing generally unpleasant physical activity.) now maybe if I could find a site like GoodReads for podcasts, which apparently doesn’t exist yet, maybe I’d do better at remembering and then listening to all the podcasts I’ve heard of that interest me...although I still don’t know what would be useful for workouts to give me that all-important combo of zany goofs (made by people who are not horrible) and suspenseful narrative. 

I got back into conventions and cosplay for the first time in six years, which is kind of dumb because I was never that deep into cosplay in the first place and I'm still not, and the vast majority of cons I've attended have been tiny local ones...but I did do several attempts at varying levels of quality starting back in college, and I put together some complicated-by-my-standards outfits for SDCC 2012, and then I didn't do any cosplay at all until last year when I semi-spontaneously decided to go to ECCC. I only did two for that one (AoU Wanda, and Avengers Academy Loki) but they involved more actual work than any previous cosplays and I was pretty proud of how they turned out. and then I kind of went "oh hey, cons and cosplay are fun, I forgot", so I did a very simple cosplay for one tiny local con and two that were much more complicated (Stuttgart Loki and The Final Pam) for our larger local con, and it was a lot of work and I'm not 100% happy with how I looked as Pam but the handful of people thrilled to recognize me made it worthwhile. also my Loki staff is damned cool and I look great in suits.

I got contacts! for the very first time! LITERALLY JUST FOR COSPLAY! I've worn glasses since I was about two so I don't remember my adjustment period and I've never had much desire to try contacts, and with past cosplays I just kind of shrugged and wore my glasses anyway, but after ECCC I wanted to Do It Right so...I got contacts. it kind of sucked actually! after the week or so where I was supposed to wear them to get used to them, I literally have not worn them except for the local convention! it turns out contacts will never be a great idea for me because astigmatism is wacky! but now I have contacts I can use for future cosplays, and it's another new thing outside my comfort zone where I went "you know, actually, I could do this thing" and then I made it happen, which is...sort of a big deal for me.

I played Silent Hill 3 and 2, in that order, which is not that big of a deal but still feels like something of a milestone for me, because a) actually finishing a game is embarrassingly rare for me and b) I feel like...they're so well known and such a part of gaming canon, so to speak, that finally playing a couple classic games I previously only knew by osmosis is sort of significant actually. also I love them both in different ways, and discovering a new favorite game series is always fun.

I said goodbye to Scully. this was...not a fun one, obviously, and in fact those last few days were completely fucking awful. but, well, it was a big thing that happened, and it was new in my experience. like I said (a lot) at the time, I realize it's a sign of how lucky I've been that Scully was my hardest personal loss so far, but that doesn't change the fact that it was, and...of course it was hard and horrible. he was my furry little boy, he was unquestionably family, he was a huge part of my life every day for 9 years.  I took care of him as well as I could for as long as I could, and then I made the most compassionate decision I could, and for the most part I was able to focus on remembering the joy he brought me instead of just how much it hurt to lose him. (I've also said this before but I think dealing with Loki in Infinity War helped with Scully, because I'd already done some work on my unhealthy tendencies toward hopelessness in the face of, you know, things ending.) and then I found Hazy, and that's been hard in different ways but she's also worth it, and I think I can train her enough that other people will actually get to see how silly and adorable and sweet she is instead of just BARK BARK BARK.

I more or less kept up with my writing goals of posting at least one new thing a month? I guess this is an accomplishment rather than a first, since it's something I've been mostly successful in doing for the last few years, but it's still notable. also it does involve a first, because until I will kiss you till your breath is found I'd never written anything even semi-explicit (well, I very vaguely described a couple sex scenes in my Crimson Peak fic a few years ago but that was...VERY vague) and then I wrote several thousand words of fucked-up dubcon sort-of-p0rn and fairly shortly followed it up with another one. so that's a thing I've done now I guess. (is it actually explicit if you never really, directly reference anyone's genitals but it's still obvious what's happening and also it's fucked-up sex stuff? I don't know but at this point I'm definitely still too squeamish to use certain words in my fics. is that because I'm hella ace or because I grew up hella repressed in purity culture? BOTH PROBABLY)

and then there are my goals for 2019! or rather the rest of 2019 but it's cool because I got started on a couple of these pretty much right away!

cut my hair real short. already done! in fact this was basically the first thing I did in 2019, because I made the appointment Jan. 1 and got my hair cut Jan. 2! kind of like the tattoo, this is something I've been wanting to do, and talking about wanting to do, for ages and I've never actually gone for it; the shortest I've gotten my hair cut was basically chin-length, more than once, because I'd go in like "I kind of really want a pixie cut or something similar but idk if that would work on me without adding a bunch of time and Product to my morning routine so maybe I shouldn't?" and the stylists were always like "yeah you shouldn't, a good pixie for your face shape is not wash-and-wear hair" so I never did it even though I kept wanting to just...cut all my fucking hair off. and then this December I kind of went, wait, I got a TATTOO with less angst than this and that's permanent. I CAN CUT MY HAIR. IT GROWS BACK. so I got all my fucking hair cut off. it's not perfect because a short cut really does take more maintenance, from what I'm told (I got it cut the first week of January, so...probably I should have scheduled a trim by now), and I really would prefer to continue paying almost no attention to my hair while still looking generally okay, and the bits in front fall in my eyes and piss me off if I don't pin them back (I did buy the hair wax stuff the stylist suggested that was supposed to sort of lightly anchor it in place but it just never worked for very long, so...pins), BUT it is very nice not constantly catching my hair in my purse strap and stuff like that, and also I'm more visibly queer with short hair and that's definitely a plus.

train Hazy. this is a work in progress. it took a while to get signed up for an actual class and then I had to go with one for reactive dogs specifically, and so far I've only been to two sessions, just one of which involved Hazy, and then I've been trying to do other stuff at home, and...well, it's a work in progress. but she's a good dog who just needs to learn to chill a little bit, and I should've trained Scully and didn't so I'm trying to do things right this time.

specifically, I would like to get her trained enough that she can accompany me to Pride in June, wearing her adorable Wonder Woman harness and cape. given that she is not great with individual strange humans and strange dogs, taking her into a big crowd of both would definitely result in a screaming meltdown if I did it now and it may or may not be realistic to hope I'll be able to get enough improvement on that in time. but that's the goal. if it doesn't work, there's always next year, I guess.

also, I want to make myself a flying ace costume for Pride. this may or may not be much more complicated than I anticipate.

speaking of costumes, I'm planning to go back to both local conventions this year, and I imagine I'll reuse my Stuttgart Loki outfit at least once but it would be nice to do at least one other new cosplay. Heather/Cheryl from Silent Hill 3 seems like it should be straightforward but Value Village hasn't provided me with any of the pieces yet so who knows.

post more to @alaska-gothic​ because I have a bunch of cool photos I'd like to have a place to show off (and I've taken a lot of new pictures, some in VERY cold weather, for this exact purpose)

finish more games. in practice this might turn into "play more short games while continuing to neglect long games" but I want to make my list of completed games longer and I also want to PLAY MORE GAMES in general because it's a thing I really like, and it's possibly the only thing I do that's purely for my own enjoyment, and I want to make more time for that. also I want to finish SWTOR’s existing singleplayer content because, I mean, it’s an eight-year-old(!!!) MMO so its remaining time is probably limited by default and it’s fucking ridiculous I’ve been a subscriber for at least seven years without even finishing all the class storylines, what the actual fuck Past Me. (I also want to make more time for console games specifically, because those are almost definitely easier on my body and I can do them while cuddling with Hazy on the couch. unfortunately this also generally requires me having the place to myself, which is kind of a rare thing that is also necessary for comfortably working on customs or writing, so...opportunities are limited.)

speaking of games: finish buying the parts to upgrade my computer and then upgrade my fucking computer, and also back up my fucking files

finish a long fic? or honestly if I can even finish more short fics that would be great. really just...make progress on the WIP list. especially if I can finish some IW-specific fics before Endgame comes out. that would be super cool of me.

get another tattoo. I still want that LotR quote but I don't know how I want it to look so who knows when that might happen. HOWEVER, I've been wanting something queer, and I very much loved Foxflight Studios’ "we fight as one" design, and when I asked the designer if she was okay with me getting it as a tattoo she said yes. so at least with that I wouldn't have to figure out a design. I do of course have to figure out a) where I want it (ideally, somewhere normally covered by clothes but where I can see it if I want to, and where a person might conceivably keep a real dagger) and b) how much more it's going to hurt/cost than the paw print considering it would have to be bigger and it has a lot more colors and linework.

do some travel around Alaska. I've lived here for nearly my entire life and I really haven't seen that much of my own state. more importantly there are a few extremely cool places within theoretical driving distance, like Kennicott, Igloo City, and abandoned military installations near Seward, and I want to visit them. @erlkonigstochter and I had vague plans to do this last year and it never materialized (although I did visit Nike Site Summit on my own), so...this year I intend to try harder to make that happen, especially since I have no current plans of traveling out of state.

put more stuff on Etsy (and figure out how to advertise them?). in particular there are a bunch more things I want to repaint in various Pride colors, in part because those are way easier than custom Funko figures. of course, a lot of these things are kinda technically copyright infringement which means somehow I have to figure out how to make more sales of the easier things without drawing the attention of any corporations (and/or shift my focus to things that aren't under copyright of some kind but that's probably more complicated).

but also do more personal projects. I have so many partially finished custom figures, and so many other figures I bought specifically to customize but haven't touched since, and it would be cool to actually...do something with some of those. especially because several of my WIPs/plans are more Lokis, and I need all the Lokis, and there are not many more left that I can buy.

figure out how to motivate myself to work out more and keep up with PT exercises, see above re: needing a  better replacement for the magic of TAZ Balance whoops

get a therapist and work on ADHD issues, because I'm increasingly convinced that ADHD issues are at the root of the vast majority of my other issues (depression, anxiety, etc.), and that I would be immeasurably improving every aspect of my life if I could make some progress on that aspect. the difficulty, of course, is that finding a therapist is kind of complicated and difficult, and also I don't really want to add yet another regular appointment to my schedule when I already don't have enough time after work to do all the things I want and/or need to do, but...this one thing could go a long way toward helping me actually do all those other things, so obviously this is a time investment I really need to make. although probably not until I've made serious progress with Hazy's separation anxiety because that also makes it hard to go places after work. so uh, I guess we'll see. in the meantime it might be smart if I tried to figure out some kind of self-guided therapy thing I could do. I'm sure there's...something.

just, like, be more intentional about...things. in general. this is a bad goal because it's very nonspecific but it is slightly more specific than "generally do better FFS" so at least there's that.

[magpiefngrl]

i can never just ask one question, so here's a bunch: 2, 5, 9, 14, 22, 31/32, 33, 37, and 45 :D

Hi, sweetie! 

2. Favorite part of writing.

Although drafting (when you’re in the flow and words come out with ease) is a close favourite, I think I’d say that the last part of revisions is my fave: changing a word or phrase that makes the dialogue snappier or a feeling more intense. Adding a sentence to clarify something. Cutting – cutting is very important and when I remove a redundant phrase, the text becomes tighter and lighter at the same time.

I see it as embroidery: I’ve sewn the dress (wrote the fic) and now I’m making it pretty. 

5. Books or authors that influenced your style the most.

I’d say Zyranna Zateli (Greek) is one. Maggie Stiefvater is definitely an influence and (prob not obvious but I’m so inspired by her) Angela Carter.

9. Least favorite trope to write.

Coffee shop AU and kidfic.

14. What’s the most research you ever put into a book?

I can’t quantify it, but I do a LOT of research. I’ll research the types of birds in X area even for a 1.5k ficlet. If I had to pick a fic, I’d say The Miseducation of Draco Malfoy because I even researched the cover of the March 1998 UK Cosmopolitan. I don’t even want to think what a novel will be like.22. How many drafts do you need until you’re satisfied and a project is ultimately done for you?

I don’t really do drafts as I edit as I go along, but typically I end up having edited the first half a million times and the second half much fewer times.

31. Hardest character to write.

Luna Lovegood. I love her, but I don’t think I can do her wackiness justice. 

32. Easiest character to write.

Draco Malfoy, because emotional constipation is something we have in common.

33. Do you listen to music when you’re writing?

Nope. I need to write in silence. I often read aloud as I’m editing. But music is very important before a writing session to put me in the mood. I find that I can write a fic much more easily when I’ve found the song for it. It’s like I’ve unlocked the mood.

45. Worst piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten.

After a MOOC, I joined a forums of writers who shared work for critique. I left a slightly negative one for someone (I think I was polite about it, though?) and their feedback on my story was scathing: the idea “was nice but the execution wasn’t” and “the twist was hard to believe” or something along those lines. A couple of other people left very glowing reviews with some criticism, sure, but they actually praised the twist lol. The best kind of critiques I’ve received hurt, but after a while I realised they were right; and they always touched on things I wasn’t sure about. That particular feedback felt like retaliation. I could be wrong, though.

❤❤Thank you for this, my lovely Chi  ❤❤

New Asks For Writers