#I named the blog to post this fic and then it kinda got left on a shelf and I finally felt like I could dust it off and finish it

[doveabovetheworld]

“We’ve Got Time”

Ashton Irwin x F!Reader

Summary; After one of his concerts, Ashton had a lot more on his mind than just saying hi to you.

Warnings; pure filth, NSFW, pet names (baby, love, beautiful, etc.), name calling, exhibitionism, unprotected sex, praise, kinda rough sex, oral (f receiving), dom Ashton, sub reader, semi-public sex, 18+ Minors DNI, cursing, dirty talk

A/N; So... After months of not posting things on here, I decided I’d post the first filthy fic of this blog for Smutember. I suck at writing smut but I swear it’ll get better eventually. Just bare with me, please! Anyways, I have tons of stuff I’m working on so I’ll be doing what I can to post a lot more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You’re so beautiful…” He mumbled breathlessly into your ear quietly, but enough for you to hear him, as his hands wandered to your hips and pulled you in closer towards him.

The back dressing room wasn't the most ideal spot in the world for what was about to happen but god did Ashton look good after playing a show.

He came into the dressing room all sweaty and giddy as you were sitting on the couch, waiting for him to come in so you could praise him about how well he played but your plans were immediately interrupted when Ash came into the room.

Once he saw you, he gave the cutest smile and ran over to you, giving you the biggest bear hug ever. His curly, honey-blonde, almost brunette, hair was dripping with sweat as well as his whole body.

“Oh my god, Y/N, that was an amazing show!” He said in excitement as you wrapped your arms around him to return the hug.

“You guys did amazing, love!” You said with just the same amount of excitement in your voice, “Seriously, I loved it.”

Ashton gave a tiny laugh and. pulled away just the tiniest bit and smiled at you, saying, “Well I’m happy you enjoyed it as well… Hey, y’know, I may have an idea.”

“And what would that be?”

“Well… maybe we could have some post-show fun. Just the two of us.”

You blushed as you realized what he was hinting at. You and him always have had a very experimental mindset when it came to the sexual part of your guy’s relationship so doing something more intimate in semi-public areas wasn’t anything new to you.

“You don’t need to if you don’t want to, hun…” Ash said in a kind and soft tone. He was always so gentle…

“No, no… I’d like to. You know I’m up for just about anything… It’s just that I’m worried that someone will come in.”

“Baby, we’ve got time, trust me. If you don't want to, we don't have to. I can wait.”

You stood there in thought for a moment and then looked back at him.

“Fuck it…”

One thing led to another and now here you are. Making out in the back dressing room with Ashton right after one of his shows, in which ANYONE can walk in. It was scary but exciting at the same time. You didn’t know exactly how to feel.

You could feel his hands on your waist, pulling you down onto the couch with him. The way his lips on yours made you feel so ecstatic and when you sat on his lap, you could already feel yourself, and him, getting aroused.

His hands wandered from your hips to the bottom of your shirt, slightly tugging at it. He wanted to see you. All of you.

“Ash, are you sure?” You asked in a somewhat breathy voice.

He nodded and left small kisses on your neck, making you squirm a bit, before he spoke, “Yeah… Who cares? No one’s gonna walk in.”

You held onto him a bit tighter and ran your hands through his hair, letting him know it was okay. With one eager motion, he took your top off leaving you half naked on top of him.

The look on his face was enough to get you more of him. He looked like he was practically drooling as his eyes wandered all along your body. He’s seen this part of you so many times but every time he worships you as if he’s never going to see you again.

He left a trail of wet kisses down from your neck to your chest, taking in every moment of this he could.

It took your breath away. All of it did. The feeling of his kisses on your skin, the look in his eyes, his hands holding you on his waist, all of it. You couldn’t help but let out tiny, breathy moans as he kissed and worshiped your body.

“Baby, you’re gorgeous… You are,” He said in a low and rough voice, making chills go down your spine.

You looked at him with doe eyes and smiled. His little compliments always made you happy. They always made you feel good…

“Yeah, well it’s only for you.” You said in a quiet and sweet tone. You ran your hands through his hair and kissed him on his neck.

He let out a tiny whimper when your lips met the skin on his neck. You could feel his hard, and still clothed, dick against your soaked panties. You were both already so turned on… You knew he’d tease you for it.

“Already wet, huh?” He asked with a smirk, followed by a little laugh.

“Shut up… just fuck me or something already.” You replied as you grabbed at his shirt to take it off.

“Wait, love. You gotta be patient.”

“But-“

He cut you off with a demanding look in his eyes. You knew better than to go against his orders.

“I said, wait.”

Again, chills ran down your spine. You were getting impatient but went along with what he said, knowing he’d make you wait longer if you didn’t.

“Good. Get up and take off your clothes.” He ordered and right away you did as he said. You took the rest of your clothes off, leaving you fully exposed and vulnerable to him and anyone who would walk into the room.

Ashton had the biggest smile on his face. He stood up and took your hand in his, bringing you back down to the couch.

“Open your legs, darling… I’m gonna make you feel good for being a good girl, alright?” He said with such sweetness in his voice. His voice made your cheeks get bright pink as you nodded, letting him know you were okay and understood what he said.

He gave a cheeky smile and went to his knees right in front of you. His eyes had a gleam in them that showed pure lust and desire in them as he stared at you. He leaned in a bit closer and left small little kisses on your inner thighs. He was teasing you, again.

“A-Ash… c’mon is that necessary?” You asked in a slightly annoyed tone. You wanted him already but you knew it wouldn’t happen yet.

He looked up at you and pulled away slightly, “What’d I say, Y/N? I told you to be patient. You just have to wait.”

“Ash, I don’t wanna wait though… Please? I need you…”

If your begging didn't work, then nothing would. Good thing you knew exactly how to get what you want.

Ashton let out a string of tiny curses before leaning back in to leave kisses closer and closer to your clit. He gave into your pleas.

“A fucking-”

He gave you a tiny kiss.

“Brat, you-“

Another one.

“Shouldn’t even be-“

Another.

“Getting this.”

And with that his lips met your pussy and his hands held onto your thighs tightly, keeping your legs spread open for him. His tongue went through your folds and he let out moans, sending vibrations through your body.

You couldn’t form words as you moaned over and over again at the feeling of him eating you out. His nails dug into your thighs sending a shock of pain to you but you didn't mind. It felt good. You wrapped your hands in his hair, tightening your grip.

He moved his tongue out of you, leaving you to let out a whimper, and moved to your clit.

Waves of pleasure crashed over you as you tightened your grip on his hair even more and moaned. It was heaven, the way he made you feel. You adored the feeling of his mouth on your cunt making you squirm under his touch. You could feel yourself getting closer and closer to your orgasm, you were hot and shaking and you were in pure bliss. You were all his.

“A-Ash… ‘M gonna…” You could barely get the words out but he knew what you were trying to say.

“Go ahead. Go on and come for me…” He said against your clit before going back to the same motion of playing with it.

“T-Thank you… Thank you…” you whined out loudly before feeling that tight not in your lower stomach break. You felt yourself coming and you gasped out for air, holding onto Ashton’s hair tighter, making him let out tiny moans as he rode you threw your orgasm.

You let go of his hair and he moved back to look at you as you both tried to catch your breaths. His face was covered with your arousal. God, was it a beautiful sight to see.

He wiped away some of the wetness on his face and licked his lips.

“You need to be quieter or someone’s gonna come in.” He said in a quiet voice, starting to stand up.

You got bright pink again.

“I shouldn’t have let you come since you weren’t listening but I did ‘cus I love you,” he spoke again.

“Thank you. I love you… So much.” You responded, looking at him as if you were still on the couch. He stood right in front of you and started to get undressed as well.

“You’re so, so lucky I love you, sunshine.” He said as he leaned over and kissed you.

You could taste some of your arousal on his lips and tongue. He cupped your cheeks with his hands and pulled you closer to him. You both knew you wanted each other more, it was apparent in both of your guy’s actions.

He couldn’t wait any longer. He needed you.

“Lay down, darling.” He ordered, and again, without any hesitation, you did as he said.

He got on top of you and put your legs around his waist as he lined up the tip of his cock with your pussy and looked at you to see if you’d still be okay with it. You nodded and that’s when he went in.

The groan he let out was pornographic, beautiful even. His hazel, almost green, eyes looked at you with love. He stayed still for a few moments for you to get adjusted before he started to move. It was slow, at first, but then his movements got faster.

You and him both let out quiet moans as the feeling of him going in and out of you clouded your mind.

“F-Fuck… baby, you feel so good…” He mumbled to you.

All you could do was let high-pitched moans out as he started to go faster and deeper inside of you, making you go crazy. You couldn’t handle it.

He started to say something again, whispering small praises and moans into your ear.

“‘M close… a-again…” You muttered through moans, trying to stay a bit quieter.

“G-Go on, baby… me too…” he whispered through tiny moans. “‘M so close… Where’d you want it?”

“I-In.” You said almost immediately.

You needed him to fill you up. You needed him inside of you. He felt so, so good. It was like you two were made for each other, the way he filled you up so perfectly.

He nodded his head and after a few more deep, and now a but slower, thrusts, you both hit your orgasms. You both tensed up and you looked each other in the eyes with love. His lips were bright pink and he was moaning your name over and over. He felt so good and so did you. It was amazing.

You looked up at him and ran your hands up and down his back with a smile as you both finished off your orgasms.

“That was absolutely amazing.” You said with a huge smile, caressing his cheek with your thumb.

“Hell yeah, it was.” He responded with a small kiss and a cheeky smile.

[halfmoth-halfman]

we're starting to get into the spooky months now, so what better way to close out the summer vibes than with a fic rec list!!

unfortunately, the original of this post got messed up through my queue and it left me discouraged and not really with the energy to go all out like i usually do so i apologize if the reviews are a little lackluster this time around, but i did love and adore every single one of these fics 💜

if you wanna see more more of my fic recs and favs, i have em all on my recs blog, here!! please note the navi page is still under construction!!

and of course, if you have any fic recs of your own, feel free to send em my way here or on my sideblog - i love finding new fics and writers!! 💜

Javier Peña

birthday bash || a pile of cards - @mvtthewmurdvck

✧ what else can i say? cute. adorable. perfect. made me feel like it was my birthday, because this was fic was such a gift. i don't know how jo is able to write the cutest and most fun relationship dynamics, but it makes my heart soar every time.

late night texts || iv. before the gold and glimmer | bonus scene: phone sex | v. you make me feel wild | vi. the place where i want to be | bonus scene: wicked games you play | vii. oh the sweetest thing - @mvtthewmurdvck

✧ i will never not be in love with the way jo writes javi, and the absolute beauty of her writing. the way this relationship builds and feels so real with equals parts teasing and the shyness of the first time meeting someone you kinda sorta know always leaves me stunned.

John "Soap" MacTavish

run away to me || i. - @halcyone-of-the-sea

✧ i'm warning y'all now, hal has spoiled me this month and a lot of the fics on this list are gonna be hers. but to start we're talking about this fantastic fic. blacksmith!soap was not something i knew i needed and i am foaming at the mouth to see where this goes.

soap comforting reader - @nrdmssgs

✧ coming from someone who's had very similar anxieties around meeting a significant other's family, this hit very close to home and was so. damn. sweet. i love this so much and soap being an absolute sweetheart here was just icing on the cake.

John Price

glitter and gold || snippet - @writeforfandoms

✧ i could talk about this fic for hours. not only have i read it about a hundred times, but this fic helped inspire me to start drawing again. one of my top favorite comfort fics, everything about it is perfect. dragon!price being so in love with his wife, princess!reader finding joy and love and freedom with her new husband, the little appearances from the rest of the 141. it's all just perfect.

cardigan || part 1. it starts in a bar - @as-is-above-so-below

✧ price x teacher!reader was a lovely idea that i have been waiting for with baited breath and it did not disappoint. esp this part:

“Believe me. I get it. My career makes it difficult to find time for much of anything.”

“Yeah, well, I have sixteen kids.”

i love sassy teacher!reader.

songs that sound like sea-foam || (ii) | (iii) - @halcyone-of-the-sea

✧ this fic destroyed me. i had to call my mom and talk to her about it because i loved it so much. idk how to describe it, this filled me with a beautiful sense of longing and nostalgia of the classic fairytales my parents used to read me before bed

all, most, some, none - @halcyone-of-the-sea

✧ mmkay just one second while i-

lions and ibexes - @halcyone-of-the-sea

✧ i love husband!price, don't get me wrong, but i think farah was the real star of this fic. her characterization is wonderful, and the talk she and reader have is so sad (for lack of a better word) but also hopeful and real. i want to have a love the way hal writes it in her fics.

late night cookies - @halcyone-of-the-sea

✧ perfect dad!price fic right here. really hit me right in the unresolved daddy issues. good job.

where did you sleep last night - @captainfern

✧ i might just be a sucker for pet names like my love and darling, but this was so unbelievably sweet. reader missing price so much that they light one of his cigars just for the familiar smell of him?? i'm aldkasjl i love this so much.

glory to the reaper - @halcyone-of-the-sea

✧ the ability of hal to just present us with pure poetry like it's no big deal is just ugh chef's kiss. like all of this here:

How can life go on when such things are uttered to light? When they’re buried deep into your marrow like the dirt on top of a grave? 

How can the Reaper knock at your doorways when love exists in such quantity…in the fractures of his eyes? Only when his lips brush yours do you understand.

absolutely stunning.

ducky socks - @halcyone-of-the-sea

✧ dad!price strikes again by breaking my heart in the best possible way and gluing it back together with pure sweetness and a wholesome father-daughter relationship.

Keegan P. Russ

for the weak and weary - @halcyone-of-the-sea

✧ i am of a simple mind. i see hal has written a keegan fic, i drop everything and read the keegan fic, i sob uncontrollably and struggle to read through my tears, i scroll back up to the top and read again.

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick

some nights are like that - @deadbranch

✧ insert ohmygod they were roommates meme here. i love gaz, i love friends to lovers, i love roommates to lovers, i love everything about this fic. it's cute, it's sweet, it made me giggle. 10/10 will read again.

cult of vagabonds || chapter six: storm-flying petrels - @halcyone-of-the-sea

✧ i crave this series like something else let me tell you, and each chapter completely delivers. reader is somehow so frustrating and so relatable at the same time, no regard for her own life but also...same.

to be in love - @lethalchiralium

✧ am i biased because i requested this? yes. but also because this is cute and wholesome and perfect and the idea of gaz buying flowers for his crush makes me smile like an idiot and keri did a perfect job with this.

paper rings - @lethalchiralium

✧ this is me staring at keri after she's written one of the most perfect gaz prompts i've ever read and giving me the cutest, sweetest, most wholesome treat.

get behind me - @writeforfandoms

✧ i love fall fair stuff. corn mazes, haunted houses, bobbing for apples, all of it. and it's even better with the addition of gaz. soap being a little shit had me laughing, but gaz being such a sweetheart (and a little bit of a tease) just had my smiling and giggling to myself.

there’s no need to panic, i’m right here now, aren’t i? you’re safe - @writeforfandoms

✧ gaz is the best boi and even more so when jen writes him. i love the way she portrays him being so soft and comforting, but also not afraid to take care of problems for his significant other. and, as someone who's had loud neighbors, i wish i had gaz there to take care of them for me too 😭

Miguel O'Hara

glass houses - @lethal-chiralium

✧ actual picture of me pretending to be okay after reading this and having my heart shATTERED INTO A MILLION PIECES HOW DARE YOU KERI

welcome to new york || 3 | 4 - @writeforfandoms

✧ i consume these chapters as if they're a decadent slice of cake made just for me and they're so fucking delicious every time. i love lyla and jess in this fic (i love everyone in this fic tbh, but i gotta support the girlies) and this part right here:

(Note to self: bring a sweater.)

literally me. i love this so much and can't wait see where it goes.

hammock by the sea - @wyvernest

✧ the way this fic made me want to enjoy a sunny july afternoon on my honeymoon with miguel in a hammock soooo bad. idk if feel-good can be used to describe a fic, but that's how i feel about this one. it's a feel-good fic, makes me soft and happy and wistful.

spider-girl!reader|| you haven't kissed me all day | jealous miguel | saying i love you for the first time - @luveline

✧ luveline never misses with the miguel fics. every single one is A+ 10/10 chef's kiss. the domesticity while also keeping miguel his grumpy self is just lakdjaksl i'm so weak for luveline's fics and her portrayal of miguel.

Multi

dead disco || chapter 6 - @peachesofteal

✧ i really gotta read this series in small doses, because the way it makes my heart ache cannot be healthy. i just want everything to work out, for them to be happy but goddamn does peach want me to suffer (and i happily thank her for it)

how do they cuddle - @homicidal-slvt

✧ this has any and everyone in it, but more importantly it has my boys, gaz and roach and that's all that matters to me. gaz being the type to do a little kiss attack is so cute and something i can see him doing and roach tracing little shapes and letters i'm screaming. also graves being an absolute menace, you're so right for that.

Nikto

ravishing allure || prologue | cake for a dead man (i) -@halcyone-of-the-sea

✧ do i know who nikto is? not in the slightest. did that stop me from dropping everything to read this series? not in the slightest. will i ever be normal about one of hal's amazing fics? not in the slightest :)

Phillip Graves

close your eyes for me, love - @writeforfandoms

✧ protective graves just does something for me. like, of course, he's a little shit and all that, but, as we've seen in canon, that man is loyal to a fault so it makes sense that loyalty would extend to his significant other. and also the way jen writes him just makes me blush and giggle so that's a plus 🤭

Rodolfo Parra

pressing their foreheads together - @writeforfandoms

✧ i read Warnings: soft domestic fluff and kissing. and knew this fic was gonna be made for me. and i was right. this fic made me sigh longingly. i am so astronomically weak for the way jen writes this man and the way she writes soft domesticity.

Simon "Ghost" Riley

the safe house has seen better days - @ghostaholics

✧ how does it feel to have such a perfect understanding of a character and then create such a gorgeous fic on top of that??

Always staying awake, always assigning himself to the graveyard shift for watch while everyone else squeezes in a few hours of rest before the sun comes up.

i am in awe of ms. ghostaholics and her beautiful ability to turn characterization into pure poetry.

hired as a live-in house cleaner - @ceilidho

✧ i👏🏼love👏🏼this👏🏼fic👏🏼 this turned me into a big ol' soft pile of hearts and mush ugghh just the perfect amount of fluff. very cute but subtle too and y'know i think that fits ghost pretty well.

the team is invited to a wedding - @rileyslibrary

✧ one thing about me: i love a wedding. and this fic right here? absolutely delivered. it's got everything: ghost, gaz cameo, a wedding, macarons. not to mention the A+ banter between ghost and reader, i love them and this fic so much.

happiness || white carnations - @lethal-chiralium

✧ happiness hurts in a way that leaves me somehow longing for more and i can't describe it any other way. i think keri is determined to figure out how many different ways she can break my heart with angst and fluff and i couldn't be more thankful.

circles and squares - @mvtthewmurdvck

✧ i know i gushed about this fic already, but i'm gonna do it again. the best way to describe my feelings about this is that i would dedicate an entire section of my bookshelf just for jo's writing. the way she perfectly balances the differences between ghost and simon. the way he's stern and struggles, but doesn't lose his snark. the way he and reader support each other while still respecting each other and they're need for space. i'm so weak for this fic.

on the edge of the universe - @kil-g

✧ it's the world-building for me. it's the captivating atmosphere for me. there's just something so beautifully haunting here, and i am desperately clinging to every little piece of it. like i'm already feral for everything isa writes, and this is another excellent addition to the collection.

civ!reader kills someone out of self defense for the first time - @halcyone-of-the-sea

✧ had me hooked from the opening line and man was i on edge the rest of the time. i was panicking right there alongside reader, and the portrayal of her confusion and fear and anxiety was so well done. and ghost coming in to comfort her?? i was crying. so unbelievably good.

badly wrapped secrets - @mvtthewmurdvck

✧ i just-

"Thank you, for all of this.

He nods—short, and full of understanding, as well as signalling: you’re welcome."

i love them so much 😭

blood was its avatar - @halcyone-of-the-sea

✧ i was fighting for my life trying to read this without blushing like a sinner in church and ended up looking something like this-

and i damn near cackled like a witch at that ending LMAO

the roommate series || lover boy - @a-small-writer-in-a-big-world

✧ i knew nothing about this series going on and when i tell you i read through it with a swiftness. my skin is clear, my knees are weak, my livestock is fed. this fic (this whole series tbh) has reached in and wrapped around my heart in the best possible way.

illicit indulgences || the ghost of you - @floralpascal

✧ i am screaming. this is so...i don't know the right word. beautiful? stunning? gorgeous? all of the above? the captivating description of loneliness, the way ella manages to capture the stubbornness of ghost missing someone but refusing to admit to himself that he does. they're so perfect and in love and i'm just alskdaj

can you imagine someone threatening you - @mvtthewmurdvck

✧ you ever hear that phrase, so nice you reblog it twice? well i have, cause that's exactly what i did with this fic. it's the least i could do for the pure artistry of this fic. i love reader here, being so confident and capable and ghost being completely infatuated by her ability and so ready to kill anyone who disrespects her.

Valeria Garza

10 years too late on that, love - @writeforfandoms

✧ hello???? this was incredible???? i am??? slightly intimidated???? and in love??? with both valeria because she's mommy and with jen because she's such a wonderful writer and i am in awe of her talent.

[getonite]

hiiii! seen a couple of people do this, plus i realized i don't appreciate my mutuals as much as i should. and since the year is ending (literally today), i thought i'd appreciate y'all for a lil bit.

→ if the tagging irritated you, i apologize 🙏🏾. if i missed you, lmk, i was 100% half asleep while making this! (this is actually so embarrassing ngl. but i luv yall 🫶🏾)

(🎧 : avian) → @sensivs

starting off with my pookie with a beautiful (horny) brain. im dead fucking serious i have zero idea how we became mutuals (🧍🏾‍♂️). i just remembering talking to you one day, and the we were having full conversations in dms lmaoo. an emoji ring, helios, an unborn baby (??), and multiple fic ideas...now we're at the end of the year. i really appreciate you and all of your chaotic energy, it made me laugh! and all of your prompts are immaculate (🤌🏽). i await the days you post more fics or drabbles so i can support you the way you have me! :) luv u pooks, i def wanna ramble u more about hcs!

→ (i sound like im about to die omg)

(🎧 : snail/seraph) → @flimsyichigo

again, zero fucking idea when we became mutuals (i don't remember shit). we don't talk too often but i be seein you likeing my horrendously down bad and chaotic thoughts...i appreciate you bro (🙏🏾). i love your fluffy blue lock sruff, and your overall vibes are (yes, through the screen) amazing! thank you for dealing with my bullshit.

→ (as i type this, i realize just how many mutuals i have jeez, (half of which i barely talk to but still))

(🎧 : ame) → @pastelclovds

ameeeee, number 1 ive always loved your writing (iterally giggling and kicking my feet as i press the like button). your themes r so fucking gorgeous omg. we don't talk as often, but i love when we do interact. i hope we can more (im just easily embarrassed).

→ (i sound like a teenager leaving a love letter in a locker. omggggg)

(🎧 : ace ) → @acefantasyy

another person who puts up with my horrendously down bad bullshit takes. i applaude you for dealing with my ass lmaoo. but, on another note, i smile when i see you in my notes (no, i didn't originally mean that 2 b a joke). i really appreciate the reply you made when i went on a little break, thank you! i hope you continue to deal me, and i hope we interact more!

→ (i really gotta start talkin 2 yall more)

(🎧 : riri) → @pynkkgeto

we're friends irl. i don't have 2 say shit 4 u (luv uuu 🫶🏾)

(🎧 : rome) → @satocidal

yet another person who delt with my nonsense lol. you're quite busy, so you won't see this for a second. but thank you for being awesome and making me laugh with your naobito jokes. thank for the reply you left when i was the one going on break. hope all goes well for you!

(🎧 : idk ur name TvT) → @infrunamie

i feel so bad omg. but i wanted to appreciate your writing for a sec. whether its a drabble, headcanons, a fic, or just 100 words, your brain is miraculous when you write cuz it always leads to me wanted more. seriously, i love it. i was actually shocked you followed me, literally looked up to your writing ong (🙏🏾). i love it when you show up in my notes even if it's just a like. thank you for your reply when i went on break, trust, all of them got me through those shitty ass exams! ty!

→ (im sure this isn't what my therapist meant by being outgoing but im gunna do ts anyway)

(🎧 : spirit) → @spiritfrvr

literally the best vibes on earth i swear. your blog is like a fluffy hug omg. and (imo), you kinda bring that over to other blogs. i'd really like to talk to you more and ramble about random shit! :)

(🎧 : arlan) → @asuyaka

your drabbles r so cuuutee! i love them so much omg. especially the taking care of suguru one! i was surprised you liked my writing sm, and i love yours the same! i really appreciate the little reply under the break post and the christmas tree! seeing notifs of u makes me smile!

(🎧 : qi) → @yaekiss

i don't think we've been mutuals for too long, but omg we reeally should speak more!! i loved your message on the christmas tree! i love the vibe and look of your blog omg. i hope we can interact more!

(🎧 : juno) → @arlertdarling

hi junooo! ty for the message on my christmas tree, and i agree! we really should interact more! you seem like a realllly cool person, plus im on my fucking knees for your writing, dead serious. hope we can talk more, i hope you have a great 2024!

→ (srsly, y tf do i sound like im moving far away or smth TvT)

(🎧 : najma) → @honeybleed

ilysm ong. number one, we cousins (😔✊🏾; im joking pls help), number two, your theme was downright gorgeous (still is), number three, your writing it delicious. i haven't had too much time lately, buuut, i love how you post content that isn't completely smut (as a smut blog that fails at angst lol). its nice to get a break and see fluffy or angsty stuff in the tags instead of the same repeated material. you know you what you like and you stand firm in what you say (i need 2 b more like u fr), and your overall vibes are amazing! i love seeing your anime takes omg. i hope we can interact more in 2024!

→ (that kinda rhymed...and unrelated, but im listening to the mean girls soundtrack or 4 hours of sleep writing this)

(🎧 : yoru) → @dilfverz

number one, thank you for the messege on my christmas tree. number two, your so cool (😭). i love your themes and your writing, how you interact with ppl and anons is funny lol. literally look up to your writing ngl. i super appreciate your for explaining genshin impact to me, cuz im definitely not playing that damn game lol. your reblogs and likes in my notes make me wanna cry ngl. thank you for being so cool! (🙏🏾)

→ (am i over using emojis? i am so tired omg)

(🎧 : sy) → @wrizzesley

we just became mutuals like a week ago lmaoo. but i love your writing so much. and your themes?!?! (:O). i know damn well that shit is time consuming and exhausting, i applaud you, i could never lol. but anyway, i hope we can interact more in this new year. i think your really cool!

(🎧 : astro? idk im so sorry) → @astroknottt

i love your writing holy fuck. but other than that, i love it when you reblog my stuff! esp with those little comments, they've given me a bunch of motivation. and seeing you write such toe curling shit, that gives me motivation too! hope we can interact some more in the new year!

→ (pls ignore my silent pleas for help in these notes, but my vision is wonky. i promise im going to sleep in a second)

(🎧 : ) → @naee0

your probably locked out of tumblr again lol. but if you see this, thank you for your chaotic energy! and even if it was one sentence, what you sent on thr break post, i really appreciate it! even if you or me aren't on tumblr much, i hope we can interact a bit more! you're pretty cool! and i loved those drabbles. i hope your doing great!

PRODUCER MESSEGE: "i think that was all. again, if i missed you, please lmk. i might have been blind (my eyes prolly look like that squidward meme). but i appreciate all of you! thank you, and pls dont hate me 🙏🏾"

[kings-comic]

Hey! First actual post on this blog! ^^

I am not going to post the characters in the order from the line up simply cause I don't want to :,)

So, here comes Shade's information page!

Cape desing under the cut

Shade is the Link fron Ocarina of Time and Majora's Mask. After coming back to hyrule's forest, he got ambushed by Shadow. He did what he could to defend himself, but through the "fight" Link dislocated his left arm, lost the ocarina of time, his shield and lots of his other items.

Fortunately enough, Malon and Talon found him, passed out, before Shaow could take the rest. (equipement shown on the drawing)

Malon brought him the the ranch so he could rest from his injuries (they relocated the arm but it still hurts a lot). She gave him lon lon milk and faron's wind that fell onto the ground before.

Previously cursed by Shadow, Link wakes up in his counterpart's body (almost) , that means he can't go into sunlight anymore without getting sever burns. He also starts losing memories of his past adventures as part of the curse. BUT! He also gets the ability to merge with shadows!

And for Onny, aka Navi...

As you may know, at the end of oot, Navi leaves Link. In this fic, Shadow encountered Navi on his way to get Link. He hit her once being enough to knock her out and make her loose her memory.

She later finds Link again and they make friends again. Not remembering her old name, Link names her Onny and she seems to love it!

Age: 11 (18 with the time skip from oot)

***

Yes, (Shadow) is one of the main antagonists and yes, he uses Link's appearance to blend in -kinda- but mostly make the land lose hope into the hero. (He becomes an ally to Demise at some point)

I use Shadow, but his original name is Dark Link.

The cape desing;

It's a light beige with a Navi design at the front to hold it together and another one for the look.

[rin-bellatrix]

Oasis

"When everything's meant to be broken, I just want you to know who I am." - Goo Goo Dolls

August finds himself in the middle of the Pandoran desert, left to clean up his business' loose ends. Though, he's not as alone as he once thought, coming face to (pretty) face with the grifter who stole his heart. It seems that Sasha has some of her own loose ends to clean up as well.

I love Sasha and August ok

I'm firmly in the belief that August needs to reclaim his full redemption arc (he started towards the end of Tales and well, we just never got to see the end result 🤷🏽‍♀️)

So here's my first "saugust" piece! (Pls tell me if there's a better ship name for them out there 💀) I've written them as bg characters in my rhyiona fics, bc we love a big ol' happy family affair, but this is their first solo spotlight on my blog 😌💕

they need more recognition, they're kinda like Bonnie and Clyde, love my lil outlaw couple 💖 so stinkin' cute 🥰 (not to be confused with everyone's favorite villain couple, jackisha, who I've also written for 🤭)

Ahem, anyway~ this is part one, so this is unfinished. More to come from this particular story ✨️

Also. Am I posting this in the last hour of the month of August, instead of getting my shit together and posting it sooner...? Don't worry about it~ ☺️

Enjoy~ 🧡💜

It was always sunny on Pandora. Or at least, it seemed to be whenever August had to venture out of the dark shithole that was Hollow Point. The white sub-giant star that was Pandora's sun seemed to be on full blast today, the curve of the horizon a warbled, dancing edge in this heat. Sweat rolled down the side of his face and gathered at his jawline before spilling off in incessant drops. He shook his head to get the sweat out of his eyes before leaning into his truck bed and grabbing two fistfuls of rough canvas.

He tossed another burlap covered carcass onto the small pile of bodies, grunting with its weight. His Ma might be gone, but that just left the family business up to him. Which meant cleaning up the mess when a rival gang thought that they could prove themselves bigger and badder. Not a chance. But it was best to dump the bodies farther away from the entrance to Hollow Point to avoid scavengers somehow finding a way to spill into his town. That was the last thing he needed.

Dusting his hands off, he slammed the trunk door closed and ripped an old rag out of his back pocket. Mopping the perspiration from his neck and face (minding his piercings), he squinted up at the ball of fire in the sky and cursed its heat. What he wouldn't give for an ice cold drink right about now, he was fucking parched.

Stuffing the damp rag back into his pocket, he rounded his truck to head to the driver's side. His boots kicking up sand, his mind already focused on securing a cold shower as soon as he got back home. Gripping the handle, he pulled and yanked the door open, one foot on the step bar ready to hop in, before he looked up and froze.

"Thirsty?" Sasha chimed, sitting relaxed behind the wheel, dangling a cold bottle that was dripping with condensation.

The sight alone had him wondering if this was a mirage, if the heat had really gotten to him and made him hallucinate this as his own personal oasis. But then her scent of orange blossoms hit him, and he took a step back in shock. The sweet scent that sometimes haunted his dreams was a startling contrast to the freshly decomposing bodies that he just unloaded from the back of his truck.

How did she even get here without him knowing...?

She was as beautiful as ever, maybe even more so if that was possible. Her locks were pulled back in a sleek style, much like the last time he saw her during that whole vault debacle. Her outfit looked clean and classy, a stark contrast to his current state of sweaty and sandy. She wore reflective sunglasses that kept him from seeing her eyes, only his own warped image staring back at him.

When she arched a pretty brow, waiting for a response, August had to reel himself in. "What the fuck are you doin' in my truck?" No one could ever say that he didn't have a way with words.

"Is that the greeting I get? After I came all this way to bring you a nice refreshing drink, because I know you always leave to come here without one."

It shouldn't move him that she remembered his dump sight. It should mean nothing that she remembered he always forgot to pack a drink. It wasn't a big deal that she came to drop off a cold drink. She was a con artist, this is what she did. It's how she wormed her way into his heart the first time. He told himself this, and tried to ignore the way his heart beat a little faster at the implication that she still cared about him.

Did she ever really care about him...?

"What's it to you? If I forget to hydrate, how's it any of your business?" He glowered at her, old hurt resurfacing as if it were just yesterday.

She watched him from behind her sunglasses, quiet as she struggled to find a new lie to fixate on.

"Listen, I don't care, get the fuck out of my seat and go back to wherever you came from. You've got nothin' here, unless ya want me to put a bullet in your brain."

Sasha pursed her lips, her free hand settling firmly on the steering wheel. "I'm gonna drive you back." When he opened his mouth to argue, she continued. "I just want to talk." When he remained suspicious, she reached up to remove her sunglasses, meeting his eyes clearly. "Please?"

Her eyes were so clear, the light jade so beautiful with her complexion. His mind told him to watch his heart, not to fall for her tricks. But his heart told him to go along with what she wanted, simply because it was her who asked. August considered himself a strong man - an intelligent man - but in the face of the woman he loved, he crumbled far too easily.

He grunted as he slammed the door closed, rounding to the passenger side of his own damn truck. He hopped in, the cab rocking with his momentum, the door shutting behind him as he huffed.

Sasha held out the bottle again, and he watched as a drop of water raced down the side and gathered at the bottom before splattering across his leather seat. He looked up at her and met her eyes again, ignoring the excitement that wanted to bubble to the surface.

"Is it poisoned?"

The pretty grifter frowned, before twisting the cap off and taking a swig, once again holding it out to him. "That answer your question, smart ass?"

He hesitated before taking the bottle from her. Glancing down as she shifted the car into drive and pulled off, he noticed the faintest glossy shine of her lip gloss on the lip of the bottle. As the truck rumbled through the Pandoran desert, he recalled how slick her lips were when she would kiss him after applying it. They way she giggled when he pulled back and groused about the texture. How she would joke with him, arms looped around his neck, if she should withhold her kisses then. And he would snag her closer by her waist, pulling her into him and grumbling a complaint against her wet lips as he kissed her through her laughter.

He eyed the residue of it on his bottle now. Then, he lifted it to his lips and drank deeply, imagining that he could feel a phantom press of her lips against his own. It quenched him like nothing else.

☆

TBC

☆

☆ borderlands masterlist ⋆ main masterlist ☆

©rin-bellatrix 2024

[jut-and-dae-enthusiast]

The Only Exception // s.c.b

pairing: idol!changbin x fem!reader I genre: fluff, friends to lovers, some angst, one sided love, 18+ I warnings: some talk of self-image issues, relationship trauma, explicit sexual content, unprotected sex (wrap it up kiddos), breeding kink if you squint, oral sex (f receiving), use of pet-names (babe, baby,princess), mc is unexperienced but not a virgin, aftercare, i am a huge simp for seo changbin, mc is plus sized (bc there aren't enough chubby y/n's in the world and this is my fic)

word count: 10.3k words

a/n: This is my first time posting a fic on here and I have no idea how it's gonna go. If you guys enjoy this, I already have more than enough ideas for a second part/make this into a series.

feedback and re-blogging is deeply appreciated!

synopsis: she's given up on love and decided to focus on building her career. However, meeting a certain member of Stray Kids may change things.

 

Everywhere you went, whispers followed. 

Everywhere you went, whispers followed. 

“There's the spinster.” “Did you hear when she said she’ll never get married?” “I wonder how many cats she has at this point.”

In the beginning, it bothered you a lot. You would lash out, cry, yell. People thought you were crazy, labeling you a psycho on top of all the other things they said about you. But eventually they left you alone. 

Now, even when you hear these whispers, you ignore it. Do you find it annoying that people talk like this even though you’re only 25? Yes. But you figured it was probably magnified due to your outspoken hatred towards the idea of marriage. 

“A man will only slow me down.” You would mumble passively whenever your employee’s tried to ask you about this mindset. “Do you think I achieved this much by this age because I was flirting with boys and going on dates?” Whenever you spoke like this, the awkwardness rose in the air like a swift breeze. “But that’s just my preference. Do whatever you like.” You tried to lighten the room, but it hardly worked. 

The thing you despised the most were the men who attempted to “tame” you. They were normally men who would recognize you from work and try to approach you at the bar. 

“Maybe you just need to meet the right guy.” Was a common line. 

“Are you implying that you are this mystical right guy?” You would retort and watch the fire snuff from their eyes. Because they were losers to start with, they were never persistent. They preferred cute, easy women. Women who would giggle at their jokes and smile brightly at them. If you thought really hard, you could remember a time when you were exactly like that. 

Seven Years Ago

“Why don’t you put yourself out there? The love of your life won’t come onto your doorstep!” Your friend teased, pausing the romance movie you had put on the tv. 

“I don’t know, it’s kinda scary. I think I’m okay with waiting.” You assured them, resuming the movie and tuning them out. 

Eventually, you gave in to their nagging and decided to go on a blind date. When you got there, you smiled softly to yourself. While he wasn’t the most handsome man you had ever seen, he had potential. A different haircut, maybe some better clothes. Something in your stomach felt weird, but you pushed it to the side, calling it nerves. 

The date went well. He was nice and made you laugh. You could immediately tell that he liked you more than you liked him just by the way he looked at you. Also, the way he practically begged for your number at the end of the date. When you got home that night, they texted all night. Even though you weren't crazy about him, you liked the fact that he gave you attention and figured it wouldn’t hurt to just see how it goes. 

Fast forward two weeks and you could feel yourself liking him more and more. Even though you were scared of how quickly your feelings were developing, you were comforted by the fact that he still seemed to like you more. He was still actively pursuing you and messaging you all day. 

A month later, your relationship still wasn't official. However, you had completely fallen for him. In the ways you weren't attracted to him before, you suddenly found him cute. you found his style endearing, his haircut adorable. Even when he was forgetful or late, you were just smitten with him. They had gone on many more dates during that time. They went to the movies, cafe’s, walks in the park, just about anything a college aged couple could do. 

“Hey, I think we should stop here.” He suddenly said out of nowhere as they walked home together after seeing a movie. 

“What?” you asked, confused at the sudden confession. 

“I just think that we shouldn’t see each other anymore.” It was quiet for a moment between the two of them, tears already spilling down your cheeks. “You’re such a sweet girl. You deserve someone better than me. I know you’ll find a guy who really cherishes you one day.” And then he left you crying in the middle of the sidewalk. you were hurt and confused. you didn’t want someone else, you wanted him. How could he walk away from you so easily when not even a week ago, he gushed about how perfect you were and how lucky he was to have you? Said he liked you so much over and over on the phone because he was so enamored with you. 

A week later, you saw him walking in the store. His hand was holding tightly to a girl who was small and cute and pretty. You ducked into an aisle to avoid making eye contact with him, frantically wiping the tears from your eyes. You remembered how he so adamantly told you he “preferred bigger girls” and didn’t even care about your size. You weren't massive by any means, but you looked big compared to that girl. You could probably fit four of that girl into the hoodie you were wearing right now. 

After a long while of convincing, you allowed your friends to set you up on yet another blind date. You decided to go into this one positively. Maybe last time was an isolated incident. Not every guy could be like that, right?

This time, you found yourself in a difficult situation. You had liked him from the very beginning. He was handsome and charming and said all of the right things. But he clearly only wanted one thing from you. He was respectful and gentlemanly for the first month, sweeping your right off of your feet. However, after they had their first kiss, you saw a different side of him. Begging for explicit photos, sending unsolicited photos of his own, and becoming sex crazed in general. Suddenly, they couldn’t even meet up without doing something. Whether it was intense makeout sessions or touching, he was always coming onto you. You felt conflicted because you did in fact like him and was okay with it most of the time. However, he only spoke affectionately to you when they were in the act of doing things like that. He only said he loved you when he was inside of you, which you realized when you would try to say it during the day and be hit with “oh yeah, me too.” He only called you pretty when you were naked, only wanted you if you were pleasing him. After six months of this, there came a time when you said no. They were sitting on his couch and his hands began to wander, as they always did, when you stopped him. 

“Babe, I’m not really feeling it tonight. Can we just cuddle?” You pleaded with him, your voice soft but your hands firmly moving him away. 

“Yeah, sure.” He pretended to be okay with it, pulling you in and kissing the top of your head. A few minutes passed and he huffed, clearly upset. Less than ten minutes after that, his hands started wandering again. 

“Babe, please. I asked for just one night.” You pleaded again, scooting away from him. He groaned and rolled his eyes. 

“You’ve been totally leading me on all night though.” He whined, jutting his lip out. 

“No I haven’t.” you were confused, knitting your brows together as you looked at him. 

“Yeah you have. You wore that outfit you know I like and you keep kissing me.” 

“I didn’t wear this outfit with the intention of doing anything to you. I just think it's comfortable. And we can’t kiss without going any further?” You could see him getting frustrated with you, his attention everywhere but on you as you spoke. 

“I just think you’re so sexy, babe. Look, I already want you so bad.”  He points to the bulge growing in his pants at literally you just sitting there. “It hurts so bad, baby. Please.” He moved towards you again, slowly. When you tried to push him back again, he groaned and rolled his eyes. “I guess we can just break up then, huh? You clearly don’t like me anymore.” He pouted, standing up from the couch. Your heart dropped, fear making your muscles clench. 

“I-I never said I didn’t like you, I just…” You sighed. “I feel like this is all you want from me. Can you promise that you like me for more than just sex?” He nodded eagerly, quickly climbing on top of you. The second you touched him, he moaned “Ah, I love you so much.”

The next day, he broke up with you. He said he needed to focus on himself for a while, telling you that you would eventually find someone who loved you more than he could. Just like the last one, he ended up with a new girl shortly after. 

This time, you not only felt heartbroken but also used. You felt like you got nothing from that relationship other than a different way to view yourself. Is that all guys would want from you? 

Every single relationship you had in the next two years ended on the same note. Eventually, you realized that men only liked you while you were convenient. While you either gave them what they wanted or until someone they wanted more came along. You were never the first choice, never the only option. Because of this, anger grew in your heart. You had shed tears for men who didn’t even remember you or want you. You were determining your value based on if these terrible men wanted you. 

“No, never again.” you muttered to yourself as you drug yourself out of your bed. You wiped the remaining tears from your eyes and decided that from that moment forward, you would no longer subject yourself to this. You would show each and every one of those jerks that you were a force to be reckoned with. That you didn’t need them exactly the same way they didn’t need you. 

Present Day

“Mom, we’ve been over this. No blind dates, no setting me up, no giving out my number. You know how I feel about all of that stuff.” you were exasperated, the phone call with your mother going the direction it always did. 

“You’re already 25 and aren’t married. I’m worried about you.” your mother was kind and soft, just like you used to be. However, your mother didn’t have to worry about the troubles herr daughter went through in regards to dating. Your mother was skinny and beautiful and could have any man she had wanted. She chose her husband in middle school and they’ve been together ever since. 

“Nothing to worry about here. I’m successful, rich, and happy. What more could I need?” You took a sip of your wine, looking out the window of your apartment. 

“Love.” your mother whispered softly. 

“I have that already! I love you and dad, my dog, my friends!” 

“Yes, but you know a love between a man and woman is different than all of those. It’s beautiful and wonderful all at the same time.” 

“Mom, I think you’ve seen too many romance movies. Love like that doesn’t exist for girls like me. I already tried that in college. My priorities are elsewhere now.” You knew your mom came from a good place, but you were tired of explaining yourself. You were tired of feeling like you were weird for feeling this way. If only people knew what had made you this way. If only they felt the fear in your chest when you imagined trying to date again. You would rather be alone for the rest of your life than have to feel that way ever again. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It wasn’t new for you to meet celebrities in your line of work. Your company was a management company, primarily helping overseas artists who are touring in North America. They gave them additional support, set them up with translators, set up their catering, everything they would need to have a successful tour. And with the rise in K-Pop, you were meeting more and more Korean artists. BTS was among your favorites that you had met so far, their world wide fame clear simply from their charisma. 

You wouldn’t consider yourself a full blown kpop stan, but you enjoyed listening to their music. It was also a good outlet for you because they had to say that they loved and cherished you. That they wanted no one else but you. You didn’t need the attention of attainable men who were subpar when these gorgeous boys made you feel like you were everything. It was a perfect balance because they were just far enough out of reach that you would never get your hopes up. 

“Ma’m, our next music artist is here to meet with you.” Your assistant announced from the door. In confusion, you looked down at your schedule. Maybe you had forgotten. 

“Alright, let them in.” You remained composed and professional, even though you had swore you had no more meetings today. You sat up straight and pushed forward a smile, greeting the group as they walked in. Now, this was an adorable group of boys. You bet they were all extremely young. 

They all awkwardly took a seat, shuffling nervously around each other. 

“Let us introduce ourselves. 1,2, Step out! Hello, we are Stray Kids.” The leader spoke up. His dimples were cute. Even their intro was cute. you nodded, smiling. 

“It’s nice to meet you all. My name is y/f/n y/l/n. Can we go down the line and hear each of your names?” You always did this so that no one felt too uncomfortable or left out. So, they each introduced themselves. Bangchan, Felix, Han, LeeKnow, Seungmin, Changbin, Hyunjin, and I.N. Without much thought, you dove into the meeting. They discussed what the boys would like, need, and everything that would help them have a comfortable tour. The boys were polite, almost hesitant to ask for anything. You reminded them multiple times that their company was paying for our service, so they should make the best use of it. 

The meeting ended and you immediately got to work sending out emails for each of their requests to their respective departments. As you were typing away, you heard a few gentle taps on your door. “Yes, come in.” you called out, your eyes never leaving the computer. 

“Miss y/l/nt, one of the Stray Kids members wanted to mention something to you.” 

“Alright, let him in.” You figured it was the leader, Bangchan. He seemed very responsible and clearly cared very deeply about his group members. However, much to your surprise, it was not him. you glanced down at your notes, trying to remember where he had been sitting so you could recall his name. He cleared his throat as he took a seat in front of your desk. “You are… Seungmin?” you asked and your heart dropped when he laughed. 

“No, I’m Changbin. Sorry for bothering you, I just remembered something that I needed to bring up.” 

“I’m so sorry. Please go ahead. Whatever you need.” you were embarrassed now, your cheeks flaming red. 

“So, while we’re on tour, I’m going to need to be on a restricted meal plan.” your brows furrowed in confusion. He continued, “I need to lose some weight, so I have to go on a pretty strict diet.” 

“Why do you need to lose weight?” you looked at his figure, buff and healthy, and found yourself confused but also frustrated for some reason. 

“Oh, uh, I’m just kinda the biggest member in the group. And I don’t want our fans to be disappointed in how I look.” Without realizing, you stood up quickly. 

“Excuse me if I’m being too forward, but that’s ridiculous. You look strong and healthy, which I’m sure your fans would be extremely happy about.” you realized your emotions and slowly sat back down. “While I know that you are in control of what you do and how you live, I just think that you shouldn’t restrict yourself. You already know how stressful touring is on your body.” His eyes were wide with your sudden outburst. 

“You… You really think so?” He muttered, still shocked. 

“But uh that’s just my professional opinion. I would hate for you to pass out or fall ill because of something that could have been avoided.” you cleared your throat and shuffled through some papers. For the first time in four years, your heart was fluttering. Like it had back then. No, this was inappropriate right off the top. Not to mention not what you wanted. “I can, um, make sure that there are healthier options that will keep you on track without restricting yourself.” you began typing an email, desperately avoiding eye contact with him. You knew if you saw the way he looked at you, you would immediately blush. 

“I would really appreciate that. Thanks for being so helpful.” you glanced at him and the way he smiled made you want to melt into the floor. He quickly stood up and bowed. “I look forward to working with you.” And then left the room. You turned your back to the door and covered your now fully flushed face. What in the hell was that? Maybe because you haven't felt like this in four years, you felt it all at once. Yeah, it’s probably just because of that. 

“Thomas, are you messing with me right now?” your tone was stern, your brows furrowed as your grip tightened on the phone in your hand. 

“Unfortunately, no Ms. y/l/n. We’ve tried to find replacements, but are unable to hire anyone.” 

“Okay, what about interns? Anyone?”

“This isn’t the kind of thing we can trust an intern with. This is essentially the most important role, ma’m. And the tour officially starts tomorrow, so I’m worried things may start on the wrong foot if this position isn’t filled.” 

“Don’t they have management on their end?” 

“Yes, but they hired us so that those employees could stay in Seoul.” You thought for a moment, annoyed. They needed an artist manager, someone who would work personally with the boys to get them where they needed to go as well as ensure their safety. It’s what you had started out doing before starting this company yourself, seeing the need was great. “I apologize if this is speaking out of turn, ma’m, but I think you would be a great fit for this. The main issue is that we need someone fluent in Korean and you can fulfill that requirement.” you rolled your eyes. 

“I suppose you have a point there. Let me talk with the advisory board about it and see if the v.p would be willing to fill in while I’m gone. I’ll update you.” 

Everything went swimmingly, if you can imagine that. Everyone was more than okay with you stepping out for a few months, meaning things wouldn’t need to be as uptight (but they never told you that). That morning you met the boys at their hotel, explaining that you would be in charge of caring for them the entire U.S leg of the tour, stressing that they shouldn’t hesitate to ask for anything. Their comfort and happiness was the top priority. 

“I thought you were the company CEO, why are you doing a job like this?” The leader, Bangchan, asked as they were riding in the van to the venue. 

“I am the CEO. However, I’m also the only person who could fill this position on such short notice.” you answered politely, giving him a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry, I’m more than qualified. I did this for a while before starting the company.” He nodded, flashing you a smile before one of the boys called for his attention in the seat behind him. 

After arriving at the venue, you jumped into action. Directing the boys towards their green room, sending the crew where they needed to go, and checking in with venue staff to ensure that everything was going according to the email that had been sent to them. Once things were handled outside, you poked your head in to check on the guys. 

“Is everything okay for you guys? Do I need to run for anything?” 

“Oh, no, everything’s perfect. Thank you miss…?” Bangchan was obviously unsure of how to address you. 

“Just call me y/n! We’re going to be spending quite a bit of time together, so no need to be formal!” you bowed and left, going to double check that things were in place for the boys, like water bottles, towels, other things. You felt the thrill of frantically running around that you had missed. Spending years in the office had made you forget how exciting it was to be on the scene. Maybe you would do this more often. 

You walked back into the green room to check on things, as you were working down your list, when you had clearly walked in on a conversation. When they noticed you, they switched from English to Korean. And you could tell he was talking about you. It was Han? The one with the puffy cheeks. You were still learning their names. 

“I wonder if she even knows what she’s doing. Like, how can a CEO know anything about what it’s like to actually be there? I bet she’s super overwhelmed.” 

“Ah, you weren’t in my van earlier when I explained it to Bangchan. I’m more than qualified, as I did this for a few years when I was in college. But I appreciate you worrying, it makes me feel very cared for. I hope you’ll continue to care for me moving forward.” You responded back in perfect Korean, which resulted in both of them looking at you with wide terrified eyes. 

“I-I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to insult you! I shouldn’t have been talking like that about you.” Han ended his sentence with a 90 degree bow and the other member (I.N?) also bowed. 

“Oh, don’t worry too much about it! I’m not offended at all!” You flashed them a smile and continued doing your work, successfully instilling the fear in them that would make them behave for you on this tour. 

As you continued about my work, fluttering from here to there, you accidentally walked into where apparently the weights were. Bangchan and Changbin were doing some pump up reps to make sure their muscles looked good. Your eyes instantly went to the shoulder muscles that were showing through Changbin’s shirt and you had to force yourself to turn away and look anywhere else. 

“Uh, just checking in boys. You’ve got about 20 minutes until the VIP soundcheck begins, do you need anything from me before then?” 

“Oh, actually, it would be amazing if you could bring us a few bottles of water? We forgot before we started.” Bangchan asked politely. You quickly reached into your backpack and pulled out two bottles. You turned around to set them on a bench and had to avert your eyes. 

“Let me know if you need anything else. I’ll be around.” You bowed and then quickly left the room. Good lord, that's dangerous. 

The show went amazingly, of course. As you watched from behind the stage, a bundle of towels in your arms, you found yourself enamored by their energy. You usually never cared much to pay attention during shows back when you were younger. But back then, you would usually find a cute roadie and flirt with him the entire time. A waste of time by your current standards. Also, why would you want to miss out on this? When they came back for their first outfit change, they were sweating so badly that they seemed so grateful for something as simple as a towel. After a quick change, a few makeup and hair touch ups, they were back out there for more. When the end of the show came, you found yourself getting emotional for some reason. It was almost like you could feel the sadness of their fans (which you learned are called Stay) at them leaving. Like this night they had been waiting so long for was now over and they weren’t sure when they would see them again. The boys, however, were exhausted. You could tell they gave absolutely everything they had for this show. There's no way they would be like that for every single show, right? 

Around five shows in, you found yourself feeling more and more comfortable with the boys. And clearly they started to feel comfortable around you as well, the younger ones affectionately referring to you as “Noona”. At the beginning, they were nervous to ask for anything. Now, you couldn’t get away from them. 

“Noona! Can you take us to a convenience store? I want some snacks.” 

“Noona, will we have time to sightsee?” 

“Noonaaaa, we’re in Seattle, we need to get Starbucks.” 

And you honestly didn’t mind it. They were adorable and it was your job to get them whatever they wanted. You found yourself getting closer to Felix and Hyunjin, two people you didn’t expect to get close to in the beginning. Felix obviously warmed up to you pretty quick, as he was just so talkative and sweet from the start. You found yourself talking with Hyunjin about things like fashion and art when the two of them were together. 

There was only one problem- you sensed that someone was growing a crush on you. That someone, of course, was Changbin. And you already were against dating/marriage, but you also knew engaging romantically with a client was extremely inappropriate. And it took everything in you to shove these feelings deep down. Of course, he was cute. And kind. And a great person to talk with. And good lord he was hot. He also had this habit of subtly complimenting you that drove you absolutely crazy. “Noona, your hair looks nice today.” “It’s sweet how attentive you are to us.” “Noona, that eyeshadow suits you really well.” 

They were coming up on the end of the tour when you found yourself alone on the roof with Changbin, stargazing in silence. Silence wasn’t uncomfortable with him. 

“We probably won’t see you after next week, huh?” He suddenly asked out of nowhere. 

“Uh, yeah, it’s not likely. Unless we can't find someone when you guys come again.” You felt nervous as the air shifted between the two of you. He obviously had something he wanted to say and you had a feeling it was something you didn’t want to hear.

“Can I confess something to you?” 

“You probably shouldn’t.” You were trying your best to remain logical and level headed as you always had been. 

“You don’t want me to?” 

“It’s not that, but I don’t want you to get in trouble.” 

“I won’t get in trouble.” 

“Alright, fine. What would you like to confess?” You asked and your heart was pounding. You didn’t want to have to turn him down. To reject his confession of love. But you couldn’t let yourself fall into this trap again. While he seemed sweet now, there was lots of time for him to become like the others. Maybe he only feels this way because you're conveniently in front of him. 

“I… uh, I think I have feelings for you. I don’t even know why I’m confessing this to you, but I can’t go on pretending that I feel differently.” He looked at you expectantly. You took a deep breath, and looked out at the skyline. 

“Changbin, I uh, I’m sorry but, um, I don’t really want to date or get married or anything like that.” Your hands were trembling. You were scared of how he would react, if he would hate you now. You actually cared how he felt. 

“Can I ask why you feel that way?” He asked softly, looking over at you. Tears pricked at your eyes. No one has ever asked why. No one cared enough to wonder. 

“Um, I just have a bad past with dating. I’ve never been anyone’s first option. I had my heart broken alot and this is a way to protect myself. If I close the door completely, no one can come in and hurt me.” It was silent again, the only noise coming from the traffic on the street far below. 

“So… I just have to prove that you’re my first choice and that I want you for you?” A tear slipped down your cheek. How did he guess that second part? 

“I mean, you can try. I’ll allow that. But, it’s going to be a lot of work. I’m kinda messed up.” You admitted, swiping the tears away from your face. He nodded slowly from where he was. At this point, the men from the past would have scooted over and put their arm around you. Changbin stayed where he was and watched you carefully. 

“I think you’re worth it. And I haven’t even known you that long. I can’t imagine how much more I’ll think that the more I know you… But let's start as friends first, yeah? I won’t push you into anything.” Your head was spinning. How was a man this considerate? He had to be faking. There's no way this could be real. 

“Sure, let's do the friend thing first.” 

So, the two of you exchanged numbers. Once the tour ended, he kept texting you. You kept waiting for the day he would come on to you. Waiting for an unsolicited dick pic. Waiting for the “i can’t wait any longer”. But it never came. Changbin seemed more than content simply being friends. Every time you found yourself beginning to let your walls down a bit, the men of the past would flash into your mind. They said all the right things, made all the right choices. You were still hesitant about Changbin. Did he have some sort of ulterior motive? 

“Aren’t you sick of this?” You asked him one day on the phone. 

“Sick of what?” He responded, sounding confused. 

“Sick of me making you stay my friend. You probably already have feelings for someone else by now.” 

“No I don't.” He retorted quickly. “And I enjoy being your friend. If that’s what I have to do to be by your side, then that’s fine. I’ll be your friend forever if I have to.” You felt your eyes water.

“Why do you always say stuff like that? Are you trying to bring my guard down?” 

“I’m not trying to do anything, Noona. I only wish you could trust me.”

“I do trust you. I just don’t want you to expect anything from me romantically.” 

“You know that I don’t. I told you I’m more than happy being your friend.”

Months went on and you kept getting to know each other. You were waiting for the other shoe to drop at any moment for the first little while. However, you slowly realized how pure his intentions were. He never once crossed the line, never even tiptoed near it. He truly genuinely cared for you. And while he never crossed the line, he made it clear that he only had eyes for you. He said so many times that he was more than okay with playing the long game. Slowly trying to win your heart. If he didn’t get to love you, he wouldn’t get to love anyone else. 

One night, you were extra tipsy from a few too many glasses of wine and decided to give him a call. 

“Hey, Seo Changbin! How dare you make me like you! You came into my office that first day so handsome and kind and whatever. You wrapped me around your finger from the very beginning and that was so fucking rude of you.” You slurred over the phone. He quietly listened, chuckling to himself here and there. 

“Noona, did you have too much to drink?” 

“Maybe, but whatever! It’s none of your business!”

“Okay, then for your sake, I’m gonna pretend I didn’t hear any of that and hang up okay? Make sure to drink some water please.” He was firm but reassuring. God he was so hot. 

“Changbin, do you still like me?” you asked quietly after a moment. 

“Yes, very much.” He replied almost instantly. 

“But I’ve made you wait so long…” It had been a year at this point since his confession. 

“It hasn’t been too bad, don’t worry.” He assured you and you could practically hear his smile. “I’ve gotta get back to work, but I’ll check in on you later okay?” His voice had dropped a little bit and you felt your heart thump even harder. 

“Um yeah, sure.” You couldn’t even think about what he said, the way he said it had the biggest effect on your drunk brain. When he hung up, you almost immediately fell asleep.

Changbin had become one of your closest friends at this point. You confided in him, laughed with him. But you wouldn’t let yourself feel anything romantic for him. You couldn’t. Even though they had known each other for two years at this point, you were scared he would suddenly change. 

The boys had come to LA for KCon (you only knew because you played a large role in the planning of the event) and asked to meet up with you for dinner. You obviously agreed, as you cherished them deeply. They had rented out a space for them to go out to and were already there when you arrived. They greeted you happily, running over to hug you. You smiled, happy to see them again and complimenting them on their most recent work. You took the open seat at the table, between Seungmin and Felix but was also across from Changbin. 

You ordered some pasta, not caring what they thought. Back when you were younger, you would have opted for a salad or something healthy looking so as to not look like someone who wasn’t minding your figure. However, now, you gave no fucks. You weren't trying to impress any of them in that way and you were hungry so you were going to eat. 

“You seem like you’ve been pretty busy since we last saw you.” Chan comments as we wait for the food. 

“Yeah, we’re doing a lot for KCon on top of other small artists doing tours. Thankfully I don’t have to do all the work.” You joked, chuckling. “But yeah, I’ve kept pretty busy. Not too busy to keep up with you guys, though. Just when I think you guys have reached your peak, you somehow go even higher. I’m very impressed and proud.” 

“Ah, Noona! You’re making me blush!” Felix shouted out from across the table, covering his cheeks. The food came to the table not long after that, so the conversation jumped around. you ended up sitting back and listening as they talked, enjoying your meal and the company. However, as you glanced in front of you, Changbin was observing you with a small smile on his face. 

“You ok?” He mouthed to you, his gaze soft and kind. You nodded and smiled. He winked and nodded before looking away. You could feel your cheeks begin to flush. But then your chest started to tighten. At the end of the night, they went to go their separate ways, a slightly tipsy Felix clinging onto you and whining about how he missed you already. 

“Aw, our little Felix is such a cute drunk.” you cooed at him, smiling sweetly. His smile widened even further as he nuzzled into you and hummed. You walked him to their car, where he slowly let go of you, pretending to cry as he climbed into the vehicle. “I’ll text you, Lixie.” You promised from outside, which made him smile again. Changbin hung back, clearly waiting for his turn to have your full attention. 

“Can you make some time for me tonight?” you asked him, wandering over towards him. He smiled and nodded, waving to the guys as they left. 

When you both got to your place, you knew it was time. You couldn’t deny the way you felt for him and he had waited so patiently until now. They were sitting on the couch and talking when you turned towards him and took a deep breath. 

“Changbin, I have something to say.” You announced, unable to look at him. 

“Oh, uh okay. Go for it.” He shifted nervously, eyes watching you intently. 

“Firstly, I just wanted to thank you for being so amazing to me this past almost two years. I really appreciate having you by my side as a friend.” You looked up at him to gauge how he was reacting. He was watching you, his brows knit together in concentration. You decided to continue.”I think… It’s time that I acknowledged my real feelings…” You paused for a second and took a deep breath. “I like you. So much. Like, everything you do drives me crazy and I want you so badly that I can’t even be afraid anymore.” Once you finished talking, the air was quiet between the two of you. You looked at him after a minute, afraid of what his reaction would be. Relief flooded over you when you saw his head turned to the side, a wide smile on his face and flushed cheeks. 

“Uh, is that how you really feel? You’re not just saying that for me?” You could tell he was trying to keep his composure, now wanting to spook you with his excitement.

“Yes, it’s how I feel.” You muttered, your fingers still trembling. 

“It makes me so happy to hear that. Like, I could die right now after hearing you say that. That was the cutest confession I’ve ever seen in my life.” He started gushing, unable to hold back. He quickly caught himself and cleared his throat. “Um, but I’ll do whatever you want. Like, if you wanna stay friends, that would be fine. If you want to date, I’m also very okay with that.” You laughed, feeling so safe in his vulnerability. 

“I want to try dating you, Changbin. I haven’t dated in a long time, but I want to give it my best shot.” He turned his back from you and squealed. Actually squealed. Like, kicked his feet and giggled. 

“Can I hold your hand?” He asked once he turned back around. You could tell that even though he was excited, he was conscious of your history with guys and wanted to be respectful. Without realizing it, you closed the space between them and kissed him gently, your hand softly on the back of his neck in an effort to pull him closer. When you pulled away, his eyes were wide. 

“Does that answer your question?” You teased, smirking. He immediately pulled you onto his lap and looked up at you lovingly. 

“Tell me when you’re uncomfortable. I’ll stop immediately.” He stated firmly, one hand rubbing small circles on your back. you nodded and cupped his face in your hands. “You are so worth it. Even if I had to wait five, ten, twenty more years. Getting to hold you like this and know that you feel safe with me makes it all worth it.” He whispered, smiling happily. You kissed his forehead, then each of his eyelids, his cheeks, his nose, his chin, and then his lips again. 

“How are you so perfect?” You whispered, resting your forehead against his. 

“I’m not. I just… love you so much.” He obviously felt awkward admitting it this soon. You had figured as much, since there was no way he could still like you at this point and not love you. 

“I love you too, Bin.” You confessed softly, your eyes closed. There was silence between the two of you for a moment, the only sound to be heard coming from their breathing. 

“Like I said, tell me when you want to stop.” He breathed, his eyes connecting with yours. Your lips met his and the hunger kicked in for the both of you immediately. 

His lips traveled down your neck, stopping every now and then to suck on one spot softly before moving on. You took this opportunity to feel him up like you had dreamed of. His shoulders, his biceps, his chest (oh my god). His hands roamed as well, gently caressing you as his kisses slowly followed the neckline of your top. In a swift movement, you removed your top. His jaw was slacked as he took you in and had come to the discovery that you weren't wearing a bra this entire time. “Baby, what did I do to deserve you?” He muttered, his eyes locking with yours. you smiled and leaned in to kiss him, guiding his hands onto your breasts. He groaned into your mouth, gently squeezing each one. You slid your hands under his shirt, desperate to make contact with his skin. He smirked and pulled his shirt off. His figure was so gorgeous you couldn’t help but gasp. 

“Don’t ever show this to Stay.” You mumbled, your hands grazing across his chest. He laughed and nodded. 

“It’s all yours.” You couldn’t help but smile, even though you were so vulnerable, you felt safe. As the two of you continued to kiss, your hips had ideas of their own, grinding against his growing bulge. The way he whimpered against your lips only encouraged you to keep going. You had never been able to imagine him sounding like that in your wildest fantasies. 

His hands slowly slid down your body and lovingly grazed across your thigh towards your core. He smiled when he felt your soaked panties, to which you bit your lip and blushed. “Such a good girl, already wet for me.” His voice was husky with lust. Combined with his already flushed cheeks and slightly swollen lips, you couldn’t handle how sexy he was. “You still okay?” He asked, his fingers resting tantalizingly close, just on your inner thigh. He made a point to make eye contact, patiently waiting for your answer. You nodded, caressing the back of his head softly. A question of how long this consideration would last wandered into your mind, but you cast it aside. If it was only temporary, you would deal with it later. But for now, there was no one else in the world but Seo Changbin. 

He slid your panties to the side, his fingers sliding along your slit to make contact with your core. He hummed happily, his head resting in the crook of your neck. He gently pulled away and laid you down, his hand resting behind your head as you laid down. 

“I’ve dreamed about tasting you for so long.” He seemed to be muttering to himself as he pulled your skirt off and removed your panties with it. You spread your legs wide for him, your heart pounding with excitement. “Ah, so pretty.” He whispered as he rubbed your thigh gently. You could feel your hips shift, desperate for his touch. He dove in face first, his tongue instantly getting to work. Your hands flew into his hair as you moaned. His tongue expertly flicked in and out of you, going faster than you could have ever imagined. You would forever view his rapping differently after tonight. His thumb made lazy circles around your clit as he lapped up every drop of you. Far too quickly, you felt that familiar knot tighten in your stomach. 

“B-Bin… I’m gonna…” You were embarrassed, as you were sure he was expecting more from you. 

“Cum for me whenever you’re ready baby.” He responded, kissing your clit gently a few times before sliding one finger inside of you. That was enough to push you over the edge, your legs wrapping around his head, your back arching, the most lewd sounds you had ever experienced coming from your mouth. When you finally rode out your high and released his head, he sat back for a moment, wiping the slick from his face. You instantly covered your face in embarrassment, your cheeks red not only from your orgasm. “Baby, what’s wrong?” He asked, softly. He kissed your knee softly and rubbed small circles on your thigh. 

“I’ve never done that before, so I didn’t think I would finish that fast.” You admitted, your face still covered. 

“Wait… No one’s ever given you head before?” He asked, shocked. You nodded and slowly uncovered your face. 

“Me finishing wasn’t the most important thing for the only other guy I’ve been with.” You explained, suddenly feeling shy at your inexperience. 

“Oh, honey. I’m so sorry.” His eyes were sad as he placed reassuring kisses on your thigh. “That’s not how it’s supposed to be.” He explained, shaking his head. “In fact, you finishing many times is my goal.” he crawled up over your body until he was basically on top of you. He kissed your lips, gently at first. 

“But what about you?” you pulled back and asked, softly. 

“It’ll happen eventually, but I’m not worried about it. I want you to feel the best I can make you feel.” He kissed you again, hands gently rubbing your sides. “But before that can even happen, I gotta stretch you a bit.” His hand slid down your body and the rest of him followed, slowly inserting one finger inside your now needy core. “Oh my god, you’re so tight.” He hissed through gritted teeth. He slowly started thrusting, setting a steady pace for himself. Soon, it was two fingers, then three. 

“Want you… So bad…” you moaned, arching your back with your eyes closed. 

“Yeah? What do you want? Tell me. Use your words.” You looked at him in surprise. This cocky attitude was unexpected but so welcome. 

“W-want… ugh… want your cock in me.” you groaned, his fingers fucking your faster and faster while you begged for him. “Please, Bin.” you whined, reaching for him. He instantly folded, taking off his pants and underwear faster than you thought was possible. 

“Well, when you ask so nicely, I guess I have to.” He groans, dragging his tip against your slit. He lined himself up with your entrance and you glanced down in time to see how big he was. You worried for a second that you weren't stretched enough, but you were determined to take every bit of him with no fuss. “Are you ready?” He looked at you for confirmation, his breathing heavy but clearly still very much in control. You nodded, biting your lip in anticipation. He inserted his tip and groaned. Slowly, he slid himself in, making sure to take time to allow you to stretch around him. Meanwhile, he was kissing your neck softly and whispering encouraging words in your ear in between his own groans and whimpers. “You take my cock so well baby. Like you’re made for me.” “Almost there, princess. You’re doing so good. Being such a good girl for me.” He finally made it all the way in, your hips meeting. You felt so full of him but in the best way possible. He stayed still for a minute, allowing you to stretch around him and adjust to his size. You bucked your hips, wanting him more and more with every moment. “Be patient, beautiful. I’m gonna take real good care of you, don’t worry.” He cooed, kissing your gently on the lips. So, this is what it was like to make love, you thought to yourself. This is what it means to not be used for your body. You were ripped out of those thoughts by his shallow thrusts, the grunts coming from his mouth sending you over the moon. With every thrust, he pulled out a little more, setting a slow but comfortable pace. You wrapped your legs around him and your arms around his neck. you wanted him closer than close. You made out with him in the sloppiest way you had ever encountered, moaning into eachothers mouths while swimming in pleasure. Without realizing, you started to clench around him. This must have been something he liked, because his controlled pace started to get sloppy and you felt his cock twitch with every clench. “I-if you keep doing that, I’m gonna lose control.” He groaned through gritted teeth. “I won’t be able to stop.” His pace was quickening, arms on either side of your head to stabilize himself. 

“Please don’t stop.” you whimpered, the idea of him stopping right now being too much. You suddenly saw his eyes shift, where they were once calm and clear, they were now dark and lustful. Almost primal. He wrapped you in his arms and held you up while he pounded into your, hips snapping into yours with every thrust. You mewled as he hit your g-spot repeatedly, as if he knew exactly where it was. You felt the knot forming in your stomach, getting close again. Without much warning, you came around him, your grip tightening on his hair at the back of his head. He didn’t slow down however, still pounding into your faster and faster, growls coming from his mouth. You felt him twitch as you saw him get closer and closer. “Cum for me baby.” you groaned, kissing and biting his neck, hands roaming around his chest, torso, shoulders, back. With a loud groan, he finished, painting the inside of you in spurts. He looked at you with wide eyes as he cummed. 

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to finish in you.” He tried to pull himself out, but you wrapped your legs around him and kept him in place as he finished. 

“I honestly don’t even care.” you sighed, feeling full of him. He slowly pulled himself out, rubbing your thighs lovingly. 

“You did so well, baby. So so well.” He praised, kissing your thighs with a smile. He went to the bathroom to clean himself up and came back with a towel to clean you up as well. You reached to take the towel from him, but he shook his head. “This is my job.” which you also found confusing. Your ex just threw a towel at you, which you thought was standard. He slowly and gently cleaned you up, careful of how sore you were already. “There you go my love. Oh, don’t forget to use the bathroom too so you don’t get an infection.” He reminded, a soft smile on his face. You nodded and got up, hobbling over to the bathroom. As you sat on the toilet, you felt your cheeks flush. That wasn’t the direction you had imagined things going tonight, but you couldn’t be happier. 

As you climbed back into bed, you expected Changbin to roll over and go to sleep. So, you did the same. 

“Are you upset?” He asked softly, reaching out for you. 

“No, I just figured you were tired.” You commented, rolling over to look at him. 

“I’ll never be too tired to hold you.” He says matter of factly, pulling you in closer. “If I ever meet whoever your ex is, I’m gonna have to kick his ass.” He mumbles, kissing your hair. 

“Wait, why?” you chuckled, pulling back to look at him. 

“He clearly wasn’t very good to you. And he made you think all of that was normal.” He frowns. “I understand why you wouldn’t want to be with any guy ever again if you thought they were all like that.” You felt yourself melt a bit at his words. He spoke so matter of factly about feelings you had never disclosed to anyone, him included. As you laid together, he peppered your face with small kisses, whispering sweet things to you. You felt so comfortable, so safe. You started to drift off, your eyes feeling heavy. You woke up to the lights off and a cozy Changbin in front of you. His eyes were closed, but a small smile rested on his face. You decided to let yourself fall back asleep in his arms. 

When you woke up the next morning in an empty bed, your heart instantly began racing. Was he disappointed in your performance? Did the post nut clarity hit in the morning? You looked around and saw no traces of him. You thought maybe you had dreamed it all, but upon looking in the mirror, you knew that wasn’t true. Your neck was covered in hickies and your lips were still a little swollen. You wanted to be upset, but you couldn’t be. You decided to just throw on some sweatpants and a t-shirt before heading out to make yourself breakfast. However, as you walked into the kitchen, you were shocked to hear someone already there. You slowly poked your head in and felt your eyes widen at the sight of a shirtless Changbin cooking your breakfast. 

“Um, hi?” you rasped, your voice scratchy from sleep. He turned and smiled. 

“You’re awake! I’m trying to make you some breakfast.” you walked over and saw the scrambled eggs that he was so lovingly making were slightly overcooked, a little brown in some spots. However, that happened to be exactly how you liked them. “Sorry, I know I’m not a great cook.” He rested his head on your shoulder as you turned the heat off and moved the pan to the cool burner. 

“What do you mean? You cooked these perfectly.” you smiled and patted his cheek. “I make them like this on purpose.” He hugged you tightly from behind, giggling. 

“Wow, we must really be meant for eachother then, huh?” He kissed your cheek over and over, making your smile even wider. You felt tears prick the back of your eyes but tried to hold them back. However, Changbin was as observant as ever. He turned you around and held your face in his hands, brows furrowed in concern. “What’s going on, honey?” His voice was soft, his thumbs grazing your cheeks softly. 

“I just thought you had left, so I’m happy you’re youre.” you smiled softly at him as you spoke. He frowned. 

“I wouldn’t leave without saying goodbye. You’re officially stuck with me now, Noona.” He kissed your forehead gently and then flashed you a wide smile. “Let’s eat before it gets cold, yeah?” He gently guided you over to the food, where they both made a plate and sat down at your table. While they were eating, his phone started buzzing from the counter. He attempted to ignore it, saying it probably wasn’t important. 

“I bet it’s Channie-hyung. You should go answer it.” You took a bite of your food as you watched him walk over, giving you a wide eyed look when he saw you was right. 

“Give me a minute.” He whispered and stepped into the hallway to answer. Part of you wanted to eavesdrop, but you decided to focus on eating . He came back a few minutes later and sighed. “I have to leave here soon. We have a soundcheck in like 20 minutes.” Your eyes widened, as the venue was at least 10 from your house. 

“Shit, then we need to go right now.” You stood up, abandoning your food and running to find your shoes. 

“No, it’s okay! I’ll just get a driver to come get me.” 

“It’s fine, I can just drop you off.” You were already putting your shoes on and grabbing your keys. 

“But I don’t want-” He stopped himself, looking down. 

“Anyone to see me?” you stopped and realized this was the other shoe dropping. 

“Not for any reason you’re thinking. I just don’t want you to get hurt because you’re seen with me.” You handed him his shirt, which you had grabbed from the room, and nodded. 

“It’s all good. I understand.” Did you completely mean it? You weren't entirely sure, but you decided to be cool about it rather than making him feel bad. You knew you had issues that you needed to work on too, he didn’t need to deal with all of it. 

“You sure?” He seemed confused, trying to search for all of his stuff while also talking with you. You walked over to him and hugged him from behind. 

“Yes, I’m sure. Now, get outta here. You’ve got work to do.” You kissed his shoulder. “But I’ll see you later.” He turned his head in surprise. 

“You’ll be there tonight?” He asked with a wide smile. 

“Yeah! Perks of having my team basically handling all of the artists is I can get myself very good seats. You’ll be able to see me, no problem.” You giggled at his reaction, which was him quickly turning around with eyebrows raised and an amused smile on his face. “And I have a very cute outfit planned.” You added, which only made him smile more. 

“Can you come say hi to us before the show? The boys would love to see you.” He asks happily, clearly excited at this new development. 

“I’ll see if I can sneak my way in.” You wink, laughing. He gave you a kiss on the cheek before heading out the door to meet his driver. 

You put on your outfit: a black crop top with a hot pink harness, a black leather mini skirt, and some black knee high platform boots. You did some hella cute makeup and did your hair, making sure to wear your Stray Kids headband you had ordered, since everyone needed to know who you were there for. Once you were ready, you made your way to the venue, all access badge around your neck. You wandered into the back, stopping one of your staff members to ask them where Stray Kids' green room was. Once you got there, you knocked on the door three times before opening the door. You were greeted by a chorus of “NOONA!!”s, which made your heart very happy. Felix ran over and hugged you tight. 

“Noona, you look so pretty! I didn’t know you were coming!” He was so excited to see you, his smile was so wide. You sat down with Han, pestering him as he was trying to play a game on his phone. Only Felix, Han, I.N, and Seungmin were in the room at the moment. After Han finally gave up, you decided to chat with Seungmin. They were all sat on one couch, chatting about this and that. Seungmin saw your headband and decided to tease you about it, saying “You must really like us, Noona.” to which you agreed. 

“Where's the rest of your group?” You asked, confused. 

“Oh, they’re still getting ready. Hair, makeup, outfit. All that fun stuff.” Han informed, once again distracted by something on his phone. After sitting and hanging out, the other boys finally came back. 

“Bestie! You’re here!” Hyunjin exclaimed excitedly running over and hugging you. 

“You look so pretty.” You gushed, looking at his outfit. He laughed and nodded. 

“You do too. I guess we’re two pretty best friends.” He joked and then both of you cringed while laughing. 

“Ah, our y/n is here.” Leeknow commented as he walked in, a small smile resting on his face. You greeted him happily, to which he gave you a small bow and then found a spot to relax before their performance. Next was Bangchan, who was happy to see you and gave you a hug. 

“Changbinnie will be here soon.” He teased, winking at you. You felt your cheeks flush and tried to laugh it off. You couldn’t bring yourself to make eye contact with anyone, suddenly taking an interest in their fridge. 

“Old habits die hard.” You joked, straightening all the labels and pulling things forward in an effort to hide how nervous you are. Thankfully, the others didn’t seem to pick up on it, even though Chan kept trying to tease you. Changbin entered the room and instantly came over and wrapped you in his arms. 

“My baby is here!” He cheered, loud enough for everyone to hear. Your face flushed and you looked at him with wide eyes. “What?” He asked, confused with your reaction. You nodded your head towards the boys, who were looking at the two of you with intrigued expressions. “Oh, right.” He nodded and then turned towards them. “y/n and I are dating now.” He informed them, smiling widely. You didn’t think your face could feel any hotter, your hands coming up to shield yourself from the embarrassment. 

“Ah, so that’s where you were last night, Seo Changbin!” Leeknow pretended to scold, a mischievous smile on his face. You were so embarrassed, the boys laughing and heckling the two of you, that you were extremely relieved to see one of your staff members enter. 

“Miss y/n, I was asked to escort you to your seat so the artists can get ready for the show.” You nodded, jumping at the opportunity to leave the room. Changbin stopped you, pouting. His lip was jutted out as he pointed to his cheek. 

“Kiss please. For luck.” You could feel everyone's eyes on you, the embarrassment becoming almost too much. You rolled your eyes and gave him a quick peck on the cheek, which made the boys all scream. You quickly headed towards the door, turning once to give a weak 

“Stray Kids, fighting!” before rushing out the door. 

The entire show was great, the boys all making a point to come over and wave at you at one point or another. Changbin was extra, of course, blowing kisses to you every chance he had. The girls behind you were losing their minds, thinking it was for them. You smiled, happy that they were happy. But you also felt smug, knowing that you had him wrapped around your finger. You were excited for what the future would hold with him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

thanks for reading! hope you love it!

[thisonelikesaliens]

20 questions tag game

tagged by @cankersoregirl (thank you friend! love chatting mxtx with you 💙)

1. why did you choose your url?

i started drawing mass effect aliens and then one day @thievinghippo dared me to draw hanar in lingerie and then my old blog became all about hanar. they use "this one" instead of "i" when referring to themselves

2. any sideblogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them.

nope. just my old blog i sort of had to abandon when i thought it might've been compromised (aka people i knew in real life might've found it)

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

2014

4. do you have a queue tag?

nope

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

probably heard about tumblr from one of the dragon age fics i was reading? don't remember exactly

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

deep in mxtx hell. also shameless self promo of my own doodles. will probably go back to the hanar waving pride flag at some point

7. why did you choose your header?

more shameless self promo (i didn't think i would ever touch my sketchbook again so allow me this self-indulgence)

8. what is your post with the most notes?

hanar positivity. posted this at 1 am and woke up to 700+ notifs on my phone. to this day i'm baffled this got over 5k notes. but that was 9 years ago the tumblr landscape was very different

9. how many mutuals do you have?

uh...don't know? too many old mutuals have left tumblr over the years. wherever they are i hope they're doing well

10. how many followers do you have?

more than i expected

11. how many people do you follow?

3 digits

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

who hasn't?

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

depends on how focused i need to be for work

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

no

15. how do you feel about 'you need to reblog this' posts?

my blog my rules

16. do you like tag games?

sure, just might take me some time to get to it since i'm mostly on mobile and i don't even turn on my laptop every day now

17. do you like ask games?

sure, same as tag games

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

what even counts as tumblr famous?

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

no

20. tags?

kinda feel like i've been tagging a lot of people lately so...not this time

[chris-hartley]

Happy Pride!!

GUESS WHO GOT A BINGO!!! Hehe. I have been kinda neglecting this challenge a bit cause life got hectic but I'm back with this fic of my Total Drama OC Skylar with his boyfriend Kai (@samgiddings' character). This fic chronologizes their first (and second) kiss, and then their first date! Feel free to follow our blog for these OCs (@teadocs) for more fun moments!

(To hide these posts going forward blacklist #kenziewritespride)

Skylar had opted to skip the party that the people in the program were throwing for New Years and was heading back in the direction of his dorm when he felt a hand on his shoulders.

“Crikey!” He muttered.

“Skylar,” the familiar voice brought a smile to his lips. It was Kai, the guy Skylar had spent a lot of time with during his stay back in Australia.

“Hi Kai,” he looked over, “What’re you doing? Thought you were out with the others.”

“I got a roadie,” Kai held up the two beers in his other hand, “For both of us.”

Skylar nodded, “Well I’m going to hang out in my room.”

“Can I come with you?”

“Yeah,” he nodded.

Kai smiled, walking along with him, “Not really getting on with the other blokes?”

“It’s not that. I’m not much for partying anyhow. Even my friends at home knew I was kinda a buzzkill.”

“I’m sure you weren’t,” he reassured.

Skylar shrugged, “I don’t know.”

Kai nudged him playfully, “Don’t be so hard on yourself. You’re a great guy.”

He smiled softly, “Ta Kai.”

When they made it back to Skylar’s dorm, the two of them went in. The living situation was pretty nice, Skylar shared a room with a guy named Rocky and the two of them shared a living room and kitchen with two blokes named Hunter and Jack. But all 3 of them were out having drinks to celebrate with the others.

Kai sat down on the couch, flipping on the TV to the New Years countdown which read there was still 30 minutes left. Skylar sat beside him, taking the beer that Kai had gotten him and taking a drink.

“So, you got any more interesting stories about working at the zoo?” Kai said with wonder in his eyes.

On one of the first days, Skylar had gotten paired with Kai for a task which he was used to doing at home so he kinda took the lead on it all, leaving Kai to ask about what it was like to work in an actual zoo and not just the petting zoo he was used to. Skylar had told some funny stories about things that happened and every time, the way Kai’s eyes lit up made him happy so he kept going.

“Well, there was one time I was going to check on the hippo exhibit cause Peter, the guy who usually goes to clean up in the morning was running a little late, and I walk in and one of the hippos had pulled out a huge chunk of the grass we keep out for them and it was just everywhere.”

“A real dog’s breakfast,” Kai chuckled.

Skylar chuckled. His whole family was Australian, but there had definitely been a lot of new terms he’d learned in the 2 months he’d been here.

“So I’m like crikey! What happened here! And I had to go grab the rake and get it all back in the feeding area and I found one of the baby hippos had laid down for a nap in the grass.”

He awed, “A baby hippo.”

“So I just let her have her little nap and cleaned around her,” he smiled.

Kai took a sip of his beer, “That’s a bonzer story, Sky.”

“Thanks. I know you like hippos so I thought you’d like it,” he nodded.

Kai smiled, “So tell me more about your life at home.”

“Like another zoo story?”

He shook his head, “No. Like… What else do you do for fun?”

“Oh,” he shrugged, “I mean I’ve been on Total Drama a couple times.”

“Total Drama? Like… the TV show from when we were little?” Kai raised his eyebrows.

He nodded, “Yeah. They did a reboot of it and I was on seasons 3 and 4.”

“Crikey! That’s so cool! Is it as fun as it looks?”

Skylar chuckled, “It’s kinda fun. But it for sure has its downsides.”

“I bet,” Kai smiled, teasing, “Is that all? No more secret hobbies?”

He shook his head, “No, not really.”

“You… got a girlfriend?”

“No,” Skylar shook his head, “Girls aren’t really my thing.”

“Boyfriend?”

Skylar took a sip of his beer, “No. Why?”

Kai was quiet for a second and Skylar followed his glance to the TV. 3 minutes left on the countdown. He looked back at him, raising his eyebrows.

“I think you’re cute, Sky,” Kai explained.

Skylar’s heart started racing and he could feel his cheeks turning a little pink, “You do?”

He nodded, “And if it’s alright with you I’d like to kiss you at midnight?”

“K-kiss me? Is that a thing people do?”

Kai chuckled softly, smiling, “Yeah. You ring in the New Year with a kiss. Doesn’t have to mean more than a kiss if you don’t want it to.”

“Oh,” Skylar swallowed hard, a little nervous as he continued, “Well I think you’re… cute too. But I- I’m not- I haven’t ever dated anyone so I don’t know… I might be bad at it.”

“Not possible,” Kai said reassuringly, “So is that a yes? I can kiss you?”

Skylar nodded, glancing at the clock as it started to count down. His hands got a little sweaty as he watched it.

“Skylar?” Kai said.

He turned to look at him as the people on the TV cheered. Kai slowly leaned in for a gentle kiss. Skylar kissed him back, a little more hesitant. When they broke apart, Skylar smiled shyly. He’d never really understood the phrase for having butterflies in his stomach but as he looked over at Kai he started to get it. 

---

After they kissed at New Years, Skylar freaked out. Okay freaked out was too loose of a term. He had completely lost his mind. Because these harbored feelings he’d had for Kai came to a bursting realization all at once. 

And it got to the point where he couldn’t even bear to be in the same room as Kai, because the second he looked over at him and caught him looking at him, it was like his stomach flipped and his face turned a bright red. He didn’t know what he was supposed to do, just like he hadn’t really for the entirety of this internship.

He’d made the private decision to keep some distance unless in group settings so he would be able to avoid… whatever that was. And it was going well. Okay scratch well, it was simply going. Kai and Skylar were teamed up to do a project together, which left them spending a lot of nights at one house or the other working on it together.

And that’s where they were tonight. On the couch in Kai’s living room. Sitting in a bout of awkward silence while they individually worked on their parts to this… rather dumb project if Skylar was being honest. There was no purpose, besides making him spend hours in the same room as Kai, trying his best not to make eye contact cause every time he did? Well…

“What do you reckon this has to do with working in a zoo?” Kai asked, looking down at his laptop, “Do you have to pitch ideas for events with the zoo to do?”

Skylar looked up from where he was gluing something on their posterboard, “What? No. Nobody is gonna ask us to do that.”

“Really?” Kai asked, looking at Skylar, “You never pitched stuff for your Canada zoo?”

“I kinda just got told what to do,” he shrugged, feeling his chest tighten as Kai looked at him so he dropped his gaze, “It wasn’t…”

“Interesting,” Kai muttered, looking back at his laptop.

Skylar pressed down on the picture as if it hadn’t already been firmly stuck on the poster, just wanting to do something with his hands while he waited for Kai to print out the words that were supposed to go across the top.

Kai stood up, going over to the printer and grabbing them and for a second, Skylar was alone and felt a bit of relief. He felt like such an idiot. Kai liked him! Kai had liked him enough to kiss him at New Years. And he’d gone and been weird and ruined it all. And now he was completely screwed over. Now he was the one with feelings, and Kai… well… he probably hates Skylar now.

He came back into the room, handing Skylar a pair of scissors, sharp end out. He instinctively went to grab the handle instead of the sharp end, to be safe, their hands touching probably a second longer than they should’ve. Skylar could feel his stomach flip again, his heart racing a little as they made eye contact, Kai’s eyes flicking down to Skylar’s lips.

He took the scissors and started cutting out the letters, putting all his focus on the paper in front of him as he gathered his thoughts. They sat there, the only sound breaking the silence was the dual noises of them cutting out the label for their poster.

“Whi-” Kai started but Skylar’s one track mind and anxiety cut him off.

“Do you like me?” His eyes darted up to Kai’s, trying to gauge his reaction. Facial reactions were always really hard for him to make out. From what he could tell, Kai looked surprised. There was a pause before he responded.

“I- Yeah. Why?”

Skylar could feel his mouth completely dry out as he continued to blurt out exactly what he was thinking, with no filter, “Because I like you. A lot. And I’ve been freaking myself out about it and I’m sorry. But we’ve been sitting here for the last twenty minutes doing this stupid project and all I can think about is kissing you again.”

If his face hadn’t been red when he asked the first question, it sure was now. He took a deep breath.

“Sky…” Kai had an unreadable look on his face.

“So can I? Kiss you I mean.”

A smile came to Kai’s face, “Yeah.”

Skylar set his scissors down, cupping Kai’s face in his palm, taking a calming breath as he shut his eyes and leaned in to kiss him. And while he’d been nervous up until this moment, the second he felt Kai kissing him back, the nerves melted off him.

As they broke away a few moments later, Skylar cleared his throat, “Uh. So what now?”

Kai chuckled, “What do you want, Sky?”

“I’d… like to maybe go on a date. Would that be okay with you?”

“That would be more than okay with me,” he smiled, “Should we get back to the project?”

Skylar chuckled, “Maybe.”

---

Skylar stood in front of the closet of his dorm in Australia, staring at the clothes hanging in it. He had a date. A date. One that he initiated! That still blew his mind. How had he gained the guts to do that? He barely recognized himself.

He pulled out one outfit, looking it up and down. It was cute enough, right? He put it on, standing in front of the full length mirror hanging on the back of his door.

He was startled as a knock came from the other side, “Sky?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I come in?”

“Uh, yeah,” he nodded, opening the door to spot his roommate Rocky standing on the other side, a bottle in his hand.

“I heard you have a date tonight,” he seemed a little surprised.

Skylar nodded timidly.

“Do you wanna wear some cologne? Chicks dig it.”

His face went bright red and he shook his head.

“You sure, mate?”

“I’m sure,” he swallowed hard, “I don’t think I’ll need it.”

“Alright then,” he patted him on the shoulder, “So how’d you meet her?”

The more Rocky spoke the more he realized nobody here knew that he was gay, except Kai. Shoot.

“Work stuff,” he shrugged his hand off.

“Work stuff. What? Is she in the program?”

“Something like that,” he bit his lip.

Rocky’s face lit up, “Well crikey! Who is it? Poppy? Riley?”

“Uh,” just as Skylar was about to admit it, the doorbell rang, “I’ll get it.”

He went to open the door and Kai was standing on the other side.

“You ready?” He grinned at him.

Rocky came up behind Skylar, “Kai, mate. You come to see Skylar off for his big date?”

Skylar’s face turned bright red.

“Big date, huh? You’ve been telling people about it?”

“I didn’t te-”

“I heard it through the grapevine,” Rocky said confidently, “Apparently it’s someone in the program.”

Kai, playing innocent, smirked. Skylar cleared his throat.

“So um. I’m gonna go on the date. With… Kai,” he said timidly.

“Oh is it a double date?”

Kai chuckled, “No.”

“OHHHHHH! You two are…”

Skylar nodded, wishing he could disappear.

“Well, I hope you two have a good time. See you later, Sky. Kai,” Rocky nodded.

“You ready?” Kai asked again.

“Yep.”

---

Skylar walked awkwardly alongside Kai as they headed over to the restaurant he’d picked out. Why he’d picked it out he couldn’t for the life remember because this walk felt like it was going on forever. Was he sweating? Oh god he was sweating. He hoped his deodorant would hide anything. He should’ve taken the cologne offer from Rocky after all. Kai probably was thinking-

He looked over at Kai, who seemed to be on cloud nine, walking peacefully. How was he so calm about this?!

Kai’s gaze turned to Skylar and his eyebrows furrowed, “You alright, mate?”

“Mm? Yeah. Fine. Uh. We’re just about there.”

“Crikey,” Kai said jokingly, “And here I thought you were gonna ask to hold my hand.”

Skylar’s face turned bright red, “Uh- oh- um, is that something people do?”

“Yeah,” Kai nodded, continuing to walk, “But we don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

Skylar stood there contemplating what to do before he quickly walked to catch up with him, taking Kai’s hand in his. He turned to him with a smile, squeezing Skylar’s hand.

“I took that as a hint. Hope it’s alright.”

“More than alright,” Kai nodded.

When they reached the restaurant, Kai opened the door for Skylar, letting him walk inside. Skylar cleared his throat as he approached the hostess.

“Table for two. Under the name Witter?”

“Right this way,” she smiled, leading the two of them to a booth in the back.

---

“Two barramundi tacos?” the waitress said, carrying their plates over to them, setting them in front of them.

“Ta,” Kai nodded.

“Thank you,” Skylar smiled at the waitress, starting to pick up one of the tacos.

Kai did the same and they both took a bite.

“Mm,” Skylar moaned, nodding, holding a hand up as he chewed, “This is good.”

“See! I told you you’d like it. It’s an Aussie staple,” he grinned.

Skylar chuckled, liking how happy he was. It was cute. He could feel the butterflies in his stomach acting up. He took another bite, happily chewing.

“So, um, what else do people do… on dates?”

Kai raised his eyebrows, “Have you never been on a date before?”

Skylar blushed, looking down at his tacos, “Uh… no…”

“Oh,” Kai cleared his throat, “Sorry.”

“Why are you sorry?”

“Because I guess I just- you probably should’ve had a better first date.”

Skylar looked confused at him, “What? What do you mean a ‘better’ first date?”

“You know…”

“Kai I really don’t,” he started wondering if he was stupid and hesitated slightly before continuing, “I like you, Kai. A lot. As far as I know, unless I missed some major thing, that’s all you need for a good first date.”

“You like me a lot?”

Skylar fought the knot in his throat, “I do. So I’m having a good time. With you, eating these really good tacos.”

“Would you wanna do this again sometime then?” Kai asked, a smile on his face.

“If you want to,” Skylar nodded, “I wasn’t really sure… how you felt about me.”

“Mate, I’ve liked you for a while. I just didn’t think you were on the same page as me,” he chuckled, “But that definitely clears things up.”

Skylar chuckled softly, nodding.

---

Kai walked Skylar back to his dorm, leaning against the railing of the decking, “So… tonight was a lot of fun.”

Skylar looked down at his hands, which were running along the seam of his shirt, “Kai?”

“Sky?”

Skylar looked up at him and took a deep breath, “Would it be alright if I kissed you goodnight?”

“Absolutely.”

Skylar timidly stepped closer to Kai, shutting his eyes as he leaned in to kiss him again. Once again his stomach was filled with butterflies as Kai leaned into the kiss.

A few moments later, they broke apart and Skylar nervously licked his lips, “Uh. I guess I’ll see you at work tomorrow?”

“You will,” Kai nodded.

“Goodnight Kai,” he turned to open the door to his dorm, but then quickly turned back to kiss his cheek before going inside.

Kai chuckled, surprised, “Goodnight Sky.”

[dangerous-disposition]

i can't tell where you end and where i start [WIP WEDNESDAY]

THIS FIC IS COMPLETE AND POSTED!!

READ IT ON MY WRITING BLOG @gerrystamour OR AO3

Intended fic rating: Explicit | Pairing(s): Steve/OMC, eventual Steve/Eddie

So i was possessed to kinda dig into some of Steve's experimentation trips to Indy. This is a spin-off fic related to my fic i could be honest, i could be human and when I start posting, it will be on my writing blog, @gerrystamour and AO3 This fic WILL end with Steddie, obviously (if you've read icbh, you will know where I'm heading with this stuff. This is still very rough and barely edited. Anyway!!! I hope you enjoy!!!

August 1985

The music was loud, bodies pressed close as everyone danced and shoved. Steve had been overwhelmed, scared even, when he’d first arrived, but now he was grinning as he pressed through to the bar.

“What can I get for you, gorgeous?” the bartender asked as he eyed Steve up and down appreciatively. Steve was happy that he was already flushed from dancing so his blush at the compliment wasn’t so obvious.

“Just a Coke, please!” he hollered over the music. “I have to drive back home tonight.”

“You got it, sweetie,” the bartender replied and quickly fixed him a glass.

Sipping at his Coke, Steve turned to lean back on the bar with his elbows and watched the crowd of men and women dancing. It was liberating, seeing men hold each other close and women kissing, and for a second he felt guilty for not bringing Robin. It wasn’t the first time he felt guilty, but he told himself again that it was important he figure some of his shit out on his own.

Immediately upon arriving he had been coaxed out to the dance floor by a young man with strong arms and a broad chest. He was absolutely gorgeous, Steve could easily admit that, and they danced for several songs together. They were eventually separated by the crowd, but that was fine. This was just a bit of an information gathering trip, Steve told himself, he wasn’t actually trying to go home with anyone this time.

As he scanned the crowd, his eyes caught on someone standing a bit away from Steve at a high-top. Steve’s heart stuttered at the long hair, the denim vest over a leather jacket, the ripped pants. But the longer Steve looked, the more features he noticed and relaxed a bit; the man was too tall, too blond, his hair too straight.

That did not change the way Steve’s heart raced when the man waved at him almost coyly.

Steve smiled sheepishly as he sipped his Coke, ducking his head a bit to glance at the man through his lashes.

The grin that came to Steve’s lips when the man immediately crossed the space to the bar was huge, and his breath left him as the man crowded close.

“Hey, handsome,” Steve greeted, the man’s smirk causing a swarm of butterflies in Steve’s gut to take wing. “What can I do you for?”

“Haven’t seen you here before,” the man replied, leaning a hand on the bar and idly stroking Steve’s elbow with his thumb. “You new to town?”

“Just visiting,” Steve replied, shivering at the contact. “You?”

“Born and raised,” he answered, and Steve shivered as the man’s other hand settled on his waist. “I’m Tig.”

Steve smiled, wondering if that was the Tig’s actual name or not. “Steve,” he replied, and Tig’s grin broadened.

He didn’t have dimples, which Steve noted with disappointment that left him feeling a bit guilty.

“Wanna dance, Steve?” Tig asked, which pulled a bit of a shocked laugh from Steve.

“Doesn’t seem like your scene,” he replied as Madonna blared over the speakers.

Tig laughed, and it was soft, almost sweet. “Definitely not,” he agreed, reaching up to brush Steve’s sweaty hair off of his forehead. “Looks like yours, though. Could have a bit of fun here, and if you wanted, I could take you back to my place? Play something a bit more my speed?”

Steve reminded himself that he wasn’t intending to go home with anyone this time, that this was just for information gathering. But he was drawn to Tig. Steve wanted to dance with him, and he was probably going to go home with him.

They danced for what felt like hours, but was really just seven songs before Tig called for a smoke break. Steve happily followed him outside, accepting a cigarette as it was handed to him. Tig lit his own cigarette then Steve’s, holding the lighter between them. They made smalltalk, the conversation easy and fun while they smoked together.

“What do you say we go somewhere a bit quieter?” Tig asked, steel-blue eyes hooded as he gave Steve a once-over. “Unless you want to keep dancing?”

“I think you were going to show me music more your speed,” Steve reminded him, smirking a bit as he shrugged. “Could always keep dancing,” he added teasingly and Tig laughed.

“You’ve no idea what you’re asking for,” Tig said with a quiet chuckle, rolling his eyes.

Steve went back to Tig’s apartment, and it was a mess. On the coffee table, there was a truly impressive bong surrounded by several glasses with various levels of various beverages. There was clothing strewn about as well and a plate with a half-eaten sandwich on the table.

“Sorry, my roommates are animals,” Tig grumbled as he took Steve’s hand and pulled him through the mess and into a bedroom. It was much tidier than the main living area and Steve looked around in fascination.

There were several posters on the walls, some clearly from a live show and others likely bought at a record store, all of them of bands Steve had never heard of with strange and even scary imagery. One poster looked familiar, though, but Steve was struggling to place it right away. There were two guitars in one corner of the room, one electric and the other acoustic, and Steve went to look at them closer.

“You play?” Tig asked, and Steve chuckled and shook his head.

“No, not at all. I don’t even sing or anything like that,” Steve replied, glancing over his shoulder. “I’m more of a jock, you could say.”

“No way,” Tig drawled sarcastically, smirking teasingly.

Steve just laughed and kept looking around. He could hear Tig messing around with the stereo on the other side of the room, but he focused on looking at the shelf of different cassettes and records. Finally, he looked at the bed and he blushed, his heart racing as he seemed to realize where he was.

He was actually in a man’s room, standing next to his bed while the man decided what music to put on.

There was a moment where that feeling almost turned into panic, but then his eyes fell on an old, well-loved tiger stuffed animal. It wasn’t just any tiger either.

Smiling brightly, Steve held it up as he met Tig’s gaze, and there was a light blush dusting his cheeks. “Tigger?” he asked warmly, before gesturing at the man himself. “Tig?”

“You cracked the code, Steve,” Tig replied, giving Steve a one-shouldered shrug as he put a tape in and hitting play.

The soft sound of a guitar played from the speakers and Tig turned it up a touch. Then the man came around the bed to stand directly in front of Steve, smirking down at him. Gently, Tig took the stuffed animal out of Steve’s hands and put it on one of the shelves next to them.

“Not gonna ask for my real name?” Tig asked curiously, and Steve shrugged.

“Was Tig not a real name?” he asked, and Tig grinned at that, as if relieved or something.

“Tig is definitely a real name, or real enough,” Tig confirmed, lifting a hand to cup Steve’s jaw while the other slid around his waist.

There was a moment when Steve realized he was going to have his first kiss with a man, and it was going to be a guy he met only a couple hours ago, and he felt that almost-panicked feeling bubble up inside him again.

But then Tig was kissing him, and it was gentle and sweet, something Steve wouldn’t have expected looking at him. Somewhere in the back of his mind, Steve wondered if Eddie would kiss like this too.

Banishing that thought from his mind, Steve deepened the kiss and moaned when their tongues met. To his surprise, Steve discovered that Tig’s tongue was pierced, something he was very curious about. He didn’t realize he actually asked about it aloud until Tig laughed.

“How about I show you, sweetheart?”

TBC

Please consider reblogging if you liked this! Let me know if you want me to add you to the taglist for when it goes live!

Tagging a couple homies who said they wanna be tagged in stuff (let me know if you want to be added to this taglist too??)~*~

@patchworkgargoyle, @scarcrossdlvrs, @indigohightide, @steddieas-shegoes, @amerikanskaya-krassavitsa

[no-psi-nan]

🥺🥺🥺 not 2 be sappy on main but omg I actually started off in Deviantart ages ago, that was the closest thing to social media for me until the tumblr migration lol. But I never really interacted with people on there, and even upon moving to tumblr, never really interacted with people here too often either. At first I had my main blog which was meant to be more professional since I was selling art to get a little college income, so I didn't really make too many irrelevant posts. Then I decided that I wanted to be able to reblog art and support other artists, so I made a side blog where I carefully curated and tagged the posts I reblogged. I made a few original posts but no one ever interacted, and eventually I realized that people only ever sent me asks there if I tagged anything wrong. Also I found out that adding stuff like series and character tags to a reblog on tumblr is basically useless because the op will pretty much always tag those things which makes it searchable on your own blog even if you don't tag it yourself. And if op DIDN'T tag it those things, your tags will make the post searchable on your blog but NOT in the general search, so it doesn't give op any more of a boost than just reblogging it tagless. So I made another sideblog, which I still have today, and I just rapidfire reblog literally anything I find shareworthy lol. Not any interaction there but at least I'm not wasting my time meticulously tagging strangers posts hsfjdlshfks. Since I was best friends with a big name fan in my main fandom (we became friends when I left a long emotional comment on their fanfic btw <3), I helped run some small fandom events and met more people as well. When I switched fandoms, it was a fandom event that gave me a new friend too, my posts never got any traction. Large fandom discords didn't really work for me either. But on this blog I was lucky, and for the first time people started like actually responding to my comments and posts, and get conversations going! And genuinely that's what's kept my brain rot so powerful I think, because bouncing ideas off each other and joking around and shitposting is genuinely the most fun I've ever had online!! I have to thank desta and oatmeal for the fun times especially, and hillbilly---man left really nice comments on my first few fics that really encouraged me, and I always have fun trading ideas with alienn, saikikthoughts, and crookedlyinnernightmare, plus everyone else who's on here, that's too many people to type out. AND I TYPED UP A BUNCH MORE STUFF BUT TUMBLR FUCKING DELETED IT!! Are you shitting me.... Well I think I remember saying that even if it's been getting kinda quiet and boring lately so my attention is starting to wander (I've pretty much posted all of the meta that's not deep fanfic hc at this point and my drawings take me a long time to make), I'll never delete this blog and I'll still be putzing around online until the day I die probably. And I'll always remember these days fondly and hope to find another great community like this one. And also I highly encourage everyone to post, reply, interact, and play with fellow fans! I've made lifelong friendships over blorbos and even if we don't have the same blorbos any more, we're still friends. Obviously stay safe online, never send money to strangers, probably wait like a year to start shipping each other stuff but still, reach out because you never know who you might meet! I've been lonely irl for most of my life for various reasons, and my online friends have been a lifeline honestly, they're all really important to me. Two of my best friends today come from fanfic comment sections!! Also I need to get around to archiving my meta on AO3 lol (yup, it's for meta too!) but that's gonna be a lot of work so -_-U).

[royboyfanpage]

A tumblr version of my fic because I wanna keep all my masterpost posts on this blog.

It’s a strange sense, a feeling he hasn’t felt in… maybe ever. The feeling of completion, of having everything he needed. Sat in the dark on his faded once-blue-now-grey second hand couch, burn marks in the arm left over from some sleepless nights covered up by finger-painted smiles, the scent of pumpkins and cinnamon and candy apples wafting through the air, Roy realised he’d never felt so whole, so content. The familiar weight of the girl in his arms, the occasional nudge against his leg as the boy on the floor tilts his head to get a better look at the TV, the sensations grounding, a reminder that tonight, he’s with the two people who mean the most to him in this world. Lian’s cheeks were smudged with pumpkin juice from digging out the jack-o-lantern’s insides, but Roy didn’t have the energy to attempt to wrangle the toddler long enough to clean it. Grant’s hair was plaited, pumpkin-shaped clips holding it in place. The two kids, his daughter, and his… something. Roy would never name him. Maybe he needed to, maybe saying it would be the worst thing he could do. Maybe fatherhood was too polluted for the boy, maybe the concept of being a ‘son’ was too damaged- the legacy of a dead man, the prey of a monster. Maybe, maybe, maybe, but no absolutes. His daughter’s brother, undoubtedly, Lian’d called him her brother herself, but the implications of what that made Roy were never addressed. That swell of pride whenever Grant got his powers under control, that squeeze in his chest so tight it hurt whenever the boy’d go to him for a hug, it didn’t need to be mentioned. Roy didn’t need to be named, didn’t need a tangible place in Grant’s life. Roy was there, and that was what mattered.

“Roy, pay attention, this is the best bit!” Grant snaps Roy out of his thoughts with an enthusiastic tapping on his knee, pointing to the TV. Some 80s Goonies-esque kids’ comedy horror was on, one of the few Lian-friendly (and Roy-friendly, though he’d never admit that he couldn’t stand horror any more than his three year old daughter) Halloween movies Grant had in his suggestions. Lian was already asleep, her face squished against Roy’s chest. Fortunately, the girl didn’t have much of a sweet tooth, so the forsaken sugar-rush had been avoided. Roy leaned his head back against the headrest, blinking slowly to try and keep his own eyes open.

“Yuh-huh, I’m watching,” Roy yawned, trying his best to fake interest in the… mass exorcism? He’d kinda zoned out after the part with the werewolf in the Police station, and the plot of the film had been lost in the process. Despite having no idea what was happening, Roy still attempted to pretend for Grant’s sake. “Oh, look, they’re finally gonna get, uh Frankenstein.”

Grant turned around with an appalled expression, his eyebrows shot up in alarm. “Frank’s one of the good guys! Have you even been watching?”

Great. Apparently, that was the wrong thing to say. “This film’s pro-Frankenstein? I thought he was a monster. That seems like a weird stance.”

“Yeah, duh it’s pro-Frankenstein’s monster. He’s never been a bad guy.”

“He hasn’t? He’s a monster, right?”

Grant sighed in exasperation, pulling his legs up to his chest in that ‘I think what you said is stupid and I’m not gonna humour you with a response’ pose Roy’d seen an almost hilarious amount of times since the kid first came to live with him, resting his chin on his knees. Roy sighed in solidarity and leaned back in his seat, swallowed by the unfathomably plush cushions (thanks, Flasher, for donating furniture so padded that Lian could get lost in the cracks.) His fingers drummed against the arm to an unknown rhythm, some song that might have gone ‘dun dun dun dun, dun dun’, but could just as well have gone ‘dun, dun, dun, dun dun dun’, and Grant tapped his foot to the silent symphony. Lian’s quiet snoring played the bass. It was a better song than Great Frog ever made, anyway.

“Roy? Roy. Roy!” Grant smacked his guardian’s arm, waking the archer from a slumber he hadn’t even realised he’d succumbed to. Glazed eyes adjusted to the new darkness now the film was off, spotting the absence of plates or wrappers which had littered the coffee table last time Roy was aware of his surroundings.

“Wh- what time’s it, kid?” Roy yawned, rubbing the sleep from his eyes with the hand not cradling Lian. He didn’t wait for Grant to answer before checking his watch, and gawked at the ‘XII’ that stared at him. “Midnight? Jesus, you should’a woken me earlier.”

“I would’ve, but popular media says it’s a bad idea to wake the dead,” Grant grinned at his own joke, flopping down on the couch next to Roy.

“Very funny. D’you clean up in here?”

Grant shrugged. “Yeah, a bit.”

“You know you don’t have to, right? Like, I don’t- it isn’t an expectation or a requirement.”

“I know, but I wanted to.”

That, Roy couldn’t argue with. But there was still that doubt, that fear of intentions, of motivations. He was never entirely sure if Grant was doing something because he wanted to, or because he felt he had to, whether his helpfulness was just him being a good kid or if it was a fear that if he didn’t pull his weight he’d be cast aside. Roy’d felt exactly that when he was Grant’s age, that fear that if he didn’t work hard enough as Speedy, if he didn’t manage to hold his own beside Wally and Donna, he’d be cast aside and forgotten and- well, you already know how that turned out.

Lian wriggled slightly in her slumber, snapping Roy out of his thoughts. With the amounts of tangents his brain’s gone off on the last few months, you’d think he were Dick Grayson. He stood, his back cracking as he rose to his feet (which, since when did back cracking start at 25? He’d need to have a word with whoever designed the human spine. Ha.) and gently lifted Lian with him.

“You should get to bed, kid, it’s late,” Roy whispered so as to not disturb the sleeping toddler, offering a small smile to Grant. Grant just shrugged in response as Roy carried Lian to her room, resting the girl on his hip while he moved the full wardrobe of costume choices she’d gone through before finally settling on a very tiny Agent Smith from the bed onto the floor.

“Night, Etai Yazi,” He smiled, gently settling her in bed and tucking her blankets around her. He positioned her raccoon plush between her arms, and the small girl instinctively squished her cheek against it. With one last check to ensure her comfort, and that she was far enough from the edge to prevent her falling out, Roy switched on the nightlight and closed the door to Lian’s room.

Grant was still sitting on the couch, staring at the black television screen with that face that meant he was getting in his own head about something, just barely visible from the jack o’lantern light. Roy crossed the room at an easy pace so as to not disturb the teenager, sitting down on the other side of the vampire-dressed boy.

“Kid, it’s midnight. You wanna head to bed?”

Grant shook his head. “It’s not midnight yet, there’s still a minute left.”

Roy stared in mild confusion, but didn’t comment. He’d been looking forward to Halloween for weeks, even going so far as to hand-make little pumpkin chains to hang around the walls and some spooky paper arrows (a compromise for bats; Roy’s not decorating his house in Bruce Wayne propaganda) which he’d blu-tacked to the walls. Maybe he wanted to celebrate every second of the holiday. So Roy just leaned back, his hands crossed over his stomach, and watched with Grant as the seconds ticked by.

As the second, minute, and hour hands finally connected at the XII, Grant leaned over the side of the couch, fumbling underneath it for a moment, before pulling out a small box wrapped in red and yellow paper.

“What’s this?” Roy raised an eyebrow, turning the gift over in his hand. It was light, but not weightless- maybe something metal? Or perhaps a hard piece of plastic.

“It’s a birthday present.”

“Since when do you know my birthday?”

“Tempest told Jesse, and she told me.”

“Since when does Garth know my birthday?”

“Roy!” Grant sighed in exasperation, slapping his guardian on the arm.

“Alright, alright,” Roy smiled, carefully unwrapping the paper. The gift was wrapped with precision, so he took his time unwrapping it so he didn’t rip it.

“A box! Just what I always wanted,” He grinned, earning a groan in response.

“Open the box!” Grant whined, and Roy laughed at his impatience.

“Y’know, technically I’m not twenty-six until eleven-”

“Roy!” Grant smacked him again, making Roy laugh harder. Nevertheless, he decided to stop teasing for now, just because the anticipation was so thick it was practically cologne. With only the slightest pause for dramatic effect, Roy lifted the lid of the white cardboard box.

Inside lay a small plastic figure of a bow. No, not just any bow, Roy’s bow, without even the slightest doubt. The red compound was the spitting image of his own, even down to the small white blue stains from forgetting to put it away when he painted the kitchen and the leftover paper from one of Lian’s stickers he’d never managed to entirely remove. Roy stared at the figure in awe, turning it over in his hand and inspecting the details.

“D’you like it?” Grant asked tentatively, and Roy’s heart ached at the look on his face, the hesitation as he waited for the ball to drop, waited for Roy to reprimand him or tell him to put more effort into it.

“Kid- I love it. You made this?” Roy kept his voice soft, glancing between the bow and the boy. Grant’s eyes widened ever so slightly at the unexpected praise, and he nodded slightly.

“Yeah, uh, I mean, I used Nightwing’s 3D printer for, um, actually making it, but- but I made the 3D model and painted it.”

“It’s perfect,” Roy smiled, pulling Grant into a hug. Grant stiffened slightly at first, but relaxed into the embrace after a moment’s pause, resting his chin on Roy’s shoulder.

Maybe the sense’s not so strange. Maybe every other emotion he’d felt the rest of his life was unnatural. Because in that moment, Roy felt a sense of familiarity, like he’d never had a life without Grant in it. Maybe the wordless boy didn’t need to be so wordless after all.

Damn it all to hell. That’s my son.

[pics-and-fanfics]

Looking back at all the “every version of me” posts I’ve made since I started talking about it on here, and I think it’s kinda funny but also sad that the blogs I followed when I first got into this hellsite are blogs I don’t interact with anymore because I’ve drifted away from Marvel

I mean, I still love the Marvel fandom, but it’s just not my thing anymore, you know? And I’m getting so into DC, and I’m really hoping I don’t have that happen again

But that’s not why I wanted to make this post, I wanted to look back at the original idea of Every Version of Me, back when I was just seeing a bit of batfam stuff in my feed and I was just curious (help I’ve been yanked down the rabbit hole)

The original document, which is what I use, but I basically erased it and rewrote it, bc at the time I really started getting into this fic was like early/mid last year, and I wanted to just have a fresh slate

The original idea/doc was put into words in October of 2022 (wow over a year ago) (no, that’s not my real name, deal with it)

And the first picrew I ever made of Skyler (which I still have) was made on May 11, 2023

The original idea of Skyler was an AFAB transmasc with anxiety, depression, ADHD, possible PTSD, asexual, bi-romantic, and a lot of trust issues

His biggest fear was never being good enough, and that Bruce would realize that Skye wasn’t “perfect” aka good enough, and would toss him aside, like everyone else had done

He had trauma from being raped as a kid multiple times and nobody believing him

I think he had an eating disorder? I’m not sure anymore, it’s been practically forever

He had tried to kill himself before, he’d been shoved into hundreds of foster homes between the ages of 7 and 13, bc almost none of the foster homes lasted more than a week. He still has the pocket knife he stole.

He idolized Red Hood, bc that’s who saved him one night when it was cold or he was getting beat up by bigger and stronger people. I don’t really know how or why, but I know that Red Hood saved Skyler, and now he idolizes him, he wants to be just like him. (Think the “big brother I wanna be just like you” edits)

Skyler never changed his name, because it’s something his parents gave him, and it’s one of the only things he had left of them, besides the languages they taught him when he was itty bitty.

Skyler was (and is) Italian and Russian, and knows how to flip you off in more than 3 languages.

Skyler is one of the blorbos that has lasted the longest, even if they did take a back burner a few times, but they never left.

I love Skyler, and I hope you do too.

❤️✍️

[hostilecandle]

Howdy! Welcome to my blog!

Y'all can call me Cain! I'm a happily married gay man who also happens to be fic writer and fanartist :) You can find my Masterlist below the cut! !!All Gifs Used Are My Own Unless Credited Otherwise!!

Currently vibing in the Call of Duty fandom, but this is not a singular fandom blog and I tend to just post whatever I feel like at the time. This includes NSFW content as well.

I do take ask requests for writing and art. Open to most things so don't be afraid to send an ask :)

☆I'm in my mid 20s and have dyslexia lol

☆I was in a car accident a few years ago that has left me an ambulatory wheelchair user. I talk openly about this and my experiences about that

☆I went to university for traditional theater and have been a state sanctioned judge for Forensic acting and Public Speaking (I often use these skills and experiences to discuss character analysis and have open conversations about acting)

☆(This one is mainly important because I'm currently in the CoD fandom) I am VERY anti-war but talk openly about my experiences growing up in a conservative and strict military house on a farm in the Midwest of the United States.

☆I'm a reader. I read all the time, can't get enough. I love curling up on the couch with something to read and a fresh cup of tea :)

-I DO NOT tolerate harassment or censorship of any kind. If you're one of those individuals who scream and cry about "propshippers" or "problematic content" my blog is not a safe place for you.

-I don't have a limit on ages (kinda). Look, I also remember being a horny teen on the internet. Hell I was in a conservative home with no other outlet so I get it. THAT BEING SAID: My rule is don't be stupid. If I know or find out you're a minor following me, I will block you. Have some basic internet safety and common sense. You know what is and is not a space for you. Don't be dumb about it. (SERIOUSLY STOP PUTTING YALLS REAL NAME AND AGES!! ARE SCHOOLS NOT TEACHING THIS ANYMORE?!)

-Don't be an asshole. Treat me with respect and I will offer the same. But I have no problem being an absolute cunt myself and I block liberally :)

Fic & Art Masterlists below the cut!

A03 Link [Here]

Twitter Link [Here]

NSFW CoD Twitter [Here]

All Dividers/Resources Blog Links I use can be found [Here] (All credits are also given on each individual post. This is just for people to find their blogs easily)

This Truth Is So Well Fixed - Price x M! Reader Regency Au

Got A Light? - Spicy Price x GN! Reader

My Price Headcannons - What it says on the tin lol

Sick - 141 members would taking care of sick GN! Reader

Swap - 09 and Reboot Soap swap places

Office hours - Spicy Price x M! Reader

Dark Waters Au- Mermay 141 concept

Poly!141 Pacific Rim Au

Ghoap character sheet-Pacific Rim Au

The General Zapped Soap

141 Debrief meme

Pin-up Price

Ghost Concept sketch

Dark Waters Au Price

Dark Waters Au Gaz

[Dividers by the-aesthetics-shop, cafekitsune, and drizztdohurtin]

[thedemigodoracle]

Please read:

Ok, so as I jokingly said before “I’m back.” - I’m not joking, I am back.

Not entirely yet but here are some things to wait for in the near future.

Before I list it I need to browse fast through the real life stuff first so bear with:

- one of the reasons I did go missing from art and fandoms in general wasn’t just the ammount of books but also family situations, depression, relationships and in the last few years I lost grandma, grandpa and even my mother to a disease they don’t have it diagnosed yet because it was so rare.

Obvsly took a major hit to my mental health and the ability to write and just have energy kinda left me. I’m handling it I’m in therapy. This is all we need to talk about it.

- it’s been over ten years since some of your fave fics have been updated and while both Clichesbullet on ff.net and thatu on DA will be there and won’t be deleted HERE are what’s to expect:

1. My endgame here is reading the books back and forth again, as well as other source

Material for other fandoms I will

Be publishing for.

-updating the old fan mixes and uploading it to Spotify so it’s more accessible and going back (when possible to art).

- I will use AO3 some new aesthetics and user name (though probably just thatu) and edit a lot more to fit what I believe is better not because the world changed in general but because so

Did I.

Some of the racism and homophobia will still be there are these are the characters having flaws whose arcs weren’t complete but lots of it will also be changed because I’m 34 now I also the world is changed and some stuff just wouldn’t fly and I kinda hate it (but the old material is still there available on the old

Accounts).

- I’m not sure technology will be adapted but some references will here and there and I can clearly deliver something better now that I’ve taught English for over half of my life and am taking a masters degree on translation studies.

- real life will get me too busy sometimes so please I hope you’re excited but I know lots

Of you also have jobs or even families. So leave reviews and keep

Me company but also understand I was bad at updating before even with better time

Management this is will be a ride.

- I’m doing this to prove myself I can do and make good things.

- This site as well as the thatu blog will be updated.

- if you were a follower and have deleted your tumblr or changed usernames please leave a reply with who we were because I’ve had an eventful few years. I remember most of you, but I may need a nudge.

- both my writing and art style have developed and so did my world views - stuff will look different but hopefully still bring you comfort. And laughter.

And tears…?

- there will be some one shots posted focusing on stuff like grown up characters and new knowledge

We now have though the characterization will still follow the book ones as that’s how I kinda got used to it.

- I’m back but I’ll be getting back slowly and posting updates here. Tell ur friends who haven’t been here in a while but used to be part of our group of

Weirdos.

- I missed being a fandom person and hopefully now I can find solace in you guys back again.

- some new fandoms will pop up, as will

Some

Ships (see what I did there? Find solace? Will some ships? Hehe).

-Some extra texts will be added to whatever adaptations I make especially regarding transphobia and HP though I do intend to finish my Hannah/Neville story.

- maybe I’ll write original

Stuff too who knows?

Also, I missed you, spread the word. There’s a brand new old me in town. New ships, new views, new one shots, edits, a very different music taste (actually no I just added more stuff) and a lot of improved knowledge of vocabs and world geography.

Please spread this to whoever you think might be interested. It’s not popularity or anything, I’m trying to get back some pieces of me I lost along the way and writing and drawing used to be FUN and help me make FRIENDS.

I’ll keep u posted once everything is at least remotely ready to go.

And omg you’ll finally know what Silena had on clarisse.

Oh and I’m still not for writing smut but there will be more Adult/Mature like material as some ships require it and I am older. No minors having descriptive s*x

Of course but u know it’d feel weird to talk about these huge ass long relationships and not bring it up naturally.

Anyway, reply to this with whatever. Leave a like or something too but mostly leave a reply so we can start this journey together -

New younger fans are also welcome I’ll make my best to keep this space as safe as possible!! I teach kids and teens and I’d kill for u to have a place to be you safely.

Also there will now be additions on author notes for whether a ship is canon or fanon what I adapted and new fandoms new ships and trigger warnings before sensitive chapters that deal with stuff that before I wouldn’t.

Love, I’ve missed this,

thatu.

[sunshineandalittleflour]

Writing Patterns

Rules: List the first line of your last 10 fics and see if there’s a pattern!

WHOOPS sorry @onetwistedmiracle this took me a billion years (9 days) to do, the passage of time is simply not real to me. See twisted's post here and read her stuff, it's good. I will follow her lead and also pic ten fics that I wrote by myself, just to try and keep things easier lol

I'm bad at tagging people because this account is a side blog and I really only talk to twisted on it (is this an invitation to talk to me? Maybe! But please don't be offended if it takes me 9 days to reply), but if you want to examine your own writing style, consider this a lazy tag.

The last ten fics I wrote were for Critical Role and Star Wars (I miss you Check! Please, eventually I work work more on mine and twisted's collab fic and see you again)

1: You could be the one that I love, And now I'm standin' here, hopin' it gets to you

Molly had the feeling that so long as Caleb Widogast’s hand was on the small of his back, he could do anything.

Part 9 in my Molly/Caleb/Essek threesome fic, spicy but they're IN LOVE. I do love to start with a character thought/name.

2: I'm in new territory, somehow, it kinda feels like home

“What?” Padme said, her voice feeling hollow in her own chest.

A rare gen fic for me, I usually write explicit, but this was a fun prequel AU because I love to turn tragedies into opportunities. I also love to start with dialogue, just get RIGHT into things. It's also a short sentence, idk why.

3: Oh, if it's real, if it's sweet

“I’ve made a mistake,” Anakin said, and Luke sighed.

Another teen rating, can you believe I built my AO3 page on writing porn? More dialogue, I just think it's funny. And a short sentence!

4: Wherever you are, we are seeing the same stars

The day after Anakin left, Shmi almost sold C-3PO.

Surprise, it's dialogue AND a short sentence. Am I a two-trick pony? Maybe! Check out this kick flip!

5: Feeling like a face in the crowd

What Molly liked most about Essek and Caleb’s house—besides the fact that they lived in it and he, like, loved them—was just how many nooks and crannies it had.

This is the longest starting sentence thus far, maybe the longest starting sentence ever for one of my fics LOL I usually leave the run-ons for a third of the way through. And it's not dialogue! Shocker! This is also part 8 of my threesome purple wizard series, so the foundation has been laid and I could get a little weird with it?

6: All we got is us now

Ahsoka hadn’t spent a lot of time with Leia Organa.

We're back on the short train with a character driven statement. This is also part 5 of my pretty places series, so, again, there could be something to the already established aspect of it, or nothing at all!

7: Look how you made me

“Jester has questions,” Fjord said with a sigh.

Dialogue, but this time it's not from the POV character. I'm not doing a very good job analyzing things, but I am having a good time.

8: A message in a bottle is all I can do, Standin' here, hopin' it gets to you

Caleb Widoghast and Essek Thelyss lived very different lives from Mollymauk Tealeaf.

Character driven thought! Writing is hard, okay, and you gotta start somewhere. Definitive statements and dialogue are nice jumping off points.

9: I'm reaching for you

The first time Molly had sex with Caleb and Essek, he called himself an Uber right after.

This one is earlier on in the threesome series; timeline-wise it's like...the second story? 1.5 technically, since it happens mid first story? But I wrote it fifth, so. Establishment theory does or doesn't gain traction here, I don't think I know what I'm saying anymore.

10: 'Cause you could be the one that I love, I could be the one that you dream of

“What’re you thinking about?” Caleb asked, drawing his thumb across Molly’s temple, winding a purple curl between his fingers.

And we're back on our dialogue train! Dialogue starters, my beloved.

I don't know that we (I) learned anything, but it was fun to wander back through my most recent fics. Hopefully this will inspire me to write more fanfiction, but right now I am DEEP in the trenches of my own dungeons and dragons character, so. It's gonna be a minute.

XOXO

[growling]

Not even at the Top Three reasons I've mainly left the wc fandom and instead just do my own thing on my own tag, but incredibly frustrating nonetheless. How wc tumblr just treats people making their own fix-it aus for fun.

I don't know how it is for other fandoms, but the amount of people making their own rewrites of the wc series is.... massive. Basically every single guy in here if free to have a go at it if they want, and nobody cares, it's basically everybody here that makes up their own version of canon because the actual books are widely agreed upon to, well... *gestures at the misogyny, ableism, racism ex. the tribe, casual fatphobia, iffy at best portrayal of abuse, terrible and lazy writing in general* kinda suck.

it is kinda considered Normal in here, since it's so common, and as result, people just got... Really entitled? dare i say downright unhinged about other people's silly AUs?

One aspect that I feel is the most prevalent in this, that literally nobody talks about because of course, is the absolute condemn of anything realistic or "uncool". I remember there was that one post floating around a few months (years?) back, that basically said "[quoting. im lazy] I think the main problem with warriors rewrites is they get so bogged down in ‘trying to make sense’ or ‘make them act like actual cats’ is they forget to make things COOL AS SHIT. Like yes your bloodclan has 200 pages of foreshadowing but is it still COOL AS SHIT? (...) If your warrior cats rewrite wouldn’t result in 200 scourge animations of him being cool as shit if it was the canon material you have failed." and just for clarification I do not have anything against the person that posted it, I do not think they were being intentionally rude in any way. But. Both before it there was a problem, and after it got passed around enough I think people got the Wrong Idea. Or maybe the Right One idk man, and just found a way to describe how they felt about some of the rewrite projects going on.

The fandom is largely ranging from dismissing to outright hostile towards people making aus/rewrites/other fics where the Clans are more realistic or have more rigid naming rules, for example, ones where the cats act more like cats, many events don't really get to happen or are changed due to just not working in a more realistic universe, traditional and similiar naming systems, accurate genetics, so on so on. And I do admit there was once a problem where those people who prefer more realistic styles, especially the traditional namers, were pushing it onto others and acting really mean towards people just looking to have fun and not really pay attention to any naming rules; however, it was a long time ago, and has mostly died down. Nowadays, all the trad namers I know of are actually pretty chill, and there's very few of them. (Like, we are dying over there lmao the numbers are going down every year)

However, the fandom just, really has not moved on from those times (and I'm asking, was that really that prevalent back then? or are these people just exaggerating as always?) and continues to be just.... really bitter of tradnamers. Constantly convinced that they are "ruining their fun" just by having their own spaces somewhere. One blog of the more traditional kind that I followed got sent an ask somewhere along the lines of "oh yeah sure your fanfic is 'realistic', but would it have people make sick amvs about it in the 2010s???" and I just. Knew where they got the idea. Not even exclusive to just in traditional system, but people tend to get very weird towards people that choose to change up parts of cats' names they don't like or find unsuited for their au? for example, changing Longtail's name to Lizardtail because it's odd for a queen to just name their son longkit, or Runningwind to something different all together because they find the prefix "Running-" really silly to name a baby or because the suffix "-wind" is already the name of another Clan in canon, or changing the names of some other cats just because they don't suit them or the circumstances behind them are iffy to them. (I personally find it pretty fun, and has renamed a considerable deal of cats in my own: ex. Jayfeather -> Jaywing, Longtail -> Lizardtail, Loudbelly -> Minkbelly, Clawface -> Clawedface, Hollyleaf -> Hollythorn)

Apparently, it's "boring", or ruining other people's fun somehow despite them not needing to read them? Lyrical namers (opposite of traditional, if anybody needs an explanation: tradnaming assigns hard defined rules to the names that clan cats can have, while lyrnaming does not have any rules and is about just naming them whatever you like if you think it is cool or sounds pretty) act like they're constantly being persecuted en masse by the Mean Traditionalists that brutally force them to conform, while.... the lyrnamers are actually the overall majority, while tradnamers are now pretty uncommon and usually literally just mind their own business. It's "let people have fun" but only for the things that you personally find fun, don't even dare to like to have rules or any of these things, it's not like any people in particular actually find creating their own suffix meaning systems personally fun or anything, they just want to name the cats ugly/boring shit because they're killjoys. Yeagh

Same with people changing cats' designs to be more realistic simply because they prefer it that way, who then get vagueposted about and called "uncreative". A very small percent of artists actually know real life cat genetics, and none of them, at this current time (people were very different say, like, 10+ years ago in the fandom. things tend to change) i have ever heard of apparently forcing anybody upon these things.

Not every silly warrior cats au of some random 16 year old with like 12 followers needs to be Cool to your near impossible standards. "Let people have fun" means also letting people have fun that you personally don't understand or don't find fun personally. I get so anxious whenever I force myself to word anything and then end up forgetting half of it in the middle of it so if I didn't include something or if a sentence looks weird then that may be why. But basically, what I'm saying is: can't we just hold paws and sing masterpiece theatre iii by marianas trench for fucks sakeee can we calm the fuck down