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theidiotwhowritesthings · 10 months

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The World Ended

Joel Miller x F!Reader

Warnings: Joel Miller is hella manipulative, power imbalance, non descriptive age gap, Dub Con, smut, oral fem receiving, fingering, rough sex, P in V, Dom!Joel Miller, breeding kink adjacent if you squint and read between the lines, mentions of death of child, mentions of suicidal ideation (no more so than the show discusses), mentions of trauma, inspired by '10 Cloverfield Lane'

Word Count: 5,852

Summary: You wake up in an entirely new world, but you find comfort and love in an ally. He saved your life after all. Why wouldn't you trust him? Haunted Hoedown prompt: Stranded AU/Cult AU + "every moment might be our last, let's make the most of it."

[a/n: my contribution for haunted hoedown b/c i was inspired and couldn't resist (def cheated and ignored the days tho i just picked my fav parts of different prompts lol). 10/10 would recommend surfing that tag b/c people are making WORKS OF ART. This is just my toss it together addition lol]

"manipulation and control can sometimes be disguised as love." -abegail turingan

It was odd to wake up with no memory of going to bed. Disorienting was probably the more accurate word. Enough so that for a brief moment all you could do was stare up at the concrete ceiling above you. There was a headache lingering behind your eyes that no amount of blinking would clear away. Where were the stars? The thought drifted through your foggy mind. Your bedroom had glow in the dark stars plastered to the ceiling. A design choice that a nine year old you chose at the store, and one that your parents were never able to peel away no matter how many years had passed⏤ they were nostalgic in that sense. You must have been just like them considering you admired those cheap, plastic stars while staying in your parents’ home during this visit.

But the stars were gone.

Everything was gone, and the sharp smell of antiseptic and bleach replaced the floral scent of your mother’s detergent. You turned your head into your pillow in hopes that the comfort of your bed would ease the headache that seemed to worsen the longer you were awake. You found no comfort though because the pillow you laid on was not your own.

Slowly, you began to sit up and you weren’t sure what was more distracting: the unexplained aching pain of all your muscles or the unfamiliar strange room you found yourself sitting in. The walls were like the ceiling, undecorated concrete, and the only bit of furniture was the metal framed cot you were now lying on. A hospital gown covered your otherwise bare body.

The clarity that settled in your mind was stark and startling. Any of the fog you initially woke with vanished in a snap, and your breaths came in quick, hyperventilated gasps. Oh, God. Oh, God. You threw your sore legs over the edge of the bed to rise. Your feet only brushed against the cold tile of the ground before you found yourself sprawled on the floor.

“Help…” The word left your lips in a breathless whisper as you tried to move your weak legs. You could only manage to sit up. “Help.” With every attempt, your voice grew stronger until you were screaming. “Help me! Help!”

A heavy, metal door, one across the room that you hadn’t even noticed in your panicked state, began to creak open. You sucked in a sharp breath, fear palpable, as an unfamiliar man stood in the doorway. He was older than you. Gray littered his brown, messy hair and facial hair, but it suited him. The man wore a dark green flannel that accented his broad shoulders. Everything about his figure exuded strength and intimidation from his build to the large hands that held a box of some kind. However, the moment his dark brown eyes landed on yours they softened. His shoulders hunched marginally, as if he were trying to look smaller than he actually was, and a line of worry formed between his furrowed brow.

“Hey! I need someone in ‘ere!” He barked over his shoulder, never breaking eye contact, in a deeply southern drawl. The man rushed into the room toward you, but when you flinched at his approach he slowed his pace. He took one hand off the box to hold in your direction, palm stretched outward, “It’s alright. You’re safe. Promise.” Coming from a stranger, and in this scenario, his words did nothing to calm your racing heart. You crawled backwards until your back hit the cot. Your name suddenly left his lips. “I’m⏤ My name is Joel.”

“How⏤ How do you know my name?” You gasped.

“Your license. It was in your bag. Didn’ mean to pry but…” Joel said slowly. “Are you⏤”

He didn’t get to finish his sentence as you blurted out, “Where the hell am I? Why am I here? What is going on? I⏤”

“Whoa, whoa.” Joel knelt down in front of you but kept his distance which you appreciated. “One thing at a time, darlin’.” He shook his head. “You were in a car accident… ‘bout two days ago now.”

“A car accident?” As the words left your own lips, there was a flicker of some forgotten memory playing in your head. The sound of a car horn, blinding headlights, the crunch of metal on metal, and the taste of blood. You flinched, “I… Oh, God.” You held your head with a trembling hand but winced as your hand brushed against a tender spot on the left side of your face. “Is this… Is this a hospital then?” The room resembled a prison more than it did a hospital room. Plus, it made no sense to you that your parents weren’t here. The man saw your license which meant they’d know who to contact. “Where is my family?”

Joel hesitated and you saw a look of what almost looked like regret in his eyes. You repeated your question more firmly this time. He sighed, “That’s… tougher to answer.”

“What the hell does that mean?”

A second later, a man and a woman dressed in bright orange HAZMAT suits came storming into the room. It was a blur of yelling and chaos and they descended upon you. Joel argued loudly with them and your head was spinning enough that it was difficult to follow what was happening. Gloved hands wrapped around your arm, ripping you up from the ground, but it was short lived. The man who had grabbed you was shoved away by Joel who gently sat you on the side of the cot before standing in front of you as a barrier.

“Don’ you fuckin’ grab her like that.” Joel snarled. The soft kindness that had been in his tone only moments ago was gone now. “You hear me??”

“Sir, you are not supposed to be in here.” The woman snapped. “Her wounds⏤”

“Her wounds are from the accident. I already told you.”

“We still need to test her⏤”

“Fine, but you don’ jus’ fuckin’ grab ‘er like that!”

There was nothing about this moment that could be called peaceful, but Joel’s defensive stance and his deep voice somehow managed to calm your racing heart. You didn’t know why the man was so protective over you, but you’d take any ally you could in this moment. The argument continued long enough for only a few more verbal jabs at one another. It settled on Joel sitting by your side glaring at the man in the HAZMAT suit as he used two separate swabs on you. One against the wound on your forehead and the other in your mouth.

“By entering without precautionary measures, you have bought yourself another 24 hours of quarantine, Mr. Miller.” The woman announced.

Joel didn’t respond but just glared at the woman instead. The second the two of them disappeared out of the room, Joel’s features softened again. You hugged yourself, trying to keep from shaking, and swallowed the lump that now sat in the middle of your throat. “Thank you. For that.”

“Least I can do.” Joel murmured as his eyes traced your face⏤ examining your wound, you assumed. You weren’t quite sure what he meant by that, but Joel didn’t elaborate. Sitting this close to him, there was something familiar about. You weren’t sure why because you were positive you had never spoken to him before. You’d remember a face this handsome. A voice that distinct and hypnotizing. “How do you feel?”

“Um. Sore. Confused.” You admitted. Recalling how the woman addressed him, you cleared your throat. “Mr. Miller⏤”

“Joel, darlin’. Jus’ Joel.”

“Joel…” You tested the name out. “Please⏤ Please tell me what’s going on. Where am I? Where is my family? Why⏤ Why were they in HAZMAT suits?”

The stranger you were finding comfort in let out a slow sigh. He rose from the bed to pick up the box he had brought with him. You had forgotten about that entirely. Joel sat back down after opening it and offered it to you. There was a simple set of men’s clothes in the box along with a water bottle and bag of chips. He shook his head.

“All I had were a few of my spare things.” Joel said. “Figured you might be thirsty or⏤ or hungry.”

You appreciated the gesture, but it wasn’t what you wanted right now, “Joel. What happened?”

He let out another long sigh before meeting your gaze with a look of mourning, “The world ended, darlin’.”

The bunker was large enough to fit thirty or so people. It was an underground, concrete community made by a survivalist who went by the name of Ezra. You had yet to meet this mysterious man which felt odd since the community wasn’t that large, but it wasn’t too shocking since you didn’t do much exploring since your arrival.

The world had ended. That’s what Joel told you. Hell, that’s what everyone kept telling you, but none of them could tell you concretely how. Every time the discussion came up, there was a new story involved. Aliens had invaded. Zombies had overtaken. A virus wiped out humanity. The theories were endless and since you couldn’t remember your last moments above ground you had no opinion on the matter. The last thing you could recall was leaving the house to meet some old friends who stayed local to your hometown for drinks. You got into the car, and the next thing you remembered was waking up in a concrete room.

You hoped your memory would come back gradually, but two weeks had passed and nothing was any more clear. You mourned a muddled memory. Families and friends ripped away from you in uncertain measures, and it left you reeling. The only pillar you had right now was Joel Miller. He had saved you in more ways than one. When the world went to shit, Joel was on his way to the bunker. All the people here were either friends or they knew this Ezra character in some way and that’s how they bought themselves a ticket into this sanctuary. Joel had been the survivalist’s contractor. Helped build this place and even mocked the man when first given the job.

But, when the world did end, Joel was offered safety and on his way there he came across your wreck on the side of the road. He scooped you up and fought for your place here with him.

You owed him your life.

The sound of a door opening snapped you out of the daze you had fallen into. Joel stepped into the shared bunk space looking worn out. While your simple duty in this community was currently food prep, Joel’s was more labored. He helped with any repairs and upkeep to ensure everything was working as it should. He dropped his tool belt by the door with a groan.

“Long day?” You asked with a small smile. Joel grunted an affirmative. He crossed the small room to drop down onto the couch. Since you were technically an add on rather than one of the invited, you were forced to share the room with Joel. Though ‘forced’ wasn’t quite the right word. You honestly didn’t mind it at all. Having a familiar face, even if it were one you only just met, brought you comfort. Though you kind of felt bad he was now stuck with you. There was no way he could’ve known saving your life off the side of the street was going to chain your existence to him.

The room was decent though. There was a simple bed in one corner, a couch pushed up against the wall, a table with two chairs, and a mostly empty drawer. Over the last two weeks, you and Joel had collected or traded objects to make the room your own. You traded a set of spare socks that had come with the room for a small, blue vase that you set in the middle of the table. Joel had even managed to find a few books and magazines that he gifted you.

You pushed up from the bed to sit on the couch beside him. You pulled your legs in to tuck under yourself. The shirt you wore was one of his flannels, you still had limited clothing options, but you had managed to scourge up a pair of yoga pants that fit you well enough.

“You?” Joel asked as he rested his head on the back of the couch.

“Food prep was exciting as always.” You joked. Joel breathed out a small, tired chuckle. You nodded toward the bed. “Lay down. Sleep.” Joel shot you a light glare. From the beginning, Joel was adamant about sleeping on the couch so you could have the bed. Even when you told him it made more sense for him to have the bed since you were smaller. Joel wouldn’t even listen to the suggestion of swapping turns. “Joel.”

“Couch is fine.” Joel replied gruffly and closed his eyes.

“If it’s fine then I should have no issues sleeping on it, right?”

“Ain’t gonna happen.”

You set your hand on his arm and felt him slightly stiffen at your touch. Joel cracked open his eyes to peek at you. “Please take the bed tonight. Please.” He furrowed his brow and you gave his arm a squeeze. “Nothing would make me happier right now. I’m serious.”

Joel didn’t say anything to begin with. He just held your gaze and under the weight of his stare you felt the back of your neck warm. The man was painfully attractive, it couldn’t be argued, but that wasn’t what made your heart skip a beat or your core secretly ache. It was the way Joel looked at you and spoke to you. The way he treated you. If his gaze were to be believed, you must have been a work of art. Joel stared at you like a dying man watching his last sunset. His voice was always deep and honeyed when he spoke to you. The words he chose put the respect and care he had for you on clear display.

The world ended and everything in your life felt cold, but not Joel. Joel was warmth.

Joel’s other hand settled on top of your smaller one. His thumb traced your knuckles and your throat felt tight at the contact. He gave your hand a quick squeeze and then stood up with a groan. You heard his knees crack, but he made no comment on it. Joel just leaned over and pressed a kiss to the top of your head, “Thank you, baby.”

You watched him kick off his boots and drop into bed. A soft groan left his lips and he fell asleep before the lights were even off.

The sky was blue. Your head rested on Joel’s shoulder as the two of you sat on the ground leaning back against the wall. A total of a month had passed now, and you confided in Joel that you missed the sky. In response, he brought you here. It was a restricted space that he only had access to because he would come up here to do repairs on the electrical system. In the entire bunker, it was the closest to above ground that you could be. Only one staircase and a thick, metal door separated you from the world outside. On the door was a small window and from where you sat you could see a patch of sky.

“Do you think the world really ended?” You asked softly.

Joel glanced at you without jostling your position too much, “What’dya mean?”

“The sky is too pretty for the world to have ended, don’t you think?” You mumbled. It wasn’t just the sky that created your doubt. There was a woman who worked with the mysterious Ezra. She said she would type out anything he dictated to her. She didn’t think the world had ended. She thought it was all some conspiracy or ploy. You weren’t sure how much weight you put into her words, but it left the question in your mind. “What if the world is completely normal up there and we’re just rotting away in a tomb?”

Joel shook his head. “You hear the sirens an’ gunfire. The SOS broadcasts on the radio.”

“Couldn’t that be faked?” You asked. Joel hummed in a noncommittal fashion. You shrugged, “You never told me how the world ended. Everyone else has given me their two cents, but you never talk about it.”

“Cause it doesn’ matter.”

“Why wouldn’t it matter?”

Joel was silent for a few moments, but you waited patiently for him to speak. He shifted and with your head still on his shoulder, his hand found yours. “It doesn’ matter ‘cause… my world ended two years ago.” You lifted your head so you could face him, but Joel kept his eyes on the patch of blue sky. “I… I lost my daughter. Sarah.” You squeezed his hand as your heart ached for him. “Wasn’t fair. Should’ve been me. But… But nothin’ has made much sense since.”

“Joel, I am… I am so sorry.” You whispered.

“I lied.” Joel said and your eyebrows furrowed. He swallowed nervously and finally turned to look at you. “When I found ya, I wasn’ headin’ to the bunker.”

“Where… Where were you going then?”

“Home.” Joel shrugged. “The sirens were goin’ off, people were in a frenzy, Ezra texted me some freakish invite, but… I planned on headin’ home to jus’ wait for the end.” It was devastating to hear someone you had come to care so much for admit that truth. Your heart broke for him. Not a single shred of you could ever imagine the pain or horror of losing a child. “On my way, I ran into you. Saw your car flipped on the side of the road. Once I got ya out, it’s not like I could take ya to the hospital with the way all of it was so…”

Joel motioned to the bunker around the both of you. The rest was history. In the silence, you could hear the whirring noise of the motors working the fans and the pounding of your heart in your ears. You let the hand not in his lift to rake your fingertips through the scruff on his jaw as your thumb rubbed back and forth over his cheek. Joel’s eyes fluttered closed at your touch and a soft breath left his lips. He leaned into your hand.

“I… Joel, I don’t know what to say…”

“This is ‘nough.” Joel murmured. There was a tension that had formed the second you caressed Joel’s face and it only built the longer you were in contact with him. It was a long time coming and was only coming to a head just now. You could control yourself, you were sure of it, but when Joel’s sad eyes opened once more the breath was knocked out of your lungs. His lips twitched into a small smile. “You’re the first thing I’ve cared ‘bout in a very long time, baby.”

The world had ended, supposedly. What was the use of wasted time?

You leaned in and pressed your lips against his. The kiss was soft and hesitant. A brush of you against him as Joel breathed in a strangled gasp. He pulled back and your heart dropped. Embarrassment filled your very soul as you let your hand fall away from him.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn't have. I just thought, every moment might be our last, we should make the most of it. Or⏤”

“It’s not that, baby girl.” Joel immediately cupped your face and you felt yourself melt between his warm, coarse hands. “You don’ owe me this. You know that, right? I don’ expect…”

You gave a small shake of your head, your eyes glued to his lips, “I know, Joel. I know. I… This is my choice. I want you.”

Joel took in a slow breath through his nose as his jaw locked. His hands tightened around your face, caressing the skin along your face and neck, and one hand slipped to cup the back of your head as his forehead leaned against yours. When he spoke, his voice was hoarse, “Say it again.”

“I want you, Joel.”

Joel initiated the kiss this time, and it was far from hesitant. At your consent, it was like he dropped all semblance of his self control. His lips were bruising against yours and Joel was desperate in getting you closer. He dragged you over so you were straddling his lap. His hands roamed down your body until they found your hips. Joel’s tongue slipped past your parted lips just as he dragged your aching core against his half hard cock⏤ thrusting up against you while swallowing the moan that left your throat.

He wrapped an arm around your middle and suddenly you found yourself on your back. The cool concrete floor was jarring to how hot you felt. Hands sunk into the waistband and with one firm pull both your tights and underwear were down to your ankles. You gasped in surprise, but Joel didn’t pause.

“Jesus Christ, what a pretty fuckin’ pussy, baby.” Joel groaned and tugged a foot out from your clothes so both articles wrapped around only one of your legs. He roughly grabbed your thighs and dragged you closer so when he dropped to the ground his mouth was immediately buried into your warmth. You yelped at the contact but it was followed by a wanton groan as his tongue ravished you. It was messy and rushed. Joel ate you out like you were his last meal, and the groans and slurping sounds he made were downright sinful.

“Joel! I⏤ Oh, God.” You gasped and your hands buried in his hair. Your hips lifted to chase after his mouth, but Joel dropped his arm across your waist and pinned you to the floor with a chuckle.

Joel lifted his face and turned to bite down on your thigh. You cried out at the sting of his teeth against your skin, but the drag of his hot tongue against the spot left you whimpering. “C’mon, baby.” You tugged on his hair to try and get his lips back where you wanted them, but he stayed firm. “Tell me you want this. Tell me you want me.”

“Want you, Joel. Need you.”

Thick fingers dragged up and down through the mess he’d already made and one began to prod at your entrance without actually sinking in. “Again.”

“Please. Please!” You tried to grind down against him, but his grip on your waist kept you in place. “I want you, Joel. Want you so badly. Please.” Joel had one fingertip circling your hole, but at your desperate pleas he sunk three of his large fingers right in. You screamed, both in alarm and at the sharp sting, “Shit! Joel, too much!”

“Shhh, baby girl. You’re okay.” His lips found your clit and the suction he applied there slowly took away the sting of his rapidly moving fingers. Just as he reassured you, you were okay. More than okay. Pleasure was clouding your mind and you were a squirming, sopping mess under him. Joel’s fingers curled up into you, dragging against your walls, and he made quick work in finding the spot that punched stars into your vision. “There we go, baby. Jus’ like that.” He kept his lips against your clit as he spoke and your wet flesh muffled his praise. “Lemme feel you squeeze ‘round my fingers so I can feel you squeeze ‘round my fat cock. C’mon.”

Teeth nipped at your clit, followed by the smoothing of his tongue, and combined with the pounding of his fingers you came with a shuddering cry. Joel didn’t stop his onslaught and he lowered his lips from your clit so he could drink up every bit of the soaking wet mess he made.

“Joel. Fuck.” You gasped for the air he had somehow managed to punch out of your lungs with his hand alone. “That was…”

“Not done, baby girl.” Joel sat up on his knees but kept his place between your legs. You weakly pushed yourself up onto your elbows and it only dawned on you then that this entire time he had been fully clothed. It was an almost uncomfortable balance between the two of you. “Get up ‘ere.” You began to push up from your elbows and the moment you were close enough his hand wrapped around the back of your neck so he could help you up the rest of the way into the seated position you now sat in. He gazed down at you, pupils blown in lust, and his dark stare soaked in the sight of you. “Say it.”

Knowing exactly what he wanted, you mumbled, “I want you, Joel.”

“Good girl. Open.” Joel grunted. The hand at the back of your neck grabbed you by the hair and he tugged down so your chin was tilted up. Joel shoved the three fingers he had deep in your cunt into your mouth. You closed your lips around him and moaned at the taste of yourself. “Belt, baby. Get my belt.”

You tried to glance down, but Joel kept his grip on you tight so you could only stare up at him as he pushed his fingers deeper into your mouth. Blindly, your hands groped for his belt and you struggled to get it undone as you gagged around his fingers.

“Shh. You can multitask, baby, I believe in ya.” Joel cooed and didn’t relent. “Work at it. Be good.” You traced his thick fingers with your tongue and your hands finally managed to get his belt undone. You got your hands into his pants, tugging down his boxers, and Joel groaned loudly as your hands wrapped around his hard, girthy cock. The size of him alone had you tense in surprise. “Hey, it’s alright, baby girl.” Joel’s fingers slipped out of your mouth and you couldn’t help but cough to try and clear the tickle at the back of your throat. He carefully pushed you down, onto your back again, but he followed with you so he was hovering over your body. One hand at the back of your neck, cupping it softly, while his other rested by your head to hold himself up. “You can handle this. I swear, this perfect pussy is made for me, baby.”

Joel lowered himself to capture your lips with his. The kiss was soft and tender. It was a sweet moment as his cock dragged slowly against you. His tongue licked against the curve of your lower lip just as the tip of him notched at your hole. You opened your mouth to ask him to start slow, but Joel shoved his tongue into your mouth, deepening the kiss, as his painfully large cock shoved into you. You screamed, muffled by his own mouth, as he bottomed out in one single thrust. Tears involuntarily sprung to your eyes at the intrusion and you pulled your lips away from Joel by turned you head. Your fingernails dug into his back.

“Joel, that⏤ that kind of hurt.”

“I know, I’m sorry, baby girl.” Joel buried his face into the crook of your neck. He left open mouth kisses there between reassurances. “Jus’ give it a minute. You’re doin’ so good. So good.” Joel was thankfully staying still inside of you and with the work he put in along the length of your neck you began to feel the sting start to fade. Joel shifted, just a bit, and you shuddered at the slight drag of him. His cock twitched and he moaned against your skin. “Fuck, you feel so good. So perfect. Knew you would.” Joel gave a short, experimental thrust and you gasped at the wave of pleasure you were pulled under. “Gotta move, baby girl.”

Joel pulled back until just the tip remained then rocked his hips forward hard enough to push you across the concrete floor. He roughly grabbed you by the thigh and pulled your leg up. You followed his lead and hooked your ankles around his back as Joel’s grip on the back of your neck tightened and he quickly fell into an unrelenting pace.

“Told you, baby girl.” Joel grunted, the only other sound being your breathless moans and the wet sounds of your pussy sucking his cock in with every powerful thrust. “Made for me.” Joel sung praises as that band of want and desire tightened in your core by the second. His hand slipped between your bodies to find your clit once more and your eyes squeezed shut with a gasp. As soon as they shut though, his touch was gone and with that hand he grabbed you by the face. Your eyes snapped back open in surprise. “Nuh uh. Eyes on me. You hear me?” You nodded and he tightened his grip⏤ his fingers digging almost painfully into your cheeks. “Words, baby. Lemme hear you say it.”

“Keep⏤” You gasped. “Keep my eyes on you.”

“Good girl.” Joel’s hand slipped back down and when his fingers reached their goal it took every bit of strength to keep your eyes open. Your orgasm slammed into you like a freight train and a cry of pleasure slipped past your lips. Joel groaned loudly. “Fuck, fuck, fuck. Takin’ me so well, baby girl, just like I knew you would.”

His pace ramped up but he lost his rhythm and in a brief moment of clarity you gasped, “Joel! Joel, you gotta⏤ fuck! Oh God. You gotta pull out, Joel.” He didn’t slow and for a brief moment sharp fear mingled with the overwhelming pleasure. “Joel!”

At last second, Joel ripped himself off you with a guttural groan and you felt the warmth of his release spurt on your hips. Your entire body went lax as he continued to milk the last bit of him onto your body and you felt the warm, sticky cum drip down the sides of your hip and down into your pussy as well.

Joel tucked himself back into his pants, without clasping his jeans, and he rubbed a hand up and down your thigh soothingly. You were trying to catch your breath as Joel separated your underwear from where it was tangled with your yoga pants around your ankle. You lifted your head and watched as he used your underwear to wipe away the cum now drying on your skin.

“C’mon, baby girl.” He tucked your panties, now a damp mess of your spend and his, into his flannel pocket and helped you slide your legs back into the yoga pants. When they were back in place, he pulled you to stand and grinned when your knees nearly buckled. “You okay?”

“Yeah.” You chuckled and clung to his shoulders. “That was… a lot.”

That had felt incredible, and the fact that it was Joel made it even better. But, it had been rougher than you thought it’d be. Not that you really minded. It just… caught you off guard. Your mind was still too drunk on pleasure to fully understand your feelings on it.

Joel leaned in to settle his lips against your temple. He hummed, “From the second I saw you, baby girl, I just knew you’d be my world.”

“The first second?” You teased. “Me bleeding in an upside down car?”

His lips were curled up into a smile you could only describe as boyish. Joel leaned in again to lock his lips with yours and you wrapped your arms around his neck to help hold yourself up.

The world had ended, but you had a new world now and everything would be just fine.

Right?

BEFORE

Joel stood at the gas pump staring at his phone as his truck was filled. His strange client, the survivalist who asked him to help build a bunker, had shot him a message that made little to no sense. He rambled about the “end of the world”, and invited Joel to join him in the bunker for the “start of something new”. Joel tossed his phone back into his truck with full plans to ignore it. He’d drive to the bar and spend the night drinking. It’d be nothing new. He was a regular at this point.

As he climbed into the driver’s seat his gaze lifted and he spotted you exiting a store across the street.

You from three days ago. You who he met at his usual drinking hole. You who had left him breathless. Joel had been drinking alone, the usual, when you and your friends drifted into the bar as an already half drunk mob. One of your guy friends had gotten rowdy near him, joking with another, and he bumped into Joel and spilled his entire whiskey.

Before he could even begin to lose his temper, you had swept in to save the day. It was obvious you were drunk yourself, but you cleaned him up, apologized for your friends, bought him a new drink, and just sat there and talked. You rambled about being in town to visit your family and catching up with old friends, and Joel found he could listen to you all day.

There was something magnetic about you.

Enough so, that he found himself following you down the road. You were driving toward the edge of town. Maybe to meet with friends at that new bar and drink some more. The roads grew less crowded as you got further out, and Joel thought about following you into the bar. Just to talk. It had been so long since he craved conversation of any kind. He realized though that you probably wouldn’t want anything to do with him. You were young and beautiful and clever. A ray of sunshine. Your options for company were endless and Joel couldn’t imagine being anywhere but at the bottom of that list. Drunk you had put up with him, but sober you probably wouldn’t spare him a glance.

Joel’s eyes darted to the passenger seat where his phone sat. A second passed, and a decision was made. He flashed his lights and laid on his horn. Your car slowed cautiously and he began to speed past you. He looked out his passenger window and the last thing he saw was your wide, confused and fearful eyes before he swerved into you.

He slammed on the breaks and watched your car flip a few times before coming to a stop at the edge of a ditch. Smoke billowed from the broken remains of your vehicle and Joel stared wide eyed at what he had just done. Guilt gnawed at him and he scrambled out of his truck to race to the driver’s side of the wreckage. You were hanging upside down from your seatbelt and blood dripped from a gash along your temple. A bruise was already forming at your hairline. But you were alive. Thank God. He hadn't even considered how wrong that could've gone. It seemed the universe was on his side for this.

Joel knew what he had done was wrong, but it was too late to go back.

He had made the decision⏤ your world ended and he’d be the one to build you something new.

[if you're curious the Ezra I mention is the Pedro Pascal character from Prospect (he just screams cult leader, doesn't he?) and i lowkey maybe have plans for a follow up on this but from the POV of a different reader and Ezra]

#the last of us fanfiction #tlou fanfiction #joel miller #joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #haunted hoedown #writing challenge #dark!joel miller #dark!joel miller x reader

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complete-clownery · 3 months

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my new OCs (both of them nameless)

This is actually how they look like

Hahaha yeah so now that I can finally talk about them (since they're still nameless I'm just going to call them Tarsier and Pygmy)

Here's little backstory for them and how they got to know eachother:

Both of them a street rats with no families,

Pygmy's been a wanderer since their childhood, they were found by a wanderer human woman who was traveling with her small troop, they took them in for a while but eventually left them in a random village the troop was passing trough, when Pygmy was around 10, they got fucked up over that obviously but adapted to the situation pretty easily. Now they're 26 and never really feeling the need to settle down anywhere, they just have to keep on moving for some reason. Oh yeah also Pygmy is born mute (maybe that's why they were left behind by their biological parents) they never learned sign language cuz there was no one to teach it to them, they got their own version of it tho,,, manedged to get them this faar, so that's good enough. They also like to keep a low profile

Tarsier is a bit different, he had a family. He lived together with his mother, but they were poor and after a particularly cold winter his mother died from an illness, he was around 6 years old at the time and now on the streets alone. He somehow survived living on scraps and learning the art of theft. Actually later on when he was 12 and a decent pickpocket some demon gang took him in, but due to complications (that he definitely did not brought up on himself) he had to leave the troop (more like flea). Now he's 24 and goes from village to village now being an excellent pickpocket and a snarky bitch gets in a lot of fucking trouble wherever he goes. he also doesn't know when to shut up, and has made a lot of enemies throughout his years (his extremely annoying too)

His first encounter with Pygmy was pretty funny too.

Tarsier took their wallet, tho not so long after Pygmy being just as streetsamrt as Tarsier is, noticed the missing purce and chased down Tarsier.

Tho Pygmy isn't really a fighter, they learned some tricks while constantly on the road, beat up Tarsier who is an even worse fighter (and massive coward), or more like was about to beat up Tarsier but he promised he would make up for Pygmys troubles by navigating them thought the particularly big village and getting them a place to sleep.

Pygmy was sceptical at first, but been dying for a real bed so they took the offer, tho they were rightfully sceptical cuz that night they got in trouble for breaking in an inn and stealing food, Tarsier obviously tried to put the blame on Pygmy, with no luck tho, cuz others have recognized him as a thief, so they had to run for their lifes

They ended up getting out alive of the village eventually. Pygmy was extremely fed up with Tarsiers shenanigans, but they ended up going in the same direction, also for some reason Tarsier decided that Pygmy is his new favorite person and stuck to them like a leech (much to Pygmys displeasure)

And I have no idea how did they manadge to warm up to eachother, but that happend and now they're sworn broths/siblings, partners in crime, trouble makers, fuck yeah

That's about all the info I can give to you about them

#clown does art #lmk #lego monkey kid oc #lmk oc art #lmk oc #jttw oc #monkey oc #monkey #original character #oc lore

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spotaus · 2 months

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Did some redesign mock-ups for Ec-4o.verse Cross, Fresh, and Error!

These guys didn't really *need* redesigns but I was having a ball with Trech (Ec-4o!Fresh) and gave him Arcade Carpet designs and decided I needed to redesign some others too! (Check below the cut for Old Designs, Lore, and a Stupid Screenshot from my pal @/Neonsix67)

So OLD DESIGNS:

(We're gonna act like I drew Trech more than twice-)

So, old art, yucky, whatever. We know the drill lmao- but because Ec-4o.verse is such an ongoing project these guys have been through a bunch of redesigns. Regrettably, me from 2 years ago was unaware of Layering and Shape Language, so they look kinda gross.

Cross' design has consistently been my favorite I think, just because he was a later addition and so had a bunch of my newer ideas integrated. They all have their flaws tho (Cross was too lean and got thrown between Baby and Grown Guy too often in my art. Error uhhh... yeesh. When I say I couldn't draw him, I meant it. I never knew what to do with his wires and I kept putting him in armor? Fresh just wasn't fleshed out enough. He was that SparkleDog of my verse.)

Also: I wanted Fresh to be top-heavy, like, big baggy round clothes on his upper half then lil guy legs. Cross I wanted to be more flat and strict, hense his clothes being all Tube-shaped. Then Error needed Triangle vibes. His old design was too Rectangle for me. The exposed limbs are mostly just for me because I love a-symmetry and also I don't keep a consistent clothing style, so I like to keep a visually interesting element (like a limb) exposed for clarity's sake when I draw them in new poses later.

LORE:

Cross: A robot (Ecto) who was initially a Guard-Model ecto. He was one of the last to be turned over when the government was rallying citizens to donate their bots to fight in the war. He was remodeled and supplied with a special task by his Programmer: Protect THE FILES at all costs. He's rather small for a guard-bot, but makes up for it with his agility and sheer stubbornness. Blue finds him heavily damaged and on low battery in an old lab, guarding a room that was sealed tight. His Old design utilized Shields (scarf detached to become them) but his new design is much more focused on quick bursts of offense. If he gets you first, then you're no longer a threat.

Error: an Ecto who was one of the first bots handed over. He was a former data storage bot that worked at a small library. As one of the first data-bots to come in, he was immediately modified and put to work alongside other Ectos to compile all of the nation's history into their data banks. Error was particularly receptive to overloads of data, so he continued to be modified and made into the prime data-bank. When the war started, he was eventually hidden away and sealed in an air-tight room. Eventually Cross was sent to guard the door. They were eachother's only company for... years? Error isn't fond of touch or tampering with hid systems, as everything he knows is barely abd haphazardly stored on unsafe files. Each Crash he endures takes more and more of his own personal data away, and he refuses to lose any more.

Fresh (Trech): A Parasite that was created by Sci to repair living beings in the same way that an Ecto can auto-repair itself. Fresh is actually a liquid that, when placed in contact with a wounded/dying person, it can invade their systems and stop all forms of bleeding/dusting. Fresh wasn't supposed to be sentient, and was meant to be scrapped, but he ended up being vital in stopping the war. In turn, Sci granted him freedom. Fresh can inhabit humans, monsters, and Ectos, but prefers skeleton monsters. He often defies the logic of his world, but what Fresh doesn't? Blue meets him far into the story after he's unraveled a lot of mysteries. Fresh just drops by after hearing rumors of Blue's repair work, and is met by less-than-warm reception from Error and Geno.

Other:

I was trying to save the image and my phone was bugging out, so I sent it to Neon. Safe to say she has peak comedic timing 😌💖 (For the record, we are both adults, and also my parents are aware I draw utmv stuff, so she had to make the threat actually a threat lmao---) I also love Chilchuck talking with the Operator. We are the dynamic duo frfr.

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writing-in-the-impala · 5 months

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Ridikkulis - (Remus Lupin x Reader) One Shot

Request: Hiii i Just read your Last Post for Secret smokes and Had an Idea. How about a oneshot of Professor Lupine x Student reader. Its time to learn the ridikkulus spell and its Readers Turn. When the boggart comes Out tho... Is a werewolf. Reader ist too scared to defend themselves and Lupine is too stunned to Help for a Moment. (Tw: blood Optional:) in that Split Second, the boggart werewolf attacks reader and it becomes a lil bloodY. Anything after that Scene IS Up to you <;3

TW: Blood, description of scars

Pairing: Professor! Remus Lupin x Student Reader

Word Count: 2458

A/N: Hello, I received this a while ago and finally got around to posting it, I’ve never written based on requests so I hope this is what you wanted. I’m sorry if I didn’t get it right. ❤️‍🔥 Also if you want to submit a request go ahead! It may take me while to get around to it but definitely it’s fun to do something based on other people’s ideas.

The thunder rumbled outside as you approached the defence against the dark arts classroom. The castle had a darker feeling to it this year with dementors circling the grounds but Professors Lupins lessons bought some positivity into your days. He was one of the few teachers at school that seemed to know what he was doing and his charisma made you feel warm and safe. Everyone loved his lessons. You didn't really know him well, but you wishes you did. You would often sit in class and think about what he must be really like outside of school, you imagined a friendly yet charismatic man with a hint of mischief.

As you entered his class the room looked almost dark from the clouds outside, Professor Lupin wasn't there when you arrived. Everyone sat down as usual, took out their books, quills and parchment, and were talking when he finally entered the room. Lupin smiled vaguely and placed his tatty old briefcase on the teacher's desk. He was as handsome as ever as he slowly took his jacket off and cleared his throat.

"Good afternoon," he said in a loud voice making the whole class go silent. "Would you please put all your books back in your bags. Today's will be a practical lesson. You will only need your wands."

Everyone smiled excitedly, Lupin was new but he already set a good impression as the teacher who let you use real magic. He made the lessons jump off the page. So everyone shut their books and stood right up as Lupin waved his hand causing all the tables and chairs to fly to the side of the room. "Now then, Oliver please will you give me a hand with that wardrobe over there." He gestured for Oliver Wood who nodded and helped Lupin push a large wooden wardrobe into the center of the room. As Professor Lupin went to stand next to it, the wardrobe gave a sudden wobble, banging off the wall."Nothing to worry about," said Professor Lupin calmly, as a few people jumped backwards in alarm. "There's a Boggart in there." Most people seemed to feel that this was something to worry about but everyone trusted Lupin to keep them safe. "Boggarts like dark, enclosed spaces," said Professor Lupin. "Wardrobes, the gap beneath beds, the cupboards under sinks - I once met one that had lodged itself in a grandfather clock. This one moved in yesterday afternoon, and I asked the Headmaster if the staff would leave it to give you some real practice. So, the first question we must ask ourselves is, what is a Boggart?" Lupin look around the room but no one put their hands up, you knew the answer but you didn't want to bring attention to yourself. Lupins eyes scanned the room and landed on you, he gave you a warm smile and you shook your head but his smile just grew larger as he said your name.

"It's a shape-shifter sir." You began with a quiet voice looming around the class as everyone turned to face you. "It can take the shape of whatever it thinks will frighten us most."

"Couldn't have put it better my-self," he said with a large smile on his face and a quick wink towards you. "So the Boggart sitting in the darkness within has not yet assumed a form. He does not yet know what will frighten the person on the other side of the door. Nobody knows what a Boggart looks like when he is alone, but when I let him out, he will immediately become whatever each of us most fears.This means, that we have a huge advantage over the Boggart before we begin. Have you spotted it, Miss L/N?"

Why did he have to pick on you every time. "Er - because there are so many of us, it won't know what shape it should be?" You guessed.

"Precisely, it's always best to have company when you're dealing with a Boggart. He becomes confused. Which should he become, a headless corpse or a flesh-eating slug? I once saw a Boggart make that very mistake - tried to frighten two people at once and turned himself into half a slug. Not remotely frightening." He got a few laughs from the class, loud ones from the group of girls who liked him most. "The charm that repels a Boggart is simple, yet it requires force of mind. You see, the thing that really finishes a Boggart is laughter. What you need to do is force it to assume a shape that you find amus-ing.

“We will practise the charm without wands first. After me, please ... riddikulus!”

'Riddikulus!' said the class together.

“Good,” said Professor Lupin. 'Very good. But that was the easy part, I'm afraid. You see, the word alone is not enough. And this is where you come in, Jack.' He said picking on the most shy and scared boy in the class.

“Right, Jack,” said Professor Lupin putting his hand on the boys shoulder as he bought him to the front of the class. “First things first: what would you say is the thing that frightens you most in the world”

Jack’s lips moved, but no noise came out. “Didn't catch that, Jack, sorry,” said Professor Lupin cheerfully and gently. Jack explained it would be a spider and Lupin told him how a boy in a different class who was scared of spiders put roller blades on the legs so it was sliding around.

“If Jack is successful, the Boggart is likely to turn his attention to each of us in turn,” said Professor Lupin. “I would like all of you to take a moment now to think of the thing that scares you most, and imagine how you might force it to look comical …’

The room went quiet. You thought … What scared you most in the world? You thought about many things but the thing that won was a Werewolf. But how do you make that funny? You thought about turning it into a puppy, a little dog, not a big one, a big one if it bites you can still hurt you so it had to be something like a chihuahua.

“Everyone ready?” said Professor Lupin enthusiastically as he hit play on the record player.

“Jack, we’re going to back away,’ said Professor Lupin. ‘Let you have a clear field, all right? I’ll call the next person forward … everyone back, now, so Jack can get a clear shot –“

Your whole class retreated, backing against the wall, leaving Jack alone beside the wardrobe. He looked pale and frightened, but he had pushed up the sleeves of his robes and was holding his wand ready.

“On the count of three, Jack,” said Professor Lupin, who was pointing his own wand at the handle of the wardrobe. ‘One – two – three – now!’

A jet of sparks shot from the end of Professor Lupin’s wand and hit the doorknob. The wardrobe burst open and a ton of spiders crawled out followed by a huge one, sending shivers even down your spine. Jack backed away, his wand up, mouthing wordlessly. “R-r-riddikulus!” squeaked Jack. There was a noise like a whip-crack. And the spiders were rolling around on roller blades.

There was a roar of laughter; the Boggart paused, confused, and Professor Lupin shouted. “James! Your turn!” James walked forwards as commanded and the boggart shifted again, he did the spell and everyone laughed again. You were finding it quite enjoyable everyone was laughing and having fun every person in the line looked worried but you all managed to laugh. You almost forgot that you’ll have to face your fear too. Before you knew it, it was your turn, you walked up after a girl named Jasmine Floyd and you shot Lupin a glance as you were filled with anxiety and dread. He smiled at you and shot you a wink before looking at the Boggart that was in the air transforming, the room was filled with a light mood but you felt nothing but fear. A giant furry werewolf with blood all over its fur and giant teeth towered over you, blocking out any light from above. You suddenly felt so small as fear filled you body, you repeated Lupins words in your head, you pictured it as a small barking chihuahua at your feet, you repeated the spell in your mind, then you looked at Lupin before raising your wand… his face was filled with fear, any sense of laughter was gone, he was frozen starring up at the wolf as you were. You realised that maybe you won’t be able to defeat it, that’s when you tried to say the spell but you felt yourself being pushed down to the floor. As you hit the floor a sharp pain shot through your arm, the wolf was above you, that’s when Lupin threw himself in front of you. “Riddikulus!” He shouted as a white orb appeared over you. “Everyone, class is over, please leave.” He shouted as he kneeled over you. You looked around at all the students who were looking at you, their faces not too unalike Lupins when he was looking at the wolf, Lupin was looking at you, saying words. His hands had blood all over them as he moved them wrapping his blazer around you. “I’m so sorry,” was the only thing you could make. He looked so nice above you, you thought and that’s when you felt yourself being lifted. “Stay with me.” You heard him repeat as you walked through the corridor. “In your room?” You asked, curious of if he’s flirting with you. He laughed but his face was filled with dread. “I’m glad you still have a sense of humour Miss L/N.” He said and after that you felt your head feel very light and fuzzy before everything went black.

You felt a bit woozy as you woke up, you were sweating, you opened your eyes and you realised you’re in the hospital wing, it was dark. Your eyes scanned the room as you slowly looked around to see Professor Lupin sleeping next to you on a chair with a book in his lap. You didn’t say anything as you moved around trying to understand what happened and that’s when he came to. “Y/N? Oh thank Merlin. Poppy! Poppy Y/N awake.” He said a bit too loudly for the middle of the night.

“I told you she’ll be fine, Remus, you never listen.” Madam Pomfrey said as she came over to your bed. “You’ve still got a fever darling, you’ll have to sleep here tonight, how are you feeling?”

“I have a sharp pain in my left side.” You said trying to sit up, Professor Lupin had almost puppy dog eyes as he looked down at you, he seemed worried you weren’t sure why. “What happened?” You asked as Madam Pomfrey walked away to get some pain relief potion.

“It’s my fault I’m awfully sorry, the Boggaart it got close enough to hurt you. It was a..it was a werewolf.” You never heard this tone of voice on Lupin he sounded hurt and defeated, almost like the life was drained out of him by a demantour. “Horrible creatures, it happened so quickly, it got to you before I managed to stop it, I’m so awfully sorry. Madam Pomfrey said the cut shouldn’t scar you’ll be okay. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault.”

“It is, I should’ve stopped it, horrible creatures. All they do is hurt people, I froze for a moment, I am your teacher I shouldn’t have allowed it.” He said angry at himself.

“You know they’re innocent people.” You said gently.

“Who?”

“The wolves, I don’t appreciate you calling them horrible creatures, they’re just sick, like I am right now.” You said and Lupins expression became hard to read.

“But it hurt you, and you fear it, how come you’re so forgiving.”

“Well a boggart hurt me not a real wolf. Besides I think you can be scared but understand it. You or I could be bit by one, and our lives would change forever that’s what I’m scared of, I’m scared of what would happen to me, unlike a dog attack a wolf attack makes people look down on you, call them stuff like a kind man like you even said. Don’t you find that terrifying professor?” You asked and he had a small warm smile.

“You’re very smart for your age. I found it terrifying to have a students blood on my hands first week on the job.” He said and you laughed but it hurt to laugh. He held your hand as you were hit by the pain. “I’m awfully sorry, that’s the last time I make the mistake of a practical lesson.”

“Professor as a student who bled all over your floor I beg you not to stop these lessons, it’s the only fun we have at Hogwarts. Maybe some safety shields would help.” You said and he squeezed your hand and have you a warm smile.

“Duly noted.” He said and shot you a wink as Madam Pomfrey came back with a potion.

“Please sit up for me love, this will help stop the pain and prevent any scars.” She said as you sat up slowly, Lupin helping adjust the pillow below you.

“Shame, I like the battle scar, I defeated a werewolf and lived to tell the story.” Lupin cleaned his throat. “I think I defeated it.” He said making you laugh.

“Yeah but I’m the one with the battle scar.” You winked at him and he laughed in truth this time, with one hand on your shoulder to comfort you as you drank the disgusting potion as if he knew exactly how bad it will taste.

“Professor, I believe this young girl will be okay now that she’s woken up you do not have to spend all night here.” Pomfrey said as she took the empty vial from you.

“Thank you Poppy, but I prefer to stay just in case, this is all my fault after all.” He said looking over you warmly, you appreciated his company. As Pomfrey walked away you turned to him and asked him what he was reading, he told you the name of the book and you asked if he could read it out loud. He agreed and just like that you drifted to sleep, Remus J Lupins voice washing you into sweet slumber as your head rested on his shoulder. Remus felt comfort being by your side, he was relived you were okay and truly amazed by the lack of hate you had for the creature that nearly killed you. The creature you were sleeping so peacefully on.

MASTER LIST | Remus Lupin x Reader series

Requests are open however they will be slow as I'm busy writing Secret Smokes!

#submission #remus lupin x reader #professor lupin x reader #teacher! remus lupin #remus lupin #one shot #request #remus lupin x y/n #remus lupin x you #remus lupin imagine

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scatterbrainedbot · 6 months

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Rat Sons AU: Character Introductions

Hamato Sho aka The Ancient One

more rambling & sketches:

(Had a bit of fun merging 03's Ancient One with bits of Rise's Splinter and Grandpa Sho, then started working on his origin story and was like fuck it! Guardians from 03! But for the Council of Heads from rise! but who are actually kinda more like the Ninja Tribunal from 03!! if they oversaw the world like the Guardians/Utroms! but were also kinda corrupt and uncaring of the lives of mortals and

the good news is now theres world building lore happening i guess, not just character lore??? is that good news??)

anywho, this is Grandpappy Sho!!

He's a little bit of a gremlin. Kinda rude, kinda sarcastic, kinda feral, and kinda very much had it with catering to the rules of 'polite society.' Basically, dudes survived some shit and has now decided that he will make that everyone elses problem too (/affectionate)

He lowkey resents his lineage and how he was raised, in the sense that he often wonders what life he could have lived if his youth was not fully devoted to "becoming someone worthy of the Hamato name." But he's actively trying to let go of all that and focus on being whoever he wishes in the present. Hence, gremlin.

A gremlin that is also, however, a freakin fantastic father figure (he swore to himself that his girl will literally never have to think about 'earning' any name, Hamato or otherwise; if she wants it, it is already hers, and wether she choses to keep it is entirely her own choice)

lol a lot of that was in present tense wasnt it? but yall know that aint quite true.....

tho, it might not quite be wrong exactly either...

[rat sons au masterpost]

(easier to read/separated contents below the cut! (super long))

—————————

HAMATO SHO aka THE ANCIENT ONE

Page 1:

Pronouns: He/Him

Age:???

Color Motif: ~desaturated sea foam green~

Last heir of the Hamato Clan lineage (by blood, at least)

As a young man, he spent decades training tirelessly to become a master of ninjutsu, molding himself into a perfect soldier, fully dedicated to maintaining his family's status as one of the most powerful names in Japan

Was selected to become a Guardian — an elite warrior chosen by the immortal Council of Heads to serve as an agent of their will. He served them for several years, increasingly resentful of their corruption and disregard for mortal lives

Abandoned his post after the death of a fellow Guardian (Tang Shen's biological father)

Disillusioned with both the Council of Heads and the world at large, Sho shifted his priorities from serving a 'Greater Good,' to serving his own needs and desires (and those of the people he cares about). He became very openly sarcastic, cynical and crass (he also found the way this horrified the neighbors to be freaking hilarious)

Did not think he would be well suited for caring for a child and really only expected to serve as a temporary shelter for Tang Shen until a proper family could be found for her, like maybe a few months or so at most?

Jokes on u, old man. Guiding a young Tang Shen through the routines of their daily life, watching her interact with the animals of the farm, teaching her how to do tasks so mundane he'd long since stopped thinking about them, Sho found he enjoyed the role of a parent more than anything else he'd ever done

Given his own experiences with abusive powers, Sho raised Tang Shen to be a very independent thinker, encouraging her to pursue her own sense of right and wrong, and to always be wary of those in power.

Though he trained her in both ninjutsu and the mystic arts (the good kind), Sho's greatest hope was to raise Tang Shen to make her own choices, and enjoy a life free of ancestral burdens or any ghosts from his past

Page 2:

As a Guardian, Sho underwent what he would later call an 'involuntary spiritual awakening.'

This granted Sho use of the Council’s powerful mystic techniques through the manipulation of his own spirit and will. These teachings were a highly coveted secret, granted only to those in the final stage of becoming a Guardian, and they were often deadly to learn

The Council taught that a human could only access the mystic arts if granted the ability through Their own will, that the technique was one of faith, a sort of forfeiting one's own spirit in exchange for power

Sho, along with Tang Shen's bio dad (oomph he needs a name), discovered a way to refine the techniques of the Council, to create their own source of mystic power without the Council’s influence, pulling from their own faith, emotions, and spiritual connections

Naively, the two told the Council of their findings. They believed that this new method of accessing the mystic arts would be a great benefit to both current and future Guardians, as it was far less damaging to the human body and mind

The Council disagreed.

Weapons that do not depend on you for ammunition are weapons that can turn against you, after all.

#my art #rat sons #rat sons lore #tmnt au #'oh ill queue up the first character sheet to post tomorrow morning!'#posts it immediately #look at this stinky old man #hes so fun #im really excited to share moments of him and lil tang shen via splinters flashbacks later #theyre so sweet #hes a really good papa <3 #ill queue up her info sheet to post either tomorrow or wednesday i think #probably round noon ish

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insertsomthinawesome · 4 months

Note

Sorry if this doesn’t make sense but how do you… art? Like from looking at your art, there’s just so many different fandoms and it’s all fantastic!! How do you not stick to one or feel like you *have* to stick to one? Sorry

Aw Friend! No need to apologize! :D You asked your question plenty politely! That's a really interesting question actually, and I'm fascinated to be asked it! Because I actually do know the kinda thing you're talking about! or at least I have experiences that feel like they line up with what you're asking. A lot of its... growing up? I guess? And not in the sense of like. becoming an adult. but the non-stop process of growing and learning more about life. When I was younger, an actual child, I just Did it. I drew whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. I didn't question hoping to a new interest or drawing different fandoms. I just did it. But the older you get the more complicated a lot of things get right? 😔 That was true for me.

I actually spent several years terrified, of moving on. Of leaving old fandoms behind. There was one fandom I actually forced myself not to leave for like... 2 years? Because I was afraid of all the projects I wouldn't complete, all the stories I wouldn't tell, all the art i wouldn't make. But honestly that was a horrible decision? It burnt me out of the specific fandom SO BADLY. Its only been around this last year that I've been able to enjoy things around it again without an overhanging shadow of stress.

I was still scared to fandom hop after that incident tho. Despite having gotten burned by caving to my own fears. It wasn't until I got into Trigun that I actually started to get less scared. A friend I met in that fandom, someone who was older than me, told me that... things have a way of coming back around. If you know the song "Everything Stays" From Adventure time? She said it was like that song. You will inevitably get older. But these things won't be gone. And you can always come back to them :) That clicked in my brain... and it took a bit longer, a bit more time of accepting that fact for me to find peace... but honestly? I kinda have now. At least for this moment in time. I wouldn't be surprised if the fear comes back around again, fear is funny and insidious like that. But I have the tools to beat it now :) The other two things I would mention are these: For starters: this might be obvious? But I'm a hobbyist artist. I don't make money off of my art, I don't sell it, I don't need numbers or clout in order to pay my bills. I'm completely free to do my own thing! Ain't nothing wrong with making a living off of your artwork and if that's the path that you want to walk GO FOR IT. But that path does have its own challenges. Because I don't walk that path, I am free to make whatever I want, without worrying about how it might reflect on my finances. The other thing is...

PERFECTIONISM...

THIS, NASTY LITTLE VILE COCKROACH, WILL RUIN YOUR ART LIFE SO BADLY ITS INSANE. It will ruin your NORMAL life super fast too 😔 it is an insidious little shoulder devil telling you, that you will be happier if you just do it the "perfect" way. IT IS SO SO SO SO SO SO WRONG. That is the key to the door of endless procrastination and broken dreams. SFLJSLF to get less metaphorical about it though: If you're always waiting for the perfect moment to make art for a fandom, to leave a fandom, to join a fandom (in this case i just mean "Get into the thing that interests you" when I say "Fandom") or create literally anything, you will be waiting forever. I know because i have been :') And its made it very hard to draw both in my past, and right now this very day.

Truthfully i'm still working on that one??? I've had some epiphanies recently that have helped a lot with my perfectionism... but I haven't tried drawing since having them? (drowning in the new Honkai Star Rail Patch WHEEZE) So uh. Not sure If I'm over that hill yet xD But yeah, if that's one piece of advice i could give you to take seriously, its don't chase perfection, in ANYTHING. Especially art. It will never be enough for you. And if you're doing it for other people, it will never be enough for them. Art is wonderful and messy, and human. And that is okay.

Its taken me a lot of soul diving and thinking and a lot of help from outside influence and kind people for me to figure this stuff out too. So don't feel bad to ask for help kay? We all need help. A lot xD I'm still not like, the king this stuff either. There are a lot of smaller, more niche, fandoms, I want to draw for, but still haven't, because of my own anxiety and embarrassment. There are fandoms I haven't drawn for because I don't feel like i have the adequate amount of information to be, ""allowed"" too (which is totally a fake standard btw, there is no barrier to entry for when you're "allowed" to draw something). I'm working on these problems every day.

Oh actually one last note: People can influence how hard it is for you to draw for a bunch of fandoms too. If you know you'll get made fun of for drawing something, its hard to draw. If you know you'll get praised for drawing something, sometimes that makes it easier to draw. Both of those things can mess you up BAD. Constantly drawing for other people (when its not a deliberate gift) can make you feel really upset and angry, and dissonant with your artwork.

But it can be equally as hard to realize nobody will share your enthusiasm if you don't draw what they like. That's not a judgement against anybody's friendships, we all got our own interests, and nobody can be 100% Invested in everything their friends enjoy. But It can make it a bit more emotionally challenging sometimes. And it can be hard to like?? Emotionally deal with that? in a way it makes art that you know will perform well, either with your friend group or online, like... "Candy". Its tastes good, but it doesn't give you long term energy (ie there's nothing wrong with it, but its not sustainable as your only form of sustenance) Meanwhile making art that is purely self indulgent is like eating a full and healthy meal. It gives you that long term energy of personal satisfaction, and your enjoyment and happiness also doesn't inherently hinge on whether or not other people appreciate it like you do. Obviously there's no issue if what you genuinely want to draw would also do well online/with your friends!

ANYWAYS, yeah, I'm still maturing and learning and growing with a lot of my opinions and perspectives and emotions on this stuff? Its definitely easier said than done, and while from the outside it looks effortless... I understand why you'd be struggling anon. I hope you can figure it out for yourself too! Best of luck :D also i could go on and on and on about this topic for years because alsjdfaksjdflJSDJGSD ooohhhhhhh boy I have learned and witnessed and thought many a thunk.

#isa screams #ask #anonymous #long post #I hope this helps you out anon? I'm not offended if it doesn't tho asldfjLKSJGSD #For all i know i completely misunderstood your question xD

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anawrites3 · 3 months

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A part of me hurts for Dick Grayson (and Jason too in some DC timelines) bc originally, he was eight when his parents died and Bruce took him in and he ultimately started his career in heroism.

Some authors age him up between eight and twelve. But originally he was eight.

Fucking eight.

I think in recent comics Dick is like 27-26, and I can’t stop thinking about how conceptually speaking, in some time lines, he’s been a hero/vigilante for nearly 20 years.

That’s longer than a majority of the justice league have been in the hero game (minus Wonder Woman but she’s literally immortal and a Demi-goddess so that really can’t even count) if we’re following the timeline/universe where the JL was formed well after Batman and Robin (aka Richard John Fucking Grayson, the middle-schooler) had made a reputation for themselves as Gotham’s vigilante duo.

Like it’s actually insane when you think about how this mid-20 yr old Circus kid has like 5 extra years of experience on someone like green arrow who’s well into his 40s.

And even tho I’m glad a lot of comics aged Dick to be like 12 when he started out as Robin, even that is crazy young.

They’re just kids.

It's honestly so terrifying if you think about it because when I was 8 I was playing with Barbie and the most important thing for me was to get my mom to buy me a new Polly Pocket doll while Dick Grayson was out there jumping buildings and punching bad guys, fighting for justice to make the world a better place for other people. He was 8 when he saw his parents die right in front of him and when he became Batman's partner and it's been so long and he's still out there, still fighting and still helping people.

When you don't think about it too hard it's a great thing for silly fics and arts and all the jokes - how Dick outranks most of Justice League members because he has more years of being a vigilante than them so technically he should be the one in charge when Batman isn't there. And I love those stories with my entire heart, saw a lot of arts and tiktoks about it and I think I have a few wips with this trope as well - and you need to admit that it is pretty funny. But it's also so insane. So scary and so terrifying.

But honestly that's one of the reasons I love Dick so much. Because after everything, despite all of that, he's still so cheerful, still so happy. Yes, he's angry a lot and he's definitely not the carefree guy media likes to show him as but I love how he still finds joy in life. How he's the light to Batman's darkness. He's so great.

#anon #my reply #comics talk #dick grayson

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parola-di-winx · 3 months

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Hi! Could you explain what Selina's deal is exactly? Doesn't she have the Legendarium in your rewrite? (Your askbox says art prompts, so if you don't mind doodle a little Selina to go with this ask too ^.^)

helloooo as usual sorry for taking a few days to answer i'm horrible. ok mmmm see i’m not great with writing and i don’t have all my thoughts perfectly sorted out but. in short.

she does have the legendarium sort of it’s just not like the show. it doesn’t summon fairytales creechers bc i find it silly it just holds any type of spell and magic and allows you to use it regardless of your level and skills if it makes sense

then the deal with selina in general is that she’s an earth fairy of snakes with one mom from earth and one mom from tír na nóg. specifically i made selina’s earth mom be from southern italy like meeeeee bc the old ladies in my town (my great grandma) do a weird pagan-christian type of Magic and selina gets to mess around with that too besides her fairy magic. she grows up to be a bit of a Hoarder of different magic types and techniques or whatever you'd wanna call it. whenever the wizards start hunting down the earth fairies for good selina is orphaned (haven't decided if earth mom dies too or not tbh we'll figure it out later) and gets stuck in tír na nóg w the other fairies. yea i stole icy’s s8 tragic backstory and gave one to selina instead bc she needs like Anything at all. eldora’s like a guardian fairy and her role sort of is to take care of the younglings so she takes selina under her wing especially bc selina gets like super super ambitious and is obsessed w learning more and getting stronger. that's how she ends up getting the legendarium from eldora and it fits perfectly w selina’s collectionist attitude abt magic if you will fjwifoafk. as she immerses herself in her studies she grows resentful and angry at her parents for letting themselves get killed which is really just being angry at herself for being a little kid who couldn't help. when the revenge fairies start arming up she joins them and it cracks eldora's heart a bit. they don't let her in any actual fight from s4 - she's still young and the earth fairies have already lost so many of their youngs - and it makes her bitter. even more so when they eventually repent. she's now convinced that fairies are weak and good for nothing - her mom died and her sisters in arms mellowed out - so when tír na nóg is finally freed and she can go study in magix she decides to hop ship and enroll in torrenuvola becoming a witch. the legendarium helps, it lets her use spells from magic types that aren't her own, of levels that she hasn't yet reached, so she does extremely well for herself as a brand new witch.

so the trix notice her, pick her up, bring her into fights w the winx & roxy in s5 blablabla but she Does get redeemed and she Does attempt to transition back to fairy and join alfea (make it a narrative abt Accepting Yourself For Who You Are <3 lmaonfjsidiw) but it doesn't really work out and she gets stuck as some type hybrid. she has to re-do her first year so even tho she's a year older than roxy they end up in the same class and in fact not only that but they also end up being roommates bc the winx don't fully trust her on her own so they pull some strings to get them stuck together which is ANNOYING bc they DON'T GET ALONG but they'll get better w it :^)

i'm riddled w exams so take this absolutely shitty horrid criminal fast as fucc boi doodle of selina & her noodle salem studying together and sharing snacks like that vine you guys remember vine

#winx #winx club #winx selina #mine #i hope no one sees this actually

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xaveria · 4 months

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should be finding out if i get short term disability pay in the next few days. doctor says i cant bend over or lift anything and ive got a ton of PT to do and i did a round of steroids which sucked, and yeah. the worst part of all of this is that my art has really atrophied because its painful to sit for too long. i have really annoying imposter syndrome about being disabled even tho ive been dealing with chronic issues my entire life (like i literally have a developmental disorder??? bitch what) because it could be so much worse, which is so unhelpful.

i still have outstanding commissions to do that i have been unable to touch for months because i dont have the physical ability to paint without hurting myself but we are so drained from all the health issues all 3 of us have had throughout the past year that have put us out of work that i cant refund anyone. just really hoping i can get better enough to finish them soon. i will be working on reopening our etsy this week as i still have the ability to pack orders and we really need the income lmao. its gonna be good! brian has been making some really cute new stuff. but yeah.

typing this all out longform is making me miss livejournal hahaa. shoutout to my fellow old people

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driedupeyeballs · 3 months

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OH MY GOD???? I already love them sm

I literally edited a new profile for them for this cuz the old one was outdated BUT YEAH IDK IF THIS WAS AN INVITE TO INFODUMP ABT MY JAMIAZU FANKID BUT IM USING IT AS ONE

Btw I can only wish to achieve your level of snake knowledge I thought my reptile hyperfixation went deep but yours is deeper I wanna know your ways

But that isn’t relavent YEAH HERES MY JAMIAZU FANKID HI TUMBLR *lets them out like you would a spider under a cup*

So I have a shit ton of Twst fankids btw! They kinda swim around in my brain but only a few ppl I know have gotten the info dumps lmao

Skye was the first one I made I think (actually it might’ve been Rico (florid) but eh oh well who’s counting)

But yes this is Skye Ashengrotto!

They’re my older Jamiazu kid, I do have two. The younger one is my octo boy Akram :) he’s funny I wanna pinch his cheeks but he’s not the point here

So Skye! It feels weird publically infodumping abt my OCs like wtf am I even supposed to put here

They’re a half mer, which do work a lil different than normal mers in my lore. Half mers can transform without a potion but it’s still a long and generally painful process, esp going from mer to human. I kind of switch between calling them a snake mer and a naga but there’s lore there- Nagas exist in my lore outside of sea snake mers, there are also fully terrestrial Nagas. So the terrestrial nagas wouldn’t be considered snake mers but the sea snake nagas would be a type of mer while also still being a naga ITS CONFUSING DONT ASK (actually do. Ask everything so I can roll more of my fankids out like marbles)

Skye was created by a spell, I haven’t quite worked the details out 😔 but Jamil is part gorgon in my lore which is why they have the hair snakes which isn’t a typical naga trait. And to elaborate on the hair snakes: they are alive, the one w the bigger stripes is Flora and the smaller stripes is Jett. Skye can communicate w them telepathically and their eyes glow which is kinda neat. They’re kind of Skye’s version of floatsam and jetsam (unless u count Rico (florid) and Lilac (treyjade) which is like their ver of the twins- IDK ITS COMPLICATED)

idk what else to put here so LETS THROW SOME FHARACTER DYNAMICS YEAH and also mentioning some of my other fankids! They all have profiles (except my Malleus kid I’m sorry Aihan I can’t think of a design for you) but I’m probably gonna save those for another post-

So jamiazu in my lore live in the Shaftlands in a beachfront place and also live pretty close to Treyjade, however Florid live in the Queendom. The octatrio and their spouses is a close group so they’re essentially a big family. My treyjade kids are Maren (older) and Lilac, then my Florid kids are Rico (older) and the twins Mary and Eliza.

Skye saw Lilac more as a kid cuz they lived so close together but also saw Rico a lot when flrd would visit or they’d go to visit them. Rico is an agent of chaos and Lilac is Skye’s 2nd in command so their dynamic on a surface level is pretty similar to the octatrio, but there’s still a lot of differences once u get into the meat of it. Tho Lilac and Rico are Skye’s best friends and basically like siblings to them.

Outside of jamiazu Skye is particularly close with Jade, they share a love of tea :) he’s their cool but also slightly unsettling uncle

THEN THERES SHENZI- Shenzi is my younger kaliruggie kid and I am not gonna get into her here bcuz she rlly needs her own post w all her trauma but good lord these two do not like each other. Shenzi’s really nice but she’s not quite as nice as Kalim so after about 5 months of trying and failing to befriend Skye in their freshman year she just gave up and now their relationship is nothing but hostile (which was not helped when Shenzi and lilac started dating)

Speaking of that tho- so my idikei kids :) Ember (named after the pokemon attack) is the older one and he’s basically that “Jock idia can’t hurt you he’s not real Jock idia:” thing as a person he has the Fire hair n shit but he plays basketball and is heavily extroverted but no one gives a shit abt Ember this is NOT ABT HIM this is abt his sister! Her name is Zelda because you know Idia would name his daughter Zelda- she got all of Idia’s social anxiety lmao. She’s extremely shy and there’s a total of like 4 people in the school she can actually talk to without melting into a small stain on the floor. She’s an Skye are both in board games club and sometime in early freshman year she falls on her ass and knocks over a bunch of stuff which Skye happens to witness and cue the most awkward interaction known to man bcuz Skye can’t talk to pretty girls and Zelda can’t talk to ANYONE but they end up walking to the mirror hall together afterwards which becomes a routine. Except they’re both awkward as fuck take like almost two fucking years to get together bcuz neither of them are gonna do anything abt it BUT THEYRE VERY CUTE!! I love them

Also my ashengrotto siblings are very wholesome I need to write some stuff w them- Akram is a little shit and he loves pissing Skye off but at the end of the day he admires them and Skye loves their brother a lot :)

Anyway good lord I’ve yapped too much okay OH YEAH Skye has a Russian blue cat named Mariana who they just fucking found on the side of the road and thought it was a mouse so for like 2 years Azul thought Skye was gonna eat the cat

OK HERES RHE ACTUAL PROFILE these aren’t as chaotic as the other ones all the other ones are more meme than profile ALSO RHEIR UNIQUE MAGIC DOESNR HAVE A NAME AT THE MOMENT IF ANHONE HAS AN IDEA FOR ONE PLS SHARE I HABE NO THOUGHTS

(If you recognize my art style from instagram no you don’t also THEY DO HABE EYES I JUST DONT DRAW THEM CUZ MY STYLES WEIRD)

But yeah I love them I hope they explode (affectionate)

#Skye ashengrotto #they have a tag now I guess #twst ocs #fankids #twisted wonderland #jamiazu #shaking as I post this #wHY IS SHARINF UR OCS SO NERVERACKING I WAS LIKE THIS WHEN I FIRST POSTED MY YUU OC TOO #maybe that’s just me #ash-OCs

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bosskie · 17 days

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3 Years of Molluck: Art 'n' the Journey

Man, it's time to 'celebrate' me drawing this Gluk for 3 years since I have barely drawn anything else than him since then... So, this is gonna be a huge post where I have bundled the most of my Molluck stuff (2021-2024) and tell ya about my Molluck (art) journey.

I started sharing my Molluck content first on Twitter but then, I moved to here since this was more fitting home for my 'Molluck love headquarters'. I have pretty much abandoned every social media but Tumblr. Right now, it just feels like I have found the right place to be but also myself. I mean, it feels like I have finally found out what actually interests me and what feels like me, so Oddworld made me find home.

I have known Oddworld for... Well, at least known about its existence for a decade or something, seen gameplay of AO and AE for multiple times, but I actually got into it only in Janurary (?) 2021 when, for some odd reason, I wanted to watch all those cutscenes from AO, AE and MO. Those cutscenes made me fall in love with Oddworld! Even I'm quite a new fan still, it's my favourite game series! It just hit me... I just love the dark humour, that darkness in general, the brutality but also that silly humour (yes, I laugh at farts)! I can understand why Lorne never really liked the fart tho' but man, I cannot let it be... I really need to draw my silly comic idea of Molluck farting... Got some proper comic paper for it; just perfect waste of paper! (Never used that paper, even it's like over a decade old pad...)

But yeah, for this reason, I got no nostalgia for the series but I got into it 'just in time', before the release of SoulStorm on the same year. So, I had time to play the previous games before playing SS, though I have never finished Stranger's Wrath... Must be the lack of Glukkons... But I'll try to continue it one day! So, from the ones I have finished, my top3 is: Abe's Exoddus, Abe's Oddysee, and SoulStorm. I have finished them all at least 3 times.

Since the beginning, Gluks and Sligs have been my favourite Oddworld species, but yes, Glukkons are my beloveds! First, I actually drew just my own Glukkons, probably because I didn't really have any favourite Gluk first, just loved them in general, but Molluck was the first 'official' Gluk I ever drew since I had started to love him. It happened after watching all those SoulStorm cutscenes; I started to see myself in him and only after that he got my attention, noticed his special appearance too. So, it wasn't love at the first sight but after I got into him, saw his personality; I just felt like he is me as a Glukkon. Man, he has felt like the love of my life and still does!

But my first ever Oddworld piece was this Abe:

Yeah, just some random Abe I felt like drawing since I got quite into Oddworld stuff! But yes, getting into Oddworld was also like starting from a new table for me since I wanted to abandon my old stuff for multiple reasons. I just wish to let that past be and focus on the present. Like I said, it just feels like I have finally found home, thanks to Oddworld! I have heard so often that I'm 'odd', so I indeed belong to there! Molluck has just made me finally comfortable with who I am and helped me to find myself. No one else has felt so right as him. Therefore I believe that I'll have lots of years with Molluck in the future!

But yes, it's time for Molluck art! I drew my first Molluck exactly 3 years ago:

I swear, I didn't draw this badly back then... You know when you just have some kind of 'skill drops' when your skills just get worse for some reason. I just had no idea how to draw him, so I ended up drawing quite horrible Molluck stuff first... But after a few months, I already started to get a lot better at drawing him. My way to draw Molluck was quite experiemental for a long time and kinda still is... I still have no idea what my style is but some randomly stylized realism... I have never even liked my own style to draw, no matter if the others liked it. Maybe it's just like food: it's better when someone else does it!

I didn't repost all my Molluck art here, just with some criteria since I have drawn Molluck so much... You can also already find on my blog almost every Molluck I have drawn, so nothing new here really but maybe two lil things. I bet that next time, when I do a post like this, I'll only post my top favourites since yeah, I do draw Molluck a lot... Cannot still draw him too much!

So yeah, welcome to my life Molluck art journey:

2021

2022

2023

[Less stuff due to worse mental health and exhaustion.]

2024

Yeah, this was like my Molluck art journey in a nutshell! I feel like redrawing some of these, at least as sketches, not really because the original looked bad but because I just love the idea I drew! There are also some WIPs I still wish to work on and finish... But maybe after I feel like doing digital paintings again. I'm just kinda tired of drawing with the mouse... Yes, all my digital stuff is done with a computer mouse; it's actually restricting me but don't feel like investing in digital art supplies, at least right now... I haven't even liked using a drawing tablet nor a touch screen, so it's what makes me hesitate... I also just enjoy doing traditional art stuff in general. The main reason why I did mainly digital stuff before was my self-hatred because I thought that I just draw some trash and therefore would waste the art supplies... Yeah, it wasn't about preference, just mental health issues... Though digital art has its advantages I miss while doing traditional stuff... So, I do still like doing digital stuff for those reasons.

Heck, what a difference:

Frankly, I feel like this year, I have finally managed to start drawing Molluck like I have wished to be able to or at least close to that since I still feel like I have a lot to learn... I more like feel like I have gotten my older skills back than actually gotten better... I mean, I haven't really improved that much. Even I have pretty much zero desire to post my old stuff, I wanna give you an example of what I mean:

This is actually a WIP still but I did it 6 years ago. Never really done any proper car drawing/painting before but I like old cars, so had to paint one! Yeah, I actually wish to draw more vehicles... I don't wonder why I actually enjoyed drawing Molluck's blimp. Gotta draw a proper 'GlukMobile' for Molluck, I guess!

I'm not here to boast, just sharing my journey, and that it can happen that one's skills kinda get worse for some reason but it doesn't mean that they are gone. I more like wish to inspire people! Like, frankly, there's one specific (SoulStorm) Molluck fan art I saw like 3 years ago, posted by OWI, that really made me wanna push harder to improve my Molluck art. I really wanted to draw Molluck like that person, it was so amazing, and still is! Just gotta give some credit to that piece, at last; it's been such a big inspiration for me! Though, I still cannot see Molluck's sinister spirit there, like OWI describes the piece... I must function somehow differently since I have never really found Molluck intimidating, no matter which Molluck it is... Oh, and I don't really wish OWI to share my Molluck stuff... I don't feel like it's good enough for such, yet... I don't really enjoy (too much) attention either. Those are also reasons why I didn't send anything to their fan art celebration thing they held recently. I'm still kinda curious to know what they would think about my doings... It was like a miracle I even felt like taking a part in that SoulStorm tattoo competition since I don't enjoy competitions, just wanna do my stuff in peace.

I still don't know how 'perfect' my way to draw Molluck is, but like I have said, I'm finally starting to feel like I draw him somewhat like I have wanted since I started drawing him. I just feel like I could still draw him better, and better... But thru telling you this, I only wish to encourage you! There has been people who have said that they wish to have my skills/talent and I have been in that same position with my Molluck stuff, wishing being able to draw like someone else. It only made me push harder, though yes, it has also made me feel like my stuff looks like crap, but I don't wish it to look like that, so gotta just keep drawing! Art is pain, got even a deep scar from making it, but I do still love creating stuff; enjoying my own results is a different story though... Like, I seriously thought that my entry to that SoulStorm tattoo competition (that realistic piece of Molluck and his Slig from 2022) looks bad and almost deleted it after submitting it, but I won... I still don't know how to really handle it...

But honestly, I never thought that someone would ever look at my stuff and think that they wish to have my talent... It's such a big compliment... I feel speechless when I think about it, especially when I'm a someone who has literally taken all his own stuff away multiple times because he has hated his own creations, saw them as mere trash... One side of me is still saying that 'What talent? Please, wish to have someone better's talent...' or 'Oh, you want it? I can give it since I'm only wasting it!' since I don't personally feel talented (and I suffer from self-hatred), even I have heard so long that I'm a multi-talent, been even called a genius... I don't know what's the reality with this... Welp, I just wanna focus on creating my Molluck crap stuff in the best way possible! I still got so much Molluck stuff to do... But I still hope that I could see the talent the others see me having... Maybe it's just too close to me, literally being me, so I just cannot see it... Or maybe I can see it but wanna deny it... I really don't know what to think of my stuff; sometimes I only see it as just some trash, feel throwing them away, and sometimes I'm even able to like my stuff but that I loved my art... Nope, just cannot say it, mostly because I don't love myself either, but I'm trying my best to learn it. I only love my subject, Molluck.

I'm sorry but I just can be honest about how I feel about my stuff... I do not wanna create any idealized picture. Also, I have suffered from self-hatred for over a decade, so I'm sick 'n' tired of it... It just makes we wanna be brutally honest. I know how it can affect people but I just cannot hide my actual feelings, I'm so exhausted... Molluck also just relates so much to my mental health, like he is keeping me together... Man, I don't know in what kind of dark 'n' deep pit I would be right now without him... That Gluk just means so much to me... I don't really wish to post my self-insert stuff because it's my personal stuff but here's one old WIP I could show, especially when I really wish I could hug Molluck right now...

Yes, there was a version of this without me earlier and it's not the only self-insert thing I posted without myself. Some of them are also cropped NSFW stuff... Sometimes, it kinda feels sad when I succeed to draw Molluck well but then, it's something I don't wish to show... Yeah, could have more stuff to show but eh, I keeping them to myself, at least for now. I already confessed that the only Molluck animations, in 2D 'n' in 3D, I have done are NSFW... I wish to do ones I can actually post...

But yes, I'm sorry but I'm not the one 'contribuiting' the rule 34, even I do create NSFW stuff about Molluck, like I have said... But I could make his 'OnlyChumps' account, like I have seen some people joking about, but it would cost an arm and leg; Molluck ain't cheap! Just joking but, yeah it's just my own self-insert stuff and it would be odd to let people kinda come to 'our bedroom'... Also yeah, I know that Molluck is asexual for a natural reason but maybe he could still enjoy it since for me, it is about sharing and giving love. I just wish to give love to his beautiful body! Frankly, I feel like I'm kinda in a minority when it comes to loving his body like it is... Like I have said earlier, haven't seen anyone like me with this, especially when it comes the way I 'want' him... I have just mainly seen people laughing at his body... Welp, maybe I just got odd taste but he is literally the most beautiful creature I know and drives me crazy... Just no one else has made me feel like this... There was always a feeling like something isn't right but not with Molluck. I only just feel so good with him! Oh, and I'm not talking about real living people here, never had such a relationship.

Oh, and yeah, I have forgotten to say that when I think about my self-insert relationship with Molluck, I feel equal with him, even though yes, he got the moolah, owns the stuff ect... But we could own the stuff together too. The thing is just that there is no boss in our relationship; there are compromises. I just feel true love toward him. I tend to think that he kinda loses his 'boss-self' with me, meaning that he can be vulnerable, show his soft side, and feel free with me. Though yes, he does still have his dominant side but at the same time, he can be submissive and vulnerable, so this is complicated to explain... But yeah, the thing is that we both prefer to be dominant, so it creates a certain dynamic to our relationship. I have also just read that some people who are in a dominant positition, like a leader, like to swap the role in private, so it has inspired me. There is still no need to really explain this stuff but just saying that I have built a complex and deep relationship with Molluck.

It took me some time to build this relationship with Molluck and figure out how I prefer/like him to be, in many ways. But I have always just seen that there's a sweet side of him, even it's barely visible, but he just feels friendly... I don't know if it's just me being like the opposite, again, but he just doesn't give me that 'sinister vibe' I often hear people saying... So yeah, my way to see him is kinda soft but just because he did make me have this image. I have tried to find all the information about Molluck but there ain't much still, so I have done my own part to fill the gaps and try to make this all make sense. I also do feel like he is actually softer now since he is different in New 'n' Tasty than he was in Abe's Oddysee; he doesn't even laugh with the other Gluks anymore when he revealed his Mudokon Pops plan! He just seemed to be happy about that the other Gluks liked his plan. I just bet that it was actually like his last hope to save his business since he did invent the other products first, like his own cigar brand and that Molluck's MouthLube... But I just bet that he did his best but his fate was unfortunate... His Mudokon Pops plan might have been like his last hope, him being desperate. I just love this Gluk so much that I feel genuinely sad for him... I don't wanna pity him and I bet that he doesn't want it either but he just has my sympathy and I don't wish him to get killed... I still laugh at that AO's good ending like every time I see it since I just love that Abe's disgust and shock when he sees naked Molluck! It's really the funniest Oddworld cutscene for me, even at the same time I feel bad for Molluck...

This cutscene is the best reason to play the good ending in AO. (Y) Man, we don't even see Molluck's suit burn in NnT! I mean, it's really a worse version of this, Abe doesn't even sound disgusted there... I have also said this earlier but in NnT, Molluck's voice is awful... Just way too much pitch shift... AO one had more personality there too, and SS Molluck feels more like that AO Molluck still. I love the both Mollucks! Oh, and I would also say that I'm glad that they added a bit pitch shift to SS Molluck's final voice... I heard the trailer one later on and man, it just made me laugh! Though, when he breathes, that pitch shift sounds too artificial... When I have done my Molluck dubs, I also add a bit pitch shift to make it sound more accurate since it's a part of his voice in SS. It's just funny to me that I can imitate him quite accurately... But it's useful too since I can 'make' him say whatever I want for whatever I wanna do! I can say that I use it like every day to entertain myself... Mostly just saying silly things or quoting him...

When I create my Molluck content, I do wish to respect him, handle him with care, even I can also kinda make fun of him... I see that his personality has different shades, like that he can be an angry, bossy jerk but also such a sweet Gluk. He still cannot do much with his body but he is able to give affection, love, and pleasure, even if in a limited way. Yeah, since I did say it out loud back then, him being 'the receiver' only makes sense to me too... I mean, his body ain't really meant for physical acts... But maybe it's just my own preference and the way I see him... I love his body like it is, even it kinda happens that I make him somehow a bit more muscular... It's not my intention but well, I bet that it's not a bad thing. He does still have his arms and... Well, his mouth... Just saying that he is able to do some physical stuff with them!

This already a long ass post but since I mentioned some stuff, I feel like saying that I know some fan stories about humans being in Oddworld and I know that some people don't like humans being therem, so it's a controversial topic. But my reason to imagine myself being in Oddworld is just that I wish to be with Molluck, looking like I do IRL. I have invented my own story like how we ended up together but it's kinda still in development, especially when I just cannot really think of a single reason why anyone would start to love me or get interested in me and so on... Like, I just recently started to feel alright with that if I was an artist in Oddworld and Molluck was one of my customers and something just 'clicked' between us, but he would have also really loved the way I drew/painted/sculpted him, wishing me to be his personal artist. I had another story earlier, mostly because I just couldn't imagine myself doing art in Oddworld due to my self-hatred... That ad I drew recently just inspired me to think about this new version of the story. This version would just make much more sense but I don't really care about thinking of how I ended up in Oddworld in the first place, it's not really important. I only care about my time with Molluck!

Oh, and yes, I don't mind being his 'partner in crime' either! Love is... well, blind since I just feel like I love this Gluk, no matter what he has done. It doesn't give me anything special 'kicks', more like just see that his personality has different sides, and he is a part of the Magog Cartel, so he kinda must act that way. He has grown in that environment, got the Gluk narrative of the things, thinks that he is doing the right things. I understand him and wish to be kind to him since I just feel like there somewhere he is actually a sweet Gluk. I don't know how alone I'm with this but SoulStorm Molluck just gives me 'friendly vibes'... I bet that the fact I see myself in him affects a lot the way I see him. It's just that I associate myself the most with the Gluks... I would be a Glukkon if I was an Oddworld character! (I should redesign my Gluk-sona...) Well, Lorne also associates himself with the Gluks the most, so, heh, I'm not alone with this. Dunno if it's a good thing but Gluks have just won my heart, despite of all the crap they do... Maybe they are just way too adorable to me... Glukkons literally made me be into octopuses too! Oh, and related to this I haven't actually ever really had Molluck as my wallpaper/background... Dunno if it's a surprise but just felt like using the default stuff or octopuses... Though, I found from the files of Steam version of Abe's Oddysee some desktop icons, like the best possible trash can icon, being RuptureFarms meat barrel! Just had to use it after I discovered it by accident. So, if you got that, check out the game files! There's quite interesting sound effects too... Yeah, good stuff! (Fun fact: I got 7 copies of AO... 4 physical and 3 digital. Maybe it's my fave after all, not sure honestly... Maybe it's just my love for Molluck...)

Man, it's time to end this post... I still feel like I have only gotten started with my Molluck stuff. There is still so much to create, so many styles to explore, just so much to do! I don't even really feel like I have a certain style... It feels like I always draw somehow differently... Like, just look how varied my Molluck stuff looks! Welp, life is too short to use only one style! Just joking, I just wish to see Molluck in different styles and put him in different situations! I'm actually quite used to draw with different styles... I personally feel like I got nothing that makes people think that 'Oh, it's drawn by Bosskie/Riki!' if there was no signature nor maybe even Molluck...

I have no idea what kind of style I wish to exactly have, I just draw something in a way I feel like drawing it. I mainly do realism because it's something 'easy'... Just draw what you see and that's it. Though, I do enjoy different drawing styles, like photorealism but also cartoony style, so why only choose one? But like I have said earlier, I have never liked my cartoony style, even the others have... Though, I also like to mix different styles together, so yeah, my way to do art is kinda a mess... Don't really know what I'm doing... But that I'm trying to picture Molluck! But one style I have wished to achieve for years is to draw in a photorealistic way but like it has a filter on it, so stylized realism or something. Can't help that the style I admire the most do is realism...

I cannot really say what I think of my own art but that I feel like I don't really draw well... Just have so much to improve here and there but at least now I do draw actively, after a long time! It's just that whenever I look at how the others draw, I tend to feel I draw worse stuff... But it only makes me push myself harder, maybe even too hard, to improve my stuff, though sometimes, I also feel like I should stop doing art since my stuff just sucks... Well, I only wish to create more Molluck content, no matter how crappy it was. It's just the truth that I tend to feel depressed when I look at my stuff... I often find it that bad... They are rare moments when I can actually say I liked something I drew. This is pretty muchly the reason why I'm also drawing Molluck so much: I'm not often pleased with the result but I just love drawing Molluck. I'm sorry but I could mop the floors with my self-esteem, it's just quite low... Still trying to build it and stay positive, even I can easily think quite harsh things about myself...

Whoa, if you made this far, I really wanna thank you for your time! I hope that my stuff is enjoyable, despite of my mental health issues!

~ Much love to ya! 💛

#molluck #oddworld molluck #molluck the glukkon #oddworld #art like a bosskie

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