#I just need one person to become unhealthily obsessed with me

[william-teddy-grahams]

Hannibal NBC gave us unrealistic expectations.

Will got himself a hot rich boyfriend by being an unsocial weirdo with seven dogs and mental health issues.

I’m an unsocial weirdo with 27 houseplants and mental health issues, but I’m still alone. Why isn’t anyone showing up with breakfast for me? Framing me for their crimes? Drawing gay fanart of us? I’m clearly prime material for it.

Lies spread by the media.

[claiestve]

𝐈 𝐖𝐚𝐬 𝐍𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 ꨄ Xanthus

˜”* ❝𝙄 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡 𝙢𝙮 𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙙 𝙞𝙨 𝙨𝙡𝙤𝙬𝙡𝙮 𝙛𝙖𝙙𝙞𝙣'❞

⎯⎯ ୨ ୧ ⎯⎯

ꜱʏɴᴏᴘꜱɪꜱ: ᴛʜᴇ ɴᴇxᴛ ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ.

⎯୨⎯ " " ⎯୧⎯

“Are you sure you want to do this?”

It’s okay, breathe. It’s for the better. It is for the better, right? Right? 

“By agreeing to this, you are agreeing to give up the memories of this person. Do you wish to proceed?”

If all of the pain just went away, that’d be amazing. Maybe this is what you need—the last step. 

“Ahem,” You cleared your throat, “Yes, I wish to proceed.” This was good. This means no more sleepless nights. No more being terrified like that day. 

After the battle, you couldn’t remain with Xanthus. He became unhealthily obsessive and toxic. You knew it wasn’t intentional but fuck did it hurt. You saw through it, he was terrified of something happening to you. He was much more jumpy than before. He’d flinch at loud noises. You found it strange that out of his four hundred-something years, he wouldn’t be so affected by this. However, you’re his love and the thought of losing you forever affected him terribly. 

When the two of you addressed it, you concluded that you’d have to love from a distance. Seeing him like that broke you and he was hurting seeing you constantly nervous to live your life. Although he’d want you for eternity, whatever you want or need, he’ll make sure you get. So it was final. 

However, that didn’t stop you from thinking about it. Even with your new place in the city that never sleeps, you couldn’t get him off your mind. It got worse when you’d go to sleep. All you could think about was the battle and the crazy look in Xanthus’ eyes when he was fighting for your life. You told him you’d never be scared of him but you couldn’t help but be scared. It was all too much. 

One day, you went to your last resort. You knew it was an option the whole time but didn’t want to go to it. However, at this rate, you had to. You had to have your memory of Xanthus and that world erased. You were hesitant at first but you knew this was right. 

Right?

“Is this too tight?” The woman asked as she put the weird contraption on your head. It was glowy and you looked like some sort of alien. It was a bit tight but nothing that would bother you. 

“No, it’s just fine.” 

“Alright, just lay back. You brought many sentiments so this might take a while. If you need us to stop, let us know.” 

That left you nervous. Why would you need them to stop? What could happen?

You closed your eyes with an open mind. Nothing was happening yet. It just felt like you were laying back and resting. That’s where it starts though. Your brain started to throb. 

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

“I bought something for you. I had planned to give it to you another day but there’s no time like the present.”

“Oh? What is it?”

“I saw this bracelet and thought of you.”

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

You peeked your eyes open to see that same bracelet being removed from your wrist. You wanted to snatch it back but no matter how hard you tried, your body couldn’t move. All you could do was lay back and close your eyes. 

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

“You showed me what I had missed.”

“Really?”

“Mhm, the list is endless. Um, a willingness to fight the innocence of love, the warmth of sentiment, the necessity of respite, purpose of living.”

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

You thought back to the apartment you two were sitting in. Whose was it again? The name wasn’t quite clicking anymore. At all, actually. Your memories started to become a blur and soon enough, you felt it. Your throat getting tighter, your breath shortening, your body shaking. 

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

“Something’s… wrong.” 

“What? What is it?”

“I don’t know… I just have a feeling.”

“For yourself?”

“No.”

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

You gasped, suddenly your lungs opened back up and your throat loosened. Your gaze quickly turns back and forth as you try to get a hold of someone to help you. 

“What’s wrong?” A woman approaches you while reaching for your hand. 

You look into her eyes waiting for your voice to vocalize your pain but you can’t. All you could do was break down and cry as you thought about… what were you thinking about again? You couldn’t tell why you were panicking so much or what you were crying about anymore. It was all completely dismissed from your mind. 

“This is good!” The woman expresses to her team in the back as they laid you back down on the chair. She hands you a bracelet and waits for a reaction. 

“Are you giving this to me? What is this?” 

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

this is so heavily inspired by eternal sunshine of the spotless mind and also we can't be friends mv (I'm sorry) sooo yeahhhh AHHAHAHHA

also yall im SORRY THIS WAS SO PROCRASTINATED IM GONNA UGH

[waxingrunes]

your art is the most realistic art i have seen this fandom spit out i really wish you would make remus shorter and stop making oc’s

This is why I lose enthusiasm for you cunts.

Sick of defending a fucking drawing, a fictional character. Sick of the same agendas in this online world where Remus has to be this fucking wet mop of a man who has one singular personality trope of being obsessed with Sirius Black and wouldn’t say boo to a goose. Have you met real men? You ever interacted with your average Joe, who is a bit shy, bit awkward, bit of a weirdo but he doesn’t have to come with a pre installed stutter and helpless heart eyes and no other arsenal but a goo goo gaga state of mind for his love interest. You lot are unhealthily obsessed. Daily, fucking, bullshit, daily headcanons, daily this, daily that.

My Remus and Sirius are never going to change. What’s insane is the amount of ‘heteronormative’ claims I see attached to this debacle of height and size. I know a man, who is exceptionally tall, built, has had a boyfriend, and topped him the entire way through the relationship. He did not enjoy bottoming, and yet is a bisexual individual, nothing ‘stereotypical’ homosexual about him or his appearance whatsoever. In fact, he’s very much a Remus variant in my eyes; he is softly natured, introverted, and selective socially and STILL A STONY TOP. Real life, real person, not curated from a thread you found on Twitter and have swallowed up whole.

What happened to coming into a fandom space, making something and going, “that’s hot”. When did it become a space to make sure every representation was ticked, to make sure one character isn’t too this or too that. I’m not here to read the same stories or see the same art 100 times over. I fell in love with these two men and have since had a very solid image of them in my head and create art based off of those ideas. I don’t feel pressured to make sure I give my Remus certain soft traits to justify making him look the way I do. I don’t feel the need to advertise Sirius being this massively charismatic guy just to give him a personality because otherwise you might think he doesn’t have one, because of the slightly more feminine light I draw him in (which is misogynistic you dumb fucks). Just because, I draw my Remus tall and a buffed out lank, does not make him an ultra turbo Alpha. Just because I draw my Sirius smaller, does not mean he is a helpless twink. But here’s the secret nobody’s telling you— even if I did draw them like that, even if those were my holy canons and preferences for these boys, that’s okay. I’m here to create things that make me go, “fuck yeah that’s hot”, “hell yeah I want to see Sirius get pulverised by Remus and no I don’t want to see Remus get pulverised by Sirius and no I don’t feel the need to defend that”, “yeah I prefer tough love over easy love”, “absolutely love it when one of them is a dick to the other and there’s heaps of toxic tension, or maybe they’re both like that and they’re both sarcastic pricks that have to work it out”. I’m never going to adhere to the obsession of character moulds you lot have created.

Sick of this space being turned into a political pansy parade. It’s alright if you want to draw this gay couple with any features you want, hyper masculine, hyper feminine, somewhere in the middle, trans, prefer one of them topping, prefer them to be asexual, prefer them to be toxic and have grit (that’s my trope), or just want easy fluff. And it’s also alright if you’re just in fandom because you’re a bit perverted (like me) and wanted to explore that in a couple you found super fucking hot. Don’t let people use the word fetishise, don’t let people use the word heteronormative, don’t let people bamboozle you with big words and reams of bullet points to incite shame, don’t let people box you in, just keep watching the porn, keep consuming the porn, keep avoiding the shit you want to avoid, and enjoy what you want without shame.

[flwersgarden]

I’ve become unhealthily obsessed with your fics!! Could you do an Austin!elvis yandere with a reader who’s a bit slow and he takes advantage of it. Maybe an angsts scene where he protects her from the Colonel?? Totally understand if you don’t feel comfortable doing it!

🤍🤍🤍

note: sorry for taking so long :( but i loved this idea, i think I loved it too much as i wrote a bunch of things for it- anyways, hope you like it, darling!

elvis met you while he was in germany.

in one of those moments he needed the support of an angel like you.

your father was part of the important people in the army at the time so it was inevitable, you'd have to be in various places with him since your mother was busy in household matters and you had school.

you were confused at your father's grumpy face while taking you with him to meet elvis. he seemed so kind, such a gentleman, a good person overall.

“ nice to meet you, mr. presley. ” you said with a smile.

he returned the smile, shaking your hand. “ believe me, the pleasure is all mine, ms. y/l/n. ”

you didn't noticed the surface of the sentence.

elvis was enamored by you from the first moment he saw you.

he didn't even paid any attention to the beaulieu family when they introduced themselves, subtly watching you leave, smiling at your father when he looked at you. oh, what a good girl you were.

️️ ️️️️️

next time he saw you was at one of those parties they throw whenever they had the chance.

on the other hand, you thought you were at a business meeting. your father told you so. but it confused you why he was laughing and drinking in a business meeting.

elvis loved your adorable face, the way your nose scrunches and look like a deer caught in highlights make his heart jump, you were just so cute to resist. and your father left you alone. in the lion's den.

“ hi. ” he, as always softly said scared that if he raised his voice a bit higher it would scare you off, said, smiling at you.

“ hi! ” you smiled at him, looking at the crowd of people. “ you enjoying the business meeting? ” you asked.

elvis chuckled. “ business meeting? ”

“ yes! ” you nodded, quite excited. “ my dad told me. ” you said as if that was such an important thing to know.

elvis raised his eyebrows, catching your father's game. “ oh, yeah. actually, ” he left his cup of beer in the table next to the both of you, a radio next to it playing some awful songs. “ he asked me to accompany you. would you mind? ”

he showed you his arm which you took with your usual smile, letting him take you to his room. ignoring the whistles that came from some other boys.

elvis didn't closed the door when the both of you arrived, he didn't want any rumors tonight.

“ you want some juice? ” elvis asked, already serving you in a cup.

“ yes, thank you. ”

you grabbed the cup, sipping a bit.

“ i heard your father saying you prefer juice over soda so. ” he shrugged, smiling before turning around.

your heart jumped at that simple action, of elvis remembering something so basic about you. and said by someone else!

he sat next to his bed, patting the seat next to him. obediently, you sat.

“ so, how's your life going? ” he asked, eager to hear anything from you.

you took a big gulp out of your juice before answering. “ oh! i saw some musicals last week. my favorite one is singing in the rain, of course. ” you sighed. “ gene kelly is a dream boat. ” your elbow held himself up in elvis' bed, your cheek pressing against the palm of your hand as you looked at the ceiling.

elvis cleared his throat. “ i also star in some movies, y'know. ” he spoke with a sudden stern tone.

your attention went straight at him with that. “ really?! what kind? ”

he smiled, now glad that your attention was in him again. “ the good kind. they're fun. ” he shrugged, standing up and walking in the room. “ i want to do other type of movies though- like james dean! ” he suddenly exclaimed, raising his hands as he turned to see you.

“ james dean? ” you asked, clearly confused.

“ yeah. ” he quietly laughed, thinking how adorable you looked, when an idea occurred to him. “ you can watch some of them with me. ”

you perked up. “ can i? ” you smiled again.

“ yeah. ” he nodded, walking to the record machine he had before crouching in front of it. “ but you have to promise me not to say anything to your ol' folk. ” he puts on some soft music on, a love song probably. you couldn't differentiate them very well, your father doesn't let you listen a lot of music.

“ why not? ” you ask.

he turns around, smiling at your adorable confusion. “ because... it's a surprise. ” he says with a smile. he then stands up, walking to you, extending his arm for you to take his hand. you do that.

“ oh! well, then, i won't say anything. i hate ruining surprises. ” you giggle, finishing the juice elvis gave you.

he squints, shaking his head a bit. “ i've never met someone like you. ”

you smile against your cup, your manicured hand twirling it in an innocent act.

“ is that a compliment? ”

“ it is. ”

️️ ️️️️️️️️️

meanwhile elvis was in the army, you and him wrote to each other a lot. you would hide the letters from your father as elvis would remind you about the surprise he had for him. and you obeyed.

when he got discharged, he sent a letter inviting you to his christmas special saying that he needed some of your help and that he also missed you a lot, he hasn't seen you in years, how could you leave him without your presence so many time? so, you accepted. you gladly accepted.

this time the letter had his house number for you to call him whenever you'd like! isn't he sweet?

“ so, have you seen my movies? ” he asked.

“ yes! ” you nodded your head while giggling. “ they're so cute, i loved them! you're such a great actor too! ” you complimented him making elvis' heart feel warm.

“ thank you, doll. ”

“ you're welcome, elvis. ” you scratch your nose with your free hand as you wait for your nail polish to dry. “ oh, by the way, i wanted to ask you. can you tell me how to get to the set for your special? wanna tell papa how to-. ”

elvis chuckle interrupted you. “ no, baby, the invitation is just for you. ”

you frown, not angry nor dissapointed, confused. “ how am i gonna get there then? ”

“ i'm gonna send jerry, ” you knew him. “ to pick you up, don't worry. ”

“ okay then. i'll tell my dadd-. ”

“ don't tell him anything- haven't we talked about this? ” he sounded frustrated which made you frown in sadness.

“ 'm sorry... ” you whisper.

elvis sighs. “ no baby, i-. ” he sighs again. “ what i meant is that the surprise is not ready yet. we have to wait just a few days and everything will be ready. ” he whispers, making you feel somewhat comforted by that.

“ oh, yeah, right, i'm sorry, i forgot. ”

he then chuckles making you giggle. “ that's why i'm here, aren't i? to remind my forgetful babydoll about everything. ”

you smile, the little nickname he gave you making your heart flutter.

your dad calls your name making you jump a bit. “ oh, elvis, i gotta go. ”

“ sure- remember to call me before going to sleep, 'kay? ”

“ i will, bye! ” you blow him a kiss through the phone waiting for him to say goodbye back before hanging up and almost running to your dad.

️️ ️️️️️️️️️

when you arrive on set you look at everything, quite starstruck, smiling as the christmas decorations lighted everything up. you loved christmas so much you felt you could burst!

“ baby! ”

you turn to the side, elvis taking his sunglasses off as he sees you, some men behind him which get ignored as he ran to you. you did the same, giggling when he engulfed you in a hug.

“ elvis! ” you grabbed his cheeks with your hands, kissing his face; missing the lips as you were too shy to do that.

he breaks the hug only so he could look at you. “ god, how can you look more beautiful than the last time i met you? ”

you felt flustered at the compliment, shrugging. “ perhaps because i grew up- i have my own drivers license! ” you clap, elvis clapping as well with a smile.

“ that's my baby! i'm gonna buy you one of those amazing soft pink cadillacs. ” he whispers, now he is the one grabbing your cheeks, softly as to not break you. your hands rest on his chest.

“ no need, elvis, you know it. ”

“ but i wanna do it. ” he bumps his nose with yours, making a 'pop' sound which makes you giggle.

the moment is cut short as colonel parker bursts into the room.

“ elvis! ”

you turn, the scream startling you as your attention was in elvis' hypnotizing blue eyes and soft deep voice.

elvis scoffs, turning like you. “ what is it? ”

“ you're being missed on set, my boy. ”

colonel parker stops, looking the warm embrace in which elvis has you. his arm now holding your waist while your hands are in your purse's belt, fiddling with the small jewel in the center of it.

“ who's this? ”

elvis smiles as he looks at you, glad that the colonel brings the topic of conversation he loves the most. “ colonel, this is y/n. my girl. ” he kisses your head.

“ nice to meet you, colonel parker. ” you extend your hand, as your dad told you to do with important people.

the colonel looks at it for a good five seconds before shaking it, quite harsh. you just hissed before retreating it.

“ yes, yes.. ” colonel parker just mutters before turning around, walking back to the christmas set-up.

“ bastard. ” you hear elvis mutter.

️️ ️️️️️️️️️

you are now with elvis in his dressing room, colonel parker sitting while you sat across from him. he would sometimes look at you with an emotion you couldn't decipher but, jesus, did it make you feel small and weak.

elvis gets out as the colonel starts arguing with him about the special.

“ you think they liked that? you, with a leather suit, sweating all over the place? ”

“ colonel, i know when i've excited the audience. ” he says as he looks at the colonel through the mirror.

you chuckle as you remember elvis' letter that said the same thing when you asked how did he knew when a show was good, that made colonel parker's attention travel to you.

“ what's funny? ”

you perk up, clearly not noticing how loud you were.

“ i'm sorry, i just remembered something. ”

“ remembered something, huh? ” colonel parker then points at you with his clown cane. “ so you have him this silly idea? ”

“ sorry? ” you ask, frowning again.

“ don't play dumb, young lady. ”

“ hey. ” elvis stern voice makes an appearance.

“ i'm just stating the obvious. tell me, did you said to him that this was a good idea? ” he stands up, making you lean your back further into the chair.

“ colonel, i don't understan-. ”

“ yeah, sure, you do. ” he chuckled, with no humor in it before leaning his face into yours, making you tremble with tears in your eyes. “ you just look at him with those deer eyes and ask him to do whatever you want. ”

“ colonel, enough. ” elvis says as he grabs his soda.

“ tell me how does he repay you in bed? ”

“ HEY! ” elvis screams as he slams his coke in the table at the same time you sob.

both men just look at you.

“ i-i'm really sorry, i just... forgive me. ”

why were you apologizing?

“ the fuck is wrong with you?! ” elvis asks as he walks to you, crouching to your level to coo at you.

“ she knows i'm right, that's why she is cr-. ”

the colonel turns as he speaks. a big mistake. he doesn't see elvis attack.

elvis grabs his sweater, turning him around to punch a blow in his face. colonel parker falling to the floor, his cane next to him.

“ you shut. the fuck. up. ” elvis points at him, his eyes filled with hatred. “ before i make you. ”

you just look at the scene with wide eyes, first time experiencing violence.

“ wh-what?! ” the colonel exclaims, obviously surprised that elvis did that.

“ i'm breaking that fucking contract, steve knows a damn good lawyer which i will hire for you to get out of my life. do not ever disrespect her like that, you son of a bitch. ”

elvis walks to you, grabbing your arm, you just stand up and grab his arm while he walks you out of his dressing room. he doesn't care he is in a robe, he signals jerry to follow him.

meanwhile the colonel coughs, turning his body to the side. the clown on his cane looking right back at him with a big smile and glossy eyes.

️️ ️️️️️️️️️

after the special, elvis broke the contract with the colonel which had to appear in court with a broken lip and a small red spot below his nose. he knew better than to charge elvis for that.

elvis gets under steve's management, which you approved of when elvis asked you about it. you were now used to elvis asking for your opinion on everything.

but it can only take some time before your father starts asking for you.

a knock in graceland interrupts the story you're telling to vernon, which was sipping coffee next to you in the couch, elvis with his arm around your shoulders.

“ i'll get it. ” you kiss elvis cheek before standing up and opening the door. meeting your father's angry face.

“ daddy? ” you ask confused, tilting your head.

“ pack your things. ” he walks into the house with permission, turning to elvis which just looks startled at his sudden presence.

you leave the door open, stepping to the side as you looked at your father who stood in the middle of the room. “ dad, what's going on? ”

“ you took my daughter, you fucking prick! ” your dad says as he points at elvis who stands up.

“ dad! ” you gasp, walking to him.

“ no, baby, it's good. ” he raises a hand which just calms you down for a bit, getting upset at your father's treatment.

“ baby?! what the fuck is going on!? ” your father stomps like a child.

“ hey, we don't use that language in this house. ” elvis says, as if he was talking to a toddler that just said his first curse word, clearly stating the rule he made when you moved in.

you father takes a breath. “ you told me she was in a music academy. ” he points at elvis again. “ and then, what do i see? ” he extends his arms. “ my daughter kissing you in some fucking magazine cover! ”

“ language! ” elvis suddenly screams.

the four of you are silent. even vernon stops sipping his coffee.

“ darling, would you come here? ”

you don't need to be asked twice as you walk to elvis' side, he wraps his arm in your waist.

“ i think it's time for his surprise. ”

your eye light up. “ really? ”

“ yeah! ”

“ what surprise? ” he asks, clearly tired at elvis ignoring the anger and hatred he feels at the moment.

“ show him, babydoll. ” he says, with his eyes focused on your father.

you extend your hand. your dad gasps.

a dazzling diamond in your middle finger illuminates his face.

your father passes out making you gasp and run to his aid. elvis watches behind you, with a winning smile in his face.

vernon sips coffee.

[felassan]

its that time again! 🍵 

Thoughts/wonderings on Dragon Age: The Missing #4, under a cut due to spoilers for The Missing -

I'm probably becoming a lil unhealthily obsessed with this building. what do we think it is? the Archon's Palace is the highest building in Minrathous (tho I guess not, as it has sewers and this is floating). A Circle? it has a similar shape to the logo for the Circle of Magi. the meeting place for the Magisterium senate, lording over everyone below from high above? whatever it is it looks cool and it must be important to be featured on the map. I wanna go there (๑*ᗜ*)

I love Neve Gallus' design. it's fresh and cool, and she just looks so cute and neat okay. also full of detail - the snake pattern on the headpiece, shoulder 'scales' and scales elsewhere, collar & jacket like one of those hooded snakes, snake-'tailcapped' footwear (rather than steel toe-capped), the serpent belt and of course most of all the beautiful snake design of her prosthetic limb. 10/10 character/costume design

this page had me on my knees basically. my heart.

surely this panel is a new meme format hh? same goes for the one where Varric is saying "Then perhaps all this is linked" and Harding says "And we've led them here"

you walked into the wrong neighborhood bro

I also liked this pair of illustrations, they had a nice 'bookend' feel and reminded me a lot of Lord of the Rings.

Other thoughts:

Minrathous looks kinda cyberpunk and (despite what Harding says in the opening panels) feels quite clean in this comic

Is that the person tailing them lurking in the doorway that Harding is catching sight of here?

These holes in Varric's ear seem to be new. What happened? Injury from the leopard attack?

confused a bit by the perspective flip in this issue. In issue 1, Varric was more like 'stop', and Harding was more like 'talk to him'. it's flipped around a bit here.

Varric smiled when he thought about Neve and then lit up when he saw her. she calls him an "old friend". I wonder how they met and how long they've known each other. something to do with varric's spy network?

This panel felt a bit meta hh.

When Neve says "Your friend is quite intense" is she referring to Solas or Harding?

Then we come to the two main things we learn in this issue:

We learn that Solas has been in Minrathous causing trouble. He's been attacking Venatori locations in the city, stealing artifacts from them and freeing elven slaves in the process, which has greatly angered the Venatori. The Venatori now want revenge and a "bunch of rebellious elves" are "causing trouble throughout the city, presumably in the name of the one who freed them". I wonder if the artifacts weaken the Veil, are connected to the idol somehow, or are simply sources of great power that Solas either needs for himself/his plans or that he simply thinks should be taken away from the Venatori so that they don't cause harm using them? Tevinter Nights showed agents of Fen'Harel seeking artifacts and referenced rumors of elven artifacts that strengthen the Veil, like the ones from DA:I. freeing folks also makes sense, "I am not a monster" and it's something he has a history of doing

In this issue we also learn that Neve works with a group called the Shadow Dragons, who have been trying to help the former slaves. indeed they're trying to help anyone who is held as slaves in Minrathous. this is our first time hearing about this new group. they make it their business to help those in need and Neve makes it her business to help them. I'm a bit ¿ about their name, just due to how it sounds, but it's exciting to learn about a new group/faction. Each issue of this DA:D prequel comic has shone a spotlight on a faction - Grey Wardens, Antivan Crows, the Veil Jumpers and the Shadow Dragons. two new, two old. it's a nice balance. and it brings to mind the common fan theory/speculation about the PC of DA:D having a different faction background depending on the player's choice. at the very least it feels like a way of saying 'these four groups [or characters from them] will feature in a significant way/be 'players on the board' in DA:D".

thinking about the Shadow Dragons' name in an in-world context, like thinking about why they may have chosen their name: dragons are emblematic of Tevinter. dragon imagery is everywhere there, dragons are a symbol of power and Tevinter heraldry shows a dragon. the Tevinter Imperium is a 'dragon', or several (metaphorically) - Magisters, ruling over the classes below. the "shadow dragons" feel like "the other side" of Tevinter, the side in shadow, the underside, the 'anti-Tevinter'. I'd guess that they are the "Tevinter you forgot", i.e. the Viper's faction. (and if you look at Tevinter heraldry, there is also a snake 'in opposition' to the dragon.) before Missing #4 I wondered if “the Tevinter you forgot” "means they are a group of folks who have fallen through the cracks in Tevinter society or who are the downtrodden in Tevinter society. is it some sort of uprising or anti-Magisterium movement?" - here we learn they're trying to help people Tevinter 'forgot' like slaves and former slaves. I also commented "from the story it sounds like the dark-clad card dealer is the Viper. the magister in the story is afraid of him and tries to claim that the Viper is just a tale, implying that the Viper’s name has become known as a sort of shadowy, stealthy urban legend in Minrathous and that it has a sort of bogeyman effect on magisters." Shadow indeed. Neve later comments that the Shadow Dragons are trying to "help anyone held as slaves in Minrathous". I think it was in the Dorian short story in Tevinter Nights that there's a reference to how there's now an anti-slavery movement in Tevinter. Is that the Shadow Dragons? you can see possible echoes of "the Tevinter you forgot" in later comic dialogue "The Shadow Dragons have vowed to help us restore our dignity. To get back the lives that were stolen from us by the Venatori. To make sure we don't have to scrabble in the dirt for food and warm", imo.

I wonder if Dorian, Mae and the Lucerni know anything about the Shadow Dragons? maybe they've done some work together?

and while the Viper/Viper's faction/the Shadow Dragons themselves didn't appear in issue 4, issue 4 still highlighted them, continuing the pattern I speculated about, of the DA Day short stories (Evka/Antoine/Wardens, Teia/Viago/Crows, Strife/Irelin/Veil Jumpers and Viper's faction/Shadow Dragons), one from each of those short stories per issue.

Varric is still having a bad time. also he was born in 9:1, and so if DA:D is set in 9:52, he's now over 50. from these comics, he's feeling old and tired. I don't expect that he'll be a companion in DA:D. more like an advisor (off-field), a contact or quest-giver, or the person that recruits us.

"But why? What did he get out of it? Surely, he wanted something in return" was an interesting line. because like on one hand "I am not a monster", he has a history of freeing people who were enslaved and he's shown as valuing freedom and not enjoying needless suffering. setting people free definitely is the only decent thing. but he's also smart and does things with purpose, always playing 4-D chess, and has been outwitting Varric and Harding at every turn throughout these comic issues, always one step ahead. it seems like a 'it's both' situation. like two birds, one stone. he would free people and it's the right thing to do, and he also gains from it strategically. Varric lampshades this in the final page: and it's three stones, actually. Solas freed people, dealt with the Venatori on his tail and slowed Varric/Harding down long enough to escape all in one move.

Also, at first I wondered if the brown-haired elf was sort've projecting his own perceptions on Solas (with the "his kin" lines). but look here. the leader of these Venatori has a pouch round their neck. the others don't, it's prominently placed and it's consistent on this Venatori in every panel they're in here. and where have we seen that before? around the neck of the Venatori stalker that saved Varric from the leopard in Issue 3. I think we're supposed to conclude that the ringleader of the Venatori that attack the elves in this issue is the Venatori person that's been tailing Varric and Harding all throughout these comic issues. the Venatori ringleader seems to recognize Varric in a later panel, with the "You!". They fight and Varric starts demanding answers from the Venatori leader. but then, just as he's about to get answers, the brown-haired elf intervenes and kills them at that very moment. they won't hurt their people anymore, and conveniently also (more than one purpose to things again..), now Varric and Harding won't get any answers. and also this:

another - not two, but - three stones. when the brown-haired elf kills the Venatori ringleader, A) preventing them from further harming his people and B) preventing them from giving any answers to Varric and Harding, C) the killing blow also cuts that pouch from their neck. a very specific thing to depict. presumably in the chaos of the Venatori leader's death (you can't see the elf's hands in the very next panel) the brown-haired elf has grabbed the pouch, and part of his goal all along was to take it. I think we're supposed to conclude that the pouch contained the crucious stone and that the brown-haired elf works for Solas. so the "You're too late, I already have the crucious stone" letter from issue 3 was a Solas fakeout, the Venatori at that point in time did in fact have the stone (having beaten Solas to the vault, and as-shown by the Venatori who saved Varric from the leopard having the pouch around their neck), and the events of issue 4 were part of Solas' plan to steal it/steal it back from them (and going by Neve's earlier dialogue, it's not the first artifact he's stolen from them). so two things here: one, Solas' 'three stones' are actually-actually four (free the slaves, deal with the Venatori on his tail, delay Varric/Harding long enough to escape, and steal the crucious stone artifact from the Venatori [my head hurts]). and two, the brown-haired elf was working for Solas after all. he'll give the pouch (and the contents, the stone) to Solas, "he set us, his kin, free" wasn't projection considering that he does work for him, and him being there in the alleyway when he was, with the information that he had, was part of Solas' plan to escape and get the stone. otherwise, it's pretty convenient that one of the former slaves at the place Neve's aware of where former slaves have been eating scraps, at the time when she takes Varric/Harding there, just happened to have helpful info about the meeting that Varric/Harding needed and also happened to kill the Venatori leader and in the process cut the pouch from their neck. idk if it means all the elves here were working for Solas or just the brownhaired one or the brownhaired one & the blond one, but yea. definitely the brownhaired elf is I think.

Neve fighting was cool: staff-less magic and then as a mage using a dagger or shortsword.

party combo-kill! ice spell + finishing blow - a comic depiction of Shattering :)

Brown-haired elf missing his elven ear here.

A cool panel. Also, you can't see his other hand..

just really liked these two panels :) also, they missed their chance, they missed this chance, in this, a comic called The Missing... is that why it's called that?

[clenches fist] vowing to protect Neve and her good heart at all costs

and he stole the crucious stone artifact from the Venatori.

I am not sure that I agree with the premise of this article that BioWare retweeted, that The Missing is required reading before DA:D. I enjoyed issues 2 & 3 a lot! I was hoping for a bit more from the end of issue 4, perhaps a small Solas appearance like at the end of Dark Fortress or just a bit more insight into his plans or things in/the setup for DA:D. finishing on the Dread Wolf mural from the DA:D TGA 2020 trailer as a reminder was neat but the highlight reveal from these comics as a whole was definitely the new mural depicted in issue 3.

"He knows us too well, we need to find/use people he doesn't know" is the same conclusion that was reached at the end of Trespasser (and Harding was present for that conversation). I guess the meta irl reasons for The Missing are: A] since it'll be almost 10 years irl between games, to refresh folks about that conclusion and the fact that it will be a new PC and why it has to be 'someone he doesn't know', since most new players to the franchise at DA:D aren't going to buy years old DA:I and DLC and play til it the end of Trespasser B] fill some irl time C] do some marketing/advertizing and D] highlight these four groups/factions and introduce the two new ones (Veil Jumpers and Shadow Dragons) in advance of DA:D, and possibly highlight these specific characters (Strife, Teia, Evka etc) the same way (though I speculate those characters are more like DA:D 'contact' cameos rather than that they will be companions themselves). Certainly if I was Varric at the moment when Harding asks "So who are you thinking?" at the end here, after the events I had experienced and people & groups I had met in recent weeks, with those being fresh in my mind, I would be thinking about the Grey Wardens, the Antivan Crows, the Veil Jumpers and the Shadow Dragons, both as groups and terms of the mental list of people that I had recently met who Solas doesn't know. again it makes you think about the popular speculation that the DA:D PC will have the background of being from one of these groups. also, those 4 groups aren't ones which were referenced in Tevinter Nights as keeping an eye on Solas/as Solas having some info on them in turn (unlike some other groups like the Mortalitasi, the Executors, the Ben-Hassrath etc).

[theallegedbird]

LITERALLY

Like

For example "6up 5oh (cop out)" IS LITERALLY THAT ONE POLICE EP FROM S5 where Jonny said the disclaimer at the beginning OR or bro c'mon literally "dr sunshine is dead" is about the dark OR "hand me my shovel, I'm going in" is about the buried or I personally connect "Mr. capgras encounters a second-hand vanity: tulpamancer's prosopagnosia/pareidolia (as direct result of trauma to fusiform gyrus)" to the stranger bc he keeps singing "you're trying to replace yourself" which I think really fits and also the song "skeleton appreciation day in vestal, my (bones)" also reminds me of the buried but also a bit of Jane Prentiss/the infestation and the jarchivist himself and also the rot yezyez the rotting too and also the beginning of the song "front street" where he sings about the slaughterhouse and meat...yes It's the flesh and the slaughter!!!!

And bro c'mon will wood is just so bbgirl his songs just fit SO WELL it's almost as if he wrote them specifically for tma

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I'm low-key obsessed with him and I don't even listen to all the songs (I have the entire "everything's alot" album downloaded >I love it really mutch + a few other ones so I hope this counts ❤️)

Have a nice day btw love youuu❤️❤️❤️❤️ (I hope I didn't squish your brain to death with this friggin paragraph I just wrote :'] )

[ID of image in ask: a screenshot of a caption of a tumblr post by theallegedbird that the ask is responding to, it reads "memento mori- will wood, i can and will find a way to relate every ww song to tma istg". End ID]

NO LITERALLY,, YOU ARE SO RIGHT

kind of got carried away so um. long post

completely agree and feel the same about 6up 5oh cop out, dr sunshine is dead and mr capgras

6up 5oh cop out to me especially could be linked to daisy and the guy you mentioned as well as the hunt as whole because of both of them being heavily tied to and criticising the police/police brutality

warning for discussion of eds in this paragraph

skeleton appreciation day for me is the flesh,, dont get me wrong i can see your ideas too but i always interpreted the song as being about eds and negatively/unhealthily watching your weight in order to achieve "the perfect body" by society's standards; by being skinny,, "tell me you can see my bones" , "to cut down on my silhouette" and the whole end dialogue, so that fits into the flesh for me considering another situation of someone wanting the "ideal body" is something that is discussed in a flesh statement (mag90-bodybuilder), but i can see some themes in the song that can could be corruption, plus both the flesh and corruption are pretty closely linked at times (and smirkes system is just inaccurate to begin with)

dr sunshine is dead is as you said the dark to me,, in the sense of someone maybe becoming an avatar (song starts with narrator afraid of the dark/not knowing and ends with them embracing it) but also could be seen as the stranger or even spiral because of its themes (like most of ww's work) involving identity and the self

for hand me my shovel,, may i propose it is also s2 jon coded. very s2 jon coded. it is very much his paranoid need for the 'truth'. do you. do you get me

id also like to propose some other ww songs that are also extremely tma coded,, to me

blackboxwarrior!! ok stick with me but yknow that one dialogue bit that starts "hello, welcome. why don’t you take a seat?" that whole section. thats og elias and jonah in elias' interview. do you see the vision. its them. i always take it as jonah being the narrator when looking at this song with tma in mind,, with the "you’ve lost your mind and almost lost your life before, so you’ll be fine" and "for what it’s worth if it was going to kill you, boy, it would have by now" being directed at jon. please say im not insane for this i. i listen to this song a lot.

on the topic of jon and jonah your body my temple. because. because hes using jon as a pawn,, "your visage my visions" (i know this songs about sydney and elijah ch&t but can be tma too. if you think about it)

again with jon and jonah (i despise jonah and the godforsaken thing that is jonelias but their dynamic is so interesting) laplaces angel,, dont know how to put this one into words but do you Get It,, could be both or either of them really,, certain lyrics include: "it doesnt take a killer to murder it only takes a reason to kill", "the difference twixt fate and free will is whether youre singing", "whatever you think of me, if you were in my shoes, youd walk the same damn miles i do"

against the kitchen floor could also be jmart,, especially these parts: "i just havent learnt to be as human as you are yet", "i still dont know who you are, only that im still lonely", "apologizing for my life and ever entering yours" "im not a good person, im barely a person at all"

cicada days,, jon. jon coded. i really want ro make something with especially the in case i die live show version bc it just fits. so well. "it just feels inhumane to lose this much", "let all my red flags fade to white yeah i give up", and biggest one to me "here at the end of days, my god what have i done?" as in mag160,,

cotard's solution is the stranger,, again with the identity

there’s more but i’ve just realised how long this already is so ima leave it there

pff sorry for hijacking your ask but i’m a sucker for media analysis and any opportunity to do that with not one but two of my special interests causes me to black out and the autism to take over <33

also you’re so real for everything is lot,, favourite album

have a great day or night :D

[lulu2992]

After listening to this song on repeat and/or having it regularly stuck in my head these past few weeks, I’ve finally seen Wish!

I had read many reviews that said the movie was bland because it lacked originality, and while I understand this point of view, in a way... I think it was intentional.

The film was released for Walt Disney Animation Studios’ 100th Anniversary and is full of more or less obvious references to other Disney movies, whether it’s a well-known character name that’s mentioned, someone directly quoting another film, or even just a background, object, gesture, or scene composition that, for some reason, feels familiar. The fact that all those “Easter eggs”, which could have been very annoying but, in my opinion, manage to remain fun (not really in a self-mocking way as Enchanted did, though), exist, combined with the images that appear during the end credits and the scene that follows (yes, there is a post-credits scene), make me say the goal was to make the “Disneyest Disney movie”.

Wish is not lazy, it’s a celebration.

It’s still its own film with its own story, but it’s first and foremost a tribute to Walt Disney Animation Studios, all the movies they’ve released over the years, and the now iconic (some might say overused) concepts of “wishing upon a star” and hoping your “dreams come true”. At one point, there’s also a flip book (with a time chart!), and I see this as a nod to traditional animation, as well as an homage to the original “magic makers”: animators in general.

So yes, it’s unoriginal and maybe not the most memorable Disney film. As you would expect, it opens on a storybook, takes place in a fictional kingdom, features a heroine who has an animal sidekick and a dead parent, and she has to fight against a charismatic villain who uses green magic. I would describe Wish as a quintessential Disney movie, and while it may not be groundbreaking, it’s still cute, pretty, and entertaining. The characters are good and, even when they don’t have a lot of screen time, have distinct personalities. I’m thinking in particular of Asha’s friends who, as I’ve just realized writing this, must be a reference to the Seven Dwarves (even their initials match)... There also are many songs, of course, as they are yet another trademark of Disney movies. Special mention to “This Is The Thanks I Get?!” because I thought it was quite catchy and the most original!

Speaking of King Magnifico, he really is a great character and “classic” Disney villain, and it feels like we hadn’t seen that in a while. That said, [spoilers]…

...I was a bit disappointed they introduced his tragic backstory (without fully explaining what exactly happened, by the way) and then didn’t really do anything with it at the end. Sure, it humanizes him, gives him depth, and explains why he’s unhealthily obsessed with being in control, and I agree that not all villains need or deserve a full redemption arc, but… I don’t know, since they mention the fact his family died and that the fear of loss is what motivates him (at least at the beginning), I expected that to play a bigger role in the story, and especially in its conclusion. I’m not saying he should have been redeemed because I don’t know if it would have worked in that story anyway, but taking into account his past, the fact they mention it several times, and what they (Disney) have been doing with many of their villains lately, I simply thought it was likely to happen. Maybe King Magnifico didn’t necessarily “deserve better” as a person because he does become “evil”, to the point that even Queen Amaya, his wife, eventually turns her back on him despite their seemingly sincere connection, but as a character, I’m inclined to say he did…

Oh well, at least he has the coolest villain song!

Also, knowing my love for charismatic antagonists with a tragic backstory, maybe it’s best for me that they didn’t explore that further and just let him apparently irremediably lose himself. Had they decided to “save” him, even partially, or give the audience more reasons to feel sorry for him, I fear I could really have spiraled out of control :’)

[deepestuniversallove]

If you cannot accept that I cannot immediately answer messages, or that I sometimes disappear for weeks on end, we cannot really be friends. Because you got to understand, I have anxiety in social situations. I have AVOIDANT personality disorder. I AVOID people, it's in the name!! I am convinced that I am inherently worthless and that my presence is a hindrance to others,and this is why I don't reply so fast and end up ghosting people. I am afraid to hurt them, and then my absence causes that fear to come true, because they take my absence to mean that I hate them, when the opposite is true. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. And then when they lash out at me and say they don't wanna be friends any more, all it does is lead me to the conclusion that i was right. I am WORTHLESS and a BURDEN, or else I wouldn't have been dropped like a hot potato.

Fuck humans. Fuck human relationships. The only beings who love you without prejudice will always be animals - even the most vicious dogs seem to like me and not judge me. Wild Crows flock to me. Pigeons sit on my shoulder. Rats boggle when I hold them. At least they see me as worthy. At least they don't complain about feeling "attacked" because I chose to self-isolate for a while. While humans always do.

Too many people I considered friends end up dropping me, and you still tell me I am supposed to TRUST? To open myself up for another round of hurt that will come FOR SURE? Fuck that. I'd rather be alone, and kill the last side of me that still yearns for connection with others of my species. No one cares about me, so why should I give a damn? And yet I want to love, and I want to care, and I DO. Even if it seems like I don't because I am gone for a while, I DO. I just have this expectation that even if we are apart for a while, we can still take it up where we left off, you know? I have the expectation that you won't take it as a personal attack when I don't answer for a while. I expect that you won't take my absence as hatred. In my eyes it is love - I spare you having to deal with a burden like me for a while.

The neurotypical people won't understand this at all. And the social media and being connected online 24/7 has made so many people think that you now have to ALWAYS be available. But I can't. I just can't, my personality disorder doesn't allow for that. Leave me alone, I need to be alone, having to reply immediately or you will explode in rage will make me upset.

Or maybe all I find are abusers and people who wanted to use me for my goodwill. I sent them presents. I drew them pictures, taking time i don't have out of the busy day. And what do I get in the end??

"EWW, you are too old for me, you are creepy. You are unhealthily obsessed with fictional characters!"

- YES, maybe I am, but you know WHY? BECAUSE THEY DON'T BREAK MY HEART AND STOMP IT TO THE GROUND. They are the only safe haven for someone who fails at social interactions. And they will STAY the only safe haven for as long as I get rejected over and over again. As long as I keep losing friends, they will be the only constant I have. Can you really blame me for that? All humans have to have SOMETHING to rely on in their core. And the fictional characters, as sad or unhealthy as it may be, are that thing for me. So don't go around and blame me for it or call me cringe. I would have died at age 11 if they weren't there, for I would have had NOTHING. But of course, people who have a loving family, or a normal upbringing can never understand this. They have a support system to rely on, a net to fall into. I only have a bottomless abyss with no net beneath me. If I fall, I'll die.

And you don't understand the agelessness of it all. My body may be 33, but my mind is stuck at a younger age, perpetually. I don't have a clue on how to navigate social relationships. I don't know how adults can do it. No one showed me and thus I never learned. My narcissist mother only taught me that this is a "shark eat shark"-world and I am just a small fish. Even if I have one PhD or a million, that doesn't teach you anything about relationships either. Intellectual pursuits may not make up for the emotional black hole in me. I understand why I do what I do, intellectually, but I am unable to DO something to change it.

"Then just stop being avoidant and get out there!"

- I can't. I want to,but I can't bear even the CHANCE of being rejected again. Of opening myself up only to be discarded like so much trash. Even 10+ years long relationships aren't safe, that is what I experienced. You go through so much together, sacrifice so much of yourself, only to be told "Hahaha, you are so pathetic, to think I have ever loved you." How often can this happen to you before you are entirely jaded? How many times before you say "fuck this shit, I'm out, I won't play a game i cannot win" ??

If you don't want to be my friend any more because you outgrew me, all the more power to you. Congrats, you get to be a neurotypical normie. And maybe it is good you left me behind, the perpetual burden. Go on and thrive and don't look back at me!!

But for me, all I got is myself. And the question:

Who will leave me next?

And

Is just surviving on my own really enough to live?

[thefinalboss387]

For a very long time, I LOVED Eobard Thawne in The CW’s Flash TV series. I mean, I still love him, but... hoo boy his characterization has been shaky over the show’s 8 seasons. Excuse me for a minute while I rant about the downfall of one of my favorite characters ever under the cut. Watch out for spoilers.

In season 1, he was arguably at his peak. He was the big bad of the season, hiding in plain sight as the mentor helping and growing not only the Flash, but his entire team. Despite being a good guy 95% of his screentime, his whole character was shrouded in mystery... why is he pretending to be in a wheelchair? Why is this nice mentor killing people when the Flash isn’t looking? Why do so many people have murderous grudges against him? How many secrets is this guy holding onto? Why does he seem so unhealthily obsessed with the Flash? What is it he’s after? Who exactly is Harrison Wells?

And as we got the answers to those questions... they didn’t disappoint! Thawne was a complex, compelling character. He traveled back in time and got stuck in the present, and in order to return to his own time, he had to be the one to give his greatest enemy the Flash his powers and get him fast enough for the task. In the process, he actually grew to love and respect his enemy, despite holding onto so much hatred and contempt for his future self. It created a fascinating dynamic between Flash and Reverse-Flash. Both sides loved each other as friends, as mentor/student, as teammates, but they also hated each other, and all the conflict and hesitation that came with holding those two extremes for one another.

And that dynamic didn’t even just stop with Barry/Flash... He had an almost-familial relationship with Cisco and Caitlin, with Joe... he was one of the team, even though he was secretly plotting to destroy the people he was growing to love.

After season 1, though... it feels like a lot of the complexities and nuance of the character just kind of... fizzled out.

I mean, don’t get me wrong, there are still some noticeable glimpses of it. In season 2, he left a video will where he gave all of his belongings, the laboratory, etc to Barry, and even confessed to his mother’s murder to get his father out of prison. When a different world’s Harrison Wells comes around, it takes Barry a minute to come to terms with someone wearing his greatest enemy’s face, and he needs to let go and forgive Thawne before he can move on.

In season 5, Thawne ends up being the big plot-twist villain of the season, secretly pulling the strings behind Nora, Barry’s time-traveling future daughter. Similarly, he was using her to achieve his own ends, but grew to actually love her and care about her. He still didn’t feel as complex as he used to... but there was something there, and it was appreciated.

Beyond that, though... Thawne kind of just became a typical, mustache-twirling hate machine. He kept coming back, time and time again, looking to destroy the Flash’s life. All of the conflicted emotion and love is gone - not just from Thawne’s side, but all of the heroes see him just as a villain they need to stop.

In Legends of Tomorrow, Thawne becomes the main antagonist of season 2, and creates an entirely new reality that is shaped in his image -- and none of the Flash team is present in it. The Legends are all in subservient minion-type roles to him, Thawne is even at STAR Labs again, but the Flash is dead and his team is nowhere to be found. After all the love he had for Barry, Cisco, Caitlin, etc., you mean to tell me they have no place in his “perfect” world?? He mentions his work with Team Flash in passing at one point, so this version of Thawne did experience that, but has none of the emotion attached to it anymore. My personal headcanon is that he still kept them all onboard as doting lab assistants or something, because I refuse to believe he wouldn’t want them back in his life after openly saying how much he cared for them all only a few seasons ago.

There is a storyline where a version of Thawne stops being a supervillain and settles down. But it also comes with amnesia and pretty much becoming a whole other character, so that was kind of disappointing. We’ve seen firsthand that Thawne has good qualities and is capable of love and friendship... but apparently he needs amnesia to really embrace it at all... with brand new characters we’ve never seen before.

By the time season 8 comes around, Thawne becomes an avatar of the negative forces and essentially loses all of his humanity and becomes a big beast of a final boss for the Flash to take down. Which, for a big final battle to settle the score once and for all, is kind of cool, but it’s disappointing that the road leading to this final confrontation was so generic. Thawne had lost his humanity a long time ago, and was just an obstacle to take down now.

I want the Thawne that actually loved Barry and his team, who still battled them and tortured them, but had to stop and wince in hesitation and conflict before doing so. The Thawne who complimented how smart Cisco was and called him a son before killing him. The Thawne who constantly told Barry he loved him and tried to emotionally manipulate him out of fighting. The Thawne that Barry, Cisco, and Caitlin looked up to and saw as a mentor and an idol, despite the evil he’d done.

Sorry for the rant. Eobard Thawne, the show version of him, was - and is - one of my favorite characters of all time. But I feel like, as the show went on, they moved away from the fascinating new take they created and moved closer to the generic, spiteful villain of the comics. And that is truly a shame. It wasn’t how much he hated the Flash, or how many times he kept coming back, that made him a great character. It was the history he had with the heroes, the relationships, the conflict. How he came off as so caring and kind, and lifted them up while secretly stabbing them all in the back. I realize that there is only so much they could’ve done with that dynamic once the facade was lifted, but... the show hardly even tried to capitalize on that past and add depth to their conflict moving forward. It was just.... hatred. On both sides.

The show started right out the gate with Flash’s biggest enemy. And while his initial arc was great, I feel the show overall suffered for it. Of COURSE the Reverse-Flash was going to end up coming back again and again - anyone who has read a Flash comic knows that that’s his thing. But, in season 1, his story was already fully completed and satisfying. It felt like his return in future seasons (with the possible exception of season 5′s Nora arc) was just checking off a checklist of necessary things to do, not so much doing any actual service to his character or storyline.

[seijorhi]

hi rhi! just checking in bc i had an epiphany (maybe??) about oikawa, after thinking about the ned fulmer cheating on his wife thing for arguably longer than i should. hear me out though, because this might get long and ramble-y (and frankly might not even have a point to it </3)

i like to think that ned fulmer liked the idea of a wife much more than he liked ariel. he’d constantly mention her in his videos but only as “my wife”, not “ariel”, despite the fact that everyone knew who ariel was. she was also a public figure and it was no secret who she was married to as well. this isn’t to say ned didn’t love ariel, that’s between them, but i will never not find this “wife life” psychology interesting. i really need to contemplate majoring in some form of human studies at this point.

as for oikawa in near all of your fics with him, it’s pretty easy to say he is infatuated with the idea of a wife too. in some form or another he wants permanence with the reader and his “relationship”, whether that’s marriage or marking her as his in some way, shape, or form. this information isn’t new, of course, but the contrast between oikawa and ned are so unnecessarily interesting to me bc they’re both in love with the idea of a wife- and both only really refer to their relationships as how they are (yes i know thats probably for reader not having a true name in fic sense but i like to think he would still refer to reader as his wife regardless). the only major difference is that oikawa only has eyes for one wife in his fantasy. reader.

it’s obvious to us that oikawa wants a family. wants to “settle down” and whatnot. but because of the parallels between his infatuation with the wife life and reader, reader is unfortunately roped into his obsession, and therefore now the only one oikawa has eyes for.

ned fulmer is (i assume) mentally healthy, unlike oikawa (and every single character in your fics, love it though), and doesn’t become unhealthily obsessed like the way oikawa does. he doesn’t have a true person he admires to associate with his love for the wife life, so the philosophy outweighs the love he has or thinks he has for his family.

oikawa, in that sense, is different. he of course wants a family first, and has always been infatuated with that idea from what i can assume from your writing. but because he falls hard for whatever he may see in reader too, he has a face associated with the wife life. he doesn’t necessarily call reader by name, only whittling her down into being his wife, and in that case objectifying/dehumanizing her, but i feel like we already know he does that based off the fact that he is willing to chain her up and break her legs rather than let her do something that goes against what he wants, aka the perfect wife.

i’m aware this doesn’t have a true point to it that we didn’t already know, but compared to the ned fulmer situation i find it so interesting. ALSO to justify this whole rant being called an epiphany i will say that this was more of an epiphany bc all of this was more subconscious maybe(?? please let me have this its like 4 in the morning and i’m not entirely cohesive, obviously)

anyway, i love your fics rhi, and i’ve been binging any and all oikawa fics despite the fact that i can hardly recall the titles (IM SORRY) to bring in specific instances </3

- ps idk if the emoji anon thing is still a thing but i’d love to stake my claim on 💍 or 🧣 anon if they’re available </3

okay, so i can't really talk about the whole ned fulmer thing because tbh i had no idea who the man was or what the hell the try guys were until suddenly everyone was talking about it. at one point i genuinely thought people were trying to gaslight me into believing that everyone knew because... sounded fake, but okay ghfjdkjhgfjdk

what i will say is that for some of the characters i write, marriage is meaningless. some would entertain if it was something the reader wanted (which, again considering 95% of my readers are firmly in the 'i hate you' camp.... doubtful), but you're just as much theirs with or without some stupid piece of paper saying so. and i would probably say the same thing in regards to wanting kids, for every character who wants to breed like bunnies, there's another who has zero desire in sharing the reader with little snot nosed gremlins any time soon.

oikawa sees marriage and motherhood as ties more than anything else. he (in the fics he's married ofc) continually calls attention to that bond to remind her that she's stuck with him. bound to him. it's a reminder that he won, she's not getting away, and he wants that reminder to sink in deep. she's his. it's both a victory flag and a blow to the reader's defiance in one. a term of 'endearment'.

which isn't to say that he doesn't want a family, he absolutely does, but he also loves coming out on top. it's not so much that he wants the reader because he wants a wife/mother to his kids, more that because he's obsessively gone off the deep end with the reader, he wants everything with her.

[master-k0hga]

| B R A D Y |

[ Category: The Promised Land ]

| Last OC ref in my drafts before I post the couple other lots later today (Cuz I think I might've missed like one or two, not like this post would be done and posted before I have to leave for work anyways..)

This is Brady, also part of the Frostclaw tribe (and again, everyone from this project were former Yiga OCs..). Brady is a nervous wreck and seems very timid and sweet on the outside.. In fact he kind of is, except that he's obsessed with the town's local chef to an unhealthily unhinged degree. Like full on stalkerish fan and also in love too..

But other than that, if he's not being obsessed, he can be kinda chill too...

Anyways.

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

INFO

Name: Brady Species: Ice Elf General Personality: Sensitive, kind, nervous, love-struck, emotional, jealous, sweet Height: 6ft “8” Relationship Status: Single

Extra Info:

He works part time in the local library of the town, mostly works at the little shop that resides near the back of the library itself along with a small café inside too. Absolutely filled with glee when they get a delivery for new books each month, especially when Jackson's cookbooks are in the monthly delivery

Is a fan of Jackson and his food, loves to go to every restaurant and bakery to try out the food; However is a little disappointed when the food isn't up to par with the "man himself"

Loves food and can be quite the food critic, believe it or not even though he's just some average joe, he does inspire some beginner chefs with his whimsical critiques; Although sometimes his opinions tend to get shut down when he starts comparing food to his favourite chef

He can get rather jealous very quickly, so his obsessiveness can sometimes get the better of him. His traits can be toxic however that seems to be a mechanism his brain triggers when he feels "threatened". Does go to therapy trying to control it but tends to purposefully miss out on his sessions for obvious reasons

Sometimes when there are updates or other public announcements about the town he doesn't usually keep up to date with much, due to lacking understanding, his personal stresses and whatnot. It's not exactly a bad thing; However he does become misunderstood sometimes because he doesn't keep up or show any empathy for something. People just need patience is all

He's not a fighter for the town but he is part of a small force who defend it when it comes to emergencies or last-minute procedures; Although dangers don't come around here as much as they used to, sometimes you get the odd rebels from the outer walls of the town infiltrating and causing a slight ruckus now and then

He loves reading and listening to audio books, especially to help him sleep. Or even when he's washing dishes or doing chores

Flails his hands in excitement, especially towards interests or things he enjoys. It's cute

He doesn't have many friends, but he enjoys talking to his regular customers, seeing as most are mainly old ladies or visitors who have decided to stay in the tourist/vacation side of town. It's helped his socials skills quite a bit despite still having a little ways to go

+ + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + +

Words aren't working, forgetting what words to use for these now and I hate it.. Oh well not like that matters anyways, but still have loads of these to go anyways so I'll be doing these for an awful long time.

I just don't really want to draw fan art in between re-posting and trying to finish off OC refs and whatnot because I'll just get distracted and leave them all to collect dust all over again.. Designing characters is always fun though, it's just trying to name them, working out their purpose and further developing them.... Especially when you decided to make it into a project and go as far as to creating worlds for them.

I want to die..

. Brady, Art © Me . DON’T RE-POST .

[inkykeiji]

hi clari :p i just wanted to ask if flawless tomura is really in love with the reader? he’s my favorite of all your characters because he seems saner and more genuine than bmb tomura but some of the stuff he does/says seems like he doesn’t really love her

hehe hi anon!! <3 this is an interesting question, and it has an equally interesting and complex answer.

tw: discussions of abuse, drug addiction, mental illness, clari overshares, LONG answer

okay SO.

flawless tomura is, just like every other character i write, HEAVILY flawed as a person. he isn’t a ‘good’ person. he has a lot of issues/problematic qualities; he’s extremely entitled, he’s selfish, he is unhealthily possessive which leads to extreme jealousy and obsessiveness, he needs to be the boss at all the times and thus is extremely controlling, etc etc the list goes on. these are all huge red flags, obviously.

he is much more genuine than bmb tomura in the sense that he is extremely, extremely honest. he is so bluntly honest about his thoughts and his feelings, and he rarely lies unless he has a good reason to (and does not consider lying via omission—ie conveniently not telling reader about how he bought the consignment store and stalked her, is a drug addict, is heir to a yakuza empire, etc—to be lying. to him, it’s her fault that she didn’t ask. but he isn’t actively lying to her or hiding things from her; if she asked, he’d be brutally honest with her).

‘love’ can be a very interesting, complicated, complex and convoluted topic, depending on the relationship and the people. my father claims to love my mom, to love his kids, but he put us nearly a million dollars in debt, he stole money from all of us to support his drug addiction, he put me in some seriously dangerous situations when i was under ten fucking years old, all to support his drug addiction. he was and still is extremely abusive towards all of us. mental illness and extreme childhood trauma may be an explanation for his actions, but it isn’t and never will be an excuse. he is still responsible for his own decisions, and it is still his responsibility to get better, to DO better, and to be a decent fucking human being.

do i doubt his love? not necessarily, but he made a lot of very dire mistakes that caused all of us a lot of pain and irreversible scars, and eventually they’re no longer mistakes, they’re decisions, they’re conscious choices, they’re patterns of behaviour. and yet, despite these choices he consciously made, knowing they’d hurt those he loves and values most, i still wouldn’t say he doesn’t love us deeply and dearly, because i know my father, and i know he does.

a lot of people would say that these aren’t things you do to people you truly love, and i get that. i understand that sentiment. they most definitely are not things good and/or mentally healthy people do to those they love. i could never conceive doing any of the shit he did to us to my significant other. but the truth of it all is the people you love WILL hurt you at least once, because they are flawed human beings. and the truth is, no matter how hard you try not to, you WILL hurt the people you love at least once, because you are a flawed human being, too. i think, personally, what it comes down to is intent and reaction. we don’t usually mean to hurt our loved ones. those of us with good hearts don’t consciously make these decisions. and then it’s important to question: does that person take responsibility for their mistakes? do they acknowledge them and learn + grow from them and become better from them? or do they continue to make these choices even after they know they hurt you? etc.

i’m going off on this tangent to demonstrate how complex and complicated love can truly become when it involves a person like this; like tomura, like touya-nii, like my father. as i’m sure is very evident, my own father is a huge source of inspiration for the men i write, for lack of a better word. i am NOT going off on this tangent to excuse anyone’s behaviour or say it’s alright; no one deserves to be treated like this, and if anyone reading this finds themselves in a relationship like this, romantic or otherwise, please leave as soon as it is feasible; it is not healthy and it is not safe.

so does flawless!tomura genuinely love his reader? yes, absolutely. is it true love? i don’t know, what is true love, really? how do you define it? it’s a different answer for everyone. most of us would say no. but to HIM it most definitely is true love; he’d rip your fucking head off if you implied otherwise. this is the only way he personally can conceive love. does his ‘love’ excuse his abuse or make it okay? no, absolutely not, and it never will. but does he love her? yeah, he does.

it isnt always as black and white as people who have never experienced abuse would like you to believe. people are complicated, people are MESSY. conveniently, a lot of these themes and topics are touched upon in part two!

WHEW okay. that was a lot but i hope it helps a lil! art is subjective and i always welcome everyone who consumes my work to interpret it however they want to (death of the author n all that jazz, my own meaning + interpretation is only one of infinite), so this is my answer as the author. but it may also be beneficial (and fun!) to ask yourself what YOU think. how do you interpret his love/feelings and their relationship? what does true/real love mean to YOU? how do you define it? do the aggravating factors (ie who tomura is as a person, the fact that he won’t ever be capable of 100% healthy love) make an impact at all? do you believe this is love, or is it just really intense infatuation and obsession? etc!! you’re welcome to believe whatever you’d like <3 but this is my answer as the author! c:

[depressed-teacup-inc]

Why is this romantic again?

Glaciator 2 is absolutely infuriating!!!! Hooray….

But before I start criticizing this episode, let me say the two things I liked about this episode!

1. Gabriel is kinda maybe half a dad, and it’s too little too late, but I respect that so much (like he looks better then marinette in this episode, at this point, I would not mind Adrien betraying Ladybug with Gabriel, as toxic as Gabriel is)

2. Chat Noir moving on!

Listen I love Chat Noir, but if I’m being completely real with y’all, he is obsessed with Ladybug. He does need to move on and distance himself from Ladybug, and I’m proud that he tried this episode!

…NOW LETS DISCUSS WHY IN COMPARISON TO MARINETTE THIS IS BULLSHIT!!!

And for that let me list Marinette’s behavior throughout this episode!

1. She treats Chat Noir like absolute garbage and physically hurts him when he shows mild excitement about them being seen as a couple (I understand frustration but she has no fucking right to do this, especially mid battle!) and everyone is just saying it’s comedy??? THATS NOT HOW YOU TREAT PEOPLE!

(Little note that she threw him into a literal trash can only to kick him out of on the roof top and scream at him. Again, I understand frustration but this is like a million red flags sewn together to a huge red flag)



2. this… this entire scene.

And like. For the life of me, I do not get how this show has justified this. The lesson in this episode is that you shouldn’t give up on your love and that no script can help with confession. But that’s not what marinette should have learned!!!

She needs to learn that Adrien might not react exactly how she wants him to! And that he’s his own person! Literally she got furious at Chat for not reacting the way she wanted him to and asking her what should he do, because all she expects from Adrien (and Chat) is to admire her and immediately say yes! THATS FUCKED UP!!!! This entire script is super ironic because this is marinette literally telling Chat to not think about himself when she’s the one guilty of that crime!

And when the confession practice (obviously) doesn’t work out? She cries and has chat comfort her and tell her to not give up.

…because if you’ve been stalking a guy for ages kids, instead of moving on or learning to treat him like a person, you should just keep insisting, hurt everyone around you, and when it eventually falls apart? Cry and everyone will comfort you.

(Note: Have you noticed Marinette only starts treating Chat nicely when he’s absolutely compliant and becomes a “yes” man for her? No? Cuz apparently the Marichat “date” was distracting)

And to too it all off? She never once apologized and Adrien is just roped into loving Ladybug. AGAIN.

This episode is basically Hack San but everything wrong and messed up with the love square!!

Both are in love (unhealthily so) with the other (not true self, don’t even bring that shit near me) and when Chat noir tries to move on or be happy (because god forbid marinette would be criticized for her behaviors and be forced to move on! She only half tries to do that when Adrien breathes the same air as another woman) he is also given shit for moving on, is forced to comfort marinette and tell her she is completely in the right (because again, his forbid she’d be called out and forced to develop) and is roped back in with Ladybug.

…why is this supposedly a romance again? The only good thing I’m getting out of this is that Gabriel I-drink-my-son’s-tears-for-breakfast Agreste is better then Marinette and that Kagami is a manga fan

[i-cant-sing]

Yandere Viktor Nikiforov Headcanons

No anime character will ever be as beautiful as him. I said what I said 😤

Check out my MASTERLIST for more!

Yandere Viktor Nikifirov:

He's a manipulative and possessive yandere.

He doesn't know what exactly pulled him towards you, maybe its the way you carry yourself or the way you don't care about what others think of you. Whatever the reason may be, you have caught his eye.

Once he enters into your life, say goodbye to any and all personal space. Even before you guys are dating, he's always touching you. An arm around your waist, hands holding yours, soft pecks to your cheeks, etc. You don't think anything of it, not noticing how he doesn't even let anyone else come close to you.

Viktor's extremely observant. He'll be quick to find your weaknesses and insecurities. Every little detail is going to help him control you.

He can pretty much read your thoughts. Viktor will use that against you. He’ll be quick to figure out all of your likes, dislikes, interests, fears, traumas, everything. He knows you better than you know yourself.

He's a master manipulator. It doesn't matter if you don't like him or want to go out with him, because he will manipulate you into dating him. He would make you think like this was your idea, like you are the one who is all over him, obsessed with him and that you should be grateful that he's even giving you the time of the day. Don’t be surprised when you develop an inferiority complex.

I don’t blame anyone falling for him. He’s very charming and charismatic, and his kind, yet calculating eyes give no sign of a sinister, ulterior motive. He's Russia's pride, the golden boy. No one could ever suspect him of harbouring malicious intentions.

Viktor’s very self aware. He knows his limits, his abilities, what and how he can achieve the desired results. So, he knows exactly what to do to get you to do stuff for him. He knows how to play with your feelings, how to touch you, how to make you willing. 

He has very specific requirements for what he looks in a darling. And it doesn’t matter that you’re the exact opposite of his dream s/o, he’ll make you change. He’ll train you, tailor you to his tastes. The worst part is that you won’t even realise what he’s doing until its too late. 

Being so successful from a young age, he is quite rich. So he's always buying you these expensive gifts and you're not allowed to refuse them. He justs wants his baby to be spoiled. Honestly, they're just another tactic to keep you bound to him. You're not going to be ungrateful, right?

He’ll control every part of your life, no matter how insignificant. What clothes to wear, how to style your hair, what to eat, what colour should be your favourite, etc. Soon you won’t even be able to make a single a decision for yourself without your mind wandering to Viktor’s approval.

He likes making decisions for you. He wants to control every aspect of your life. And if you ever try to disagree with him, he'll be quick to gaslight you. His usually kind eyes will turn cold and uncaring in an instant and he'll crowd you as he asks you why you don't love him? Do you not trust your loyal, generous, fucking perfect boyfriend?

Viktor wants you to be present at all his games and practices. Whatever your engagements are, they are to be pushed back. That’s how it is. His needs before yours. Him before you.

He’s quite possessive of you. Viktor will make sure that you as well as everyone else know who you belong to. He hates it when you mention other people, no matter the gender. He wants to be the only one in your heart, mind and life. So he will definitely try to isolate you, going as far as to lock you inside his home with no way of contacting the outside world.

He likes showing you off. His perfect, little pet. And the way he keeps his arms around your waist, fools everyone into thinking that he’s in love with you. They always miss how scared you look, how you don’t let your eyes wander around anywhere but him, let alone leave his side, not even for a second. They don’t see how fake his smile is, or how he wants to slit everyone's throats who talks to you.

In front of public eyes or the paparazzi, he has taught you how to act. Wear his clothes, cheer him on, kiss him passionately, then bury your face in his chest. And then he will move his arms around you, letting his coat hide your cute face as he laughs charmingly at the shy, little thing you are.

Look, he's a narcissist yandere who's unhealthily possessive of you and wants you to be completely dependent on him for anything and everything, and will then also rub his forced affection in your face, telling you how you lucky you are to have someone as perfect as him in your life.

While his psychological punishments are enough to keep you in line, sometimes he does require the use of physical force. With all the years of skating, he knows exactly which muscle to pull or position your legs at angle that causes excruciating pain. Sometimes your ankle will only be sprained, but he’s not above breaking it either. He needs to tame his little kitten sometimes, you know?

In his own messed up way, he kind of does love you. He'll have his soft moments with you, moments where you forget about his bad side. He'll kiss you softly, hold you in his lap as he runs his hands through your hair. And when you're asleep, he'll become vulnerable and he'll mumble the loving words that you crave.

Will definitely make you skate with him. There's just something about seeing you in that tiny, pastel pink figure skating skirt, that just barely hides the curves of your cute butt. Doesn’t matter if you don't know how to skate, he'll be more than happy to teach you. Hands on your hips to steady you, he'll push himself against you, his large form completely engulfing you,and he coos in your ear about how well you're doing. He knows you thrive on his praise. 

“You’re doing so good, princess. So good for me. Maybe I should reward you tonight, hmm?”

Got some exciting Todoroki clan stuff coming up. Stay tuned! 💞💞

[quirklessidiot]

Title: blood son [oneshot; filthy rich sequel]  Pairing: millionare!sakusa kiyoomi x y/n [filthy capitalist au ft. kageyama tobio as your son] Genre: major angst ahead, thriller, yandere!au-ish

Synopsis: A full circle of madness finally comes to an end.

Warnings: sexual themes, rape, yandere behaviorisms (just some obsessive and disturbing stuff), very dark themes, anxiety, trauma, depression, eating disorder, unwanted pregnancy/children (y/n hates her kid here), suicide,  gaslighting, and Y/N’s decent to madness

Notes: happy 800 due to a lot of uh people asking for a short sequel, here it is...for better understanding, please read filthy rich skskksks anyways onto the story…i cant write smut for shit sIKE also fuck men and women like this, if you see them chok’em and chunk’em in the basin.  yes tobio is ur bby boy here idk kageyama and sakusa have the same energy i just couldnt resist i swear sksks

Filthy rich // series masterlist

A moan escapes your lips when you feel the hot liquid fill your hole, your expression is tantalizing and completely erotic. Something that he can’t seem to stop looking at, your body that was now a canvas of his marks, was a reminder that no one could have you. 

You're oblivious to it all, the things he did. The things he wanted to do to you, the dark thoughts, you were like a small rabbit in the den of a large wolf. Completely trusting, completely dumb and he’s taking advantage of it.

He stuffs and fills you up with his seed so that you’ll never leave him. 

He wants to breed you.

Your belly swelling with his children.

It was definitely a dream come true.

Your eyes snap back to reality as the bus stops in front of the new town, you had moved towns earlier since the town started to become a tourist destination. The idea of staying there would be too risky despite having the alias of Kageyama Miwa. You were still in hiding and you feared to even open the news despite it being eight years since you ran away.

“Okaasan, are we going to go down now?” a small voice asks.

You turn to find his son staring right at you, it had been a cruel reminder for him to look a lot like his father. You knew that he didn’t have any part in this, he was a victim just like you but you couldn’t help but be distant and not-so affectionate.

This was his kid.

His blood.

You couldn’t help but shrivel away.

“...Okaasan will just take her duffel bag on the overhead, just wait right behind me.” You say quietly. Tobio was a good boy, he was quiet and obedient. If the circumstances had been different, you’d adore him but every time you looked at him, all you saw was his wretched father and the unnamed things he did in the name of ‘love’.

To be honest, you didn’t know what else Sakusa did aside from trying to get you pregnant and holding you back from leaving. 

You didn’t even want to try to find out. If he was willing to go through such lengths to have you stay, it was more than enough reason to run away. You held onto your child’s hands as you made your way to your new home, it was smaller than the last one but this was alright.

It was clean and livable.

Tobio stays at the side, out of your way as you begin to fix up the house. The young boy isn’t social for his age towards his peers and you should be worried yet you can’t bring yourself to be, “Okaasan’s going to go to the grocery store, would you like anything?” you ask.

“Milk.”

“Alright, just stay here okay?”

He meekly nods as you awkwardly pat his head and  tie your roughly chopped hair in a tight ponytail, over the course of eight years, time has not been kind to you. You had grown unhealthily thin, probably lost some hair due to stress, and the bags underneath your eyes due to the lack of good sleep was evident.

You tell yourself that he isn’t looking for you now.

That he probably found a new plaything but you couldn’t help but look behind your shoulder every time. You didn’t even expect to get this far away, last you heard whilst you were at the station towards the last town eight years ago, you were being searched up and down by the police all over Tokyo.

You really thought you’d be found out and you feared for the worse but the farther you went, the less news reports you saw.

They probably thought you had died.

Which was good on your part that time because you’d rather be dead in a ditch than be caught up with a man like him again.

“...-Kusa Kiyoomi is expected to marry the daughter of Akiko Corp soon…”

You tense up at the mention of the very familiar name as you pass by the appliance store, shakily you turn to the tv screen to find a video of Sakusa Kiyoomi with a woman who had the same hair color as yours. Everything around you is muted now as his cold gaze fills the tv screen, your heart is thumping quick. 

He isn’t here.

He isn’t here.

“...It’s quite the love story of the century, don’t you think? After the disappearance of Kiyoomi’s beloved eight years ago, he met her a few years back and he seems to be doing well.” The tv anchor smiles on the screen as she talks to her co-host but inside you were shaking, what did happen to your missing person report? Curiosity starts to gnaw your insides as you head to the internet café before going to the grocery store.

You didn’t have the guts to look then but after seeing that report, you pull up on the secluded part of the internet café and search up your case. Your mouth dries up, the search was still on-going much to your surprise. There was even a website dedicated to it, “...Y/N L/N might be suffering from hysteria and psychological problems, please contact us immediately when you see her.”

Your eyes narrowed at the report as you shakily cup your mouth and choke back a laugh, that bastard really had the audacity to diagnose you with that when he was the one sick to the head.

Once again, the bile on your throat starts to pile up.

It still wasn’t safe.

You’d probably live your whole life on the run.

On the run with his son that scarily resembled him, how fucking cruel.

Sakusa Kiyoomi’s eyes glaze over the small town in discontent, apparently his bride-to-be wanted to get married here and who was he to refuse? All he wanted to do was get this over with so her father can shut up.

“Kiyoomi-san.” a small dainty voice calls out, he turns to his side to find (h/c) staring right at him. Akiko Hideyo is the daughter of one of the most powerful businessmen in Tokyo, he met her at a function a few years ago.

The very first time he saw her was from behind, it was a rather scary resemblance that he had to stop himself from approaching her by calling your name yet when he started to talk to her and hear her dainty voice, he realizes that she’s not even like you at all.

She was gentle and dainty like a deer.

Albeit his little bunny was gentle when they got together sometimes, he always recalled how you were filled with spunk. How you weren’t even afraid to put him in his place and how you were all over the place but seem to look beautiful whilst doing so.

He always recalled wanting to control you yet you never seem to succumb to it.

It had been eleven years since you first met, eight years since you had disappeared without a single trace and Sakusa is stuck with some third-rate look alike for relief. Every time they fucked, it was always from behind. Hideyo thinks it’s just his preference but in reality, it was because her back had such strong resemblance to you and he’d imagine every time that it was you.

He misses the roughness, the high, the erotica. 

The only things you could provide.

It was never enough, it was only you, you, and you.

“...Have you decided what flavor you wanted? Komori-san mentioned that you liked vanilla.” his fiancé meekly says.

Hideyo was boring.

Sometimes he wonders if he’s just doing this because he has never seen someone closely resembling you, “Anything would be fine.” He replied in a clipped tone. As the car comes to a halt for a moment because of a large truck backing from a driveway, his attention shifted towards a young boy bouncing a volleyball against the pavement outside his window. There are scratches on his knee cap yet the boy had a blank look on his face, he was sort of reminded of himself when he was younger.

As he was about to look away, he sees a woman approach the young boy and bends down to his level to check the scratches.

The woman’s small figure isn’t even the least bit familiar yet his attention can’t seem to go away. He watches her tuck the strand of stray hair and he finally gets a good look and it feels like the world stops turning at how the woman scarily resembles you. Albeit the figure was smaller and the hair was another color and unevenly chopped short.

It was no mistake.

“Y/N.” He mumbles yet as he’s about to open the door, the car starts to move. Kiyoomi’s fist tightens as he uncharacteristically yells at the driver to stop the car, Hideyo jumps on the seat and before she could say anything else, the business mongrel is out of the car, running to where you stood.

Yet just like a ghost, you were gone and so was the little boy who had oddly resembled him.

These days you had even a harder time sleeping. Maybe it was because there was a little leak on the ceiling, or better yet, maybe it was because the heater wasn’t working, or maybe it was because you were at a new place which made it harder to adjust.

You sat at the side with your expense book on hand, your gaze on his son who was peacefully asleep. Tobio was growing older soon and he needed to settle down at one place for high school and college. A part of yourself ventured deep and dark in your mind, the thought of leaving him at an orphanage seemed better now.

He had a fake last name anyways, the bastard wouldn’t be able to find him. 

You’d be doing this boy a favor since you never saw him as your kid and he’d be away from his very messy world.

Your thoughts are immediately disrupted when you hear a brief knock on the door. This made you tense up, it was late, Why would there be a need for visitors? Your son is quick to be awoken by the second knock and you immediately press your hand on his mouth and while your other finger is on your lips to signal him to keep quiet.

Another knock.

Tobio looks worried, it wasn’t his first time to see an episode from you but this time, something feels different. You're shaking more and you look like you’re about to pass out any moment. “Stay quiet.” you mouth as you crawl towards the door and press your ear on it to confirm who was on the other side, too afraid to even take a peak on the window.

Silence.

The only sound that could be heard was your thumping heart, Tobio had voluntarily placed a hand on his mouth to keep himself quiet.

Another knock.

You shut your eyes tight, praying to whatever god out there for this person to leave.

“...I don’t think anyone lives here.” You hear someone say on the other side, the voice sounded so familiar but you just couldn’t pinpoint who it was, this wasn’t Sakusa for sure,  “Are you sure that the information was right?”

Silence again.

“Hm.” The person hummed, knocking again, “Well, this place seems like a dead end. The landlady said that she’s not familiar with the tenants here so we could be wrong…”

The voice started to decrease and you feel yourself slowly starting to breathe easier. Tobio slowly put down his hand and there you saw it, the fear on his eyes. You breathe in and out, calming yourself, this place isn't safe anymore, “Tobio, take your bags. We’re leaving.” you only say.

You don’t even hesitate to leave despite it being the middle of the night.

Tobio is right in front of you as you go down your small apartment and you think everything is well, you really do yet luck didn’t seem to be on your side that night.

“...Y/N?”

A dreadfully familiar voice calls out, didn’t they leave? Why? why was he here?

“O-Okaasan.” Tobio mumbles, grabbing your hand and hiding behind you.

Your head hurts, you wanted to just be selfish and leave Tobio here with this man, his father, the wretched, vile creature who had betrayed you. You wanted to run.

You didn’t feel safe.

Sakusa Kiyoomi didn’t make you feel safe.

“Y/N…” He repeats, slowly approaching you, “It’s me, bunny.”

Oh, how you hated that pet name. It sounded like you were his plaything, like you could never escape from his set-up. Before you could say anything else, he invades your personal space once again and envelopes you in a very,very tight hug.

“I’ve missed you so, so much.” He whispers on your ear and your shivering, not from pleasure but from fear, “Shh, it’s alright. I found you. It must’ve been hard to be alone out here.”

Get away.

Get away.

“Get the fuck away from me.” You yell, pushing him off of you as you stagger away from him. Tobio remains behind you, completely shaking.

“Now, Y/N-” he tries to shush you, “We should go home now, you’ve spent so much time away from me but I understand, you were probably just scared to tell me you were pregnant, right?” 

He cups the right side of your face and places a chaste kiss on your temple, tears are threatening to spill as you realize that this was all over. You couldn’t escape now, this lunatic wouldn’t let you have at it.

The soft and plush bed is completely foreign to your back, Kiyoomi had you separated from Tobio because apparently you were still too ‘unstable’. It made you mentally scoff, between the both of you, he was the unstable one.

You wondered if they started to feed the small boy lies about you, Kiyoomi definitely milked it out to the press for sure. When he had found you, not only were your friends and family in a frenzy, the media was having a field day too. He had broken off the engagement and he used your ‘mental illness’ card on them and it worked.

Another story was weaved on papers, a love that transcended through time.

You let out a low sardonic laugh.

Mental Illness, you wondered if this could be a ploy for a suicide. After all, you’d rather be face first on the pavement than stay here with a son about to be fed on lies and a crazy bastard who sleeps next to you at night.

You stare out your window, the curtains were drawn as you looked at the free birds.

How envious.

“Y/N?” Kiyoomi comes in, a food tray in hand, “It’s time for dinner.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“Y/N it’s been two days, all you ate was an apple-”

“I’m not hungry.”

“Y/N, our son-”

“He was never my son.” You harshly snapback, your voice sharp, “He’s yours through and through, a fucking incarnate of you and a curse. He’s not mine. He never will be.”

You suddenly feel the presence of the small boy behind the door and there stands his boy, staring right at your eyes yet you feel nothing for him. You never felt anything for him. The moment they placed him on your arms to nurse, there was no joy nor light.

All he brought was a painful reminder.

Kiyoomi places the tray to the side and closes the door behind him, Tobio’s blank gaze still on you, “...Those aren’t words a child is supposed to hear, Y/N. Especially ours…” he inches closer and you clench your fist tightly and he places his hand on your neck and lightly holds it. 

You aren’t scared of him anymore, the nicest thing this guy could do was kill you, really.

“Maybe we should have a girl this time, hm?” his hand trails upwards to softly caress the side of your face.

You’re immediately frozen by his sudden choice of words, no, no-

“Maybe you’ll learn to love Tobio even more when you’re pregnant with another of mine-” before he could finish what he was about to say, you raise a hand and slap him right at his face, it must’ve been hard since it left a mark, “Ah, Y/N. I didn’t know you still liked it rough-”

“D-Don’t, I-I can’t get pregnant.” You're shaking this time as you try to come up with a lie, “I-I can’t…”

“Oh?” He tilts his head, “Why not?”

“I’ll die.” You lied, “When I had Tobio I almost died, my body couldn’t handle it. T-The doctor had said that if I were to have another, I’d die…”

The lie didn’t save you that moment, really. He has become an expert at detecting your lies so instead of a reply, he harshly places his lips on yours and despite protests, he just pins you down.

He’s harsh on you that night, spilling and stuffing you with his cum, whispering that you’ll have it all and that you’d be his everything but all you could do was let a small hiccup escape your lips as you tried to hold back your cries.

‘Someone, anyone, please.’ you pleaded internally.

You don’t see Tobio until a week later, the boy has grown a tad bit chubbier and is adorned with expensive clothes. Sakusa, on the other hand, has been force-feeding you to the point where you threw up right after meals (secretly, of course) 

You sit down at the couch as your son blinks at you, “...I’m sorry.” He breaks the silence and you shut your eyes tight as you recalled the harsh words he heard last week.

“I’m sorry too, Tobio.” you could only reply because genuinely, you did feel like you went too far this time. He didn’t choose to be born, a part of you should’ve saved him the misery and left him at the orphanage that time, “Do you hate me?” you ask.

“No.”

“You should.” You say quietly, “You should hate your otosan too.”

Tobio remains quiet at your words.

“When you grow older, don’t end up like him. don’t end up like us. forget us when you have the chance.”

“Okay.”

“Promise me.”

“I promise.”

“Good and If you ever get the chance to leave, promise me that you get out and don’t look back.”

Tobio may have been eight years old that time but he knows fear when he sees it and he knows promises aren’t meant to be broken. He remembers those words well because it was the last long conversation he has with you. 

The month of December rolls by and it’s cold, you’ve given up fighting back at this point. Your glassy eyes are directed to the window, not even wanting to look down at your bulging stomach. Kiyoomi doesn’t even need to tell you twice to not leave the house, you decide upon yourself to just stay at your room on bed the whole time.

You wonder, just how high is it from up here? Would it hurt?

“Y/N?” a dreadful voice calls out.

“Hm.” 

“You haven’t gone out of our room in two months. You haven’t even seen Tobio.” Sakusa points out, you were like a obedient doll now. So lifeless, so still, you wished he’d discard you already.

“I might say something again, I don’t want to bother.” You replied truthfully, gaze still avoiding his.

The raven-haired man starts to caress your plump face, you had grown chubbier since the beginning of your pregnancy, he couldn’t be anymore happier to finally be there for you.

This was perfect.

You were finally his.

You weren’t letting go.

“...Don’t you ever regret it?” You finally ask, turning to him, your blank eyes staring at his rather deranged ones, the eyes that you once loved was now just a reminder of your resentful life.

“Which one?” He asks, inching in closer to kiss your neck, your collarbone. You let out a meek sigh as you shut your eyes and internally prayed for this to be over quickly as he removes your ribbon that held your flimsy nightgown together.

“You killed people.” You uttered, “Took my life away, don’t you regret it?”

“Why would I?”

Right, how could a monster like him have such empathy? You feel his cold fingers brush against your folds, trying to stimulate it.

Everything except your body screamed no but you were just too powerless now. You wondered, how could you even end this all? Was jumping out the window the only solution now?

“...Right...” You let out a soft painful moan as he dips his finger inside. You’re under the idea that despite this happening countless of times, you’re body would be numb to it all yet each time it happens, it pains you even more,  “You even had to kill your ex-fiancé’s father for us to get married.”

You had come to realize just how deep his obsession was, the man was willing to kill to anyone who got in the way of your ‘love’. You remembered finding out about your ex-chief one night, about how he had chopped off his fingers and left him to bleed dry in the alleyway for the rats to feast on.

You remembered when a news came up that his supposedly future-father-in-law had died in a violent explosion during breakfast time and how he was nonchalant about it.

“...It’s all for you, Y/N.” He implores as he kissed your thighs and continue to stimulate your now wet folds, “All for you, Tobio, and my new little girl.”

“You’re sick.”

“Mhm. You smell good, I should continue using the soap from awhile ago when I clean you, right?” he hummed, ignoring what you had just said as he dipped his head in and take a kitten lick on your sex. You let out a small cry as your body betrayed you.

Your prayers for today are unheard yet again.

“...Y/N, you barely come out of your room these days.” Komori exclaimed, it turns out the visitor from last time who knocked on your door was him and as much as you wanted to knock his teeth out, you decide not to because you don’t see the point in doing violence these days.

“I’m tired.”

“Yeah, pregnancy does take a toll on your body.” He nods in agreement, it seemed like this was a casual thing for him, like you just weren’t repeatedly rape or mentally abused by his cousin, “Tobio certainly takes after his father, don’t you think?”

Your blood runs cold at the mention of the little boy, you had small hope for him either ways so you didn’t exactly cared for him anymore.

“I suppose so.” 

“You’ve gotten boring these days, Y/N.” Komori plainly pointed out, “It’s a wonder how my cousin gets to stick around ya. No offense.”

“None taken.”

Komori’s eyes narrowed at your hollowed response, you were so ungrateful. Here his cousin was, treating you with such delicateness and with all the attention that the other women wanted but you looked anything but happy about it.

If this was Hideko, she’d be elated.

But no, he had to be stuck with an ungrateful pompous bitch like you.

“How high up are we, Komori-san?” you suddenly ask.

He blinks at the rather weird question, “Fifty floors.”

“Hm.” You hummed, “That certainly is high.”

Komori would regret answering that question very soon though.

When the winter dawned upon a new year and you finally snap, you decide to answer your own prayers and opt to salvage yourself from this madness and cruelty once and for all.

Sakusa Tobio is nine years old when you, his mother, six months pregnant, jumped out the bedroom window from a fifty-foot story building two months into the new year. Your face is flat on the pavement and completely unrecognizable, the last conversation you both had replays on his head like a broken record through the years and only when he’s old enough that he realizes that he was no one’s son. 

His okaasan didn’t loved him nor did he want to be associated with his father for all he did was bring pain and disgust.

The boy is eighteen, fresh out of the academy, right in front of his baby sister’s and your mausoleum. He makes it a habit to visit you both a day before your death anniversary,  not wanting to be in the same room as his father yet this year he makes an exception.

Recently, he had turned over some evidence and his own testimony about what his father had been doing. Everything, from illegal works to the people he killed to your tragic end. It’s enough to file a case and have him set to jail for life, even his fancy lawyers couldn’t defend him. 

His lips sting because his Uncle Komori had punched him in the face and called him an ungrateful bastard like you but it was alright.

It was all over.

He plans to change his name back to Kageyama Tobio (the haux name you had given him when you were on the run) right after all the fiasco, it’s a kind name and the first name you had given him, he likes to think that this was also a gift from you that time, a new beginning straying away from you and his father's cruel ties. He had also felt that it was too unkind for him to use your last name despite his grandparents' persistence (he was after all, conceived through forceful means).

And although he wanted to hate you for those words you said that time when he was eight. He couldn’t really bring himself to after hearing what you had to go through, you were a victim. He couldn’t dare imagine what his father did to you during the last few months leading to your death.

Yet, right now. It was finished.

You could rest now.

“I did it, Y/N-san.” He mumbles as he bows down. As he got older, he has also foregone the idea of calling you by the name you loathed and shriveled away from, “I got out and I didn’t look back. Thank you for everything.”

Kageyama Tobio never visits you right after again, as promised.

[venusluvrr]

The Psychological Horror Manhwa “Killing Stalking” is not a Romance, but an Emotional Series Depicting the Codependent Relationship Between Two Ill Individuals

Content Warning!!: contains mentions of sexual abuse (rape) and mental illness.

Killing Stalking is an immensely twisted webcomic series, mainly popular within the Yaoi community for its boy on boy focused plotline. The story follows characters Yoon Bum (Bum), a shy, scrawny young man with a haunting past filled with abuse, and Oh Sangwoo (Sangwoo), a younger man who also has a quite damaging upbringing but masks it perfectly with his vibrant, extroverted personality. After being saved from a rape attempt during his time serving in the military, Bum develops a crush on his saviour, Sangwoo, from which an unhealthy obsession starts to arise and he eventually finds himself locating and breaking into the man’s home one day when he’s out. When he does, he discovers a terribly injured woman being held captive in his basement, and with further evidence, soon comes to the realization that his crush is actually a serial killer -- hence the name “Killing Stalking,” as Sangwoo kills and Bum stalks. For a very specific reason though, Sangwoo decides not to kill the man that had been stalking him, and instead holds him hostage in his custody. From here, the story goes into exceeding depth of the abnormal, toxic, and manipulative relationship the two form during their time spent together. By just the mere description of it, it’s a bit concerning to know that a large portion of readers still support Sangwoo and Bum’s relationship. In other words, they believe they truly loved each other and that the story was not only horror fiction but a romance as well. One could easily come to this conclusion by basing their relationship on the few parts within the novel where they showed affection towards each other -- for example when Bum allows Sangwoo to hug him to sleep when he suffered through the night, or my personal favourite, when Sangwoo buys Bum a stuffed frog keychain after finding out that he had an affinity for such creatures. But we cannot simply dismiss the underlying factors of their relationship because of some cute things they did that made our heart melt -- Sangwoo still abused Bum at his leisure which makes those moments quite meaningless in the sense of it all. What Sangwoo and Yoonbum shared can’t be classified as “love,” because even with their peculiar bond and endearing moments, the psychological damage they both endured played a bigger part in the way they perceived each other.

Many toxic relationships start out lovely and glamorous until the couple have become comfortable enough to start revealing some bad habits, but in Sangwoo and Bum’s case, they were already off to a bad start, as the reason they remained with each other was solely for reasons pertaining to their poor mental health.

At the time Sangwoo saved Bum in the military, Bum still suffered from Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) -- a disorder he inferrably developed due to the fact that he grew up being constantly physically and sexually abused by the people around him. People with this illness may easily develop an infatuation for a person who shows them even the least bit of care; It can reach the point where they begin to idolize them and see them almost as a perfect human being -- which is exactly how Bum viewed Sangwoo after he helped him to escape a rape attempt. The likely specific term for what Sangwoo was to Bum is a Favourite Person (FP). To an individual suffering from Borderline Personality Disorder, their FP is everything -- their self-worth, identity and emotional dependency all rely on this one person, making them the center of their lives. In contrast to this sincere fondness, the only reason Sangwoo kept Bum alive was because of the man’s resemblance to his late mother -- the one person in his life who he truly loved. While his father was abusive and negligent, his mother tried her best to care for her son even while her own mental stability wasn’t so great either. Even though it was implied that he was responsible for the murder of both his mother and father in high school -- getting away with it scotch-free because of how perfectly executed his plan was -- he still shared a special bond with the woman, allowing her existence follow and continue to torutue him mentally as he grew older. When he saw Yoonbum, he felt as if she had been somewhat resurrected, or at least he could pretend so by dressing him up in his mother’s clothes and making him cook and do the chores; He also played the husband role by abusing and assaulting Bum just as his father did to his mother -- mostly just out of his own nature. Sangwoo had his own issues, “mommy issues,” and he initially needed to keep Bum alive so he could fulfill his own longing desires. Knowing the man’s character though, things wouldn’t end there and instead headed down a very gruesome and frightful path.

The very reasons that the two were drawn to each other we’re even more evident the longer they lived under the same roof. While Yoonbum continued to recall the perfect image he had of Sangwoo in his head, Sangwoo continued to manipulate the man in order to satisfy his own needs. A healthy relationship cannot be based on deceit, because one person will end up victimized instead of loved.

Oh Sangwoo is a sadistic sociopath with a history of kidnapping, abusing, raping and torturing innocent people, and because of his illness, he shows feels and shows no remorse for his actions and even proceeds to kill off his victims as they pleaded in objection. What some people don’t understand is that when Sangwoo met Bum, the only reason he treated him differently was not because he thought of him as special, but because he had a personal agenda that included making Bum think that was the truth and that he was indeed the favoured victim among many. It’s no surprise with the man’s manipulative personality that he would enjoy planting a lie in Bum’s head to make him stay and continue to do as he says, and this is confirmed whenever he returned back to his old destructive habits even after showing the man acts of affection. Yes, Sangwoo spared Bum’s life, clothed him and fed him, but as their bond grew, his narcissistic attitude was still more apparent than ever.

Upon meeting Bum for the first time, Sangwoo didn’t hesitate to aggressively break his ankles to prevent his mobility, he left the man within the dark confinement of his basement for a certain period of time before letting him out only after he had gained his trust. He made him sit in a chair to wash dishes and make dinner because he could no longer stand. Sangwoo also constantly dragged Bum down with derogatory words and statements every chance he could get, this included calling him a “retard,” and referring to him as a “disgusting” and “filthy” human being. As confirmed by the author, Sangwoo is also heterosexual, which is further proved by the homophobic remarks he made towards a significantly older man who was sexually attracted to him while murdering him with Bum’s aid. This fact alone is another one that should justify a strong point that demonstrates the true hostility of their relationship -- Yoonbum never gave his consent to have sex with Sangwoo, nor did he allow it to happen because “he wanted it.” He specifically used phrases such as, “No,” “Stop,” and “It hurts,” implying that sometimes there was no mutual agreement when they had sex and Sangwoo had actually raped him several times.

People with Borderline Personality Disorder have been reported to have difficulties seeing the faults in their partner -- this explains why Bum still held on to him. He chose to stay when he had the chance to escape, and with tears rolling down his face from excruciating pain he still told Sangwoo he loved him. In a scene where Bum is left alone with the police as they investigate the suspicions they have surrounding him, he questions them saying, “Could you kiss somebody like me? Could you love somebody like me?” As he believes nobody but Sangwoo could answer yes to those two questions, convinced that Sangwoo really does have feelings for him. It’s saddening to know that the poor man had successfully been lured into a trap, and because of his mental health it would be much harder for him to realize it.

To the readers that think, “Sangwoo and Yoonbum needed each other,” -- You’re not completely wrong. They did need each other in the way that they found somewhat of a saneness from each other’s presence, each using one another to each other’s benefit. But being together at the same time built on their insanity, as the presence of Sangwoo’s mother seemed to grow even more prevalent with Bum, who resembled her, also in the picture, and Yoonbum growing so unhealthily attached to Sangwoo that he constantly feared of abandonment and turned the sociopath into the only source of his happiness. They needed each other, but not for the right reasons. They were attached to each other, but there was no love, otherwise it would reflect throughout the story. One of the most debate-worthy scenes that challenge this fact is when Sangwoo is reported by an old lady in the hospital, the one that had ended his life, that he was calling out Bum’s name throughout the night as he lay in his deathbed. Those were his final words, and Yoonbum’s final word was also Sangwoo’s name before he was very well implied to have been hit by a car while he chased an illusion of the man he “loved.” Even I almost felt that this was solid proof that even through the tough and terrible of their relationship, deep inside, the two really were in love but could not express it in the right way due to their mental health issues -- after all, what someone makes of their final moments before death is much more meaningful than most of what they've done in their life entirely. But I came to realize that the only way I could support this relationship would be if they had met in an alternate universe where they did not suffer from such dreadful childhood trauma that made them into the hurting individual they had become before meeting each other. As difficult as it is for me to picture the two with different partners, it would be best if the two had not met at all as they only fed into the severity of their conditions.