#I think I've said that before on here but whatever

[squinch-depraved]

Thinking of Schlatt and mutual masturbation/phone sex. Thinking about him just moaning into your ear from the other side of receiver and talking you through it while also getting off 💕💕💕

i like this. short but sweet hopefully :3

"'s okay if you don't wanna doll," schlatt's voice rang through the speaker pressed to your ear. "i've got plenty of pictures of you i can use."

you shook your head, forgetting he couldn't see you, and jumped onto your bed. "nono, i wanna!" you assured him as you got comfy. "it's just new, that's all."

he didn't speak, leaving you to babble on. "i'm down for- for whatever you want, i promise. i just don't know what it is you want from me yet," you rambled.

"touch yourself, doll," he ordered you simply, voice gravelly. he waited for you to do so, listening carefully for the small whimper that left your lips before beginning to stroke his cock. his eyes and yours fluttered closed at the same time, thousands of miles apart, and he grunted when you mewled into your phone's mic. "you bein' a good girl for me?"

you moaned at his words, rubbing circles into your clit as you pictured how hot he must look at his desk right now. "i'm being so good for you, j, promise," you crooned. "just wish it was your fingers instead of mine."

he groaned desperately and you could just see him bucking his hips up into his hand. "need more noise from you, toots. 's all i got right now," he instructed. you obeyed, not holding anything back, and continued producing lewd wails, crying out his name as you wished more than anything he could be here with you.

the sounds he let out were surely ones that he wouldn't let anyone else alive hear him make; only you could draw these low, frenzied moans from him. you knew this and appreciated it for what it was: him being absolutely whipped for you.

"i-i'm getting close, j," you said airily.

"me too, doll, c'mon, keep goin'. finish with me," he whined, impatient from not having you on his cock like he wanted. the two of you continued, panting and writhing, craving only each other until you cried out and gasped, unable to catch your breath for a few moments as your orgasm crashed through you. "yeahhh, attagirl, toots!" he praised you before sighing an, "ahh, fuck," and spilling all over his stomach, staining his plain black shirt.

"we gotta do that more often," you murmured hazily.

"yeah, we do, doll. it was great. you should go to bed though, 'kay? i'll call you in the morning," he agreed lovingly. you protested for a moment before he convinced you and hung up. it wasn't long before he sent you a selfie of his thick, leaking, red cock, still standing at attention against his torso and cum-stained shirt. you groaned, insatiably horny for him, and threw your phone down. there was no way you could sleep now.

[reverse-runaways-au]

humbly requesting some Reverend and Will first meeting content 🪽🤞🏻

This was both fun and a challenge to write!! No warnings here, other than what you probably already know about the characters and the Reverse Falls au.

Standing alone in the room, staring at the candles on the wooden floor, he braced himself. Again, the warning rang in Stanford’s mind.

Do not summon at all costs.

It was not a phrase to be taken lightly. Not an action to take without long, careful thought. Long sleepless hours of research and study, restless nights alone, turning it over and over in his mind. Preparing himself for what he wanted to do. A reckless man would have summoned the strange spirit, this dream demon, as soon as he could. He didn't like to think of himself that way. He liked to consider himself better than that.

Nothing else he'd come across had a warning like this. Nothing else had the potential like this. Nothing else begged for his attention like this. Begged for his control like this.

Too good to resist. Too good to hold back.

Yes. Whatever this truly was, demon or lesser spirit, or something else unimaginable, he was ready for it.

The candles flickered. Stanford Gleeful held his breath. A wind wrapped around him, tossing his hair as the world distorted into grayscale. Behind his arms he watched with wide eyes as a hole ripped itself open in reality. A triangle through which he could see the whole cosmos watching back.

He blinked.

The eye within the hole blinked back.

Reality turned solid again. The triangle seemed to smile, looking around the room.

“I'm back,” he said.

Stanford lowered his arms, and stared. He was a strange thing, dark arms and legs with a top hat and tie. All blue, an almost photo negative shade, with a single eye that looked at him with cheerful curiosity. Intelligence burned within it. So did power.

He couldn't look away.

“So!” The little thing floated closer. “You're Stanford Gleeful!” He circled around, as if examining Stanford. “Yknow, I didn't think you'd actually do it. Summon me. I'm glad you did though! It's nice to talk to a human again.”

“How-” Stanford swallowed. “How do you know my name?”

The triangle laughed. “What don't I know!” He said. “I'm practically a god of knowledge!” He rubbed his face with his little hand. “But uh. I've actually been hoping someone would summon me for a long time. The last guys didn't like me. They thought I was annoying. I saw you find that old stuff-” He gestured to the desk across the room. “- and I thought, maybe this time it'll happen! And go better, too! I shouldn't hope, it's gotten me in trouble before. But for once, it worked out!”

He reached out and brushed a few strands of hair out of Stanford's face, before flicking him on the nose.

“Name's Will Cipher! Great to finally meet you. Hope I don't let you down!”

Stanford felt something odd wrapping around inside him. Like… intrigue. Interest. Attraction? He couldn't say. This whole situation caught him off guard. He'd expected a demon like his grandfather spoke of so often in his sermons, in personality, if nothing else.

But Will, he seemed… Nice. Innocent, even.

“So!” Will crossed his legs and looked at Stanford with clear eagerness. “What would you like to do first?”

Right. He'd wanted to test the demon with questions. See how powerful, how dangerous, he truly was. But he couldn't remember them anymore. Damn it.

“Hold on,” Stanford said, raising his hand. “What was it you just said about being a god?”

“Compared to humans, yeah!” Will said. “I'll show you! You want to see something fun?”

“... Yes?” Stanford said.

Will took off his hat and tossed it in the air. He spun around in a blur of blue and black, moving so quickly Stanford could not see him anymore. The hat shot up, almost hitting the ceiling, and drifted back down.

The hand that caught the hat was human, in black fingerless gloves. The head that the hand put the hat back onto, covered in blonde hair, was also human. Dark blue eyes winked at him, human eyes, a human face. A human body dressed in a blue vest over a black sleeveless turtleneck and dark pants, lean and youthful and grinning wide. Will adjusted his tie.

“What do you think?” Will said.

Something about Stanford's face must've caught Will’s attention. He wilted.

“... I didn't make you uncomfortable did I?” He said. “I can change back if you-”

“No!”

Stanford lowered his hand. He exhaled. Forced himself to smile through his disbelief.

“I… I like it.”

But Will must have known that. How, he would need to figure out. Stanford never told a soul about his true desire in a partner. He would never let anyone know he was gay. But this form that this bright-eyed demon took…

He must have known. How else could he have chosen a body that captured everything he'd ever fantasized about?

“Thanks!” Will said.

Or maybe he didn't. Maybe it was an accident. Maybe it was fate.

Maybe they were meant for each other.

Stanford grinned. This was the best decision he ever made in his life.

[spockandawe]

Oh, this is interesting. To me. I'm not sure it's interesting to anyone else! But I'm on my computer for once and FULL of words again, and I'm delighted to talk to myself given half an excuse.

So, I made a post about Long Live Evil! Because I cracked open the book and was absolutely taken aback by how transparently it seemed to be an SVSSS reskin. I wrote up a goodreads thing (it's whatever, I'm going to rehash the main points here too), because I was also full of words and beans after finishing the book yesterday, and after polling online friends, I was surprised to see that the comparison didn't seem to have organically occurred to anyone else, when it was so naked to me. I know there’s a TON of transmigration and isekai stories out in the universe, and pointing at one single book was a big claim, so I just had to assemble all my thoughts! I find this so interesting! And I reblogged my initial one-off post with a little more elaboration about some of the things that jumped out at me, then got on with live and went back to chipping at ORV and GHG, and shotgunned MADK this afternoon.

This is a subtle nod and a wink to my passionate love for these kind of... morally grey main characters! Calling them villains might be a bit much, I don't think there are many true villain protagonists out there (LLE included), and even Devil Venerable has a demonic cultivator who's doing demonic shit and killing loads of people... but with the ultimate balance of the heavens and earth as his priority. This kind of story is my jam. I was recced this book on the basis of transmigration and sketchy protagonists being my thing. I can't rightfully call SVSSS the best cnovel I've ever read, but it is my favorite. And I've probably reread it more times than any other cnovel.

So, that SRB post, huh? I put Long Live Evil behind me, and honestly even following up on the sequel is mmmmmdoubtful, but THIS snagged my attention again. First, the comparisons she's calling out as incorrect are wild to me. Draco and Harry? What? Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian?? (I had to ponder that one for a hot minute, but I bet you anything it's about 'the golden cobra' and 'the last hope' and that's just silly, they're not wangxian, they're MOSHANG)

I was recced LLE in one friend group, but I had an anti-rec from my book club friend group. My book club friend hadn't been at all impressed by it! And she's cool, and I talk up svsss and mxtx to that crowd every so often, without really expecting them to read it. I talk about transmigration as a plot device that I love, and the things that can be done with it! But with that connection in mind between the books, as I started LLE, I was jokingly defending the honor of SVSSS to this crowd, so I admit I was primed to recognize similarities.

I really truly did not make it far in the book before locking it down. I was getting vibes basically from the moment Rae started gushing about her problematic fictional fave, I referenced 95% certainty shortly after she makes the jump to the fictional universe, the golden cobra was 98%, Lia Mingyan's, I mean Liu Mingyan's lack of sex scenes was 99%, and the first pov section for Marius-jun was where I gave up and called it as a sure thing.

It'll be very funny if I'm wrong! I don't think I'm wrong.

Plenty of spoilers to follow, because I identified this inspiration early, I guessed basically every plot twist early, I don't have the patience to dance around spoilers while explaining how it all lines up.

Now, I said this elsewhere, but it bears repeating: I don't think this is plagiarism. I think it's tasteless to accuse an author of stealing and repurposing characters to her face. But I think it's also tasteless to repurpose characters as nakedly as happened here! Again? If I'm wrong? That's why I'm talking to myself on my blog and not messaging her directly (?????? who even does that). What are the stakes for me being wrong here? I look like a clown online? That would be terrible, I've never done that before! It's not a crime to write in ways I find distasteful. It's not a crime to write a book I think is not good, even apart from the use of fictional influences. But I like talking about my feelings online, and I can't be stopped!

But there's two aspects of this that make me somewhat uncomfortable in a less fun way. Both are contingent on the big IF. If this is inspired by svsss, I think it's not a classy move to take a Chinese story in a Chinese setting, inspired by the modern Chinese literary scene and classical Chinese fantasy, and just dump the characters into a generic western setting. Fanfic? Have fun and try to be respectful. Profic, making money off it? Ehhhhh. The question of how much change is necessary is a tricky one! It's not one I'm equipped to answer, this is not my wheelhouse or my place to speak. But it doesn't make me feel good!

However, here's where I have more personal stake:

Again, if this is inspired by svsss. It really doesn't feel great to see a queer story (a smash hit in more than one country!) stripped down for parts and made into a heterosexual story. It's not all heterosexual, we get side lesbians, we get men with homoerotic tension. But the central ship is now a guy and a girl. And it... stings a little extra, because in the story of svsss, the idea of assumptions about default (hetero)sexuality are such a central theme. A queer man has written a trashy, oversexed stallion novel where the hottest guy in the universe collects the hottest women like pokemon, and it sells so much better than the more personal stories he tried to write. He has to write this pandering trash to make money to live, he can't live on the more authentic stories he tried to tell before. The protagonist is the projection of his own insecurities and self-hate, and the protagonist's right hand man is his projection of his own ideal man. Another man transmigrates into the book, assuming that he himself is straight, assuming the protagonist is straight, and the force of their love changes the course of the entire narrative. In retrospect, it's upsetting to see those load-bearing themes casually carved out of the story and the hollowed-out remains used like this.

Anyways, in their place, now we've got running gags about how the heroine's tits are BIGHUGE now and she can't keep her balance because her GIANT HONKERS keep tipping her over.

I'm a little more bothered than I was yesterday! On the other hand, since I saw SRB's post, I've been chewing on that central ship. Full disclosure, it was one of my favorite aspects of the novel! My other favorite aspect is the dynamic between the golden cobra and the last hope (the moshang, which I think some people misdiagnosed as wangxian).

I know that the central ship here is the thing that's LEAST comparable to svsss, and the biggest roadblock in the way of my theory. On the other hand, I think it was the thing that HAD to change if this story was going to repurpose svsss without getting called out for being a classic 'bro can i copy your homework' adventure.

For this section, let's assume that I'm right and let's roleplay an author trying to figure out how to change Bingqiu into something not-obviously-Bingqiu. How do we need to differentiate Rae and Key from Shen Qingqiu and Luo Binghe.

First, we eliminate the martial sect thing. Easy peasy! That's a wuxia concept, and this book goes full nondescript western fantasy. She's not his teacher, he's not her student. And if she's not his teacher and he's not her student, why does this woman have power over this man, to build up the resentment that inspires him to turn the tables on her later? Well, in nondescript western fantasy, she's a noblewoman of some kind, and he's a servant of some kind. Noble lady treats servant like garbage, servant resents her. Doing great.

And to loop back around to the beginning of this a little, I think it really is key to this reskinning that Rae is a SHE. If the central ship remained queer, it would be so, so hard to pull away from the most identifiable thematic aspects of svsss. And pieces of what remain are... kind of bizarre for a normie heterosexual ship where our protagonist is aware that she's transmigrated into an impossibly desirable sexpot character!

Shen Qingqiu never considers that Luo Binghe might be interested in him because Luo Binghe is about to have a HAREM of beautiful women, he's the most heterosexual man of all time, and Shen Qingqiu is straight too! Besides, Shen Qingqiu is his teacher! He half-raised Luo Binghe! Even if Luo Binghe was bent, he wouldn't be interested in an old man like Shen Qingqiu!

Rae is 20, occupying a 24-year-old body. Her character's sexiness is relentlessly remarked upon from start to finish. Key is 18. Why is Rae so sure that he looks up to her as... a mentor, as an older woman? He almost goes down on her! He makes out with her! And she's like 'ah yes, it means nothing. lol. so funny how these things happen.' Bruh, at least after Luo Binghe kissed Shen Qingqiu, Shen Qingqiu finally got hit with the clue stick. Binghe didn't try to blow him only for Shen Qingqiu to keep noodling on about how Binghe definitely isn't into him in any sense, even the most oblivious man in the universe managed to catch on.

Why doesn’t Rae think there’s any chance of genuine attraction here? Yeah, I get that she's coming back from terminal cancer. She's doing great. She knows that the fictional character she occupies is one of the most desirable ladies in the land. He’s a teenager. He’s not expressing disinterest. A lack of horny for sexy lady ought to be more surprising for her. But I guess she’s slightly older than him and that small age gap has been magnified by the transmigration, so she conceptualizes herself only as his teacher, I mean mentor.

I’m not even mad at this dynamic. I love their chemistry, the ‘boss’ thing is cute, but lordt, I have to wonder if it’s meant to substitute for ‘shizun.’ But you know where this comparison really falls apart? Key isn’t really THAT much Luo Binghe.

At least, he isn’t in terms of personality. I mean, we’ve got the mysterious magical heritage, the healing factor, the unbeatable fighting skills, being beaten repeatedly because of the protagonist (tbh it’s sexier when she’s responsible, rather than just being a bystander), being yeeted into the abyss, I mean the ravine, to rise again and assume power as the merciless ruler of all the land. Oh, and he comes back from the dead still bearing the scar that represents her betrayal. In the original novel, he turned on her the moment he got his opening and was responsible for coming up with her gruesome torment.

(Also, Shen Qingqiu being terminally ill isn’t canon, but it’s very popular fanon, and it’s hard to ignore that with how hard the narrative lingers over Rae’s terminal illness as her gateway into this fictional world)

But! But the things that are different! Luo Binghe is a smart and sweet teenager, who had a rough start on the streets and has a tragically deceased single adoptive parent, but that’s their only backstory parallel, he doesn’t blacken until he’s thrown into the abyss. Not like Key, Key is a murder-happy sociopath, a former street kid who fought the odds and made good, and who’s a lot sharper and cleverer than the upper classes think someone like him should be. He utterly destroyed a righteous cultivator clan, I mean glassblowing guild, for the sake of revenge. Once our heroine scores a number of trust points with him, we unlock secret backstory about how as a small child, he experienced deeply formative hand trauma.

He’s Xue Yang.

It took me a moment to process the wangxian allegations SRB mentions in her post, because I was trying to figure out how someone would be aware of wangxian, and read that backstory, and somehow miss it. But it’s fine, I’m pretty sure they were actually talking about the golden cobra and the last hope! So LET’S TALK MOSHANG.

It was so funny. I was liveblogging the book to friends, because honestly, I do not jive with the buffy-esque joss whedon relentless quip-quip-quip writing style. I was struggling to stay engaged when the narrative never took a moment to breathe. And I perked up at the introduction of this new character! He seemed kind of fun, kind of meta, Key came over to share Secret Info with him, and I messaged the friend who recced this to me (also an svsss appreciator) ‘lol, what if he’s shang qinghua. just straight from svsss shang qinghua.'

Reader, a second transmigrator has hit the narrative.

Now, in some ways, he’s a disappointment to me. He’s not nearly as interesting as Shang Qinghua. Adding the author to their own narrative is way more fascinating to me than just dropping a rando into the story. But I’ll take what I can get, I think multiple transmigrators are almost always a fun decision. And for the queer reasons I mentioned above, I think Shang Qinghua ties into the themes of his novel a lot more strongly than Eric does here. I don’t want to call him ‘the golden cobra’ every time, I get more self-conscious every time I write it. And honestly, the reveal of Eric’s full Eric Whatever name feels a little awkward and… pointed compared to the sheer opacity of Shang Qinghua’s existence. Never mind what his name was in the real world, we don’t even know his name before he was a Peak Lord. I’m not upset we got a name or anything, it would make certain fannish activities a lot easier if Shang Qinghua had additional canon names, but it was an interesting detail in light of how parallel the characters are.

Okay! He’s not the author! He’s still a super-fan. He transmigrated into the book years before the LLE main character, and has settled in pretty well. According to canon as Rae knows it, he’s fated to be killed by his own favorite character. He’s fast-thinking and fast-talking, and scattered and all over the place, but dangerous when cornered and more competent than he looks. He deals in information and manages a network of spies. He’s a creative! He and the main character banter relentlessly and get along like a house on fire. He and the king’s trusted ice-cold right hand man share a weird codependent dynamic that’s part hostile, part homoerotic.

Marius has complicated feelings about not-shang-qinghua. Eric is a coward, he’d rather talk fast and lie than stand up for anything, he cowers and cringes and isn’t honorable. He and Mobei-jun also shared a deeply formative experience in their youth, where as a teenager in distress, Eric/Shang Qinghua appeared before them and announced their devotion. In Shang Qinghua’s case, it was offering to serve him (and saving him from huan hua injuries), and in Eric’s case, it was declaring him to be his favorite character (and saving him from sad teenaged isolation), but man. And in the end, after a long, fraught relationship, Marius/Mobei-jun is furious and strangely distraught when Eric/Shang Qinghua abandons him.

Guys, it’s not wangxian.

I think it hits less hard when Marius’s themes of family violence aren’t allowed to sit directly in the narrative, and when it seems like some vague berserker rage thing rather than Linguang-jun just bluntly wanting to murder him for practical reasons, but hey! This was still, genuinely, one of my favorite parts of the story. I wanted more more more of them, I would read this moshang au any day.

After that, the parallels get a little more nebulous! The comparisons between the abyss and the ravine are pretty obvious. I’m not sure why we decided to build our city and palace right on top of the pit of people-eating ghouls rather than literally anywhere else, but it means we don’t need to take a special field trip to Jue Di Gorge, which means we can do the bait and switch where it turns out Key was a heavenly demon all along. The temperamental King Octavian, the young master of the palace, one might even say the xiao gongzhu if they were feeling spicy, jealously tries to romantically monopolize half our main ship and has the other half flogged with a magic whip.

I already mentioned that Rae brings up that Liu Mingyan — wait, I said I’d change some answers so it wasn’t obvious I copied — Lia doesn’t get a sex scene in the books even though loads of other people did, just like Shen Qingqiu praises Liu Mingyan for her untouchable image in such an oversexed, gratuitous book. I don’t think it would be right to call Liu Mingyan a white lotus heroine in either SVSSS or PIDW, but her archetype is in that wheelhouse, and Lia is just a white lotus rival played straight (and played deliberately, another touch I liked). We don’t have made up animals like black moon rhinoceros pythons in LLE, but we do have leucrotas, which are like a lion and a hyena and serve no narrative purpose.

Oh, you know what else I forgot to mention? Rae gives Key one of her red ruby earrings, and he refuses to sell it, and stubbornly holds onto it until the bitter end. Is this Xue Yang holding onto the last piece of candy Xiao Xingchen gave him, or is it Hua Cheng determinedly keeping Xie Lian’s red coral earring with him even through his own death? Por que no los dos?

There are things that are original in here. I know that this presentation undersells how much of the book is original. The trouble is, almost everything I thought was good is something that either was lifted from another person’s creative endeavors, or is being tainted by association with all the other naked lifts. Some of the noble ladies have an archery contest! That’s pretty new and fresh, huh? We didn’t have any archery contests in SVSSS!

Yeah, but we sure did in MDZS. And MDZS is already in play, because we’ve already got one character who’s just copy and paste Xue Yang.

There’s a thermocline of trust in this book that fell off for me sharply, and it turned a lot of this into a guessing game of ‘wait NOW what the refrance? owo'

I’m probably on a hair trigger by now, but I’ve also probably missed some things. And I’m sure this is a synthesis of multiple influences, because most stories are. But this feels like cooking and trying to season your dish with a little salt and then the container lid just falls off.

Emer isn’t a clear parallel to an existing character! Love that for her! Love a lady with an axe, especially if she gets a nice girlfriend! On the other hand, in terms of backstory? Wow, she’s been raised with our protagonist since early childhood, as not-quite-foster-siblings, but she was always the clear unfavorite and harbors a lot of resentment over that. Oh, and once Rae entered the story, Rae started trying to speedrun an enemies to 'hello hiiii we should bestiessss' arc with her. I think she had to have an axe, because a whip or a sword would make the Jiang Cheng and/or Liu Qingge vibes a little uncomfortably strong. She doesn’t follow their character arcs! But the disappointing thing is that it felt like she was just there to facilitate pasting the frankenstein patchwork of the narrative together rather than having an arc of her own.

(why did Marius stop to give her a sword lesson? Why did she immediately sneak onto the roof to eavesdrop on the king?? It’s hard to give her credit for being an original character when none of her original actions make sense in the greater universe)

Oh, I almost forgot, we’ve even got magic plot macguffin plants. While Binghe is in the abyss, Shen Qingqiu needs to get the Sun And Moon Dew Flower Seed so he can build an escape hatch for himself before Binghe wrecks his shit. Rae, on the other hand, needs to secure the Flower of Life and Death by an arbitrary deadline as an escape hatch so she can go back to her original life rather than being trapped here forever. Very different! There’s even little side tangents about how these plants can be so beneficial to others, Zhuzhi-lang is desperately trying to secure a seed to build a new body for Tianlang-jun (which Shen Qingqiu enables him to do, despite not knowing what he wants it for), and Rae thinks about how the flower could “save someone on the very doorstep of death,” and gives it away for that exact purpose. So different!

I need to cut myself off, otherwise I’ll keep going. Truly, there is original content in here. It was just all the stuff I didn’t like. The character quipping was. God. There sure was a lot of it! By sheer volume, that’s a lot of original content. Some of the extended cast was interesting, I enjoyed the Horrors and their brothers, I liked Valencia. Now, I didn’t like how basically every girl ADULT WOMAN in this cast was in shitty teen mean girl mode. I didn’t like how immature every character interaction period was. I lost track of how many times Rae was going around in sexy clothes and rando servants were like “HARLOT,” out loud about a favored noblewoman, you know, as you do. Especially when her bodyguard is pulling against his choke chain just waiting for an excuse to do a murder. I don’t need Rae to be the picture of flawless maturity. But nobody is mature, full stop, not even the set dressing servants.

For a less loaded example, the cumplane friendship dynamic is here, practically intact. Shen Qingqiu can't snipe about authorial choices, because Eric isn't the author, so instead Rae and Eric squabble about favorite scenes and favorite ships and such. But it isn't nearly as charming when we don't see these two characters dropping their dignified Peak Lord cultivator roleplay to talk shit with each other. Rae and Eric never have a filter once in this book. They are always Like This, it isn't a secret face that gets unlocked when they're bouncing off each other, they are never circumspect, never have a filter, never have any idea they shouldn't be speaking their full thoughts at full volume 24/7. Even after this starts to have material consequences when they're inevitably overheard! It's an immersion-breaking level of immaturity, which is terribly frustrating when the original dynamic that I loved is only changed in such minor ways.

And another thing that actually tastes way more sour than it did on first reading – Valencia is probably the least mean girl of all the women in the cast. She’s delightful. Too bad that in every scene but her last one, Rae, who repeatedly references her own experiences having her body and appearance ravaged by cancer, cannot for love or money stop talking about how uggo Valencia is.

I know this is an adult novel. The characters are, by age, adults. There’s almost an oral scene. God, I wish we’d gotten the oral scene. But by every other metric, the characters are all high schoolers and I’m an exhausted adult muttering to myself ‘they’ll grow out of it, please GOD let them grow out of it.’

Again, none of this is a crime! Nobody forced me to finish the book! And I did enjoy the book. Parts of it! But that very distinct partial enjoyment experience almost forced me to dissect my own emotional response. And truly, other than a few flashes like Valencia, almost everything I enjoyed about the book was something I could trace directly back to one author, and mostly to one book by that one author. I… enjoyed half of the book. And if I can track most of that half back to mxtx and svsss, I really think that says something about how much wasn’t done to make the inspiration behind this book the author’s own.

It's disappointing! I read this book because I like svsss, I read it because I want more books like svsss, I read it because I trawl the novelupdates tags looking for more books that will hit me the way svsss did. It doesn’t taste good to be served reheated svsss with expired buffy sauce drizzled on top. It tastes even less good once I have a minute to think about what turning an m/m meditation on sexuality and self-image and assumptions about others into a m/f snooze does to the themes I loved so much. It stings to see an author rehash a book that was/is so important to me, and see what they kept and what they threw out, and be like ‘oh, so… these were the elements that mattered to you?’

Again, I hate to be redundant with this, but. I think calling this book plagiarism would be overdoing it. I think it’s tasteless. I don’t think being tasteless is a crime. It remains wild to me that she’s getting messages calling out her supposed inspiration, even if I’m simultaneously criticizing the judgment of the people making those specific comparisons. And I ABSOLUTELY understand why she’s reluctant to own up to the specific inspirations behind this book, because good lord. If it was me, I’d be professionally embarrassed too.

It’s not my job to be the book quality police, but I think someone as experienced as this should be able to do a better job of synthesizing inspirations into something original. I dropped ‘can’t afford to offend my scheming disciple’ earlier this year, because that narrative couldn’t shake the taste of stale svsss fanfic, and it was much more subtle than this is. Once again, if I’m wrong, this post will be retroactively VERY funny and I’ll be all ears to see what her inspirations actually were. I don’t think I’m wrong.

[mcytshipmadness]

I desperately miss flower husbands

Like genuinely, I want them back.

I get it, ranchers is funky (/pos) and wholesome and all

But I kind of hate the fact that pol just like... left flower husbands completely and now ppl call it toxic.

Ik there are still flower husbands shippers out there, obviously, but like... yk what I mean?

And I've seen someone say before in refute to the whole "guys it's a block game, it's rily not toxic to hit someone in a BLOCK GAME" saying that: "yeah, it's a block game, so why did u call them husbands?"

DID YA'LL FORGET THAT SCOTT STARTED IT?? DID YA'LL FORGET THAT SCOTT STARTED THE

"husband" PART OF IT?? HAD SCOTT NOT SAID

"nope, we're married now" (or whatever he said idk I'm dying rn yextkctixitxt) WHEN JIMMY GAVE HIM THE POPPY WE PROB WOULDNT HAVE CALLED THEM FLOWER HUSBANDS. HAD SCOTT NOT LITERALLY SCREAMED "NOO MY HUSBAND!" WHEN JIMMY DIES FOR THE SECOND TIME, DO U THINK WE WOULD HAVE CALLED THEM HUSBANDS??? DO U??? WE PROBABLY WOULD HAVE CALLED THEM LIKE FLOWER BOYFRIENDS OR SMTH

PLEASERE PEOPLE STOP CALLING THEM TOXIC I SWEAR TO GOD THEY'RE NOT.

LIKE HAVE YOU SEEN EMPIRES SEASON 1????

HAVE YOU SEEN IT??? THEY'RE SO VGTIDTIERSTIDKDKTDKTDOY

Anyway

Sorry for yapping in ur inbox I was feeling a bit emo

Them <3

You're completely, fine, I'm literally here for yapping about ships at XD

But FR, ships will always have their haters, but people completely dropped FH after Double Life.

JUSTICE FOR FLOWER HUSBANDS

[penkura]

Special [2/2]

Note: Second part from this request here! Sorry it took so long, I've been burnt out and just struggling to get things out lately. I'll have an update post later today, I think.

Sanji really does feel awful when he realizes what’s going on with you, why you walked away and said you wouldn’t bother anymore. He hates how he’s made you feel, without even realizing it, but he never expected you would actually like him back. He’d resigned himself to the fact that, in his mind, you didn’t have any feelings for him nor would you ever. He’s used to it but for some reason it hit harder when he thought it was you that would reject him.

So he never said anything. He treated you normally, as normally as he could when he thought you were so perfect, but it seems like he's made a mistake. He’s made you think there’s something wrong with the way you look, when it couldn’t be farther from the truth. Nami has heard it so much from him she’s started rolling her eyes while Sanji nearly cries to her about how much he adores you.

No, how much he loves you. He’s not told anyone else, only Nami, making her concern3d the moment she notices you avoiding and ignoring him. Once she gets Sanji to tell her what happened, she’s so close to smacking him upside the head for being so stupid.

“Of course she’s upset, you’re an idiot!”

Nami spends the better part of her afternoon berating Sanji, who cant even argue with her and just nods in agreement to everything she says. She stops him before he can even ask for ideas on what to do so he can make it up to you.

“No, you’re doing that yourself this time.”

It takes him most of the day to decide what he could do, what he could say, so it surprises you when he finally shows up after dinner that evening. He’s not looking you in the eyes, but he has your favorite flowers with him, it makes your heart ache a bit, believing he’s done this to every girl he’s ever upset in the past so you don’t move to take the flowers. You’re trying to stop your feelings, he's making it so hard though.

“Sanji—”

“[Y/N], I’m so sorry I made you feel like you aren’t special to me. I…it’s no excuse, but I didn’t think you’d ever have feelings for me like I do for you so I was trying to distract myself from you,” it starts to make sense, but you still don’t move, you’re not entirely sure you can trust him, “If you never forgive me I deserve it, but…can you give me a second chance? No, that’s not right…let me have the chance to make it up to you, and prove you’re so much more than to me than you think you are.”

You’re both quiet for a few moments, Sanji believes you’re completely done with him while you think it through.

A conflict between crewmates over something is always a possibility, but when it’s due to romantic feelings it feels weirdly worse to you. It feels like you’re letting it take over everything, but you’ve had these feelings for so long that you aren’t sure they’ll ever go away, even if you are trying to stop it. You still want to be his friend if nothing else, though it almost seems like he may want something more.

That’s something to discuss later.

Sanji starts to feel like things will get better when you reach out and take the flowers, not looking at him even when he looks up at you.

“…you can make my favorite dessert to start…and explain yourself better.”

The grin on his face makes you smile just a little bit in return, as Sanji nods and takes your hand to bring you to the kitchen.

“I’ll start right away while you put those in water! I’ll make you whatever drink you want too!”

“That sounds nice, Sanji…”

Before you get too much farther, Sanji stops and pulls you into a hug that you return.

“I’m sorry I made you feel like you weren’t special to me…you mean more to me than anyone else in the world.” You’re going to choose to believe him, especially when Sanji goes the extra mile to make sure you know how much he loves you.

[lostinthewoodsomewhere]

I'm in a writing kind of mood, having many thoughts, so here's a little thing from a Jesse and Alan thing I'm working on if you're interested, cause I've been thinking about it again...🫡🙃🫡

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Faden shifted in her seat a little, mouth turning down just a fraction.

“Wake, there are certain… tests that my staff want to carry out, regarding your relationship with the shaded presence” she began, and Wake had expected this, of course he had, though he hadn’t quite expected this reaction.

“You seem uncomfortable with the idea” he said, and Jesse all but snorted.

“You could say that, yeah. Look, I’m no stranger to tests, God knows Emily has put me through enough since becoming Director, but I always fully understood what I was getting into. I just… I wanted to make sure that you knew as well, before you agreed to anything”.

“You don’t need to be so worried about me, Director”, he replied, which earned him a little frown, “I hurt a lot of people trying to get out of the dark place. Some invasive testing is probably the least I can endure to make up for it”.

It had obviously been the wrong thing to say, as Faden’s expression turned sharp, raw in a way he hadn’t seen from her yet, so fixated that she was on playing the role of Director.

“Don’t, Wake. I won’t pretend that I understand everything that’s happened, hell maybe you do deserve some retribution, I don’t know. What I do know, is that’s not my, or my staff’s decision to make. I’m not going to lock you up and hurt you Wake, not going to force you into things that are uncomfortable. I need your word that you will tell us to stop if you get uncomfortable, that you’re not going to just let us do whatever because you think you deserve this. If you want some divine retribution to make yourself feel better, that’s fine, but you’re not getting it from me”.

Alan studied her again, not quite sure what he was looking for. This point was important to her, and he should know why, but it wasn’t coming to him just yet. He tried to conjure up every concept of Jesse Faden in his mind to make sense of her. Words flashed in his brain, Director-Leader- Parautilitarian-Receiver-Guiding Star-

Sibling.

[cerise-on-top]

Hiiii :3 and could you do Kate laswell and könig with a reader who loved cuddles?

Hey there! Sure I can! But I don't write Laswell as very cuddly! But I made König's a bit longer to try and make up for it, hope that's alright!

Laswell and König with a Cuddly!Reader

Laswell: If you love cuddles then she’s the wrong person to ask for some, sorry. Sometimes she doesn’t mind them, sometimes she absolutely hates being touched. It’s very rare for her to initiate anything more than just a kiss to your cheek or a hand on your back for a short amount of time. Laswell genuinely is not a cuddly person, at all. Sometimes, on a good day, she might oblige if you ask her to. However, even then your cuddle sessions won’t be too long. And if I were you then I wouldn’t force her to cuddle you either, she’ll get snappy if you do. Your relationship is built on mutual trust and respect. You’re violating her boundaries if you force her to cuddle. Sorry, but that’s just how I’ve been writing her.

König: He’s not too fond of cuddles either, but he makes exceptions for his S/O. If you’re his S/O, that’s great! You can ask him for some cuddles and he’ll only very rarely say no to you. It’s usually when he’s busy that he’ll say no, but any other time? He’s free game. Again, you’re the only person he’s somewhat cuddly with. However, unlike Laswell, he sometimes will ask you for some cuddles himself. Sometimes even the big guy needs to hold someone, or even be held. I’ve said it before, but if you’re roughly the same size as him, or even taller than him, then he might hint at wanting to be held from time to time as well. But other than that, he’ll humor you. You can cuddle in any position you want, but he refuses to lie down on top of you. Even when you’re the same size as him, he won’t do it. König is aware he’s a very heavy lad, so he really doesn’t want to crush you. But if you wanna lie on top of him, then you can go right ahead, he really doesn’t mind. In those cases he actually quite likes it when you’re shorter than he is, because in that case you can lie on top of him in your entirety. He’ll wrap his arms around you, sometimes he’ll kiss the top of your head as well. Spooning with him is pretty nice. He’s a strong guy, and a warm one at that as well. Don’t ask him to cuddle you in summer, though, as he gets sweaty fairly easily and doesn’t want to gross you out. Besides, he also doesn’t want to sweat bullets just because you’re clinging to him. But you’re more than welcome to just plop down in his lap during any other season and nuzzle into him. He’ll call you “meine kleine Schmusekatze” or, if you’re being especially clingy, “mein kleines Schmusebärchen”. I think that eventually, when he comes home from an especially rough mission, he actually kind of looks forward to holding you. It’s not that unlikely that you might get hurt because of him, so it’s nice to get to hold you and make sure you’re safe within his arms. Sometimes, while you’re cuddling, he’ll tease you by speaking his dialect. He’s saying no mean things, though. It’s either how cute you are, how you can’t understand him, or just some random things he thought of at the moment. Even if you know German he’ll lay his dialect on extra thick so you can’t actually understand him.

[chaoticlandworlder]

[rimouskis]

can I be so open and vulnerable with you guys. the card I was given from people at my old office was sincerely so nice and really validating but also I feel like the main impression I left other people with was "she's really nice" WHICH IS GOOD, I DO WANT TO BE KNOWN AS NICE but also part of me is like... should I maybe strive for "innovative" or "creative" or "a go-getter" because being The Nice One just feels a little mealy-mouthed of me y'know?

[tanicus-caesareth]

guarana drama, damage control

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

before legends ZA comes out and totally destroys my going hcs i guess i should say my piece, anyway i think X is the "canonical" game bc fairies, BUT, i also think that, while xerneas has historically been kalos' patron deity, yveltal was actually galar's. and much like how deities irl can get telephoned around over time, while yveltal's power over death was always... present, to galar, it wasn't the ruler of death. it represented conquest and victory, to them. it was only after yveltal fell into its cocoon and was slowly forgotten that the kalosian interpretation of it as death became commonplace.

relatedly, the kalos war that happened 3000ya was a war between it and galar, which ultimately culminated in the firing of the ultimate weapon and the darkest day, which were actually a singular event. and the war was centered on the great crater, and the region around it, which wouldn't become paldea for another thousand years. they were both interested in it bc yveltal and xerneas are both believed to have originated from the crater (see: xerneas' crystal horns) & therefore it's both religiously significant and a source of great physical power—the ultimate weapon was actually built using a scant few fragments of crystal recovered from the crater directly. (though the great crater has always been super impenetrable so they were gathered at great cost from the very upper regions & this is not a feat kalos could probably repeat)

also, it was only after the war ended that zygarde appeared. zygarde's always an enigmatic figure, but in essence it's the crater's cleanup crew. it scavenges divine energy to bring back. this is also why it shows up in alola.

[queen0fm0nsterz]

Reading my fave thin man and lady fic. Kicking my feet a lot because tbh. Sometimes a sad man really is just a weird woman's science project in a way that is so homoerotic

[coquelicoq]

i just saw someone say that "the vast majority of the userbase is complaining" about tumblr's recent layout change. i see this a lot after a change: people complaining about it (sometimes without saying what about it is bad, making it sound like either it's self-evident (it usually is not) or just that it's bad because it's change and change is always bad) and saying that everyone else is complaining about it too. i don't know how to tell you this but a) you don't follow every user on tumblr so how can you possibly know what "everyone" or "the majority of users" thinks about anything and b) ONLY THE PEOPLE WHO FEEL VERY STRONGLY ARE TALKING ABOUT IT!! people who are not bothered are not spending time posting about how unbothered they are! please look up "selection bias" and stop making me read this nonsense with my own eyeballs.

[essektheylyss]

Not gonna lie, both vindicating but also deeply sad that every single literary magazine I've looked at recently, having visited those site in the past, has edited their submission requirements to specify that AI work will not be considered.

And at the same time, I'm extremely fearful of how many writers are going to give up writing when it becomes impossible to tell AI from real anymore, and markets are utterly saturated with content to the point that getting anything published is nearly impossible as scammers try to make some quick change.

I imagine it wouldn't be worth it in the long run as a scam, because it doesn't exactly pay to write these days even prior to this, so it may then die out within a couple of years, though that might be optimistic given the plagiarism that makes it into the Amazon self-publishing realm. But even still, I do worry that in the meantime it's going to push writers out and force already struggling lit mags to shut down, and I'm so, so worried about it.

[teddybeartoji]

i love how distinct your tags are like i can be scrolling through my feed and i see under a reblog “AHHHHHHHHHH LOSING MY MIND NGGFFFGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG :3” and i be like yup mickey was definitely here LOL 🙂‍↕️ (hope you been okay !! <3)

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 you can just hear some distant screaming and you know it's me losing my shit........ hdhsjvdhshshahs HEY THIS IS HOW I SHOW MY LOVE ALRIGHTTTTT THIS IS THE WAYYY!!!!!!!!!!!! loud tags are like a trademark of mine now i think...

ANYWAYY HII HI SERENA MY LOVEE!!!!!! i've been doing good and i hope you've been doing well too hehehehe ARE YOU REMEMBERING TO EAT AND TO DRINK WATER AND ALL THAT GOOD STUFF🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨 you better be.... ILYYYY!!!!!!!!

[piningpercussionist]

literally my favorite blog on tumblr. Ur perfect at being Kim Pine and I love the little notes it the tags :3

(^ this is me at you rn)

Thank you so much <333 it seriously means the world to me that people love/like my Kim stuff. AND to know that some of yall actually read my silly little notes

I try to keep her as in character as I can, and I feel I have been largely successful, for the most part. I feel like she comes fairly naturally to me- I only occasionally hit snags,, but usually that's just because I'm high or something and am overcome with the desire to Maximize The Silly shfgkjshjld She's so serious though, usually. I love her <3 I love getting to be her for The People