#I made a new save with a friend and were still at like late spring year 1

[sanguchito-farm]

Save me Sam_Winter.png

[itskattkm]

The air in my lungs

Chapter 3

Cairo Sweet x Fem Reader

Summary: A stroke of fate changes you and leads you into the arms of Cairo Sweet. Will she be your downfall or save you?

Warnings: 18+, Grief, Injuries, Scars, Car accident, Smoking, Trauma, anxiety, sexual content, student x teacher mentioned, harm, blackmailing, bad grammar

A/N: Based and inspired by Millers Girl. Mr. Miller himself isn’t really present but will be mentioned. Hope you guys enjoy.

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Cairo didn’t saw you for the rest of the day. When she was home in her big mansion near the woods. Surrounded by big trees and nature it self she was getting crazy with herself. Her thoughts kept running back to you. Everytime Cairo tried to write, she ended up writing about you. The way you looked, the way you made her feel, the way she wanted to be touched by you, the way she wanted to touch you and fix you. Her heart was pounding hard against her chest when she imagined what It would feel like to be touched by you. The way you moved her cigarette so smoothly between you fingers. Fingers she wanted to feel on her skin, feel on places she never really cared about before. She began to hear her own heartbeat. Getting lost in the idea of you touching her in those almost unholy places. Feeling you taking off her laced slip slowly just to tease her. Your lips touching her neck making her gasp for air she almost forgot how to breathe.

Suddenly there was a ring. “Winnie” sighed Cairo when she was brought back by her friend from her daydream. Cairo made immediately her way down to the entry. It was already pretty late when Winnie decided to come over, you expected her after school but Winnie seemed to have different plans. Anyways she was here now and both of them were lying on Cairos big bed, smoking together while checking your social media accounts.

They wanted to see if they could find the reason why you changed over the summer and why you were acting so strange towards Cairo today. Winnie was really good at stalking, so she was basically guiding Cairo towards what she should be looking for. Cairo couldn’t wait to find out what y/n was hiding and why, as long as she was okay of course. They both knew that y/n was someone who kept things pretty private. She liked keeping things for herself and used to like staying in the shadows. That’s what made her so interesting to Cairo. It was like y/n had diffrent personalities.

“So… as the pro I am. I found out why y/n turned hot… bold… and acted so weird today and why she got that scars on her back” said Winnie with a devilish smile.

“Why? Please tell me, Winnie.” Cairo said, trying to stay optimistic. She was already so curious about the scars you had, and wanted to know why you acted so different that day. She really hoped you didn’t get hurt or anything but let’s be honest… when someone had scars it meant that they had been hurted so... Cairo just wanted you to be okay, first and foremost. But she also wanted to know the reason for your sudden change today.

“As I assumed something happened at the end of spring…She was in a pretty bad car accident with her family. Her mom died and y/n barely survived. Her dad’s still alive but… well… I mean they still are grieving”

Winnie showed Cairo then pictures of the accident. It was pictures of a car in the middle of a river. When they managed to get the car out Cairo could she how destroyed the front was. It was a wonder that her dad managed to survive thought Cairo.

Winnie kept telling the story “Seemed like it was also in the news. Some drunk asshole was driving on the other side of the road. Her father tried to avoid the car but they crashed through the bridge and fell down into the river.” Cairo was stunned to hear that. She couldn’t believe what Winnie had just said. Your story suddenly seemed a bit harder to talk about then she could have imagined. Cairo was hurt about what she had heard, but still wanted to know more. “And what about the scars?” Cairo asked, her tone suddenly sounding more serious, but she didn’t know if that was because she was shocked or because she was hurting on your behalf.

“Oh wait… I wasn’t right. While her dad tried to avoid the other car… the car immediately crashed into the side she and her mom had been sitting in. The car turned and then they crashed through the bridge and fell into the river… trapped in the car under the water” said Winnie while checking some old news reports online.

Then it hit Cairo like a truck and she said quite “I guess that’s why she panicked in swim class. It was because of the incident Winnie”.

“Fuck…” Cairo muttered in shock. She had no idea you had gone through something so horrible. Her heart dropped again. She couldn’t believe what she heard. And it made more sense now that you were so cold towards her today. You just wanted to forget what happened during swimming class. Now your scars made more sense to Cairo. You had been through a tragic event… you needed some time. Cairo felt a little bad, as she couldn’t help to want to approach you about her feelings for you. But she knew she couldn’t just ignore something like this. This wasn’t just a flirt… you were human. You were hurt pretty bad. This was pretty bad.

“Not many people know about it. But her close friends said she changed much after the accident. I mean if I had almost died? I would also care less about people thoughts and be bolder… enjoy life…” said Winnie and sighed. “I guess that’s what she’s doing. She’s trying to live the life she didn’t had for so many years. And I guess the trauma of the accident also made her care less about some things…” Cairo said, a bit sad that you might have changed because of the accident. “But I think I’m also glad she’s alive. And I’m happy that the way she acted today hasn’t been my fault. The accident kinda explains it all… It makes me feel a bit better as well.”

Winnie grinned wide “So don’t worry about her being so mean to you. It was a bad timing… I’m sure tomorrow you both will go back to the hot flirting and soon you’ll have her tongue between your legs.”

Cairo gasped and punched Winnie with a pillow but she had to admit that this made her sweat for a sec. Winnie laughed and Cairo smiled at her a bit. It had all made sense now, and she was also glad that Winnie was reassuring her that it wasn’t her fault. You had just been through a lot. Nothing was about Cairo, and you just needed space today. “Thanks Winnie. I feel a lot better now. I should still try not to do anything that might make things more difficult, but it’s a huge relief that y/n is just handling the accident badly.”

“What did the scars look like? Did they make her even hotter? Like a bad ass villain?” asked Winnie curious and laid down on her stomach while watching Cairo. “You think scars make her EVEN hotter?” Cairo asked, smiling at Winnie. Winnie was so funny and playful. And she didn’t mind her questions at all, that’s just how she was. “I honestly think the scars make her look badass, that’s for sure.” Cairo replied, thinking about how tough you must be to have scars from an accident like that. And to be so young at the same time. “But the hotness has gotta be her confidence, her eyes, her lips. Just everything really.”

Winnie grinned wider and nudged Cairo slightly “oh you got that shine in your eyes… I can see the things on your mind… it’s making me pretty hot I can tell” she sighed and moved closer to Cairo and looked at her with serious eyes “Damn girl you need to get that girl in bed and tell me everything afterwards… Just imagine scratching her back with those scars” she said and almost whined while saying this, wich made Cairo blush pretty hard. “Don’t tempt me…” Cairo said, jokingly. She couldn’t hide her attraction to you. And she wasn’t sure y/n didn’t feel anything for her either. At times it felt like she did. But other times she was distant. “When it comes to this girl, I don’t think I’ll be able to resist any longer.” Cairo sighed, thinking about you. You looked so good today, and the scars just added to that the more she thought about it. She felt a hard pulsing between her legs and sighed quietly, thinking about how she would kiss every scar on your body while adding a few more with her nails while you would give her the best pleasure she could ever imagine.

“Good” said Winnie proud… “my bestie is learning from me”

“You know…” Cairo said, looking towards Winnie.” Y/n is such an attractive girl, and I think I will talk to her later.” She paused. “When I do, I think I’ll make a move on her.” Winnie looked both shocked and excited, her eyes opening wide when she heard Cairo’s confession.

“Later? Like? In the middle of the night? Today? No… after that awful day for her better not. Depends… how did you planned to approach her?” She asked and looked at Cairo with a tilted head.

“Well, maybe tomorrow then. But yes, I’ll make a move on her.” Cairo said, staring right back at Winnie as she spoke. She had thought about what she was going to say to you. And she knew exactly how she was going to act. “As for how?” She paused for a moment. “I guess I’ll just be myself. Y/n seems to like that.” She smiled a bit over at Winnie. Winnie giggled and whispered into Cairos ear “Keep doing that smoking thing… I think that’s your and y/n thing now… and maybe you can use that. To get close… and turn the tables and surprise her. Don’t let her win that easy” said Winnie while looking devilish at Cairo.

“Yeah, it probably is our thing now. Maybe I should use it to get close to y/n.” Cairo said excitedly. She was really starting to make a plan now. She wanted to get to you and make a move on you. She was so attracted to you, and really wanted to be with you. “But you mean surprise her in what way?” She asked, slightly confused. “You mean surprising her by making a move on her without her expecting it?” She asked, almost smiling. “By kissing her out of nowhere like she did with you?! God when you told me that story I was getting so turned on. You were so mean to her and what did she do?

Steal your cigarette took a puff, destroyed it, grabbed your chin and kissed you hard to release the smoke in your mouth and saying

Stop Smoking around me? Ugh… hot!” sighed Winnie and looked dreamy at the ceiling “I would have probably took of my slip immediately and said ‘take me’” said Winnie half joking cause Cairo knew Winnie would do such things.

“Yeah I could do that.” Cairo nodded. She thought about exactly how y/n had surprised her before. And it was so unexpected, but so so hot. “But I also want to make a move like that in a more romantic way. One that she can’t resist, like she did with me.” She paused. “I still want to surprise her, but at the same time make her feel like she can’t say no.”

“That wasn’t romantic my dear friend… that was seducing…” explained Winnie and rolled her eyes at Cairos innocent hint. She may was a pro in writing the baddest smut ever but y/n was making Cairo really go so weak. Cairo smirked. “Is there a difference?” She asked, wondering if she was making a huge mistake. “Because to me, that was romantic. I was so surprised, but I felt so warm when y/n kissed me.” Maybe Winnie was right, but Cairo wanted to believe that you just liked her, or just liked to act that way to mess with her. Or maybe you liked Cairo just for her body. She didn’t know, but she wanted to find out. “Depends” said Winnie with a dirty grin “Did you feel hot between your legs or in your chest?”.

“Both. But honestly, my whole body just felt good. It was the whole feeling.” Cairo replied, not knowing what to believe anymore. “I don’t know if I can distinguish between romantic and seducing. They felt the same to me. But maybe I can, since you’re probably right. Y/n was just flirting, and not acting romantic.” That was at least what she wanted to believe, or she would have to be completely honest with herself and realize that she liked you for more than just your looks or your body. And she wasn’t ready for that.

“Just go for it and have your fun Cairo” said Winnie. “I will.” Cairo said, smiling at Winnie. “You know, I feel like y/n is going to turn me down. But it’s like there’s this part of me telling me to go for it anyway. As if something tells me that y/n won’t be able to say no. As if she would accept… Maybe I could use the cigarette thing to seduce her. Or like… I don’t know. I guess I know what to do.” Cairo felt like she had suddenly found out exactly how she wanted to go about this.

“We both know you have the power to seduce and that even through writing. You also ‘accidentally’ seduced our old teacher with your story’s. If I need to remeber you of that. You can have everyone you want Cairo” said Winnie with a luring voice. Cairo smiled at Winnie. “True. Writing is my thing. And I guess seducing is too…” she mumbled. “But is y/n seducible?” She asked, suddenly feeling unsure again. What if y/n wasn’t seducible at all. Maybe that wasn’t what she wanted. “Or is it just that y/n thinks I’m someone who can’t go after her?” Cairo wondered. Y/n was so hard to read it was hard to say what she wanted. But she hoped that she wanted her…

“In my opinion, After knowing her backstory now. She deserves to be seduced and get a good fuck” said Winnie like it was nothing.

Cairo nodded slowly. She looked over at Winnie and smiled. “Then I guess I’ll go for it.” She said, determined to win over y/n. She just hoped her plan would work. And that y/n was seducible. She was scared about the rejection she could get, and scared to find out your feelings. But it was the only way to find out. And she wanted to know what you really thought.

Cairo sighed. She couldn’t believe she was breaking her mind about someone for so long. That wasn’t her at all. You did something to her and Cairo wasn’t sure if she liked it.

[artiststarme]

Steve is Afraid of Hospitals

Years of dealing with the Upside Down had taken a psychological toll on the entire Party. From nightmares to newly-developed phobias, no one escaped their yearly festivities unscathed. Steve was not an exception. Since his and Robin’s capture and subsequent torture by the Russians underneath Starcourt, he’d been terrified of drugs, needles, doctors, and everything else relating to the medical field. Any time he thought of having to go to the doctor, he could feel the torturer ripping his nails off with the plier. Whenever he tried to enter the ER, he felt the painful sting of the needle in his neck enough to make him dizzy. And imagining getting a shot? Well, that was enough to keep Steve away from even driving past the hospital out of fear alone. 

The closest he’d been to the white coats since the happenings underneath Starcourt was when he’d carried Eddie’s bleeding body into the ER for treatment. Even then, he hadn’t stuck around. He’d stayed just long enough to threaten the nursing staff to try their best and tell them that Eddie wasn’t a murderer. Steve waited until the doctors promised to do all that they could before he hurriedly made his way outside to escape the tightness in his chest. He waited briefly in the parking lot for Robin or Dustin or Nancy to follow him but he soon realized that they were much too busy dealing with Eddie and Max to worry about him. 

And so, he started the long trek back to his house. He knew deep down that he should’ve gotten his sides looked at, maybe even the abrasions on his neck. Irrationally though, Steve couldn’t stomach the thought of any doctors poking and prodding at him. Even thinking about being in the same room as a doctor with access to drugs and syringes caused his heart to palpitate. His reaction to everything made it worse. Why couldn’t he just get over his aversion to hospitals? Robin wasn’t afraid of supporting their injured friends around doctors. She had been stabbed in the neck with the same type of needle as he had and she had no problem being around needles now. And she could still drink the occasional beer, feel the relief of alcohol, without delving into a panic attack over loss of control. 

But Steve was weak. When he had a problem, instead of solving it, he avoided it. Even when his new friend and one of his kids was in the hospital fighting for their lives. And he hated himself for it. 

It took him a little over an hour to walk back to his house. The whole way there, the sides of his torso throbbed and his head ached. He could feel blood soaking through the dirty bandages and he could feel Eddie’s blood sticking to his skin too. He just wanted to take a shower and forget what they had all been through over Spring Break. 

He scrubbed his body clean in the warmest shower his wounds would tolerate. He was in there long after the water had run cold just trying to peel the stain of Eddie’s blood from his skin. When he was done, he tried to bandage his wounds and clean them with antiseptic but staring into the pulverized flesh reminded him too much of how his face looked after the Russian torture. So, he slapped on some gauze and fell into his bed to get some sleep plagued by nightmares. 

~*~*~*~

He called Dustin at the hospital to check on Max and Eddie late the next morning. “Hey Henderson, how’re they?”

“Um, they gave Eddie a blood transfusion and a couple of skin grafts last night. They said that he would be fine but the police kicked us out of his room and have him cuffed to the bed. He almost died trying to save Hawkins and they’re still treating him like a criminal! Max is in a coma, the doctors don’t know if she’s going to wake up or if she’ll be the same when she does.” He paused for a moment. “You’d know if you were here. Where are you? You just disappeared last night. Where’d you go?”

“Dustin, I’m sorry. I just, I just really needed some time to myself last night. I’m happy to hear they’re doing well. I’ll talk to you later,” Steve went to hang up the phone when he heard him speak again. 

“Hey, since you’re calling to annoy me, you might as well annoy me in person. Can you give me a ride home today?” Dustin asked in a desperate voice barely disguised with snark. 

Steve sighed, he couldn’t let the kid down after everything he’d been through. “Sure, man. I’ll be there in 20 minutes, okay?”

“Yep, thanks Steve! I’ll see you then.” And then he hung up and left the Harrington house in silence once more. 

Steve was a little nervous and his palms were already starting to sweat. He was just picking Dustin up from the parking lot, it was fine. He wasn’t going to get poked by needles or drugged with unknown hallucinogens. No, he probably wasn’t even going to see any doctors! All he had to do was get Dustin, drop him off at home, and go back to his own house to lick his wounds in peace. Easy peasy. 

He continued his inner pep talk all the way to the hospital and only stopped once he saw Dustin waiting at the ER doors. His stomach dropped as soon as his car turned into the lot and his vision blurred for a moment. Oh shit, he didn’t know if he could do this. 

“Henderson! Get in the car, I’m not going to wait all day!” Yeah, that’ll trick him. Steve couldn’t let anyone witness his weaknesses. It was his job to protect the group at all costs. If they knew he was afraid of such a trivial thing, they’d never trust him again. 

Dustin just shook his head and huffed as he climbed into the now-parked car. “Jesus Christ Steve, have some patience. It wouldn’t kill you. Speaking of, how are your bites? I saw some of Eddie’s after they cleaned him up this morning and they looked brutal, man.”

He reached for Steve’s waist but he slapped his hand away. “Um, no. Take me to dinner first before trying to get me to strip. Jesus Christ, Henderson. Don’t be a perv.”

Dustin pulled his hand back, affronted. “What the hell, Steve. You look all sweaty and I can see blood soaking through your bandages. Did you get them looked at by a doctor before you left yesterday?”

He reached for the hem of Steve’s shirt again and Steve grabbed his wrist. “I’m serious, Henderson. It’s fine. Let’s just go.”

Henderson yanked his arm out of Steve’s grasp and went to grab the hem for a third time. Unfortunately for Steve, he miscalculated slightly and poked his pointy fingers directly into his wound. A white-hot flash of pain shot through Steve and he released a half gasp/half yelp of pain. He felt the sluggish bleeding of the bites start anew with the blunt intrusion through the bandages. 

Steve screwed his eyes shut in pain and let his head drop against the steering wheel. His horn sounded but his eyes remained closed and his breaths left his lips in pants. Dustin shot back in his seat and fumbled with the door handle. “Oh my god, Steve! I’m so sorry! I’ll go get a nurse to help you!”

He didn’t receive an answer from Steve who was still keeled over in his seat, barely conscious and reliving the pain of the bats digging into his flesh. He must’ve lost consciousness because the next thing he saw when he opened his eyes was a moving gurney and lots of people in scrubs and white coats. He jerked in his spot and started mumbling meaningless pleads.

“No, no, no. Let me leave. Please, let us go. I work at Scoops, please. Scoops!”

The doctors paid him no mind even as his limbs started to flail. They spoke over his panicked shrieks and one approached him with a syringe filled with clear liquid. 

Steve wasn’t going to go down without a fight, unlike last time. Last time, he had to bide his time to protect Robin. But now? Now he was alone. He didn’t have to take the torture lying down this time. So, when the doctor was within reach past all of the nurses and restrictive grasps, Steve punched the white coated man in the face.

“Shit, he broke my nose!” You’re damn right I did, evil Russian. Logically, Steve knew that he was in the Hawkins hospital. But he couldn’t focus on logic over the sheer panic that he was experiencing. 

“Restrain him, give him the sedative!”

“No, please, no! Let me go!”

And then he felt a sharp poke in his arm and the world went black once more. 

~*~*~*~

When he woke up again, he saw a dark room. What happened? He let out a loud groan and moved his hand to scrub at his face.

“Easy Harrington. If you keep moving, you’re going to pull your stitches.”

“My what?” Steve paused all movement and tried to force his eyes to acclimate to the darkness. “Where am I?”

“You’re in the hospital. Dude, you went home instead of getting your sides looked at and they got infected. Nice going. They were worried about sepsis for a while there but they think you’re probably in the clear now. You’ve been getting IV antibiotics.”

When he heard about the IV, his attention was immediately pulled to the pain in his hand and he gasped as he pulled out the needle. It clattered to the ground with little fanfare but Steve could still feel it poking his skin. 

“Did you just pull out the IV? You need that, Harrington. What the fuck?”

The person turned on the light and suddenly the room was illuminated. Steve turned his head to the neighboring bed to lock eyes with an unimpressed and rumpled Eddie Munson. “Eddie?”

“Yes, Harrington. I’ve been talking to you for the past five minutes and you didn’t recognize me? I’m offended.” 

Steve shook his head. He was in the hospital. Oh god, he had to get out of here. He tried to scooch out of bed but fell back in pain. 

“What’s going on, Harrington? You need to stay here. Lay back down, you’re safe. Steve, I see you trying to get up. You need to not do that.” Eddie tried to calm him down but it wasn’t working. 

After a few more failed attempts, Eddie pulled himself out of bed and stumbled to Steve’s. “Fuck man, I need you to stop moving. I’m pretty sure I pulled some stitches on my way over here and if we both need new stitches, the nurses will get the wrong idea. Hey, Steve! Talk to me.”

Steve’s vision was blurred with tears and he was pretty sure his heart was going to explode due to the pressure pressing down on his chest. “I can’t be here, man. I need to get out. I can’t breathe, I can’t think, and where the hell is Robin? Is she safe? Did the Russians get her? Where’s Dustin? I gave them his full name. Oh shit, what if they go after him now? Fuck, I have to go.”

Eddie pushed his arms onto the bed and leaned his face close to Steve’s. “Steve, are you afraid of hospitals?”

Steve had told him a little bit about their time with the Russians and he guesses that Eddie made the connection. “I just, I can’t be here Eddie. What if they come after me again? I can’t lose control like that again. The drugs? I can’t do it again, man.”

“Hey, hey, hey. Stevie, I’ll protect you. And as soon as you can be discharged without dropping dead in your escape, we can leave. Alright? Move over.” Eddie comforted him. 

“What-” Steve tried to ask but Eddie cut him off. 

“Look man, you’re afraid of hospitals and I’m afraid of being alone. Move over so we can share a bed and not be scared together. Okay?”

Steve looked at him. It really was harder to be afraid with Eddie practically on top of him. And they had been through a lot together. So, Steve nodded and made some room for Eddie. There was hardly enough room for the two of them but they managed. And when the panic started to ebb away and his eyes started to close, Steve swears he felt Eddie press a small kiss to his hairline. 

He was still afraid of hospitals, doctors, drugs, and needles. But from then on, Eddie was there to distract him and make everything just a little better. And eventually, the fear stopped being so horrific and became just a mild nuisance as long as he had Eddie by his side.

@nburkhardt @doubleb11 @zerokrox-blog @carlyv @i-less-than-three-you @newtstabber @ghosttotheparty

The long awaited medical phobia fic @ghosttotheparty. I hope you like it!

[mizusnose]

Lay your hands on me

Part One

Mizu x Akemi

3.5k words

tags: Modern AU, Questioning Sexuality Akemi, Lesbian Mizu, Making Out, Smoking, Lesbian Porn, Sexual Tension, Mean Mizu, Hometown Trauma

Summary: Akemi experiences post-grad loneliness (and horniness) and starts questioning her sexuality. She goes to a local bar in her hometown to fix it. Mizu helps her out with her dilemma.

A/N: I just think it would be neat for Akemi to start questioning her sexuality while she’s back in her hometown. More specially her attraction towards hot butches 🥰

Post-grad life was treating Akemi pretty well. Granted, it had only been a week since she had graduated, the soft pane of her childhood window awash with snow and dirt from the wind. Her parents hadn’t turned her room into an office, workout room, or storage like most of her other friend’s parents had done. Instead, she got to look at all the k-pop posters she had hung up in her high school era. Splattered polaroids when that was a thing, marked by pink sparkly sharpie and stickers too cute and too childish for her now. The whisper of her childhood frozen and unfettered by time.

She’d fall asleep amongst the mountains of unpacked clothes and wake well into the day, drowsy and sticky from the space heater. Deciding to relax and rot only lasted a few days before her life started picking back up without her.

She had to get paperwork done for her job that would start at the tail end of January. Some local newspaper position that sounded exactly right on paper in every way. She didn’t want to talk about how long she took to accept her offer when it popped up in her email five whole days after graduation.

Her parents would scold her for taking showers daily, especially if she wasn’t going anywhere so she was left to rot in her pajamas bottoms since she got back home. The only real thing changing was her shirts and whether or not she decided to wear a bra that day—which was usually a no go.

She wondered if this is what post-grad life was really supposed to be. Late mornings and reheated coffee and pajama bottoms. Akemi didn’t want to think about how others her age were probably out with their friends, family, or significant others for the holiday break. All of her friends were still at university or had moved away. While her hometown friends were moms, engaged, or no longer in contact.

The glow-in-the-dark stars that shone a deep muted green for minutes after she turned off her light was her only company on cold nights. Her longtime business major boyfriend Taigen had broken up with her before he graduated in the spring six months ago. Something about moving to New York and making it big. Not like he was gonna be interning under his fathers company that already made millions.

Although, Akemi supposed she wasn’t too different from Taigen in that respect. Both her parents were realtors that ruled their hometown. It’s what paid Akemi’s way through undergrad. It’s what she was expecting to pay for her masters.

After all, she wasn’t staying here for long. The plan was always a gap year to start saving before going out into the world and conquering it, or whatever it was that was advertised most these days. This would be temporary.

But then again, a degree in English was never really a great option was it? Or at least, that’s what her parents would say when they thought she wasn’t around. To each other in the pantry that meets the lip of the kitchen. Or at their hosted neighborhood dinner parties, whispering and shaking their heads with other parents. It wasn’t a lifestyle choice they were proud of.

The fact that she had hauled all of her stuff from college back home was something that only proved their point further. Akemi felt like a child who wasn’t stopped when her imagination got too big, and now she was dealing with the consequences.

Feeling lonely and horny on top of it all felt like the icing on top. Her collection of dildos and vibrators tucked away at the bottom of her underwear drawer seemed crude and way too loud in her parents house. She would watch porn and work too long and too hard to orgasm. Taigen always used to marvel at how wet she would get. Now though, Akemi found herself reaching for lube every time she wanted to masturbate. It felt like an important part of her unraveling. A key turning point.

The first time that Akemi got off to lesbian porn, she felt guilt in a way. She’d watched it before back in the beginning parts of college when everyone was experimenting. Akemi herself had kissed a girl at her first house party at eighteen years old. However, this time felt different. She barely got halfway through the cringey teacher and student plot before Akemi had to shove her pajamas down and rub one off mean and messy. No lube required.

The second time it happened, Akemi used a dildo and was more prepared for the hunger that bloomed inside her gut. It was like a forest fire the way the desire burned into her. A kick to her gut and a shove to her clit and she was gone.

She didn’t understand. Taigen had always fucked her the way she wanted—slow and soft and with whispers and cuddles afterwards. It was fine. It was sex.

This was something entirely different. One that Akemi felt was important to note. She’d never fucked a girl. Never been fucked by one either. Her very limited experience of women started and ended with the porn she was starting to rely on to get off.

She texted her friends about it. Got a flurry of responses that ended up with Akemi self-reflecting and asking herself what she wanted.

It wasn’t an easy decision. She told her girlfriends as much. They suggested a night on the town, and Akemi figured why not? It had been ages since she had gone out. Been even longer since she had gone out in her hometown.

So that’s how she finds herself in a bar that doubles as a sports spot during the day. Billiard tables line the entryway and take up most of the place where groups of men and women alike play. It’s a Saturday night and a bit busy for a small town. The bartop is a long expanse of wood that juts out at a corner and extends to the other end of the room in an L shape. It’s a small place. One room with a connected outside patio with stringed lights.

The security guard has to double check her ID and even after that he eyes her closely as she enters. Akemi feels overdressed the second she gets in. Mostly everyone is wearing jeans. Akemi spots a tank top here and there, but flannels and long sleeves with a modest crop and cut are the majority. Every guy is a copy and paste of rough jackets and some snapbacks worse for wear.

She sets her jacket on a rack and wraps her arms around herself. The velvet of her shirt barely extends past her shoulders before it connects to lacy long sleeves that hide nothing. Her matching butterfly tattoos hover above her collarbones. The deep V-cut of the shirt leaves little to imagination, and the cropped cut accentuates her waist. The mini skirt and tights are just as out of place. Akemi feels herself turn hot and wonders if this is really the place she should’ve gone to.

But before she can second-guess herself, she swallows hard and marches to the bartop to order herself a drink. She’s already slightly tipsy from the wine she had with her dinner beforehand. Yet the liquid courage disperses once Akemi reaches the mess of bodies blocking the bartop. She squishes and politely tries to wiggle her way through but is met with less than friendly looks.

Just as she’s started to give up, a strong shoulder brushes up against her and nearly shoves her out of the way completely. Akemi feels the wine as she stumbles. Her face feels hot when she turns to see who it is, and feels it burn hotter when she realizes.

It’s a woman. Dressed in dark wash jeans and doc martens. She’s also wearing a long sleeve shirt. The waffle-knitted thermal pulls tight at her shoulders and back and neck. Her legs go on forever and Akemi watches allured as the woman moves with ease through the crowded bartop. Her profile is sharp and angular. The jut of her jaw, the peak of her cheekbones, the point of her chin. Her nose and soft curve of her forehead are the only distinguishing features that scream woman. Otherwise, the undercut and pulled back hair would’ve thrown Akemi off completely.

She watches as the woman gestures to order. Her two fingers long and pink from the cold drink in her hand. It’s half empty in her hold and Akemi wants.

It sits with her, then, how familiar the woman looks. It comes in flashes suddenly, the last couple of pornos she’s searched for and watched. Two women, bodies writhing, hot and panting. But beneath that, the difference between a taller, leaner and mean-looking woman and a smaller, bustier, whinier one. The crux of Akemi’s desire all along.

Akemi recalls the title of that first porn video she’d gotten off on. Hot Butch Professor Teaches Student A Lesson.

The woman waits for her drink and gets what she’s there for. As she leaves, Akemi feels that familiar punched-out feeling. The start of arousal. A spark catching.

She tracks the woman to the edge of the room. A billiard table observing the games going on. She’s as tall as the other men and her rounded tinted glasses reflect the low hanging lights. Akemi forces herself to look away. Her phone is dug out of her purse and she smashes a question into the group chat.

Guys, what’s a butch?

Her chat explodes instantly. Some gifs of eggplants, a picture of the blonde girl from atlantis, and one actual answer in a paragraph-length text.

She skims, looks at the woman, skims again, and nods, determined.

After managing to force herself through the crowd in a similar fashion to the woman, she gets a drink. Something fizzy and sweet. There’s a cherry floating on top.

Akemi wonders how this works. If there’s a method to flirting with other women. She shakes her head at that, there shouldn’t be. It’s attraction. Akemi knows attraction. Has been the center of it many times. So, with her resolve, she struts to the woman.

The height difference is apparent when Akemi meets the woman’s gaze. She’s wearing combat boots that have at least an inch on her usual height, yet she’s still looking up to grin at the woman.

“Hi.” Akemi says. She leans against the wall, tilting her head and showing off the stretch of skin on her neck.

“Hm.” The woman says. She regards Akemi carefully. Her eyes flicker to her matching butterfly tattoos. The action fizzles inside Akemi’s belly like the drink in her hand, “You are?” An eyebrow raises, and oh she’s mean, isn’t she?

“Akemi. And you are..?”

The woman meets her eyes again. This time over the tint of her glasses and Akemi is caught. Feels like a small creature fenced in by a predator. Like a fawn in a snare, bloody and vulnerable and raw.

“Mizu.” Her voice is deep and raspy. Akemi shudders at the sound. Mizu must notice because she takes a sip of her drink and works an ice cube into her mouth. It crushes against her canines. Akemi watches mesmerized, “You new to town?”

“Hah. No, back for the holidays.” Akemi lies. She figures it’s easier to have an escape, “That easy to tell?” Akemi jokes, getting closer and working with what Mizu seems to be giving.

“A bit.” Mizu drags her eyes down Akemi’s body as an answer. Akemi thinks she might combust.

“Yeah? How so?”

Mizu flicks her eyes around the bar and grins. She bends down to get to Akemi’s level. There’s a hand at her waist.

“Most girls wait until I’m tipsier to start flirting.” Akemi’s hip is gripped tightly by Mizu’s warm firm palm, “I can be mean.”

As quickly as Mizu is there she’s gone in the next instant. The lip of her cup against her mouth. Standing back up like nothing happened. Her hand is still on Akemi’s waist though. A warm firm heat.

“I’m eager.” Akemi replies. Makes her eyes wider and bites into her lip.

Mizu frowns then. Takes another sip of her drink and sets it on a nearby stool, “No. You’re confused.”

The hand disappears then. The cold shocks Akemi as she makes an aborted sound. A start to a sentence.

“But, I-“

“I don’t fuck straight girls.” Mizu states simply. She’s turned back to the room now, disinterested. No longer facing Akemi, the illusion of privacy is lost. The sounds of billiard games come back and Akemi startles.

“I’m not…not—“ not straight. Was that right? It didn’t feel completely right. Not completely wrong either. Akemi didn’t know exactly. Wasn’t meant to be thinking about it right now. She was here for an answer to a question, “I want to.” Akemi feels like it’s an okay response to her swirling thoughts.

Mizu doesn’t answer. Doesn’t even look at her. Rather, she chugs the rest of her drink and walks back to the bartop. Akemi feels the air brush by her and she stews in annoyance at the outcome. Doesn’t know why when she’s the one who is apparently walking around with a giant neon sign that says straight girl.

She finishes the rest of her fizzy sweet drink and eats the cherry. It tastes like her childhood and she chuckles at the irony. Wonders what young Akemi would think about her right now. Trying to get some in her hometown because she’s what? lonely? As if no one else in the existence of the world hadn’t been lonely.

She chats up some guys that buy her drinks for the rest of the night. It’s familiar and all the tricks work on them easily. There’s no fight about it. No pushing for more. No pulling for dominance. Cat and mouse be damned. Akemi convinces herself she likes it.

Mizu doesn’t linger inside long and soon enough she’s out of Akemi’s sight. Akemi tells herself she doesn’t care.

A couple drinks turn into more and suddenly Akemi’s drunk. It dawns on her that she’s had more than she thought when the guy she’s talking to grabs her waist as she stumbles. The touch is in the same place Mizu placed her hand earlier. It doesn’t feel nearly as intense.

Akemi promises she’s fine to walk when she leaves the bar with her purse and phone in hand. The December cold shocks some alcohol out of her, and makes her realize she’s left her coat inside.

“Urgh.” She’s turning around to head back inside when she notices a figure at the edge of the building. Plumes of smoke flow out of Mizu’s mouth and Akemi can smell the tabaco from where she stands.

Maybe it’s the alcohol or the cold realization that Mizu may have been right that Akemi stumbles over. A fight is what she wants, but what she gets is another pretty cocked eyebrow and lips that must taste like cigarette smoke.

“You smoke?”

Mizu seems surprised by her confidence but quickly recovers.

“Yes. Need a light?”

Akemi is upset for some reason. There’s been no success tonight and she’s determined to make it Mizu’s problem.

“I don’t smoke. Too bitter.”

“I have a vape too.” Mizu suggests, scooting over for Akemi to lean next to her, “‘ts sweeter.”

Akemi throws a glare at Mizu. She’s still beautiful under the combined glow of a nearby street lamp and the reflecting christmas lights that hang off the roof above them. The falling snow only makes Akemi’s heart thunder.

“Don’t do that either.” Akemi mumbles, pouts despite being the one who denied it, “My ex used to be addicted. I hate the smell.”

“Huh.” Mizu says inhaling another pull before exhaling away from Akemi. It’s gentle, the way she holds concern for Akemi, “Ex-boyfriend?”

“Ugh not this again.”

Mizu casts her a glance. A faraway knowing look that makes Akemi feel so young. Almost like she’s a kid again. Not like she’s just graduated. She pouts harder.

“I’m interested. I want to…I want to try it.” Akemi says. She’s shy now after all her big emotions have worn themselves out with the stretch of silence on Mizu’s end, “And you’re hot.”

Mizu chuckles, takes another drag and then flicks her cigarette into the snow. Turns towards Akemi and pushes into her space. There’s the touch on Akemi’s waist again. It feels colder than before. Akemi groans.

“You don’t know what you want.” Mizu says. Her voice has dropped and become deeper. She’s frowning down at Akemi. A wolf under the full moon. Akemi is trapped and her breath hitches. Her thighs squeeze together, “Don’t even know the first thing about being with a woman.”

“I-I..I do!” Akemi stutters. Determined to win this game she’s started.

“Oh yeah?” Mizu asks, pushing pushing pushing.

“Yeah..” Akemi didn’t notice earlier that Mizu had freckles. A smattering of them on the bridge of her nose and beauty marks on her chin, her cheekbone, the edge of her lips, “We make out first.”

Mizu smirks, gives Akemi room to wrap her arms around Mizu’s neck.

“Okay.”

It’s a clear go ahead and Akemi is pressing her lips to Mizu’s. There’s no finesse. Two lips touching. Akemi pulls away and is flushed from her own actions. She avoids Mizu’s eyes and looks at the expanse of forest that engulfs their tiny town instead.

Mizu is still close, her nose brushing Akemi’s own. Her breath is hot on Akemi’s face. She smells like cigarettes and suddenly Akemi doesn’t mind it at all.

“Cute. Now let me show you how. Properly.”

Mizu tilts Akemi’s chin up. They’re looking at one another now. The tinted glasses now gone from Mizu’s face. Akemi wants.

“Understood?” Mizu asks. Her hand has slipped to the back of Akemi’s back, brushing her tattooed collarbone with the movement. Her other hand has clamped down on the jut of exposed skin and Akemi whimpers.

“U-understood.”

And then Mizu is kissing her. It’s nothing like Akemi’s gentle kiss. This kiss is wet and hot. A pressing smear of heat against Akemi’s mouth. Her mouth is open and suddenly Mizu’s tongue is there licking and exploring. Mizu’s hand presses into Akemi’s hip and slips under the velvet and Akemi shakes despite herself. Pulls away to gasp at the cold press of Mizu’s palm against her ribs.

Mizu laughs, kissing her jaw and ear and chin as Akemi huffs out little whines.

“Pathetic. Can’t keep up at all.” Mizu growls. She grips the back of Akemi’s neck. Hard, “Not done. Take it.”

Mizu kisses her like they’re going to fuck.

Akemi realizes this when Mizu’s hand leaves the sensitive skin of her ribs and drifts under her skirt. Up the tights on her thigh and underneath the line of her ass. Her fingertips find her underwear and the wet of her cunt. It’s brief and gone before it’s even fully there, but Akemi whimpers and accidentally bites down on Mizu’s lip at the feeling.

“Hah.” Akemi’s lips feel puffy and swollen when they part. The sound alone makes Akemi wetter, pushing her thighs together tighter for friction, “Please..” She reaches up for more, and Mizu stands up fully then. The distance too great for Akemi to close by herself.

“No.” Mizu says. Her pupils are blown and the blue that Akemi was mesmerized with is now harder to make out.

Akemi shivers at Mizu’s blatant staring and is surprised to find Mizu’s own breathing is staggered. Clearly affected after all.

“You’re cold.” Mizu steps away then, hands coming undone around her. Akemi feels like a puppet with its strings cut, boneless against the wall. She shivers hard, proving Mizu’s point, “Here.”

Akemi’s bundled up in Mizu’s sweater when Mizu invites her over. It’s a clear indication of more and Akemi’s chest hammers with the implication. She nods shyly, shoving her hands into Mizu’s jacket pockets. Is surprised to be met with gum wrappers, coffee straws, and sticky notes.

“No sex tonight. You’re drunk. I have roommates.” Mizu explains just as Akemi is trying to discretely update the group chat with the recent events, “There aren’t any buses running now and I live nearby so..”

“But! you kissed me!” Akemi whines. Ah, she can hear the way the alcohol has made her voice more pitchy. She nearly misses the down step of the curb but Mizu catches her, hand strong around her waist, “Okay, fine. But, can we make out some more?”

Mizu nods sagely. She leads Akemi towards the sidewalk. The falling snow lands on her head and shoulders and Akemi wants to leave marks there if she’s allowed. Akemi distantly thinks that Mizu would be into that, being in charge.

I’ll find out tomorrow morning.. Akemi thinks, delighted at the loophole she’s found. She presses into Mizu’s side as they walk back together.

[schismusic]

Joy Division, or: how I learned to stop worrying and love New Order, too

Spring is weird as hell because one time you have this glaring sun that powers you up like being plugged into a wall outlet, then not five minutes later clouds begin to gather and you feel like you're going to die if anything goes south. So the most obvious combination to represent two sides of this same coin, emotional and meteorological, is Joy Division and New Order.

Sometimes you need Transmission or Shadowplay for the sunny days — impassioned jolts, sparks flying everywhere. Sometimes The Perfect Kiss hits harder on a cloudy afternoon, coming back home and in need of that extra push to not fall asleep in the train. It's surprising to realize the versatility displayed by both bands, or the same band in two different iterations according to whomever you ask. Peter Hook says, as late as 1993, that the laziest member of New Order is Ian Curtis. Or again this other person, in the comments under the Atmosphere official video on YouTube, who went to see New Order (Hooky-less New Order, which might be a relevant distinction) at the O2 Arena a couple of years ago and they gave an encore, says "Those of us who stayed got the privilege of watching Joy Division perform three of their songs". Interesting outlook on the matter. I personally saw Peter Hook and the Light play both Joy Division records and, I'm pretty sure, an encore comprised of just Love Will Tear Us Apart at the Arti Vive Festival in Soliera, back when it was still free to attend some of the events. I remember being pretty mad that Hooky had stopped to take pics with basically everyone and then left exactly as I was approaching. In retrospect I don't exactly blame the man, it was like midnight anyway. I remember nothing of the back trip home.

My first contact with Joy Division happened when I was thirteen and very much in my prog era. I was in Rome staying at an aunt of mine's place for my fourteenth birthday and she told me I could get a CD, since I had gotten some money saved up over time. Some Facebook page dedicated to Pink Floyd I'd liked (yeah, Facebook at age thirteen — I literally just wanted to play a fucking Flash game, back when Facebook allowed them, and I ended up getting to be terminally online. Crazy how things turn out) used to share a lot of memes and fanart relating to the Unknown Pleasures album cover, and me being a massive Pink Floyd head at the time I thought "I mean, if these guys are pushing this band so hard, that's gotta mean something". The album cover was pretty striking, admittedly: a far cry from the paisley ass paintings that I had grown to accept as the gold standard for the music I liked, but its simplicity struck a chord closer to The Dark Side of the Moon, or perhaps The Wall. Those were records I liked a lot, probably called them "the best records ever made" to more than one person, not like they aren't but that's a very bold statement to make when your listening experience consists exactly of

Madonna's Confessions on a Dance Floor when I was six;

Daft Punk's complete discography (minus Random Access Memories, which wasn't out yet) when I was twelve;

Pink Floyd's complete discography, courtesy of a CD collection coming out with some Italian newspaper, that same year;

a couple random classic rock records recommended to me by older friends and relatives usually well into their fifties or sixties at the time, random people on Internet forums — which, for clarification, I did not actively attend, preferring to just lurk from time to time — and the OndaRock "milestones" page.

So browsing through the surprisingly expansive CDs section of this electronics shop in Rome, and being mesmerized by a vinyl rack in the days when Music on Vinyl was the final frontier of pretending you could re-analogue the digital ("you mean to tell me these are like CDs, but bigger? Whoever designed these truly lived in the future"), I came across that very same album art that had stricken me so hard. I had listened to the first seconds of the album on YouTube, but that weird drum sound — so echoey, so distant, ultimately not particularly powerful, meaning it didn't really sound like Bonzo: it sounded more like my own band, which at the time didn't even exist yet — I didn't really know what to make of. This store I was in had one of those preview listening machines that would scan the barcode on the CDs and give you a small snippet of the song. I pull the CD up to the scanner, the scanner lights up green, I put on the headphones and the solo from this comes up:

Clearly they had to be kidding me. I had come to know, sneaking into infinitely many rehearsals with the band from my mother's town, what it sounded like when someone tried to play lead without something else filling up the arrangement (even though I didn't really know all that, or at least lacked the vocabulary to properly express it) and, for Christ's sake, didn't these guys notice rehearsing? It sounded empty, weirdly so, and it wasn't my thing, I thought. I put that CD away and picked up a band I knew I'd like — Genesis, specifically. So Nursery Cryme became the first CD I've ever paid with my own money, the very day I turned fourteen. Not a bad pickup. I remember being very impressed with the fast blurring lead guitar on The Musical Box and digging the sweet pastoral atmospheres of For Absent Friends and Harlequin. I still think of that record more often than one would probably assume looking at this blog, or my most played on Spotify. At the time, that was the best move I could take, really: why beat my head against a record that, as your average prog nerd ballbreaker, simply wasn't speaking to me?

Then all of a sudden in August of the same year my friend's dad hands me a 16 gigabyte USB drive, full of random music from all eras of rock. A lot of it remains inscrutable to me for a really long time, most notably Tom Waits (see related post), but I spent the whole month reading random folder names, seeing if something catches my eyes, and at one point I come across the Mars Volta. Open the folder up, read the names of their first three records, and my first thought is "Christ, these guys look incomprehensible. I'm about to have some fun". Long story short: I end up having a lot of fun, the Mars Volta turns into my favourite band at the time and finding out that they had previously been called At the Drive-In makes me gain some measure of respect for punk rockers: if they tried hard enough, I must've thought, they could prog as hard as anyone. In the meantime the ghost of Joy Division remains at the back of my head. I feel like I'm missing something, for the first time in my life: it's not them, it's me. Too bad that same realization didn't occur to me when it came to the people in my life until much, much later, but that's being fourteen for you I suppose. Early King Crimson and the Mars Volta were the pinnacle of violence to me, and not even the very few Metallica songs I'd downloaded just to see what would happen scratched that itch. It felt a bit too cauterized for some reason (I would later find out I had been looking in the wrong direction the whole time: the Black Album "sucked", according to my favourite metalhead of the time, who somehow catalyzed my interest from the very second I saw him in the school's courtyard. Hard to imagine why I would imprint on people like puppies do, but what the fuck, not like I've ever outgrown that anyway, I've just gotten better at managing it). But I felt there was more than violence to this, or different forms of violence. When Christmas came around and my relatives tried to get me presents, my mother asked if there was anything specific I was interested in, and I basically told her "look, if they can get me some CDs off of this list, I'm golden". It had some bangers on it, namely Noctourniquet by the Mars Volta — it's one of their best and I will die on this hill, be warned — and The Downward Spiral, which might as well warrant its own post in an ideal world. But the best of them all I think came from a random purchase, once again with the little money I had lying around at the time.

Closer appears to be, right away, a bit more concrete, and if there's something inexperienced music fans like is a pretty packaging that conjures a strong emotional response before they've even played the record. Compare a color-inverted graph of pulsar emissions to a literal funerary monument. Opening up the booklet I was shocked to see that Genesis was used as a negative point of comparison (bad omen, I thought) by people close to the band, and I came across much more detailed information about Ian Curtis's untimely demise — at that time, something far too removed from my experience to be faced with the delicacy and attention it deserves. Atrocity Exhibition hits like a ten-ton truck, a reference which at the time I wouldn't have been able to make for obvious reasons, and Isolation exposes all the nerve tissue under the skin. Passover comes in and strips everything even barer, and then A Means to an End turns… danceable, for some reason? Big emotional moment with The Eternal and Decades, which I thought actually took them closer to my usual tastes. And yet at the same time I kept looking at Colony, Heart and Soul and Twenty Four Hours as the most compelling cuts. Geometric assault sounding like sheet metal if it were music; rhythmically driven emptiness that serves as a minimal backdrop for depressed poetry, and finally a rocking ebb-and-flow that would probably inform a lot of my interest in GY!BE-like post-rock in the coming years. Very interesting to think that the same guys who'd done Unknown Pleasures could think of this. To this day, when asked, I still do think that Closer is the best Joy Division record, but what does it even mean when the records are exactly two, compilations notwithstanding?

It was around this time that it came to my attention that both Joy Division and another band called New Order had a record called Substance out, both published by the same recording company, both coming out within a year of each other. Looking it up, it turns out it's fully intentional, because New Order is simply Joy Division minus Ian Curtis. It would turn out to be a tad bit more complex than that. Anyway, I look New Order up and kind of have to do a double-take. Synthpop? In my Joy Division? More likely than you'd think, considering Isolation exists. But yeah, that sort of seals it — I wouldn't care about this New Order for a million years. Until all of a sudden a couple of years later David Sylvian bursts like a comet in my face, which of course leads me straight to Japan, the same year as I'd come across Berlin-era Bowie, and you can probably guess where this is going, right?

Well, you'd be wrong. I still don't check out New Order. There's a whole new world open to me — vaporwave and therefore R Plus Seven come to my attention, which leads me to dissect that record like an alien tool of unclear purposes. This of course leads me onto an ambient tangent, taking me back to my Tim Hecker listens of that same year, which has the effect of renewing my interest in "pure" electronic music and the then-rising post-dubstep movement. The sheer experience of sound, the dazzling modernity and innovation, is what's in at the time. I have no time for nostalgia-pandering dimwits: the future awaits. Then all that jazz from the first Godflesh post hits, then God pulls the funniest gag in the history of viral infections to my memory, and I have some time to actually look back, a bit less prejudiced. As it turns out, synthpop is not the devil, as some of you might have surmised by now, and as I relisten to Blue Monday I realized I have never listened to either of the Substance record. I do know some, most perhaps?, of the tracks on the Joy Division one, and I do think the New Order one has the more striking cover art — not to mention I knew, by this time, that this was the one to give Metal Gear Solid 2: Substance its name, and that Your Silent Face soundtracked one of the most memorable moments in Nicolas Winding Refn's Bronson. As the ultimate Hideo Kojima stan, I couldn't let this slide, so I pop the record on and get hit with this:

Way to go, guys. Holy shit. I knew that Ceremony was a Joy Division cut before they could record it, but what the hell — Bernard got it, too. It wasn't a matter of singing ability with songs like these, it's just getting it, finding the right energy. They had that right energy. And then it hit me just as many times these dudes have made Blue Monday over and over again before actually getting it right, and everytime I look into it it's funnier and funnier to realize just how many different attempts it took them to finally be Kraftwerk, but augmented — with the stellar results we all know. Everything's Gone Green, 5 8 6, Temptation potentially, all lead up to this one moment in the history of dance music where somehow three dudes and a girl hailing from Manchester managed to out-gay the Pet Shop Boys (by their own admission, apparently), to shake the whole world's collective booty, to do whatever it is they were supposed to do in this last comparison that would ideally make the previous one a bit less obnoxious but whatever, it's 3am as usual, you know how it goes by now don't you? But then after Blue Monday the record keeps going, and thank god it does, because it's banger after banger. How do these guys keep doing it?

So I spend some time with that record, then it fades down, then it comes back up last month, when the weather calls for it and its parent company. Which is when I find myself watching the Control movie for the first time, surprisingly enough seeing as I already enjoyed the work of Anton Corbijn as a photographer. Looking at all that, it is revealed to me that Joy Division never really having died is not a bug, it's a feature. Everyone is gasping, I get it, but please pick your jaws up and check this out: the band has never learned how to play their respective instruments. One might go so far as to argue they play their own stuff their own way, and that's basically it. Nothing could be further from the truth. These guys jammed, a lot; that's how Joy Division wrote songs, that's how New Order wrote songs, even going as far as having Bernard Sumner fucked up on acid so he could find the chorus to Temptation or the whole band bombed out of their minds on X in Ibiza clubs to write, basically, the entirety of Technique — and even then, not really, there's a couple jangly tracks that the X would most likely render unlistenable but what do I really know? Point being: it might now have been sparked by a music teacher or instructor, it might not have been the product of a process comparable to that within Television, which led them to organically seek out better, more "by the book" musicianship, but New Order were incredibly familiar with their instruments, had formed an element of comfort and understanding that counterbalanced the alien-ness to music terminology.

Peter Hook recently uploaded a Yamaha-sponsored video to his Instagram, which I am pretty sure has a say in running, where he jams on a Yamaha bass and, you know, it sounds like Hooky alright, but it's never a discernible bassline until he kicks into the A major strumming that opens Love Will Tear Us Apart. Before that, he just strolls around the neck, leisurely strumming away at power chords imbued with that thick chorus and reverb combo he became renowned for. I would never, in my wildest dreams, have imagined I'd find myself thinking "okay, awesome, stop talking — I want to hear you jam a bit more" referring to one of the musicians who were part of possibly two of the craziest storiest in the history of contemporary rock'n'roll, also notorious for playing the rockstar whilst carrying the minimum possible baggage of technical knowledge he could. Once again, this is nowhere near a knock to the man — quite the opposite. Ian Curtis asked "persistence, well, what does it matter?", and Hooky (and, of course, the other members of New Order) found a way to constructively answer that question. Moments before Coil, but a bit later than Israel Regardie, they said "persistence is all" and built a brand on finding a way to consistently sound like splendid, eternal, golden children: "like crystal", impassionate, tightly-knit performers with the purity of a child's heart. Ian Curtis had, in certain ways (at least artistically), the purity of a child in his heart, which some might even argue was a distinguishing feature of most of his literary idols — if you think about it, William Burroughs could be your dirty-minded classmate who walked in on his parents sharing an intimate moment in the bedroom (had his parents been gay men, the metaphor would probably fly better, but that most definitely wasn't the case). So the heart of Joy Division remains untouched, if a bit more naked. Heroes of post-punk, sons of the silent age, you can sleep soundly tonight.

[dreamlandforever]

Welcome? To Hellfire Club - Part 3

Here's part 3! It is a lot more introspection into Jeff than anything else, but I have had this in mind for a bit. Hope you like it!

Part 1 Part 2

Part 3 - Hellfire Club

Even though Jeff was really invested in the game, he had also kept his attention on his surroundings all evening, and unlike Gareth, Jeff doesn’t really have anything against Steve, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t still make him feel a little nervous. Jeff, and he is almost certain Freak as well, believe that Steve deserves a chance, especially because he is sure that whenever Eddie talks about “some dude” who saved him from the Earthquake, and “just a friend” that is driving him to and from his physical therapy, and “my buddy” who has his fridge full of Tupperware with food ready to just be re-heated, he is always referring to Steve Harrington. He has no proof, but he also doesn’t have any doubts, because pretty much every other friend Eddie has is sitting around the table.

He is almost certain that Gareth’s hatred towards Steve doesn’t have anything to do with Steve himself, but more with what he represents. Jeff is aware that Gareth is younger than he is, by about two years, which means he doesn’t really know Steve, but he certainly has heard the rumors. Tommy Hagan. Billy Hargrove. The King. He wasn’t there to see Steve’s fall or to know that no violence ever truly came to them freaks during his reign. But he was there for all of Carver’s ruling. 

Jeff remembers his Freshman Year, and how the worst bullying he got was a few taunting words here and then. Whenever Tommy would get violent, Steve was there to divert his attention. If anything, Steve could be considered a lot more of a mean girl than a bully. He knew exactly what to say to make you feel like trash, but he never once raised a fist against anyone. Until Jeff saw him come in with a black eye and a lot of bruises, but he still didn’t know what that was about. And, honestly, he seemed much too busy dating to really give them the time of day. Jason Carver was in no way the new Steve Harrington, and while Jeff hadn’t really given it much thought before now, he was realizing that Gareth didn’t know that. Carver had been his entire high school experience. 

Still, it feels like a betrayal to just be friendly to Steve. 

But here he was, taking care of the children Eddie had adopted, who all seemed to consider him more like a brother rather than a babysitter. And there was Eddie himself, who spoke like the guy was heaven sent. Jeff still didn’t buy the idea of his mysterious friend, it simply had to be Harrington, even if it didn’t exactly match Jeff’s pre-conceived idea of the man. 

Looking around the dining room as inconspicuous as possible, and Jeff has gotten really good at blending with the background as a way of survival ever since his first year of high school, he noticed that the only people who seemed tense were Gareth, Eddie Freak, and himself. Steve had appeared to be anxious about having them over when they first got there, and that had set off Jeff’s alarms. What had the man been expecting? But now, looking at everything Steve had done to ensure everyone was comfortable, and how he was now nodding off next to Robin, but still grasping the napkins where he kept the notes of the campaign, he was pretty sure he was actually nervous, and not anxious about them being there. 

In a way, it made sense. It also made absolutely no sense at all. Steve Harrington at his own home, and all they were, were the freaks of their high school, who had been hunted for murder in the spring. 

Somewhere between Jeff trying to decipher his feelings towards Harrington and following Eddie’s rather complex story line, Steve had woken up again. Standing next to the loveseat, instead of sitting on it, cracking his spine in a way that seemed absolutely horrifying to Jeff, but Harrington seemed to find lovely. 

“It’s already 8 pm, guys. I am making some sandwiches for a late dinner. You cannot go to bed with only sugar in your systems, your parents will kill me.” Steve said, breaking the silence that had fallen after Eddie had informed them that the corridor they had chosen was a dead-end, and they hadn’t figured a way out yet.  

“Don’t you guys have a curfew?” Jeff asked, before he had realized he was even speaking. 

Steve let out a nice laugh, “Yes, they do. But they are having a sleepover at Will’s, so I talked Joyce into letting them arrive a little later today. A little.” He responded, the last sentence an obvious threat directed at Dustin. Jeff wasn’t sure why Dustin, if Eddie was the one that called the shots here, but he ignored it, deciding to focus more on if they would also get sandwiches or just the kids. 

“I will help you.” Robin said, standing up slowly and yawning loudly. 

Steve shook his head again. “No, I can handle it, Bobby. Make sure I don’t miss anything?” She sat down with a nod, looking for the pen that had fallen while Steve and her had nodded off a few minutes ago.

“So, requests?” Steve asked, making his way to the kitchen. The kids started to scream so loud and so fast that Jeff couldn’t understand a thing, but Steve nodded along like he understood what they were saying, and then they shut up. Just like that. He saw Gareth’s impressed face as well, but it soon slipped back into a mask of indifference. Jeff wasn’t that in control of his own face, how the fuck did Harrington got them to shut up? Eddie always has to threaten them to achieve that. Jeff noticed that Steve was looking at them, still standing in the dining room.

“Guys?” He asked, prompting them to speak.

“Yes?” This time the question came from Freak, who seemed just as confused as Jeff.

“Sandwiches?” Steve repeated himself, as if that explained everything. When it didn’t elicit a response, he clarified. “What can I get for you? I know Eddie’s, but I don’t know yours, Kevin.” 

Freak almost jumped out of his seat in surprise. “I…uh, like cheese?” He said, stumbling over his own words. Jeff wasn’t sure anyone had called Freak by his government name in months.

Steve just nodded, unaware of any of this. “Is grilled cheese okay?” 

Freak nodded back. “You can…no one calls me Kevin” He said finally, and that seemed to make Steve nervous again.

“Oh, I am sorry. Did I get your name wrong?” 

“No, no. My name is Kevin. I just…I go by Freak.” He explained. “Please?” He added at the end, his voice a mixture of confusion and frustration. 

“I will have whatever Eddie is having.” Jeff said, as soon as Freak was done talking, to break the tension before it had any time to settle.

“Alright, grilled cheese for Freak, bologna for Jeff and Eddie, Gareth?” Steve asked, without missing a beat. Jeff wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but he knew Freak was a little sensitive about being called Kevin, so he Steve got some brownie points for that smooth move. 

“Nothing from you, Harrington. You are not our babysitter.” Gareth answered venomously.

Jeff expected Eddie to say something at that moment, but instead it was the kids who came to the man’s defense.

“No need for that!” Lucas half-yelled at Gareth.

“Not cool, man!” Dustin.

“He is not my babysitter!” Mike.

“I don’t think there’s any need to be rude.” came Will’s much calmer response. Jeff liked him, he had a good head on his shoulders.

Steve just raised his hand, making the kids fall silent again. He nodded once again and went into the kitchen, patting the wall he was leaning against twice before going. Jeff had always thought it was a weird thing for jocks to do, just pat or slap things around them.

Jeff forgot about the sandwiches about five minutes later, because Lucas just led them to a trap, and they are now head-to-head with a hoard of fucking Mephitis, until Steve comes out again with great smelling food.

“Okay, first up, Mike, Will, and Freak.” He informed everyone, waiting for them to open enough space on the table for him to set the plates in front of them. 

“Thank you, Steve!” Will says, taking his own plate. Mike just nods, and Freak looks at a loss, so he just nods too after a few seconds. 

Mike had what seemed like grilled cheese with tomato, Will had half a grilled cheese and half a peanut butter and jelly, and Freak had a regular grilled cheese. Steve must have noticed him looking because he quickly told him “It’s blueberry jam. I don’t know how bad the allergy is, but no strawberry anywhere in the kitchen, man.” Jeff nodded; he honestly hadn’t even thought about that.

“Thanks, man” Jeff calls after him, as Steve was almost out of sight back to the kitchen, but he saw him raise his hand up in acknowledgment. 

Steve re-appears once again with three more sandwiches, now one of them Jeff’s, the other one Eddie’s and the last one for Dustin. Jeff can see he has a bologna sandwich, with mustard and pickles. Eddie loves that shit, and Jeff is okay with that. Dustin has half a ham and cheese sandwich, and the other half of the peanut butter and jam that Will had. 

Steve comes out once again, but instead of handing out sandwiches, he sets two big plates on the table, one with an array of chopped up vegetables and another one with different chips. Instead of immediately going back to the kitchen, though, this time he clears his throat loudly. The kids immediately start complaining but started grabbing different vegetables to add to their sandwiches.  Eddie does too, after Robin starts lecturing him on iron deficiency. Jeff decides to do so as well in case anyone starts nagging at him as well. 

In his last run, Steve places what seems to be a ham and cheese right next to Gareth without a word, and goes to sit with Robin with their sandwiches. “Disgusting gilled cheese with bacon and apple for you” he announced, while Robin makes grabby hands at him excitedly. 

Will is rolling his dice in between bites of his sandwich, and Steve looks at Eddie meaningfully, Jeff sees his eyebrows almost reach his hairline. Eddie lets out a sigh, before announcing they were all taking a 15 minute break for dinner, and makes everyone put their dice away. That takes Jeff by surprise. They were always supposed to eat once the session was over, or make do with easy snacks they can eat while playing. 

And here they were, with a full 15 minute break, warm sandwiches in their plates, a big plate in the middle with different veggies and chips in case they wanted to add them, and drinks. 

___________________________________________

Steve knows that the Harrington charm will not work this time. It might actually work against him. So, after Robin shoots him a weird look for the umpteenth time to get him to relax, he decides to do that and act as he normally would, just Steve. He is trying to make them like him without having to be someone else, anyway. 

However, if he can force feed Max after physical therapy, he can make a sandwich for Gareth even if he won’t eat it. So he places the plate besides the man and goes to sit himself, without saying a word. He can be angry if he wants, but Steve is not going to sink to that level. He doesn’t feel like he has to.

And that’s when he notices that Will is eating with one hand, to be able to hold his dice with the other. Steve shoots Eddie a look, which the man ignores. Steve doesn’t move, though, so eventually after a few seconds, Eddie just groans and, after letting out a sigh tells everyone to take 15, as he himself gets to eating. 

Eddie usually gives them 10-30 minutes to eat whenever the game went long enough to clash with lunch or dinner time, depending on how hard Steve was willing to fight him on that, but considering that he had just made them sandwiches, the 15 minutes were enough. 

 “Dustin, chew better before swallowing you are going to choke” Steve scolds, after the boy has to drink half a juice box to be able to swallow for the second time. Dustin rolls his eyes at him, but does start to take smaller bites. Steves ignores him, in favor of continuing to eat his own sandwich, already loaded with vegetables and mayonnaise. 

Mike reaches over the table for more chips for his sandwich, while Will places half of his peanut butter and jam on his plate. Mike smiles at him, placing a fourth of his already cut sandwich in Will’s plate. 

Jeff finds that interesting. He had heard a lot about Will, the missing member of the kid’s group, but he never really thought he would fit it that easily in Hellfire in general. 

___________________________________________

Eddie calls it a night at 9:30, since Steve had been shooting him looks since 9 pm and Eddie figured the most he can stretch that out was half an hour without really getting in trouble with the man. While he is marking where everyone was and the last actions they took in his notebook, he tells them he will let them know when and where the next session is.

“I thought we were now playing here?” Mike asks, looking at Steve instead of at Eddie. 

Steve nods without missing a beat.  “I thought so, too. You know you can keep coming here, Eddie. No need to move anything, either. I rarely use the table, you can just continue instead of taking a bunch of notes.” He said simply, continuing to clean up the snack table with Robin’s help. They were probably going to sleep over at Jonathan’s as well, since they were going to be driving over so late and the movie was at least an hour and a half long, so they had to finish before leaving. 

Mike nodded, going back to his conversation with Will, shouldering his backpack without moving anything on the actual table. Jeff stared at that interaction. 

“We don’t fit in the car, so you guys are going to have to squeeze together in the back” Steve informed them, before disappearing inside the kitchen.

Just like that, the decision seemed to be made, because all the kids stopped taking notes and just grabbed their bags. 

Dustin was about to complain, when Robin stuck her tongue out at him. “I am older, I have shotgun privileges.”

“I have known him longer, I have seniority!” He fought back, sticking his tongue back at her. 

“You are fifteen, Dusty-buns, you do not get seniority.”

“She’s right, man, she gets shotgun tonight. You can ride shotgun tomorrow on our way to your house.” Steve said, coming back into the dining room. 

Now it was Robin’s turn to complain, if her outraged expression was anything to go by, but before she could utter a word, Steve interrupted.

“We are just dropping him off, Robin, you can ride shotgun again when we pick Max up for her appointment tomorrow morning.” Robin nodded at that.  

“We are taking her to the mall afterwards, don’t forget.” Robin reminded him.

“Oh, you are right. I need to get jeans, then.” He said, running upstairs. 

“Bring me one of your swim team shirts!” She called after him. 

When Steve came back, he had a bag thrown over his shoulder, and he handed a shirt that was probably too big for Robin at her, which she stuffed in her own backpack. 

“We are going to Jonathan’s to watch movies, if you want to join us?” Steve invites the older members of the club. “We are watching Friday the 13th or The Evil Dead, I am not sure, if you want to join us.” 

Gareth refuses with a snort, and the rest of the guys turn down the invitation following his lead. Although Jeff seems to consider it, he ultimately sides with Gareth. 

Jeff looked back the kids, trying to come to some sort of conclusion. They seemed to trust Steve completely, even Mike Wheeler, who seemed to be angry at life. He seemed to give Steve a hard time, fighting back on everything the man said, but he never once said anything against Steve himself. And when the question of where they were playing next had come, he had immediately looked at Steve, like he was sure the man would let them continue coming to his place. Like he was used to Steve making decisions.

The most surprising part was that the man had agreed easily, and Mike had nodded like he knew that was the answer before he said it and had only spoken it out loud for the rest of the people in the room.

Dustin had nothing but praise to sing about the man. Lucas too, when given the chance. If you got that kid started on sports, he was off on basketball and Steve. It’s just that Jeff never thought he actually meant Steve Harrington. They all just used his first name. 

Eddie refuses, too, but Jeff sees he seems even more hesitant to refuse than he did. Steve looks at Eddie weirdly, like he was expecting him to accept, but nods, saying goodbye to everyone, agreeing to meet back at his place next Thursday. Steve says they can start earlier this time, if they want, because this Thursday is his and Robin’s day off. Steve Harrington is hosting them on his fucking day off. 

And wait, did he say he works with Robin Buckley? Doesn’t she work in retail or something like that? Is that what The King is doing now?

Jeff decides that he will give Steve Harrington a chance. Most of his uncertainty comes from Eddie’s very telling silence. He is the one who brought them here, but has yet to say anything about Gareth’s comments or behavior. If by the end of the campaign, which may or may not be next session, the former king does anything that seems like a threat to him or any of his friends, anything that lets him know that Steve is anything but genuine, Jeff will side with Gareth and they can all find somewhere else to hold Hellfire Club. But if he keeps behaving the way he has been so far, he himself will call a Corroded Coffin meeting and speak on the man’s behalf, because Jeff believes in autonomy and earning your respect, not letting society determine every one’s role. 

taglist: @steddie-as-they-go@cinnamon-mushroomabomination@queerdeerling@space-invading-pigeon@starman-jpg@swimmingbirdrunningrock @sofadofax @lessqn @hyperfixationgoddess

[shanesboyfriend]

The Flower Dance (Shane x Reader)

haha first post and its already very self indulgent. anyways, this is based on how i've always danced with shane at the flower dance, since i basically shower him in gifts!! hope you enjoy!

Shane x male!Reader (he/him)

Summary: Obviously you wanted to dance with him. Without a doubt. But you knew he had issues with trust. If you asked him to dance though, he might be upset. Might think your request was a way of you making fun of him or he might take it the wrong way. If he wasn't interested romantically in you, he might close himself off again. There were a lot of ways this could go wrong...

Moving into the Valley was, so far, the best decision you'd ever made.

The Spring had been peaceful and, while you were still finding your footing with this whole farming thing, you'd been doing pretty well! You'd already grown a decent amount of parsnips and the new potatoes and cauliflowers were growing perfectly. Currently you were saving up for some green beans. Though you weren't exactly thinking that hard about that right now.

Right now, you were looking yourself over in a full body mirror, frowning slightly at the blue suit, embroidered with faint, lighter blue floral patterns. "I dunno, Haley," you hummed with a squinted your eyes at yourself, turning to see yourself from the side. "Isn't it a bit..."

"Tacky?" The blonde girl giggled from where she sat on her own bed. Her sister, Emily, had been kind enough to make you an outfit for the Flower Dance this year though you were questioning if the suits were really supposed to be this... uncomfortable. "Yeah," Haley sighed wistfully. "Mayor Lewis loves tradition though. Em's offered to give the outfits an upgrade but he's always refused." She pulled the edge of her skirt down slightly, the soft white fabric looking pretty on her.

Were you not gay, she would undoubtedly been the girl of your dreams.

"At least your dresses are pretty," you pointed out with a pout. "You guys have more stylistic freedom." The men had to wear blue suits with white button up shirts while the girls could wear any white dress so long as the skirt was knee-length.

Haley shrugged with a smirk. "Wear a dress next year then." You paused at her suggestion. The idea tempted you honestly...

Emily knocked on the door quickly. "You guys ready? I don't want us to be late."

"Coming, Em." Haley rolled her eyes almost dramatically. As you got closer to the sisters, they would often comment to you how 'weird' it was that they were sisters, like they were so different they couldn't possibly be related. But then they'd immediately do something so sister-like it floored you.

But hey, what did you know?

The walk to the fields wasn't too long nor was it as bad as you thought it would be in dress clothes. Haley complained a bit about how she didn't want grass stains on her shoes and Emily pointed out how they'd be dancing in a field so it didn't matter.

"Soooo... what's the point of this dance?" You asked as the three of you neared the clearing. You'd understood the point of the Egg Festival and the egg hunt had been fun, but this festival was unknown to you. There'd been nothing like this in the city.

Emily made a little happy sound, twirling a bit as she walked. "Something about fertility rituals." You immediately paled and she just laughed good-naturedly. "The meaning has changed over the years, don't worry!" Emily did another twirl with a reassuring smile. "Nowadays, the dance is just something couples or close friends do together..." She seemed wistful as she stared out at the open field "Dancing is how I feel connected to the world around me." Emily said, almost a dreamy tone to her voice. "I've never bought into the idea of self. It's more sensible to me that we are all ripples in the universe... So dancing makes me feel like I'm apart of the universe, a ripple of my own."

You and Haley shared a look as her sister adjusted the red flower in her blue hair. "She's weird," Haley whispered as Emily made her way into the clearing and out of earshot. "I never understand how her mind works..." Haley sighed with a shake of her head, the flower crown on her head rustling..

Shrugging, you just followed after Haley as she led the way towards Alex. "She's nice though. Could be worse."

Haley gave you a look. "Like that'd stop you." She teased, making you blush.

Her comment wasn't untrue, you thought to yourself as your eyes drifted across the field and landed on a very particular man. One you had, despite his best interest, whittled down enough to be considered a friend. Buying him drinks had certainly earned you favor but the pizza you'd bought him for his birthday had sealed the deal.

You were friends with Shane. Regardless of how hard he'd tried to be mean to you, he'd softened with you. You'd shared a drink with him by the lake and listened to his troubles, his drunken ramblings. At one point, a few days ago, he'd asked if he'd ever gotten sentimental when drunk. You'd lied and said no and he'd told you that, should he ever get that way, to forget whatever he said.

He had issues with intimacy and trust. You had issues with a need to be useful and you did things without really thinking or planning. But hey, it'd landed you here, so maybe it wasn't all bad.

When you had told Haley about your budding friendship with Shane a few days ago, she hadn't even pretended to be surprised. "You befriended me before anyone else," she had said as she painted your nails, "Clearly you have a 'type' of person you like."

You'd chosen to not think about it too much.

"Sooo... you gonna ask him to dance with you?" Present day Haley asked, hands resting on her hips.

Staring at Haley, a few thoughts crossed your mind. First one was that you were never confiding secrets in Haley again. Second was a worry that you were obvious in your feelings for him.

You glanced quickly across the field at Shane, dressed in a plain blue blazer and matching dress pants, the white shirt unbuttoned just a bit at the top and he'd clearly abstained from wearing a tie. He seemed to be conversing with Alex, likely about the recent gridball game. They liked the same team, as far as you knew. Shane seemed so enthralled in the conversation he didn't even notice you staring.

"I have no idea what you mean." You said to Haley with undeserved confidence.

She leveled you with an unimpressed look. "Uh huh. Sure babe. Look, Shane's never been asked to dance by anyone in this town that, like, actually wanted to dance with him specifically. He and Emmy only dance together 'cuz it's mutually beneficial." Haley smirked at you. "He'd probably be reeeeal happy if you asked him. Since you like him and all."

You paused at that, feeling a pang in your heart as you blushed. As Haley walked off to go practice her dance moves, you mulled over her words. You knew Shane hadn't grown up in the valley and, up until a few years ago, he'd never needed to participate in the dance.

So the idea that Shane had never danced with someone who liked him made you feel weird. Not pitiful but something close.

Obviously you wanted to dance with him. Without a doubt. But you knew he had issues with trust. If you asked him to dance though, he might be upset. Might think your request was a way of you making fun of him or he might take it the wrong way. If he wasn't interested romantically in you, he might close himself off again. There were a lot of ways this could go wrong...

You felt yourself zone out. A lot of your thoughts surrounding Shane and what you were going to do. You were so entranced that you didn't even see the little figure approaching you until she tugged on your arm. "Oh!" You exclaimed, looking down at Jas. "Hey sweetheart. You need something?"

Since moving to the town, you'd become familiar with a lot of the townspeople. Jas included. You brought her daffodils almost every morning and chatted with her when you saw her. She was a sweet girl, very mature and observant for her age. Marnie had talked a little bit about her parents being gone, that her mom had been Marnie's niece and Shane's sister. That her death had been devastating.

Jas was acutely aware of her parent's existences. She'd been barely two when they'd died but talking about them upset her immensely.

"Are you going to ask Uncle Shane to dance?" Jas asked innocently, a too-knowing look behind her eyes.

You felt your face heat up, looking away nervously. "Ah, um, well, I... I dunno if he'd want to dance with me. I'm sure he'd rather dance with Emily..."

Jas looked up at you and giggled, almost like you'd said something ridiculous. "He talks about you a lot! I hear him sometimes in the barn talking to Charlie. He really, really likes you." She smiled, taking your hand in hers. "C'mon! I'll help ya!"

"J-Jas- No it's okay! You don't have to-" You stuttered as the girl pulled you across the field. Secretly, though, you let her lead you. A deep part of you wanted Shane to dance with you and Jas could be a good buffer if he said no. Even if he did reject you, he may be softer about it with Jas present...

At least you wouldn't be stewing over 'what-ifs'...

"Uncle Shane!" Jas called, practically skipping over.

Shane's head snapped over immediately, his eyes on her before he looked at you. It made your stomach do flips and made your face heat up. As much as he believed he had fucked up with Jas, he clearly adored her and she adored him in turn. He wasn't perfect, far from it, but you knew he cared.

The thought he'd make a good dad was quickly stamped out before it could blossom.

"What's up squirt?" Shane asked, making his way over. Alex had walked off to go see Haley so it was just the three of you. At least that'd lessen your embarrassment if he rejected you.

Jas said nothing, just reached over and took his hand in hers. Before Shane could ask her what was up, she pressed your hands together, your fingers tangling with Shane's. His hands were warm...

The older man blinked down at his goddaughter, a flush creeping up his neck. "Uhhh... Jas? What's, uh-"

"The farmer wants to dance with you!" She beamed, looking proud of herself and her matchmaking skills. "Have fun!" Jas said before skipping off to find Vincent.

Shane let go of your hand quickly and chuckled nervously. "Uh, sorry about her. She's- that's new from her."

You swayed a bit on your feet, feigning ignorance. "Yeah, I, um, I dunno what that was..." Swallowing, you decided to take a leap. "But, um, if you wanted to dance with me... I- I want to dance with you." You let out a breath you didn't know you'd been holding.

Shane stared at you like you'd grown two heads. "You... want to dance with me?" He asked incredulously. "I thought you'd be dancin' with Haley?"

Now it was your turn to stare. "What? No, I- Why would I be dancing with Haley?"

"Dude, you follow her around like a lost puppy." Shane smirked, giving you a look. "Figured you'd be with her."

You blushed a bit and gave him a shrug. "Well, I like you. I'd rather dance with you."

...Fuck, wait, shit!

Shane stared at you, gaze softening slowly. "You're serious?" His voice was soft. As if you were going to pull out the rug from underneath him. Make fun of him.

You nodded quickly, feeling your heart pounding in your chest. "I want to dance with you."

Shane let out a soft huff, smiling down at his shoes. "Yeah. Alright. Since it's you." You swore he was blushing as he rubbed the back of his neck. "Um. See you then?"

Feeling lightheaded, you nodded. You knew you were smiling dumbly as Shane walked away. You turned to watch him go and you wondered if he was just as nervous about the whole thing as you were.

[lovelyladyabsinthewrites]

Love Song for a Vampire Pt.21

Pairing(s): Edward Cullen x Wolf!Reader, Edward Cullen x Bella Swan Warnings: none Words: 3618 Summary: Evita and the Denali couple are introduced to the pack.

Part 1    Part 2    Part 3    Part 4  Part 5  Part 6  Part 7  Part 8  Part 9  Part 10  Part 11  Part 12  Part 13  Part 14  Part 15  Part 16  Part 17  Part 18  Part 19  Part 20  Part 22  Part 23  Part 24  Part 25  Part 26  Part 27  Part 28  Part 29  Part 30  Part 31  Part 32  Part 33  Part 34  Part 35  Part 36  Part 37  Part 38  Part 39

Against the soft, orange glow of your living room lights, Evita takes off her cloak and places it on her lap. Her tan skin was dappled with freckles, like a splash from a painter’s brush.Much like the wounds you had received from Xiomara, Evita also had what looked like claw marks raked along her cheek. You knew your parents were straining their ears to listen in on your conversation as they took refuge in their room.

Green eyes flick around her surroundings, examining the intimacy of your home. Running a tongue over her dry and chapped lips, Evita returns her gaze to you. “Sorry for springing up on you like this.” Each word is laced with a heavy accent. She mutters something in Spanish before shaking her head. “I’ve been fueled by the mission of finding my sister. Finding that Xiomara had killed her and then finding your blood. . . I wanted to hear what happened.”

“When we got there your sister was. . . Already dead. Probably had been for a while. And it wasn’t me who killed her. She put something in my drink. Put something in my friend’s drink too that prevented us from moving. We were saved by a vampire clan that is local in this town.”

Her brows scrunch up. “You are. . . Allied with the vampires?”

You tell her of the strife between the wolves and Cullens that had been going on for years. That things were now peaceful, well, somewhat peaceful. Many of the reserve’s elders didn’t like the fact that the Cold Ones could so easily enter their lands now. That the Cullens could turn on their words if it so pleased them. But the younger members of your pack were hopeful that the relationship with the Cullens was changing for the good. After all, it was thanks to the presence of the Cullens that caused the snap of wolf transformations.

“Ah, I see. . .” Evita’s eyes had grown distant when you had told her of how you came across the corpse of her sister. “I will pay them a visit too. But since it was your blood I found at my sister’s house, I wanted to check on you. See if you were still alive. Not many can say they encountered Xiomara and lived to tell the tale. Even many witches have fallen to her talons. You’re not entirely human are you?”

“No.” Mustering a pleasant smile, you can’t resist the giggle that rises in your throat. “Not entirely human.”

Evita returns your smile with one that portrayed an easy going nature. So young to be hunting down the murderer of her sister. She couldn’t have been much older than you. She braved a foreign country just to find out what had happened to Letizia. You wished there was better news that you could offer her. Some hope to bring home but you find none on your tongue. “Even so, you’re very lucky to be alive. With just a scar to mark your experience.”

You wonder if the scars on her face originated from the same owner: Xiomara. There was even one on her throat. How terrible had her encounter been?

While it was starting to get late, you knew you had to tell Sam. He would want to know. Especially if any other pack members had sniffed her entering their territory.

Excusing yourself to the kitchen, you bring out your phone to make a call to your alpha.

Having been there as well, Evita agreed to meet Sam. After promising your parents that you would be safe and text them when you got to Sam’s safely, you and Evita make a quiet walk over to his house. A trek you had made so many times before yet it felt different with the witch beside you. Her steps were soft, nearly a whisper against the rough, dirt road that led up to Sam’s small cabinesque house.

There were questions you had, begging for answers. You couldn’t quite voice them out though. You didn’t know her well enough, didn’t know yet if she would prove friend or foe. She said she wanted to thank you. What was the extent of her power? In your mind swirled thoughts you hand’s entertained in quite a while.

If your bond to Edward could indeed be erased. . . Well, that would solve a lot of conflicts that lay ahead. Bella could simply go back to him and they could continue their plans. She could become a vampire and spend eternity with him and you would be able to choose who you would end up with. The Volturi would hav eno reason to come if Bella held up her promise of turning into a vampire.

You hadn’t really explained your situation to Evita or the reason why you were in Letizia’s house in the first place. Imprinting was often a hard topic to explain to those who had no idea of the extent it went to.

Evita kept whatever thoughts were swirling in her head to herself. In the dark, her eyes appeared near black, nothing like the rich emerald hue that made her eyes pop. She kept her cloak tightly wrapped around her as she trudged forward. Her wealth of curls were like a dark cloud surrounding her face.

“I’m sorry about your sister.” You blurt out as you near Sam’s home. “It. . . It must have been terrible to find out like that.”

Her face is unreadable as she looks ahead. “I hadn’t heard from her in months. But. . . Now I know. Letizia’s death wasn’t for nothing if Xiomara was finally killed.”

“You mentioned Xiomara had killed others like you.” Fretting about how your question would sound, you take a deep breath. “Why was she hunting them?”

“Creatures like Xiomara only get stronger by consuming the flesh of those like you and I. We’re not corrupted like her, still have a piece of humanity in us. Yet we have a foot in her realm.” Her voice is even and strong when she reminisces about Letizia. "And Letizia was definitely powerful enough to give Xiomara whatever extra strength she sought. My sister left our home in Puerto Rico partly because she didn't want Xiomara to attack either myself or other members of our family. She drew her away knowing that it might lead to her own death."

The lilting howl of a wolf makes Evita stop in her tracks, eyes widening as she swivels her head this way and that. It was close. You couldn't tell whose howl it was but the ones patrolling that night were Jacob, Brady and Jared. At the mouth of Sam's driveway, you reassure Evita that it was nothing to worry about but it did little to soothe her. Especially when the bulky figure of Jared, the dark gray fur that was around his eyes like a mask gave him away.

Evita says something in Spanish while slipping her hand into her pocket. You stop her with a hand on her shoulder. Alarmed green eyes stare at you like you were the crazy one. Simply shaking your head, you explain "He's a friend." Then turning to Jared, you call out to him. His ears perk up as he makes his way warily to you and Evita. The witch prickles at the proximity of him. You could see Jared's nose twitching at her strong, yet pleasant scent. "He's my pack brother."

"So you're a wolf too." She easily fits the pieces together. Two other howls erupt in the night, calling to Jared and seemingly asking him if all was well.

The commotion has Sam turning on his porch light before his front door opens and he steps out. "Sorry for coming back so late."

"You brought a friend."

"This is Evita." you proceed with introductions and level your gaze with Sam's. "Letizia's sister. The witch who was murdered by that bird monster." Jared flicks his ears back when you mentioned the creature that had immobilized his alpha. Something so terrifying that it even caused Sam traumatic nightmares. Sometimes through the pack telepathy, there would be slivers that appeared every so often. A peek to what you and Sam had experienced in that house.

Sam welcomes the two of you inside.

Evita would stay at Sam’s for when Evita had sat down on Sam’s well worn couch, true exhaustion settled onto her features that told of her tiring journey. Who knew how long she had been traveling prior to her stop in La Push. Emily had been the one to offer the house immediately, taking pity on the young girl she observed before her. Sam didn’t object and once Evita was settled in, he walked you back home. Since she was insisting on paying them back in some way for at least causing the end of Xiomara, Sam said that he would her payment in the form of her showing up if the Volturi did come.

Evita surprisingly knew who the Volturi were. What they were. A traveling witch in her town had stayed with her family and told them a story of the wicked vampire government that took shelter in the underworld of Italy. They feasted on unsuspecting tourists. Luckily for the traveler, they had known what vampires looked like and immediately got out of the tourist group that were being led away like lambs to slaughter.

The story made both your stomach and Sam’s flop as it showed in your concerned faces to one another.

She agreed to help where she could if the time came to prevent any unnecessary blood shed. There were protection wards against such vile things like the Volturi. The humans could be protected if a catastrophe occurred. The one downside was the time it required to put together such a protective charm that would encase Forks. And it was just a lone witch there to weave such a intricate spell.

Instead making the walk back for another time, Sam drove you home. You dozed gently against the passenger side window; content with the warmth of his heater warming the tension out of your frame.

There was a thought, however, that both you and Sam shared. Only he was the brave one to say it out loud “Witches and owl monsters. . . What other dangerous monsters are there in the world?”

Immediately your eyes flick open, millions of spiders crawled underneath your skin when you brought them to life in your mind. Remembering old stories that your grandma had told you. Like that of the wendigo or even those of sea monsters that lurked in the ocean water.

They could be real and out there.

What if, like your own wolf transformation, the resurgence of vampires could snap something in the supernatural world. Lure other, more terrifying beings to your area. It was entirely possible. Like called to like.

They would need more allies, and not just the vampiric kind. They would need allies of all types.

“Will the fighting ever end?” You asked him while anxiously clutching at your seatbelt strap. Suddenly it felt too tight against your chest.

“Not for us.” He replied sadly to you.

Those three simple words stayed with you even by the time you got home and slipped into your bed. Sleep, thankfully, was fast in claiming your senses and sweeping you in a reassuring embrace.

The morning, however, had not been as pleasant since you got a ping on your phone. An incoming text from Sam simply read:“Meeting in 2 hrs.”

Your body clung desperately to your mattress, wanting to ignore the other chimes coming from your pack mates in response. There was no use in refusing the call of your alpha, even if it was through your cellphone. And you knew it was of great importance. Carmen and Eleazor would be introducing themselves as well as Evita. Would the vampires be able to detect that she was not human? You had not scented her at first. Didn’t know what you were smelling when you inhaled a lungful of warm spices.

Eventually you manage to roll out of bed and once out of your jammies, you were making the oh-so-similar walk to Sam’s.

Down the street you could already hear the voices of your pack siblings. You check your phone to verify the time.

“You’re a real witch?”

Evita’s voice laughed, friendly and sweet. Whatever stress you had been experiencing vanishes when you make it to Sam’s home. Only Sam, Evita, Jared, Paul and Embry were occupying the porch. Embry’s back was to you as he was sitting on the railing, but you knew his voice.

Sam was leaning against the front door with his arms crossed in front of his chest. He was smiling at Paul who was in the middle of asking Evita to do a spell when your presence was revealed.

Behind you quickly came up Bradley and Collin run up. Caught up on well deserved rest, Evita had a warm personality. Inviting to everyone and seemingly oblivious to Leah’s sour face when she showed up with Seth who excitedly joined the rest of your pack to give Evita his own questions.

The entirety of the pack was expected to show up before Sam was to text the Cullens. Your trio was missing, talking their time probably due to Jacob being quite difficult to wake up. you had learned the hard way when it was your turn to get him up for his shift for patrol.

Thankfully, the rest of the pack didn’t mind as it gave them more time to get to know Evita.

She was sharing stories from her childhood, of the creatures she encountered as a young girl, when they finally appeared.

The moment Jacob caught sight of Evita, somehow you all knew. While not in furs, you all felt the sudden shift in the air. How air was ripped from everyone’s lungs when bearing witness to Jacob who stopped right in his tracks. Jacob who wordlessly opened his mouth and seemed to stumble forward.

You knew.

Sam knew.

Jared knew.

The three of you having experienced the same earth shattering realization: you had imprinted on someone.

Everyone else seemed to understand what it was that they had watched. Except for Evita who merely frowned at the abrupt change in the wolves around her.

Sam was at a loss. His phone had been in his hands when he spotted Jacob, Embry and Quil. But. . . When it happened, Sam’s attention had been entirely ripped from his phone. Should he address this situation first? No, he merely shook his head at a still awe-struck Jacob and thankfully Quil and Embry understood the gesture. They ushered Jacob forward, whispering to him that it was to be dealt with later while Sam finally punched in the number of the Cullens.

One situation at a time.

No one there though could resist glancing at Jacob and slyly turning to Evita. She still seemed to not understand what had happened. You could only imagine what Jacob was going through though. When you first found out that Edward was your imprintee, you were restricted to silence. Well, until you phased into your furs. Then everyone knew, whether you wanted them to or not.

Time hardly seemed to pass when the Cullens finally showed up with two extra vampires in tow. Perhaps you would consider it a blessing that their speed was astronomically fast.

Minds having immediately been read by Edward, you saw the way his face twitched in indication that he knew as well.

“Thank you for welcoming us into your territory.” Eleazor pleasantly says, stepping forward with his mate’s hand in his. Curious gold beams slide from one member of the pack to the other, taking in everyone and possibly trying to hide the fact that your wolf smell was strong to her. When the vampires finally realized Evita’s presence though, Sam takes it upon himself to explain who she was. Evita expressed her gratitude for Edward, Emmett, and Jasper; the three who had actually avenged her sister.

You and Edward in synchronicity look to each other. Magnets drawing you up together. You should have been paying attention to the words being exchanged between your alpha and the Denalis. Ears strained to tune in but the palpitations of your heart were too loud and you felt like it drowned out any and all voices. Edward holds your gaze with gentle firmness. You couldn’t explain the expression you real in his eyes. It was something you had never seen on him that was directed at you. But you had seen it on someone else before. Embry had looked the same way at you before he kissed you.

Did you dare entertain the idea that. . . That Edward could really return your affections? The possibility of being wrong was high. You wouldn’t get your hopes up.

You had decided last night that once you got the chance, you would ask Evita on a bond breaking spell. Nothing good would prosper from you and Edward being together. If he and Bella got back together, then no one would have to worry about the Volturi.

You would set things right.

**

Carmen and Eleazor were being ushered back to the house by Esme and Carlisle. His adoptive siblings followed them in suit, unaware that he was not close behind. The meeting had gone smooth despite the inner turmoil the pack was experiencing.

He lingered behind, Sam had his back turned to Edward as he beckoned to Jacob to follow him inside of his house. The order was given for the pack to disband but of course there were those who stayed, having their curiosity get the best of them.

Jacob had imprinted on the witch Evita.

From his experience with (y/n), he knew how terrible it would be when Evita was told what had transpired right under her nose. If Evita were to reject him and refuse to acknowledge the imprintation, Jacob would be destroyed.

(y/n) noticed him staring, as she must have during everyone talking in the meeting. Her body lurched forward an inch before she reeled herself back in with great self-control. Instead, determination sizzled in her eyes as she tapped Evita on the shoulder and gestured toward a thicket of trees.

“I wonder what she wants to talk to me about.”

Edward wanted the answer to that ponder as well. Instead of tethering his own mind to Evita’s inner thoughts, Edward merely shook his head and cast Sam’s house one last glance before making the trek back to his own dominion. He wouldn’t intrude on (y/n)’s privacy. She wouldn’t appreciate it.

**

You figure you could kill two birds with one stone: give Sam and Jacob some privacy while also discussing with Evita the possibility of a spell. If there was a chance then not only could you use it, but she could as well. It wasn’t fair to her, this imprinting. Not when she had just shown up late last night after discovering that her sister was dead. She had been through enough strife to last her a lifetime.

“Do you remember the reason why I went to your sister’s in the first place?”

The levity that had been shining in her eyes dimmed when she nods her head. “I do. Edward, right?”

“Well, I still want a spell like that. Or to know if it’s even possible.” You look away from her, anywhere but at her face. “This imprinting thing. . . None of us have control of it. It’s caused so many problems.”

She contemplates what you had said. “Of course it’s possible to sever the bond between people. But that’s with normal people. I don’t know if it would have any affects on you. Something else holds rule in controlling your lives.”

With honesty in your voice you say “I’m willing to try anything. Anything. This could stop the Volturi from even stepping foot in Forks. There would be no need for fighting.”

“Then I will try.” Putting forward another brights smile, both you and Evita jump at the ringing of her own mobile phone. She checks the screen before her grin returned. “It’s my grandmother.”

You leave her to answer the call and decide to check on Quil, Embry and Seth who loitered in Sam’s lot. “Are they done talking yet?”

Quil shook his head. “Not yet. Jared and Paul are also inside just to monitor Jacob. Make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid.”

“At least he won’t be obsessed with Bella anymore.” Seth muses simply to himself but everyone agreed with it. No one could stand Jacob mooning over her, especially when she made it clear time and time again that she was not interested in him.

“Not if Evita doesn’t accept him.” Embry reminds him. “She hardly knows him. And what if she has someone else back home? It would be-” He cuts himself off. You knew what he was going to say thought. It would be just like your situation with Edward. They had heard enough of your heart’s mournful moans.

All of you perk when the front door finally opens back up and Jacob is walking through the threshold, his head bowed as he hastily left down Sam’s driveway. The other three boys tell you goodbye before chasing after him.

You remember in those first few moments after you realized who you had imprinted on that all you wanted was to be alone.

You knew the journey Jacob would have to take to come to terms with this new life changing circumstance was going to be a difficult one.

——————————

TAGLIST: @saltedcoffeescotch , @dangerouslittlefairy , @burn-crash-rqmance , @casedoina , @avadakadabra93 , @daryldixonstorm , @blue-aconite , @xanniestired666 , @esposadomd, @godinho11 , @arin-swear-rose , @alexizodd , @melaninsugarbaby , @lyeatoalinatoheaven  , @ronwownsme , @itsmytimetoodream , @afro-hispwriter , @mutandis-extremis993 , @hxgemxscles , @nightly-polaris , @corrodedcoffins-slut , @ellesalazar , @itgetzweird08 , @crybabyatthediscooffandoms , @sassyandclassyx , @scarlet2007 , @theroyalbrownbarbie , @jennyamanda8 , @stevenandmarcslove , @biancaindaeyo , @loversjoy , @turningtoclown , @vixorell , @xxthackerybinxxx , @daredevilonmyheels

[mulling-over-milgram]

My current Remi theories

Agghhh I’m very late….but here we go ^^;

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TIMELINE SPECULATION

Okay so first of all again starting with a timeline. Now Remi’s recordings seem like they could be over the course of multiple years? So since as far as I’m aware we don’t know what year tsumigram takes place I’m going to be referring to the first paragraph of recording one as year 0001 and then if I believe the year changes 0002 so on and so forth so keep in mind I’m not actually referring to the real life years 0001 , 0002 , 0003 ect ect.

“Summer is ending. Let's stop already, how long are we going to chew on this cold food?” End of august

“Spring is ending. We part and come back together, this must be a form of true love for you; though as for me, I'm not so sure.” End of may

“Winter is ending. Closeness never matters; they switch their opinions in an instant, and always, always, always, always choose someone else instead.” End of February

“Autumn is ending This was a game of play-pretending for everyone but me; right, I wanted a place I and others could belong to, but as I've seen through lies, I'm burning down the theatre..” November/December

“Summer is ending. You simply disappeared without a word; I didn't care, did I care? Too many people, I get lost.” End of August again

Now there are two interpretations since the memories from this recording if my research is correct :

-1) the memories take place over the corse of five years which explains why we start in august the 8th month of the year and then go to the 5th , 2nd , 11/12th and finally back to 8th assuming the recordings are chronological then this is the only answer that really makes sense

-2) the alternative would be that the paragraphs are in reverse order so then you’d go 2>5>8>11/12>8

but I personally lean more towards them being in chronological order because there feels like a progression. In paragraph one Remi asks the other why they are still in this relationship? The relationship to borrow Remi’s metaphor had gone cold then in the next paragraph they seem to be on better terms but still not great then 3 we are back to the relationship being strained and getting worse…it won’t make alot of sense for us to start with “you simply disappeared” and end with “how long are we going to chew on this cold food? = how long are we going to prolong this dying relationship?

The only thing really giving me pause is that its such a long time. 5 years! Remi is 18 thats just under 1/3 of her life time…it makes me feel like I’ve made some mistake in my research….

moving onto the second memory

“Year by year, I look back and feel all the same, let me out of this, let me out of this loop! I wonder what kind of person I used to be before. Is it your fault? Changing me so much. Cherry blossom petals, a wave of crystal water covering my ankles, tender girly laughs from all sides.” CHERRY BLOSSOM’S SAVE THE TIME LINE YET AGAIN :D because cherry blossoms were blooming that places this paragraph around late March and early April.

“Ah, my first ever wish made on New Year night was to meet a true friend. I imagined my own friends, and this is how I became a writer, slowly but surely. I met real friends to grow up with, slowly but surely, but all of them were condescending, and I got trapped in a small box of expectations. “ because its new years eve December 31st

“Warm snowflakes falling from the night sky, the stars are never seen in the city; I watch myself looking up from the sidelines, holding onto the lantern as my last hope.” Now personally I interpret the warm snow flakes line as describing the stars rather than actual snowflakes as warm snowflakes is a contradicting description and the fact the next line literally talks about the stars with that in mind the lantern is the only clue as to wear to place the memory now I’m not fully sure on this but the main Japanese lantern related thing I could find was Toro Nagashi now I’m a little iffy on this since from my research Toro nagashi is mostly about the dead and guiding dead souls but I did see a few places mention wishes “Toro Nagashi is a summer tradition in which people make wishes and float paper lanterns down a river” again I’m really not sure about this but its the best connection I could find so far…this slots (assuming the toro nahashi connection is correct) this memory at the 13th - 16th of August or July.

“Running through a chilly meadow, sun rising and I hold your hand, catching lavender clouds as I stay at home.” Chilly = cold // cold = autumn? September December???

“You're squeezing something heavy with your hands, water covering your eyes, so you can't see what's there; sun’s warmth is on your back, a chill feeling spreading over the body.” Warmth = summer???

I’m quite shaky on alot of the conclusions but my overall interpretation of the time line is.

The trial starts possibly some time in December due to 003’s birthday being soon after T1 starts???

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆ ₊°༺❤︎༻°₊ ｡｡ ₊°༺❤︎༻°₊ ｡｡ ₊°༺❤︎༻°₊ ｡༻ੈ✩‧₊˚₊

FULL TIMELINE THEORY

0001 / august / ?? Summer is ending. Let's stop already, how long are we going to chew on this cold food?”

0002 / march / April / ??

“Year by year, I look back and feel all the same, let me out of this, let me out of this loop! I wonder what kind of person I used to be before. Is it your fault? Changing me so much. Cherry blossom petals, a wave of crystal water covering my ankles, tender girly laughs from all sides.”

0002 / may / ?? “Spring is ending. We part and come back together, this must be a form of true love for you; though as for me, I'm not so sure.”

0003 / February / ??

“Winter is ending. Closeness never matters; they switch their opinions in an instant, and always, always, always, always choose someone else instead.”

0003 / December / 31st

“Ah, my first ever wish made on New Year night was to meet a true friend. I imagined my own friends, and this is how I became a writer, slowly but surely. I met real friends to grow up with, slowly but surely, but all of them were condescending, and I got trapped in a small box of expectations. “

0004 / August / ??

“Warm snowflakes falling from the night sky, the stars are never seen in the city; I watch myself looking up from the sidelines, holding onto the lantern as my last hope.”

0004 / September / ??

“Running through a chilly meadow, sun rising and I hold your hand, catching lavender clouds as I stay at home.”

0004 / december / ??

“Autumn is ending This was a game of play-pretending for everyone but me; right, I wanted a place I and others could belong to, but as I've seen through lies, I'm burning down the theatre..”

0005 / august / ??

“Summer is ending. You simply disappeared without a word; I didn't care, did I care? Too many people, I get lost.”

0005 / August / ??

“You're squeezing something heavy with your hands, water covering your eyes, so you can't see what's there; sun’s warmth is on your back, a chill feeling spreading over the body”

0005 / December / ??

milgram

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THOUGHTS ON HER CRIME

Now moving on to what I think remi’s crime is…..I have not idea! That is the reason why this is so late because I am completely lost on what it could be :)

clearly remi was in some sort of unfulfilling relationship were she felt she was giving more then taking , felt neglected and like it was dying for a long while before it actually ended. So her victim is probably that person?

as for the description

“You're squeezing something heavy with your hands, water covering your eyes, so you can't see what's there; sun’s warmth is on your back, a chill feeling spreading over the body.

It's not the time to listen to yourself. It's never the time, remember?

Your knees and hands seem to hurt, but you keep on pushing, can't give up — now or never”

ummm it kinda gives me the vibes of drowning? Like keep pushing = keep pushing the head under water??? Water coving her eyes could be because she’s also under water…? But I feel like “something heavy with your hands, water covering your eyes,” thats gotta be tears right? Like yes it could be a large body of water was involved if so probably the one implied here “a wave of crystal water covering my ankles,”

Her murder location does look like a lake surrounded but trees to me? But that could just be the distortion. That what go me started down the whole drowning train of thought.

(Gorgeous diagram I know)

but just overall I don’t have a strong theory (this seems to be a reoccurring theme….)

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆ ₊°༺❤︎༻°₊ ｡｡ ₊°༺❤︎༻°₊ ｡｡ ₊°༺❤︎༻°₊ ｡༻ੈ✩‧₊˚₊

RECORDING/UNDER COVER IMAGES

Once again moving on. Time to tackle these two images , her memory recordings and her undercover.

Starting with the memory recording this is alot more abstract then hotaru’s so I feel like the symbolism in it can be read into more. Remi is in space and I feel like space is probably a metaphor for her relationship. Space is cold and a vacuum you can’t speak or be heard in space (without special equipment and the whole no speaking thing is more that if you open your mouth you die and boil/freeze alive but lets put the logistics to the side for a minute) she is surrounded by other planets (possibly reproductive of the other people like the other people implied by lines like “ tender girly laughs from all sides.” / “I wanted a place I and others could belong to” / always choose someone else instead“ ect) and how planets and other celestial objects go in set orbit going round and around on the same path could be seen as similar to how remi describes the relationship “So tiring. I need to break the cycle.” There’s falling star’s in the bg which could refence wishing stars or possibly the concept of star crossed lovers? Or wishing

I attempted to map the planets from the art to our solar system which again not sure if its ment to be our solar system or just a general space setting but if it is our solar system then perhaps we could read into the fact that in this context remi would be on the outer side of the solar system far away from the sun and in the colder part of the system.

unrelated observations that the shape on the side kinda looks like a wave or maybe thats just my conformation bias talking…?

And this art could also possibly reference a magical girl transformation ??? I feel like I’m reaching to much with those last two points tho…

As for the undecover frame we have already seen remi liken her relationship to food “Let's stop already, how long are we going to chew on this cold food?” So relationship metaphor???

there seems to be strawberries in the picture which according to google in japan has symbolism of love and is a gift on valentines day in japan….? it is also apparently a symbol of the goddess Venus which links it back in with space but idk

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆ ₊°༺❤︎༻°₊ ｡｡ ₊°༺❤︎༻°₊ ｡｡ ₊°༺❤︎༻°₊ ｡༻ੈ✩‧₊˚₊

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS ON VOTING

I really don’t feel like I know enough to vote her anything….? I went with victim in the end because I didn’t really feel like I had any strong concussion on her situation but I feel like I gotta be missing something cuz it was 50% predator when I originally wrote this section.

[kitty-on-the-brink]

Dear world. Dear those who have the power to stop this. Dear people who could make a change but won’t

By the time you get this it will be too late

For days upon end this month fires have raged and burned, yet you say ‘it’s not that bad! The smoke is fine to breathe’, and you continue to heal the promises you made as you dig another oil line.

This week has started for me with a heat wave, sweat dribbling down my legs, and an itchy nose from all the polen. Storms have been raging on the evenings, and as much as I like storms -for they are very calming- I can’t help but think that the storm’s usually come after the summer, not right at the beginning. Or just before, even, in spring. But no, here are the storms and the heat waves in June.

It wasn’t this warm this time last year, or the year before, or the year before that. Or any year I can remember in fact. We had to switch out our winter duvets for the summer ones much sooner this year, and already I don’t want to have a blanket on my bed at all. I hate the sounds of the plug in fans whirring through the night; this country doesn’t come with air-con in the houses, just some fancy schools and offices for rich workers ran by richer people. I bet they have air-con in parliament, where they sit and discuss the rising temperatures, melting ice caps, and never seem to really do anything about it.

Did you know that just stop oil disrupted a flower festival last week? I wouldn’t choose that particular place myself, but it’s admirable work when the government won’t listen any other way, and the news will not report the legal non-disruptive work. And yet my friend, who was writing a book about climate change when we were eleven, still called them the morons. Funny that.

I feel guilty, every time I have a tuna sandwich or get driven down into town when I could have walked. I really shouldn’t. And yet rich people who could speak out and make a difference take half an hour trips on private jets and feel no remorse. It saves them time and convenience. And they eat rare caviar. Big oil and fossil fuel companies that destroy habitats and pump out atmosphere destroying gasses only care about the money they receive and not the impact that what they are doing has. They don’t care that a rare species of bird just went extinct. That a polar bear cub didn’t make it out of its first weeks after I near starved then drowned due to their not being enough ice or food around.

Dear people, while you sit back and watch this happen, just know that you will be dead before this get too bad, and I’ll be left to pick up your mess. I’d not want to go into politics. I want to act or dig up segments of the past and marvel over what happened. But I might just need to take a seat at that table to get things to go right.

[sad0nion]

I 100%ED STARDEW VALLEY WOOOOOO

I FINALLY DID IT!!!!!

holy shit i'm so happy. the ending at the summit almost made me cry. anyway look at my farm and stuff:

my farm, post perfection, Summer 20 year 4

my house. took this screen shot in like spring year 4 but nothing really changed. yes i chose Alex i was using a platonic relationships mod so he got his own room. he was my bestie and would sometimes give me pancakes

bat cave :3

island farm. didn't do much decorating wise, but i really love the path i made from the parrot express to the main farm

aaaaaand the ginger island house! decorating this one was super fun

final play time came in at: 182 hours 53 minutes

the only mods i used that changed game play other than platonic relationships and platonic partners and friends were:

CJB cheats menu, which i mainly used so i could walk slightly faster(i've done my time) and to pause time while i was fiddling with the furniture and stuff.

Ellie's ideal greenhouse(modest), because it Just Works Better

for visuals, i used:

seasonal outfits

DaisyNiko's earthy recolor

DaisyNiko's earthy interiors

DaisyNiko's earthy interface

Elle's Seasonal Buildings

it was a lot of fun to go for 100%, and i got like... 10+ new achievements along the way. got pretty tedious once i was just saving up the 10 mil for the clock, but still found a way to make it fun. i'm so glad i did this because any time i would play with mods like SVE i'd feel like i was missing out on the original late game content or something. but now i've DONE IT ALL HELL YEAH

anyway i'm never doing that again. now i'm going to go change up my mods and get crazy with it. maybe continue SVE, maybe try the ridgeside village mod, who knows? :)

[pairofsunflowers]

on the morning we were leaving the place our shakespeare through performance class performed Henry V for the last time, we were all saying our tearful goodbyes and my professor/director hugged me and tearfully said i was the heart and soul of the play (which made me even more choked up than i already was) and that maybe the reason they didn't take me last year (it's a relatively small class you have to apply and interview for to get in, and i'd applied and interviewed last year and i really really wanted it, but i didn't get it) was because the universe knew that they would need me this year. and i keep thinking about that. that's crazy... and in a way i think he's right. like. okay, for context. the previous professor/director/program coordinator passed away this past september, but he'd still directed the previous spring and summer classes. my mom passed away at the end of october and the application for this year's spring class was due a couple days after she died. i turned in the application apparently a day late (i still maintain i turned it in On the deadline, not past it, but whatever.) but my (future) prof let it slide and squeezed me in and i got to be in the class for the spring semester and it fucking changed my life, i can't hype it up enough. things were obviously hard for me after my mom passed, and i had a breakdown thinking i wouldn't get in the class, and then this semester i got the news an immediate family member of mine was going to be deported. in personal matters, it was the worst year of my life. but this class gave me friends and experiences and a passion that saved me this semester.

Henry V is one of my favorite plays of all time now and I have SUCH an affection for the character of henry and i could Literally talk about him as a character for hours if you let me. I got to star in this play and perform one of the most iconic and well known shakespeare monologues ever (once more unto the breach). and..... if i'd gotten in the spring class last semester....... i probably wouldn't have done it this year. not because you can't take the class again, you absolutely can and it's not uncommon to do so. but because i would have had the (wonderful, lifechanging) experience already, and the professor i would have done it with, james, would have passed only a month before my mom and then my mom died right before applications were due. i probably would have been too broken and depressed and sad to do it, and rationalized it as saying i wouldn't want to do it without james and without my mom to see it and i'd already experienced it once so whatever. it's fine. but because i hadn't gotten it last year, and i still really really wanted to do it, and unfortunately i'd never gotten the pleasure of getting to know james so his passing didn't hurt me emotionally, i just barely fought past the brokenness and depression i did feel after my mom passed to submit an application and i got in.

all this to say i remember feeling really really sad last year that i didn't get in the class. but. in a way, the universe kind of always works out, huh? like idk maybe not but that's what i like to believe for the most part, personally. it's that one pic of the dog begging for boiling water on the stove and the caption was like 'god when he sees what i'm praying for to happen.' if i'd gotten it last year, more likely than not i wouldn't have done it this year, which is almost inconceivable. who the hell would have played henry in act III..... that's MY role. and there's so many people in this year's class that i'm friends with and adore that i wouldn't have gotten to know if i didn't take the class this year. my director called me the heart and soul of the play and gave me so many compliments whenever he gave me notes. and in another world, i was never in Henry V. that's just so crazy! i guess everything works out down the line!

[reikuns-realities]

By Any Other Name - Ominis Gaunt x OC

Chapter one - The New Fifth Year

Alice was now in her fifth year at Hogwarts. Many things had changed. She had grown out her hair. It was her first year back since Athena graduated. She had grown into her own magic, though she still needed some extra help. She had made a few more friends in her year. Poppy Sweeting, Wendy Rosewood, Natsai Onai, to name a few. She found out she had a knack for potions, it was the only way she held her own around Garreth.

Speaking of Garreth, some things had stayed the same. He almost never left her side. He had quickly become her best friend. Best duo in the world, those two. She had easily turned Garreth’s potions interests into a side business for both of them to earn a bit of cash. Enchanted paint was not cheap, you know.

Alice was excited, more than she should’ve been, really. Throughout the train journey and carriage ride to Hogwarts, she overheard talk of someone new. A new student. Someone who got their Hogwarts letter late in life. A new fifth year. It wasn’t everyday Hogwarts got itself a new student. A transfer, maybe, but someone new? New to magic? Starting in their fifth year? She was dying to meet them.

The sorting ceremony was long and boring, as it usually was. Alice was happy with the new Gryffindor first years, but her eyes searched for that new fifth year.

“They’re not here yet,” Garreth stated, digging into his roast.

“Maybe they are late,” Natsai Onai offered.

“Haven’t seen Professor Fig yet either,” Alice stated, stretching her torso to try and peek over the heads of her fellow students. “They’ve been studying under him, right? That’s what I’ve heard.”

“That’s right-“

Just as Natty replied, the heavy doors of the Great Hall were pushed open. The gray tufts of Professor Fig’s hair, their magic theory professor, emerged from the doors before retreating back. Slight murmuring was heard outside the doors, as the Great Hall hushed to a disturbing silence. Professor Black, the Headmaster of the school, looked annoyed as all hell as he marched right to the doors, likely to give the magic theory professor a piece of his mind. A piece of Professor Black’s mind wouldn’t be enough to save anyone, Alice was afraid to say. He was never known for being a bright mind.

Soon, Professor Black waltzed right back into the Great Hall, a new face following him up to the front of the hall. The new face. The one everyone was talking about. She had soft features. She stood about 5’3, her face full of small cuts, her brown hair disheveled, a couple twigs in it. She looked like she had just escaped an adventure with nothing but the meat on their bones. The girl’s piercing blue eyes scanned the room in awe.

“Professor Weasley,” Black’s voice sounded bored and uninterested as he led the new fifth year up the stairs to the stool. “We’ve one more to be sorted…”

“Welcome!” Weasley’s soft, welcoming voice seemed to calm the new fifth year. “You’re just in time, have a seat.”

The fifth year did as instructed, awkwardly sitting on the stool. Weasley placed the sorting hat on her head. The hall erupted in whispers, echoing on the walls, desperate to theorize on which house would get the late bloomer.

“Hmmm better be GRYFFINDOR!” The sorting hat declared.

Alice cheered loudly along with her house as Weasley transfigured the fifth year’s robes into the signature shade of red.

“And one more thing, due to the unfortunate injury on the pitch during last spring’s final, this year’s quidditch season has been canceled,” Black uttered, a roar of disappointment erupted from each table.

“That’s rubbish!” Alice shouted. She was Gryffindor’s seeker, after all.

“Enough!” Black ordered. “It’s not as if I’ve banned flying altogether. But, don’t. Tempt me. You are here to focus on your academic futures. I’m sure you all have plenty to do before classes begin tomorrow…”

Black paused, watching as no one made a move.

“I said, I’m sure you all have plenty to do before classes begin tomorrow!”

Alice rolled her eyes as Garreth quickly slid from his seat and gestured for her to do the same. She reluctantly followed, glaring at Black. It seemed as though this year would be quite interesting.

The first shower back at Hogwarts was comforting as usual, something about the water here felt more safe than anything she had experienced back home. She trudged up the stairs to the girls’ dormitory. This year, Alice had lucked out and got assigned a dorm that was isolated from the others, the downside was that it was also the highest one.

So.

Many.

Steps.

She pushed the door open, making her way to her own bed.

“Hello.”

Alice screamed, leaping just a tad off the ground. She whipped her head to the bed on the opposite end of the dorm. There sat the new fifth year.

“Sorry, I didn’t think I was getting a roommate this year,” Alice flattened her nightgown. “You weren’t here when I left.”

“No, no,” The brunette waved it off. She stood from the bed and walked over to the slightly shorter girl. “Don’t apologize, I’m Katherine Blake.”

“Alice Morgan,” Alice shook her hand. “It’s so nice to finally meet you! You’ve been the talk of the town all day! Everyone was talking about you on the Hogwarts Express.”

Katherine looked a bit upset at the mention of earlier today, but she shook her head.

“I’m no one special, really,” She replied. “I’m just happy to be here and learn a bit of magic.”

“You’ll certainly have a lot of catching up to do,” Alice grinned, pointing to herself. “But stick with me. Not that I could help you much, I just want more friends.”

“I’ll keep that in mind, Alice,” Katherine chuckled.

“We better get some rest,” Alice stated, walking back to her own bed. “Big day tomorrow. If you need help finding your classes, just give me a holler. I’m usually around.”

Alice got up rather early in the mornings. The Great Hall would start serving breakfast around 5 am, but Alice rarely ate there. Through the years, Alice had come to find that the little Slytherin trio enjoyed their breakfast in the quad courtyard. Of course, now with Anne’s unfortunate curse, Sebastian and Ominis sat alone that morning. As Alice passed them with her own breakfast, a few breakfast rolls made into little sandwiches, she took notice of their appearances.

Sebastian had his nose in a book. He was one to eat a heavy breakfast. Lots of protein to keep his strength up. He loved a good over easy egg and potatoes to balance out the sausage links on his plate. He was spouting some nonsense about dark magic that Ominis was not too keen on listening to. Ominis was enjoying a rather crisp apple, smiling at the breeze of early fall. Alice fawned at the sight of him.

He was the reason she enjoyed her breakfast in the Quad Courtyard. It had been 4 years since she had met him and their relationship had not progressed since then. She was friendly with Sebastian, everyone was. Sebastian was quite the popular Slytherin. But Ominis never gave Alice the time of day.

Sebastian gave a gentle wave once he noticed Alice staring. Alice appreciated Sebastian’s friendly gesture as opposed to his friend’s cold shoulder. She waved back, though he wasn’t the one she was staring at, she was grateful she could at least call Sebastian Sallow a friend.

She sat on the bench on the opposite side of them. Sebastian had told her once before that he had come to enjoy her presence every morning. He knew that she had feelings for his best friend, but Alice assumed he didn’t care too much about it.

“Alice,” Sebastian spoke, waving her over.

Did she hear that correctly? Was she seeing that correctly? Never in the past few years did Sebastian ever talk to her during these morning hours. Was she going mad?

“C’mon.”

Alice gathered her things and raced over the short distance to their bench. Ominis scoffed at the sound of her irregular strides.

“We don’t need a third opinion, let alone from a Gryffindor.”

“Ominis doesn’t believe the dark arts should be taught in class,” Sebastian started, closing his book. “But I believe the only way to properly defend against the dark arts is learning what you’re up against.”

“Oh, please, Sebastian,” Ominis scoffed once more. “You chose a lion because she would be more inclined to agree with you.”

“Sebastian…” Alice frowned. “Those curses have plagued Ominis his entire life. Seeing that you’re his best friend, I find it hard to believe you’d willingly bring him into a conversation like this. Don’t you think there’s danger in knowing? It takes a toll on you, mentally and emotionally. Ominis is a blatant example of that.”

“You can’t expect-“

“I don’t want to hear it, Sebastian. Alice is right,” Ominis spoke with a small smile. “I’m pleasantly surprised…”

Alice was in shock. Very rarely did Ominis even acknowledge her, let alone say that she was right. In the past 4 years, Ominis had shown very little interest in Alice. In fact he showed what she could only assume was more of a disdain towards her, if she were being honest. Snarky comments, irritated statements, nasty remarks. The whole nine. No interaction lasted more than a sentence or two. Despite what he did to her face, Alice admired the man he was beyond that. She saw his potential for success, his passion for magic, his loyalty to his friends. She admired him from afar for all those years. He was her muse.

And now he had just agreed with her for the first time.

Charms was definitely not Alice’s strong suit. Not a lot of subjects were. She struggled with attention most of all. She would typically doodle during class or zone out completely. Today was no different. She had told herself that this year would be, she would apply herself and get better grades, learn more. Yet here she was, on the very first day, in her very first class, staring at her muse once more. He stood, his foot on the bench, conversing with his best friend about, well Alice couldn’t be bothered to know. She couldn’t hear them from where she sat. Sebastian had a rather large book, resting wide open on his desk, he was rather enthusiastically explaining something from it to Ominis. Ominis, however, did not agree.

Ominis closed Sebastian’s book and tucked it under his arm.

“Hey, wait-“ Sebastian started. “Give it back”

“No. Keep your nose out of this type of magic.”

Alice took this time to observe the class beyond Ominis Gaunt. She noticed that her roommate sat in front of her, next to Natsai Onai.

“Hello, roommate!” Alice cheerfully greeted, leaning over her own desk. Katherine turned around slightly and gave a little wave.

“Do either of you know what we are working on?” Katherine asked Natty and Alice. Natty slid her textbook closer to Katherine in response.

“I don’t know how much help it will be, but I am sure you’ll catch up in no time,” she smiled.

“I don’t really pay much attention in class,” Alice confessed, to which Katherine let out a laugh.

“Perhaps we both need to go through this book.”

“Would you like a drawing?” Alice asked, tearing her newest drawing of Ominis from her roll of parchment. She handed the piece of parchment to Katherine with a contented smile.

“Oh, thank you,” Katherine responded, taken aback by the gesture but took the parchment anyway. She glanced at it for a moment before furrowing her eyebrows. “Isn’t this…”

“You’d be correct,” Natty nodded. “He’s where her focus is most of the day.”

“I do not approve,” Garreth stated, his gaze fixed on Ominis who was rather loudly arguing with Sebastian.

“I wouldn’t say most of the day…” Alice grinned.

“You don’t approve of the drawing?” Katherine questioned, then turned to Alice. “This is a very good drawing. You’re talented, Alice.”

“Thank you,” Alice smiled, touched by the compliment.

“Don’t give others your drawings of Ominis, it’s awkward for them…” Garreth explained, hoping he got through to her. He didn’t.

Just then, Professor Ronen strolled in with a spark of dramatics. He was a rather eccentric fellow and he always seemed to be able to brighten the mood in his classroom. He clapped twice, gaining the attention of the entire class.

“Students! If you could all take your seats, please, we can get started, yes?”

A bit of shuffling was heard as the few who had still yet to take their seats, did so.

“Now, then! I know it’s been a long summer, but does anyone remember what we were working on last year?” Professor Ronen scanned over his silent students, studying their expressions. “Anyone?”

Alice had begun to draw another sketch of Ominis. This one showcased his bored expression as he sat on the other side of the classroom. Garreth swiftly plucked her pencil out of her fingers, putting it behind his ear. She stared at him in disbelief to which he grinned back.

Ever since Garreth had met Alice that fateful day during first year he had been rather protective of her. He had noticed in the beginning how small and reserved she could be. Garreth was nothing of the sort. He was loud and obnoxious. Through the years he had seen that side of Alice bloom within her. He was proud of his impact on his best friend. He loved watching her grow, blossom into a complex and full version of herself. What he didn’t love, however, was her fixation on a certain pale skinned Slytherin.

Garreth knew Ominis. He was acquainted with him, sometimes he would ask for a bit of potions help here and there. Garreth knew Ominis did not share his family’s beliefs on blood status, nor on the dark arts. In many ways he would be the perfect suitor for his little Alice in Wonderland. If he wasn’t such a prick. Garreth didn’t dislike Ominis because of his name, nor because of his disability. Garreth disliked Ominis because of how he treated his Alice. Garreth loved Alice, whether it was a platonic love or romantic, he wasn’t sure. Nevertheless, he kept her safe and loved.

Katherine flipped through the pages of Natty’s textbook as Ronen spoke. Ronen took notice of this, skillfully casting Accio on the book itself.

“Ah- ah, last minute studies will not make up for what should have happened over months.”

“Professor, I’m-“

“I think we could all use a bit of a refresher, shall we?” Ronen projected, motioning for his students to rise from their seats. “Everyone, stand up!”

A couple groans here and there were sounded from disgruntled students as they complied with Ronan’s orders.

“Now, stand across from your partners, we’ll be going over the spell ‘Accio.’ Who remembers what the spell ‘Accio’ does?”

“Accio is used to draw any object to you,” Imelda said with a smug look on her face.

“Correct, Miss Reyes! Follow along with my wand movements,” Ronen proceeded to lead everyone through casting the spell.

The book rested in Garreth’s large palm. Alice narrowed her eyes to it. She took a deep breath, remembering the wand movements.

“Accio!” She shouted, her wand letting out a hot spark. She winced.

“It’s alright, Alice,” Garreth spoke, reassuring her. “You’ll get it, try one more time.”

“Accio!” Alice’s voice boomed again, this time with more strength. Before her eyes, the book flew out of Garreth’s palm and right into her arms. She jumped in excitement, hugging it to her chest. Garreth laughed loudly at her dramatic celebration. “Garreth! I did it!”

After the little victory she had, Alice’s attention once again faded from the task at hand. Sebastian had magically plucked his dark arts book from Ominis’ pale hands. He grasped it firmly with a smirk. Alice found herself drawing closer to the pair as her own book flew out of her arms. Ominis retaliated by utilizing his own magic, effectively performing the spell on the very same book Sebastian so desperately needed.

“Try that again, Sebastian,” He tucked the book into his bag. “I believe you hit the wrong target.”

“You’re no fun, Ominis,” Sebastian stated, with a smirk.

“I’d argue he’s a lot of fun,” Alice nodded, now right next to Sebastian, who took a step back, a bit startled by her proximity to him.

Garreth quickly took hold of her wrist, pulling her back to their original spot.

Ominis heard their footsteps retreating and raised an eyebrow.

“That was Alice, wasn’t it.” He knew the answer but still he felt the need to ask. His best friend confirmed his suspicion with a simple ‘yes.’ Ominis let out a rather neutral hum in response.

“Excellent! All of you!” Ronen exclaimed, clapping his hands. “I’ve always been under the impression that class should have both a practical, and a fun element to it. Why don’t we head outside?”

The class gathered their things and followed their professor out the door.

“He seems like a nice teacher,” Katherine commented as they walked.

“Most of them are,” Natty replied,. “There are a few to be wary of.”

“I think all the teachers are scary,” Alice stated, with a small smile.

“Really?” Katherine asked, a bit puzzled by the statement. “Even our Charms professor?” Alice nodded.

“There’s a sort of darkness there,” Alice shuddered, earning a bit of laughter from her friends.

“Alice is just a baby,” Imelda smirked. “She startles easily, unlike me.”

“You were the one who was afraid of a pet rat last year,” Ominis stated, a soft chuckle escaping his lips. “I wouldn’t go boasting quite yet.”

“That- do you know how unsanitary a rat is?” Imelda shrilled. “If it was wild, we could’ve all gotten sick.”

“Bite your tongue, Imelda,” Garreth had come to Alice’s aid, as always. “Or I may just have you test my latest concoction.”

“Concoction?” Katherine turned to Alice as Imelda let out a loud huff.

“Garreth and I happen to be the best potion brewers in the school!” Alice winked at her roommate.

“May I interest you in a shrinking potion?” Garreth dug within his robe’s pockets to fish out a couple he had lying around.

“What would I use a shrinking potion for?”

“To shrink, of course,” Alice stated.

“Potions are incredibly helpful to have on hand,” Natty responded. “You never know when you’ll need one for the most obscure of reasons.”

Alice’s attention wavered again, shifting to the Slytherin duo once more. Sebastian sneakily tried performing Accio on the book. This time it was secure in Ominis’ arms. The book flew to Sebastian, as expected, but it had rather cartoonishly dragged Ominis along with it. Though he could not see, he flashed Sebastian a pointed look that could only be described as disapproving. His gaze was judgemental and exhausted. Alice couldn’t help but smile at the small interaction. They continued to captivate her mind as Ronen stopped around the flying class lawn.

Professor Ronen summoned the summoning court board, beckoning everyone to gather around it. Natty, Katherine, Garreth, and Alice stood close to the front of the summoning court. The first three, conversing as Alice took in their surroundings. Everyone had opted to either sit or stand along the sides of the court. Poppy Sweeting sat on the side, she had brought her parchment and was doodling small mooncalves on it. The man next to her was a sight for sore eyes.

Dante Ripley. Alice never cared much for anyone’s looks other than Ominis’, but even she had to admit he was rather ravishing. He had jet black pin straight hair that liked to fall just past his eyes at times. His skin looked pale whilst indoors but out there, it was sun kissed. His eyes seemed cold and unfeeling but when he smiled, they lit up like sparks of ember. His lips were plump and pink, shaped into a forever pout. Dante was a fifth year Slytherin. He had two siblings, a sixth year Gryffindor brother, Augustine, and a third year Slytherin sister, Kaia. Alice had heard the Ripleys were from Korea. Though she never asked, herself. Alice paid it no mind as she noticed his gaze fixated on the new fifth year.

Her eyes stopped as she spotted the Slytherin duo. Ominis had taken a seat on the grass, enjoying an apple. Sebastian was standing, rather fidgety.

“Don’t-“ Garreth tried but to no avail. Alice had already begun her trek to Ominis’ side.

“She really is a fan of his, isn’t she,” Katherine asked, glancing at the remaining group.

“I’ve heard she’s been like this ever since first year,” Natty nodded.

“She’s going to get herself hurt,” Garreth shook his head in disapproval.

She plopped down next to the blonde, she tucked her legs to her chest, smiling softly.

Next to her, Ominis had managed to hold onto the book. He made sure to keep a track on where Sebastian was in relation to him. He heard the soft crunching of grass as a person walked towards him and sat beside him. A faint aroma of a familiar perfume made its way to his nose. Alice.

“I’m going to retrieve it eventually…” Sebastian stated, taking notice of Alice.

“I’ll tell Madam Scribner.”

“You wouldn’t dare.”

“No more forbidden dark magic books for you.”

“I know how to handle her,” Sebastian said with a smug grin. “We have a sort of back and forth.”

Alice watched as Imelda Reyes walked up to Katherine with a smile on her face.

“You’re the new fifth year? That’s not something I ever expected to be saying,” She confidently held her hand out to Katherine. “I’m Imelda Reyes.”

“Hello, I’m Katherine,” She smiled back, shaking her hand. “I heard you say you were good at flying?”

Imelda laughed in response.

“Good? I’m the best. Took care of all the scoreboards around here. It’s a shame quidditch is down this year,” Imelda smirked, smugly. “I’d have gotten Slytherin more than a few house points.”

“I would’ve liked to have given it a shot, too,” Katherine nodded. “At least there’s always next year. They can’t ban quidditch forever.”

“Have you ever flown before?” Imelda asked, giving her a once over.

“No,” Katherine shrugged. “But it can’t be that hard to learn, can it?”

“Flying is a skill. I might have a natural talent, but for normal people, such as yourself, it’s actually quite difficult to learn.”

“I suppose I should get started as soon as I can, then,” Katherine smiled sweetly. “Maybe I’ll be able to work on some of those scoreboards you’ve been talking about.”

“You wish,” Imelda hummed. “If you do pluck up the courage, feel free to send me an owl. I’d be more than happy to take you down a peg.”

Alice’s eye began to twitch at Imelda’s words. Her gaze narrowed at the Slytherin, as Professor Ronen tried to hone in his students’ attentions.

From beside Alice, Ominis had noticed she had not moved. He was puzzled as to why she stayed.

“Wouldn’t you rather be over with the other lions than sitting here on your own?” Ominis asked his attention fully on the Gryffindor beside him.

Alice wondered if she could slip some veritaserum in Imelda’s pumpkin juice tonight, maybe then she would stop her tall tales and boasting. Sebastian leaned in to Ominis, a soft chuckle falling from his lips.

“Your stalker ignored you.”

Ominis frowned, as he snapped his fingers in front of where he assumed was Alice’s gaze. She blinked, her eyes focusing on the beauty mark ridden hand in front of her. She quickly turned in Ominis’ direction, admiring his face.

“Yes?” She asked, sweetly.

“Why are you here when you are clearly engaged in a separate conversation?”

“I want to be here,” Alice stated, letting her legs slide from her grasp as she switched to a more comfortable position to talk to him.

“Your friends are over there,” Ominis deadpanned.

“I consider Sebastian a friend.”

“That’s right,” Sebastian nodded. “I find her presence tolerable.”

“Tolerable,” Ominis repeated, but Alice’s attention had already shifted back to the group of Gryffindors.

Dante Ripley had introduced himself to Katherine and they seemed to have sparked an engaging conversation with each other. That was until Imelda felt the need to butt in.

“Give me a broom, I could’ve taken care of that dragon,” She stated smugly, lifting her chin with pride.

“Have you run into a dragon before, Imelda?” Katherine asked, her voice genuine.

“They’re around,” Imelda shrugged. “It wouldn’t be that hard for me, I assure you.”

“Imelda Reyes!” Alice stood up abruptly, startling Sebastian in the process. “You’d probably get burnt to a crisp. Be respectful, someone died.”

“You don’t know what it was like,” Katherine tried to explain to Imelda.

“I think you’re the one that needs to be taken down a peg. Maybe 50,” Alice stated, visibly fuming.

“I’d like to see you try, little Gryffindor. You’d lose.”

Alice sat back down with a huff, unaware that she had caught the attention of her muse.

“As much as I enjoy getting on the student drama, back to our assignment, if you’d please,” Ronen continued with his lesson as Ominis turned his head in Alice’s direction.

“You don’t usually get involved in arguments…” He stated, a hint of amusement in his voice.

Sebastian saw his opportunity and opted to steal back his book the muggle way. Ominis, having turned his attention fully on the little Gryffindor, failed to notice his best friend’s actions.

“I don’t like it when someone attacks my friends,” Alice explained with her arms crossed.

By this time, Katherine had been called to play summoner’s court against Natty. She was fairing well, already 20 points ahead of Natsai. Alice, however, was not paying much attention to the competition.

“Little Lions need to stick together, is that right?” Ominis asked, a smirk playing on his pink lips.

“What do you really have against Gryffindors?” Alice snapped, her gaze moved swiftly back to the pale Slytherin. “Sometimes, I think it is you who needs to be taken down a peg as well.”

“That’s enough, Alice,” Sebastian spoke, tucking his book under his arm.

“No,” Ominis replied, the smirk never leaving his lips. “It’s rare that we see sweet Alice Morgan all riled up.”

“You’re insufferable-“

“Oh, I’m insufferable?” Ominis laughed. “Oh, lion, please go on. Explain in great detail just how much you hate me. I’ll wait, I’m quite patient.”

“Ominis Gaunt,” She stood up once more as Katherine won her competition. “If you wanted me to leave, you could’ve just said so.”

She sighed, joining her fellow Gryffindors as they started towards the castle. Ominis silently listened to her retreating feet crunching on the grass. He swallowed, gingerly processing the interaction.

“You rarely acknowledge her, what was that?” Sebastian asked, helping Ominis to his feet.

“I was simply bored,” Ominis replied, now fully aware of what Sebastian had done. He quickly took back the book.

Alice was now planning the rest of her day as they walked back to the charms class. Perhaps she could grab something small from the great hall before her next class.

Defense Against the Dark Arts was always a class Alice enjoyed. She enjoyed most classes, though she was not the brightest student, so she tended to get mediocre grades despite being interested in the topic. DADA was nothing different. Professor Hecate was a brilliant professor. She had previously worked in the Ministry of Magic as an Unspeakable. So needless to say, she knew what she was talking about… or not talking about.

After introductions were made and expectations were set, the professor instructed everyone to get up, out of their seats. They were going to have a couple friendly dueling matches to kickstart the new school year.

The first up was Katherine Blake and Sebastian Sallow.

“I won’t hold back,” Sebastian said, smirking. “A friendly duel is always a pleasant introduction.”

“I’ll certainly give it my all,” Katherine replied, shifting her feet to a more comfortable stance.

“Charms and basic attacks only,” Professor Hecate instructed. “A fair duel. Begin.”

Sebastian started, hitting Katherine with a swift basic attack. She took it like a champ, responding with using the spell she had just learned.

“Accio!” Sebastian was pulled forward by her magic as she did so, taking a couple of her basic attacks. He was able to drop back to his feet, glaring at Katherine who grinned in response.

“Depulso!”

“Protego!” A protective sphere appeared around Katherine, deflecting Sebastian’s spell. She swiftly spun. “Stupify!”

With Sebastian stunned, she was able to hit him with enough basic attacks to push him over the edge, effectively winning the duel. Sebastian chuckled from the ground, a smile of admiration taking over his lightly freckled face.

“Quite the match, new fifth year…”

“Right, Mr Gaunt? Miss Morgan?”

Alice blinked in response as Garreth pushed her towards the dueling stand.

“Me, professor?” Alice asked, a bit taken aback.

“Don’t think I don’t know about your extracurriculars, Miss Morgan,” Hecate smirked, knowingly “Now go on.”

Alice gingerly stepped up on the dueling stand, Ominis on the other end, fiddling with his wand.

“I warn you, lion,” Ominis smirked. “I will not hold back.”

“I don’t expect you to, Ominis.”

“Levioso!” Ominis’ spell hit Alice, her feet lifting off the ground. His face showed determination. He was focused on his spell casting, listening for her movements. He hit her with a couple basic attacks before the spell wore off and she went tumbling down to the ground.

“Expelliarmus!”

“Protego! Stupify!” Ominis was not kidding when he said he wouldn’t hold back. A drop of sweet trickled down his forehead. Alice followed it on its descent down his porcelain cheek.

“Flippendo!” Alice’s spell finally hit Ominis, effectively flipping him. He scrambled back to his feet.

“Expelliarmus!” Ominis shot, Alice’s wand flying from her hand. “Depulso!”

Alice flew off the stand, bumping her head on the bookshelf. She rubbed the area, frowning.

Ominis frowned before replacing it with a small smirk.

“I see…” Hecate quietly said. “How disappointing… class dismissed.”

Garreth helped Alice up to her feet. As Ominis walked towards the pair.

“Lion,” he simply said. Alice looked up at him.

“Why did you hold back.”

“I didn’t…” Alice blinked at him as she exchanged a look with Garreth. He nodded, walking towards the door. He opted to stick around, though, waiting by the door.

“You pity me. I don’t need your pity, Alice.”

“I don’t pity you, Ominis,” She replied, shaking her head at him. “I just want you to feel confident in yourself.”

“Next time, if you want me to feel confident, don’t throw the match.” Ominis scoffed. “Duel me fair.”

“But I’d win,” Alice stated, tapping her foot awkwardly.

“You underestimate me.”

“I rank higher than Sallow, Ominis.”

“I don’t want a place that I didn’t earn. Duel me fair or not at all.”

Alice sighed, walking towards him. She reached up. Instinctively, Ominis flinched slightly. She gently patted his cheek twice.

“Then I’ll see you at Crossed Wands,” Alice whispered to him, before walking to Garreth who laughed at Ominis’ expression.

“Did she just- pat my cheek?”

Sebastian chuckled in response, clapping his best mate’s shoulder.

“That, Ominis, is what the general public calls flirting,” Sebastian began roughly massaging his best friend’s shoulders. “Flirt back. Test the waters. You won’t regret it.”

“Clearly, this book has clouded your judgment,” Ominis pulled out his wand and joined his fellow students out the door, Sebastian following behind him.

Perhaps he’d be able to get in some practice on his dueling in the Undercroft. She did give him an official invitation, after all. A small lopsided smile appeared on his face as he thought about finally witnessing Alice’s power first hand.

Alice marched with Garreth down the short hallway to the pink lady’s painting.

“Well if it isn’t my favorite little potions duo,” She gave a gentle smile.

“Good afternoon, Beatrice,” Alice smiled back, glancing at her through her specs. The painting shook her head in response. “Ah, I’ll get your name eventually.”

“I’m sure you will, password?”

“Grata Domum,” Garreth stated, the painting swung open.

Garreth hurriedly ran into the common room. His afternoon would be spent testing out his latest products on unsuspecting first years. Alice followed shortly after. Alice was hoping there would still be enough daylight to do a bit of painting by the fountain.

She climbed those dreaded steps up to her dorm once again, the second day was still just as bad as the first. She pushed open that door, dropping her books at her desk. A small hoot came from beside her bed. A gray owl stood, perched on her footboard, a little letter tucked in its mouth. Alice walked towards it, giving the small owl some much deserved pets. She plucked the letter from its beak, cracking the Hogwarts seal. That only meant it was from one of her professors.

Miss Morgan,

Miss Blake would like you to escort her to Hogsmeade this evening so that she can pick up materials necessary for her success here at Hogwarts for the year. Please meet her at the North Exit at 5:00 pm. Do not be late.

Deputy Headmistress

Matilda Weasley

I really hope you guys like this fanfic because GODDAMN I’m having so much fun with it. We love Alice in this household.

[harcourtholmesii]

Missing Pieces (Part II)

This is an IronQrow fanfiction, so if this is not a pair you care for, this may not be for you. I must request that you mind the tags and the warnings below, and if they are not for you, you may move on if this is not your thing.

This is a gift for @ironwoodprotectionsquad, and I’m so sorry I hadn’t gotten it out any sooner! I hope you enjoy, as does anyone else who chooses to read!

Pairings: James Ironwood x Qrow Branwen / Other? Words: 1719 Rating: M Warnings: - Mentions of Intrusive Thought - Mildly Referenced Death - Depression and Anxiety

~X~

‘It’s really nice here…’ That voice, so soft it was almost a whisper, was a relief to James after such a long period of silence.

 Since they had left the house that morning, Penny hadn’t said a word; simply taking in the suburban streets and the morning skies. Her quiet demeanor, though hardly new, was still something that worried James deeply. Without her words, he struggled to understand how she might be feeling, and whether she really was okay with this trip to the park.

 The morning had been chilly, but not uncomfortably so for two people who had previously resided within Mantle’s walls. On those occasions when the power went out and the heating system went down, even the Spring winds were known to quietly steal away the lives of people who thought they were safe in their home. The cold, as horrid and oppressive as it could be, halted machinery, froze the people to their core and made it next to impossible to repair fractures to Mantle’s walls.

 During the cold nights, the Grimm were closer than ever beyond the walls.

 In Vale though, the chill of Spring was little more than a slight sting when feet met cool tile, or that first shudder when one stepped outside. In Vale, the sun was a golden light and not seemingly so distant as it could be in Mantle. In Spring, flowers actually grew, and the fields, gardens and towering trees bloomed with a rich green sheen.

 After a good hour outside, having walked the perimeter of the park and then sat down on a nearby bench, Penny had finally broken her silence. Perhaps it had been the sight of children playing on the nearby playground or the sound of their laughter and their parents’ chatter, but something had finally soothed Penny.

 Having her relaxed was a relief to James; as he was utterly out of his depth with how ‘normal’ people or more emotional people, like Penny, handled their grief.

 ‘Enjoying it?’

 ‘It’s pretty.’ She hummed, plucking a feather off of the pavement by her feet. She swiped it under her chin and giggled lightly at the ticklish sensation. ‘I haven’t even heard birds before now. It’s nice.’ The peeping of some finches overhead just proved her point; James hadn’t even noticed that Mantle was missing many birdsongs until now.

 ‘Heads up!’ The call came slightly too late, as with a sudden ‘THWAK!’ Penny’s head snapped to one side with the sudden hit. A ball bounced off the side of her head, leaving half of her fiery, orange hair splayed out and frizzy from the contact. She blinked once, twice, and the slight shutters over her optics fluttering open and shut to adjust to the sudden touch.

 ‘Penny!’ James was in front of her at a moment’s notice, kneeling down in front of her and resting a hand gently against the attacked side of her head. ‘Honey, are you alright?’ He knew she couldn’t really feel pain, not in the same way as humans at least, but she seemed stunned. A slight system shock to the sudden contact of that offensive plaything.

 ‘I-… I’m fine…’

 ‘I’m so sorry!’ A young girl cried. From first appearance, she would seem about the same age as Penny appeared. She was dressed all in black save with some accents of ruby red, including one long, hooded cloak.

 Behind her another girl, a friend perhaps, was just catching up to the scene. Long, wild golden hair whipped about in the wind, and hand outstretched to rest on the first child’s shoulder.

 ‘I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it, I swear! It was an accident!’ An unstoppable tirade turned distressed word vomit was only halted by the second girl’s interjection.

 ‘Ruby!’ The first girl was silenced.

 James didn’t pay them much mind, worried about how Penny was responding. She seemed too stunned to speak, to even comprehend what had happened. James eyed the ball where it had stilled by the bench’s leg, affronted by the trouble it had caused. An intrusive thought did enter his head of returning the favour, but he shook it away and out of his head.

 Just an accident. It was a simple accident, and they did apologise.

 ‘Are you sure you’re alright?’

 Penny nodded her head, holding his hand where it rested against her cheek. She pulled it away and James knew he had overstayed his welcome when it came to contact, watching her smooth down her hair and blink. She was still adjusting.

 ‘I’m so sorry…’ The first girl, ‘Ruby’s’, words were but a whisper.

 ‘My sister didn’t mean it. We just kind of got into it and we couldn’t catch it before-’

 ‘It is fine.’ James sighed, running his fingers deep into the corners of his eyes. He breathed, standing and turning to look at the two girls properly. Something about him, his height perhaps, must have made them uncomfortable. Ruby had stepped back, and her sister had stepped in front of her slightly, arm out in front of her.

 James did have a face that constantly went to rest in a mildly pissed expression; it could be he was unintentionally shooting them his most furious glare and he didn’t even realise.

 He cleared his throat and adjusted his tie awkwardly, not really sure what he could say to ease their nerves. The younger of the two had stopped looking at him and had turned her gaze to Penny. He stepped in front of her, protective and admittedly frustrated. The first time since they had been to Vale and his goddaughter had been hurt, even if it was a mild ‘injury’.

 ‘What’s going on here?’ A new voice drew James’ blue eyes up to glare at the stranger. Just how many people were going to start inserting themselves into his and Penny’s space?

 The character in question was perhaps their father; it certainly seemed evident on Ruby’s part. He had carmine eyes, and dark, messy hair, slicked back with natural oil. His appearance, lazily put together, seemed relaxed despite the almost threatening tone to his voice. Something about him struck James as familiar, not that he could pinpoint exactly what that thing was.

 ‘Uncle Qrow…’ The younger of the two sniffled, her eyes tearing up at the edges. ‘I didn’t mean to…’

 ‘I just hit the ball to hard.’ The blonde pulled up her hand, revealing reddening knuckles from where she had apparently punched the offending toy. ‘Ruby didn’t catch it and it, well…’

 ‘So it hit you?’ He pointed at James with an amused smirk but a growl in his voice. Had it actually hit him, James wouldn’t have been so frustrated. But it hadn’t.

 ‘N-No…’ Penny’s soft voice flitted out from behind James, and she poked her head around to stare up at the stranger. ‘Qrow’ cocked a brow, looking between James and Penny for a few seconds before his mind seemed to catch up with what he saw. A moment of understanding passed over his face and he smiled at Penny.

 ‘I-It hit me…’

 ‘I can see that.’ He turned an apologetic glance up to James and then stepped forward, leaning down so he was about eye level with Penny. ‘My nieces didn’t mean it. They never would hurt someone as sweet as you.’ He teased, causing Penny’s face to brighten ever so slightly. Her cheeks had started turning a soft blue which had caused this man to furrow his brow in some confusion.

 ‘I’m sorry that your daughter got hurt.’

 ‘She’s not my-’ Penny had receded back against the bench, pulling in on herself at Qrow’s words. Qrow winced slightly, realizing his mistake and straightened himself out. Both girls cringed in sympathy for their uncle’s reasonable slip.

 ‘She’s my goddaughter. We’ll be fine.’ James turned back to Penny, offering his hand to her. Hesitantly, she took it and slipped off the bench. She stood beside him, shying away from the strangers and keeping herself out of sight. ‘Did you want to head home, Penny?’

 ‘Uh…’ Qrow had stepped forward, only stopping when James levelled him with a stern glare. He didn’t want her any more uncomfortable than what she probably was, and the attention might have been too much.

 ‘Let us make up for it, right girls?’ Both of them nodded their heads in turn. ‘Are you new here?’

 ‘Yes.’

 ‘W-Well…’ Qrow seemed unsure how to actually ‘make up’ for the accident and the following slip. He turned to his girls for some help, the blonde one speaking up at last.

 ‘You could come over for dinner! Our dad cooks an amazing roast and we rarely end up finishing it.’ She suggested. Her uncle seemed to relax slightly now that his niece had come up with a plan. ‘Plus, uh… Ruby! She has a large hoard of collectibles that she’s been dying to show off. Perhaps, if you would like to, Penny…? Y-You could come over?’

 James looked down at his goddaughter, and how her eyes flicked back and forth, unsure what to do. Finally, she looked up at him with wide eyes and nodded her head ever so slightly. James smiled, resting a hand against her orange hair and soothed it between his fingers.

 ‘Only if it is not any burden to you.’

 ‘We wouldn’t have offered if it was!’ Qrow had responded, relieved and delighted. Ruby had skipped her way over to Penny and stopped short of hugging her. Instead, she outstretched her hand awkwardly in an offer to shake it, laughing slightly at Penny’s rigid movements.

 ‘Can I have your number?’ James took out his scroll, turning it over to the girls’ uncle and allowing him to put in the number. Finally, he passed it back, smirking at him and giving him a wink that caused something warm to blossom in James’ chest. ‘We’ll text you the address. Come by at 7pm, and we’ll have everything ready, mister…?’

 There was an awkward silence between them both as James had realised he hadn’t given his name. He offered his non-cybernetic hand, which Qrow took easily. The touch, even through the gloves, caused his hand to start tremoring.

 ‘James. James Ironwood.’

 Something had fired off in Qrow’s head because his smirk twisted into a wry grin and there was an awkward chuckle.

 ‘No shit.’

[queencloudy-art]

Hello! I’m new to your page! If you’re still doing the stardew farmer ask game may I ask 1,2,3,7 and 25?

Omg yes I absolutely am!! Thank you so much for asking, and welcome to my teeny little art blog! 😊

1, 2, and 3: name, age, and gender/pronouns!

Featuring her spring clothes, Farmer Willa is a cis girlie, and she's 23! She's basically me except a little older and with a slightly different name hehe

7: best friend

Her best friend is Sebastian! They understand each other deeply on multiple levels, especially when it comes to mental illness and struggling to meet others' expectations of them. They're thick as thieves! (Emily is also one of her bestest friends but I didn't have time to throw her in lol)

25: backstory

Her backstory I'm still fleshing out, but basically she worked for Joja just like the story goes. She hated her job and was struggling a lot with money, living in a tiny apartment in a rough part of the city. Most of her co-workers (save for a couple she slept with) ignored her and or avoided her completely. Untrue rumors were spread around the office about her sleeping with management and that's the only reason she's around, as well as other derogatory comments were made about her. Her personality was much colder and meaner than it is in the present.

She was often given her colleagues' work because she "was the only person that could do it right," leading to many late nights of unpaid overtime on top of her regular work day. It wore her down, and she rarely saw her family. She really couldn't take care of herself either, and on weekends she would sometimes get high enough to be able to forget all the awful things anyone said to her the week before. All of this combined was what pushed her to move to grandpa's Wildflower Farm, where she made a wealth of friends and a better life for herself. 💖

Fun fact: Willa's nails are painted pastel purple, and she goes to great lengths to keep them nice and neat. 💜

[shelly-ya]

Miscommunication 2

This my friends is a mature zone from here on out. Nsfw. Mature 18+ only. Minors DNI

Previously you were arguing with killer on a frozen lake that was cracking below you both but you didn't realise until it was too late. You felt the rush of the cold freezing waters around you.

Sorry for not posting this earlier, there has been a lot of incidents and also one of my closest friends passed on, but without further adu the second and sex filled chapter of killer x reader in miscommunication 2.

some intense sex scenes, and well let's just read away...

You pulled yourself from the freezing waters with killer right behind you. Being from the North blue you knew basics on frozen lakes and Killer being the smart man he was knew to follow your every move to save yourselves from the freezing water before the broken ice froze over again. You both were taking sharp painful breaths trying to keep moving without freezing your arses off. Thankfully you found what appears to be an abandoned cabin not far from the lake.

"You think we can get a fire going with these old furniture?" You asked as you both looked for any remnants of fire wood to no avail.

" sure why not. " Killer replied beginning to smash the old chairs and table easily. "You know the drill babe strip out of those wet clothes. Don't want you getting sick." You felt the smirk behind his mask which automatically made your eyes roll.

"Yeah Yeah don't call me babe." Taking the opportunity to look around the dark room. It was a log cabin with only a few chairs and one table which was already broken up for fire wood. A fire place with the tools for the fireplace still there but rusted over. There was a small kitchen with only a few pots and pans. You walked through a doorway that had no door to what looked a bedroom. A spring box bed with only a mattress that was unmade. Unconsciously you started stripping looking through the one pine closet looking for anything thing that could provide warmth, finding some blankets still neatly folded and covered in dust. "Looks like whoever left here they left in a hurry. Please don't be a haunted cabin." You sighed grabbing the blankets and began shaking the dust off flapping them in the air. When you were fairly sure you got the majority of the dust off you wrapped yourself in one and grabbed the other one and your wet clothing and walked back to where the blonde was. The fire already roaring and he was begining to strip, back turned to you. Throwing the blanket it hit the back of his masked head.

" Hey why'd you do that for? " he asked pulling his mask off and then wrapping himself and hanging his clothes to dry over the fireplace. You followed suit and hung your clothes to dry not even glancing towards him. You then grumpily sat down as close as you could to the fireplace back still turned towards him. Clearly you were still angry, he didn't press you to talk right away. You felt when he sat behind you and then the weight of his back pressed towards yours. "Shouldn't we keep each other warm with our body heat?"

" we should but I rather be

petty" you responded

"being petty will make you freeze to death."

"who was that woman Killer?"

"Hmm? Oh that woman is a new member of our crew. Her name is Serafina and well my captain likes her like really likes her. she was just handing me my beer when you saw us in the bar. We're you by chance jealous?" You heard the slight amusement in his voice when he asked you that question.

"who would be jealous of you?" Huffing and blushing your response.

" I got to admit though I was pretty jealous of your whole crew. They get to openly hug you and show their love for you. I can't even get to do that since our crews are well enemies. "

"Wait you love me?" You perked up spinning around making the man fall backwards. His head landing on your lap, looking down you saw his blue eyes shining up at you in surprise. Taking in his features you noticed his light purple lipstick and a small scruff starting to grow from his chin.

"I - I wouldn't say love as yet. But since the deserted island incident I can't stop thinking about you and how we almost had sex." His hands covered his face in exasperation . "What I am saying is I like you and I want no I need you. I know this is not even how I act. I mean I am a mass murderer and I can't stop this stupid feeling." He said raising from your lap to face you directly . "Please be mine" desperation and need clouded his eyes. You leaned forward and touched your lips gently to his pulling back as quickly as possible. "I didn't quite get what you were trying to say mind saying it again and a bit longer" he smirked. Embarrassed you leaned forward again and kissed him again. This time the kiss lasted longer and gradually grew wilder and hotter. You both on your knees groaning and moaning into each other's mouths. Your right hand in his long hair and left on his bicep. His right hand on your neck and left on your hip trying to pull you so close to ensure no space was left between you both. His lips left yours and landed stright on your neck. He nuzzled and kissed and sucked with you desperately chanting his name over and over again. He discarded his blanket a while back and now discarded yours.

"i am so making you mine now. I don't care who comes around here looking for us." Lowering you down to your back he followed you down not looking anywhere else. "Let 's make each other warm shall we " his eyes shun with pure wanton lust as he dip his down for another kiss. More desperate and hotter than before. You felt yourself lowered to the cold floor and his warm hard body on top of yours.

he was nipping and sucking every inch of your body. His rough calloused hands fondled and pinched your chest/breast. His breath now on your thighs kissing and licking, moving his head closer to your heat. "Killer... Please..." You whined lacing your fingers threw his hair trying to push him down onto you.

"Please what babe? I can't do what you want without telling me what you want." He mocked breath tickling you sending waves of pleasure through you.

" I want you to suck me and lick me and then I want you to fuck me so hard I want to be screaming your name " You boldly said. He was clearly caught by surprise for a moment and then did what you wanted. He licked and sucked you almost till you came however he stopped. To your dismay you began lifting your waist up trying to get him continue only to feel a single digit in you. "If you say how wet I am just from your tongue I'm done..." You said desperate for him to fill you up.

" I still need to prep you babe. " he said pumping another digit inside you. Throwing your head back you felt him scissoring his fingers inside you.

"pleAse I want you inside me please"

"Shit" he cursed pulling his fingers out and licking them tasting your sweet scent. He lined himself up to you and started easing himself inside you.

''aaahhh" you raised your hip allowing him to fit himself to the hilt. Your legs opening wider than you expected. He set a slow pace at first, both your hips meeting in slow ecstasy. Grunts and groans were the sounds mingled with your slapping flesh and squelching fluids mixing together. Your legs wrapped around his waist. "don't hu ha ah stop. Keep... Aah ah ah ah going ha"

"Mmpf ha not ha planning ha ha to nngh. You're so tight." He lifted his torso from on you, unwrapping your legs from around him pulling both your feet over his shoulders. Moving inside you faster than before.

"nngh killer!!!! " You closed your eyes hand over your mouth. His right hand on your chest/breast gropping whatever he can. "Faster , harder, oh dear me faster!!" You both chased your high.

" I'm ha ha ha... Close...... " he said before you felt him thrusting into you with out care and just wanton lust.

"aaaaahhhhh" you yelled without the spare moment to tell him you were close to. You were in a high when you felt him pull out and a warm liquid dropped on your stomach. when you came down from your high you realized he came on your stomach instead of inside you. Not wiping off you looked at the man who apparently dropped to the side of you. "You know there is a bed in that room over there." You said pulling your blanket around you again.

"Then let's go babe. I could do with a few more rounds of hot sex again." killer said pulling you towards the room. Well let's just say the only sounds that could be heard was the creaking of the spring box bed and the hot sexy noises you both were making all night long.

BONUS

The next morning greeted you with exhaustion and pure bliss. You were still wrapped in killer's arms and you both smelled of sex.

"You know killer. Our captain's are gonna kill us" you said nonchalantly trace an imaginary image on his chest.

"Yep"

"But who cares right." Unconsciously you played with the scruff on his chin. " you know i really like this. I think you would look so hot in a goatie for sure" you said closing your eyes for a rest.

@angelsdevils