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sailormew4 · 6 months ago

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Fanfic Writer Interview

Thankyouuu to @earthtodora for the tag!!

Tagging: @m34gs and @vulpixen

wow this one is a bit long oops.

How many works do you have on ao3?

I have 28 works currently on ao3!

Your top 5 stories by kudos/likes:

Outside In: One, if not the first BNHA fic I uploaded. I'm honestly surprised this one is the one that made start to get known in the BNHA fic atmosphere. The plot is based on that one Teen Titans episode where Beast Boy and Cyborb go into Raven's mind. This time, Bakugo, Uraraka, Todoroki, and Iida go into Midoriya's mind. This is BakuDeku Fic. Fun Fact: This is actually the first time I did something like this, in fact I did something similar for the Voltron fandom right here on Tumblr. Status: Complete

Add Water: THIS IS MY SECOND MOST KUDOS FIC? So context: This is an H2O: Just Add Water x Voltron crossover fic. The premise is Lance is the grandson of Cleo and Lewis from the original H2O series. It's still canon compliant so he's in space trying to hide his mermaid secret from everyone. Gosh, this right season three I wrote this, I haven't touched this fic since 2018 (Voltron Depression am I right?). I might actually go back to my VLD fics. This one does contain Klance. Status: Ongoing.

Mariposa: A MIRACULOUS FIC? DAMN I DIDN'T TOUCH THIS SINCE 2019! So, typical Marinette gets akumatized cause GOD DAMN IT I STILL NEED THIS! I want her to reach her villain era lowkey and give Chat Noir the spotlight he STILL deserves. Status: Ongoing

Friendship in Flames and Curses - OHOHO! Now this one I hoped would be in top five. This is simply a crossover between Blue Exorcist and Jujutsu Kaisen. Rin gets taken by Sorcerers by mistakenly being seen as Curse User. Him and Itadori becomes BESTIES! The comments in this became so crazy, I recently finished this not too long ago on 11/18/24. No focused romantic relationships until the sequel (currently in the works). But I love this fic SO MUCH. Status: Complete

Forget About Love: - Oh my gosh, I'm exposing my Klance Days. This is probably one of the few Klance fics I finished. The premise is after Keith leaves for the Blade of Marmora, Lance is hurt and misses him to the point he takes a potion to make him forget the hurt which makes him forget Keith and his love for him - which fundamentally changes for the worse. Fun Fact: The title comes from an Aladdin 2 song, but the premise is inspired by an episode from the show of Once Upon a Time. Status: Complete.

Do you respond to comments? Why/why not?

I LOVE responding to comments. I used to reply every chance I got to them, but took only replying after I update the fic. I got tired of constantly getting comments to update. But, I always screenshot my favorite comments.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angriest ending?

... define angry ending? Cause I can tell you which fic I wrote with the most anger? I always strive to have happy endings, maybe bittersweet. But the only one I can confidently say I wrote in anger was my fix-it fic for Voltron Season 8 End to a Beginning. That shit I wrote almost 22k words from spite from the finale. I still plan to update it cause I was really excited but uh chapter two is still kicking my ass.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

Well, almost all of them have a happy ending. I would say the most happy would be either JJK x Blue Exorcist fic cause its a happy note and had a pretty humorous ending, but there is also my UsaMamo fic Homey Touches where Mamoru realizes Usagi makes his home.

Do you write crossovers?

HA! Did you read my top five? Two of them ARE crossover fics, well they're more AU adjacent kinda. You'll see what I mean. Some others ones I've written are

Legacy of the Moon: A Sailor Moon X BNHA fic. After the death of Sailor Moon, another thousand years passed and Luna finds Bakugo and says he's Sailor Moon, but he refuses to believe it. A BakuDeku focused fic as well. It's still ongoing and the latest chapter is currently being written

An Alien Device: A BNHA x Ben 10 fic. In the summer before the last year of middle school Midoriya is forced to go on a vacation with Bakugo and his Dad. On the first night, an alien device crashed landed to reveal the Omnitrix and stuck itself upon Izuku's wrist. This is also BakuDeku.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

... have I? This is a genuine thing. I'm mostly bad with social cues, so I could never tell if something was out of hate or confusion. I probably did, but just don't remember it or simply ignored it.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I.... do not. It's mostly because smut itself to me is kinda just... there. Maybe its the demisexual in me, but when I read fics that have smut. I do kinda just... skim it over. Like I'll read it for the genuine emotion but not the actual well physical stuff.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

If I did, I do not know. I do know that I have a now long abandoned fanfiction.net account (I should move some of my How to Train Your Dragon fics I had there to Ao3). But if I did, I don't know about it.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

... I have been offered. One of my fics was offered, but I had to turn it down cause it wasn't going to be published on Ao3 but a different sight. I just didn't feel comfortable with the idea of having it out there without me knowing what's going on.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes, why with @vulpixen with a Gravity Falls fic. I was in high school, so I couldn't write as much as I wanted and since I was using her OCs we decided to just co-write together. She did most of the heavy lifting while I did most of editing and stuff. I'm always open to now co-write more often now, in fact I did have a fic being written with Codi ( @collisiondiscourse ) for a BNHA fic. But they're busy with Uni. They do draw me the most amazing cover art for some of my fics tho!

What’s your all-time favorite ship?

... Soooo this is kinda a loaded question. See, I don't have a singular OTP that dominates. I have a Mount Rushmore where I will eat any content of them like its the most delicious bowl of curry ever and it influences all future ships. Those being UsaMamo aka Usagi Tsukino/Sailor Moon and Mamoru Chiba/Tuxedo Mask. This was the start and I will always think of them when comparing any current ships I have. Next would be of course BakuDeku aka Bakugo Katsuki and Midoriya Izuku from BNHA. I don't think I need to explain this one. This sucker got me by the neck when Kacchan got kidnapped and I ain't ever leaving. Next is Klance aka Keith and Lance from Voltron Legendary Defender. By god, if you see me now and think "Wow she's super into BakuDeku"... you have not seen me at my most FERAL and potentially insane. In fact, I did not realize how much this ship STILL holds me its claws until the recent news of it being taken off of Netflix. And the final one *drumroll* is MadoHomu aka Madoka Kaname and Homura Akemi from Madoka Magica. Now this ship, while I don't talk about as often as I like is because their story is still going and I want to see how it ends. Doomed Yuri at its finest.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Any fic, I haven't updated before 2023. I love all my fics to bits but sometimes, hyperfixations come and go. I do plan eventually especially with my resurgence of Klance love, but it might be a while.

What are your writing strengths?

I think its dialogue. I often say my own dialogue aloud when writing to get the tone right. Plus, I'm very much a word person. So I think is my best.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Probably a lot. I know I'm my own worse critic, so I'm harsh. One that I try is conveying words through actions or setting the scene essentially. I can't quite get the tension right in my opinion, but maybe that's because I know how it ends. I haven't really asked what it could be from others.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

So I watch anime and read manga. So my thought process is write how the character would think, so for example in my anime fics, I use honorifics if the character does in speak, but in thought its just the name. When there's multiple language at play like say my Voltron fics where I make Lance use Spanish, I just use the Spanish and give translations at the bottom.

What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?

So damn, can I say any of the ships I have yet to write for or ones that have like "dead" fandoms. Take Tokyo Mew Mew for example, I want to write an IchiSaya (Ichigo Momomiya x Masaya Aoyama) fic so bad because back in my middle school days THAT was the rare pair despite being canon.

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Oh definitely Legacy of the Moon and Friendship in Flames and Curses. I love Sailor Moon and BakuDeku so much and that one is still so fun to write. As for my JJK x Blue Exorcist Fic, that one is simply fun to just write and have fun with no boundaries, like its purely self indulgent. You can probably tell how much I enjoy a fic by how fast I update.

#mewie posts #mewie writes #mewie answers #tag game #my fic #bnha #bakudeku #voltron #klance #miraculous #jjk #blue exorcist

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failfemme · 1 year ago

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the NO-SKIP albums: a tag game 🎶

tagged by @sophelstien like a week ago oops

rules: share the albums that you can listen to nonstop. those lightning in a bottle-albums that scratch ur brain just right. every siuungle track, an absolute banger. u could not skip one if u tried. no notes. stunning, show-stopping, immaculate. ur no-skip albums. 🔎 bonus & optional (but imo, v fun) rules:1) add a track rec for us to listen to! AND2) share ur favorite line(s) from that track! 👀

tagging @charaznablescanontoyota @oatplant @kelpforestdwellers @tendercoretroglodyke

wee commentary and song recs below the cut

plans by death cab for cutie

(plans turns 20 next year. every night since i realized this, i have wished on a star that they will make one of those star-studded cover albums like tegan and sara’s the con x or the metallica blacklist. @ ben gibbard do you hear me!!!!!!!!)

song rec: summer skin is such a simple, evocative poem of a song

seven swans by sufjan stevens

(this album makes me feel like i am staring into a maelstrom. a banjo is something that can be so personal.)

song rec: for a good mood, to be alone with you. for melancholy, seven swans.

so jealous by tegan and sara

(baby’s first queer media. relic of my emotionally turbulent “girls kissing” youtube searches era and also of my later emotionally turbulent girl kissing era.)

song rec: speak slow kind of exemplifies what i love about this era of tegan and sara- so punchy and fun and fast.

be the cowboy by mitski

(if you haven’t grasped by now that i am basic idk what to tell you. the thing is, it’s good.)

song rec: it’s gotta be geyser. the way she talks about her relationship to her craft both in the song and in interviews is so real.

carly rae jepsen free space

(this was my solution to not fill up the whole entire meme with crj. both sides of emotion and dedicated are no-skips, and kiss and the loneliest time are like. one song away.)

song rec: go listen to crj’s critically acclaimed song store. right now.

pity boy by mal blum

(i’ve been a mal blum fan for a long time, and it has been such a delight to get to witness their musical growth, including their voice changing. their raw, crackly vocals compliment these songs so well. getting to scream sing along with a bunch of queer punks at their concert last summer was cathartic.)

song rec: if you have a large group of homos to sing along with, i don’t want to. if not, salt flats.

art angels by grimes

(do i have to give the disclaimer that annoying ppl can make really good art sometimes. no. you understand.)

song rec: i haven’t actually listened to this album in ages, but i feel like pin was one of my faves. also venus fly with janelle monae.

talon of the hawk by the front bottoms

(tease me all you want. be the 10th person to send me the “i recorded myself calling ex-girlfriends on edibles and accidentally made a tfb album” meme. i am cringe, and i am free. hold my hand. let’s drive around doing our best brian sella impressions at top volume.)

song rec: are you an emotional baby boy? of course you are, you’re listening to the front bottoms. santa monica time.

tracy chapman by tracy chapman

(this album has everything. romantic ballads. politically charged slow songs. politically charged upbeat songs. nostalgic memories of listening to this cassette in my ex’s truck while we drove around our college town. there’s a reason i’m always screaming about how ppl should listen to more than fast car.)

song rec: for my lover is both politically charged and romantic. it is also: catchy as hell.

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ecoxlar-arts · 1 year ago

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excited about the memories series! i wanted to test something for you because you were worried about the image limit and i found out you can upload up to THIRTY images in a single post, it's just ten to a single images widget in a post. if you click off to the blank space where you would type afterward you can add another batch of images by clicking the camera icon. you can do this however often you'd like to arrange the images, just know that you're hardcapped at thirty images. hope this helps and i don't sound too pushy or weird. anyway keep on ryminin'.

!!!!!!!! The amount of joy this ask brought me is immeasurable!!! You don't sound pushy or weird at all, don't worry! I'm utterly over the moon that someone out there is excited about the series! Thank you, anon~♡

((It's only now that I'm realizing I never tagged the post with the name of the fic/au it's for oops!!))

Anyway, thank you very much for checking the image limit, and I'll definitely have to try that out~☆

#eco echos #and if you were unaware the fic the series is for/based on (It’s nothing at all) is posted on ao3 #its not fully finished yet but #my art #infinity train #ryan akagi #rymin fanfic #its nothing at all

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aromantic-luigi · 11 months ago

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hi op!! i hope you dont mind me adding my thoughts, i was typing this in the tags and then realized theyd be a little too long oops

i think you have a great point there. aromanticism and asexuality are seperate identities, although, they still do have many similarities, not only in concept but especially in the way theyre treated by society.

in my opinion, its a bit disrespectful and diatasteful to tag specifically aro posts as ace, especially when the people posting them are asking others not to. i think that the issue is that asexuality has been talked about a lot more in more recent years; not nearly enough as it should be, though its included in a lot of flag displays and pride merch and theres been a good handful of canonically ace/ace coded characters in media. the issue is that aromantcism is hardly talked about or recognized, and aro representation, especially characters who are allosexual and aromantic, are incredibly rare. asexuality is a bit more digestible for people, as the idea that sex is sinful and gross is already deeply rooted in society (not to say that we ace people have it easy - theyre still shamed for it and face oppression, though people are at least a little more accepting of it). Aroaceness is another step from that. People find it weirder, since the idea of not feeling either of those types of attraction is baffling to people, but it still makes somewhat sense, so people are often accepting of that as well. the problem is that people have a very hard time accepting alloaro people, since how on earth can someone feel sexual attraction but not romantic attraction? sex is considered a sin and youre honorable if you never have it, though romance is overglorified and, well... romanticized, lol. society describes it as pure and wholesome and wonderf and neccessary and ideal!! (and of course, this leads to very harmful stereotypes about alloaro people.) asexual flags are common, though i hardly ever see aromantic flags in flag displays, pride merch, or even queer-made pride items.

thats why its frustrating to see specifically aromantic posts tagged as asexual. while many people in the aspec community identify as both, its isolating to the people who dont.

i feel like adding asexual experiences onto aromantic posts is a bit of a gray area. again, youre absolutely right - there are many similarities in aromanticism and asexuality where it makes sense to relate the experiences of the two. but at a certain point, its almost as if all aro posts are now aroace posts. (in contrast, ive seen way more ace-specific posts than aro-specific posts.) its a problem when aromanticism is only ever accepted when coupled with asexuality, while asexuality is frequently talked about often with emphasis on "asexual people can still be romantic, by the way :)!"

so... honestly i cant really say that its right or wrong to add onto aro posts. adding aro experiences onto ace posts? i would argue thats perfectly fine, unless the poster says otherwise, only because asexuality is more represented. of course im not saying anyone is evil or has any bad intentions when adding onto aro posts, i dont believe anyone means any harm when adding ace experiences, but i hope it makes sense why aromantic people are a little frustrated when all of their experiences are always equated to being aroace. its a little disheartening when people cant have their own space even in online spaces theyve tried to make for themselves, yknow? just my two cents :] i am only one person, my opinion is not fact obviously and i hope im not coming off that way!!!

(this is all written by an aroace person, if that means anything. im not here to pick sides - im on both!)

It's so frustrating how aromantic people and asexual people have been divided in the community because we refuse to respect how these identities relate and how they are different. How hard is it to respect a "do not tag with ace" at the bottom of an aro post, but equally not refusing to let aro posts be derailed by an ace viewpoint when that is simply the nature of this website and how posts are made. You guys know we both exist in the same space and we can be respectful of each others boundaries while also not closing each other off completely by acting like there is no correlation in experience at all?

Of course if nothing else is added it's disheartening to see someone tag something unrelated. But also why are people so against someone changing the conversation to something that is related or similar? I don't understand how you people are so against conversations?

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tuiyla · 3 years ago

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I’m VERY curious about your new midnights gif!! You said you have a lot of thoughts about making it, could you give us a rundown of them?

Oh bless you sweet Anon I'd love to! I was gonna tag rant in the post itself but gifsets often see the tags copied entirely in reblogs so I wanted to save everyone that trouble. I'd love to give a rundown thank you for enabling me lol. Long post ahead but most of it under the cut. Be sure to share any thoughts you have Anon! Or anyone else, talk to me for a potential part two lol.

After seeing the post that I linked to as inspo I know I wanted to do a similar thing for Glee but I'm still just getting into Midnights and wasn't sure about assigning songs to characters. I've made a post or two asking people for their input so I'd like to shout out @sopheadraws for suggesting Sweet Nothing for Brittana on premiere day, @secretlesbianspy for Blaine and Anti-Hero, and for You're On Your Own, Kid @rachelberryy for Rachel and @katyobsesses for Marley. I ended up straight up ignoring a lot of what people have suggested oops haha but I agreed with these pairings. And then it was a matter of choosing 6-7 to actually gif and as I was doing some of them more connections started forming.

So, I start thinking about which Midnights songs to do and immediately I know that Maroon has to be on there because Quinntana doing that is my strongest association. This was fairly straightforward as I had the characters in mind, obviously had a colour set and knew that it would be I Do Quinntana scenes. I briefly thought of other ones but it's always obvious with Quinntana, isn't it?

I liked the imagery of Maroon and lines like "Your roommate's cheap-ass screw-top rosé, that's how" and "I wake with your memory over me // That's a real fucking legacy, legacy (It was maroon)". That latter one made it to the gif though a shortened version because space. I preferred to include the hopeful and less bitter half - well, maybe not hopeful. But the impression that despite the passion and even recklessness of the song it can be something lasting which is what I wish Quinntana was. Taylor songs and Quinntana deserve their own post but I just think the complexities of Maroon fit them well and it has that sort of sexual yet tender quality that's perfect for their two-time (sadly not continued) thing. And as for the gif itself, I'm forever obsessed with shots of them while slow dancing, that contemplation and ease before they throw themselves at each other. But I'm also very glad to have decided at the last minute to include an in-bed shot. I think it adds to the lyric "I wake with your memory over me". Not that they slept that much that night in the first place.

Next was Anti-Hero, which as mentioned I was convinced of for Blaine but long before that I'd already made up my mind that it was a Santana song, too. This a) works well for @secretlesbianspy haha but also b) fits my vision of trying not to make them all solos. That second half worked a little too well because almost all ended up being duets oops but I just think that assigning songs as solos is a little too limiting and duets and group numbers potentially offer more interesting interpretations. And so we have a Blaintana duet that takes place in an interspersed sort of non-diegetic way with both lamenting their lives separately but reaching similar conclusions.

In my mind this would take place at some point in season 4 or 5. I think it mostly fits Blaine in season 4 as he regrets having cheated on Kurt and crumbles under the realization that he can’t be Mister Perfect, maybe leaning into the “oh I’m the bad guy I ruin things” aspect a little too much. Like the dramatic little boy he is. Hence the clip chosen being from Hopelessly Devoted to You. As for Santana, I really like this shot from right before Girl On Fire starts playing because even though that’s ultimately a triumphant moment, it does come after the realization that she has to choose the real world. Over Kentucky, over Lima, over running back to the familiarity of Brittany, she has to choose taking that leap and truly living. And that’s terrifying when she doesn’t believe in herself. That leads us into season 5 which would fit Anti-Hero even more, when her insecurities cause her to go behind Rachel’s back and she doubles down on her bitch persona in the face of Rachel assuming the worst of her. The song fits her better in season 5 when she has that degree of introspection and also guilt about her past behaviour, so I did consider a pre-Be Okay clip where she and Rachel make peace. Ultimately, for aesthetic reasons this worked better but yeah I’m basically thinking New York Santana for this one. Actually you know what here’s a version of this with that alternate clip, as a treat (also different Blaine shot). Not fully coloured and finished so treat it as a discarded draft.

Phew told you this would be long, here comes song number three. As mentioned, You’re On Your Own, Kid read as both a Rachel and Marley song to me so it was an easy decision to use at least Rachel’s clip from their canon duet, New York State of Mind. That gave the whole thing a nice orange colour which worked for the warm to cold colour gradient that was starting to form. Beyond looking good, I chose the Rachel clip as it represents the start of her new life in New York and her stepping into her own. For Marley, a clip from Wrecking Ball fit not only because it had that orange hue but because it was her realizing she couldn’t trust Jake and thus was “on her own.”

The parallels between Rachel and Marley are interesting and less obvious than those between other OGs and their newbie counterparts, but that’s another whole post right there. What makes me think of the two in terms of this song is that vibe of wanting to escape your hometown, feeling insecure there, yearning for a love that will potentially make you stay. Finn and Jake, respectively, neither of whom end up being The One for the girls. And arguably, both Rachel and Marley are better off having had their hearts broken and realizing that they won’t be saved by some popular guy who choose them. “Like I'd be saved by a perfect kiss.” It’s a bittersweet realization that they have to rely on themselves but also empowering for both of them when they step out of previous roles and take charge. Rachel makes it in New York and Marley pursues her passion, supported by but not reliant on Jake or anyone else. Everything you lose is a step you take. Romantic heartache built their character.

Next up was Lavender Haze, which ended up less of a character analysis choice and more just what would be fun if they performed it on the show. From the beginning I had Quinn in mind and then Tina was added for some Quinntina fun, and though I debated until the end I ended up including Mercedes because that’d be an awesome trio.

I wasn’t hell bent on including this in the set but at this point I realized these were the first 5 tracks of the album bar one (more on that in a bit) and I just like the idea of the three girls owning this song. Again, this has less profound reasoning and is more vibes based, but I’d like to think that this is their way of establishing their own agency in their respective relationships and in general lives. All three have been stripped of agency one way or another, often relating to relationships, and this is them saying that they just wanna do what they wanna do. All have previously given a damn as to what people say, to varying degrees, but in a sort of #girlboss move they band together and defy that. I was also originally thinking of turning it into a romantic Quinntina AU thing, before I made the choice to include Mercedes. Read it in that way if you’d like. I just like the vibes of this one basically even if I like this gif the least. It could have maybe used more work but to be honest this was one of the ones I wasn’t that invested in.

Now that I’ve realized I had tracks 1-3 and 5 on here, I thought, okay, let’s get Snow On The Beach up on here. Mostly because at this point I knew I wanted The Great War in here so it could be a “the first 5 tracks + 1 extra from 3am” sort of thing. But then Sweet Nothing happened, more on that in its own section.

So, Snow. I went back and forth but upon the 10th or so listen I decided on Samcedes. It was that “falling in love at the same time” message that settled it because I don’t think the same can be said for any other couple. And I like the whole “yeah it’s unlikely but it works and it’s beautiful” vibe plus the chosen lyric really settled it. I look back on Prom Queen as one of my favourite Samcedes moments, their origin story and something that really sells me on this song being the one for them. The chosen lyric reflects Mercedes’ initial insecurity but also how they both felt at some point, yet everything still fell into place and they still worked, for the time that they did. It’s that magical vibe that I associate with their first evening together.

With the first five down I knew I wanted a plus one, that ending up being The Great War for Klaine. I initially thought of Labyrinth but that didn’t feel quite right and looking over the lyrics of The Great War did. Frankly I’m surprised to see sets of Klaine with other songs and not this. I didn’t want to include songs from 3am at first but this fit them and the plus one theme so The Great War it was. Initially in a turquois colour but yellow won out.

More so than any other song on the album, it’s the message of overcoming difficulties and still ending up together that makes it a Klaine one for me. Their struggles and the fact that they overcame them is often stated as a reason why people are drawn to their story and in all its angstiness I think this song describes that. Overall there are a lot of bittersweet songs on this album and ones of heartbreak and lost potential, whereas Klaine are about overcoming, so. And the bg clip is of them getting back together in A Wedding whereas the second one of from the last episode, right before we see them 5 years later as a representation of that overcoming. Once I chose the lyric I also thought of and made an alternate version for the second clip being their wedding kiss and thematically I still like that better but this worked better aesthetically.

So, we have the first five and even the plus one but hold it, I couldn’t just do a Midnights set, potentially my only one without including the association between Sweet Nothing and Brittana. The more I listened to this song the more I liked it for my favourite couple. Did it mess a bit with my original colour scheme, yes, and did I feel a bit weird including Santana three times, maybe. But at the end of the day these are my choices and I’ll choose Santana any day, so. Even though it makes the thematically organized part of my brain mad I had to include this.

This fuchsia colour really makes sense for them imo (even though I also tried it in yellow), the colour I usually associate them with. The wholesome and calm domesticity of the song immediately reminded me of season 6 fluff Brittana. I thought of a season 1 clip as well that I had on stock for, uh, other TS set reasons (coming soon) but I decided on season 6 choices. The hug from 6x06 has such a wholesome vibe to me and is easy to work with, and then choosing their little moment from Home was also easy. As they share this adorable moment they sing “there ain’t nothing that I need” which feels very fitting with Sweet Nothing, and of course the feeling that they’re each other’s home. All of this felt so right to me that despite it throwing off the little theme I planned for the set I couldn’t not include it. Having this Brittana association exist was more important than some arbitrary theme to the set that still sort of exists anyway. Very happy with this song and scenes choice.

Aaaand that is mostly it, though I also have thoughts on Midnight Rain which I almost included as a Finchel song. I know, I know, it’s already full of duets but I think that one really fits them and it’s track six which would continue the theme. I can also see a dark blue colour for it which would mean turning Anti-Hero lighter so Midnight Rain could fit between that and Lavender Haze. In the end though, I decided 7 gifs were enough and also tbh I just don’t think I acre enough about Finchel to give them a gif and a song off Midnights. I have even more thoughts on colours and alternate clips but this is long as is, so, all for now. But as you can probably tell I’d gladly go on some more haha. Please do send thoughts if you made it all the way through!

#anon #projecting taylor onto glee #glee asks #ask and you shall receive haha #i don't think i have a tag for gif explanations so uhm #gif explanaton #there that will do #thank you for enabling this anon #Midnights #please read this it's 2am

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lost-in-the-80s · 4 years ago

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Oops

Pairing: Izzy Stradlin x (fem) reader

Words: 1,346k

Summary: You do Izzy a favor and now he wants to thank you properly. (smut + fluff)

Requested by: @pinkpatiencecreepers

A/N: I hope you like it, honey! Huge thanks to @vinylvintage for helping me with this plot <3 Do you guys want a part 2?

Warnings: Mature content and swearing. Those fingers aren’t there just to point at the camera....

Tag list: @roger-taylors-car @ladieswttda @teasid @metalheartofgold @slashscowboyboots @ginny-rose-sixx @rumoured-whispers @bigdaddylars @mudkicker add yourself to my tag list :)

Part 2

It was early Thursday morning, Izzy had just gotten to the studio, one hour ahead of the boys, just so he could finish some lyrics in peace. Turning on the lights, he entered the room, their instruments from the previous day were still everywhere, guitars on the floor and on the couch along with lots of empty bottles of booze.

Picking up an acoustic guitar, he entered the sound booth, opening some space on the equipment table among tons of papers with what could someday become lyrics. He sat down on the chair in front of it, ready to play his guitar when he realized he had forgotten his notebook with the lyrics at home.

Cursing under his breath, he contemplated his options, walking back home to get it, or calling Y/N, his girlfriend, and asking her to bring it to him. It was her free day at work, and she had a motorcycle, so he realized calling her was a much better choice.

“Hello?” Her voice answered the phone.

“Hey baby, I need you to do something for me.”

“Iz? Sure! What do you need?”

“I forgot my notebook, the one with the lyrics, it must be in the living room.”

There was silence for a few seconds.

“Yes, it is, I can see it.”

“Can you bring it to me?”

“Of course. I’ll be there in 10 minutes.”

“Ok, thank you, babe!”

“It’s no problem, love!”

Well, ten minutes would’ve been a great time, but he knew his girlfriend, and especially knew that she was always late. And as he already expected, she just showed up 30 minutes later.

She entered the studio wearing black denim shorts and a long-sleeved black shirt, her shorts were really short, making his eyes scan her like a predator. Even though her choice of clothes wasn’t intentional, he couldn’t help but stare at her legs, he loved them.

“Hey, baby!” She opened the booth door, his notebook in hand.

“Hey.” His voice was husky. “Come on in.” He motioned with his hand.

Closing the door behind her, she stopped beside him, leaning down and pecking his lips. “It’s this one, right?” She showed him the notebook.

“Yes, it’s this one. Thank you.” He got the notebook from her hands, before placing it on the table. Turning to the side with his chair, he opened his legs, making her stand in between them, his hands finding her hips and gripping at them.

“It’s no problem, Izzy.” She smiled, her hands caressing his face as he looked up at her.

“You know how much I love it when you wear shorts.” He smirked, his hands going up and down her legs. “Come here.” He touched his lap. “Let me thank you properly.”

His words made a certain wetness start to form on her core. Biting her bottom lip, she sat on his lap, one leg in each side of his body as his hands moved to her butt cheeks, squeezing them while he leaned down to kiss her.

Their kiss was full of lust and desire. His tongue invaded her mouth, exploring every single inch of it, while her hands found his hair, tugging and running through his locks, messing it completely.

“You’re always such a good girl to me.” He said near her ear, biting her earlobe gently, making her gasp.

Starting to kiss and nip at her neck, he slid one of his hands inside her shorts, smirking. “No panties?” His voice was husky as his other hand gripped tight on her right butt cheek.

“Laundry day.” She whispered, receiving a dry chuckle from him.

Returning his lips to her neck, he slid one finger in between her folds, feeling her wetness with it and smirking even more. He found her clit, starting to apply circular motions on it, slow and steady, making her close her eyes and a low moan to leave her lips.

That’s one of the things she loved about Izzy, he was never in a rush, no matter if they were late for an appointment or not, he always took his time when the subject was to please her.

He bit her neck as he entered her with a finger, slowly moving in and out of her.

“Izzy.” She whispered near his ear, making a shiver run down his body.

He growled under his breath and he inserted another finger inside of her, smiling with delight when a moan left her lips.

His free hand found her hair tugging at her strands as he increased his speed on her clit, he knew all her weaknesses, and he was willing to explore all of them. A louder moan left her mouth as her head fell backward with his gentle but firm tugging at her scalp.

“Fuck.” She said.

Her walls started to clench around his fingers and he knew that just a few more seconds and she’d fall apart, right in front of him. He removed his head from her neck, wanting to glimpse the spectacle that was about to come, but his attention was taken away from her when he heard that word.

“Oops.” Axl’s voice filled the booth as he opened the door, a smirk on his face while he chuckled at the scene in front of him.

Izzy couldn’t care less though, his mission was Y/N, and Y//N only, but he knew that having people around wasn’t one of her fetishes, so he removed his hands from her shorts and let go of her hair, watching as she got up quickly, rubbing the back of her neck as she looked at Axl.

“Hum… Hi Axl.” She smiled weirdly.

“Hello, Y/N...” His smirk got bigger. “Izzy.”

Rolling his eyes, Izzy got up, sucking at his fingers with so much thirstiness that Y/N clenched her legs together, feeling her core get even wetter, if that was possible.

“Will you stay during the recording?” Axl asked.

“I don’t know.”

“Stay, I want your opinion on a song,” Izzy said, touching her hand.

“Okay.” She smiled before taking a place on the leather couch in the booth.

One by one the boys arrived, starting to discuss lyrics and the melody for some of the songs, and the only thing Y/N could do was to watch Izzy, the shape of his hands, and the way they played his guitar, or the way they hold the cigarette that he took to his lips so many times.

She watched him as if she was in trance, like a moth in trance with the light, she felt like the only thing she could do was to stare, and the more she stared, the wetter she got.

Izzy watched her too, fewer times, since he was working, but at every chance he got he’d look at her, and the sight of her squeezing her legs against each other or changing position constantly in favor to get some relief, made him harder than he was when she entered the place wearing those shorts.

They had finished playing, were now just discussing some lyrics and Y/N seemed to be in the same condition as she was at the beginning of the morning, silently begging with her eyes for him to do something.

Taking a cigarette to his lips, he placed his guitar on the floor, before patting his lap. “Come here, princess.”

Getting up slowly, she walked over to him, sitting on his lap again. Her shoulder was lined with his chest as an arm of his circled her waist, bringing her closer to him. Adjusting her position, Y/N smirked when she felt his boner inside his pants, she made sure to rub herself over it a couple of times before she finally stopped moving.

None of the boys thought much of it though, except for Axl, who knew exactly what they were doing, and smirked widely from the other side of the room.

“I’ll take care of you later, I promise.” Izzy whispered in her ear, making her bite her lip with excitement, eager for so-called later.

#harley writes #Izzy Stradlin #izzy stradlin fanfic #izzy stradlin imagine #izzy stradlin fic #izzy stradlin x reader #izzy stradlin smut #guns n roses #guns n roses fanfic #guns n roses fic #guns n roses imagine #guns n roses x reader #guns n roses smut #classic rock #classic rock imagine

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mrsalwayswrite · 4 years ago

Text

To Call Forth Love- Chapter 4

So I planned for this chapter and the next to originally be one but as I started writing it, the words kept flowing and oops....now its really long. So I decided to split it. This means that I’m pretty much done with the next chapter so I’ll be able to get it out in a few days! Yay!

Also, Ivar is pretty manipulative in this chapter. Someone made a comment in the last chapter that I want to acknowledge. Going forward this is kind of a theme but I just want to put that warning statement- if this is triggering for you, please read with caution. There is nothing explicit or graphic but its still manipulation.

Words:4000

Warnings: swearing, manipulation

Tag List: @youbloodymadgenius

Series Masterlist

Sitting in the office at work, Kari sipped on her smoothie as she plugged in numbers for an inventory order. She had just finished teaching one of her morning classes and was now doing some paperwork for Lydia while on her "lunch break".

She jumped when her phone suddenly buzzed- a text alert. Surprised and curious as to who would be texting her at this time, she unlocked her phone to see the text from an unknown number.

Unknown: hey u busy 2nite?

Kari: who is this?

Unknown: u fav person

Kari: OMG! Ed Sheeran?!

She giggled quietly to herself, returning back to the laptop screen. Normally she ignored any calls or texts from unknown numbers, but it had been a good morning and she was feeling playful. When there was no return text, she shrugged the conversation off and returned to the order. Apparently, the unknown number did not get the reaction they were hoping for or realized they text the wrong person. Either way, she did not care.

A couple minutes later, her phone started to vibrate repeatedly. Looking down, she saw she was getting a call from the unknown number. She hesitated to answer, but by the third ring her curiosity got the better of her and she answered it.

"Hello?"

"FUCKING ED SHEERAN? REALLY?"

She sat there stunned. "Ivar?"

"Of course, it's me. Who the fuck were you expecting?" He asked, angrily.

"How did you get my number?"

He ignored her question, his voice suddenly sounding muffled. "Yeah, yeah, I'll be a second…. damn it. I know!"

"Who is that?"

"My brother.” He scoffed, muttering something unintelligible under his breath, before speaking to her again. “I have to head back into a meeting now."

"Oh, ok?"

"You didn't answer my question."

Her mind was still reeling from the fact that Ivar Lothbrok had her number and was calling her out of the blue. "What question?"

He huffed, exasperation evident in his tone. "Are you busy tonight?"

"Why?"

"I want to take you out."

"Ivar," she sighed, pressing a hand to her forehead, "I told you, I can't."

"Yeah and I don't believe you, so…."

"No. I'm sorry but the answer is still no."

"Fine. I have to go." He snapped then abruptly ended the call.

Slowly, she pulled the phone away from her ear and stared at it. What just happened? Before she forgot, she added his number to her contacts since she had the distinct feeling this would not be the last time he contacted her. Once done, she set her phone down and dropped her head into her hands.

It had been two days since he drove her home and she said they could be friends. In those two days, this was the first contact they had. She had hoped he grew bored with her since she was not playing his game, that she refused to go out with him. Maybe he finally decided she was not worth his time and moved on? Which was for the best. She could never fit into his world, there was no space for her there. Nor did she want to. She was happy, content with her life.

It was better for her to not allow Ivar into her life. That's what she repeated to herself as she tried to focus on the inventory order.

*****

"Just put the bags right there, thank you." Kari said, placing the grocery bags, one in each hand, onto the tiled floor. The kitchen in her townhouse was small, two people could barely move around in it without bumping into one another. Thankfully, she did not spend much time in the kitchen. Cooking had never been her forte.

"Do you need anything else? I don't mind staying to help." The dirty-blond haired man asked, setting the two bags he carried down onto the floor. He started to shuffle forward but seemed to think better of it and leaned against the half-wall separating the kitchen from the short hallway.

"Erik, it's fine. If anything, I owe you. You never let me pay for gas money."

He shrugged, and tucked his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. "It's not a big deal. I needed to shop too."

"Still, it's not fair to you." She turned around from placing the milk in the fridge to look at him.

"If I think of something you can do to repay me, I'll let you know. Deal?"

"Perfect."

"Do you still want a ride to work tomorrow?"

She shut the door and jokingly waved a hand at him. "See! You're too nice."

"I'd be ‘too nice’ if I also showed up with coffee for you."

She laughed, moving some frozen fruit into the freezer. "You're too perfect to not have a girlfriend."

He rubbed the back of his neck, a flush growing on his cheeks and drawing out a boyish smile. "I don't know if I'd say that. I'll let you get to it. I'll meet you outside at nine?"

"Thank you, Erik."

"Of course." He popped his head around the wall to look into the living room. "See you, Alana!"

"Bye, Erik!" The response came from the living room.

Kari continued to put her groceries away as she heard the front door click shut behind him. Somehow, she needed to figure out a way to pay him back.

Erik lived in the townhouse next door alone. When he learned that Kari did not own a car, he offered to give her rides whenever it worked out for both of their schedules. At first, she had been hesitant, still not having lived in the townhouse for long but eventually gave in because he always acted like such a gentleman. Every time he saw her, he made sure to greet her and ask about her day. He always held the door open for her and anybody else close by. A negative word never passed his lips, rather choosing to focus on the positive in life. A routine soon started to form and every two weeks they would meet up outside of their townhouses and go grocery shopping together. When she did not have to work early, he would occasionally give her rides to work since the bank he worked at was only a couple blocks away. That was the extent of their interactions though. She wondered about inviting him over for dinner as to thank him but she always chickened out in asking him. Perhaps that was what she needed to do after all.

Once all her groceries were put away, she headed into the living room, seeing her roommate and friend sitting on the couch with the TV on to the Great British Bake-off but looking down at her phone.

The brunette asked, dropping onto the second couch. "How was work?"

"Good. You?" Alana looked up, her make-up flawless like usual on her delicate features.

"Nothing too exciting."

"You know, if you'd waited two hours I could have taken you to the store."

Kari nodded, fiddling with her diamond stud earring. "I know, but you're so busy with work and school. I know you like relaxing when you come home and Erik said he was free today."

"Did he now?" Alana asked with a smug look.

Kari tossed a throw pillow at her. "Don't start this again."

The blonde caught the pillow, still grinning like the Cheshire cat. "You know he likes you. He's just too shy to ask you out."

"He's a friend, it's been like seven months, I think if he was going to ask me out, he would have done it by now."

"He. Is. Shy." Alana enunciated, as if talking to a child. She rolled her blue eyes, leaning back against the couch. "Shit, he only started to actually talk to me this summer."

"Cause you are intimidating."

Alana threw the pillow back at Kari. "Bitch, it's cause I radiate sexiness and he can't handle it."

"That is most definitely it."

"Well the guy I hooked up with last weekend said I radiated sexiness."

Kari wrinkled her nose, looking over at her roommate. "I don't want to hear that. It's bad enough when you bring them here."

"You know, it wouldn't be the worst thing for you to actually go out with Erik. He's…. sweet." She quietly stated, eyes back on the TV.

"Yeah."

"I'm fairly sure he'd treat you better than that fucker of ex."

Kari picked invisible lint off her black leggings, apprehensive about where the topic was going. Her love life, and lack of it, was something Alana liked to remind her of frequently as of late. "Honestly, I'm even sure anymore he should count as an ex."

"Well you were supposed to be exclusive, right? And then you find out he's been fucking other girls the whole time. That counts as a shitty ex."

She winced at the reminder of her one attempt at dating. "I don't…. I don't think I'm ready."

The blonde pointed a finger at her roommate without turning her eyes away from the TV. "Well don't wait around forever, you'll miss out."

"Says the woman who hooks up with a different guy almost every other weekend."

"And I'm not missing out!"

Kari laughed. Feeling her phone vibrate, she pulled it out of her pocket and checked it to see a new text from Ivar.

Ivar: hell no, if we r gng 2 see the Northern Lights thn we're gng 2 Iceland or Norway.

She smiled at the text, quickly typing in a reply.

Kari: fine, we'll add that to the list. Can I please put South Africa back on the list?

She fiddled with her diamond stud earrings, looking back at their conversation throughout the day. Just looking at all the texts, she bit her lip to try and contain the smile.

Ivar had texted her in the late morning, asking her out again. To which she just texted back a one-word answer- "no". Apparently undeterred, he ignored her 'no', saying how he wanted to take her to this popular restaurant. Somehow the conversation spiraled into creating overly outrageous "dates" he would take her on, each one more fantastic than the last, with her encouraging and creating her own ideas. Their texting had lasted all day, and she found herself actually looking forward to his responses. Something she never would have expected, especially after how rudely he hung up on her the prior day.

So far her favorite "date" involved him renting out the entire Roman Colosseum in Rome and having a candlelight dinner in the middle of the arena. The most amusing one was when she suggested they go skydiving. He shut down that idea saying they would have to be strapped to instructors and the only man she should ever be strapped to was him.

Her phone vibrated in her hand, alerting her to his response.

Ivar: u r not swimming w/ sharks

She giggled, trying to imagine his facial expression. She actually had no desire to do half of the stuff she suggested but it was funny to get a rise out of him.

Kari: African safari?

"What are you giggling at?" Alana questioned, giving her the side-eye.

The smile dropped from her face. "Nothing."

"That doesn't sound like nothing."

"Just a funny meme." She deflected, getting to her feet. There was no way she could tell Alana she had been texting Ivar all day. "I'm going to shower."

As she headed upstairs to her room, her phone vibrated again.

Ivar: do u jus luv danger?

Kari: I'm talking to you, aren't I?

She headed to her bathroom, turning the shower on and checking the temperature. In a spur of the moment decision, she tossed in a eucalyptus shower bomb.

Just before she jumped in, she looked at her phone one last time to find his response.

Ivar: touche, kitten, touche 😘

*****

The soothing soundtrack of nature played over the speakers in the yoga studio room. A few women were already in the studio with their yoga mats out, either stretching or quietly conversing as they waited. Depending on the day, the ten am morning class could be busy but typically it averaged about fifteen to twenty women.

Kari bent over, touching her palms to the floor. Even though she would not be continuously doing the routine along with those in her class, she still liked to be limber and have her muscles warmed up. This was a beginner class, where she spent a good portion of the time either correcting people's forms or showing how to do a certain pose. A few of her coworkers complained about teaching beginner classes since when the participants walked through the door, you never really knew what level they were at.

Checking the clock hanging over the door, she saw she had five minutes before her class started. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, enjoying the pull of her muscles. The door to the studio room opened but Kari continued to stretch, shifting to a downward facing dog pose, holding it. She could hear some people moving around but she focused on her breathing.

"Mmm, I could get used to seeing this."

The familiar voice behind her, caused Kari to try and whip around in startled surprise, only to end up crashing onto her ass.

Above her stood Ivar with a devilish smile. "Hello, kitten." He softly said with smolder that instantly made her flush and a tendril of warmth curl in her belly. Standing there in his jeans and red shirt with his hair pulled back in a man bun, it was unfair how striking he looked. Even the braces over his legs did nothing to deter from his attractiveness.

She rose quickly to her feet, wiping her hands over her leggings and peeking at the others in the room. Most were curiously watching their interaction but remained where they were.

"What are you doing here?" She hissed, turning her gaze back up to meet his. "How did you find me?"

He rolled his eyes. "You were wearing a Whole Wellness Yoga Studio shirt when I drove you home last week. Plus, hearing from Gyda that you work here…. You're not that hard to find."

That made sense, even if she disliked the logic. "Ok, fine. Why are you here though?"

"I want to take you out tonight."

"Oh gods." She could not believe what she was hearing. The prior day they had spent most of the day texting and sure it was fun, but her answer had not changed. When he had not text her this morning, she assumed that was the last she had heard from him. Apparently, he decided to ask her out in person instead of over the phone like the past two times. "Ivar… No."

"Why? You keep saying you can't but never why."

"It's just…. look, I don't want to date."

He took a step closer, face inches above hers. His voice dropped low, an underlying current of anger in his tone. Those piercing blue eyes challenged her. "You say that but I don't think that's the real reason. So, until you tell me the truth, your 'no' means fucking nothing. Friends tell each other things, right?"

"You know, I don't think we should be friends anymore."

He chuckled, still standing too close for a normal conversation. "Too late. I like you."

"I'm still not going out with you." She placed her hands on her hips, trying to appear confident, hoping desperately he did not hear the wavering in her voice. 'This was for the best, it was best for both of them' she repeated in her mind.

"Fine. I'll wait for you to change your mind." He winked and stepped back. To her horror, she watched as he walked over to the side of the room where she kept her water bottle and light jacket. He grabbed a nearby chair and dragged it over before dropping down with his legs in a manspread, that stupid smirk still on his face.

She stomped over to him, whisper-shouting at him. "What are you doing?"

"I'm waiting."

"What?"

"I'm not leaving until you agree to go on a date with me."

"You can't...no…. Ivar." She whined.

"I walked all the way here to see you, even though my legs are quite painful today…. you wouldn't kick a cripple out when they just need to rest, would you?" He asked, eyes widened in mock innocence. One of his hands rubbed at his knee in exaggerated fashion as if to prove the discomfort he was in.

She groaned. "I hate you."

"No, you don't." He gloated, then nodded towards the clock. "It's ten o'clock, it's time to start your class, I believe."

Without another word, she moved to the front of the room. She refused to play this game. Her answer was 'no' and no matter what he said or did, her answer would not change. The whole time she could feel his rakish gaze on her, reminding her how tight her leggings and purple tank top were. She tried to focus on her class, smiling at the women she recognized and the ones that she assumed was new. "Let's begin. Everyone start in mountain pose. Take deep breaths, let's center ourselves."

"Kari!"

She looked over at the older woman, Ingrid, who called out. The woman was easily one of Kari's favorites, doting upon those who worked at the yoga studio, and becoming the unofficial grandmother of them. Ingrid had been coming to the yoga studio for years but was forced to only take beginner level classes after a bad fall the prior year. She loudly complained about her doctor being an idiot and how she felt fine, but Lydia refused to let her attend any other class than beginner classes until otherwise said by her doctor.

"Yes?"

Ingrid's hazel eyes twinkled with mischief from the front row where she stood. "You planning on introducing that handsome young man you've got over there?"

"No, we are going to ignore his presence. He's going to be leaving soon." Kari flatly stated with a polite smile.

"Hi! I'm Ivar!" He announced with a charming smile, his bright blue eyes alluring under the dim lights. Giving a little wave with his fingers, he continued, "I hope my presence doesn't bother all you lovely women, I just came to see my girlfriend and ask her on a date tonight."

A chorus of "awwwws" filled the room.

Kari wanted nothing more than to bang her head against a wall. Or preferably, Ivar's head. She could not believe the audacity of him.

"Where are you taking her?" One of the newer women asked in a flirty tone, pulling her shoulders back to emphasize her ample chest.

Ivar barely glanced at her, keeping his focus on Kari. "It's a surprise. I wanted to do something special."

"Young man, if I were a few years younger, I would fight Kari here so you could take me on a date." Ingrid said with a laugh.

"I would be honored to take a lovely woman like you on a date." He sent a playful wink to Ingrid.

"Alright, let's get back to yoga." Kari tried to redirect the attention. Annoyed and upset did not even begin to describe how she felt.

"Well it was lovely to meet you, young man. Kari should have told us her boyfriend was so handsome. We might have convinced her to bring you in sooner for some eye candy." Ingrid teased.

"He's not my boyfriend." Kari retorted, shooting a glare at the smug raven-haired man.

"And that is why I'm trying to take her on a date." He placed a hand dramatically over his heart, eyes staring at her beseechingly. "Just for her to give me a chance."

"Get her some tulips. Those are her favorite flowers." Karina called out from the back of the room.

"Can't go wrong with chocolate!"

"Oh! Read her a sonnet and dance under the stars together!"

"This is so romantic…. like something out of a movie." Someone loudly whispered, making a few others laugh.

Kari dropped her chin to her chest. Tears welled in her eyes. She knew those in the class meant well, that they were really just trying to help. But they were helping the wrong person. Why would Ivar not leave her alone? She told him 'no' multiple times, that should have been enough. Her tolerance for his behavior was waning rapidly and honesty she was not sure if she would fight back…. or surrender.

The chair scratched faintly on the floor followed by his footsteps landing audibly as he crossed the room to reach her. She refused to lift her head, her eyes squeezed shut. Not just to pretend she could not feel him standing so close to her, but to try and hide the single tear that rolled down her cheek.

"Kari." He whispered, the sound a caress of her name.

Still she did not move.

Gently, he tipped her chin up, forcing her to look at him. His thumb wiped away the evidence of her tear. It was those captivating eyes, the ones that could both scorch everything in view but also send flames of desire dancing across her skin, that met hers. To her surprise, there was a softness in his gaze, a vulnerability, that was reminiscent of the few times they were alone. As if with just her, for a brief moment, he let his guard down and she could glimpse the real Ivar.

"Go out with me." He murmured faintly, stroking her cheek with his thumb. Standing in front of her, his broad back to the class gave them a semblance of privacy. "Please."

"Why can't you let this go?" She begged quietly, staring up at him.

"I told you, I'm persistent." He smiled, almost shyly.

In his words, it felt like there was such a depth to them she was unaware of. That he was confessing something to her in which she did not have the key to fully understand.

She sighed softly, closing her eyes for a moment before looking at him again. "Fine. I'll go…. But it's only as friends, ok? This isn't…. Romantic. Just…. Just friends."

"Sure, just friends." He leaned forward and pressed a quick, chaste kiss to her cheek. "I'll pick you up at seven."

She nodded, feeling torn apart inside.

After a lingering look that breathed a flame into her belly, he spun on his heel to face the women. "She said yes!"

A few cheers and clapping reverberated in the small yoga studio room.

"I graciously thank you all for your sound advice and encouragement with helping me to woo the beautiful Kari. Wish me luck as I plan to thoroughly spoil her tonight." Ivar dramatically bowed, shooting a quick wink at Kari as she watched him.

She desperately tried to fight the small smile off her lips. No one could say that Ivar was not charming or charismatic when it suited him.

As he finally made his way to the door, he turned around just before pushing it open. "Wear something nice." He said, pointing a finger at Kari and then walked out like a dream where one cannot decide if it was a nightmare or not.

The brunette ran a hand down her face before shoving aside her emotions and plastering a customer smile on. "I'm so sorry about all of this. Let's get back to it. I promise it won't happen again, ladies."

"Kari, dear, you have fun with that boy tonight." Ingrid spoke up, eyes darting to the now closed door and back to the yoga instructor. "And if you don't want him, let me know. I'd still jump on him in a heartbeat. That boy has the prettiest eyes, I swear."

A few sounds of agreement echoed in the room.

Kari could not stop her smile from turning genuine at Ingrid. No matter the situation, the feisty, older woman always knew how to make her laugh. "I promise I'll let you know. Now, back to mountain pose please."

Silently, she hoped tonight was not a mistake.

#vikings #vikings fandom #vikings fanfic #vikings fanfiction #vikings imagine #modern ivar #ivar x ofc #ivars heathen army #ivar romance #ivar the boneless #modern!ivar #modern!ivar x oc #to call forth love #mzwrites

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galaxyofmyown · 5 years ago

Note

Hi!! I'm not sure if you'll take it (and that's 100% okay!!) but as a request can you write hotch x younger, shy reader? I'm just all about that age gap with him (yes, that's my daddy issues speaking up). Have a nice day!! ❤

hi! this was so fun to write. i was aiming for like, idk, 500 words? and then oops! i wrote almost 2000. i accidentally made it specifically for a female reader, so let me know if that doesn’t work for you and i can tweak it. also, sorry if the end feels rushed, but i’m about to fall asleep and i wanted to wrap this one up so i could write the other requests tomorrow. let me know what you think! xx

aaron hotchner x reader - surprise me

“Hey, (Y/N). Drinks? Everyone’s going.” You hear Derek ask. You smile before spinning around in your desk chair.

“God, yes. I was hoping you’d ask, I really need to blow off some steam.” You reply, getting up and grabbing your bag, having already packed up for the night. The team had just gotten back from Middle-of-Nowhere, Kansas, and to say the case was intellectually challenging was an understatement. It felt a lot like piecing together a never-ending puzzle, but you had saved the lives of countless innocent people. There was no better feeling.

Drinking is a close second, however, which is why you were impatiently pacing near the elevator as the rest of your team gathered their things. As soon as everyone arrived, you filed into the elevator.

“You look excited, (Y/N).” Emily said with a smile, knocking her shoulder into yours. You laugh.

“Why wouldn’t I be? Any excuse to spend more time with my favorite group of people!” You say, your voice taking on a teasing tone as you poke a pink-polished finger into Reid’s side. Reid yelps and jumps away, blushing slightly. The rest of the team laughs, Morgan reaching to ruffle his hair. You smile at the sight. They were truly a second family to you. The elevator doors were nearly closed when a large hand reached in and caused the doors to jerk and reopen.

And there he was.

Your boss, Aaron Hotchner. You tensed despite yourself as he slid in right next to you. Rossi clapped him on the shoulder.

“Nice of you to join us.” He said. Hotch nodded, professional as ever. Everyone looked as surprised as you felt.

“You’re coming out with us, sir? You never come.” Garcia said, not unkindly. You all understood his commitment to his son, so you couldn’t really blame him for always being too busy for drinks. Unlike everyone else, your surprise was less pleasant and more panicked. Even though you’d been on the team for well over a year, you still found it extremely difficult to talk to Hotch outside of a case.

It might have something to do with you being head over heels for the older man.

“Jack is with his aunt for the weekend, so JJ convinced me to tag along. I hope that’s alright with everyone.” He said, looking directly at you. You nod and force a tight smile, missing the way your discomfort makes his brows furrow.

There goes your plan to let loose. You can’t help but monitor every word, every movement you make when you’re around Hotch. You found him attractive the moment you met him, the epitome of tall, dark, and handsome. It wasn’t until a few weeks later that you realized you actually had feelings for the man. You loved how caring and loyal he was, and you appreciated every smile and laugh he allowed himself. He was also a natural leader, solid in a way no other man in your life had been. You understood, however, that Hotch would never settle for someone as young and inexperienced as you. Aside from the odd celebrity crush, you had never felt so attracted to an older man. It left you floundered, constantly at a loss for words. He probably thought you were an immature girl who couldn’t control her feelings at 28.

You rode with Emily to the bar, who couldn’t stop laughing at your nerves. She was your best friend, so she knew all about your unfortunate crush. Hopefully she was the only one.

“He’s really a nice guy, (Y/N). Not intimidating at all. Well, not when you actually talk to him. You should try it sometime.” She said, pulling the bar door open for you. You rolled your eyes.

“I do talk to him. That’s the problem. The more I’m around him the more likely it is that I die of a broken heart. Do you want me to die, Prentiss? Is that what you want?” You said. Emily barks out a laugh at your theatrics. Your conversation is cut short as you approach the large round booth your team is occupying for the night. Emily sneaks over to sit next to Rossi, leaving only the seat next to Hotch. She smiles with false sweetness and you slide in across from her, and you kick her lightly under the table. You stay as close to the edge of the seat as you can manage, trying your hardest not to impinge on Hotch’s personal space.

You’re about to ask if anyone wants a drink when Hotch slides your favorite drink, a Moscow Mule, over to you.

“It’s your favorite, right?” Hotch asks, his voice soft over the noise of the bar. You falter. How did he know that? You probably haven’t ordered a drink in front of him in months.

“Um, uh, yeah. Thank you.” You say. He nods curtly. You both turn away from each other, and you sip at your drink, hoping it’ll take the edge off soon enough.

Despite the pleasant conversation you have with your team, you can’t shake your nerves. Three drinks deep and still feeling like you’ve had the breath knocked out of you every time you see Hotch laugh.

“So, Hotch. Anyone special in your life?” Garcia asks boldly, trying to shake the attention off her and her current love life.

Nope. Not happening. You get up from the table abruptly, shaking the table slightly as you do so. Great, now everyone is looking at you.

“Um. Anybody want another drink?” You ask. JJ requests another vodka soda and Hotch politely asks for a beer. You never drink beer, but you’re too nervous to ask which kind. You rush off to the bar, where a bartender about your age is wiping down the counter.

“Hi! Can I get a vodka soda, a glass of water, and a beer, please?” You ask, feeling your nerves dissolve. The bartender looks up, his blonde hair falling over his eyes.

“What kind of beer?” He asks. You shrug, defeated.

“Honestly, just surprise me.” You say. He smiles, clearly amused, and turns to get your drinks. You don’t even notice someone approaching until you hear a familiar voice clear his throat.

“(Y/N).” He says. You turn, trying not to shy away as Hotch towers over you.

“Yes?” You say, willing your voice to not sound squeaky.

“Can we talk?” He asks, pulling at his tie.

Fuck.

“Sure. Let me just…” You trail off, motioning at the bartender. Hotch nods in understanding. Just as he does, the bartender slides the drinks over to you. Hotch grabs JJ’s drink and walks it over to her. Emily sends you a suggestive look from across the room. You flip her off and turn to the bartender.

“Please add these to Emily Prentiss’ tab. That’s P-R-E-N-T-I-S-S.” You say, and the bartender laughs.

“No problem, um-” He says. You smile.

“(Y/N).” You say, filling in his blank.

“Well, nice to meet you, (Y/N).” He says before being flagged down by another customer.

You turn around with your water and Hotch’s beer, only to bump right into the older man.

“Jesus fuck!” You exclaim as ice water stings your hand. Hotch laughs, a deep rumbling sound that completely entrances you.

“Sorry.” He says, freeing up one of your hands by taking his beer.

“I hope you like that kind. I’m not much of a beer drinker.” You say, trying for a smooth recovery. Hotch nods appreciatively.

“This is perfect,” He says, and you unclench slightly, “could we talk outside? It’s a bit loud in here.”

You nod, and he guides you out of the bar with his hand on your elbow. The crisp evening air takes some over the edge off. Hotch leans against the brick wall and you do the same. You’re only illuminated by the purple neon “open” sign hanging over you.

“I wanted to apologize.” Hotch blurts out, taking you by surprise. You tilt your head to the side, asking a silent question. Hotch almost dies on the spot.

“I- I’ve acted inappropriately towards you, and for that I apologize. I value your expertise and think you’re an invaluable member of this team. I never intended to make you uncomfortable.” He says in a rush, throwing you completely off guard. It takes you a moment to remember how to talk, but when you do all that comes out is-

“What are you talking about?”

Hotch runs a hand through his hair and smiles, but it looks painful.

“Please, (Y/N), don’t make me say it.”

“Say what?” You ask, completely bewildered.

“That I have feelings for you.”

And then you wake up.

Well, this is the part where you should wake up, but you’re still here, outside with Hotch. Hotch. Aaron Hotchner. Who likes you.

“What?” You said, not trusting yourself to say anything else. Hotch smiles again, resigned.

“Please. You must’ve noticed. I haven’t been exactly inconspicuous. And again, I’m sorry. It must make you very uncomfortable for someone more advanced than you in both age and position to be so blatant in their feelings for you.”

“What is happening?” You whisper, mostly to yourself. “You- you like me?” You ask as if he hasn’t made it obvious enough. Hotch actually has the audacity to look ashamed as he nods. After you’ve had a moment to process, you can’t help the world-stopping, blinding smile that graces your face. You tentatively reach for his hand. Hotch looks up at you in disbelief as you entwine your fingers with him.

“(Y/N)?” He asks carefully, not fully trusting the scene unfolding before him.

“I had no idea,” You say, feeling elated, “I always thought I was the one being obvious about my feelings.”

Hotch jerks his hand away, and your face falls.

“But- you shouldn’t have any feelings. Not for me.” He says, his face turning stony before your eyes.

“Why not?”

“Because, (Y/N)! I’m too old for you. I can’t give you what I want. You deserve to be with someone your age, someone who can give you all of his time.” He says, taking a step away from you. You take another step towards him.

“Hey, no. Is your name Aaron Hotchner?” You ask, pulling him towards you.

“What? Yes.” He says, clearly confused. You slowly and gently take his face in your hands, bringing his forehead down to yours.

“Then you are what I want, Aaron.” You whisper, the name tasting sweet in your mouth. Hotch practically melts, pulling you into a hug by your waist. You wrap your arms around his neck and revel in the warmth of his body and fast beat of his heart.

“(Y/N), my darling girl,” He says softly, pulling back slightly. “Can I kiss you?” He asks. You nod eagerly, and he pulls you to him. He kisses the way he loves, carefully yet passionately. When you pull away you feel like a new woman, and you wrap your arms around him once again.

“You are amazing.” He says, his words warming you even more than his touch. You kiss him again.

“Let’s go home, Aaron.” You say. And you do.

#aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner imagine #hotch imagine #hotch x reader #criminal minds #criminal minds imagine #ssa hotchner

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xxisxxisxxis · 4 years ago

Text

Gateway Drug | Part Eighty-Three [Pt. 1]

Part Eighty-Three [Pt. 2]

A/N: There's 2 parts to this chapter because the post was way long. Part Eighty-Four will be posted tomorrow night. I love yall and hope you enjoy, goodnight!!

Words: 5.7k

Warnings: Explicit language, drug abuse, violence, verbal abuse, domestic abuse, explicit sexual situations

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"The ambulance is on the way." I hear someone say over the noise of the running water and the blood throbbing in my ears from my mind racing.

My heart feels like it's about to burst, my lungs feel flat, like they don't have the muscle to expand and let me catch my breath.

Duff's t-shirt that I'm wearing is soaked with freezing cold water, Nikki's grayish-yellow skin now blue…

We've been trying to get him to wake up.

Slash is passed out, being knocked out by his girlfriend, Sally, once he realized what was happening and had a drunk meltdown.

Me, Sally, Duff and Steven get Nikki from the cold shower and get him back in the living room floor, tearing at his shirt and the buttons fly off.

"Holy shit." Steven says just under his breath as I go to start cpr but I'm stopping when my hands hit something like ice.

I quickly see what it is and I nearly fall back.

It's my crucifix that I thought I had lost when I left it in Duff's hotel room a couple months ago…

TWELVE HOURS AGO

"Nikki's getting home later than the rest of the guys." Karen informs me as I finish wiping down the kitchen counter.

"Why?" I ask and she sighs.

"He told me he missed the flight."

"Of course he did." I mumble and she sighs.

"Well, after that stunt he pulled, I'm surprised he's even getting to come home." She states and I furrow my brows.

"What stunt?"

"Doc didn't tell you?"

"No?"

"...Nikki and the guys were on a bullet train and something riled Nikki up and he threw a bottle of Jack at a window and it busted and got all over the passengers, then when they got stopped and the cops got ahold of him, Tommy punched one of them so they'd take him, too." She explains.

Am I surprised, no. Shocked, no. Disappointed, no. Annoyed? Yes.

"They are so freaking embarrassing." I sneer to myself.

"Oh, the worst part is what he told the police chief, in Doc's words, 'if my balls were on your chin, where would my dick be?'"

I widen my eyes, blinking slowly.

"He said the man couldn't understand exactly what he said so the translator told him Nikki said he was very sorry and they got off." She adds.

"Of course they did."

She just looks at me for a moment before letting out a soft breath.

"Vivian, do you think...even the slightest chance you two can--"

"--If there was a chance, I would've gone to Japan with them." I tell her.

She's quiet.

"I need to feed the dog." I say to her, dismissively, and as if on cue, Whisky is darting in here. "Hey, baby!" I pipe, excitedly, still feeling Karen's gaze on me before she steps out of the kitchen. "Mommy's trying not to kill Daddy." I tell him, pouring his food in his bowl. "She's really trying."

A couple hours later, I'm putting makeup on to go meet Duff when the phone starts ringing.

"Hello?" I answer it in the bedroom, sitting on the bed.

"Hey, beautiful, it's Robbin." I hear from the other side and I roll my eyes, chuckling.

"Hey, beautiful, what's up?" I reply in the same tone.

"Nothin'." He replies. "I was wondering if your daddy was home, yet?" He asks in reference to Nikki and I scoff.

"My father is at home with my mother, probably praying or reading the Bible or secretly listening to The Cult records in the garage." I reply.

"You know who I'm talking about, c'mon." He laughs.

"No, Robbin, your boyfriend isn't home yet." I tell him.

"Do you know when he will be?"

"Not too long from now, probably."

"Well, when he gets in, tell him to gimme a call."

"I might not be here but I'll leave a note."

"Where you going?" He asks.

"Out."

"With who?"

"Robbin."

"Why don't you ever come see me anymore? I haven't hung out with you in months."

"Because I don't party and that's all you like to do at night."

"Well, bring your ass with Sixx when he comes tonight."

"Robbin--"

"--Please, for me?"

"I'll think about it, alright?"

"Okay, just don't forget to get him to call me." He reminds me and I nod.

"I will."

"See you later...maybe."

"Later."

We hang up and I groan and fall back on the bed, looking at myself in the mirrored ceiling, before calling Duff to postpone our plans by a couple hours so I can go hangout with Nikki and Robbin.

Once I'm dressed, I fall back on the bed, waiting for Nikki to get in…

I turn over on my stomach and reach for the little radio clock on his side of the bed, my finger pulling the switch on.

Dopey Christmas music filters through the room and I turn it back off, sighing.

Whisky jumps up on the bed with me and I sit up so he doesn't lick my makeup off, giggling at his happy-go-lucky demeanor, but something's off in his eyes.

"He'll be back tonight, baby." I promise, scratching at his chin. "I miss him, too, you know? I know that's hard to believe but I do." I admit to him and he blinks at me. "And if you tell anybody, I won't give you table scraps anymore." I add, the corners of my mouth tugging.

I kiss his head, leaving a smudge of lipstick and I wince, forgetting I even had the stuff on.

"Oops." I go to the bathroom and get a wet washcloth, srubbing it off his fur as best as a I can.

That's when I hear the door open and slam, and I exhale, standing up, tossing the cloth aside and peeking my head out of the bedroom door to see if it's Karen or Nikki.

"Hey," I say to him and he looks at me.

He looks like absolute hell.

"You can stop looking at me like that." He mumbles and I try to speak but can't find the words.

"Sorry." I finally get it out and he goes to the bathroom and shuts the door.

I hear the shower start and I thank God because he smells horrendous.

I light a few scented candles while he's in there, trying to clear out the smell.

Then I try to search his suitcase for drugs, to no avail.

"I threw them out before I got to the airport." He says and I freeze up, sighing when he reaches past me and grabs the suitcase, tugging it to the floor before grabbing at my waist, making me turn around to face him.

I just try to keep my expression neutral, not knowing if he's in a mood or not.

"You smell better." I tell him to avoid an awkward silence as we're uncomfortably close.

"Yeah, so do you." He replies and I roll my eyes, about to move out of his grasp. "Wait, wait, no, no, c'mere." He grabs at me tighter, holding me still, chuckling boyishly and I give a sharp breath.

"You're high," I state, trying to nudge him away from me to give me some space.

"Hey, I'm being nice." His expression shifts, eyes cutting at me, mouth snarling.

"Nikki--"

"--No, when I'm pissed you get bitchy and when I'm in a good mood you get bitchy. You're just a fucking bitch. Always have been. Always will be." He snatches himself away, kicking the suitcase out of his way.

"I'd rather be a bitch than a junkie." I reply as he goes to the bathroom and he's turning around in milliseconds.

"Fuck you!" He shouts, grabbing my jaw, forcing my back down to the mattress, "fuck you, you condescending, manipulative, evil little witch!" He barks in my face and I keep myself as calm as I can, not wanting to make it worse.

I shouldn't have even called him a junkie to begin with.

I knew how he'd react.

"Don't you ever call me that again, Vivian, do you fucking understand me?! I'm tired of it! I'm tired of your shit and your endless whining when I started shooting up because of you in the first fucking place and I keep shooting up just to escape from the reality that I'm fucking married to a twisted, sick, sneaky cunt like you!"

My eyes water, a lump in my throat…

"Then divorce me." I let out weakly, my voice cracking. "If I'm so awful then just leave me, Nikki."

He looks at me, tears in his own eyes, before he gets off of me and goes to the bathroom to finish getting ready.

NIKKI

I thought couldn't do that. Even when I was miserable with her, I was in love with her. That's contradictory to how I acted and treated her but it wasn't necessarily an endless doting, constant lovey-dovey, in love, thing. It was a poisonous, constant merry-go-round and anytime I would try to get off she'd pull me on again without even realizing it. She'd wear a hot dress, or laugh, or smile, or do something for me, or just say 'Nikki', and fuck, I'd be on her again. The Duff thing wasn't even on my mind that night. I got home, saw she was there, went inside and saw her and it took everything in me not to fall to my fucking knees...only for her to call me a junkie. I shouldn't have grabbed her like that, but at that point I was tired of the going around and around, spinning, dizzy, exhausted from puking...she wouldn't leave me. So I was trying to scare her off.

I realized after my overdose that there was no scaring her off. She was as sick as I was, she needed help like I did, and until we got it we would still be on the ride. That's when I filed for divorce. I thought of it as my final, "I love you," because I really did it for her, knowing she wouldn't file after I OD'd. We were torturing ourselves at that point. We both needed to just get away from one another. And we did.

"You coming or not, Vivian, c'mon!" I call into the house when the car gets here, rolling my eyes as she takes her sweet, precious time, deliberately, staring me in the eye as she slowly steps to the door, her brow raised, red lips keeping restraint from curling at the sight of me.

When she walks past, I'm tempted to rear back and hit her ass as hard as my hand can muster, just to see her look at me with her unamused, pissy little look she gives me when I'm being an asshole.

We get in the back of the limo and she sits as far away from me as possible.

It's silent on the way to town, the light flittering, through the windows in the back cast light over her face every now and then...we'd be in the floor tearing at clothes by now if this was three years ago.

Fuck.

How the hell did we go from not getting enough of each other to fucking despising each other?

Again, like I've been doing all year, I remind myself it's because I fucked up with Vanity.

I hope she doesn't tell Vivian I called her in Japan...It's like I really miss her or anything, I was just lonely and Vivian wasn't taking my calls.

She was under Duff, the demon in my ear laughs out and I look at Vivian again, seeing her quickly look away from me as if she'd get caught for staring.

I wonder what she's thinking about right now...I wonder if she really has been with Duff this whole I haven't been home.

Not that I have room to bitch, I spent my whole time in Japan with my head in drugs--which might as well be a fucking mistress.

I give her one last glance before clearing my throat and leaning my head back to rest my eyes for a moment.

Soon, we stop, and the door flings open, Robbin, Slash, some chick, and Steven all pile in, Vivian scooting over so there's more room for everyone to sit.

I go to the other window, letting Slash and the girl I'm assuming is with him get beside me.

Vivian's between Robbin and Steven, and it's evident they've been having some fun before meeting us.

"Sixx!" Robbin lets out, kicking the seat I'm in.

"King!" I reply, kicking his seat, and he chuckles.

"How was Japan?" He asks, rubbing his nose.

"I barely remember." I admit with a laugh and he joins me, nodding.

"Nikki, this is Sally." Slash tells me next and I lean over him to see her.

She's pretty hot.

"Nice to meet you." She tells me.

She's Scottish...interesting.

I hear Vivian giggle and I peek out the corner of my eye and see Robbin whispering something in her ear, and she elbows him, jokingly.

"You are, just saying." He says to her and she rolls her eyes. "Just get more and more beautiful the longer I go without seeing you." He adds.

"Shut up." She nudges him.

"You are." He chuckles.

"Sleepy is what I am." She states as Steven tells me something, and I try to hear him, but I'm too focused on what Robbin's going on about.

"Here," he reaches in his pocket and pulls out a baggie of coke, grabbing his keys and getting some on the tip of it, holding it up to her nose.

She wrinkles her nose and shoos him away.

"No, no, no." She shakes her head.

"C'mon."

"No." She keeps her voice light but stern and he lowers it and looks at her with a smirk on his lips.

Next thing I know, she's laughing out, "Robbin, stop," while King's dumping the dab of coke on the smooth skin of her tit that's pushed up slightly in her strapless dress.

She squeals and laughs as he snorts it off, I guess because the scratch of his five o'clock shadow tickles or she just gets off on making me mad, then he starts quickly trailing little kisses up her cheek to her ear and she tries to put her ear to her shoulder, laughing more when his other hand tickles at her stomach…he's nearly got her laid out on the seat.

My foot makes contact with his stomach and I'm nearly barking when I say, "sit your ass down, Robbin," sharply, making it clear I'm not bullshitting him.

"I was just playing, Sixx, damn." He sniffles, wiping his nose.

"You don't 'play' like that." I throw at him.

An intense silence falls over all of us and Vivian just brushes what's left of the coke off of her chest and straightens her dress before giving him a soft, reassuring smile.

Great. Is she fucking him, too?

When we get to the Cathouse, Vivian stays close to Steven and eventually Sally when the two of them warm up to each other.

We make it up to V.I.P. and Viv makes a point to try to avoid sitting beside me.

But I wait for her to sit and I'm sitting right beside her with a smug smirk while she glares at me.

"What's wrong, baby?" I lean into her ear and ask over the loud music and she just shakes her head.

I pat myself on the back when she eventually gets up, mumbling about the bathroom, and leaves us.

After a few (several) lines of blow, I head to the bathroom to piss, deciding to stop by the women's restroom to see what the hell Vivian's doing.

She probably snuck out of the window.

I hear the very faint but distinct sound of Vivian crying, guilt stabbing at me.

I think I took it too far earlier when I called her those shitty things.

I just go to the men's bathroom and splash my face with water, the buzzing of coke beginning to numb my mind, thoughts of my imploding marriage, band, and life, being locked up and discarded into a black sea of, "it can wait."

One thing is retrieved, though, thrown a life line and brought back from the depths.

I look at myself in the mirror, staring myself down as if saying, "don't you fucking do it."

Once the high kicks in, I can just feel Sikki scrape me from control, locking me away momentarily.

Next thing I know, I'm standing in the women's bathroom, Vivian still sniffling in the stall...I don't think she knows I'm in here.

"I got you this far, you fuck." The demon snarls in my ear.

I swallow and clear my throat, making Vivian go silent.

"Viv, what the fuck's wrong, now?" I ask and she sighs, staying quiet.

"Nothing, Nikki." She says and I scoff, rubbing my jaw.

"It's clearly not 'nothing' because I heard you blubbering the past ten minutes." I point out and she opens the stall, door, looking me dead in the eye before pushing past me.

"A lot on my mind, alright?" She mumbles, going to the sink and I lean against the stall, crossing my arms.

"Like what?"

"I don't wanna talk about it, Nikki." She tells me, trying to wipe the smeared mascara away.

"Well, I can't read your mind, Vivian, so if you're upset with me about something th--"

Her head hangs low, a small sob coming from her throat, tears dropping into the sink, her hands white-knuckling the side of the porcelain…

"I'm upset with you about everything." She admits to me, sorrow lacing her words.

I haven't seen her like this since Vanity aired our dirty laundry out.

"Why didn't you tell me sooner? Why didn't you act like--" she cuts herself off, and I realize she's referring to me telling her I loved her while I was in Japan.

"Where were you, Vivian?" I ask her out of nowhere, getting defensive.

"Where was I?" She turns to look at me, wiping her tears, rolling her jaw. "Where were you?" She snaps at me. "Where have you been the last four years?" She asks me.

"I'm not doing this shit here." I grumble, turning to go.

"You asked me what was wrong, Nikki, and I'm telling you what's wrong because you asked--"

"--I also asked where you've been while I've been out of town, Vivian!" I turn on my heel, snarling.

"I've been at home, Nikki!" She yells back. "I've been here, and I've been here for six years! Thinking you'd be right here with me but you're not! That's what's wrong! I've wasted six years of my life on someone who--"

"--You wasted six years of your life?!" I laugh out humorlessly. "How the fuck do you think I feel? How many things I've missed out on because, 'oh, nah, my wife wouldn't like that'?!" I scream.

"Must not have been too bad because you sure as hell weren't passing up the opportunity to have a year and half long affair with Vanity!" She wretches and it takes everything in me not to tell her I know about her little thing she has going with Duff.

"Ya know what, I felt bad for calling you an evil bitch and a cunt earlier but fuck it, you are." I reach for the door and I feel something hit at my back, her heel hitting the floor by my boots.

I turn at glare at her, her emerald eyes lined black, thick lashes blinking slowly, lips parted slightly as she takes in a heavy breath.

I take a step to her, then another and she steps back to the sink.

When our lips meet, I'm putting her on the sink, wasting no time to get her dress pushed up her legs.

"Wait, wait, wait," she gasps out, nudging me away while I unbuckle my belt.

I catch my breath as she gets off the sink and turns around, looking at me in the mirror.

I just lift her dress and bend her over, pulling her panties to the side before--

"God, you are so high." She grumbles, pulling me from my imagination, picking her heel up and shoving past me.

Damn her.

I follow after her back to the guys, and within another hour, once she realizes she's just going to be babysitting us--since she's not fun enough to participate in the coke, pills, and booze--she stands up.

"I'm about to head home." She tells us, and the boys groan.

"Oh, c'mon, Viv!" Steven complains as she leans down to hug him and tell him bye.

"I'm tired, Stevie." She states, chuckling, wrapping her arms around Slash's neck from behind him, and he pats her hand.

"See ya," he tells her.

"Bye." She says. "It was nice to meet you." She says to Sally, next.

"You, too." Sally replies.

"C'mere, c'mere, c'mere!" Robbin calls over the music and she raises a brow and stand behind him, leaning over to see what he wants.

He just grabs her hand and puts it over his heart.

"You feel that?" He asks her.

"Yeah, it feels like you're about to go into cardiac arrest." She comments.

"It's because of you." He dopily replies and she rolls her eyes and pushes at his chest, shaking her head.

"You're a mess." She tells him and he kisses the top of her hand.

"Goodnight, Viv, it was good to see you again." He tells her.

"It was good to see you, too." She replies, smiling, before pulling away. "Bye, Nikki." She says to me in passing.

"Fuck you, too!" I call after her as she heads to the stairs.

The next time I'd see her, she'd be trying to help Sally, Duff, and Steven resuscitate me, and eventually trying to throw herself from the balcony in an attempt to not be left behind while I moved on to where ever the hell we go when we die, begging me not to leave her. I didn't, thanks to adrenaline...but even if I did die, if I had anything to do with it, I still wouldn't have left her.

#nikki sixx #nikki sixx x oc #nikki sixx fanfiction #gateway drug

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smileysuh · 4 years ago

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hi hi :) I just finished reading Tease and omg 🥵 I know you're working on lots of wips (I've read all your fics at least once oops haha and I'm looking forward to all the new ones) but if you ever felt like writing another monsta x one?? 👀 cause it was SO fucking good. I think you really encapsulated their personalities well. that's one of your greatest strengths as a fic writer I think! sometimes reading other work I can get taken out of the story by the way people write cause it doesn't seem accurate to the person they're writing about but you ALWAYS do it perfectly even with the AUs. my favorite will always be the frat AU haechan though I have a big soft spot for that man and that fic is by far my favorite out of all the nct fics I've read -🦦

asdfghjkl THANK YOU! not me typing out a whole response to it and then having to do it a second time oh my gOSH TUMBLR WHAT THE HECK

I'm glad you enjoyed Tease!!! i definitely agree that my greatest strength is character, which is hoenstly why i might get into screen writing and get jobs being a character based writer cuz i have 8 years experience writing imagines (and stepping into tv character's personalities) on my old blog @obscure-imagines which has a FUCK TON OF CONTENT if you go check out it's masterlist and the range of characters offered there

I usually only focus on Hyungwon so i really had to like, go research Joohoney and Shownu separately and then watch crack videos of them interacting to get a vibe for their specific dynamic! I'm glad it worked out :) i've been a fan for a year but never wrote about them it's nice to tear the bandaid off now that i have a vibe with those two

i'm gonna respond to your stuff about feeling out of fics when they don't match their character/irl people in the tags cuz im a safe space blog and my opinions have slight negativity about a few things so they're in tags to be skipable :)

on the topic of more monstax content i will DEFINITELY be writing more! If you check out my to do list on my blog, you can see most of the projects I have on the go, as of right now for Monsta x we have these :)

im- not me realizing as i put this here that every single fic features hyungwon- i promise to add some changkyun solo stuff too SDFGHJKL; as i said, it's not updated and i know for a fact i have some Changkyun vibes in my drafts... which have 150 things in them on tumblr im-

im a mess, but thank you so much for your wonderful comment, it means a lot to me :) and i hope i can continue to give you characters who fit their irl counterparts :)

#in the tags cuz this is safe space and imma bitch about a few things #and want people to be able to avoid negativity if they'd like #but ok #so i totally agree with you about feeling out of a fic when someone #acts uncharacteristic #like not me naming names or anything cuz i dont read ateez fics #but for example when i see hard mingi in some other fics being a sadist #im like- OUR SWEET BOY????#like you can put them into new au's and make them demons or shit like that #but there's still like base values for people that you gotta stay true to #and dont even get me started on those blurb/fics that are like insert your bias #like-???????#thats just a blank slate #every person reacts differently to stuff and i feel like it's so-#to slot your own bias in is so unpersonal #like im here to love on my bOY #and i want him to be as much like the real guy as POSSIBLE

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otterknowbynow · 5 years ago

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Altean Home Economics (19/?)

Goo is great, but Hunk sure would feel better if they had kitchen access, even if that does mean figuring out some extraterrestrial foreign substances and ending up with a lot more than he bargained for. Set between 2x07 "Space Mall" and 2x08 "The Blade of Marmora," stretching time a little bit.

all chapters in this tag | full work on ao3

Yeskia has to hand it to Edessa; the woman knows how to use her influence when she needs to. There’s not even enough time for Elian to work himself back into too much of a huff before she’s showed up at the council room doors with a soothing presence, Ren, and Jenis -- the engineer-slash-farmer. Jenis is known to Yeskia mainly for being the person to call when there are problems with the grid -- though they’re not always easily found. She knows the youngsters rely on them for glodworm glisten during the third-season rush, though, and that they’ve always been kind to Ren, so she has a decent soft spot for them anyway. Plus, she can understand not wanting to be found when it’s often Elian doing the finding.

“So, what happened when Ren and Edessa activated the signal, then?” Lisanne is asking now, and Yeskia is once again grateful to them for producing the necessary questions.

Jenis rocks back on their heels, looking over at where Edessa is sitting in a chair in the corner, passing tarts to Ren every few minutes. They take a breath and look back to Lisanne, Elian, and Yeskia, arrayed around the councilors’ table.

“Well, you see, councilors, we never rerouted the citizens’ array to its own signal tower, so it’s still connected to the old city.”

“The city that was lost hundreds of sun cycles ago? The city that sank below the ocean as it was being evacuated by the early expeditions? That city?” That’s Elian, glaring at Jenis over his glasses, and Yeskia can’t help but feel a pang of sympathy as she recognizes it as the same glare he’s directed at her hundreds of times -- it’s highly disconcerting to be on the receiving end, she knows from experience.

“Um, yes,” Jenis says quietly, now shuffling their feet in an odd little dance of nerves. “That’d be the one.”

“Then...is it even broadcasting off-planet?” Lisanne asks, frowning.

“Yes! Yes, it is,” they answer, looking toward Lisanne but not quite at them. “But to anyone who receives the signal, it will look like it originated in the city -- unless they’re particularly equipped to look deeper.”

Hunk and Coran are both typing rapidly on console keyboards, and there’s a growing restlessness Keith can feel through his entire body that’s threatening to explode at any moment. What is taking them so long? At least when Hunk wanted everyone to come mess around in the kitchen, that could happen while they were still on the way to the Blades headquarters -- if anything, it was a welcome distraction. But now they’re stuck here in this nowhere part of space, not only still hours away from the Blades base, but completely ground to a halt by some joker with a distress beacon.

Trying to trace this stupid signal isn’t getting them any closer to their destination; it isn’t getting him any closer to answers. If all they found is ruins, why isn’t everyone back at the castle and set to take off again? Why are they orbiting around this nothing planet with some broken rocks under the ocean? Who cares where the signal originated? If it isn’t clear by now where it came from -- if it’s been deliberately hidden somehow -- then whoever sent it clearly doesn’t want to be found, and they’re wasting time! They’re wasting time they could be spending getting him closer to knowing the truth about himself, and maybe even something about his mom --

“Keith, buddy, you okay over there? You look like you’re about to break your station just to see if you can.” Hunk’s voice cuts into his thoughts, and Keith sees he’s looked up from the console, his hands hovering over the keyboard and an expression of open concern on his face. Keith also realizes he’s been clutching his fists so tightly the nails have dug into his hands and from the wetness on his right palm, in at least one instance they’ve drawn blood.

“Uh, yeah…’m fine,” he mutters, wincing, and silently uncurls his fingers to wipe the blood surreptitiously on his pants. “How’s the tracing going?” he adds, loudly enough for Coran to hear him too.

“It’ll be better once we hear from Number Five,” says Coran in a harried tone that’s matched by the speed of his fingers on the keyboard. “She should have a better time of it than we are -- it’s like trying to trace back a needle that’s been cut off of its thread, which was already invisible, and -- I don’t know; I’m running out of metaphor! Simile! Whichever!”

“It’s that bad,” Hunk adds, frowning determinedly. He clicks the comms connection back on to ask, “Pidge, what’s your status?”

“Approaching the beacon origin,” comes Pidge’s voice, sounding nothing if not determined. It looks like it’s in this crumbly old -- something -- building -- I’m gonna hop out of my lion and swim down.”

“Aw, man -- Pidge is gonna swim? Wish I was there to see it.” Lance snorts, and Keith can’t help but roll his eyes hearing it.

“Yeah, because it would’ve been better if we’d sent you down to try and figure out a piece of alien tech,” he mutters.

“What was that?” Shiro asks, and Keith clamps his mouth shut. Oops.

“Nothing -- just waiting to hear more from Pidge.” He puts an emphasis on her name that he hopes makes it clear that Lance can shut up any time.

“Aren’t we all? Seems like it’s gonna be a minute, though -- not sure she’s exactly built for quick swimming.” He’s joking, it’s clear, but Keith really wishes he wouldn’t. Not when he’s already tense.

“Lance, buddy, that is not the most helpful you could be right now,” Hunk says, a bit of tightness creeping into his voice, though it’s clear he’s trying to keep it gentle.

“Also, I have a suit, genius,” Pidge says flatly. I Lance’s comments have gotten to her at all, her voice doesn’t show it. “As you may recall, it has a propulsion system.”

“A propulsion system I could outswim in my sl--” Hunk flips a switch, cutting Lance off mid-sentence, but it seems he’s only muted transmissions from the blue lion, since a moment later they hear Pidge.

“I’m in, and the terminal seems navigable,” she says, and Keith is torn between relief she’s found something and frustration that this means even more of a delay. He taps his fingers together restlessly to try to relieve some of the tension he can feel building back up in his body.

“Good -- can you trace the signal? Get us some actual coordinates instead of this zipping and zapping across the whole freaking continent?” Hunk still sounds harried, and Keith wonders vaguely for a moment if all his stress is just from this.

“Looks like...yes!” Pidge is victorious, and even though Keith can’t see her grin he can hear it as she says, “Putting them through to you all now. Lance? Allura? We’ll meet you there.”

“What if they are particularly equipped to look deeper?” Yeskia asks, keeping her tone non-accusatory. Jenis may be responsible for most of the outpost’s technology infrastructure, and therefore to blame -- but that’s also a reason to be understanding of them, she thinks. Imagine having to throw together a new interface with essentially some scrap metal and a shoestring. She certainly couldn’t have done a better job.

“If they are, then they will, and they’ll figure out it’s come from us,” Jenis says, glancing at her face and then away again. “And I suppose we’ll find out soon enough if they have.”

Elian appears to still be parsing out what Jenis is saying, eyebrows lowered over his tiny spectacles. Lisanne is frowning, but in more of a pensive way than Elian. Yeskia’s not sure what to make of this.

“So, we meant to send a signal -- or Zoric did, anyway -- for emergency aid. We sent a signal for emergency aid. And now someone might respond to it. Is that right?” She says it slowly, clearly, looking from Lisanne’s face to Elian’s, hoping to get her fellow council members around to at least a place of calm, if not acceptance.

“That seems about correct,” says Jenis, relief showing through their whole body as their shoulders lower and their round face relaxes. Yeskia is only too happy to take the pressure off of them -- not relaying the signal through a proper local tower was an oversight, but the outcome here may well be the same.

“Then I don’t see this as a problem. This is what Zoric intended to do. Councilors, I move we dismiss Engineer Jenis and begin to discuss our far more pressing issue -- the fatality that moved Zoric to discharge the alarm in the first place. Losing a citizen means this disease is a real threat now.” She clasps her trembling hands in front of her and adds, “A threat to all of us.”

#altean home economics #nineteen (short) chapters in folks....here we are #vld #voltron #vld fic #keith kogane #hunk (voltron)#hunk garrett #pidge (voltron)#katie holt #coran (voltron)#I don't know what tags people use.jpg #per usual!!!#scribbles #the entuk ocs I care about keep multiplying smh.....keep...coming up with more information about all of them and it's li k e #anyway!!!!#love them!!!

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rocketmanmadden · 6 years ago

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I’m not ready Pt. 1

Requested by @deliciousrain19

Taron Egerton tells a reporter he's ready for kids soon, which surprises reader. She needs more time. This hurts Taron. The more angst, the better.

Masterlist!

Warnings- all angst, talks of sex (not a lot and not in a sexual way), some swearing

A/N- I’m literally a teenager and in no place to have kids for like 10 years but I literally don’t think I could ever turn down having Taron’s children idc my age oop-

Also for some reason it’s not letting me tag some accounts?? I have the username of the requesters right but the past few times it hasn’t been letting me tag them, it just says no blog found but I’m able to message them under the same name so I’m sorry!

You wake up to your alarm set on your phone at 8:45 am and roll out of bed, running downstairs to your living room making sure you don’t miss Taron on tv this morning at 9. You realize you have about 10 minutes or so before it starts, making yourself a cup of tea and cuddling up on the couch, finishing whatever program is on before the talk show he’s appearing on begins.

You watch every single one of his interviews, you always have ever since you got together 3 years ago. Even though it’s never anything new you hear him say, just him going on about you or his new movies, you wouldn’t miss it. He found it comforting knowing you were watching, and you just found him adorable on the TV.

He comes on and starts talking about the usual, he discusses the movie for a few minutes before you end up getting somehow brought up. You take a sip of your tea while listening to him before the interviewer asks him a question, and his answer leaves you in utter shock

“You’ve been together for a little while now, what are your thoughts on children? Can we expect any Egerton babies soon?”

If you didn’t almost choke on your drink at the question, you did at the answer

“Oh goodness I love kids” his face lights up with a smile. “I hope so, I really am ready for kids. I’m 29, in a great relationship, it seems to me everything adds up perfectly. To answer the question fully, yeah hopefully soon.”

You put your cup of tea down so you can put your face in your hands, gently rubbing your forehead taking all of this in

You don’t know how to feel about this. Shock? Angry? Wanting to break down and cry? It seems at the moment you were feeling all of the above. How dare someone even ask a question like that, something so personally and meaningful to a couple. And why would Taron never think to tell you he felt this way? He never ever discussed kids with you, this is just so sudden.

Yeah, you might both be grown adults but that means nothing when having kids. You just aren’t ready yet, and you don’t want kids right now. Not with his work schedule and him not being home all the time, you aren’t doing this alone when you don’t want it yet in the first place.

About 2 hours go by of you worrying about what’s gonna happen when Taron gets home, before you hear your front door open

“Y/N love? Where are you?” He calls out before you respond with “couch, living room” closing your laptop and sitting it on the end table.

He runs into the living room and shoots you a big smile, feeling confident as he usually does when he finishes an interview “So what did you think?”

You sit there for a minute trying to decide if you should give him a “great” with a fake smile or a straight up “I hated it”, quickly realizing neither of those will work, and you just need to talk to him and tell him the truth.

“I think we need to talk about it” you say patting the couch on the empty space next to you. “Sit” which he quickly places himself on the couch. “Is everything okay? I thought I did good.” He asks worriedly with a look of confusion plastered on his face

“You did T, but that reporters questions were highly inappropriate to ask anyone”, your response causing him to furrow his eyebrows, not understanding. “What exactly about it was inappropriate love? I don’t seem to be on the same page as you are”

You tried to go lightly but at this point your confused and worked up. “You don’t ask someone when they’re going to knock up there girlfriend on live television Taron! It’s inappropriate!” You exclaim, it finally clicking with him as he sighs a soft “oh”

“I don't reckon that’s how he worded it. He was just simply curious” he tries telling you but only making you feel worse with his last sentence

“It is none of his business Taron, it’s mine. I’d hope I’d be carrying the child at least. You told him before you told me. Hearing this live where a million other people can was a lot to take in this morning, you should’ve talked to me about this, not him, me.” You try to say calmly but accidentally yell at him

“Y/N, don’t talk nonsense. Of course you’d be carrying the child. I’m sorry I didn’t talk about this with you before, so please, let’s talk about it now” he takes your hand in his and holds it. “I just got so excited at the thought of kids, I really want to have one soon”

“Well I don’t” You accidentally blurt out before he slowly unlaces his hand from yours, his eyes saddening. “Y-you don’t?” His voice breaks. “But why not?”

“I’m just not ready yet. This is just so sudden and you have a job where you’re constantly all over the place and it’s just not the right time” you try letting him down easy before he stands up, pacing around in front of you. “My work is the best excuse you have? Or is it that you don’t want to take responsibility and step up and be a mum. People have it a lot worse than you, and they still be a parent. Or is it you don’t love me anymore? You don’t want to have a baby with me.” He’s chokes out and wipes a tear before it runs down his face

“Taron” you shake your head, standing up off the couch and in front of him. “It isn’t like that at all and you know that. I can take the responsibility any day, don’t even give me that bullshit. How often do I go out and get wasted and party? Almost never because I’m mature as hell. And don’t even start with the ‘you don’t love me anymore’ because you know I love you more than anyone in this world. I’m really just not ready for this yet” you cross your arms

“Well you don’t get to make every decision Y/N! It’s always whatever you want.” He shouts

“When it’s a decision that means I have to have sex and it ends up putting a child in my body and the life of a human being in my hands then yeah I do get what I want Taron! You want a kid so bad, carry your own fucking child! Until then, I’m not having your kid right now, I’m sorry” you take a step closer to him before he backs away and wipes his eyes

“Fine then” is all he can say before he slowly starts to walk away

“Taron please…”

“Not right now Y/N. I’m going in the basement and I don’t want you to follow me down there. Just give me my space and leave me alone” he walks away

You fall back into the couch putting your head in your knees, ready to burst out in tears. You hated hurting him and you could tell you broke his heart, you had no clue how badly he wanted children and you yelling at him didn’t help the situation, but you aren’t ready yet and he can’t get mad at you for that. Children need to be a mutual decision, but you don’t want him upset and you need to make things right. You know he doesn’t want you down there so you decide to text him

“Baby can we talk?”

“I’m so sorry”

“Please respond T, I know you’re reading them”

“What do you want me to fucking say Y/N!?” He screams up from the basement before starting to stomp up the steps and whipping the door open, walking straight past you up the other flight of stairs to the bedroom, you quickly chasing after him.

“What are you doing love?” You stand at the doorway as he grabs a backpack, putting some clothes in it.

He continues throwing things in his bag, not even looking at you when he answers. “I know we don’t walk out when we’re in fights, but I have to this time. I’m just so upset and I can’t fix it right now. I booked a hotel for myself for the night, I don’t want to be in this house at the moment, we’ll talk tomorrow” He zips up his bag and starts making his way down stairs.

“Please don’t go” your eyes filling up with tears as he opens the door. “Don’t cry Y/N/N, please. I have to, I need time to think and just be alone for a little bit” he begins walking to the Uber already parked outside your house.

“B-Bye” you call out, tears falling down your cheeks. Him just responding by nodding his head, leaving in the Uber, and leaving you in your doorway in tears.

For the first time in a long time, you slept alone that night. The other side of the bed cold, where Taron should be.

#taron egerton fanfic #taron egerton x you #taron egerton fluff #taron egerton fanfiction #taron egerton imagine #taron egerton fic #taron egerton x reader #taron egerton #taron egerton angst

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ysalamiri-queen · 5 years ago

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2019 Fic in Review

Inspired by @myevilmouse I’m going to sum up all the writing I’ve been up to the past year. I’m really proud of what I’ve accomplished, and thanks to you all for the encouragement to put my ideas out into the world! This has been a year of trying new things, and really growing as an author I feel… And wow according to AO3 I’ve written about 400k words in the past 12 months, damn. So let’s get to the list, going from the beginning of the year to the end, and as always please heed the tags on these before reading.

Note: As I go back, I’m realizing a lot of the links were messed up or are just straight missing. I am on the Mobile App so things can get messy. Please visit my works page on AO3 HERE to see all of these on my page under JessKo and my other pseuds.

1 Late Night at the Slab

Idea: Filling a prompt for the Thryce server in which some, uh, unique Chiss anatomy was assigned.

Result: A 3-way with Thrawn, Arihnda, and Eli and my first foray into the more Xeno side of things in a Modern AU setting. Yeehaw!

2 The Trouble With Free-Roaming Ysalamiri

Idea: Based on some adorable ysalamiri cuddles art by @strength-through-order I wanted to write some Thranto fluff.

Result: Ysalamiri-filled Thranto fluff X’D

3 Inquisitor’s Debt

Idea: What if the Grand Inquisitor changed sides at the end of Rebels season 1?

Result: Some fun throwbacks with Obi-Wan and Caleb Dume leading up to Quizzy defecting with Ezra.

4 Ancient Stems

Idea: Eli Week drabbles based on the Vanto Week prompts.

Result: A silly buzz droid narrative with Thrawn and some cute slice of life Eli backstory/Ascendancy days bits.

5 Charnsuka

Idea: Kinky stuff with Lord Garmadon when he’s an Anacondrai.

Result: Kinky stuff with Lord Garmadon when he’s an Anacondrai. Sorry Zane!

6 Caged Like Prized Birds

Idea: Again inspired by the awesome Chiss anatomy and Thrux drawings by @strength-through-order , I wanted to craft a narrative around Armitage, as a young man, stumbling upon a clone of Thrawn.

Result: Man, this might just be one of my favorite things I’ve ever written, had so much fun plotting it out and the smut is mmm! Tentacles everywhere~ I’ve gone back to re-read this a lot, I’ll admit it. I hope you all enjoyed it too.

7 Quiet On Set

Idea: Must. Write. Talos.

Result: A cute little platonic x-reader with everyone’s favorite Skrull. This was my first MCU fic too.

8 Diagnostic

Idea: Wanted to apologize to Zane for the damages done in Charnsuka with some Glacier shipping fluff.

Result: A silly glacier thing leading to a bit of foolery. I’m happy with it!

9 Heron Soaring

Idea: A continuation of the plot line from Heron Rising with Kanan and Thrawn.

Result: Too many feels… but some great sex to soften the blow, Kanera too!

10 Patron

Idea: Responding to a tumblr prompt from @wukeskywalker regarding Thrawn commissioning LOADS of artworks of Eli.

Result: More Thranto fluff! I see a trend here…

11 Black Heron

Idea: Kanan x Pryce for @myevilmouse , I think this was our first ‘collaboration’ on something!

Result: Juahir hires a special someone to show Arihnda a good time!

12 Red Heron

Idea: @star-wars-rebels-4 is always an amazing wealth of ideas for Grand Inquisitor, and encouraged a work featuring him and Kanan.

Result: Delicious back alley smut when an undercover Jedi is caught!

13 Warm Homecoming

Idea: Give my and a friend's OCs some cute fluff.

Result: OC fluff and a vacation to Hoth!

14 sowing the seeds

Idea: Add something cute to the spank war project.

Result: Another contender for my ‘favorite thing I’ve ever written’ rank. Two chapters of pining, cooking lessons, and sweet slick smut.

15 Red Frost

Idea: After watching “The Evil of Frankenstein” with @sneakybunyip ‘s amazing movie night group, I wanted to do something fun with Victor and Hans.

Result: A fun little adventure fic with some huddling for warmth to boot. Victor and Hans are the hammer-horror-verse Thranto send tweet.

16 a setting sun to hide the ruins

Idea: What if I tortured Kanan to the point he turned evil and joined the Inquisitors (and went a little insane in the process)

Result: Instead of torture, let’s just use some serum that drives him mad. Perfect. Smut ahoy, pretty much a dead dove type fic.

17 Pinktown

Idea: When browsing abandoned towns in Florida, I came across Flamingo… what if Thrawn had been exiled here instead.

Result: An alternate history of Thrawn’s exile and eventual discovery by the Empire. Huge thanks for @badgerandk on this one for the perfect epilogue and beta.

18 the sun rises to only illuminate the stranger i have become

Idea: Setting sun… part 2! But it’s actually what happens before sun?

Result: How Kanan ended up where he is for ‘a setting sun’... lots of imp smut and again, it's sort of a dead dove style fic.

19 Frozen Over

Idea: Ar��alani x Eli Vanto

Result: Somehow me and my writing partner ended up at sensory deprivation focus on this one.

20 Shape of Honor

Idea: Well, this one started in 2018 but ‘finished’ in 2019. Still working on the epilogue. Lots of tweaks… If you are not familiar, this is my AU in which it explores how the Thrawn novel and Rebels show would be altered if Palpatine distrusted Thrawn from their first meeting and accused him of being a Chiss spy. Vaguely inspired by the film The Shape of Water.

Result: Well it's nearly a novel now, isn’t it. This was a great adventure in learning how to create compelling story arcs. I’m extremely satisfied with how it is shaping (lol) up.

21 Datura Stamonium

Idea: Thrawnbine ovi smut.

Result: Oops it has plot now, a whole backstory with Eli and such and so fourth. Will need further stories told…

22 Desert Entropy

Idea: Luke/Wedge modern AU shenanigans.

Result: Also pulled Nath/Wyl and the Rogue Squad/Alphabet Squad peeps into this. Set in Vegas, Luke and Wedge meet and have a cute little romance, but some legal troubles set them back (Palpatine, as always, is That Bitch™) Very happy ending!

23 The Great Eli and Thrawn Prank War

Idea: See Chapter 1: Mullet Thrawn

Result: This thing really grew up, and thanks to all the contributors for allowing me to join in! My contributions were: 7-Bombs Away! In which a bit of drama brews and Thrawn makes a paint bomb that forces him and Eli back into being roomates. 11-Tooka Troube 2: Electric Boogaloo in which Eli finds his quarters slowly filling up with Tooka plush toys, and then something huge goes off in supply. 17-The Bitch is Back In which who knew Thrawn could sing?!

24 Clipped Wings to Keep Us from Flying

Idea: Continuing the story line from Caged Like Prized Birds

Result: Dragging Eli and the OG Thrawn into this, seeing that their stories were left untold in the first work. Also Armitage and the clone are up to all sorts of cool things. Still a WIP, on the list to keep working on this year!

25 I’ll do what I can.

Idea: Some Ronan/Krennic feels post Treason

Result: A Ronan character study that I really needed to get out of my system and finally a stable alliance between Krennic and Thrawn!

26 Purple Heron

Idea: @punk--kenobi and I concocted some fun Kanan/Zeb/Hera smut featuring Lasat heat cycles.

Result: Ah this came out so cool, full of emotion and wonderful imagery. Massive kudos to @punk--kenobi for beta-ing my portion and contributing some of the best smut one can find!

27 Ninjago Angst Week 2019

Idea: Do some 1-shots for Ninjago Angst Week

Result: ow right in the feels. Each character got a highlight in their own ‘dark retelling of a canon or canon adjacent event’ chapter.

28 Vertigo

Idea: Thing’s don’t go right planetside for Eli, Pik, and Waffle in Treason.

Result: Big oof. I hope Eli can one day forgive me… I even put strain on the end game Thranto! Bittersweet ending and lots of angst.

29 More Than Just a Treat

Idea: What is Obi Wan up to in the desert…

Result: Aunt Beau and baby Luke baked him cookies obviously!

30 Datura Metel

Idea: Continuing the Datura cycle…

Result: Just how Eli ended up where he did in the first installation.

31 Here & Now

Idea: Some Thranto Fluff! For @jewelliffer

Result: A camping trip for shore leave! And a marriage proposal for extra sugar.

32 Monster Under the Bed

Idea: Benevolent Boogeyman Chiss

Result: Modern AU Thranto spooky sillies. Bit of an intense climax but they talk it out!

33 Haunted by Sentiment

Idea: Nath is in denial of being the Squad Dad for @glassprowlers

Result: Nath’s very bad no good oh so terrible day! It's very silly and I really like how it ended up, the title is way more serious than the story itself XD

34 Pulse

Idea: Werewolf AU Lavashipping

Result: Oops Kai is a werewolf! Good thing Cole is here to help him figure out how to press on.

35 Stories from Area 51

Idea: remember the raid Area 51 meme? I do! Gotta clap them alien cheeks!

Result: Oh no it got PLOTTY! Pretty much all of my favorite characters and ships cherry-picked and plopped down into a Men In Black style facility in the middle of the desert. I really have a thing for the desert huh…

36 Good Day

Idea: The “truth” behind the “Good day, Lieutenant Vanto” from Thrawn in Treason.

Result: Oh stars the FEELS! Thrawn is in deep water and he KNOWS IT! GAH!

37 Fur Ball

Idea: Chiss are mogwai/gremlins…

Result: Silly Thranto fluff. Thrass shows up too! Feeding them after midnight is actually a good idea here… Grow your own ideal man!

38 Came Back Haunted

Idea: A mission fic centered around the @peters-pumpkin-day prompts.

Result: Ice planet survival with Tarkin, Krennic, Galen, and Ronan.

39 Sewn Together

Idea: This drawing actually is what lead to the fic-

Result: A fairly unique reuniting of Thrawn and Eli after both return to the Ascendancy.

40 Spiked Heron

Idea: Oh no… Kanan gets himself in deep poodoo this time.

Result: Devaronians really like humans huh? The next chapter is half way written I swear it is coming soon!

41 A Colder Embrace

Idea: Thrawn/Purrgil/Ezra and Luke/Wampa for SW Rare Pairs.

Result: It's very cold on Hoth… and even colder in space.

42 Surround

Idea: Luke/Wedge for SW Rare Pairs

Result: Luke has to confront Wedge post ESB regarding what is, essentially, his deserting the Rebels.

43 What Happens Planetside…

Idea: Eli/Pik/Waffle for SW Rare Pairs

Result: heheh a scrumptious Eli sandwich! And surprise tentacles because, well, why not?

44 Hesperidium

Idea: Fluffy Kylux for the Kylux Secret Santa event

Result: Ah its so sweet you might get a cavity

45 Reanimator

Idea: Lovecraftian eldritch horror Thranto

Result: This is the sort of project that it takes 2 months to fine tune each chapter, so bear with me, but I can promise a wonderful, creepy ride is ahead!

46 Floral

Idea: Luke/Faro for SW Rare Pairs. Enjoy the Jedi lovin’, @myevilmouse

Result: Sex pollen and accidentally defecting from the Empire. Whoops!

47 The Harch

Idea: Bouncing off of THIS art by @mamidlo , we worked together to create this plot. Very much inspired by the Hammer Horror films, such as Dracula and Frankenstein.

Result: A fun and spooky romp of Kallus and Zeb getting trapped in a creepy castle featuring mind controlled drones and a species-obsessed Harch. This was my first time posting the entire story at once, too!

Wow, I can not believe how much has been written this year. Thank you all again for reading and kudos-ing and your amazing comments. I’d not be here without the support and love <3 Cheers to 2020 and much more fic ahead!

#ysalamiri-queen writes #year in review #too many tags XD so im not even goign to try

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aboysbestfriendishismum · 6 years ago

Text

Chapter 55 - Wine, puzzles and spoonmen (Part One)

In the previous chapter: Eddie and Angie woke up at her apartment. It's the third time in a row they sleep together but, although Eddie is constantly teasing her, they haven't had sex yet. Angie starts to get worried about this too and believes something's wrong. Eddie, Stone and Mike go to Roxy's on that same morning, right during Angie's shift at the diner. Eddie cheekily jokes, teases her, sends her subliminal love messages through juke box songs, then follows her in the back and kisses her; she thinks he's doing it on purpose so that their friends will find out about their relationship. The two of them have a brief argument but they soon make it up. Meg tells Angie about her new project: becoming a tattoo artist. She also understands Angie's worried about something and has her friend spill the beans. Angie confesses she has doubts about Eddie's physical attraction towards her. Meg tries to talk some sense into her and suggests her to set up a romantic night for Eddie and her at their apartment.

***

“Ian, can you come here a sec?” I call my coworker as I look through the sketchbook my roommate has just slipped on the counter top together with her purchases.

“What's up?” I hear him answer from afar.

“I need your help”

“Can't you do it by yourself? That guy who dropped the jarred Bolognese sauce made a mess!”

“Umph if that's Bolognese sauce, then I'm Julia Roberts!” I comment right when Hannigan comes back from the storage room, probably because of the commotion he heard.

“ANGIE?” he gives me a nasty look and I'd want to sink into the ground.

“Err I meant that it's a sauce produced in our beloved America! Healthy American food, tasty and nutritious... which gets inspiration from an Italian recipe to... to...” I try and make up for that as I address my audience, that is basically Meg, looking at me as if she could burst into laughing any minute, my boss and two perplexed customers, a young man and a fifty-something woman.

“To give a new interpretation of it?” the guy suggests from the snacks department.

“EXACTLY! A new interpretation. Different from the original”

“But as valid as the original” the boss adds.

“Very valid!” I say through my teeth.

“She's half Italian.” Meg explains to the customers “She'll be fucking fussing about everything but the sauce is good” the guy snickers and the lady shakes her head and walks towards the frozen foods.

“I'd have liked for you not to use the F word but you perfectly summed up my thinking” Hannigan's face relaxes and maybe I still have a job.

“Anyway it's all Ian's fault” I point out as soon as I see my colleague show up behind the back of the boss.

“What did I do?”

“I called you and you didn't came”

“Well, now I'm here, what's wrong?”

“Now Hannigan's here, I don't need you anymore”

“Can you please explain what the fuck's happening? I didn't understand a fucking thing!” the boss blurts out in the middle of our quarrel.

“I thought you couldn't say the F word here” Meg chimes in raising her hand as if she was at school.

“Not to custumers, but to employees... yes”

“Meg needs to buy some wine” I point at my roommate and the bottle she's placed on the counter.

“So what? Your shift ends at 13:00, you still have 10 minutes” Ian gives me a glazed look and right now I'd stick my thumbs into his eyes.

“It's not for the timing, it's that I can't sell alcohol...”

“Oh right! Well, you'll take care of that, right?” he asks to our boss.

“Yeah, sure Ian! I'll take care of that, I'm already here! By the way why should I have my paid personnel work when I can do everything by myself, right?”

“Uhm... ok, I'll go and put some more sawdust on that stain” Ian walks away and Meg can't resist this time and explodes laughing.

“Haha he's so dumb! Anyway isn't it funny that you cannot sell me wine, considering you're the one who'll drink it?” my friend remarks while Hannigan's ringing her items: red wine bottle, sliced bread, salmon, cheese, butter, various snacks.

“You're kind of dumb too, you know” I hide my face behind my palms.

“You could avoid telling me, at least...” mutters the boss and shakes his head.

“Who? Telling you what? I didn't say a word! Oops, I forgot the dessert, wait a minute!” Meg realizes the shit she just did and plays dumb, walking away towards the sweets section.

“She was just kidding anyway hehe” I say and I hope he doesn't notice I'm sweating.

“Of course”

“They're great!”

“Thank you Meg for grocery shopping for me and bringing all the bags up for four floors for me... that's what you just said, right?” my friend is putting everything into the fridge as I keep looking through her sketchbook.

“Exactly”

“Anyway you don't have to tell me you like them only to make me happy, I want a honest opinion”

“I am honest! I must say I like the ones in black and white better”

“Right? I'm not confident with colors yet. I mean, it's not like I can't draw stuff in colors. It's just, whenever I draw something and color it and I think it'd be supposed to end on someone's skin, everything seems shit to me. I did very few drawings in color”

“The flowers series is perfect, also the one with the animals” she's really good at drawing, I've always known that.

“They're just doodles to get started, to try some themes and styles”

“They're not doodles... what about this?” I focus on something drawn on a separated sheet of paper, folded and stuck in the middle of the book, which falls down to the floor as I turn the pages.

“Which one?” Meg distractedly turns around then closes the fridge door shut and runs up to me, snatching the paper from my hand as soon as she sees what it is “Oh this? This is nothing, this... I did it last night at the salon, during downtime, it sucks”

It's a page made entirely of pieces of a puzzle, they're all different in shape and shade but don't create any image. They're all blank and fill the whole sheet of paper except for a small space, a missing piece. Instead of the missing piece, in the layer underneath, you can see something that looks like live flesh and muscle tissue, and it's the only colored part of the drawing.

“It's simple but of immediate effect. This could really become a tattoo”

“Do you think so?”

“Yeah, it also seems very realistic. It's disturbing but in a positive sense, I like it!”

“Oh, well, thank you”

“What does it mean?”

“That I thank you for your compliment?”

“Haha no, what does the tattoo mean?”

“Ah”

“There's always a meaning behind, right? What would such a tattoo mean?”

“Well but... but this is not a tattoo is just an excercise, there's no reason behind”

“No?”

“No! Ok, now that you make me think about it, it could represent, I don't know, a missing piece in someone's life? I mean, everybody has their own void inside, right? Nobody feels 100% complete, there's always a piece of the puzzle we can't find or that we lost in the way. And it can be very different things: a person, a passion, a goal in life. What do you think?”

“I think it'd be the perfect matching tattoo for a couple”

“A couple? Hahaha I didn't know you were so romantic!”

“Not necessarily a romantic couple. Also between two big friends. Or brothers. Think about it, one person can have the incomplete puzzle tattoed and the other one can have the missing piece, which fits in it perfectly”

“That's an idea. It should represent a strong bond. Between brothers... or a parent and a child”

“Sure, also” the latter not necessarily being a strong bond...

“A mother... a mother could get this one, with one or more missing pieces depending on how many children she's got.And the children will be the missing pieces” and what if the missing parts are the parents instead?

“And they you'll inject ink in those chubby baby arms of theirs!”

“Hahahah shut up! They can have it done when they're grown up. OR... you can draw the missing pieces in the same tattoo, a little further” Meg takes the sketchbook from my hands and starts drawing as she speaks, taken from sudden inspiration.

“You can also put the name in it. Or initials”

“Which name?”

“Of the child. Inside the puzzle piece”

“Sure, if I knew the name”

“What do you mean? Haha how can a mother not know the name?”

Meg gives me a weird look, then smiles: “I meant, if only you could give me a name to have a try”

“Try with Angie” I smirk.

“A random one”

“Totally random”

“Don't even try, I'm not gonna get matching tattoos with you, forget it” she shakes her head as she starts sketching a cursive A inside the drawing.

“SHUT UP! I'm scared of getting my earlobes pierced, do you think I'd get a tattoo?! You're crazy”

“Oh, I see, you wanna get one with Eddie?”

“Come on, hurry up, we need to go shopping”

“Hahaha this enthusiasm from you surprises me, abstinence can be powerful”

“MEG!”

“Do you really think we can find a slutty nightgown in a thrift shop?” Meg doesn't watch her tone as we stop in front of Rummage Hall.

“Shhhhhh! I don't wanna buy a slutty nightgown, what the fuck are you talking about?”

“You don't want to? We went out exactly for that”

“You said I should wear something nice but not too much. I don't wanna go too far or Eddie will understand...”

“Excuse me, isn't that the purpose of the whole thing? Make him understand?”

“Yes but...”

“Well, slutty it is, then!” Meg enters the shop and I tag along.

“Shhhhhhhhhhhh”

“Anyway we're not gonna find shit in here” my friend takes long strides towards the clothing section.

“Where did you want to go? Nancy Meyer? I've got no money for that stuff”

“No, but Fantasy Unlimited is a short walk away”

“BUT THAT- ehm... that is an adult shop” I raise my voice too without noticing, then shush myself up.

“And you're an adult, aren't you? Anyway they've got very cute things, I bought a lot of stuff there, that for the record I use also to go to clubs. Well, now only to go to clubs” she shrugs as she's examining a satin-like robe and then puts it back.

“You just need two triangles of fabric to be dressed and look nice, Meg, but for me it's slightly different”

“You just need triangles a little bigger, what's the problem?”

“The problem is there are no triangles big enough for me”

“Shut up!”

“And I don't know if Eddie would like that, I mean, I don't know his preferences” maybe he doesn't like this kind of seduction artifices, maybe he prefers a simpler style, a more natural approach. Why the fuck am I not naturally hot?

“He's a guy and he's heterosexual, what would his preferences ever be? The more skin he sees, the happier he is” it's Meg's very easy answer.

“My skin?”

“Yes, why?”

“There's too much skin in my case, maybe I'd better hide it” who am I kidding? You don't just put something cute on and turn into an attractive girl. You must be able to carry it around and feel confident in those clothes. I don't even feel comfortable now that I have a coat on. I'm never comfortable, except sometimes, with Eddie. Why ruin everything? I'll just show up like this, with a coat on. Or my fleece robe, I mean, he's used at my shitty outfits, this would be nothing new.

“Angie, what the fuck are you talking about?? He wants to see your skin because he likes you, I thought that had been already established by now”

“He likes me, altogether”

“No, fuck altogether, fuck mind, personality and all the other bullshit”

“Bullshit?”

“Angie, he likes your body, you turn him on, he wants you”

“He wants me so much than I gotta dress slutty to have him notice me?”

“The point is not having him notice you, that's what you got totally wrong. He already noticed you, you're with him basically! The point is letting him know you're ready for the next step. And stimulate him a little, warming up the atmosphere”

“If you say so” warming up, uh?

“Fuck, Angie, you're gonna give me a nervous breakdown sooner or later!” Meg pinches the bridge of her nose and I'm afraid she's really about to explode.

“Don't yell! There's people here” I complain looking around in embarrassment and hoping no one is listening to our conversation.

“Listen, when you're together... don't you ever notice anything in him?”

“What do you mean?”

“Whenever you kiss or hug... I mean, when you make out and stuff”

“Well, he looks... invested, focused on me and always gives me those looks that-”

“Ok ok, the look of love. But apart from that? Nothing else? Can't you feel anything?”

“What am I supposed to feel?”

“You know, since you also sleep together... and stuff”

“Stuff and stuff... Couldn't you be more clear?”

“Have you ever felt... something knocking?”

“Knocking?”

“Hasn't mini-Eddie ever popped up to say hi?”

“Mini... MEG WHAT THE FUCK??”

“Does he get hard? You must have noticed”

“DID YOU LOSE YOUR FUCKING MIND?!”

“Shhh stop yelling, there's people here” Meg chuckles and I'd kick her ass.

“You're to lock up” I grab her from the sleeve of her jacket and try to drag her out of the shop with me but she pushes me towards the books section.

“Jeez, you're such a prude”

“I'm not a prude, I'm just... discreet”

“Ok so have you ever discreetly checked if he gets a boner or not when he's with you?”

“Apart from the fact that it doesn't mean anything”

“Sure, now Eddie gets random boners with no reason, after all he's in his full pubescent phase”

“You're joking but it's true. Erections are not necessarily linked to sexual arousal only. Do you know men can get erections at the point of death too under certain circumstances?”

“Oh really? And how many times did Eddie die recently?” she smirks.

“Anyway, that said... it's none of your business” I turn the other way trying to look upset and as I look towards the clothing section, where we were until five minutes ago, I spot something I hadn't noticed before.

“I already know anyway!” Meg yells behind my back as I walk away towards the object of my interest, then she catches up with me “Come on, don't be mad. I'm sorry. I just wanted to prove my point! And tease you a little”

“What do you think about this?” I turn around showing the item I've just taken from the line.

“I think that... well, considering it's Eddie, we would never find something better to stimulate him, not ever at Fantasy Unlimited. Buy it!”

******************************************************************************************************************************************

I'm halfway between the first and the second floor when I realize I took the stairs instead of the elevator. I stop for a second, contemplating how stupid I am and trying to remember the moment I put autopilot on. I probably lost some lucidity once I parked outside Angie's condo. Was the doorway open? I think so, 'cause I don't remember buzzing and I'd remember if I had heard her voice, even through that shitty croaky buzzer. It looks like spending more time together hasn't changed the effect that the idea of seeing her has on me. I hope it'll never change. I shake my head and start walking up the stairs, two steps at a time, to arrive sooner. I didn't exactly run but when I get to the fourth floor I feel flushed. I take a deep breath, pull up my backpack and walk down the hallway to Angie's apartment. The first weird thing I notice is a sound: the sound of a saxophone, which becomes louder and louder as I get closer. The second weird thing shows up as soon as I turn down the corner and see something's wrong in Angie's door. As I come closer I realize the hallway lamp casts a narrow beam of light on the floor inside the apartment and from that I notice that the door is half-closed. As far as I know Angie double locks herself up even in her bathroom when she's home alone, she'd never let the apartment door open. I walk up slowly and in the meantime I open my backpack and stick my hand in it to find something I could use as a weapon. I don't really wanna waste some good wine crashing the bottle on the head of an elusive burglar. But I also doubt the videotape of Harold and Maude would have the same effect. I grab the bottle from the neck as I push the door open and cautiously enter the apartment. And I immediately notice two things. First of all I see there's something on the floor and at first they seem parts of a colorful object that broke into pieces. But as I lean down to see better, I take some of these fragments in my hand and figure out it's nothing but flowers, abandoned on the floor. I grope my way looking for water or glass pieces of a fallen and then shattered vase but I can't find anything. Now that I think about it, there was no vase of flowers here, at least not until this morning. Almost at the same time, I realize it's not really flowers but only petals and they seem to form a path towards the living room. In that moment I figure out I can follow the path of the blue and red petals on the floor with my eyes because the entrance is not lit only by the external hallway light but also by some burning candles placed on the phone table and on the shoe cabinet.

Oh.

I quickly stand up, feeling stupid for mistaking a romantic setting for a crime scene. I finally close the door behind me and follow the way led by the flowers, walking towards the living room and imagining the different scenes I could find, which have all the same main character. But she's the one missing when I get in the room, all that I find is more candles, the small table laden with delicious food and further away, between the two couches, a basket with a composition of blue and red flowers, just like the petals on the floor. Your love is king sings Sade in the background, that is not exactly background, since the volume is pretty loud. And I'm just standing here, wine still in my hand, waiting for Angie to magically show up, maybe with a little ambush behind my back, covering my eyes with her hands or in any other way she came up with. But that doesn't happen. Suddenly I think I hear a sound, more sounds, actually an almost regular sequence of sounds. I go and turn down the music a little and the series of dull thuds sounds clearer. Maybe a romantic setting doesn't exclude a crime scene... what the fuck is happening?

“Angie?” I call her and get no answer.

The noise comes from the kitchen and that's where I go, quickly but with caution. At first I slowly open the door to peep in, then I fling it open when I see Angie at the window, leaning outside, basically perched on the windowsill.

“Angie!” I call her again but she can't hear me. So I put the wine bottle on the table and reach out for her, shaking her by her shoulder “Angie what th-”

“AAH! Oh shit, Y'ALL WATCH OUT DOWN THERE!” Angie jumps and starts yelling outside the window, then I can hear a sharp noise, like something shattered into pieces and that's when I look out too to see what's happening.

What's happening is that there a small group of people on the pavement just outside the condo, standing in a sort of circle around a red expanding stain, while a guy curses and gives the middle finger in our direction.

“Angie... what did you do? What does it mean?” I ask as we both stuck our heads back inside the apartment.

“I've just lost a bottle of red wine and a boot” Angie sighs and replies as if it's the most normal thing, finally turning to face me.

And I finally focus for a moment and see what's in front of me: Angie, dressed in just a black The Who t-shirt that leaves her legs almost entirely uncovered, eye liner or whatever it is on her eyes, with those little wings on the sides pointing upwards that make her look more like a kitty, a glossy lipstick on her lips, vanilla scent. Maybe the burglar hit and killed me and this is heaven.

“Well, I can make up for the wine because I brought some too...” I walk backwards towards the table without taking my eyes off her, pointing at the place where I must have put the bottle “and I can go out and get back your shoe in no time. So, you see? Everything has a solution hehe, don't worry” why the fuck am I laughing? Do I think I'm funny? And why am I sweating?

“I'm sorry you have to go, you've just arrived” she replies with an irresistible pout, moving away from the window and breaking eye contact looking down.

“No problem, I'll be back in a minute.” I'm about to leave the kitchen, then I come back in “Oh wait, I can't”

“Oh ok... why? I mean, it doesn't matter Eddie, don't... don't worry” she starts stuttering and I smirk inside, trying to look cool.

“I forgot I have to do something first”

“What?” she asks puzzled before I get close and take her face between my hands to kiss her.

“This. I'll be right back, ok?” I whisper right after.

“Ok” she smiles and I kiss her again.

“And just so you know, when I'm back I got a bunch of questions about all this to ask you”

“Ok” her smiles widens and I kiss her once more.

“I'm telling you in advance so I won't catch you unprepared”

“Ok...” she repeats and I'm about to kiss her once again but she holds me back with her hands against my chest “Now go though”

“Uh is that so?” I try and get my kiss but she pushes me harder away.

“Hurry up”

“I'm going, I'm going. So bossy...” I let go of her and leave the kitchen, only to show up on the doorway a second later, only for a moment “I like it”

It takes me a while to find the boots, I mean, the boot, Angie's brown one, cause it rolled down the sidewalk under a parked car. When I find it, I instinctively look up, as if I'm expecting to see her still there, at the window, with her colorful hair fluttering in the night breeze. But she's not there and I immediately go back inside. And during the whole way, this time using the elevator, I try and figure out the connection between wine and boot and the dynamics that brought them both out of the window. I walk up to the apartment and Sade is still singing.

“Thank you, Eddie. Do you want some?” I turn around the corner in the hallway and Angie's on the doorway with a bowl of chips in her hands and she holds it out to me as I get closer.

I want you I'd tell her but I just give her the boot and take the bowl and bury my hand in it.

“Anytime” I watch her quickly walking away into her room, quickly walking on her naked legs... GET IT TOGETHER MAN, YOU'RE SWEATING.

“Why are you standing there like that? Come in” Angie comes back and I'm still here at the door eating chips.

“I was waiting for you” I shrug and follow the flower path and her steps once again into the living room.

“So?” she asks when we're in front of the couch and I put the bowl of chips down on the small wooden table, since I believe we're about to sit down. Yet she keeps standing and smiles at me, with the tip of her canine popping up and diggin into her lower lip for a second as usual.

“So?” I repeat getting closer till my face is inches from hers, but without hugging her or kissing her, as if there's a game, a challenge between us, a challenge I'll surely fail.

“The bunch of questions... “ she looks down and, tugging the hem of her t-shirt down, she quickly takes a seat and I'm sure she's blushing even though she's not looking at me.

“Ok... Sade?” I point at the record player and sit down beside her, as I take off my jacket and throw it on the other couch.

“Hahaha of all this mess, the strangest thing to you is Sade's record?”

“No. But it's the first thing I thought of now”

“Don't you like it? It's... it's a good album” she turns towards me and subtly closes the distance between us on the couch at the same time.

“She's very good, it's just I didn't think you liked her. Can I ask the second question?”

“Sure”

“What the hell were you doing at the window with a bottle and a boot?” Angie's grin widens again.

“I was trying to open the wine bottle” she shrugs as if this is the most obvious explanation.

“By kicking it?”

“Hahaha more or less. My dad taught me”

“I sense a memorable anecdote is coming, I'm all ears”

Angie tells me about that time when she went on a camping trip with her parents to Lake Payette, her father's idea to celebrate his and his wife's birthdays, that I guess must be very close. On night one Ray pulled out a bottle of wine he had brought for the occasion but realized he forgot the corkscrew. He pounced on the cork with a knife but it seemed he couldn't open the bottle. Janis wanted to postpone the toast to the following evening, after going to the nearby shop and buying the bottle opener. There was no way to convince Ray though. So Angie's dad, as nothing happened, took off his boot in front of them, stuck the fuckin' bottle in it and, without saying a word, walked clumsily on a single boot up to the closest ponderosa pine and started slamming the bottle, protected by his shoe, against the trunk.

“You know, the pressure inside the bottle pushes the cork out, until you can grab it and take it off with your hands. My mom and I were doubled over in laughter” as she tells the story, Angie crosses her legs and moves on the couch and this makes her shirt go up little by little. I notice that and feel kind of an asshole.

“But it worked”

“And that was the first time I tasted wine: I was 11. It was good, although it had been shaken for 15 minutes”

“This means you got no corkscrew here at home?”

“Yeah... I mean, actually we had one, but I can't find it anymore. I guess someone took it at my birthday party or Matt or Chris borrowed it and haven't returned it yet. Sure it didn't seem wise to go there and ask them now, you know...” yes, I know, you didn't ask them because they'd have asked questions you don't wanna answer, at least by now.

“And you decided to use the Pacifico technique”

“And since I don't have any tree here, the only way to do it was beating the bottle against the wall. But I didn't want to risk getting the kitchen dirty so...”

“Hehe so you figured you'd do it out of the window?” I adore this woman.

“Yep. And it was working fine, until a certain someone scared me and made me drop everything. And I made a mess” she gives me a playful nasty look and scoots away from me.

“You're right, it's all my fault.” I scoot over on the couch to sit back close to her “But I know how to make you forgive me” ok, more than close basically glued to her.

“How?” she looks up at me amused, basically batting her eyelids against mine.

“Opening the other bottle” I stand up out of the blue and I leave her there, maybe a little disappointed? I go into the kitchen, take the bottle and open the window.

“With the Pacifico technique?” she asks as she shows up at the kitchen door.

“Nuh, with the Vedder one” I peer outside, remove the wrapper, pull out my lighter and start heating the end of the bottle neck with the flame.

“Isn't this dangerous?” I feel one arm circling my hip and for a minute there the red wine bottle was about to end the same way as Angie's one.

“No, I did it so many times” I answer as I rotate the bottle.

“Hey, it's coming out!” Angie exclaims behind my back while the cork starts moving.

At that point I tilt the bottle slightly as to prevent the cork from exploding like a bullet inside the apartment or into somebody else's window. Finally the corks pops out and falls into the street, where it looks like he doesn't hit anyone. Wine is safe too.

“See! Hot air expands inside the bottle and pushes the cork.” I close the window and triumphantly show the uncorked bottle to Angie, who arches her eyebrow at me “What? I can do science too, you know”

“So you also know you could have caused an explosion and get hurt?” she rolls her eyes and by the way is still hugging me.

“Not if you know how to do it and and to be careful. So, am I forgiven?” I ask, raising the bottle at her as if it was a toast.

“Sure!” she chuckles and looks at me in silence for a while. And I'm expecting a kiss but instead, she lets go of me and exits the kitchen, but not before addressing me again “Let's go taste you boiled wine”

The wine is not boiled at all and it's not bad. Angie and I are at the second round and, as I'm stuffing my face with chips and sandwiches, I realize it's getting hot in here. I mean, I can't be this heated for two glasses of wine. And neither for the half nakedness of Angie. Even though... And this is the moment I figure out my usually chilly girlfriend is dressed only in a t-shirt and I can't hear her teeth chatter for the cold, so there must be something going on here.

“My bunch of questions aren't over anyway...” I say and Angie makes herself comfortable on the couch, half laid and leaning on the armrest.

“Shoot”

“It's fucking hot in here, isn't it?” I ask as I take off my flannel and she starts laughing uncomfortably and, as she tries to sit up, her feet get closer, touch my legs and push against me a little to leverage. But I don't move an inch.

“Hahaha yeah, you're right... as you can see, tonight's really the perfect night: just one disaster after another”

“Why? What happened?” I throw the shirt there were my jacket is.

“I don't know, it must... the heating system must be broken, and that's not unusual. The new thing is... this time, I don't know... they kind of broke the other way round and it's been heating non stop at full power since this afternoon”

“Do you want me to check your radiators?”

“No point trying, it's not just here, the whole building is burning basically”

“Do you want me to go down and check the boiler room?”

“NO!” Angie basically kicks me, then regains her composure “Err no, no worries. And then, I mean, the apartment manager is the one who's supposes to take care of this stuff and call technicians, that's what he's paid for! He'll do the work”

“Ok”

“And what if you can't solve the problem and maybe no one can and they blame you because you put your hand in there...”

“Alright”

“And by the way, at least it's not freezing, for a change”

“Well, yeah, still better than freezing but...”

“I know. Shitty building. Anyway, now you know the... ehm, you know why I'm dressed like... this” Angie goes on and pulls down her t-shirt again to cover her thighs.

“I wouldn't call it a disaster then” I smirk and rub the back of my hand softly against her leg, from her ankle to her knee. She stares at me in the eyes and for a moment I'm sure she's about to throw herself over me and kiss me, but I'm wrong again.

“So? Which movie do we watch first? Mine or yours?” she asks out of the blue.

“You decide” actually I even forgot about the movies, the heat, the wine, about where we are and maybe what year we are as well.

“No, come on, you tell me” my hand is still going up and down.

“It's the same for me, Angie”

“Same for me too”

“You're the host, you choose”

“You're my guest, so it's up to you” of course, as always: it's up to me.

“Uhm... alright! Let's watch yours first then”

“Ok! The tape is there under the tv, would you put it on? I'll get some water” in a fraction of a second Angie sneaks away into the kitchen and I find myself alone. I turn off the stereo then crawl in front of the tv to get the Goodfellas tape and as I do I think about one thing. Well, actually two. One worse than the other. The first thing is that I'd rather have gone to get the water instead of Angie, so I could come back here and see her on hands and knees as she fumbles with the videorecorder, and that it'd have made for a very nice view. My second thought is that the tv looked much better in Angie's room and it'd have been much more enjoyable to watch it with her from her bed.

Disgusting thoughts indeed.

“Did you find it?” Angie's question startles me as if I was caught red handed doing something illicit.

“Yep” I press Play, stand up and try to get back on the couch before her. I do and sit right in the middle of it. So she won't be able to sit far from me. I gloat for my smar idea.

“If you want to be more comfortable, just lay down. I'm gonna sit there. Hehe we have one couch each if we want to” is Angie even aware of her endless power? The power to leave me totally speechless with such statements?

“Actually... I don't want to”

“Are you sure?” well, I don't know... WHAT DO YOU THINK?

“Very sure, I don't want a whole couch for me, I wanna share it with you” I hold my arms out and grab her by her waist, pulling her gently towards me until I finally take her back on this couch. And I hold her and kiss her and touch her, pushing her delicately towards the armrest on her side. And at some point I feel her hand moving right under my body. I think I know what she's about to do and I feel euphoric all of a sudden. But Angie is able to surprise me again, because even if I don't see her doing it, I can clearly feel her gesture of grasping at the hem of her t-shirt and pulling it down for the umpteenth time. I internally laugh at my stupid X-rated delusions, although on the other hand I'm sorry Angie doesn't feel comfortable with me yet. I don't wanna hurry, really, I'd just like to know what the problem is. I give her one last peck on her lips and back away so we can both sit up properly.

“Ok. Let's fastforward all the commercials and advisories. Where's the remote? Oh there it is!” Angie, the one who was about to abandon me all by myself on this couch, the one who was coy and bashful during my approach like two minutes ago, it's the same girl that basically climbs on me to jump over on the opposite side and stretch out to take the remote on the other armrest. And then does the same thing backwards to get back to her place. And I'm not complaining at all.

We're almost at the end of my movie and this is the situation: we finished the wine I don't even remember when, as for food only a few snacks and two small chocolate cakes are left; I'm in my t-shirt and boxers because it's really hot, although we opened the window in the living room; Angie's smoking a cigarette, resting on the couch with her legs over mine and I've been genty stroking them for literal HOURS, something that contributes in heating the atmosphere even more. And I also feel kind of guilty, because Harold has just rushed to the hospital with Maude and I already know what's about to happen and the ending breaks my heart every time... and I'm here, basking in the softness and smoothness of Angie's skin under my fingers.

“It's so sad. But also beautiful at the same time” she remarks during the credits.

“Yeah. You really haven't seen it before?”

“Never. And now I see why you like it”

“Hehe right, Cat Stevens has something to do with it” I reply since I think she's referring to the soundtrack.

“Uhm yeah but that's not what I meant. What I wanted to say is that... well, this movie is like you” she takes one long last hit of smoke, then puts out her cigarette in the ashtray she placed on the floor. And she's amazing. Not because she's smoking but... I know it's not nice to say, and it's also unhealthy, a bad bad habit, but... there are times, particular times in which, maybe fuelled by excessive domestic heating and subsequent nudity, I see something extremely sexy in a woman who's smoking.

“Absurd?”

“Absurd, eccentric, thoughtful, bitter and sweet...” Angie slowly counts the adjectives on her fingertips and I can't say she didn't get them right. This means she knows there's something bitter, and dark inside me. Maybe that's why she doesn't trust me completely yet.

“Eccentric uh?” a devilish grin appears on my face.

“Oh well...”

“Said the girl who tried to open a bottle with a shoe outside the window”

“Ok this is gonna be another of those recurring jokes you're gonna use to take the piss out of me for the rest of my life, isn't it?”

“Yes... after all, I can't make fun of you for your nights out with Meg to pick up guys anymore, I have to find a substitute”

“Really? And why?” she adjust herself better on the couch to sit up and for a minute I'm afraid I'll lose touch with her legs, but she still keeps them over mine.

“Because you're not having those anymore” I hold her by the hips as she puts her hands on my shoulders.

“Are you sure?”

“You don't need to”

“So can I hang up my infallible pick up techniques now?”

“Sure, now that you picked me up”

“How I made it is still unknown...”

“With your infallible pick up techniques, of course”

“That are? Not doing absolutely anything?” as if she needed to do something to have me fall for her. I lay down on the couch and pull her with me.

“Being yourself and not doing absolutely anything, the best way”

“If you say so...” she mutters and she tries to sit back up but I hold her tight and prevent her from sneaking away. At this point, also not to slip and fall off the couch, she has to more or less straddle me.

“It worked with me, can't you see that?” I grab her as she tries to wriggle free, I hold her tighter and slip my hand under her t-shirt, to caress her back.

“Eddie! Come on, let me sit up...”

“Why?”

“Because I'm hurting you...”

“Shut up!”

“It's true and you know it”

“You can't crush me, I can feel you got all the weight on your knees and arms”

“Because I wanna spare you asphyxiation?”

“Cut.The.Crap.” I decide I'm gonna do this the hard way and my hand sneaks across her back towards her armpit so I can tickle her, but she gives up long before I get there. Mental note: Angie is very ticklish “Oh, that's better!”

“Hahaha stop it!”

“Much better” I repeat when we find ourselves basically nose to nose and then I stop torturing her, close my eyes and breathe in silence with her for five minutes, I think, waiting for something... that never comes. Angie removes her hands from my hair, where she had casually buried them in the heat of the moment. Then she holds on to the pillows, pulls herself up and backs away from me.

“I'll turn off the tv” Angie stretches out her hand to get the remote from the table where I put, then sits back down at my feet. I take a deep breath and sit up too.

“I'd better go” I'm about to stand up but Angie, with a quick move, grabs me by the arm and pulls me back down on the couch.

“WHERE ARE YOU GOING?”

“Home, so I'll let you sleep” I pinch her cheek and try to stand up again but Angie doesn't let me.

“But I don't wanna sleep! Well, I mean... you can sleep with me, you know, you can crash at my place”

“Even tonight?”

“Yes, why? Don't you want to?” Angie's torturing the hemline of her t-shirt again and if she tugs at it some more, it'll become a tunic.

“Sure I want to. I thought that it may be a problem”

“A problem about what?”

“I don't know, because of Meg?”

“Meg won't be here, she's sleeping over at her friend's”

“But she'll be back tomorrow morning, right? What if she sees me again? What will she think?” I'm saying it for her, not for me. If she sees me and does the math, I'll be nothing but happy.

“What will she think? Nothing. Anyway, I already told her”

“You told her?” I ask, suddenly interested and full of hope. Did she really tell someone we're a couple?

“Yeah, I told her you'd come over tonight. And that maybe you'd sleep here” hope destroyed in ten seconds. Maybe.

“And what did she say?”

“She said ok” Angie shrugs and takes the last two cakes left from the table, biting on one and handing me the other one.

“Ok? Only ok?” I take a bite too.

“Sure, what were you expecting?”

“Nothing. But... I think Meg knows then”

“Sure she knows, I've just told you! Why all these problems all of a sudden?”

“No, I mean she knows... about us...” a second bite and no more cake.

“NO! I... I didn't tell her anything”

“Angie... it's the 4th time we sleep together in a week, I don't think you need to tell her. If she's not stupid, she'll understand by herself.

“She knows we sleep together but she doesn't know... what... ehm... what we do” Angie eats the rest of her chocholate cake and pours herself half a glass of water to swallow it better.

“She can assume it, I guess” seriously, Meg's assumptions surely go well beyond what actually happens between Angie and I in reality.

“Meg has no trouble to say what she thinks: if she had suspects, she'd have openly told me”

“You should do it”

“What?”

“Openly tell her, about us”

“WHAT? WHY?” why the hell is she so scared?

“'Cause she's a friend to you and you have to start somewhere, don't you?”

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

“Listen, we already talked about it, do you wanna keep it secret? Ok, I'm in. But you could take things gradually, with no big collective announcements, just by telling it to one single person. And why not your best friend?”

“I don't know, maybe because she's totally incapable of keeping a secret?” Angie looks at me as if I was stupid and rolls her eyes.

“Well, that's so much better, isn't it. We only need to tell Meg, then she'll get the word out for us” I try and hug her and she slaps my chest in response.

“Fuck you, Eddie”

“Let's go to bed?”

“Mmm... ok”

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