#I think I also figured out how clothing works since 2017

[bootyful-seventeen]

Quick question for the homies who have a bookshelf to display their kpop albums and/or mangas and figures, what kind of method or style do you like?

[onakomiyaki]

just a silly crush (not) pt. 1.5

pairing : daniel ricciardo x childhood friend-brabham!reader ; lewis hamilton x reader (implied, platonic relationship)

summary : lewis make sure that you and daniel finally talk after the bahrain incident. or he will take matters in his own way.

warning: unedited and rushed work (I GOT INSPIRED AFTER TWO CANS OF REDBULL RAAAAAAHHHH), harsh words, childhood trauma (kinda), slowburn.

a/n : this is an extra chapter where lewis playing cupid for you and daniel. you can definitely skipped this chapter since this chapter is originally added to the first chapter.

masterlist

consider tonight's meeting (and reconciliation) a huge success, totally worth the money you spent on the party. one of perks of being the daughter of david brabham is that your can splurge on unimportant things; this party, for example, and your father won't even bat an eye.

and maybe the fact that you are one of high paid supermodel–plus an actress so you don't think about money that much.

other than this party, you really need to thank max for his genius plan. maybe a new watch or some new designer clothes for the dutch will do.

"(y/n)!"

you turned your body, eyes lit up at the view of the mighty lewis hamilton.

"what took you so long?" you asked, hugging the brit as he kiss your temple.

for some people lewis's gesture might be mistaken as love-like affection. but of course you know that it is not like that at all. lewis had always see you as his annoying little sister who he love dearly and you saw him as the big brother you never had. while you do have a younger brother, sam, things with you and lewis are just... different.

"if i say traffic, would you believe me?" he sheepishly said.

and to that you let out a dry–mocking–laugh. "really? traffic? here in monaco?" you said.

"alright alright. i might–i said might–met binotto." he stated, letting out a sigh.

"mattia binotto? that's-"

"ferrari's current principal, yes." he nod, hands snug inside his pockets.

"they want you huh? interesting." you said, fingers cradling your own jaw.

although you hate formula one, you being the daughter of david brabham of course would know a thing or two. including all the current principals of all 10 teams.

lewis let out a chuckle, shrugging his shoulder. "maybe."

you rolled your eyes at his attic, shaking your head at his secretiveness. he won't be able to keep any secret from you, you're too smart for that. and lewis is aware.

what is not so smart of you is your inability to figure out about daniel's hints and feeling for the past 10 plus years. maybe more, lewis believe.

he always notice how daniel's eyes always lights up when he saw your instagram posts, or your appearance at the latest fashion magazine. he even rambling non-stop at your first big screen debut in 2017, not only to his teammate max, but to almost all the driver on the grid. almost, because most of the drivers are just confused and was there to humor the aussie. sebastian vettel though–god bless that man–always there for him, sharing the same excitement even cheering him up.

he also remember how dejected he looks when your father visited one of the race in 2015, hoping that you would show up beside your father despite your hatred towards the sport. but instead, he saw sam, your younger brother, calmly walking beside your father.

so it is safe to say he knew it all too well. and he honestly feel sort of sympathy for both you and daniel.

"have you talk to him yet?" he asked, averting the conversation about his meeting with binotto.

"that, i have." you simply said, grabbing two glass of champagne passed by the waitress.

lewis gracefully accept the other glass and clinked his glass with yours. "and how it goes?"

you went silent, gnawing your bottom lip nervously. "it went... well." you said, voice unsure.

"oh?"

"he asked me to watch the race. in monza." you stated.

lewis nods, letting out an acknowledgement hum as he sip his champagne.

"you should come, (y/n). its been 10 years since his first race, and yet, you haven't attend any of them in person." he simply stated.

"well i did watch the race from my house in monaco." you muttered. lewis shaking his head to your reaction.

"its not fair for him, you know? you guys are best friend for almost 20 years now, you said it yourself."

yeah, bestfriend. he thought.

you went silence, eyes trailed down to the floor. the expensive marble beneath your louboutin heels seems more interesting than lewis now, and he notice.

"i just don't want you to live in regrets in the future, (y/n)" he said, patting your shoulder as he walk away from you–giving you some space to think about what he just said.

"i know lewis." you whisper to yourself.

daniel, who currently enjoying his alone time at the bar, was greeted with a familiar figure walking towards him. he fix his posture, sitting straighter as the figure sat beside him and he watch in silent. daniel is still wary of this man so he just wait for him to break the silence first.

"let me join you for awhile, mate." he said.

"lewis."

"honeybadger."

hearing his nickname make daniel chuckle. thanks to you who actually give him that nickname years ago, back when you and him still go karting together, it stuck with him. and honestly he don't mind. because it was given by you.

"no company?" lewis simply asked.

"well, i was dragged by the ferrari duo, little lando, and the lovebird but they are gone now." daniel explain, politely asking the bartender for another refill.

"the lovebird?"

"max and kelly."

"ah, yes... the new hot couple." lewis nods, flashing his charming smile at the younger driver.

"yeah, i don't want to be a thirdwheel or dancing with dj norris and his two minions so here i am." he said, returning the smile to his senior as he pointed at the dj podium where lando is already getting on. carlos and charles was dancing like a maniac with drinks on their hands.

lewis raised his eyebrows, genuinely shocked and impressed at the young brit secret talent as a dj. "never knew little lando is a party animal." he said.

"i might be the one who responsible for that–to be a party animal i mean." daniel chuckled, shaking his head.

"well, he learn from the best then." and with that both daniel and lewis share a laugh, clinking their glass together.

as daniel enjoy his 3rd? 4th? glass of whiskey that night, lewis give him a small pats on his back. and daniel, confused at the gesture, watch lewis with a small frown.

"you have the patience of a saint, daniel. i won't last that long if i were you," he said, finishing his drink. "i gave up after got rejected for a second date."

lewis's cryptic messages, plus the familiar tipsy feeling, make him confused even more.

"huh?"

"goodluck, mate. i am rooting for you." he said, flashing him a smile before walking away from him.

"what just happen..." daniel muttered as he finish his glass of whiskey and decided to join dj norris and the minions.

what a night...

prev || next

[sissylittlefeather]

How the Web Was Woven: Chapter 11

A/N: I'm on a roll with this one right now, so I figured I'd go ahead and publish this. ICYMI, this is the soulmate/time travel AU with Elvis and a fem!reader.

Need to catch up? Here's my Masterlist.

Warnings: 18+ minors DNI, kissing, cussing, p in v penetrative sex, unprotected sex, creampie, and biting 😏

Word count: ~3k

Somehow, you're pregnant with the child of Elvis Presley.

******

On March 12, 2017 you give birth to a beautiful, healthy baby boy. You name him John Jessie and he has your hair and Elvis's bright blue eyes. When the doctor hands him to you, you weep openly for so many reasons, but mainly because you wish Elvis could be there to see him.

And sure, you could've made a portal sometime while you were pregnant or in that first year, but you didn't. First because you were afraid he'd change his mind about staying in his time, and second because you wanted his first experience of fatherhood to be with Lisa Marie.

But once Lisa is born, you start to think about telling him. In the evenings when you rock John Jessie to sleep, the desire to let his father know about him overwhelms you. The same thing inside you that made you tell him about your engagement all those years ago is now telling you to find him and tell him about his son.

You even have the wild inclination to pack John Jessie up and bring him with you. You consider going to his time forever and just living as an unknown girlfriend. But you think about what it would mean for Elvis if anyone found out you were there with his son. His reputation would be ruined. And aside from that, you don't want to risk taking him away from Lisa Marie in any way. There's no telling how Priscilla might react if she ever found out about you.

So instead you pack up an envelope of pictures for him to see, put it in your bag filled with vintage clothes, leave John Jessie with your mom, and head to California in June of 2018. He's filming the Singer Presents Elvis special, better known now as the '68 Comeback Special, so you know exactly where to find him. Furthermore, you know he's living at the studio, so you'll be able to get to him alone more easily than if he was at home.

You don't know how he might respond to finding out he has another child, especially one that he might never get to see and definitely won't get to raise. Still, you have to risk it. He deserves to know.

******

When you get to California, you check into your hotel and get dressed. You're going to have to find a way to sneak into the studio since it's been closed to the public for a while now. You pray that fate will be on your side again, as it always has been for the two of you.

You take a cab to the studio, but the driver won't let you off in front of it. Instead you have to get out at the corner and walk over to it. You walk all the way around the large building trying to find a way in and start to get nervous that it's not going to work. You're also dodging security the whole time and you're exhausted after trying for several hours. The sun is low in the sky when you lean your back against one of the doors and almost break down crying.

******

Elvis was unbelievably nervous to begin filming for the special. In fact, he tried to refuse at the last second, but the producer insisted. After several hours of filming, he demands a break.

"I need some air." He says, looking for a door to escape and try to relax. He had finally begun to feel comfortable on stage, but there is a different kind of nervous energy possessing him now. There's a feeling in his stomach like something is about to happen, but he has no idea what it could possibly be. He gets his answer when he finally gets outside to find the buzzing sound and wavy air hovering right in front of him.

He turns and looks back at the door to the studio and then back at the portal. His life is finally starting to be what he wants. He doesn't want to leave now. And he has his child to think of. Still, he's desperate to see you, to hold you, and feel you against him. He cares for Priscilla, that is true, but his heart still belongs to you.

******

You stand there in complete shock that you were able to find a portal here outside the building. You take a deep breath, grab your suitcase, and walk through. Thankfully, he's alone when you appear out of thin air.

"Hi." You say cautiously. He's an absolute vision standing there in his black leather outfit. Your heart is beating so hard and so loud that you wonder if he can hear it. He seems to be trying to decide how to respond. "I'm sorry to just-"

In one step, he's wrapped around you with his lips pressed to yours. He takes your face in his hands and kisses both of your cheeks and then your mouth again. The scent of cologne, sweat, and cigarillos envelops you and you could cry with the familiarity of it. Neither of you has to speak to know what's being communicated. He just holds you and strokes your hair and you rest your head against his chest. You're in this position when one of his guys pokes his head out of the door.

"Hey EP they're... oh shit, sorry." He averts his eyes like you're naked or something. "They need you to come film some more."

"Okay." Elvis speaks into your hair, his voice muffled. "Come watch. I'll find you somewhere to sit."

You pull back away from him and nod. He puts his hand on the small of your back and ushers you inside. He takes your suitcase and stashes it somewhere quickly. Then, he finds you a place to sit and heads back up to the stage.

He records the sit-down portion of the show with his old band and you melt a hundred times. You haven't seen him perform for a real audience before. Its electrifying. In varying waves, your heart is filled with love and affection and then you're so turned on you could crawl up on the stage and fuck him right there in front of all these people.

You fidget with your ring to distract yourself and realize that you wore it here. You really didn't intend to, but you've been wearing it since he gave it to you, so it was habit to put it on this morning. Somewhere inside you, he's still your husband. Priscilla might have his time, but you have his heart. When you have this thought you panic for a second that she's here. You swivel your head around frantically looking for her. From the stage, he notices your mood has changed. He catches your eye and gives you the slightest inquisitive look. You mouth Priscilla? and he shakes his head ever so slightly, so you relax back into your seat. The whole exchange is less than ten seconds long and thankfully, no one notices.

Finally, they finish the set and he's done filming for the night. You stay in your seat, not sure what to do. Should you go to him? Or will he find you? You see him standing in a group of guys laughing and talking. He doesn't seem to be coming for you, so you stand up and walk slowly towards him, without an inkling of what you'll do or say when you get to him. As you get closer, you hear him.

"Nah, guys, not tonight. I have other plans tonight."

"Other plans?" One of the guys looks at him curiously. Just then, you make it to the edge of the group and he notices you.

"Ah, speak of devil. Or angel, rather." He puts his arm around your shoulders in a casual and friendly gesture. "This is y/n. She's an old friend from Tupelo. I told her I'd show her around tonight."

One of the other guys raises his eyebrows and the others shuffle around nervously.

"Oh, calm down boys. She's married." He uses his other hand to hold up your hand and show them your ring.

"Not that that ever stopped you." One of the guys jokes. Elvis moves away from you and play punches the guy that said it.

"Okay, I'll see you guys later." With that, he puts his arm around your shoulders again and walks away. On the way out, he grabs your suitcase and then leads you to the room where he's living in the studio. Once you're inside, he shuts the door and locks it and then wraps himself around you again, kissing you deeply. When he finally pulls back, he looks into your face and laughs softly.

"Good thing you're still wearing your ring."

"Yeah that would've been hard to explain after you told them I was married."

"Yes. They don't need to know it's me you're married to." He leans in and kisses you passionately again. Then he pulls back suddenly. "It is still me, right? You're not here to tell me you married some other guy again, are ya?"

"No, it's still you I'm married to." You respond, laughing. "I am here to tell you something, though."

He looks at you curiously and tries to think of what you could possibly have to report.

"What, honey?" You pull away from him and walk to your suitcase.

"I think it's better if I just show you." You pull out the envelope of pictures and hold it in your hands, your heart pounding.

"Divorce papers?" He eyes the envelope and his eyebrows knit together in concern.

"No! No, not that at all. You should sit down, though." He walks to a chair and sits down carefully.

"You're scaring me, honey." You take a deep breath and look at the ceiling. Then, you extend your arm and hand him the envelope. He opens it cautiously and pulls out the stack of pictures. The first picture is one a nurse took in the hospital of you and John Jessie together right after he was born.

He looks up at you and his face is a mix of shock and confusion. He's not able to say anything, though, so he flips to the second picture. It's one of John Jessie that you took earlier this week.

"You... you had a baby?"

"I did."

"And the baby is this old... oh God." You watch him as he puts the pieces together. He looks at the date on the back of the first one and counts the months backwards. "This is my baby."

"Yes." You almost whisper it and he looks up at you, his eyes glistening with tears.

"I have a son." You're getting choked up now too, watching him.

"You do. His name is John Jessie." He stands up and wraps his arms around you, as the tears slide down his face.

"John Jessie Presley." He whispers into your hair. Then, he sniffs and stands up, looking down at the pictures. He flips through them and smiles, seeing his little boy grow from a newborn to the almost-toddler he is right now. When he gets to the end of the stack, he has a thought.

"Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I didn't want to distract you from Lisa Marie."

"Distract me?!"

"I wanted you to be focused on her." He shakes his head, but he can't argue with it. A different thought occurs.

"Why didn't you bring him with you? Where is he?"

"He's with my mom. I couldn't bring him here."

"Why not?"

"Do I need to spell out the headline for you? Elvis Presley's secret love child?"

"Oh, to hell with that. I want to see my boy."

"Did you forget that you have a wife here? Imagine how she would react."

"Again, I don't really care. He's my child."

"I just couldn't, Elvis. I can't mess with-"

"I swear to God, if you mention the damn timeline of history again, I'm gonna-"

"What? You're gonna what, Elvis?"

"I WANT TO SEE MY CHILD." He yells at you for the first time ever. He's yelled near you before, but never directly at you because he's angry with you. You stand there defiantly, both of you breathing heavily. "Take your clothes off. We're making a portal. You're gonna go get him and come back here."

"I'm not bringing him here."

"Goddamnit, y/n, then why did you tell me?!"

"I don't know. I guess I shouldn't have!" Your eyes begin to well up.

"You're damn right you shouldn't have. Now I get to live with the knowledge that I don't get to raise my own son." With that, the dam breaks and you begin to cry. He's right. You're ready to curl up and die when it hits you and you stop crying and look up at him.

"Come back with me."

"I can't leave Lisa."

"No, not like permanently. Just come with me and see him. The portals reopen right where you left from, right?"

"Yeah I'm always right back where I was when I walked through originally. Unfortunately, because it meant I had to finish filming Spinout-"

"So then I can open a portal for you any time I want and you can come through and see him. Just for a little while and then go back!" His eyes sparkle with excitement and he picks you up and spins you around.

"Haha! Yes! I can be a part of his life!" You nod and he kisses your cheek. "Oh, thank you, y/n. God, I love you. I missed you so much."

"I love you too." He smiles and kisses you tenderly.

Then, he sets you back down on the ground and kisses you again with a renewed hunger this time, his tongue parting your lips and dipping into your mouth. His desire is contagious and before you know it you're tearing at his leather jacket while he kisses your neck. You get it off of his shoulders and rip the shirt up and over his head. He literally tears your dress at the zipper and yanks it off of you. In your uninhibited passion, you sink your teeth into his shoulder and he yelps.

"Oh my God, I'm sorry."

"Do it again." He whispers in your ear. You bite into the skin on his chest and he growls deep in his throat. He removes your bra and panties with an animalistic fervor and throws them across the room. You peel his leather pants off of him as quickly as possible and he tosses you on the couch. In a second, he's pushed into you and is pounding you with a new kind of power and confidence.

"God, yes! Yes!" You yell as he fills you over and over. He holds your hip with one hand and slams into you rhythmically. He grunts and nips at your shoulder.

"You like it when I fuck you hard, baby?"

"Mmmmm harder." You moan.

"Yes ma'am." He listens to instructions and crashes into you even harder. There's a desperate kind of passion in the way he fucks you and it's everything you've needed for the last two years. He's needed it too; you can tell by the pace of his thrusts. He kisses your mouth, hard, and you bite his bottom lip. The way he drives into you is raw and dirty and makes you scream as you come as hard as you ever have while he pumps in and out of you.

"Fuck yes." He grunts through gritted teeth as he continues to pound against your hips while you pulse around him. Finally, he succumbs to the intensity of your sex and shoots you full of his warmth. As he comes, you bite him again on the chest and he lets out a guttural groan that makes you want to climb on top and fuck him again. He's dripping sweat and it mixes with your own as he collapses on top of you, both of you struggling to catch your breath.

The portal appears and he groans and rolls off of you. You scramble off the couch and try to get your clothes together. You cannot find your bra, though, and you have to dig through your suitcase for a new dress since he ruined the one you were wearing. You catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror and gasp. You look like a wild animal with your fucked out eyes and hair everywhere. You're desperately trying to smooth your hair when you hear a small pop and the portal disappears.

"Oh shit." He looks at you and laughs. He stops trying to get dressed, settling for just pants, and drops back down on the couch. He produces a cigarillo from somewhere and pats the couch next to him. You pick up his black shirt and pull it on over your head and then sit next to him, lightly running your fingers over the bite marks on his chest and shoulder.

"I marked you."

"It's a good thing we're going to your time. I can't go home like this." He chuckles and lights the cigarillo, taking a long drag.

"We missed the portal." You say offhandedly.

"I guess we'll just have to have sex again."

"Oh, darn." You respond playfully, taking the cigarillo and putting it in your own mouth.

"I didn't know you smoked."

"I guess I can still surprise you."

"My wife, the mystery." He puts his arm around you and takes the cigarillo back.

You stay like that on the couch for most of the night, just talking and passing the cigarillo back and forth. You tell him all about John Jessie and he tells you about Lisa and how excited he is for the potential future of his career after the special. Eventually you fall asleep on his chest and wake up to a loud knocking on the door.

"Fuck." He sits up quickly.

"We're gonna start recording in an hour, EP. I know you like a warning..."

"Yeah, I'll be there." He hollers and then looks at you and puts his finger on his mouth to indicate that you should be quiet. You stand up and start to pack up your clothes from last night and lay out a dress to put on once the portal is there. He throws some clothes in a bag too and then comes up behind you and kisses your neck.

"I believe we have some work to do." You turn to face him and he kisses you deeply, walking you back to the couch again.

This time you have sex in the most married way possible and laugh at how tame it is compared to last night. But you're both satisfied and it works to make a portal, so neither of you complains. You get dressed and pick up your bags as he takes your hand. After a deep breath, you walk through the portal together and find yourselves outside the studio in 2018.

******

To be continued...

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Taglist:

@ccab @elvisfatass @elvisalltheway101 @aliypop @18lkpeters @dkayfixates @rosepresley68 @your-nanas-house @deniseinmn @joshuntildawn13 @lookingforrainbows @60svintage @littlehoneyposts @epthedream69 @that-hotdog @eddiesgirlforever @helen06dreamer @returntopresley @rjmartin11

[placegrenette]

Who are wives of ZaQ and Alem? Like do you know anything about them more than their name? Thank you :)!

Why yes, anon! Admittedly some of this stuff I'm not very well informed on, and I will kick you over to the lovely Sara (@bbcblackjack) for more detailed explanations. But I will also thank you, for giving me the the opportunity to say nice things about Veronika and Zhadra!

So, first up: Veronika Zhangalova and Alem started dating in... I want to say, 2019? I'm not sure. And then very quietly got married in 2021. I don't know her birthday or hometown but I'm pretty certain she, like a lot of Kazakhstanis, is ethnically Russian, and she may only speak Russian and not Kazakh but don't quote me on that. Anyway. She was, and is, a working model (here she is modeling some of Bibotta's clothes, for example) and was working in some kind of management capacity for Juz when she and Alem started dating. I don't know if she has an official position at Ninety One's company, but given how active she is on IG / TikTok, it wouldn't surprise me if she did some kind of social-media content management for them. (It would also not surprise me if she were the one to suggest that the absolutely epic face she pulls at about 3:50 of last year's Aqtobe tour stop video be kept in final edits, and thus preserved for Eaglez' enjoyment forever.)

Also, by the way, the story I have heard is that Veronika is singlehandedly responsible for the Irina Kairatovna / Ninety One bromance, as she was in an IK video and then introduced the two groups to each other. So if you liked "Taboo," you now know who to thank.

If you go through the Veronika tag on @ninetyonekz you'll figure out pretty quickly that she's an unabashed Ninety One fangirl and also very dedicated to promoting herself and Alem as True Love. I do think there's a bit of calculation in this: promoting the two of them as True Love enhances their individual respective brands, to give it the most crudely materialistic spin. But I also think that the calculation is in the social-media posting and not the love itself: that she's genuinely crazy about him and he about her, and they like to hang out together and have shared hobbies. Q-Eaglez apparently gave her some grief when it was first revealed that they were dating (which was, IIRC, an Eaglez asking at a fanmeeting, "There's something going on between you and Veronika, right?" and Alem bashfully replying, "Uh, yeah"), because a lot of Q-Eaglez are immature teenagers, but hopefully that's died down by now and everyone can just enjoy good-hearted people being publicly happy with each other.

Speaking of which:

ZaQ's wife's name is Zhadra Abdulzhapparova, and I honestly know even less about her background than I do Veronika's, although given her name I strongly suspect she's ethnically Kazakh. She may also speak Russian only? I'm not sure. Anyway, she has been Ninety One's primary hair and makeup artist since at least 2017, as she has sole MUA credit for "Su Asty," but she and ZaQ didn't get together right away, I think they didn't become a couple until 2018 or 2019.

(Yeah, Ninety One are apparently kings of office romance, which has worked out beautifully in two cases and still leaves me a little nervous. You can start to understand why Bibotta at one point had to devote a whole series of Instagram Stories to shooting down rumors that she and Ace were an item. Like brother and sister, she said. I'm pretty much hoping that's the case for all the other women working for Ninety One at this point, with regards to Ace and Bala.)

I don't follow Zhadra on IG, so I've missed a lot, but my impression from following the guys is that ZaQ kept things pretty quiet until the split from Juz and then posted this pic with the caption "Wife," in April of last year. Which of course set off some speculation, which turned out to be unnecessary, because in July THEY GOT MARRIED and it was WONDERFUL, Boss Yerbolat gave a toast and sweet Nurs Bazarbay danced all night and Bala did the Macarena and everybody Instastoried the heck out of the event and I just had a big smile on my face all morning watching the live updates roll in. And now that they're married, ZaQ makes no secret of finding his wife super cute. I think Zhadra's less outgoing on social media than Veronika (and generally less interested in being a celebrity in her own right), but they did do one professional photoshoot together, from which the above photo was taken.

(Also see here for a ramble on my part on why it's particularly adorable that ZaQ, of all the members, married the group's makeup artist.)

Also the cats are originally Zhadra's, which is why you may now refer to ZaQ as Cute Cat Stepdaddy. Their names are Flerken and Vivian and I don't know which is which.

One thing I've noticed (and I've referred to this before) is that ZaQ & Zhadra + Alem & Veronika seem to work well together; last year they traveled as a foursome to the UAE to see 50 Cent perform, for example. Which is a good thing, if I'm right. I also think that the natural outgrowth of ZaQ and Alem spending more time with their wives is that Ace and Bala have been bro-ing around with each other more than either of them have with the other two (hence Space Season 4 Episode 4, 75% of the footage of which is Bala beating up his hyungs and Ace videotaping it). I mention this to shoot down the hasty conclusion that Zhadra and Veronika, separately or together, might be sowing dissension within the group; I think the individual friendships between the members can (and should) change over time, as they age and grow and confront new challenges, but "change" doesn't equal "become worse." I prefer to hope that everyone gets along with everyone else and Zhadra and Veronika are universally valued parts of the whole Ninety One enterprise.

Finally, anon, I have not the slightest wisp of a clue who Ace or Bala (or AZ) might be dating. If you hear anything credible, feel free to report back!

[yuki-hitomi-chan]

what anime do you like and what art do you do. I will tell you mine when you tell me yours :)

There's a few anime's that I like, and honestly I haven't posted art since...2016???2017??? mostly halted until my brain finally figures out how clothing folds work, because people keep trying to teach me and my brain says no. I'll get back into it eventually. (when I'm not writing)

Lets see, for anime

SpyxFamily, InuYasha, Naruto, Fruits Basket, Yu Yu Hakusho, Free, Yuri on Ice, Zombieland saga, Love Live (only seen the first series) Fullmetal Alchemist (both series), Devil is a part timer, and Hetalia.

There's more but that's all I can think of off the top of my head. Most of these I watched Subbed only, but a few I enjoy the dub for.

Also, my dms are open if you want to chat more!

[badlydrawnmanic]

How many Sonic fursuits do you have, and can you show them all in one post?

oh boy, this’ll take a sec

answer under the cut

this is antoine (at least it’s supposed to be), the first one me and my mom ever made. iirc we took one of those stuffed maskimal costume heads (i think it was a rabbit) and used it to build him. we didn’t have time to make the hair look decent so it’s all just flat. his cheek fluff is kinda fucked too. regardless of that, we tried our best. he was made in 2017 and i’m considering redoing the head as a personal project. the body suit is fine, but… those eyes…

[shivers]

god, those eyes…

the shoes were just cloth covers for my normal size shoes so they don’t look fantastic. might redo those too. besides, (modern) antoine has boots.

edit before i even post this: i found the pic of the poor rabbit head we destroyed and me looking slightly derranged

you all know the manic one, it’s probably the one i talk most about. this was the first decent one, made only a year later in 2018. I think the pre-bought head we skinned for this one was a llama. we couldn’t figure out how to make the head turn with my head so we glued a whole ass bicycle helmet in there which works pretty well actually. if i could redo anything for this costume it’d be the shoes (we built them off of slippers and it is not fun walking several blocks in soggy michigan weather with no arch support like that). maybe i’d tweak the tail and back spines because they’re flat. other than that, i’m still very content with this one!

fun thing about this one: the hair kept getting snagged on low hanging tree branches and decorations. also i tripped up a lot of stairs. that wasn’t actually fun lmao

finally there’s macaron, the mascot for a sonic server i help moderate. this is the first suit where we made the head from scratch instead of buying something to base it off of, as well as the first one whose body fur just consisted of pants (since the top half is covered by sweater). it was made in 2021. this one also had a bike helmet in it but it came loose (shitty glue) so we took it out. we simply reused the shoes from manic for this one since they’re so similar. surprisingly they have fleece in the old discord blue (wedgewood, apparently). we were gonna make three fingered gloves but we ran out of time, but that’s fine. the head is cool and i love it a lot! i gotta sew the tail back on the pants though, it came loose during the last convention i went to.

[trans-advice]

(sorry this is so long) i’m not sure where to go from here. i’m 25 years old. i’ve been trying to figure out my gender identity for several years now. this all started when i tried binding on a whim (i’m afab) and felt so euphoric, idk how to even describe it in words. from 2017-early 2020 i thought for sure that i was a trans man. i was out online with a different name & he/him pronouns, i wore a binder everyday, i dressed in a masculine way, etc. eventually, i was even able to express the feminine parts of my personality without feeling invalid. there were stretches of time, especially early on, when i’d back out mentally & re-enter the closet & try to live as a woman. but eventually it settled, and for the entirety of 2019 i was fully determined to transition medically & come out to everyone once i was able to move out of my mormon parents’ house. but then i suffered through a sudden major personal tragedy in late 2019, followed by the pandemic in 2020, and basically i dropped the entire trans dream between those two events, in probably like february 2020. i developed agoraphobia as well. on top of all of that, i’m autistic, so all this change has been really hard on my brain. since then, i’ve been on this rollercoaster where for a few weeks i’ll try to live happily as a woman, then cave and live as a man, and so on and so forth. it’s driving me nuts. i finally confided in my therapist about my gender stuff, because it’s really affecting my agoraphobia recovery progress, and she officially diagnosed me with gender dysphoria. she firmly believes i need to accept myself, whoever that is, but i don’t know how. there are real moments when i’m ok being a woman. it can be fun to shop for pretty clothes (though they’re usually stuffed to the back of my closet immediately) & have girl talk with my younger sisters. and it’s hard to imagine myself as an old man. but it’s also hard to imagine myself as a mom rather than a dad. i don’t know. maybe i’m so scared my religious conservative family will abandon me if i transition? and maybe the loss i experienced a couple years ago was so awful i’m scared for it to happen again? or what if i’m not trans but just some sort of androgynous woman with internalized misogyny. help?

I'm not sure about how agoraphobia works. Readers if you have any feedback on agoraphobia please share it!

Yeah, I think it's more like you need a better support network that will accept you if you transition into being a man. Like I think you need to have some preparation for abandonment by your religious conservative family.

Even worse, I would be worried about them giving conversion torture under the labels of "conversion therapy" & "religious apologetics". So in case you're facing that, I'd seek out some pro-lgbtqia+ religious apologetics, not necessarily to deprogram them, but to help fight the gaslighting that comes with anti-lgbtqia+.

You already said that you were very okay with being an androgynous man, so I don't think it's a matter of you somehow being an androgynous woman with self-hatred.

Since we live in a patriarchal misogynist/transmisogynist/transandrophobic society, I would look into trans-affirming feminist information so that you can get a better grip on what misogyny is when people try to gas light you like that.)

As for the enjoying the girl talk, are you sure that's not just enjoying talking with others? Also defining "girliness" can vary from group to group, so I would make sure to look into how that's being defined.

Have you applied for health insurance like Medicaid or Obamacare (affordable care act)? Because you're getting to age 26, so you're going to need your own insurance most likely. Like that would help with preparing to be either abandoned or more independent of your parents.

I'm not sure how much of my transition strategies will apply to your situation & what's available by you. I know in my transition before the pandemic, I basically relied on getting my things organized with a therapist at a therapy office in person because I was not safe from domestic violence when I would talk about my gender issues on the phone. Like I would have to go outside & walk around & find free of charge spaces in order to avoid the people I lived with as much as possible. I had to get a public transit pass in order to get to places without having to be at the mercy of people to drive me.

Good Luck, Peace & Love,

Eve

[authorofthelabyrinth]

Decided to redesign my “Cool Kid Firi” drawing from 2017. I feel like I’ve gotten a better understanding of anatomy and movement over the past year, as well as a more Americanized art style.

[bciwasinlove]

Hey what are your thoughts to the 2 years reference in Louis and Harry's songs? Too young - "it's been two years since I have seen your face" and Hunger - " as one year turns into two I am still not over you" surely this can't be a coincidence. But the question that arises do you think they were on a time out or a break for 2 years?

Hi anon had a feeling someone would come mentioning those lines. It's all anyone has to grasp at for proof of a break up. I'm pretty sure I've explaining this before to many others but I'll explain again bc the app sucks making it hard to find any old posts.

The way harry has what we refer to as "stunt songs" or just songs where he added something to the song to allude to one of his fake gfs like the fake VM from camille in cherry well louis does the same except for him he just does a few "stunt lines" here and there so people don't realize who the songs are actually for.

In WMI there's the uni line "Meet you at your uni [...] share a single bed and tell each other what we dream about." This alludes to the song being about eleanor and their time spent together when she was at Manchester Uni [allegedly.] I do think originally the message was about L&H nights spent sharing a bed at the xfactor house and they just changed it to uni so people go 🌟 eleanor 🌟. We know thxs to the 2017 leak song snippet that louis did change lyrics so this is most likely one of them.

The line you mentioned "two years since I've see your face" from to young is a similar deal of a lyric change to allude to eleanor. My main theory is the song lyric was originally "two weeks since I've seen your face" which would line up with harry's "two weeks and I'll be home" from CM alluding to the two week theory that basically is they never went more than two weeks without seeing eachother. It would seem for at least 7 years they managed that but as harry started doing acting and louis started doing solo touring it's been harder to do so.

They probably changed two weeks to two years bc E&L had broken up for a year and some change. Yes two years is technically more but when have they ever been accurate/consistent when it came to eleanor relationship timeline? They have never even been able to keep it to one straight story on how they met or their anniversary it's pathetic.

It also logically doesn't make sense [taking the offical line at face value] that they didn't see each other for two whole years. From 2010 to 2015 they were in 1D together seeing eachother literally everyday for 7+ months. In 2016 there are pictures of L&H both at the xfactor when louis was there performing with steve plus the harry pick of him headed into the hospital and without going into sad details we can figure out why he was there.

I do personally get so upset when people bring up 2016 as "break up proof" knowing what was happening then and why L&H would have looked upset/sad then. Anyways in 2017 we had Jamaica larry with louis being pictured in Jamaica while harry is there working on HS1 [and right before the louis pics we had receipts of louis being seen on the beach with mitch it was humm but once pics came out placing louis in Jamaica it became 😳]

Plus once HS1 tour started later that year louis many times was spotted out in random cities he had no reason being at and the only thing going within the next coming days was a HS1 concert. And naturally those louis spottings were the HS1 concerts where harry was lovingly singing up to a mysterious person in the VIP box. I could go on like the sharing of vintage clothes during quarantine and HS3 being very I STILL FUCKIN LOVE YOU BABE with a very I've been commited since I was 16 vibe BUT you get the point.

Moving on to just the concept/notion of them even being able to stay away from eachother that long makes no sense. In late night talking one of the lines goes "it's only been a couple days and I miss you" and when I heard it it reminded me of those late 1D receipts of harry when going out to clubs with nick and other friends [nights when louis didn't join them] he would just get drunk and be needy complaining about missing his baby.

And of course when it came to prime 1D larry louis after seeing harry everyday for 7+ months straight and FINALLY getting to go home and see his family asked if they could invite harry's family over for the holidays bc he would miss harry. I think both have made it plenty clear they can BARELY handle a week or two apart and some think they would not see eachother for TWO YEARS. The times they did have an argument of some kind I assume one would jet off to another city stay for a couple days and than come crawling back home bc they missed their baby. Harry does seem like the dramatic type who would write a song about something like "oh I jetted off to LA for the week and couldn't handle my baby not around me."

Now as for the Hunger song lyric "as one year turns into two I'm still not over you." Side not fuckin love this song it's beautiful and I'm mad it wasn't on an album. ANYWAYS this song is kind of tricky bc it's just a leaked 1D demo harry sang so we don't technically know when it was written or by who. I DO think it was a four demo and most likely harry DID write it based on how harry's voice sounds, the emotion harry carries when singing it and the genre of the song.

I will continue my thoughts based on the notion he wrote it and it's about larry. So to me as always they were put in a shitty situation as a closeted gay couple in a MI that thinks that wouldn't sell or make them a popular artist. With Louis song WMI he talks about their younger selves and how if only their younger selves could see their older selves and how they made it and YES they are STILL madly in love louis is STILL the love of harry's life regarless of what outside people have to say about them being in love. Well I see hunger in the same light. Young harry was so insecure when it came to many things most likely one was about how he was in love with louis and "certain people" didn't agree with it.

The one year... than two... is older harry reminising on the past. Like shit we were just two young teenagers falling in love and in the blink of an eye one year passed and than two where has the time gone? And even though many years have passed since those days in the xfactor house "he [harry] is still not over you [louis]" he is still the love of his life as he always has been nothing anyone tells him will ever change that.

My biggest deal when it comes to "they broke up" is it's usually people who don't understand a thing about long term relationships and ended up making larry into something toxic where they were constantly breaking up and dating other people. Larry has made it clear that's not who they are. Did larry have issues ABSOLUTELY especially given the situation they have been put into but larry has made it very fuckin clear they didn't just pack up and leave behind the best person they ever knew.

And they certainly didn't allow those assholes who told them they wouldn't last and shouldn't even be a thing to end up being right. Louis WMI DC MV, almost all harry FL MVs show how hard they fought to make it work and escape the glum of being around those assholes and into the sunlight their SO provided.

I just don't see how would just walks away from the person they always called home and got many matching/romantic tattoos together. The tattoos will ALWAYS be the biggest deal to me bc most don't even get one matching/romantic tattoo with their SO so for larry to get as many as they did. You just don't get that many tattoos with someone unless you know without a shadow of doubt this is the one I will be with till my last breath. Point blank I don't think they officially broke up [certainly not two years] and nothing will ever change my mind on that.

[sockgate]

what makes you think they’re not baiting us?

well.... they've been shady for awhile since their return and the louis re-release. i will do a throughout recap for you anon: 

if you need background on louis connection and past campaign with polari i recommend these posts

- prior to this year, polari had been inactive on instagram and did not sell clothing since 2019.

- polari returned nov 9 with a 2022 clothing line. they immediately began teasing a re-release of louis’ 2017 campaign. they also changed their pfp to the ferricadooza art

- on nov 12, the day of the louis launch, the acc posted these messages. the first message has been deleted, the second one is still up

many things to note about these!!! letters missing due to misspelling, capitalized letters, language reminiscent of dykwya, they are also screenshots of a word processor on a computer (i cant figure it out which one), Look into Polari *harry voice* “we’re all trying!!!!!!”

i also think the writing of these is very interesting which is making me think they’re coded. i tried the polari dictionary, looking into polari writing methods (like letter writing), and even cyphers and cryptography but haven’t found anything :/ tl;dr i have no clue how to decode these past their literal meanings

- after the louis re-release (nov 12) the colour of their pfp had changed about every 24 hours to a different colour used in their 2022 line. this included: peach, yellow and lavender. they skipped green. there is speculation the pfp change was every 28 hours, which is also possible as each colour was up for more than a calendar day

- on nov 13, this was commented under their most recent photo x

- the acc then posted cyan / turquoise, to their feed. it was quickly deleted. what colour is this??? blue or green??

- polari started their non-binary campaign on nov 13. they also added they/them pronouns to their bio. and another message was posted (now deleted)

- since the release of their non-binary line, louis campaign shirt and sweater are back on their website for sale. those items had been previously removed from sale on nov 13.

- harry has also been posted on the acc a few times (on both their feed and story) since they started their non-binary campaign!!!

other important things to note:

- before they unfollowed to zero, polari followed both louis and harry

- the quality of the pictures they post are TERRIBLE. i have no clue why they would post such low quality pics, especially ones that belong to their own campaigns. they’re so bad they’re joking about it in the comments and captions of their pics lol

my thoughts: no anon, i dont think they’re baiting us. personally, i think this is a lead up to louis is doing another campaign with them, considering they continue to post pics of him (and now harry) on their feed. polari was an insane thing louis was able to pull off at a very interesting time in his career, and considering its history, i think it was a very important project for him. i don’t think they are simply using us or louis for clout, considering all these posts are making the brand look utterly insane to most people. cryptic messaging does not draw people in, it draws US in. we know what to look for and if its worth sticking around. considering the amount of work put into all this, and that its continued for almost a month, whoever is running this acc must be very familiar with louis fanbase.

[useless-englandfacts]

Hey! Love your blog and completely agree with everything you're posting about Jamie Oliver, but so tired of seeing people equate Marcus Rashford - who has campaigned tirelessly for a cause near & dear to his heart - in the same category as Jack Monroe - who seems to think constantly tweeting triggering content with no warnings is good activism, and is often displaying a thinly veiled disdain for the very people they are supposed to be helping.

Hopefully I'll be proven wrong when the Vines Boots Index finally releases. We were originally promised that would be finished in like Feb/March though and haven't heard anything since, so I'm not holding out much hope.

I understand she's said herself in the past that she comes from a middle class background and her message was that poverty can affect literally anyone, but I'm sorry I see blatant snobbery peeking out sometimes, in the way she talks about the foster kids she grew up with, or the way she describes working class people sometimes - like in this article https://www.theguardian.com/society/patrick-butler-cuts-blog/2013/jun/06/food-poverty-jack-monroe-it-could-happen-to-anyone

"You have no idea whether the young woman with a black baby and a lanky blond nine year old on her arm is a foster carer or a 'slut' " - Jack Monroe in the Guardian. https://www.theguardian.com/society/2013/sep/18/jack-monroe-starve-benefits-england

This was their rebuttal to "whispers and stares" when taking her parents' foster kids out. So if hypothetically those kids were that young woman's then that's a bad thing ?! The article is well intentioned and i agree with its message but slips like this and implying that people in poverty aren't "normal people" in the first article which show how she truly thinks about us tbh.

I'll never forgive Jack for publicly bashing Corbyn several times in 2017-19, a man who would have put in place so many of the policies that Jack claimed to support. They were even planning to run as MP against labour in 2017 in Southend until they stepped down due to receiving an anonymous letter threatening them https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/politics/food-blogger-jack-monroe-announces-10317018

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2017/may/11/jack-monroe-abandons-bid-to-become-an-mp

Only once Corbyn had been replaced and had no chance of being Prime Minister did Jack change their tune.

I also wish the people recommending her website would give some of Jack's recipes a try first, they're mostly terrible, and make the infuriating decision to 'cost' by the amounts used, as if anyone is going to be able to find 4 pence worth of black pepper somewhere

Despite the good I can agree they've done with raising funds for the trussel trust, both times she's done a major fundraiser for them have also helped raise her own profile - the time she gave books they weren't donated directly by her to food banks, members of the public had to pay for 2 copies and one would be a "donation" which coincidentally helped inflate her books' sales figures. Her recent fundraiser involved purchasing t shirts with her name printed on them next to the slogans to again raise her profile - and we have no way of knowing that all of the profits are being donated as promised.

Just because someone shares our politics doesn't necessarily mean they're automatically a great person. Some will definitely co opt our movement for their own personal gain.

As someone who's been on Tumblr a long time I remember Zubat and the Leelah Project, I remember people on Twitter finally clueing up to Rachel Swindon, hell I even remember the HIV Hamilton mermaid fanfiction girl being outed. I honestly think Jack Monroe is someone in the same vein.

Sorry this is so long but I've seen Jack being paraded around Tumblr lately as if she's actually doing anything to help, people even giving them credit for being involved in Marcus' campaigning, and that's just not true. I feel like I'm challenging the Emperor's New clothes here.

Maybe I'm just overly mistrustful, but I'm just seeing a lot of red flags and I would recommend people donate directly to Trussell Trust rather than send the money to this person.

Having said all the above I do agree with the content of most of Jack's articles and tweets (even if I think they're in it mostly for the money) and I hope they absolutely destroy Lee Anderson in court.

(Jack uses they/she pronouns and I've included a mix of both in this post, sorry if its confusingly worded anywhere )

hi! thank you so much for sending this! there are some really great points worth pulling out of this. i always think it's good to treat any public figure with a healthy dose of scepticism. going to put this under a cut because it's long!

i'll preface this by saying that i don't follow jack monroe on twitter, nor to i keep a really close eye on everything they do - they're just someone who will pop up on my feed every now and then as a recommended tweet/because my mututals have liked one of her tweets, or i'll see them in the news/some panel show every once in a while. i also currently work for the trussell trust.

firstly yes, after reading those articles i totally agree with you that the classism is LEAPING out of this one. "I had a £27 grand a year job. I've not been brought up on benefits and a tracksuit watching Jeremy Kyle. I'm a middle class, well educated young woman who fell a bit by the way side. You think it doesn't happen to normal people, and you think we are all scumbags, eating burgers and watching day time TV. It can happen to anyone."

i understand that their point here is to dispel commonly-held perceptions about working/lower-class people, but even if someone was eating burgers and watching daytime TV, doesn't mean they're any less deserving of food lol. that whole article was clearly designed to appeal to the middle and upper classes (i.e. guardian readers), rather than building any sort of sympathy and solidarity for the working class, you're right.

though, perhaps in fairness i should say that those articles are from 2013 so... very very early on in the public side of her career, and she was only 25 years old so i don't think it's totally fair to expect every single thing that they said to tick every single "100% perfect and virtuous morality" box we have if that makes sense? i don't know how much conscious unlearning has taken place since then though, so i'm willing to be corrected here again.

her standing in the general election gives me huge jess phillips vibes - that whole empty "speaking truth to power" thing... though it is her right to stand if she wants to like i'm not going to pretend that the labour party is perfect, or that jeremy corbyn was perfect because (though i agreed with him on many many many things and i voted for him) he wasn't.

a minor point but i am poor and i use jack monroe's recipes and i don't have an issue with them lmao i think that's just a subjective thing that depends on what sort of cook you are tbh so i'm going to leave that

also agree with your point about her self promo - for example i really wasn't a fan of the t shirts (?) they recently sold to raise money for us at the trussell trust but also like... it did still raise the money, and if a silly t shirt is what it takes to tempt the public into donating money for foodbanks then that's something i'm sort of willing to overlook? like not to be machiavelli on main but sometimes the ends do actually justify the means.like.

more generally i think far too often on tumblr/twitter/the internet in general, people throw out the baby with the bathwater and are obsessed with seeing things in black and white. like. we are not immanuel kant and we are capable of viewing people with compassion and nuance and it doesn't have to be a "this person is EVIL you should totally ignore every single thing that they do" or a "this person is a SAINT you should totally agree with every single thing they do".

and like you said: on the whole you agree with most of their tweets/articles, so i don't think it's worth completely disparaging her. that being said, yes i also don't think it's worth completely venerating her either. you just have to trust that people aren't unintelligent and can make informed decisions of their own.

i know you said that we shouldn't compare them but one day marcus rashford (who is only 24!) will probably say something or do something ~problematic at some point in the future, but in my mind - and within reason - i don't think that automatically unpicks or undermines every single good thing a person has done.

i think a lot of this is a case of someone getting a national platform they weren't expecting, and then not being able to handle it well. like she doesn't deal well with any sort of backlash, and their actions perhaps aren't thought-through because she's literally just some person who wasn't trained or prepared for this. maybe they should hire some sort of PR team now though, if they haven't already...

[cassanovancats]

felicitate. nine.

eight < current > ten

Dec. 24, 2017

You make yourself comfortable on the rooftop, debating if you should go ahead and text your brother. He would be almost as disappointed as you were; Satoru had taken to calling himself the captain of your ship with Yuta and Toge, even coming up with a nickname that incorporated shortened versions of all three names. You sigh, deciding it’s probably best to not text him. He’s likely already worried about leaving you in charge, no need to add a worry about something that isn’t deadly.

A sudden yell disrupts your thoughts and you jump into position, nocking an arrow and aiming towards the scream. You hitch your breath at the sight: Geto is striding into your school alone, leaving a trail of headless assistants behind him. One of the bodies is familiar and you recognize her as the assistant that gave you chocolate with a bright smile after a mission with unfortunate timing left you covered in curse blood and your own. She didn't flinch or offer pity - just a single chocolate kiss. Now she is covered in gore and blood, her previously pristine white shirt coated with her own brain matter.

You feel your resolve hardens. Geto is a curse-user, a human at his core, but he also is a monster. The arrow flies an accurate course but the man dodges, leaving it to embed itself into the wall instead of his torso. He turns to your rooftop, calling out, “Ah, (y/n)! And here I thought your brother would lock you in a tower.” Geto unleashes a grade-one curse that looks similar to a wolf and sends it after you. He is infuriatingly unbothered by your presence and continues his steady gait into the school grounds.

You start running across the rooftops, jumping over gaps and dodging the curse’s attempts to bite you. The rooftop tiles bite into your hands and knees. It faintly registers that a nail broke when you almost missed a jump, narrowly avoiding falling to the ground.

Satoru didn’t say how long to keep this secret, but you assume now is a good time to give Maki and Yuta a heads-up. You spot Maki stepping away from a classroom, so you run there, drawing the curse after you. On the roof next to where she stands, you plant your feet and turn, suddenly drawing your katana and slicing at the wolf. It draws back, avoiding your attack before lunging suddenly. Its claws sink into your leg. You cry out in pain, falling to your knees. When the curse lunges again, this time aiming for your throat, you fall on your back and thrust your blade into its stomach. You force the blade down its body with a grunt, disemboweling the creature. The teeth around your throat loosen, but the dead weight of the curse dropping on you prevents you from getting up immediately. Guts slide out and onto you and you suppress a gag. You feel a lot like Carrie on prom night.

When you finally stagger to your feet, you see Maki has engaged Geto in a fight that she’s obviously losing. You cry her name and rush to her side. She doesn’t get a chance to acknowledge you as Geto, in one fluid moment, breaks her weapon and sends her flying. She falls to the ground as a ragdoll, bleeding heavily from her side and head. You watch her body land, horrified, before you’re snapped back into the fight rudely.

Geto is now the closest to you he’s been since you were a child, frightened and unable to communicate with the people around you. He feels some long-forgotten sense of pity as he slides the blade of his knife further into your stomach. “W-wh-?” You look at the handle sticking out of your body curiously, blood starting to leak from the corner of your mouth. The pain hasn’t begun to register but your body understands that you are unable to fight. You faint, missing the entrance of Panda and Toge by a few precious seconds.

When Yuta comes out from the classroom, he isn’t sure what he’s expecting to find. He felt a few earthquakes and thought it best to find you and Maki to wait out any aftershocks together. Yuta was sure it was to be a little awkward after his rejection, but also wanted to be sure you were okay. He didn’t expect to find you covered in blood, the same cute gym clothing you were wearing that morning when he rejected you ruined. A quick glance around and he sees the rest of his classmates, his friends, in similar form. Inumaki is clinging to consciousness.

Geto, the one who grabbed Yuta months earlier, stands surrounded by the bodies, hardly winded. “I truly wanted you to live, Okkotsu, but this is for the future of jujutsu.” Yuta wonders how he can fight this man. How can he protect his friends, the only ones to give him a chance since Rika, when Geto already destroyed the strongest people he knew. He was so, so weak compared to each of them.

Inumaki desperately calls a slurred version of his name and says, “Run away.” The fact that the command does nothing, that Yuta feels nothing, breaks him from his spiral. He summons Rika in a rage.

“I am going to kill you!” He declares. Yuta doesn’t think he has ever felt such anger and despair, the feeling of watching Rika die now multiplied by four.

Geto simply says, “You are going to die.”

-

A sudden pull on your stomach wakes you harshly. “Shit!” Your eyes snap open, to see a sheepish Panda holding the knife that was previously in your stomach. You automatically go to apply pressure on the wound but your hands find Maki’s already there, dressing the wound. “What happened?”

“The fight’s over, but we need to find Yuta,” Maki explains. “He must have healed all of us, but you still had the blade in you. It needed to be removed before you get up. All of us are going to be fine, (y/n), you can rest now.” She helps you to your feet and you cringe looking at your ruined outfit. Maki catches your pout and smiles, glad some things never change.

Toge comes to your side to take Maki’s place as your crutch. You hug him tightly, unable to express in words how relieved you are. He hugs back, equally overwhelmed after seeing what seemed like your corpse. Toge helps you limp along as you all start tracking Yuta’s residuals. Panda clears his throat and asks, “When did this happen?”

“Only a few days ago. Don’t act like you didn’t see this coming,” you explain with an eye-roll.

“No, I totally did. Just curious who won the bet.”

“If we didn’t just fight for our lives, I would kill you.” You four continue to try to have a light conversation until you come upon Yuta’s unconscious body. Toge helps you sit on the ground and you move his head onto your lap, muttering about checking for a concussion. All of you needed medical attention but you were desperate to help any way you could now.

Yuta begins to blink his eyes open and sits up urgently. “Your wounds… Panda! Your arm!” He seems to be working himself into a frenzy. You place a comforting hand on his shoulder as Panda explains that everyone will be okay. Yuta urgently looks over you, trying to determine how much blood was yours, before he seems satisfied.

“Thank you for saving us,” You whisper. His eyes fill with tears and you wonder how scared he must have been. You maintain eye contact, hoping to communicate how much you admire him, before Rika’s jumbled voice makes the both of you jump. Yuta stands, leaving the circle your class formed around him.

“Sorry to keep you waiting, Rika,” he says, approaching her.

“What’s wrong?” Maki asks, a little fearful at how resigned Yuta looks.

Yuta hums a little before answering, “In exchange for her power, I promised to go with her.”

“What?” You screech and the suddenness of the yell pains your wound. Your classmates join a chorus of disagreement. Panda and Inumaki both grab fistfuls of his shirt to prevent him from walking any closer to Rika. Instead of her usual retaliation for someone restraining Yuta, her form just falls away to reveal a young girl. Four of you are confused but Yuta just mumbles, “Rika?”

A clapping distracts from the drama. You turn as best you can with a hole in your stomach to see your brother without any eye wear approaching your group. “Congrats. You broke the curse,” he continues to clap and stands next to you.

“Who’re you?” Yuta and Maki ask, causing you to snort before you groan at the pain.

Your brother pouts before replying, “Everyone’s favorite good-looking Gojo-sensei. Do you not see the sibling resemblance?” He gestures between your face and his, before carefully putting you on his back. He doesn’t even flinch at the grime covering you transferring onto him as well, relieved to see you awake and alert. You rest your chin on his shoulder and listen to him explain.

“I thought Yuta was interesting, so I looked into his lineage. Apparently, you’re a descendant of Michizane Sugawara. So, super-distant, but we’re relatives!” You groan and hide your face in Satoru’s neck; the teasing to come will be unbearable.

Your classmates look dumbfounded at the information while Yuta just goes, “Who?”

“One of Japan’s big three vengeful spirits.”

“A big-shot sorcerer.”

“Tuna.”

“The annoying side of the family,” you add.

Your brother takes back control of the conversation. “Yuta, you’re right. Rika isn’t cursing you, you cursed her. When the curser severs the bond tying servant to master and the cursed doesn’t desire punishment, the curse is broken. Though it seems you figured that out by yourself.” He gestures at the little girl and Yuta.

“Oh my god,” Yuta collapses in tears. “It’s all my fault…. Hurting so many people, Geto coming after me, it’s all my - all my -” He begins to hyperventilate. Inumaki takes a step to comfort him, but before he can, Rika approaches and hugs his trembling form.

“Thank you, Yuta. For giving me time and letting me be by your side. I’ve been happier these past six years than I ever was alive. Good-bye, be well. And don’t come over too soon, ‘kay?” She gives a bright smile, toothy and pure as she dissolves into bright ashes. Yuta stares at where she stood, long after all the ashes disappeared and everyone else walked away.

“See you,” He says to himself, before getting up to follow his friends to Doctor Ieiri.

[mysterious-dark-shadow]

@da-at-ass is dead, long live @grimoire-of-geekery

I am normally a very private person. I believe I have said this several times on this blog by this point. I don’t like airing out dirty laundry for the court of public opinion to scrutinize. But this time, I need your help. Felix S Warren needs your help. You may have known him as @da-at-ass or @badoccultadvice or @felixswarren , but no longer. His blogs are gone. Years and years of writing from a published occult author, as well as many, many drawings from an accomplished artist & spirit worker, all gone. Without warning, and with no way to know how or why for sure (unless @staff actually responds to Felix’s inquiry).

So, all I’m left with is retrospection and divination. And both lead me to one source: Rune S Emerson, aka @grimoire-of-geekery, @thequeensword , and whatever side blogs he’s running now under the guise of RP and/or spirit work. Now, I will admit that I have a lot of personal enmity for Rune, and emotional appeals only work to convince someone to do something in the short term, but never leads to long term change. So, I will attempt to set my personal feelings aside, and share the facts that I have gathered over the 7 years that I have known Felix and the 5 I had known Rune, as well as my personal insights as a victim of relationship abuse, as documented in many, many posts on my blog.

I would also like to request that those who are reading this who are not Rune reserve judgment, as much as possible. He should have a chance at rebuttal. I would be very interested to read what he has to say, and since I am blocked by him, I cannot tag him directly. I, and Felix, have made posts in the past about his behavior, and his friends have jumped to his defense before he responded to anything, and I think he should have an opportunity to defend himself.

(Apologies in advance for the length of this post. I am on mobile, and have never been able to figure out how to add a “read more” on this app)

A bit of history to start:

I moved to Portland, Oregon in October of 2014. Alone, with one suitcase and my cat, to move in with a person that I had only met over the internet. I was desperate to leave my abusive husband, so I jumped at the opportunity to leave the East Coast behind and travel to the West Coast, where I’ve dreamed about living since I was a child. Unfortunately, he turned out to be an abusive person as well (which I have written about extensively), but the one bright spot in that horrible situation was meeting Felix, first online in December of 2014, and then after almost a year of missed connections, finally in person in October of 2015.

Felix was the kindest person I had ever met by that point, and throughout our friendship (and eventual relationship), he has never lost that distinction. He was also (as I would find out later) a rather well known occult blogger on tumblr. As someone who practiced magic in secret for many, many years, I was thrilled to finally have someone who I could talk with openly about magic, gods, spirits, and so many other aspects of the occult. And then when he told me he was going to introduce me to Rune Emerson, witch and tarot reader (and Felix’s boyfriend), while he was in town for NEWTS 2017, I was ecstatic.

I wore the best clothes I had, hand washing them in the sink so I wouldn’t have to ask my “boyfriend” for money for the laundry. I wore an oversized windbreaker that was gifted to me by a coworker, as it was March and very rainy and cold. I took public transit as far as I could go, and then walked over half a mile to the Monarch Hotel & Convention Center. And the first impression I got was Rune laughing with someone over my “potato sack” of a jacket, while Felix was nowhere to be found. I found out later that he had a massive migraine that whole day, but toughed it out in order to hang out once the sun went down.

I cannot recount how many times Rune belittled me during that day. From telling me I could sneak into a class because “no one will notice someone like you”, to ostentatiously kissing Felix in front of me when I was obviously uncomfortable with casual PDA, to showing off the expensive gifts Felix bought him while smirking at my empty hands and pockets, it seemed like he wanted to make sure that no one remembered me in a favorable light. Unfortunately, I wasn’t really able to talk about my experience with Rune to Felix directly, because my “boyfriend” decided to threaten suicide because I was late getting home and the closest store to us was closed. And that’s just one incident, out of many, where “happenstance” ensured my silence regarding Rune’s behavior. My personal embarrassment of my unfortunate circumstances; another, much more urgent matter; or even just physical or emotional fatigue.

And I can only conclude by this point that Rune has woven magic around himself to ensure it remain so. The more that Felix and I have talked about Rune’s past & present behavior, the worse our personal circumstances have gotten. Aside from Felix’s blog being gone, we have both had to quit our jobs (Felix permanently) and I have been unable to secure another, our mortgage is under review for foreclosure, our house had a sewage leak so bad there was liquid human waste coming out of the drains of the bathtubs, and we are having to rely on the generosity of friends & family to feed ourselves and our 3 cats. Anytime we have tried to start something that had the faintest chance of bringing in funds, we would run into problem after problem. All this happened within the last 2 years, ever since we said “I do” to each other, without Rune’s prior blessing and without his participation.

I am forced to conclude that Rune has cursed our marriage. And, since Felix & I both work with time magic, Rune has managed to insure he was the origin point of many, if not all, of the issues throughout our entire relationship. I was going to ask Felix if he was interested in dating me after his King’s Ride in 2015, but Rune “happened” to meet him in mid November and took away my chance. I was planning on talking with Felix about my feelings for him in September of 2018, but Rune pushed me to admit my feelings about Felix to him first while staging a “private intervention” regarding my abusive boyfriend. Any time I tried to do something romantic or heartfelt for Felix, Rune had either preemptively ruined it because I tried to involve him, or complained about it afterwards when I excluded him. I was hoping to kiss Felix on New Years of 2019, but Rune wanted us to celebrate New Years with him on Second Life, because his 3 husbands (who live in the same house as him, btw) were “not feeling it.”

On top of all my personal experience with Rune, I have also read through all the messages still accessible that were sent back and forth between him and Felix throughout their relationship, with Felix’s blessing. I have also received screenshots from his Patreon discord, where he has minimized my involvement in setting up and managing his discord, as well as making wildly inaccurate claims regarding Felix’s mental health and intentions towards him. I am not providing screenshots of private conversations without Felix’s express permission, and I refuse to discuss in detail most of what was said between them right now. I will say this: as a survivor of internet grooming & gaslighting by a “romantic” interest, I saw many reflections in my past experiences and the messages I was reading early on in Felix & Rune’s online conversations.

Based on my personal history with him, the conversations I’ve read between him and Felix from the start of their relationship in 2015 until Rune broke it off in 2020, and the way he and his “friend group” responded to our posts outlining some of his past behavior, I am forced to conclude that Rune is a master social manipulator and serial abuser, though his strengths lie in connections made or strengthened in person; and, to a lesser extent, one-on-one personal connections via the internet. He is a serial “regifter”, taking expensive presents given with good will, and either giving it to another when he thinks no one will notice, or demanding to know the price so he can give something of equal value. I watched as years of handcrafted gifts imbued with my personal form of helpful magic were intentionally misused or slowly disappeared from his “horde”. And every time I asked about one that had “gone missing”, I received rambling stories of someone who needed it more, or a sudden and deliberate change of conversation.

He demands that his friends pay for his Patreon lessons, then for his witchcraft classes, and his divination readings, and everything leads back to giving him more money, or gifts, or favors, or “hearts”. And if you are not paying enough, or gifting enough, he will harass you until you do. I have sent him at least $50 worth of Linden (Second Life’s currency) during the time I was with my physically, emotionally, and financially abusive ex-boyfriend; paid between $22-30 a month for his Patreon lessons for over a year and a half; made countless things with my own two hands when I did not have the money to give him anything from his wishlists; spent time and energy working behind the scenes to edit Circle of Salt podcast episodes when Felix was too burnt out to continue; and introduced Rune to the idea that he could set up a discord for his Patreon, as well as walked him through the process step-by-step when he was ready to start it up.

His response? I was berated when I missed a Patreon payment while I was moving out of my abusive ex’s house and into Felix’s. I was questioned when, after I started living with Felix, I was not putting anything in the packages Felix would send him. I was told that I had to pay full price for his witchcraft classes, but was able to include the costs of my many gifts, and the work I’ve done for “his podcast and Patreon”, to “reduce” the payment. I was harassed when a podcast episode wasn’t out “according to schedule”, while Felix was saying that “they weren’t releasing episodes a schedule”.

I was treated like an afterthought by Rune, unless he wanted something directly from me, or he was bored and no one more preferable was interacting with him. There were many times in our conversations, especially after I moved in with Felix, where it was obvious he expected me to become Felix’s maid/emotional caretaker so Rune wouldn’t be burdened by such things and could enjoy Felix’s affections freely. He would only message me first when he wasn’t getting a direct response from Felix within his timeframe (often within 5 minutes of sending the initial message to Felix), or when they had a fight so I could step in and “mediate like he and his husbands do for each other”.

He never treated my relationship with Felix as something separate and distinct from the polycule he was in, and would often lump me in with his “family”, while never asking me if I wanted to be included in the group in the first place. I never consented to being anything more than Rune’s friend, and the one time I tried to broach the topic of us becoming romantically involved, he declared that his romantic plate was full and that he “doesn’t date girls well.” (Btw, I was out as a masc-leaning non-binary person to Rune & Felix by this point).

So, to see that not only Rune, but the “friends” that Felix had while he was “tumblr famous”, spread lies about Felix (and probably got his blogs taken offline), the only person who has been unfalteringly kind to me, someone who had never known true kindness before that point, makes me so upset that I cannot even put it into words. And, though I cannot prove it, I know that Rune has been asking many people, both who know us and those who don’t, to cast baneful magic against us. For what reason, I cannot determine, and the tarot cards are silent. But I can guess that he is afraid of what we may say, based on his reactions on what we have already said, on tumblr and elsewhere.

(For anyone who has read this far, thank you. Please keep in mind that these are just my experiences, and that Rune has not publicly answered anything regarding this latest accusation against his character, as well as the other accusations that Felix and/or I have made, many of which can be found by scrolling down on my blog. As for a call to action, all I ask is that you reserve judgement until Rune responds, or makes it obvious he does not care to. If you want direct links to what I have posted previously, let me know in a reply to this post, and I will tag you when I am able to reblog it. I also ask for your patience, as Felix & I are dealing with a lot of IRL issues as well as online ones, and I may take a few days to reply.)

[bpro-cardstories]

Ryuji Korekuni SSR

2017 ー Flower Garden [Flower Garden]

"Geez….. It’s not like all sweets get you back in a good mood."

Part 1

ーIn the meeting room.ー

Ryuji: ‘…..…..’

(Ryuji-kun somehow doesn’t look well….. Maybe he’s exhausted, because the schedule was packed these days?)

Ryuji (sighs): ‘….. Haa.’

Tsubasa: ‘Uhm, are you fine?’

Ryuji: ‘….. Yeah. I’m just a bit sleep-deprived. Work has been going until late, so we’ve been coming home at midnight recently. My mind and body are so agitated after the recording, that I can’t really fall asleep.’ 

Tsubasa: ‘That sounds hard…..’ 

Ryuji: ‘Well, when we are finished, we can go home. But the staff has to work until even later, so I won’t complain.’ 

Tomohisa (smiles): ‘And besides, it makes us happy when it’s busy.’ 

Ryuji (smiles): ‘Now that you mention it, I heard some unusual work came in.’ 

Tsubasa: ‘Ah, yes! An offer to appear at the Flower Garden opening ceremony came in.’ 

Tomohisa: ‘Does it include singing?’

Tsubasa: ‘Yes, it does.’ 

Tomohisa: ‘Hee, how nice. To be able to sing at something like the Flower Garden sounds romantic.’ 

Ryuji: ‘Hmm…..’ 

Tomohisa: ‘Oh, Ryuji doesn’t seem to be attracted to it?’ 

Ryuji (shakes head): ‘It’s not like that…..’

(Ryuji-kun looks depressed. And seems to be quite tired…..)

Tsubasa: ‘….. Ah! It looks like you will be able to eat plenty of sweets made by a famous hotel pastry chef at the ceremony!’

Tomohisa (smiles): ‘Look, did it catch your interest a bit?’ 

Ryuji (upset): ‘Geez….. It’s not like all sweets get you back in a good mood.’ 

Tomohisa (smiles): ‘Hmm. You seem to be in a pretty bad temper today.’ 

Tsubasa: ‘…..’

(I would like to adjust their schedule in some way, but it seems difficult for a while…..)

Part 2

ーAnother day.ー

(I wonder if the rehearsal for the ceremony is already over? I hope Ryuji-kun is in a better mood…..)

Tsubasa: ‘Hello!’

Ryuji: ‘Oh, Tsubasa, hi.’

Tsubasa: ‘I was able to make a bit of time, so I came to see how you are doing. Here are some refreshments.’ 

Ryuji: ‘! This is…..’

Tsubasa: ‘The pudding from Ryuji-kun’s favourite store!’

Ryuji: ‘…..!’

Tomohisa: ‘Fufu. Good for you, Ryuji.’

Ryuji (smiles): ‘Just when I thought I wanted to eat something sweet. Aren’t you thoughtful, Tsubasa.’

Tomohisa: ‘Ryuji, that’s where you genuinely say thank you, right?’

Ryuji: ‘Uh….. I was about to do that now!’

Ryuji (blushes): ‘….. Thanks.’

Tsubasa: ‘Fufufu, I am glad you were pleased about it.’ 

Ryuji: ‘Since you’re already here, should we eat it together?’

Tsubasa: ‘Yes, thank you very much.’ 

Ryuji: ‘I wonder what flavour should I go with~ ♪.’ 

(I’m glad. His good mood is all back.)  

Tsubasa: ‘Did the rehearsal go well?’

Ryuji: ‘Of course. I was talking with Tomo about how good it feels.’ 

Tomohisa: ‘You don’t need to worry about the performance, it’s going to be fine. Ryuji’s bad temper has also been fixed in this way.’ 

Ryuji: ‘Pah. I’m always in a good mood though?’ 

Tomohisa: ‘Fufu, you’re right.’ 

Ryuji (winks): ‘Tsubasa, we’ll deliver the best performance, so make sure you have your eyes on us.’ 

Tsubasa: ‘Yes! I am looking forward to it.’ 

(Ryuji-kun is so energetic, he does love to stand on the stage after all.)

Part 3

ーThe day of the performance. In the waiting room.ー

Yuta: ‘Ah, it’s Tsubasa-chan! Yahoo!’

Tsubasa: ‘This is where everyone is. Hello!’

Ryuji: ‘…..….. Hello.’

Tsubasa: ‘….. Eh, eh…..?’

(Ryuji-kun is back in a bad mood again…..?)

Tsubasa: ‘Is something wrong?’

Ryuji: ‘….. Not really.’

(Th-The air’s heavy…..!)

Yuta comes closer.

Yuta: ‘Tsubasa-chan, Tsubasa-chan.’

Tsubasa: ‘?’

Yuta: ‘You know, earlier at the venue we met the big people from the organizing. It was only for a bit, but it looks like he was told something mean.’

ーFlashback.ー

Staff: ‘Oh~, it’s you two from KitaKore. Kitakado-kun looks like a prince, so I thought you would certainly be the same type, too….. But you’re a princess, if I had to say so.’ 

Staff: ‘How about trying out women's clothes? It might have some impact? Come on, genderless is in fashion now.’ 

ーEnd of flashback.ー

Tsubasa: ‘How terrible…..’

Yuta: ‘I think the other person didn’t really say it with bad intentions maybe, but…..’ 

Ryuji: ‘Wait, Yuta, what are you telling on me there. Didn’t I say that I didn’t mind it?’

Yuta: ‘But Ryu-chan…..’

Ryuji: ‘That often happens. If I would take that seriously every time, there would be no end to it.’ 

Yuta: ‘Y-Yeah…..’

(That’s Ryuji-kun for you. Just as I thought, because he’s been doing this work since he was a child his reaction sure is mature.)

Ryuji: ‘…..’

Yuta: ‘…..’

(But, the atmosphere is heavy in the end….. That’s not good before the performance.)

The door opens.

Tomohisa: ‘Ryuji, can I have a minute?’

Ryuji: ‘Tomo. What’s wrong?’

Tomohisa (smiles): ‘What could this be?’

Ryuji: ‘What do you mean, it’s obvious just by looking. It’s a macaron, right?’

Tomohisa: ‘It’s alright, so open your mouth. ….. Here, aaah.’

Ryuji: ‘Aaah…..’

Ryuji: ‘….. Nhhn!’

Ryuji: ‘That’s!’

Tomohisa: ‘Fufu, did you figure it out? A macaron from “him” whom Ryuji loves so much. I asked the people at the venue for this favour.’

Ryuji: ‘To think I’d be able to eat it here…..!’

Ryuji: ‘Could it be that he’s here at the venue?’

Tomohisa: ‘No, it’s a shame, but this time it’s only the sweets. But he said that he’s looking forward to the broadcasting of the performance.’

Ryuji: ‘I see.’

Ryuji: ‘Aah, this taste….. It hasn't changed since back then.’

Yuta: ‘Hey, hey, Ryu-chan! Give me one, too!’

Ryuji (laughs): ‘Eh~? What do I do now, hm.’ 

Yuta: ‘Waah, don’t be a bully~~!’

Tsubasa: ‘Fufufu.’

(I’m relieved. The atmosphere around Ryuji-kun instantly brightened.)

Tomohisa: ‘Fufu, in the end Ryuji’s special medicine is sweets.’ 

Part 4

ーAfter the end of the ceremony.ー

Tsubasa: ‘Everyone, good work! It was a really wonderful ceremony.’

Tomohisa: ‘Thank you. It’s been a while since we sang outside, so we also enjoyed it.’ 

Ryuji: ‘Yep. I enjoyed that kind of party for the first time in a while.’ 

Tomohisa: ‘And, there was also an unexpected surprise, no?’ 

Ryuji: ‘Yes, yes, definitely! I didn’t think I would be able to eat “that person’s” sweets.’ 

Tsubasa: ‘Uhm, “that person”…..? Is he an acquaintance of you two?’ 

Tomohisa: ‘To be honest, yes. The pastry chef, who was in charge of the sweets for the ceremony today, is someone we've been indebted to since we were children.’ 

Ryuji: ‘He’s the pastry chef purveyor to the Kitakado household and on parties or special events his sweets were always part of them.’

Tsubasa: ‘I understand.’ 

Ryuji: ‘Especially his macarons are masterpieces. During our Bambi time we both often asked him to make all kinds of sweets for us.’ 

Tomohisa: ‘Though they were mostly Ryuji’s requests.’

Ryuji: ‘Eh, was it so? Didn’t Tomo also want to eat things like Simmered Taro in Sweetened Soy Sauce* or asked for something different than sweets?’ 

Tomohisa: ‘Ahaha, that might be so. You remembered that well.’

Ryuji: ‘But all of them were delicious.’

Tsubasa: ‘Fufu, you do love him a lot.’

Tomohisa: ‘We will introduce him to Tsubasa next time.’

Tomohisa: ‘Before I forget, would you come to our apartment on our free day?’

Ryuji: ‘That sounds great! Because we were busy these days we weren’t able to visit the store, so we’ll ask him to make us lots of sweets ♪.’ 

Tomohisa: ‘Yeah, we will contact you.’ 

Part 5

ーA few days later. In the evening.ー

(The previous location dragged on, so I arrived later than the promised time unfortunately…..)

______

The doorbell rings.

Tomohisa: ‘Hello, Tsubasa. Come in.’

Tsubasa: ‘Hello! I am terribly sorry for my lateness.’

Tomohisa: ‘It’s fine. Now, come into the living room.’

Tsubasa: ‘Yes, excuse me for the intrusion.’

Tsubasa: ‘…..?’

(It smells sweet here…..)

Ryuji: ‘Ah, you finally came.’

Tsubasa: ‘I am sorry to have kept you waiting.’

Ryuji (sighs): ‘Really. I was getting tired of waiting.’

Ryuji (smiles): ‘Come on, sit down already!’

Tsubasa: ‘Y-Yes.’

(I wonder what’s wrong, Ryuji-kun is strangely in a good mood…..?)

Tsubasa: ‘Ryuji-kun, did something happen?’

Tomohisa: ‘Fufu, I wonder?’

Ryuji: ‘Tsubasa!’

Tsubasa: ‘Yes.’

Ryuji: ‘Open your mouth! Here, aaahh.’

Tsubasa: ‘Eh!? ….. Nhmm.’

Ryuji: ‘How is it? This cupcake is from the pastry chef’s store we talked about the other day. Delicious, right?’

Tsubasa: ‘Nn….., very delicious!’

Ryuji: ‘I know, right! There are also cookies and madeleines. Eat away.’ 

Tsubasa: ‘Thank you very much. But, why suddenly…..?’

Ryuji: ‘F-For no reason, really. I just bought them, because I was craving some sweets after I ate the ones at the ceremony last time!’

Tomohisa: ‘Oh, that’s weird? What I heard was surely to make them togeーー’

Ryuji (blushes): ‘Wait, Tomo! Don’t say unnecessary things.’

Tsubasa: ‘…..?’

Ryuji: ‘…..They are just a thank you….. for always taking care of all kinds of….. Things for us…..!’

Tsubasa: ‘! Th-Thank you very much…..! That makes me happy.’

Ryuji: ‘Ngh! I mean, Tsubasa might as well also eat them! It's me who wanted to eat them, that’s the main point here!’ 

Tsubasa: ‘Yes! But I am still happy!’

Tomohisa (winks): ‘Fufufu, then shall we have a tea party today?’

END

______________________

* Simmered Taro in Sweetened Soy Sauce (里芋の煮っころがし・さといものにっころがし): This took me some time to find since it’s a specific dish. Ryuji only used 煮っころがし (Sweetened Soy Sauce) actually, but Google gave me videos and images of the Taro version. It sounds a bit strange to me to only use the soy sauce part, so I included the full name of the dish.   

[mitthsyndic]

Here is my second attempt at writing Thrawn, much longer this time! Again if you have any criticisms or feedback then please feel free to share!

Read on AO3.

Summary: Lieutenant Thrawn meets the reader (gender neutral) at the Ascension Week celebrations on Coruscant, and she offers to show him around her art gallery. (Based roughly on the 2017 Thrawn book). 

Pairing: Thrawn x Reader (gender neutral, Thrawn is still a Lieutenant at this point).

Warnings: None.

Word Count: 1,715.

A Keen Eye

If you'd learned at least one thing from your meeting with Lieutenant Thrawn, it was that he was passionate about art. 

He wasn't simply an admirer or even a collector; he'd told you in detail about how he used an enemy's artwork in order to anticipate their tactics in battle, and ultimately defeat them. From what you could gather from his companions, this proved to be effective far more often than not. Your own companions scoffed dismissively at these claims, and not so politely ushered your group away from Thrawn towards more powerful, influential partygoers. 

However, you believed you could understand where Thrawn was coming from, and you felt compelled to see his analysis in action. After all, it wouldn’t exactly be an inconvenience to you, as he could simply meet you at your own art gallery here on Coruscant. Furthermore, it didn’t take a keen eye for art to notice Thrawn’s strikingly good looks; his dark blue skin and illuminating red eyes caused him to stand out among the other guests, and he was what drew you over here in the first place. If he didn’t appear to be interested in any romantic prospects, you figured you could at least have some fascinating discussions about the pieces in your gallery. 

"I had best follow my companions. However, Lieutenant Thrawn, I'd like to observe your analysis of artwork and the military conclusions you draw in person. Please, take my comm details and contact me to arrange a meeting at my gallery - that is, if you have any spare time." You smiled at him as you offered him your comlink.

His eyes flicked briefly between your face and the comlink, as though he was unsure how to proceed. You tried to read his face; it was unwavering and unreadable. Well, almost. You could have sworn you saw the corner of his mouth slightly upturn into a smile.

Taking your comlink and quickly inputting his details, he responded coolly, "That would be most pleasant. Allow me to check my schedule for my remaining days on Coruscant, and I shall respond with my availability." 

As he handed you back your comlink, your fingers brushed for a brief second. The fleeting contact was intoxicating, yet his expression remained unvarying. It was almost impossible to tell how he felt about the momentary brush of your hands, or if he could tell that your proposition was identical to that of a date. 

"Of course. It was delightful meeting the three of you, and I hope to see you again soon." Politely smiling at Ensign Vanto and Colonel Yularen, you reluctantly trailed after your friends, leaving you with the rest of the evening to reflect on your meeting with Lieutenant Thrawn.

**

It was late; with your thoughts consumed by your encounter with Thrawn, you had left the celebrations and gone to bed at your apartment on Coruscant. Awoken by the faint alert of your comlink, you drowsily sat up and picked it up, allowing the incoming transmission through. 

“Apologies if I woke you. This is Lieutenant Thrawn.” His smooth voice echoed out of the comlink. 

“No, not at all. And, please, there’s no need for titles when we’re alone.” You boldly suggested. From what you could gather, Thrawn was exceptionally good at reading body language and tone, so you tried to convey your desire for a more informal relationship, in case he hadn’t gathered the implications behind your invitation.

“Of course.” You were certain you could hear a smile behind his voice. “This may be of short notice, but I will only remain on Coruscant for another day. There is a lapse in my schedule tomorrow evening, and I leave the following morning. I would like to see the works in your gallery, and hopefully demonstrate my... abilities to you then.”

He was incredibly difficult to read -even more so when you couldn’t see him in person, but you were sure that you could detect a hint of flirtation in his tone.

“Tomorrow evening works for me. Allow me to send you its location. If you need any directions or your schedule suddenly changes, then feel free to contact me. I’ve got my comlink on me at all times.” 

“Thank you. I look forward to meeting you again soon.” Your comlink clicked off, and Thrawn was gone once again. 

You laid back down and allowed your mind to drift off to sleep, thoughts consumed by the mysterious Lieutenant Thrawn and your ‘date’ tomorrow. 

**

You’d spent all day debating on whether or not to close the gallery and give Thrawn a private tour, and, eventually, you decided against it. It was never busy at this time of night anyway, and you didn’t want to appear too forward if you had in fact misinterpreted his intentions, and he really was here to only demonstrate his analytical abilities. Then came the matter of your outfit; he’d provided a rough estimation of his time of arrival, so you couldn’t exactly run off and change into something more ‘date-worthy’ before he arrived, but if you dressed in your regular work clothes then Thrawn may believe that this meeting was strictly business. After much deliberation, you’d settled on an in between that appeared professional, yet a little flirtatious.

Once that was sorted, all you had to do was wait. Many admirers came and went, as did the occasional interested buyer, yet the minutes passed by slowly as you anxiously anticipated his arrival. Normally, you would consider yourself a fairly confident, collected individual, if somewhat an overthinker, but in comparison to Thrawn? You felt almost neurotic. 

Although he’d spent almost a full day now preoccupying your mind, all coherent thoughts dissipated out of your head once he finally stepped into your gallery. He was precisely on time, and wearing simple black garments that had presumably been issued to him by the Empire upon his admission into the academy. From what Colonel Yularen had said, Thrawn had been practically discovered by the Empire, as his home planet was not in a region familiar to you. He also hadn’t mentioned what species he was; at first guess he appeared to be Pantoran, yet his glowing red eyes suggested otherwise. You made a mental note to ask him at some point this evening. Furthermore, you realised he actually hadn’t told you his last name -or maybe he hadn’t told you his first name? As your lack of true knowledge about the man who stood in front of you became more and more apparent, it began to feel like an incredibly stupid idea to invite him here.

Though, it was too late to do anything about that now. I guess I’ll have to make sure I learn everything I didn’t think to ask, you thought as you approached him. His expression was indecipherable, as, you began to suspect, it always was.

“Welcome, Thrawn. May I call you that, or is that your surname? I didn’t think to ask yesterday.” You bit the bullet and chewed your way through the awkward question. 

“It is Mitth'raw'nuruodo. My native language is Cheunh, and Chiss is the name of my species.” He broke eye contact and looked around at the gallery, and you did the same. Currently, it was just the two of you in there. “May I ask how you came to acquire the gallery and its pieces?” 

Though, Thrawn didn’t appear to find it awkward at all. Your eyes locked, and that same small smile you identified the night before appeared on his face. “Yes, you may call me Thrawn. That is my core name, as Chiss names can be difficult for many species to pronounce.”

“Ah, I understand. May I hear it anyway? And, is Chiss the name of your language then?” You asked delicately, although Thrawn appeared unbothered by your questions. 

“Well, I’ve had a passion for art since I was very little, both painting and admiring it. I practiced as much as I could with every bit of free time I had, and I took any even remotely artistic jobs. If a neighbour wanted their walls painted, I’d do it for free and they’d let me keep any leftover paint afterwards. All of my money went towards buying canvases, sketchbooks, paint, brushes, even spray cans. Sometimes I’d even spray paint murals, though I think everyone else saw that as graffiti and vandalism rather than art.” You paused, and the two of you locked eyes again. He was listening intently, so you decided to continue on. “Anyway, as I got older I’d sell my paintings, but it didn’t provide enough money for me to live on, so I begged Zena, the old owner of the gallery, to give me a job here. I did small things at first, like sweeping floors and cleaning picture frames, but eventually I got to lead tours and meet with other artists. When she retired, she left the place to me, and here we are now.” 

Thrawn paused for a few moments, as though he was fully taking in and understanding your words. “How fascinating. Do you still paint now?” Thrawn began to walk slowly towards the closest painting on display.

“Yes, whenever I have any inspiration or time.” You followed close behind, intently watching his focused stare on the painting in front of him. 

He then turned back to you, and stopped just before the painting. “Is any on display? May I see it?” He questioned. 

“No, it’s all in the back in our studio. Plus, I’ve never fought any kind of battle in my life, so I doubt you’re going to be able to observe any military tactics from my paintings.” 

“Perhaps, perhaps not. Many do not realise exactly what their artwork can reveal about themselves or their culture as a whole. So, although you may have never fought before, I could look at your work and anticipate your possible movements and strategies if we were to engage in battle, whether that be in a ship or in hand to hand combat. I have demonstrated it in this particular way once previously with a friend.” 

He noticed the slightly apprehensive look on your face, and smiled. “Of course, we do not have to fight. That would not be very typical behaviour on a date, would it?”

[sadviper]

Woo Do Hwan: Interview with Kankoku TV Drama vol. 97 (Aug 2020)

Once again, much thanks to @staidwaters​ for graciously reviewing and correcting!!! This was a really hefty interview, hope you enjoy~

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Woo Do Hwan

Sword, bow, and horseback riding for the first time

A “Monstrous Newcomer” in a career-making, historical drama debut

In 2016, in the movie “Master”, Woo Do Hwan played the role of Lee Byung Hyun’s subordinate. Even though he appeared onscreen for just three minutes, he left a strong impression, attracting attention. Since then, he starred in “Save Me” (2017 OCN), taking on the nickname of “Monstrous Newcomer” and setting out on a brilliant career path. The next step he takes will be his first historical drama “My Country” (2019 JTBC).

Tackling a historical drama is an ideal chance for young and promising actors to grow; they have a rare chance to study in depth with multiple superb veteran actors over the long filming period. Woo Do Hwan did not miss this opportunity. His new work “The King: Eternal Monarch” (2020 SBS) leverages 120% of what he learned from “My Country”, and his popularity is surging.

Struck by a midwinter waterfall, the most dreadful and frigid opportunity to showcase yourself

--What kind of work is ”My Country”?

WDH: Each of the characters clash with the others for the sake of their personal convictions. This drama depicts their love and friendships. The country they are each reaching for … in a way, you could say they seek the same goal. Everyone wants a country in which they can live happily, but each person has a different path to that goal. This work skillfully depicts the conflicts that arise in the midst of this.

--Please introduce the role that you play.

WDH: Nam Seon-ho is an illegitimate child born to a family of nobles (yanban), and he has suffered greatly because of his birth. The poor guy is only able to relax his guard and laugh when he is with Seo Hwi (played by Yang Se Jong) and his younger sister Yeon (played by Jo Yi Hyun). However, even under such circumstances, he holds onto his ambitions. He doesn’t want other people to experience the same kind of pain that he has endured, so he strives to become the right-hand man of Yi Seong-gye (played by Kim Young-cheol), the future founder and king of the Joseon Dynasty. However, it doesn’t go as expected and I end up in opposition to Hwi, my dearest friend.

--What things did you pay attention to when creating the role?

WDH: Since it’s a period drama, it was difficult to get used to the way of speaking and tone of voice. It took me a while to get the hang of it. Now  I have the opposite problem, I’m doing my best to shake off the historical tone (laughs).

--The gorgeous hairstyles and clothing were a sight to behold.

WDH: Honestly, at first I thought “Long hair probably won’t suit me…” (laugh). So early on, I participated in many concept meetings and tried out different hairstyles. Even with long hair, there are many different hairstyles that can be made, such as wearing with armor or tying it up. I collaborated with the director to choose the most suitable style according to the situation in the drama. I was able to try on as many outfits as hairstyles, but I really enjoyed being  able to wear the special costumes such as the armor and the inspector’s garments; things we normally don’t get the chance to wear.

--How did you practice horseback riding, swordsmanship, and archery?

WDH: Before filming started, I studied martial arts for about two months. Filming lasted nine months, so in total I was focused on this work for a whole year. While filming action, it’s important to skillfully capture the scene, but the most essential thing is to not to get hurt. For that reason, the cinematographer, my co-stars, and I always had to be in perfect sync. It took time to match movements for the sword fights.

--You became the topic of much discussion when you revealed your magnificent physique in a waterfall during the opening of the drama. What are your secrets for managing your fitness?

WDH: I train on a regular basis. If I only started working out when I knew there were going to be scenes with skin showing, it’d be stressful trying to build up my body in a short period of time for shooting. After all, I don’t know when or where I will have to strip down for a scene! (laugh) Usually I play a lot of soccer, and I’ll go to the gym to train if I have time. If I take care of myself properly as a habit, then I don’t need to worry if my body looks good or if I should put in more effort during acting; I can just concentrate on my performance.

--Was the director’s reaction a good one?

WDH: He was extremely happy, hahaha. They keep trying to make me take my clothes off, so I was like, “Come on, give me a break!” The road to the filming location for the waterfall scene was rugged and steep and it was incredibly cold; it was the most difficult scene. Se-jong even said “I never want to go into water that cold again”.

--A lot of viewers said that “Nam Seon-ho is the most pitiful man in the world.” How do you personally feel?

WDH: I wanted to present Seon-ho as a tragic figure, so I was glad that the audience saw him the same way; it encouraged me to put in even more effort and I worked hard to build up his character. Seon-ho constantly stands on the boundary between life and death, living a life where he might die at any moment. He never manages to accomplish any of his dreams, and it is only at the very end that he realizes what is most precious to him. However, even though Seon-ho is a tragic character, if we just focused on the sadness the drama would be hard to watch and it wouldn’t be interesting at all. Therefore I wanted to show many things with him, such as him being a powerful figure, and the loneliness his power hides.

He was able to finish the drama because he was with Se-jong, his co-star of the same age.

--At what points did you sympathize with Seon-ho?

WDH: There is always a conflict in Seon-ho’s life in that he always has to sacrifice something in order to get something he wants. Seon-ho’s situation is an extreme case, of course, but I think that in our lives there are many moments like his, even if they are small and trivial. Moments when we desire what we can’t have, or throw away things we shouldn’t throw away. There are also moments when we all have to give something up for the sake of a goal that we are reaching for.  In the midst of that, I worried about the things that I should protect, so I deeply sympathized with Seon-ho, whose ideals and emotions were in conflict with each other.

--Your portrayal of the character’s emotions was well-received. When was Seon-ho the most emotional?

WDH: It would be when he heard that Seo Hwi was alive. I had a deep rapport with Se-jong in all my scenes with him. From a certain point onwards, the events in the drama truly felt real, and I fell more and more in love with Se-jong (laugh). I deeply empathized with Seon-ho’s emotions, which made me want to perform even more intensely in this work.

--Concerning expressing emotions, are you the type to do a lot of preparation beforehand? Or are you the type to perform what you feel on the spot?

WDH: I think I am half-and-half. Beforehand, I’ll think, “So we’re filming this kind of scene today”,  why is this happening, and what was the situation before this scene? However, it’s difficult to continuously hold onto emotions because there are rehearsals and blocking out our positions with the director. So I will concentrate on creating the emotion in the moment when acting.

--And what about your mutually dependent relationship with Yang Se-jong, who played the role of Seo Hwi?

WDH: I believe it would have been very difficult if Se-jong hadn’t been there. I relied on him a lot. The make-up room was set up in a large van onsite, and while our hair was being done, we would go over our lines. If one person said their lines, then the other person would just naturally respond with their own lines. We are the same age, not just in the drama but also in real life, so in both the Goryeo and modern eras, we were always communicating well, back and forth.

Se-jong always helped me, and even though we were together on location for very long periods of time, not once did we fight or have a conflict of opinion. We spent our time together as good friends, always being considerate of each other.

--There were many scenes of Seon-ho and Hwi’s friendship that brought out tears, but was there a particular scene where you especially felt the friendship between the two?

WDH: All those scenes where we rescued each other. Especially that scene in the latter half, where Hwi took Seon-ho out of Yi Bang-won’s (played by Jang Hyuk) house; that was memorable. Then in the first half, during the massacre of the Liaodong Punitive Expedition advance party, there’s a scene where we cross swords in the midst of combat and I recognize my dear friend Hwi. That scene was very good and had a big impact.

--What is your impression of Seolhyun (AOA) as Han Hee-jae?

WDH: Seolhyun was truly a “celebrity” to me (laugh). She is one of Korea’s top idols; I’ve seen her movies. When I heard that she would be co-starring with me, I was very much looking forward to it. Once we were actually performing together, I was amazed that her acting was even better than I expected. Seolhyun was the youngest on location, but she had a very mature attitude during filming. In front of a large crowd of her seniors, she played a bold and strong woman. I was impressed.

--The antagonism between Seon-ho and his father was one of the highlights of the drama. How was it like to co-star with Ahn Nae-sang, who played the role of your father?

WDH: Ahn Nae-sang sunbae was like a real father, a very interesting person. Although he’d say “Seon-ho is an impertinent son” (laugh), he worked well with me, and did a lot for me. During breaks, he tells jokes and lightens the atmosphere on set, but once filming starts, his gaze radically changes and he becomes a terrifying father. He’s not someone who hands out advice left and right to juniors, rather, he is a person who reacts kindly and looks after us. 

Extremely jealous of Se-jong’s Japanese fanmeet

--What are your thoughts on successfully wrapping up your first historical drama?

WDH: I wore hanbok, long wigs, and armor--I got to experience all of these things for the first time. I’ve also never done things like swordsmanship, archery, or horseback riding, so each one of those was a new challenge. Because I have never lived in that time period, I worried about how I should portray it. Despite that, I enjoyed everything. The remote locations that I visited were very beautiful, and during breaks it was a wonderful experience to enjoy the scenery and watch the seasons change instead of sitting in the dressing room. I’ve heard from my seniors that once you’ve done one historical drama, you’ll want to do another, and now I know what that feeling is like for myself.

--What was the most memorable location?

WDH: In the opening scenes, I often went to the countryside, but first I filmed the waterfall scene and the cliff scene. That cliff scene was absolutely terrifying. I scaled the cliff and did the action scene, but I thought...I might actually die if I fall (strained laugh).

--Watching the behind-the-scenes footage, you seem the quiet type but at the Japanese fanmeeting, I feel that you were skilled at speaking onstage. What is your actual personality?

WDH: Do I look like someone who doesn’t say much? I’m definitely not the talkative type, though. Hahaha. I talk a lot when I’m with Se-jong, but the interesting thing is, how much Se-jong and I will say changes depending on the day. On some days Se-jong speaks more than I do, and on other days I won’t shut up (laugh).

--Since filming continued for about a year, was it difficult to break free from the role of Seon-ho?

WDH: Honestly, I wouldn’t have thought about Seon-ho without today’s interview. However, Seon-ho’s sword is in my living room, so whenever I see it, I’m going to remember (laugh). But because I can’t use historical speech in the drama that I’m currently filming, I try to forget as much as possible.

--Currently you’re in the middle of filming the drama “The King”, right?

WDH: In “The King”, one person plays two different roles. The show depicts parallel worlds. In one world, Lee Min-ho sunbae plays the emperor and my character, Jo Yeong, has been by the emperor’s side since childhood and is the captain of the Royal Guard. In the other world, I am Jo Eun-seop, a social service worker whose personality is the complete opposite to Yeong’s. I’m having a lot of fun filming this, so please look forward to it.

--What does “my country” mean to you?

WDH: I believe it’s the people around me. I have family, I have friends, and I also have colleagues. A life where I can live happily with all of them, that is my dream country, I guess. No one goes on without desire, so I want to live together while caring for each other.

--You’ve been called the “Monstrous Newcomer”. With this kind of recognition, do you feel pressured?

WDH: I’m always under pressure. However, I tell myself I can’t lose to it, I have to work harder to overcome it.

--Finally, a message to your Japanese fans.

WDH: 2020 was the year I definitely wanted to meet all my Japanese fans, but filming for “The King” started earlier than expected and hasn’t finished yet. I was incredibly jealous when I heard that Se-jong held a Japanese fan meeting at the end of 2019. When “The King” finishes, I would like to meet you all. Until then, please take care of yourself and be happy. I will do my best to finish my work and greet you in good form. If you haven’t seen “My Country” yet, I definitely invite you to watch it.  I also hope you look forward to “The King”.

You can direct fan mail to:

KEYEAST / 30, 11-Gil, Hakdong-ro, Gangnam-gu, Seoul 06042 Korea